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CONTENTS //

APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014 • VOLUME 28 • NUMBER 5

EDITOR’S NOTE HOW MARIJUANA SAVED A LIFE

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16 MAIL NEWS FIGHTIN’ WORDS COVER STORY

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OUR PICKS MUSIC THE KNIFE MOVIES

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MAGIC LANTERNS 27 16 ARTS 30 18 DINING 32 22 BITE-SIZED This25is a copyright protected33proof

ASTROLOGY I SAW U CLASSIFIEDS BACKPAGE ©

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EDITORIAL

EDITOR • Jeffrey C. Billman jbillman@folioweekly.com / ext. 115 SENIOR EDITOR • Marlene Dryden mdryden@folioweekly.com / ext. 131 A&E EDITOR • David Johnson BENEFIT SUPPORT djohnson@folioweekly.com / ext. 128 WRITERS-AT-LARGE Susan Cooper Eastman seastman@folioweekly.com Derek Kinner dkinner@folioweekly.com CARTOONIST Tom Tomorrow CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Rob Brezsny, Daniel A. Brown, John E. Citrone, Julie Delegal, AG Gancarski, Nicholas Garnett, Claire Goforth, Janet Harper, Dan Hudak, Shelton Hull, MaryAnn Johanson, Amanda Long, Heather Lovejoy, Nick McGregor, Cameron Meier, Jeff Meyers, Kara Pound, Merl Reagle, Scott Renshaw, Carley Robinson, Chuck Shepherd, Melody Taylor and Abigail Wright

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n page 10, you’ll find a pretty great piece on Florida’s in-the-starter-blocks medical marijuana industry, which is gearing up in the likely (according to polls) event that Amendment 2 passes in November. But likely is not certain, especially given the 60-percent hurdle constitutional amendments have to clear, and the probability that this off-year election will be dominated by the same old, white conservatives who four years ago stuck us with Skeletor as governor. And so, as Election Day nears, your television will be inundated with stories: Reefer Madness-esque tales of erstwhile angelic adolescents hooked on the devil’s weed, heartstring-tuggers about Grandpa finally getting relief from Parkinson’s, etc. I wanted to take this occasion to share a brief story of my own.

First, an admission: I’m pro-drugs.

Or, rather, I believe the War on Drugs has been an abject failure, and that pot — and probably cocaine and mushrooms and molly and whatever else is powering dorm rooms these days — should be at the very least decriminalized, and better yet legalized, regulated and taxed (like alcohol and tobacco).

History, after all, has shown demonstrably that eradicating vice is a fool’s errand.

I digress. The story I wish to tell concerns one of those old, white conservatives who voted for Rick Scott in 2010 and will probably do so again, someone I’ll refer to here only as a friend for reasons that I hope are obvious.

My friend served in Vietnam, and there witnessed things that shook his young psyche to the core. It would take another four decades for the Veterans Administration to declare him disabled due to post-traumatic stress. In the meantime, he tried to quell the anxiety and nightmares through drink and hard drugs, then family and religion, then psychiatric treatment.

None of it worked. The demons never went away. He still fell into black holes of despair, weeks and months when the depression took over and he had to stave off suicidal thoughts.

But disability allowed him to retire, and retirement meant no more drug tests. So he bought some grass, and it worked for him like nothing else had. He was finally able to relax.

Now, every afternoon at about 5 o’clock, my friend sits on his back patio and watches the birds in his backyard and smokes a bowl. Then he eats and reads or watches TV and goes to bed. He’s doing very well.

He’ll never be completely free of PTSD, but at least he’s no longer enslaved by it.

Marijuana, I’m convinced, helped save his life.

His story is anecdotal, but he’s not alone: Right now, the Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of America are lobbying the federal government to test marijuana as a treatment for PTSD. “Anecdotally, we’re hearing it’s working,” a member of the IAVA’s legislative staff told the Washington Times last week, “but we want to have evidence behind it to understand the positives and negatives.”

I’m not under the illusion that pot is a cure-all, or naïve enough to say its legalization will be without unintended consequences. But I find it galling that, in the eyes of Florida law, my friend is a criminal who must risk jail and the black market to get his medicine — and that there are moral crusaders out there who think this is somehow good policy.

Jeffrey C. Billman twitter/jeffreybillman jbillman@folioweekly.com

For

MAIL As Good As You Deserve

certainly have brought charges against him.

The fact that the government accepted I just read the article “What’s Wrong with a fine for the amount of the upcoding Local TV News?” [Fightin’ Words, AG would suggest that there was no intent.

Gancarski, April 16]. You gotta be kidding!

One must not forget that at the time there What’s wrong with local news? The answer were more than 7,000 Medicare codes (it is is not in the article. Take it from me, retired reported that this number has now grown general manager of ABC 25. The answer to to 90,000-plus). Regarding Scott taking the question is simple. What’s wrong with local news is the race for ratings! That’s it! To the Fifth, most attorneys would probably recommend this, as prosecutors will charge suggest anything else is wrong. If you don’t people with perjury even for misspeaking understand the fundamental basis of “local news,” you shouldn’t be writing about same. to investigators.

The same thing that is wrong with local Regarding the state of the state: Do we news is what is wrong with your magazine, really want to bring Crist back? Florida had the Times-Union and anything else that among the worst economies of any state dispenses “news.” “Ratings,” “circulation” when he left office. Over Scott’s first three years, Florida’s gross state product (GSP) and “readership” are simply code words for profit, and until that changes — which it never will — the quality of local news will continue to decline. Duopolies, more national than local coverage, and stories from the Pacific Northwest that are called “local” are a result of the pressure to make This is a copyright protected proof © more this year than last.

I’m all for profits. Make as much as you questions, callof your advertising representative at 260-9770. can, but not atplease the expense news coverage.

FAXdemands YOUR PROOF IF POSSIBLE AT 268-3655 Until and unless the viewer/reader more and raises hell, you are getting as good 031914 as it’s gonna get — and, I might add, as good as you deserve.

PORT

has grown by more than 10 percent versus less than 7 percent for the national gross domestic product (GDP). The number of chronically unemployed and underemployed has decreased from more than 19 percent to just over 13 percent. This insidious type of unemployment has decreased under Scott at twice the national rate. This past year, Florida has had the second-best job creation rate of any state. Do not allow innuendo to unseat the governor who has brought Florida’s economy back from the brink. It would appear that the other option is going to be the man who drove the economy into the ditch.

Bruce A. Fouraker

Clarification Last week we identified David Jaffee as a UNF professor of sociology and economics [News, “The Dark Side of Dredging,” Susan Cooper Eastman]. He is in fact a professor of sociology who specializes in economic sociology.

If you would like to respond to something that appeared in Folio Weekly, please send an email with your address and phone number (for verification purposes only) to mail@folioweekly. com. We reserve the right to edit letters for grammar, clarity and space.

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In Defense of Scott

The letter in the April 16 Folio Weekly regarding Rick Scott [“Diversions,” Ted Mikalsen] is strictly speculation. If Gov. Scott was believed to be guilty of committing Medicare fraud to the tune of $1.6 billion, federal prosecutors would

APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 5

© 2013

ADVERTISING PROO BUZZproof This isNEWS a copyright protected later a founder of the Metro nightclub. a motivator to me,” Selorio says.

30For years, Leonard and please Frieda Saraga questions, callowned your advertising representative at 260-9770.and FAX YOUR PROOF IF POSSIBLE AT Aside from his struggles with sexual identity, Saraga’s Western Wear.) In his late 20s, Scott “I thought I was the only person in the came out as gay — not an easy thing in the world who felt the way I did,” Rosenberg says.

Scott also fought to understand and control his late ’80s in such a proudly conservative and Asked what Scott meant to Jacksonville’s gay bipolar disorder, for which he was hospitalized appearance-conscious city. And then he reached community, Rosenberg replies, “Scott meant more than 50 times. That was hard enough. He’d out to help others do the same. If there’s one everything. Just everything.” also kept secret the bulimia and anorexia he Produced by KL Checked by Sales Rep _CJ PROMISE OF BENEFITquality that defined SUPPORT ASK FOR Scott, that’s it: Whatever TheACTION youth organization JASMYN also got its began inflicting on his body at age 15, until the challenges he faced, he tried to make his start in that tiny conference room. One Tuesday, damage was irreversible. Complications from experience useful to others. then-19-year-old Ernie Selorio Jr. joined the anorexia ultimately killed him.

When he learned about the support group coming-out group. He’d moved here with his At Scott’s funeral at Evergreen Cemetery, Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays, he family from Washington, D.C., and missed the his remains were lowered into the ground in asked his parents to start a local chapter. They gay youth support group meetings he attended a plain wooden casket.Family members threw did so in 1992, even though the family received there. He was distraught, almost suicidal and shovels full of dirt onto the coffin. Scott is death threats. Then, in a conference room at the felt very alone. Scott and Jerry encouraged gone. And while his passing has bruised our Haydon Burns Library, Scott started a small Selorio to start a group here. collective soul, his life made Jacksonville a “I think there has been a group for gay youth who were coming out. One “Scott was the first gay man I met in better, kinder place. vacuum here, I can’t explain of them was childhood friend Jerry Rosenberg, Jacksonville, and he was very much a mentor Susan Cooper Eastman

RUN DATE:

Quote of the Week!

it. A homeless guy in Detroit has more mojo than a millionaire in Jacksonville.”

— Shad Khan, on why Jacksonville can’t seem to get its act together.

A Mayor for Black Jacksonville Cindy Laquidara announced last week that she’s resigning her job as the city of Jacksonville’s chief attorney to take a private-sector gig (she’ll start at Ackerman Senterfitt in July). But some critics believe her departure has more to do with the future of Mayor Alvin Brown.

The mayor, after all, needs an image overhaul.

Last week Peter Rummell, who in the 2011 campaign gave Brown $150,000 and raised another $431,000 through his PAC, told the Times-Union that he no longer supports the mayor, saying Brown “does not know how to manage” and “has no courage.” (Ouch.) But it’s not just powerful Republicans jumping ship.

Brown may not be able to count on the black voters who supported him in 2011, either.

One big problem for the mayor is that his administration has continued to battle at every turn the six federal hiring-discrimination lawsuits he inherited against the Jacksonville Fire & Rescue Department instead of pursuing a settlement. And at the forefront of that fight has been Laquidara.

The city attorney announced her resignation the same day the city entered mediation talks with a flank of civil rights and labor lawyers, as well as attorneys from the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission and the Justice Department, both of which are backing the plaintiffs. Her impending departure didn’t affect the negotiations; by Friday, the sides were still locked in a stalemate. But the black firefighters believe Brown is pushing Laquidara away in order to regroup and refashion his brand.

During the mediation, one firefighter said he’d heard from a City Hall source that Brown had taken a call from the Justice Department before the mediation — another said it was Eric Holder himself — urging him to take action, lest the feds withhold funding from Jacksonville. Maybe that’s wishful thinking — the mayor’s office denies the conversation took place — but the firefighters say it was a similar threat in the late ’80s, over money for the Dames Point Bridge, that got the JFRD to agree to finally hire blacks after a decade of resistance.

They’re hoping the Justice Department will once again force the city’s hand.

RIP, Scott Saraga

There’s a dent in the heart of Jacksonville, a depression left by something precious. Maybe you don’t feel it, but if you’d known Scott Saraga, who died April 18, you probably would.

Scott grew up in 1960s Arlington, in a large, close-knit, well-to-do family. (For more than 6 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014

268

04

2 MINUTES WITH … // DENNIS HO

BILL HUNT, STARTER AT QUEEN’S HARBOUR YACHT & COUNTRY CLUB Folio Weekly: What do starters do?

Hunt: We’re kinda like the maître d’ of the golf course. I’ve got the reservations, people come here to the first tee, and I identify who’s up next, and when it’s time for them to go on, I make sure they get on the tee and go. Or when a guy is being impatient, I tell him to wait. I organize the schedule of who starts and who’s next and so on.

How do you tell the golfers they’re going too slowly?

At first, I always go up to them and say, “Hey, how’re you doing?” And they’ll say, “We’re pretty good,” and then they usually know why I’m really there.

Have you met any big celebrities?

Over the years, Bill Murray, Arnie Palmer, Fred Funk. I did a high-five with Tiger at the TPC after he won.

Why’d you want to work at a golf course?

Because I like golf! After years of being an office guy, 9-to-5 — or, know you, 7-to6 plus weekends — there’re schedules and budgets and issues and a lot of the usual BS with a regular job, I thought it’d be nice to go work on a golf course.

It is true what they say about golf being a gentleman’s sport?

Golf is all about congeniality, sportsmanship and honesty. There’s a few jerks around, but that’s true of all things, as you know.

Is advanced golf technology just so much marketing mumbo jumbo, or is it a real thing?

Yeah, it’s a real thing! You know, my game isn’t good enough to know the difference between this kind of fancy club and the next. It’s good to have good equipment and use good golf balls and stuff, but my instructor just told me to get

regular clubs with regular balls. But these professionals, they can tell one ball from another just by hitting it.

How have golf fashions changed over the years?

Golf fashions! [Laughs.] It used to be really wild. Like the movie Caddyshack.

In the old days, bright green pants, things that don’t match and all that, you know?

And now it’s like, colors come and go, you see trends in the clothing, it’s OK to wear pink if you’re a guy.

Have you ever witnessed a hole-in-one?

I got one! And I witnessed one. The one I got was only witnessed by me, so they say it’s not official.

Where was it?

It was at [World Golf Village’s] King & Bear, No. 14. I was playing by myself. It was winter, 126 yards, I hit the ball, it looked pretty good, I went up there and looked everywhere for it, and there it was in the hole.

Did you celebrate?

Nah, I just went home.

And the one you witnessed?

Same course, No. 6. This guy went up to hit the ball, an older guy, he had a beautiful swing, and he hit the ball right toward the flag, and while it was airborne, I turned to the guy next to me and said, “This is going in the hole. This is a holein-one right here.” And it was! Plop. The ball went right in. The guys he was playing with said that was his eighth hole-in-one.

Some guys have 10 or 20 holes-in-one in their life, and other guys who are great golfers never have one. It’s kind of a lucky thing, you know?

Dennis Ho dho@folioweekly.com APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 7

FIGHTIN’ WORDS

MEET THE NEW TEST (SAME AS THE OLD TEST) The FCAT era is over, but nothing is really changing

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so tragic,” Wood says. “I am tired of the people very year about this time, we hear determining my children’s education, and that complaints — from parents, from of the 2.7 million other public school students, educators, from policy wonks — about the trying to sell me either an ideology or a product.

FCAT, that singular high-stakes test that’s been the centerpiece of Florida’s education policy for Florida parents are no longer buying it. This new so-called accountability system is setting up our 15 years. But that’s about to change. children, schools and communities for failure, Next year, Florida moves to Common Core and we won’t stand for it.” standards, adopting a Sunshine State version of Wood takes particular issue with the fact the national movement toward ensuring that that the state is paying Utah $5.4 million to content and curriculum standards line up, and field-test the new exam, an arrangement in that students across the state and the country are more prepared for the rigors of college, with which Florida is renting questions from Utah for the first year of Common Core testing. more measurable standards based on problemThe common thread between Florida solving and analysis. In 2009, when the Obama and Utah? Utah approved the Common Administration announced its Race to the Top Core, but went its own way and developed program, the president linked achievement its own standards (as did Florida) based on on this test to eligibility for grant money. As the Common Core, under the auspices of the with the lottery, many will enter, few will win.

American Institutes of Research (AIR). AIR States that want a shot at extra federal dough beat out a lot of heavy-hitters for the Florida have to adopt the standards and ensure their contract, including Pearson (which has handled students achieve them — a situation especially the beleaguered FCAT). challenging for a state This does not mollify with as many unique standardized test critics: challenges as Florida.

“I am tired of the people “The whole bait-andCommon Core has determining my children’s switch thing, you can some powerful national slap a different name on advocates, among them education trying to sell it, just like the standards, former governor and me either an ideology and it doesn’t make it maybe presidential any different. It’s still the contender Jeb Bush, or a product.” same thing,” Meredith opinion leaders like The Mears, the co-founder of New York Times’ David Florida Parents Against Common Core, told Brooks and businesses like Pearson, which Tallahassee’s Public Broadcasting Station dominates the textbook market.

WFSU-FM in February.

Locally, Duval County School Perhaps Mears and Wood — and other Superintendent Nikolai Vitti likewise has critics — have good points. Perhaps states spoken to some advantages of Florida’s version rushed to adopt these standards in a chase for of Common Core: “By demonstrating that our Race to the Top money from Washington, as kids are doing better, it leads to more economic public education advocate and testing skeptic opportunities,” Vitti told WOKV-FM. “I think more kids would be going to college, and Florida Diane Ravitch argues. More likely though, if could market that throughout the country.”

Common Core, or the FCAT before it, had Sounds good. But local activists have some not existed, the devil — or the Department of real concerns about almost every major aspect Education — would have had to invent it. of Common Core.

The implementation of Common Core will For example, Colleen Doherty Wood, a likely have glitches along the lines of the testing public school parent, activist and founder of irregularities FCAT-takers experienced this the education reform website 50thnomore.com, month, or some other unforeseen anomalies. marvels at how this test is being pushed on However, in the metrically driven 21st Florida parents.

Century, there’s no escaping a model that “The fact that the state of Florida is planning privileges quantifiable data over anecdotal for the 2014-’15 school year to implement a evidence. Those data are what standardized new assessment, which no one in Florida has testing provides, and bureaucrats crave. And, seen, with questions that have yet to be fieldlike it or not, that genie won’t be going back in tested, to determine third-grade retention, the bottle anytime soon. graduation, class placement, school grades and AG Gancarski half of every teacher’s evaluation and pay, is so twitter/aggancarski ridiculous it would almost be funny if it weren’t mail@folioweekly.com

APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 9

I

How to Get Rich in the

Medical Marijuana Business Cover illustr ation by Shan Stumpf

(or Go Broke Trying)

What happens after A mendment 2 passes?

Story by Fr ancisco Alvar ado Illustr ations by Colin Hayes

10 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014

nside a conference room at a Sheraton Hotel in Miami, Bob Calkin paces in front of a small stage, holding a microphone.

The 50-year-old Los Angeles cannabis hustler with ’80s rock-band hair flies around the United States, charging folks $299 a head to learn how to make a fortune dealing po — sorry, “dispensing medicine.”

Before 9 o’clock on a Saturday morning, 150 wannabe marijuana barons have filed in for a 10-hour crash course put on by Calkin’s company, Cannabis Career Institute.

He’s just raked in $45,000 for a day’s work.

“If I was going to get a business license for my marijuana delivery service,” he tells the audience suggestively, “I would not put ‘marijuana delivery service’ on the form. That is incriminating myself unnecessarily on a public document.

I would jot down ‘delivery of home health care products.’ It’s innocuous but honest.”

His talk hints at the weird world of the medical marijuana biz. Pot is still illegal at the federal level but legal as medicine in 21 states and as a recreational drug in two.

Meanwhile, county, city and town governments are all struggling to regulate an industry that has suddenly transformed from outlaw venture to respectable business.

This November, Florida could become the 22nd state to legalize medical marijuana if more than 60 percent of voters approve an amendment to the state constitution. The ballot language removes state criminal penalties for patients who have a “debilitating medical condition,” for their physicians and caregivers, and for any “medical marijuana treatment center” that registers with the state

of Florida. Amendment 2 specifies that the health department will have six months to set up regulations — including a definition of how much pot is an “adequate supply” of marijuana per patient — and nine months to start issuing patient identification cards.

A “debilitating medical condition” is defined in the amendment to include HIV, AIDS, hepatitis C, Crohn’s disease, Lou Gehrig’s disease, Parkinson’s disease, and “other conditions for which a physician believes that the medical use of marijuana would likely outweigh the potential health risks for a patient.”

Assuming the amendment passes — and there’s a good chance it will, as polls are clocking support between 64 and 78 percent of the vote — anyone who starts a medical marijuana business could make an astronomical amount of money.

Step 1:

Know your medical marijuana history.

Floridians only now have the chance to vote on medical marijuana because of one simple reason: money. It takes at least three to four Brink’s trucks stuffed with Ben Franklins to successfully gather enough signatures of legitimate voters, place the measure on the ballot and then get out the vote. California became the first state to legalize medical marijuana in 1996, thanks to six billionaires who bankrolled the $2 million campaign. Twenty more states have since joined the party.

People United for Medical Marijuana, Florida’s largest pro-pot organization, was on its third try in early 2013. The group had collected only 31,193 signatures and needed 555,618 more. It would be impossible to meet the goal without a major cash infusion.

But People United had public opinion on its side. It commissioned a poll of 600 registered voters, and the results turned out to be mind-boggling. Seven out of 10 Floridians — Democrats, Republicans and Independents — supported legalization.

In Colorado, sales of medical marijuana were $328 million last year. In California, $1 billion. A study by Florida’s Department of Revenue estimates that sales here would be from $137 million to $5.6 billion a year.

Potential entrepreneurs are salivating.

Calkin sold out three seminars and plans eight more from now until Election Day. At the Miami event March 15, dolled-up women in business suits carrying designer handbags sat next to scraggly Rasta dudes with long dreadlocks. Lawyers, doctors and bank officers shared space with general contractors, handymen and guys like Dennis Vallardis, a sunburned Florida lobsterman from Key Largo.

“I’m here to find out how I can make money and create jobs,” Vallardis says.

Commercial real estate investor Mark Santiago, 42, says he’ll open a medical

Ben Pollara, campaign manager for People United, flipped open his Rolodex. A Miamibased government consultant who’d advised Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama, Pollara landed on John Morgan, a prominent Orlandobased trial lawyer who had bundled $672,000 for Obama’s re-election.

“Ben showed me the poll results,” Morgan says, his syrupy Kentucky drawl oozing through the phone line. “Seven out of 10. I like those odds.”

Morgan says he supports medical marijuana because it helped relieve his quadriplegic brother’s pain. “He’d have violent back spasms,” Morgan recalls. “Marijuana was the only thing that worked for him.” His late father, who suffered from cancer and emphysema, also used weed. “He was tethered to machines and on all these drugs that he had no appetite,” Morgan says.

Morgan formed a new political action committee called United for Care and raised close to $5 million through his law firm and family members. The only other major donor is Coral Gables philanthropist and Democratic fundraiser Barbara A. Stiefel, who kicked

marijuana business near Midtown Miami and claims to have an advantage — “decades of experience in the cultivation of high-end cannabis.”

He’s already inked a deal with Calkin to be the institute’s point man in South Florida.

“I have eight figures in the bank,” Santiago brags. “I’m ready to ramp up and run with the big dogs.”

Then again, the whole anticipated pot boom could, in fact, be a bust. Much depends on how rules and regulations get structured at various levels of government.

As history has shown in other states, there might be huge opportunities but also hurdles and pitfalls.

One thing is certain: Making it big in the weed biz is going to take more than converting Junior’s bedroom into a greenhouse.

in $250,000. Morgan became the face of the campaign with radio and television spots airing all over Florida.

Republicans allege that Morgan hijacked the medical marijuana initiative to help his highprofile employee, Charlie Crist, win back the governorship from Rick Scott.

“It’s an issue that the Democrats can use to pump up the youth vote,” Gainesville-based Republican political consultant Alex Patton told BusinessWeek. Rick Wilson, a Republican strategist backing Scott, called the medical marijuana initiative a “game changer” for the 2014 election.

Legendary flip-flopper Crist signed the Marijuana Growhouse Eradication Act into law when he was the Republican governor.

Now, running as a Democrat, he’s all for medical marijuana.

Morgan vehemently denies using the medical marijuana issue to benefit Crist. “If that were the case, I’d just write Charlie a check and go home,” Morgan says. “I am not Machiavellian, as some people make me out to be.”

If Amendment 2 passes, Morgan insists he’ll leave the financial profit to everyone else. “Once

it’s legal, I’m done. I can’t grow Philodendron, much less marijuana, so no — I won’t be getting in the business.”

Step 2:

Go to cannabis “training school” — maybe.

Dropping hundred-dollar bills on medical marijuana classes may seem like a good idea, and some school operators are already making a mint. But David Jones, communications director for the Florida Cannabis Network, a Melbourne-based nonprofit organization, cautions: “Some are trying to be perceived as experts and take advantage of the ill-informed.”

Some classes may offer real insight; others could be just puffing smoke. Calkin says his Cannabis Career Institute can teach people how to create a business plan, find business partners and recruit growers who can cultivate highquality marijuana. Once students have each paid their $299, they can attend as many seminars as they want. “In the marijuana industry, it is all about networking,” Calkin says. “Some people won’t work with you unless someone they know vouches for you. We introduce you APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 11

a marijuana business education course May 3 at the Ramada Hotel & Conference Center in Baymeadows.

“Many people don’t see the potential [medical marijuana] has on the compassionate care side and on the monetary side,” Carr says.

“When November comes is when most of the population will wake up. By then, most of the players will be in the market.”

Long story short: Start preparing now.

Tomorrow may be too late.

Step 3:

Watch out for the feds.

12 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014

to those people.”

Yet it sounds like he has a low bar for who qualifies as an expert: “You can even become a consultant, too, after attending one seminar. You © 2014 can start charging other people to teach them.”

After serving the longest prison sentence ever (30 years) for a marijuana trafficking offense, Robert Platshorn has become the pitchman for making weed available to senior citizens. He’s made a documentary called Should Grandma Smoke Pot? and is a public speaker on the topic.

In late March, Platshorn hosted his own seminar, called “Legal in Florida Medical Marijuana Business Conference.” Held in West Palm Beach, Platshorn’s event sold out despite the fact that he charged $100 more per head than Calkin does. “I brought in the most successful experts from in and out of state to tutor Floridians on the hard facts involved in starting a real cannabis business,” Platshorn says.

One of his featured speakers, Jeremy Bufford, claims to be the founder of Florida’s first “brick-and-mortar” medical marijuana education center. A 33-year-old self-described businessman, Bufford incorporated Medical Marijuana Tampa in February, listing a corporate address that leads to a building with a church on the first floor and empty offices on the floors above it. His website shows that he offers medical marijuana courses online for $499, run by two “professors,” one of whom was the valedictorian of Oaksterdam University, a grow school in Oakland, California.

Back in March, Bufford said he was opening a Miami campus this month and that he will operate 15 dispensaries in Florida. “There’s no substitute for book-learning, and since they’re going to be selling some of their product back to us, we have a huge stake in our students’ ability to grow pot well,” he says. “We issue grades, we have homework, and you’ve gotta put some effort into this.”

Donavan Carr, founder of the Jacksonvillebased Cannabis University of Florida, says he spent three years in California studying

the medical marijuana industry, speaking to lobbyists, investors and lawyers, learning from growers and dispensary owners. He’d wanted to get into the industry, but by the time he arrived, the scene was established — “There were too many players,” he says — and he couldn’t find an entry point. With Amendment 2 on the horizon in Florida, however, Carr saw an opportunity in his home state. He says he established Cannabis University earlier this year to give people “a better understanding of the market and what it has to offer” — not just in growing and selling medical marijuana, but also in associated endeavors like insurance and security. For $299 a session, Cannabis University will host a series of seminars, leading up to the November vote, on how to break into the business, including

Cannabis universities will probably charge you big bucks to explain what I can tell you for free: Pot is still illegal at the federal level, and that creates a few business problems.

