gair rhydd - Issue 767

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Sports desk analyses another woeful summer for British sportsmen and women Plus: Why Cardiff University has been to the Olympics

SPORT P. 26

THE ICING ON THE CAKE Cardiff University and University of Wales College of Medicine unite in search of world class status

By David Doyle News Editor SCORCHING SUNSHINE made a brief appearance at the launch party for the merger between Cardiff University and UWCM before it was replaced by a traditional Cardiff downpour.

Inside the marquee proceedings were fortunately less turbulent than the weather. The 250 guests were treated to drinks, a buffet lunch and the tranquil

music of a string quartet.

The event marked the union of the two institutions which, it is believed, will improve Cardiff’s status as a world class university.

The future excellence of the university was at the centre of a speech from the new chairman of the council which will preside over the newly merged university, Sir Keith Peters.

Sir Keith, who returns to Cardiff from the University of Cambridge where he was Regius Professor of

Physics, told gair rhydd that the merger was ‘necessary’ to maintain and improve on Cardiff’s excellence.

‘You can’t stay excellent if you don’t change with the times’ said Sir Keith, ‘with modern advances in medicine and complicated matters of ethics it is intrinsic that a great university has a great medical school.’

Sir Keith also expressed his pleasure in returning to Cardiff and joked, ‘I’m delighted it’s rain-

ing – nothing changes.’ He praised the vice-chancellors of both merging institutions, Dr David Grant and Professor Stephen Tomlinson, as ‘the architects of this wonderful new university.’

Both vice-chancellors were keen to return their praise. “Sir Keith will bring a huge amount of skill to the post,” said Dr Grant.

Professor Tomlinson said that with such a prestigious medical professional on board a world-

Photo: AJ Silvers

gair rhydd

CARDIFF’S STUDENT WEEKLY

rhydd

ISSUE 767. SEPTEMBER 1 2004

class status was inevitable.

Commenting on Sir Keith he said: “He wouldn’t have accepted if he didn’t believe that we could achieve the dream.”

After the speeches the two vice-chancellors cut the merger cake to symbolise the birth of the new Cardiff University before heading back to the buffet and the welcome return of the sun.

Your guide to what the merger means for you: p. 14

News

Page 2

September 1 2004

grnews@cf.ac.uk

a glance

News Editorial Letters Taf-Od Interviews Media Merger Special Jobs & Money Health Features Competitions Listings Problem Page Five Minute Fun Sport

1 5 9 10 11 12 14 16 17 18 20 22 23 24 25

EDITOR Gary Andrews DEPUTY EDITOR James Anthony

ASSISTANT TO THE EDITOR Elaine Morgan NEWS Dave Doyle, Will Talmage, Jonathan Astle, Paul Dicken POLITICS Caroline Farwell EDITORIAL AND OPINION Alys Southwood SPORT John Stanton, Thom Airs LISTINGS Hannah Muddiman, Jim Sefton TELEVISION Holly Howitt-Dring, Will Dean, John Widdop, Katie Brunt LETTERS Perri Lewis GRAB Shell Plant TAF-OD Position Vacant MEDIA Bec Storey HEALTH Jess Boydell FEATURES Emma Langley, Hannah Perry JOBS AND MONEY Carly O’Donnell COMEDY PROBLEM Matt Hill HEAD OF PHOTOGRAPHY Maria Cox, AJ Silvers PROOF READERS Jasmine Cooper, Alys Southwood CONTRIBUTORS

Laura Murphy, Jemma Gander, Gemma Williams, Janine Jones, James Cole, KerryLynne Doyle, Kat Fletcher, Tom Wellingham, Laura Chamberlian, Gary Rees, Jim Sefton, Andrew Kowalik, Cerys Powell, Dave Jones

ADDRESS University Union Park Place Cardiff CF10 3QN EDITORIAL 02920 781434 02920 781436 ADVERTISING 0845 1300667 EMAIL gairrhydd@cardiff.ac.uk VISITORS Find us on the 4th floor of the Students’ Union

BRAIN DRAIN

By Will Talmage News Editor

LECTURERS AT Cardiff University are being tempted to move to English Universities where they can earn higher salaries due to the introduction of top-up fees.

Jenny Willott, a Liberal Democrat delegate from Cardiff, said: “Cardiff University has already admitted English universities are starting to poach staff.”

This financial crisis has been caused by Labour’s new plans for higher education. The government is scrapping the £1,000 a year fee in favour of universities charging up to £3,000 a year if they admit sufficient number of working-class students.

The plan for variable fees is set to be introduced in 2006.

The Welsh Assembly, however, has guaranteed not to allow uni-

SUMMER SUCCESS

By Laura Murphy Reporter CARDIFF UNIVERSITY Students’ Union ended last year in style as 7000 students descended on Coopers’ field in the grounds of Cardiff Castle for the first summer ball held there for four years.

The move came after complaints about sky-high bar prices at the 2003 event, held in the Cardiff International Arena, with some students paying nearly 5 pounds per drink.

The end of year extravaganza treated students to such entertainment as fire jugglers, a coconut shy and a jazz band in an attempt to insure their party-goers got their money’s worth.

Three large marquees catered for every musical taste, from the funky jazz of union regulars Onion Funk in the Budweiser tent, through to the resident Come Play DJs in the Carlsberg tent, and on to chart successes on the main stage.

This year’s Reading and Leeds festival openers, local boys Goldie Lookin’ Chain, got the crowd going with their distinctive brand of Welsh rap before Pop Idol reject, Andrew Scott-Lee, took to the stage.

Brit Award winners and fellow Pop Idol veterans Liberty X wowed the crowds with old favourites and offered a preview of new material from their forthcoming album.

Fresh from his exploits in the jungle Peter Andre, took to the stage as the headlining act of the evening, and belted through a few of his more memorable hits.

Headlining the Carling tent was Radio One DJ Trevor Nelson.

First year student Fatima BibbiMannan said: ‘Although the bars were packed this was a great way to end the year in a fantastic setting’.

versities in Wales to charge topup fees for the duration of the present assembly – or until 2007.

This move by the Welsh Assembly may result in Welsh universities facing a ‘brain-drain’ to across the border, where lecturers from Wales will move to England due to the higher salaries available.

Ms. Willott also said: “The Assembly government has won the power to control student financing, but has not yet said how it will guarantee Welsh universities the cash they need to make sure they do not lose the best staff and the best students.”

The Welsh Assembly has pledged to compensate institutions financially for not introducing top-up fees, although how and when this will be honoured is

unknown. Until this is resolved the financial situation will remain a constant threat to Welsh universities and their staff.

In response Cardiff University Vice-Chancellor Dr. David Grant said: “We look forward to working with the Independent Commission established by the Welsh Assembly to give full consideration to future funding policy and the devolution of the student support funding to Wales.”

“It is vital that any changes in funding mechanisms in Wales are properly coordinated with changes in England. We urgently need to be in a position to inform current and prospective students about our future policies.”

He added: Furthermore, Welsh universities must not be disadvantaged in comparison with universities in England if they are to continue to play an important role as drivers of social, economic and cultural development.

Brake-in Union security fails to deter bicycle thieves

Photo: AJ Silvers

At

EASY TARGET: The bicycle stands behind the union steps

By Jemma Gander Reporter A CARDIFF student is furious at a lapse in union security that let thieves steal his bicycle over the summer.

AJ Silvers, who is about to start the third year of a BA in English Literature, locked his bicycle to the bars behind the Students’ Union steps on the fourth of August.

AJ alleges that the security cameras in their current position, which doesn’t cover the bike area, offer no security for student cyclists.

When the incident was initially reported to a member of the union security AJ was told that the situation there was stupid and that bicycles were frequently stolen.

In response to the incident the Head of Union Security, Larry Daley re-iterated the safety precautions all bike owners should consider, such as security locks, knowing the bicycle’s frame number and the removal of access Mr Daley said “If you have any concerns contact Endsleigh insurance who are currently occupying

residence on the ground floor of the Students’ Union”.

AJ feels that the current security situation for the bike area is in need of revision in order to prevent further crimes. AJ said: ”About £900 worth of mountain bike has been stolen. This is something I brought up a year ago but nothing’s been done.”

In response Steve Simmonds, Trading and Operations Manager of Cardiff University Students’ Union told gair rhydd: “The Union takes the safety and security of students and their belongings very seriously.”

Mr Simmonds went on to say: We are substantially upgrading CCTV coverage around the building. The new system has the capacity for 512 cameras. There isn’t a plan at the moment to put a camera specifically there.We will look into matters as and when they are required.”

AJ, however, feels that this is too little, too late.”I’s just diabolical. It should have been fixed years ago. New students’ coming to this university are going to want to know they can store their bikes in safety.”

Cardiff mourns emminent benefactor

Sir Julian Hodge 1904-2004

By Jemma Gander Reporter SIR JULIAN Hodge, ex-fellow and generous benefactor of Cardiff University, recently died aged 99 at his home in Jersey.

Staff and students alike have expressed their sorrow at his death.

He was a past treasurer and president of the Wales Institute of Science and Technology which amalgamated with Cardiff University in 1967.

Sir Julian gave a lot to Cardiff University, both with his time and financial support. The Cardiff Business School building was erected in his name in 2002 as a reminder of his generosity towards the University.

Sir Julian not only supported the Business School but gave generously to other areas, such as postgraduate study in English Literature. Sir Julian was also instrumental to the prizes attributed to both undergraduate and postgraduate students in their search for excellence valued at some £4,500 a year.

He will be greatly missed by the staff of Cardiff University.

Professor Roger Mansfield, Director of Cardiff Business School said: “During my whole time in Cardiff, which started in 1976, he was enormously supportive in many ways in addition to his financial generosity. I feel I have lost a long term supporter and great friend”.

Sir Julian Hodge was born in London on the 15th October 1904. The son of a plumber he spent his childhood years in Pontllanfraith, South Wales. From humble beginnings as an assistant in his aunt’s chemist store in Blackwood Sir Julian went on to become a railway clerk.

He began evening classes at Cardiff University that lead to him being a qualified Corporate Accountant in 1930 and continued to establish many businesses throughout his career. This culminated in the founding of the Julian Hodge Bank which was integral in establishing Cardiff as a financial centre.

All students and staff at Cardiff University would like to send their condolences to his family and will always remember the generosity and support Sir Julian Hodge has given throughout his life and career.

News

September 1 2004

Page 3

grnews@cf.ac.uk

By Gemma Williams Reporter LEGISLATION TO curb binge-drinking has divided the student community with critics accusing the government of failing to address the problem that costs the taxpayer £40 billion a year.

With 38 per cent of 16 – 24 year olds regularly binge drinking it is students who will be heavily affected by the success or failure of an antibinge drinking campaign. In response the government is considering two methods of tackling irresponsible drinking.

The first is continental-style 24hour drinking licenses which have the backing of many police officers.

They believe that staggering closing times will lessen the binge drink culture evident in most bars and clubs across Cardiff during the weekend. It is considered that different closing times will mean less disorder on the streets at any one time and may even boost Cardiff’s tourism industry Jenny Longbottom, College President of Life Sciences, Health and Medicine said that the 24-hour license had “the potential to help because people won’t feel the pressure to throw drinks down their throats because it’s almost 11” but add that people could see it as a licence to get drunk all day.

Richard Hall, pub manager of The End in Cathays said: “The 24-hour licence won’t affect binge drinking at all, from a business point of view only a few bars would be able to get the license. Pubs in residential areas wouldn’t be able to get it at all.’

The other alternative is a clamp down on cheap drinks promotions and aggressive alcohol marketing.

Jenny Longbottom fears that this will only make students poorer.

She is not alone in her fears that increased prices will not stop increased drinking. One Cathays pub regular, who preferred to remain

nameless, said: “You see them on St Mary Street on a Friday and Saturday night, they’re all getting pissed on £3 pints. It’s the older, more responsible punters who really getting hit.”

A responsible attitude is important for a number of reasons and it is not only the police who are supporting measures to tackle the crisis. Health experts have warned that the binge drink culture now could cause problems, especially to women’s health, by their early 30’s. This will include cirrhosis of the liver, nerve damage and difficulties during pregnancy.

These fears coincide with a steep increase in drinking among female students. A reported 66 per cent of women at university now drink above the recommended weekly limit.

Cardiff police have now launched an eight week campaign in response to excessive drinking. This includes an increased police presence on the weekend, a mobile police station in St. Mary’s street and a crack-down on the sale of alcohol to people who are judged to be drunk.

Mark Hastings, Director of Communications at the British Beer and Pub Association said: “we welcom the crack down on drunken thugs and bad pubs and those licensees who encourage irresponsible drinking.”

Despite the pressure from the drinks industry to maintain the aggressive marketing of alcoholic drinks the government seems to be addressing the growing problem of binge-drinking.

A recent advert by Dutch brewer Heineken that suggested that their lager was ‘better’ because it was stronger has been withdrawn recently by the advertising watchdog Ofcom.

There is still a steep rise in binge drinking, even among children as young as eleven. For the student community any resolution will have to placate feelings that bar prices are already too high whilst promoting a responsible attitude to alcohol.

HOW DO YOU CURE A £40 BILLION HANG-OVER?

The future of the student drinking culture hangs in the balance

Fee fi fo fum - we want the money of the Englishman

By Paul Dicken News Editor AS THE ‘future of higher education’ begins throughout England, the question of how Welsh universities will fare in relation to institutions across the border remains unanswered.

The restructuring of funding for higher education in England will begin in September but Welsh universities will wait until 2007 before making a decision wether to implement variable fees.

Deputy President of NUS Wales, Andrew Wilson, suggested that the organisation believes there will be

a negative impact on Welsh universities. He went on to say that the possibility of financial incentives drawing academics towards English universities is a concern.

By 2006 English universities will be able to charge up to £3,000 for tuition, but this cap on fees is not permanent and will be lifted by 2010.

In the long term this may mean that the UK higher education system could resemble the current American system, where there is a distinct gulf between elite universities and smaller institutions.

This is a system that places huge restrictions on access and is something the government hopes

to tackle through ‘the Office for Fair Access, a body that will hopefully regulate tuition fee charges to maintain fair access to higher education.

For Cardiff University the shortterm effects may be problematic.

A spokesperson said that the university is: “concerned not to be disadvantaged in comparison with English institutions, by changes in funding mechanisms.”

This seems to align with previous comments from Dr David Grant, the Vice-Chancellor at Cardiff University, which supported the underlying principles of the Higher Education bill.

The concerns of the university

are shared by the assembly government, who issued a statement iterating that the assembly is currently working with the Higher Education Funding Council for Wales to ensure Welsh institutions “should not be disadvantaged by not being allowed to charge variable fees in 2006/7.”

With the idea of regional pay negotiations and variable fees being introduced there is a valid concern that smaller universities in Wales will suffer while the best education is charged at premium rate by the larger universities.

Barry Johnson, from the Welsh Association of University Teachers, said the AUT is planning to hold a

consultation exercise at the beginning of next term to gauge the mood amongst academics towards the introduction and possible effects of funding changes.

He suggested that the position of the AUT is that it doesn’t know how Welsh universities will be affected in the next few years.

Early AUT statements to the Guardian in January of this year insisted that academics wouldn’t benefit from the introduction of top-up fees.

The statements call for “a rounded, well funded and fully supported HE” that the government proposals did not offer.

September 1 2004

Editorial & Opinion

Page 5

gropinion@cf.ac.uk

World class or middle class?

Caroline Farwell on the impact of top-up fees will have on student choice A fter months of public and parliamentary scrutiny this summer saw radical changes for the future face of higher education. Following the tightest Commons vote in the history of the British government and a fierce revolt from Labour backbenchers, the government’s controversial higher education bill received Royal Assent on July 1 2004.

Education Secretary Charles Clarke called the act a ‘landmark in higher education’. Clarke claimed that the changes allow Britain to ‘maintain its world class university education’ while at the same time ‘protecting access for students from poor backgrounds’.

The government says that the increased fees will fund universities to improve laboratories, lecture theatres, student accommodation and lecturers salaries. But what is the point of all these improvements if there are no students at university to teach?

Research evidence has indicated that more and more students are being put off the idea of further education all together. Deterred by the prospect of graduating with substantial debts, students are understandably failing to recognise the benefits and ‘fairness’ that the government claim to offer through its education reforms.

So from September 2006 new undergraduates can expect a variable charge of up to £3,000 per year for their university education. The plans that were announced in January of this year will give universities the freedom to set their own figure for top-up fees.

As the actual costs of degree courses differ, variable fees will apparently account for any disparities.

Broadly speaking, courses in science and engineering are more expensive to run than psychology or English for example, due to equipment costs.

This then presents universities with the problem of whether to set fees based upon equipment costs or course popularity. Declining applications for science and engineering courses suggest that universities may benefit more from the latter.

This increasing marketisation of higher education is creating serious consequences for Britain’s ‘world class education system’. The government says that the country’s universities are under funded by £9 billion. They argue that the taxpayer should not have to subsidise for degrees that benefit graduates on a personal level. Ten years ago this may well have been the case, but recent misguided government targets have exposed a flaw in this assumption. It presumes that degrees will continue to benefit the individual, despite the supposed decline in value of a university education.

