MADE IN AUSTRALIA FUSEMAGAZINE.COM.AU JUN / JUL 2018
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LIFE LOVE EQUALITY
OUR SAME SEX WEDDING PHOTO FEATURE
THE GAY WEDDING CAKE DILEMMA
+ MARRIAGE & MONEY
GAY MALES MOST LIKELY TO LAST THE DISTANCE PATTI LUPONE ON TOUR
> TRUE LOVE STORIES NEVER HAVE ENDINGS
WHY SEX IS SO VITAL TO ENSURE ENDURING AND SUCCESSFUL RELATIONSHIPS GAY CONVERSION THERAPY IS STILL HAPPENING IN AUSTRALIA MY SUPERMAN A MILLENNIAL’S MUSINGS ON MARRIAGE
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MADE IN AUSTRALIA FUSEMAGAZINE.COM.AU JUN / JUL 2018
MADE IN AUSTRALIA FUSEMAGAZINE.COM.AU JUN / JUL 2018
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57
LIFE LOVE EQUALITY
57
OUR SAME SEX WEDDING
OUR SAME SEX WEDDING
THE GAY WEDDING CAKE DILEMMA
THE GAY WEDDING CAKE DILEMMA
PHOTO FEATURE
WHY SEX IS SO VITAL TO ENSURE ENDURING AND SUCCESSFUL RELATIONSHIPS
+
GAY CONVERSION THERAPY IS STILL HAPPENING IN AUSTRALIA
MARRIAGE & MONEY
FUSEMAGAZINE.COM.AU
LIFE LOVE EQUALITY
GAY MALES MOST LIKELY TO LAST THE DISTANCE
MY SUPERMAN A MILLENNIAL’S MUSINGS ON MARRIAGE
PATTI LUPONE ON TOUR
> TRUE LOVE STORIES NEVER HAVE ENDINGS
FREE
PHOTO FEATURE
WHY SEX IS SO VITAL TO ENSURE ENDURING AND SUCCESSFUL RELATIONSHIPS
+ MARRIAGE & MONEY GAY MALES MOST LIKELY TO LAST THE DISTANCE
GAY CONVERSION THERAPY IS STILL HAPPENING IN AUSTRALIA
PREP NOW ON THE PBS
> TRUE LOVE STORIES NEVER HAVE ENDINGS
MY SUPERMAN A MILLENNIAL’S MUSINGS ON MARRIAGE
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FUSE MAGAZINE MADE IN AUSTRALIA JUN / JUL 2018
02 Editor’s Rant 04 What’s On : Movies 07 What’s On : Events & Shows
EXECUTIVE EDITOR Alexander Thatcher CREATIVE DIRECTOR & ASSOCIATE EDITOR Christopher Powell ASSISTANT EDITOR Maxwell Elliff CONTRIBUTING EDITOR Danny Corvini CONTRIBUTORS Dwayne Lennox Scott Malcolm Rose Pappalardo Liam Elphick Marguerite Johnson James Bennett Ivan Hinton-Teoh
24 FUSE FEATURES 24
14
The gay wedding cake dilemma. Should business owners be able to discriminate against LGBTIQ customers solely because of their personal religious views?
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10 Fab Things : Stuff We Love 13 Round Up : News & Politics
CONTACT FUSE 0412 309 992 hello@fusemagazine.com.au fusemagazine.com.au PO Box 844 Belconnen ACT 2616 PUBLISHER Published + designed by Lithium Innovation Pty Ltd lithium.net.au ISSN 1836-8387 All rights reserved. No part of the magazine may be reproduced in whole or in part without written permission from the publisher. The appearance, mention or likeness of any person or organisation in editorial or advertising in no way suggests sexual or political orientation. Photographs used to illustrate editorial do not depict the real lives, behaviour or sexuality of the models. Opinions expressed in the magazine are not necessarily those of the FUSE publisher, editor or staff. Any health, fitness or dietary advice contained in this magazine is for informational purposes only. Consult your physician and a fitness/health professional before changing your diet, doing any exercise program, or taking any supplements or remedies of any kind. Some articles in this publication may have first appeared on theconversation.com. Submissions of text, photographs or any other material will be taken as consent to publish said material.
26 29 29 Find out why experts say sex is so vital to ensure an enduring and successful relationship.
21 22 32 39 45
Op.Ed : My Superman Couch Potato : Film & TV Money Shot : Marriage & Your Back Pocket Community : My Same-Sex Wedding Out & About : Big Gay Breakfast
35 35
Gay conversion therapy is still happening in Australia and it’s time to put an end to it once and for all.
39 47 Stargazer : Your Horoscope 48 Dear Rose FUSECONTENTS
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❤ EQUALITY FOR ALL GAY MARRIAGE, RELIGIOUS FREEDOM AND CONVERSION THERAPY. In December last year, Australia officially become the 26th country to legalise same-sex marriage after an indisputable win in the Federal Parliament. Most of us thought that this meant that the rights of LGBTIQ people would finally be respected — sadly this has not happened. Over the past few months, Christian fundamentalists have been pushing to water down discrimination laws in the name of “religious freedoms”, attacking the rights of trans people and even openly discussing the merits of ‘gay conversion therapy’.
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It started the moment Australia overwhelmingly said yes to marriage equality with religious conservatives like David van Gend from the ‘Australian Marriage Forum — Think of the Child’ releasing a statement saying: “We accept that same-sex marriage will now become legal, but it will only be a legal fiction. It will forever remain untrue, unjust and unnecessary. Untrue to nature and timeless culture; unjust to those future children who will now be compelled, by an Act of Parliament, to miss out on their mother or father; unnecessary, since same-sex couples already have the same legal status and benefits as any other couple in Australian law.” Unfortunately organisations like ‘Australian Marriage Forum’ and ‘The Coalition for Marriage’ are still blindly convinced that marriage equality puts children, freedom of speech and religious liberties at risk — even though the majority of Australian disagree and there is absolutely no evidence supporting this belief. David van Gend further stated, “We will now do what we can to guard against restrictions on freedom of speech and freedom of religion, to defend parents’ rights, and to protect Australian kids from being exposed to radical LGBTIQ sex and gender education in the classrooms.” Even more bizarre is that conservative individuals have again been discussing the merits of ‘gay conversion therapy’ — and this has really shocked Australians. I’m not sure what they expected, but the shit really did hit the fan when this made news headlines, and it has now been revealed that gay conversion practices — cloaked in the terminology of “self-improvement” or “spiritual healing” — has been hidden in evangelical churches and ministries, taking the form of exorcisms, prayer groups or counselling disguised as pastoral care. The good news, of course, is this has exposed this heinous practice and within weeks of it making headlines both the Victorian and ACT Governments have made moves to ban the practice entirely. It’s disappointing that we still have to battle so all people to have the fundamental right to exist as they are, and sadly we can’t rest just yet. Alex 2
EDITOR’SRANT
2017/18 LGBTIQ BUSINESS & COMMUNITY DIRECTORY GRAB YOUR COPY TODAY! The FUSE LGBTIQ Business & Community Directory is an easy way to find businesses and organisations who choose to support our community. The directory also includes an extensive range of essential community services and LGBTIQ social and sporting groups. directory.fusemagazine.com.au
Scan this QR code to jump straight to the directory online FUSEMAGAZINE.COM.AU
3
MOVIES
DID YOU KNOW? George Lucas originally wanted Han Solo to be a large, green, gilled fish monster, but eventually changed the character’s description to “young Corellian pirate”.
SOLO: A STAR WAR STORY OPENS 24 MAY Some fans may not have been happy with the fate of Harrison Ford’s iconic Star Wars character in The Force Awakens, but it was probably foolish to think that Disney would let Han Solo go that easily. Here then we have an origin story of sorts, with Alden Ehrenreich (Hail, Caesar!) playing the young Solo about to embark on the first of many action-packed and illegal adventures. Contrary to his name, he’s joined by a rag-tag crew, including Woody Harrelson, Donald Glover and Emilia Clarke, not to mention a certain 190-year-old Wookie. Ron Howard (Apollo 13) is at the helm of this space adventure.
OCEAN’S EIGHT OPENS 7 JUNE If you’re one of those man-babies who got your boxer shorts in a bunch over the 2016 Ghostbusters, then you may want to give this film a miss. Not a reboot or remake so much as a spin-off, Ocean’s 8 sees Debbie Ocean (Sandra Bullock), sister to George Clooney’s Danny, released from prison and on the lookout for her next big score. But she’ll need a crack team if she’s going to crack New York’s Met Gala: cue Cate Blanchett, Sarah Paulson, Helena Bonham Carter, Mindy Kaling and Rihanna. Their target? The million-dollar jewels worn by Hollywood heavyweight Daphne Kluger (Anne Hathaway). Gary Ross (Hunger Games) directs what promises to be a whole lot of fun.
DISOBEDIENCE OPENS 14 JUNE FUSE MOVIE PICK OF THE MONTH!
2018 is proving to be a bumper year for Chilean director Sebastian Lelio. Beginning the year by winning the Foreign Language Film Oscar for transgender drama A Fantastic Woman, and looking to end it with an American remake of his own 2013 film Gloria (this time starring Julianne Moore), Lelio also has this forbidden love drama, set in London’s Orthodox Jewish community and starring Rachel McAdams and Rachel Weiss, which has already wowed critics and festival audiences. When Ronit (Weisz) returns to the Orthodox community that once shunned her, an old passion for her childhood friend, Esti (McAdams), is reignited.
ANT-MAN AND THE WASP OPENS 5 JULY Conspicuously absent from the battle in the recent Avengers: Infinity War, Ant-Man (the ever-youthful Paul Rudd) is back for his second solo outing, one which most likely takes place at the same time as the events in IW. Scott Lang (Rudd), the cat burglar-turned-superhero, this time around teams up with The Wasp, Hope Van Dyne (Evangeline Lilly), to tackle another dangerous mission — one relating to the past of Hope and her father scientist, Hank Pym (Michael Douglas). The surprise ending of IW, coupled with the presence of Michelle Pfeiffer, will no doubt have many Marvel fans intrigued as to what the little guy’s latest adventure has in store.