First, banks have been reluctant to open accounts or give loans for marijuana-related businesses, for fear that Uncle Sam will prosecute them for money-laundering or aiding drug traffickers.

Also, weed can’t legally be transported across state lines because of federal interstate commerce laws. You won’t be able to buy weed on the day after the election from a California pot farmer. If the law passes, growers will have to start from scratch here.

That said, the feds have already grappled with the conflicting state and federal laws. In a 2009 memo, Deputy U.S. Attorney General David Ogden essentially said the government will not enforce federal law against people who follow state law, provided they follow these seven commandments: Thou shalt not possess firearms.

Thou shalt not commit violence.

Thou shalt not sell to kids without a prescription.

Thou shalt not launder money from illegal marijuana sales.

Thou shalt not possess or sell any other illegal narcotics.

Thou shalt not grow more marijuana than the state legally allows.

Thou shalt not have ties to other criminal enterprises.

Agents from the Drug Enforcement Administration are always on the lookout for violators. Between 2009 and 2012, the feds raided more than 100 dispensaries in California. Last November, DEA agents led

• • • • • • •

raids against a dozen Denver medical marijuana dispensaries they suspected of laundering money and trafficking weed out of Colorado.

Just this month, the DEA shut down four Los Angeles dispensaries.

Basically, if you’re going to open a medical marijuana business, don’t do any gangster shit.

Any medical marijuana operation that opens in late 2015 has the potential to make plenty of money legally selling bud to qualified patients.

In other words: There might be a temptation to act like Tony Montana. Don’t do it.

Step 4:

Pick a business model.

The constitutional amendment requires that the state set up regulations by May 1, 2015, and issue patient cards by August.

Medical marijuana laws differ slightly in each of the 21 states that have legalized pot, but based on regulations in those states, there will likely be two ways to make money.

An individual or a corporation can set up a dispensary, or a “medical marijuana treatment center,” that will grow weed and stock the ganja, plus sell other pot products like food, hash oils and ointments. For mom-and-pop marijuana entrepreneurs, the “caregiver” option typically allows a person who passes a background check to supply weed — excuse me, “provide meds” — to five patients. Florida’s proposed amendment expressly prohibits caregivers from sampling a patient’s medicine.

The Florida financial impact study shows that at least 250,351 caregivers and 1,789 treatment centers would be needed to service an estimated 417,252 patients.

In addition to allowing for dispensaries and caregivers, 15 states allow patients to grow their own pot, though some impose certain restrictions — if the patient suffers financial hardship, for instance, or lives at least 25 miles from a dispensary.

The Florida Department of Health will likely determine who can grow cannabis plants

for patients and how many they can grow. In addition to the health department regulations, the Legislature as well as individual cities and counties could pile on additional laws.

So how much revenue stands to be made?

Once it’s determined how many patients will qualify and how much medicinal weed they’ll need, you can do the math.

Dispensaries around the country charge $20 to $60 for an eighth of an ounce, the equivalent of about three to four joints, says Kris Hermes, a spokesman for Americans for Safe Access, a national organization promoting medical marijuana. Prices are about on par with street prices in Florida — currently about $50 for an eighth. “In California,” Hermes says, “the most potent marijuana can retail at $400 an ounce,” he says. “That amount may last one patient two to three months. But another patient could use it up in two weeks.”

Patients will have to pay for weed out of their own pockets. Health insurers do not cover medical marijuana. “I don’t know of any insurers that have specifically explained why they refuse to reimburse patients,” Hermes says. “It could be that marijuana is still illegal under federal law.”

Step 5:

Partner with someone who is already in the medical marijuana business in another state.

Avoid the headache of having to figure out every potential problem you will face by partnering with someone who’s already been through this rigmarole in another state. The benefits are obvious.

Harold Brooks Jr., a Vero Beach dentist, incorporated Marijuana Florida and Marijuana Miami on Jan. 31. “I see a number of people who come in wheelchairs and who have debilitating diseases,” he says. “They can’t wait for medical marijuana to be legal. They really believe it will help them quit Vicodin and other drug dependencies they have.”

When he gets into the business, he’s got an experienced hand to count on. His son, Steve Brooks, owns two dispensaries and four grow facilities in Colorado. “He’s planning to open two more dispensaries and just opened a store for recreational users,” Harold says.

Via telephone, Steve Brooks says he was building high-end single-family homes until a building boom went bust about four years ago.

He partnered with two other builders to open their first dispensary in Denver in late 2010.

“I got into this business not knowing anything about it,” Steve says. “I had never grown a cannabis plant in my life, and I had never run a retail business. I hired a company to manage and consult on the grow end, and I hired the right people on the retail side.”

Things that are basic daily tasks for normal retail businesses become far more complicated in the pot world. Like simply making deposits.

Steve says he was lucky to find a local bank, which he would not name, willing to let him open an account. “The bank we’re with doesn’t do it out in the open,” Steve says. “If they did, they would be flooded with applications from medical marijuana companies.”

His dispensaries don’t accept personal checks, and though he’s working with his bank to accept credit card payments, he deals primarily in cash for now. Steve declined to say how much he brings in per day but revealed that he hired an armored truck service to pick up money daily. “However, the federal government put pressure on the armored truck industry to stop servicing us,” Steve says. “They have made it more dangerous for the public and the business owner. Now we use a security company to courier money, but we would prefer the armored truck.”

Step 6:

Retain a lawyer who knows the medical marijuana industry.

Throughout Florida, attorneys are coming out of the weed fields to offer their expertise.

Usually, you can run into barristers like Jeff Feiler, a Kendall-based criminal defense lawyer, at the cannabis seminars. Feiler, a snow-haired litigator with a shiny gold Rolex on his wrist, says he is launching a practice devoted to the medical marijuana sector.

In 2009, Feiler’s daughter Allison Feiler and his ex-wife, Miami-Dade County Court Judge APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 13

Loree Schwartz Feiler, opened a dispensary in Denver called Green Tree Medicinals. “As their attorney, I helped them navigate the laws in Colorado,” Jeff Feiler says. “I made sure they knew what had to be done to meet the rules Monand regulations.” Green Tree is about to open a fourth Colorado store.

Attorneys with strong ties to the National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws are also gearing up for the coming crop Tuesof cannabis captains seeking consiglieres.

Norm Kent, a Fort Lauderdale lawyer who Wedsits on NORML’s board, and his law partner Russell Cormican recently incorporated Florida Cannabis Consultants LLC. Paul Petruzzi, a Miami lawyer who’s been a NORML member for 10-plus years, launched a Facebook page to promote his new side gig, Florida Marijuana Licensing LLC. In April, Julian Stroleny and Christopher ThursPagan, a pair of 29-year-old litigators, quit their jobs at the Miami-Dade State Attorney’s Office to get in on the pot boom. Pagan prosecuted Friserious felony cases such as shootings, rapes and drug trafficking. Asked how many grow-house cases he prosecuted, Pagan replies, “Too many, unfortunately.”

SatStroleny handled misdemeanor drug cases and DUIs. “A high percentage were cannabis cases,” he says. “In Florida, you can’t claim SunThis is a copyright protected proof © medical use as a defense. The constitutional amendment [will change] that.”

For questions, please call your advertisingStroleny representative and Pagan quitat to 260-9770. get into medical FAX YOUR PROOF IF consulting POSSIBLE marijuana for AT the268-3655 same reason everyone else is: cash money. Stroleny says his father recently passed away and he now has to help his mom and brothers. Pagan says he’s Producedhaving by _ a baby.

Checked by Sales Rep LT_ SUPPORT ASK FOR ACTION “The State Attorney’s Office doesn’t pay very well,” Stroleny adds. “We get paid less than a school teacher. We found ourselves in a position where we had to provide for our families.”

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Step 7:

2014 — Start lining up©voters who could become your patients.

John Morgan says, “If I need to come back in 2016” to reintroduce a medical marijuana initiative, “I’ll do it,” but he doesn’t think he’ll have to: “I am absolutely confident [Amendment 2] is going to pass.”

His campaign manager, Pollara, offers a more sobering view.

“I have data that shows it’s going to take a massive effort to bring supporters to the polls and educate very reliable voters who haven’t taken a solid position yet,” Pollara says. “This is going to be a statewide campaign, with advertising in every major market in Florida and a massive door-to-door operation.”

Some wannabe dispensary owners realize they’d be wise to help push voters to the polls.

So they’re setting up nonprofits to collect donations, creating campaign material and recruiting volunteers. Contact information they gather could help them identify future patients.

At the March 15 cannabis seminar in Miami, one operator set up a table to sell T-shirts stamped with his nonprofit’s name, Florida Cannabis Care, and logo depicting a red cross superimposed on top of a marijuana leaf hovering over a green map of the state. A thin, 25-year-old man with short blond hair and “Florida Boy” tattooed on his hand, “Joey Pink” (he asked that I not use his real last name) had trekked 173 miles from Melbourne to hawk his tees at $20 a pop.

He said proceeds would be used to sponsor voter registration events. “We want to make sure we do our part,” Pink says. “We need to educate the public, especially the older generations, about the benefits of medical marijuana.”

14 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014

Pink says Florida Cannabis Care will provide caregivers. He doesn’t want to operate a fullblown dispensary. “I really didn’t know anything about the business,” Pink says. “I figured out this is what I wanted to do when I attended the Cannabis Career Institute seminar in Orlando.”

Other nonprofits, like South Floridabased Florida Health Initiative, have launched websites to find volunteers and pick up donations. Cofounder Mario Verde says his group is creating campaign literature and lobbying in Tallahassee. “People are going to get their marijuana any way they can,” Verde says.

“That is the reality of it. When it is legal, at least you know what growers are putting in it.”

Step 8:

Line up your own money, your family’s money, your friends’ money — and probably some loan shark money, too.

On a chilly February evening in the Mile High City, John Knapp unlocks the door to a red-brick, 90,000-square-foot warehouse. A security camera monitors his movements. The dank, earthy aroma of marijuana plants growing in a controlled environment greets visitors with the subtlety of a 6-foot-bong hit. The 28-yearold owner of Good Meds, a 3-year-old company

that operates dispensaries in Boulder and Denver, gives a tour of his facility. He walks through a door with a sign warning that the grow room’s atmosphere is “oxygen deficient.”

There’s certainly a lot of photosynthesis going on. An array of LED growing lights bathes the room in a dusty golden hue, nurturing a compact forest of marijuana plants. “We have about 4,000 plants in the warehouse at any given time,” Knapp says. Though he won’t give a specific number, he says monthly revenues are “several hundred thousand dollars.”

However, Knapp says the cost of running a medical marijuana operation can be in the six figures as well.

That is the hardest lesson that upstart medical marijuana business owners fail to heed: It’s not a simple matter of throwing up grow lights in a warehouse, planting a crop and then smoking a joint as you watch the plants grow.

A successful operation requires all the money and gold coins in Scrooge McDuck’s bank vault and more. To get a license in Colorado, it costs from $3,000 to $14,000, and additional licensing fees can total about $8,000.

The state requires that every licensed medical marijuana facility have a closed-circuit security alarm system on all perimeter entry points and perimeter windows, installed by an alarm installation company approved by the enforcement division. The surveillance has to be done by a security company, which must also be authorized by state regulators. Medical marijuana businesses also have to put in motion detectors, pressure switches and panic alarms.

Knapp and his partners have spent $60,000 putting up a security system that met the standards of Colorado’s marijuana enforcement division.

“We’re not even close to having all our cameras up,” Knapp says. “Every time we turn around and go on a bigger scale, it’s 10 G’s here or 10 G’s there.”

They spent $500,000 in electrical upgrades to expand the operation. “We’ve scaled up our environmental controls, which cost us $250,000,” Knapp says. “We have to epoxy the floor in our drying room. It’s only 2,200 square feet, but the lowest quote was $8,000.”

Medical marijuana businesses have to find capital for buildings, seeds, equipment, computers and all other startup costs through nontraditional lenders. With banks cautious about being prosecuted for money-laundering

governments may opt not to allow any medical marijuana commerce at all. (David DeCamp, director of communications for the city of Jacksonville, says “it’s just premature to even contemplate any fees or regulations right now until we see what the state wants to do.”)

Medical marijuana businesses will have to be wary of legal challenges. Michigan approved medical marijuana in 2008, but when two store owners appealed a civil case against their business, the case went to the state supreme court, which ruled that Michigan’s 2008 medical marijuana law “does not contemplate patientto-patient sales of marijuana for medical use.”

This left an opening for patients and caregivers to grow weed but essentially outlawed dispensaries, and many shut down.

Step 10:

Start a penny stock company servicing the medical marijuana industry.

and Wall Street investors just now starting to take chances on a small handful of startups for the same reasons, entrepreneurs like Knapp are forced to turn to family and friends.

“You can’t go to the bank for anything,” says Mark Santiago, the Miami commercial real estate broker partnering with Calkin. “That is why organized crime and shady entities have penetrated the market. Honest investors aren’t diving in, leaving the market ripe for those other fucking idiots.”

It’s good to have an angel investor, a wealthy family member or a loan shark — one who has a high tolerance for risk.

“You have to convince people to be more risky with their money if it all goes to shit,” Knapp says. “An investor could lose all his money.”

Step 9:

Prepare to lose it all.

Ah, yes. It’s easy to get lost in green dreams, but in truth, they could crumble. The rollout of a medical marijuana program could get bogged down by any number of foes: the Republicancontrolled Legislature, Gov. Scott if he gets reelected or local governments.

On its face, the potential tax revenue looks like red meat for politicians. California charges 7.5 percent sales tax on medical marijuana, generating $58 million to $105 million. Many cities charge a local sales tax on top of that.

Colorado charges 2.9 percent sales tax on medical marijuana, collecting $6 million in the last half of 2013. (Colorado taxes recreational pot, which was made legal in January, at 25 percent; it should bring in from $45 million to $98 million by the end of the year.) In Florida, medical marijuana could bring in $19 million to $337 million per year in taxes.

But consider what happened in New Jersey.

In 2010, the state passed a medical marijuana law that had no provisions for patients to grow their own pot. This forced them to wait for dispensaries to open. But Gov. Chris Christie, a staunch marijuana opponent, limited the number of dispensaries to a mere six. Four years after medical marijuana was legalized, just three of these dispensaries have business licenses, and only one is operational. And access to medical marijuana is limited to those having certain diseases or those with terminal illnesses who are expected to die in a year. New Jersey has only 1,500 patients — who are charged $200 just to obtain a medical card (whereas other states

charge $5 to $15). The 2013 study prepared by Florida’s Department of Revenue estimates that if a similar scenario played out in Florida, only 452 patients would qualify during the first year.

In California, the state that pioneered the medical cheeba industry, bust followed boom.

The state legalized medicinal pot in 1996.

There were essentially no state regulations on dispensaries, so thousands opened. In 2007, the L.A. City Council sought to limit dispensaries to the 186 that were already in business, but resilient entrepreneurs discovered a loophole.

Soon, there were more than 1,000 dispensaries across Los Angeles alone — on almost every block, near schools, everywhere. In 2012, 63 percent of voters supported a measure to limit dispensaries to the stores that had registered before 2007. The City Attorney’s Office is now moving to shut down 970 dispensaries.

In San Diego, the City Council voted to keep no more than 36 dispensaries. Some cities, like Oakland and San Francisco, have enacted clearcut rules that dictate where dispensaries can operate and tack on fees for local government.

In Florida, the Legislature or local municipalities could decide how many businesses will be allowed to open. Some local

Bah, forget the first nine steps. Building a medical marijuana empire doesn’t require so much hard work. Just claim you have a publicly traded business in the marijuana industry and you can reel in suckers with the promise of sizzling stock options. In the past year, Pink Sheets investors have gone bonkers for penny stock companies that have some type of marijuana angle.

John Veit, Cannabis Career Institute’s vice president, says roughly 60 companies claiming to be in the pot or hemp business offer publicly traded stocks on the over-the-counter bulletin board and Pink Sheets.

“Some are legit,” Veit says. “Some are just a couple of dudes in a room who put out a press release on PR Newswire, hoping they get on the news so people get interested in the stock. In terms of volume, I’ve seen pot stocks make gains of 600 to 3,000 percent,” Veit adds.

The problem is, penny stock companies don’t have to put up with the pesky federal scrutiny that GM and Facebook go through, like filing audited financial quarterly reports on time or, you know, not lying to potential investors. “You can say you just bought a 1,000-acre hemp field in China,” Veit says. “You can say you developed a new gizmo that hooks up to a state patient verification system. You don’t have to prove it’s true to anybody.”

South Florida-based Cyber Kiosk Solutions Inc. trades under the symbol CYBK. On Feb. 12,

Cyber Kiosk sent out a news release announcing that Irwin “Izzy” Zalcberg, a “well-known small cap investor with a large Rolodex of connections in the upper echelon of the corporate world,” invested $1 million in the company. Zalcberg “took time from his vacation overseas to complete the transaction,” the release gushed.

A quote attributed to Cyber Kiosk chief executive Chris Clarke said, “Mr. Zalcberg obviously recognized the unique opportunity and value that our age/ID verification and fraud prevention software provides for the legalized marijuana industry.”

Two weeks later, another news release proclaimed the firm “received commitments from marijuana dispensaries in New Jersey and Colorado with nine total locations to beta test the company’s age/ID verification and fraud prevention software.” Cyber Kiosk included a disclaimer that “CYBK will not release the name of the dispensaries until final testing is complete.” How convenient.

The stock’s price bounced from 11 cents to 33 cents seven days later, before dropping to 20 cents, then 15. A visit to the company’s Coral Springs headquarters revealed an empty office. The company’s website is pathetically generic and has no information about software for marijuana dispensaries. According to the company’s September 2013 quarterly report, Cyber Kiosk was a limousine company servicing Jacksonville from 1997 until 2012. At the time, the company had a balance of negative $370 in its checking account.

Initially, Cyber Kiosk CEO Clarke did not want to comment. After several attempts, he recently consented to a brief telephone interview.

Clarke insists his company is a legitimate technology firm servicing the medical marijuana industry. “We are not a fly-by-night company,” he says. “We believed we could expand into that industry and make money. We have a very good business plan.”

Despite Cyber Kiosk’s prolific news release, Clarke says he isn’t looking for ink. “I’m not even interested in you doing an article about us,” he concludes. “Maybe in May or June, we can sit down. Send me an email.” mail@folioweekly.com

A version of this story was first published in Miami New Times and New Times BrowardPalm Beach, Voice Media Group companies.

Additional reporting by Jeffrey C. Billman.

APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 15

SCAN WITH LAYAR TO SEE MORE OF THIS WEEK’S PICKS

Our Picks Reasons to leave the house this week

FARM GOES PUNK ONWARD, ETC.

Abandoning the South Dakota lifestyle of chucking hay bales and plowing crop soil, Onward, Etc. founding member Rosco Wuestewald hit the road at a young age. The traveling project collected a permanent violinist and a percussionist while touring in Hawaii and Washington, and the resulting trio delivers pure, minimalistic Americana fare. Weustwald’s gritty rebel yell soars over cowboy chords and loose percussion as he sings about love lost, drunken nights and life on the road with a whiskey-bottle-full of melancholy-tinged conviction. Oh, and the Civil War-era beards are pretty boss, too. 9 p.m. May 1 at Underbelly, Downtown, $5; 8:30 p.m. May 3 at Ann O’Malley’s, St. Augustine.

INDIE ROCK BEAR HANDS

Indie rock comes in a billion flavors, and discerning stylistic differences among them is increasingly an effort in futility. Kaleidoscopic Brooklyn quartet Bear Hands represents that impeccably, mixing the electro-pop flourishes of former Wesleyan classmates MGMT with the punk-inspired bark lead singer Dylan Rau puts to snarling, wheezing use. Recent album Distraction (particularly “Peacekeeper” and “Giant”) hits the same urgent, dance-your-ass-off high notes as the band’s 2010 debut. Jangly early-morning comedowns are well-represented, too. And tenderly psychedelic album-closer “Thought Wrong” reveals the deep emotional undercurrents anchoring all of Bear Hands’ party-starting jams.

With T3AM and Case Work, 8 p.m. May 1 at Jack Rabbits, San Marco, $10.

WE DON’T NEED NO WATER …

INFERNO STREET PARTY

The idea behind this shindig is that passion for the arts will burn up Downtown, and while that’s all well and good, and we’re cool with the fiery imagery, we’re really psyched to see Molotov Cocktail Party (pictured) play with fire. The professional (and insured) fire entertainment troupe has been wowing for years and drew raves at One Spark for “The Show Must Burn On.” 7-11 p.m. May 1, intersection of Laura and Adams streets. The only slightly overused “Downtown is on Fire” theme continues during First Wednesday Art Walk, with glassblowers, blacksmiths and artist Mark Zimmerman’s interactive memorial to the Great Jacksonville Fire of 1901. 5-9 p.m. May 2; includes more than 50 Downtown venues.

ROARING & BOOZING BOOTLEGGERS’ BALL

Everything in excess, especially excess. Riverside Avondale Preservation’s zoot-suit-friendly Roaring ’20s fundraiser/celebration returns to an as-yetundisclosed location in the spirit of Prohibition, moonshine and gambling. The 77Ds play, flappers dance and everyone eats and drinks courtesy of Biscottis, Blind Fig, Hawkers, Moxie Kitchen + Cocktails, Mojo No. 4 and Pele’s Wood Fire. May 3 at an undisclosed site on Riverside/Avondale Trolley route (trolley runs 6 p.m.-2 a.m.), $70, riversideavondale.org.

ISLE OF EIGHT FLAGS SHRIMP FESTIVAL

These folks take their shrimpin’ seriously. We’re talking a Miss Shrimp Festival Pageant (!) with a scholarship on the line and a pirate parade where some revelers have been known to dress as the cute crustaceans. Captain Edgar Hansen, the “hard-working and conscientious taskmaster” on Deadliest Catch (that’s how Discovery Channel touts him) appears May 3. The weekend includes pirate invasions, arts, antiques, crafts, a 5K run and a boat parade. Did we mention the Miss Shrimp pageant? Pirate parade, 6 p.m. May 1; festival 10 a.m.-6 p.m. May 2, 9 a.m.-6 p.m.

May 3 and 10 a.m.-5 p.m. May 4 in downtown Fernandina Beach.

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SOUL CHARLES BRADLEY

Charles Bradley is a soul revival staple – a man dubbed the “Screaming Eagle of Soul” for his devastating vocal abilities and intensely emotional performance style. But 15 years ago, Bradley was an unknown James Brown impersonator who’d endured homelessness, dead-end kitchen jobs and the murder of his brother. Once the Daptone Records crew discovered Bradley, however, the 50something’s life changed irrevocably: two critically acclaimed albums, the remarkable documentary Soul of America, worldwide tours for adoring fans. As Bradley told us in 2011, “I’m just fighting to [give] people the decency and honesty of a human being that loves.” Can’t argue with that. 8 p.m. May 6 at Freebird Live, Jax Beach, $15.

APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 17

A&E // MUSIC

THE HEARTLAND WANTS WHAT IT WANTS Seattle sextet The Head and the Heart resonates on an emotional level (even if it’s been done before)

I

18 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014

t seems tossed off — cliché even. But The Head and the Heart is actually the best possible name that Josiah Johnson, Jonathan Russell, Charity Rose Thielen, Chris Zasche, Kenny Hensley and Tyler Williams could have picked for their folkand Americana-leaning outfit.

On the one hand, the Seattle-based © 2014 sextet has handled its surge to fame with admirable sagacity. Six months after forming in mid-2009, The Head and the Heart’s self-recorded and self-released eponymous debut album had sold 10,000 copies based on word-of-mouth alone. Six months after that, the band turned down several lucrative major-label offers to sign with indie heavyweights Sub Pop Records.

Six months after that, the band was opening for the likes of Vampire Weekend, Dave Matthews and The Decemberists and licensing early hits “Lost in My Mind,” “Rivers and Roads” and “Down in the Valley” to TV shows and movies like How I Met Your Mother, Sons of Anarchy and Silver Linings Playbook. Six months after that, the band was headlining theaters and making major music festival appearances.

On the other hand, The Head and the Heart has retained plenty of the homespun soul that originally lit its collective fire.

Once all six musicians coalesced around Seattle’s open-mic circuit, local fans and critics latched onto their raucous performance style and butter-smooth group harmonies, twangy acoustic instrumentation and polished mix of folk, pop and rock. It seems simple at first, but the band’s soul-stirring crescendos, soft-loud-soft dynamics and clear-eyed sentimentality are impossible to shake — even for the most skeptical listeners. As Seattle Times critic Andrew Matson noted in April 2011, “The Head and the Heart connect with a rising ‘heartland’ theme that’s close to critic-proof. … [They’re] a fan

favorite on an emotional level, where taste doesn’t factor in.”

If it all sounds very Mumford & Sonsesque, well, that’s because it is: Bearded 20somethings strike a major nerve with a broad audience thanks to a rootsy vibe and a nostalgic-waxing perspective that’s probably not all that authentic. But as The Head and the Heart drummer Tyler Williams told Folio Weekly in early April, the band refuses to lump itself into that simplistic folk-revival category. “We’ve

Critics quickly latched onto their raucous performance style and butter-smooth group harmonies. never felt super-connected to that scene,” he says. “That’s not what we really listened to or drew inspiration from. It’s not unfair: We also have acoustic guitars, that strumming pattern and honest lyrics. If that’s what people want to call it, that’s fine. I just think we may not always be playing that genre. It already feels kind of dead in my mind.”

But wait: The Head and the Heart’s 2013 sophomore album, Let’s Be Still, does mine a similar vein of uplifting Americana, even as it injects subtle electric elements, sociopolitical lyrics and orchestral arrangements into the mix. Williams admitted that the record, which cracked the Billboard 200 Top 10 and topped the folk and independent charts, was written

in snippets of free time stolen away from the band’s grueling tour schedule — and recorded straight off the road. But he says things will be different on his and his bandmates’ as-yet-unannounced third album. “The goal of that second record was to enable us to make more records,” he explains. “It was the proving ground.

And judging by the response we’ve had, I think we passed that test. So in 2015, we’re going to take some time off — which we haven’t really done since 2009 — put our heads down, and come up with something totally unique.”

The band will visit Florida for the first time in May before that much-needed break, brandishing an integrated set list of material from those first two releases.

“We’ve been experimenting with a set list that’s seamless and cohesive since before the release of [Let’s Be Still],” Williams says.

“But we only started to nail it down, putting the right songs in the right place and getting into a bit of a rhythm, while touring in Canada [in late March].”

