ON THE PORCH a call back to community

by joshua cole

Fredericksburg has always been home for me, well, Falmouth, but if you grew up here you know most of this area was referred to as Fredericksburg. I grew up in a small little neighborhood where on our little street, all the neighbors knew each other, and we kept each other accountable. If I was caught outside doing something I wasn't supposed to, Mrs. Washington, next door, would take me to my grandmother. If I was teasing another child, Mrs. Anthony, up the street, could tell my mom what happened. Today, one wouldn't dare 'tattle' on a child in the neighborhood, but back in the late 90's that was COMMUNITY. Something I think we lost today. Don't get me wrong, we certainly have communities - but we lack the concept of community.

The word community is a compound word, from common and union. The Latin term, communitas translates as "the same" or "public, together". A sense of community means that we all belong together, and we all have a common responsibility to each other Your well-being equals my wellbeing. Communities are essential because they provide us with a sense of belonging and offer support and protection to us. Communities could be our jobs, our circle of friends, our neighborhoods, our faith communities, etc.

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We certainly have these groups we belong to but how much do we really belong? We attend meetings, we worship on our holy days, we hang out at the bar, or we travel together - but do we have common union? I would suggest that we do, but often we don't really capitalize on what surrounds us. Building community requires first and foremost a sense of belonging If I don't feel like I'm welcomed, how can I feel a sense of community. A sense of belonging must be fostered by everyone and by the individual, it requires, sometimes, effort to be a part. Communicate with those in your circles or communities. Not just communicating when you must - but communicating often, checking in on each other, being genuinely concerned about each other's lives, and offering sincere help and emotional support. The more we effectively communicate, the more we can feel a sense of belonging. The more we prove ourselves to be a haven for communication, the more others will communicate with us!

Once we feel like we can belong, community also calls us to collaboration! If I can communicate with you, I feel like I can trust you. Once I feel like I can trust you - I want to be able to work, partner up, and succeed with you! If we are considering the various communities, we belong to - consider the goals and plans that your community can achieve. Maybe it's your neighborhood and a friendly neighborhood tutoring for the kids. If parents have communicated with each other, shared the need to help their kids excel in school - then communication has happened, collaboration is on the brinkand BOOM a plan is formed and followed out - and kids all down the street meet at various houses for tutoring and, *read this part out loud* COMMUNITY!

You have successfully communicated, collaborated, and now it's time to invest to ensure these practices continue. Community requires work. That's the hard part. We all must do our share to ensure community thrives. If you're a lay leader within a house of Faith, you are carrying the vision of the faith leader, the overarching Faith goal, and the goal of the house of Faith as a wholethese all require consistent work and effort. If you're in a group of friends, communicating, remembering each other's birthdays, being careful not to push each other's buttons - these are all ways we invest in our community of friendship. Investing is the opportunity we must put our own time, effort, money, or emotions into a situation, or community, for us to buy in. This requires everyone's participation; it cannot be one-sided. One person in a community cannot do all the investing, we all must invest for our community to thrive.

I want to share a few final thoughts. I listened to a preacher quote Psalm 133 recently, but he added his own spin. He stated, "How good and pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in UNITY not uniformity!" As we build communities, it's key to understand - communities should be safe spaces Not places of assimilation We all bring unique opportunities and gifts when we bring our individuality to communities - allow each person to shine and collaborate Secondly, community is more than just what's outside our doors. Yes, that is our community, but community is whatever is connected to us via common union. Mama Bear groups, Churches, PTA, the nerd group you joined on Facebook - these are all communities we have aligned with, and it's our job to communicate, collaborate, and invest for these communities to thrive! Let's thrive together!

Let's thrive together: read Front Porch cover to cover!

Rev. Joshua Cole is a former State Legislator and candidate for Delegate in HD-65.

Last month, I had the pleasure of visiting Schwetzingen, Germany upon the invitation of Lord Mayor René Pöltl and among a delegation of 17 Fredericksburg guests, including: my husband, Fred Edwards; Councilman Matt Kelly and his wife, Cindie; SFA Vice President Kimberly Chronister; Brenda and Eric Martin; Cathy Herndon; Miranda Reynolds, Odile Pryor; Edda and Wayne Davis; Nancy Moore and Roger Engels; Rex and Audrey Bishop; and Sue and Rick Henderson

Fredericksburg and Schwetzingen share many similarities. Just as