The Best Damn Newsletter in New Jersey!
CHALLENGE
The Newsletter of the Gay Activist Alliance in Morris County Serving New Jersey’s GLBTI Communities Since 1972 Volume 42, Issue 6, Summer 2016
Gleanings Queer News from across the nation and around the world 49 people were killed and 53 others were wounded when Law enforcement officials said Mateen swore ala gunman opened fire and took hostages at a gay night- legiance to the leader of ISIS in a 911 phone call shortly club in Orlando, Florida, early on the morning of Sunday, before the shooting, in which he also mentioned the BosJune 12th. The shooter, identified by several law en- ton Marathon bombers, Dzhokhar Tsarnaev and Tamerlan forcement sources as Omar Mateen, 29, was killed in a Tsarnaev. shootout with law enforcement after a three-hour siege. Mateen legally bought the two guns used in the The massacre — the worst mass shooting in the history of shooting in the past week, said Trevor Velinor, an assisthe United States — began when the gunman stormed the tant special agent in charge of the U.S. Bureau of Alcohol, Pulse nightclub about 2 a.m. ET with a handgun and a Sig Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives in Tampa. Police said Sauer MCX, an AR-15-style rifle. that Mateen was a U.S. citizen but some of his family The carnage ended about 5 a.m. ET, when 11 Or- members aren't. lando police officers and three Orange County sheriff's Many Muslim groups swiftly rebuked the attack deputies stormed the nightclub and exchanged fire with Sunday. "We condemn this monstrous attack and offer our Mateen. City officials said about 300 people were in the heartfelt condolences to the families and loved ones of club at the time of the shooting. all those killed or injured," Rasha Mubarak, Orlando reLaw enforcement sources said that Omar Mateen gional coordinator for the Council on American-Islamic was born in New York in 1986 to Afghani parents who em- Relations, said in a statement. "The Muslim community igrated to the United States around 1980, and was listed joins our fellow Americans in repudiating anyone or any as living in Fort Pierce, about 125 miles south of Orlando group that would claim to justify or excuse such an appalon Florida's Atlantic coast. Mateen had active security ling act of violence." officer and firearm licenses, according to Florida records, President Barack Obama said Sunday afternoon and his family said he worked in security. that the massacre is "a further reminder of how easy it is The FBI first looked into Mateen in 2013 because for someone to get their hands on a weapon that lets of a statement he had made about radical Islamic propa- them shoot people in a school or in a house of worship or ganda, law enforcement officials told NBC News. Ron a movie theater or in a nightclub." Hopper, an assistant FBI special agent in charge of OrlanThe American Medical Association (AMA), the do operations, said the investigation began after Mateen largest medical organization in the United States, passed made offensive comments to a historic resolution June co-workers. He was inter14th in response to the Inside Challenge viewed twice, but the invesweekend’s mass shooting. Challenge Information .......................... page 2 tigation was closed after the After years of tiptoeing GAAMC Events for July/August ........... page 2 FBI wasn't able to confirm around the topic of gun that he had ties to radical control, AMA leaders votPresident’s Letter ................................... page 3 Islam, Hopper said. The FBI ed to officially call gun July/August Q-munity Calendar............ page 5 interviewed him again in 2014 violence a public health Sangre Fria by Tony Puma ................... page 8 when it learned that he might issue and respond accordBuddies Corner....................................... page 9 have a connection to a U.S. ingly. That means flexing GAAMC Board Minutes ...................... page 10 suicide bomber, but the inthe organization’s powervestigation was closed beful political muscle on Bulletin Board ...................................... page 10 cause the FBI determined Capitol Hill to refocus So Long, Farewell…? .......................... page 10 that "contact was minimal federal funds toward GAAMC Information ........................... page 11 and did not constitute a substudying gun violence. stantive relationship," Hopper (continued on page 4) said.
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Volume 42, Number 6 Summer 2016 ISSN 0277-1675 Editor: Allen Neuner Assistant Editor Bill Stella Submissions The deadline for all articles, inserts, and advertisements is the 15th of the previous month. The staff requests that all submissions be provided as electronic files. E-mail all submissions to challenge@gaamc.org. Ad Rates Single issue: Full page, $125.00; Half page, $85.00; Quarter page, $45.00; Business card, $25.00. For multi-issue rates, contact the Editor. GAAMC members may place one free classified ad per month, of no more than 200 characters in length. Challenge is © 2016 by the Gay Activist Alliance in Morris County, a 501(c)3 tax-exempt not-for-profit corporation. All rights reserved. All articles reflect the views of the original contributors and do not necessarily reflect the opinions or policies of GAAMC, its officers, or executive board. All copyrights revert to the original contributors upon publication. No portion of this publication may be reproduced without the express written permission of the contributor. All articles, contributions, and advertisements are printed at the discretion of the Editor and/or GAAMC Executive Board.