The problem with Labour’s targets that want to see 50% of the 18-30 age group in university by 2010 is that it

PROTEST: But will students be able to afford university now the HE bill has been passed? will inevitably lead to a rise in second rate universities. As degrees are increasing in number they are losing their worth.

Evidence of this can be seen in the closing gap between universities and further education colleges. In 1992 the Conservative government made the mistake of allowing polytechnics to call themselves universities. This led to an increase in the number of new degree courses of questionable value.

And today we are confronting the consequences; so much so that employers are now complaining that there are too many graduates struggling in the job market with ‘indifferent qualifications’. Hastily handing out the ‘university-educated’ label may well enhance government statistics and artificially satisfy their targets, but it also means that graduates are no longer distinguished in the employment market.

So this is where variability enters into the equation. The idea of abolishing a fixed fee abandons the assumption that all universities are equally deserving. Charles Clarke insists that ‘variability remains key’ and is essential to the economic future of the country.

But the truth is that in the long term the new system could lead to a damaging free market in higher

education.

Is it not surely just another step towards marketisation? This time taking the form of an invitation for good universities to charge much more than bad ones. Better institutions would charge higher fees, attracting more advanced staff and improved facilities. This will then make it considerably harder for poorer students to get a decent education.

“Students have effectively been turned into customers” The fact is that top-up fees will create a two-tier education system.

First-class universities with the best courses have been given the permission to charge a premium rate and more students have been forced to choose their degree based on cost.

This then constrains those from low income families to opt for cheaper courses, which in turn has subsidiary implications for later employment opportunities.

The Department of Education and

Skills has countered these claims, stating that with the system of top-up fees undergraduates will pay nothing up front. Yet this is clearly failing to persuade students who recognise that a university education doesn’t necessarily guarantee them a job after graduation. More and more young people are choosing to go straight into employment, when three or four years down the line they could be in the same position as a graduate but without a debt in excess of £10, 000.

Furthermore with the creation of the Office for Fair Access (OFFA) the government must feel that it has sufficiently covered it’s back…at least enough to counter accusations of creating a market lottery out of higher education anyway.

Universities will only be permitted to charge the maximum fee of £3000 if they sign an Access Agreement with OFFA. This aims to ensure that disadvantaged students are not deterred from their chosen university because of higher fees. It also offers a sweetener to students from low income households in the form of a bursary of at least £300 provided by those universities wishing to charge the full £3,000.

So will this mean that some good students will be turned away because they are rich? Or perhaps it will

humiliate the talented but disadvantaged? Either way, OFFA will prove a test for the government and highlight the limitations of state intervention in the admissions process.

It appears as though we are following America in forging a free market out of further education. In the USA fees currently range from just over $4,000 (£2,200) a year for the cheapest courses in state-supported public universities, to more than $30,000 (£16,600) a year in private institutions However, ministers in the UK have made a solid commitment not to raise the £3000 cap until 2009. In addition, any changes made at this time will require a vote from both Houses of Parliament.

John Brennan, the chief executive of the Association of Colleges, notes that after this time the Bill essentially allows universities the unlimited ability to increase tuition fees. Some of the more reputable universities in the country have already expressed their concerns that a rate of £3000 is still inadequate to meet the demands of university spending requirements.

The possibility of raising the cap fee seems both implausible and absurd, bearing in mind that students have already been put off higher education since the £3000 fee was proposed. Increased top-up fees would seriously compromise the chances of young people from working-class backgrounds to attend certain universities.

Top-up fees will bring more private money into the education system, apparently in addition to government funding. MPs have rejected the amendment that would have meant the government could not claw back university funding made from increased fees.

This therefore leaves us with verbal assurances from cabinet ministers that the money generated from top-up fees will be in addition to government funding. But how far can we trust these promises? New Labour’s history of failing to honour manifesto pledges in education offers one answer.

Take as an example Blair’s 1997 election assurance not to introduce tuition fees. Within a year the Labour government had brought in tuition fees. And more recently the 2001 election manifesto stated that the Labour party would not introduce topup fees, and no more than two years later the party announced plans for top-up fees of up to £3000 a year.

Students have effectively been turned into customers, left to shop around for an affordable university education. This not only undermines the quality of a degree, but its suitability and relevance to the individual. Government opportunism has clearly prevailed over political credibility, so much so that higher education has been left to foot the bill.

Editorial & Opinion

Page 6

September 1 2004

gropinion@cf.ac.uk

gair rhydd

FREE WORDS Fantastic Freshers FOR MANY readers of this issue this will be the first time they can feel they have properly arrived in Cardiff. The readers are, of course, the first year freshers and new postgraduate students and on behalf of Cardiff University Student’s Union, gair rhydd would extends a very warm welcome to you.

Arriving at university having only just finished A-level examinations is both daunting and exciting. On one hand you are leaving behind the security of your home and family but on the other it is a chance to become more independent.

This is naturally where freshers’ week comes in. No doubt new students have already heard many stories about these infamous seven days. As current students can confirm some of the hype is true, some of it is a myth.

However it is not an exaggeration to say that freshers’ week is just the start of an amazing three year plus experience and this is aided in no small part by your very own Students’ Union.

The entertainments they provide are a key part of the settling in process and a great chance to meet new people. In addition this will be one of the few times you can go out during the year and not have to worry about getting up for lectures the next morning.

But the union is about more than just going out and a great way to meet people is through joining societies and sports clubs. These cater for almost every interest from Aikido to A Capella singing and all of them have stalls at the societies and AU fairs.

It’s at this time that we’ll plug the wonder that is student media. If you’re remotely interested in writing or the media or just fancy having a crack at something different then gair rhydd or Xpress Radio are excellent societies to join. Pop up and see us on the fourth floor at any time – we’re always welcoming new contributors and our section editors will be happy to chat to you about getting involved.

Whatever you do with your time at university the most important thing is to enjoy yourself.

University Perspectives

By Andrew Kowalik Graduate (BA)

J

ust as you will eventually all leave university, graduate and get a job, that is where I’m at on the life o’meter. A substratum of similar occurrences that link us all from the time we decide to apply for university until we leave.

And there are many trials along the road. The position one often finds oneself in during the university saga: on the brink of the unknown. And the most important bit of advice I’m going to give you is that, for the sake of seeming obvious, don’t leave it to the last minute. That goes for everything.

So, back to the unknown. Going in, we experience the surreal episode of moving into halls/houses with our own little versions of big brother going on.

Of course there is going to lectures, either the very first time or when coming back from summer. That’s another world of excited intrigue, go explore.

It’s time to get into societies; university isn’t just slaving for a degree. Then, here you will be: looking for jobs/already in a job/starting a job soon. This is the cut out and keep, when you’ve graduated you can circle one of the options. If you intend to go on to further study, this will still apply to you, just later.

The prospect of starting work for the first time after uni is not dissimilar to starting university. Except that earning a wage does get you out of bed, whereas early lectures have often been found empty of a large proportion of the students. Just as I find myself wondering what tax band I’m now in, or just exactly how much council tax is going rip into my salary. I did venture to improve my employability; I had a good summer job, and I visited the careers office on more than just a few occasions. This does at least something to calm the nerves on that unknown that is the new job.

What did you do in preparation to come to uni? Buy a few essentials like pots and pans, an iron and a new bunch of stationary. I hope you didn’t get carried away and go for Shrek 2 stuff,: this is not back to school, and just like going into work a certain reserve, in the right places, is necessary. I won’t be wearing any cartoon character ties thank you so very much.

But I will certainly miss living as a student, the perks where lifestyle is concerned beat anything on earth.

Wake up about 9ish, get up noonish.

And those lazy afternoon-long pub siestas. And so, just like the early hours of the morning, these junctures of entering/leaving university are filled with both anticipation and exhilaration.

start university this September.

I’m writing this in the first week of August, so I haven’t got my ‘A’ level results, which means I don’t know which hall I’ll be living in – or even if I’ll get into the university I want. I’m doubly nervous because I won’t just be leaving home, I’ll be moving abroad – I was born and brought up in Hong Kong.

I have lots of relatives living in Britain and both my older sisters are at uni there, so I’m not too nervous, but I do feel like I’m losing my training wheels.

I’m really looking forward to Freshers’ week: my sisters have told me to behave, but I don’t think they did. I definitely want to go to the AU fair and join the hockey team; and it also sounds like a good way to meet people with similar interests. My oldest sister, Victoria, says you need to get out and meet people: the worst thing you can do is to sit in your room. It’s good advice, but if I hear any more advice from either of my older sisters I’ll scream.

My teachers claim that ‘A’ levels are the hardest qualification to get, the implication being that a degree will be simple in comparison. I know that you do fewer hours of lectures and no one’s

checking up on you, but doesn’t that mean you have to do more work on your own? Besides, when I was studying for my final exams this spring I was living at home, so my mother did my laundry and bought and cooked my meals and drove me back and forth: as a student I’ll have to do all that for myself as well as studying. And, on a more frivolous note, TV in Britain is better than at home: yet another, but more enjoyable, distraction I am really looking forward to having my own room and my own rules. I want to stay up, or out, until whenever I fancy and then lie in until I fancy getting up, without being asked “what time will you begetting home?”. I’ll miss my friends from home, but I’m we’ll stay in touch . A lot of my schoolmates are going to university in Britain, so hopefully we’ll meet up – or else I’ll see them when I go home at Christmas.

At the moment I’m most intersted in how I’m going to decorate my room: I’m constantly poring over catalogues, choosing the crockery and cutlery and cookware I want, as well as duvet covers and sheets and bedside lamps. To be properly student, I’ve also started thinking about posters. At the moment I’m on a rigorous Big Brother watching schedule (that’ll sound dated by the time you read this – but Michelle’s a clingy bitch, isn’t she?) and am tempted by ‘Enders.

women, men, ladyboys, ladyboys when they don’t tell you they’re ladyboys, Jordan, smelly feet, sour milk, calibre, alcopops, falling asleep with a glass of beer in your hand, cutting yourself shaving, spam emails, telemarketers, calendars where only January looks decent, realising you’ve forgotten to save your work when the computer’s crashed, Christmas adverts in October, mould, Avid fucking Merrion, apostrophes being put in the wrong place, hail, pies, football, tepid water, chavs, tattoos, easy listening music, expensive phone sex, flip-flops, mosquitos, Harold Shipman, pizza for breakfast, diaries, Oxford, houndstooth, batteries, Linda Barker, town planning, aromatherapy, bad porn actresses, weeds, blood, minimum wage, adverts that try too hard, neon, the Fimbles, the Teletubbies, insomnia, Abi Titmuss, ticket prices, baldness,

homophobia, allergies, blood tests, skateboarders, never being able to find sunglasses, Avril Lavigne, crappy remakes of old films, Billie Piper, S4C, condoms, annoying ringtones, people on trains, not having any reception on your mobile, being harassed by people for charity money in the street, long distance relationships, chocolate, squirrels, small spaces, parking in Cardiff, shopping, late night opening, bank holidays, chewing gum, spitting, luggage allowance for long haul flights, tax returns, fat people in thongs, holiday photographs, early morning lectures, late afternoon lectures, lectures when you usually like to have lunch, hangovers, Linda Barker, dodgy European roaming, enrolment, immigration, morris dancers, overhead lighting, Shirley Bassey, aliens, Quark, Elvis, George W Bush, hard work and tofu.

By Cerys Powell Pre-Fresher

I

gair rhydd’s

ROOM 101

Together at last

This week the Room 101 was compiled from the contributions of everyone in the office today, including unfortunate people who don’t work for the paper but happened to pop in.

The conclusion- the office don’t like:

AFTER A YEAR of discussion and compromise between the two institutions it is a wonderful sight to see Cardiff University and the College of Medicine finally merge.

At lot of hard work has been put in to ensure the merger went ahead as smoothly as possible and it appears to been successful so far..

No doubt this year will throw up a few teething problems but this is only to be expected and should take nothing away from the achievement so far.

Merger will benefit both institutions and is another positive step towards establishing Cardiff as a world-class university.

Joggers, people who cycle on the pavement, Linda Barker, film remakes, Michael Moore, Michael Winner, JK Rowling not having written Harry Potter six, summer jobs, lairy blokes, slow bar staff, people barging into you on the tube, rude shop staff, paper cuts, reality shows about badly behaved kids, vomit on the pavement, the man, Apple Macs, not being able to type the pound sign, slow old people in shopping centres, American tourists, sweetcorn, gherkins, dog poo, hormonal and protective seagulls, people who smoke in the non-smoking area, Jumping Jaks, Merthyr Tydfil, red tape, early mornings, Satan,

people who don’t like badgers, rooms without air conditioning, British weather, Sport being at the back of the paper, flies, pigeons, wasps, bills, council tax, Manchester United supporters, pubic stubble, argyle, Riath Al-Samarrai, funny shaped cups that go soggy and don’t stand up and can’t hold more than two gulps of water, ex-Presidents, bulls in China shops, not having a donkey, von Dutch, Burberry, arsey bouncers, dirt under your fingernails, sand on your towel, Pat Sharp, older sisters’ best friends, drunken displays of nudity, underendowed willies, pigeon shit, when the person before you uses all the loo roll and doesn’t replace it, Linda Barker, rashes, computer mouses, sleeping policemen, interfering neighbours, Lyn Scully, the columnist in the Mirror, Page 3 girls’ political comments, the Royal family, Student Union council, fluffiness, feminists,

September 1 2004

Editorial & Opinion

Page 7

gropinion@cf.ac.uk

NUS SPEAKS OUT

NUS President Kat Fletcher on why you should use your vote in the next election W e believe that students are more than just learners, Students don’t exist in a vacuum we’re citizens of our communities, citizens of the UK, and citizens of the world and politics affects us too. That’s why I’d like to talk to you about NUS’ plans for the general election.

It may come as a surprise to some of you, but the only person who knows when the next general election will be is Mr Blair. We could be looking at a general election at any point from now until early June 2006. But the smart money is on May next year, so as a movement, we need to be ready to put student issues back on the agenda and make sure we get our voices heard.

“You’re not too busy, you should care, and it does matter. You can make a difference” In contrast to the elections of 1997 and 2001, a Labour victory no longer looks as easy or as comprehensive.

This election won’t be a foregone conclusion, and it won’t be simply "going through the motions" like 2001.

Every vote really will count, and all the parties will have to be flat out to persuade us that they offer the best choice for this country.

NUS is in a strong position as a campaigning organisation: we have 5.2 million members, spread across 710 student unions. We have members in every Parliamentary constituency and

in some, such as Cardiff Central, City of York and Durham, students form a majority of the voters. In others, we are a significant bloc.

Students are unlikely to vote. Less than a quarter of the under 30’s voted in the 2001 general election. Although we have members of all ages, NUS is the largest mass membership organisation of young people in the country. It’s vital that we organise our members to vote, so politicians can’t afford to ignore our concerns.

Which is why this year NUS will be running its biggest voter registration and get out the vote campaigns. And we need you to make it happen. We have to make sure that students get registered to vote at freshers’ fairs. We have to make sure that colleges and universities are meeting their legal requirements to register students in halls.

And we have to make sure that we’re reaching non-resident and off-site students. You won’t be on your own.

Every student union will get campaign packs - making sure you can involve and empower your students.

In the lead-up to polling day, we need to use student newspapers, radio stations, websites and TV to promote the election and explain why students should use their vote alongside campaigns to increase participation in our student union democracy.

We need to engage with the issues that the election will be fought on.

Don’t get me wrong NUS’ role in this election is not to encourage students to vote for or against particular parties, It’s not for local unions and NUS to tell students how to vote. It’s up to us to provide information about the issues to enable students to make up their own minds.

I’d like to see every student union holding an open hustings meeting for all the prospective candidates, to

opening the meetings to the local community, enabling students and other residents to put their concerns to the people that want to represent them.

washing machine. It’s time to get back into the swing of lectures, going out more than you can afford, and delicately balancing deadlines with a social life and I think it’s great.

My first year at Cardiff was certainly a fantastic experience. I learned how to cook, admittedly with a few disasters; I think I am the only student in Cardiff who can mess up Super Noodles (too much water = disaster) and burn a pizza so thoroughly.

I managed to learn how to use the laundry (i.e. jeans and dryers don’t mix), met some amazing people and most importantly, I enjoyed my course.

All of this combined to make my year at Cardiff one of the best I’ve ever had.

Of course, learning to budget wasn’t one of my favourite experiences. I can remember many a time when seeing an unaffordable pretty pair of shoes nearly reduced me to tears in the past year.

There have also been many occasions when my friends have had to drag me away a shop whimpering over a top that costs more than three weeks of food shopping.

My passion for shopping definitely needed to be downsized as I embraced the student lifestyle. Yet even on a

“NUS’ core values are participation, representation, collectivism and democracy” We need to make sure students know about the parties’ positions on various issues, about the voting records of current MPs and about the opinions of the candidates. Student media should run interviews with the candidates.

Union officers should meet with the people that want their votes to make sure the message gets across: don’t ignore us, don’t ignore our concerns.

Nationally, NUS won’t be idle. At the last election, we had cause to be optimistic - four years ago, the student movement secured a pledge not to introduce top-up fees in the Labour manifesto. Yet three years later, this government has brought in top-up fees of £3000 per year.

