Gair Rhydd - Issue 844

gair rhydd

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ISSUE 844 MAY 28 2007

CARDIFF’S STUDENT WEEKLY free word - EST. 1972

Edification renames the degree classifications

(we’ll have a Geoff please...)

Page 9

ETERNALLY MISSED

Bar Med: the feud continues Lee Macaulay Deputy News Editor THE FUTURE of MedClub is still in doubt after the ‘open forum meeting’ to consult with students about changes to the space attracted less than 30 students.

However, students have accused the University of deterring interest in the meeting by holding it in the middle of the stressful exam period and making students ‘book’ a slot to be able to discuss the planned redevelopment.

One student said that: “This is another example of the University not paying attention to the wishes of the healthcare students on Heath Campus.

PHOTO: JAMES PEROU

Continued on page four

Cricket make AU history

Floral tributes adorn Music School after sudden death of third-year Rachel Helen Thompson News Editor A THIRD-YEAR Cardiff student has died unexpectedly, after being rushed to hospital two weeks ago.

Music student Rachel Copp was due to graduate this summer, but died on Wednesday May 16 following a short illness.

The 21-year-old pianist is remembered by her friends and peers as a cheerful person who was always ‘pos-

itive and vibrant’.

Rachel had been unwell for a few weeks, and was taken into the Heath Hospital on Friday May 11.

On the following Sunday, she underwent surgery to remove part of a brain tumour, but unfortunately never recovered.

Her parents and younger brother and sister were with her when she died.

Her long-term boyfriend has travelled home from Cardiff since the loss,

and friends and acquaintances remaining in Cardiff are said to be ‘shocked and sad’.

Laura Foster, a fellow music student and close friend of Rachel’s, said: “She was a beautiful person who we loved to be around. She was always smiling and a good friend to many music students.”

The statue outside the School of Music on Corbett Road has been covered with flowers in Rachel’s memory, and many have continued to use her

Facebook wall to leave tributes and commemorations.

Most emphasise Rachel’s bright personality, with one friend commenting: “You are not someone who will be Continued on page five

BACK PAGE

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NEWS

MAY.28.2007 NEWS@gairrhydd.COM

This week...

At

a p.6 glance

Looks at vandalism and the media’s handling of missing Madeleine McCann

MAY 28 2007 News Editorial & Opinion Column Letters Politics Science/Environment Jobs & Money Health Media Television Problem Page Five Minute Fun Grab Listings Sport

Opinion

1 7 9 10 11 12 13 15 16 17 19 21 23 24 26

EDITOR Perri Lewis DEPUTY EDITOR Sophie Robehmed ASSISTANT TO THE EDITOR Elaine Morgan CREATIVE EDITOR Graeme Porteous NEWS Adam Millward, Helen Thompson, Jo Dingle, Katie Kennedy POLITICS Andy Rennison EDITORIAL AND OPINION Chris Croissant, Huw Davies SPORT Dave Menon, George Pawley LISTINGS Jenna Harris, Rosaria Sgueglia TELEVISION TV Fran, TV Jazz, TV Kyle, TV Ben LETTERS Rachel Clare GRAB Kayleigh Excell, Lisa Hocken TAF-OD Huw Pritchard SCIENCE & ENVIRONMENT Ceri Morgan MEDIA Aline Ungewiss, Nadia Bonjour HEALTH Liz Stauber JOBS AND MONEY Gill Roberts PROBLEM PAGE Grace De Ville FIVE MINUTE FUN Lara Bell PICTURE EDITORS James Perou, Sarah Day ONLINE EDITOR Paul Springett PROOF READERS Aisling Tempany, Andy Rennison, Beth Herdman, Kieran Harwood CONTRIBUTORS Corinne Rhoades, Tasha PrestSmith, Sian Ridden, Eleanor Morrey, Stacey Hughes, Samantha Shillabeer, Aisling Tempany, Tim Hewish, Julia McWatt, Amy Davies, Daniel Tennant-Ralphs, Pete Evans, Ruth Smith, Ben Walker ADDRESS University Union, Park Place Cardiff, CF10 3QN ADVERTISING 02920 781 474 EMAIL gairrhydd@gairrhydd.com WEB www.gairrhydd.com LOCATION 4th Floor Students’ Union

Media

p.16

Asking the age-old question, how have media degrees come to gain the reputation of being ‘Mickey Mouse’?

Backpage

...in numbers

1/5

of employers use Facebook to check out potential employees

1

Fopp shop opens in the Students’ Union

30ish

students present at MedClub consultation

Sport Cricket win a BUSA Premier league title, the first time any AU club has done so

The week in pictures...

James Perou looks at the city by day, and the University by night

18

days until the Summer Ball

£2,000

needed for student to go on charity trek in Iceland

The weather Monday, May 28

10° Tuesday, May 29

12° Wednesday, May 30

12° Thursday, May 31

15° Friday, June 1

17° Saturday, June 2

17° Sunday, June 3

16°

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NEWS

MAY.28.2007 NEWS@gairrhydd.COM

Essay cheat crackdown Sian Ridden Reporter

New addition to Students’ Union will ensure Cardiff students have easy access to a wide range of film and music Joanna Dingle News Editor A NEW DVD and music shop opened last week in the Students’ Union.

Fopp, which is open from 9.30am until 9pm, is a new addition to the Union and can be found opposite the Union Shop on the first floor.

Team Leader of the Fopp store,

Caught out

York students punished, after exam identity swap

James Allen said: “Lots of students have come in and said, ‘I can’t believe I’m leaving and Fopp has just opened in the Union!’”

“We’ve found that people are coming out of exams, either happy or depressed, and treating themselves to something from the shop.”

Third year student, Andy Rennison said: “I went in for a browse, and came out with gangsters.”

PHOTO: Rob Taylor

Fopp has landed

GOOGLE is to ban adverts for essay writing firms after claims that it is threatening standards of university degrees.

University authorities have keenly welcomed the ban, which comes into force next month, warning that plagiarism devales the hard work produced by honest students.

However essay-writing services have been angered, stating this is an unfair move.

One UK essay service Essaywriter.co.uk, argues that this ban punishes legitimate businesses.

Managing director Matthew Wilson said: “80% of customers are filtered through Google, with the majority from overseas.”

He argues that the ban will not stop rogue essay-selling companies, whereas his firm makes clear that essays should not be passed off as the students own work.

Cardiff university student Amy Davies agrees with the ban saying that essay-writing sites are ‘an expensive way to fail your degree’.

Journalism Lecturer and Director of Postgraduate Research Studies Dr Paul Mason, thinks that Google is making the wrong move.

He argues: “Censorship of any kind is wrong. It is down to the student’s own integrity and lectures own ability to spot plagiarism.”

Icy trek for charity

Corinne Rhoades Deputy News Editor EXAM STRESS drove a student to commit fraud by swapping his identity with a friend, a court has heard.

Qui Shi Zhang, a final-year student at the University of York was said to have suffered ‘something of a breakdown’ under the pressure of his exams.

Qui and his friend Xin Zhang were caught in the act of cheating when Xin agreed to sit Qui’s three-hour business finance exam.

Police were alerted when Qui’s ID card photograph bore no resemblance to the student sitting the paper.

Qui, an economics undergraduate, was larger and longer-haired than the 24-year-old Xin, who was short, skinny and wearing glasses.

A court was also told how Xin actually had little knowledge of economics, highlighting a fatal flaw in the students’ plan.

Both were sentenced to 100 hours of community service and told to pay £35 in costs.

Tasha Prest-Smith Reporter A CARDIFF STUDENT will be trekking across the harsh terrain of Iceland in a bid to raise £2000 for the Royal National Institute of the Blind (RNIB).

Steven Millership, a third year Biochemistry Student, will be part of a group of six people hiking across the volcanic and glaciated barren lands of rural Iceland this September.

After seeing an RNIB promotional poster at the start of this year, Steven decided to embark on a 7-day trek for the charity.

Far from feeling apprehensive, he believes that the trip will be ‘a great personal challenge’.

He said: “I realised this was a great opportunity to travel exten-

sively to one of the more remote parts of the world.

“The money raised from the trek will hopefully provide RNIB with the chance to help people whose lives have been devastated by sight loss,” he added.

But another challenge facing Steven is the fundraising.

Having already raised £700 for the charity, he must reach the £2000 target before he can embark on his journey.

In between training and studying for his finals, Steven has been preparing summer fundraisers such as raffles, a football game, a function night, and charity bagpacking.

Anyone interested in helping him achieve his target can donate at www.justgiving.com/icelandsteve.

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NEWS

MAY.28.2007 NEWS@gairrhydd.COM

Clubbed out?

A fatal fall

MedClub consultation concerning future plans to convert into cybercafe, attended by just 30 students Continued from front page “This meeting has been very badly scheduled. At least 330 people have an important exam the day after the open forum and it is smack bang in the middle of the exam season for everyone else.”

The University’s plan is to redevelop the space in Neuadd Meirionnydd at the Heath Hospital into a Cyber Café / Coffee Shop under the control of University Residences and Catering Division instead of the bar run currently by Cardiff Students’ Union.

During a two-hour period, the executive officers of Cardiff Students’ Union and the head of Residences and Catering division heard the concerns of Healthcare students about the plans.

Michael, a first year Healthcare student and Simon, a first year Biomedical Sciences student, told

gair rhydd that they thought the problem was the lack of transport to events at the Union.

“We’re both in Medics Football and we would always come up to MedClub for a few drinks before Rubber Duck. We’ve been doing it less though because the minibus that the Union lays on between the Heath and the Union hasn’t been showing up.

“You don’t want to have to walk all the way from the Heath to Rubber Duck in winter.”

Heath students have also voiced their concerns using Facebook and set up a group of over 200 members to oppose plans to scrap the bar at MedClub.

The announcement that MedClub would become a coffee shop led to angry comments from some of the members.

One message written within the ‘Cardiff Med Club’ group said: “I’m not sure if it’s obvious from the way

it sounds but this consultation isn’t about whether MedClub should be a bar or not.

“That decision has already been taken. This is about how the space is best utilised as something other than a bar.”

The ownership of MedClub is complex, with the building being owned by the NHS, rented to Cardiff University and currently used by the Students’ Union in ‘sub-agreement’ with the University according to the agreement put in place when University of Wales, College of Medicine (UWCM) and Cardiff University merged in 2004.

A clause in the merger agreement states that the University transfer the ‘properties, rights and privileges’ of the former UWCM Students’ Union to any body which appears to have the same ‘aims, objects and functions’ as the UWCMSU would have had.

SPANISH PEAKS: Beautiful but deadly

Former Cardiff student plunges to death after mountaineering accident Eleanor Morrey Reporter A DOCTOR who studied at Cardiff University has plunged to his death after falling while mountain climbing in Spain.

Ian Burnell, known as “Burnie”, fell 80ft from a cliff-face on the outskirts of Altea, not far from Alicante in the south east of the country.

The 26-year-old was mountaineering with three friends when he attempted to scale a vertical wall and fell.

The rescue operation called in the help of specialist fire-fighters and a helicopter, but Dr Burnell was declared dead shortly after he was found. Spanish police have now launched an investigation.

Dr Burnell, from Reading, Berkshire, studied medicine at Cardiff University and was described

by one friend as “universally popular”.

Laura Jarvis, a third-year Cardiff medical student who studied under Dr Burnell in September, said: “I was very sad to hear the news. It’s a great loss for the medical school because he was an amazing teacher.

“He supervised my first placement and always had time for us, which really made a difference and we learnt a lot.”

Tributes have poured in to the internet site Facebook from acquaintances praising the dedicated Christian’s selflessness.

His sister Lucy said: “On behalf of my family, can I thank everyone for their kind comments, they are such a blessing for us all to read and my parents are incredibly touched.”

A memorial for Dr Burnell is due to be held at Greyfriars Church in Reading on May 30 at 1pm.

Mood expert A medical miracle makes money OPERATING THEATRE: All-too-familiar place for Cardiff student, Allison

Tasha Prest-Smith Reporter

A STUDENT from Cardiff University is living proof of a medical miracle.

Allison John, a 29-year old medical student, is the first person in the UK to have had four major organ transplants: liver, kidney, lungs and heart.

Allison is so used to surgery that she even joked about staying awake to receive her recent life-saving new kidney while listening to the Red Hot Chili Peppers on her iPod. “I feel very lucky to have had this many chances,” says Allison, who owes her latest lease of life to her dad, retired builder David John.

Born with cystic fibrosis, Allison has suffered from poor health for most

of her life, but doctors also discovered serious problems with her liver at just seven-years-old.

At 14 she was placed on the transplant list and, after an exhaustive search, a donor was finally found.

“I was given three days to live,” said Allison. “Any longer and I just wouldn’t have made it.”

Unfortunately, her illness had caused her to miss getting the A-level grades she needed to go on to fulfil her dream of studying medicine.

And, not long after starting a degree course in Neuroscience at Cardiff University, she developed breathing difficulties.

Back home in West Wales, she learned she needed an urgent lung transplant, but because a double procedure was easier to perform, surgeons operated to remove her healthy

heart too, which went to a young boy from Kent.

Meeting him renewed her desire to become a doctor.

“I broke down crying; it was so wonderful to think I was finally helping someone else,” enthused Allison.

She also found love with Kiwi Nathan Angell, who was working in the area.

Unfortunately, last December, Allison’s kidneys began to fail and her dad turned donor to save her.

Still living in Cardiff, Allison is allowing herself to plan a future for herself and Nathan, including a trip to New Zealand.

“I’m so positive about the future and can’t wait to be finally a doctor,” she said.

Allison added: “I’m absolutely loving my life.”

A Cardiff University lecturer picks up thousands of pounds for his research Stacey Hughes Reporter A CARDIFF UNIVERSITY medical scientist has won major research awards in the US, picking up over $100,000 in prize money.

Dr Danny Smith was employed in the position of Clinical Lecturer in February 2006 and works in Cardiff’s school of medicine.

One of the awards Dr Smith has achieved, entitled ‘Young Minds in Psychiatry’, supports research into fostering the development of up-and-

coming researchers in the field.

Professor Mike Owen, the head of the Psychological medicine department stated: ‘The award underlines the commitment of the Cardiff department to develop a cadre of clinical researchers who are able to translate findings from basic research into benefit for patients’.

This year Dr Smith also won the young investigator award from another American funder for research.

This allows Dr Smith to research mood disorders and is overseen by the national association for research into Schizophrenia and depression.

gairrhydd 5

NEWS

MAY.28.2007 NEWS@gairrhydd.COM

‘Talented, friendly and smiley’ Continued from front page forgotten. Even by people who barely knew you. Your massive smile has happymaking power!”

Rachel has been described as a determined student, who handed her dissertation in only the week before her death.

Head of the School of Music, Professor Robin Stowell said: “We are doing everything we can to provide support for the student community in the

School at this sad and very difficult time.”

The School of Music intends to organize coach travel to Rachel’s funeral, which will be held on Tuesday May 29 in her hometown of Plymouth, to transport the many students who it is expected will want to attend.

A memorial concert in celebration of Rachel’s life is also being planned by the music department, in consultation with Rachel’s close friends and family, for

the end of June.