By Dwayne Lennox
FREE DENDY MOVIE TICKETS : Email us and tell us what you think of FUSE, comment on an article or sign up to the FUSE eNews and you could win free tickets to these fantastic movies. hello@fusemagazine.com.au
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HOTEL “ HIT PRODUCTIONS PRESENT
SORRENTO
OPENS
This is a real Australian family in a real Australian setting, a gentle psychological thriller that no Australian should miss.
18 JUL
BOOK NOW
6285 6290
Adelaide Theatre Guide
THEQ.NET.AU
“
BY HANNIE RAYSON
…a heartwarming tale of one family’s struggle with loyalty and self expression…
In Hotel Sorrento Hannie Rayson reaches into the heart of family relationships to reveal, gradually, the multiplicity of factors that both bring family members together – and drive them apart. A highly commercial and relatable comedy/drama this award winning play, which inspired the film of the same name, tells the story of three sisters who grew up together in the seaside town Sorrento.
Courier Mail
ADULT $54 CONC. GROUPS 8+ $49 U25 $25
WEDNESDAY 18 JULY 8.00PM • THURSDAY 19 JULY 10.30AM & 8.00PM FRIDAY 20 JULY 8.00PM • SATURDAY 21 JULY 2.00PM & 8.00PM
JURASSICA by Dan Giovannoni
OPENS 19 SEP
BOOK NOW
6285 6290
THEQ.NET.AU
Dan Giovannoni’s magical new play, Jurassica, weaves the past and present together, exploring what it is to migrate, to be displaced and to spend the rest of your life searching for home.
“
“
Jurassica has been patiently crafted, like Nonna’s perfect slow cooked pork! Anne-Marie Peard SMH
I am not fully Italian or fully Australian and despite ignoring my family heritage for a long time, I don’t think I can really understand my family unless I understand what they went through, how they were raised. Dan Giovannoni
WEDNESDAY 19 SEPTEMBER 8.00PM • THURSDAY 20 SEPTEMBER 8.00PM FRIDAY 21 SEPTEMBER 8.00PM • SATURDAY 22 SEPTEMBER 2.00PM & 8.00PM
ADULT $54 CONC. GROUPS 8+ $49 U25 $25
BOOKINGS 02 6285 6290 • THEQ.NET.AU 6
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WHAT’S ON
LGBTIQ Business & Community Directory Head to the FUSE LGBTIQ directory where you’ll find LGBTIQ friendly and owned businesses, community groups, sporting, social and support services. directory.fusemagazine.com.au
25 JUN
1 JUN
LGBTIQ Business & Community Directory Head to the FUSE LGBTIQ directory where you’ll find LGBTIQ friendly and owned businesses, community groups, sporting, social and support services. directory. fusemagazine.com.au
PATTI LUPONE DON’T MONKEY WITH BROADWAY
MONDAY 25 JUNE @ 8.00PM THE PLAYHOUSE, CANBERRA THEATRE Singer and actress Patti LuPone’s career in Broadway and Hollywood spans four decades. She is a multiple Tony and Grammy Award winner, inducted into the American Theatre Hall of Fame in 2006.
“Patti LuPone imparts the aura of a New York call act.” The New York Times
In Don’t Monkey with Broadway, Patti LuPone explores, through indelible interpretations of classic Broadway show tunes by the likes of Richard Rodgers, Lorenz Hart, Jule Styne, Stephen Schwartz, Charles Strouse, Leonard Bernstein, Stephen Sondheim, Cole Porter and Irving Berlin, how her life-long love affair with Broadway began and her concern for what Manhattan’s Theatre District — the Great White Way — is becoming today.
“Many try, but few have the knockout punch of LuPone.” The Washington Post
Few performers show the kind of dedication and commitment to their material, and to connecting with their audience. It’s little exaggeration to state that Patti LuPone has outdone herself with her new show, which debuted in New York to raucous cheers.
PANEL DISCUSSION PRIDE AND PREJUDICE: EXPLORING THE HISTORY OF LGBTQIA+ POLITICS IN AUSTRALIA FRIDAY 1 JUNE 6.00PM - 7.30PM NATIONAL MUSEUM OF AUSTRALIA
This year marks the 40th anniversary of the Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras. It has been a long struggle towards equality and inclusion but having achieved marriage equality, have we reached the end of the rainbow? Or is the fight for LGBTQIA+ rights just getting started? Join ABC RN Big Ideas presenter Cathy Van Extel and a distinguished and diverse panel to discuss the history of the gay and lesbian liberation movement, the often untold contributions of those from across the LGBTIQIA+ community and queer politics today. The panel features Robyn Laverack, 78er and Mardi Gras pioneer; the Hon Michael Kirby AC CMG, former Justice of the High Court of Australia; Jordan Raskopoulos, comedian and writer; and Associate Professor Shirleene Robinson, Department of Modern History, Macquarie University. This panel discussion is part of the Defining Moments in Australian History project, developed in collaboration with ABC Radio National. Cost: $15 adult, $10 concession, $7.50 Friends full members Bookings essential (fees apply). More details visit: nma.gov.au/pride-prejudice Image: Courtesy of Ron Muncaster.
CANBERRA DRAG RACE FINALE
SATURDAY 16 JUNE POLIT BAR, MANUKA
Patti LuPone is touring Australia and will be at the Canberra Theatre Centre 25 June 2018. CBR Tickets at: canberratheatrecentre.com.au NATIONAL TOUR DATES 21 June 23 June 25 June 27 June 30 June
Adelaide Festival Theatre Concert Hall, Sydney Opera House The Playhouse, Canberra Theatre Centre Conservatorium Theatre, South Bank Arts Centre Melbourne, Hamer Hall
16 JUN
The finale of the Canberra Drag Race takes place at the Polit Bar, featuring Canberra’s best up and coming drag queens. Hosted by Tammy Paks, Trixie Van Cartier. Details at: politbar.co WHAT’SON
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LGBTIQ Business & Community Directory Head to the FUSE LGBTIQ directory where you’ll find LGBTIQ friendly and owned businesses, community groups, sporting, social and support services. directory.fusemagazine.com.au
WHAT’S ON
12&14 JUN
6&7 JUL ‘IDEAL HOME’ FUSE MOVIE FUNDRAISER SYD : TUESDAY 12 JUNE @ 6.30PM DENDY NEWTOWN
CBR : THURSDAY 14 JUNE @ 6.30PM DENDY CANBERRA FUSE Magazine is proud to present two special movie screenings of Ideal Home and fundraisers for the AIDS Action Council in Canberra and ACON in Sydney.
“‘The chemistry between these two well established comedy actors is enthralling, providing many laughs throughout the film’ Very funny! A must-see film. 4 Stars” SYN Ideal Home is a lighthearted comedy about a gay couple who suddenly find themselves thrust into parenthood, that comfortably finds a home somewhere in the feel-good realm of 2006’s Little Miss Sunshine. More details: fusemagazine.com.au
RAINBOW RANTERS TOASTMASTERS
THE NAKED MAGICIANS FRIDAY 6 JULY & SATURDAY 7 JULY @ 8.00PM THE PLAYHOUSE, CANBERRA THEATRE Sleeves Up, Pants Down! Seen on London’s West End, in 200+ cities around the world, and by over 50 million on TV (NBC, ABC, FOX, iTV) — The Naked Magicians is undoubtedly the world’s funniest and naughtiest magic show! The show features magic, mirth and more than a touch of mayhem as these two hot and hilarious Aussie magicians say abracadabra and take magic to a whole new level.
“They are hot, mind-blowing and seriously hilarious. Five stars!” B105 FM This boisterous R-rated magic show strips away the top hats and capes, promising full-frontal illusions. Left without sleeves or pockets, their saucy magic is baffling and entertaining, bringing a new meaning to “now you see it”.
“Definitely the hottest ticket in town!” Australian Arts Review
Good magicians don’t need sleeves and great magicians don’t need pants. This show proves just that! Australian tour details: nakedmagicians.com CBR tickets at: canberratheatrecentre.com.au
The Rainbow Ranters Toastmaster Club is specifically for LGBTIQ people and their allies.
MAN UP
SUNDAY 24 JUNE NELLIE HALL, MELBA
Come join the Rainbow Ranters Toastmasters Club, where we develop public speaking and confidence skills with pride. We are a group of LGBTIQ people and allies who want to promote inclusion, build our community and have some fun along the way. Come join us on a journey as we develop public speakers with pride. All welcome. For more details and meeting times visit: rainbowranters.toastmastersclubs.org 8
WHAT’SON
24 JUN
Want to be a Drag King! You can learn all the basics of male impersonation and drag performance by Canberra’s Mr Green Teal and Ty Zahn. All aspiring Drag Kings most welcome. For more details search ‘Trybooking Man Up’. FUSEMAGAZINE.COM.AU
BMW 125i. M SPORT PACK AND METALLIC PAINT.
$49,900 DRIVE AWAY*
For a limited time only the athletic, agile and stylish BMW 125i could be yours for $49,900 drive away.* Prepare for the thrill of ultimate performance, truly connected. Visit Rolfe Classic BMW today.
Rolfe Classic BMW 2 Botany Street, Phillip. Tel (02) 6208 4111. rolfeclassic.bmw.com.au
LMD 17000534
Available on vehicles ordered between 01.03.18 and 30.06.18. While stocks last and cannot be combined with any other offer. Standard Order and Production lead times apply. Excludes fleet, government and rental buyers. *Drive away price is for a new BMW 125i Hatch with automatic transmission, M Sport Pack, metallic paint and no other optional extras. Based on a private owner with a good driving record. Drive Away includes 12 month registration, 12 months CTP, and Stamp Duty and Dealer Delivery. Price may vary according to individual circumstances. Please consult Rolfe Classic BMW for further details.
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DID YOU KNOW? The first mobile phone call ever was made on the 3 April 1973 by Motorola employee Martin Cooper on Sixth Avenue in New York City using the Motorola DynaTAC 8000x.