Even that will probably soon change, Williams says, just as so much about The Head and the Heart has since 2009, when the band was subsisting in a communal house on $10 per day. “We’ve been playing new jams during soundcheck that have the same vibe and the same heart — just different instrumentation,” he says. “We want to expand our boundaries and challenge ourselves. But it’s good to know that we can try out new things and people will follow us wherever we go.”

Nick McGregor mail@folioweekly.com

THE HEAD AND THE HEART with LOST IN THE TREES 8 p.m. May 6, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, $30, 209-0399, pvconcerthall.com

A&E // MUSIC

MALICIOUS INTROSPECTION Earl Sweatshirt is all grown up, back from Samoa and dropping the fiercest verses in hip-hop. Govern yourselves accordingly.

W

here most rappers pursue a policy of full-blast immersion in all-press-isgood-press PR, Los Angeles MC Earl Sweatshirt has practiced a decidedly anti-ego strategy of ducking and weaving in and out of the public eye. He’s dropped a universally acclaimed major-label debut album, but evaded nearly every interview request thrown his way.

He’s become one of contemporary hip-hop’s most celebrated lyricists, but purposefully dodged probing questions about his personal life and musical motivations. He’s cultivated an aura of malicious intensity — Pitchfork described his early self-titled mixtape as “splatterpunk murder fantasies rendered all the more unsettling by his incredible poise” — while standing at a slight distance from his Odd Future crew.

That was obvious in 2010 and 2011, when Odd Future Wolf Gang (Kill Them All) (the crew’s full name) became the most innovative DIY-driven community in hip-hop — and the most virulent. Early material self-released in 2010 to Odd Future’s rapidly expanding online fanbase dabbled on a level of violent, misogynistic fatalism with which even the rap world seemed uncomfortable. But Earl was absent from the rowdy early shows, and Odd Future members Tyler, Domo Genesis and Hodgy Beats began promoting a fervent “Free Earl” campaign that became the group’s calling card — and eventually climaxed in Complex Magazine and The New Yorker discovering exactly what had happened to Earl.

To condense months of investigative reporting: Before joining Odd Future in 2009, Earl went by Sly Tendencies and made a few online tracks with producer Loofy. Tracking down Sly led to evidence of acquaintances calling him “Thebe,” which led to YouTube videos of a young Thebe Kgositsile — son of South African poet laureate Keorapetse Kgositsile — performing a Korean martial art called Hwa Rang Do. One Odd Future song featured a cryptic line about “free[ing] Earl from the Samoans,” which led to online rumors of a school for troubled boys in Samoa, where a student confirmed that yes, Earl Sweatshirt was in attendance while his

friends were becoming crazy famous.

At the time, no one knew if Earl, who was only 17, was sent to Samoa voluntarily or at the behest of his mother, a well-known civil rights activist and law professor. In 2011, she told The New Yorker, “There is a person named Thebe who pre-existed Earl. That person ought to be allowed to explore and grow, and it’s very hard to do that when there’s a whole set of expectations, narratives and stories that are attached to him.” Mom also agreed to let Earl speak via email, and his response was clear: “Please listen: I’m not being held against my will. … I’ve had to do a lot of growing up since I left. … The only thing I need as of right now is space. … You’ll hear from me without a doubt when I’m ready.”

EARL SWEATSHIRT 8 p.m. May 5, Freebird Live, Jax Beach, $20, 246-2473, freebirdlive.com

In a way, Earl’s desire to leave hip-hop and Odd Future and all that behind for nearly two years to “grow up” turned out to be the best decision he could have ever made. On Feb. 9, 2012, his dormant Twitter feed came back to life, and he requested 50,000 new followers before he’d release a new song, appropriately titled “Home.” Three hours later, Earl Sweatshirt was officially back, dropping one of the fieriest verses in hip-hop history that deserves to be recited out loud to appreciate its linguistic dexterity. A sample: Self-loathing narcissist Spittin’ crowbars out the back window of cars and shit And acting like a klonopin binge, hardening And switching up the moniker of artists into arsonists Knock-knock, it’s that prodigal pen-throttle, bitch Popping like the top of a bottle of hot JavaScript Rhyme harder than nine joggers with shin splints dodging an ornery rhinoceros Order me my waffles and bother me not, blogger

The option of being modest just walked to where my father went Ponder how we can holler then spit darker Than Gotham at six bars in the genre then lick shots At imposters and miss nada, volatile pig brawler Is hotter than a lit Parliament singeing your fucking arm In the parking lot of a Target, I’m targeted, piss-harboring, Heart dark as that thick parka I slip markers in Earl could have stopped there. Instead, the onslaught of high-quality, intensely personal material continued. On 2013’s “Chum,” he directly addressed how the Samoa affair “strained and tightened” his relationship with his mother; on “Whoa,” he channeled every comparison to rap-forrap’s-sake legends like MF DOOM and GZA into a devastating lyrical takedown of his own younger rabble-rousing persona; and on “Burgundy,” he rapped, “My priorities fucked up, I know it, I’m afraid I’m going to blow it/When them expectations raising ’cause Daddy was a poet.”

When those singles were finally collected and released on Earl’s proper solo debut, Doris, in October, the 19-year-old’s supreme talent for production (under the pseudonym “Randomblackdude”) and talent scouting only added to his fame as a lyricist. The album charted on the Billboard Top Five, but was also one of the most introspective and antagonistic rap records to ever do so.

Which, naturally, slotted Earl perfectly back in with his Odd Future crew.

Since then, Sweatshirt has wisely capitalized on his success. Yet in many ways, he’s the same old Earl: Uncomfortable with success. Shunning the spotlight. Selfdeprecating to a fault. But sharper lyrically than 99 percent of his peers. Which is why fans love him — and critics continue to fawn over him.

Nick McGregor mail@folioweekly.com APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 19

20 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014

A&E // MUSIC FreebirdLive.com

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THURSDAY MAY 1

VEGABONDS LONDON SOULS DARKHORSE SALOON FRIDAY MAY 2

THE MOVEMENT THE HIP ABDUCTION WELCOME TO THE BEACH SATURDAY MAY 3

WEEKEND FINGER-PICKIN’: Played on everything-and-the-kitchen-sink instruments by stalwart musicians, The Gamble Rogers Festival pays homage to the king of folk and Florida native with artists like Rev. Peyton’s Big Damn Band (pictured) – a cornfed Americana three-piece featuring bait-bucket and washboard percussion, folksy acoustic guitar and effortless style. Heading a full-day lineup of nearly 50 touring and local folk artists, The Duhks have a smoother, more polished take on the genre with sharp, soaring choruses and a backing string section. The festival is held May 2 at St. Augustine Municipal Marina, May 3 at St. Augustine Amphitheatre, and noon May 4 at St. Augustine Beach Pier.

CONCERTS THIS WEEK

M. WARD, MOUNT MORIAH 8 p.m. April 30 at Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, 1050 A1A N., $25, 209-0399.

AER 7 p.m. April 30 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, $15, 398-7496.

SUWANNEE RIVER JAM: Brantley Gilbert, Montgomery Gentry, The Mavericks, Chris Cagle, Justin Moore, The Charlie Daniels Band, Colt Ford, The Lacs, JJ Lawhorn April 30-May 3 at Spirit of the Suwannee Music Park, 3076 95th Dr., Live Oak, $45-$90, 386-364-1683.

JOHN LEGEND 8 p.m. April 30 at The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Downtown, 355-2787.

AA DUO 8 p.m. April 30 at Jacksonville Landing, 2 Independent Dr., Downtown, free, 353-1188.

LARRY MANGUM, JIM CARRICK, CHARLEY SIMMONS, BOB PATTERSON 7:30 p.m. May 1 at Mudville Music Room, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., St. Nicholas, 352-7008.

BEAR HANDS, T3AM, CASE WORK 8 p.m. May 1 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, $10, 398-7496.

VEGABONDS, LONDON SOULS, DARKHORSE SALOON 8 p.m.

May 1, Freebird Live, 200 N. First St., Jax Beach, $8, 246-2473.

ONWARD, ETC. 9 p.m. May 1 at Underbelly, 113 E. Bay St., Downtown, $5, 353-6067.

SAVING ABEL, ASKMEIFICARE, PALM TREES & POWER LINES, PARKRIDGE 7 p.m. May 1 at 1904 Music Hall, 19 N. Ocean St., Downtown, $12.

THE MOVEMENT, THE HIP ABDUCTION, WELCOME TO THE BEACH 8 p.m. May 2 at Freebird Live, 200 N. First St., Jax Beach, $15, 246-2473.

MODERN MEASURE, SIR CHARLES 8 p.m. May 2 at 1904 Music Hall, 19 N. Ocean St., Downtown, $8.

SUNSPOTS, EVERSAY, FIVE KNIVES, FELICITY, WASTED LIGHT 8 p.m. May 2 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, $8, 398-7496.

GAMBLE ROGERS FEST: The Rev. Peyton’s Big Damn Band, Wild Shiners, The Rubies, The Dunehoppers 6 p.m. May 2 at St. Augustine Marina, 245 Vilano Rd., $15, gamblerogersfest.org.

D.A. GUITAR STUDENT RECITAL 7:30 p.m. May 3 at Mudville Music Room, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., St. Nicholas, 352-7008.

DIRT MESSIAH, TREES SETTING FIRES, NOCTURNAL STATE OF MIND 8 p.m. May 3 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, $8, 398-7496.

KNOCK FOR SIX, HATCHETFACE, CRASHMIR, BLACK STACHE 8 p.m. May 3 at Freebird Live, 200 N. First St., Jax Beach, $8, 246-2473.

GAMBLE ROGERS FEST: The Duhks, Flagship Romance, The Currys, Gatorbone, Pierce Pettis, Bing Futch, Jamie DeFrates & Susan Brown, Passerine, WillowWacks, Michael Jordan, Amanda & Scott Anderson Band, Maja Gitana 1 p.m. May 3 at St. Augustine Amphitheatre, 1340 A1A S., $35, gamblerogersfest.org.

BRIT FLOYD 7 p.m. May 4 at The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Downtown, $38.50-$68.50, 355-2787.

AMY GRANT & JACKSONVILLE CHILDREN’S CHORUS BENEFIT 7 p.m. May 4 at T-U Center’s Jacoby Symphony Hall, 300 W. Water St., Downtown, $45-$60, 354-5547, jaxsymphony.org.

THE REVEREND PEYTON’S BIG DAMN BAND 8 p.m. May 4 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, $15, 398-7496.

GAMBLE ROGERS FEST: Oklawaha County Jamboree CD Release Party Noon May 4 at St. Augustine Beach Pier, 350 A1A Beach Blvd., gamblerogersfest.org.

ADRENALINE MOB, DEAR ABBEY, NSOM, STONE BONE, MOSHE’ 6 p.m. May 4 at Underbelly, 113 E. Bay St., Downtown, $10, 353-6067.

GREENSKY BLUEGRASS, HAVE GUN WILL TRAVEL 7 p.m.

May 4 at Freebird Live, 200 N. First St., Jax Beach, $15, 246-2473.

EARL SWEATSHIRT 8 p.m. May 5 at Freebird Live, 200 N. First St., Jax Beach, $20, 246-2473.

CHARLES BRADLEY & HIS EXTRAORDINAIRES 8 p.m.

May 6 at Freebird Live, 200 N. First St., Jax Beach, $15, 246-2473.

JOHN WESLEY (Porcupine Tree), ARTILECT 8 p.m. May 7 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks, San Marco, $10, 398-7496.

TURKUAZ CD Release Show 8 p.m. May 7 at Underbelly, 113 E. Bay St., Downtown, free, 353-6067.

KATCHAFIRE, MAOLI, JAMEN 8 p.m. May 7 at Freebird Live, 200 N. First St., Jax Beach, $15, 246-2473.

UPCOMING CONCERTS

JON PARDI, KIMBERLY PAIGE May 8, TPC Sawgrass MARY BRAGG, DIXIE RODEO May 8, Mudville Music Room

HATCHETFACE

CRASHMIR/BLACK STACHE SUNDAY MAY 4

GREENSKY BLUEGRASS HAVE GUN WILL TRAVEL MONDAY MAY 5

EARL SWEATSHIRT TUESDAY MAY 6

CHARLES BRADLEY & HIS EXTRAORDINAIRES WEDNESDAY MAY 7

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APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 21

A&E // MUSIC

THE KNIFE

Herd of Watts

A BITTERSWEET LEGACY

R

for a one-night campout with some of Rachel’s achel Morningstar Hoffman. If the name favorite bands, and seven years later, it’s matured doesn’t ring a bell, don’t be surprised.

When I was hipped to the upcoming into the music festival it is today. She touched a Purple Hatter’s Ball, an annual concert held in number of lives, and we just tried to deal with it her memory, this year May 9-11 at Spirit of the in a way that she would have wanted.”

Suwanee Music Park in Live Oak, I had no idea Though most of the bands are regional, who she was or why she deserved a three-day show promoter and graphic designer Grant concert in her honor. And that’s probably the Neilson has brought in The Elbow collective way the authorities like it. to sponsor the Jacksonville stage, which Hoffman is another faceless casualty of will host bands from our ruddy little burg, the useless and deadly war on drugs the including Antique Animals, Herd of Watts, government has been waging since Nixon Yankee Slickers, JacksonVegas, Squeedlepuss, coined the term in the early ’70s. Hoffman, a the Parker Urban Band and this year’s big One recent college graduate when she was stopped Spark winners, Grandpa’s Cough Medicine. for a traffic From 2-5 violation, was a.m. each PURPLE HATTER’S BALL busted with a night, the The Heavy Pets, Emancipation Ensemble, The Fritz, The Nth Power, baggie of Jacksonville Rising Appalachia, Beats Antique, Space Capone, The Floozies, pot and four stage will Greenhouse Lounge, Antique Animals, Grandpa’s Cough Medicine, ecstasy pills in feature Silent Herd of Watts, Yankee Slickers, JacksonVegas, Squeedlepuss, February 2007 in Disco, where Universal Green, Parker Urban Band and more Tallahassee. The concertgoers May 9-11, Spirit of the Suwannee Music Park, Live Oak, $40-$125 police made can don purplehattersball.com her an offer: headphones Become an and earbuds, informant and avoid prison. Hoffman was killed and dance to DJ sets while less-motivated in a botched sting designed to net some bigconcertgoers catch some Z’s. time players in the North Florida drug scene.

“I was a personal friend of Rachel’s and have She was murdered with the very handgun she worked with Paul Levine over the years on a was supposed to purchase as part of the sting. variety of things, including PHB,” says Hebron.

Purple Hatter co-organizer Trey Hebron “This year, I wanted to get more involved, and was a friend of Hoffman’s, and he thought a it made sense to [us] to showcase the emerging concert featuring her favorite bands was a way live music scene here in Jacksonville, more to celebrate her memory and create awareness specifically Downtown. In recent years, there for a fund set up by her parents. They started have been a number of Jacksonville bands on it with some of the $2.6 million awarded the the bill, and the number of Duval attendees family as part of a wrongful death lawsuit filed continues to rise year after year. By bringing The against the city of Tallahassee. “Rachel’s Law” Elbow on board, we get to continue cultivating is now in place to protect others from such our local scene while participating in what is coercion by authorities. easily my favorite weekend of the year.”

“The Purple Hatter’s Ball is held in Rachel’s So now that we’ve cleared that up, why the name because it originated as a celebration purple hat? of Rachel’s life,” says Hebron. “When we lost Hoffman, a huge live music fan, would Rachel, it was a big hit for a lot of folks. It was a often attend concerts wearing a large purple very confusing time for a lot of us, so it sort of hat. Rachel’s mom often wears the hat when made sense for us all to come together and talk addressing the crowd at the Hatter’s Ball. It’s about what happened, and more important to a bittersweet legacy, for friends, family let the incident really set in. Paul Levine, who members and fans. organizes Bear Creek Music Festival at Spirit of John E. Citrone Suwannee Music Park, came up with the idea theknife@folioweekly.com

22 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014

COMBICHRIST May 8, Aqua THE HEAD AND THE HEART, LOST IN THE TREES May 8, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall THE MAIN SQUEEZE May 8, 1904 Music Hall PROPAGANDA May 9, Murray Hill Theatre THE FAINT May 9, Freebird Live THE FAB FOUR May 9, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall BLITZEN TRAPPER May 9, Jack Rabbits I SEE STARS, LIKE MOTHS TO FLAMES, GHOST TOWN, RAZIHEL, MISS FORTUNE May 9, Brewster’s Megaplex TONY FURTADO, BRENT BYRD May 9, Original Café Eleven PURPLE HATTER’S BALL: Beats Antique, Emancipator Ensemble, The New Mastersounds, The Heavy Pets, The Nth Power, DubConscious, Space Capone, Rising Appalachia, Greenhouse Lounge May 9-11, Suwannee Music Park BEGGAR’S RIDE, MARK MANDEVILLE, RAIANNE RICHARDS May 10, Mudville Music Room MARION CRANE, BLEEDING IN STEREO, GHOSTWITCH May 10, Jack Rabbits LETLIVE., ARCHITECTS, GLASS CLOUD, I THE MIGHTY May 10, Underbelly SMELLS LIKE GRUNGE (Nirvana cover band) May 10, Burro Bar GARRETT ON ACOUSTIC, LAUREN FINCHAM WITH BLUE HORSE, COUGAR BARREL May 10, Riverside Arts Market ASHTON TAYLOR, BETHNAY & THE TROUBADOURS, CHELSEA SADDLER May 10, Freebird Live BRYCE ALASTAIR BAND, TOM BENNETT, BRENT BYRD May 10, 1904 Music Hall MIKE PINTO, B-SIDE PLAYERS, OJO DE BUEY May 11, Freebird Live SHAI HULUD May 12, Underbelly HOLY WAVE May 12, Shanghai Nobby’s FALSETTA, DEAR ABBEY May 12, Jack Rabbits THE AQUABATS!, KOO KOO KANGAROO May 13, Freebird Live CONOR OBERST, DAWES May 13, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall YOU KNEW ME WHEN May 13, Underbelly LAKEVIEW DRIVE, THE KICKDRUMS May 13, Jack Rabbits ODESZA, KODAK TO GRAPH, LEGINGE May 14, Café Eleven CHER, CYNDI LAUPER May 14, Veterans Memorial Arena MIKE SHACKELFORD May 14, Mudville Music Room V-8 DEATH CAR, CHIEFORIA May 14, Burro Bar ARPETRIO May 14, 1904 Music Hall ON GUARD May 15, Jack Rabbits WOODY PINES May 15, Underbelly GLADYS KNIGHT May 16, T-U Center TEGAN & SARA, LUCIOUS, THE COURTNEYS May 16, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall CRAFT BEER FEST: Something Distant May 16, Veterans Memorial Arena THE GIPSY KINGS May 16, The Florida Theatre THE WINERY DOGS, BILLY SHEEHAN, MIKE PORTNOY, RICHIE KOTZEN May 16, Freebird Live SCREAM OUT LOUD, THE OFFER May 17, Murray Hill Theatre CHRIS BOTTI May 17, The Florida Theatre BOONDOX, BUKSHOT, AQUALEO May 17, Brewster’s MARK WILLIAMS & BLUE HORSE, CLARAN SONTAG, PINE FOREST SCHOOL of the ARTS May 17, Riverside Arts Market LYME IN THE SOUTH MUSIC FEST: Pat DiNizio (of The Smithereens), Alisa Turner, Gregg Kirk (of Zen Engines) May 17 at River City Brewing Company JERRY GARCIA BAND COVER BAND May 17, Jack Rabbits WILLIE NELSON & FAMILY, ALISON KRAUSS, UNION STATION, JERRY DOUGLAS May 18, St. Augustine Amphitheatre ROCK ON THE RIVER: Fitz & the Tantrums, Kongos, Wild Cub, Sleeper Agent, Orwells May 18, Jacksonville Landing CANDY KANE May 18, Mudville Music Room SUPERSUCKERS, GORILLA CANDY, DARKHORSE SALOON May 18, Jack Rabbits THE 1975 May 19, Freebird Live JACK JOHNSON, ALO May 20, St. Augustine Amphitheatre DALE CRICER, DELL SUGGS, BOB PATTERSON May 21, Mudville Music Room STAGES & STEREOS, DARLING PARADE, THE ORPHAN THE POET May 21, Jack Rabbits ANTIQUE ANIMALS May 22, Mellow Mushroom Jax Beach CRANFORD HOLLOW May 22, Jack Rabbits STYX, FOREIGNER, DON FELDER May 23, St. Augustine Amphitheatre JAZZ FEST AFTER DARK: Fusebox Funk, Herd of Watts, Groove Coalition, Heavy Pets, Big Something, Squeedlepuss, Wobbly Toms, Guy & the Yehudas, Goliath Flores, The Dog Apollo, Rickolus, Civil Brute, Jeremiah Johnson, Arvid Smith, Albert Ayler Commemoration May 23, Underbelly, 1904 Music Hall, Burro Bar, Dive Bar, The Volstead, Karpeles Manuscript Museum JAZZ FEST AFTER DARK: Moon Hooch, SPORE, Lumagrove, Dewars, Four Families, Canary in the Coalmine, The Frontier Needs Heroes, Snake Blood Remedy, Cougar Barrel, The Weighted Hands, Christina Wagner, The Sh-Booms, Mama Blue, Skeleton Bros., Goliath Flores, Albert Ayler Commemoration May 24, Underbelly, 1904 Music Hall, Burro Bar, Dive Bar, The Volstead, Karpeles Manuscript Museum BRENT BYRD, SAVANNA LEIGH BASSETT, JORDYN STODDARD May 24, Riverside Arts Market

JAZZ FEST AFTER DARK: Tambor, Naughty Professor, Noisebender & Joe Yorio, JacksonVegas, Parker Urban Band, Project Improv, Willie Evans Jr., Paten Locke, Patrick Evan, Co-Alition, Universal Green, Whole Wheat Bread, All Night Wolves, Taylor Roberts, Albert Ayler Commemoration May 25, Underbelly, 1904 Music Hall, Burro Bar, Dive Bar, The Volstead, Karpeles Museum OLD CROW MEDICINE SHOW May 25, St. Augustine Amphitheatre LUCINDA WILLIAMS May 25, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall UH HUH HER May 26, Jack Rabbits STEEZ CLICK, NATHAN RYAN, PHAT J, JJ DAMON, POTENT DA ROCKSTAR, PINKYKILLA, THROWDOWN KID May 28, Brewster’s Pit KEVIN GATES May 29, Brewster’s Megaplex TARRUS RILEY May 29, Freebird Live LADIES WITH LYRICS: Julie Durden, Rebecca Zapen, Brenda David May 30, Mudville Music Room MARUTA, PANSPERMIA, CUTE & CUDDLY KITTENS, LEPROSY May 30, Burro Bar BREAD & CIRCUS, DANIEL AMEDEE, BETHANY & THE TROUBADOURS, WEEKEND ATLAS, CATALYST May 30, Jack Rabbits PIPESTONE May 30, Freebird Live TRAVELIN’ LIGHT, DEE ABOOD May 31, Mudville Music Room CHICAGO May 31, Metropolitan Park JESSE MONTOYA, PRETTY POLICE STATE, SPIRAL BOUND, JACOB CREEL May 31, Riverside Arts Market DISPLACE, HOLEY MISS MOLEY May 31, Underbelly U2 BY UV May 31, Freebird Live SWITCHFOOT, THOUSAND FOOT KRUTCH May 31, St. Augustine Amphitheatre MARUTA, PANSPERMIA, CUTE & CUDDLY KITTENS, LEPROSY May 31, Burro Bar MATT HIRES, THE WILD AFTER, KYLE COX June 1, Jack Rabbits AMERICAN AQUARIUM, BRYCE ALASTAIR BAND June 2, Jack Rabbits ANDREW JACKSON JIHAD, CHEAP GIRLS, DOGBRETH June 5, Jack Rabbits SCUM, DMIZE, STATIK OF RX June 6, Brewster’s WEEZER June 6, St. Augustine Amphitheatre DRIVE-BY TRUCKERS, WATER LIARS June 6, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall GRIM ZIPPER TOUR: Scum, Dmize, Statik of Rx June 6, Brewster’s Megaplex APPETITE FOR DESTRUCTION (Guns N’ Roses tribute), RED & WHITE CRUE (Mötley Crüe tribute), Poison’d June 6, Freebird Live ARCHNEMESIS June 6, 1904 Music Hall SONGWRITER’S CIRCLE ANNIVESARY: Larry Mangum, Mike Shackelford, Jamie DeFrates June 7, Mudville Music Room BOSTON June 7, St. Augustine Amphitheatre CHRISTOPHER CROSS June 7, Metropolitan Park P.S. CANCER SUCKS BENEFIT: Parkridge, Rosedale, Winter Wave, Attis on the Pine June 7, Jack Rabbits G-MAYN-FROST, ASKMEIFICARE, XXII, LEGIT, INFAMOUS June 10, Freebird Live THE PAPER JETS June 10, Jack Rabbits THRILL KILL KULT June 10, Brewster’s TREEHOUSE!, SUN DRIED VIBES, WHO RESCUED WHO June 11, Jack Rabbits ACOUSTIC ALCHEMY June 12, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall MOVE LIVE June 12, Florida Theatre FOXY SHAZAM, LARRY & HIS FLASK June 13, Freebird Live OTTMAR LIEBERT, LUNA NEGRA June 13, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall MIDNITE, 100% ST. CROIX ROOTS June 13, Jack Rabbits THE CORBITT BROTHERS, LEFTY WILLIAMS BAND, APPLEBUTTER EXPRESS June 13, Underbelly FLORIDA COUNTRY SUPERFEST: Luke Bryan, Jason Aldean, Eric Church, Miranda Lambert, Florida Georgia Line, Little Big Town, Big & Rich, Easton Corbin, Colt Ford, Joe Nichols June 14-15, EverBank Field AMB, PRAY, RAZORZ EDGE June 14, Brewster’s Roc Bar SHAUN PEACE BAND June 14, Jack Rabbits ROD MacDONALD June 14, Mudville Music Room COUNTING CROWS, TOAD THE WET SPROCKET June 14, St. Augustine Amphitheatre THE ROUGH & TUMBLE June 17, Burro Bar PLASTIC PLANETS June 17, Jack Rabbits ANDY GRAMMER June 19, Freebird Live GYPSY STAR, REBECCA ZAPEN June 19, Mudville Music Room GOO GOO DOLLS, DAUGHTRY, PLAIN WHITE T’S June 19, St. Augustine Amphitheatre MERCYGIRL, WHOSOEVER SOUTH June 21, Murray Hill Theatre ANDY KING’S SUMMER SOLSTICE SOIREE June 21, Mudville Music Room PAUL McCARTNEY June 22, Veterans Memorial Arena CRANFORD HOLLOW June 25, Jack Rabbits SUMMER HORNS: Dave Koz, Mindi Abair, Gerald Albright, Richard Elliot June 26, Florida Theatre JIM CARRICK, MAJA GIATANA June 26, Mudville Music Room REBELUTION, IRATION, THE GREEN, STICK FIGURE,

A&E // MUSIC DJ MACKLE June 27, St. Augustine Amphitheatre SOSOS June 28, Jack Rabbits THE WOODGRAINS June 29, Jack Rabbits CHRIS HENRY July 3, Mudville Music Room THE PURE ZEPPELIN EXPERIENCE July 4, Freebird Live LEGIT, G MAYN FROST, ASKMEIFICARE, ALCATRAZ, PINKYKILLA, SYLENT VYLENTZ July 12, Freebird Live DAVE MATTHEWS BAND July 15, Veterans Memorial Arena RAY LAMONTAGNE, JENNY LEWIS, THE BELLE BRIGADE July 15, The Florida Theatre JEREMY MESSERSMITH July 18, Jack Rabbits AMERICAN IDOL LIVE! July 20, St. Augustine Amphitheatre ALL NEW ATMOSPHERE July 20, Jack Rabbits CULTURAL PROFETICA July 25, Freebird Live YING YANG TWINS July 25, Jack Rabbits EMMYLOU HARRIS July 26, T-U Center FALL OUT BOY, NEW POLITICS July 27, St. Augustine Amphitheatre THE SOULSHINE TOUR: Michael Franti & Spearhead, SOJA, Brett Dennen, Trevor Hall July 30, St. Augustine Amphitheatre GAVIN DEGRAW, MATT NATHANSON July 31, St. Augustine Amphitheatre ELLIS PAUL, DONNY BRAZILE Aug. 8, Original CafÊ Eleven ULTIMATE ELVIS BASH Aug. 9, The Florida Theatre CROSBY, STILLS & NASH Aug. 10, St. Augustine Amphitheatre ROCK N’ BLUES FEST: Johnny Winter, Edgar Winter, Vanilla Fudge, Peter Rivera, Kim Simmonds Aug. 14, The Florida Theatre PANIC! AT THE DISCO, WALK THE MOON, YOUNGBLOOD HAWKE Aug. 16, St. Augustine Amphitheatre ZZ TOP, JEFF BECK Sept. 7, St. Augustine Amphitheatre THREE DOORS DOWN ACOUSTIC Sept. 7, The Florida Theatre CONNECTION FESTIVAL: Kermit Ruffins & the BBQ Swingers, Less Than Jake, Surfer Blood, Whole Wheat Bread, Treme Brass Band, Orquestra el Macabeo, La Quilombera, This Frontier Needs Heroes, Jackie Stranger, Weekend Atlas, Northe, Ego Killer, Jah Elect & the I Quality Band, Universal Green, Orange Air, Alexis Rhode, Ryvls, Professor Kilmure, Ruffians, The Gootch, AskMeIfICare, Dirty Automatic, Woven In, Garrett on Acoustic, Tom Bennett Band, Mondo Mike & the Po

Boys, Artilect, Oscar Mike, Kana Kiehm, Parker Urban Band, Knock for Six, Never Ending Struggle Sept. 12-14, Downtown Jacksonville 1964: THE TRIBUTE Sept. 13, The Florida Theatre MOTLEY CRUE, ALICE COOPER Oct. 19, Veterans Memorial Arena LOS LONELY BOYS Oct. 21, The Florida Theatre ANGELAH JOHNSON Oct. 24, The Florida Theatre CELTIC THUNDER Nov. 15, The Florida Theatre

CLUBS AMELIA ISLAND, FERNANDINA BEACH

DAVID’S RESTAURANT & LOUNGE, 802 Ash St., 310-6049 John Springer every Tue.-Wed. Aaron Bing every Fri. & Sat. DOG STAR TAVERN, 10 N. Second St., 277-8010 Working Class Stiff at 9:30 p.m. every Tue. PALACE SALOON, 117 Centre St., 491-3332 Buck Smith every Tue. THE SURF, 3199 S. Fletcher Ave., 491-8999 DJ Roc every Wed. Honey Badgers every Sat.