Friends have praised the University’s handling of the situation, saying that lecturers and staff have been supportive and helpful.

A University spokesperson said: “The University’s thoughts and condolences are with the student’s family and friends at this sad time and the University's Counselling Service is available to those affected.”

CHEERFUL AND POSITIVE: Rachel Copp enjoyed a good night out with friends, and had a talent for fancy dress

Friends remember vibrant Rachel for her caring nature, big smile and love of fancy dress after her recent unexpected death STAFF AND STUDENTS at the School of Music are said to be ‘stunned and deeply saddened’

by Rachel’s death, and have this week shared their memories of her as a caring person who loved a good night out, especially if it involved fancy dress.

Rachel enjoyed ‘going out with friends, dancing (and singing badly!), and anything that generally involves having fun’.

Laura Foster and Lindsey Beamont recounted how her costumes were the best on Music School pub-crawls and that her favourite place to go out was Union night Fun Factory.

Laura said: “I’m really glad of the times in the last few weeks when we all sat outside the music department in the sun, as these were some of the last times that we saw her.”

“She made you feel better just by looking at her” Housemate Craig Keates recalled that she used to play Girls Aloud and Will Young at top volume, and said: “She made you feel better just by looking at her, because she was always smiling.

“She may not have been the most

bubbly character, but you can see from the amount of tributes that she touched so many lives because she was such a caring person.

“She was always on MSN Messenger and Facebook, checking that all her friends were ok.”

One of Rachel’s favourite quotes was: ‘In the cookies of life, friends are the chocolate chip’, and the many tributes paid to her attest to her affectionate nature.

Music student Kathy Tang said: “She was always there for me and was very supportive indeed.

“Her beautiful smile and her wonderful personality will be missed by many.”

Fellow student Neil Southgate added: “Rachel was an unbelievably gorgeous young woman. She brightened up my life and I will always take her sunshine throughout life with me.”

“She was an unbelievably gorgeous young woman, and I will always take her sunshine with me throughout life”

Friends have recalled the pianist’s talent as a musician, who had recently played the piano in a lunchtime concert in the School of Music.

One wrote on Rachel’s Facebook wall: “I will always remember you when I play the piano. You were my perfect duet partner!”

A fellow music student added: “You’ll be in my heart ALWAYS! Especially when I play the piano tomorrow!”

A concert by the Cardiff Bach Choir was dedicated to Rachel’s memory on May 19, and students will have a further chance to commemorate her at her funeral on Tuesday May 29.

International innovations Samantha Shillabeer Deputy News Editor CARDIFF UNIVERSITY is to open a new international research centre, worth £4.2 million.

The centre has been funded with a grant from the Engineering and Physical Sciences Research Council under the Science and Innovation Awards scheme, with Cardiff being the first university in the UK to benefit from such investment.

Professor Robert Grubbs, who was

awarded the 2005 Nobel Prize in Chemistry, gave a lecture to mark the official opening of the centre’s main laboratory.

Research at the centre will be led by Professor Barry Carpenter and will include work on medicines and environmentally-friendly developments.

Dr Kiek Buurma and Dr Eric Tippmann have also been appointed as lecturers in physical organic chemistry.

Professor Kingsley Cavell, head of Cardiff’s School of Chemistry, said: “The establishment of the Cardiff

Centre for Physical Organic Chemistry marks a major coup for Cardiff University.”

He added: “It will now serve as a focal point to re-invigorate this area of research activity, and to re-establish the UK as a major player in this field of research in the international arena.”

Renowned chemist, and former director general of the UK Science Research Councils, Sir John Cadogan, also praised the opening of the centre.

He said: “It is a great step forward for world-leading science in the UK.”

NEW RESEARCH CENTRE: Ikea style

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WORLD NEWS World News in brief

MAY.28.2007 NEWS@gairrhydd.COM

Frisky hamsters cure jet lag New research proposed by Argentinian scientists suggests that Viagra could be the remedy for jet lag, after testing the drug and simulating day and night on hamsters

Adam Millward News Editor

Corinne Rhoades Deputy News Editor

Jail-bird run

HAMSTERS on Viagra may have discovered the cure to jet lag, according to Argentine scientists.

The drug, usually used to treat male impotence, was given to the hamsters after the scientists had confused them by switching the lab lights on and off.

Viagra-dosed hamsters recovered from their scientifically-induced jet lag up to 50% quicker than those who had not been given the drug.

AN ESCAPEE EMU was at the centre of a police chase in Germany last week.

The German police tracked down the bird with the help of local vets and zoo staff, but with no success in catching it after several hours, they had to call on Swiss reinforcements.

Clocked travelling at 30mph, the police forces could not catch the emu and eventually had to shoot it.

A police spokesman said: “We managed to shoot the bird, but we are still trying to find out how it got here in the first place. No bird farms or zoos in the area say they are missing an emu. It is a mystery.”

But after the experiment resulted in embarrassing sideeffects for the rodents, researchers decided to stop using the high doses they had intended.

A report in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences last week stated: “We used the intermediate dose for the rest of the experiments because at that dose animals did not manifest the effects of sildenafil [Viagra]-induced penile erections.”

The researchers, from the Universidad Nacional de Quilmes in Buenos Aires, fed the hamsters Viagra at night.

They were able to simulate eastbound flight conditions by exposing the animals to bright lights six hours earlier than expected.

Jet lag, which causes insom-

nia, sleepiness and an inability to concentrate in humans, was judged in the hamsters as they ran on their exercise wheels.

By introducing Viagra into the animals’ systems, there was an interference with levels of a compound that plays a role in regulating the internal body clock.

Although the drug helped in testing the hamsters’ reactions to jet lag in the simulation of an eastbound flight, when given before the simulation of a westbound flight the same results did not show.

The results of the study suggest that Viagra could help humans cope with jet lag or shift work, as long as they did not take the same amount as used for treating erectile dysfunction.

HAMSTER: Mile-higher?

When cats fly A CHINESE woman has claimed her pet cat has sprouted wings.

Granny Feng’s cat started growing the wings – which according to its owner make her feline look like a ‘cat angel’ – a month previously.

Feng of Xianyang city, Shaanxi province, said: “At first, they were just two bumps, but... after a month there were two [four-inch] wings.”

Feng puts the growth down to sexual harassment. She explained: “A month ago, many female cats in heat came to harass him, and then the wings started to grow.”

Mini gun

Counting children in China

Tasha Prest-Smith Reporter

CHINA: Farmers tilling their land INSET: Chinese children - restricted

Un-Happy Mac FAST FOOD restaurant McDonald’s has petitioned for the re-definition of ‘McJob’.

According to the Oxford English Dictionary, a McJob is ‘an unstimulating, low-paid job with few prospects.’

McDonald’s insists that this definition is out-of-date and grossly misrepresentative and claims a survey shows 69% of the UK agree.

Senior vice-president of McDonald’s, David Fairhurst, said: “The current definition is extremely insulting to the 67,000 people who work for us within the UK.”

Samantha Shillabeer Deputy News Editor THOUSANDS of villagers have clashed with police in China over the country’s controversial family planning restrictions.

The violence erupted last weekend in Guangxi province, an autonomous region bordering Vietnam.

The rioting reportedly broke out after the local government levied fines on families that had too many children under what has become known as China’s one-child policy.

Urban dwellers are only allowed one child, while villagers can have two if the first is a girl.

Local residents have been accused of starting fires and destroying public property, and at least one person was

injured as villagers and riot police threw stones at each other, reports have claimed.

Speaking to Hong Kong’s Ming Pao Daily News newspaper, one resident said: “The farmers were really angry because the family planning team was going around to homes and making farmers pay fines if they had too many kids.”

She added: “If the farmers had no money they took things from them.

Property with value they confiscated, things with no value they destroyed.”

Other accounts posted on Chinese internet forums claimed that officials took everything from livestock to electronic goods and household items such as pots and pans.

Some witnesses have put the number involved in the rioting at around 10,000, although other reports have

said that there were many more people.

China’s one-child law was introduced in the 1970s in order to keep the country’s population – the world’s biggest at 1.3 billion – to a size the government believes is sustainable.

But the policy has been controversial from the start, with frequent reports of forced late-term abortions and sterilizations.

Last weekend’s protests are the latest in a growing number of violent incidents across China.

The country’s residents have vented anger at issues such as official corruption, a growing gap between the rich and the poor, and land confiscations.

According to official figures, there were 87,000 protests, officially termed as “mass incidents”, reported in 2005, up 50% from 2003.

BUBBA LUDWIG, 10 months old, has successfully obtained a gun licence in the US state of Illinois.

Bubba’s father, Howard Ludwig, applied on his behalf after his grandfather bequested him a shotgun.

Mr Ludwig, 30, said he had not expected to succeed, but he filled in the online form, paid $5 and the licence was his.

Two rejections did in fact come, but both were related to technical problems rather than Bubba’s youth.

Ludwig’s third attempt was rewarded with a state firearm owner’s identification card (FOID), complete with details of Bubba’s height, weight and date of birth.

The licence includes a picture of a toothless Bubba and a squiggle that represents his ‘signature’.

US gun laws are regularly the subject of fierce debate, renewed recently after April’s Virginia Tech killings.

Gunman Cho Seung-hui was able to exploit a loophole in Virginia state law and obtain weapons, despite having a history of mental illness. However, Illinois gun laws are said to be among the strictest in the US. Illinois State Police, who oversee the application process, said that they had followed the law in this case.

“There are no restrictions under the act regarding age of applicants,” the Associated Press news agency quoted Lt Scott Compton as saying.

Mr Ludwig said Bubba’s gun would be likely to remain at his grandfather’s house until he was 14.

gairrhydd

EDITORIAL & OPINION

MAY.28.2007 OPINION@gairrhydd.COM

freewords the voice of gairrhydd

Est. 1972

Batsmen lead the way

IT HAS BEEN a historic week for Cardiff University sport. Notably our men’s cricket team has surpassed all expectations by becoming the first Cardiff side ever to win a BUSA Premier League competition.

Although many of our BUSA sides have reached their respective Premier leagues or won lower divisions, no other team has previously emerged as champions of a top-flight competition.

Furthermore our cricketers must be applauded for winning the BUSA Premier South league in style, without losing a single match. So often in the past, matches have been rained off. But Cardiff admirably fought against the weather to win matches, while other teams might have settled for a draw.

And considering many students are occupied with the added stress of exams at this time of year, one can argue that the triumphant Cardiff cricketers deserve even more credit for their excellent performances.

Yet Cardiff University sport must continue to prosper, and we must look to the future. Although the AU successfully campaigned to lay down a state-of-the-art rubber crumb surface in Talybont several months ago, this should only be a sign of what is to come.

Excellent sports facilities attract more students to study at certain universities. That’s a fact. So there is no reason why Cardiff shouldn’t continue to invest in sport over the next few years.

Medical consultation

KAREN TANNER, DIRECTOR of the University’s Residences and Catering division, must be commended for actually attending the MedClub open forum meeting and engaging in discussion with concerned Heath students. It’s nice to see a senior University figure actually talking to students when many senior University figures in her place would not.

But unfortunately, a true consultation the meeting was not.

Less than 30 students and not one female attended, probably because of the University’s shortsighted scheduling of the forum in the middle of an already-stressful exam period.

While there have been posts on Blackboard and the like asking students to comment on proposals, it would be unforgivable for the University to go ahead with developments without further consultation of those who could not be present.

However, what must be noted is that while there are differing views on what should happen to MedClub, there is one constant from Heath students.

All are calling to keep the plaques of the former UWCM Students’ Union in their former glory in the newly redeveloped MedClub. Healthcare students, whether in favour of the coffee shop or the crazy hedonic days of MedClub as a bar, are strong willed when it comes to who they are and where they have come from.

MedClub is a symbol of the struggle for Heath students to keep their identity separate, whether admirable or not, from the rest of Cardiff University.

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Media Maddyness On May 3, Madeleine McCann disappeared from a Portuguese hotel room. Nearly a month later, the media hasn’t given up the search – or the story. Aisling Tempany asks if all the media coverage is appropriate

M

adeleine McCann probably doesn’t realise the furore her disappearance has created. The national appeals, the support funds, the T-shirts, the posters, the Facebook groups… it’s everywhere. The media have made it their humanitarian mission to find this girl and make sure we remember her. However, the media and the McCanns’ constant appeals for ‘Maddy’ are beginning to gradually have an adverse effect on the cause. The more they plea to us, the less sympathetic we become.

From the first day of this, many people were rather cynical about its media attention. After all, that same weekend a pregnant teenager was stabbed and soldiers died in Iraq, while BBC journalist Alan Johnston has now been missing for nearly 80 days. So what made this particular missing child so newsworthy?

It seems more and more of us are becoming exhausted by this media situation The more cynical among us point to the middle-class family; the doctor father. Also, Madeleine’s picture-perfect quality: her blonde, happy smiling face plastered over the papers has made some people forget that the parents left their children alone while they went for a meal. Social workers take children away from single benefit mothers for such actions. The media vilifies such behaviour. Some of us find this bias of the McCann story hard to ignore.

But this cynicism has so far remained largely silenced. Those of us who are exhausted by the media coverage are considered cold and heartless.

To some, we are as bad as the kidnappers. Why do we not join the search?

Why do we not pass on the chain mails, and put her poster up in our windows? We’re all sick – so the media feels.

The more they plea to us, the less sympathetic we gradually become So why are we turning our backs on this cause? Suddenly anti-Maddy groups are emerging. It is still a terrible case – Madeleine is still missing.

But so, a lot of us may think, are many people. Maddy is not likely going to be in The Woodville, so should we be looking there? Should the authorities be flooded with false sightings?

It seems more and more of us are becoming exhausted by this media situation. We can hardly be blamed – this child went missing in Portugal, and what can we do, stuck in Cardiff with

THE McCANNS: media-savvy our own lives to sort out? It’s as if the media, and the McCanns to an extent, expect us all to drop our lives for this.

Comparisons have been made with the case of Princess Diana. Diana, though, was famous before her death.

Her death cemented her status as a cultural icon. Maddy, however, is fouryears-old, and therefore it is very cruel to make fun of her, but any recent visit to YouTube will show a number of

mockeries of the video appeals.

Disappointingly for the McCanns, and for Madeleine, this story is running its course, and the media may tire of reporting on Maddy before she is found. Once that happens, few will continue to care to look for her and the McCanns will be left alone in Portugal, without the cameras there to film them crying and releasing statements.

The one person who seems to be forgotten in this media circus, this game of Where’s Wally?, is the fouryear-old who disappeared from the room she was in on May 3.

What do you think? Let us know at www.gairrhydd.com

8

gairrhydd

EDITORIAL & OPINION

MAY.28.2007 OPINION@gairrhydd.COM

The Vandal Scandal

The Cutty Sark, the legendary trading vessel of the 19th century, has been set ablaze. Adam Millward laments the ever-rising popularity of vandalism

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ILLUSTRATION: ANDREW STYLES

sually, I’d be starting to worry about my journalistic integrity if I found myself agreeing with The Sun, but I can’t help but think they might have something when they insist that the culprits of the suspected arson attack on the Cutty Sark should be dealt with severely.