This year, we’re going to be writing a Manifesto for Students, setting out the top demands of students in further and higher education from the next government. It’ll be a key tool for you in your unions as you meet with current MPs and prospective candidates, and for us as we lobby the parties to take on board our concerns.

Our fight for a fair funding system and a decent education for all students in Further Education and Higher Education is not over!

NUS’ core values are about

participation, representation, collectivism and democracy. Which is why, this year to come, there is nothing more important for you to be doing that making sure your students use their vote.

Sometimes, in the UK, we forget how important it is to vote. We forget that when rights aren’t used, they may be taken away. We forget the battles that those before us fought in order to secure the right to vote for everyone.

We take our democracy for granted.

So when your students say to you "I’m too busy", "it doesn’t affect me", say to them: "Politics decides how much tax you pay, what time you have to leave the pub, whether your train arrives on time. It decides whether you can afford somewhere to live, what your

children are taught, whether you have to pay to see a doctor." They may say "It doesn’t matter", "I can’t make a difference", "none of the parties represent me". Well, here, today, I say to you, and I want you to say to your students: You’re not too busy, you should care, and it does matter. You can make a difference. And if you think none of the parties represent you, well, get out there and make them!

Tuition fees were the biggest issue on the doorsteps in 2001, It’s now our job to make top up fees and education, education education the biggest issue.

Kat Fletcher was addressing the NUS Coference. At the time of print this speech was available online at www.nusonline.co.uk

Waiting to term back time

W

By

Kerry-Lynne Doyle

ith the halcyon days of summer behind us the annual return to Cardiff and student life has suddenly fallen upon us again. After three months of working, relaxing, missing flatmates (or relishing the time away from them) it’s back to uni for some hard work and even harder playing.

For freshers it’s a scary and exciting time - a mixture of relishing the freedom and new experiences of university while missing home cooking and the

“reduced to a diet of baked beans for a month”

budget Cardiff has so much to offer that it’s easy to bag the odd bargain.

You can afford to treat yourself now and again without having to beg your bank for an overdraft extension and being reduced to a diet of baked beans

for a month. Cardiff is a city that seems to be designed for a student budget.

However, for all of the fun of finding bargains and general university life, I did look forward to summer with great anticipation. Essay deadlines, coursework and exams filled most students with a frustrating desire for the summer. This desire was fuelled even more by the cruel appearance of a heat wave for the exam period (just our bloody luck). Students were faced with the temptation of the sun and everyone seemed to be counting the days until their three months of freedom.

Yet two weeks into the holidays I found myself struck down with a longing for September. I missed nights in with my flatmates watching the TV in the kitchen and our nights out (the less said the better). I missed the daily routine of lectures and seeing my friends

to have a good whinge about evil lecturers, essay titles, and books we had to read. God forbid, I even missed the comforting bustle of students walking down the streets and rushing towards lectures and the Union. It’s sad but I really have looked forward to the beginning of term.

So while you may still be recovering from the hell that is unpacking (boxes, boxes and more bloody boxes) and scrapping with your flatmates within two hours of your emotional reunion, secretly you know that you’re glad to be back. You’re glad to see familiar faces; you’re glad about not having to work in a shitty job all week and you’re certainly glad to be back in a great city with a bit of freedom.

While I’m sure that in two months I’ll be writing an article whinging about deadlines, for now roll on the essays!

SDU Promotion

Page 8

September 1 2004

gairrhydd@cf.ac.uk

H

ave you ever said "yes" to people in a situation when you really meant to say "no?"

Have you ever floundered over an assignment to the point of wanting to put a bucket over your head?

Have you ever felt that colleagues seem to be able to do everything right and if they fell into dung they’d come up smelling wonderful?

Have you thought that making a presentation in front of others would bring back memories of what happened after you mixed too many drinks at a party?

Have you fancied learning Sign Language but felt that you’d be all fingers and thumbs?

If the answer to any of these is yes then read on.

It is universally recognised today that a degree is no longer sufficient

to obtain a suitable position following graduation. Employees respect the fact that students have taken active steps in building up their employability skills.

The Student Development Programme is a user-friendly range of personal development training modules.

The benefits of attending such programmes means you can gain skills and knowledge which will help you stand out from the rest of the crowd.

You’ll no longer be classed by some as "wet behind the ears". Stand up for your rights to demanding employers and colleagues who wind you up.

You can learn to manage your time so that getting up early to work on an assignment won’t net you a visit from men in white coats.

Perhaps you’d like to learn Welsh to sing lines of "Sospan Fach" in the bar on rugby international days and much, much more as well The courses are broken down into four main areas: 1. Soft Skills in Personal Development This includes aspects such as leadership, teamwork and problem solving, motivation, presentations and self-efficacy.

2. Information Technology This includes improving basic skills and other packages.

3. Language Skills British Sign Language and Basic Welsh 4. Health and Safety First aid packages, the chartered institute of environmental health & safety course and driver theory training.

Learn the important words and phrases in sign language

Pick and course and improve your potential On the right are a list of courses available from the SDU. If you are interested it couldn't be easier to sign up. Just look at the modules on offer and complete the sign up form from the Student Development Unit, floor 3 of the Students’ Union building. There is a £20.00 enrolment cheque, which is required, but this is only cashed if you do not attend the course. Apart from that, the vast majority of courses are free.

For further details please contact John Steele, Training & Development Co-ordinator at steeleJ@cf.ac.uk.

Gain the skills to be able to make a confident presentation

■ Being an effective representative ■ Speaking and presentation skills ■ Advanced public speaking ■ Listening and awareness skills ■ Teamworking skills ■ Problem solving and decisions making ■ Basic Welsh ■ Basic IT skills ■ Advanced IT skills ■ Creating and maintaining websites ■ Desktop publishing ■ Note taking and dictation ■ Negotiation skills ■ Time management ■ Application and interview skills plus psychometric tests

-

Stress Less Stay assertive, be assertive Basic sign language Motivate!

Managing projects Leadership skills Advanced leadership skills Successful networking Meditation First aid Introduction to business Driver Theory CD ROMS Customer service excellence Coaching skills Facilitation of learning STEPS to excellence for personal success - CIEH foundation certificate in health and safety

Student feedback on the SDU THE FOLLOWING comments have been received from students who have used the Student Development Unit.

"I found the Psychometric course very beneficial. It gave me an insight into various interview formats. More importantly, it boosted my confidence for Psychometric tests in the future by providing practical examples of how to deal with them. I know that the information the course provided me with will be a help in finding future employment and I strongly recommend the course to fellow students."

"SDU courses are well structured and all material is presented in a friendly manner. They are especially of great help if your course doesn't allow you to demonstrate particular skills necessary for the world of work. Help and

encouragement is always at hand if you're having difficulties, which is great for those who find it hard to get started on seemingly gloomy projects.

You can do no harm by enhancing your CV with the welcoming, informative, certificate-bearing sessions."

"FIRST AID: This First Aid class was a bit different from other classes I have attended. The instructor explained why were were carrying out certain manouvers in an interesting and detailed manner, so that we were able to think logically and fully appreciate what we were doing. I now feel that I could face an emergency calmly and would be able to think quickly and appropriately what to do. The class was really interesting and beneficial and I would recommend it to anyone. Also, the qualification is valid for the next three years.”

"S.T.E.P.S: I really enjoyed the course and it has helped me to see the world in a much more positive and optimistic way. I found that the course helped me to develop new skills concerning thinking positively and understanding myself and others in a way I had never thought of before. I'm so glad I attended the course as my self-confidence has vastly improved, I now have high self-esteem and I am much happier now. Life is generally easier than it used to be and I find myself enjoying experiences that in the past I would have avoided.”.

"Was just emailing you to say a big thank you for the STEPS course. I thought it was brilliant. The tapes are great and I'm feeling a lot more able and positive".

SDU helps you develop your potential and have fun as well

Letters

September 1 2004

Page 9

grletters@cf.ac.uk

It’s sports related, but not as we know it Dear gair rhydd, Having played football for my school’s first team throughout sixth form, I’m keen to start playing at University. I consider myself to be pretty good so don’t think that I’ll have too much trouble making it through any kind of selection process.

However, although I think that I’m a decent enough player to get into the team, I’m not too sure that I’ll be able to live up to the reputation football players at uni seem to have. I don’t like to drink because I’m a total lightweight and find myself feeling tipsy after a pint. I’m not too good at being a player with girls either as I’d prefer to find a good girlfriend than sleep with loads of different people. I’ve also heard that the initiation ceremonies are really crazy and the second and third years make you do really stupid things like eat dirt and drink shots until you spew up. It’s because of this that I’m reconsidering trying out for the team as I don’t want to end up looking like a loser when I won’t, or can’t do loads of these things. Is there any way that I can get out of doing all this stuff or it is the done thing to take part. I really do want to join a team because I love playing football, but I’m actually really concerned that my lack of interest in girls and beer will stop me from taking part in the sport I love.

utation for being a total player. Bed at least one woman a week and completely detach yourself from any emotional ties with them and that should do it. It is after all this that you need to display some kind of talent on the pitch.

Does this signal the end of a long reigning feud? By god I hope so Dear gair rhydd, I’m sure I speak on behalf of many gair rhydd readers when I plead with the Letters Page not to allow it to become a battle field for sporting related jibes this year. Whilst it was funny to begin with, the constant fighting between female sports players and the gair rhydd sports editors became somewhat tiresome over the last few issues. I’m sure that Cardiff students can put their Letters Page to better use and find more important issues to write about.

I can sympathise with both sides on this issue; the gair rhydd staff quite clearly have to include items that are interesting to most students, yet I also believe that they also have a responsibility to raise the profile of more minority sports. I hope that Thom Airs and John Stanton the new sports editors can balance this successfully and ensure that the Letters Page need not be filled with criticisms of the content of their section.

Clare, Second Year Chemistry.

The gair rhydd letters page Another year, another Letters Page. Well not exactly. Since we left you last year we’ve evolved somewhat.

Most importantly we’ve added a new column that will become a regular feature of the section. It will include a Guardian-esque corrections and clarifications column to put our writers, editors and proof readers to the test. If you spot any mistakes be sure to let us know; it is only from your feedback that we can continue to improve the quality of the newspaper. The column will also include weekly text votes and display some of your more worthy messages as we recognise it’s a hell of a lot easier to send us a text than write a whole email. So if you reckon you can fit everything you want to say in 180 characters, we will be delighted to hear from you.

On a serious note, please remember that this page is included because it gives you a chance to air whatever views you may have. Last year many letters sparked off a great deal of controversy but whether we agreed with their views or not, it proves that students of today can be pro-active and, despite criticisms, have a lot to say about important issues. So stop reading this and start thinking about all the lovely things you want to say to us. Letters Desk looks forward to hearing from you.

Perri

The LGBT should use criticism positively Dear gair rhydd, I wasn’t aware of the controversy surrounding the running of the LGBT society until I read the letters in the last few issues of gair rhydd.

Although the issues do not effect me directly as I am neither a gay, bisexual or transexual student, I am glad that the problems were raised because I think that the LGBT is an extremely important society within the University.

I believe that a society cannot be run effectively if the members are as dissatisfied. Although the feedback was given rather crudely in a public attack on previous committee members personal lives, I hope that it will be used positively to ensure the society provides a better service this year. If anything, I hope that the new committee sees the silver lining of this incident and uses it to i’s favour.

Michael, Fresher-to-be.

Unfortunately Michael, becoming a football player does involves more than just being good at football.

Initially you have to take part in embarrassing but crucial initiations which involve becoming a bitch boy to the more superior second and third years. From then on you have to balance your time between drinking vast quantities of alcohol and displaying typical footballer behaviour, working hard to build up a rep-

A perfect letter to end the feud between sports monkeys and their not-so-adoring public. Having spoken at length to Mr. Airs and Mr. Stanton, they assure me that they fully intend to cover a wide variety of sports this year as well as keeping gair rhydd Sport interesting and engaging for their readers. A fantatsic example of this is this editions back page feature which covers the antics of Cardiff University’s Mountain Biking Team.

Dear gair rhydd, I don’t know if you’ve noticed but the Arts and Social Sciences (ASS) Library is a huge problem for a lot of students. For example the last piece of coursework I had to do took me away from the joys of the Aberconway library and forced me to explore the perils of the ASS library. After ages trying to find the section I wanted I soon realised that I was to spend most of the remaining day there. The books I wanted were either at the bottom, or the top of the shelves.

If you have ever had to bend over between the rows, you’ll understand. I’m just an average size 12

but it was like something out of the Krypton factor trying to reach the bottom shelves. I ended up actually lying on the floor to get to the books, and then I couldn’t get up! However, the worst was to come. Being 5’ 6" is okay in normal life but in the ASS library it’s impossible to reach the top shelves. Since there was no one to help me reach I, stupidly, attempted to climb the shelves to reach the books. Just as my fingers touched the desired article a whole torrent of books cascaded on top of me! I thought I was going to be trapped forever under pages of science vs. religion debates but luckily a friendly chappy came along and rescued me. Now my experience maybe wasn’t as bad as it could have been. What if I was taller, shorter, fatter, or had really massive boobs that knocked everything off the shelve? It

Dear gair rhydd, While George W. Bush likes to boast about the supposed improvements he has made to our national security, the fact remains that he has done very little to protect us. He focuses energy on the wrong targets and continues to ignore terrorist threats in countries like Saudi Arabia. Bush has no plan to stop terrorism at the root and has spent so much on his tax cuts for the wealthiest Americans that he cannot afford to properly protect our points of entry. He has also demoralized our first responders by cutting their pay and benefits while shutting firehouses down across the country and opening them in Iraq. Every day, it is becoming clearer that Bush’s weak plan for fighting terrorism is the wrong choice for the US.

Second Year Marine Biology.

Anon.

The decision to publish the scathing letter criticising the running of the LGBT was not taken lightly and as anticipated, it became a controversial topic: Letters Desk received a massive response from Cardiff students who both supported and disregarded the content of this letter. In raising these issues, it was hoped by all at gair rhydd that a positive outcome would come from it.

letter of the week The library sucks if you’re a small fat girl with huge breasts

Does this look like the bloody political section?

would be a complete nightmare.

So unless you are Inspector Gadget the ASS library is a hindrance in our learning ability.

How does anyone expect us to get a degree when we’re stuck beneath a pile of books?

Third Year Economics It took letters desk a while to realise that there isn’t actually an Ass Library full of tastful nude buttocks, but it is in fact the Arts and Social Sciences library. Yes, I know there’s a description in the letter but, lets face it, a large ass won’t help things either. In fact the ASS library, one could argue, is secretly trying to make us conform to the ideal that society expects of us. People should not be made to have breast reductions or watch Jade Goody workout videos if they just want a book.

In this age of apparent ‘student political apathy’ it’s refreshing that somebody wants to air their political views. But if you feel strongly about something then why not take some form of action and help to make a difference. If you are thinking of writing a letter similar to this, why not write for our opinion section at gropinion@cf.ac.uk

text

corrections and clarifications

At gair rhydd towers we recognise that we don’t get things right 100 per cent of the time.

If you find any spelling mistakes or factual errors that have slipped through our beady eyes please let us know at the usual address. We will graciously accept our flaws by printing them in the next issue and recognising that we’re not perfect all the time.

prizes

As it’s the readers who contiribute the most to this page, we thought it only best that we give you a chance to pick your prize for Letter of the Week.

Well, kind of. Send us some suggestions and we’ll see what we can do with our almighty powers. So for one week only the winner of Letter of the Week will receive a load of left over stuff from our Music and Competition pages. We hope you enjoy.

Please email your letters to

grletters@cf.ac.uk We will endeavour to print all letters that are sent our way, but please remember that we do have space restrictions and some standards of decency.

Please also note that the views expressed in these letters are not necessarily the views of Letters Desk or gair rhydd.

07791165837

Oh my gawd...some of you really are that sad! You must really love gair rhydd if you’re texting us over the summer holidays. Even if you were drunk when you sent it, NO EXCUSE! You must have our number in your phone or something. Get some friends to text you loners!

And the lord sayeth: he who pilfers a sausage shall reveive mortal blows from his enemy. Ben, chapter 4 verse 2 Im in hospital, think ive poisoned myself. Used a daffodil bulb in a cheese sandwich instead of an onion. Don’t worry ill be out in the spring!

is it just me who wants to get back to uni? fuck summer, fuck the working all day all night to pay off the overdraft. bring on come play, beer, girls and afternoon lectures!

II will harvest my own eggs, and then at a later date, they will make little clones of me

Taf-Od

Tud 10

Medi 1 2004

grtafod@cf.ac.uk

Croeso I Caerdydd, Croeso ir Undeb a Croeso I Cyfle.

Gan Gary Rees Llywydd Undeb Prifysgol Caerdydd 2004/05

M

ae bleser ganddo I dechrau trwy rhoi fy llongyfyrchiadau I bob myfyrwr newydd am enill y cyfle I astudio yma yn Caerdydd ac felly yn un o Prif-ysgolion gorau Prydain.

Mae disgwyl gen I eich fod wrth darllen hwn yn deall yr iaith Gymraeg ac yn fwy na thebyg yrydych yn siarad yr iaith.