ARLINGTON, REGENCY

BREWSTER’S MEGAPLEX, 845 University Blvd. N., 223-9850 Saving Abel, Like A Storm on May 1. Adrenaline Mob on May 4. Combichrist on May 8. I See Stars, Like Moths To Flames, Ghost Town, Razihel, Miss Fortune on May 9 MVP’S SPORTS GRILLE, 12777 Atlantic Blvd., 221-1090 Live music 9 p.m. every Fri. & Sat.

AVONDALE, ORTEGA

CASBAH CAFE, 3628 St. Johns Ave., 981-9966 Goliath Flores at 8 p.m. every Wed. Live jazz every Sun. Live music every Mon. ECLIPSE, 4219 St. Johns Ave., 387-3582 DJ Keith every Tue. DJ Free every Fri. DJ SuZi-Rok every Mon. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 3611 St. Johns Ave., 388-0200 DiCarlo Thompson at 1 p.m. on May 4. Live music every Sat. MOJO NO. 4, 3572 St. Johns Ave., 381-6670 Grandpa’s Cough Medicine 10 p.m. on May 2. Live music every Fri. & Sat.

BEACHES

(All venues in Jax Beach unless otherwise noted) 200 FIRST STREET, Courtyard, Neptune Beach, 249-2922 Fish Out of Water at 7:30 p.m. on May 2 BILLY’S BOATHOUSE, 2321 Beach Blvd., 241-9771 Live music every Thur., Fri. & Sun. CANTINA MAYA, 1021 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 247-3227 Live music on May 2-5 CASA MARINA HOTEL, 691 First St. N., 270-0025 RadioLove, Charlie Walker on May 4 CULHANE’S IRISH PUB, 967 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-9595 Robbie & Felix May 9. Irish music 6:30 p.m. every Sun. FLYING IGUANA, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 853-5680 Herd of Watts 7 p.m. on May 5. Red Beard & Stinky E 10 p.m. every Thur. Darren Corlew 1:30 p.m. every Sun. FLY’S TIE IRISH PUB, 177 E. Sailfish Dr., Atlantic Beach, 246-4293 Wes Cobb every Thur. Charlie Walker every Mon. FREEBIRD LIVE, 200 N. First St., 246-2473 Vegabonds, London Souls, Darkhorse Saloon on May 1. The Movement, The Hip Abduction on May 2. Knock for Six, Hatchetface, Crashmir, Black Stache on May 3. Greensky Bluegrass, Have Gun Will Travel on May 4. Earl Sweatshirt on May 5. Charles Bradley & His Extraordinaires on May 6. Katchafire, Maoli May 7. The Faint on May 9 ISLAND GIRL CIGAR BAR, 108 First St., Neptune Beach, 372-0943 Live music every Fri. & Sat. JAXON SOCIAL, 1161 Beach Blvd., 595-5660 Mountain Shore at 9 p.m. on May 2. Rob Walker at 9 p.m. on May 3.

Spade McQuade at 9 p.m. on May 9. Live music every Sat. LANDSHARK CAFE, 1728 Third St. N., 246-6024 Open mic every Wed. Matt Still every Thur.

LYNCH’S IRISH PUB, 514 N. First St., 249-5181 Barrett Jockers every Wed. Split Tone every Thur. Dirty Pete every Sun. Be Easy every Mon. Ryan Campbell every Tue. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1018 N. Third St., 246-1500 Paul Miller on April 30. Squeedlepuss on May 1. Firewater Tent Revival on May 2. Crary & D-Lo on May 3. Legacy on May 8 MEZZA, 110 First St., Neptune Beach, 249-5573 Neil Dixon every Tue. Mike Shackelford every Thur.

MOJO KITCHEN, 1500 Beach Blvd., 247-6636 Live music every Fri. NIPPERS BEACH GRILLE, 2309 Beach Blvd., 247-3300 Cloud 9 on April 30. Live music every Wed.-Sun. NORTH BEACH BISTRO, 725 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic

WEDNESDAY Richard Smith THURSDAY Permission FRIDAY & SATURDAY Oversized Load SUNDAY Monkey Wrench Atlantic Blvd. at the Ocean "UMBOUJD #FBDI t

APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 23

A&E // MUSIC Beach, 372-4105 Live music on May 2 & 3 RAGTIME TAVERN, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 241-7877 Richard Smith on April 30. Permission on May 1.

Oversized Load on May 2 & 3. Monkey Wrench on May 4 THE SHIM SHAM ROOM, 333 First St. N., 372-0781 The Snacks Blues Band at 8 p.m. on May 6 THE TAVERN ON 1ST, 401 N. First St., 435-4124 Prettier Than Matt at 5 p.m. on May 4 WIPEOUTS GRILL, 1589 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 247-4508 Common Ground 7-11 p.m. on May 1

DOWNTOWN

1904 MUSIC HALL, 19 Ocean St. N. Saving Abel, Askmeificare, Palm Trees & Power Lines, Parkridge on May 1. Modern Measure, Sir Charles on May 2. The Violent 5 on May 7. The Main Squeeze on May 8. Live music every Thur.-Sat. & Mon. BURRO BAR, 100 E. Adams St., 677-2977 Wayne Graham 7 p.m. on May 1. Live music every Wed.-Sat. DOS GATOS, 123 E. Forsyth St., 354-0666 DJ NickFresh 9 p.m. every Sat. FIONN MacCOOL’S, Jax Landing, Ste. 176, 374-1247 Braxton Adamson 5-8 p.m., Savanna Leigh Bassett 8:30 p.m. on May 2. 2 Live Dudes 8 p.m. on May 3. Spade McQuade 5-8 p.m. on May 7. Braxton Adamson 5-8 p.m., Chuck Nash Duo 8:30 p.m. on May 9 JACKSONVILLE LANDING, 2 Independent Dr., 353-1188 AA Duo 6 p.m. on April 30. Catch the Groove 9:30 p.m.-1:30 a.m. on May 2. Radio 80 9:30 p.m.-1:30 a.m. on May 3. All Night Yahtzee, The George Aspinall Duo 2-6 p.m. on May 4.

Red Black Main, Brittney Lawrence & the Grave Diggers 5-9 p.m. on May 7. Go Ask Alice 6-10 p.m. on May 8. Boogie Freaks 8 p.m.-mid. on May 9. Live music every Thur.-Sat. MARK’S DOWNTOWN, 315 E. Bay St., 355-5099 DJ Roy Luis every Wed. DJ Vinn Thur. DJ 007 every Fri. Bay Street every Sat. MAVERICKS, Jax Landing, 2 Independent Dr., 356-1110 Justin Adams at 6 p.m. on May 9. Joe Buck, Big Tasty every Thur.-Sat. UNDERBELLY, 113 E. Bay St., 353-6067 Onward, Etc. and Bread & Circus on May 1. Adrenaline Mob, Dear Abbey, Stone Bone on May 4. Turkuaz CD release show 8 p.m. on May 7

FLEMING ISLAND

MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1800 Town Center Blvd., 541-1999 Live music Fri. & Sat.

JAX BEACH SUNDAY Spade McQuade 6-9 pm TUESDAY ,JET OJHIU BDUJWJUJFT t LJET NFBM VOEFS

,BSBPLF QN (SFBU %SJOL 4QFDJBMT -BUF OJHIU .FOV WEDNESDAY +BN OJHIU XJUI 4ZOZSHZ QN THURSDAY #SJUJTI *OWBTJPO .VTJD &YUSBWBHBO[B FRIDAY-SATURDAY i)PNF PG UIF 8PSME T .PTU 5BMFOUFE 8BJU 4UBGGw %JOOFS 4IPX .VTJD &YUSBWBHBO[B QN $MPTF

WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198 Love Monkey 9:30 p.m. on May 2 & 3. Open mic 9 p.m. every Thur. Deck music at 5 p.m. every Fri. & Sat., 4:30 p.m. Sun. DJ BG every Mon.

INTRACOASTAL WEST

CLIFF’S BAR & GRILL, 3033 Monument Rd., 645-5162 Live music every Wed., Fri. & Sat. SALSA’S MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 13500 Beach Blvd., 992-8402 Live guitar music 6-9 p.m. every Tue. & Sat.

MANDARIN, JULINGTON

HARMONIOUS MONKS, 10550 Old St. Augustine, 880-3040 Spade McQuade on May 4. Open mic: Synergy 8 p.m. every Wed. World’s Most Talented Waitstaff 9 p.m. every Fri. MONKEY’S UNCLE, 10503 San Jose Blvd., 260-1349 Live music May 1

ORANGE PARK, MIDDLEBURG

THE HILLTOP, 2030 Wells, 272-5959 John Michael every Wed.-Sat. PREVATT’S SPORTS BAR, 2620 Blanding Blvd., 282-1564 DJ Tammy 9 p.m. every Wed. THE ROADHOUSE, 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611 Bread & Butter 10 p.m. on May 2 & 3. DJ Big Mike 10 p.m. every Thur. Live music every Fri. & Sat.

PONTE VEDRA, PALM VALLEY

ISLAND GIRL CIGAR BAR, 820 A1A N., 834-2492 Live music every Fri. & Sat. PUSSER’S GRILLE, 816 A1A N., 280-7766 Aaron Koerner 6 p.m. on April 30. Billy Buchanan 6 p.m. on May 1. Live music every Wed.-Sun. TABLE 1, 330 A1A N., Ste. 208, 280-5515 Jesse Cruce 6 p.m. on April 30 & May 7, 7:30 p.m. May 2. Gary Starling Jazz Band on May 1 & 8. Live music every Wed.-Sat.

RIVERSIDE, WESTSIDE

KICKBACKS, 910 King St., 388-9551 Ray & Taylor 8:30 p.m. every Thur. Robby Shenk every Sun. MURRAY HILL THEATRE, 932 Edgewood Ave. S., 388-7807 Josh Howell 8 p.m. on May 2. Propaganda, Swoope, JGivens, Kidd Swift, DJ Efechto 8 p.m. on May 9. Live music every

Fri. & Sat. RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET, 715 Riverside Ave., 389-2449 La Caroline at 10:30 a.m. on May 3

ST. AUGUSTINE

ANN O’MALLEY’S, 23 Orange St., 825-4040 The Pickled Beets 8:30 p.m. on May 2. Onward, Etc. 8:30 p.m. on May 3 CAFE ELEVEN, 501 A1A Beach Blvd., St. Augustine Beach, 460-9311 The Expanders 8 p.m. on May 5. Tony Furtado, Brent Byrd on May 9 CELLAR UPSTAIRS, 157 King St., 826-1594 The Committee on May 2. Billy Buchanan 2 p.m., The Committee on May 3.

Vinny Jacobs 2 p.m. on May 4 CONCH HOUSE, 57 Comares Ave., 829-8646 Live music on May 2 & 3 HARRY’S SEAFOOD, 46 Avenida Menendez, 824-7765 Billy Bowers 6 p.m. on May 7 KINGFISH GRILL, 252 Yacht Club Dr., 824-2111 Vinnie Jacobs 6 p.m. on May 1. Heartstrings 7 p.m. on May 2.

Mountain Shore 7 pm. on May 3. Doug McRae 6 p.m. May 8 MELLOW MUSHROOM, 410 Anastasia Blvd., 826-4040 Yankee Slickers on May 2. Live music every Fri. MILL TOP TAVERN & LISTENING ROOM, 19-1/2 St. George St., 829-2329 Back From the Brink at 9 p.m. on May 2. Don David Trio on May 3. Stava Nala at 1 p.m. on May 4. Adam Lee 9 p.m. on May 7. Aaron Esposito 9 p.m. every Thur.

David Strom at 9 p.m. every Mon. Donny Brazile at 9 p.m. every Tue. SANGRIA’S, 35 Hypolita St., 827-1947 Mitch Kuhman 6-10 p.m. on May 1. Live music every Thur.

THE STANDARD, 200 Anastasia Blvd., 274-2090 Rising Appalachia at 7 p.m. on May 7 TRADEWINDS, 124 Charlotte St., 829-9336 Live music at 9 p.m. on May 2 & 3. Matanzas every Sun.-Thur.

Elizabeth Roth every Sat. Keith Godwin & the Rio Grande Band every Sun.

ST. JOHNS TOWN CENTER

BLACKFINN GRILLE, 4840 Big Island Dr., 345-3466 Live music 5 p.m. every Wed., 9 p.m. every Thur.-Sat. SUITE, 4880 Big Island Dr., 493-9305 Live music 9 p.m. every Fri. & Sat.

SAN MARCO, SOUTHBANK

JACK RABBITS, 1528 Hendricks Ave., 398-7496 Aer at 7 p.m. on April 30. Bear Hands, T3AM, Case Work on May 1.

Sunspots, Eversay, Five Knives, Felicity, Wasted Light on May 2. Trees Setting Fires, Nocturnal State of Mind on May 3. Rev. Peyton’s Big Damn Band on May 4. John Wesley (Porcupine Tree), Artilect on May 7. Blitzen Trapper on May 9 MUDVILLE MUSIC ROOM, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., 352-7008 Larry Mangum, Jim Carrick, Charley Simmons, Bob Patterson at 7:30 p.m. May 1. D.A. Guitar Student Recital at 7:30 p.m. May 3. Mary Bragg, Dixie Rodeo at 7:30 p.m. May 8 RIVER CITY BREWING COMPANY, 835 Museum Circle, 398-2299 Lyme in the South Music Fest: Pat DiNizio (The Smithereens), Alisa Turner, Gregg Kirk (Zen Engines) on May 7

SOUTHSIDE, BAYMEADOWS

ISLAND GIRL, 7860 Gate Pkwy., Ste. 115, 854-6060 Live music every Fri. & Sat. LATITUDE 30, 10370 Philips Hwy., 365-5555 VJ Didactic on May 1. Love Struck Robot on May 2 & 3. Live music every Thur.-Sat. MY PLACE BAR & GRILL, 9550 Baymeadows Rd., 737-5299 Fat Cactus on May 2 & 3 WILD WING CAFE, 4555 Southside Blvd., 998-9464 Chris Brinkley on April 30. Kurt Lanham, Double Down on May 2.

Chilly Rhino on May 3 WORLD OF BEER, 9700 Deer Lake Ct., Ste. 1, 551-5929 DiCarlo Thompson at 8 p.m. on May 1. Prettier Than Matt at 9 p.m. on May 3 WXYZ BAR, 4812 Deer Lake Dr. W., 998-4448 DJ Bizzi at 8 p.m. every other Fri.

SPRINGFIELD, NORTHSIDE

DAMES POINT MARINA, 4542 Irving Rd., 751-3043 Live music every Fri. & Sat. HWY. 17 ROADHOUSE, 850532 U.S. 17, Yulee, 225-9211 Live music every Fri. & Sat. THREE LAYERS COFFEEHOUSE, 1602 Walnut St., 355-9791 Open mic at 7 p.m. on May 1. Mama Blue at 6:30 p.m. on May 6. Live music every Sat.

Want your band’s concert dates listed here? Email details – date, time, venue, ticket price and ‌ uh ‌ band name – to djohnson@folioweekly.com or mdryden@folioweekly.com.

The deadline is 4 p.m. Friday.

24 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014

A&E // MOVIES

NO NUANCE NEEDED This unnecessary sequel has good guys (who win) and bad guys (who lose), caricatures all

T

wo years on from the first pointless reboot of the Spider-Man story — a mere five years after the previous version had wrapped up — the pointless sequel has arrived. Except now we’ve had two more years of cogent, witty Avengers flicks, and The Amazing Spider-Man 2 suffers badly by comparison. This looks like a throwback to a time when comic-book movies were kiddie fare and nothing else; it feels like a campy Saturday-morning cartoon left over from the 1970s, and not the smart, relevant sciencefiction action drama the genre has matured into on the big screen.

There’s nothing wrong with a movie that’s only for the little ones, and this one is fine for them. As long as they can sit still for the nearly two-and-half-hour runtime, that is.

Clearly, returning director Marc Webb would like for this to be taken as serious drama, at least in part, so amid the cartoonish action, they crammed in some angst for Peter Parker over the mystery of his parents’ fate. This gives us one truly moving scene between Peter (Andrew Garfield) and Aunt May (Sally Field) that pains both of them. It nearly brought me to tears: Field is, of course, a cinematic goddess with a deeply sympathetic screen presence, and Garfield is the sort of actor who doesn’t sublimate emotion; it’s all out there on his face all the time.

But those few dramatic moments seem cut-and-pasted from another film. That Peter does not appear to be the same one who engages in vaudevillian antics with caricatures of bad guys. (And he barely is the same guy: Instead, he’s a CGI construct who doesn’t move in realistic ways, even for a mutant, with

Garfield’s voice spouting some clownish jests from somewhere in the vicinity.) They’re the kind of cartoon villains who will pause their evildoing for a warm moment between Spidey and a little kid from the crowd of onlookers … and Spider-Man’s coup de grâce after defeating a bad guy will be to pull down the criminal’s trousers to reveal a pair of “funny” boxer shorts. Groucho Marx might approve, but who else would?

This feels like a campy Saturday-morning cartoon left over from the 1970s, and not the smart, relevant science-fiction action drama the genre has matured into on the big screen.

There was little concern on anyone’s part to ensure that Peter’s girlfriend, Gwen Stacy (Emma Stone, shamefully misused), is anything more than a caricature, either. Her main job seems to be standing around in her gorgeous wardrobe looking “amazing” and being “adorable.” Even after some extreme buffeting during the film’s climactic battle — in which she is naturally put in jeopardy just to torment Peter — she doesn’t even have a run in her very expensive stockings. The only other thing she gets to do is to suddenly have secret, apparently impossible-to-come-by

knowledge just when it benefits Peter … and can move the plot along.

This is the sort of movie in which a mad scientist (Marton Csokas) wears real lipstick and eyeliner; perhaps he’s channeling Dr. Frank-N-Furter. It’s the sort of movie in which the employees of world-class scientific operation Oscorp have to be so insanely undedicated to their work that they knowingly endanger the actual physical structure of their Manhattan skyscraper — because that’s funny, and because it’s needed to set up the Rube Goldberg situation that will create a new supervillain. This is the sort of movie in which both supervillains — nerdy engineer and Spider-Man fan Max Dillion, who becomes the electrifying Electro (Jamie Foxx), and Peter’s friend Harry Osborn, who becomes the Green Goblin (Dane DeHaan) — turn on a dime from loving Peter/Spidey to hating him.

The bad guys are just bad, OK? The hero can crack wise in life-and-death situations not out of bitterness or cynicism or anger (like, say, Tony Stark does), but simply because he’s the good guy and neither he nor the story itself has any doubts whatsoever that he will prevail.

Simplistic tales of good and evil may satisfy little kids, but those of us who’ve come to expect deeper layers in our mutants and caped crusaders demand more.

MaryAnn Johanson mail@folioweekly.com

THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN 2 **@@ Rated PG-13 • Opens May 2

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A&E // MOVIES

BIG DREAMS DON’T ALWAYS COME TRUE At 85, Alejandro Jodorowosky offers a grandiose vision of what ‘Dune’ might have been. A studio-busting flop is more likely

W

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nightmarish set designs to Star Wars’ climactic hen I reach my 80s, I hope I’m half lightsaber duel to android POV shots in The the dreamer 85-year-old Alejandro Terminator to the universe-spanning tracking Jodorowsky is today. The iconoclastic shot that popped up in Contact. Again, many director of such hallucinatory surrealist films of these assertions are more wishful thinking as El Topo and The Holy Mountain gets the fullthan truth. Star Wars was clearly an homage on fanboy treatment as director Frank Pavich to swashbuckling serials, and the universe chronicles the Chilean filmmaker’s failed quest shot was first seen in Charles and Ray Eames’ to film Frank Herbert’s sci-fi epic Dune.

Powers of Ten, but there’s little doubt that Planned several years before the release Jodorwosky’s ideas certainly preceded them. of Star Wars, Pavich is convinced (along with Pavich’s greatest asset is Jodorowsky others) that Jodorowsky’s shoulda-wouldahimself, who proves to be a wonderful coulda-been masterpiece was destined to storyteller, winning us over with his energy and become the greatest science-fiction film ever charm as he explains the logic behind his ideas made. It’s hyperbole, but imagining what if? and recounts amusing anecdotes about how he can be fun, especially when you consider the enlisted and negotiated the involvement of his vision the cult director had for Herbert’s epic. cast and crew. To Welles, he promised on-set One thing Pavich makes abundantly clear: meals by his favorite Parisian chef; he offered to Jodorowsky dreamed big. He spent two years pay Dali (per on-screen minute of appearance) crafting a script (without having read the book) more than any other and recruited French actor in history. The comic artist Jean JODOROWSKY’S DUNE filmmaker was clearly “Moebius” Giraud to a savvy, if eccentric, handle the storyboards, ***@ operator, and damned which weighed in at Rated PG-13 • Opens May 2 at Sun-Ray Cinema if you don’t start to 3,000 pages. His goal think that maybe he was to make a movie could’ve pulled the whole insane thing off. that would recreate what it felt like to be on And, yes, Jodorowsky is still a little bitter.

LSD, thus enlightening all of humanity. He also envisioned the film clocking in at 12 hours or so. After all, not only did all his planning and creativity come to naught, but he also subjected Today we’d laugh at such grandiose claims, his son Brontis to two grueling years of but Jodorowsky managed to assemble an full-time martial arts and combat training impressive roster of talent to help bring his to prep for his portrayal of Paul. Though he vision to life. Salvador Dali, Orson Welles, and business partner Michel Seydoux both Mick Jagger and members of Pink Floyd all invested and raised substantial sums to bring signed on. Rejecting special-effects wizard Dune to fruition, no Hollywood studio would Douglas Trumbull (2001: A Space Odyssey) sign on. Seydoux sold off his rights to Dino De as being too greedy and arrogant, he drafted Laurentiis, who eventually produced David Dan O’Bannon, sci-fi novel artist Chris Foss Lynch’s disastrous 1984 adaptation. and then-unknown H.R. Giger (who won an Pavich and industry fans assert that Oscar for his work on Alien) to help design Jodorowsky’s vision of Dune would have set the film’s look. Seeing how each bought into science-fiction cinema on a path quite different Jodorowsky’s ambitions and catching glimpses of the resulting illustrations and storyboards — than the one eventually charted by Star Wars, which the director still preserves in a colossal that its success would have ushered in an age illustrated screenplay (three were made at the of intelligent big-screen speculative fiction. time) — it’s hard to deny that his vision was Given the mercurial talents and extravagant anything short of spectacular. ambitions involved, it seems far more likely the film would’ve eclipsed Heaven’s Gate as a Pavich also makes the claim that several of studio-busting flop. Still, it’s nice to dream.

Jodorowsky’s ideas influenced iconic moments in several Hollywood sci-fi blockbusters Jeff Meyers that followed — everything from Alien’s mail@folioweekly.com

A&E // MOVIES

MAGIC LANTERNS

THE WESTERN AIN’T DEAD, SON

I

t’s been claimed that Mel Brooks killed the Western with his irreverent cowboy comedy Blazing Saddles. For whatever reason, ever since the ’70s, Westerns have largely disappeared from the big screen, only briefly resurrected now and then by Kevin Costner and Clint Eastwood, both of whom now seem disinclined to return to the genre that helped make their careers.