CHARGE YOUR PHONE WORLDWIDE If you are a frequent traveller, you’ve likely come across the dilemma that is powering up your devices overseas. With the variety of charging standards around the world, finding an outlet that’s compatible with your setup can be difficult and often stressful. Boasting capability in more than 150 countries, the OMNIA TA502 Travel Adapter is apparently the world’s smallest travel adapter and boasts a 5-in-1 interface that supports US/UK/EU/AU and USB-A standards. Its slide and lock plug design makes it easy to carry and charge. It even protects your device with its USB BC1.2 Intelligent Chipset Standard.
TATTOOS YOU CAN TAKE OFF Forget fishnets and garters. The Tattoo Tights Etsy shop sells dozens of original tattoo style designs in both opaque colours and sheer flesh tones for a particularly realistic look. Slip on a pair of tattoo stockings with a giant black peacock feather along one side, and you’ll have people asking if it’s real all day long. Tattoo tights are made of microfiber and come in full-length footed, thigh-high, and footless legging styles.
$50 @ stacksocial.com
$40 @ etsy.com.au
I WEAR MY SUNGLASSES AT NIGHT In 1984 Corey Hart famously sang about wearing sunglasses at night, which until now seemed somewhat ridiculous as wearing traditional sunglasses (at night) makes it almost impossible to see! BLUPOND Night Driving Glasses might have been just what Corey really needed. These 100% polarised glasses have an anti-reflective yellow coating that cuts down glare from oncoming cars and street lights, plus offer increased contrast and clarity making it easier to see at night. They can also be worn during the day as they are designed to cut and diffuse harmful sunlight and give you an enhanced, vivid outdoor experience. #CoreyHart $85 @ amazon or ebay
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COOLSTUFF
GEEKALERT! MARVEL THOR HAMMER TOOL SET You must be worthy in order to wield the great Thor’s hammer, but Marvel never mentioned any restrictions on Thor’s hidden toolset. This super geeky 44-piece tool set — a ThinkGeek creation — comes in a moulded case that looks like Thor’s hammer. Inside it has all your basic tool needs, including a hammer (duh), a tape measure, a level, a screwdriver, a wrench, a ratcheting wrench, and a utility knife. $130 @ thinkgeek.com
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You can change a child’s life! ACT Together is looking for people who can care for and provide a safe and stable home for a child. Call us today to find out how you can change the life of a child in our ACT community.
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ACT Together is a consortium of: • Barnardos Australia • Australian Childhood Foundation • Oz Child • Premier Youthworks • Relationships Australia ABN 18 068 557 906 I A Company Limited by Guarantee I Registered Charity | Models used to protect privacy | ACTT_17_01603
A Step Up for Our Kids Out of Home Care Strategy 2015-2020 is an ACT Government funded initiative
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PANEL DISCUSSION
EXPLORING THE HISTORY OF LGBTQIA+ POLITICS IN AUSTRALIA This year marks the 40th anniversary of the Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras. Join ABC RN Big Ideas presenter Cathy Van Extel and a distinguished and diverse panel to discuss the history of the gay and lesbian liberation movement, the often untold contributions of those from across the LGBTQIA+ community, and queer politics today. The panel features Robyn Laverack, 78er and Mardi Gras pioneer; the Hon Michael Kirby AC CMG, former Justice of the High Court of Australia; Jordan Raskopoulos, comedian and writer; and Associate Professor Shirleene Robinson, Department of Modern History, Macquarie University.
Friday 1 June, 6.00–7.30pm
$15 adult, $10 concession, $7.50 Friends full members Bookings essential (booking fees apply) Visit nma.gov.au/pride-prejudice Visions Theatre, National Museum of Australia This panel discussion is part of the Defining Moments in Australian History project. Developed in collaboration with ABC Radio National.
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ROUND UP
By Danny Corvini DID YOU KNOW? Homosexuality is still a sensitive topic in China, where traditional family values are strongly ingrained and the pressure to wed and continue the family line is unrelenting.
CHINA’S LGBTIQ COMMUNITY BEAT AN ONLINE BAN Facebook and Twitter are banned in China, so the local app Weibo is the leading social network in the vast country. But in April, Weibo banned ‘homosexual content’ in what was supposed to be a three month clean-up that also targeted violence and pornography. The crackdown backfired spectacularly as tens of thousands of users protested the LGBT ban by posting their photos with the hashtag #IAmGay and rainbow emojis. Weibo backtracked and withdrew their ban just three days later.
CRAIGSLIST PERSONALS ARE NO MORE You can still find plenty things for sale on Craigslist, but go looking for the popular personals and casual encounters section and you’ll be sadly disappointed. The raunchy section was removed in early May following the passing of the Fight Online Sex Trafficking Act (FOSTA) by the US Congress, which was designed to crack down on sex trafficking of children. Amidst fears that Craigslist would be held responsible if the personals were used for trafficking, the section was removed altogether. “Any tool or service can be misused,” Craigslist said. “We can’t take such risk without jeopardizing all our other services, so we are regretfully taking Craigslist personals offline. Hopefully we can bring them back some day.” ‘Missed connections’ remains online though.
LABOR TO BAN ‘GAY CONVERSION THERAPY’ The Australian Labor Party has declared that it will ban the practise of ‘gay conversion therapy’ if it wins government at the next federal election. The issue came to a head in April when the Victorian opposition leader Matthew Guy came under pressure by conservatives in his party to allow parents greater access to the so-called ‘therapy’. State party president Michael Kroger killed the idea before it was allowed to be debated and the national ALP subsequently called it a “dangerous and discredited” practise that would be outlawed as a matter of priority by an incoming Labor government.
EMMA GONZALEZ IN WASHINGTON Queer student Emma Gonzalez addressed tens of thousands of demonstrators at the anti-gun March For Our Lives rally in Washington in March. The speech lasted just under two minutes, as Gonzalez read the names of her slain Parkland classmates and described the effects of gun violence in emotional detail. Then Gonzalez stunned the audience by standing silent for four minutes and 26 seconds while she stared ahead — thus making a very effective point that that was all the time it took for gunman Nikolas Cruz to kill 17 students and wound 17 more.
PREP NOW ON THE PBS PrEP was added to the Pharmaceutical Benefits Scheme on 1 April and Australians can now buy the HIV-prevention drug over the counter at a chemist and gain up to 99% protection. A prescription is required to purchase PrEP and any GP can write it, not just a doctor at a sexual health clinic. The cost is $39.50 for a month’s supply and $6.40 a month for concession card holders. Participants in the EPIC-NSW trial that’s been taking place at the Canberra Sexual Health Centre and the Interchange Clinic have been advised that they can continue accessing free PrEP throughout the intended duration. NEWS&POLITICS
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ROUND UP
DID YOU KNOW? Ice hockey player Harrison Browne made history by becoming the first openly transgender person to compete for a professional North American team sport in October 2016.
ANDREW BARR NAMED ONE OF AUSTRALIA’S TOP 50 LGBTIQ LEADERS ACT Chief Minister Andrew Barr has joined the likes of Penny Wong, Dean Smith and Janet Rice on Australia’s top 50 LGBTIQ leaders list. Compiled by professional services firm Deloitte and Google Australia, the list aims to highlight the achievements of Australia’s most outstanding out leaders while helping to create a supportive workplace culture where we can feel free to perform at our best. Andrew Barr used the opportunity to highlight the importance of the Pride In Diversity program, an employer support program that specialises in workplace diversity and organisational change.
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TOM DALEY DIVES INTO BABY SHOWER British diver Tom Daley and his American screenwriter husband Lance Black have celebrated the news that they will soon be fathers with a baby shower, which they posted on Instagram. The cute couple announced on Valentine’s Day that they will be soon having a child thanks to a surrogate mother. Daley was recently on the Gold Coast to compete at the Commonwealth Games and said that “[Fatherhood] changes your perspective on so many different levels. I was on the way home from Australia and there was turbulence, and normally I’m completely fine but I thought “I’ve got a little child to look after, I can’t die!”
CANADIAN TRANS ATHLETE HARRISON BROWNE RETIRES FROM ICE HOCKEY
POPE TELLS GAY MAN THAT GOD MADE HIM AS HE IS
RUSSIA’S GAY POLICIES NOT A CROWD-PLEASER
Trailblazing trans hockey player Harrison Browne has announced his retirement from professional hockey on the back of last year’s inspiring league championship win by his team the Buffalo Beauts. The 25-year-old played was the first openly transgendered professional hockey player in the world and represented Canada in 2011. Last year, he was jointly-named the ‘Male Hero of the Year’ by Outsports alongside Texan trans wrestler Mack Beggs. The athlete will now focus on the transition that he’s had on hold for the sport.
Juan Carlos Cruz who suffered sexual abuse by priests in Chile has said Pope Francis told him in a private meeting that “God made you this way and he loves you.” Mr Cruz said the Pope apologised “in the name of the universal church” for abuse by Catholic clergy in Chile and was “very upset” during the nearly three-hour meeting in which the pontiff said: “I’m sorry.”
Unsurprisingly, Russia’s anti-gay policies are keeping some fans away from the soccer World Cup, which will be hosted across 11 Russian cities in June. Russia’s ‘homosexual propaganda’ laws are intended to ‘ban promotion’ of homosexuality to minors but they really “reinforce stigma and prejudice and encourage homophobia”, according to the European Court of Human Rights. Russian officials have stressed that rainbow flags will be allowed at the World Cup and that LGBT people will not be targeted. However, few LGBTIQ westerners feel reassured.
NEWS&POLITICS
“He was extremely kind, extremely gracious. It was an apology that was by no means fake or false,” Mr Cruz told the BBC.
FUSEMAGAZINE.COM.AU
CANBERRA SEXUAL HEALTH CENTRE We are a free, friendly, non-judgemental and confidential specialist sexual health centre. Knowing your status for STI, hepatitis and HIV allows you to reduce risk to your partners, get treatment early and stay well. Both walk-in clinic and booked appointments are available. Please call for an appointment to discuss options for PrEP.