OK, so it’s not as if the boat was our Eiffel Tower or Taj Mahal. They didn’t blow up Buckingham Palace, we’ve still got Stonehenge and yes, the new Wembley Stadium is still standing. But this is a matter of principle, not scale.

When I say the guilty party should be handled severely, The Sun might have (true to form) overstepped the line when they suggest that “scurvy yobs… deserve to be keel-hauled and flogged for vandalism”. I was thinking more along the lines of a hefty fine, some public humiliation and a good dose of community service.

I’m aware that the investigation is by no means resolved - perhaps it was all an accident - but the case of the Cutty Sark raises some significant questions, about both the individual drawn to destruction and society as a whole.

The culprits of the suspected arson attack on the Cutty Sark should be dealt with severely Vandalism is everywhere and has been for centuries. Originating from the Vandals, a violent Germanic tribe of the fifth century A.D. who plundered buildings and artistic monuments, it plays just as large a part in the 21st century as it did then. There is no escaping it - whether it’s the smashed window of a kebab shop on City Road, the (now removed) graffiti on the side of the Union or a burnt down 19th century merchant ship that has attracted more than 15 million visitors since it was permanently drydocked in Greenwich in 1954.

Back near Bournemouth (my hometown), particularly in the New Forest, authorities face annual problems with heath arsonists during the summer months. Heathland is, in global terms, rarer than rainforest and supports many species of plant and fauna found nowhere else in the world; hardly, then, a resource which should be squandered at the hands of arsonists.

On holiday in Italy, I was amazed when walking up the spiral staircase within the Duomo - one of the most famous buildings in Florence - to find the age-old stone walls smothered in writing. Despite Perspex sheets and signs asking visitors to restrain the seemingly overpowering urge to scribble names and profound messages such as “I woz here” in over 30 languages, SAW (or Sabotage Against Walls) still persisted.

Is there some lesson to deface taught at primary school that I’ve forgotten about? Is it something in our genes? Or am I just missing the point?

Whether it’s nature or nurture, the condition appears to be endemic.

Who’d get away with laying their tag on Ayers Rock unless you had aboriginal links?

Why else must so many exhibitions in galleries and museums be placed behind ropes and screens? Of course there is the issue of safety but without a doubt, preservation is also key; so many feel they have to leave their mark. Let’s face it, if the barriers were all taken down it wouldn’t take a day before the Mona Lisa was given a moustache or at least people started incorporating secret messages a la The Da Vinci Code.

But there seems to be a hierarchy of tolerance when it comes to vandalism.

While most would accept graffiti and the odd snapped windscreen wiper as par for the course in a city (car vandalism constitutes 40% of British vandalism, according to government figures), when it comes to the damage of more ‘culturally significant’ objects, there is public uproar.

But just when one thinks you’ve found the moral high ground, knowing that vandalism of the old and distinctly landmarkish type is wrong and should not be tolerated, a spanner - or more a cram-packed tool box - is thrown into the works, as the exceptions rear their ugly/beautiful heads.

Eons ago, on a school trip to some National Trust house, the guide cheerfully pointed out ‘love poems’ which had been etched into a leaded glass window, signed by mysterious initials and 17th century dates. But this damage was not criticised; from what I can remember it was described as unique, even charming, and the visitors

seemed to agree. For all I know it could have been scratched there by the National Trust the week before (just kidding, if any National Trust lawyers happen to be reading) but the point is, there seems to be more than a hint of hypocrisy.

Is there some lesson to deface taught at primary school that I’ve forgotten about?

When you start thinking about it, these inconsistencies are not scarce either. After all, how would cave paintings be considered by today’s standards? Who’d get away with laying their tag on Ayers Rock - unless, perhaps, you have aboriginal links?

The overplayed clip of the Iraqi people toppling Saddam Hussein’s statue were ‘slaves’ uprising against decades of an oppressive regime, not vandals.

And you can’t overlook the host of artists for which ‘vandalism’ is all part of the Art, such as the controversial Banksy. For the artist Andy Goldsworthy, who, for one project, dropped 13 giant snowballs around London, the public’s interaction with his work (including ‘drunken snowball fights’) was a central aspect. Very post-modern.

For some vandals, it’s all about the kicks. For others, it’s about expression Maybe I am drifting too far from the Cutty Sark. Clearly, most would agree that there is a major distinction between arson and other forms of vandalism and the issue of risk, whether it be human, animal or environmental, must always be taken into consideration. A wall besmirched with a pot of Dulux cannot equate to 100 acres of heathland and all its inhabitants being burnt to a cinder. However, some have argued that all criminal damage can have serious implications.

According to findings drawn from the British Crime Survey, the Government suggests: “The way we perceive our surroundings has a massive impact on both communities and individual behaviour. A neglected physical environment is unsafe. It undermines pride in the local community that can lead to further degradation. It can also act as a catalyst to other forms of anti-social behaviour and crime.”

Perhaps it’s pertinent to bear in mind that the Cutty Sark will be lovingly restored with thousands of pounds of charitable funding. How much do councils across the UK receive to tackle these “neglected physical environment[s]”?

What is the human cost of letting these forgotten communities spiral out of control?

So let’s surmise: for some vandals, it’s all about the kicks. For others, it’s about expression - leaving a cultural legacy. No doubt there are some who do it out of peer pressure. Then those who want to rebel and for a few it’s about being post-modern.

Well, here’s an idea for anyone thinking about taking out any other British landmark. If you want to share a thrill with friends, then why not try diving with great white sharks? If you want to rebel, do it without the safety cage. If you also want to leave a cultural legacy, get one of your mates to film it. And if you want to be postmodern, do one and two, then spend your last few moments convincing yourself that the meaning of being eaten by sharks is multiple and constantly shifting so you’ll probably be just fine.

That is until one of your ‘mates’, who’s secretly a compulsive nautical arsonist, sets the bloody boat on fire...

gairrhydd 9

OPINION

MAY.28.2007 EDIFICATION@gairrhydd.COM

Edification Minding the gaps

Cowering away from the real world like a healthy badger from its diseaseridden set

I

t is a well-known fact that the amount of academic effort a student puts into their undergraduate degree is inversely proportional to the amount of time they have spent on that degree.

Or, in equation form, E = (t-N)/t.

Where E is the effort put into the degree course, t is the time spent on that course in months, and N is time spent watching Neighbours. (The more astute among you will have noticed that this equation actually proves that Neighbours is good for the brain.)

By the end of the third year, most students have reached such a level of boredom with their chosen field that they can barely summon up the amount of effort they expended on their Year Nine SATS. This draining away of passion for the subject of study is inevitable, and cannot be rectified.

However, the undergraduate degree classification system - the other major factor which causes many students to make more of an effort in their pointless first year than their pivotal third can, and should, be changed.

For a huge proportion of students at this and every other university in the UK, academic ambitions for their undergraduate degree follow a common downward arc. Initial hopes of a Geoff (First) linger for around one and a half semesters of the second year.

But then, confronted with results and a worrying amount of pubs not yet visited, the student rethinks, settles down, and allows their average to slide slowly downwards within the vast comfy caress of the Attila (2:1).

For most of the remaining student population, the same applies, only with the Geoff replaced by an Attila

The truth about... the weather

N

obody ever mentions that the weather can make or break your day. But perhaps they should, because it really can.

Oasis were wrong about many things. It’s not, for example, possible to walk slowly down the hall faster than a cannonball; souls don’t slide away; and no matter how much you like somebody, you should never describe them as a wonderwall - that’s just stupid.

On the weather front, however, the Gallagher brothers got it right. On hot days, such as the slice of blazing sum-

GEOFF: First

ATTILA: 2:1

DESMOND: 2:2

DOUGLAS: Blimey

and the Attila replaced by a Desmond (2:2).

The simple fact is that the classification system’s categories are far too wide in span. The difference in academic ability between a student who gets an average mark of 68 and a student who gets an average mark of 59.5 is enormous, yet both will be rewarded for their efforts with an Attila - bunched together within a single massive bracket. For Jimmy 59.5 this is a great relief, but Tony 68, quite justifiably, can feel considerably aggrieved.

they try, the best mark they can really hope for is a 67 or 68. However, with almost no effort at all, they can blag a 60 or a 61. The academic side of University thus becomes an exercise in mental sleepwalking; effort is pointless, because whether they put in a huge amount of work or none at all, the result remains the same.

It’s difficult to write an article on degree classifications without sounding like that Geography teacher at secondary school who had a drip hanging permanently from one cavernous nostril, so perhaps I should clarify my somewhat selfish position here. I am Tony 68.

If I do not get a Geoff - and this is a very likely prospect due to the fact that I haven’t watched nearly enough Neighbours to allay the effort-sapping passing of time - I will be bestowed, like a huge proportion of graduates, with an Attila. This is not to disparage the achievement of an Attila. In many courses - Physics, Mathematics and Chemistry are the first three that spring to mind - the gaining of even a

Desmond is a fantastic achievement, requiring grit, determination and an impressive intellect; and an Attila in any subject is, at the very least, a good achievement. I have no intrinsic problem with leaving Cardiff University without a Geoff..

59.5 needed to secure an Attila. Put simply, if I am not lucky enough to scrape a Geoff, I have wasted many, many hundreds of hours of my life.

What needs to be changed is simple: a new category for those with an average between 65 and 70, and a new category for those with an average between 55 and 60. Until this happens, a gargantuan amount of students will be forever tortured by their months of wasted effort, of parties not gone to due to revision, and of sunny days spent indoors.

Classifying two years of work into such capacious categories only fuels our propensity to do the minimum required, and bumble toward the lower end of a spacious grade. Selfish concerns aside, it simply isn’t fair that people with averages 10 marks apart are bundled together under one degree class.

OK, you can all beat me up now.

The simple fact is that the classification system’s categories are far too wide in span Moreover, for some students, an average mark of 70 may be beyond their abilities. No matter how hard

mer we recently experienced where spring was supposed to be, everything in the world is wonderful: the birds sing, people kiss your face all of the time, and frolicking in the park is a daily joy.

On grey and rainy days, however, everything in the world is disgusting and futile, birds choke on their songs and die, people spit on your face, and nobody frolics even a little bit. Bad weather: miserable day. Good weather: happy day. It’s that simple. And living in Cardiff, a city in which rain can quite happily ignore the laws of nature and fall out of a cloudless sky, this presents a real problem.

Talking about the weather is widely considered to be quite dull; small talk used solely to fill the gaps in conversation that open up when people lack the energy to pretend they are interested in each other. But given that my emotion-

The academic side of University can become an exercise in mental sleepwalking My problem lies in the dreadful knowledge that, for my particular course, I could have gone on crack, constructed a steam boat, watched the entire six seasons of The Sopranos six times, got off crack, read The Bible, The Quran, War and Peace and In Remembrance of Things Past, gone back on the crack, eaten a climbing frame, got off crack, visited every pub, club, leisure centre and cinema in Cardiff, and still got the average of

Disagree? Leave your comment at www.gairrhydd.com

al state is now dictated entirely by meteorological activity, I have become an avid aficionado of this most maligned of topics. The quiet proclamation by a friend suggesting that the

On grey and rainy days everything in the world is disgusting and futile, birds choke on their songs and die clouds are going to clear and the sun will be out in full force by the end of the week is enough to get me weeping with joy.

When frequenting nightclubs in the evening, I scan the dancefloor meticu-

SUNSHINE: Crucial, really lously for any signs that a covert raindance may be in progress. It rarely is, but there’s always one joker at the end of the night, drunk out of his wits, who thinks it’ll be funny to make an appeal to a rain god. As ever, the minority try to spoil things for everyone.

Having lived in Cardiff for almost three years now, I know that unlike the

rest of the world, South Wales enjoys only two seasons: nine months of painted grey sky and spitting rain, and three months of glorious sunshine that has got lost on its way to Greece.

We’ve already used up one month of Cardiff’s quota of summer, so every day of sunshine counts. I’m heading out before the gloom descends again.

10 gairrhydd

LETTERS

MAY.28.2007 LETTERS@gairrhydd.COM

letters@gairrhydd.com The gair rhydd website is a great place to discuss your opinions about articles featured in the paper. However, don't forget that you can e-mail any of your opinions on other matters to the letters page. Write a letter and send it to letters@gairrhydd.com and you’re in with a chance of getting Letter of the Week and winning vouchers to spend in the Union.

A selection of website comments “No one is suggesting that the BNP should be ignored and not engaged in political debate, if only to demonstrate to the public at large what a bunch of deranged Neanderthals they are. However there is no fundamental right to address a Students’ Union-a Students’ Union is a business, it is not a forum to debate national politics and, as has been mentioned, a BNP spokesman, especially Nick Griffin, speaking at a Students’ Union would simply be more trouble than it’s worth.”

“Students have led the vanguard of revolutions and politcal advancement for generations: indeed, modern students account for the fantastic growth in interest for the projects of recycling and environmental concern. Socialist Students and others have fought for the current NUS position that we give no position or publicity to racists, homophobes and fascists of the BNP. The BNP are out to smash by any means, the labour movements, the Muslim population of Wales as well as gypsies, and queers etc. Griffin should not speak to any students not because he's more trouble than he's worth but because his philosophy is racist and fundamentally, its immoral worship of the excess of the British Empire's remnants of ‘glory’. Students and especially Joe’s new super Student Parliament should be the very forum

where all political debate takes place so that students can formulate policy to advance the cause of socialism.”

“Why are the BNP treated as pariahs, yet extreme left-wing groups and Islamist organisations are allowed to flourish on campus? As ideologies, Communism and Islamism are at least as fascistic, repressive, and cruel as Nazism. In any case, I would say the BNP's inspiration is more Enoch Powell than Adolf Hitler.”

‘Evolving Devolution’ “It does actually scare me that some people actually think that independence would be good for Wales. The only reason that the Assembly has achieved what it has is because everytime old Rhodders got into a bit of trouble Gordon got out his cheque book and sent a few billion Cardiff’s way so it could be spent on Social Services. Wales is a small country with no industrial or manufacturing base and only has a single and small financially secure area around Cardiff and the urbanised South East.

Past the M4 corridor Wales is like the rest of rural Britain, impoverished, backward and relying on hand outs from the State. If Wales did go independent and our monetary lifeline with London dried up then we’d be up shit creek without a paddle.

Lets pray it doesn’t happen.”

“The simple position is that the

Kelly i cant believe u shat yourself on a bus aged 20. and your nickname is not wolf.

Not only is catdog a sharting dog muncher but he also likes to drink malibu whilst talking to family fish man To the man with glasses: STOP STEALING sugar bags from the Trevithick restaurant!!!

Becky bumhole Yes u know who u r!

Grewey loves hairy ginger swaddie bollocks yes yes oh yay Congrats 2 fitze after 4weeks of hell the gum clinic gave him the all clear on monday

text: 07791165837

‘BNP - Bath nul points’

nationalist alliance in Cymru is going from strength to strength: in the last few years my Party, when Cymru Annibynol, historically offered Wales the opportunity to accept independence: we have firmly established independence as a prime aim of Plaid Cymru and are working towards ever greater promotion of the historical, moral, fiscal, political and economic reasons for the reestablishment of the sovereign nationhood offered to us by gallant Owain Glyndwr during his Great War of Independence. Cymru is now the poorest part of the plastic UK state: we are suffering as a people from poverty of economics, language and culture: simply, we are England’s slaves.”

