gair rhydd - Issue 832 pt2

Simbec is cur r en t ly r ec rui t ing volun t ee rs t o t ake pa r t in clinical s t udies

Why not try something new today!

In return y ou coul d recei ve a gener ous pay ment of ÂŁ300 - ÂŁ2000 depending on the dur ation of the study !

Call now

T r ial dur a t ions va r y; you could f i t us in dur ing your spa r e t ime!

F r e e meals & accommoda t ion a r e provided whils t you a r e on a s t udy.

0800 691995

For your free information pack www. volunteer-research

.com

gairrhydd 35

FEBRUARY.05.2007 SCIENCE@gairrhydd.COM

SCIENCE AND ENVIRONMENT

Science sells Forget sex, advertising’s new best friend is science, even when it’s not real, says Brychan Govier

F

or centuries now, companies have advertised their wares using science to back their claims, ever since consumerism became a leading market force during the industrial revolution.

These early consumer products promised to cure any manner of ailments including deafness, cholera, gout and even “female pills for female ailments” (imagine trying to market those today!)

However, these claims rarely had more than just the faintest shred of truth to them, much like the claims of some modern products. From toothpastes to hair dyes, face creams to dieting pills, these days science is being used ever more to justify the claims being made by manufacturers, using long “scientific sounding” words, graphs, and statistics to sell their products.

Many of the statistics proffered as evidence of the abilities of these products come from very limited testing regimens. If your eyes are sharp enough you can see things like “when tested on 42 women” sat next to an asterisk that is so small it is usually missed amongst the busy nature of the adverts, designed specifically to draw the eye away from the small scale of the trials.

Prime examples of the misuse of science in advertising include the cases of Radium (and its salts) and Thalidomide. At the turn of the century and right up until the 1930’s, long after the Curies had discovered radium and its luminescent attributes, companies began marketing it as a “curative”.

It was marketed as an elixir of life due to its luminescent qualities. The medicine men claimed that it imbued anyone who ingested it, or indeed applied it to their bodies, with a healing energy. After people began losing teeth and hair, and eventually dying of radiation poisoning like Marie Curie, its use in cosmetics was banned During the late 1950’s and early 1960’s Thalidomide was regularly prescribed for morning sickness.

However, there are two near-identical forms of the active ingredient in the drug that at the time could not be separated. The one form is very effective at inhibiting the urge for pregnant women to vomit in the mornings, however the other form has teratogenic (from the Greek “to generate monsters“) properties on unborn fetuses. At the time the pharmaceutical companies did not realise this side effect existed.

There are now ways that Thalidomide

can be prescribed for the treatment of some of the effects of leprosy, and also Crohn’s disease and some types of cancer (ironically, it is the very mechanism that caused the fetal mutations that fights the cancer).

Both of these are examples of a lack of understanding of a substance’s side effects, or indeed the very nature of the substance itself. To cap that, recently a British Medical Journal article revealed that only 6% of the claims made by pharmaceutical companies in their brochures were entirely scientifically verifiable. Of the other claims, 15% lacked any references to scientific study, 22% used made-up references that could not be verified; and the remaining 63% misrepresented the references that they pointed to.

Big companies like this are willing to lie to and mislead doctors who should know better, and they show no compunction about misleading the public. Recently in the USA, the Federal Trade Commission have fined four companies for use of misleading claims in their advertising and ordered them to cease making said claims. The pills in question were diet pills, which the makers not only guaranteed could help the user lose weight, but could also reduce risks of osteoporosis, Alzheimer’s disease and some cancers.

Much of this pseudoscience technobabble is used to advertise products aimed at women, such as anti-wrinkle creams, hair dyes and other beauty products.

While many products claim to be dermatologically tested, what they don’t explain is that the extent of this testing is simply to discern if the products in question will cause adverse side effects like allergic reactions. In many cases though, the tests do not even go that far, nor do these products always pass the tests. In fact, there exist no standardised guidelines for dermatological testing, meaning that the results quoted in advertising are misleading at best.

There now exists moisturisers and beauty creams that contain ingredients such as Co-Enzyme q10, silicone and collagen micro-spheres etc. The only actual effects they have are on the surface layers of the skin, but the cause of wrinkling lies much deeper than that.

The silicone and collagen effectively act as simple fillers for smaller wrinkles. However, Co-Enzyme q10 is an antioxidant, and could conceivably improve skin condition, as it is found within human cells, it is actually far more effective when ingested. It can

also help with heart and gum disease, and breast cancer. Recent studies suggest it can even help protect the brain against Parkinson’s disease and migraines.

Many creams and lotions claim to have the ability to smooth the effects of wrinkles, dimples and cellulite.

However, Consultant Dermatologist Dr Susan Mayou said, “I don't see how a cream can remove the dimples, unless it's Polyfilla.”

There is very little that creams can do to get rid of cellulite The simple fact is that there is very little that creams can do to get rid of cellulite, and even less when it comes to wrinkles, the only thing that’s able to successfully deal with them is plastic surgery, or the liberal applica-

tion of Botox (essentially a form of Botulism) to the wrinkles. But sadly people are still willing to believe the claims of cosmetics companies if a product promises to make them look younger or prettier.

However, of all the adverts in recent years those have bent the scientific truth, one that stands out on its own for the most outlandish claim in cosmetic advertising has to be for a certain American brand of toothpaste that claims to contain liquid calcium. Anyone with access to the relevant chemical tables or the Internet would be able to tell you the calcium liquefies at approximately 1212 degrees Celsius. The firm must obviously mean calcium based salts, but regardless, it is a silly and rudimentary error to make in such a public setting.

MIRACLE METHODS: Made-up medicine?

A British Medical Journal article revealed that only 6% of the claims made by pharmaceutical companies in their brochures were entirely scientifically verifiable

48 gairrhydd

JOBS & MONEY

FEBRUARY.05.2007 JOBS@gairrhydd.COM

Target practice Jobs & Money Editor Gillian Roberts sets you the top five targets to hit this year

A

re you one of the many masses who make new years resolutions each year but conveniently forget to commit yourself to them?

You may have been brushings the things you need to do under the carpet, but it’s time to face the future.

Before you know it you have eaten too many Easter eggs and your finals

Research employment Whatever the year of study you are in, some serious thought must be considered about your future employment plans.

Graduation will appear all too fast and research is better to be carried out sooner rather than later as it can save a lot of time.

Use the number of careers fayres which are held throughout the year and the careers service to keep up to date with your plans or ideas.

Keep an eye out for jobs in the paper you may be interesting in, or graduate training schemes.

Email or contact old employers, or contacts you have come across while on work experience to inquire about any future job opportunities.

The next current career fayre is on Feburary 6 at the Careers service centre, 5, Corbett Road. Named Careers 4 First Years, workshops and stands are avaliable to help first years plan their future career and time in university.

Increase your employability Employers value innovation and creativity where graduates have done something meaningful in their spare time.

University isn’t all about partying and socialising but making sure when you graduate you are work ready.

Work experience helps students to obtain the experience you need for your dream job. It demonstrates dedication to your chosen career, as well as

are looming.

Take time out to sort through what you need, to further your chances of survival after graduation into the world of work.

Jobs & Money have suggested five things students should always be thinking about. Employers regularly slam students for not being workready, prove them wrong and be pre-

pared.

Think S.M.A.R.T. Put it to any task you wish to set your mind to. Firstly, think of the specific objective you want to achieve.

Plan how to measure your task and the amount you want to do. Make the goal realistic, but not to easy or too hard. Set a timescale, when do you want to complete your targets?

improving your skills and making valuable contacts.

Get a part-time job which shows that you can commit to studying and working at the same time. It also shows you are willing to keep updating your skills in employment.

Join clubs and societies so that the more active you are the more you demonstrate commitment, teamwork, time management, communication and organisational skills.

most students have a fair amount. The odd few seem to have their work under control why can’t you?

Organising your time can be challenging (around your twice-a-day dose of Neighbours) but balancing your university work and social life can benefit you in the long run.

Stop procastinating, leave mucking around with facebook and remove your internet connection so that you can get on with some work.

Stop procastinating, leave mucking around with facebook and remove your internet connection Get involved with your university.

For example, helping out at open days or standing on your student council.

You may be able to use someone as a referee who would give you a impressive reference for future employers.

Time to plan Time management skills are essential while working through your degree.

Sort out what you need to do each week and stick to it. That last minute panic is never fun. Reward youself with nights out or time to relax.

Use post-it notes, highlighters and anything that doesn’t make planning feel like a chore to decorate your walls with to-do lists.

Organise your notes as you go along to prevent a messy pile of paper at the end of term.

Make the most of your spare time,

Focus and get your head geared to having a positive attitude. Figure out why you are procastinating. Are you avoiding some urgent work?

Figure out the time of day when you are feeling the most active, as generally different people find they are more effective at different times of the day.

Your effectiveness is a result of your energy levels, stress and distractions.

When planning your time, make sure you add in enough breaks to relax and time to socialise.

Time management is the key to success. The more organised you are, the more you will be able to enjoy and make the most of these short university years.

Get to know your careers service Forget the myth that you have to have a plan in mind to visit the careers service.

The vast amount of information available can help even the clueless students with their future plans. Go to http://www.cardiff.ac.uk/schoolsanddivisions/divisions/stude/carsv/index.h tml, and follow links to the booking system and arrange a time and date when you can secure a meeting with one of the advisors.

Yet, it is not only careers advice that is on offer, but CV tips and applications know-how. All advice is free and students are welcome to pop along anytime to take advantage of the resources available. Whatever your situation, year or how confused you feel about your future, take the time to visit the careers service. You will find the headquarters at 5, Corbett Road on

02920874828, careers@cardiff.ac.uk which is open 8:30-5 Monday to Friday.

Update your CV Your CV is literally an extension of yourself where an employer will judge you on the following questions. Does this candidate demonstrate evidence of the skills and qualities for the job?

Does this candidate stand out in comparison to others?

Presentation is everything, but don’t overdo it, keep it simple yet informative. Keep your personal details section brief and make sure the details are all correct. Leave out your marital status, gender and health status unless specifically needed for the job position.

State your education in the order of the most recent first, including dates, the name of the institution and town.

Include your work experiences, focusing on your responsibilities, achievements and skills you developed, including adding in a job title.

Include a section of your skills looking at recent achievements and what your contributions were, but again keep it simple.

Finally, include the information of your two referees, including their phone number, email, title and full address. If you are running out of space and are not explicitly requested, it is acceptable to state, ‘References available on request.’

Check out Jobs & Money in forthcoming weeks for more CV writing skills.

gairrhydd 37

JOBS & MONEY

FEBRUARY.05.2007 JOBS@gairrhydd.COM

Lucy Higgins looks at how, and why, you should be looking for a part-time job this new year First Years:

M

New year, new job?

any students come to university thinking ‘I’ll leave the first term to settle in, then I’ll look for a job in the New Year’. If you are one of those people, you might be a bit daunted now that it is the New Year and it’s time to start looking.

If you’re not lucky enough to have a job at home that you can transfer to in Cardiff, then you might be a bit confused as to where to start. Is there any point trawling around Queen Street, handing in your CV to employers that dismiss you when they realise you’re a student? The problem is, being students we’re often not around in the holidays, which is something employers aren’t too keen on. Luckily for us, Cardiff is a university city and as well as being quieter in the holidays, students from other universities will come back, meaning time off shouldn’t be too much of a problem, but it’s always better to be honest with employers, and let them know how time-committed you can be to a job.

Depending on the year you’re in, there are different types of jobs that would suit you better. You might have lots of free time in your first year, for example, or want a job that’s more relevant to your degree in your final year.

It’s worth thinking about, because you don’t want to get stuck in a job you hate, or even worse, not be able to find

a job and end up penniless and panicking.

Don’t be restricted by the area you’re living in. Although there are plenty of jobs in Cathays, Roath and the City Centre, Cardiff Bay also has many bars, restaurants, and companies, and it’s easy to get to by train or bus. If you own a car, delivery jobs pay well and have relatively flexible hours.

There are jobs around; you just have to know where to look. The University Jobshop has advice about getting work, and also offers jobs ranging from permanent, to casual, to one-off jobs, to suit every timetable.

Second or penultimate Year: You’ll need to work a bit harder towards your degree now you’re in the second year so try not to work too many hours. It’s a good idea to consider work that could enhance your future employability once you graduate, and by this point, tutors from your course will know you a bit better. Therefore, it’s worth having a look into open days in your department, as they pay well and will look good on your CV.

Third or Final Year:

Obviously by now your degree should be your main priority, but if you still have or want to work, look for casual jobs, which you won’t have to commit to too much. Jobs like leafleting are flexible and easy to pick up if you have a few hours one day. If you are applying for graduate jobs, use your time to research the area you’d like to work in, and companies you are applying for.

Money matters

Safety Steward

Cardiff £5.50 per hour Saturdays & Tuesdays Championship League Football Club requires safety stewards to assist spectators, create a safe environment and maintain ground regulations.

Jobs and Money editor Gillian Roberts talks cash

I

t is all too tempting for students to blow all their money away as soon as they get their student loan this term.

Yet, if you want to avoid even more debt make sure you budget and manage your finances as best you can.