PEP IN AN EMERGENCY If you think you have been exposed to HIV, PEP should be started as soon as possible, but may be taken up to 72 hours after the exposure. PEP is available at Canberra Sexual Health Centre, Canberra Hospital and Calvary Hospital Emergency Departments.
e entr lth C a e H xual W? ra Se O r e N b IV n UK at Ca ing H O p s n p Y o o f st ipti DO ays o rescr p w P e v E i et Pr ffect ost e can g m e You up! re th oing rEP a g P TI e r d a es ost S s an s m o m t n o s g gain Cond s dia on a s phili i t y c S e onth nd rot a m p a 6 t e s o e be ry 3 orrh s eve Gon till th s k c d e I ch ol an er ST re co d a i s s n om ld co Cond shou n e em activ y l l a Sexu
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ROUND UP
DID YOU KNOW? According to Reuters, Chinese gaming company ‘Kunlun Group’ purchased Grindr for $245 million. Grindr has 3.3 million daily active users worldwide, making it the largest gay dating mobile app.
DRAG QUEEN PROTEST
GRINDR SHARES HIV STATUS
A thousand drag queen protest will ‘greet’ US President Donald Trump when he visits the UK in July. The glittery protest is being organised by Manchester drag queen Cheddar Gorgeous to spectacularly demonstrate that the UK celebrates diversity. “Calling all drag kings, queens, queers and allies,” calls out the event page. “Due to the appalling way the Trump administration has regarded the rights and welfare of LGBTQI communities of the US, the idea of a Trump visit to the UK is unacceptable. Let’s get visible, stand with our sister’s, brothers and others in America, and show that we are a country that celebrates diversity.”
Fresh on the back of Facebook’s Cambridge Analytica scandal, it’s been revealed that hook-up app Grindr — recently purchased by Chinese gaming company Kunlun Group — has been sharing sensitive information about users’ HIV status, location, sexual orientation and sexual practises with third parties. Most of the information was freely posted by users onto their profiles. However, advocates say that sharing private information with third parties without a user’s specific consent amounts to a serious violation — and not even premium account holders’ information has been safely protected in this case. Grindr later issued an opaque apology saying that they would never sell users’ information.
CATE MCGREGOR SAYS SHE NOW SUPPORTS SAFE SCHOOLS
WRONG WAY — GO BACK BERMUDA Bermuda, a tropical British-territory in the North Atlantic, became the first place in the world to repeal same-sex marriage in February, after legalising it just a year earlier. Carnival Cruise Line, whose subsidiaries Cunard and P&O are registered in Bermuda, have offered “financial, civic and public relations support” to LGBTQI rights charity OutBermuda to fight the changes, as their cruise liners will no longer be able to marry same-sex couples anywhere on the planet, as they must abide by Bermuda law. OutBermuda is in the process of preparing their legal challenge and they are expecting more corporate support to follow. outbermuda.com 16
NEWS&POLITICS
She’s Australia’s best-known trans person but Cate McGregor managed to insult many in her community by opposing Safe Schools in 2016. An encounter with a trans man Charles O’Grady resulted in the change of mind, after the young playwright told McGregor how much he loathed her for her stance on Safe Schools and her life as a soldier. The former military officer and cricket commentator issued a lengthy statement apologising for her previous position on the antibullying program and admits that her previous opposition had helped to empower conservative writers such as Miranda Devine. “(O’Connor) found me incomprehensible,” she wrote. “A fascist at best — and a tool of the Australian Christian Lobby in its vile war on trans people at worst.” FUSEMAGAZINE.COM.AU
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ROUND UP
By Maxwell Elliff DID YOU KNOW? Homosexuality was not removed from the “Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders” until 1973. Symptoms included inappropriate clothing and sexual perversion.
ANTIBIOTIC-RESISTANT ‘SUPER GONORRHOEA’ FOUND IN AUSTRALIA
MALAYSIAN UNIVERSITY PRESENTS LGBTIQ CONVERSION FORUM
GAY MARRIAGES ARE LESS LIKELY TO BREAK UP THAN STRAIGHT ONES
The diagnosis of two Australian patients so far this year with a drug-resistant strain of gonorrhoea has sparked growing concern for the over use of antibiotics. Since 2014, the commonly prescribed method to combat the STI has been a dual-drug treatment involving ceftriaxone and azithromycin. But the newly discovered ‘super gonorrhoea’ is resistant to both of these, as well as every other routinely used antibiotic, leading health experts to warn of the potential for antibiotic-resistant bacteria to spread with no effective treatment available. Naturally, sexually active gay men are especially at risk, and with more and more fellas ditching condoms in favour of PrEP (which FYI doesn’t protect from gonorrhoea!), a new sexual health crisis may soon be on our doorstep.
In March, a Malaysian University held a forum with the aim of converting LGBT students. The Muslim Students Association of the Universiti Sains Malaysia organised the forum on their Facebook page to counter the spread of queer culture — which goes against the country’s dominant Islamic principles (homosexual sex being illegal and carrying a possible 20-year prison sentence). Speaking for the transgender rights group Justice for Sisters, Thilaga Sulathireh stated that, “The messaging was that LGBT people can be changed and LGBT is a form of sickness. That is harmful”. It’s a shame to think that while our country and many others have come so far regarding gay rights, many nations still have a long, perilous road ahead.
A recent American study has found that gay male couples have better odds of making it last than their lesbian and straight neighbours. The study, conducted by the Williams Institute at UCLA, tracked 500 couples in Vermont over 12 years and found that so-called ‘traditional’ marriages were one-and-a-half times more likely to end in divorce than marriages between same-sex attracted men. Perhaps we’re one step closer to putting to rest that age-old stereotype of the hard-partying, sex-addicted, ‘commitaphobic’ gay guy (think Brian Kinney in Queer as Folk) in favour of something a little more modern and diverse.
CATHOLICS WARN AGAINST ‘WINNER-TAKES-ALL’ APPROACH ON MARRIAGE EQUALITY A recent parliamentary inquiry has heard senior Australian Catholics warn that marriage equality should not be a case of ‘winner takes all’, following the resounding ‘YES’ verdict of the postal survey. Notably, Michael Casey representing the Australian Catholic University (ACU), told the inquiry that those with differing views on marriage should “live and let live” — although it seems that someone holding that stance would logically be in favour of marriage equality (but then again, Catholics aren’t necessarily renowned in that regard). Representatives from various religious institutions suggested that changing the Marriage Act had exposed the fragility of religious freedom protection. Such protections include the rights of religiously affiliated bodies such as schools and hospitals to discriminate against staff and clients based on sexual/gender identity. If they are worried that these protections have been destabilised by the ‘winner takes all’ mentality, I would be tempted to argue: to the victor belongs the spoils! NEWS&POLITICS
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MY
SUPERMAN A MILLENNIAL’S MUSINGS ON MARRIAGE
By Maxwell Elliff
SO… ARE YOU GOING TO GET MARRIED NOW? Since the glorious and long-overdue passing of same-sex marriage into Australian law last year (after enduring that ridiculously invasive and expensive political circle jerk otherwise known as the postal plebiscite), I have found myself increasingly asked one niggling question from my hetero friends, “So… are you going to get married now?” I am never quite sure how to respond. At 24 years of age, I consider myself far too young (not to mention far too single, unsorted, financially insecure, et cetera, et cetera…) to be thinking beyond where I’ll go drinking Friday night or which second-rate Netflix series to binge next. But lately I’ve been contemplating marriage and whether or not I see it happening for me somewhere down the track. Having been lucky enough to grow up in a relatively liberal and accepting country, I’ve pretty much always had the belief that samesex marriage in Australia was inevitably going to happen, it was just a matter of when. So in the back of my mind, I guess I’ve always thought that some day I would marry the man of my dreams (*cough* Tyler Hoechlin, pictured). But do I think I ever will, considering it is now a 100% legal reality?
The rainbow flag-wielding anarchist in me is tempted to say no. After all, the institution of marriage is rooted in the traditional patriarchal structures that have for centuries reinforced the heterosexual status quo and actively rejected queer lifestyles. Isn’t the great thing about the queer community the fact that we can, in a sense, make our own rules? Not to mention that a loving relationship can be perfectly valid without a piece of paper, and the minor fact that around 40-50% of marriages in the western world end in divorce anyway.
Gay marriage is not about two people being gay: it’s about two people who love each other and who have decided to commit to each other for the exact same reasons any other couple would get married. Luke Macfarlane — Canadian actor and musician
That being said, the hopeless romantic in me sees things differently. My own parents have been (mostly) happily married for 27 years, and my grandparents for over half a century — and neither seems to be untying the knot any time soon. So it’s fair to say I have positive marriages in my family to aspire to. Also, the majority of my close mates still have married parents, and I think they are better off for it. During high school a few of my friends had their parents’ divorces to deal with, and I couldn’t help but notice it having negative affects on them during an already tough stage of life. So from my own experiences, kids are better off when their married parents stay married. Therefore I guess my decision to ‘get hitched’ or not would all depend on whether I some day wanted to raise kids with a long-term partner. But that’s a question for another time! So for now, I’m going to be a fence sitter here and say I have no idea if I will get married in the future. But just like my straight peers, I have the choice — and that’s all that really matters.
Photo: American actor and heartthrob Tyler Hoechlin plays Superman in the television series Supergirl.
FUSEOP.ED
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}potato
DID YOU KNOW? Black Panther is often wrongly considered the first ever black superhero — however there was another superhero and crime fighter Lothar, Prince of the Twelve Nations who debuted in American newspapers three decades before the Black Panther.
MOLLY’S GAME
BLACK PANTHER
From A Few Good Men to The West Wing and The Social Network, screenwriter Aaron Sorkin has provided some of the most quotable lines from film and TV, and now the quickfire wordsmith turns his attention to directing. Aided by the star power and acting prowess of Jessica Chastain, Sorkin tells the story of Molly Bloom, the woman who at one time ran the world’s most exclusive high-stakes poker games. And then the FBI showed up. Idris Elba provides excellent support as Molly’s defence attorney, but this is well and truly Chastain’s film. As always, when she’s in the game always bet on red.
Not so much a blockbuster as a phenomenon, Marvel’s Black Panther roared its way to $1.3 billion worldwide, including $670 million in the US where it surpassed Titanic to be the #3 highest grossing film of all-time. Although introduced in Captain America: Civil War, Black Panther, or T’Challa (Chadwick Boseman), gets his solo outing and origin story of-sorts in this adventure set mostly in the African kingdom of Wakanda. Director Ryan Coogler’s world-building is impressive, backed by an excellent cast: Forest Whitaker, Angela Basset, Lupita Nyong’o, Daniel Kaluuya, and Michael B. Jordan as the villain with a personal grudge against the Wakandan throne.