“Yes, North Wales lacks the cities, but as a proud North Walian I would have to say that it is not impoverished or backward. I’d have to agree that North Wales isn’t as developed as South Wales, but that seems to be because the Assembly thus far, and the government before that, seems to follow the impression that Wales is only Cardiff and the surrounding area. North Wales is probably a far nicer place, but that is arguably because we don’t have all the cities and the mess that goes with them. If the North is as bad as has been commented though, then it is only because the South has ignored us.

But yes, an independent Wales would do us more harm than good.

The reality of it would be vastly different to this utopia that seems to be expected by some people”

letter of the week BNP are racist bigots Dear gair rhydd, I AM WRITING in response to the worrying letter sent in by Fountain last week in which he claimed Bath students and the NUS were ‘disgraceful’ for not allowing the BNP leader Nick Griffin speak at the university.

This is an awful response!

Instead Bath university should be congratulated for not allowing him to speak, not only because the BNP have no place in British society but because of how it will offend students at the university. There is enough racial hatred in Britain without universities allowing it to be voiced.

I almost laughed out loud with shock when I read the Fountain’s argument that it is ‘disheartening how ill-educated people are in this country about the differences between political organisations, movements or ideologies of the right’. This is an absurd argument because I am sure everyone in this country, educated or not, would

Bull-shit I AM WRITING to your fine paper to rally a call to my fellow students for an anti-marketing rebellion against a scourge of ‘guerilla’ advertising that is exploiting Cardiff's streets as an open billboard.

It is apparent that Red Bull are employing a rather unsightly campaign of tagging pavements around the University campus with a stenciled, spray-painted motif and tag line. This pisses me off for two reasons. Firstly, the campaign assumes

accept that right-wing parties have justification to voice their opinions.

I am well-educated and left-wing but I do not agree that the BNP have the right to speak at universities.

Don’t get me wrong I am not against freedom of speech but let’s not make it easy for the BNP, let’s stand up for British ethnic minorities and not make them feel like outcasts at their own university. What is even more worrying is that people do listen to the vile, racist opinions of the BNP. Therefore universities should not help them to do this but should stand up for our multi-racial society and the diversity it brings.

Fountain claimed that people believe anyone further right than the conservatives are seen as ‘racist bigots’. Well, that is exactly what BNP members are, ‘racist bigots’ and they do not deserve the time of day.

Emily Isaacs

WIN WIN WIN The author of Letter of the Week

will receive vouchers to spend in the Union, including CF10, the box office and the shop

that by making their branding visually omnipresent, that it will psychologically have us queuing-up to empty our wallets for their overpriced, over-hyped beverages.

Secondly, it makes a bloody mess of our campus, degrades environmental quality and disrespects the neutrality of public space. So let's turn their filthy scheme on its head and issue a boycott of their product until not only do they foot the bill to clean-up their mess but issue an apology to the residents of Cardiff.

Philip Elias

gairrhydd

11

POLITICS

MAY.28.2007 POLITICS@gairrhydd.COM

Under the grammar With the Tories entering a rough patch over their new education policies, Tim Hewish argues that Cameron has himself to blame

T

he New Conservative’s blank slate on policy is starting to become indelibly blemished.

The first hints of a solid agenda are beginning to emerge, but they’re not in the traditional Tory guise.

Last week, Shadow Education Minster David Willets unveiled what looked like the start of a Conservative policy. In a speech, he broke from the Tory mould of the past, stating that they will not be supporting selective grammar schooling, in which prospective pupils sit an 11-plus entrance exam.

The support for grammar schools has been a cornerstone of Tory philosophy for many decades. It is based on the assumption that grammars act as a way of hauling people out of the lower classes, and through education can therefore progress forward in their social mobility.

Yet the present Cameron stance is arguing that the middle classes play the system so their children receive most grammar school places, so subsequently poor families with bright children still miss out.

The furore is that Cameron’s shift to become more appealing to the centre has happened without consultation with his party.

To put it mildly, his and Willets’ remarks have incensed many party members and activists, but what makes Cameron’s position look like a joke is his contempt, not his support, for the middle classes.

He is first and foremost one of the Conservatives most elitist leaders, in being privately educated at Eton and then at Oxbridge, yet he still prides

himself on knowing what the people want.

It would be fair to say he and his front bench know nothing of peoples’ needs in education because theirs were so removed and distant. Furthermore, Thatcher, Howard and Davis all went to grammar schools and are seen as the figureheads that selective processing can bring.

Since the fallout, both wings of the Party have traded blows, while the influential 1922 Committee denounced Cameron’s policy as “ridiculous and absurd.”

What makes Cameron’s position look like a joke is his contempt, not his support, for the middle classes The Tories are having a Clause IV moment – before he was elected PM Blair ditched the socialist rhetoric of Labour’s Clause IV in order to appeal and modernise the party. Like Blair years ago, Cameron feels that his party will not be electable if it holds on to past ideological baggage.

However, this holy land of the centre ground comes at a price: the alienation of core voters. For example, the Telegraph, commissioned a poll which suggested that 70% of Tory voters support selective education. Cameron’s response was to call the Telegraph’s coverage of his proposed policy as

AHA - Cameron discovers division “near hysterical.”

In this broad political landscape party ruptures have vast consequences; true Tory support may shift allegiance.

As a result, Nigel Farage, the UKIP Leader, said, “I think this is a disconnect between the David Cameron set and real people.”

In concrete terms, it looks as if the

die is cast for Tory policy, in that it is unlikely to be debated within the party’s inner sanctum and PR will be unable to cover the infighting.

Adding to Tory headaches, Cameron’s two-day sojourn working as a teacher’s assistant last week proved just as disastrous, with no one knowing who he or the Conservatives

Coattrition The war to assemble an Assembly government has cost Wales political credibility, says Andy Rennison

I

think Homer said it best: “When will people learn? Democracy doesn’t work!” No doubt several fists have been similarly slammed on tables since May 3, as the Welsh Assembly’s efforts to form a government have laboured on.

As was feared, Wales woke up on the morning of May 4 with both an exit poll hangover and no single majority government.

Out of 60 AMs, Labour fell just short with 26 seats, followed by Plaid, the Tories and the Lib Dems with yet smaller minorities.

The toiling trouble of trying to mould a workable coalition from these remnants came to a head last Thursday when the Lib Dems walked away from

negotiations between themselves, the Tories and Plaid.

Wait a minute: Lib Dems, Tories and Plaid? Socialism, Cameronism and Nationalism? That’s not going to work. Not even slightly.

No huge surprise then that the whole deal is off after Sir Ming’s Welsh army turned their backs on the idea.

But how had the Assembly got themselves into this quagmire, where desperation is so intense that a coalition of chalk, cheese and cheesy chalk is actually under consideration?

In the immediate election aftermath the hot gossip was all about the Lib Dems or Plaid joining forces with the reeling ‘winners’ of the ballot, Labour.

WAITING - Morgan may rule on But these negotiations soon faltered, mired as they were by Rhodri Morgan accidentally insulting the other parties and the Lib Dems splitting down the middle over what to do.

Despite these failed attempts, the idea of some Plaid-Lib-Tory trio man-

aging Wales for the next four years still seems a tad mental.

That this proposal could even survive a day down in the Bay is perhaps an indictment of how centralised the major parties are becoming, embracing the political mainstream and thus nar-

were.

In sum, it has been a bad week for the Conservatives. Despite gaining somewhere near 800 councillors in the local elections without hard policies, Cameron has some convincing to do as he pens his New Conservative manifesto.

rowing the gaps between them, making such an audacious coalition plausible.

Simply, it seems that the big boys are slowly turning into one very big boy. Given the last few years, this is hardly surprising.

The Tories have, as has been well documented, edged liberally leftwards, having started to ‘care’ about the electorate under Cameron. Meanwhile, Plaid have been distancing themselves from their fanatical goal of devolution, dropping the ‘Cymru’ from correspondence and focusing their campaigns on issues rather than sovereignty.

And the Lib Dems… have gone nowhere, merely watching as the other two slide closer towards them on the political spectrum. Even so, for the time being the world’s least stable coalition exists only on paper, now that the Libs have backed out. Where now?

Even if Labour rule the coming term with a minority government, the time taken in battling for a coalition has dented the credibility of the Assembly.

After over three weeks, it would seem that regardless of who leads Wales, they will struggle to work effectively together with other parties in order to get results for its country.

12 gairrhydd

SCIENCE AND ENVIRONMENT

MAY.28.2007 SCIENCE@gairrhydd.COM

A step closer to tidal power Last week the government announced their long overdue Energy White Paper, gair rhydd considers its implications on the River Severn

Ceri Morgan Science and Environment Editor

P

lans for a complete overhaul of the UK’s energy supplies have been announced.

The government’s long-overdue Energy White Paper lays out plans for increased investment in renewable energy and energy efficiency measures, also with the view to improving security of our energy supply.

Industry Secretary Alistair Darling said these measures could save between 22million and 33million tonnes of carbon emissions by 2020.

Mr Darling also stated that the government had reached the preliminary view that, after a consultation period, it would be in the public interest to allow energy companies to invest in nuclear power.

Environmental campaigners say investment in nuclear power would draw money away from the real issue – the need for energy efficiency and other ‘green technologies’.

While nuclear is currently seen as a priority by the government, there are other ‘green’ energy schemes with ministerial backing, such as the Severn Barrage scheme, currently championed by David Miliband, Secretary of State for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs.

The proposed £16bn barrage would run from the south of Cardiff for 10 miles across to south of Weston-SuperMare. There is only one such example of this technology in the world – at La Rance, Brittany – and it is a 30th of the

La Rance, Brittany: Barrage less than one 30th the size of the proposed Severn Barrage. Inset: proposed site for Severn Barrage. Below: a thing of the past? size of the Severn project.

While not much was mentioned about the barrage scheme within the white paper – as tidal power is subject to an inquiry by the official Sustainable Development Commission – the inclusion of the barrage project as a serious option suggests a government U-turn since the last white paper, when the project was ruled out on environmental grounds.

The Severn Estuary has the secondhighest tidal range in the world, therefore holding huge potential as a source for renewable energy. Planners say that it could create 35,000 construction jobs and be producing electricity within 11 years.

Critics say that the impact on wildlife and their habitats far outweighs any barrage proposal, and that

Critics say that the impact on wildlife and their habitats far outweighs any barrage proposal other schemes – such as tidal turbines – need to be fully investigated as possible alternatives.

Tidal turbines are essentially upside-down wind turbines placed at strategic locations. The estuary would still remain tidal, and species could still migrate. However, research into tidal turbines is still very limited, and the barrage scheme has a much bigger

profile, with impressive backers in the form of the Severn Power Tidal Group, a consortium of six major companies.

What is certain is that, before any major engineering project could seriously be considered, all other avenues need to be thoroughly explored and the views of all major players in the Severn Estuary need to be taken into account.

Natasha Barker, from the Severn Estuary Partnership, said: “ The Severn Estuary is a dynamic and diverse estuary with huge value to the economy, environment and society.

“The SEP promote communication between people and organisations around the estuary and would wish to see further debate, research and assessment of the different options for harnessing tidal power before any decisions are made.”

gairrhydd 13 MAY.28.2007

JOBS AND MONEY

JOBS@gairrhydd.COM

Careers countdown

Have you been facebooked?

This week Jobs and Money Editor Gillian Roberts looks at the upcoming graduate careers fair xams done? Coursework handed in? Time to relax? if you are stuck for ideas on what to do with yourselves in September, you should take a stroll down to City Hall on June 14 for a graduate recruitment fair.

The event, which is organised by Cardiff University Careers Service has been named as a ‘Graduate Recruitment Day’ where over 50 companies and organisations are going to be ready to talk to you about their graduate opportunities. It is aimed for final-year students and graduates.

Beginning at 11.00am and ending at 3.00pm, there is enough time to go to as many exhibiters as possible and to take part in workshops which are available. The workshops are designed to encourage final year undergraduates and graduates who may not know of the opportunities and steps to follow next.

As students and graduates are advised to prepare for this event, so they can show themselves off to potential employers, it is useful to take a look at the event’s website www.careers.cardiff.ac.uk/graduate_fa ir/. This is so students and graduates can look at the a-z list of recruiters who will be at the fair. In addition, it may be useful to see what they offer before you go, so that you can ask use-

E

ful questions and make a good impression on the day. Also, check out the timetable of events, so you don’t miss anything you may be interested in.

With 5,000 graduates this year, competition is high With over 25,000 students and postgraduates currently studying at Cardiff University, and 5,000 graduating each year, there is plenty of competition for graduate jobs.

Therefore, the fair can be an excellent chance to get your foot in the door.

Make sure you are well-presented and take along with you questions to ask recruiters, as well as an updated CV. Be enthusiastic and get yourself noticed and make sure they take your details and CV if you are interested in them.

In addition, make sure you take note of who you have spoken to, or given your application to. It may be useful to follow up and email recruiters to see if they have considered you further. This

jobshop Please contact us on 029 2078 1535 or pop in to the Jobshop on the ground floor of the Students’ Union.

Opening hours 10am-4pm MondayFriday.

would demonstrate your enthusiasm and dedication.

Collect personal contacts, names, business cards and any information you will be able to read up on when you get home.

This year a programme will take part at the careers fair called the “New Grad”. Only a few places are available, which is aimed to support students as they leave university. Advice and guidance will be on hand at different workshops, on the topics of job hunting, application forms, interview skills, managing finances and working in Cardiff.

It will definitely help students who are still pondering on which way to turn after graduation.

Students will not be guaranteed a job on the day, but will be introduced to recruiters, armed with information and free pens and hopefully new motivation to get themselves into the world of work successfully.

Students who want to find out more information about the graduate career fair contact the Employer Liaison and Marketing Team on (029) 2087 4828 or email careersfairs@cardiff.ac.uk.

Or if you prefer putting ink to paper, write to Employer Liaison and Marketing Team, The Careers Service, Cardiff University, 5 Corbett Road, Cardiff. CF10 3EB.

Gillian Roberts Jobs & Money Editor t has been recently discovered that more and more employers are using the internet to find out about prospective employees.

According to new research, which included over 600 HR professionals by networking firm Viadeo, it was discovered that many employers were all too keen to check up on applicants.

One in five UK employers have searched and, more importantly, found personal information, while 59% said that what they had found had influenced their decision.

It was also found that a quarter of the 59% said that they rejected the applicant immediately after looking at the internet.

Sites such as Facebook are being logged onto by students and graduates every day who are basically advertising themselves online. It is

I

too easy for employers to join networks and be able to snoop around for any incriminating or unwanted personal details.

It is advisable for students not to forget that potentially anyone could view photos, messages or personal information if privacy settings are set on low.

Spokesman for Viadeo, Peter Cunningham, said: “when people who are not the intended audience such as potential employers - find this information, it can have a major impact on their decision making process.”