Summer 2016
GAAMC Events for Summer 2016 Main meetings start at 8:15 unless otherwise stated. Discussion groups and Film Festival movies start at 7:00. July 4: ICE CREAM SOCIAL – Join us for a GAAMC tradition of cool summer fun in the Terrace Room with the flavors of summer – ice cream of all descriptions, sherbet and toppings galore with dear friends in a superb community atmosphere. We’ll save a seat for you! Open Talk Discussion Group Tonight’s moderator: Gordon July 11: Privilege Walk – We like to think of ourselves as being all self-made, but how much of what we’ve achieved has been set for us by nothing we’ve had any hand in? Come take the Privilege Walk, and learn how circumstances of your birth, and a host of events over which you had no control materially affect your life! Open Talk Discussion Group Tonight’s moderators: Gordon & Sherri July 18: Let’s Talk About Sex! Romance, love, and the “dirty deed” are all the topic of conversation in our rarely experienced Women’s Only and Men’s Only spaces, where we can be as specific or as demure as we’d like to be. Poetry, blood, life, and love are all fair game when all the sexes are fair and brilliant! July 25: Summer Games Night – Ladderball, bean bag toss, pineapple bowling – what do these all have in common? GAAMC is playing outdoors! Our play time happens during the twilight. Open Talk happens at 8 pm. Catch some fireflies and enjoy a walk in the Labyrinth, badminton, and other outdoor fun with your GAAMC friends! Open Talk Discussioni Group Tonight’s moderator: Liz 20-Somethings Group meets tonight. Moderator: Nick. Topic: 20-Somethings Do Game Night. The 20-Somethings relax and play some of their favorite games, including Cards Against Humanity, Heads Up, Clue, and more! August 1: Summer Love – Summer Songs – Bring your favorite songs of the summer on your phone or iPod or other device and share your memory and your music with your GAAMC friends. Open Talk Discussion Group Tonight’s moderator: Kerry August 8: Sports Fans! Why do you love what you love and play what you play? There are a million reasons why we become fans of different types of sports – did you play in school? Was there a crush you had so you joined the team? Share your love with our GAAMC family before our Mets outing the following Saturday! Open Talk Discussion Group Tonight’s moderator: Liz August 15: Nick en Español – join our own 20-somethings facilitator Nick who will lead us through some basic Spanish. As cosmopolitans, language and culture polish us, bringing our inner diamond brilliance to the fore. Open Talk Discussion Group Tonight’s moderator: Liz August 22: Summer Singalong – West Side Story Sing along with Natalie Wood’s Maria and Richard Beymer’s Tony in a ground-breaking film that tells a story hundreds of years old in a timeless style. Tune your voice and prepare to be all that you can be and love with all of your self. August 29: Favorite trips – EVER! Each of us gets 2 minutes to talk about our favorite trips – summer or winter, autumn or spring! There may even be time for a second round. This fun and exciting event is perfect for the late summer! OpenTalk Discussion Group Tonight’s moderator: Gordon. (continued on next page)
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President’s Letter We’re Here, We’re Queer, Get Over It by Mickey Suiter This isn’t the column I started to write this month. I was going to write about the joy of getting married. But then Orlando happened and joy isn’t what I’m feeling now. For several days now I’ve been alternating between sadness and anger. Neither emotion seems to be fading. I’m sad for the victims, who left this life all too soon. I’m sad for their friends and family for their huge loss. And I’m sad for our community that, after all of these years and all of our successes, we still have to fear for our lives. And that’s where the anger comes in. We have achieved so much. We can serve in the military. We can marry. Here in New Jersey we’ve amended our Law Against Discrimination to include sexual orientation and gender identity. It is possible to live openly free of fear of harassment. Or at least we thought so. But over half of the members of Congress view us as “less than.:” They refuse to even consider granting us equal protection under the law. Some don’t feel we need it. Many don’t feel we deserve it. They want to use their religion as an excuse to foist their bigotry on us. We may never know exactly what was in the mind of the shooter in Orlando. We know he identified in some mixed up way with terrorists who are against America so this was an act of terrorism. But we also know this was a hate crime aimed at the LGBT community. A lot of the media and politicians seem to be in denial on this. But the shooter knew Pulse was a gay bar and he knew who the customers were and he deliberately chose Pulse as his target. So how was this not an attack on our community? Some say he was gay himself. Whether or not that is true, we all know that internalized homophobia is no less hateful. Like most Americans, he grew up in a society, in a religion, in a culture that looks down on the LGBT community, that treats us as less than, that says we are not only not equal but evil, perverted and immoral. He was taught to hate by our society, by our leaders. This has got to stop. Our successes have made us complacent. We often laugh at the outrageous things our opponents say about us, treating them as a joke rather than the dangerous influence that they are. We have to stand up to bigotry whenever and wherever it rears its ugly head. We have to stand up for ourselves. We must demand equality, nothing less. We do not want to be tolerated or accepted. We want to be respected. We demand to be respected. We are human beings and have the right to live freely without fear.
Our community is one of love but that does not mean we won’t fight when we are attacked. Over forty years ago one of the chants we used in our Pride marches was, “We’re here, we’re queer, get used to it.” People may have gotten used to it over the decades, but we want more than that. It’s time they got over it. Mickey Suiter is one of the four founding members of GAAMC and currently serves as President. He lives in Boonton with his newly-married husband, John DeLeeuw.
GAAMC Events for Summer 2016 (continued from previous page) 20-Somethings Group meets tonight. Moderator: Nick. Topic: If You Seek Amy: The 20-Somethings Get Down and Dirty Discussing Sex, Crushes, Fetishes, and More! The 20somethings discuss that topic that we all secretly crave to discuss. We will talk about safe sex practices, fetishes, our biggest crushes, and other topics along those lines. Hope to see you there!