Only withdraw what you have allocated yourself to have each week. Take it out in cash and conveniently forget your card when shopping. Use your loan to pay for your accommodation costs up front so you don’t have to worry about them throughout the year.

Sort out that budget you have always planned to do. Add up what you expect to spend (include that extra takeaway that you know you will have) and see if you can afford it when comparing with the combined money you will get. For example, from parents, loan money, bursaries or grants, against fees, accommodation, food, bills and social life costs.

If you are lucky enough to have parents who can help you out with your money problems then great, but if borrowing cash doesn’t help you manage your budget it can cause more harm to your finances than good.

Firstly talk to your parents: are they able to provide some cash to help you out? Ask about their plans

You’re in an enviable position of having more spare time than most. A sociable job like bar or restaurant work will help you to meet even more new people, but remember if you’re working late hours, make sure you can get home safely. Larger bars, for example, are more likely to help you get a taxi home, but there are more smaller independent pubs and restaurants nearer to student residential areas. Ask about bar jobs in your halls of residence; even if it’s only a couple of shifts a week, it’ll pay for a few Union nights out.

Fundraisers

jobshop in helping you out over the duration of your stay at university. Then make them budget as well as you. If possible, get them to invest your money into a cash ISA, which is tax free and will collect a good amount of interest. It can be put in your name or theirs and can hold up to £3000.

The drip drip of money is better for you than one sum to help your costs over the year. Get a standing order from your parents account to yours which introduces cash monthly or when you will need it the most.

Use your bank. Go into your bank and activate online banking.

They will give you passwords and advice to locate your details. Check your account regularly online to make sure you are sticking to your budget.

Not yet registered with Jobshop?

■ Come and register with our great free service.

We have lots of jobs available both around the campus and outside.

■

Cardiff £7-£11 per hour 3.30pm-9pm Full and Part time available Door-to-door fundraisers needed to knock on doors, inspiring members of the public, through a confident and passionate approach, to make long-term commitments to charity. Full training given.

Night Operations Assistant

Cardiff £5.75 per hour Ongoing A courier company that offers tailored distribution services to a wide range of industry sectors. Duties will include data entry, processing parcels and sorting mail. You need good keyboard and IT skills.

Customer Advisors & Shelf Fillers

Cardiff £5.69 per hour Ongoing DIY retail outlet require part time customer advisors and shelf fillers, they offer flexible working hours and the opportunity to work weekends and evenings.

Please contact us on 029 2078 1535 or pop in to the Jobshop on the ground floor of the Students’ Union. Opening hours 10am-4pm Monday-Friday.

gairrhydd 39

TELEVISION

FEBRUARY 05 - 11 2007 TELEVISION@gairrhydd.COM

This Week’s Fonzies Among the Potsies: February 5 -11

Theroux-m It May Concern

Louis! Rizzo! The Fonz! Hot Teen Action! Coming On Your Screens

HOT

FA Premier L e a g u e Football Stickers.

Primarily as a plot to keep me off the skag I’ve been sucked into the world of football stickers once again.

However, the joys of having a wedge of swapsies thicker than my wallet is less exciting with nobody to swap with.

Soaps Coronation Street is quite clearly the best soap on the telly right now, and this week things get better still with Tracey and Steve finding their way back into each others’ arms.

Magic. I’m personally hoping this won’t last too long ‘cause I’d like to see Stevey get with Kym from Hear’say, almost as much as I’m looking forward to Tracey inevitably having to put out for David Platt. I cannot imagine how hot his sex must be. Also, have you noticed the burgeoning numbers of female mechanics in soaps? Eastenders has that Carly girl (who this week goes mental with a spanner).

Emmerdale has that Dingle kid with the fringe and Neighbours has Steph (obviously) and now Janae.

Talking of her; this week Boyd admits he had a ‘fling’ with some drowning girl in Tasmania. Aces.

M

ost notably, this week sees the return to our screens of Louis Theroux.

He’s been away for nigh on four years and in that time has written a book, which I would imagine I would like but well, I don’t have time for such trivial things as reading, especially since I got my freeview box to work. Theroux has signed a new BBC contract to make ten shows over the course of the next three years. The subject matter for the first of his new shows may seem a little dull, focussing on gambling. But not to worry, ‘cause Beeby Two knows what we like, and so is repeating his earlier ‘Weird Weekends’, starting with PORN, in which Louis attempts to, ahem, ‘enter’ the Adult Movie Industry. Brilliant (Sundays, BBC2).

Only slightly less exciting is the promise of some hot teen sex action in H’oaks (Weekdays, 6.30pm, C4). Young Jean Paul (I know it’s spelt ‘John Paul’ but I’m trying to make it seem a bit romantic - what better way than by using a little French?) has been pining for Craig for ages now, and last week it became clearer still that Craig was coming round to the ways of the softly spoken insipid one. When Craig asked JP if he expected his kids to be a “demon on the decks like their old man” you could just tell that he meant to say he

Fudge Tunnel 96

NOT

Facebook.

Now, naturally I like to spy on people as much (more) than the next man. My qualm with Facebook is that to see most people’s profiles you have to befriend them. Which means that person may think that you like them when really what you want to do is look at what an awful slag they are.

Film wanted him to be a demon on the depths of HIS old man. You know what I mean? I think you do. So this week JP gets all liquored up at the ‘school dance’ and busts a move on Craigy, infront of EVERYONE. Naturally as is SOAPLAW somebody’s on hand to take a photograph of this and flyer it all around school. I dunno why Craig’s complaining so much. If he is into da honeyz then he should be grateful, girls LOVE that gay shit.

Another great comeback this week comes from Henry Winkler.

Now I’m pretty certain the only thing he’s done since Happy Days is The Water Boy. That’s one of the few films I’ve ever seen, so kudos for that Henry, but it’s good to have you back I guess. Not ONLY that, but Out Of Practice (Weekdays, 6.30pm, five) also has Betty Rizzo in it. No doubt Rizzo and the Fonz would make an awesome couple, but now we have them together and WITH KIDS and THEY’RE BOTH DOCTORS. Which could make things a bit dull, and I doubt we’ll get to see them shagging at the Drive Through Cinema, as we inevitably would have had they met in their youth. Imagine the kids! x x xxxxxx

Fonzie says: Hello. I still really don’t know about DVDs, so I’m not going to write about them. But what I do know, is that people LOVE quotes. So here is a quote from Happy Days, to celebrate the return to our screens of Henry Winkler. Sadly his new programme is a sitcom and not some expose on the sex trade so it’s probably going to be rubbish. Not to worry: “Wait a minute. I don't understand something here. I practise all week until I have to limp home and soak my feet. I spend 18 dollars and 50 cents on a monkey suit. Two nerds come along, lock me in my bathroom and start calling me names. Sherlock Holmes here chases me and starts yelling at me.

Cunningham threatens me with physical violence, Shortcake kicks me in the leg and you all want to go

There’s a picture of Tommy Lee Jones in the TV guide infront of me, and it says it’s a still from Under Siege (Friday, 11.05pm, C4) but from the picture it really looks like Richard Lewis. I wish Richard Lewis had been in Under Siege, then I might watch it. This week I watched Moulin Rouge. It wasn’t on telly, but it was alright.

Sport This week’s big sport comes in the form of England v Spain (Wednesday, 7.30pm, 8:00pm).

Last time these two sides met, if I remember correctly, I watched the match in Talybont Social and Rooney kicked Casillas or something. Those were the days.

Rumour has it that Kieron Dyer is gonna be in the England squad.

Shower of shite.

Radio

something, you're not going anywhere lady. THE FONZ WANTS TO

Oh the radio! Well, there’s not a lot I can think to write about the radio for this week, but over the Chrsitmas period I was very excited to listen to Zane Lowe’s experiment of getting mediocre ritish indie stars in to present his show whilst he was on holiday...and KELLY OSBOURNE!! Kelly, incidentally, is completely brilliant and probably produced the best set of the fortnight. Noticeably shite was the Kaiser Chiefs’ playlist, but at least they didn’t play their new single, hey? HEY! Radio--wise for this week, I dunno. You should listen to Huw Stephens’ show because that’s always decent and he’s a lovely, lovely man. And listen to people phone in to Five Live.

40 gairrhydd

MONDAY

FEBRUARY.05.2007 TV@gairrhydd.COM

Waking The Dead

Mouthing Off

BBC1 9.00pm

C4 7.55pm

BBC2 10.00pm

ITV1 3.50am

6:00am Breakfast 9:15am Wanted Down Under 10:00am Homes under the Hammer 11:00am To Buy or Not to Buy 11:45am Car Booty 12:15pm Bargain Hunt 1:00pm BBC News; Weather 1:30pm Regional News and Weather 1:40pm Neighbours 2:05pm Doctors 2:35pm Diagnosis Murder 3:20pm BBC News; Weather; Regional News 3:25pm ChuckleVision 3:40pm What's New Scooby Doo? 4:00pm Raven 4:30pm Best of Friends 5:00pm MI High 5:30pm Newsround 5:35pm Neighbours 6:00pm BBC News and Weather 6:30pm Wales Today; Weather 7:00pm Junior Mastermind 7:30pm Trawlermen 8:00pm EastEnders 8:30pm Panorama 9:00pm Waking the Dead 10:00pm BBC News; Regional News; Weather 10:35pm The Royle Family 11:05pm Film 2007 with Jonathan Ross 11:35pm The Trench 1:10am Sign Zone:Five Days 2:10am Sign Zone:The Truth About Food 3:10am Sign Zone:Planet Food 3:35am Sign Zone:Expedition Borneo 4:05am Joins BBC News 24 Welcome back sweetpeas, all at TV desk hope you had a nice peaceful holiday and exciting New Year and that you’re as pleased as punch to be back (unlike my New Year which didn’t even include a proper countdown or the singing of Auld Lang Syne-shit).

6:00am CBeebies:Fimbles 6:20am The Story Makers 6:40am Balamory 7:00am CBBC:Tom 7:25am Newsround 7:30am Even Stevens 7:50am Batfink 8:00am Suspect 8:30am CBeebies:Bob the Builder: Project Build It 8:40am Tweenies 9:00am Doodle Do 9:20am Ethelbert the Tiger 9:30am Something Special 9:45am Come Outside 10:00am Boogie Beebies 10:15am Toddworld 10:30am Big Slam Poetry 10:50am Around Scotland: Clearances 11:10am Maths Challenge 11:20am Maths Challenge 11:30am Shakespeare: The Animated Tales 12:00pm The Daily Politics 12:30pm Working Lunch 1:00pm What? Where? When? Why? 1:15pm Something Special 1:30pm Bowls: Welsh International Singles Championships 5:15pm The Weakest Link 6:00pm Safari School 6:30pm Masterchef Goes Large or indeed fat as Lloyd Grossman ate all the pies, and the puddings and the starters.....

7:00pm Grow Your Own Veg! 7:30pm Magnus Magnusson: A Tribute 8:00pm University Challenge 8:30pm An Island Parish 9:00pm Nuclear Secrets 10:00pm Trust Me I'm a Healer 10:30pm Newsnight 11:20pm Bowls: Welsh International Singles Highlights 12:05am The Sun 1:05am Joins BBC News 24 2:00am BBC Learning Zone: Languages and Travel:Suenos World

6:00am GMTV Newshour 6:50am GMTV Today 8:35am LK Today 9:25am The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:30am This Morning 12:00pm This Morning: Dancing on Ice Special I didn’t think they could get much worse than Strictly bum prancing but it seems some crazy fucker on drugs who’s being paid far too much for their job came up with a pile of shit more foul and stinking than the last. I’m just holding out for ‘Reality TV: Injuries uncut’. Now that would make good TV, dull, past-theirprime celebrities breaking their limbs and cracking their heads open to stupid music. 12:30pm Loose Women 1:30pm ITV Lunchtime News; Weather 2:00pm 60 Minute Makeover 3:00pm Daily Cooks 4:00pm Morse: 20 Years 6:00pm Wales Tonight 6:30pm ITV Evening News; Weather 7:00pm Emmerdale 7:30pm Coronation Street don’t watch this watch bigbenders as this week we learn that Rob’s shagging Dawn with May’s permission, in order to ‘keep Dawn sweet’ according to ‘What’s On TV’. What a surprise. Oooh the scandal, lovely.

