The Gadfly “To persuade and reproach” - Socrates, The Apology
Vol. XV, Iss. II September 28, 2011
The Dangers of Harlequin Hitler A few weekends ago, my friends and I decided to see the film, ‘Captain America’, which had just premiered at the local movie theater. In all honesty, I wasn’t especially excited, for what looked like it was going to be plot-thin and effect-heavy, and I was never a great fan of the comics, but it looked fun enough. I’ll admit that, upon deciding to see the film, I even harbored some hope that it might be a really quality vintage-ish Superhero film, à la-‘Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow’. The film stars Chris Evans (Wait… isn’t that the Hu-
man Torch?) as Steve Rogers, an unhealthy but noble runt circa 1942 (made into a nebbish through some moderately impressive ‘Benjamin Button’-esque special effects). The military won’t let him join on account of his poor health, but so adamant is he to defend his country that he signs up for a Government-run “super soldier” experiment orchestrated by Stanley Tucci (who plays a German scientist with an accent that’s more ‘Hogan’s Heroes’ than ‘Schindler’s List’). The experiment succeeds in making Rogers ripped, but unfortunately the lab is then
immediately blown up by a Nazi spy. Thus Rogers becomes one of a kind, and Captain America is born. For a while he unhappily sells out as stage-andscreen star, that is, until he butts heads with Nazi occultist Johann Schmidt, a close frenemy of Hitler with unlimited access to Viking magic and a face only a mother could love (he looks like he might be the love-child of Voldemort and Darth Maul). Schmidt has his own army (called ‘Hydra’) which apparently puts regular Nazis to shame. They even have their own version of the Continued on page 5
Philosophy of (Harry Potter and) the Human Person To digress from the omnipresent “is Harry Potter morally sound” debate, I am proposing the “are J.K. Rowling and Dr. Harold on a secret spy team together” debate. I maintain that I would not have passed Dr. Harold’s philosophy of the human person class without a personal comprehensive library of Potterisms that I made into a
study guide before the final. This naturally leads me to believe that J.K. Rowling and Dr. Harold are best friends. Here are a few parallels so that you can see for yourself. Parallel #1: Dr. Harold spent an entire lecture discussing the “Ministry of Truths” in Orwell’s 1984. Harry Potter spent an entire
book running from the Ministry of Magic. Coincidence? Nope. Parallel #2 From Harold’s “Religious nature of man” lecture: Part of the religious nature of the human person is his ability to choose between two ultimate ends: subjective satisfaction Continued on page 4
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St. Moses the Black, pray for us!
Staff:
Letter From the Editor: Dear Gadflyians,
Writers: Keith Michael Estrada (K.M.E.) Sarah Hartung (S.H.) Mary Kineke (M.K.) Jacob Popcak (J.P.) Alexander Pyles (A.S.P.) Joseph Stallings (J.S.) Anne Tulloch (A.T.) Business Manager: Alexander Pyles (A.S.P.) Layout Editor: Anna Schiedermayer Assistant Editor: Victoria Bonutti Editor in Chief: Daniel Romeyn Davis (D.R.D.)
** Please note that the views held in the individual articles do not necessarily express the views of the whole staff. **
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~Mission Statement~ The Gadfly is an attempt to “bite the sleeping horse” in the spirit of Socrates. It is a student publication whose purpose is to facilitate discussion concerning campus and cultural issues as they pertain to students of Franciscan University. It aims to be a forum for open, well-thought out, and honest discussion towards the end of knowing and loving truth in its most robust sense.
To begin, I would like to thank you all for reading the Gadfly. I know that the Gadfly is not always the most popular thing on Franciscan University’s campus, however, I am constantly reaffirmed in my belief about the necessity of the Gadfly on this campus. The Gadfly exists for the students of FUS – is staffed wholly by students and all the articles present in the Gadfly are written by students. Therefore, if you read something that you disagree with in the Gadfly, do not hesitate to write and submit a rebuttal! This platform for open dialogue and debate is the very reason why the Gadfly exists. On another note, I would just like to remind the students of Franciscan University about the many blessing associated with our university being situated in Steubenville, Ohio. Primarily, the best aspect about our location here in the Ohio River Valley is our proximity to Pittsburgh. Pittsburgh is an amazing city. Recently, I had the chance to
drive into Pittsburg on a lazy Sunday afternoon and to experience some of the highlights of the city. My two friends and I were only in the city for an afternoon, however, it was packed with many of the cultural gems that make Pittsburgh special. The three of us, who had traveled and studied together in Gaming, Austria in the Fall of 2010, were all impressed with what we saw. Primarily, the beauty of Heinz Chapel and the grandeur of the Cathedral of Learning, both of which are located at the University of Pittsburgh’s campus, impressed us most. We all came to the conclusion that another trip into Pittsburgh is certainly in due order for sometime in the near future. So as an ending note, I would highly encourage all those students who can, to go into the city sometime and just soak-in the cultural center that is Pittsburgh.