LADY BIRD
2:22
Just the fifth woman ever nominated for Best Director in the Academy Awards’ 90-year history, Greta Gerwig’s solo directorial debut is a charming, heartfelt coming of age tale that is also slightly autobiographical. Lady Bird (Saoirse Ronan), as she has dubbed herself, is in her final year of high school and wants nothing more than to flee her working class Sacramento home for an east coast college. But grades, money and Lady Bird’s own attitude present major hurdles. It goes without saying that Ronan gives a terrific performance, matched by Laurie Metcalf as her put-upon mother. Both received Oscar nominations, along with Gerwig, for this wonderful film.
Not the first film to mix sci-fi and a Groundhog Day-like concept, this romantic thriller, directed by Paul Currie and shot here in Australia, sees air traffic controller Dylan (Michiel Huisman, Game of Thrones), a man with a penchant for patterns, begin to notice a series of unusual events occurring every day at the same time (no points for guessing when). Could it have something to do with Sarah (Teresa Palmer, Warm Bodies), whose life almost ended in a plane accident that Dylan helped to narrowly avert? Even if the central mystery doesn’t keep you intrigued, watching the photogenic pairing of Huisman and Palmer isn’t a bad way to spend 100 minutes.
ENTERTAINMENT ONE
USPHE
By Dwayne Lennox
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FILM&TV
WALT DISNEY STUDIOS HOME ENTERTAINMENT
ICON HOME ENTERTAINMENT
You’ll find all these titles at JB HiFi, online or at all good DVD outlets. Check out fusemagazine.com.au for DVD giveaway details. Reviewed for FUSE by Dwayne Lennox — thelennoxfiles.blogspot.com.au FUSEMAGAZINE.COM.AU
“The chemistry between these two well-established comedy actors is enthralling, providing many laughs throughout the film. Very funny. A must-see film!” SYN
IDEAL HOME MOVIE FUNDRAISER DENDY NEWTOWN TUESDAY 12 JUNE @ 6.30PM DENDY CANBERRA THURSDAY 14 JUNE @ 6.30PM
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FUSEMAGAZINE.COM.AU FUSE Magazine is proud to present two special movie screenings of Ideal Home to raise funds for the AIDS Action Council in Canberra and ACON in Sydney. Ideal Home is a lighthearted comedy about a gay couple who suddenly find themselves thrust into parenthood, that comfortably finds a home somewhere in the feel-good realm of 2006’s Little Miss Sunshine.
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By Liam Elphick
THE GAY WEDDING CAKE DILEMMA WHEN RELIGIOUS FREEDOM AND LGBTI RIGHTS INTERSECT WHAT IS DISCRIMINATION? Broadly, discrimination means treating a person less favourably because of a protected characteristic they possess, or imposing a condition on a person that will disadvantage them because of their protected characteristic. Protected characteristics include race, gender, age, and LGBTIQ status. Discrimination is unlawful in a range of areas, including employment, education, accommodation, and goods and services. These prohibitions enshrine the human right to nondiscrimination in Australian law, in particular for social groups that have historically been marginalised.
LAST YEAR, 61.6% OF AUSTRALIANS VOTED IN FAVOUR OF MARRIAGE EQUALITY, LEADING TO THE PASSAGE OF LEGISLATION TO ALLOW SAME-SEX COUPLES TO MARRY. In response to religious concerns and as a concession to ensure marriage equality would pass through parliament, Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull announced in November that former Liberal frontbencher Philip Ruddock would chair a panel to review Australia’s religious freedom protections. More than 16,000 submissions were received by the panel from December 2017 to February 2018. Though the terms of reference are broad, submissions made by key stakeholders such as religious leaders and Australian Marriage Equality focused largely on whether current anti-discrimination laws adequately protect religious freedom. The timing of the review, and Turnbull’s public statements linking the review to marriage equality, also makes it clear that LGBTIQ anti-discrimination laws, and religious exemptions to those laws, will be a particular focus.
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FUSEFEATURE
In every jurisdiction in Australia — territory, state, and federal — discrimination against a person on the ground of their sexual orientation is unlawful. Discrimination based on gender identity is also unlawful, while intersex status is only protected in some jurisdictions. With the exception of New South Wales and South Australia, religious belief is also itself a protected characteristic. This means that, for example, a person cannot be fired from a job simply because they are Christian or Muslim. The infamous “gay wedding cake” scenario is the most commonly raised example of LGBTIQ discrimination on the basis of religion. This is when a baker refuses to bake a cake for a gay wedding because of their opposition to same-sex marriage, based on their religious views. In doing so, the baker seeks to treat a gay customer less favourably than a heterosexual customer, in order to manifest their religious belief. If no exemption is applied, this would likely be unlawful discrimination.
FUSEMAGAZINE.COM.AU
THE INFAMOUS “GAY WEDDING CAKE” SCENARIO IS THE MOST COMMONLY RAISED EXAMPLE OF LGBTI DISCRIMINATION ON THE BASIS OF RELIGION.
WHAT IS A ‘RELIGIOUS EXEMPTION’? In addition to being a protected ground, religious belief has a particularly special status: it can be used to render discrimination against LGBTIQ people lawful through religious exemptions. Broadly, religious exemptions in Australian anti-discrimination laws can be categorised in three main ways: 1 Specific religious exemptions 2. Educational religious exemptions 3. General religious exemptions Specific religious exemptions relate to the appointment and training of priests and ministers. Educational religious exemptions apply to religiously affiliated schools. This means their employment decisions and provision of education can discriminate against LGBTIQ people. But most recent controversy has focused on general religious exemptions. General religious exemptions typically apply only to religious bodies, where their conduct either: a) Conforms to the beliefs of the religion; or b) Is necessary to avoid offending or undermining the faith of their members
As such, if a church discriminates against a person because of their LGBTIQ status, but their conduct falls within one of these two categories, their conduct is excused from anti-discrimination prohibitions. As an example, if a bakery run by the Anglican Church could establish that opposition to samesex marriage conformed to the beliefs of the Anglican Church, refusing to bake a gay wedding cake for that reason would likely be lawful.
DOES THE SAME TEST APPLY THROUGHOUT AUSTRALIA? Unfortunately not. There are significant differences under various state and territory laws. Victoria requires that the conduct be “reasonable”, and allows individuals to use the exemption rather than confining it to religious bodies. No other jurisdictions allow religious exemptions for individuals in relation to sexual orientation. Tasmania does not exempt discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation for any religious reasons.
FUSEFEATURE
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THE GAY WEDDING CAKE DILEMMA WHEN RELIGIOUS FREEDOM AND LGBTI RIGHTS INTERSECT
The Australian Capital Territory and Queensland require that both categories, rather than just one, be satisfied — the act must conform to the beliefs of the religion and must also be necessary to avoid offending the faith of religious members. Among many other jurisdictional differences, these inconsistencies can lead to significant problems where conduct stretches across state or territory borders. It also makes it difficult for people to understand where the boundary between lawful and unlawful conduct is.
HAVE ANY CASES CONSIDERED THESE EXEMPTIONS? Few reported court cases in Australia have considered these exemptions in an LGBTIQ context. This is largely because most discrimination complaints are resolved before going to court. Two key recent cases came to opposing views on how these exemptions may operate. In the Victorian case of Christian Youth Camps, a youth camp associated with the Christian Brethren Church refused an LGBTIQ youth suicide prevention group access to the campsite. The camp was unable to show that it was a religious body. It was also held that opposition to homosexuality could not be a “fundamental doctrine” of Christianity, because of widespread disagreement within the Christian faith on this point. However, in the NSW case of OW & OV, Wesley Dalmar Child and Family Care was able to legally refuse a same-sex couple access to their foster care services. This was because the organisation was considered religious in nature. It was able to establish that if the mission were “required” to appoint homosexual foster carers, this would be unacceptable to its members. These cases only illustrate how difficult it can be to determine whether a certain “belief”, such as opposition to homosexuality, is enough to excuse discriminatory conduct.
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FUSEFEATURE
WHERE TO NEXT? The Ruddock review provides a timely way for these inconsistencies to be resolved. The panel may suggest certain amendments to unify these laws, or even propose a more easily understandable test for religious exemptions. However, it is crucial that any changes to the law adequately balance the right to religious freedom and the right to non-discrimination. The right to religious freedom in reality comprises two rights: the right to hold a religious belief (which is absolute), and the right to manifest religious belief (which is qualified). Believing something does not usually impact on or harm anyone else, and that is why religious belief is already protected in most Australian jurisdictions. Expanding this protection to NSW and SA would be appropriate. Manifesting religious belief, however, often does harm others — and can undermine the right to non-discrimination. In the gay wedding cake example, the baker may privately believe homosexuality is wrong, which is not unlawful. But when that belief is manifested by treating the gay customer less favourably than a heterosexual customer, this causes harm and discrimination. It is in these situations that a balancing act is required. We must ensure that any additional protection of religious freedom does not further undermine the right to non-discrimination. Rather than one right trumping the other, the best path forward is that which maximises the potential of both rights.
FUSEMAGAZINE.COM.AU
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A Little Laser
Cosmetic Laser Clinic Jennifer Dromgold is the owner of a boutique laser clinic A Little Laser in Manuka. She provides safe, fast, high end medical grade treatments at affordable prices. Hair removal and skin rejuvenation treatments for people of all skin types. Jennifer’s experience spans over 10 years. Jennifer has clients ranging from gay boys and girls who want to be ultra smooth to people in the trans community who need a professional clinic that understands their needs. “As somebody that supports and understands the needs of GLBTI people I’m very keen to offer my services and help individuals look and feel better. I am excited and proud to be able to offer my clients individual treatment plans and give them the time they deserve in a boutique style clinic. I enjoy building an honest relationship with my clients and love having the opportunity to help people achieve results with their individual concerns.”
We believe it’s about more than just beauty... it’s about you!