Fel llywydd gyntaf Undeb myfyrwyr Prifysgol Caerdydd am saith mlynedd gydar gallu I siarad Gymraeg y mae’n rhoi mi hyd-yn-oed fwy o bleser I gwybod pob blwyddyn y mae mwy o myfyrwyr yn dod ir prifysgol sydd ar dawn ar cyfle I gadw’r iaith yn fyw yma yn y Prifysgol ar dins eu hun.

Hoffen dechrau trwy dweud gair am fy tim; Y pwyllgor gweithedrol.

Yrydym wedi gael ein etholi gan y fyfyrwyr er mwyn eich cynrychioli am y flwyddyn.

Y mae yna wyth swyddog sabythol sydd yn weithwyr cyflogedig llawn amser sydd ar cyfrifoldeb llawn amser sydd ar cyfrifoldeb am bolisiau

a strategaeth yr undeb a’i gwmni. Yn ogystal a hyn y mae yna tair a ddeg swyddogion ansabathol sydd yn fyfyrwyr llawn amser sydd wedi eu etholi I cymorthwyo gwaith y swyddogion sabathol a rhedeg ymgyrchoedd.

Nawr yr ydych wedi darllen bach am yr Undeb hoffen rhoi Croeso i chi ddod ac ymuno yn yr awryw o gweithgareddau sydd ar gael yn yr undeb.

Yrydych yn siwr o gael llond bol o’r holl wybodaeth sydd wedi cael ei anfon I chi ar ddechrau y tymor a hyd yn oed cyn eich bod wedi cyraedd Caerdydd.

Ond allai rhoi darn o gyngor I chi; Cymerwch amser allan I darllen hon ac yn fwy pwysig darllenwch y Canllaw Unigryw a fyddwch wedi derbyn trwy y post, y mae hon yn llawn o wybodaeth a fydd o defnydd yn eich wythnosau cyntaf yma.

Gyda’r gwybodaeth hon byddwch yn siwr I taflu eich hun mewn I gymaint o gyfleuoedd a phosib. Pob lwc I pob un ohono chi ac yn pwysicach wnewch yn siwr eich bod yn cael hwyl.

REES: Llywydd dwyieithog ar gyfer Undeb dwyieithog

Interview

September 1 2004

Page 11

grnews@cardiff.ac.uk

Have I got Huws for you Jonathan Astle meets ten o’clock news anchorman Huw Edwards to discuss Welsh culture, life as a Cardiff student and an exceptionallly large tie collection

T

here are often preconceptions of journalism being a cut-throat world. Ultracompetitive hacks will stab each other in the back if it means getting that exclusive interview. But if there was ever a man to turn around these preconceived ideas then Huw Edwards is surely he.

For a man who is arguably one of the most well-known broadcasters in Britain he is surprisingly modest and runs a nice line is self-deprecating humour without ever losing the gravity of an man who anchors BBC1’s flagship news programme.

But perhaps this is natural for a man who passed through the corridors of Cardiff Univeristy on his way to the top. Proving there is hope for all of us at gair rhydd, Edwards used to write music reviews for the paper although he claims he was never seriously involved in student journalism.

When gair rhydd catches up with the anchorman he has returned to his place of study to give the Lord Heycock Memorial Lecture.

Edwards is clearly keen to have been invited to give the lecture as he describes the Lord as “a great Welsh educationalist”.

He continues: “What he [Lord Heycock] said was that if you’ve got a good Welsh education you can go anywhere. It’s part of being comfortable with your identity.”

Given that he has referred to Wales twice in one answer and the fact he hails from Swansea I ask him if he is keen to promote Wales and Welsh culture?

“I think a lot of Welsh school children lack confidence,” he replies.

“But it’s important to remember that the days are long gone when people turned up in London and felt they had to pretend to be English.

“I remember when I had one of my first voice-tests for broadcast the guy told me ‘Huw, I think you have a really great voice for broadcasting but you’ll have to drop the Welsh accent’. It’s not like that any more thank God.” As a student Edwards obtained a Masters in Medieval French while at Cardiff in 1983. Seeing as that was over twenty years ago Cardiff has changed a lot since he was here as a student.

“Cardiff University has gone from being well-respected but not very well-known to being a world-class university,” he says.

“In the eighties Cardiff was quite grim and dowdy but now it’s a bloody great student city.”

Having caught the journalism bug after doing some unpaid work at Swansea Sound, Edwards tried to get

“Outside broadcast on that scale gives you such a buzz”

on the Broadcast Journalism Postgraduate Diploma at the Journalism School but failed so went for a BBC trainee scheme instead.

After getting his foot in the journalistic door his rise through the institution was nothing short of meteoric, landing first the job of political correspondent at 26 before asceding up to become the main BBC news anchorman and presenting the ten o’clock news when he was 41.

For several years now Edwards has been the main face of BBC news, but I suggest that it must be difficult to constantly having to be seen to be objective?

“Not really. Outsiders often find it difficult to grasp but if it is a culture you are constantly working in then it becomes second nature. That’s not to say you don’t have to think about it all the time.

“I was told ‘you have a great voice for broadcasting’ but to drop the Welsh accent” Edwards on his first voice test

“After the Hutton Inquiry there was a huge amount of attention on the BBC. Lots of people in BBC News saw that as a big opportunity to send a strong signal that we would report this story just the same as any other. We could be seen to be impartial, even about our own organisation.”

Critics of the BBC, though, claim that BBC News has become more tabloid. How does he respond to those accusations?

“I don’t think there’s any evidence of ‘dumbing down’ at all,” he says.

“The newspapers which make these accusations are so often filled with utter crap; I don’t know how they can do that.

“Of course we do respond to our audience’s needs and these are quite different for the ten o’clock and the six o’clock. The six o’clock might try to reach out to a family audience but that’s not dumbing down.”

If the BBC is such a good journal-

EDWARDS: Anchorman

istic organisation, who does he think has the best job in broadcasting?

“David Dimbleby. I’m hoping for some of the crumbs that are thrown off his table. I really enjoy doing the big live events; things like the D-Day anniversary. Outside broadcast on that scale gives you such a buzz.”

There can’t be much Edwards hasn’t achieved in his career but when I put this to him he responds by saying he’d “love to do an election night’. Seeing as an general election looks likely next year there’s a distinct possibility he may get his wish.

To wrap up I ask what his greatest extravagance out of his huge BBC salary is. After laughing “I wish” to the notion he receives shedloads of money for a job that essentially involves reading an autocue while trying to keep a straight face he replies: “Ties. I’ve got about three or four hundred. You’ve got to look your best – people expect it.”

Media

Page 12

September 1 2004

grmedia@cf.ac.uk

Three is the magic number Meet the media moguls of your University...

By Bec Storey Media Editor

C

ardiff University has one of the best selections of student media available. gair rhydd and Xpress Radio have been rewarded with national accolades, thereby cementing its prestigious reputation.

Gary Andrews Media Officer Meet Gary, a Cardiff University Journalist graduate who just couldn’t bear to leave us, so became our Media Officer.

For the next year Gary will be the boss of all things media and the guy you need to hunt down if something goes wrong.

Student media offers fantastic experience and welcomes any student wanting to get involved. As this year gets underway, take some time to meet the newly-elected gentlemen in charge of your student media. media?

The best thing has to be the buzz around putting a paper together or working on a story; because of the nature of gair rhydd there’s always something different going on. The worst aspect is the long hours, but in a perverse way I enjoy working longer hours if it means the paper looks just that little bit better.

What do you hope to do after you finish the year?

I’ll probably do a postgraduate diploma in Where are you from? journalism here at I’m from a small Cardiff, unless village in Devon, somebody wants to near Exeter, offer me a high although my paid job in the family has got media industry. I’d very strong Welsh love to work for roots. Can’t speak Radio 4’s today a word of the programme or language sadly.

Channel 4 News. I’d be quite partial to What were your commentating on Formula favorite subjects at One. school?

I liked English GARY: Media Officer because of all the story writing What have you learnt after being involved and found History really involved in student media?

I’ve got so much out of my time interesting. At A-level I took all those media related subjects you’d expect. with Xpress Radio and gair rhydd.

And re-reading this I sound like a I’ve loved it so much that I’m now in really dull man. Sorry. If it’s any charge of the damn things. It has consolation I’m boring myself as I helped focus me on where I want to be going with my life and has given me write. invaluable experience for getting a foot in the media door.

Why Cardiff University?

It was a buzz around the city.

Coming from a small village, I didn’t How would new students go about really want to go to a big city and getting involved?

The best way is to sign up at the Cardiff’s got a nice friendly feel to it.

Plus the course seemed exactly Freshers’ Fair on September 30th and then come along to the welcome tailored to what I wanted to do. meetings, this will give you a good How did you get involved with general idea of how it runs. gair rhydd meetings are on Monday student media?

By accident. I had every intention at 1.15pm and Quench is Monday at of getting involved with gair rhydd in 5.15pm, both are on the top floor of my first year, but ended up joining the union. Feel free to drop by - you Xpress Radio. Midway through my can get involved as little or as much as second year I started to write for the you like. paper. I became media editor, which culminated with a bunch of people Why would you encourage new electing me as Media Officer. So I’ve students to get involved with lived, breathed and sweated student student media?

Because it’s almost worth a degree media over the last few years. in itself! If you’re even remotely considering a career in the media then Do you have any other hobbies?

I’ve done stuff with the film you’d be daft not to get involved.

There are sections for those who society. I play squash on a regular basis and go to the gym. Weekends are are really interested in the marketing spent watching Exeter City. I’m behind the media, the technical side or running in the Great West Run in May sub-editing. We have an amazing social scene and a sense of to raise money for the club. community. It’s a great opportunity to What’s the best/worst thing meet like-minded and diverse people. about being involved in student

James Anthony Quench Editor Quench is Cardiff Uni’s student magazine, which premiered last year and has gone from strength to strength. Valleys boy James is this year’s editor.

What are you studying at Cardiff?

Surprisingly enough, I’m doing Journalism, Film & Broadcasting...

I’m also on the JOMEC staff-student panel.

Why Cardiff University?

It was my only choice. I’m from South Wales, and there’s no nicer place than the ‘Diff when the sun is shining.

How did you get involved with student media?

Magazine journalism is my ultimate goal - it’s such a competitive industry, and any work experience you can get is vital. That’s not the only reason though - I’m fascinated by the media, and its effect on people.

Tom Wellingham Xpress Radio Station Manager Tom has just taken over one of the most successful student radio stations in the country.

It can be heard live in the student’s union and watch out for when it hits the FM waves.

What are you studying at Cardiff University?

Allegedly I’m studying B u s i n e s s Administration, i’m just about to start my third year.

What have you done for Xpress Radio/Gair Rhydd/Quench during your time at Cardiff?

I used to write and edit One Trick Pony in Quench, and I was possibly one of the most controversial Letters editor gair rhydd has ever had, although that was a persona, rather than the real me. I’m hoping to present a specialist drum ‘n’ bass programme on Xpress Radio this year.

Do you have any other hobbies?

I’m a proper musical trainspotter.

Flavour of this month is Midwestern US ‘trueschool’ hip hop. I DJ drum n bass in my spare time, and I’ve been lucky enough to DJ with Goldie, and played support on the first date of Roni Size & Tali’s UK tour. I’ve also got a healthy interest in body modification. And beer.

What do you hope to do after you graduate?

DJ, if we’re talking pie-in-the-sky dreams! I plan to emigrate, and live in Canada or Japan. My ideal job is staff writer for Vice magazine; failing that, i dunno - fifth member of Dirty Sanchez?

house music show Out of Sight for the last two years. I was also the head of specialist music last year so if it was on air after 7pm it was my fault.

Do you have any other hobbies?

I’m heavily into music, unsurprisingly, so my main hobby would have to be DJing, that’s certainly where my student loans have been going! I also love going record shopping.

Finally, I’m also a self confessed Technophile, I love gadgets, especially if they make noise!

What’s the best/worst thing about being involved in s t u d e n t media?

The best thing about Why Cardiff being involved University? in Xpress Radio It’s close to home, is the satisfaction but at the same time I’m you get from doing at university abroad! Kick a good show and the ass nightlife, good looking chance you have to city, the main reason being educate people in forms Xpress Radio is one of the best TOM: student radio stations in the Station Manager of music they may not usually come into country. Oh yeah, the business contact with. Alongside this is the school is pretty good as well. feeling of helping people to produce How did you get involved with something they didn’t think they could, and watching them develop, from the student media?

I walked up to the Xpress studios on first time they sit behind the my very first day and told them how it microphone trembling, to presenting was gonna be, I haven’t looked back confidently and enjoying it. The worst thing is that everyone’s a critic, but if since. you don’t like what you hear, come on What have you done for Xpress and have a go yourself!

Radio during your time at Cardiff?

I presented Xpress Radio’s premier What do you hope to do after you graduate?

What have you learnt after being involved in student media?

Too much to say - I don’t regret one moment, because it’s been a priceless learning experience.

How would new students go about getting involved?

Come up to the office for a shufty, come to the meetings, or email us. It’s a great experience, valuable CV material and you’ll meet new people, have a laugh, and discover other (sometimes bizarre) opportunities that you would never associate with a stereotypical view of "student media".

JIM: Quench Editor

Work in Radio or the music industry, set up a record label, open a promotions company, put on huge music events, run a successful club night, open a bar or all of the above!!

What would be your dream job?

Getting paid to listen to new music all day long in an office overlooking a palm-fringed beach somewhere with my decks set up on the desk, whilst good looking girls dance around singing “Tom is the king, Tom is the king!”

What have you learnt after being involved in student media?

It’s important not to take yourself too seriously - don’t be a primadonna, it probably won’t get you anywhere.

Always try to make new friends and don’t take people at face value. Ask for help if you need it. It’s impossible to do a good radio show without preparation.

Have a laugh, otherwise you might cry.

How would new students go about getting involved in Xpress Radio?

Come and see us at our Freshers’ Fair stall - it’ll be the big shiny one.

Why would you encourage new students to get involved with student media?

If they don’t, we’ll send the Xpress Boys round, to break some bones. seriously, it’ll be the best decision you make: we know how to have fun, everyone is up for a laugh, and I personally guarantee that getting involved will be 62% more fun than not getting involved.

Jobs & Money

Page 16

September 1 2004

grjobs@cf.ac.uk

Show me the money

W

hen you arrive at university chances are the last thing on our mind is organising your finances; there’s simply too much to do and take in.

Once the alcoholic haze of the first few weeks has lifted, though, reality tends to kick in, generally the first time you really take a good look at your bank account and realise how much money you’ve been spending and how much you still need to spend on the essentials.

With a loan in the bank it may seem tempting to spend like there’s no tomorrow. Organising your finances isn’t an easy thing to do but with gair rhydd’s handy tips hopefully your loan cheque should stretch that little bit further.

1. Don’t spend all your load at once Once your first loan cheque goes through, your bank balance is likely to look healthier than it’s ever done – but don’t take this as a licence to buy all those accessories you’ve always wanted. You’ll be surprised how quickly you can spend your loan.

Sure, it’s nice to treat yourself from time to time, but you don’t want to be doing this at the expense of not eating for your last three months.

News in brief

2. Don’t go mad in Freshers Week

Graduate mortgage launched

Contrary to what people tell you, Freshers Week is not a seven-day, 24hour bender. Although this is one of the few times you’ll have a chance to go out with a large bank balance and no 9 o’clock lectures the next morning, it’s very easy to blow a large proportion of your loan in the first week. By all means enjoy yourself, but don’t leave yourself so skint that you can’t enjoy big nights out during the rest of the year.

3. Take advantage of loyalty cards and other freebies Freshers Week means you’ll have copious amounts of free goodies thrust in your hand at every turn.

This isn’t altruism on the part of the companies throwing this stuff at you – they’ll be hoping to secure your custom for the next three years. More fool them. Grab whatever is thrown at you, but be careful not to sign your soul away for a free bag of crisps.

Once you’ve worked out where you regularly shop, drink and eat at, check if they offer some kind of savings card. It might mean more

JOBS: Getting part time work can help top up your finances plastic to carry around, but if it lets you save up for that extra pint at Fun Factory then it’s more than worth it.

4. Lunch burns a hole in your pocket

This may seem an odd piece of advice, but the cost of eating out really does add up over three years. It might seem easier to grab a sandwich from town but when you’ve got a full cupboard at your flat the savings really will add up.

5. Keep track of where it all goes

A piece of advice that’s easier said than done, but if you’re really keen on knowing where you’re throwing money away then try keeping a log of everything you spend over two or three weeks and you’ll soon work out where you can make savings. You’ll probably be surprised how much you spend on those little bits and pieces.

6. Get a job MONEY: It’s all too easy to keep spending your loan

Whilst your first year may be a time to enjoy yourself before knuckling down to pass your degree it also gives you enough time to earn extra

yd

d

Postcards from the Real World

7. Save future

for

the

Saving your cash may seem like the last thing on your mind at this time of your life, but, if you can spare a bit of your loan, take out a few hundred pounds from each loan cheque and stick it in a high interest savings account. That way you’re not tempted to splash out on a new DVD player, but can get access to these funds in an emergency, and all the time you’re earning from your loan. You’ll need to shop around if you’re interested in this, but as a rule of thumb building societies and internet banks such as Nationwide, Skipton and Egg, generally offer better rates than the well known high street names.