Be aware of the ‘big brother’ effect, you are being watched.

One in five employers have searched on the internet for applicants

Has an employer asked you about your Facebook activities? Let us know at jobs@gairrhydd.com

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gairrhydd 15

HEALTH

MAY.28.2007 HEALTH@gairrhydd.COM

Matters of the mind

With 400,000 sufferers in the UK Epilepsy is the country’s most common brain disorder. Liz Stauber finds out more

T

here are more than 100 billion nerve cells in the brain which are used to communicate with one another; some encourage others to send follow up messages (excitation), while others tend to block them (inhibition).

A balance is needed to ensure that the brain works correctly. If there are too many nerve cells sending messages at once without enough being blocked it can lead to what can be described as an electrical storm - or in other words, a seizure.

Common causes can include: brain damage from birth injuries, head injuries, stroke, brain tumours and alcoholism. Some experts believe that seizures have a genetic basis, although it's rare for epilepsy to run in families.

However, no one definite cause has been found.

There is no set group who is most at risk of developing the condition. One in 50 people at some point in their life suffer from seizures and it is believed that around 450,000 people in the UK are affected.

Seizures can occur without any obvious cause, but the risk is much greater in those who've had brain damage. These seizures can occur many years after the injury.

Certain recreational drugs (cocaine,

for example) and alcohol can induce seizures. And while the first seizures can be brought on by the drug in question, eventually spontaneous seizures may occur even after drug use has stopped.

Epilepsy, except in rare circumstances, isn't inherited, although the risk of developing epilepsy may be increased slightly in relatives of those who have the condition.

There are two types of seizures: ! Partial seizures which begin in one area of the brain and then spread. !"Generalised seizures which start in both sides of the brain and cause the patient to lose consciousness.

What a patient suffers from, and how other people see what is happening them depends on the type of seizure that they are suffering from.

Seizures can take many forms and don't always involve losing consciousness or convulsions (when the muscles relax and tighten rhythmically). Most are sudden and short-lived, lasting a matter of seconds or minutes.

Seizures should be considered as a possible cause of recurring episodes of confusion or strange behaviour, especially if the events are short-lived.

Once epilepsy has been diagnosed medication can be prescribed to control the seizures a patient can suffer from.

ROMEO: Allegely suffers from the disease

The choice of drugs depends on the patient and the type of epilepsy they have. The initial dose will be low and gradually increased until the seizures stop.

Sometimes patients can experience side effects, especially if they are on the strong medication. The most common are drowsiness, unsteadiness and dizziness. Rare allergic reactions to some drugs can include rashes and various blood disorders. There may also be longer term side effects such as weight gain and acne.

If the side effects continue or the prescribed drugs do not seem to control the symptoms, a different medication will be tried. Often, the side effects are barely noticeable and work in the best interest of the patient.

For the drugs to work, the patient has to take them continuously. A lot of the time the drugs are thought not to work but it is usually the case that their routine of being taken is not followed.

Suddenly stopping taking them can cause severe seizures.

Many seizure medications react with other drugs, so care has to be taken when starting other medication (for example, antibiotics or painkillers). Many also make the contraceptive pill less effective, meaning patients must inform their doctor before taking the prescription.

16 gairrhydd

MEDIA

MAY.28.2007 MEDIA@gairrhydd.COM

A deceiving web

The internet provides a forum of communication but easily becomes a forum of exploitation Julia McWatt Media Reporter

W

e have all been affected, disturbed and perhaps even perplexed by the disappearance of Madeline McCann, the story that has dominated the press for the past fortnight.

Madeline, who turned four on May 13, was taken from her room in a holiday apartment where her family were staying on holiday in the Algarve, Portugal.

Media coverage has been devoted to finding her but only one suspect has been questioned: Robert Murat, 33, a police interpreter who aided in the investigation and spoke to reporters soon after Madeline’s disappearance.

Murat has not been charged, suggesting that the police have no conclusive evidence to find Madeline or her captor. As a result of this frustration the website findmadeline.com was created by family friend Callum MacRae. It had over 75 million hits within its first 48 hours.

At first glance, this all seems like a proactive idea. The website is an easy

way to spread the message of Madeline’s disappearance globally, which widens the search and will hopefully have the effect of aiding the Portuguese police to find her.

Donations can also be made to the fund that has been set up in Madeline’s name. Amy, a journalism student at Cardiff, follows the views of many when she says that “the internet is a good idea as it is a medium that virtually everyone uses and it is important to keep this story in the public eye”.

However, it has been tainted by the news that more than 20 companies, including estate agencies and dating sites, have deliberately set up websites with similar names to increase hits for their companies. By doing this they take advantage of people’s generosity; however, this practice is not illegal and they are perfectly entitled to do this, whether moral or not.

This leads to the question of whether technology can be of use in appeals such as Madeleine’s or whether it is an opportunity for people to exploit the public’s concern. One student added, “it would be good if the businesses were devoting money to the cause but by doing this they are just

being selfish”.

Since its development, the internet has been regarded as a 20th century phenomenon, advancing technology beyond comprehension and providing access to almost any kind of information anywhere in the world. It has been used in numerous appeals for soldiers missing in action and other abductions, but Madeleine has been the most widely visited and the site has become one of the most popular on the internet.

In the case of Madeline, it spreads the word of her disappearance and can provide developments and updates of the investigation; information which can be provided much quicker than nightly news reports or daily newspapers.

The internet acts as a dialogical medium, with contact between users, and the site can be used as a place for people to provide information who would otherwise not be able to contact the right authorities.

However, using the internet for these means leaves it open to abuses and dangers created by the anonymity of users and the freedom given, providing a person merely has access to a computer and an internet connection.

A lower class?

Media asks the age-old question - why do even scholars see media studies as a Mickey Mouse subject?

Amy Davies Media Reporter

A

s much as media studies has become popular in recent years amongst students, some academics and a lot of journalists continue to question its merits.

Of course the term ‘mickey mouse subject’ has become all too patronisingly familiar to those studying for media-orientated degrees, but is it a fair reflection on course content? Are they ‘serious’ enough and are they ‘worthwhile’ (whatever that is supposed to be)?

Media studies is one of the newest victims of courses met with derision stretching back as far as the 1800s.

When University College London introduced English Literature, it was treated with the same contempt as Sociology in the 70s and 80s and media studies today.

Of course nowadays, English Literature is rightfully treated with the respect it deserves, viewed as rigorous, challenging and most importantly academic. So it would seem, with age,

gravitas is earned by a subject.

Figuratively speaking, media studies is the pimply youth behind the checkout at ASDA, whilst historic subjects such as philosophy are the wizened and respected barristers, consultants and professors.

But whilst the study of the media may be a relatively new discipline, it is important to remember that the media itself is also relatively new.

Given the increasing impact the media has on us both individually and as a society, surely it is worth study. In fact more than that surely it should be inspected and deconstructed. One UWIC student said ‘they don’t always carry the status they deserve and can be perceived as a waste of time, which is unfair when you consider the huge influence the media has on society’.

Perhaps the strangest thing about the criticisms is the fact that it comes from the media itself. The media seems to say of itself that it is not worth study. You may famously remember that the media claimed that David Beckham studies was now a degree option, but on closer inspection it in fact turned out to be a mod-

ule studying the social importance of football for students of sociology, sports science and media studies.

Journalists may be all too aware that media students are examining what they are writing, and they probably don’t like it.

With potential consumers being trained to spot lies, rhetoric and spin it may reduce the amount of readers, and ultimately the amount of profit a newspaper or magazine is able to turnover. So rather than encouraging journalists to step up their game, better to belittle those that question and study them and claim their degree is worthless.

One problem that media studies graduates do face, however, is the fact that there are far more media graduates than there are positions available in the industry. This has led to some panic as to the usefulness of the degree, with one report claiming that skilled workers from abroad

The businesses that have used Madeline’s disappearance are only one example of how the internet can be abused in similar appeals. Websites can easily be changed by users and content can be adapted. People must be wary of the information they receive from the internet, which has become notorious for its unreliability. Facts could easily be changed about appeals which may only hinder an investigation.

The internet has allowed companies to exploit Madeline’s disappearance There is also the risk of exposing suspects over the internet, making them increasingly vulnerable to attacks from the public and the media whether they are innocent or guilty.

Information about these individuals could easily be obtained on the internet, which leaves them unprotected and defenceless. Just the appearance of

were being brought in to the UK to fill the gap left by ‘British youngsters’ preference for ‘Mickey Mouse subjects’. Chris Woodhead, England’s Chief Schools Inspector also harshly claimed in 2000 that media studies is a “one way ticket to the dole queue”.

Professor Drummond Bone from Universities UK disagrees however, arguing that “if our graduates are to take their place in the global economy, it is right that there should be a range of courses on offer to ensure a workforce with diverse, and some cases, very specific skills”.

Surprisingly, even eccentric Tory boy and student favourite Boris Johnson has defended media studies, calling it an “excellent preparation for the real thing”.

The question is however, how many media studies graduates actually want a career in the media and how many simply study it because they are interested in it. Does everybody who studies politics want to be a politician, everybody who studies psychology want to

Robert Murat in the press has led to a trial by the media. Many have inferred guilt upon him and condemned him purely because he is the only named person in the investigation so far, despite no concrete evidence and his continuous denial of any involvement.

The internet can give opportunities to cases such as Madeline’s that other forms of media cannot. With such a diverse audience it is one of the fastest ways to spread a message, and this can be seen with the amount of hits that Madeline’s website has had.

It can also provide a place where concerned citizens can be proactive or express their support. However, it will always be subject to abuses from people who will seize any opportunity to aid their business plans, whether ethical or not.

The overall aim though is to spread the message to many in order to find a missing innocent little girl, and if it succeeds in that there cannot be much criticism of using the web as a means of appealing for her safety. Any criticism needs to be aimed at those exploiting a tragic situation which we can only hope has a positive outcome.

be a psychologist? Why assume that those who study the media want to end up within it? Graduates of media go on to all kinds of sectors including advertising, sales, teaching, law, civil service, PR, the list is endless. If there are more graduates than jobs then the graduates will have to work harder, creating a job market where hard work is rewarded and the standard of work increased. Surely that is a good thing?

Rather than encouraging journalists to step up their game, better to belittle those that question and study them So should media studies be scrapped? Is it a pointless degree with little, to no job prospects? Of course not. Media studies will, given time, be rewarded with the same respect as older subjects have warranted. In fact as the media becomes more and more influential, the study of it can only go from strength to strength. Hopefully, the media itself will soon latch on to the benefits of the study of media and stop the derision. On the other hand, having to defend the decision to study the media can only be good preparation for an industry in which thickskinned determinism is rewarded.

What do you think? Let us know at www.gairrhydd.com

gairrhydd 17

TELEVISION

MAY.28.2007 TV@gairrhydd.COM

Ghandi is OK really, I guess: May 28th - June 3rd

Big Brother: Social experiment?

This is Big Bro, taking over the show

HOT

Festivals: I contemplated w e a r i n g shorts yesterday, so it’s officially Summer. This means that Festival season is just around the corner and I for one could not be more excited. TV Desk is in fact buggering off to one on Saturday as pretentious Indie snobs take over Briz. Yo.

Soaps Neighbours, Everybody needs good neighbours With a little understanding You can find the perfect blend Neighbours... should be there for one another That's when good neighbours become good friends Ooh Neighbours, should be there for one another That's when good neighbours become good friends.

Neighbours, Everybody needs good neighbours With a little understanding You can find the perfect blend Neighbours... should be there for one another That's when good neighbours become good friends Ooh Neighbours, should be there for one another That's when good neighbours become good friends.

NOT

A

feverent and intense debate is sweeping, nay engulfing, the TV Desk this week as Big Brother is back to take over our screens. Oh yes, prepare yourselves for a whole new cast of hapless fame hungry soon to be gracing the front pages of Heat/Closer/I’m-a-bagof-wank-magazine wannabes. The debate itself regards the questionable genius of said programme, and whether it’s appeal could go beyond simply watching fat ugly slags fighting over fat ugly men.

Admittedly, over the years the programme has provided such astonishing ‘characters’ as Bubble, Science and the cultural phenomenen which is Jade ‘the fifth most influential person in the world’ Goody. However, is watching these twats really what you want to be doing with your summer evenings? This is the very question which has torn the TV Desk in two.

The question that the anti-BB side wants to raise (which con-

Fudge Tunnel ✓✕✓✕✓✕

sists of TV Jazz as TV Kyle merely lacks culture and bums the ruddy thing) is: what part of this shambles actually constitutes ‘reality TV’? Let’s look at the facts yarrr?

Thousands of bell-end hopefuls go to various auditions to proclaim how they’re ‘up for anything’ if they ever got into the house. Twats.

The contestants are normally comprised of a token posho, who despairs at the lack of fellow poshos, then you’ll have someone in the transgender category who enjoys shoving bottles of Blossom Hill up his/her fanny, slash anywhere. Then you’ll have an effnic or two. One’ll no doubt be from a council estate ‘cos Big Brother are well anti-stereotype. Then they’re

all chucked into a ridiculous house with cameras everywhere and anywhere, watching their every move for your viewing ‘pleasure’. No thanks, give me a mug of hot milk and my newspaper anyday.

And so, TV Jazz summarises EXACTLY what makes Big Brother ‘the best damn show on TV’!

Ludacris (yes, this word is spelt like the rapper) characters? Sexed up youths in confined spaces?

What could be better? I remember a series not so long ago when they threw in an actual witch! A witch for goodness sake! I thought such characters only existed in works of fiction, but Mary (oh I remember their names) proved us all wrong and succeeded in making everybody HATE her. Throw in a couple of under-the-covers bonks, classic diary room action and a daily round up from the one and only Russell Brand and we have a show which rivals the cultural significance of GHANDI. Yes, you heard me, that little geek never entertained anybody. Bring on the BB xx

Serious Cat Says:

“The key to designing and installing a drainage system in a lawn is to remember that the water must be able to travel from the surface to the drain, which is installed under the lawn.”

Sport So Liverpool went and pissed it all up the wall didn’t they? I don’t really care, and I especially hate the smug scouse twat on gmtv boasting he slept rough in a hotel lobby with his 8 year old daughter with no ticket.

Tosser. However on a happier note I was able to buy a Fiat car radio for about £10. Swings and Roundabouts then eh?

Bring Back...

John Virgo:

This silver fox used to light up the screen on Saturday evenings with his smouldering, middle-distance gazes and seizure inducing waistcoats. He was quite clearly the best thing on Big Break by a country mile, although this is somewhat of a back-handed compliment, as the only other thing of note to appear on aforementionned programme apart from the inbred hicks that actually took part in it, was Jim ‘so thick he has to whistle before having a shit so he knows which end to go through’ Davidson. However ginger racist thugs aside, Big Break was a prime time show about Snooker. A pub game for fuck’s sake. BUT! A pub game that brought us the wonderous white Barry White that was John Virgo.

Also he once got gunged on Noel’s House Party. Bosh.

Metros: I just don’t understand how this place is even open.