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02 6232 6629 | alittlelaser.com.au New Studio: 42 Geils Court, Deakin ACT
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Sex
and happy relationships
SEX CAUSES INCREASED PRODUCTION OF OXYTOCIN, WHICH HELPS US FORM STRONG EMOTIONAL BONDS.
THERE ARE NUMEROUS STUDIES SHOWING HOW IMPORTANT SEX IS TO A SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE OR ANY LONG-TERM RELATIONSHIP. There are of course many types of sex and ways of being intimate with others, but sex with a partner who knows you intimately is often a much more passionate and connecting experience. When we’ve been together a long time, sex may sometimes seem like a chore or just about pleasure and getting off, but there are many reasons why sex in a long-term partnership is incredibly healthy for your mind, body and relationship. Here are five reasons why you shouldn’t let your sex life slide in a long-term committed relationship.
1. SEX WITH YOUR PARTNER KEEPS YOU CONNECTED Sex can be a very intimate and trust building experience, which can bring you closer to your partner, not just physically but also emotionally. Your bedroom chemistry can also improve the quality of your day to relationship and interactions. A sexless relationship can become an empty relationship. Over time it may leave you both feeling unfulfilled and lonely, which can bring a whole bag of problems. The fact is intimacy and sex help keep that fire burning and those hearts warm. If you find you are having difficulties finding the time or you’re feeling too tired or just uninterested, you may need to address some deeper issues in your life that maybe holding you back from a healthy sex life. Stressful jobs, fractious relationships, parenting and work can all combine to rob us of our desire. FUSEFEATURE
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Sex
and happy
relationships
2. REGULAR SEX HELPS KEEP STRESS IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP AT BAY The world has become a demanding place to exist in, so looking after our mental and physical wellbeing is of the utmost importance when it comes to having a happy life and indeed a happy long-term relationship. Sadly stress, anxiety and depression have become serious issues in our communities, and can take a huge toll on a relationship or marriage. Science shows that regular sex is something that can help. This is because endorphins and oxytocin are released by the body during sex and also at climax. These hormones are natural mood enhancers and stress relievers. Regular sex can also boost your self-esteem and foster a generally relaxed state afterwards, which is incredibly beneficial for a happy relationship. In addition to this, a study — which provoked a lot of controversy in 2002 — showed that people who were directly exposed to semen were less depressed. The researchers think this is because mood altering hormones in semen are absorbed directly into the body during oral and penetrative sex.
Sexual health note: We are not advocating that people abstain from using condoms.
SEX CAN LEAD TO A RELAXED AND STRESS-FREE STATE AFTERWARDS, WHICH IS INCREDIBLY BENEFICIAL FOR A HAPPY RELATIONSHIP.
3. SEX HELPS KEEPS YOUR ROMANCE ALIVE Sex may seem like it’s purely a physical activity but it also has a large emotional aspect to is as well. Sex causes our bodies to release oxytocin, which is often called the love hormone. Oxytocin in your systems creates a feeling of love and trust between partners. Of course, you don’t aways need to have penetrative sex to get those all-important feel-good hormones flowing. Communicate about your fantasies, go on date nights, massage each other or maybe explore bondage or experiment with other fetishes. Above all though, try and be creative with your lovemaking.
4. SEX KEEPS YOUR HORMONES BALANCED We’ve already mentioned that being sexually active will calm your body and mind, but apart from that it also helps your body maintain hormonal balance. This hormonal balance will help with any emotional problems like depression and anxiety.
5. SEX KEEPS YOU BOTH HEALTHY Sex can also benefit your overall health. Plus it can make you generally more fit and flexible depending on your activity level in the bedroom (or elsewhere). Regular sex with your partner acts as a metabolic and immune booster and can also fight the ageing process... and we all like that! This ensures that it not only keeps you and your partner healthy but also keeps your relationship and life vibrant and happy. So what are you waiting for, get naked, get creative and get happy? FUSEFEATURE
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MONEY AND MARRIAGE AVERAGE COSTS IN AUSTRALIA
WEDDING CLOTHING & OTHER ACCESSORIES $4,271
HOW DID MOST COUPLES PAY FOR THEIR WEDDINGS 18% 56% 60% 82%
CREDIT CARD PARENTS LOAN SAVINGS
SACRIFICES COUPLES MADE
5% MOVED BACK IN WITH PARENTS FLOWERS & DECORATIONS $2,896
10% SOLD THEIR CAR
20% PUT THEIR SOCIAL LIFE ON HOLD
CEREMONY $941
32% CHEAPER WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHY $3,983
FOOD, ALCOHOL & VENUE $18,683
12% DELAYED BUYING A HOME
THE AVERAGE AUSTRALIAN WEDDING COSTS $36,200
7% DELAYED HAVING CHILDREN
WEDDING BUDGETS ENTERTAINMENT $2,896
43% STAYED WITHIN THEIR BUDGET 35% BLEW THEIR BUDGET 18% DID’NT HAVE A BUDGET
6% DIDN’T MARRY DUE TO HIGH COSTS
STATISTICS COURTESY OF MONEYSMART.GOV.AU MoneySmart is ASIC’s website for consumers and investors. The MoneySmart website was created by ASIC to help you take steps to improve your personal finances. The impartial guidance and online tools allow you to be better informed when making financial decisions.
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MONEYSHOT
FUSEMAGAZINE.COM.AU
By Scott Malcolm Director of Money Mechanics
MARRIAGE AND YOUR BACK POCKET
AS UNROMANTIC AS I AM ABOUT TO SOUND, HAVING A PLAN IN PLACE AROUND HOW YOU ARE GOING TO PAY FOR YOUR WEDDING CAN MEAN THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN GREAT MEMORIES OF A WONDERFUL CELEBRATION AND A MAJOR DEBT HANGOVER! We all come at money with different values and beliefs. Having open, honest conversations about money and how you value it is important. Getting married can be expensive and may be one of the first and most important negotiations you do together as a couple. Here are few things to consider before the big day.
IF THINGS ARE TIGHT OR THE COSTS IMPACT ON LONG-TERM GOALS, ARE THE SACRIFICES WORTH IT? When it comes to your weddings it’s important to get the right balance between having that ‘amazing wedding day’ and not busting your bank account. Having to put your important life plans or goals on hold to fund the wedding process may not necessarily create the best outcome. Think carefully about how much money you intend to spend and if it could make life more difficult in the long run. Remember, weddings don’t necessarily have to be expensive affairs.
PLAN YOUR WEDDING DAY BASED ON YOUR NEEDS AND NOT ON SOCIAL PRESSURES I have seen clients spend as much as a house deposit on their ‘special day’. Spend within your means. Many couples have overspent and gone into debt just to impress others. An expensive wedding may bring more grief than it brought joy. Weddings can be cheap and still amazing if you’re creative and clever.
AIM TO SPEND LESS THAN THE AVERAGE According to the IBIS World Index, the average wedding in Australia costs $36,200. This statistic came before marriage equality. As our community has started to have ceremonies the expectation is that it will add up to $1 billion to the $4.7 billion dollar industry! We do know how to party after all, but don’t spend more than you can afford to get there!
MY WEDDING TIPS • Start the conversation early around wedding costs. • If parents are involved in helping fund your wedding make sure you know what money is available, any expectations, and if it needs to be paid back. • The priority should be your other life plans and goals rather than the one day in your life. • Set a spending plan and budget that you can afford to spend and stick to it. As a couple help keep each other accountable... without nagging! • Get more than one quote for things and be willing to ask for discounts. If you are able, don’t mention it is for a wedding. • Have an off season wedding. Mid week or Fridays, or holding it in winter could save you some money. • Cut back the guest list to those people who are important and close to you in life. • Save on decorations or food by getting family and friends involved to make or create things. • Spread out the bills over a few months so you can prepay and average out the expenses. With just a little bit of upfront planning — and some honest, open conversations about the money — by the time you get to your big day you can kick back, relax and enjoy the celebration without having to worry. If you need help in these areas talk to a professional. Start your journey to being free around your money and creating wealth with understanding.
Scott Malcolm has been awarded the internationally recognised Certified Financial Planner designation from the Financial Planning Association of Australia and is Director of Money Mechanics. Money Mechanics is a fee for service financial advice firm who partner with clients in Canberra, Melbourne and Sydney to achieve their life and wealth outcomes. We are authorised to provide financial advice through PATRON Financial Advice AFSL 307379. For more information email scott@money-mechanics.com.au or call 1300 772 643. The information provided in this article is of a general nature only. It has been prepared without taking into account your objectives, financial situation or needs. Before acting on this information, you should consider its appropriateness having regard to your own financial goals, objectives and personal circumstances.
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DOMESTIC VIOLENCE CRISIS SERVICE
PROVIDES SUPPORT WOMEN, MEN AND CHILDREN WHO HAVE BEEN SUBJECTED TO INTIMATE PARTNER AND FAMILY VIOLENCE WITHIN THE ACT • Crisis intervention • Legal Advocacy • Support to young people and their families • Support to men to address their use of family or domestic violence • Support groups for women and children • Security upgrades • Emergency accommodation • Safety Planning • Awareness, education and training • DVCS is an inclusive service working with children, young people and adults
24 HOUR CRISIS LINE
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Email: crisis@dvcs.org.au (8am to 11pm daily) dvcs.org.au • FB, Twitter, Instagram @DVCSACT
CERVICAL SCREENING
A SIMPLE TEST THAT COULD SAVE YOUR LIFE The Cervical Screening Test looks for HPV, the virus which can cause cervical cancer. If you have a cervix, are between 25 and 74 and have ever been sexually active you should get tested. Even if you have not been sexually active recently, or have been in a long term monogamous relationship, HPV can be dormant and become active again so testing is still important. This includes women who are same sex attracted and people who identify as transgender.
MAKE AN APPOINTMENT WITH ONE OF OUR EXPERIENCED NURSES TODAY 6247 3077 SHFPACT.ORG.AU
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SEXUAL HEALTH AND FAMILY PLANNING ACT
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GAY CONVERSION THERAPY IS STILL HAPPENING IN AUSTRALIA! Gay conversion therapy — the unproved practice which has caused death and extreme trauma to many people — is the term used to describe the attempt to change individuals from homosexual to heterosexual within religious contexts.