The good news is that the Western is far from dead, as witnessed by two terrific new films (both independently produced with lots of overseas backing) that recently surfaced on DVD after undeservedly short half-lives in the theaters. The first is Blackthorn (2011), starring Sam Shepard as an aging Butch Cassidy living his twilight years in Bolivia under the alias Mr. Blackthorn.

Preparing to saddle up for one last ride back to the States to see the son he never knew, Blackthorn is soon allied with a young robber (Eduardo Noriega) on the lam from a relentless posse, just like Butch and Sundance in the old days. They also cross paths with a nemesis from Butch’s past, an old Pinkerton agent (Stephen Rea) who has gone to seed in Bolivia.

Fueled by Shepard’s marvelous nuanced performance against spectacular location scenery in South America, Blackthorn (by turns lyrical and violent) is a nostalgic look back at not just a vanished era, but also the 1969 landmark film Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, to which the filmmakers make several subtle references, particularly in a closing shot that’s both a tribute and a fitting coda to the original. Playing the young Butch in the film’s flashbacks, by the way, is Nikolaj Coster-Waldau (Jaime Lannister in HBO’s Game of Thrones).

As good as it is, Blackthorn probably lost many potential viewers because of its nondescript title. The same might be true of Sweetwater, a 2013 kickass Western that also deserved a better fate than its limited theatrical run. Written and directed by Logan Miller, the film’s an unabashed revenge saga, eschewing the lyricism and thematic richness of Blackthorn but fully exploiting the frontier violence and heroism of the classic Western. January Jones (Betty Draper in Mad Men) plays a former prostitute, now married to a Mexican farmer (Noriega again), who comes into conflict with a truly diabolical villain (Jason Isaacs) who’s the epitome of evil in the guise of a hypocritical, sadistic prophet. Rounding out the protagonists is Ed Harris as a long-haired renegade sheriff who definitely walks (and dances, literally) to the beat of a different drum.

Imagine Abel Ferrara’s Ms. 45 in a dress on a horse as she dispenses justice to the scumbags. That’s Sweetwater. Jones makes a terrific avenging angel, Isaacs (Lucius Malfoy in the Harry Potter flicks) is deliciously vile, and, unlike his characters’ personalities in most of his roles, Harris is wonderfully kooky here.

Despite its more austere setting, Sweetwater (like Blackthorn) is also visually striking, a prerequisite for most of the classic Westerns. Genre fans should give both of these two newcomers a look.

Pat McLeod mail@folioweekly.com

DYSTOPIAN DETROIT, YAWN: Cynics are forgiven for thinking this film would have gone straight to DVD if not for Paul Walker’s death. In a dystopian Detroit (and with no RoboCop on the scene), the only hero around is undercover cop Damien Collier (Walker, right), who takes on drug kingpin Tremaine (RZA) in Brick Mansions.

**** ***@ **@@ *@@@

FILM RATINGS

CAMERON DIAZ JULIETTE LEWIS CARMEN ELECTRA ANNA NICOLE SMITH

OTHER FILMS

SUPER DUPER ALICE COOPER The “doc opera” – a blend of documentary archive footage, animation and rock opera – screens in area theaters on April 30. A prerecorded “Keep Calm & Just Ask Alice” Q&A and a greeting from the ol’ snakehandler himself are featured.

Check local listings.

SUN-RAY CINEMA Nymphomaniac Vol. 2 and Finding Vivian Maier continue their runs at Sun-Ray Cinema, 1028 Park St., 5 Points, 359-0049, sunraycinema.com. The TV series Cosmos screens at 9 p.m., and Mad Men at 10 p.m. every Sunday; check for updates.

Additional screenings listed below.

LATITUDE 30 MOVIES 300 Rise of an Empire is currently being screened at Latitude 30’s CineGrille Theater, 10370 Philips Highway, Southside, 365-5555, facebook.com/latitude30.

WORLD GOLF HALL OF FAME IMAX THEATER Island of Lemurs: Madagascar 3D, We the People, Jerusalem 3D, Great White Shark 3D and Born to Be Wild 3D are screened at World Golf Hall of Fame IMAX Theater, 1 World Golf Place, St. Augustine, worldgolfimax.com.

IRREPLACEABLE The first in a series of documentaries by Focus on the Family, about the concept of family as it’s viewed worldwide, is screened 7:30 p.m. May 6 at AMC Regency, AMC Orange Park, Cinemark Tinseltown and Regal Avenues Cinema. fathomevents.com

NOW SHOWING

2 STATES Not Rated Love is universal – and so is in-law trouble, apparently. In this Bollywood rom-com-dram, Krish (Arjun Kapoor) meets Ananya (Alia Bhatt) at college. They fall in love, much to the dismay of their families, who are cultural polar opposites. The couple is determined to prove to others it’s the real thing. In Hindi.

THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN 2 **@@ Rated PG-13 • Opens May 2 Reviewed in this issue.

BEARS Rated G John C. Reilly narrates this family film – a family of Alaskan brown bears, that is. Two cute cubs and their mother, awakened from hibernation, are ready to hit the wilds of Alaska to search for food. Reilly is a good choice for narrator, adding humor and just the right amount of respect as Mama teaches the kids all about a bear’s life.

BRICK MANSIONS Rated PG-13 The late Paul Walker stars as an undercover cop determined to set things right in this crime drama set in Detroit. Costars David Belle and RZA. CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER ***G Rated PG-13 Steve Rogers (Chris Evans), aka Captain America, hasn’t had time to cope with after-effects of one-way time travel, via cryonic sleep, from the 1940s to the 2010s, but he’s starting to face his disconnect. Costars Samuel L. Jackson, Scarlett Johansson and Cobie Smulders. And Stan Lee! DIVERGENT Rated PG-13 Beatrice Prior (Shailene Woodley) is labeled a Divergent, a group of misfits considered so dangerous that their destruction is being plotted. So she hooks up with another outcast – Four (Theo James), who’s really just one person.

Costars Kate Winslet, Ashley Judd and Zoe Kravitz.

DOM HEMINGWAY Rated R Jude Law plays ex-con Dom, a rough, vulgar yegg who’s just been released from the pen. A Russian mobster owes him money and he’s ready to collect. It’s interesting to see the usually suave Law portray such a crude slob so well.

DRAFT DAY Rated PG-13 Here in J-ville, we love Draft Day – every year, there’s a chance to get some awesome players added to our already awesome Jaguars roster. Dream on, River City. Costars Kevin Costner, Chadwick Boseman, Jennifer Garner, Deion Sanders, Aaron Goldhammer and Chris Berman.

FINDING VIVIAN MAIER ***@ Not Rated • Sun-Ray Cinema Vivian Maier was a photographer in the last half of the 20th century, but few knew it. She shot street scenes and people while also nannying for wealthy Chicago and New York City families. Her work was unearthed by the documentarian and historian John Maloof, the film’s co-director.

Goldblum, Harvey Keitel, Saoirse Ronan, Bill Murray, the adorable Bob Balaban, Adrien Brody, Willem Dafoe, Jason Schwartzman and Owen Wilson. The com-dram, about Gustave H (Ralph Fiennes), concierge of an elegant European hotel, is largely told by the 1960s version of lobby boy Zero Moustafa (F. Murray Abraham) about his time at the hotel and the madcap adventures he and Gustave had.

A HAUNTED HOUSE 2 Rated R The talented Marlon Wayans seems to be wasting those talents in this comedy-horror sequel, costarring Jaime Pressly, Essence Atkins, Cedric the Entertainer and Missi Pyle.

HEAVEN IS FOR REAL Rated PG Based on the bestselling book by Todd Burpo and Lynn Vincent, this true-life drama is about Todd, a regular man (Greg Kinnear) with a regular wife (Kelly Reilly) whose regular little son (Connor Corum) has a near-death experience and, after recovering, tells his folks what really happened while he was “gone.” Should Daddy go public with this or keep it on the down-low?

ISLAND OF LEMURS: MADAGASCAR Rated G Those kinda creepy, kinda cute lil critters with the googoo-googly eyes are highly endangered. Primatologist Dr. Patricia Wright is on a mission to keep them around.

The IMAX documentary is directed by David Douglas and written by Drew Fellman, with narration by who else but Morgan Freeman. If he can’t help these leapin’ lemurs, nobody can.

JODOROWSKY’S DUNE ***@ Rated PG-13 • Opens May 2 at Sun-Ray Cinema Reviewed in this issue.

FROM THE ROUGH Rated PG The biopic stars Taraji P. Hensen as Dr. Catana Starks, the first woman – first black woman, for that matter – to coach a men’s college golf team at Tennessee State. The late Michael Clarke Duncan costars.

JOE **@@ Rated R Extreme Texas macho is the theme here, as 15-year-old Gary (Tye Sheridan) is learning his lessons well. He doesn’t much like his daddy, Wade (Gary Poulter), a useless old drunk – that’s Gary’s description, and it’s too kind – but that hasn’t stopped him from internalizing unthinking reflexive violence as useful in many social situations. It’s sad and ironic that a better role model for him is Joe (Nicolas Cage), who’s on his way to being a useless old drunk but isn’t quite there. Can he straighten up and fly right for the sake of the boy? Costars Ronnie Gene Blevins, Adriene Mishler and Sue Rock.

GOD’S NOT DEAD Rated PG Josh Wheaton (Shane Harper) is a college student having trouble in philosophy class. Professor Radisson (Kevin Sorbo) doesn’t believe there is a God, shaking Josh’s faith. Costars Dean Cain and Willie Robertson.

THE LEGO MOVIE ***@ Rated PG Writers and directors Chris Miller and Phillip Lord’s popular, subversive animated feature about colorful toy bricks teaching life lessons costars the vocal talents of Jonah Hill, Channing Tatum, Will Arnett, Chris Pratt and Will Ferrell.

THE GRAND BUDAPEST HOTEL **G@ Rated R Director Wes Anderson guides a great ensemble in this, The Twee-est Story Ever Told, including Edward Norton, Jeff

MAKE YOUR MOVE Rated PG-13 It’s Romeo and Juliet tripping the light fantastic in another kids-dancing-like-their-lives-depend-on-it movie, except this

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A&E // MOVIES time, they do. Donny (Derek Hough) and Aya (BoA) are young hoofers in love, but doomed – their older brothers each run sketchy clubs where the competition is fierce.

MR. PEABODY & SHERMAN Rated PG We remember these guys from the Rocky and His Friends (which included Bullwinkle, who always had the wrong hat) TV cartoon series; Sherman was a human boy, adopted by a scholarly dog, Mr. Peabody. We especially miss the Wayback Machine, which we never knew was actually spelled WABAC. Huh. Costars the voices of Ty Burrell, Allison Janney and Stephen Colbert.

MUPPETS MOST WANTED ***@ Rated PG Kermit, Miss Piggy, Fozzie Bear, Gonzo, Scooter, Animal and Beaker are touring the globe. An evil Kermie look-alike is stealing jewelry in Europe, and our hero is suspected.

Tina Fey, Ricky Gervais and Ty Burrell costar in human form. Vocal talents include Steve Whitmire, Eric Jacobson, Dave Goelz, Bill Barretta, David Rudman and Matt Vogel.

There’s cameos: Sean Combs, Céline Dion, Lady Gaga, Zach Galifianakis, Josh Groban, Salma Hayek, Frank Langella, Ray Liotta, James McAvoy, Saoirse Ronan, Stanley Tucci ... waitasec ... Josh Groban?

NOAH Rated PG-13 Russell Crowe stars as the patriarch acutely aware of the weather – God has told him a great fl ood is coming and he’d better hightail it to the high seas with his family and a lot of animals if he wants to survive. Turns out he’s quite the fighter.

Costars Jennifer Connelly, Anthony Hopkins, Nick Nolte, Ray Winstone and Emma Watson.

OCULUS Rated R This horror movie, about a young woman trying to blame a murder on a supernatural being so her brother – who’s been convicted of the crime – gets out of jail, was filmed in Mobile, Ala. One scary goddamn place fersure.

THE OTHER WOMAN Rated PG-13 Is it just us, or is Cameron Diaz really a slut? A roué named Mark (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau) is married, has a girlfriend and has still another paramour in the wings. The women all meet and plot revenge. Boiled rabbit, anyone? Costars Leslie Mann, Kate Upton, Don Johnson (a role model for roués worldwide) and Nicki Minaj.

THE QUIET ONES **@@ Rated PG-13 In this British horror film, Jared Harris plays seedy-tweedy Professor Coupland, who’s experimenting with a cure for psychosis. AV geek Brian (Sam Claflin) is at Oxford to film Coupland’s efforts to make a sane woman out of Jane (Olivia Cooke). Is she a willing subject or a tortured soul?

RIO 2 Rated G City parrots (Jesse Eisenberg, Anne Hathaway) are dropped deep in the Amazonian jungle. The animated kids’ feature costars Andy Garcia, Jamie Foxx and Kristin Chenoweth.

TRANSCENDENCE **G@ Rated PG-13 The almost-sci-fi meditation on the dangers of technology and the megalomania of humanity stars Johnny Depp (don’t fret, Depputees; he wears weird makeup near the end). Costars Kate Mara, Rebecca Hall, Paul Bettany, Morgan Freeman.

UNDER THE SKIN **** Rated R Director Jonathan Glazer’s sci-fi-slash-horror film is about a beautiful woman (the now-ubiquitous Scarlett Johansson) who’s outta this world! The femme fatale roams the city streets and alleys seducing men – and then something bad happens, because men are never that lucky.

NEW ON DVD

THE LEGEND OF HERCULES Kellan Lutz stars in the story of Greek demigod Hercules who’s supposed to oust a bad king. He’s betrayed by his stepfather and sold into slavery. The guy wants to marry his true love, who’s betrothed to his brother, who’s really his half-brother … Anyway, sweaty, armored guys fight. Costars Gaia Weiss and Johnathan Schaech.

GIMME SHELTER In this drama, Vanessa Hudgens plays Agnes Bailey, pregnant and on the streets when her mother, and then her father, reject her. Thank God she meets some kind strangers along the way. Co-stars Rosario Dawson, Brendan Fraser and James Earl Jones.

DEVIL’S DUE It’s kind of like “Rosemary’s Baby,” in that a woman is pregnant with, apparently, the spawn of The Adversary himself. A young couple is on their honeymoon, but one night of the adventure is a blur for the bride. Who was that guy?

Co-stars Allison Miller, Zach Gilford, Sam Anderson and Robert No-he’s-my-uncle Belushi.

CONVICT UNINVITED: Frank (Josh Brolin), a man convicted of murder, invites himself into the home of single mother Adele (Kate Winslet) and her son, Henry (Gatlin Griffith), in Labor Day. The result is a surprising departure for director Jason Reitman (best known for Juno and Up in the Air. Unfortunately, the film – now on DVD – is florid but flavorless.

AREA THEATERS

AMELIA ISLAND Carmike 7, 1132 S. 14th St., Fernandina Beach, 261-9867 ARLINGTON & REGENCY AMC Regency 24, 9451 Regency Square Blvd., 264-3888 BAYMEADOWS & MANDARIN Regal Avenues 20, 9525 Philips Highway, 538-3889 BEACHES Regal Beach Blvd. 18, 14051 Beach Blvd., 992-4398 FIVE POINTS Sun-Ray Cinema@5Points, 1028 Park St., 359-0047 NORTHSIDE Regal River City, 12884 City Center Blvd., 757-9880

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ORANGE PARK AMC Orange Park 24, 1910 Wells Road, (888) AMC-4FUN Carmike 12, 1820 Town Center Blvd., Fleming Island, 621-0221 SAN MARCO San Marco Theatre, 1996 San Marco Blvd., 396-4845 SOUTHSIDE Cinegrille Theater, Latitude 30, 10370 Philips Hwy., 365-5555 Cinemark Tinseltown, 4535 Southside Blvd., 998-2122 ST. AUGUSTINE Epic Theatres, 112 Theatre Drive, 797-5757 IMAX Theater, World Golf Village, 940-IMAX

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A&E // ARTS PERFORMANCE

OTHER DESERT CITIES Brooke visits her Palm Springs parents after being gone six years, to tell them her revealing memoir is about to come out. Staged at 8 p.m. Thur.-Sat. and 2 p.m. Sun. May 1-11 on Limelight Theatre’s Matuza Main Stage, 11 Old Mission Ave., St. Augustine, $10-25, 825-1164, limelight-theatre.org.

THE ADDAMS FAMILY Artist Series presents this Broadway musical comedy somewhat based on The New Yorker’s beloved yet ghoulish cartoons by Charles Addams, at 8 p.m.

May 2 at the T-U Center, 300 W. Water St., Downtown, $32$102, 442-2929, artistseriesjax.org.

THE FOX ON THE FAIRWAY Golf club manager Henry runs a convoluted inter-club tournament; 8 p.m. May 2-17, 2 p.m.

May 4 and 11 at Players by the Sea, 106 N. Sixth St., Jax Beach, $20, 249-0289, playersbythesea.org.

T.O.M. ROCKS! For this Theatre on a MIssion fundraiser, kids perform rock & roll hits by ’80s and ’90s stars (Tom Petty, Styx, Journey) with a comedic storyline, to take a theater camp to Kenya, 7 p.m. May 4 at Theatre Jacksonville, 2032 San Marco Blvd., $15, 409-6019, theatrejax.com.

SOCIAL SECURITY An art gallery owner and her husband are visited by her mother; will she stay? Staged at 8 p.m.

May 7-June 8; 1:15 p.m. Sat., 2 p.m. Sun., at Alhambra Theatre & Dining, 12000 Beach Blvd., Southside, $38-$55, 641-1212, alhambrajax.com.

THE COLORED MUSEUM Museum exhibits express the African-American journey in George C. Wolfe’s satirical take on the experience, 7 p.m. May 9, 2 and 6 p.m. May 10 and 3 p.m. May 11 at Stage Aurora Performance Hall, 5188 Norwood Ave., Northside, $15-$25, 765-7372, stageaurora.org.

BAY AT THE MOON Atlantic Beach Experimental Theatre presents hometown success story Ian Mairs, here to direct his play about the ties that bind siblings and the boundaries set to maintain sanity. 8 p.m. May 9-25 (2 p.m. May 11, 18 and 25) at Adele Grage Cultural Center, 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, $15, 249-7177, abettheatre.com.

ALICE IN WONDERLAND Follow Alice and the White Rabbit down the rabbit hole in Lewis Carroll’s classic with a concert-style twist, 7:30 p.m. May 12 and 13 at Gamache Theatre, Flagler College’s Ringhaver Student Center, 50 Sevilla St., St. Augustine, $20, 829-5807, flagler.edu.

OLIVER! The British musical adaption of Charles Dickens’ classic story runs at 7:30 p.m. June 6-July 6 on Limelight Theatre’s Matuza Main Stage, 11 Old Mission Ave., St. Augustine, $25, 825-1164, limelight-theatre.org.

LES MISERABLES Imprisoned and exiled for stealing a loaf of bread, Jean Valjean evades capture from police inspector Javer as the French Revolution breaks in the classic French drama by Boublil and Schonberg, 8 p.m. June 6-21 at Theatre Jacksonville, 2032 San Marco Blvd., San Marco, $20-$25, 396-4425, theatrejax.com.

PIRATES OF PENZANCE When the hero of this comic opera was a boy, his father told his nurse to have him apprenticed as a pilot. She heard “pirate” – thus, the zany troubles begin.

8 p.m. June 6-29 at Orange Park Community Theatre, 2900 Moody Ave., $20, 276-2599, opct.org.

SHREK THE MUSICAL A nice ogre, a chatty donkey and a fiery princess set out on a fairy-tale adventure to save a swamp, 7:30 p.m. (weekend matinees) June 11-July 27 at Alhambra Theatre & Dining, 12000 Beach Blvd., Southside, $38-$55, 641-1212, alhambrajax.com.

THE FOREIGNER Charlie is a depressed Englishman at a Southern fishing lodge. He pretends he can’t speak English, so other lodgers speak freely in front of him. 8 p.m. June 12-28 at Amelia Community Theatre, 209 Cedar Street, Fernandina Beach, $10-$20, 261-6749, ameliacommunitytheatre.org.

COMEDY

CARL STRONG Strong’s Motown-inspired comedy includes impressions, singing and characters, 8 p.m. April 30-May 3 and 10 p.m. May 3 at The Comedy Zone, 3130 Hartley Rd., Mandarin, $8-$14, 292-4242, comedyzone.com.

BUBBA BRADLEY Downhome comedian Bradley is on at 8 p.m. May 2 and 3 at Latitude 30, 10370 Philips Highway, Southside, 365-5555.

BIL DWYER Game-show enthusiast Dwyer has been showcased on Comedy Central Presents, MTV and VH1.

He appears at 8:04 p.m. May 1-3 and 10:10 p.m. May 2 and 3 at Comedy Club of Jacksonville, 11000 Beach Blvd., Southside, 646-4277, $6-$25, jacksonvillecomedy.com.

ARIES SPEARS Best-known from the sketch comedy show Mad TV, Spears appears at 8 p.m. May 8-10, 10 p.m. May 9 and 10:06 May 10 at The Comedy Zone, 3130 Hartley Rd., Mandarin, $22-$27, 292-4242, comedyzone.com.

MICHAEL MALONE Malone has two top-10 comedy albums, and won the Seattle International Comedy Competition. He appears 8:04 p.m. May 8 and 10, 8:34 p.m. May 9 and 10:10 p.m. May 10 at Comedy Club of Jacksonville, 11000 Beach Blvd., Southside, 646-4277, $6-$25, jacksonvillecomedy.com.

MAD COWFORD IMPROV Weekly improv shows are held 8:15 p.m. every Fri. and Sat. at Northstar Substation, 119 E. Bay St., Downtown, $5, 233-2359, madcowford.com.

CALLS & WORKSHOPS

BEYOND THE CENSUS Learn how to use a variety of government records to discover your roots in this intermediate genealogy class, 1:30 p.m. April 30 at Main Library, 303 Laura St. N., free, 630-2409 to register.

PRAYERS FOR A TRANSFORMATION Sarah Crooks Flaire

30 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014

presents her final workshop as part of the mixed-media exhibit Transmigration, 11 a.m.-3 p.m. April 30 at the Museum of Science & History. Transmigration is held in conjunction with Green Revolution: Renewed, through May 4 at MOSH, 1025 Museum Circle, Southbank, admission: $8-$10, 396-6674, themosh.org.

IMPROVISATION FOR TEENS Atlantic Beach Experimental Theatre holds a workshop for kids in grades 9-12, 3 p.m. every Thur., May 1-June 5 at Adele Grage Cultural Center, 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, $160, 249-7177, abettheatre.com.

ST. AUGUSTINE YOUTH THEATRE The new theater opens its doors for the first time during Art Walk; learn about enrollment for summer camps and classes in the theater and gallery, 6 p.m. May 2 at 233 W. King St., free, 377-2524, facebook.com/staugustineyouththeatre.

COMIC CON AT THE BEACHES Jacksonville Public Library and Superhero Beach comic book shop host this Comic Con with local book artists Tim Dumas, James Greene, Josh Hoye, Ashley Lanni, Clay Mann, Seth Mann, Rachel Pandich, Michael Regina, Josh Rudloff, Josh Ulrich and Jim Ward. A 1966 series Batmobile is onsite. Activities include a costume contest, trivia and a screening of The Amazing Spider-Man, 11 a.m.-4 p.m. May 3 at 600 Third St., Neptune Beach, 241-1141, free (suggested donation of one non-perishable food item for Beaches Emergency Assistance Fund).

GREEN THUMB WORKSHOP Master gardeners from UF/ IFAS Extension Duval County give advice and tips on herb gardening, 10 a.m. May 3 at Mandarin Branch Library, 3330 Kori Rd., free, 262-5201, jaxpubliclibrary.org.

LOVE AT HIGH NOON LUNCHEON A meet-and-greet and lunch with acclaimed romance writer Brenda Jackson is held noon May 9 at Café Karibo, 27 N. Third St., Fernandina Beach, $20, 277-5269, cafekaribo.com. Seating is limited; purchase tickets from Fernandina Beach Library by May 5.

CALL TO ARTISTS The Art Center calls for art in any media depicting what makes Jacksonville “our town.” Deadline is May 7. Show runs May 8-July 8 at Art Center Premier Gallery, 50 N. Laura St., Downtown, 355-1757, tacjacksonville.org.

SAVE MORE AND SPEND LESS Clark Howard, a nationally syndicated consumer expert who specializes in helping consumers to save more, spend less and avoid getting ripped off, speaks at 6:30 p.m. May 8 at University of North Florida's University Center, 12000 Alumni Dr., Southside, free, 620-4200, unf.edu.

MOB FEST Marketing Our Businesses Fest, which allows an entrepreneur promote a product, service or program – charging the fee to the vendor – celebrates its one-year anniversary, 10 a.m. May 10 at E3 Center for Entrepreneur Development, 138 E. Duval St., Downtown, 525-2299, e3northflorida.org.

PORTRAIT PAINTING SESSION Live model portrait painting with Elbert Schubert, 10 a.m.-noon May 10 at The Art Center II, 229 N. Hogan St., Downtown, $5 for members, $10 for nonmembers; artists bring supplies.

FABRIC ART WITHOUT NEEDLE AND THREAD Learn how to add fabric to artwork without using a stitch; all supplies and equipment provided; 10 a.m. May 17 at TAC II, 229 N. Hogan St., Downtown, $30-$40, 355-1757, tacjacksonville.org.

AUDITIONS AT ACT Amelia Community Theatre auditions (roles for one man and six women) for The Foreigner, 4:30 p.m. May 17 at ACT’s Studio 209 Theatre, 209 Cedar St., Fernandina Beach, 261-6749, ameliacommunitytheatre.org.

SIMPLY NATURAL HAIR EXPO This natural hair and beauty expo highlights grassroots concepts of beauty and wellness, featuring exhibits of local entrepreneurs, beauty and wellness workshops and a Nubian fashion show, 11 a.m. May 18 at Jacksonville Marriott, 4760 Salisbury Rd., Southside, 733-0705, simplynaturalhairexpo.com.

CREATIVE DRAMA SUMMER CAMPS Atlantic Beach Experimental Theatre holds one-week and two-week ageappropriate camps, for grades 1-9, starting June 9, at Grage Cultural Center, 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, $160-$320, 249-7177, abettheatre.com.

NATURE & WILDLIFE EXHIBIT Works in any medium celebrating the beauty of the natural world are eligible – wilderness and landscape images, birds, marine life and outdoor creatures – for the fifth annual exhibit, held July 26Aug. 31 at St. Augustine Art Association. Submit up to three images online by June 2; $45, 824-2310, staaa.org.

ACTEEN STAGE LAB Children and teens in grades 6-12 learn street style and ambush theater at 6:30 p.m. every Wed. at Limelight Theatre, $80 per session, 825-1164, limelight-theatre.org.

CALL TO ARTISTS The Art Center seeks photographers and video artists to present slide shows or videos at Art Walk at its studios. Artists must have their own projection equipment. $25 fee. For details, email reidartlaw@gmail.com.