You have to be 18 years old to get in, but are you really telling me that people of this age really still like The Offspring?! Oh well, at least the people are nice and it smells good? Think again, go to Clwb and never look back.

TV Grapevine

‘Virgo’ by TV Marshall - today.

T

According to recent reports Lindsay Lohan has been roped into recent saysbian Neighbours storylines where she’ll be making crude and inappropriate fanny jokes, and possibly bonking pegleg Robinson in the process (everyone seems to be). In other news, Shabaz from Big Brother has finally died in a freak blimp accident, the tragedy was described by an observer as “quite funny, but possibly not interesting enough to be considered newsworthy”. Oh well, we disagree...

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19

PROBLEM PAGE

MAY.28.2007 PROBLEMPAGE@gairrhydd.COM

The de Ville’s Advocate This Week: I’m the last of the famous international playboys. Honest.

Social Networking for the Socially Inept...

I must first extend my heartfelt apologies. I had intended to trawl the internet to present you with the finest bachelors/bachelorettes this side of Scunthorpe. I even joined match.com for the purpose of research. Oh, it's a desolate place. You can tick multiple choice boxes to describe your best feature. They even had a box for 'Calves'. I ticked that one. Anyway, I decided that the pub was more inviting than surfing the profiles of singletons. Sorry.

Do you want to know something really great?

I'm going to tell you anyway: I've almost completed my degree. I've done so in a slapdash and shabby and laissezfaire manner, but completed it nonetheless. I'm beyond caring.

Anyway, I celebrated by getting wonderfully squiffy the other night. My spleen was drunk. My face was drunk. The inexplicable freckle on the palm of my left hand was drunk.

Even my little toe was slurring its words. I also may have sat on a car for a while.

Upon awakening, I was blissfully unaware for about forty seconds. I really didn't know a thing. I was alive, but that was about all. People attempt to achieve this level of inner peace by spending all their savings on trips to stay with Buddhist monks in Nepal where they have to sleep on stone slabs and purge themselves three times a day.

Save yourself a tenner or two and just drink a socially unacceptable amount of vodka once in a while. I still feel delightfully numb.

Bridge over troubled water Dear Grace, Last week I was teased incessantly for what I had perceived to be a straightforward and rational fear. While on a trip with my sports team, we made a brief pit stop at a service station so that the coach driver could refuel the bus with petrol and himself with fortified wine.

At least I think it was that way round.

I don’t know what it is about motorway bridges. I’m fearful of heights at the best if times, but the idea of plunging into a mangled mess or (even worse) a deathly pulp and THEN being run over by a heavy goods vehicle really grates my bones.

They look so pebble-dashed and fragile and they were largely constructed in the sixties when everyone was on acid or copulating with people with long beards. Yes, even the women.

Motorway bridges are NOT to be trusted.

Anyway, I was forced into travelling along the tunnel connecting the two halves of the

Welcome Break facilities as of my teammates wanted to visit the Wimpy located at the centre of this tunnel of doom, directly above the swarming traffic. I’d managed to conceal my fear quite well until we reached the fast-food counter.

The smell of offal must have triggered awful feelings of death and despair and I ended up shouting Bad Things about concrete and steel girders and bad meat and people with Rovers. I was literally foaming with fear and rage and had to be carried away by in a fireman’s lift by my baffled friend.

Since then, I’ve been the laughing stock of the entire team and my sporting performance has suffered as a result. I think it might be time to sort myself out. What do you suggest I should do?

A Concerned Athlete Dear Athlete, I’m not a massive fan of the aesthetics of motorway architec-

ture. It’s cold and uninviting. But should a road highway bridge be anything other than austere and grey? If I governed the roads with a glittery fist, everything would be painted in lurid colours and epilepsy-inducing patterns and people would be distracted by the beautiful structures and crash to DEATH and then I’d feel exceptionally guilty have to join a convent AND self-flagellate until the end of my days. It’d be terrid.

So yes, keep them low-key. It’s safer that way. I know nothing of engineering; therefore it would be unwise for me to offer any conclusions on the safety of such constructions. However, Mother once told me that Father proposed to her on the bridge at Watford Gap services. She’s probably lying, but I hope you find solace in the fact that people can make earth-shattering decisions on such bridges and live to tell the tale.

I don’t think this will help. Sorry.

Grace xxx

Festival cheery

I think that thinking is overrated.

The most horrific aspect of the morning was discovering evidence suggesting that I may have eaten half a Swiss roll in the same way that one would eat a chocolate bar. I don't even know where it came from. Oh god, it's truly awful. I'm just going to pretend it never happened. And now I'm drinking Sanguine Orange-favoured Orangina and wishing that I'd just gone for the regular variety because this one is quite reminiscent of acetone and feels as though it's damaging me in at least three different ways. I did actually drink nail varnish remover once, but that's an altogether separate story. Perhaps I'll write about it here sometime.

Grace xxx P.S. I'm plucking up the courage to go next door and ask them if I could possibly collect my stool from their garden. I imagine that they'll have a bemused face.

About two weeks ago when the weather was real and not just a bad headache, I was on the roof of my kitchen and sitting on a silly little white plastic stool. Unfortunately I forgot about all about it and the wind, or possibly a cheeky sparrow, has transported it to the back yard of my next-door neighbour. I hope they think it's been raining seating or that it's a sacred gift from the heavens.

Dear Grace, I’ve managed to get tickets for Glastonbury festival. Problem is, I’ve never been to such an event before and haven’t a clue what to take or what to expect.

The only one of my friends who managed to get a ticket is similarly clueless.

I know it’s all the rage to take lots of drugs and sleep with monsters but my friend and I like our home comforts and have to go to sleep by 9pm. I know this is a bit ‘uncool’, but that’s just the way it is. I want to experience some live music and possibly buy a silly hat.

That’s all. Have you attended such a gathering? I’m not going to get brainwashed by a cult or get dysentery, am I?

Catriona, Roath Hi Catriona, It’s a good job you’ve written to me. I’d hate to think of you sitting in a tent, crying your eyes out because there are bad men outside trying to set fire to it.

These things DO happen. I’ve not been to a festival in many a moon, mainly due to monetary constraints and the fact that large groups of people upset me a great deal. Needless to say, I’ve had my fill of outdoor gatherings and all that they entail. It’s not every day that you can purchase a peacock feather from a fat man in a dressing gown, dance like a twat inside a glass dome while Jason Orange sits in the corner drinking what looks

suspiciously like orange juice and then fear for your own life as nobbers with gas refills arson around your sleeping quarters. Bastards.

Festivals are lovely, there’s no doubt about it. BUT, too many music fans really do spoil the broth, as do wearers of colourful wellies and girls in bikinis and forty-year-old men in angling hats and gangs of people who should clearly be on remand.

You can’t expect EVERYONE at such a huge gathering to be personable. Just avoid talking to anyone, take some antibacterial hand wash and drink a bottle of wine every morning.

Have fun, Grace xxxx

Cottaging is all well and good when you’re in the vicinity of a recreational area, but what happens when you go to a festival? Would it be known as ‘Tenting’ or ‘Tentacling’ or ‘Tentation’? I don’t know; I’ve never been a sexually predatory gay man. Not that it wouldn’t be great. Have a fun examination period and get lots of gold stars. Grace xxx

gairrhydd 21

FIVE MINUTE FUN

MAY.28.2007 FMF@gairrhydd.COM

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CROSSWORD 3

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7. What falls but never breaks?

!"Use empty plant pots as water bowls for cats.

I place them round the garden and let them fill with rainwater. My cats prefer it to tap water. !"Keep your left-over coffee grounds and sprinkle them onto the soil in your garden. It makes a great fertiliser.

If you’re fed up of the ceremonial falafel extracting from every orifice you have, then why not branch out? Be cool, and most importantly stay clean.

Here’s a few tips curtesy of Derek Brockway. What a man...

!"Damp cotton buds are just the thing for cleaning computer keyboards. Dab the buds in a weak disinfectant solution, then run them in between the keys to remove dust and dirt.

!"Save the tops from Pringles tubes and use them as coasters. You can even paint them with enamel paint to add a bit of colour to your table.

!"I just love sewing, but I often find it a struggle to pick up the needles, if I drop them, from up off the carpet. To solve this, I reccommend keeping a magnet in your sewing basket so you can pick them up in seconds.

Found on Facebook

7

10

Household Magic

!"When washing up, I often find that wine glasses smashed when they hit the bottom of my sink. I break at least one a month and, at £2 each, it was

9

11

!

6. Part-carbon, part-water, I am poison to the fishes.

Many falsely claim my name, I am the pause that refreshes.

What am I?

costs me £24 a year (GASP). Then my mum suggested putting a folded tea towel at the bottom of the sink before filling it with water to protect the glases. Genius.

7

6 2

HOW TO PLAY SUDOKU: Fill in the numbers. While I battled cancer, my best mate bonked my Peter. I’ve got the oldest tumor in town. I am the eggman, coo- coo -ca choo.

2

5. Can you name three consecutive days without using the words Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, or Sunday?

3. George, Helen, and Steve are drinking coffee.

3 5

2

1

(answers next week)

5

7 3

4. One door closes, nine open. When nine close, one door opens. What is it?

2. A woman has seven children, half of them are boys.

How can this be possible?

4

8

Riddles...

1. A man walks up to you and says: "everything I say to you is a lie."

Is he telling you the truth or is he lying?

4

7

Bert, Karen, and Dave are drinking soda.

Using logic, is Elizabeth drinking coffee or soda?

12

Put them up at the ‘found on facebook’ group. Make them grim children...

13 14

15 16

17

18 20

22

24

19

21 23

23

ACROSS 1 Army Unit (6,4) 7 Unspecified person (7) 8 Blockade (5) 10 In arrears (3) 12 Hesitate (6) 13 Measure the condition (5) 14 Detest (4) 15 Short haircut (4) 16 Stunt, hoax (5) 17 Noon (6) 18 Exhaust (3) 20 Native American’s tent (5) 22 Haulage cable (7) 23 Norwegian explorer (4, 3, 3)

DOWN 1 Ancient Celtic priest (5) 2 Practical judgement (5) 3 Speed contest (4) 4 Trick (4) 5 Fictional detective, - - - Holmes (8) 6 American state (9) 9 Bad-tempered (6) 11 Like-minded(9) 12 Lady (6) 13 French police officer (8) 18 Chop off (5) 19 Haughty (5) 20 Tough timber (4) 21 Course (4)

smashed

gairrhydd 23

GRAB

MAY.28.2007 COMPETITIONS@gairrhydd.COM

! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN!

WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN

Gangster Rap Love-In

A

pologies in advance for this competition kids as I’m not all that ‘down’ with the Tupac and Snoop Dog ‘thing’.

(Although I must admit I like a little bit of the ol’ Hip Hop on a night out). Something to shake it

to and all that jazz.

So, this week we have a bit of a cracker if you’re a Rap fan. We have a double-disc editoin of ‘Tupac Shakur: Before I Wake’ and also a double-disc of ‘Welcome to Death Row’ to give away to two lucky

readers.

‘Before I wake’ and ‘Tupac Versus’ are the only documentaries to chronicle the last year of Tupac’s life. They contain intimate and upclose footage of Tupac creating some of his music, giving a portrayal of the legend’s life, and lets the viewer decide what really happened during his last moments.

Tupac is famous for his gangster lifestyle, having been arrested for sexual abuse, shooting two policemen and fuelling the war between East and West Coast rappers. The feud fatally ended in 1996 when he was shot four times. No one has ever been charged or publically identified as a suspect.

The film also features interview footage from Russell Simmons and detectives on the Tupac ‘murder’ case.

‘Welcome to Death Row’ gives a glimpse inside the record company industry, like never seen before, revealing the definitive story of the most famous record label Death Row, the home of gangster rap.

Blurring the line between music,

crime and business, Death Row have created the most controversial and talented rappers around including Dr Dre, Snoop Dogg and Tupac.

‘Welcome’ documents the fall of the giant fell after Tupac was shot and Dr Dre left to create his own record label The DVD comes with ‘Eastsidaz’ which is a legendary gangster film featuring Snoop Dogg giving an insight into the LA ganster scene.

The Tupac double DVD is released on June 4 and Welcome to Death Row on June 2.

For your chance to win a copy of either one, email the address at the top of the page with the answer to the following question: What year was Tupac Shakur fatally shot?

A. 1993 B. 1996 C. 1999

Hey folks, I hope all the exams and coursework are going well and you’re beginning to become less of a social recluse. Roll on summer! Make sure you stop off at grab over the next few weeks as we have a festival special where you can win some amazing tickets, as well as a Summer Ball special. Best of luck this week, and congratulations to all the winners over the term.

You’ve got to be in it to win it after all.

YOUniversity Challenge

A

s the summer looms but the loan disappears, we are all in need of some money-making schemes to fund all those festivals, holidays and spontaneous road trips we look forward to during the summer.

Well, Univeristy Choice TV, UCTV to close friends, are giving Cardiff students and students across the UK the chance to win £3000, £1500 and £500.

To enter the YOUniversity Challenge all that entrants have to do is create a fly-on-thewall documentary of their university life,

lasting up to three minutes long using a phone, webcam, digital camera or handy cam.

The video can be about anything, so the creative juices can really flow. How about making a short film using your sports team or society - maybe you could depict a typical night out, (I’m sure the kebab man would love to star in a movie). Or perhaps you could show your course and study life, show off the amazing friends you’ve found at university or the hovels that you’ve had to put up with through your years in Cathays.

Once you’ve decided on your subjects and created your masterpiece fit for entry to next year’s Cannes festival you’ll have to upload the video on UCTV.org.

You can enter right up until June 16 when the top three videos with the most amount of views at the end of the competition will win the cash.

To give you an idea of what will win you the money, you can watch the introduction video and find out more information on the YOUniversity Challenge homepage, or on the YouTube Channel or their Myspace profile.

Best of luck with the creations, and winning the money.

WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN

For your in w chance toess All c c enough As for all your t e k ic Areas t tes this Friday housema ail the usual just em ’ll be first It address. t ser ve so s r fi e com re get in the! ly k quic

! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN!

24 gairrhydd

LISTINGS

MAY.28.2007 LISTINGS@gairrhydd.COM

This week: The fantastic comic Reginald D Hunter; modern dance and mythology with Reginald D Hunter @ Sherman Theatre

Mon. 29 May 7.30pm

Listings Editor Rosaria Sgueglia recommends

T

his week I want to strongly recommend Reginald D Hunter. The show looks at the consumer society in which we live. Particularly focusing on the ‘making deals’ practice.

We make deals in order to get the best pair of shoes, the latest model of car or even the most delicious sandwich.

However, Reginald does not necessary look at these economic deals, but on the ‘unseen and unrecognised’ deals. Those kind of ‘deals’ which establish our family, friends and lovers relationships.

Coming Up

Reginald D Hunter is already a well known face in the TV world, from shows such as Does Doug Know with Daisy Donovan (Ch 4), Drinking Britain Dry (Ch 4), Comedy Store Stand-up (Ch 5), Eight Out Of Ten Cats, and The Comic Side Of (BBC3).