8:00pm Wales This Week 8:30pm Coronation Street 9:00pm Trial & Retribution 10:30pm ITV News; Weather 11:00pm Karaoke Queen 11:30pm Thinternet: Tonight 12:00am WAGs Boutique 1:30am ITV Play: The Mint 3:50am Dial A Mum 4:25am Dial A Mum 5:00am ITV Nightscreen 5:30am ITV Early Morning News

6:00am The Cubeez 6:10am The Hoobs 6:35am The Hoobs 7:00am Freshly Squeezed 7:30am Friends 8:00am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:30am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:55am Frasier 9:30am The Deadly Knowledge Show 10:00am The Hustlers 10:30am The Market 11:00am Trouble Online 11:30am Tricky Business Two 12:00pm News at Noon 12:30pm Ed 1:20pm Science Scams 1:30pm Good Morning, Miss Dove 3:30pm Countdown 4:15pm Deal or No Deal 5:00pm Richard and Judy 6:00pm The Simpsons 6:30pm Hollyoaks 7:00pm Channel 4 News 7:55pm 3 Minute Wonder: Mouthing Off - Tongue Tied 8:00pm Dispatches: At Home with the Terror Suspects 9:00pm Aged 12, and Looking after the Family 10:00pm ER 11:05pm Egomania 12:05am Live from Abbey Road 1:10am 4Play: Duke Special 1:20am Hostage Tapes: Day of the Sniper 2:20am Portrait of a Young Man Drowning 2:30am The Insider: The Muslim Hangover Cure 2:55am Dispatches: At Home with the Terror Suspects 3:45am Get the Picture 4:00am Cuentos Y Leyendas 4:15am Cuentos Y Leyendas 4:30am A Victorian Diary 4:45am The Blue Dragon 5:00am Design and Technology 5:15am Say What You Think 5:30am All About Us 5:45am Eureka! Roman Britain

6:00am Tickle, Patch and Friends 6:25am Old Bear Stories 6:35am Bird Bath 6:45am Hi-5 7:20am Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Friends 7:35am The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and his Best Friend Corky 7:45am Make Way for Noddy or else he’ll put you in a house with a load of dull celebrities who appear to be unaware of the fact that millions of people are watching their every move and thus say shit that will destroy their career forever - twats.

8:00am Fifi and the Flowertots 8:15am Peppa Pig 8:25am Thomas & Friends 8:35am Sailor Sid 8:40am Roobarb and Custard Too 8:50am Mio Mao 9:00am The Wright Stuff 10:30am Trisha Goddard 11:30am five news 12:00pm Home and Away 12:30pm BrainTeaser 1:35pm An Unfinished Affair 3:35pm While My Pretty One Sleeps I draw on his face and shave off half a head of hair.

5:30pm five news 6:00pm Home and Away 6:30pm Out of Practice 7:00pm five news 7:15pm Megastructures 8:00pm Monster Moves 9:00pm Extraordinary People: Tourette's Rewired 10:00pm Prison Break 11:00pm Dark Secrets: Turned Out in Prison 12:00am Arrest and Trial 12:30am Arrest and Trial 1:00am USPGA Golf 1:50am Le Championnat French Football 2:40am Now Is the Time: Night of Combat - Kick Boxing 3:30am The X Games 4:20am Winter

7:00pm Dog Borstal 8:00pm The Baby Borrowers: Friends and Family 8:30pm Thieves Like Us 9:00pm Little Britain 9:30pm Comedy Specials: Bash 10:00pm EastEnders 10:30pm Fat Men Can't Hunt. Why not? What if they had a very large horse? Like a shire horse for example? They can pull massive carts. If the fat man was too fat the horse could just drag him along on a sleigh type thing. However, this may cause difficulties when they reach a fence or a bush that the horse is meant to jump; the fat man could get off at this point and climb a sty or something... actually it would be quite difficult. 11:25pm Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 11:55pm Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 12:25am Comedy Specials: Bash 12:55am Thieves Like Us 1:20am Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 1:50am Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 2:20am Dog Borstal 3:20am The Indestructibles

7:00pm The Sky at Night 8:00pm The World 8:30pm Living with the Future 9:00pm The Great British Holiday 10:00pm Charlie Brooker's Screen Wipe 10:30pm Life on Mars 11:30pm The Great British Holiday 12:30am Charlie Brooker's Screenwipe 1:00am The Sky at Night 2:00am The Worst Job In British Politics? The Leader of the Opposition 3:00am The Great British Holiday Hey hey, don’t read this if you don’t want me to spoil your nightly enjoyment of watching dollyoaks, but according to ‘What’s On TV’ this week the tedious storyline involving John Paul’s gayness finally develops to what we’ve all been waiting for, John Paul kisses Craig at a school dance in front of Hannah, Sarah and the rest of the school. About bloody time I say, it’s time John Paul shared the love. The love-rectangle between the four was becoming too much to bare, I nearly stopped watching.

6:00am Fun Song Factory 6:10am Mopatop's Shop 6:25am Engie Benjy 6:35am Pocoyo 6:50am Fun Song Factory 7:00am Winx Club 7:25am Transformers Cybertron 7:55am Yu-GiOh! GX 8:25am Biker Mice from Mars 8:55am Sonic Underground 9:25am Coronation Street 9:50am Emmerdale 10:20am Emmerdale 10:50am The Oprah Winfrey Show 11:35am Judge Judy 12:00pm Coronation Street 12:30pm Emmerdale 1:00pm Emmerdale 1:30pm The Jeremy Kyle Show 2:35pm The Jeremy Kyle Show 3:40pm The Ricki Lake Show 4:30pm Sally Jessy Raphael 5:15pm Airline USA 5:45pm Judge Judy 7:00pm Dancing on Ice 8:30pm Dancing on Ice - The Skate Off 9:00pm Haunted Homes 10:00pm The Silence of the Lambs 12:20am Coronation Street 12:50am Coronation Street

6:00am E4 Music: Uninterrupted 7:00am E4 Music: Uninterrupted 7:30am Wake Up with the Ordinary Boys 8:00am Wake Up with the Ordinary Boys 8:30am Whatever... You Want 9:00am Whatever... You Want 10:00am Whatever... You Want 11:00am Nothing but... 2001 12:00pm E4 Music: Uninterrupted 1:00pm Freshly Squeezed Extra 2:00pm Switched 2:30pm One Tree Hill 3:30pm Smallville: Superman the Early Years 4:30pm Hollyoaks 5:00pm Friends 5:30pm Friends 6:00pm Scrubs 6:30pm Scrubs 7:00pm Hollyoaks 7:30pm The War at Home 8:00pm Friends 8:30pm Friends 9:00pm Riding in Cars with Boys 11:25pm X-Rated: The TV They Tried to Ban 1:00am Riding in Cars with Boys 3:25am The War at Home 3:45am Desperate Housewives 4:30am Switched 4:50am Switched 5:10am Switched 5:35am Switched

6:10am The Hoobs 6:35am The Hoobs 7:00am Freshly Squeezed 7:30am Friends 8:00am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:30am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:55am Frasier 9:30am The Deadly Knowledge Show 10:00am The Hustlers 10:30am The Market 11:00am Trouble Online 11:30am Tricky Business Two 12:00pm News at Noon 12:30pm Planed Plant Bach:Cegin Twts 12:50pm Planed Plant Bach:Mr Men 1:00pm Planed Plant Bach:Ribidires 1:15pm 3 Minute Wonder: Out of the Box 1:20pm A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 2:25pm Deal or No Deal 3:10pm Countdown 4:00pm Planed Plant:Dennis a Dannedd 4:25pm Planed Plant:Rygbi 100 Per Cent 4:50pm Planed Plant:Ffeil 5:00pm Richard and Judy 6:00pm The Simpsons 6:30pm Rownd a Rownd 7:00pm Wedi 7 7:30pm Newyddion 8:00pm Pobol y Cwm 8:25pm Ffermio 9:00pm Helpu'r Achos

20% student discount on all pizzas and starters Every second pizza half price Call in store for our take away deals

Trust Me, I’m A Healer Dial A Mum

Megastructures five 7.15pm

62 Crwys Road, Cardiff, CF24 4NN

02920 229977

gairrhydd

41

TUESDAY

FEBRUARY.05.2007 TV@gairrhydd.COM

Pyromania

Out Of Practice

Jimmy’s Diaries

Trouble Online

Something Special

C4 11.05pm

five 6.30pm

BBC2 7.00pm

C4 11.00am

BBC2 9.30am

6:00am Breakfast 9:15am Wanted Down Under 10:00am Homes under the Hammer more homes are painstakingly destroyed with the use of a single hammer; it takes a long time.11:00am To Buy or Not to Buy 11:45am Car Booty 12:15pm Bargain Hunt 1:00pm BBC News; Weather 1:30pm Regional News and Weather 1:40pm Neighbours 2:05pm Doctors 2:35pm Diagnosis Murder 3:20pm BBC News; Weather; Regional News 3:25pm CBBC:ChuckleVision 3:40pm What's New Scooby-Doo? 4:00pm Raven 4:30pm SMart 5:00pm Blue Peter 5:25pm Newsround 5:35pm Neighbours wahey things are hotting up between Toadie and Steph this week, and we really didn’t see that coming. I swear it was only a week ago that Max went loopy and skidaddled on a bus to nowhere, what a slut.

6:00pm BBC News and Weather 6:30pm Wales Today; Weather 7:00pm Watchdog 7:30pm EastEnders 8:00pm Holby City 9:00pm New Tricks 10:00pm BBC News; Regional News; Weather 10:35pm Hospital 11:05pm The Innocence Project 12:05am Steal - a thriller about robberies that go wrong with people in it I’ve never heard of, not that that means much. 1:40am Sign Zone:Five Days 2:40am Sign Zone:Ray Mears' Wild Food 3:40am Sign Zone:Expedition Borneo

6:00am CBeebies:Fimbles 6:20am The Story Makers 6:40am Balamory 7:00am CBBC:Tom 7:25am Newsround 7:30am Even Stevens 7:50am Batfink 8:00am Suspect 8:30am CBeebies:Bob the Builder: Project Build It 8:40am Tweenies 9:00am Doodle Do without ‘cocka’ this week 9:20am Ethelbert the Tiger 9:30am Something Special 9:45am Come Outside 10:00am Boogie Beebies 10:15am Toddworld 10:30am Primary History 10:50am Landmarks 11:10am Star Trek: The Next Generation 12:00pm The Daily Politics 12:30pm Working Lunch 1:00pm Science Clips 1:10pm Bobinogs 1:20pm Thinking Skills 1:30pm Bowls: Welsh International Singles Championships 2:00pm am.pm 3:00pm Bowls: Welsh International Singles Championships 5:15pm Weakest Link 6:00pm Safari School - how to fight tigers and catch monkeys to make them be your friends. It’s easier than you think.

6:30pm Masterchef Goes Large 7:00pm Jimmy's Diaries 7:30pm Match of the Day Wales 10:00pm The Children of Helen House 10:30pm Newsnight 11:20pm Bowls: Welsh International Singles Highlights 12:05am Cricket - One-Day International 12:45am Joins BBC News 24 2:00am Revisewise at School: Maths 1 4:00am Revisewise at School: Maths 2

6:00am GMTV Newshour 6:58am GMTV Today 8:35am LK Today 9:25am The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:30am This Morning 12:30pm Loose Women set a poor example to any young girls skiving off school today. They are an absolute mess and all they serve to do is to glamourise and naturalise divorce as if it occurred to them on a whim. The fact that they are all divorced and treat it like the best thing they have ever done is just sad, particularly as it is the topic of every conversation - they could take the subject of peeling potatoes and turn it to divorce. They are all sad, embittered women, with highly disturbing faces and shit guests on their show who mime dire songs and I think it is time we saw the back of them as they are continually puttting me off my lunch. So screw you. 1:30pm ITV Lunchtime News; Weather 2:00pm 60 Minute Makeover 3:00pm Daily Cooks 4:00pm Morse: 20 Years 6:00pm Wales Tonight 6:30pm ITV Evening News; Weather 7:00pm Emmerdale 7:30pm The Ferret 8:00pm Fortune: Million Pound Giveaway 9:00pm You Don't Know You're Born 10:00pm Revenge TV 10:30pm ITV News; Weather 11:00pm The BRITs Are Coming 11:30pm ITV at the Movies 12:00am ITV Play: The Mint 4:10am Redcoats 4:35am The Jules and Lulu Show 5:00am ITV Nightscreen 5:30am ITV Early Morning News

6:00am The Cubeez 6:10am The Hoobs 6:35am The Hoobs 7:00am Freshly Squeezed 7:30am Friends 8:00am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:30am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:55am Frasier 9:30am The Deadly Knowledge Show 10:00am The Hustlers 10:30am The Market 11:00am Trouble Online 11:30am Tricky Business Two 12:00pm News at Noon 12:30pm Ed 1:20pm Science Scams 1:30pm Three Came Home 3:30pm Countdown 4:15pm Deal or No Deal 5:00pm Richard and Judy 6:00pm The Simpsons 6:30pm Hollyoaks 7:00pm Channel 4 News 7:55pm 3 Minute Wonder: Mouthing Off - Scoring 8:00pm You Are What You Eat: Gillian Moves In 9:00pm Strictly Baby Ballroom 10:00pm Shameless 11:05pm Pyromania 12:10am Friday Night Project 1:10am My Name Is Earl 1:40am The War at Home 2:05am Best of the Worst 2:30am Humdrum 2:35am Bob and Margaret 3:00am Bob and Margaret 3:25am The Jamie Kennedy Experiment 3:50am Friday Night In 4:00am Cuentos Y Leyendas 4:15am Cuentos Y Leyendas 4:30am A Victorian Diary 4:45am Design and Technology 5:00am Design and Technology 5:15am Say What You Think 5:30am All About Us 5:45am Eureka! Roman Britain was full of people dressed in sheets.