Outings Summer’s almost halfway gone, and if you haven’t been down the shore yet, here’s your chance to enjoy a fun day with your GAAMC friends! GAAMC is organizing a day at the beach on Sunday, July 24th, on the warm, sunny beaches of Asbury Park! Want to brave the waves of the Atlantic Ocean? Perfect that tan you’ve been working on? Show off that beach body you’ve been preparing all spring? Walk (or bike) the refurbished Boardwalk with its many attractions, intriguing shops, and tempting eateries? It’s all here waiting for you! Plans for the day are still in flux, so contact Jay at Outings@GAAMC.org for the latest word on our road trip to surf, sand, and fun! The NY Mets are organizing their first-ever LGBT Pride Night at Citi Field, and they have invited GAAMC's members to join them and help strike out bullying! On Saturday, August 13th at 7:10 pm watch the 2015 National League Champions take on the San Diego Padres, followed by a free postgame concert! GAAMC will be hanging out in the "Coca-Cola Corner" above the Clubhouse. Tickets cost $52 each, with a portion of each ticket sold through this special offer benefiting the LGBT Network, a 501(c)(3) non-profit organization, and its Safe Schools Initiative to stop bullying in Long Island and Queens. For more information, contact Jay at Outings@GAAMC.org! For those of you looking ahead to those closing days of summer in September, GAAMC will be taking part in Morristown Community Health Day from 9:00 am to 1:00 pm on Saturday, September 10th. More information will appear in the next issue of Challenge!
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Gleanings (continued from page 1) To see this through, however, Congress would need to lift a 20-year-old ban, the Dickey Amendment, that blocks the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) from funding any research related to gun violence. But the AMA, with one of the largest political lobbying budgets of any organization in the U.S., appears ready to fight. “Even as America faces a crisis unrivaled in any other developed country, the Congress prohibits the CDC from conducting the very research that would help us understand the problems associated with gun violence and determine how to reduce the high rate of firearm-related deaths and injuries,” said AMA President Dr. Steven Stack, in a written statement. “An epidemiological analysis of gun violence is vital so physicians and other health providers, law enforcement and society at large may be able to prevent injury, death and other harms to society resulting from firearms,” he added. The Dickey Amendment was heavily lobbied for by the National Rifle Association (NRA), who saw any negative research on guns as an attack on their industry. Physicians, scientists, politicians, and family members of gun violence victims have demanded the ban’s repeal for years. President Obama tried to lift the gun research restrictions in 2012, but ultimately couldn’t stop Congress from continuing to block funding requests. The AMA has been relatively passive in their support of gun safety over recent years. But the recent mass shooting in Orlando appeared to push its leaders to a tipping point. "It's about time we took some action to implement our policy and try to make a difference," said Dr. Robert Gilchick, a member of the AMA's Council on Science and Public Health. "How many more mass shootings do we have to sit through — not one more I hope." The Human Rights Campaign (HRC), the nation’s largest LGBT advocacy group, veered from its normal set of priorities and on June 17th announced that it would begin pushing for tighter controls on guns. The shift, adopted late on June 16th by the HRC’s board of directors, comes in the wake of the largest mass shooting in the nation’s history. “Forty-nine members of our community were murdered on Sunday morning because of a toxic combination of two things: a deranged, unstable individual who had been conditioned to hate LGBTQ people, and easy access to military-style guns,” HRC President Chad Griffin said. “It is imperative that we address both issues in order to mitigate safety risk to our community.” HRC’s announcement links two of the three Gs of politics – God, guns, and gays -- in a way that has never before been tested. HRC has for decades lobbied for issues as varied as workplace equality and housing laws. But in recent years, it has grown more ambitious with its goals. Especially after the Supreme Court declared last year that all Americans have a right to marry, public opinion has been shifting, and HRC has been eager to use that tide for its gains and against the backlash. HRC’s pivot to