JOB FILE

ir

ga

Wish you were here!

Janine Jones

Student debt rises Tuition fees have been blamed for a ten-fold increase in student debt over the last two years.

A report from the Consumer Credit Counselling Service showed that the average debt from 18 to 20year olds seeking help have tripled from £2,615 to £8,090.

Cardiff graduates have bright futures Latest figures show that 88 per cent of Cardiff graduates whose destination was known have entered employment or postgraduate study.

In contrast just over four per cent reported they were unemployed six months after graduating.

r h

11 hour timetable to a dcasting graduate the shift from AS A JOURNALISM, Film and Broa more. difficult. I have no free time any 39-hour working week has been an extortionate amount to do a ive rece I . ures feat g emin rede e However this life has som there has been no real ty department (which I love) so relatively easy job in my universi a mature student with am I as ult been immensely diffic upheaval. Beginning work could have escalated to #21,000. young a seven grand debt, which has now sole responsibility. Plus I have a shared house, so the bills are my a exactnot ive rece I sure ing mak re tma On top of this I have a flat, nigh it has been an administrative and efits ben of ipt rece in was I daughter so no less.

Hallam. I didn’t realise how ly what I am entitled to, no more, Masters in filmmaking at Sheffield my ting star re I had befo ract cont t shor I am on a ce – I only received notification that get things done at such shor t noti ks. wee e thre in with flat a and y much pressure there would be to Dais now need to find a school for I and tion kend men wee to this not ing e, fund hom B secured AHR osit for a new ing bills here and try to find a dep ent. stud a I have to settle my (many) outstand as s year look forward to a relaxing two final moving all of our stuff. Then I can e.

Take my advice: never leav

cash on the side before your degree consumes you. Most places are looking for part time staff around October or, if you don’t fancy committing yourself every week, try the Union’s jobshop, which offers plenty of temporary work. Far better to get that cash in now rather than juggling a low-paid job and your dissertation in the third year as you struggle to pay your bills.

Britannia building society has launched a new form of mortgage specif ically for graduates. The Share to Buy loan enables up to four graduates to club together and borrow three times their salary each.

The idea is to allow young professionals, who normally wouldn’t be able to afford their own home, access to the first rung of the property ladder.

Britannia claims this service is addressing a need in the market and has made provision should one member of the group wish to move out. However consumer groups have warned graduates to make sure they are ready to commit to such a large financial undertaking before they purchase.

“A good rule of thumb is if you’ve made it to thirty-five and your job still requires you to wear a name tag, you’ve made a serious vocational error” Dennis Miller

Not enough training for staff Welsh workers don’t feel they are getting trained properly to do their jobs, a Department of Trade and Industry survey reports.

Two out of three workers think they would become more productive if their training was structured better although many admitted they didn’t always make the best of the training that was provided.

If you have any questions, comments or ideas for the jobs and money section please email us at grjobs@cf.ac.uk None of us actually have jobs, but we’ll do our best to answer your questions.

Health

September 1 2004

Page 17

grhealth@cf.ac.uk

Turning the lights down Why smoking in bars could soon be a thing of the past Health Editor

S

MOKING KILLS. These are the bold words which stare out at every smoker who picks up a packet of cigarettes, enabling them to make a choice which will ultimately damage their health.

Yet despite these obvious warnings it has only recently become apparent that passive smokers may also face a similar risk.

There has always been an underlying contradiction between choice and being a non-smoker. Those that make the decision not to inhibit their health through smoking are, time and again, restricted by the fact that smoking is allowed in public places.

But it seems that this irony has finally been supported by new research findings, which have set the ball rolling towards giving back non-smokers the freedom which should accompany their choice.

The British Medical Association recently found that at least 1,000 people die every year as a result of exposure to other people's tobacco smoke.

So, in light of these new findings you could ask why our own University union has not banned smoking in their bars yet?

With big chain Pizza Hut setting the trend for other big businesses to call a ban, pressure is now on Student Union bars to follow suit. As one of the biggest students unions in the country, Cardiff seems the obvious choice to be at the forefront of such a topical issue.

In light of their recent ethical stance in support of fair trade products, some

would claim that the argument seems even more valid.

However, it is no surprise that reservations are high, following Leeds University's huge drop in profits. In just 13 days the Union’s bars had witnessed a huge walk out and a plummet in sales of £26,000. It seems that such a loss was inevitable if other city bars were not to support one another in such a ban.

With the potential for such a great drop in trade Cardiff University Student’s Union Bars Manager, Keith Owen, admitted that a ban on smoking could only ever work if legislation was put in place. Just as Leeds Union found, if not all bars support a ban, smokers simply find somewhere else to go.

“The BMA found that 1,000 people die each year after exposure to other people’s tobacco smoke” A compromise has been struck for the time being, with the Taf having segregated smoking areas from September. Coupled with this will be a ban of smoking at the bar itself and the surrounding two metres. The no smoking zone will be enforced with

Photo: Dave Doyle

By Jess Boydell

LIGHTING DOWN: Could smoking soon be a thing of the past in Cardiff’s pubs and bars explicit signs and a refusal to be served if the rules are broken.

Speaking to union bar staff at the end of last term there seemed a definite feeling of support towards a trial, if not a total ban.

One staff member, who wishes to remain anonymous, blamed bad health on the smoky environment saying that she would often leave with a cough and sore throat.

A 2003 Mori poll found that seventy-six per cent of British people agree that waiters and waitresses in cafes and restaurants should be able to work in a smoke-free work environment.'

Apart from the obvious respiratory and dermatological problems associated with smoking, the British Medical Journal published findings that passive smokers are 36 times more likely to develop fatal lung cancers when they work for long-periods in smokey atmospheres'.

While Cardiff Union’s efforts to strike a balance will begin from September, this only finds middle ground in the argument to ban smoking in public places.

However, this is a compromise and not a solution to problem that lights up passions on both sides of the matchbox. It seems that until local or national government support a ban with legislation then businesses can not viably implement trial bans.

Smoking: the facts

■ roughly 12 million adults in the UK smoke regularly n 80 per of smokers take up the habit as a teenager ■ it’s estimated that half of regular cigareete smokers will be killed by their habit ■ the government currently spends #71 million on anti-smoking campaigns and measures to stop people smoking ■ 30 per cent of cancer-related deaths can be linked to smoking Facts courtesy of ASH www.ash.org.uk

Features

Page 18

September 1 2004

grfeatures@cardiff.ac.uk

A breath of fresher air

We’ve all heard the myths but without living the dream it’s impossible to predict how the first year will affect you. Emma Langley and James Anthony offer a guide to arriving at university based on their own first year experiences...

2. Flatmates I DIDN’T IMMEDIATELY think my flatmates were my ‘sort of people’ but we all became great friends.

There was a real mixture - from fitness fanatics to takeaway queens; from the exceptionally clean and tidy to the massive scruffbags who’d give Catweasel a run for his money. Then there was one guy who spent most of the first year calling me Kate on the basis that “I look like a Kate”. This wouldn’t have been so bad if there hadn’t been someone in our flat who was already called Kate.

You can choose your friends but, unless you know people down here already, you can’t choose you flatmates.

Y

ou’ll get drunk every night and it’s the maddest time you’ll ever have. Once arrived, you’ll never want to leave. Right? After cramming all your stuff into the teeny-tiny room, and having finally persuaded your parents to leave you’ll pick up this gair rhydd which has been cunningly left on all the desks along with the free Toblerone (NB: gair rhydd cannot accept responsibility for presence, or lack of, free confectionary). Last year it was packed full of all the useful yet clichéd advice such as why it was highly important that I didn’t sit in my room and mope but instead go out and make new friends.

Two years on this is the challenge: write about freshers week and avoid all the clichés. It’s a virtually impossible task but here goes...

In defence of siting in your room moping don’t underestimate how some quality time in your room can help. I stared at the ceiling for so long I eventually covered it with glow stars so I could stare at something new.

Posters of semi-naked celebrities are acceptable but please refrain from those cheesy “drunk roadsign” posters.

Plus if you steal a cone at any point during your university life you should be instantly expelled from sai university and banned from ever

attending one again. It’s the ultimate cliche and thus not big, hard, clever or funny. Actually I think ‘instant dismissal for road cone liberation’ is in the constitution.

Get acquainted with your sterile hospital-wall imitation room because it’s your home for the next year. As for ‘mad student stuff ’, about the maddest thing I did in fresher’s week was eat Marmite on toast sitting on Talybont lawn at four in the morning; not exactly verging on the insane.

Uni is one of the biggest learning experiences you will ever have. You’ll have to think on your feet and by the end of it you’ll probably find yourself a different, and hopefully better, person.

You might even ‘find yourself’. It’s an opportunity to become (semi) selfsufficient and learn what the big wide world outside is all about. Just don’t treat it like a free meal ticket to a job.

Respect and enjoy your time here, and realise how damn lucky you are to be at uni at all.

Still here? Good. The preachy bit is over, I promise. Freshers week, like the whole of university, will be uniquely tuned to your individual experiences.

We can lead you to the door, young Jedi, but you have to walk through on your own. See what I did there? I mixed two cultural references and got a new one. Good to see we’re not dispensing with the cliches fully.

1. Homesick of it all IT’S UNLIKELY you’ll be longing for your parent’s house; you’ve only just managed to escape it after all.

But at the same time there is a period of adjustment where you’re not sure exactly what it is that you do want.

If you are drastically unhappy there is Nightline. If you’re just marginally uncertain, then stick with it. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. It gets better and easier. Ring home as often as

you feel you need to and remember, sometimes new friends can be as good at listening as old ones (plus, you haven’t had the chance to bore each other yet). If you’ve never been to Cardiff before in your life I can assure you the gamble has paid off. Cardiff rocks. Even if you don’t think so in freshers week, you soon will. This place has a way of getting under your skin.

But in a good way.

Remember it’s only for a year and patience really is a virtue.

On the other hand you could meet your best mate who starts out as your flatmate. One of the great things about uni is that it really does take all sorts, and you’ll probably find a wide selection of people with broader minds than you did back home. It’s also good to ring the changes. There are people who stay with their flatmates all through their course secretly wishing that they didn’t.

Be honest but courteous, and ask if you find someone you’d like to move in with next year, making it clear that you don’t mind if they say no. But don’t rush into it. Some arrangements work out, some don’t. It’s a good plan to have a backup plan or get-out clause.

It could ALWAYS be worse

There’s a very simple solution to this.

It is called a rota and the smart ones amongst you (which is probably most of you - you’ve been smart enough to choose this university after all) should become very familiar with Mr. Rota and his ways.

Providing everyone sticks to it, it will solve all manner of petty arguments, because everybody knows their responsibilities. There will be people who try and duck out of it, but if you shave their eyebrows off every time they fall asleep anywhere communal, then they will soon learn to respect communal areas.

Or you just may never see them again.

Either way, everyone’s a winner.

Bottom line is, just because you’re a bunch of young people away from home for the first time, doesn’t mean you have to live like slobs because mummy’s not here to pick up after you. Have some goddamn respect for yourselves.

3. The notorious kitchen sink IT WASN’T THE washing up or the state of the flat that caused the most friction, it was the sink.

Blocked from day one without us putting anything down it, the sink was beyond plunging. Despite finding a scrawled note on someone’s wall obviously left by a previous student warning us about the sink the maintenance staff, in their reliably rude fashion, still blamed us for being typical students in classic ‘irresponsible young people today’ type tones.

Whenever we dared to complain when it was blocked was blocked we were told that they were getting someone from outside in. They never came.

4. So no one told you life was gonna be this way...

EVERYONE IS ON the super -friendly making-friends tip and it can get tiresome.

After you’ve had the same where are you from, what course are you doing, what halls do you live in conversation a billion times over you may not remember anyone’s name or origin or even whether you’ve spoken to them before or not.

I did meet that person who I spent the rest of the year trying to avoid. It happens. Then there’s the person who you really should of spoken to; one of the quiet ones in your seminar group who lives in the same house, who you sort of smile at everyday in one of those we know each other but we don’t smiles. Make the effort - what have you

got to lose?

Let us not forget all the people who you meet in freshers week and remember vaguely when you walk past them, continuing to say hi to them in that, yeah, I meet you at that party way. By the end of the year both parties can reach the mutual we don’t have to pretend we know each other because it’s awkward and we have nothing to talk about and nothing in common apart from that one night in freshers week stage. Add to this the we slept together fiasco, and the potential for embarrassment is awesome.

Still, you live and learn, eh? Half of you reading this going ‘yeah right’ will be smirking on the other side of your face come this time next year.

Features

September 1 2004

Page 19

grfeatures@cardiff.ac.uk

5.

Neighbours, everybody needs good neighbours YOU THINK you get to know everyone pretty well in halls, especially when it’s a mini village like Talybont, or ‘The Bont’ as you will affectionally come to know it.

You’ll see everyone in the pub, the launderette, the shop, and in their PJs when somebody sets the fire alarm off and your whole house has to stand outside freezing their asses off. This is a sure-fire way to piss off the entire house.

By the end of the year our flat was surrounded by other flats that we managed to seriously annoy or seriously wanted to avoid. The psycho Spanish guy above us who thought it was amusing to lean out of his window with a broom in order to try and smash our window being a good example.

By the middle of fresher’s week I felt that I was having a good time meeting

new people and doing all that fresher stuff. The guys on the floor below us had an open house-party and, as a flat of six girls, getting to know the guys directly below us was the opportunity to get some badly needed male friends.

Unfortunately, less than a term later, three of our flat got a bit drunk and invited themselves into the guys flat after banging on the door shouting about how much they needed men.

They then proceeded to fanatically clean the guys kitchen and throw away anything dirty. The cleaning evidently

wasn’t appreciated and they were promptly evicted. The rest of the year was spent having to avoid that flat.

As it turned out, I really didn’t know my neighbors that well anyway. In one of those unplanned drunken nights in I was cheerily shouting things out of the window to pissed passers-by. Along came a not-particularly-drunk, but cocky, bloke who we challenged to a flashing competition. Needless to say it wasn’t my face that he first saw. Then to my surprise he started shouting my name. On peering through my beer goggles I realised it was someone from my school. I had absolutely no idea that he was at the same uni as me, let alone in the same house. It’s a small world after all.

Also, don’t be put off if you miss out on the Halls experience; this gives you more of a reason to join clubs and societies and there’s lots of fun to be had in student houses. Get a mate with some decks and a mixer or, at the very least, a decent mp3 collection and the mighty Winamp on their computer and you’ve got yourself a house-party in the making. Just add friends and alcohol (Both are readily available for hire or purchase). Be warned though - you may have some unwanted crashers and, if the police get called due to public nuisance complaints, you didn’t hear anything from us and it wasn’t our idea.

7. Signing on the dotted line SOCIETIES, SPORTS and careers fairs - all are held in the great hall; all can be horrible, cramped and suffocating. To add insult to injury, it takes ages to find and then get remotely near the front of the stall you want.

You can join societies in order to meet new friends and people who share your interests but you may find that, with the with the odd exception, you won’t make it past the second meeting.

If you’re serious about sport, and you like being chained to somebody else in a pub who makes you match them drink-for-drink, frequently resulting in hospitalisation then the athletic union (AU) is the place for you.

On the other hand why not get involved in this very newspaper or Xpress Radio?

At the Freshers Fair you’ll be spoilt for choice.

6. What you can’t hear, can’t annoy you

Here’s where the sounds go in.

THIS ONE is old but oh, so very true. Residence hall walls, ceilings, and, for that matter, floors, are thin.

Very thin.

Useful tip: It may not look like it but sometimes in even the smallest of rooms, there is just enough space to wedge the mattress in between the bed and the desk.

8. Drunkn Munky stylee

Although you will still have to be stick insects to fit in there in the first place, at least you don’t feel like you are about to fall out / push the other out of the bed, and your flatmates and the flat below will appreciate what they don’t hear. On the other hand, they may be perverts and enjoy listening. Or maybe you are, and you like others to hear.

IN THE DAYS before they planned to make every drink at least £1.70, Metros ‘80p double & mixer’ on Wednesday nights was a pivotal moment in many first year lives.

Its one of those places where sweat drips from the ceiling to the bizarre mix of rock, metal, and cheese, and nobody cares. The result was unconsciousness, vomiting in the taxi, losing my room keys and throwing up bile for the next two days. I learnt my lesson.

You too can be part of the greatest society in this union

9. The dreaded ‘W’ word...

IF YOU ENJOY the work, then that’s all good. If not, oh well.

Remember, in your first year it doesn’t count. BUT, and this is a big ‘BUT’, do not let this lull you into a false sense of security.

Old habits die hard, and getting off on the wrong foot in the first year may result in getting into trouble in your later years.

However enjoy it while it lasts because, believe me, you will reminisce like old grannies discussing tea and public transport when you are in the second year about how your carefree days in the first year.

Oh, and another thing - re-sits both simultaneously suck and blow, if such a thing is physically possible. You will hate them. Vehemently.

Death by toast was the favoured option for students caught cheating

10. And Beyond Fresher’s Week...

MY FLATMATES are now ex-flatmates but, although I’ve chosen not to live with them for my third year, I do love them to bits, especially the one who no longer calls me Kate.