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CONSIDERED A MENTAL HEALTH DISORDER, SHOCK THERAPY WAS WIDELY THOUGHT TO BE A PATHWAY TO CURE THE HOMOSEXUAL
LESS THAN SIX MONTHS AFTER AUSTRALIA VOTED TO LEGALISE SAME-SEX MARRIAGE, THE TOPIC OF ‘GAY CONVERSION THERAPY’ HAS ONCE AGAIN MADE HEADLINES. It started again with a proposal to debate the socalled treatment at the Liberal Party’s State Council. It was quashed by party president, Michael Kroger. The debate was to include discussion of giving parents greater access to conversion therapy for their children to counsel them away from same-sex attraction or gender transition. Attempts to increase scrutiny of this “therapy” in Victoria, with a view to imposing legal restrictions, undoubtedly contributed to the proposal to debate the topic. Australia has a long history of intervention into people’s sexual orientations and gender identities, including conversion therapy. Yet this therapy has not received the same level of public scrutiny as it has overseas.
THERE IS NO SCIENTIFIC OR MEDICAL EVIDENCE TO SUPPORT THE USE OF CONVERSION THERAPIES. In Stephen Fry’s documentary, Out There, “reparative therapy” founder Dr Joseph Nicolosi claimed he could convert the sexuality of his (predominantly teenage) patients by resolving “trauma-based conflicts”. However, Nicolosi was unable to find a single ex-gay he had “treated” for Fry to interview. Nevertheless, the lack of evidence appears to have had little effect on those calling for more debate on these therapies. 36
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PSYCHOLOGICAL ‘CURES’ In the 1950s, New South Wales led the charge to curb and control homosexuality. NSW Police Commissioner, Colin Delaney, claimed in 1958 that homosexuality was “Australia’s greatest menace”. Lisa Featherstone and Andy Kaladelfos have shown that homosexuals convicted for consenting sexual acts with other adult men were segregated and medicalised within the prison system. Sydney-based Dr Neil McConaghy (who regularly published his findings in outlets such as the British Journal of Psychiatry) employed conversion therapy during the 1960s and 1970s with what Michael Kirby has described as “the most energetic attempts”. Leading LGBTIQ figures such as Sue Wills and John Ware protested against the danger of this therapy, citing it as a key motivation for their activism. McConaghy’s practices included apomorphine therapy. This involved the injection of up to 6 mg of the morphine derivative to induce severe nausea when patients were shown photographs of men. He also required patients to read pleasurable words on homosexuality aloud, after which he applied electroshocks.
ACT GOVERNMENT LOOKS TO BAN ‘GAY CONVERSION THERAPY’ IN CANBERRA ACT Health Minister Meegan Fitzharris has vowed to ban gay conversion therapy, and sources say the directorate staff have been instructed to move fast so that a ban can be implemented as soon as possible. It comes after Fairfax Media revealed that ‘gay conversion therapy’ remains prevalent in Australia, hidden in clinical settings, faith-based counselling, and online courses. Ms Fitzharris said, “The ACT Government will ban gay conversion therapy. It is abhorrent and completely inconsistent with the inclusive values of Canberrans.”
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STATISTICS FROM THE US SHOW PEOPLE WHO HAVE GONE THROUGH ‘GAY CONVERSION THERAPY’ FACE NINE TIMES THE RATES OF SUICIDE IDEATION AND SUFFER FROM DEPRESSION AT SIX TIMES THE RATE OF THEIR PEERS. THEY ARE THREE TIMES MORE LIKELY TO USE ILLEGAL DRUGS AND BE AT HIGH RISK FOR SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED INFECTIONS.
By Marguerite Johnson & James Bennett Marguerite Johnson is Professor of Classics at the University of Newcastle; James Bennett is a Senior Lecturer in History in the School of Humanities and Social Science at the University of Newcastle.
While some psychiatrists saw homosexuality as a “disease” of the mind; some religious groups see it a “sickness” of the soul. To cure the soul, and to protect the soul of others from contamination, religious conversion therapy can involve ostracising the person from family and community, extensive prayer by, and for the individual, intensive “conferences” designed to “heal”. It can even include exorcism. Religious organisations have also promoted “reparative therapy”, drawing on psychology. While Australia is arguably far less evangelical in its religious convictions and practice than the US, organisations such as the now-defunct Exodus International have been active here.
THE IDEA THAT TO BE LESBIAN IS TO BE SICK AND IN NEED OF A CURE MIGHT SEEM ARCHAIC AND BIZARRE, BUT IN SOME FUNDAMENTALIST CHRISTIAN GROUPS THE IDEA LIVES ON. Historian Graham Willett has studied the so-called “diagnoses” of LGBTIQ “conditions” in 1970s Australia and the eventual removal of homosexuality as a pathology from the third edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders in 1987. According to Willett, the hostility of the medical profession towards homosexuality was taken as a given, and the profession was seen as one of the main enemies of gay people, and of sexual freedom more generally. Psychiatrists and psychologists spoke casually of “curing” homosexuals and were capable of recycling the most offensive and stereotypical representations of gay people without batting an eyelid.
THE “TREATMENTS” (OR TORTURES) DID NOT WORK, OF COURSE, BECAUSE THERE WAS NO SCIENTIFIC OR MEDICAL CREDENCE TO THEM. IN EFFECT, THEY AMOUNTED TO QUACKERY. ‘DISEASE’ OF THE MIND OR SOUL? The human rights violation of such acts, performed under the guise of psychiatry, were more aligned to practices such as exorcisms and other extreme religious and spiritual traditions than to medicine. In fact, Christian conversion therapy has had a much wider and popular presence in the tradition of conversion therapy than its psychiatric equivalent.
Survivors of gay conversion overseas, meanwhile, are winning legal battles and there is an increasing number of lawsuits. In 2017, in Henan province in China, for example, a man was awarded damages and an apology in a lawsuit he filed against a psychiatric hospital over enforced conversion therapy. Organisations are also being closed, such as US-based Jews Offering New Alternatives for Healing, formerly Jews Offering New Alternatives to Homosexuality (JONAH). The opposition to conversion therapy will continue. While the legalisation of same-sex marriage does not legally prevent such damaging discrimination, it is a significant step in the right direction towards stopping it in Australia.
IN THE WAKE OF ALL THIS CONTROVERSY, VICTORIA’S HEALTH WATCHDOG HAS ANNOUNCED THAT ‘GAY CONVERSION THERAPY’ WILL BE INVESTIGATED, CALLING IT “INSIDIOUS”. Religious organisations and other institutions forcing kids into gay conversion therapy have been put on notice by the Victorian Government, which has armed the state’s health watchdog with sweeping new powers to investigate and prosecute rogue providers. The state’s Health Complaints Commissioner has launched an inquiry into the fringe practice, which the Government has called “insidious”. ”People have a right to their sexual identity and we are making sure that this process of gay conversion, wherever it is conducted, needs to come to an end,” Victorian Mental Health Minister Martin Foley said. The commissioner now has the power to financially cripple and criminally prosecute organisations and individuals engaging in the so-called “pray away the gay” practices in Victoria.
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Contentious Character is a contemporary vineyard estate with winery, cellar door, and kitchen, serving a shared, wine paired menu. We create magical weddings and events with character, for our brothers and sisters.
contentiouscharacter.com.au Contentious Character
Vineyard. Winery. Cellar-Door. Kitchen
810 Norton Road, Wamboin NSW 2620 02 6238 3830 info@contentiouscharacter.com.au
At Relationships Australia we strive to support the mental health and wellbeing of people of diverse bodies, genders and sexualities, as well as those questioning their gender identity or sexual orientation. Our services can help you with: • Relationship difficulties • Communication issues • Parenting • Family violence • Trust issues • Sexual difficulties • Grief and loss • Managing conflict • Gambling issues
We can also support anyone experiencing emotional distress around the debate surrounding marriage equality.
To find our more about our services call 1300 364 277 or visit www.racr.relationships.org.au
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Chris & Ivan OUR MARRIAGE OUR LOVE
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We had not taken advantage of the various civil partnership options available to us locally, despite providing some legal recognition. Those terms didn’t resonate positively within me. They reminded me that we weren’t equal, that we were lesser. That we had to take crumbs, rather than be entitled to the cake. They motivated me to work to change the laws, rather than use the existing ones. In 2013 the ACT decided to do what it could, within what it thought it’s capacity was, to provide what no other jurisdiction had. It wasn’t federal equality but, for my Nan, who had presided over an informal commitment ceremony years beforehand, it was marriage, finally. My Nan didn’t live long enough to see marriage equality achieved in Australia, but she was able to see her grandson marry the love of his life, surrounded by family and friends and, for a matter of days and as far as she knew, we were married.
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Nathaniel & Matthew OUR MARRIAGE OUR LOVE
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Getting married for us wasn’t about the word, and it wasn’t about how other people defined us as a couple; for us, there was one simple truth that started us on this journey — we wanted children. Until the recent same-sex marriage vote that spurned the nation and divided families, heterosexual marriage provided greater ‘next of kin’ protections than civil unions or civil partnerships, especially in the cases of children. At the time Australia still did not validate our relationship, nor would it identify us both with equal rights over our future children, we endeavoured to marry using the greatest loophole in this country’s legal system — Dual Citizenship. Matt and I are both dual citizens of UK descent, as such we navigated the legalities of getting married under British Law, rather than Australian Law — at that time Great Britain had legalised same-sex marriage for all UK citizens, including citizens in other countries. As part of the Commonwealth, Australia was forced to provide the same-sex UK and Dual Citizens with recognised marriages in High Commissions around Australia, despite having not legalised same-sex marriage for its own people. We are proud to be Australian and proud to be married!
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Jo & Erin OUR MARRIAGE OUR LOVE
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My amazing wife Jo and I were married on the 4th of January this year in Cape Canaveral, Florida. We had the most extraordinarily beautiful day which we shared with some of our most favourite people. Our ceremony was written entirely by us and reflected our unique personalities and kookiness. We feasted on Mexican and drunk jugs of margaritas and Sangria, sang and danced. It was so empowering to know that when we returned to Australia, our marriage was recognised by law. Our marriage and love being equally valued and it’s significance recognised under Australian law is the most amazing feeling. Love is love.