guns will test the idea, put out by some, that they “are more powerful than the National Rifle Association”. “As a society, we must hold accountable lawmakers, religious leaders and other public officials who put a target on the backs of LGBTQ people through hateful rhetoric and legislation, because they are complicit in the violence fueled by their words and actions,” Griffin said. “The safety of the LGBTQ community depends on our ability to end both the hatred toward our community and the epidemic of gun violence that has spiraled out of control.” (NBC News; Time; ThinkProgress.org) Mississippi residents and businesses now have a federal judge’s okay to begin denying wedding services to samesex couples based on their religious objections, beginning July 1. One more federal hearing is all that stands in the way of the law taking effect next month. U.S. District Judge Carlton Reeves issued a fourpage order, rejecting a motion for a preliminary injunction to stop the law from going into effect. Reeves wrote that would be inappropriate, since none of the lawsuit’s plaintiffs would be harmed by the law in the immediate future, Republican Governor Phil Bryant signed the socalled religious freedom law, House Bill 1523, in April. Supporters of the measure declared businesses and individuals who want to exercise their religious views needed such a law in the wake of the Supreme Court’s decision in Obergefell v. Hodges. “HB 1523 does not bar plaintiffs from getting married, exercising any right associated with marriage, or holding or living by whatever moral or religious beliefs they see fit,” the state attorneys wrote in their response to the ACLU’s lawsuit. “By its terms, HB 1523 is an accommodation law intended to convey the strongest protection for the ‘free exercise of religious beliefs and moral convictions’ permitted by the state and federal constitutions.” The law would provide protection for people with three religious beliefs: that marriage is only between a man and a woman; that sexual relations should only take place inside such a marriage; and that a person’s “immutable biological sex” is determined by anatomy and genetics at birth. Those notions will now carry the force of law, allowing county clerks to cite religious objections to recuse themselves from issuing marriage licenses to samesex couples. Although HB 1523 specifies that a clerk must make other arrangements for such a license to be issued, lawmakers never addressed what would happen if every employee in a clerk’s office in a particular county declined to issue licenses. In addition to marriage licenses, the law is anticipated to directly impact same-sex adoptions, employee business practices such as dress codes, and school bathroom policies. (LGBTQNation.com) (continued on page 10)
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Summer 2016 Q-munity Calendar Recurring Contact Information *Hackensack Peer Support Groups: 800-508-7577; njbuddies@aol.com †Pride Center, Highland Park: 732-846-2232; www.pridecenter.org ‡Hudson Pride Connections Center: 201-963-4779; HudsonPride.org #QSpot LGBT Community Center: 732-455-3373; info@jsqspot.org λNewark LGBTQ Center: 973-424-9555; info@NewarkLGBTQCenter.org Monday – Friday 8:00 am to 4:00 pm - HIV testing, Morristown; 973-889-6802 9:00 am to 1:00 pm - HIV testing, Asbury Park; 800-947-0020 10:00 am to 5:00 pm - HiTOPS Health Center, Princeton; www.hitops.org; 609-683-5155 x 211 Noon - Library Lounge, Ocean Grove# 3:00 pm to 8:00 pm – Internet Café, Newark λ Syringe exchange program, Newark; variable hours; njcri.org; 973-558-5054 Adult drop-in center, Newark; variable hours;njcri.org Tuesday - Saturday Project WOW! youth center, Newark; variable hours; njcri.org; 973-412-7080 Every Sunday 10:45 am - MCC of Christ the Liberator, Highland Park; tombohache10@gmail.com Noon - St. Francis of Assisi Church, Glen Ridge; 973-731-7765; stfrancisnj.org 12:30 pm – SOS meeting, Ocean Grove# 1:30 pm – Library Lounge, Ocean Grove# 2:30 pm - Liberation in Truth Unity Fellowship Church, Newark; 973-621-2100 5:30 pm - Central Jersey Rainbows Bowling League, Bradley Beach; CJRBowling@gmail.com Every Monday 10:30 am - The Wellness Community, Newark; 973-565-0300; info@hyacinth.org Noon – QSpot Job Resource Center, Ocean Grove# 7:00 pm - GAAMC, Morris Township (see page 2) 7:00 pm - Bowling, Union; merenl@comcast.net 6:30 pm – Yoga, Newarkλ 7:00 pm - S.E.L.F. HIV Men’s support group, Hackensack * 7:30 pm - New Jersey Gay Men’s Chorus choir practice, Princeton; 609-396-7774; www.njgmc.org 8:00 pm - Bowling, Green Brook; qcrollers@aol.com Every Tuesday Noon – QSpot Job Resource Center, Ocean Grove# 12:30 pm - The Wellness Community, Newark; 973-565-0300; @hyacinth.org
4:00 pm - Treatment Adherence Support Group, Jersey City; 201-432-1134; info@hyacinth.org 6:00 pm – TransView trans support, Jersey City ‡ 6:00 pm - SAGE, Jersey City ‡ 7:30 pm - Tuesday Night Lesbian Connection, Bound Brook; 908-791-3764 7:30 pm - Men’s HIV support group, Asbury Park; 732-7755084; apstillpoz@yahoo.com 7:30 pm - Positive Yoga, Oradell * 8:00 pm – Primary Purpose Group, Ocean Grove# 8:45 pm - Bowling, Belleville; 973-256-5936; NJGLB@aol.com 9:00 pm - Bowling, Jersey City; 201-933-6028; JoeyNJ@aol.com 9:15 pm - Bowling, Edison; 732-548-4550;cnjgbl@yahoo.com Every Wednesday 10:30 am - The Wellness Community, Jersey City; 201-4321134; info@hyacinth.org 2:30 pm - RU Pride, Newark; 973-353-5716 6:30 pm – Overeaters Anonymous, Ocean Grove# 6:30 pm – Craft/Crochet/Knitting Circle, Newarkλ 7:30 pm - Men’s Living Out group, Highland Park† 7:30 pm - Gay Men’s Coming Out group, Highland Park; njwarrior@aol.com† Every Thursday 11:00 am – Meal distribution, Newarkλ 6:00 pm - Our Youth weekly support group, Jersey City; www.myspacenj.org 6:00 pm – Chill Night, Newarkλ 6:30 pm - Double Jeopardy peer support group, Hackensack* 6:30 pm – Men of Hudson Pride, Jersey City ‡ 7:00 pm - Sexual Assault Survivor Support, Princeton; www.hitops.org 7:00 pm – Visions HIV Support Group, Ocean Grove# 7:30 pm - Rainbows on Cleveland Street, Orange; 973-2565936; rbowsoncleveland@aol.com 7:30 pm - Writers group, Highland Park † Every Friday 6:00 pm - Youth Connect, Jersey City ‡ Every Saturday Noon – Library Lounge, Ocean Grove#