6:00am Tickle, Patch and Friends 6:25am Old Bear Stories 6:35am Bird Bath 6:45am Hi-5 the high five has been around as early as 1955 and ‘National high five Day’ occurs every third thursday in April every year. You learn something new everyday - don’t say I don’t inform you. 7:20am Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Friends 7:35am The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and his Best Friend Corky 7:45am Make Way for Noddy 8:00am Fifi and the Flowertots love eating jelly tots whilst sitting in flower pots. 8:15am Peppa Pig 8:25am Thomas & Friends 8:35am Sailor Sid 8:40am Roobarb and Custard Too 8:50am Mio Mao 9:00am The Wright Stuff 10:30am Trisha Goddard 11:30am five news 12:00pm Home and Away 12:30pm BrainTeaser 1:40pm Bordertown Cafe 3:40pm Vinegar Hill 5:30pm five news 6:00pm Home and Away 6:30pm Out of Practice 7:00pm five news 7:15pm Hidden Treasure Houses 8:00pm Frankenstein: The True Story Frankenstein’s monster is really Jade Goody in disguise.9:00pm CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 10:00pm CSI: Miami 11:00pm True CSI 12:00am The FBI Files 1:00am NBA Action 1:25am NBA Basketball 3:55am A1 Grand Prix 4:45am Race and Rally UK 5:05am World Supercross Grand Prix Championship

7:00pm New Dog Borstal 8:00pm Brand New Spendaholics I can state that I am definitely not a spendaholic, I am just too tight. I got excited the other day while considering a weekend in Dublin with my friend, but then decided this would cost money and that I didn’t have much so we decided against it. I then considered a trip to Brum with a visit to the sea life centre but decided against this also due to the money factor... there is a trend occurring here is there not? Soon I won’t be eating because it costs money, I may even stop buying wine and newspapers... this would not be good. I need to live a little. Donations are welcome. 9:00pm New Wedding Stories 10:00pm EastEnders 10:30pm Thieves Like Us 10:55pm Family Guy 11:15pm Family Guy 11:40pm Man Stroke Woman 12:10am Fat Men Can't Hunt 1:10am New Dog Borstal 2:05am Brand New Spendaholics 3:05am Thieves Like Us

7:00pm Time Shift: Spy Stories 8:00pm The World 8:30pm Lead Balloon 9:00pm Knowing Me, Knowing You... with Alan Partridge 9:30pm The League of Gentlemen 10:00pm Cooking in the Danger Zone 10:30pm Life on Mars 11:30pm Creating Life on Mars 11:50pm The Cult of... Survivors 12:20am Lead Balloon 12:50am Living with the Future 1:20am Every Prime Minister Needs a Willie: Or How to Be a Deputy what if you’re a female prime minister? Huh? What about Margaret Thatcher? Actually, I take it back, she may have had one - we can’t be sure.

But not all prime ministers have to have a willy, maybe if they didn’t they’d be a bit more sensible and stop starting wars and saying silly things. I don’t think Blair would like us castrating him to see though... pity. 2:20am Time Shift: Spy Stories 3:20am The Cult of... Survivors 3:50am Lead Balloon

6:00am Fun Song Factory 6:10am Mopatop's Shop 6:25am Engie Benjy 6:35am Pocoyo 6:50am Fun Song Factory 7:00am Winx Club 7:25am Transformers Cybertron 7:55am Yu-GiOh! GX 8:25am Biker Mice from Mars 8:55am Sonic Underground 9:25am Coronation Street 9:55am Emmerdale 10:25am The Oprah Winfrey Show 11:10am Judge Judy 12:30pm Coronation Street 1:00pm Emmerdale 1:30pm The Jeremy Kyle Show 2:35pm The Jeremy Kyle Show 3:40pm The Ricki Lake Show 4:30pm Sally Jessy Raphael 5:15pm Airline USA 5:45pm Judge Judy 7:00pm American Idol 8:00pm American Idol 9:00pm WAGs Boutique 10:00pm Hannibal 12:35am Manhunter 2:50am ITV Play: The Mint 4:00am Teleshopping

6:00am E4 Music: Uninterrupted 7:00am E4 Music: Uninterrupted 7:30am Wake Up with... Simon Webbe 8:00am Wake Up with... Simon Webbe 8:30am Whatever... You Want 9:00am Whatever... You Want 10:00am Whatever... You Want 11:00am Nothing but... 2002 12:00pm E4 Music: Uninterrupted 1:00pm Freshly Squeezed Extra 2:00pm Switched 2:30pm One Tree Hill 3:30pm Smallville: Superman the Early Years 4:30pm Hollyoaks 5:00pm Friends 5:30pm Friends 6:00pm Scrubs 6:30pm Scrubs 7:00pm Hollyoaks 7:30pm The War at Home 8:00pm Friends 8:30pm Friends 9:00pm The OC 10:00pm Skins 11:05pm Shameless 12:05am Scrubs 12:40am Scrubs 1:05am Smallville: Superman the Early Years 1:55am Skins 2:55am The War at Home 3:15am No Angels 4:15am One Tree Hill 4:55am Switched 5:15am Switched

6:10am The Hoobs 6:35am The Hoobs 7:00am Freshly Squeezed 7:30am Friends 8:00am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:30am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:55am Frasier 9:30am The Deadly Knowledge Show 10:00am The Hustlers 10:30am The Market 11:00am Trouble Online 11:30am Campyfan 12:00pm News at Noon 12:30pm Planed Plant Bach:Cegin Twts 12:50pm Planed Plant Bach:Peppa Pinc 1:00pm Planed Plant Bach:Sam Tan 1:15pm 3 Minute Wonder: the Birth Day 1:20pm The Search 2:25pm Deal or No Deal 3:10pm Countdown 4:00pm Planed Plant:Joni Trons 4:30pm Planed Plant:Helynt Hurt Tywysogion Cymru 4:50pm Planed Plant:Ffeil 5:00pm Richard and Judy 6:00pm The Simpsons 6:25pm Tipit 7:00pm Wedi 7 7:30pm Newyddion 8:00pm Pobol y Cwm 8:25pm Y Byd ar Bedwar 9:00pm Tywysogion 10:00pm Cowbois ac Injans 11:00pm Y Clwb Pel-Droed

20% student discount on all pizzas and starters Every second pizza half price Call in store for our take away deals

62 Crwys Road, Cardiff, CF24 4NN

02920 229977

42 gairrhydd

WEDNESDAY

Diagnosis Murder

The Flying Gardener

BBC1 2.35pm

BBC2 11.15am

6:00am Breakfast 9:15am Wanted Down Under 10:00am Homes under the Hammer 11:00am To Buy or Not to Buy 11:45am Car Booty 12:15pm Bargain Hunt 1:00pm BBC News; Weather 1:30pm Regional News and Weather 1:40pm Neighbours 2:05pm Doctors 2:35pm Diagnosis Murder 3:20pm BBC News; Weather; Regional News 3:25pm CBBC:ChuckleVision 3:40pm What's New Scooby-Doo? 4:00pm Raven My good friend at home got the Interactive DVD game of this for Christmas. He’s 21. It was bloody good fun though... 4:30pm Best of Friends 5:00pm Blue Peter 5:25pm Newsround 5:35pm Neighbours 6:00pm BBC News and Weather 6:30pm Wales Today; Weather 7:00pm Holiday 2007 7:30pm Match of the Day Live 10:00pm BBC News; Regional News; Weather 10:35pm The National Lottery Draws 10:40pm Wales: Power and the People 11:10pm A Time to Kill 1:40am Sign Zone:Wild Caribbean 2:30am Sign Zone:Mission Africa 3:00am Sign Zone:Expedition Borneo 3:30am Joins BBC News 24 TV readers, it’s good to be back. Admittedly this is only my second attempt at writing for these hallowed pages but my absence from them has burned a fire within my soul. Or something. I hope you’ve all had a very merry Christmas and all that yadda yadda. Oh, and I like your new jumper, by the way.

6:00am CBeebies:Fimbles 6:20am The Story Makers 6:40am Balamory 7:00am CBBC:Tom 7:25am Newsround 7:30am Even Stevens 7:50am Batfink 8:00am Suspect 8:30am CBeebies:Bob the Builder: Project Build It 8:40am Tweenies 9:00am Doodle Do 9:20am Ethelbert the Tiger 9:30am Something Special 9:45am Come Outside 10:00am Boogie Beebies 10:15am Toddworld 10:30am Star Trek: The Next Generation 11:15am The Flying Gardener 11:30am 1:00pm Uncharted Territory 1:30pm Working Lunch 2:00pm Bowls: Welsh International Singles Championships 5:15pm Weakest Link 6:00pm Safari School 6:30pm Masterchef Goes Large 7:00pm A New Year at Kew 7:30pm Grow Your Own Veg! 8:00pm Dragons' Den 9:00pm Party Animals 9:50pm The Verdict Preview 10:00pm Never Mind the Buzzcocks 10:30pm Newsnight 11:20pm Bowls: Welsh International Singles Highlights 12:05am The Battle for British Art 1:05am Joins BBC News 24 2:00am BBC Learning Zone: Schools:Revisewise Challenge at School: Maths Why are all the educational shows at night? Is it not past bedtime. Or is it that, in fact, all the kids are on drugs now so that actually at this time they are whizzed off their tits and ready to learn? Discuss.

7:00pm New Dog Borstal 8:00pm New Wedding Stories 9:00pm Super-Slim Me: A Mischief Special 10:00pm The Breakfast Club 11:35pm Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 12:05am Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 12:35am Super-Slim Me: A Mischief Special 1:30am New Wedding Stories 2:30am Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 3:00am Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps ... tell you what it is though, cos otherwise you will all go on it and then they will be taken down and I may cry.

2. Seven simple words have been distracting me this week: Pro Evo Six, Multi Tap (it is two words, ok?), Four Controllers. Crazy days.

3. Facebook, and I’m ashamed to say it - I didn’t have a myspace, I thought I was above all that nonsense. But oh no, it lured me in with its photos and friends and groups and events and ARGH. I am everything I used to hate... (....Facebook me!!)

7:00pm Planet Earth 8:00pm The World 8:30pm Cooking in the Danger Zone 9:00pm Medical Mavericks 10:00pm More Dawn French's Girls Who Do: Comedy 10:30pm Godless in America: Storyville 11:30pm Cooking in the Danger Zone 12:00am The Great British Holiday 1:00am Tired and Emotional 2:00am Godless in America: Storyville 3:00am Medical Mavericks I have got into a really bad habit of late that occurs at normally round about this time. Falling asleep in bed with my laptop. It’s a lovely way to drift off, I must say, but hearing nearly a grand’s worth of computing equipment crash to the ground is not a nice way to wake up. I must look after my things, I must look after my things, I must look after my things... On a completely unrelated note, go check out Stray Borders, at Clwb Ifor Bach on 10/2/07 with Future of the Left and Kill Kenada.

20% student discount on all pizzas and starters Every second pizza half price Call in store for our take away deals

FEBRUARY.05.2007 TV@gairrhydd.COM

E4 9.00pm

Great Ocean Adventure five 7.15pm

6:00am GMTV Newshour 6:58am GMTV Today 8:35am LK Today 9:25am The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:30am This Morning 12:30pm Loose Women 1:30pm ITV Lunchtime News; Weather 2:00pm 60 Minute Makeover 3:00pm Daily Cooks 4:00pm Midsomer Murders 6:00pm Wales Tonight 6:30pm ITV Evening News; Weather 7:00pm Emmerdale 7:30pm Coronation Street 8:00pm The Bill 9:00pm Something's Gotta Give 10:30pm ITV News; Weather 11:00pm Something's Gotta Give 12:00am Harry Hill's TV Burp 12:25am ITV Play: The Mint 4:05am The Jeremy Kyle Show Jeremy Kyle, as some of you may know, recently featured in the Act One society’s alternative pantomime, Jack and His Giant Beanstalk. Did you see it? I thought it was quite good, myself. You did too?

Well, then you’ll be pleased to know that there will be a DVD out soon. Oh yes. Then I can watch myself over and over and over again. Bring it on. (see myspace.com/climbmystalk for more info). 5:00am ITV Nightscreen 5:30am ITV Early Morning News Here are a list of Worst Topics For Pub Conversation.

A gift from me to you in order to help you not look like a plum in public: 1. How leading high street electrical outlets acquire the laptops they sell.

2. Anything, ANYTHING at all to do with a maths degree.

3. MY hair.

6:00am The Cubeez 6:10am The Hoobs 6:35am The Hoobs 7:00am Freshly Squeezed 7:30am Friends 8:00am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:30am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:55am Frasier 9:30am The Deadly Knowledge Show 10:00am The Hustlers 10:30am The Market 11:00am Trouble Online 11:30am Tricky Business Two 12:00pm News at Noon 12:30pm Ed 1:25pm Science Scams 1:35pm Danger Within 3:30pm Countdown 4:15pm Deal or No Deal 5:00pm Richard and Judy 6:00pm The Simpsons 6:30pm Hollyoaks 7:00pm Channel 4 News 7:55pm 3 Minute Wonder: Mouthing Off - Farewell Packets of Ten 8:00pm Relocation, Relocation 9:00pm Jamie's Chef 10:00pm Desperate Housewives 11:05pm Erotomania 12:05am Gumball 3000 12:40am Gumball 3000 1:10am Goalissimo! 2:10am Freesports on 4 2:35am Trans World Sport 3:25am Girl Racers 4:25am Thunder Races 5:25am Countdown ‘But TV John II’, I hear you cry, ‘if we can’t talk about laptops, maths, or you’re hair, what CAN we talk about in the pub?!’ Never fear, my children, how ‘bout you try these out for size: 1. The match.