The Sunday Times defined Hunter as “one of the most brilliantly unpredictable comics in the countr”’, while The Observer said the show was “Gorgeously highoctane and thought provoking”.

Iif you are looking for a funny evening, don’t miss Reginald D Hunter and his fab comedy show.

Also coming soon to the Sherman Theatre...

7 June 2007 Tony Robinson's Cunning Night Out. 19.30pm. £15/£12.50.

4 July 2007 Cinderella 7.30pm. £12/£5 RWCMD Students

Sea of Bones @ WMC

Tues. 29 May 7.45pm / £8 / £6 Listings Editor Jenna Harris recommends

T

his week, the Wales Millennium Centre plays host to the contemporary dance work Sea of Bones, which is a departure from its usual theatre and classical fare. Featuring seven dancers, the production introduces mythology - both ancient and modern- into the realms of dreams and the subconscious.

The narrative focuses on the ancient figure of Orpheus, who has become a rock star. However, he is no six string wizard- his instrument of choice is the lyre. Orpheus is in love with the harpy Eurydice but

their relationship is threatened.

Mythology is interwoven into the modern world, with Hades becoming a nightclub, not unlike Metros, that becomes a mysterious, Otherworldly realm, represented by the use of stage smoke (this is the part where it isn’t like Metros).

The piece is a visual cacophony of druids painted in woad, figures from Greek myth and harpies, tied together by its soundtrack, which ranges from Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds to The Kills and PJ Harvey.

Critics have loved it, with The Observer stating: “When the lights go up on Mark Bruce’s Sea of Bones the audience wriggle pleasurably, sensing that they’re in for a good time. There’s beauty there, but horror too. Reverberantly unsettling. Catch it if you can.”

Sea of Bones is an intelligent work with an unusual concept. It takes the best bits of modern performance art and classical mythology, and mixes them to create a piece that occupies a space of its own.

Girls Aloud - 23 May @ CIA...The Who - 1 June @ Swansea...Paul Weller - 20 June @ Newport Centre...Kings of Leon - 5 July @ CIA...Damien Rice - 12 Oct @ CIA... Fflam Festival: Manic Street Preachers / Placebo / Feeder (plus others) - 12-15 July @ Singleton Park, Swansea...

www.gairrhydd.com

Your students newspaper, online

gairrhydd 25

LISTINGS

MAY.28.2007 LISTINGS@gairrhydd.COM

Sea of Bones.

Monday

28/05

Fun Factory @ Solus, SU Cardiff’s own alternative music night. Also features DJing by Oddsoc and bands put on

by LMS in the live music room. 10pm - 2am.

Free entry with NUS. £3 otherwise.

The Jazz Attic @ Cafe Jaz Jam in a jazzy manner with the house jazz trio. All instruments and singers are welcome. £2/£1 if you perform. Arrive early.

Vodka Island @ Tiger Tiger Wales’ superclub. 9.30pm - 2am. £4.

Women Beware Women @ Sherman Theatre Don’t miss this fab Renaissance show.

8pm. £8/£6.

Cardiff Uni Emergenza Showcase: Zenyth @ SU Another week, another Zenyth show in the mighty ‘Diff. This week, the classic rock act are part of the University’s Emergenza Showcase. If you are a fan of Zeppelin then you will like their music. 7pm. £8 /£6.

Pick of the Day Presents Killing For Company / Circle of One & Kardomah @ The Point The Point presents Killing For Company’s first ever live show, which will act as a warm-up before their outing supporting The Who at Swansea’s Liberty Stadium.

How the huge jump from first gig to supporting The Who? Well, since you ask, Killing For Company is the new band of one Stuart Cable, former drummer of that little known band The Stereophonics. The big haired one has forayed into presenting but evidently was never far away from his first love of music. KFC (the acronym, not the greasy food establishment) indicate Cable returning to his rock roots.

7.30pm. £7.

Malefice / Nochaa / Eighthnerve /Engraved In Stone @ Barfly Club Malefice are a five-piece from that melting pot of hardcore rock, Berkshire; heavy guitars and gutteral screaming (think Slipknot). 7.30pm. £5/£4.

Tuesday 29/05 Planet Rock @ Clwb Ifor Bach The one and only rock request night, originating from a Cardiff music society way back.

You ask, and they play the rock, metal and goth classics. You can also request via MySpace.com/planet_rock_club. 9pm - 2pm. £3.

Reginald D Hunter @ Sherman Theatre 7.30pm. £12/£10.

Kenny Driscoll Jam Band @ The Bute Dock Hotel Jazz jam. 7pm. Free.

Forecast Presents: Arrington de Dionyso / Ignatz @ Buffalo Bar Lo-fi ‘slap blues’ from Ignatz, and a mixture of bass clarinet and Tuvan throat singing from de Dionyso. It sounds so good for £5. 8pm.

Sea of Bones: Mark Bruce Company @ Diversions Dance House, Wales Millennium Centre Figures from ancient mythology are interwoven into choreography 7.45pm. £8. / £6.

Away from Her @ The Chapter Arts Centre Grant feels guilty over sending his Alzheimer’s-ridden wife, Fiona, to a care home, which opens up a number of issues.

2.30pm. £2.50.

Pick Of The Day Milburn / The Natives / Armies Of You @ Barfly Sheffield’s latest big thing, Milburn, have been described by the paper of their hometown, The Sheffield Star, as “a band whose style touches on the toughness of Thin Lizzy and the melody of Stereophonics, with maybe REM thrown in.” They have been likened to The Jam and The Libertines, which is always a good comparison to make, and bring their funky selves over to Cardiff to let us judge whether they are any good or not. Visit their website http://www.mercury records.co.uk/milburn/ to check out their sounds. 8pm. £8 /£7 flyer.

Wednesday 30/05

Rubber Duck @ Solus, SU Dressed-up clubbing for jocks and pretend jocks. 10pm. £3.

Popscene @ Clwb Ifor Bach Three floors, three different club nights.

9.30pm. £3.

Cheapskates @ Metros Indie, alternative and cheese, mixed together with £1.09 house doubles.

Oh, and don’t forget the smell of sweat.

Still, it is Metros and the sweaty ambiance is what makes it so good. £6. 8pm-3pm.

Beyond All Reason / SKWAD / The Alternative Ending @ Barfly Previously known as Osiris, Beyond All Reason are melodic. They do that emoscreaming thing. Their guitars are downtuned. The band have also received a lot of positive attention from the media, with Metal Hammer noting that they are “another band who can be brutally heavy in parts yet beautifully melodic [...] Criminally good in fact!”

7.30pm. £5/£4 flyer.

JimJam: @ Clwb Tafod (NosDa), Despenser St, Riverside Live bands and acoustic open mic night.

8.30pm - 1am. Free.

Faith Brown @ St David’s Hall An evening of stand-up comedy from the contestant on I’m A Celebrity…Get Me Out Of Here! 7.30pm. £17.50.

Pick Of The Day Dufus @ Buffalo Bar Indie rock fun. Dufus have been given this exceptional write up by ents24.com, which is so mindblowing that there is now way that I can come up with a spiel of my own.

Instead, I shall faithfully reproduce every golden word: “If you like Captain Beefheart, Frank Zappa, They Might Be Giants, Beck, Talking Heads and all out weird experimental stuff entwined with killer songwriting then this band are worth seeing as a matter of urgenc!”. Of course.

Listings aren’t lazy at all. Not one bit. 8pm. £4/£3.

Friday 01/06

Saturday 02/06

Sunday 03/06

Access all Areas @ Solus SU Another Union event, another way to make people drunk. Promises the best alternative music and beats for you to boogie to. 10pm 2am. £3.50 / £3 adv.

The Dudes Abide indie . retro . legendary sounds@ Clwb Ifor Bach The Dudes Abide offers music that is both retro and modern, classic rock with a bit of soul thrown in. Basically, it’s anything good, from Dusty Springfield to The Rolling Stones to The Smiths. If you like music then you will love this. 10pm. £3.50.

Mad4It! @ Barfly DJ Mike TV comperes an indietastic night of your favourite alternative music, ranging from the Strokes to the Smiths to absolutely everything in between. 10.30pm - 2am. £5.

Son of Dork @ SU Busted reincarnated. James (the one who wasn’t Charlie ‘the eyebrows’ or Matt ‘I’m a Celebrity’ whatever his surname was) presents his latest group. They had a big hit, Ticket Outta Loserville. Now they’re back for all of their teenybopper fans. If you are a 13year-old girl then this one is for you. Contact venue for more information.

Robin Ince Is As Dumb As You: Robin Ince @ Chapter Arts Centre Improvised comedy set from a veteran (randomly, he also wears his glasses well).

7.30pm /10pm. £10.

Alfie Joey / Quincy / Adam Crow / Simon Bligh @ Jongleurs Crow is busy establishing an international comedy career, with a residency established at New York’s Comedy Club. Joey draws on his past careers, which have included being a toy demonstrator in Harrods and a trainee priest, for comedy inspiration. Sounds like it could be an interesting performance. There’s the unusual mix of Caribbean and East End comedy from Quincy, while Bligh heads up the night. Ticket includes free entry to Club Risa.

To book tickets visit www.jongleurs.com or call 0870 787 0707. 7pm. £8.

Come Play @ Solus, SU Union-run night of rock, pop, dance and general debauchery. Party tunes in the main room and Traffic DJing in the side room.

10pm. £3.50.

Fly Swatter @ Barfly Indie party fest that mixes up the best music with the even better. Bring your funky selves along. 10.30pm. £5 NUS. Chicago @ New Theatre The last night of this sassy 1920s stomper of a musical.

5.30pm or 8.45pm. Various prices.

Y Diwygiad vs MC Saizmundo / DJ Dekmashaskicerman (Headcase Ladz) @ Clwb Ifor Bach These North Wales hip-hoppers recently won themselves a session on Radio One’s Bethan and Huw show with their recent EP, The Reformation. Tonight, they’re teaming up with MC Saizmundo. 9pm. £5.

Menage a Un: Richard Herring @ Chapter Arts Centre Herring is a comedian who’s been on a whole host of radio programmes- BBC2's Fist of Fun and This Morning With Richard Not Judy, Radio 4's Banter, and many others, as well as being a success with a show at the Edinburgh Festival. If you want to hear zany introspectives on themes such as solitude and fantasy fulfillment, then he is your man. Critics have rated him, with the Guardian saying: “The man's real-life failures equal considerable onstage success.” 7.30pm / 10pm.

Open Mike (Upstairs) @ Buffalo Bar An intimate and relaxed atmosphere where you can experience live acoustic acts, songwriters and performers, as well as participating yourself. 8pm - 3am. £1.

Aperture - Residents Special @ Clwb Ifor Bach Aperture Two Floor Special. Residents on top floor. Chill out room on middle floor. 8pm.

Steering 2 Music @ The End A string of performances by the latest up-andcoming bands, including SleepGoodFeelGood and Simon Falconer. More acts to be confirmed. 8.30pm. Free.

The Great Music Enquiry @ Glo Bar It’s music. It’s an enquiry. It’s, erm, great.

9pm - 3am. £2.

Angus McBean: Portraits @ National Museum Wales Your last chance to see a collection of works by one of the most significant British portrait photographers of the 20th century. Includes his renowned images of icons such as Audrey Hepburn, The Beatles and Vivien Leigh.

Free.

Pick of the Day Silversun Pickups @ Barfly Club This L.A indie rock band have played alongside the likes of Wolfmother, OK Go and Snow Patrol, and are now set to open for the Foo Fighters during their UK tour.

Last month they were playing the Coachella Festival, this month it’s Cardiff.

8pm. Contact venue for more information.

Pick Of The Day Babyhead / Kid Carpet / Moneyshot / Matt The Hat / Kaptain & Matty Fresh @ Clwb Ifor Bach A selection of local bands featuring Kid Carpet, who recently featured on the ITV music show Earshot and has been described by ents24 as a “one man electronic band, playing broken-hearted modern music, with wit and style (and a few props).” Using kids toys, sellotape and samples from children’s TV to produce electro-pop glory. Also including Babyhead, who, with nine members, are an army of ska, reggae and hip-hop sounds, and the rock covers band, MoneyShot. 9pm. £6.

Thursday 31/05

The Bait Shop @ Barfly For alternative music fans, the Barfly has handily provided this club night, named after the establishment frequented on The O.C. (R.I.P. Seth Cohen and Sandy’s eyebrows), to minister to your musical needs. 10.30pm. £3/2 NUS. Laser Safari @ Buffalo Bar A night of live indie music and DJs. 8pm £4.

Volcano Head: Dr Bunhead @ St David's Hall If you are secretly a child, or you have one, then this show from the ‘insane’ science presenter Dr Bunhead might be for you. He is doing cool stuff with fire in the publicity shot so expect some nifty magnesium-related wizardry. 1.30pm. £10.

Pick of the Day: Alex Horne / Noel Britten / Sarah Millican / Guest Comedian @ The Glee Club This week is a veritable double dose of comedy. Miller has been a stand-up and comedy writer for three years, earning her various comedy award nominations.

Britten is from Bath and has been on the circuit for 10 years, during which time he has honed his signature rapid fire delivery. Horne is a very talented comedian who has already been nominated for a Perrier Award, in 2003 for his solo show Making Fish Laugh. The artists tonight sound particularly good, so Listings definitely recommends. 7.30pm. £5.50 NUS The Unsigned Band Connection: First Among Equals / Lucent / Don The Star @ Callaghan's More unsigned band performances. 9pm2am. £1.

Steering 2 Music: The Hoods / The Strand / The Enormous Sizes / Anthony @ Buffalo Bar Local band fun. Anthony is a ‘space poet’ who performs his stuff alongside Nick drake covers. Go and check it out. 8pm. £4.

VENUES Students’ Union, Park Place 02920 387421 www.cardiffstudents.com Med Club, Neuadd Meirionydd, Heath Park 02920 744948 Clwb Ifor Bach (The Welsh Club), 11 Womanby Street 02920 232199 www.clwb.net Barfly, Kingsway Tickets: 08709070999 www.barflyclub.com/cardiff Metros, Bakers Row 02920 399939 www.clubmetropolitan.com Incognito, Park Place 02920 412190 Liquid, St. Mary Street 02920645464 The Philharmonic, 76-77 St. Mary Street 02920 230678 Café Jazz, 21 St. Mary Street 02920 387026 www.cafejazzcardiff.com The Riverbank Hotel, Despenser Street www.riverbankjazz.co.uk St. David’s Hall, The Hayes 02920 878444 www.stdavidshallcardiff.co.uk Chapter Arts Centre, Market Road, Canton 02920 304400 www.chapter.org Wales Millennium Centre, Cardiff Bay 0870 0402000 www.wmc.org.uk The New Theatre, Park Place 02920 878889 www.newtheatrecardiff.co.uk The Sherman Theatre, Senghennydd Road 02920 646900 www.shermantheatre.co.uk The Glee Club, Mermaid Quay 0870 2415093 www.glee.co.uk Cardiff International Arena, Mary Ann Street 02920 224488 The Millennium Stadium Can’t miss it. www.millenniumstadium.com The Point, Cardiff Bay 029 2046 0873. www.thepointcardiffbay.com

gairrhydd

26

SPORT

MAY.28.2007 SPORT@gairrhydd.COM

Whipping boys play away at Arsenal Dan Tennant-Ralphs, captain of IMG strugglers Euros, proudly reflects on his team’s performance in a 5-a-side competition at Arsenal’s Emirates Stadium

MODEL EUROS POSE: (From left to right) John Foxall, Iain Mumby, Dean Simmonds, Harry Medland, Leilani Dowding, Ray Fearon, Daniel Tennant-Ralphs, John Hazelwood, Stephen Fenn I FIRST HEARD about the 'O2 Fives' competition from the Arsenal mailing list. The email said that members of the public could answer a question about Arsenal’s Ian Wright or Thierry Henry to have a chance of playing five-a-side football at the club’s state-of-the-art Emirates Stadium.