July 2016 01 Fri 7:00 pm – Positive Women peer support group, Hackensack* 8:00 pm - Karaoke, Highland Park;†
5:30 pm – Hudson County HIV/AIDS Services Planning Council, Jersey City ‡ 6:30 pm – Gay Men’s Opera Club; 732-249-9034; hagol@msn.com
02 Sat 1:00 pm – Women of Pride, Jersey City‡ 2:30 pm – First & Third for GLBTI Youth, Princeton; 609-6835155; www.HiTOPS.org
04 Mon 6:30 pm – JSTSURF trans support group, Ocean Grove# 7:00 pm -- Support Group for Lesbians with Cancer, New Brunswick; 732-235-6781; slirzero @umdnj.edu 7:30 pm – Raices Latinas LGBT, Highland Park† 7:30 pm – Anxiety Support Group, Highland Park†
03 Sun 2:00 pm – Central Jersey Rope Share, Highland Park† 4:00 pm – Dignity Metro NJ Mass, Maplewood; 973-8574040; Dignitymetronj@msn.com
05 Tue 5:00 pm – Creative Expressions, Ocean Grove#
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05 Tue 7:00 pm – Meditation AA Meeting, Ocean Grove# 7:30 pm – LGBT Fellowship, Belleville; 973-751-0616 7:30 pm – Come OUT and Play, Highland Park†
5155; www.HiTOPS.org 7:00 pm – Rainbow Bowling, Bradley Beach; 732-774-4540 7:00 pm – NJ Gay Film Society & Potluck Dinner Club, Location TBA; gayfilms@bigfoot.com
06 Wed 6:30 pm - Positive People peer support group, Hackensack * 7:30 pm – Jersey Boys of Leather, Highland Park†
17 Sun 4:00 pm – Dignity Metro NJ Mass, Maplewood; 973-8374040; Dignitymetronj@msn.com 4:00 pm – TrueSelves trans support group, Highland Park†
07 Thu 7:00 pm –Coffee social, Edison; njlgh.onefireplace.com 7:30 pm – NJ Women Coming Out, Highland Park† 08 Fri 7:00 pm – Young Men’s Social Network, Highland Park† 09 Sat 1:00 pm – Youth Drop-In, Highland Park† 7:00 pm – Men’s Movie Night, Highland Park;† 7:30 pm – Dignity New Brunswick gay Catholic liturgy; 732968-9263; dignitynb@earthlink.net 10 Sun 2:00 pm – Male Drawing Session, Highland Park† 6:00 pm – Gay Men’s Classical Song Club, Kingston; pbrown02@worldnet.att.net 11 Mon 7:00 pm – Queer Woman with Kids, Highland Park† 7:30 pm – PFLAG of Morris County, Mendham; 973-5437229; craig.bcc@verizon.net 7:30 pm – PFLAG, Princeton; 609-663-5155; www.pflagprinceton.org 7:30 pm – Hot Topics 4 Lesbians, Ocean Grove# 7:30 pm – TrueSelves trans support group, Highland Park† 12 Tue 7:30 pm – Pride Center Board Meeting, Highland Park† 13 Wed 7:00 pm – QSpot Book Club, Ocean Grove# 7:30 pm – Wednesday Night Women’s Hang Out, Highland Park† 14 Thu 7:00 pm – Under the Rainbow, Highland Park† 7:30 pm -- PFLAG of North Jersey, South Orange; 908-7897489; pflagwaver@aol.com 7:30 pm -- Alternate Thursdays, Montclair; kjdinkin@comcast.net 7:30 pm – Kollege of Kink, Highland Park† 15 Fri 9:00 am – SVPC committee meeting, Highland Park† 7:00 pm – Positive Women peer support group, Hackensack* 7:30 pm – Dignity New Brunswick social; 732-968-9263; dignitynb@earthlink.net 7:30 pm – Movie Night Out, Ocean Grove# 7:45 pm – Out of the Box open mic, Highland Park† 16 Sat 1:00 pm – Women of Pride, Jersey City‡ 2:00 pm – NJ Hypnokink, Highland Park;† 2:30 pm – First & Third for GLBTI Youth, Princeton; 609-683-
18 Mon 7:00 pm -- Support Group for Lesbians with Cancer, New Brunswick; 732-235-6781; slirzero@umdnj.edu 7:00 pm – HIV testing, Highland Park† 7:30 pm – Young Men’s Social Network, Highland Park† 7:30 pm – Raices Latinas LGBT, Highland Park† 7:30 pm – Anxiety Support Group, Highland Park† 19 Tue 5:00 pm – Creative Expressions, Ocean Grove# 7:30 pm – Come OUT and Play, Highland Park† 7:30 pm – LGBTQ for Social Justice, Highland Park† 20 Wed 6:30 pm - Positive People peer support group, Hackensack * 7:00 pm – JCLGO monthly meeting, Jersey City; 201-3335725; www.jclgo.org 7:30 pm – United in Grace discussion/support group, Jersey City; 201-946-0650; greg.perez@comcast.net 7:00 pm – Board meeting, Edison; njlgh.onefireplace.com 21 Thu 7:00 pm – GAAMC board meeting, Morristown; all GAAMC members are invited to attend. 7:30 pm – NJ Women Coming Out, Highland Park† 7:30 pm - PFLAG of Northwest NJ, Sparta; 973-729-9909 22 Fri 7:30 pm – Comedy Night! benefit for Youth Drop In, Highland Park† 23 Sat 1:00 pm – Youth Drop-In, Highland Park† 7:00 pm – Gay Bowling, Asbury Lanes, Asbury Park; 732776-6160 25 Mon 7:30 pm – NJ Rope Bite, Highland Park† 26 Tue 7:00 pm – What Matters Most: Financial Strategy for Our LGBTQ Community, Highland Park† 8:30 pm – Men’s Social Night, Highland Park† 27 Wed 7:30 pm - United in Grace discussion/support group, Jersey City; 201-946-0650; greg.perez@comcast.net 7:30 pm – Wednesday Night Women’s Hang Out, Highland Park† 28 Thu 7:00 pm – Under the Rainbow, Highland Park†
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29 Fri 7:30 pm – Rise Up As One: After Orlando, Highland Park† 30 Sat 1:00 pm – Women of Pride, Jersey City‡ 7:00 pm – New Jersey Furs, Highland Park† 31 Sun Noon – Family Friendly Pool Party, Millstone; njlgh.onefireplace.com August 2016 01 Mon 6:30 pm – JSTSURF trans support group, Ocean Grove# 7:00 pm -- Support Group for Lesbians with Cancer, New Brunswick; 732-235-6781; slirzero @umdnj.edu 7:30 pm – Raices Latinas LGBT, Highland Park† 7:30 pm – TrueSelves trans support group, Highland Park† 7:30 pm – Anxiety Support Group, Highland Park† 02 Tue 5:00 pm – Creative Expressions, Ocean Grove# 7:00 pm – Meditation AA Meeting, Ocean Grove# 7:30 pm – LGBT Fellowship, Belleville; 973-751-0616 7:30 pm – Come OUT and Play, Highland Park† 03 Wed 5:30 pm – Hudson County HIV/AIDS Services Planning Council, Jersey City ‡ 6:30 pm - Positive People peer support group, Hackensack * 