2. The weather.

3. The opposite sex.

4. Your own sex.

5. Anything that isn’t maths or my hair.

6:00am Tickle, Patch and Friends 6:25am Old Bear Stories 6:35am Bird Bath 6:45am Hi-5 7:20am Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Friends 7:35am The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and his Best Friend Corky 7:45am Make Way for Noddy 8:00am Fifi and the Flowertots 8:15am Peppa Pig 8:25am Thomas; 8:35am Sailor Sid 8:40am Roobarb and Custard Too 8:50am Mio Mao 9:00am The Wright Stuff 10:30am Trisha Goddard 11:30am five news 12:00pm Home and Away 12:30pm BrainTeaser 1:40pm Hard to Forget 3:40pm The Hound of the Baskervilles 5:30pm five news 6:00pm Home and Away 6:30pm Out of Practice 7:00pm five news 7:15pm Great Ocean Adventures: The Thresher Shark 8:00pm So You Think You Can Nurse?

9:00pm What's Eating Victoria Beckham?

10:00pm Replicant 12:00am PartyPoker.com European Open III 1:30am NHL Ice Hockey 4:05am Boxing: Fight of the Week 5:10am Rolex Grand Am. As I am finding these lists a quite effective and efficient means of filling up space, I will continue.... How about things that are distracting my attention at the moment: 1. Watching episodes of television shows on the internet. I’ve found this wicked site, yeah - it’s all bangin and poppin and all that jazz. Ain’t gonna...

6:00am Fun Song Factory 6:10am Mopatop's Shop 6:25am Engie Benjy 6:35am Pocoyo 6:50am Fun Song Factory 7:00am Winx Club 7:25am Transformers Cybertron 7:55am Yu-GiOh! GX 8:25am Biker Mice From Mars 8:55am Sonic Underground 9:25am Coronation Street 9:55am Emmerdale 10:20am The Oprah Winfrey Show 11:10am Judge Judy 12:30pm Coronation Street 1:00pm Emmerdale 1:30pm The Jeremy Kyle Show 2:35pm The Jeremy Kyle Show 3:40pm The Ricki Lake Show 4:30pm Sally Jessy Raphael 5:15pm Airline USA 5:45pm Judge Judy 7:00pm The New Adventures of Superman 8:00pm Nanny 911 9:00pm Al Murray's Happy Hour 10:00pm Coronation Street 10:30pm Manhunter 12:50am Comedy Cuts 1:20am ITV Play: The Mint 4:00am Teleshopping

6:00am E4 Music: Uninterrupted 7:00am E4 Music: Uninterrupted 7:30am Wake Up with... Leonardo DiCaprio 8:00am Wake Up with...

Leonardo DiCaprio 8:30am Whatever...

You Want 9:00am Whatever... You Want 10:00am Whatever... You Want 11:00am Nothing but 2003 12:00pm E4 Music: Uninterrupted 1:00pm Freshly Squeezed Extra 2:00pm Switched 2:30pm One Tree Hill 3:30pm Smallville: Superman the Early Years 4:30pm Hollyoaks 5:00pm Friends 5:30pm Friends 6:00pm Scrubs 6:30pm Scrubs 7:00pm Hollyoaks 7:30pm The War at Home 8:00pm Friends 8:30pm Friends 9:00pm Ugly Betty 10:00pm High School Dance 11:00pm Desperate Housewives 12:00am Scrubs 12:30am Scrubs 12:55am Smallville: Superman the Early Years 1:45am High School Dance 2:45am The War at Home 3:05am Desperate Housewives 3:50am One Tree Hill

6:10am The Hoobs 6:35am The Hoobs 7:00am Freshly Squeezed 7:30am Friends 8:00am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:30am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:55am 3 Minute Wonder: Mouthing Off - Tongue Tied 9:00am Ysgolion (Schools) (9.30-12.00):Tricky Business Two 9:30am The Deadly Knowledge Show 10:00am The Hustlers 10:30am The Market 11:00am Trouble Online 11:30am Bobinogi 11:45am Bobinogi 12:00pm News at Noon 12:30pm Planed Plant Bach:Cegin Twts 12:45pm Planed Plant Bach:Caio 1:00pm Planed Plant Bach:Bobinogi 1:15pm 3 Minute Wonder 1:20pm You Are What You Eat: Gillian Moves In 2:25pm Deal or No Deal 3:10pm Countdown 4:00pm Planed Plant:Tair Slic 4:25pm Planed Plant (4.00-5.00):Stwffio 4:50pm Planed Plant (4.00-5.00):Ffeil 5:00pm Richard and Judy 6:00pm The Simpsons 6:30pm Rownd a Rownd 7:00pm Wedi 7 7:30pm Newyddion

Bowls: International Singles BBC2 2.00pm

Ugly Betty

62 Crwys Road, Cardiff, CF24 4NN

02920 229977

gairrhydd

43

THURSDAY

FEBRUARY.05.2007 TV@gairrhydd.COM

Street Doctor

Toddworld

Benidorm

Child Genius

Pushy Parents

BBC1 7pm

BBC2 10.15am

ITV1 10pm

Channel 4 9pm

five 8pm

6:00am Breakfast 9:15am Wanted Down Under 10:00am Homes under the Hammer 11:00am To Buy or Not to Buy 11:45am Car Booty 12:15pm Bargain Hunt 1:00pm BBC News; Weather 1:30pm Regional News and Weather 1:40pm Neighbours 2:05pm Doctors 2:35pm Diagnosis Murder 3:20pm BBC News; Weather; Regional News 3:25pm CBBC:ChuckleVision 3:40pm What's New Scooby Doo? 4:00pm Raven 4:30pm SMart 5:00pm Blue Peter 5:25pm Newsround 5:35pm Neighbours 6:00pm BBC News and Weather 6:30pm Wales Today; Weather 7:00pm Street Doctor 7:30pm EastEnders So quite a lot has happened in Eastenders since before Christmas. I won’t go into detail but I did watch it a hell of a lot and I must say I thoroughly enjoyed it. Loads of other stuff has happened in real life. I went home for the holidays and ate Christmas dinner and sat around and then I wrote some essays.

8:00pm Waterloo Road 9:00pm Crimewatch 10:00pm BBC News; Regional News; Weather 10:35pm Dragon's Eye 11:05pm Question Time 12:05am Crimewatch Update 12:15am This Week 1:05am Sign Zone:When Love Comes to Town 1:35am Sign Zone:Super Vets 2:05am Sign Zone:The Children of Helen House 2:35am Sign Zone:Expedition Borneo 3:05am Joins BBC News 24

6:00am CBeebies:Fimbles 6:20am The Story Makers 6:40am Balamory 7:00am CBBC:Tom 7:25am Newsround 7:30am Even Stevens 7:50am Batfink 8:00am Suspect 8:30am CBeebies:Bob the Builder: Project Build It 8:40am Tweenies 9:00am Doodle Do 9:20am Ethelbert the Tiger 9:30am Something Special 9:45am Come Outside 10:00am Boogie Beebies 10:15am Toddworld 10:30am Look and Read: Spywatch 10:50am Words and Pictures 11:00am English Express 11:20am English Express 11:40am Primary Geography 11:50am Focus 12:00pm The Daily Politics 12:30pm Working Lunch 1:00pm Uncharted Territory 1:30pm Bowls: Welsh International Singles Championships 5:15pm Weakest Link 6:00pm Safari School 6:30pm Masterchef Goes Large 7:00pm Bill Oddie Back in the USA 7:30pm Dr Alice Roberts: Don't Die Young Definitely watch this if you don’t want to die young. What advice will Dr Alice give us? Don’t play with guns?

8:00pm Did They Pay Off Their Mortgage in Two Years?

9:00pm The Truth About Food 10:00pm Mock the Week 10:30pm Newsnight 11:20pm Bowls: Welsh International Open Highlights 12:05am Alchemists of Sound 1:05am Joins BBC News 24 2:00am BBC Learning Zone: Schools:Expressive Arts: The Art 4:00am Expressive Arts

6:00am GMTV Newshour 6:58am GMTV Today 8:35am LK Today 9:25am The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:30am This Morning 12:30pm Loose Women 1:30pm ITV Lunchtime News; Weather 2:00pm 60 Minute Makeover 3:00pm Daily Cooks 4:00pm Midsomer Murders 6:00pm Wales Tonight 6:30pm ITV Evening News; Weather 7:00pm Emmerdale 7:30pm Fishlock's Wild Tracks 8:00pm The Bill 9:00pm Bonkers 10:00pm Benidorm I haven’t been to Benidorm but I imagine it’d be pretty nasty. I might be wrong but isn’t it an 18-30s resort? I went on a’lads’ holiday’ once. We went to Tenerife after ALevels. It was alright. Can you believe that I didn’t drink one drop of alcohol.

Not that I think it’s big and clever to drink, but if I went there now I’d have to get drunk just so I could attempt to deal with the cunts who were there. It was pretty awful looking back, the clubs were terrible and the people were worse. The best bit was our hotel. I quite enjoyed that. I haven’t been abroad since then. Who needs to go abroad when you’ve got Cardiff? I don’t, its quite a mild day and if it was hotter I’d be moaning.

10:30pm ITV News; Weather 11:00pm Call Up 11:30pm Waterfront 12:00am Unsigned 12:30am ITV Play: Make Your Play 4:10am Make Me Perfect 5:00am ITV Nightscreen 5:30am ITV Early Morning News

6:10am The Hoobs 6:35am The Hoobs 7:00am Freshly Squeezed 7:30am Friends 8:00am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:30am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:55am Frasier 9:30am The Deadly Knowledge Show 10:00am The Hustlers 10:30am The Market 11:00am Trouble Online 11:30am My Crazy Life 12:00pm News at Noon 12:30pm Ed 1:25pm Science Scams 1:35pm Angels One Five 3:30pm Countdown 4:15pm Deal or No Deal 5:00pm Richard and Judy 6:00pm The Simpsons 6:30pm Hollyoaks 7:00pm Channel 4 News 7:55pm 3 Minute Wonder: Mouthing Off - Contagious A five (three?) minute programme about the diseases which can be caught by administering oral sex on strangers. I’m intrigued because I don’t think I could give a stranger oral, whether it’s a male or female, unless they offered me a tidy sum of money. Maybe £20? Is that too little? £50? Is that too much? Fuck, naming your price is difficult, I best hit the streets and do some ‘market research’. I don’t want to catch any diseases though, this is just a vicious circle.

8:00pm 10 Years Younger 9:00pm Child Genius 10:30pm The Enforcer 12:15am Black Widow 2:10am A Swinging Murder 3:10am Perfect 3:20am Aged 12, and Looking after the Family 4:20am Help Me Help My Child 5:20am Countdown

6:00am Tickle, Patch and Friends 6:25am Old Bear Stories 6:35am Bird Bath 6:45am Hi-5 7:20am Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Friends 7:35am The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 7:45am Make Way for Noddy 8:00am Fifi and the Flowertots 8:15am Peppa Pig 8:25am Thomas & Friends 8:35am Sailor Sid 8:40am Roobarb and Custard Too 8:50am Mio Mao 9:00am The Wright Stuff 10:30am Trisha Goddard 11:30am five news 12:00pm Home and Away 12:30pm BrainTeaser 1:30pm The Secret War of Jackie's Girls 3:35pm OSS 5:30pm five news 6:00pm Home and Away 6:30pm Out of Practice 7:00pm five news 7:15pm Animal Attraction: Macho Males Rubber Duck or Fun Factory gives us a great insight into the Macho prick Males. I saw some dick having a go at someone in the toilet because they had skinny jeans on. Needless to say he was wearing a shirt and shoes in Fun Factory. Oh and he admitted to playing American Football. So dickface, if you can read, read this: you should probably sort your life out.

8:00pm Pushy Parents 9:00pm Build a New Life in the Country 10:00pm Criminal Minds 11:00pm CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12:00am John Barnes' Football Night 1:00am Quiz Call 4:00am Dutch Football 5:35am Motorsport Mundial

7:00pm New Dog Borstal 8:00pm The Baby Borrowers 9:00pm Teens Hooked on Porn 10:00pm EastEnders 10:30pm Man Stroke Woman 11:00pm Comedy Shuffle 11:30pm Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 12:00am Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 12:30am Teens Hooked on Porn 1:25am Man Stroke Woman 1:55am Comedy Shuffle 2:25am Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 2:55am Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 3:20am The Indestructibles No, I don't really want to die, I only want to die in your eyes. I'm still here below the chandelier, where they always used to read us our rights. I want to wander through the night, as a figure in the distance even to my own eye. Have you ever rented a room? Have you ever even rented a room? An anchor lets you see the river move, but now that your evil dreams came true, there on your face...

7:00pm Sounds of the Sixties 7:10pm The Avengers 8:00pm The World 8:30pm Marcus Brigstocke's Trophy People 9:00pm Soul Brittania on Later... 10:00pm The Secret Life of Mrs Beeton 11:25pm Charlie Brooker's Screenwipe 11:55pm Soul Britannia 12:55am Marcus Brigstocke's Trophy People 1:25am Charlie Brooker's Screenwipe 1:55am Gay MPs: Pride and Prejudice in Politics 2:45am The Secret Life of Mrs Beeton A row of teeth he'll come to replace. I know you laughed when I left but you really only hurt yourself. When you see your curtains move in the wind you can bet I'm betting against you again. 'Cause I'm a man who has a wife who has a mother, who married one but she loved another. You're a tower without the bells, you're a negative wishing well. I should have checked the stable door for the name of the sire and dam.