But, as for all those people who fall into the ‘no longer need to say hello to category’, I will always have good memories of meeting them. But you make your friends as you go along no matter how many years you’re at uni for.

I’ve met my best friends here through other means: my course, societies, other friends, embarrassing drinking games where you get to know all sorts of things about relative strangers. Your social circle does not start and end in freshers week. Freshers week was the beginning of a year in which I got to have a lot of fun and not care too much about anything. Do what you want to do and make the most of it.

Free Stuff

Page 20

September 1 2004

grcompetitions@cardiff.ac.uk

grab!

WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! Well here we are, Freshers’ week again! It seems to come round faster every year, or maybe I’m just getting old. Whatever you did with your summer, whether it be working full time (gulp) to clear that overdraft, swanning around Australia or some other exotic location (you lucky bastards) or simply lazing around and enjoying your daily fill of Diagnosis Murder and Quincy, I have some fabulous giveaways to welcome you back to your favourite university and cure that freshers week hangover (quite literally). To win, simply leave a note for me in the grcomps pigion hole, with your name, email address and answer(s) or email me at the above address. Good Luck!

Just H2O? NOW THIS is a competition for the super sporty among you.

Throughout my travels in PR land, I have come upon this miracle water, called Penta, the “water of champions”, or so I am told.

This ultra-purified, and more importantly, restructured drinking

SWIM: Top teams drink Penta

water, is scientifically proven to hydrate faster. I have read case study after case study of athletes who drink this new generation of water. From triatheletes to swim teams, they all that state they perform better in atheletic events, use less effort and feel less strain after the event because of the drink.

Research at Liverpool University confirms that Penta water does enable you to ‘perform better’ (take from that what you will, I aplogise now for my dirty mind). It seems that Penta’s claims of super hydration and improved athletic performance are not as far fetched as they may seem. One example is a crazy athlete who won a 26.2 mile race, drank two

bottles of Penta and felt so good he would have been happy to race again. (The thought makes me shiver).

The famous rugby team, the London Wasps, have won shitloads of trophies on the stuff and pop evangalist Sting swears by it, advertising the stuff while he cavorts and croons on stage; he states that no water hydrates like Penta.

Other celeb users include Mel C, and a shedload of oher rock stars. Penta are also proud to have supplied

the Big Brother house during the summer with their water in order to cool off Shell, Nadia, Stuart and the like from the many steamy conflicts in the house this year.

Apparently recovery wise, Penta is the business. Which led me to consider another form of recovery. I discussed this with the Director at Penta water UK and he confirmed it for me, Penta water does cure hangovers. Yay! Intrigued to know if it really works? To purchase, hit your local pharmacy, gym or health store to pick up a bottle or contact www.dealsforstudents.co.uk to get it cheap. If that fails, try www.teampenta.co.uk (you can also go here

Hangover Cure: Ingredients: 2 bottles of Penta water.

Method: Due to the waters super hydration, you can drink it down rapidly and easily with no sloshing or bloating which means you get very quickly rehydrated and get rid of headache and nausea fast. for cute little diagrams of how the water works, then again maybe I’ve had too much time on my hands lately) or you can call 0870 225 9438 during office hours (minimum order two cases). Or you could win a case here just by answering these super easy questions: Which famous Rugby team has won the most trophies on Penta water? Which pop evangalist swears by Penta?

Enter in the usual way.

There’s no place like Space... Just for the ladies.

ANYONE GO to Ibiza this summer? For those that are smiling and saying Yes, it was wonderful, I got so drunk, got a great tan, got off with the fittest man/woman etc.

I have the perfect thing to help you relive the blessed memories of your days on the Balearic isle.

I have got my grubby little mits on five copies of Space Ibiza double CD mixed by Dave Picconi, Which features massive summer anthems from Spektrum, Fraks, Psycho Radio, Steve Lawler, DJ Chus & David Penn, Armand Van Helden and Shapeshifter’s ‘Lola’s Theme’ and many more. The compilation also comes with a free DVD featuring huge Ibiza anthems and interviews with some of the island’s biggest DJs, such as Carl Cox and DJ Pippi.

All centred around one of Ibiza’s biggest instiutions: the must see, must feel, must do club that is Space.

Boasting two World’s Best Club accolades from the prestigious Dancestar Awards, Nice headgear love... not to mention an

amazing cosmopolitan, atmosphere where music is the one true answer to a life without conflict. All you pacifists can certainly get on down.

This multi-cultural atmosphere has in turn created a situation where all of the worlds top DJ talent want, to play there. Producing fantastic sounds and energy for clubbers all around. Even if you didn’t hit the clubs in Ibiza this summer due to a scarily pitiful cash situation (I feel your pain). Do not fret; simply put either disc into your stereo/DVD player, close your eyes, drink a few cocktails until the room starts to spin, get your mates to flash some lights around you and grind up against you a bit and hey presto, you’re in Space!

Well, not quite, but hey, it’s the best I can do.

Anyway to win a copy of the CD/DVD answer this super easy question: How many times has the Club Space been awarded the World’s Best club accolade at the prestigious Dancestar awards? Enter in the usual way.

I HAVE TO ADMIT, it is Johnny mania in my house.

Ever since his Keith Moon impression in Pirates of the Carribean us ladies have been hooked. Ohh, the black eyeliner and big gun. So especially for you, here’s a l’il picture of the high cheek boned wonder for you to stick up in your kitchens. I still can’t believe he’s 40 with children. That Vanessa Paradis is a lucky woman.

And the award goes to...

THIS WEEK I am going to award the women’s toilets in the Ernest Willows pub on City Road with the best toilets in Cardiff award.

The pub is very lovely, but the toilets are fit for royalty. They have a mock fountain in them for christ sake! And a big, red, plush sofa for when you want to

Model tests Rightguard deodrant

rest your feet from all that hardcore drinking, truly beautiful. I have been told that the men’s are very nice too. Maybe the braver ladies among you can check that out and let me know.

Check out the next edition, for my next grand award.

P.S. For those of you who have yet to pick up your prizes from last semester, hurry along soon! Your prizes are still patiently sitting in the gair rhydd office waiting for your love and affection.

Listings

Page 22

September 1 2004

grlistings@cf.ac.uk

TOP FOUR FRESHERS Eager to get your teeth into the juicy goodness of Cardiff’s smorgasbord of entertainment? Of course you are. Here to tell you how is Hannah Muddiman with the best of Cardiff’s September fun hand picked to help you start your academic year with a bang.

Welcome to the new and improved gair rhydd listings.

1 A

Freshers’ Week

t No. 1 it is the essential, the obligatory, the utterly downright incapacitating, ‘Students Union Freshers’ Week Piss-Up’ (not the official title but it tells you all you need to know).

The human body is not designed to enjoy the entirety of this full week of revelry but for those of you set on defying the laws of nature, the details are as follows (at time of going to press): Mon 27th Sept sees all union venues incorporated into the longrunning Solus night ‘Fun Factory’ with Radio 1’s Zane Lowe doing his thing in the Great Hall and resident

All over the union, every bloody day of the week.

Starts 27th September DJs running the show in Solus.

Tues 28th Sept offers an undignified but no doubt welcome ‘Traffic Light Party’ in Solus. Pick up a glow stick on the door (variously coloured to denote availability) and then take your chances within.

Wed 29th Sept brings us the first of the year’s weekly ‘Rubber Duck’ nights. Absolute cheese from start to finish. Make the most of this early outing before it’s overrun by sports teams in subsequent weeks.

Thurs 30th Sept heralds the inagural ‘Replay’, a night of 80s

and 90s musical nostalgia.

Check out ‘One Big Lash’ on Fri 1st Oct (possibly encompassing all union venues). Chart and R’n’B are the order of the day. Perfect either to wind up the week or kick off the weekend.

A long week of entertainment indeed and probably not to everyone’s tastes but for many the ultimate cure for those interminable enrollment blues. Consult union advertising for times, entry charges and the like.

Watch this space for details of the Union’s Freshers’ Ball set to take place on Sat 9th Oct.

3. Cars: Love them or loathe them

F

rom the 16th to the 19th of September we welcome the Wales Rally GB to Cardiff.

Unlike most other motor sports, rallying allows you to get up close to the action: the cars and the stars. For the fifth time in succession, Cardiff will host the event. Both the official start and the ceremonial finish will take place in Cardiff Bay. Wales Rally GB brings the grit, glamour and raw excitement of world-class championship rallying to the UK, pitting top national and international rally drivers aginst the rigours of the Welsh countryside, forestry and tracks. Skill and stami-

na are pushed to the limit on rugged forest tracks and diverse mountainous countryside over 19 enduring stages and four days in South, Mid and West Wales.

Highlights include the spectacular jump entry into Walter's Arena, and a brand new stage in Epynt. For further information and tickets see www.walesrallygb.com In complete contrast the 22nd of September will see Cardiff ’s city centre become a car free zone in the annual ‘European Car Free Day’. It’s a liberating experience to cross St. Mary’s Street without fearing for your life!

2. Mardi Gras Cooper’s Field 2nd September 2pm-9pm THE SIXTH Cardiff–Wales Lesbian and Gay Mardi Gras, the second largest free gay event in the UK! A celebration of diversity with over 30,000 participants in what has become one of Cardiff ’s cultural highlights. This event is not only great fun, it also forms an essential part of the city of Cardiff ’s determination to combat hate crime and promote equality.

For many people the jewel in the mardi gras tiara is the main stage and once again this will be the centrepiece of the day: 7 hours of non-stop music from 2pm presented by Red Dragon DJs and apparently (I use that word advisedly) well-known celebrities.

Past years have seen Liberty X and Lisa Scott Lee grace the main stage, who knows who’ll be there this year?

Saviour and King’s Cross are teaming up to host the dance tent, which will feature laser displays, stunning décor, projections and live visual displays.

The press release also urges me not to forget ‘Saviour stud puppies on the podiums and at her most outrageous, your hostess Ms Tina Sparkle.’ Wow. And if all that isn’t enough for you, check out the cabaret - what mardi gras would be complete without grease paint, lippy, high heels, feather boas and glitzy, flamboyant costumes?

I won’t upset you with talk of champagne, gormet food, free bar and all the extras you get in the ‘gold enclosure’ for the princely sum of £150- it would just be too upsetting.

4. Live and Kicking

C

ardiff has a peculiar relationship with live music. While it plays host to many big name bands making the effort to play a token Welsh gig it is not uncommon to find top quality acts playing to a half empty house, even at some of the more successful venues.

However there is no lack of talent plying their trade within Cardiff and a little effort to find out what’s happening at the smaller venues will be greatly rewarded.

The mighty Clwb Ifor Bach (aka The Welsh Club) regularly hosts live bands. One of their standout gigs should be acid jazz legends, James Taylor Quartet playing their familiar hammond organ groovers to the faithful on Thurs 23rd Sept.

Check out the Toucan Club and The Barfly as well for more alternative music from hip-hop to metal, funk to punk rock.

Opera and classical music fans are well catered for by St David’s Hall and The New Theatre. Also at St David’s Hall on Wed 22nd Sept, the 26 strong Soweto Gospel Choir will be dazzling audiences with their own brand of South African gospel and dance.

Cafe Jazz and The Riverbank Hotel are the places to go to see local musicians and touring bands swinging that thing they call jazz.

One to look out for is local jazz heroes The Heavy Quartet playing high energy jazz with a dash of ska and the odd Nirvana cover at The Riverbank Hotel on Fri 10th Sept.

Meanwhile our very own Students’ Union acknowledges the indie crowd and plays host to The Music on Tues 28th Sept and The Zutons on Sun 10th Oct. Go on and support live music why don’t you!

Gair Rhydd Problem Page

September 1 2004

The Phil Collins Photo Casebook WEEK ONE

Page 23

Dr. Matthew grproblempage@cardiff.ac.uk - because you’re smelly and I hate you.

Flimsy Walls = Flimsy Friendships Dear Matt

I'm a very vocal young lady with a very

Phil was out hunting in Switzerland, mainly for a McDonalds. His large offterrain vehicle gave him a fine vantage point for shooting deer.

Lostprophets’ frontman, Ian Watkins, spotted Phil from his tree top hideout and then AMBUSHED him, tossing his Big Mac into a passing stream.

Ian demanded that Phil played drums and produced their cover of “In the Air Tonight” for them. But Phil, meanwhile, was calling for aid...

Back in Britain, John Snow recieved a missed call, and quickly scrambled to his Apache. His good buddy Phil needed rescuing!

Continues next time...

voracious sexual appetite, from whence stems my problem... I'm about to take up residence in a house with several of my university comrades (some of which I've never lived with before).

At first glance you probably cannot see the horrific problem with which I'm about to find myself immersed in.

Student hardship (piecemeal LEA "loans" to blame) has meant we've had to skimp on accommodation; the internal partitions in our new residence are about as thick as paper. Vibrations and noise travel. Obviously, I do not want to alienate my flatmates, highlighting their sexual inadequacies by my frequent fornicatory sessions, yet I cannot suppress my sexual appetite, nor my screams

of ecstasy.

I'm at a loss with what to do. Surely there must be a simple solution enabling me to enjoy myself, and prevent my flatmates from audience to my "private" life?

Yours, a just-about third year.

Oh boy. Before we start, can someone tell me what the deal with Through the Keyhole is? Is it me, or is it the the most sinister programme on television?

Consider David Frost’s socks. Then consider his oddly muted, stunted speech and approach to sentence structures. I find it to be a harrowing experience, as if he is about to have an aneurysm, or a stroke with every word that...leaves....his...mouth. Is he about to meff out? Is his voice synthesised by a seventy year old man with a burnt lar-

ynx? WHY does it attract F-listed celebrities who we are going to have NO IDEA WHATSOEVER about? Is David Frost actually dead? Why are we supposed to be interested in why the owner of a house has seventeen parrots and a pot of soot which he draws on the walls with?

If students didn’t dick about with buying DVDs of things like Transformers, Boobah and Michael Moore films, then students would logically/inherently have more money. In fact I don’t even have a solution because you sound like a witch, a great big fat witch with a yellow face and brown fingernails and cellulite and no underwear and you probably gobble fishies out of ponds and things like that, you big child-besmirching hussy-faced penis-devouring bastard.

Matt

Saucepan Wee Causing Concern Dear Matt

starving for the last 3 weeks.

I hope this does not reach you too late but we have an urgent problem that we really need your help with before the summer. We

2 very pissed off 3rd year students (no pun intended)

have recently discovered a disturbing secret concerning a Cardiff University student.

Yesterday our landlord performed an inspection on our property and he enquired why our housemate was storing a yellow substance in saucepans in his room. As the housemate in question has been at home for a few weeks he asked us what the yellow substance was, to which we replied 'what the fuck?!' The contents have since been verified as urine by a drunken fool whose nose accidentally came into contact with the crusty containers. Do you think storing urine is normal behaviour?

The housemate has been away for a couple of weeks so it has obviously been fermenting and the landlord has asked us to dispose of it. We had been wondering where our saucepans were disappearing to and have been

A little over thirteen years ago, in a remote desert complex somewhere in Nevada, a small research team was last seen pissing into a hole surrounded by gun turrets and proximitytriggered bombs. Apparently a rich business man from Washington D.C was keen on developing a cure to the growing numbers of people who were experiencing yellow urine.

It was subsequently decided that the colonisation of forests and dodgy ventures into foreign lands were causing people to drink things other than water. Thusly a small grant would facilitate these chaps, who were given several thousand packets of crisps and seventeen thousand gallons of water and told to sit in the desert and watch episodes of Sesame Street, whilst periodically heaving bouts of clear urine into a specially designed container. The subsidiary team would then analyse the results of consuming this rarely consumed drink. These results were then processed by an elite team featuring several medical components and a

priest (who could apparently bless the by-product) back in Washington, where the shipments would arrive in large plastic containers (green) in a most inconspicuous manner.

The first Gulf War broke out; but it was pretty irrelevant.

Soon enough the potatoes that the team had inadvertently planted because one of them had brought some seedlings grew large and powerful, and even began to generate a democratic system; but this was also irrelevant.

The experiment in the desert was also largely pointless, but the men who went did suffer side effects of a high carbohydrate diet and one of them fell over and broke his ankle, which then turned septic and fell off.

I don’t know what happened after that, but it’s safe to say that your housemate’s cache of contraband urine would probably worth at least £3 on the International black markets, and that it’s a jolly good thing that it was discovered before the saucepans were irrevocably lost to their fetid contents.

Matt

Super-duper-handytips-concerningfreshers.

Freshers get a lot of stick.

This is unsurprising because for the most part, freshers are rubbish.

Sometimes freshers vomit lots, and sometimes they fall from great heights. At other points freshers get themselves wedged in small holes, like wheeliebins, and face the danger of drowning. Which is never good. To counter the initial follies that may well be incurred, I have devised a number of small and dynamic hints that will make freshers a little less rubbish and things like that.

- Keep your mouth shut when you chew. Your mum would waffle you for it, and no one likes to see your tongue anyway, you crackaddled street urchin.

- DON’T be everyone’s friend, and then never speak to them again. It’s fucking rude.

- MAKE a T-shirt, which says your AGE, your EXAM RESULTS, YOUR COURSE and your NAME. This will cut at least six hours from people asking you those minor details and you can concentrate on things like spitting competitions and "who can get the glass bottle to bounce off the telephone box into the bin and make a splash from the residual rain water?"