FIGURE DRAWING TAC II hosts figure-drawing sessions with a live model at 7 p.m. every Tue. (no session during the week of First Wednesday Art Walk) at TAC II, 229 N. Hogan St., Downtown, $5-$10, 355-1757, tacjacksonville.org.

CLASSICAL & JAZZ

THE ROCK TENORS Part of the Coffee series, the Jacksonville Symphony pays tribute to Paul McCartney, Sting, Don Henley, Freddie Mercury and more with guest artist Rob Evans, 11 a.m. May 2 and 3 at Jacoby Symphony Hall, 300 W. Water St., Downtown, $5-$10, 633-6110, jaxsymphony.org.

TUESDAY SERENADE Dr. Ken Trimmins and pianist Dr. Mimi Noda from ASU perform works by Eugene Bozza, Jacques Casterede and George Enescu. Dr. Noda also plays solo piano pieces by Chopin and Dohnanyi. 7 p.m. May 6 in Hicks

SAD CLOWN: Jan Miller’s Pierrot is among the pieces on display in the Florida Artist Group Juried Exhibit, opening May 2 during First Friday Art Walk and continuing through May. Auditorium, Main Library, 303 Laura St. N., free, 630-2665, jaxpubliclibrary.org.

RIVER CITY DULCIMERS The River City Dulcimers & Friends perform, featuring hammered dulcimers and acoustics, in a free concert at 6:30 p.m. May 7 at Main Library, 1895 Town Center Blvd., Fleming Island, 278-3722, facebook.com/ RiverCityDulcimers.

MAJOR-MINOR CONCERT This showcase features the JSYO’s top-tier ensembles, the Philharmonic and Repertory Orchestras, playing with their professional mentors in the Jacksonville Symphony Orchestra, 8 p.m. May 9 at 300 W. Water St., Downtown, $5-$10, 633-6110, jaxsymphony.org.

INTERMEZZO University of North Florida’s Dr. Gary Smart performs piano pieces by Mozart, Debussy and Prokofiev, followed by jazz improvisations from The Great American Songbook. Soprano Marilyn Smart joins her husband in song selections by Debussy and Gershwin. 3 p.m. May 11 in Hicks Auditorium, Main Library, 303 Laura St. N., free, 630-2665, jaxpubliclibrary.org.

GLADYS KNIGHT Knight, a seven-time Grammy-winner who’s scored No. 1 hits in pop, R&B and adult contemporary, appears 8 p.m. May 16 at the Times-Union Center’s Moran Theater, 300 W. Water St., Downtown, $59-$80, 633-6110, jaxsymphony.org.

FIESTA WITH ST. AUGUSTINE ORCHESTRA This spring concert features a program of Latin music as part of the week-long music celebration, Romanza Festivale of the Arts, at 8 p.m. May 16 at Lightner Museum, 25 Granada St., St. Augustine and 3 p.m. May 18 at Christ Episcopal Church, 400 San Juan Dr., Ponte Vedra Beach, $15, 655-7944, staugustineorchestra.org.

FABIO MECHETTI’S FINALE Mahler’s Symphony No. 3 is the final concert with Mechetti on the podium as music director.

Mahler’s longest piece is performed in its entirety without intermission, 8 p.m. May 16 and 17 in Jacoby Symphony Hall, 300 W. Water St., Downtown, $25-$59, 633-6110, jaxsymphony.org.

SPRING CONCERT Orange Park United Methodist Church’s Hand Bell Choir performs a spring concert, 6:30 p.m. May 19 at the Main Library, 1895 Town Center Blvd., Fleming Island, free, 278-3722, darlene.page@claycountygov.com.

CONCERT ON THE GREEN The 27th annual concert by the Jacksonville Symphony Orchestra includes Tchaikovsky’s 1812 Overture and patriotic and American favorites, 8 p.m. May 25 at Magnolia Point Golf & Country Club, 3670

Clubhouse Dr., Green Cove Springs, $12-$15 or $75 for dinner package, 278-8448, concertonthegreen.com.

KELLY/SCOTT JAZZ SEXTET Northeast Florida jazz sextet, led by vocalist Lisa Kelly and trumpet/flugelhorn player JB Scott, performs 11 a.m. and 7:30 p.m. May 30 at Friday Musicale, 645 Oak St., Riverside, 355-7584, fridaymusicale.com.

CHICAGO The American jazz/rock band opens Starry Nights series with the Jacksonville Symphony Orchestra, 6 p.m. May 31 at Metropolitan Park, 1410 Gator Bowl Blvd., Downtown, $84, 354-5547, jaxsymphony.org.

CHRISTOPHER CROSS Five-time Grammy-winning singersongwriter, accompanied by the Jacksonville Symphony Orchestra, appears at 6 p.m. June 6 at Metropolitan Park, 1410 Gator Bowl Blvd., Downtown, $84, 354-5547, jaxsymphony.org.

JAZZ IN PONTE VEDRA The Gary Starling Group (Carol Sheehan, Billy Thornton, Peter Miles) performs 7:30-10:30 p.m. every Thur. at Table 1, 330 A1A N., 280-5515.

JAZZ IN RIVERSIDE Trumpeter Ray Callendar and guitarist Taylor Roberts are featured at 9:30 p.m. every Thur. at Kickbacks Gastropub, 910 King St., 388-9551.

JAZZ IN MANDARIN Boril Ivanov Trio plays at 7 p.m. every Thur. and pianist David Gum plays at 7 p.m. every Fri. at Tree Steakhouse, 11362 San Jose Blvd., 262-0006.

JAX BEACH JAZZ Live jazz is presented 6-9 p.m. every Fri. at Landshark Café, 1728 Third St. N., 246-6024.

JAZZ IN NEPTUNE BEACH Live jazz is featured 7:30-9:30 p.m. every Sat. at Lillie’s Coffee Bar, 200 First St., 249-2922.

JAZZ IN ST. AUGUSTINE The House Cats play 9:30 p.m.-1 a.m. every Sat. at Stogies Club & Listening Room, 36 Charlotte St., 826-4008.

JAZZ IN ARLINGTON Jazzland Café features live music at 8 p.m. every Sat. and 6-9 p.m. every Tue. at 1324 University Blvd. N., 240-1009, jazzlandcafe.com.

JAZZ IN ST. AUGUSTINE Live jazz is featured nightly at Rhett’s Piano Bar & Brasserie, 66 Hypolita St., 825-0502.

ART WALKS, FESTIVALS & MARKETS

FIRST FRIDAY ART WALK The tour of Art Galleries of St. Augustine is held May 2 and every first Fri., with more than 15 galleries participating, 829-0065.

DOWNTOWN FRIDAY MARKET Arts & crafts and local

A&E // ARTS produce, 10 a.m.-2 p.m. May 2 and every Fri. at Jacksonville Landing, 2 Independent Dr., Downtown, 353-1188.

ST. AUGUSTINE CHALK WALK Professional chalk artists and regular folks turn 4x6 sections of the city’s sidewalks into an art gallery with the theme of St. Augustine’s Living Heritage, 10 a.m. May 3 at the promenade between City Parking Garage and Visitor Information Center, 10 W. Castillo Dr., free, 501-6100, staugustinechalkwalk.com. A pre-event party is held 5:30 p.m. May 2 at Visitors Information Center.

RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET La Caroline, FSCJ Dance Works, Jacksonville Dance Theatre, local and regional art, food artists and a farmers market are featured, 10 a.m.-4 p.m.

May 3 under the Fuller Warren Bridge, 715 Riverside Ave., free admission, 389-2449 , riversideartsmarket.com.

FIRST WEDNESDAY ART WALK An art walk, featuring more than 50 galleries, museums and businesses and spanning 15 blocks, is held 5-9 p.m. May 7 and every first Wed., Downtown. May’s theme “Downtown is on Fire” includes a commemoration to the 1901 Great Fire and Jacksonville history, with blacksmiths and Jacksonville University’s glassblowing students in Hemming Plaza. Local artist Mark Zimmerman creates an interactive memorial to the 1901 fire.

Jax2025 hosts a celebration onstage. downtownjacksonville. org/marketing; iloveartwalk.com ARTRAGEOUS ART WALK Downtown Fernandina Beach galleries are open for self-guided tours, 5:30-8:30 p.m. May 10 and every second Sat., 277-0717, ameliaisland.com.

JAX BEACH ART WALK More than 30 local artists display works, 5-9 p.m. May 13 and every second Tue., along First Street between Beach Boulevard and Fifth Avenue North, Jax Beach, betterjaxbeach.com/jax-beach-art-walk.html.

NORTH BEACHES ART WALK Galleries of Atlantic and Neptune beaches are open 5-9 p.m. May 15 and every third Thur. from Sailfish Drive in Atlantic Beach to Neptune Beach and Town Center, 249-2222, nbaw.org.

MUSEUMS

ALEXANDER BREST MUSEUM & GALLERY Jacksonville University, 2800 University Blvd. N., Arlington, 256-7371, arts.ju.edu. Senior thesis artwork includes 2-D art, sculptures, animated shorts, screenplays and film productions, on display through April 30. The permanent collection features carved ivory, Chinese porcelain, pre-Colombian artifacts and more.

AMELIA ISLAND MUSEUM OF HISTORY 233 S. Third St., Fernandina Beach, 261-7378, ameliamuseum.org. The exhibit Beaches, Creatures and Cowboys features posters and lobby cards from Florida films, on display through April. The children’s exhibit Discovery Ship allows kids to pilot the ship, hoist flags and learn about the history of Fernandina’s harbor.

BEACHES MUSEUM & HISTORY PARK 381 Beach Blvd., Jax Beach, 241-5657, beachesmuseum.org. The exhibit Waiting for the Train: Henry Flagler & the Florida East Coast Railroad is on display through June 1.

CRISP-ELLERT ART MUSEUM 48 Sevilla St., St. Augustine, 826-8530, flagler.edu/crispellert. Flagler College’s graduating BFA and BA candidates from the Department of Art and Design exhibit their work during a reception, 5-9 p.m. May 1. The exhibit is on display 10 a.m.-4 p.m. and 5-9 p.m. (during First Friday Art Walk) May 2 and 11 a.m.-2 p.m May 3.

CUMMER MUSEUM OF ART & GARDENS 829 Riverside Ave., Riverside, 356-6857, cummer.org. Art collectors share the pieces that inspired their love of collecting in the exhibit Collector’s Choice: Inside the Hearts and Minds of Regional Collectors, which is on display May 17-Sept. 14. FSU Professor William Walmsley displays his works through July 8. The Human Figure: Sculptures by Enzo Torcoletti is on display through September. A Commemoration of the Civil Rights Movement: Photography from the High Museum of Art is on display through Nov. 2.

KARPELES MANUSCRIPT MUSEUM 101 W. First St., Springfield, 356-2992, rain.org. The permanent collection includes other rare manuscripts.

MANDARIN MUSEUM & HISTORICAL SOCIETY 11964 Mandarin Rd., 268-0784, mandarinmuseum.net. The exhibit The Maple Leaf, which features artifacts and information from the Civil War era, runs through December.

MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART JACKSONVILLE 333 N. Laura St., Downtown, 366-6911, mocajacksonville.com.

Leigh Murphy's exhibit Observing Objects, an exploration of watercolor, runs through May 11. Shaun Thurston’s Project Atrium: One Spark runs through June 6. Students from MOCA’s educational outreach program, Rainbow Artists: Art and Autism display their work through June 1. The exhibit New York Times Magazine Photographs, curated by Kathy Ryan and Lesley Martin, runs through Aug. 24.

MUSEUM OF SCIENCE & HISTORY 1025 Museum Circle, Southbank, 396-6674, themosh.org. Uncovering the Past: Archaeological Discoveries of North Florida, through August. The mixed-media exhibit Transmigration is held in conjunction with Green Revolution: Renewed, through May 4.

VISITOR INFORMATION CENTER 10 W. Castillo Dr., St. Augustine, 825-1000, staugustine-450.com/journey.

Journey: 450 years of the African-American Experience is exhibited through July 15.

GALLERIES

ABSOLUTE AMERICANA ART GALLERY 77 Bridge St., St. Augustine, 824-5545, absoluteamericana.com.

Original Pierre Matisse prints are featured. The permanent

display features oil paintings, sculptures and prints from international artists.

AMIRO ART & FOUND GALLERY 9C Aviles St., St. Augustine, 824-8460, amiroartandfound.com. Jan Tomlinson’s Mirror, Mirror, featuring vintage etched mirrors, runs through April.

THE ART CENTER MAIN GALLERY 31 W. Adams St., Downtown, 355-1757, tacjacksonville.org. Paintings, pastels, sketches and photography by a diverse group of member artists are displayed.

THE ART CENTER PREMIER GALLERY 50 N. Laura St., Downtown, 355-1757, tacjacksonville.org. The Woods exhibit, featuring artwork using wood to depict forests and trees, runs through May 6. The show Wood – Depictions and Transformations runs through May 7.

BUTTERFIELD GARAGE ART GALLERY 137 King St., St. Augustine, 825-4577, butterfieldgarage.com. A collection of works by junior and senior Flagler students is on display through April. The artist-run gallery features a wide range of traditional and contemporary works by several local artists.

THE CULTURAL CENTER AT PONTE VEDRA BEACH 50 Executive Way, 280-0614, ccpvb.org. Beyond the Beaten Path, featuring David Ponsler’s sculptures and George Wilson’s photography, runs through May 9. Jacksonville Coalition for the Visual Arts Spring Show runs through May 9.

FIRST STREET GALLERY 216-B First St., Neptune Beach, 241-6928, firststreetgalleryart.com. Joan Carver – who specializes in watercolor, pastels and oils – opens the exhibit Color It Coastal which runs through May 20.

FLORIDA MINING GALLERY 5300 Shad Rd., Southside, 425-2845, floridamininggallery.com. Craig Drennen’s exhibit Awful & Others, featuring works based on William Shakespeare’s play Timon of Athens, is on display through May 2. Permanent display features a wide range of contemporary works by emerging artists.

GALLERY725 725 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 5, Atlantic Beach, 345-9320, gallery725.com. Water. Fire. Wood features works

by Tonsenia Yann, Ken Daga, Matthew Winghart, Linda Olsen and Flew, through May 17. Winghart’s Wall Candy features contemporary art that celebrates humor and nostalgia. The exhibit continues through May 3. Works and hand-crafted gifts by local artists are featured, along with a selection of national and international works.

PROMISE BENEFIT THE GALLERY AT HOUSE OF STEREO 8780 OF Perimeter Park Ct., Ste. 100, Southside, 642-6677, houseofstereo.com.

Painting, art glass, photography, woodcrafts, pottery and sculpture are featured.

GEORGIA NICK GALLERY 11A Aviles St., St. Augustine, 806-3348, georgianickgallery.com. The artist-owned studio displays Nick’s sea and landscape photography, along with local works by oil painters, a mosaic artist, potter, photographer and author.

HASKELL GALLERY & DISPLAY CASES Jacksonville International Airport, 14201 Pecan Park Rd., Northside, 741-3546. Keith Doles’ Street Series and Street Corners is displayed through June 29 in Haskell Gallery located before security. Dorian Eng’s Chinese and Japanese art in the form of threaded balls and thimbles called Temari and Yubinuki is displayed through July 7 in Connector Bridge Art display case before security. Marsha Glaziere’s Eclectic Coffee Spots in Puget Sound is a collection of paintings, photographs and impressions, displayed through July 5 in Concourse A and C display cases after security.

HIGHWAY GALLERY floridamininggallery.com. Nine artists – Nathaniel Artkart Price, Ken Daga, Ashley C. Waldvogel, Brianna Angelakis, Christina Foard, Linda Olsen, Sara Pedigo, Zach Fitchner and Russell Maycumber – are featured on digital billboards throughout the city in collaboration with Clear Channel through July.

THE LOOKING LAB 107 E. Bay St., Downtown, 917-2393772. Art in Empty Store Fronts features multimedia video art and sculptures by Crystal Floyd and David Montgomery.

LUFRANO INTERCULTURAL GALLERY University of North Florida, 1 UNF Dr., Student Union Bldg. 58E, Ste. 2401, Southside, 620-2475. The 2014 Art & Design Senior Exhibition is on display through May 2.

PLANTATION ARTISTS’ GUILD & GALLERY 94 Amelia Village Circle, Amelia Island, 432-1750, artamelia.com. Paintings by Edibeth Farrington are on display through May 10.

REDDI ARTS 1037 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, 398-3161, reddiarts.com. Works by local artists are featured, with a focus on “emerging artists for emerging collectors.”

Collections change monthly.

ST. AUGUSTINE ART ASSOCIATION 22 Marine St., 824-2310, staaa.org. The Florida Artist Group (FLAG) opens its annual juried exhibit at First Friday Art Walk, 5-9 p.m.

May 2. The exhibit remains open through May. SOUTHLIGHT GALLERY 201 N. Hogan St., Ste. 100, Downtown, 553-6361, southlightgallery.com. Light Sensitive V, a UNF photography portfolio exhibition, continues through April. space:eight GALLERY 228 W. King St., St. Augustine, 829-2838, spaceeight.com. This funky gallery features lowbrow, pop surrealism, street and underground art by nationally and internationally acclaimed artists.

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APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 31

Sales Rep

DINING DIRECTORY To have your restaurant listed, contact your account manager or Sam Taylor, 904.260.9770 ext. 111 staylor@folioweekly.com DINING DIRECTORY KEY

Average Entrée Cost: $ = Less than $8 $$ = $8-$14 $$$ = $15-$22 $$$$ = $23 & up BW = Beer/Wine FB = Full Bar K = Kids’ Menu TO = Take Out B = Breakfast R = Brunch L = Lunch D = Dinner *Bite Club certified = Hosted a free Folio Weekly Bite Club tasting. Join at fwbiteclub.com.

BOJ = 2013 Best of Jax winner F = FW distribution spot

AMELIA ISLAND, FERNANDINA BEACH, YULEE

29 SOUTH EATS, 29 S. Third St., 277-7919. F In historic downtown, the popular bistro’s Chef Scotty Schwartz serves traditional world cuisine with a modern twist. $$ L Tue.-Sat.; D Mon.-Sat.; R Sun. BRETT’S WATERWAY CAFÉ, 1 S. Front St., 261-2660. F Southern hospitality in an upscale waterfront spot; daily specials, fresh local seafood, aged beef. $$$ FB K L D Daily CAFÉ KARIBO, 27 N. Third St., 277-5269. F In a historic building, family-owned spot serves worldly taste fare: homemade veggie burgers, fresh seafood, made-fromscratch desserts. Dine in or on oak-shaded patio. Karibrew Pub offers beer brewed onsite. $$ FB K TO R, Sun.; L D Daily CIAO ITALIAN BISTRO, 302 Centre St., 206-4311. Owners Luke and Kim Misciasci offer fine dining: veal piccata, rigatoni Bolognese, antipasto; house specialties are chicken Ciao, homemade-style meat lasagna. $ L Fri. & Sat.; D Nightly DAVID’S RESTAURANT & LOUNGE, 802 Ash St., 310-6049.

In Historic District. Fresh seafood, prime aged meats, rack of lamb served in an elegant, chic spot. $$$$ FB D Nightly DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 474313 E. S.R. 200, 491-3469.

450077 S.R. 200, Callahan, 879-0993. BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily JACK & DIANE’S, 708 Centre St., 321-1444. F In a renovated 1887 shotgun house. Favorites: jambalaya, French toast, mac-n-cheese, vegan, vegetarian selections.

Dine inside or on the porch. $$ FB K B L D Daily LULU’S AT THE THOMPSON HOUSE, 11 S. Seventh St., 432-8394. F Creative lunch: po’boys, salads, little plates served in a historic house. Dinner: fresh local seafood, Fernandina shrimp. Reservations recommended. $$$ BW K TO R Sun.; L D Tue.-Sat. MOON RIVER PIZZA, 925 S. 14th St., 321-3400. F BOJ winner. Northern-style pizzas, with more than 20 toppings, are served by the pie or the slice. $ BW TO L D Mon.-Sat. THE MUSTARD SEED CAFE, 833 TJ Courson Rd., 277-3141.

Awarded Snail of Approval. Casual organic eatery and juice bar, in Nassau Health Foods. All-natural organic items, smoothies, juice, coffee, herbal tea. $$ TO B L Mon.-Sat. THE PECAN ROLL BAKERY, 122 S. Eighth St., 491-9815.

Sweet and savory pastries, cookies, cakes and breads.

Everything’s made from scratch. $ TO B L Wed.-Sun. PLAE, 80 Amelia Village Cir., 277-2132. Bite Club certified. Omni Amelia Island Plantation Spa & Shops.

Bistro-style venue has an innovative menu: whole fried fish and duck breast. Outdoor dining. $$$ FB D Mon.-Sat. SALTY PELICAN BAR & GRILL, 12 N. Front St., 277-3811.

F See ICW sunsets from second-story outdoor bar. Owners T.J. and Al offer local seafood, Mayport shrimp, fish tacos, po’boys, original broiled cheese oysters. $$ FB K L D Daily SLIDERS SEASIDE GRILL, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-6652.

F BOJ. Oceanfront place serves award-winning handmade crab cakes, fresh seafood, fried pickles. Outdoor dining, open-air 2nd fl oor, balcony. $$ FB K L D Daily T-RAY’S BURGER STATION, 202 S. 8th St., 261-6310.

F This spot in an old gas station offers blue plate specials, burgers, biscuits & gravy, shrimp. $ BW TO B L Mon.-Sat.

ARLINGTON, REGENCY

DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 9119 Merrill Rd., Ste. 19 & 20, 745-9301. BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 8818 Atlantic Blvd., 720-0106. See Mandarin. $$ FB K TO L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1301 Monument Rd., Ste. 5, 724-5802. F See Orange Park. $ K TO B L D Daily

AVONDALE, ORTEGA

THE CASBAH CAFÉ, 3628 St. Johns Ave., 981-9966. F BOJ winner. Middle Eastern/Mediterranean fare. Patio, hookah lounge. Wi-Fi, bellydancers. $$ BW L D Daily CLAUDE’S CHOCOLATES, 3543 St. Johns Ave., 829-5790.

F In Green Man Gourmet, this shop has wines, spices, fresh fruit ice pops and Belgian chocolates. See Ponte Vedra. $$ TO ESPETO BRAZILIAN STEAK HOUSE, 4000 St. Johns Ave., Ste. 40, 388-4884. F Churrascaria gauchos carve the meat onto your plate from serving tables. $$$ FB D Tue.-Sun. THE FOX RESTAURANT, 3580 St. Johns Ave., 387-2669.

F Owners Ian & Mary Chase offer fresh diner fare: burgers, meatloaf, fried green tomatoes, desserts. Breakfast all day.

Local landmark for 50+ years. $$ BW K L D Daily LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 4530 St. Johns Ave., 388-8828. F See Mandarin. $$ FB K TO L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 3611 St. Johns

32 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014

Ave., 388-0200. F Bite Club certified. BOJ winner.

See Beaches. $ BW K TO L D Daily MOJO NO. 4 URBAN BBQ & WHISKEY BAR, 3572 St. Johns Ave., 381-6670. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $$ FB K TO L D Daily PINEGROVE MARKET & DELI, 1511 Pinegrove Ave., 389-8655. F BOJ winner. For 40+ years serving hearty fare: Cuban sandwiches, burgers, subs, wraps, homemade chicken salad, in a family spot. Onsite butcher shop cuts USDA choice prime aged beef. Craft beers. $ BW TO B L D Mon.-Sat. SIMPLY SARA’S, 2902 Corinthian Ave., Ortega, 3871000. F Down-home cooking from scratch: eggplant fries, pimento cheese, baked chicken, fruit cobblers, chicken & dumplings, desserts. BYOB. $$ K TO L D Mon.-Sat., B Sat.

BAYMEADOWS

AL’S PIZZA, 8060 Philips Hwy., Ste. 105, 731-4300. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ FB K TO L D Daily BROADWAY RISTORANTE & PIZZERIA, Ste. 3, 10920 Baymeadows Rd. E., 519-8000. F Family-owned-andoperated Italian pizzeria serves calzones, strombolis, wings, brick-oven-baked pizza, subs, desserts. Delivery. $$ BW K TO L D Daily INDIA’S RESTAURANT, 9802 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 8, 620-0777. F Authentic Indian cuisine, lunch buffet.

Curries, vegetable dishes, lamb, chicken, shrimp, fish tandoori. $$ BW L Mon.-Sat.; D Nightly LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 8206 Philips Hwy., Baymeadows Junction, 732-9433. F See Mandarin. $$ FB K TO L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 3928 Baymeadows Rd., 7377740. 8616 Baymeadows Rd., 739-2498. F See Orange Park. $ K TO B L D Daily PIZZA PALACE RESTAURANT & PIZZERIA, 3928 Baymeadows Rd., 527-8649. F Relaxed, family-owned place serves homestyle cuisine. Local faves include spinach pizza, chicken spinach calzones, ravioli, lasagna, parmigiana. Outside dining; HD TVs. $$ BW K TO L D Daily SNEAKERS SPORTS GRILLE, 8133 Point Meadows Dr., 519-0509. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ FB K L D Daily ZESTY INDIA, 8358 Point Meadows Dr., 329-3676. Chefs combine Asian methodology with European template t o create dishes like tandoori lamb chops and rosemary tikka.

Vegetarian items are cooked separately in vegetable oil. $ BW TO L D Tue.-Sun.

BEACHES

(Locations are Jax Beach unless otherwise noted.)

AL’S PIZZA, 303 Atlantic Blvd., Beaches Town Ctr., Atlantic Beach, 249-0002. F BOJ winner. Celebrating more than 20 years, Al’s is a repeat Best Pizza winner in the annual BOJ readers’ poll. New York-style and gourmet pizzas. All-day happy hour Mon.-Thur. $ FB K TO L D Daily BREEZY COFFEE SHOP CAFE, 235 Eighth Ave. S., 241-2211.

F Casual, family-owned shop serves fresh-baked goods, espressos, locally roasted coffees, vegan and gluten-free options. Sandwiches, local beer. $ BW K TO B R L Daily BUDDHA THAI BISTRO, 301 10th Ave. N., 712-4444. The proprietors are from Thailand; every dish is made with fresh ingredients, beautifully presented. $$ FB TO L D Daily CASA MARIA, 2429 S. Third St., 372-9000. F Familyowned-and-operated place offers authentic Mexican fare: fajitas and seafood dishes, hot sauces made in-house. The specialty is tacos de asada. $ FB K L D Daily CRUISERS GRILL, 319 23rd Ave. S., 270-0356. F BOJ winner. Locally owned and operated for 15+ years, this casual place serves half-pound burgers, fish sandwiches, award-winning cheddar fries and sangria. $ BW K L D Daily ENGINE 15 BREWING CO., 1500 Beach Blvd., Ste. 217, 249-2337. F BOJ winner. Gastropub fare: soups, flatbreads, sandwiches, including BarBe-Cuban and beer dip.