6:00am Fun Song Factory 6:10am Mopatop's Shop 6:25am Engie Benjy 6:35am Pocoyo 6:50am Fun Song Factory 7:00am Winx Club 7:25am Transformers Cybertron 7:55am Yu-GiOh! GX 8:25am Biker Mice from Mars 8:55am Sonic Underground 9:25am Coronation Street 9:55am Emmerdale 10:20am The Oprah Winfrey Show 11:10am Judge Judy 12:30pm Coronation Street 1:00pm Emmerdale 1:30pm The Jeremy Kyle Show 2:35pm The Jeremy Kyle Show 3:40pm The Ricki Lake Show 4:30pm Sally Jessy Raphael 5:15pm Airline USA 5:45pm Judge Judy 7:00pm The New Adventures of Superman 8:00pm WAGs Boutique 9:00pm Kelly Osbourne: Turning Japanese 10:00pm Supernatural 11:00pm Comedy Cuts 11:30pm Entourage 12:05am The Office: An American Workplace

6:00am E4 Music: Uninterrupted 7:00am E4 Music: Uninterrupted 7:30am Wake Up with Al Murray 8:00am Wake Up with Al Murray 8:30am Whatever... You Want 9:00am Whatever... You Want 10:00am Whatever... You Want 11:00am Nothing but 2004 12:00pm E4 Music: Uninterrupted 1:00pm Freshly Squeezed Extra 2:00pm Switched 2:30pm One Tree Hill 3:30pm Smallville: Superman the Early Years 4:30pm Hollyoaks 5:00pm Friends 5:30pm Friends 6:00pm Scrubs 6:30pm Scrubs 7:00pm Hollyoaks 7:30pm The War at Home 8:00pm Friends 8:30pm Friends 9:00pm ER 10:00pm Skins 11:00pm X-Rated 12:05am Scrubs 12:35am Scrubs 1:05am Smallville: Superman the Early Years 1:55am Skins 2:55am The War at Home 3:15am No Angels 4:15am One Tree Hill 4:55am Switched 5:15am Switched 5:35am Switched

6:10am The Hoobs 6:35am The Hoobs 7:00am Freshly Squeezed 7:30am Friends 8:00am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:30am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:55am 3 Minute Wonder: Mouthing Off - Scoring 9:00am Ysgolion (Schools) (9.30-12.00):Tricky Business Two 9:30am The Deadly Knowledge Show 10:00am The Hustlers 10:30am The Market 11:00am Trouble Online 11:30am Campyfan 12:00pm News at Noon 12:30pm Cegin Twts 12:45pm Pingu 12:50pm Tomos A'i Ffrindiau 1:00pm Meees! 1:15pm Science Scams 1:25pm Time Team 2:25pm Deal or No Deal 3:10pm Countdown 4:00pm Martin Mellten 4:30pm Y Fet a Fi 4:50pm Ffeil 5:00pm Richard and Judy 6:00pm The Simpsons 6:30pm Stwffio 7:00pm Wedi 7 7:30pm Newyddion 8:00pm Pobol y Cwm 8:25pm Gwragedd Rygbi 9:00pm Pawb a'i Farn 10:00pm Jamie's Chef 11:00pm Shameless 12:00am Strictly Baby

20% student discount on all pizzas and starters Every second pizza half price Call in store for our take away deals

62 Crwys Road, Cardiff,CF24 4NN

02920 229977

44 gairrhydd

FRIDAY

FEBRUARY.05.2007 TV@gairrhydd.COM

Breakfast

Breakfast

BBC1 6.00am

BBC1 6.00am

6:00am Breakfast 9:15am Wanted Down Under 10:00am Homes under the Hammer 11:00am To Buy or Not to Buy 11:45am Car Booty 12:15pm Bargain Hunt 1:00pm BBC News; Weather 1:30pm Regional News and Weather 1:40pm Neighbours 2:05pm Doctors 2:35pm Diagnosis Murder 3:20pm BBC News; Weather; Regional News 3:25pm CBBC:ChuckleVision 3:40pm What's New Scooby Doo? 4:00pm Raven 4:30pm Best of Friends 5:00pm Gina's Laughing Gear 5:30pm Newsround 5:35pm Neighbours 6:00pm BBC News and Weather 6:30pm Wales Today; Weather 7:00pm A Question of Sport 7:30pm X-Ray So I finished this page and once again it of course deleted itself for no reason at all. I know you’re meant to save as you go but this is absolutely ridculous the amount of times my pages have deleted themselves or have gone missing. Especially as I have missed a lecture to do this so I can judge and help out with the LMS battle of the bands competition. I did not have an hour and a half to waste, which I have just done. I really really really feel a lot of anger right now. So this page will be full of rage and no mention of midgets.

8:00pm EastEnders 8:30pm After You've Gone 9:00pm Lilies 10:00pm BBC News; Regional News; Weather 10:35pm Comedy Connections 11:15pm Unlawful Entry 1:10am Joins BBC News 24

6:00am CBeebies:Fimbles 6:20am The Story Makers 6:40am Balamory 7:00am CBBC:Tom 7:25am Newsround 7:30am Even Stevens 7:50am Batfink 8:00am Suspect 8:30am CBeebies:Bob the Builder: Project Build It 8:40am Tweenies 9:00am Doodle Do 9:20am Ethelbert the Tiger 9:30am Something Special 9:45am Come Outside 10:00am Boogie Beebies 10:15am Jackanory Junior 10:30am Razzledazzle 10:50am Words and Pictures 11:00am Watch 11:20am BBC Active Citizenship 11:40am Around Scotland 12:00pm The Daily Politics 12:30pm Working Lunch 1:30pm Bowls: Welsh International Singles Championships 5:15pm Weakest Link I am meant to be in Youth and Media this week, my very first lecture, new start and that.

Instead I am here having my work implode on itself. I hope your christmas sucked. Like sour smarties.

6:00pm Safari School 6:30pm Masterchef Goes Large 7:00pm Coming To Your Screen: Microsoft's New Vista 7:30pm Jimmy's Diaries 8:00pm A New Year at Kew 8:30pm Grow Your Own Veg! 9:00pm The Last Duel 9:50pm Coast: East Coast - The Wash 10:00pm Room 101 10:30pm Newsnight 11:00pm Newsnight Review 11:35pm Bowls: Welsh International Open Highlights 12:25am Cricket - One-Day International

7:00pm Doctor Who Confidential I think perhaps I hate this computer so much I may go and find Mr Mac and force him to write a 20,000 word essay on the thimble and then delete it. Then perhaps force him to put his cock in the cd drive and close it. Maybe that would be too far, and I would end up perhaps in jail but I think it it well deserved. 7:30pm Doctor Who 8:15pm Doctor Who 9:00pm Little Britain 9:30pm Man Stroke Woman 10:00pm EastEnders 10:30pm Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 11:00pm Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 11:30pm Pulling as lightly as me finishing these pages before eight. Which is very unlikely.

12:25am Family Guy 12:45am Family Guy 1:10am Man Stroke Woman 1:40am Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 2:10am Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 2:40am Brand New Spendaholics

7:00pm Medical Mavericks 8:00pm The World 8:30pm Tchaikovsky: Masterclasses with the Royal Ballet Ballet was my favourite childhood phase, along with horseriding, drama club, playing the flute and the piano.

The one thing they have in common is the fact that I completely sucked and failed miserably at all of them. Not before I got a flute, piano and horse.

Not really. I never got a flute. 9:00pm Soul Britannia 10:00pm Marcus Brigstocke's Trophy People 10:30pm Paul Merton's Silent Clowns 11:30pm The Avengers 12:20am Soul Britannia 1:20am Tchaikovsky: Masterclasses with the Royal Ballet 1.50am Paul Merton's Silent Clowns 2:50am Soul Britannia Some more tips about travelling in Wales. Apparently in Swansea there is also a castle. There is a bloody castle in every single part of Wales. You love the castles.

Perhaps too much.

20% student discount on all pizzas and starters Every second pizza half price Call in store for our take away deals

Breakfast

Breakfast

Breakfast

BBC1 6.00am

BBC1 6.00am

BBC1 6.00am

6:00am GMTV Newshour 6:58am GMTV Today 8:35am Entertainment Today 9:25am The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:30am This Morning 12:00pm This Morning: Dancing on Ice Special 12:30pm Loose Women Everyone is debating about Jade Goody, but who cares? I think the more attention we pay her the more likely it is she will be hanging around saying stupid things.

How about we stop feeding her fame by completely ignoring her and hope that some freak yachting accident causes her to loose the ability to actually talk, and she then goes to live in a cave in outer Mongolia. 1:30pm ITV Lunchtime News; Weather 2:00pm 60 Minute Makeover 3:00pm Daily Cooks 4:00pm Midsomer Murders 6:00pm Wales Tonight God I’m hungry, I want some sushi, and some noodles and perhaps some kind of genie who does all my work for me, tidies my room and makes sure I always have filters for my fags. It’s important to have all your smoking accesories around you at all times, and I quite often leave the house without a lighter, rizlas or tobacco.

6:30pm ITV Evening News; Weather 7:00pm Emmerdale 7:30pm Coronation Street 8:00pm Tonight with Trevor McDonald 8:30pm A Touch of Frost 10:30pm ITV News; Weather 11:00pm Fit for a Change 11:30pm Never to be Forgotten 12:05am ITV Play: Make Your Play 4:10am 60 Minute Makeover

6:05am Making It 6:10am The Hoobs 6:35am The Hoobs 7:00am Freshly Squeezed 7:30am Friends 8:00am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:30am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:55am Frasier 9:30am The Deadly Knowledge Show 10:00am The Hustlers 10:30am The Market 11:00am Trouble Online 11:30am My Crazy Life 12:00pm News at Noon 12:30pm Ed 1:25pm Science Scams 1:35pm 3 Minute Wonder 1:45pm Night Train to Munich 3:30pm Countdown 4:15pm Deal or No Deal 5:00pm Richard and Judy 6:00pm The Simpsons 6:30pm Hollyoaks 7:00pm Channel 4 News 7:35pm The Insider: Size Zero - Who is to Blame? I personally blame Jade Goody for size zero, as well as racial tension and the fact that Lucky Charms no longer exist. Stupid bitch.

8:00pm A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 9:00pm Ugly Betty Addicitve really, like crack but less moreish. I hope Betty ends up with that fit guy from the third floor rather then Walter “I look like a 13 year old boy”. I personally think Betty will end up with her boss.

10:00pm Friday Night Project 11:00pm Under Siege 1:00am 4 Music:The Album Chart Show: The Brits Special 1:30am 4 Music:JD Set 1:50am Shin Gi Tai 1:55am 3 Minute Wonder 2:00am The Hi-Lo Country 3:55am Truel 4:10am Help Me Help My Child 5:10am Toby the Square Boy 5:15am Countdown

6:00am Tickle, Patch and Friends 6:25am Old Bear Stories 6:35am Bird Bath 6:45am Hi-5 7:20am Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Friends 7:35am The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 7:45am Make Way for Noddy 8:00am Fifi and the Flowertots 8:15am Peppa Pig 8:25am Thomas & Friends 8:35am Sailor Sid 8:40am Roobarb and Custard Too 8:50am Mio Mao 9:00am The Wright Stuff 10:30am Trisha Goddard 11:30am five news 12:00pm Home and Away 12:30pm BrainTeaser 1:30pm A Stranger to Love 3:20pm five news update 3:25pm Though None Go with Me 5:30pm five news 6:00pm Home and Away 6:30pm Out of Practice 7:00pm five news 7:30pm Wild Events 8:00pm Nick Baker's Weird Creatures I have always wondered what it would be like to have a small penguin, which you could fit in your bag, not like a baby penguin but one maybe full of growth-stunting hormones. Everyone knows that small things are cuter.

Apart from penises obviously.

9:00pm NCIS 10:00pm Law and Order: Criminal Intent 11:00pm Banged Up Abroad 12:00am Prison Break 1:00am Quiz Call 5:35am Wildlife SOS Did you know Kidwelly is a sleeply little town dominated by a imposing castle. There is also an industrial museum, and on thursdays a parade of nuns come out and mud wrestle. Perhaps a lie.