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In Christ, D.R.D.
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Escaping the Political, Leaping Into the Philosophical Often, I have found myself at a loss for words when approached by Catholics who passionately support political candidates. I understand the need for preferences or opinions and the like, but such individuals lose a certain sense of being a “Catholic”. To clarify what I mean, that we forget that our Faith comes before anything else and it is most often overwhelmed by the sway of the political sphere. The question is not whether we have a more Conservative candidate in the running, it should be the candidate that most conforms to the Catholic mindset regardless of whether or not they are Catholic. This may seem to be an ambiguous distinction or something obvious, but what I am asking of Catholics is to look at the issues, whether they are political, social etc., through the perspective of Catholicism. It’s not enough to try and be a Conservative, simply because it seemingly conforms the most with the Catholic faith. Instead, I am proposing the idea of maintaining a ‘philosophically Catholic’ perspective. What I mean by the term “philosophically Catholic” is a mentality that scrutinizes the world through a Catholic lens, which I should not have to elaborate since I assume you, the reader, attend Franciscan University. Now, in saying all of this, I am not trying to get away from trying to engage society. We must, in fact, interact with society, since that is our foremost vision. How we should accomplish our duty is from a much firmer Catholic standpoint. Here at the University we complain and hold account-
able those ‘catholics’ who don’t follow the Church, (i.e. Nancy Pelosi or John Kerry) or are very quick to call out individuals, yet we forget that because we so often put our political mind next to or even before our Faith, it is then harder to maintain such a clear perspective when keeping the former rather than the latter. Would it not be more proper to allow our mentality of being Catholic to flow into everything we do? We are called to Love, which is our foremost duty to maintain, of which through Loving all else extends and comes from. Personalism, the philosophy upheld by Bl. Pope John Paul II, is one of the many Catholic philosophies we have, yet it remains ignored by those in the political sphere. We could properly engage the political forum with a mentality in which we would be able to determine the correct standpoint if we use something like a Personalist philosophy to guide us.
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Professor Quotes of the Week:
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I’m not saying that we should excuse ourselves from the political sphere; we must take part in political parties, with our Catholicism explicit in our actions and words. This of course would never have us saying we are Catholic and conservative on the same level. Politics is our interaction as social beings with the polis, which is indeed necessary, though what I have striven to explain with this article is our differentiation between keeping our Faith at the forefront and politics as merely a means
"It's not like you accidentally make a wise choice." ~Prof. Chris Padgett
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and the objective world of values. In pursuit of a subjectively satisfying end, obtaining the end leads to boredom, and pursuit of it causes restlessness in the individual. If you look at Voldemort in pursuit of the Sorcerer’s Stone, the guy is clearly restless. I mean please, he implanted his face on the back of Quirrel’s bald to survive. Who does that? To be fair, we never see Voldemort actually acquire the stone, so we have no way of telling if he would have become bored upon attaining it, BUT we do know that there was an incredible amount of tension when he didn’t have it, no? Rowling must have been paying attention during that
St. Etheldreda, pray for us!
class. Parallel #3 Dr. Harold asserts that the body and soul are distinct, yet still united. For one, the soul animates the body, but is not reduced to it. Two, and I quote from Dr. Harold, “We experience our body from within…a feeling for our hands, skin, organs… hunger, thirst, having to go to the bathroom…etc.” Back to Voldemort, when Harry touched Voldemort’s face (which, for all intents and purposes is his body) at the end of Sorcerer’s Stone, Voldemort’s face totally shattered, but his soul flew off into the abyss. At the end of Deathly Hallows,
Voldemort’s soul remains, distinct from his body, curled in the fetal position underneath a bench at King’s Cross station. In both cases, the body’s gone, the soul’s still there. Body and soul are distinct after all. But Voldemort never had to go to the bathroom, so maybe he doesn’t have a soul after all. Either way, the evidence is there, and I’m casting my vote for team HaroldRowling. A dynamic duo, I daresay. ~ Mary Kineke
to the end, which should be Truth and Goodness. Being Catholic is something that we do not proclaim nor keep private, it is something that pervades our being as a Faith should. While keeping heart and mind it would have the chance to change society more surely than voting for inconsistent politicians that ‘maintain’ ‘Christian’ viewpoints. A.S.P.