- Don’t play your music too loud, it is probably shit.

- Your parents are really very glad to have finally gotten rid of you. They spent your entire childhood planning the moment of your departure and thus you must not interrupt their new found sexlife/hobby/bank balance. Stop ringing them, it’s really ok. Everyone is just as pathetic and weak as you are.

Dr. Matthew’s Surgery Is your poo the wrong shade?: Call 0800-MCEITH Is your face falling off?! Call : 0800-MY-FACE-IS-FUCKED Are you being molested by a terrorist? Call: 0800-UKGOV Do you want help with your Garden? : 0800-DIMMOCK Has your house imploded?

Call: 0800-IT-WAS-ALL-ME

So I’m presuming that many of you are curling great-big-whopping turds out, at a rate of three a day and with a disturbing consistency. I’m probably implying that you are nervous about the year ahead, and have already suffered some form of drink-related folly. I’m also presuming that you’re reading the gair rhydd for the first time (which would be logical) and have per chance stumbled upon this aptly titled page. Only its had a bit of a funked-up makeover, and I am now posing as a doctor. So there we are. Welcome to Cardiff.

It happens. Therefore if you’re crying you write it in an email and send it to me. If you’re depressed, you do something similar but change the subject title and then write something about hernias, chip pan fires and cocaine instead, and if you’re just plain miserable, then fuck off back to your mummy, because I’ve heard it all before and could give more of a piss about one of those floaty seedling things which I can (infuriatingly,) never catch. So, if you’re shit, then send me an email about it, to the email address which I politely detailed North of this quite splendid box. Failing ALL this, (and you’ve tried Xanax), I insist that you phone Nightline, because they are actually nice people. You can reach their genuine, listening and confidential ears by telephoning: 029 2022 3993.

Five minute fun

Page 24

September 1 2004

grfiveminutefun@cardiff.ac.uk

The Big Quiz* *Any similarity between this and any other quiz (especially the one on Radio 2 with the same name) is purely coincidental. No legal wrangling will be entered into.

1. Grolsch is an excellent lager, but that is not being questioned. What I want to know is, what is the catchphrase spouted by the non-denominational Eurotrash on the the TV adver t? Is it: A: "Stop! It’s painful, and will almost cer tainly get wedged up there" B: "Schtop! This (something) is not ready!"

C: "Stop! Or my mom will shoot."

2. Monty Python’s Flying Circus. This starred an old man in rags introducing the show, in a variety of amusing situations. He always took ages to get to the camera, to finally say one word, and one alone.

3. Last year, gair rhydd got in trouble for overuse of a cer tain dir ty word. Was it: A: "WMDs" B: "Cunt" C: "lectures" 4.

A: B: C: D:

Belle and Sebastian is best known as: A weird old car toon, about a boy and his dog.

A whiny Indie band.

Both of the above.

None of the above.

5. University degrees are: A: A ver y wor thwhile investment, leading to future happiness, and a guaranteed high-paid job.

B: Something your parents make you do.

C: An utter fucking waste of time; I wanted to be a plumber.

D: All of the above.

6. Chlyamidia is: A: Something which you can catch from having unprotected sex.

B: Something I’m bound to get at least twice this year.

C: Something you can’t catch from animals. Here kitty kitty!

D: An island off the coast of Greece.

7. Which one of these is not a collective name for visually appealing wildfowl: A: A lovely pair of Tits.

B: A massive set of Boobies.

C: A stunning ‘pecker.

D: A nice Cock.

E: Phil Collins’ toupe fluff.

8. A PBJ is an American acronym (oh, look it up), for what?

A: President Bush’s Jockstrap B: Painful Blow Job C: Peanut Butter (&) Jelly

AnnSummers: 1.b; 2.a; 3.b; 4.a,b or c; 5.There is no correct answer for 5; 6. probably all of them; 7.e; 8.c

Q

What was it?

A: "It’s...”

B: "Coleslaw..."

C: "Mittens..."

Win a meal for two at The Dalchini, Fine Indian Cuisine Restaurant.

Two meals with rice (Excl. King Prawn, Mix Grill and Shashlik).

Open Sunday - Thursday 6pm - 1am Friday and Saturday 6pm - 2am 10 Mackintosh Place, 02920 481805

Lasting as long as a shag with any two members of [insert rival IMG football team of your choice here] It’s the competitions page... thing.

In lieu of Hot Laura, who is usually here taking care of you while you read this sitting on the toilet, or some other short venture where you’re terminally bored; I shall be leading you through the complete lack of sensation that is, Five Minute Facial.

This week’s crossword is easy, because then many people will enter, and I can feel godlike in my choice of who shall eat curry, and who shall go hungry.

In the event of a tie, please ensure you write your porn star name on your entry (you know, the one you get by taking your first pet’s name as your first name, and your mum’s maiden name as your surname). Funniest one wins, and it has to be real...

Yours, James Anthony

Name: _____________________________________________ Email: _____________________________________________ Porn star name: _____________________________________________ To claim your free meal, bring the completed crossword up to the office or put it in one of the purple competition boxes around the union. Serious, It’s a free curry, like.

“

it’s really hard, we expect so much more from each other University Olympians

”

Dr Shelley Newman, on the difficulties of being married to your coach, August 1

page 27 James Cole, AU President. Below

WELC ME BACK OLD FRIEND

Issue 767, 1 Spetember 2004 Sport Editors: John Stanton and Thom Airs Email: grsport@hotmail.com Website: www.gairrhydd.net

Cycling endurance

Back Page

Lisbon Losers - page 26 FRESHERS’ GUIDE TO IMG

Sports Editor Thom Airs looks ahead to next year’s IMG

Winners and losers IMG 2003/04 Last year’s netball champions were Pharmacy A, who built an unassailable lead at the head of the Premiership well before the season ended.

The netballers and footballers at Xpresston North End were cursed with bad luck and an inability to win as both teams endured the longest losing streaks in the league.

SAWSA and Carbs A couldn’t be seperated at the top of the rugby division come final day so a play-off was called to decide the championship.

In an exceptionally close match, SAWSA ran out 15-13 victors.

Law A won football’s Premier league after a final-day 5-2 victory over FC Real. At the start of play Law, Mathletico Madrid and Momed could all have walked away as champions.

CARDIFF UNIVERSITY IMG is where legends and villains are created in the name of sport Pontcanna’s playing fields and Talybont’s Astroturf become Wednesday afternoon Meccas upon which hundreds of sporting pilgrims descend.

Football, rugby and netball form the holy trinity of IMG and one footballer described the importance of the competition thus: ”I live for my game of football on a Wednesday. It’s more important than my family to me.”

Within this adored behemoth, football is the biggest competition with 32 teams battling it out each Wednesday afternoon on the sacred turf of Pontcanna (think: Welsh Hackney Marshes with longer grass and rusty goalposts). The season begins in October with a ‘pool’ system of 4 divisions, with final placings dictating the postChristmas league system.

Despite apocryphal stories of former schoolboy internationals mixing it with overweight IMG-ers the leagues are rarely a hotbed of supreme skill, but passions run high on and off the pitch. In last year’s rugby and football the battle for supremacy went down to the final games.

Allegations of cheating and match-fixing led former Sport Editor, Riath alSamarrai, to get carried along on a wave of hyperbole assuring us that: “The 17th day of March 2004 will not be forgotten ...[it] will be remembered as the day Pontcanna met Sarajevo and good sportsmanship was killed in the cross-fire.”

Strong words indeed, but on the final day of the football season three teams could have won the Premiership title, while over on the rugby pitches an unprecedented play-off decided the crown.

A word from the AU president

By James Cole AU President

REGISTRATION AT THIS year’s Athletic Union Sports Fair is going electronic for the first time ever.

In a brand new process aimed at improving the administration of AU members, students signing up to sports clubs will this year also register their The details on cardiffstudents.com there and hapless English Society football then. This idea was put in place by last team were often heavily beat- year’s Athletic Union President, Tom en in last year’s IMG - losing 19- Brown, and represents a continuation of 0 to Carbs A, 11-0 to Optometry the fantastic work he has done in and 7-3 to Cathays FC. They improving and promoting Cardiff ’s studid, however, manage to beat dent website.

Xpresston North End. The AU will be hiring in a number of computers and card-making machines especially for the Sports Fair which is to take place on 1 October in the Union’s Great Hall. This year as part of the registration process all AU members will The whole IMG become members of system is currently cardiffstudents.com and will receive under review, with their AU cards on the spot. Anyone who plans to make fielding does not sign up to cardiffstudents.com ‘ringers’ impossible. will not be registered, will not receive their card and therefore will not be able to play university sport.

This will reduce the length of the queues and

make the whole process far more efficient for students looking to get involved in university sport.

What this new system will also mean, from an Athletic Union point of view, is that we can contact our club members far more easily by both text and email ensuring that no one is missing out on important information. I also hope that this process will have a knock-on improvement on the website itself. If more students are aware of cardiffstudents.com and using the service more often then the clubs – and indeed the union itself – will feel a greater pressure to improve the service and its pages.

This year’s Sports Fair looks to be the biggest ever and I encourage any freshers looking to make the most of their university experience to get to the Great Hall on Friday 1 October and sign up.

For all those looking to play Medics sports go along to Heath campus on 6 October. Whatever the level of sport you’re looking to play, Cardiff Athletic Union will accommodate you, so get to Sports Fair and get involved.

James Cole will be appearing regularly in these pages, keeping you up to date with the latest news from the Athletic Union

Summer Sport Review

Page 26

September 1 2004

grsport@hotmail.com

SUMMER DREAMS RIPPED AT THE SEAMS

With a tear still in the eye and a heavy heart, gair rhydd’s sports team reminisce on a summer of sporting heartbreak

By John Stanton Sports Editor THREE GENERATIONS of gair rhydd Sports Editors travelled to Lisbon in fervent anticipation of a sporting summer to remember, only to return with hopes dashed and hearts broken.

In a summer that had the potential to be the greatest in Britain’s sporting history, we journeyed over land and sea under the guise of journalistic research and used that as justification for the excessive prices we were to pay an overly suspicious tout in a Lisbon backstreet.

Setting out on our adventure, as yet unaware of the heartbreak David Beckham was to inflict upon us with a single strike of his precious right foot, spirits were high. A sense of euphoria swept the masses at a heavily guarded Gatwick Airport as the realisation dawned that we might be about to witness occasions of real history and monumental importance in our turbulent sporting history.

While we anticipated the usual continental taxi driver antics, arriving in Portugal to scenes of flag-clad madmen hanging from the windows of moving cars filled us with dread. Happily, we soon established that they had beaten arch rivals Spain and in the process eliminated them from the competition. We were left with much hope that our hosts had taken the tournament to their hearts and embraced it as the festival it truly is.

No sooner had we settled into our Portuguese surroundings than a large slice of England had crammed itself into the idyllic cobbled streets of the historic

capital, base for the English team for the majority of their all too short stay on these foreign shores.

In a scene Welshmen might consider a living hell, it became impossible to move without the cross of St. George staring straight back at you as a beacon of national pride and identity. Were this the ‘country with the most fans and flags’ competition, for once England would have had no need for penalties. The opposition need not even turn up.

And incredibly, in many instances, they didn’t. Such lethargy from the friendly yet unhopeful Germans enabled us to witness at first hand the title credentials of the Czech Republic as they defeated the Bavarians, despite fielding a reserve team. Quality goals, flashes of brilliance from Czech maestro Marek Heinz and German misery, all witnessed thanks to a ticket bought from a sheepish tout at less than face value price.

Nothing, however, could quite match the previous night’s excitement, or so we thought. For the third Monday in June was the night when, watching in the fan park a short distance from the game, disaster turned to joy and jubilation as England came from behind to blitz Croatia 4-2.

The wild, alcohol-fuelled celebrations carried on into the night as Englishmen turned the historic Rossio Square into a home from home – Trafalgar Square transported to Portugal for just a few dreamy June days. Monuments were transformed from grey symbols of history into red and white beacons of English sporting pride.

While the evening’s events had been enjoyed in the best of spirits and a trou-

ble-free atmosphere – one Englishman appeared not threatening but comical as he lurched forwards from the summit of a three-tier fountain – it was distressing to learn the next day of the stabbing of a fellow Englishman just yards from where we had celebrated just half an hour previously.

The spontaneous outpouring of emotion was symbolised by the impromptu shrine established in the middle of the square; an unmistakable sign of the sense of unity and camaraderie that was so evident amongst all fans, both English and otherwise.

As Thursday and the prospect of England’s tantalising clash with hosts Portugal approached, our search for black market tickets intensified.

As we sat down to enjoy lunch in a traditional Portuguese café, our ‘tickets wanted’ sign ensured there was no shortage of offers, although limited budgets meant some were less appealing than others.

As the afternoon progressed and the clock began to tick towards kick-off, our urgency increased and finally we managed to secure tickets for the princely sum of £150. Money well spent, we convinced ourselves.

What was to follow was amongst the most draining experiences of out lives.

An event, a moment in history which transcended the realms of being a mere “football match”. It proved to be a euphoric, heartbreaking, jubilant and crushing encounter all at the same time and in that order.

As I sat motionless amongst a smattering of remaining England fans half an hour after the referee’s final whistle, the

enormity of what I had just witnessed and the true gravity of the spectacle that had just been laid before me somehow rose from the trauma and anguish of defeat.

Dazed and demoralised, unable to orientate ourselves in the immediate aftermath of such a numbing experience, we completed a circle of the Estadio de Luz, eventually realising that our course had taken us the whole way around the stadium and back to where we had begun, no closer to the comfort of our tents and the solace provided by a soothing sleeping bag.

When eventually we escaped the scene of our defeat, we encountered hordes of euphoric locals, creating scenes reminiscent of the French celebrations in the Champs Elysees after their World Cup triumph of 1998.

As we sought to display nobility in defeat, flags were exchanged and hands shaken before, from nowhere, two of us were attacked from behind by a Portuguese hooligan brandishing a wooden stick.

Alarmed at what they had witnessed, more amiable locals were quick to offer their apologies, while we, heads throbbing somewhat and just a little confused, sought refuge in the form of a police escort. An isolated moment of hooliganism amidst a sea of good will and European cordiality.

Once more, a promising campaign cut short in its prime. We were left with the lingering feeling of what might have been. A familiar story where English sport is concerned but a pain we hoped might be lessened by our remaining summer sporting hopefuls.

HAPLESS HENMAN’S HOPES DASHED HORDES OF ADORING Tim Henman fans were once again left disappointed as the British hero crashed out in the Wimbledon quarter-final to surprise package Mario Ancic.

Henman was defeated 7-6 6-4 6-2 by the world number 63.

Wimbledon’s legendary Henman Hill - expectant after its hero’s heroics at the French Open - was left in stunned silence as the British number one departed SW19 with barely a whimper, leaving Tiger Tim well and truly tamed

WOODWARD’S HEROES MAULED DOWN UNDER A REVAMPED England side returned from the Southern Hemisphere with their recently gained crown as World Champions all but consigned to the history books.

One defeat at the hands of arch rivals and World Cup losing finalists Australia and two to New Zealand, at a combined score of 123-30, means England have lost their aura of invincibility and will begin the new season seeking to restore some much damaged pride.

VAUGHAN’S MEN MUST TRI HARDER

PHOTO: Thom Airs

PHOTO: Thom Airs

PHOTO: John Stanton

PHOTO: John Stanton

PENALTY: Hosts seal victory

TRIBUTE: Stabbed fan mourned

JUBILANT: Portuguese joy

GR EDS: Enjoying the atmosphere

HAVING WHITEWASHED New Zealand 3-0 in the early summer tests, England’s limited overs side capitulated in embarassing fashion as they ended marooned at the foot of the Natwest Triangular Series group table.

A humiliating defeat, including being dismissed for just 101 against eventual winners New Zealand, was the low point of an entirely forgettable series.

A full capacity 100,000 crowd arrived at the Northamptonshire track on Sunday morning.

This was Button’s chance to shine, and he couldn’t have failed to notice the Button-mania sweeping the grandstands on the drivers’ track parade.

The lights went out, and standing at the end of the pit straight I watched Räikkönen take the lead as he, followed by the rest of the field, hurtled past at over 180 mph.

A podium seemed achievable for Button but he disappointed both himself and the crowd, as Brazilian Barrichello in the sister Ferrari took

third instead.

Speaking after the race Button sombrely stated: “I’m disappointed for myself – but more so for the fans and the team because I drove my heart out. There was nothing else I could do.”

We reluctantly left the track and joined the queues for the way home in the glorious English sunshine disgruntled that, not for the first time this summer, our boys just weren’t good enough. Once more the British hopefuls were left trailing in the wake of the prancing hooves of the Ferrari horse.

As bright as a Button but still beaten

By Laura Chamberlain Formula One Correspondent BRITISH FORMULA One hopefuls Jenson Button and David Coulthard failed to impress at this year’s Fosters British Grand Prix.

In my first experience of Silverstone, our drivers could only manage the disappointing fourth and seventh places respectively in what was otherwise an intense and actionfilled weekend.