In addition, entrants had to submit their own special ‘keepie-up’ videos and then let the public vote for their favourite one. The designers of the top 16 videos had the opportunity of entering a team in the competition.

I submitted 'Get In There', a very mediocre video of me kicking a ball into a barn which 'managed' to get in the top 16 (you could vote for yourself as many times as you liked. I sent out a couple of emails and made a Facebook group asking people to vote). I was amazed after finding out that my video got enough votes.

On the day of the tournament itself, each team got a free kit bag on arrival with their own unique shirt, shorts, socks and towel.

The competition consisted of four groups of four teams, who were required to play each other once. The top team from each group reached the semi-finals.

We were new to the five-a-side game and were thrown in at the deep end, playing the eventual finalists Freelanders in the first match.

Unfortunately, we lost 2-0.

However we showed great bouncebackability to fight back from 2-0 down to claim a 3-2 victory against FCUK with an own goal, one from John Foxall and a great finish from Steve Fenn. This victory helped us to avoid bottom spot in the league table.

In the final game, we faced Top Gun FC, with both teams vying for second place.

They initially emerged as the stronger side and took an early lead but we pegged them back with another strike from Fenn. But Top Gun soon

broke the deadlock and established a 21 lead.

Yet in the closing stages, I grabbed a late equaliser and secured a point for Euros, leaving us in third position on goal difference. There was also a penalty competition with our player of the day, Fenn, being the designated kicker. Unfortunately he was unable to convert his spot-kick.

It was a great day all round, especially with there being three Gooners in the team. And we were lucky enough to meet such Arsenal legends as Martin Keown, Nigel Winterburn, Bob Wilson and Frank McClintock.

Page Three model Leilani Dowding was also there for eye candy.

Our squad consisted of eight players: Dan Tennant-Ralphs (captain), Dean Simmonds, John Hazlewood, Steve Fenn, Harry Medland, John Foxall, Iain Mumby and Ray Fearon, the token celebrity from Coronation Street, RSC, Harry Potter and Strictly Come Dancing fame.

It was an amazing day for all concerned. We all got the chance to play on a great pitch (incomparable to Pontcanna) and admire such an impressive stadium.

It was also great seeing our name on the Arsenal big screen; the IMG football whipping boys managed to shine on one of the world football’s greatest stages.

There is also a DVD of the event being made. Other highlights included free food and drink, changing in the away dressing room, hearing our team name on the tannoy, walking out of the tunnel, seeing the director’s suite/box, free massages (not utilized by all), various freebies, our warm-up which was led by Nigel Winterburn himself, getting in FHM (out July 1st), proper referees and the O2 Angels (very helpful indeed).

Dan’s video can be viewed on: www.o2fives.co.uk/TopRatedVide oPlayer.aspx?UserProfileID=12

Euros Summary Euros 0 - 2 Freelanders Euros 3 - 2 FCUK Euros 2 - 2 Top Gun FC Euros: Won 1, Drew 1, Lost 1, Pts 4

02 Fives

Group Stage P

W

D

L

Diff Pts

1

Freelanders

3

3

0

0

9

9

2

Top Gun FC

3

1

1

1

1

4

3

Euros

3

1

1

1

-1

4

4

FCUK

3

0

0

3

-6

0

STAR GUNNERS: (from left to right) Leilani Dowding, Frank McLintock, Nigel Winterburn, Martin Keown, Bob Wilson

gairrhydd

27

SPORT

MAY.28.2007 SPORT@gairrhydd.COM

Comment: Sport rates three football finals as we decide what we’ll be watching next season FA Cup Final George Pawley Sports Editor SO, THE FIRST showpiece match at the new Wembley really didn’t justify the occasion. Then again, it didn’t even justify the FA Cup. Tactical geniuses Ferguson and Mourinho masterminded a stalemate brilliantly, but it was not the game everybody wanted.

It was just disappointing that the teams didn’t show just how good they are to the half a billion worldwide audience. Then again, the game was so devoid of interest maybe the tens of thousands of corporate guests may have been deterred from ever watching a Cup Final again; it’s unlikely but we can only hope.

Both teams set up 4-3-3 in attack and 4-5-1 in defence so this literal man-for-man approach meant that Ronaldo, Drogba and Co. had little space to play. Chelsea didn’t have much choice considering their injury situation but Sir Alex could have gone 4-4-2, a formation which has produced some brilliant football in their triumphant league campaign. Rooney was isolated and had no support when he conjured up a few heart-stopping runs through the Blues’ defence.

Most disappointingly of all, Wembley just didn’t feel right for me.

Forget the fact the surface tore up as soon as the players stepped onto the turf, and that when the game actually started, the ball lost momentum in a manner akin to gameplay on a very,

very old version of Pro Evo. The problem is the new Wembley isn’t the old Wembley. Sure, it’s new, has better views, facilities and transport links but watching on TV, it just looked like the Millenium Stadium’s pitch. I already miss the absurdly big areas behind the goals, and what happened to the epic trek from the corner just to reach the pitch as the teams emerged from the tunnel?

Maybe you just need to experience it in person to understand the hype. All that requires is the minor miracle of being able to get your hands on a ticket – maybe I should apply for a job at a City institution or something.

RATING: 2/10

Conference Play-Off Final Pete Evans Sports Reporter

Champions League Final Dave Menon Sports Editor AS THE FINAL whistle blew in Athens, the nation was disappointed. Although Dirk Kuyt’s late strike restored hope among the Liverpool masses, history didn’t repeat itself. Unlike two years ago, this match was hailed by many as a Greek tragedy.

The Mirror claimed the following day that AC Milan committed ‘armed robbery’ (because Inzaghi scored with his arm in the first half), while the Sun also bemoaned bad luck as the reason for Liverpool’s downfall. I guess it just wasn’t meant to be.

But nobody (to my knowledge anyway) has criticised Liverpool manager Rafael Benitez’s slightly negative tactics. By playing Steven Gerrard in the hole behind Dirk Kuyt, Liverpool lacked attacking options.

And the decision to play Bolo Zenden was questionable; the Dutchman was rightly taken off for

RATING: 7/10

The Scoreboard Cardiff won toss UWIC Men’s 1sts Outerbridge c Crump b Walker . .7 Wynne c Cox b Crump . . . . . . .51 Tumadine c Cox b Orr . . . . . . .38 Jarvis b Orr . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .4 Hodges b Crump . . . . . . . . . . .13 Marsh not out . . . . . . . . . . . . .40 Hickerton c & b Bekker . . . . . .10 Day run out . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .2 Hodder c Butterworh b Davies . .7 Cowperthwaite not out . . . . . . . .2 Extras . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .30 TOTAL (for 8, 44 overs) . . . .192 Bowling: Walker 8-2-31-1; Bekker 9-60-1; Davies 9-1-28-1; Crump 90-31-2; Orr 9-0-37-2

WITH TICKETS available for £25 rather than £95, involving players earning £20,000 per year, not every few days, the Conference Play-Off Final had everything the first FA Cup Final at the new Wembley lacked.

Exeter v Morecambe actually had attacking football with end-to-end excitement.

It took Exeter’s Lee Philips 108 minutes less than England’s two best teams to break the deadlock, heading in a beautifully chipped cross at the far post to the delight of the 30,000 fans from Devon.

Next, Paul Jones became the first player to save a penalty at the new Wembley. He would eventually be beaten just before half time when an error let Morecambe striker Thompson barge through on goal and slam the ball over Jones via the crossbar.

Exeter City manager Paul Tisdale

putting in an abject performance.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that Liverpool didn’t play well and deserved to lose. If anything, the Merseysiders were the better side. But Benitez should have used the height of Crouch and the pace of Bellamy for a longer amount of time, especially after going 1 - 0 down. Because when Crouch did make an appearance, Liverpool began to look more dangerous.

Yet on the positive side, the match in Athens was a marked improvement in comparison to last week’s drab FA Cup final. Liverpool showed passion and determination to win at all costs; the same could not be said about Manchester United and Chelsea at Wembley.

And the match certainly was a spectacle. My decision to miss the Apprentice last week was vindicated.

Cardiff Men’s 1sts Lloyd c & b Dilmot-Smith . . . . . .0 Cox b Day . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .35 Butterworth c Hodges b Day . . .3 Bekker c & b Hickerton . . . . .79 Allen b Day . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .1 Symonds-Baig c Hodges b Hickerton 7

Stevens not out . . . . . . . . . . .16 Crump not out . . . . . . . . . . . .22 Extras . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .31 TOTAL (for 6, 42 overs) . . . .194 Bowling: Dilnot-Smith 9-1-28-1; Day 9-1-34-3; Cowperthwaite 8-149-0; Hodder 3-0-15-0; Hickerton 9-1-32-2, Marsh 1-0-12-0; Tumadine 3-1-13-0 Cardiff won by 4 wickets

dared to throw on three strikers in the hunt for the winning goal, a thought seemingly alien to messers Mourinho, Ferguson and Benitez.

This tactical gamble ultimately proved to be Exeter’s downfall though, as Morcombe struck on the counter attack. A route one clearance from, was controlled by Danny Carlton, who letting rip with an amazing arrowing twenty-yard strike worthy of winning any Wembley final.

The drama did not end there; Exeter’s Matt Gill then head-butted his name into FA Cup folklore by becoming the first player to be sent off at the new Wembley.

How refreshing it was to watch two teams bursting with passion, commitment and drive serve up a thoroughly entertaining game. There was no sign of two sides setting out to infuriate and contain each other; this match was a brilliant advert for the Conference.

RATING: 8/10

BUSA Bye Bye for Bath Ruth Smith Cricket Reporter

UNDEFEATED IN the league, Cardiff Ladies cricket team were determined to carry their run of good form into the BUSA trophy.

With high innings scores and superb bowling performances so far, Cardiff were confident they could pass first round opponents Bath University, despite a one league difference in the teams.

Cardiff lost the toss and were put into bat, and due to some excellent bowling by the Bath openers, Cardiff found themselves only 24 for 3 and in a difficult situation.

The first meaningful partnership came from S.Davies and R.Smith, who seemed in good form, but this was cut short after Davies was bowled out by the impressive Bath spinner.

Cardiff knew they would have to

play steadily in the last 15 overs if they were to obtain a high enough score as to give Bath a challenge and this was achieved due to some steady and impressive batting by B.Smith accompanied by captain R.Smith who saw the score board tally up to 103 before B.Smith was eventually bowled out. However, the girls were still not ready to give in and a fiery display of batting by wicketkeeper E.Jones added an extra 15 runs to the total off three overs before being dismissed by an impressive catch at mid-on.

With only six overs remaining R.Smith and J.Shajawani pushed the run rate on further until Smith was caught out for 46 runs. L.Woolfenden and Shajawani saw the team to a total of 134 - 7.

With just over four runs per over required by Bath, Cardiff were aggressive in the field and this style soon paid off with the first three wickets

falling quickly through C.Wray (6-014-1) and K.Hudson (6-0-17-2).

It was however, the truly inspired performance by Davies that ultimately ensured Cardiff the victory as she took six wickets and gave away only six runs in her spell.

From then on it was Cardiff’s game and the long arm of Hudson and textbook fielding by M.Rahid and C.Samson meant Bath found it increasingly hard to score any runs.

The final wicket was taken at 54 runs in amazing style when the Bath batsman slashed at the ball causing it to fly high behind her and into the diving glove of the fully stretched ‘keeper Jones.

An amazing overall team performance from Cardiff puts them in a great position for next week’s quarter-final against Exeter, where victory would gain them promotion for the following year.

Sport gairrhydd

THIS WEEK: IMG team trades Pontcanna for the Emirates Stadium and gair rhydd analyses the recent football finals

CRICKET FIRSTS QUENCH UNI’S THIRST Men’s firsts win BUSA Premier league and make AU history after inflicting a marginal defeat of arch-rivals UWIC Ben Walker Cricket Reporter

CARDIFF CRICKET Club became the first BUSA team ever to win a top-flight competition thanks to a pulsating four-wicket win over UWIC. The victory meant that the Men’s 1sts secured the BUSA Premier League South title without losing a single game.

Their unbeaten run in the league sees them top the group ahead of Bournemouth, who finished second.

Winning the toss and putting UWIC into bat, Cardiff knew that thanks to St

Marys’ who overturned nearest rivals Bournemouth, a win would give them the title. Things didn’t start as planned though, and despite Ben Walker claiming the vital wicket of Bermudian international Outerbridge, UWIC raced to 98 for 1 off 21 overs.

A timely rain break meant the game was reduced to 44 overs-a-side. The break gave Cardiff the chance to regroup, and they gave a far superior performance from then on. Two great spells from Matt Crump (2 - 31) and Ben Orr (2 - 37) pulled Cardiff back into the game as UWIC slumped to 126 - 5.

Despite a slight revival from UWIC, some further good bowling at the death

from Jonny Davies (1 - 28) meant they could only muster 192 - 8 from their 44 overs.

Cardiff’s reply began poorly with two wickets falling quickly leaving them on 17 - 2, a long way away from their target.

This brought in Evert Bekker to join Dean Cox, and once again this pair delivered the goods when it mattered.

A stand of 107 put Cardiff in control and seemingly cruising to victory.

Unfortunately for Cardiff, the dismissal of Cox for 35 led to four wickets, including the vital one of Bekker (79), falling for just 29 runs. This left Cardiff six wickets down and still needing 41 more runs to clinch the

title.

The game was set for a tense finish, but freshers John Stevens and Matt Crump had other ideas. Both stood up admirably against an extremely verbal UWIC side and made 16 and 22 respectively to steer Cardiff to a sixwicket win and the league title with two overs to spare.

In the aftermath of this win, captain Chris Allen praised every member of the squad saying: “I’ve been really pleased with the effort and the commitment of all the lads. Our most important time of the season coincides with exams yet we’ve consistently put out winning sides, which is a testament to the strength and depth of our squad.”

Cardiff University Men’s Cricket squad has had its most successful season ever. The ones and twos are both league champions and both move through to the knock out rounds unbeaten. Everybody in the club deserves praise for this season’s efforts especially 1sts skipper Allen, 2s captain Jimmy Davis and Chairman Ben Orr. Next, the firsts play Loughborough’s second XI at home in the BUSA trophy quarterfinals and the twos entertain Westminster 1s in the last 16 of the BUSA Shield as both teams look to continue this historic season.

Scorecard on Page 31

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