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“Heil Hitler!” salute, a twohanded ‘Heil Hydra!’. Eventually, Schmidt is killed in an ironic-ifpredictable twist involving his own Viking magic. As for the good Captain, he sacrifices himself for the greater good of mankind and is thrust into the surface of the North Pole, only to be woken up in the present day by a now-all-too-familiar Nick Fury (seriously, is this guy’s only job to make Super Hero house calls?). In the end, the movie ended up being pretty much exactly what I suspected it would be: an effect driven and generally unoriginal origin story setting up yet another character for the already hyped-up ‘Avengers’ movie. Something about the film really bothered me though. The fact that almost all of the genuine Nazis had been replaced by the Power Rangers-
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esque “Hydra” soldiers clarified a problem I’ve been having with our culture for a while. I feel like maybe, just maybe, we’ve forgotten who Hitler really was. Let me explain what I mean: A few years ago, I was privy to a conversation some friends of mine were having with a seemingly “cooler” upperclassman. The gentleman was telling us about how he planned to get Auschwitz –style numbers tattooed on his arm (the reason was actually admirably wellintentioned, but essentially irrelevant to my story). To my dismay, the rest of the group saw nothing wrong with this plan and seemed entirely impressed by what he was saying. Doing my best to not appear rude, I asked him if he thought that, perhaps, some might find his tattoo offensive. Met with blank looks, I proceeded to explain to the group about the Nazis, the camps, and the mindless
slaughter of millions of Jews, travelling people, Catholics, non-whites, and countless others. The others were fittingly shocked and appalled, but none of them were as shocked about this new information as I was that none of them had heard any of this before. Aside from a loose cultural knowledge of Hitler and World War II, all the finer details of the atrocities had been, until this point, entirely lost on them. Now, obviously, I understand that this was an isolated incident. The majority of people, no matter how isolated, have at least a basic understanding of the Holocaust and the events surrounding it (I hope?). The problem is, at least in my opinion, that everyone is getting their Nazi info from movies, TV, and conspiracyriddled History Channel specials. An oft-repeated story Continued on page 6
The Classics?! "I could easily forgive HIS pride, if he had not mortified MINE." ~ Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
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St. Idisdore the Farmer, pray for us!
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goes that Mel Brooks once said that his mission would be to make Hitler the most laughed at figure in history. While this is a respectable goal, I feel that maybe it’s worked too well. Don’t get me wrong, I love a good showing of ‘The Producers’ as much as the next guy, but it seems that, somewhere between the Hitler Raps and the “Hitler reacts…” videos, we lost something. Things that make light of Hitler, Nazis, etc. are funny insofar as they aren’t funny. What I mean to say is, part of what makes things of that nature humorous is the element of “that’s sooo wrong”. The problem is that, with WWII-themed movies, videos, and TV shows everywhere, (for Heaven’s sake, Holocaust films are now their own genre), we’ve become desensitized to them.
We’ve lost the “that’s sooo wrong” factor so much that Hitler is now more of a mildly frightening cinematic Bogeyman than a chillingly real human being. It’s exactly like how Satan, the very image of evil, became a humorous character due to the Harlequin masks and puppet shows of Ye Olden Days. Somewhere along the line, Satan stopped being an instantly recognizable symbol of evil and became something that people found appropriate to put in SNL sketches (“The Devil” is a correspondent on SNL’s “Weekend Update”). On top of this, society is riddled with imbecilic concepts like “Godwin’s Law” that stop people from intellectually connecting the atrocities of the Holocaust to anything else. When people hear of China’s One Child Policy
or the forced-extradition and sterilization of Travelling Peoples by the EU, they’re unable to make the connection to the Holocaust due to the societal stigma against it. So listen, I’m not trying to make Nazis out of molehills (did I just confuse my analogy…?) but there is some truth to what I’m saying. Obviously it’s all well and good to appreciate a wide variety of WWII-inspired media, be they comedies or dramas, but let’s not forget what it is they’re based on, as well as the full impact of that truth. In the words of the poet and philosopher George Santayana, "Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to fulfill it". ~ Jacob Popcak
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Hippie Joe and Holy Jane Advice Column Dear Hippie Joe and Holy Jane, I don’t know where to start…I am just so thrilled. So freshman dance, this good-looking, great, and holy guy asked me to slow dance. It was so beautiful, he was so wonderful, and then we went on a night walk. I think I’m in love. Only thing is, we are both freshmen. My friends say that it is not a good idea to date this early on in our college careers and that sorta makes sense. In spite of that I really want to date him. The one conversation we had was so amazing…I love that boy. What should I do? Sleepless in Tommy More (kinda like Sleepless in Seattle) Hippie Joe: Ummm . . . wow. . . that’s all I have to say. Holy Jane: The M.R.S. degree in-sight and only freshman year! Have you said a novena to make sure if this is God’s Will? While there is nothing wrong with enjoying a night walk with a handsome prospective future husband, it’s not prudent to jump-start a relationship just yet. Not saying a relation-
ship won’t develop or work out, you never know. Have more than one conversation with him and get to know him more as a friend. Also, focus on orientating yourself to the college life (it is only freshman year), check out some households, and talk late into the night with the girls on your wing. Trust me, that amazing man won’t be going anywhere off this hill, not with this male-female ratio. The four-year influence of Franciscan will only transform him more into a holy man. If God truly has this man picked out to be your special someone, then it will be, so just wait on the Lord. Remember the course of true love never did run smooth,
Hippie Joe and Holy Jane
If you have any quibbles, comments, or questions about anything, please feel free to express your opinion to the Gadfly or email us @ askjoeandjane@gmail.com. We want to your questions!