6:00am Fun Song Factory 6:10am Mopatop's Shop 6:25am Engie Benjy 6:35am Pocoyo 6:50am Fun Song Factory 7:00am Winx Club 7:25am Transformers Cybertron 7:55am Yu-GiOh! GX 8:25am Biker Mice from Mars 8:55am Sonic Underground 9:25am Coronation Street 9:55am Emmerdale 10:20am The Oprah Winfrey Show 11:10am Judge Judy 12:30pm Coronation Street 1:00pm Emmerdale 1:30pm The Jeremy Kyle Show 3:40pm The Ricki Lake Show 4:30pm Sally Jessy Raphael 5:15pm Airline USA 5:45pm Judge Judy 7:00pm The New Adventures of Superman 8:00pm ITV at the Movies 8:30pm American Idol 9:30pm American Idol 10:30pm Haunted Homes 11:30pm Coronation Street 12:00am Trinny and Susannah Undress 1:00am ITV Play: Make Your Play 4:00am Teleshopping

6:00am E4 Music: Uninterrupted 7:00am E4 Music: Uninterrupted 7:30am Wake Up with Joshua Jackson 8:00am Wake Up with Joshua Jackson 8:30am Whatever... You Want 9:00am Whatever... You Want 10:00am Whatever... You Want 11:00am Nothing but 2005 12:00pm E4 Music: Uninterrupted 1:00pm Freshly Squeezed Extra 2:00pm Switched 2:30pm One Tree Hill 3:30pm Smallville: Superman the Early Years 4:30pm Hollyoaks 5:00pm Friends 5:35pm Friends 6:05pm Scrubs 6:30pm Scrubs 7:00pm Hollyoaks 7:30pm The War at Home 8:00pm Friends 8:30pm Friends 9:00pm My Name Is Earl 9:30pm Peep Show 10:00pm Jeepers Creepers 11:50pm Scrubs 12:20am Scrubs 12:45am Peep Show 1:20am Jeepers Creepers 3:00am Desperate Housewives 3:40am Smallville: Superman the Early Years 4:40am Switched 5:25am Switched

6:10am The Hoobs 6:35am The Hoobs 7:00am Freshly Squeezed 7:30am Friends 8:00am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:30am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:55am Frasier 9:30am The Deadly Knowledge Show 10:00am The Hustlers 10:30am The Market 11:00am Trouble Online 11:30am My Crazy Life 12:00pm News at Noon 12:30pm Planed Plant Bach:Cegin Twts 12:50pm Planed Plant 12:55pm Planed Plant Bach:Penblwydd Pwy 1:15pm 3 Minute Wonder 1:20pm Britain's Worst Weather 2:25pm Deal or No Deal 3:10pm Countdown 4:50pm 5:00pm Richard and Judy 6:00pm The Simpsons 6:30pm Uned 5 7:30pm Newyddion 8:00pm Pobol y Cwm 8:25pm Tipit 9:00pm Jonathan 10:00pm Gwragedd Rygbi 10:30pm Caerdydd 11:30pm Ugly Betty 12:30am Friday Night Project 1:30am Live from Abbey Road 2:25am Kung Pow: Enter the Fist 3:50am Freesports on 4

62 Crwys Road, Cardiff, CF24 4NN

02920 229977

gairrhydd

45

SATURDAY

FEBRUARY.05.2007 TV@gairrhydd.COM

Casualty

The Culture Show

Pokerface

Its All About Love

Any Given Sunday

BBC1 8.35pm

BBC2 7.30pm

ITV1 8.45pm

Channel 4 3.20am

five 11.25pm

6:00am Breakfast 10:00am Saturday Kitchen 11:30am Bill's Food 12:00pm BBC News; Weather 12:10pm Football Focus 1:00pm Six Nations Rugby 5:25pm Final Score 5:40pm BBC News; Regional News; Weather 5:55pm When Will I Be Famous?

7:15pm Shrek 8:35pm Casualty I feel like a fucking casualty. I’m starving. I’ve only eaten a bacon sandwich today and that was about 6 hours ago. Oh no, I also had a packet of ready salted crisps. I think I might get a Subway on the way home.

I’m getting addicted to them. Last week I had 2 Macdonalds’, 1 KFC, 1 Burger King, several portions of chips and 2 Subways. That’s probably the worst I’ve eaten for about two years. In first year we lived pretty much next to Maccies by big Tesco and we had vouchers so we had a Macdonalds everyday for about 2 weeks. We weren’t satiated by one meal, oh no, we got TWO meals. Each. Yeah you heard. We were like the fucking MacDaddies. This week I’ve tried to eat healthily. Yesterday I might have had 5 portions of veg for the first time ever. I do like vegetables, but it’s easier to buy some chips or a baguette as I’m sure you will agree. It’s more expensive, but I can’t afford to spend time cooking.

9:25pm The National Lottery: 1 vs 100 10:10pm BBC News; Weather 10:30pm Match of the Day 11:50pm The Replacement Killers

6:00am CBeebies:Balamory 6:20am Tweenies 6:40am Big Cook Little Cook 7:00am CBBC:Batfink 7:10am Pinky and the Brain 7:30am Yvon of the Yukon 7:50am BB3B 8:15am Zombie Hotel 8:40am What's New Scooby-Doo? 9:00am CBBC:Tracy Beaker's the Movie of Me 10:15am CBBC's Big Red Nose 11:45am Sportsround 12:00pm See Hear 12:45pm The Sky at Night It’s good that this is on just after midday. Look out your window and it’ll be nice and light which makes it easy to look at stars and recognise the shapes. It’s hard enough to do that at night, they all look the fucking same to me. 1:25pm Coast: Cuttlefish and Pompey 1:35pm Film 2007 with Jonathan Ross 2:05pm Churchill's Bodyguard Was a wuss. 2:50pm Monk 3:35pm Sands of the Kalahari 5:25pm What the Papers Say 5:35pm TOTP 2 6:10pm Outtake TV 6:40pm Meerkat Manor 7:05pm Meerkat Manor Twice in a row? Aren’t we the lucky ones?

7:30pm The Culture Show Culture Schmulture. Give me fish and chips and shut the fuck up.

8:20pm Wild Caribbean 9:10pm Dragons' Den 10:10pm Comedy Map of Britain 11:10pm Never Mind the Buzzcocks 11:40pm Mock the Week 12:10am Room 101 12:40am Have I Got Old News for You 1:10am The Culture Show 2:00am Langrishe Go Down

6:00am Fun Song Factory 6:10am Engie Benjy 6:20am Pocoyo 6:35am Dora the Explorer 6:55am Mickey Mouse Clubhouse 7:25am Lilo and Stitch 7:50am SpongeBob SquarePants 8:10am Emperor's New School 8:35am Kim Possible 9:10am SpongeBob SquarePants 9:25am CITV:Horrid Henry 9:40am CITV:Grizzly Tales For Gruesome Kids 9:50am CITV:Tricky Quickies 9:55am CITV:Scratch 'n' Sniff's Den Of Doom 10:25am CITV:Tricky Quickies 10:30am Dickinson's Real Deal 11:30am Saturday Cooks Live 1:00pm ITV News; Weather 1:05pm ITV Wales News and Weather 1:10pm The BRITs Are Coming 1:40pm American Idol 2:40pm Murder on the Orient Express 4:55pm ITV Wales News and Weather 5:10pm ITV News; Sports Results; Weather 5:25pm New You've Been Framed!

5:55pm Harry Hill's TV Burp 6:25pm Dancing on Ice 7:45pm Primeval 8:45pm PokerFace 9:45pm Dancing on Ice - The Skate Off 10:15pm Al Murray's Happy Hour If only this was Bill Murray; anything with Bill Murray in is bound to be quality and that is a scientific fact. If you don’t believe me you should watch Ghostbusters. 11:15pm ITV News; Weather 11:30pm City Slickers 1:30am ITV Play: Make Your Play 4:25am Don't Move, Improve 5:00am ITV Nightscreen 5:30am ITV Early

6:00am The Cubeez 6:10am The Hoobs 6:35am The Hoobs 7:00am Goalissimo! 8:00am The Morning Line 8:55am T4:Homemade 9:30am T4:Goal 2: T4 Movie Special 10:00am T4:Friends 10:30am T4:Popworld 11:20am T4:Friends 11:50am T4:Shipwrecked 2007: The Hut Cam Diaries 12:20pm T4:Shipwrecked 2007: Battle of the Islands Cool!

Shipwrecked is on. Last summer me and Haz got addicted to this. We watched it every morning with our breakfast. Them were the days.

1:25pm T4:Homemade 2:00pm Channel 4 Racing from Newbury and Warwick 4:20pm Location, Location, Location 4:50pm Deal or No Deal 5:35pm The Search 6:40pm Channel 4 News 7:10pm The Channel 4 Political Awards 2007 8:10pm Britain's Worst Weather Rain?

Wind? Yeah? Yeah. What else do we get? Ooh there was a tornado in London. Well there wasn’t an earthquake in Winsford, that would have livened things up a bit wouldn’t it. Let’s face it, our ‘worst weather’ pales in comparison to the weather pretty much anywhere else in the world. Thank God. Last night I learnt it’s warm here cos of the North Atlantic Drift. I didn’t listen in geography.

9:10pm The Gift 11:15pm 8mm 1:35am Drugstore Cowboy 3:20am It's All about Love 5:10am The Invasion 5:25am Countdown

6:00am Sunrise 6:55am Franklin 7:25am Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Friends 7:45am Make Way for Noddy 8:00am Harry and His Bucket Full of Dinosaurs 8:15am Harry and His Bucket Full of Dinosaurs That must be a big bucket Harry’s got himself there.

If I had a bucket that big I don’t know what I’d do with it. A hole in that bucket would certainly cause some problems. What would you mend it with?

Corrugated iron? 8:30am Gerald McBoing Boing 9:05am Jane and the Dragon 9:35am Don't Blame the Koalas 10:05am Hercules: Legendary Journeys 11:05am Xcalibur 11:40am Built for the Kill 12:10pm The Kid from Texas 1:35pm Columbo: The Greenhouse Jungle 3:10pm Camelot 6:25pm Guns of the Magnificent Seven 8:20pm five news and sport 8:30pm NCIS 9:25pm CSI:NY 10:25pm Law and Order 11:25pm Any Given Sunday 2:20am Quiz Call 5:35am Wildlife SOS He almost walked into a wall. Oh man, she was a sight to see. And at the party down the hall, he said, "you are the highest apple in the tree". Out the window, in the harbour he saw a little ship. The moon was worn just slightly on the right. And they slow danced so the needle wouldn't skip, until the room was filled with light. And I remember you, and I remember me. The sunshine walking inside you, And the man you could see in me.

7:00pm Top Gear 8:00pm The Real Hustle 8:30pm The Real Hustle 9:00pm Little Britain 9:30pm Beverly Hills Cop II 11:05pm Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 11:35pm Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 12:05am Thieves Like Us 12:35am Comedy Specials: Bash 1:05am Comedy Shuffle 1:35am Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 2:05am Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 2:35am The Real Hustle 3:05am The Real Hustle So I remember me, and I remember you. So many beautiful days in a row now, and the nights were perfect too. Hand in hand down a waterslide in Chattanooga. They did not hide from love you see. A winter's plane flight to Aruba, where he threw a boombox into the sea. One day they were cutting flowers for something to do, on the bank of the road 'neath the cotton woods. And he turned to her to ask if she'd marry him...

7:00pm Tchaikovsky: Queen of Spades 9:50pm The Man Who Copied 11:50pm Charlie Brooker's Screenwipe 12:20am Soul Brittania on Later... 1:20am Soul Britannia 2:20am Discovering Tchaikovsky 3:20am Discovering Tchaikovsky ... When a runaway truck hit him where he stood.

And I remember me, and I remember me. A blackhawk nailed to the sky and the tape is from the trees. Everybody said she needed to move on, that he was all but lost, so deep was his coma. When he finally came to the girl he loved was long gone, she'd married a banker and gone to Oklahoma. He bought a little land with the money from the settlement, and even bought the truck that had hit him that day.

He touched the part where the metal was bent, and if you were there you wouldn't hear him say, I remember her, and I remember him, I remember them.

6:00am Ni Ni's Treehouse 7:20am MacDonald's Farm 8:25am Mags and Mo 8:30am Bug Alert! 8:50am The Wheels on the Bus 9:00am Teleshopping 9:25am Emmerdale Omnibus 12:10pm Coronation Street Omnibus 2:35pm Holiday Showdown 3:40pm Nanny 911 4:35pm Planet's Funniest Animals 5:00pm Movies Now 5:10pm ITV at the Movies 5:45pm The New Adventures of Superman 6:45pm The New Adventures of Superman 7:45pm Nanny 911 8:45pm Dancing on Ice: Defrosted 9:45pm Harry Hill's TV Burp 10:15pm Dancing on Ice: Defrosted Results 10:45pm The Mummy 1:10am Dancing on Ice 2:30am Dancing on Ice - The Skate Off 3:00am Dancing on Ice: Defrosted Results 3:30am ITV Play: Make Your Play 3:40am Emmerdale Omnibus

6:00am E4 Music: Uninterrupted 7:00am E4 Music: Uninterrupted 8:00am E4 Music's A List 9:00am Our Showbiz Mates 10:00am Westlife's Ultimate Love Songs 11:00am Westlife's Ultimate Love Songs 12:00pm Westlife's Ultimate Love Songs 1:00pm Westlife's Ultimate Love Songs 2:00pm The Album Chart Show: The Brits Special 2:30pm Hollyoaks Omnibus 5:00pm Friends 5:30pm Friends 6:00pm The Simple Life: Interns 6:25pm Shipwrecked 2007: The Hut Cam Diaries 6:55pm Shipwrecked 2007: Battle of the Islands 8:00pm Friends 8:30pm Friends 9:00pm The 100 Greatest Tearjerkers 1:10am X-Rated: The Sex Films They Tried to Ban 2:40am Shipwrecked 2007: The Hut Cam Diaries 3:05am Shipwrecked 2007: Battle of the Islands 4:05am The Simple Life: Interns 4:25am Switched 4:45am Switched 5:10am Switched

6:10am The Hoobs 6:35am The Hoobs 7:00am Goalissimo! 8:00am The Morning Line 8:55am Homemade 9:20am Friends 9:50am Dreamgirls: T4 Movie Special 10:20am Goal 2: T4 Movie Special 10:50am Friends 11:20am Friends 11:45am Shipwrecked 2007: The Hut Cam Diaries 12:15pm The OC 1:10pm Beauty and the Geek 2:00pm Channel 4 Racing from Newbury and Warwick 3:00pm Y Clwb Rygbi Rhyngwladol: Pencampwriaeth y Chwe Gwlad 2007 5:40pm Deal or No Deal 6:25pm Location, Location, Location 6:55pm Newyddion a Chwaraeon 7:10pm Y Clwb Pel-Droed 7:45pm Hwyl y Noson Lawen 8:15pm Codi Canu 9:00pm Tywysogion 10:00pm The Wedding Planner 11:55pm Under Siege 1:45am The Channel 4 Political Awards 2007 2:40am A Swinging Murder 3:35am KOTV I remember then, I'm just remembering, I'm just remembering, I'm just remembering.