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SEXUAL HEALTH AND FAMILY PLANNING ACT
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Based at Sexual Health & Family Planning ACT the Canberra Menopause Centre is a specialist service for women seeking information, support and/or medical management of menopause symptoms.
Appointments call 02 6247 3077 FUSEMAGAZINE.COM.AU
Alice & Amanda OUR MARRIAGE OUR LOVE
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We got married by the sea on a Saturday and we could not have asked for a more perfect day. We were so glad we could legally get married. We were surrounded by our family and friends who made our day even more special.
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Imagine a world without factory farming... Few people realise that factory farming is the single greatest cause of animal cruelty on the planet today. Most pork, bacon, ham, chicken and egg products come from animals who live lives of abject misery in factory farms. These are highly intelligent animals who are forced to endure intense confinement and surgical procedures without pain relief. They have been denied the same protection from acts of cruelty that are
afforded to dogs and cats, despite having the same capacity to suffer. But it doesn’t have to be this way. Our choices can set them free. By refusing factory-farmed, consuming fewer animal products, or going meat-free, you can create a kinder world for animals. Visit MakeitPossible.com and join thousands of other caring Australians who are making a world without factory farming, possible.
Watch the film. Sign the pledge. Inspire others.
Animals Australia, 37 O'Connell St, North Melbourne, Victoria 3051
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BIG GAY BREAKFAST {TILLEY’S DEVINE CAFE}
You’re invited to mobilise in support of the most significant advance against HIV since the introduction of HIV treatments nearly 20 years ago.
WE CAN END HIV BY 2020 2020 marks the end of the decade and it can also mark the end for new cases of HIV in Australia. Visit the website >
OUT&ABOUT
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AIDS GARDEN OF REFLECTION THE AIDS GARDEN OF REFLECTION IS A LIVING TRIBUTE TO THOSE LOST TO AIDS AND IN SUPPORT OF THOSE LIVING WITH HIV. Designed as a place of contemplation, the garden provides an opportunity for families, friends and supporters to honour those lost to HIV and AIDS, heal, reflect and develop hope. The garden provides a sense of calm and comfort, a special haven featuring a curving arbour with red flowering climbers and a shallow rock pond. A series of benches and rock seating arranged throughout the garden enable visitors to reflect individually, or in small gatherings. Major sponsors include: • ActewAGL • AIDS Action Council Patron John Mackay • AIDS Trust of Australia • ACT Government • John James Foundation • King O’Malley’s • National Arboretum • The Snow Foundation VISIT THE AIDS GARDEN OF RELECTION AT THE NATIONAL ARBORETUM CANBERRA Forest Drive, Canberra ACT 2601 Open 7 days 6.00am - 8.30pm
aidsgardenact.com.au AIDS ACTION COUNCIL OF THE ACT Havelock House, 85 Northbourne Avenue (Gould Street entrance) Turner ACT 2612 PO Box 5245 Braddon ACT 2612 46
02 6257 2855 contact@aidsaction.org.au
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YOUR HOROSCOPE JUNE & JULY 2018 June and July may encourage you to take that mid-year holiday. When Mars is in retrograde the desire to rest and chill out is vastly increased, making it easier to leave work and your worries behind. Some people may experience slowdowns in their work, finances and romance. It’s all part of the natural change in the seasons, so going with the flow is most important.
Aquarius
January 21 – February 18 When it comes to romance and sex, you know what you want, and you know who you want it from! There is going to be some significant electricity happening between you and someone special over the next couple of months. Tip: Be the best version of you and love will bloom.
Taurus
April 21 – May 21 A trip may be on the cards over the next few months. If you’re unsure about taking some time for yourself... remember life is not just about money, work and study. Tip: Taurus, if you’re feeling burnt out, slow down and chill out. Now is a great time to take a holiday and get away.
Leo
July 23 – August 23 The last half of 2018 is an exceptional time to develop new life skills. Consider learning a new language, how to water ski or even something arty. Anything you want really. Tip: Don’t let life hold you back from doing the things that make your life better and more fulfilling.
Scorpio
October 24 – November 22 If you’re not already working on your fitness, then you really need to get out there and do something sporty! If you are, then crank it up! Tip: If someone is bothering you, don’t repress your reactions. Be open with your emotions, register your upset and go work out.
Pisces
February 19 – March 20 The next couple of months will be all about love and creativity. You might find yourself super busy living a fabulously full life over June and July. Tip: Make time to get into a regular workout and eat healthy, nourishing food, as you are going to need the extra energy boost.
Gemini
May 22 – June 21 Are you stuck in a rut Gemini? Is life fun enough? Is it time for you to try something new and more adventurous. Tip: Turn that impulse into a plan of action — do it and take more initiative. Life will be better and more fun if you take charge of your destiny!
Virgo
August 24 – September 23
Aries
March 21 – April 20 You might find yourself faced with a difficult decision and don’t know what to do. It will be important not to force it. Just relax, let go, and the answer will come. Tip: Remember, you can’t save everybody and fix everything all the time. Sometimes what is, just is.
Cancer
June 22 – July 22 Do your best to connect with somebody special or that you like romantically. Go out for a romantic dinner or a picnic by the lake where you can truly show off your beautiful self. Tip: The more fit and flexible you are, the more romance and sex you will manifest in your life.
Libra
September 24 – October 23
Your natural instinct is usually to give, give, give, then give some more. You may find over the next couple of months that it’s better to receive than to give. Tip: Remember, nothing is set in stone (even though you might like it to be). Often change is just what your life needs.
There may be some disruption to your routine, but it’s not the end of the world. Libra, make the most of the opportunity, and you’ll be rewarded by all kinds of fabulousness that is coming your way. Tip: Get thinking about what else you could do to be more healthy and happy.
Sagittarius
Capricorn
If you find yourself feeling exhausted, stop pushing on and give yourself permission to coast a little. Life is never static — it ebbs and flows, and that’s ok. Tip: Do something that energises you, and something entirely unexpected may just enter into the equation.
You may find that you need to work on your communication skills, particularly when it comes to emotional issues. Tip: If a disagreement appears between people you care about, step back and keep as detached a perspective as you possibly can. It’s only then you can help.
November 23 – December 22
December 23 – January 20
STARGAZER
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EMAIL DEAR ROSE WITH YOUR PROBLEM
By Rose Pappalardo
Dear Rose, All my gay friends are talking about marriage and kids. I can’t think of anything worse, is there something wrong with me? Sunny-Lee
Dear Sunny-Lee, There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. Marriage and kids just don’t float your boat — that’s ok. With the recent passing of same-sex marriage, it’s hardly surprising that everyone is talking about it or doing it. A friend of mine recently commented that he also couldn’t think of anything worse than succumbing to a “domesticated lifestyle” by marrying, but he entirely supports marriage equality for those who do want to tie the knot. Marriage and children are not for everyone and it’s good you have recognised that those things are not for you. I think the most significant thing to remember is that it’s important to be curious and respectful when it comes to other people’s choices and how they decide to live there lives. Diversity rules!
Dear Rose, My GF is a serious gamer. I didn’t mind so much at first, but she never wants to go out — and if she does, she spends most of her time playing wherever we are. How can I make her look up and see what she’s missing every day. Kim
Dear Rose, I’m 23, and I’m in a serious relationship with a guy in his mid 50s. I want to introduce him to my parents, but I’m pretty sure they will totally flip out. What should I do? Sam
Dear Sam, Although it’s totally fine to date an older person, you are right Sam, your parents will probably flip out. Before you judge them, ask yourself: what would you think if your child was seeing someone who is about 30 years older? Reversing the scenario to their point of view will help you empathise and also formulate your dialogue in answering any questions they may have. The other issue that comes to mind is whether you have discussed this with your BF? Introducing your man to your parents has consequences for him as well. You will need to present as a united front to protect each other and the relationship that you have developed together. Ultimately it’s your life. While we all strive for our parent’s approval, the fact is the best we can hope for is their love and respect, regardless of their opinions.
Dear Kim, From the little experience I’ve had with the gaming community, gamers take what they do seriously, and they can at times get totally and completely immersed. While it’s ok to be passionate about something you love, there needs to be a balance between the gaming world and the real world. It is unavoidable, but you will need to discuss boundaries surrounding her gaming and having a meaningful relationship. Whenever difficult discussions need to happen, preparation is the key. Determine what you think may be a reasonable amount of time that accommodates her love of gaming, where it happens and doesn’t, and includes quality time with you. I suggest starting small by setting aside one night a week that you both decide is “date night”, where there is no gaming done or mentioned. This can open the path for her to begin to see that there is another world, and that she can balance the passion that she has for gaming and the love that she has for you.
“I think the best day will be when we no longer talk about being gay or straight. It’s not a gay wedding, it’s just a wedding. It’s not a gay marriage, it’s just a marriage.” Pink
Need help or someone to talk to? Support is available for anyone in distress by phoning (24 Hours) QLife 1800 184 527, Lifeline on 13 11 14 or AAC counselling services on 02 6257 2855. If you require relationship support or services call Relationships Australia on 1300 364 277
ASK DEAR ROSE 48
DEARROSE
If you need help or have a question email : dearrose@fusemagazine.com.au
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DON’T TURN YOUR BACK ON YOUR SEXUAL HEALTH
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LESBIAN BISEXUAL TRANS QUEER STRAIGHT OR EVEN SOMEWHERE IN BETWEEN?
SEXUAL HEALTH AND FAMILY PLANNING ACT
Visit our website at shfpact.org.au where you’ll find heaps of information — or make an appointment at the SHFPACT clinic by calling 02 6247 3077. • • • • • •
Cervical Screening and HPV Vaccine STI and HIV screening, checks and advice Reproductive and sexual health services Sexual difficulties and contraception services Canberra Menopause Centre Services for people with disabilities
FEMALE DOCTORS AND NURSES ARE AVAILABLE
The SHFPACT clinic is located at Level 1, 28 University Ave, Canberra City. We offer a holistic, confidential and respectful service. Call 02 6247 3077 or email shfpact@shfpact.org.au to make an appointment. More at shfpact.org.au
Wake Up Wonderful