7:30 pm – Jersey Boys of Leather, Highland Park† 04 Thu 7:00 pm –Coffee social, Edison; njlgh.onefireplace.com 7:30 pm – NJ Women Coming Out, Highland Park† 05 Fri 7:00 pm – Positive Women peer support group, Hackensack* 8:00 pm - Karaoke, Highland Park;† 06 Sat 2:30 pm – First & Third for GLBTI Youth, Princeton; 609-6835155; www.HiTOPS.org 07 Sun 11:00 am – PCNJ Summer Picnic, Highland Park† 2:00 pm – Central Jersey Rope Share, Highland Park† 4:00 pm – Dignity Metro NJ Mass, Maplewood; 973-8574040; Dignitymetronj@msn.com 6:30 pm – Gay Men’s Opera Club; 732-249-9034; 08 Mon 7:00 pm – Queer Woman with Kids support group, Highland Park† 7:30 pm – PFLAG of Morris County, Mendham; 973-5437229; craig.bcc@verizon.net 7:30 pm – PFLAG, Princeton; 609-663-5155; www.pflagprinceton.org 7:30 pm – Hot Topics 4 Lesbians, Ocean Grove# 09 Tue 7:30 pm – Pride Center Board Meeting, Highland Park†
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10 Wed 7:00 pm – QSpot Book Club, Ocean Grove# 7:30 pm – Wednesday Night Women’s Hang Out, Highland Park† 11 Thu 7:00 pm – Under the Rainbow, Highland Park† 7:30 pm -- PFLAG of North Jersey, South Orange; 908-7897489; pflagwaver@aol.com 7:30 pm -- Alternate Thursdays, Montclair; kjdinkin@comcast.net 12 Fri 7:00 pm – Young Men’s Social Network, Highland Park† 13 Sat 1:00 pm – Youth Drop-In, Highland Park† 1:00 pm – Women of Pride, Jersey City‡ 7:00 pm – Men’s Movie Night, Highland Park;† 7:30 pm – Dignity New Brunswick gay Catholic liturgy; 732968-9263; dignitynb@earthlink.net 14 Sun 2:00 pm – Male Drawing Session, Highland Park† 6:00 pm – Gay Men’s Classical Song Club, Kingston; pbrown02@worldnet.att.net 15 Mon 7:00 pm -- Support Group for Lesbians with Cancer, New Brunswick; 732-235-6781; slirzero@umdnj.edu 7:00 pm – HIV testing, Highland Park† 7:30 pm – Young Men’s Social Network, Highland Park† 7:30 pm – Raices Latinas LGBT, Highland Park† 7:30 pm – Anxiety Support Group, Highland Park† 16 Tue 5:00 pm – Creative Expressions, Ocean Grove# 7:30 pm – Come OUT and Play, Highland Park† 7:30 pm – LGBTQ for Social Justice, Highland Park† 17 Wed 6:30 pm - Positive People peer support group, Hackensack * 7:00 pm – JCLGO monthly meeting, Jersey City; 201-3335725; www.jclgo.org 7:00 pm – G-Rope, Highland Park† 7:30 pm – United in Grace discussion/support group, Jersey City; 201-946-0650; greg.perez@comcast.net 18 Thu 7:00 pm – GAAMC board meeting, Morristown; all GAAMC members are invited to attend. 7:30 pm – NJ Women Coming Out, Highland Park† 7:30 pm - PFLAG of Northwest NJ, Sparta; 973-729-9909 19 Fri 7:00 pm – Positive Women peer support group, Hackensack* 7:30 pm – Dignity New Brunswick social; 732-968-9263; dignitynb@earthlink.net 7:30 pm – Movie Night Out, Ocean Grove# 20 Sat 2:00 pm – NJ Hypnokink, Highland Park;† 2:30 pm – First & Third for GLBTI Youth, Princeton; 609-683-
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20 Sat 5155; www.HiTOPS.org 7:00 pm – Rainbow Bowling, Bradley Beach; 732-774-4540 7:00 pm – NJ Gay Film Society & Potluck Dinner Club, location TBA; gayfilms@bigfoot.com 21 Sun 4:00 pm – Dignity Metro NJ Mass, Maplewood; 973-8374040; Dignitymetronj@msn.com 4:00 pm – TrueSelves trans support group, Highland Park† 22 Mon 7:30 pm – NJ Rope Bite, Highland Park;† 23 Tue 7:30 pm – Lesbian Alliance of Princeton; 609-924-8174; Loisj@msn.com 7:30 pm -- PFLAG of Hunterdon County, Flemington; 908752-1370; pflaghc@yahoo.com 8:00 pm -- PFLAG of Bergen County, Paramus; 201-2870318; www.bergenpflag.org 8:00 pm – NJ Women, Secaucus; info@njwomen.org 8:30 pm – Men’s Social Night, Highland Park† 24 Wed 7:30 pm - United in Grace discussion/support group, Jersey City; 201-946-0650; greg.perez@comcast.net 7:30 pm – Wednesday Night Women’s Hang Out, Highland Park† 25 Thu 7:00 pm – Under the Rainbow, Highland Park† 26 Fri 27 Sat 1:00 pm – Youth Drop-In, Highland Park† 1:00 pm – Women of Pride, Jersey City‡ 7:00 pm – Gay Bowling, Asbury Lanes, Asbury Park; 732776-6160
Sangre Fria by Tony Puma Cardinal colors that bend through a prism of dew, post-diluvium, that omen of joy and hidden treasure and cute little people and a gay ambience, as flags and bunting and streamers and balloons reflect off crystal ball spin a dizzy array of brilliant polka-dots as patrons stand and converse and hold each other and dance and yell and greet each other in this communal place of convivial peace of mind and spirit as physical gyrations beg for a cold beer or a Cosmo or a frozen Margherita. The joys of a gay bar on an early Sunday morning, the crowd that awakens at mid-night to “partee”, live and love this life-style of sexual bends and blends and brands, of those who share a gentle love of same and seek this love, in this place. Cardinal colors awash in crimson, as this boisterous serenity is shattered by chaotic sounds of a weapon fired by hatred and cold blood. ©TPuma/MMXVI
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Buddies Corner by Raymond Welsh The week starting with Jersey Pride, we had a wonderful retreat for men living with and/or affected by HIV/AIDS, with the theme “Healing the Purpose of Our Lives”. The Bath Avenue House in Ocean Grove opened its doors and provided space at the Jersey shore for seven men seeking rest, renewal and focus. The environment, provider presentations, recreational activities, alternative healing professionals, and free time and space let us focus on what most gives us life and what least gives us life within a given space of time.