Pop Culture Cinema Quote: “The point is, don’t lose your dinosaur… don’t lose your dream!” Step Brothers (2008)
j|Çx? j|à tÇw jtzzxÜç A Slightly Less than Modest Proposal* According to modern researchers, there are roughly 100 million gingers living in the world today. Currently, there are roughly 50 million poor people living in America alone. The mass slaughter of these gingers would not be enough to fix poverty, but it would be an excellent first step to helping the world grow one step closer to eradicating poverty and general mischief and sin in the world. Also, with the amount of hungry people, these gingers could be used as a food source. The human body is an excellent source to live off of. In America, many of us live a life of indulgence. We enjoy our 99-cent cheeseburgers and our $1.25 soda pop beverages. We enjoy pinching our pennies and gorging ourselves meaninglessly every day of the week. And none of us like those conniving gingers that are parasitically leeching off of society and stealing our souls away to fill the dripping buckets of their own souls. So, to aid us, and our fellow man, I propose that we slaughter all of the gingers and give their bodies to the poor and hungry. Currently living in the world there are 925 million hungry people. Obviously none of us want to spend the time and effort to help these poor and starving people be fed, for that would deprive us of our ability to indulge ourselves on gratuitous amounts of food and spend money on things that we don’t need. After some menial kindergarten level calculations, I have discovered that if we were to kill all of the gingers, we could feed all of the hungry people in the world for 37 days. Also, the
pelts of these monstrosities could be used to clothe those who cannot afford clothing and feed those who are too tired to work. Also, the remainders of the bodies and the scraps could be burned to provide warmth for those who have no warmth or shelter. If we use this month of feeding properly, then we can get these people back to a state that they can work in. The poor in America would be so grateful that they would gladly do any work that we provide for them. And the hungry in other countries could be taught proper farming and would not be so starving that they can’t work. This labor that they provide would also help bolster the American economy. If America backed this project then the people that we helped would provide America with goods that they learn to produce from our generosity. My final points stem from the fact that gingers, contrary to popular belief, do not actually have souls; not human souls, anyway. Since they do not have souls, Christians should have no qualms with sacrificing them for the betterment of mankind. Gingers, being soulless creatures, were placed on this earth by God to feed the populace. If we keep some of them alive, we could even produce Ginger Farms. Since the average homo-sapiens couple can produce one child every year, breeding them would not be difficult. If we kept a few of the males alive and selected appropriate females for breeding purposes we could also allow these poor people to begin Ginger Farms. The appeasement of the Sun God is my final proposition. The red
hair of the gingers, and the freckles on their faces, clearly show that the Sun has marked them as victims. The fact they burn easily shows his hatred towards them. The wrath of the Sun God appears to us in a unique way; he hides away and allows us to suffer because of the vileness of the gingers. If we sacrifice these gingers, he will be pleased and will bless the world with good weather, and allow us only the appropriate amount of rain, and great sunshine whenever it is not raining. He particular enjoys the Ginger Virgins. If we start Ginger Farms, we could capture select female gingers to sacrifice as virgins when they reach the appropriate age. All in all, since American citizens, and the citizens of the world, are becoming self-indulgent and do not want to provide aid to the poor and destitute in the world, and we would rather spend all of our time and effort doing nothing but supporting ourselves in this vilely capitalist society, then we should just murder all of the gingers, since they are the root of all evil. Killing these gingers would perpetually protect the weather and end world hunger and poverty across the globe. ~ The Q.
*The above is an exercise in satire and is NOT to be taken seriously. The Gadfly does not approve of the sacrifice of gingers... even if they do lack human souls.