20% student discount on all pizzas and starters Every second pizza half price Call in store for our take away deals

62 Crwys Road, Cardiff, CF24 4NN

02920 229977

46 gairrhydd

SUNDAY

FEBRUARY.05.2007 TV@gairrhydd.COM

The OC Channel 4 2.50pm

The Fiend

Smile

House of Mouse

BBC2 2.35am

BBC2 7.30am

ITV1 7.25am

6:00am Breakfast 7:35am Match of the Day 9:00am Sunday AM 10:00am Heaven and Earth with Gloria Hunniford 11:00am Countryfile 12:00pm The Politics Show 1:05pm EastEnders 2:25pm Six Nations Rugby 5:00pm EastEnders 5:30pm Wildlife on One 5:40pm Songs of Praise 6:15pm When Love Comes to Town 6:45pm Antiques Roadshow 7:35pm BBC News; Regional News; Weather 8:00pm Rough Diamond 9:00pm The Orange British Academy Film Awards 2007 10:00pm BBC News; Regional News; Weather 10:20pm The Orange British Academy Film Awards 2007 I will now inform you of who is nominated and who I personally feel will win the Oscars, because my opinion is incredibly relevant. First up Best Picture. Babel (a film with four different stories in, three of them rubbish and boring. This is the kind of film which wants to tug your heart strings instead it makes you silently wish for the main characters to die. In pain. ) The Queen, Little Miss Sunshine, The Departed and Letters from Iwa Juma. I havent seen the rest, but The Queen is a British film so go on, it can win.11:20pm The Hawk 12:50am Sign Zone:Can Gerry Robinson Fix the NHS? 1:50am Sign Zone:Holby City 2:50am Sign Zone:Wanted Down Under 3:35am Joins BBC News 24 Next up, best actor, the nominees are Leo, Ryan Gosling in something

6:00am CBeebies:Balamory 6:20am Tweenies 6:40am Big Cook Little Cook 7:00am CBBC:Batfink 7:10am The Batman 7:30am Smile 10:00am Something for the Weekend 11:30am A Diagnosis of Murder 1:00pm Athletics 3:00pm White Fang 4:55pm Ski Sunday 5:15pm As BBC2 5:30pm Scrum V 5:45pm Wild Florida 6:10pm Showdown in Elk Town 6:20pm Natural World 7:10pm Meerkat Manor 7:35pm Meerkat Manor 8:00pm Top Gear 9:00pm The Verdict 10:00pm As BBC2 2:35am The Fiend Helen Mirren will win anyway. However Kate Winslet has been nominated about a thousand times and perhaps deserves something. Like a Woolworths voucher. Or a hug from a very fat man. I personally feel Pan’s Lab should have been nominated for more, I have only shortened that name because I can’t spell the entire word.

One day I will learn how to spell hard words but for now, I have more pressing things to concentrate on. For example I got an ipod for xmas and it has been demanding a lot of my time. It is both a triumph and a let down, the triumph being the fact I enjoy walking places now, and I can laugh myself to sleep listening to Blackadder on audiobook. The let down is that it wont let me “borrow” music from other computers and the headphones died on the second day.

6:00am The Sunday Programme 7:25am House of Mouse 7:50am Totally Spies! 8:15am Yin Yang Yo! 8:30am Oban 9:10am SpongeBob SquarePants 9:25am CITV:Horrid Henry 9:35am CITV:Feodor 9:45am CITV:Curious George This week my flatmates George is curious about his choud. 9:55am CITV:Pocoyo 10:05am CITV:Jim Jam and Sunny 10:20am CITV:Jim Jam and Sunny 10:30am Soccer Sunday 11:30am The Sunday Edition with Andrew Rawnsley and Andrea Catherwood 12:30pm ITV Wales News and Weather 12:35pm The Crocodile Hunter Diaries 1:40pm American Idol 2:40pm Dancing on Ice 4:00pm Dancing on Ice - The Skate Off 4:30pm Primeval 5:30pm 12 Books That Changed the World Hmmm just a mad stab in the dark but is one of them the Bible? How fucking predictable. TV Neil feels that the FHM joke book, which currently resides in his toilet is a life changing read which has a joke for every occasion, yes even funerals.

6:30pm ITV Wales News and Weather 6:45pm ITV News; Weather 7:00pm Emmerdale 7:30pm Coronation Street 8:00pm Wild at Heart 9:00pm Foyle's War 10:30pm ITV News; Weather 10:45pm The South Bank Show 11:45pm The Moral of the Story 12:15am Cathedral 1:05am ITV Play: The Mint 4:05am Jeremy Kyle Show 5:00am ITV Nightscreen

6:10am The Hoobs 6:35am The Hoobs 7:00am Trans World Sport 8:00am Bauhaus World Bobsleigh Championships 2007 8:30am Freesports on 4 9:00am T4:Popworld 9:50am T4:Friends 10:15am T4:Hollyoaks 12:45pm T4:Shipwrecked 2007: The Hut Cam Diaries Can we please have some fat women in this? 1:20pm T4:Friends 1:50pm T4:Beauty and the Geek 2:50pm T4:The OC 3:50pm T4:Ugly Betty 4:50pm Deal or No Deal 5:35pm Time Team 6:35pm Shipwrecked 2007: Battle of the Islands 7:40pm Channel 4 News 8:00pm The Day after Tomorrow Right, fast forward this to the parts where Jake is in it, watch that, perhaps pause it and lick the TV screen then turn it off, go upstairs, light some scented candles and make gentle love to yourself.

10:20pm Sexy Beast 11:55pm 4 Music:Coldplay: Live in Concert 1:00am 4Music Presents...

1:30am 4 Music:Download Festival Headliners this year include Pearl Jam, Linkin Park and of course My Chemical Romance who I am seeing in concert soon. I am not ashamed. They rhyme good. 2006 2:30am 4 Music:The Album Chart Show: The Brits Special 2:55am One Minute Past Midnight is when the ghosts come out apparently.3:10am The Perfect Home 5:10am My Eden 5:15am Home Sweet Home 5:25am Countdown

6:00am Tickle, Patch and Friends 6:25am Old Bear Stories 6:35am Sailor Sid 6:40am Bird Bath 6:50am Franklin 7:15am Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Friends 7:30am The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 7:45am Make Way for Noddy 8:00am Harry and His Bucket Full of Dinosaurs 8:15am Harry and His Bucket Full of Dinosaurs 8:30am Gerald McBoing Boing 9:00am Jane and the Dragon 9:30am What Makes Me Happy 9:45am Demolition Dad 10:00am Round the Twist 10:30am Hospital 11:00am Snobs 11:35am RAD: The Groms Tour the Baltics 12:05pm Arthur's Trip to India 12:35pm Revelations 1:05pm five news update 1:10pm Divine Designs 1:45pm Nigel Marven's Creepy Crawlies 2:50pm Columbo: The ByeBye Sky High IQ Murder Case 4:25pm The Gypsy Warriors 5:55pm five news and sport 6:10pm Jumanji 8:00pm Cocktail 10:00pm Tequila Sunrise 1 2:15am Disorderly Conduct 1:15am Natural Born Racers 1:45am The Raid 2:10am Rolex Grand Am 3:00am One on One with John Barnes 3:20am Adventure Triathlon 3:45am A1 Grand Prix 4:40am UEFA Cup Football: Newcastle United v Celta Vigo You know what is much better then Channel 5? Anything or MTV. It has a series of spectacular programs showcasing the stupiest Americans. Am I the new Jade Goody? I jest of course, my cat is American.

7:00pm Brand New Spendaholics 8:00pm New Wedding Stories 9:00pm Fat Men Can't Hunt 10:00pm Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 10:30pm Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 11:00pm New Wedding Stories 11:55pm Fat Men Can't Hunt 12:55am Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 1:25am Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps 1:55am Torchwood 2:40am New Wedding Stories I havent heard of, Peter O Toole in Venus, Will Smith in a film with his son and Forest Whitaker as some kind of evil dictator with the guy who played Mr Tumnus in Narnia. I personally feel that Ryan Gosling’s finest work was in The Notebook, and he is very very hot so he definetely deserves to win.

Best Actress: Helen Mirren, Penelope Cruz, Judi Dench, Meryl Streep and Kate Winslet. Well, since I have once again seen none of these films I cant comment but it doesnt matter

7:00pm Primate Primers 7:10pm Trouble at the Top 8:00pm The Way We Went Wild 9:00pm Travels with a Tangerine 10:00pm The Great British Holiday 11:00pm Summer Holiday 12:45am Travels with a Tangerine 1:45am Holidays in the Danger Zone 3:15am Holidays in the Danger Zone: Rivers However, it is better then the walkman or cd player which I have previously owned. I also got a music system which can be likened to some kind of transformer perhaps Beta Ulpha or....I clearly dont know the names of transformers. Anyway It is a vinyl/tape/cd and radio player and has been made in the style of an old fashioned thing. So it not only satisfies my elf like ears it also is old looking enough to create the illusion that I have not just jumped on some trendy band wagon now that vinyl is once again cool. I bought my friend some Cliff Richard on vinyl.

6:00am Ni Ni's Treehouse 6:25am Fun Song Factory 6:35am Mopatop's Shop 6:45am Engie Benjy 6:55am Pocoyo 7:15am Fun Song Factory 7:25am House of Mouse 7:50am Totally Spies!

8:15am Yin Yang Yo! 8:30am Oban 9:10am Spongebob Squarepants 9:25am Music and Lyrics: World Premiere Special 9:55am The New Adventures of Superman 10:55am Harry Hill's TV Burp 11:25am Emmerdale Omnibus 2:15pm The Mummy 4:35pm Coronation Street Omnibus 7:00pm American Idol 8:00pm American Idol 9:00pm Supernatural 10:00pm Kelly Osbourne: Turning Japanese 11:00pm Entourage 11:35pm The Office: An American Work Place 12:05am Coronation Street 12:35am Kelly Osbourne: Turning Japanese 1:35am ITV Play: The Mint 4:00am Teleshopping

6:00am E4 Music: Uninterrupted 7:00am E4 Music: Uninterrupted 8:00am E4 Music's A List 9:00am Our Showbiz Mates 10:00am Westlife's Hotties Chart 11:00am Westlife's Hotties Chart 12:00pm Westlife's Hotties Chart 1:00pm Westlife's Hotties Chart 2:00pm Popworld 2:55pm Playing it Straight 4:00pm Friends 4:30pm Friends 5:00pm Homemade 5:30pm Homemade 6:00pm The OC 7:00pm Friends 7:30pm Friends 8:00pm Ugly Betty 9:00pm ER 10:00pm Desperate Housewives 11:00pm Skins 12:00am My Name Is Earl 12:30am Homemade 1:05am Homemade 1:35am Playing it Straight 2:35am Popworld 3:20am Skins 4:20am My Big Fat Obnoxious Boss 5:00am Switched 5:25am Switched New Years resolutions wise I have done pretty well, been going to gym four times a week, and I resolved to not give up smoking which has worked out well.

6:10am The Hoobs 6:35am The Hoobs 7:00am Trans World Sport 8:00am Bauhaus World Bobsleigh Championships 2007 8:30am Freesports on 4 9:00am Hollyoaks Omnibus 11:30am Shipwrecked 2007: Battle of the Islands 12:30pm Yr Wythnos 1:00pm Maniffesto 1:30pm Rownd a Rownd 2:00pm Rownd a Rownd 2:30pm Night Train to Munich 4:15pm A Place in the Sun Revisited 4:45pm Y Ty Cymreig 5:15pm Newyddion 5:20pm Pobol y Cwm Omnibws 7:15pm Codi Canu 8:00pm Dechrau Canu Dechrau Canmol 8:30pm Twrio 9:00pm Cowbois ac Injans 10:00pm Newyddion 10:15pm The Day after Tomorrow 12:35am The Enforcer 2:15am Black Widow 4:05am The Insider: Size Zero - Who is to Blame? For example you have My Super Sweet 16, or the amazing Date My Mom, where the contestant gets five minutes to try and shag their girlfriends’ mum.

20% student discount on all pizzas and starters Every second pizza half price Call in store for our take away deals

Old Bear Stories five 6.00am

62 Crwys Road, Cardiff, CF24 4NN

02920 229977