sky as the most powerful place the gives me awe but that I am not afraid of. I know that fear (of losing family, friends, financial… or not being useful) too often dictates my choices, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse. I realized that our non-gay friends and family have changed just as tremendously as we have. I see the effort, time, and talent to support events that tear down stigma and build health and healing in the LGBTQI communities more often from non-gay people and less often from us.
Sunday we celebrated 25 years of Jersey Pride in Asbury’s Sunset Park. Buddies had a table with a cornhole game, prizes, and resource information on HIV counseling, testing, and services. It was wonderful seeing how many people came out on this misty morning to create a celebration of our past, present, and future strides in liberation and equality.
It was hard to write this in the wake of those we lost in Florida. Thursday, I came home from a beautiful week and had the distractions of not being able to help a client who really needed help, my mom being verbally assaulted by someone, for the first time in my life being a victim of a bias incident, having a former friend trying to cause chaos in my life, and hearing news of current friends fading away. THESE DISTRACTIONS CAUSE HURT.
After everyone had a chance to celebrate pride, we enjoyed a pizza, salad, and jokes on the front porch watching the powerful sea that would be the backdrop for the rest of the week. We created two teams who would work together during specific activities and walk together when we went to the restaurants, beach, or Asbury’s attractions: the Boardwalk, Cookman Avenue shopping, “Bitchy Bingo” at Paradise, and karaoke at Georgie’s. Janssen Pharmaceutical’s luncheon at Crust and Crumble was about medical adherence and resistance; Merck provided a luncheon on how to create a good relationship with your physician at Day’s Starving Artist; and Walgreens hosted a breakfast with an extremely well presented talk on PrEP effects and usage. We had early morning walks on the boards, played beach bocce, swam in the ocean, and told stories of our lives. We did yoga and had massages and the healing touch of Reiki. We had healthy salads, fruit, and meals that consisted of the ole comfort meatloaf and mac, and Italian chicken Parm and sausage & peppers. Many would say this sounded more like a mini-vacation. It was better than a vacation because it took 7 accomplished men into a safe, comfortable environment enabling us to identify baggage, hurts, struggles, and negative behavior patterns. We were given the tasks of identifying things that made our guts chuckle, our minds thrive with wonder, and our hearts warm with joy, write them down, and then share them with our team. We talked about our unique roles in this world we live in, and how we would include and repeat more often that which makes us happy and gives us life. Amazingly this was all done in a non-judgmental self-perspective and sharing environment. I realized that I am most happy watching others share their unique talents and that I am least happy hearing people tear others down with negative comments and/or gossip. I identified the space where the water meets the
I share this with the GAAMC newsletter because ending HIV/AIDS is not just about the law, funding, and services. And gay rights are not just about meeting equality and justice. They both are about taking the time to look inward, evaluate where we stand, and what we want to move toward. They are about what matters personally, yet, also about finding ways to keep a team (community) strong so that from time to time we can retreat to eliminate that which drains life from us and then identify and run toward that which builds and renews life within. BEING COMMUNITY BRINGS HEALING. Ray Welsh, from Buddies of NJ, a premier HIV/AIDS service organization for people living with and affected by HIV/AIDS, is an out gay man living with the virus since 1995, when he was 25 years old. He manages fundraising, events, and Harrison House, a home to 7 adults living with HIV. Ray is also a Peer Support Group Coordinator who participates with the NJPG’s Gay Men’s Work Group and the Bergen/Passaic-Paterson HIV Services Planning Counsel.