The Silverstone experience started for me as it does for thousands of spectators every year: in a traffic jam

queuing endlessly for a campsite pitch. Yet before long I was part of the 35,000 crowd that turned up for Friday’s free practice – a figure testament to the continued and growing popularity of the sport.

This figure rose to 65,000 for the Saturday qualifying sessions. Sat at Luffield corner, the turn directly before the pit straight, I watched as six times world champion Michael Schumacher spun his F2004 360° just metres away. He was followed by every other driver farcically

crawling around the track to avoid the forecasted rain in the later session, a stunt that F1 supremo Bernie Ecclestone stated as “taking the piss - a complete joke”.

With Schumacher only managing sixth on the grid, the newly onform Räikkönen on pole and Brit hopeful Button in third, race day promised to be an eventful affair.

September 1 2004

University Sport

Page 27

grsport@hotmail.com

CARDIFF STAFF IN OLYMPIC ODYSSEY

Sport in brief Uni golfers drive forward TWO MEMBERS of Cardiff University’s golf team enjoyed success in Scotland this summer.

Billy Hemstock and Elliot Shaw, both on the University’s Bursar scheme, travelled north of the border to compete in the Boyd Quaich Championship at the world-famous St Andrew’s course.

Hemstock’s impressive level par score earned the second year student ninth place, while Shaw finished twentieth in a field of 72. These results cap a productive season for Cardiff who finished top of the Western Firsts League last season.

Gardner grows to Olympics FORMER ATHLETIC Union President Pete Gardner is another athlete with Cardiff connections to compete in this year’s Olympics.

Gardner, who left the university in 1998, took up rowing in his first year and has since represented Britain in four World Championships with the aid of help from the Lottery Sports Fund.

In 2001, the Oxfordshire-born father-of-two came seventh in the double scull event, rounding off a season which saw his team reach two World Cup Finals.

Pete returned to quadruple sculls for this summer’s Olympics after a slightly disappointing eighteenth place in the World Championship single scull competition.

NEWMAN: Combines lecturing with international athletics stardom

Sports Editor John Stanton talks exclusively to Commonwealth bronze medalist and Athens Olympian Dr. Shelley Newman Lecturer’s son work grows.” attended the games as a physiotherathe same event, and she says this can at

By John Stanton The presence of these two members times prove a strain. “It’s really hard. pist. She said: “It was really hectic, in the sun Sports Editor We expect so much more from each working up to 14 hours per day before of university staff in Team GB, coupled

DEEP WITHIN the ugly concrete monstrosity that is the Biosciences building lies a secret jewel in Cardiff University’s crown and that jewel shone this summer in the glorious Athens sunshine.

Dr. Shelley Newman, a relative newcomer to Cardiff on account of her January arrival at the university, combines lecturing and marking coursework with launching the discus further than any woman in the history of the event in England.

At the time of writing the final outcome of the Olympics is unknown, yet Newman’s participation is indicative of a culture of sporting success within the university.

Newman is coached by her husband Lee, himself the Welsh record holder.in

other than any normal athlete and coach.”

Before departing for Athens, Newman commented: “I’m looking forward to being a part of the whole event but the competition is very strong. I don’t think I have a chance of a medal but I’d love to make the final.”

The former Birmingham University lecturer and student is clear that this may be her last chance of success on a major international stage: “I think I’ll have retired by the time of the next Olympics so this is the important one for me.”

Remarkably, Newman was not the university’s only representative as the Olympics returned to its spiritual home. Nicola Phillips, a senior lecturer in the School of Physiotherapy,

the athletes arrived and then more when the competitions actually began but I really enjoyed it.”

Phillips, whose duties varied but consisted mainly of providing expert support for the weightlifting and diving squads, joined Newman as a representative of Cardiff University in the 17000 strong Olympic Village and claims her presence will have wider benefits for the university.

She stated: “From a university perspective we have already attracted a number of overseas students onto our MSC Sports Physiotherapy programme and I was able to meet up with a Greek student who applied for our course and is working as a volunteer in Athens.

“Hopefully it will mean we get more visitors to Cardiff University as the net-

with Newman’s switch from Birmingham, is further proof that the university is able to attract athletes of the highest calibre.

PHILLIPS: Team GB physio

THE SON OF A Cardiff lecturer is fast becoming one of the rising stars of British athletics.

Tim Benjamin, whose father Mike is a lecturer in the University’s Biosciences department, won the AAAs 400 metres event this summer and pushed out more established athletes such at Iwan Thomas for a place in the Athens Olympics.

With British track athletics in a state of rebuilding, the form of Welshman Benjamin has been exciting patriotic crowds throughout the summer.

GR Sport relies on its contributors. If you would like to be involved please come and see us or send us an email: grsport@hotmail.com

Ever-present Davey stakes England claim with Australian Test victory

By John Stanton Sports Editor HAVING SUFFERED THE heartbreak of missing last year’s Junior World Cup through injury, Kate Davey overcame strained ligaments to ensure her participation in England’s summer

lacrosse tour to Australia.

The tournament, which for psychology student Davey proved successful and consolidated her steady progression as an international athlete, included state matches against regional sides and a series of test matches against their hosts.

While England’s A side returned

having suffered the ignominy of a whitewash, Davey’s B team enjoyed considerable success.

During a hectic three week period which included just three rest days, Davey helped England to a hard fought 2-1 series victory and was pleased with her own performance: “I had some bad games and some really

good games so overall I was pretty happy”.

With the tour a personal success for the member of Cardiff ’s lacrosse team committee, it is also clear that the management were pleased with the squad’s overall showing against fierce opposition.

Davey added, “The Australians are

very strong and also experienced but our coach thought we made a lot of progress.”

While she suggests next year’s World Cup may yet come a little too early in her development, the experience provided by involvement in the national squad can only stand her in good stead for the future.

gair rhydd

IMG: LET BATTLE COMMENCE

ESTADIO DE LOSE

Welcome to what Wednesdays are made for

gr sport venture to Portugal in search of Euro glory

See page 27

See page 26

SUMMER STARS SHINE

By Thom Airs Sports Editor A SUMMER of indifferent sporting performances from Britain’s national sportspeople was countered by some rousing displays from Cardiff University’s finest athletes.

While David Beckham failed to rally his troops and Tim Henman prematurely let us down, the sportsmen and women of Cardiff were building upon the sporting successes of last year.

Our mountain bikers, golfers and athletes turned in strong performances in a summer marked by indifference at a national level.

While the weather may not always have been great, Cardiff University can be proud of an elite band of staff and students that has stood shoulder-to-shoulder with the world’s best.

Kate Davey and Shelley Newman (page 27) showed individual excellence competing for their country while the mountain biking squad (right) and a Cardiff golfing duo (page 27) have boosted the University’s sporting creditionals since June.

Cardiff University’s representation at major sporting events this summer was truly commendable. Forget Euro2004 and southern hemisphere rugby tours when looking back at the holidays and remember the performances of Cardiff ’s sportsmen and women.

GREECE IS THE WORD: Newman before the Olympics

UPHILL BATTLE: Dan Hanratty digs in for Cardiff,

BLAZING SADDLES Cardiff’s finest mountain bikers mix it with the pros in demanding Saab/Salomon endurance test

By Dave Jones MTB Correspondent

FOLLOWING IN the wake of waterpolo’s day-long endurance feat last June, the Cardiff mountain bike club ventured to the Saab/Salomon Mountain Mayhem event in rainsodden Worcestershire.

The 24hr race began with a member of each of the 400 teams running a quarter of a mile in a "Le Mans style" start.

Each of the four team members took it in turn to ride a lap of the 10 mile course around the Malvern Hills.

After good laps from Al Porter and Tom Rackley at six pm Cardiff were ranked within the top 40.

With the preceding week’s rain combined with a few thousand sets of tyre ruts, the state of the course deteriorated quickly and by 2am most of the singletrack climbs became almost

impassable.

The professional riders became professional runners and the rest discovered the joys of rambling in the dark.

The downhills, however, were somewhat farcical.

With dim lighting and no grip, most riders came out looking like failed amateur mud-wrestlers.

As the rain stopped and the sun began to rise at around four am, even the most weary of riders could-

n’t help but get into the spirit of the event.

An 11pm mutiny by the other three team members had forced team captain, Dave Jones, to ride all of the night laps (at marginally above walking pace).

However, by 6am his comrades awoke to enjoy the new drier conditions.

After 24 hours of either riding, falling off or munching pasta, Cardiff ’s team were disappointed to finish in a lowly 177th position.

University sport does us proud as national sides stumble through summer GAIR RHYDD AND QUENCH MAGAZINE IS PUBLISHED BY UNIVERSITY UNION CARDIFF, PARK PLACE, CARDIFF ■ TEL: (029) 2078 1400 EXT. 434 ■ REGISTERED AS A NEWSPAPER AT THE POST OFFICE ■ PRINTED AT SHARMANS IN PETERBOROUGH ■ GAIR RHYDD RESERVES THE RIGHT TO EDIT ALL CONTRIBUTIONS ■ THE VIEWS EXPRESSED ARE NOT NECESSARILY THOSE OF THE PUBLISHERS ■ THE GAIR RHYDD IS WRITTEN, DESIGNED, TYPESET AND OUTPUT BY STUDENTS OF CARDIFF, UNIVERSITY OF WALES ■”I’M A DULL MAN, I MUST LEARN TO BE LESS DULL”: NEW EDITOR KNOWS HOW TO RALLY HIS TROOPS■TWO HOUR PHONE CONVERSATIONS WITH NAKED 17 YEAR OLDS ARE UNDERRATED■SPORT IS THE BIGGEST, BESTEST, LOUDEST, WITTIEST SECTION IN GR TOWERS, GARY SAID SO■HERE ENDS THE FEUD WITH LADIES FOOTBALL■WHO SHOT THEM DOWN?■ROONEY TIL I DIE■CHIN

Merger Special

Page 14

Page 15

TOGETHER WE ARE STRONGER gairrhydd@cf.ac.uk

During the last year barely a week passed without a reference to the merger between Cardiff University and the University of Wales College of Medicine. But what is merger and how does it affect students? gair rhydd presents a quick guide to the process.

A message from the Vice-Chancellor

A

fter months of hard work by staff across both institutions, Cardiff University and the University of Wales College of Medicine began func-

tioning as one institution, known as Cardiff University, on 1 August 2004.

My colleague Professor Stephen Tomlinson, Deputy Vice-Chancellor, and I

are committed to merger because of the huge benefits it will bring to students, staff and to all aspects of our service to society.

I am confident that merger will improve the student experience, from teaching and learning to support services, and will create a larger and more dynamic university with increased capabilities and capacities supported by strategic investment, amounting to £60 million over the coming years.

As a combined institution we will have the size and span of expertise to establish the University as world-class, undertaking teaching and research of international distinction to benefit Wales and the wider world.

This merger is based on strong foundations, including full backing from both institutions’ student unions, and ambitious but realistic aspirations. I am very excited at the enormous benefit it will yield not only for the University, its students and staff, but also for future healthcare provision and economic vitality in Wales. eams from Cardiff University will All our students can feel proud to be part have double the opportunity to win of this exciting new era.

BUSA titles for the coming year Dr David Grant, Vice-Chancellor and beyond.

Cardiff University The University of Wales College of

T

One university - two proud sporting heritages

C

■ Innovative links area for each stakeholder group that follows you around the website – even when you come back ■ Quick reference web addresses, allowing you to find, refer to and relay page addresses to other people simply by giving them a page number ■ Improved, more intuitive navigation, making it easier to browse and find your way ■ Improved accessibility and readability of pages ■ Clean, contemporary and conistent look and feel ■ Search facility on every page.

Content Improvments: ■ Enhanced Locations and University buildings guide, incuding a door-to-door directions service ■ Redesigned ‘Contact Us’ area, improving how communications reach the University ■ Improved ‘Photos & Views’ area, webcams, photo galleries and 360 degree views.

■ An all-new ‘About the University’ guide, containing key information on the University ■ Brand new ‘Research’ area, profiling Cardiff University’s pioneering and dedicated research programmes ■ Provision of a new 'Community & Collaboration’ area, with potential to both showcase and develop our work in this area.

Medicine has been accepted into the BUSA Handbook 2004-6.

In addition to the Cardiff University teams, BUSA has accepted that under the banner “Cardiff Medics”, students from the Schools

that formerly comprised UWCM will enter the field with separate teams to reflect their own long standing sporting traditions.

There will be two men’s football teams, one ladies’ football team, one men’s hockey

team, two ladies’ hockey teams, two netball teams, two men’s rugby teams, one women’s rugby team, one men’s squash team and one ladies’ squash team, all competing under the banner “Cardiff Medics”.

Why is merger good for me?

Merging the websites

ardiff University has launched an improved merged website bringing together content, services and information from both the existing past Cardiff University website and the University Wales College of Medicine website. Check it out at www.cardiff.ac.uk.

The new Cardiff University website brings a number of improvements to the Cardiff University online experience.

■ Key website views for each of our main stakeholder groups - prospective students, current students, staff, industry and commerce, vistors and alumni - putting you directly in touch with the information, links and resources you need, all in one place

Getting together F

M

Hey, where’s my degree from?

For students of Cardiff who, at the time of entry, were registered on a programme leading to a University of Wales award, the degree for which they expect to qualify will remain a University of Wales degree.

For students entering programmes commencing session 2005/06 most wards will

be offered as Cardiff University qaulifications although, in certain specified areas such as medicine, dentistry and some health-related areas, Univeristy of Wales degrees will be retained.

The degree to be awarded is made clear in the prospectus.

erger holds a wide range of benefits for students, particularly as it presents an ideal opportunity to draw on best practice in learning and teaching across the whole merged institution.

Merger enables: ■ more inter-disciplinary collaboration in areas related to health, such as bioethics, medical law, e-science and medical humanities; ■ expansion of postgraduate teaching and research and further development of professional training in health service disciplines through interdisciplinary opportunities; ■ investment in high quality academic buildings, new laboratories, libraries and IT infrastructure; ■ further development of world-class teaching and research; ■ sharing best practice in the area of clinical training/placements; with associated benefits particularly for students in pharmacy and optometry; ■ broader skills training for healthcare students and improved provision of continuing professional development for health professionals, for example in business and management, the Welsh language and other areas.

■ All students will be associated with a larg-

er, more well known and more successful institution with a well established national and international reputation.

To Help Get Organised The merged Cardiff University is providing students with a 'Student Diary', which will

give you all the necessary information you need for all aspects of your student life - from exams procedures through to student societies.

It will also give you details of where to source further information such as web addresses and phone numbers.

ollowing merger, Cardiff University will be able to build on the well established and highly successful track record of collaboration in teaching and research, that has long existed between the University of Wales College of Medicine and Cardiff University, now being formalised through merger.

This partnership - which extends well beyond the well known collaboration in medical and dental degrees - ensures that students receive education of the highest quality from specialist experts.

In keeping with the General Medical Council's views on undergraduate medical education, the medical degree scheme provides an integrated curriculum, blending basic science, to date delivered principally at Cardiff University, with clinical education, delivered at the School of Medicine, and the acquisition of clinical skills as provided in hospitals and general practices throughout Wales, during the entire five years of the course.

Students pursuing the revised integrated dental curriculum have always spent their first year at Cardiff University, and then moved on to complete their remaining four years at the University of Wales College of Medicine.

During their time at Cardiff University in

their first year, medical and dental students are based in the School of Biosciences, but other Cardiff University schools also contribute to the medical curriculum. The School of Social Science and School of Psychology deliver parts of the Human Growth and Development, Health in Society, and Neuroscience aspects of the course. Now, while medical and dental students will continue to enjoy input from a number of different Schools to their studies, they will be members of the same university for the whole of their time in Cardiff.

Partnerships in teaching have extended beyond the traditional medical and dental areas, however, with other students also benefitting from the teaching expertise of the partner institution. This includes students studying subjects as diverse as Physics and Astronomy, Physiotherapy and Radiography, drawing on the expertise of staff in schools in both the previous institutions and collaborative degrees in Medical Engineering and Pharmacology.

This tradition continues, with a large and growing number of interdisciplinary projects undertaken together and in association with a variety of additional partners. These range from small local projects such as shared teaching, to large national projects such as the Wales Gene Park initiative.

As a direct result of merger an investment of more than #10 million is bringing state-ofthe-art brain imaging facilities to Wales.

The new Cardiff University Brain and Repair Imaging Centre (CUBRIC) will feature the latest brain scanning technologies, help experts gain a better understanding of how the brain works and what happens to people who suffer from brain injury and neurological or psychriatric disorders.

Pictured with equipment similar to that to be installed in Cardiff is Professor Peter Halligan of the School of Psychology.

T

he Cardiff University logo has an important role to play in helping to build the recognition and reputation of the merged University nationally and internationally and its continued use has been endorsed by the Merger Commission – the group set up to oversee merger.

Whilst the Cardiff University logo will remain as illustrated, many of its applications, particularly related to stationery, have been updated to increase accessibility and flexibility for users and to modernise the style.

Continuing to project the cohesion and allWales health-care role of the five schools previously forming the University of Wales College of Medicine is an important task.

Reflecting this, the Merger Commission has approved a logo for use exclusively by the five Schools previously of UWCM, to be used with, and in a position subsidiary to, the Cardiff University logo.