Craft beers and brew groups. $ FB K L Tue.-Sun.; D Nightly FLYING IGUANA TAQUERIA & TEQUILA BAR, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 853-5680. F Fusion of Latin American and Southwestern-influenced fare: tacos, seafood, carnitas, Cubana sandwiches. 100+ tequilas.

Outdoor seating. $ FB L D Daily LANDSHARK CAFE, 1728 Third St. N., 246-6024. F Locally owned & operated. Fresh, off-the-boat local seafood, fish tacos, houseground burgers, wings, handcut fries, tater tots; daily specials. $$ FB K L D Daily; R Sun. LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 1222 Third St. S., 372-4495. F See Mandarin. $$ FB TO L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 657 N. Third St., 247-9620.

F See Orange Park. $ K TO B L D Daily LILLIE’S COFFEE BAR, 200 First St., Beaches Town Ctr., Neptune Beach, 249-2922. F Locally roasted coffee, eggs, bagels, fl atbreads, sandwiches, desserts. Dine indoors or out, patio and courtyard. $$ BW TO B L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 1018 Third St. N., Ste. 2, 241-5600. F Bite Club. BOJ winner. Hoagies, salads, gourmet pizzas: Mighty Meaty, vegetarian, Kosmic Karma. 35 tap beers. Nonstop happy hour. $ BW K TO L D Daily METRO DINER, 1534 Third St. N., 853-6817. F BOJ winner. See San Marco. $$ R B L Daily MEZZA RESTAURANT & BAR, 110 First St., Beaches Town Ctr., Neptune Beach, 249-5573. F Near-the-ocean eatery, 20+ years. Casual bistro fare: gourmet wood-fired pizzas, nightly specials. Dine inside or on the patio. Valet parking. $$$ FB K D Mon.-Sat.

Barney Barnhart, Kristi Malone, Brittany Dinneen, Candy Cake, Victoria Beuther and Libby Bach of Taps Bar & Grill in St. Johns showcase their signature dishes: bangin’ shrimp, baja tacos, buffalo chicken salad, homemade-style potato leek soup (soups are always made from scratch) and the ahi poke plate. Photo: Dennis Ho MOJO KITCHEN BBQ PIT & BLUES BAR, 1500 Beach Blvd., 247-6636. F BOJ winner. Funky Southern blues kitchen. Pulled pork, Carolina-style barbecue, Delta fried catfish, all the sides. $$ FB K TO L D Daily M SHACK, 299 Atlantic Blvd., Beaches Town Ctr., Atlantic Beach, 241-2599. F BOJ winner. David and Matthew Medure fl ippin’ burgers, hot dogs, fries, shakes, familiar fare, moderate prices. Dine inside or outside. $$ BW L D Daily POE’S TAVERN, 363 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 241-7637. F American gastropub named for the poet. 50+ beers, gourmet burgers, handcut fries, fish tacos, Edgar’s Drunken Chili, daily fish sandwich special. $$ FB K L D Daily RAGTIME TAVERN & SEAFOOD GRILL, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Beaches Town Ctr., Atlantic Beach, 241-7877. F For 30 years, popular seafood place has scored many awards in our BOJ readers poll. Blackened snapper, sesame tuna, Ragtime shrimp. Daily happy hour. $$ FB L D Daily SLIDERS SEAFOOD GRILLE & OYSTER BAR, 218 First St., Beaches Town Ctr., Neptune Beach, 246-0881. Beachcasual atmosphere. Customer faves: fish tacos, gumbo.

Key lime pie, homemade ice cream sandwiches. $$ FB K L Sat. & Sun.; D Nightly SNEAKERS SPORTS GRILLE, 111 Beach Blvd., 482-1000.

F BOJ winner. Full-service bar (with more than 20 beers on tap), TV screens covering entire walls and cheerleader s serving the food. Happy hour Mon.-Fri. $ FB K L D Daily

DOWNTOWN

AKEL’S DELICATESSEN, 21 W. Church St., 665-7324. F New York-style deli offers freshly made fare: subs (3 Wise Guys, Champ), burgers, gyros, breakfast bowls, ranchero wrap, vegetarian dishes. $ K TO B L Mon.-Fri. AMERICAN GRILL, Jacksonville Landing, 353-7522. Fullservice restaurant serves traditional fare: pot pies, steaks, burgers, pizza, pot roast, vegetarian dishes. $$ BW L D Daily BENNY’S STEAK & SEAFOOD, Jax Landing, Ste. 175, 301-1014. This steak-and-seafood house serves Continental cuisine with such signature dishes as the Filet Christian. $$$ FB K L D Daily CAFÉ NOLA at MOCAJax, 333 N. Laura St., 366-6911. F Shrimp & grits, gourmet sandwiches, fresh fish tacos, homemade desserts. $$ FB L Mon.-Fri.; D Thur. & ArtWalk CASA DORA, 108 E. Forsyth St., 356-8282. F Chef Sam Hamidi has been serving genuine Italian fare for 36+ years: veal, seafood, gourmet pizza. The homemade salad dressing is a specialty. $$ BW K L Mon.-Fri.; D Mon.-Sat. CASA MARIA, 12961 N. Main St., Ste. 104, 757-6411. F See Beaches. $ FB K L D Daily CHICAGO PIZZA & SPORTS GRILL, Jax Landing, 354-7747.

F Chicago-style deep-dish pizzas, hot dogs, Italian beef dishes from Chicago’s Comastro family. $$ FB K TO L D Daily CHOMP CHOMP, 106 E. Adams St., 762-4667. F Eats at moderate prices – most less than $10. Chef-inspired street food: panko-crusted chicken, burgers, chinois tacos, bahn mi and barbecue. $ L Tue.-Sat.; D Fri. & Sat. CINCO DE MAYO, Jax Landing, 329-2892. Authentic yet mild dishes: fajitas, tacos, burritos, enchiladas. Din e indoors or outside. $$ FB L D Daily FIONN MacCOOL’S IRISH PUB & RESTAURANT, Jax Landing, Ste. 176, 374-1547. BOJ winner. This pub offers casual dining with an uptown Irish atmosphere, serving fi sh and chips, Guinness lamb stew and black-andtan brownies. $$ FB K L D Daily HOOTERS, Jax Landing, Ste. 103, 356-5400. The chain, popular for its waitresses, features wings, steamed shrimp, oysters, burgers, seafood, sandwiches. $$ FB TO L D Daily KOJA SUSHI, Ste. 222, Jax Landing, 350-9911. F BOJ winner. Owners John and Tony, in the sushi game for 10+ years, offer sushi, sashimi, and Japanese, Asian, Korean cuisine. Hard-to-find items like baby octopus salad, too.

Dine inside or out. $$ FB L Mon.-Fri.; D Nightly VILLAGE BREAD CAFE, Ste. 175, Jax Landing, 683-7244.

Locally owned; bagels, omelets, sandwiches on homestyle

bread, salads, pizzas, pastries. $ TO B L Mon.-Sat. VITO’S ITALIAN CAFE, Jax Landing, Ste. 174, 355-3002.

Traditional Italian and Mediterranean menu: pasta, steak and seafood entrées. Desserts, including tiramisu and cannoli, are homemade. Daily happy hour. $ FB L D Daily ZODIAC GRILL, 120 W. Adams St., 354-8283. American favorites and Mediterranean fare in a casual atmosphere; panini, vegetarian dishes. Daily lunch buffet. Espressos, hookahs. Happy hour Mon.-Fri. $ FB L Mon.-Fri

FLEMING ISLAND

GRASSROOTS NATURAL MARKET, 1915 East-West Pkwy., 541-0009. F BOJ winner. See Riverside. $ BW TO Daily LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 1571 C.R. 220, Ste. 100, 215-2223. F See Mandarin. $$ FB TO L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 1800 Town Center Blvd., 541-1999. F Bite Club certified. BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ BW K TO L D Daily MOJO SMOKEHOUSE, 1810 Town Center Blvd., Ste. 8, 264-0636. F BOJ. See Beaches. $$ FB K TO L D Daily TAPS BAR & GRILL, 1605 C.R. 220, 278-9421. F 50+ premium tap domestic, imported beers. Starters, burgers, sandwiches, entrées, made to order with fresh ingredients.

Lots of TVs for watching sports. $$ FB K L D Daily WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198. F Real fish camp serves gator tail, freshwater river catfish, daily specials, traditional meals, on Swimming Pen Creek.

Outdoor Tiki bar. Come by boat, motorcycle or car. $ FB K TO L Tue.-Sun.; D Nightly

INTRACOASTAL WEST

4 BONES BARBECUE, 14286 Beach Blvd., Ste. 20, 419-9855. Classic Southern barbecue: Pulled pork, brisket, chicken, turkey, ribs, chorizo served market-style by the pound. Mac ’n’ cheese, baked beans, cole slaw, green beans.

Specialty sandwiches, banana pudding. $ K TO L D Tue.-Sat. AL’S PIZZA, 14286 Beach Blvd., Ste. 31, 223-0991. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ FB K TO L D Daily DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 14286 Beach Blvd., 223-0115. F BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 14333 Beach Blvd., Ste. 39, 992-1666. F Tamales, fajitas and pork tacos are customer favorites. Some La Nops have a full bar. $$ FB K TO L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 10750 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 14, 642-6980. F See Orange Park. $ K TO B L D Daily THE TENT HOOKAH LOUNGE, 12041 Beach Blvd., Ste. 4, 551-2962. Authentic fare, hookahs and flavored tobacco, specials and live belly dancing and fl oor seating, in keeping with that authenticity thing. Open late. $ BW L D Daily TIME OUT SPORTS GRILL, 13799 Beach Blvd., Ste. 5, 223-6999. F Locally-owned-and-operated grill serves hand-tossed pizzas, wings, wraps in a clean, sporty atmosphere. Daily drink specials, HD TVs, pool tables, darts, trivia. Late-night menu. $$ FB L Tue.-Sun.; D Nightly

JULINGTON CREEK

DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 525 S.R. 16, Ste. 101, St. Johns, 825-4540. BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily METRO DINER, 12807 San Jose Blvd., 638-6185. F BOJ winner. See San Marco. $$ R B L Daily TAPS BAR & GRILL, 2220 C.R. 210 W., Ste. 314, St. Johns, 819-1554. F See Fleming Island. $$ FB K L D Daily

MANDARIN

AL’S PIZZA, 11190 San Jose Blvd., 260-4115. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ FB K TO L D Daily ATHENS CAFÉ, 6271 St. Augustine Rd., Ste. 7, 733-1199.

F From the dolmades (stuffed grape leaves) to the baby shoes (stuffed eggplant), Athens has all the favorites. G reek

BITE-SIZED

Photos: Caron Streibich

THE CORNER STORE Conceived in Neptune Beach, developed in a 1965 Airstream,

Corner Taco brings its ‘semi-swanky’ tacos to 5 Points CORNER TACO 818 Post St., 240-0412, 5 Points facebook.com/cornertaco

I

n a back corner of The Lemon Bar, a popular Neptune Beach watering hole, is where Chris Dickerson’s Corner Taco got its start three years ago. After succeeding in that oceanfront spot, he took the leap into the food truck scene, buying a 1965 Airstream trailer to peddle his self-proclaimed “semi-swanky tacos.”

That’s all history now. Dickerson’s dream of opening a brick-and-mortar restaurant came true in February. Occupying the former Gina’s Deli location, his 5 Points eatery touts fare made of fresh ingredients, local craft beers on draft, plenty of indoor and outdoor seating, and decorative strings of globe lights to replicate that singular food truck experience.

Every morning, the staff cranks up a tortilla maker, one of only two in the state (the other is at EPCOT), sending through a mound of fresh dough; moments later, a pile of fresh corn tortillas is born. No preservatives here, folks.

As the name suggests, get the tacos: $3.45 nabs you a carnitas (cooked for 24 hours!), crispy Dijon buttermilk-fried chicken, jerk chicken or local Artie’s tempeh taco.

For another buck, you can snag a semi-swanktacular taco — brisket, seared asparagus with flaked Maldon sea salt, mahi or a vegan hummusand-tabouli taco aptly dubbed The 5 Points. Tacos come atop shredded red cabbage, sweet chile-lemon sauce and sprigs of cilantro, with lime wedges to squeeze. The portions are modest, but Corner Taco aims to leave you satisfied, not stuffed.

There’s also no cheese, shredded iceberg lettuce or diced pico de gallo like you find at other taco joints around town.

The Dyno-Mite ($9.95, plus $3.45 for added protein) is a hefty mound of crispy Dijon buttermilk fried chicken, marinated chicken or carnitas atop tortilla chips smothered with a homemade creamy white

cheddar and brie fondue, chopped piquillo peppers, halved grape tomatoes, lime wedges and fresh cilantro. It’s smart to share.

Sides clock in from $2.95 to $4.95. The Carolina rice pilaf, quinoa, and black beans with country ham and porcini broth are good accompaniments, but the real winner is the perfectly cooked — not mushy or crunchy — seared asparagus ($5.95). I gobbled it up like candy. And definitely go for guacamole with chips ($5.75), which is made-to-order, super-creamy and of a gorgeous green hue.

The joint is open Tuesday through Sunday, and it’s likely you’ll run into the energetic, friendly Dickerson himself greeting customers and boasting about the ingredients. Grab a local craft beer and snag a seat at the bar.

You’ll become instant pals.

Caron Streibich biteclub@folioweekly.com PROMISE facebook.com/folioweeklybitesized

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DINING DIRECTORY

A WEEKLY Q&A WITH PEOPLE IN THE FOOD BIZ

ST. JOHNS TOWN CENTER

RESTAURANT: Kazu Japanese Restaurant, 9965 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 35, Mandarin at 260-9770. representative

MOXIE KITCHEN + COCKTAILS, 4972 Big Island Dr., 998-9744. Chef Tom Gray’s new place features innovative contemporary American cuisine – seafood, steaks, pork, burgers, salads, sides and desserts – using locally sourced ingredients when possible. $$$ FB K L Mon.-Fri.; D Nightly MSHACK, 10281 Midtown Pkwy., 642-5000. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $$ BW L D Daily OVINTE, 10208 Buckhead Branch Dr., 900-7730. BOJ winner. Comfy, chic; tapas and small plates of Spanish and Italian flavors: ceviche fresco, pappardelle bolognese.

240-bottle wine list, 75 by the glass, craft spirits. Outdoor dining; bocce court. $$ FB R, Sun.; D Nightly

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FAVORITE RESTAURANT (other than mine): Sushi of Gari in New York City

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FAVORITE COOKING STYLE: My specialty is authentic sushi.

Produced by KAC_ Checked by Sales Rep RE_ FAVORITE INGREDIENTS: Basil, yuzu, daikon relish IDEAL MEAL: Authentic, traditional Asian dishes WILL NOT CROSS MY LIPS: I’ll eat anything!

INSIDER’S SECRET: Fresh!

SAN JOSE, LAKEWOOD

CELEBRITY SIGHTING AT KAZU: Sshhh!

CULINARY TREAT: Sake beers. $$ BW L Mon.-Fri.; D Mon.-Sat. DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 10391 Old St. Augustine Rd., Ste. 1, 880-7087. F BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily HARMONIOUS MONKS, 10550 Old St. Augustine Rd., Ste. 30, 880-3040. F American-style steakhouse features Angus steaks, gourmet burgers, ribs, wraps. $$ FB K L D Mon.-Sat. KAZU JAPANESE RESTAURANT, 9965 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 35, 683-9903. The new place has a wide variety of soups, dumplings, appetizers, salads, bento boxes, sushi, entrées, maki handrolls, sashimi. $$ FB TO L D Daily LA NOPALERA, 11700 San Jose Blvd., 288-0175. F Tamales, fajitas and pork tacos are customer favorites.

Some locations offer a full bar. $$ FB K TO L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 11365 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 3, 674-2945. F See Orange Park. $ K TO B L D Daily THE RED ELEPHANT PIZZA & GRILL, 10131 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 12, 683-3773. F This casual, family-friendly eatery serves pizzas, sandwiches, grill specials, burgers and pasta dishes. Gluten-free friendly. $ FB K L D Daily RENNA’S PIZZA, 11111 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 12, 292-2300.

F Casual New York-style pizzeria. Calzones, antipasto, parmigiana, homemade breads. $$ BW K TO L D Daily

ORANGE PARK, MIDDLEBURG

ARON’S PIZZA, 650 Park Ave., 269-1007. F Familyowned restaurant has eggplant dishes, manicotti, New York-style pizzas. $$ BW K TO L D Daily DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 1540 Wells Rd., 269-2122. BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily THE HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Road, 272-5959. Southern-style dining. Specialties: New Orleans shrimp, certified Black Angus prime rib, she-crab soup, desserts. $$$ FB D Tue.-Sat. KRISTIN’S ON THE RIVER, 2511 Blanding Blvd., 3899455. This newly re-opened spot serves seafood and American favorites. $$ FB K TO L D Daily LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 9734 Crosshill Blvd., 908-4250. 2024 Kingsley Ave., 276-2776. F See Mandarin. $$ FB TO L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1330 Blanding Blvd., 276-7370.

1545 C.R. 220, 278-2827. 700 Blanding Blvd., Ste. 15, 272-3553. 1401 S. Orange Ave., Green Cove Springs, 284-7789. F All over the area, they pile ’em high and serve ’em fast. Hot/cold subs, soups, salads. $ K TO B L D Daily THE ROADHOUSE, 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611. F Wings, KAC_ Checked

by Sales RepPool RE\_ sandwiches, burgers, quesadillas; 35+ years. tables, darts, foosball, TVs. 75+ imported beers. $ FB L D Daily

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AL’S PIZZA, 635 A1A N., 543-1494. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ FB K TO L D Daily CLAUDE’S CHOCOLATES, 145 Hilden Rd., Ste. 122, 829-5790. Hand-crafted in the onsite factory, with premium Belgian chocolate, fruits, nuts and spices.

Cookies and popsicles. Claude’s will ship your order. $$ TO LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 830 A1A N., Ste. 6, 273-3993. F See Orange Park. $ K TO B L D Daily RESTAURANT MEDURE, 818 A1A N., 543-3797. Chef David Medure creates with a wide range of global flavors. The lounge offers small plates, creative drinks and entertainment, including happy hour twice daily. $$$ FB D Mon.-Sat.

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RIVERSIDE, 5 POINTS, WESTSIDE

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AL’S PIZZA, 1620 Margaret St., Ste. 201, 388-8384. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ FB K TO L D Daily BLACK SHEEP RESTAURANT, 1534 Oak St., 355-3793.

BOJ winner. New American favorites with a Southern twist, made with locally sourced ingredients. Awesome rooftop bar. $$$ FB R Sat. & Sun.; L D Daily BOLD BEAN COFFEE ROASTERS, 869 Stockton St., Stes.

1-2, 855-1181. F BOJ winner. Small-batch, artisanal coffee roasting. Organic, fair trade. $ BW TO B L Daily CORNER TACO, 818 Post St., 240-0412. Made-from-scratch “semi-swanky street food” – tacos, nachos and salads, plus gluten-free and vegetarian options, in a bricks-and-mortar building. $ BW L D Tue.-Sun. DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 5972 San Juan Ave., Westside,

693-9258. BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily GRASSROOTS NATURAL MARKET, 2007 Park St., 384-4474. F BOJ winner. Juice bar has certified organic fruit, vegetables. Artisanal cheese, 300+ craft/import beer, organic wines, produce, meats, wraps, raw, vegan. $ BW TO B L D Daily HAWKERS, 1001 Park St., 508-0342. The new spot is based on Asian street vendors. A collection of hawker recipes is served under one roof. $ BW TO L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1509 Margaret St., 674-2794.

7895 Normandy Blvd., 781-7600. 5733 Roosevelt Blvd., Westside, 446-9500. 8102 Blanding Blvd., Westside, 779-1933. F See Orange Park. $ K TO B L D Daily METRO DINER, 4495 Roosevelt Blvd., Ortega, 999-4600.

F BOJ winner. See San Marco. $$ R B L Daily MOON RIVER PIZZA, 1176 Edgewood Ave. S., 389-4442.

F BOJ winner. See Amelia Island. $ BW TO L D Mon.-Sat. THE MOSSFIRE GRILL, 1537 Margaret St., 355-4434.

F Southwestern dishes like fresh fish tacos and chicken enchiladas are popular. Happy hour runs Mon.-Sat. in the upstairs lounge, and all day Sun. $$ FB K L D Daily O’BROTHERS IRISH PUB, 1521 Margaret St., 854-9300.

F Traditional Irish fare like shepherd’s pie with Stilton crust, Guinness mac-n-cheese and fish-n-chips. Outdoor patio dining is available. $$ FB K TO L D Daily SUN-RAY CINEMA, 1028 Park St., 359-0049. F Beer (Bold City, Intuition Ale Works), wine, pizza, hot dogs, hummus, sandwiches, popcorn, nachos, brownies. $$ BW Daily

ST. AUGUSTINE

AL’S PIZZA, 1 St. George St., 824-4383. F BOJ winner.

See Beaches. $ FB K TO L D Daily AVILES RESTAURANT & LOUNGE, 32 Avenida Menendez, 829-2277. F Hilton Bayfront Hotel. Progressive Europeanflavored menu; made-to-order pasta night, wine dinners, chophouse nights, deluxe breakfast buffet. Sun. champagne brunch bottomless mimosas. Free valet. $$$ FB K B L D Daily CANDLELIGHT SOUTH, 1 Anastasia Blvd., 819-0588. F Brand-new on the island, the casual restaurant originally in Scarsdale, N.Y., offers fish tacos, sandwiches, wings, desserts and sangria. Daily specials. $ BW K TO L D Daily CARMELO’S MARKETPLACE & PIZZERIA, 146 King St., 494-6658. F New York-style brick-oven-baked pizza, fresh sub rolls, Boar’s Head meats, cheeses, garlic herb wings. Outdoor seating, Wi-Fi. $$ BW TO L D Daily CLAUDE’S CHOCOLATES, 6 Granada St., 829-5790.

Inside The Market. Wine and chocolate pairings, soft-serve ice cream, a coffee bar, fresh fruit ice pops, cookies. $$ TO CRUISERS GRILL, 3 St. George St., 824-6993. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ BW K L D Daily DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 4010 U.S. 1 S., 547-2669. BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily THE FLORIDIAN, 39 Cordova St., 829-0655. Updated Southern fare: fresh, local ingredients from area farms.

Vegetarian, gluten-free options. Signature items: fried green tomato bruschetta, grits with shrimp, fish or tofu. $$$ BW K TO L D Wed.-Mon. GYPSY CAB COMPANY, 828 Anastasia Blvd., Anastasia Island, 824-8244. F A mainstay for a quarter-century, Gypsy’s menu changes twice daily. Signature dish is Gypsy chicken. Seafood, tofu, duck, veal. $$ FB R Sun.; L D Daily HARRY’S SEAFOOD BAR & GRILLE, 46 Avenida Menendez, 824-7765. F New Orleans-style. Cajun, Creole, Southern flavors with a modern twist: fresh seafood, steaks, pork, jambalaya, shrimp. Daily happy hour. $$ FB K TO L D Daily LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 155 Hampton Point Dr., 230-7879. F See Mandarin. $$ FB K TO L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 410 Anastasia Blvd., 826-4040. F Bite Club certified. BOJ winner.

See Beaches. $ BW K TO L D Daily MOJO OLD CITY BBQ, 5 Cordova St., 342-5264. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $$ FB K TO L D Daily PACIFIC ASIAN BISTRO, 159 Palencia Village Dr., Ste. 111, 808-1818. F BOJ winner. Chef Mas Lui creates 30+ unique sushi rolls; fresh sea scallops, Hawaiian-style poke tuna salad. $$-$$$ BW L D Daily TEMPO, 16 Cathedral Place, 547-0240. The newish fusion restaurant specializes in healthful American fare with a Latin flair. $$ BW TO L D Tue.-Sun.

CRUISERS GRILL, 5613 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 1, 7372874. BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ BW K L D Daily DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 1610 University Blvd. W., 4482110. BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily FUSION SUSHI, 1550 University Blvd. W., 636-8688. F New upscale sushi spot serves fresh sushi, sashimi, hibachi, teriyaki, kiatsu. $$ K L D Daily MOJO BAR-B-QUE, 1607 University Blvd. W., 732-7200.

F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $$ FB K TO B L D Daily

SAN MARCO, SOUTHBANK, ST. NICHOLAS

BASIL THAI & SUSHI, 1004 Hendricks Ave., 674-0190. F Pad Thai, curries, sushi, served in a relaxing environment.

Dine indoors or on the patio. $$ FB L D Mon.-Sat. THE GROTTO WINE & TAPAS BAR, 2012 San Marco Blvd., 398-0726. F Varied tapas menu of artisanal cheese plates, empanadas, bruschettas, homestyle cheesecake.

60+ wines by the glass. $$$ BW Tue.-Sun. LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 1631 Hendricks Ave., 399-1768. F See Mandarin. $$ FB K TO L D Daily MATTHEW’S, 2107 Hendricks Ave., 396-9922. Matthew Medure’s flagship. Fine dining, European-style atmosphere.

Artfully presented cuisine, small plates, extensive martini/ wine lists. Reservations. $$$$ FB D Mon.-Sat. METRO DINER, 3302 Hendricks Ave., 398-3701. F BOJ winner. Original upscale diner in a historic 1930s-era building.

Meatloaf, chicken pot pie, homemade soups. $$ B R L Daily PIZZA PALACE 1959 San Marco Blvd., 399-8815. F See Baymeadows. $$ BW TO L D Daily

SOUTHSIDE

360° GRILLE, LATITUDE 30, 10370 Philips Hwy., 3655555. F Seafood, steaks, burgers, chicken, sandwiches, pizza. Dine inside, on patio. $$ FB TO L D Daily ALHAMBRA THEATRE & DINING, 12000 Beach Blvd., 641-1212. Longest-running dinner theater. Executive Chef DeJuan Roy’s menus coordinated with stage productions.

Reservations suggested. $$ FB D Tue.-Sun. CASA MARIA, 14965 Old St. Augustine Rd., 619-8186.

F See Beaches. $ FB K L D Daily DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 10750 Atlantic Blvd., 619-0954.

BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily THE DIM SUM ROOM, 9041 Southside Blvd., Ste. 138D, 363-9888. In Watami. All-you can-eat sushi, choice of two items from teppanyaki grill. $ FB K L D Daily.

LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 3611 St. Johns Bluff S., 641-6499. 4479 Deerwood Lake Pkwy., 425-4060. F See Orange Park. BOJ winner. $ K TO B L D Daily MANGIA! ITALIAN BISTRO & BAR, 3210 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., 551-3061. F Chef/owner Tonino DiBella offers fine dining – fresh seafood, veal, steaks, New York-style pizza, desserts.

Happy hour Mon.-Sat. Patio. $$$ FB K TO L D Mon.-Sat. MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 9734 Deer Lake Ct., Ste. 1, 997-1955. F See Beaches. Bite Club certified. BOJ winner. $ BW K TO L D Daily SEVEN BRIDGES GRILLE & BREWERY, 9735 Gate Pkwy.