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GAAMC Board Minutes
Gleanings
May 19, 2016
(continued from page 4)
Members: DeLeeuw,, Gannon, Gayle, Kennedy, Kohn, Rase, Sauer, Schaublin, Slicer, Suiter
President Obama made history June 24th by naming the site of the Stonewall riots the first national LGBT monument, an act many consider to be long overdue. The bar has been a gathering place after major moments in LGBT history, both for celebration and mourning. The Stonewall National Monument will protect 7.7 acres of land in Manhattan's Greenwich Village — Christopher Park, the Stonewall Inn bar, and the area streets and sidewalks that surround the area where the 1969 riots against police harassment took place. "The riots became protests, the riots became a movement, the movement ultimately became an integral part of America," said President Obama in a video about the history of the Stonewall riots. The National Parks Conservation Association celebrated the announcement, saying, "Now, thanks to this victory, this site of mass resistance that led to larger social and political change will now be preserved as part of our national heritage for future generations." (Advocate.com)
Non-Voting Attendees: Allen Neuner The meeting was called to order at 7:01. The minutes of the March meeting were approved (moved, Slicer; seconded, Sauer). Old/Current Business: The “Growing GAAMC” report from the board retreat was reviewed for progress made. Sherri talked to her contact regarding NYC Pride volunteering. Pride Guide will be completed by May 23. New Business: Contributions for the Memorial Day cookout will be solicited at Open Talk. Details about doing a members brunch at the Boonton Elks were discussed. Reports Treasurer (Andy Skurna) Challenge/Front Desk (Allen Neuner): For the Summer issue of Challenge, information for anything going on for July and August will have to be submitted by June 15. Webmaster (Andy Skurna) Programs (Sherri Rase) Socials (John DeLeeuw): There were 47 people at Pastabilities. Discussion Group Resources (Gordon Sauer) Development (Gordon Sauer) Social Action (Gordon Sauer) GAAMC Pride (Mickey Suiter): The dates for Jersey Pride and North Jersey Pride are June 5 and June 12, respectively. Outings (Jay Kohn) Public Relations(Dev Gannon) Ideas and Suggestions: Dev suggested a book swap. NJ Coalition to End Domestic Violence was suggested for June 2 or June 16. Possible discussion on rape trauma was suggested. A motion to adjourn was approved (moved, Schaublin; seconded, Gannon). The meeting was adjourned at 7:59.
Bulletin Board Announcing LGBT Babyboomers, a monthly informational workshops for LGBT adults 50 and above. Topics discussed include giving and receiving care, Medicare, Social Security, powers of attorney, wills, and living wills. For more information, contact Gordon Sauer at the Meetup group “LGBT Babyboomers” or gordonjav@earthlink.net.
The Pentagon, the largest U.S. employer of transgender people, will announce the end of its ban on trans troops July 1. Transgender activists have long fought for the lifting of the ban, as an estimated 15,000 trans people are already serving in the military. Most have not been open about their status, as they could face discharge; however, a few have come out and remained in the service. Top personnel officials plan to meet as early as Monday to finalize details of the plan, and Deputy Defense Secretary Bob Work could sign off on it by Wednesday. Defense Secretary Ash Carter would have to give final approval. Each branch of the military will have a year to implement new policies affecting recruiting, housing and uniforms for transgender troops. Eighteen other countries, including the U.K., Australia, Canada, and Israel, allow transgender people to serve openly in their militaries. (Advocate.com)
So Long, Farewell…? According to our records, the following members will see their memberships lapse in July or August. If your name is here in error, please contact the Webmaster. July Jacqueline B., Hawthorne Elizabeth C., Morris Plains Suzanne K, Springfield Wayne M., North Bergen Mitch R., Morristown August Michael F., Maplewood Linda L., West Milford William L., Maplewood You can renew by going to GAAMC.org, or at any Monday night meeting of GAAMC.
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Gay Activist Alliance in Morris County GAAMC Officers President (President@GAAMC.org) .......... Mickey Suiter VP Community Services (Info@GAAMC.org) ..................................................... Gordon Sauer VP Operations (Operations@GAAMC.org) ....................................................John DeLeeuw Secretary (Secretary@GAAMC.org) .......... Ron Kennedy Treasurer (Treasurer@GAAMC.org) ........... Andy Skurna
Trustees Dev Gannon, David Gayle, Jay Kohn, Sherri Rase, Richard Schaublin, Liz Slicer
Committee Chairs & Functional Officers Challenge (Challenge@GAAMC.org) ......... Allen Neuner Development (Discussions@GAAMC.org) .... Gordon Sauer Discussion Group Resources (Discussions@GAAMC.org) ..................................................... Gordon Sauer Information (FreeLibrary@GAAMC.org) ...... Andy Skurna Outings (Outings@GAAMC.org) .................... Jay Kohn Pride Events ..................................... Mickey Suiter Pride Guide (PrideGuide@GAAMC.org) ...... Andy Skurna Programs (Programs@GAAMC.org) .............. Sherri Rase Public Relations (PR@GAAMC.org) ............. Dev Gannon Social Action .................................... Gordon Sauer Socials (Socials@GAAMC.org) ................John DeLeeuw Webmaster (Webmaster@GAAMC.org) ....... Andy Skurna
GAAMC, the Gay Activist Alliance in Morris County, has served New Jersey’s gay, lesbian bisexual, transgendered, and intersexed communities since 1972. GAAMC is a notfor-profit volunteer-run organization that provides social, educational, and outreach programs. GAAMC also offers opportunities for individuals to become politically active on issues related to the GLBTI communities. Our intent is to maintain a positive, healthy, respectful, and supportive environment in a safe space. Meetings are held every Monday evening at the Morristown Unitarian Fellowship, 21 Normandy Heights Rd., Morris Township, NJ (near the Morris Museum). Discussion groups usually meet from 7:00 to 8:00. The evening’s program usually starts shortly after 8:00. Refreshments are available. For program information, check our home page (see below). Members and non-members are always welcome. Annual membership dues are: Regular, $40/single, $70/couple; Students/Seniors, $30/single, $60/couple. How to reach GAAMC Mail: PO Box 137, Convent Station, NJ 07961 Telephone: 973-285-1595 E-Mail: info@gaamc.org Home page: http://www.gaamc.org Mail List: http://groups.yahoo.com/subscribe/gaamc