N., 997-1999. F Local seafood, steaks, pizzas. Brewer Aaron Nesbit handcrafts award-winning freshly brewed ales and lagers. Inside, outdoors. $$ FB K TO L D Daily TAVERNA YAMAS, 9753 Deer Lake Court, 854-0426. F Bite Club certified. BOJ winner. Char-broiled kabobs, seafood, wines, desserts. Belly dancing. $$ FB K L D Daily WORLD OF BEER, 9700 Deer Lake Court, Ste. 1, 551-5929. F Apps and bar food: German pretzels, hummus, pickle chips, flatbreads. Craft drafts from Germany, Cali, Florida (Bold City brews), Ireland, Belgium. $$ BW L D Daily

SPRINGFIELD, NORTHSIDE

DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 12400 Yellow Bluff Rd., Ste. 101, 619-9828. F BOJ winner. NASCAR-themed spot has 365 kinds of wings, half-pound burgers, ribs. $ FB K TO L D Daily HOLA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 1001 N. Main, 356-3100.

F Fresh Mexican fare: fajitas, burritos, enchiladas, daily specials. Happy hour daily; sangria. $ BW K TO L D Mon.-Sat. LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 12001 Lem Turner, 764-9999. See Orange Park. $ K TO B L D Daily SAVANNAH BISTRO, 14670 Duval Rd., 741-4404. F Low Country Southern fare, taste of Mediterranean and French.

Crowne Plaza Airport. Crab cakes, New York strip, she crab soup, mahi mahi. Rainforest Lounge. $$$ FB K B L D Daily.

ASTROLOGY

BULLDOZERS, EEYORE, McCONAUGHEY & IGUANAS ARIES (March 21-April 19): Dear Astrologer: We Aries have an intense fire burning inside.

It’s an honor and a privilege. We’re lucky to be animated with such a generous share of the big energy that gives life to all of nature, but sometimes the fire gets too wild and strong. We can’t manage it. It’s out of our control. That’s how I’ve felt lately. The beloved flames that usually move and excite me are now the very thing making me crazy. What to do? — Aries.

Dear Aries: Learn from firefighters in forest fires. They use digging tools to create wide strips of dirt around the fire, removing all the flammable brush and wood debris.

When the fire reaches this path, it has no fuel. Close your eyes and visualize it.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): “My personal philosophy is not to undertake a project unless it is manifestly important and nearly impossible.” Taurus-born Edwin Land, who invented the Polaroid camera, said that. These might be useful words to live by between your 2014 and your 2015 birthdays. In the next 12 months, you’ll have the potential of homing in on a dream to fuel your passions for years. It may seem nearly impossible, but that’s just what excites you about it. Keep going – as long as it takes to get it done.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): I wish there were a way you could play with construction equipment for a few hours. I’d love it if you could get up in a bulldozer and flatten a small hill. Use an excavator to destroy a decrepit old shed or clear a piece of land of stumps and dead trees. Metaphorically speaking, that’s the kind of work you need to do on your inner landscape: move around big, heavy stuff, demolish outworn structures, reshape the area to make way for new building projects.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): In the Transformers movies, Optimus Prime is a giant extraterrestrial warrior robot. His body has an array of weapons he uses for righteous causes, like protecting Earth’s creatures. The character is voiced by actor Peter Cullen, who’s also worked extensively for another entertainment franchise, Winnie the Pooh.

He does vocals for gloomy donkey Eeyore, who writes poetry and has a pink ribbon tied in a bow on his tail.

Cullen’s your role model for now, to inspire you to get to your Eeyore side. Work with your Optimus Prime part.

What? You don’t have an Optimus Prime part? Eeyore might say that, but I say you do.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Do you finally get that you don’t have to imitate stress-addled workaholics and self-wounding overachievers to be as proficient as they are? Do you see if you want to fix, heal and change the world around you, you have to fix, heal and change you? Is it clear that if you hope to gain more power to shape the institutions of which you’re part, you’ve got to strengthen your power over you? Ready to see that if you want to reach the next success level, dissolve your fears of success?

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “Beauty is the purgation of superfluities,” said Michelangelo.

Do you agree? Can you make your life more marvelous by giving up some trivial pursuits? Would you be more attractive if you got rid of one unimportant desire? Can you experience more lyrical grace if you slough off irrelevant worries? Think about it. According to my astrological omen interpretation, experiencing beauty isn’t a luxury, but a necessity. For the sake of mental,

physical and spiritual health, be in its presence as much as possible.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): I’m fairly sure God wants you to be rich. Or at least richer. And I want you to be richer. How about it? Want to be wealthier? Or a bit more flush? Would you rather dodge the spiritual tests you’d have to take if you’re a money magnet? Would you prefer to go about daily affairs, not dealing with more responsibility and obligation? You soon get fresh evidence. How you respond determines if you’ll take advantage of new financial opportunities becoming available.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): The 2014 U.S. military budget is $633 billion. In comparison, the United Nations’ peacekeeping budget is $7.8 billion. My country will spend 81 times more to wage war than the U.N. will spend to make peace. I’d rather the ratio were flipped, but my opinion means zip.

Maybe I can convince you to put greater emphasis on cultivating cooperation and harmony than being swept up in aggression and conflict. You may get riled up in the weeks ahead, but that leads away from the good life.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Actor Matthew McConaughey prides himself on his willingness to learn from mistakes and failures.

A few years ago, he collected and read all the negative reviews critics had written about his film work. It was “an interesting kind of experiment,” he told Yahoo News.

“There was some really good constructive criticism.”

According to my astrological omen reading, now’s a great time to try an experiment like McConaughey’s. All right, all right, all right.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Dear Oracle: I may be hallucinating, but I swear my pet iguana gets turned on when I disrobe in front of it. My naked body seems to incite it to strut around, make guttural hissing sounds and act like it’s doing a mating dance. Is it me, or is the planets? I think my iguana is a Capricorn like me. — Captivating Capricorn.

Dear Capricorn: Only rarely have I seen Capricorns exude such high levels of animal magnetism as you do now.

Careful where you point that stuff! A wide variety of creatures may find you extra hot.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): “Eat like you love yourself,” advises author Tara Stiles.

“Move like you love yourself. Speak like you love yourself. Act like you love yourself.” Those four things should be top priorities. Right now, you can’t afford to treat your beautiful organism with even a hint of carelessness. Upgrade the respect, compassion and reverence you give yourself. Breathe, sleep, dream, think and make love like you love yourself.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): If blindfolded, most people can’t tell the difference between Pepsi and Coca-Cola. I bet you can, this week.

Odds are, you can distinguish between genuine promises and fake ones. You always know when folks are fooling themselves. No one’s able to trick you into believing in hype, lies or nonsense. These days, you’re unusually perceptive, sensitive and discerning. May be a problem, since you won’t be able to enjoy the comfort and consolation illusions offer. Mostly it’s an asset, giving a huge tactical advantage and good joke material.

Rob Brezsny freewillastrology@freewillastrology.com

APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 35

NEWS OF THE WEIRD “OOOOOH! AAAHH! EH?”

The Canadian Radio-television & Telecommunications Commission in March reprimanded three pornography broadcast stations — not for excessively erotic fare, but for violating Canada’s protectionist, patriotic rules requiring that at least 35 percent of all content be of Canadian origin. According to its notice, the 24-hour AOV Adult Movie Channel, XXX Action Clips and Maleflixxx fell short of the 8-1/2-hours-a-day of north-of-the-border sex action (and, in an additional charge, failed to provide enough closed captioning for the yeahs and oh, babys).

DRUNK LOGIC

Wendy Simpson, 25, explaining her DUI arrest during a March incident in Huddersfield, England, pointed out she’d just minutes earlier walked to a McDonald’s for a late-night meal because she knew she was too inebriated to drive.

However, the dining room was closed, and she was refused service at the drive-thru because she was on foot, and, she said, the only option left was to go home, get her car and return to the drivethru. On the way back, she was arrested.

BUT, OSSIFFER …

Efren Carrillo, a member of California’s Sonoma County Board of Supervisors, was charged with misdemeanor “peeking” last year in Santa Rosa after he, returning home from a club late at night, saw his female neighbor’s light on and decided to drop in on her (though he didn’t even know her name).

He knocked at her back patio door, carrying beers, but was dressed awkwardly, leading the woman to call 911. “In retrospect,” the county supervisor told police afterward, “I should have had my pants on” (instead of just his

36 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014

socks and underwear). His trial was underway at press time.

TOO SEXY FOR HIS CELL

Among the arguments offered in March by Darrious Mathis’ lawyers for his jury trial in Cobb County, Georgia, (for assault, kidnapping and carjacking) was the assertion that Mathis needed no force in order to have sex with the female victim on the night in question — because Mathis is such a good-looking man. The jury was not so dazzled and convicted him on all charges.

PULL THE RING

England’s Stockport magistrates’ court levied a $13,000 fine in March against Lorraine White, 41, who runs a part-time service as a dominatrix (chaining and whipping “bad” men) in a “sex dungeon.” Her business is apparently legal; the citation was for violating fire codes because inspectors couldn’t see how a client, being disciplined (handcuffed and chained), would escape in case of fire.

SOUNDS LIKE A JOKE

The Food and Drug Administration has had run-ins with “homeopathic” products that subtly market themselves as health remedies without ever having sought the required FDA approval.

However, in March, a different problem arose, requiring the agency to order a recall of 56 batches of homeopathic remedies made by the Ferndale, Washington, company Terra-Medica — because they may have (accidentally) been genuine medicine. A variety of the firm’s capsules, tablets and suppositories, said the FDA, may have contained actual penicillin, inadvertently produced as a by-product of fermentation.

Chuck Shepherd weirdnews@earthlink.net

BEAUTIFUL POKER PLAYER @ PLAYERS ISU after poker Wednesday night, Players Grill, with redheaded friend. Your beautiful blonde hair caught my eye.

You: White top. Me: Black blue-striped golf shirt, admired you from the bar. You hugged girls; I want one of those hugs! When: April 23. Where: Players Grill. #1354-0430 YOU HELD DOOR OPEN FOR ME ...

To go in. Me: Tall brunette, blue shirt. You: Brown hair, beautiful eyes, burgundy shirt/jeans, black Chevy SUV or Escalade. I think you went in Walmart after I did. I looked for you; love to meet again. When: April 21. Where: Walmart Gas Station Philips Hwy. #1353-0430 ISU LOOKING AT ISU! At Mandarin Library; reading in the back of Folio Weekly, laughing. Assumed it was ISU. You: Cute brunette, wonderful laugh. Me: Tall muscular brunette, always checking DVDs out. Love to know the person behind the laughter. Where: Mandarin Library. When: April 16. #1352-0423 SO WAS IT THE ALTERNATOR? You: Inadvertently at my moving sale, Atlantic Beach, Sunday a.m., 4/13, working on buddy’s wife’s Jeep. You looked sexy under the hood working with your hands; my morning was more exciting! Bummed you never returned. Take me for a ride in your Altima before it sells? I’ll handle the heat! Where: Eakin & Sneed Law Firm, AB. When: April 13. #1351-0423 MUDVILLE GRILLE TRIVIA NIGHT You: At bar, waiting for (first?) date. My buddy and I were woefully undermanned for trivia; you jumped in to help! Me: Blue-shirted guy with onion ring fetish. I like how we connected; you were busy when your date came. Did it work out? :-) Where: Mudville Trivia. When: April 4. #1350-0423 I SAW MY FUTURE ISU hanging at a friend’s. Looking into your eyes, there was something about you; you felt it, too.

You: Blue jeans, black top; I remember smile most. Your voice was a sign from heaven; my angel was there for me to love. When: 2011. Where: Captiva Bluff. #1349-0416 DAD NEEDS CUSTOMER SERVICE Came in with my

Blowing me kisses. Me: Pink hair, tattoos, gray Chevy Cobalt. Come see me at Regis salon in Town Center so I can catch some of those kisses. When: April 3. Where: Atlantic Boulevard. #1346-0409 DONOVAN’S IRISH PUB You: Alone at bar, ball cap, having dinner, talked football with others. Me: Blonde, pink shirt across bar with friend. Made eye contact; I felt attraction across the room. Wish I had your name; didn’t want to be rude to friend. Asked bartender if you were a regular; sadly, didn’t know. Hope you see this. When: March 30. Where: Donovan’s. #1345-0409 POOL BOY & FORMER POOL GIRL We were parked next to each other. You weren’t satisfi ed with the car wash. I borrowed your vacuum. Loved your tattoo. I should have ...

Haven’t/can’t stop thinking about you. When: Sunday, March 23. Where: CarBux San Jose. #1344-0402 BEAUTIFUL ASIAN AT PAPA JOHN’S ARGYLE You: Asian and beautiful, drives late model Hyundai. We made eye contact briefly. I feel like a fool for not asking for your number. Describe me and let’s start the revolution. When: March 19. Where: Papa John’s. #1343-0326 BURGER SLINGIN’ BEAUTY You: Breathtaking brunette behind counter, providing burgers to all lucky to be in your presence. Me: Tall, dark-haired gentleman, catches you gazing intimately into my eyes every Tuesday. OK, yes, it’s mutual. Skip small talk and make this thing official? When: March 18. Where: MShack Atlantic Beach. #1342-0326 CONVERSATION SURPRISE You: Attractive SWF, 5’2”-4”, 130, nonsmoker, athletic, late 50s-early-60s. Afternoon conversation, coffee, nearly choked when I asked about “friends with benefits LTR.” Gave your cell number; can’t find. Me: SWM, 5’8”, 185, nonsmoker, excellent health, early 70s, retired successful executive, homeowner. When: Jan. 15. Where: Starbucks. #1341-0312

Advertising proof this is a copyright protected proof ©

SWEATY CYCLIST SEEKS SEXY SITTER You: Beautiful, Middle-Eastern-looking au pair, pumping Gate gas; two kids.

Me: Fit, ginger, sun-glistened cyclist. Eyes locked, my heart pulled a wheelie. My Schwinn couldn’t catch your Audi. Drop kids; see what my cyclist pants can barely contain. When: March 1. Where: Gate Gas Station. #1340-0312

daughter;call you helped find a skirt. Help me representative find a way to s, please yourheradvertising at 260-9770. rUn dAte: 053111 your heart? You: Short blonde hair, folding shirts in men’s Me: Salt & pepper, in beard, love to jog, hoping ROOF section.

IF POSSIBLE ATgray268-3655 things work out for us ;-). When: March 28. Where: Forever

21 @ Avenues. #1348-0416 f benefit sUpport

BATHROOMS & SOUP? Me: Short, woman, blackby Produced byred-headed ab Checked Ask for Action

PUBLIX SMILE & WAVE BLONDE BEAUTY Atlantic & Hodges Publix. You: Pretty blonde, blue eyes, blue workout clothes. Me: 6 feet tall, blue eyes, blue shirt. Eyes met on opposite lines. Almost sprained my neck. You smiled, waved, left. Should’ve run after. Both seasoned. Don’t get many chances for connection, desire I felt. Take a chance.

When: April 3. Where: Publix Atlantic/Hodges. #1347-0409 ATLANTIC BLVD. CHOPPER HOTTIE W/ VA TAGS You: Harley jacket, copper Chopper westbound with buddy.

uniform. You: Gorgeous blue eyes, grey shirt, almost-shaved blond hair. You asked where bathroom was; I answered. We saw each other in check-out lane. You and my mom talked about soup myths. I’d really like to get to know you. :) When: March 2. Where: Barnes & Noble, San Jose Blvd. #1339-0305

Sales Rep db

MOST BEAUTIFUL NURSE You: Most caring nurse I’ve ever seen. Short, brown-haired Latin goddess with glasses and always smiling. V., you are so good with the children you take care of. Would love to take you out some time. When: Feb. 7. Where: Wolfson ICU. #1338-0305

© APRIL 30-MAY 6, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 37

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ACROSS 1 Bunch for honeybunch 6 Wonder Woman’s alias 11 You must remember this 16 Doctor’s job that requires a knife (and spoon)?

19 Mideast buck 20 Seeks fair treatment, doctor-style?

22 Fennel-like herb 23 Adder’s kin 24 Continue 25 Where criers cry 27 Print shop units 28 Meredith Willson classic, with “The” 32 Doctor’s comment about famous-brand meds vs. generic?

35 Student aid 36 Road runners?

38 Gabardine yarn 39 Milk mishap 41 Squarish 42 Final resting places 44 Yaphet’s “Raid on Entebbe” role 45 “Take your best shot,” to a doctor?

47 New Rochelle college 48 Rolling ___ (rich) 49 Malarial fever 50 Flock member 51 With 71 Across, Jill Clayburgh film that doctors recommend?

54 Referendum choice 55 Agreement 57 Love god, in Latin 58 Hill builder 59 Certain doc’s fixation?

66 Baseball’s Bando 67 Norwegian saint 68 Norwegian city 69 Zero 71 See 51 Across 76 Actor Herbert 77 Ward (off) 78 Sicilian rumbler 79 Gamble or gambol 80 Parts a doctor may remove ___ from his car?

1

6

7

W A I S T L L E I A G N WO E

8

B O T H

B R A H E

L I T E R

T O G O

M O L A R

A E G I S

9

L S S H T E C L S G E A R A F E R E W B Y S A A A C K C K S H S U B S A C A T Y I H R R A T N L O C

29

39

30

11

12

10

36

40

50

54

55 59

72

37

52

66

67

68

75

81

15

65 70

82

95

96

101 102

103

107

108 109 110

112 114

O R R I N

87

94

106

A L K E C O

91

100 105

P A N T Y H O S E

77

90

99

64 69

80

93

O B E Y

34

63

86

92

E M I L E

53

76

89

N O B E T

58

79

88

E L S E

44

51

85

14

P R I Z E

48

62

84

13

A U R A L

27

47

61

83

S A A R

43

57

74

O D I E

T H U S M M U M B I R E S R G A V E R C S O T A M P I R A L E M S U D Y S B R F R A L A S W I T H O N K T H E E O S O P

38

60

73

L A T H

U M L O M E

22 26

42

56

C O I N O P

33

41

49

S P R A T S

19

32

46

113

R E G I M E A N I T M S

25

31

45

111

V OW A N O L A R G L O E A D Y I N A N K S S H A L L O P A T A R D T R O B E MM A S O R I S N P S T E A WO T R E B I G B A E L T T U

18

24

35

104

A L L E R G I W E E S B B O P M A A L N N A A V E H E A N L O P O E T

21

28

78

HEALTH & BEAUTY

5

O C H R E

17

23

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74 Twitched 75 Queasy 76 Org. for women drivers?

77 Serendipitous, perhaps 80 Greenskeeper’s supply 81 Song-compilation co.

82 Cut back 84 See 29 Down 85 Pre-statehood area: abbr.

86 The Baltimore Ravens were named in his honor 89 Superman sighting error 90 Abu Dhabi pooh-bah 91 Some chinaware 93 Celebes ox 94 Boston players, briefly 95 One of Tina’s “30 Rock” co-stars 96 Pandemonium 97 Memo abbr.

98 GBS contemporary 101 Arizona’s Superstition, for ex.

102 Rick’s love 104 Car wash appliance, briefly 105 “Blue tabs,” briefly 107 Even (the score) 108 Choose 109 Ear prefix 110 Backtalk

Solution to Sorry, Wrong Letter!

J E W E L

20

71

HOSPITALITY

3

DOWN 1 Puts in for another hitch 2 Signs off on 3 Pt. of CBS 4 One with a Pole position 5 Catchphrase 6 Carpenter’s groove 7 ___ instant 8 Money machine 9 ___ a pin 10 Special lingo 11 Oral-health org.

12 They’re in the closet 13 Working on “Frozen,” e.g.

14 TV, radio and such 15 A miner discovery?

16 Bach’s “___, Joy of Man’s Desiring” 17 Dianetics guy 18 Latest 20 He plays for 102 Down 21 Frosty, e.g.

26 Thurston Howell III type 29 With 84 Down, a 1950s catchphrase

16

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2

30 E. ___ 31 Shake alternative 32 Twisted, as humor 33 MGM motto word 34 Tightens text 36 Kingdom ___ 37 Prop for Bunyan 39 “1 vs. 100” host Bob 40 Luxurious 41 Greet ceremoniously 42 Hung out ___ 43 ___ mission 45 Chance to speak 46 ___ support (PC help) 47 Leave-taking words 48 A big fan of 51 “So why on earth should ___ ...” (line from “A Hard Day’s Night”) 52 Rob’s dad 53 Stats, e.g.

55 Pre-college exam: abbr.

56 Rights org.

57 Ease, as fears 60 She, in Salerno 61 From around here 62 Odometer reset 63 Jarhead’s org.

64 Get the better of 65 Trace of color 70 Church with elders: abbr.

71 Sick and tired 72 Previously 73 Free of restraints

83 “___ know you?”

84 Darn or dash followers 86 Walt Kelly’s possum 87 Brownish gray 88 Destroys, in a way 90 Filmgoer’s drink 91 Job benefit 92 Doctor’s favorite medium for making casts?

95 Night prowler 99 ___ Aviv 100 Taylor of “The Nanny” 101 Leon Uris’s “___ 18” 103 Hilly pts. of the city 104 “1876” author 106 Done with less than minimal care, to a doctor?

111 Words of support 112 Doctor’s idea about when children should start dieting nowadays?

113 Gave up 114 Tom Jones song, “___ Lady” 115 Hits the brake

115

97

98

U H Y E S

BACKPAGE EDITORIAL

BROKEN PROMISES

As the city of Jacksonville talks (again) about revitalizing Downtown, let’s remember what could have (and should have) been – and those left behind

T

he voices are loud and clear: Bring back the Downtown Jacksonville boom period that existed in the ’40s and ’50s, when the city center was crowded all week, especially on Saturday night. The area was home to more than five hotels, four department stores, several movie houses, quality restaurants and specialty shops.

Contributing to Downtown’s demise were a number of factors, including the construction of expressways such as Butler Boulevard; large

and its visions collect dust on someone’s shelf.

The plan’s visions were replaced by the already-established chicanery and deception at City Hall, which under consolidation has cost taxpayers hundreds of millions of dollars so far. It continued under the mayor’s River City Renaissance program, announced in early 1993.

These projects, costing more than $200 million, were supposed to be based on the Insight

landowners’ power and influence to convince gullible or programmed city officials to provide an egress onto their property from expressways so their land could be developed; and finally, the consolidation of almost the entirety of Duval County into the city of Jacksonville. This led to massive residential development in the newly opened areas in the form of single-family homes, apartments and condominiums. Next came major retail malls, which followed the movement of people deserting Downtown.

There was still hope the urban core could be saved. In 1991, then-Mayor Ed Austin came up with a radical solution, “Jacksonville Insight.”

He wanted citizens to band together to describe their priorities for the long-term dynamic growth of our city, and offer suggestions to improve quality of life. He wanted citizens to “join with me to begin a visioning process that would have Jacksonville’s people defining what they wanted the future of their city to be.” At its peak, about 2,000 individuals were involved.

In June 1992, the 30-page report was released. In his introduction, Austin wrote, “From the beginning, it was determined that Jacksonville Insight would not be just another planning process that would end up a report to collect dust on someone’s shelf. This vision will become a roadmap for our future. This is a roadmap to the future that will take us on a long journey … one beyond any single mayoral administration or council presidency.” The mayor concluded: “We are here at the beginning of our journey. We have a roadmap in hand and everyone is on board. We know our destination, and now we have only to move forward.”

More than 20 years on, Jacksonville Insight

recommendations, but there was no relationship.

The top priority in the Insight report was “Quality Education for All.” The released list of Renaissance projects didn’t mention aid to our crippled public school system. The closest thing to supporting education was $29 million allotted for an urgently needed new Central City Library.

In the final version of Renaissance, however, both the library and the $29 million vanished.

The deletion was made without explanation, despite the literature pointing out the terrible shape of the thenexisting library. The literature sheet even had a drawing of the proposed new library, which was finally built under the Better Jacksonville plan years later.

(Even then, there were questions about the architectural firm selected to build the library under Better Jacksonville. The sloppy process tainted quotes from the four firms submitting bids. The city hired a consultant, Heery International, to analyze the design and make a recommendation. Heery had worked with Robert A.M. Stern Architects on a “classical” design library in Nashville, and recommended the company’s proposal in Jacksonville.

That recommendation was challenged by the losing architects, who contended that Heery overestimated their design costs while lowballing Stern’s. As the Times-Union noted, “Heery’s report listed Stern’s estimated cost of

$51.4 million, but it did not include several multimillion-dollar items that were included in the costs for the other architects.” Earlier this month, the T-U reported that that library had a number of construction problems that would cost the city more than $1 million to repair.)

To justify the $49 million the Renaissance allocated for the Gator Bowl, the city said in a report, “If we don’t modernize, we are faced with losing the existing college games and relinquishing our competitive position to relin obtain NFL football. There is no cheap fix. obta We either do it right, or we need to abandon the stadium. Construction of a new stadium the size of the Gator Bowl could cost in excess of $100 million. For less than half the exc cost of a new one, we can have a state-ofcos the-art facility.” the The ultimate cost of renovating the Gator Ga Bowl, including interest and street changes, approached $300 million. The ch stadium retrofit alone cost $145 million. st One of the largest appropriations in Renaissance was $36 million for a Duval R County Recreation Complex, which was C designed to make the entrance from d II-95 into Downtown more attractive.

IIn a City Hall publication in 1993, Austin described it thusly: “The view A from I-95 and the entrance to the central city projects a poor image of Jacksonville to more than 90,000 local motorists and tourists each day. LaVilla, a 50-blo 50-block area bounded by I-95 and State, Broad aand Forsyth streets, is a blighted section of deteriorating and abandoned buildings. The City proposes to develop a greenbelt ‘front door’ to Downtown Jacksonville, stretching across LaVilla. Also included would be a major athletic and recreation complex serving the entire city.”

This complex, he continued, would include a gym, running track, ballfields and an aquatic center. The Downtown Development Board promised “an aesthetically pleasing view of downtown and its enticing amenities.” The estimated cost was $36 million. It was to be a “rebirth of our city.”

Like the Central City Library, this project and the $36 million committed to it vanished.

Compare the vanished LaVilla project, which would have brought enjoyment to tens of thousands of both local citizens and visitors throughout the entire year, to blowing $43 million in borrowed funds on a gaudy, gargantuan scoreboard at EverBank Field to serve a relative handful of individuals maybe 15 to 20 days a year.

No wonder City Hall repeatedly screws the average citizen while selling out to powerful vested interests. The effect of River City Renaissance is just one instance of the manipulation of city funds that continues to the present day. Only the naïve will expect a change from the negative tradition.

No wonder City Hall repeatedly screws the average citizen while selling out to powerful vested interests.

Marvin R. Edwards mail@folioweekly.com

Folio Weekly welcomes Backpage Editorial submissions. Essays should be no more than 1,200 words and on a topic of local interest or concern. Email your Backpage to mail@folioweekly.com. Opinions expressed on the Backpage are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of the editors or management of Folio Weekly.

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