gair rhydd - Issue 869

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ISSUE 869 MAY 12 2008 CARDIFF’S STUDENT WEEKLY free word - EST. 1972

INSIDE...NEWS/JOBS&MONEY/FEATURES/TAF-OD/OPINION

BEAUTY

LUCY

AND THE

CAT ERP ILLA R CAMDEN C MOROCC RAWL GRAnD TH O HITCH EF T AUTO

MGMT

BEAUTY

FASHION

HOW GA

SHOOT

Y ARE YO

Opinion consider the increasing use of tazers by the police

U...?

inside your student magazine: stress less with Quench :: how gay are you? :: reviews :: fashion shoot :: travel hitch-hike to Morocco

PHOTOS: Matt Horwood

DIAGNOSIS: CHANGE William Taylor News Editor This Friday sees the launch of a new Heath Park campus survey to discover the consensus of student views towards the current provisions on campus.

The results of the survey will be used by the Students’ Union Executive to mandate the University and the Students’ Union on how to re-model the current Heath provisions.

Heath students will be asked their

opinions on food outlets, bars and MedClub, and Students’ Union services.

In January 2008 the Students’ Union held an open forum at MedClub.

50 students, five members of the Students’ Union Executive, including the Heath Park Officer and the General Manager of the Students’ Union, attended the forum.

It was a chance for all attending to comment on the current food and bar provision at the Heath, the Students’ Union representation, and the proposals for a University development of MedClub.

The forum was the fourth consultation with healthcare students since the 2004 merger of the University of Wales College of Medicine and the University of Cardiff.

In February 2008, gair rhydd reported that Heath students had voiced concerns in the forum that their requests for a CF10-style café and bar had been ignored.

A need for increased food provision for students, an area separate from patients and members of staff, and increased food provision for students on-site were just some of the requests

that arose from the forum.

Education and Welfare Officer Jo Plummer said: “There are 4,200 students based at the Heath, and the outcome of the development will affect them all.

“Given the contentious nature of the issue, it was felt that the only thing to do was to conduct a mass survey of Heath students, so that the Union would have a clear idea of what the majority of students want.

“I cannot stress enough how important it is for Heath students to complete this survey.”

Results published last week in the Student Satisfaction Survey revealed that 47.1% of respondents based at the Heath expressed satisfaction over the Med Club as it currently stands.

The results also showed that 36.7% of respondents had never used MedClub and nearly all respondents from the Heath called for MedClub to be turned into a facility which would provide hot drinks and food during the day and have a bar in the evening.

Continued on page 4

SPORT/POLITICS/SCIENCE&ENVIRONMENT/LISTINGS/TV

02 gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

NEWS

NEWS@gairrhydd.COM

this week in gair rhydd: Sport: Frisbee triumph at national championship

33 Politics analyse Boris’ Victory

professional alcoholism

Sudoku

12

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PHOTO: Ed Salter

Features on the problems of

fashion

M.A .C. hearts FAFI saw MAC The beginning of March . Inspired and launch its new line - Fafi graffitti artist co-created by the French fantastical of ups herself. Think dressic citites of characters from the eclect as can be Tokyo, Paris and New York, Ronsons Mark seen in Lily Allen and where Fafi creversion of Oh My God, n of Miss Allen. ated a Fafinette versio with the eyes It is all about being bold With the Fafi look and girly with the lips. as you want you can be as out there for yourself. ter charac new a g creatin

Go on... ease yourself into your Monday morning. You know what to do!

travel

On a wing and a prayer:

the Hitch Diaries

This Easter saw hundreds of studen ts defy contemporar y ‘wisdom’ and hitch-hike across the continent in the name of charity. Lloyd Griffi ths recounts his journey to Morocco: warts, perv’s, carpets ‘n’ all…

“T

here are two cardinal truck was slightly daunting to three we made it for our first taste of so sins from which all othhitching virgins, but the journey fl ew called wonderful cuisine- a couple ers spring: Impatience by as his kind demeanour shone and Laziness” according to Franz of Euros for a piece of bread, butter through all the way to Southampton.

Kafka. On that basis, most of my and jam would be the tale of breakWonderful, we were nearly at Portsfirst year has been as sinful as Max fast woe throughout the hitch! Snipmouth with hours in hand before the ing anyone who looked English, Moseley’s bedroom habits, and as we ferry! Magic, this hitch malarkey was a result, me and four of my mates were lucky enough to find a not-soeasy, until we found ourselves walkfrom Cardiff decided to undertak keen couple, and we virtually forced e ing along the motorway to the next the epic task of hitch hiking to our way into the back, with our bags service station, which is (obviously Morocco from little ol’ Talybont !!) on top of us, we could hardly see in illegal, and we got screamed at. search of a cure for these first year and my leg felt like it would fall off After two hours of waiting, the police blues. The charity Link Commun from numbness. It was a massive ity came and we were told to bugger Development has every year since off hitch, permeated by friendly chat the motorway, which we duly obliged 1992 organised the Morocco (and about their kids, and Jess’ ever conto, glad we weren’t spending time Prague) hitch hikes for intrepid at stant saying “You know what I fancy her Majesty’s pleasure. students who want to raise money now?...A cup of tea.” for African school kids while blazSo we made it all the way to ing the open road to fun, faith Bordeaux, in less than five hitches! and freedom. A pretty daunting A good night’s rest followed with task I admit, and one my parents another epic lift the next day- all the were slightly sceptical about (I’m way to near Burgos in Spain from a sure they would have driven me kind couple; they were from Slovenia to Algeciras themselves if I had let and Argentina! Not that a massive them!) lift was seemingly kind enough, And so, on a nervous first mornas we proceeded to stay at their ing, we set out for the open road, flat for two whole days and nights! the sun in our eyes and the cold We drank, smoked, watched dodgy wind on our backs, gently nudgSpanish T.V., had the most epic EasFinally we reached Portsmouth ing us to our first lift, which as it ter meal I have ever seen and were and got the night ferry with Si and turned out was my Dad, as getting generally treated like hitching Gods Gareth, meeting some hitchers who off Colum Road was a nightmare for a weekend. had a free lift to Bilbao on a ferry (much to Gareth and Simon’s anAt this point we were feeling (a) (It turned out to be untrue, we met noyance as we drove past them, pleased that we were destroying them in Morocco and they said he many expletives resonating). As we Simon and Gareth in the race to Mohad lied!), and some Oxford stuflew towards our next lift, Graham, rocco and (b) thinking that the hitchdents. It was easy enough to spot a rambling and kind trucker who ing was easier and almost as quick those on the hitch, everyone wore had James Bond slogans and pic’s as getting a bus or train! However, the recognisable dark green t-shirts splashed across his jazzy truck drama comes and goes while travelwith a picture of Africa and a cheesy (which has been in the seminal ling as quickly as the next lift, and thumbs up on it. We were lucky trucking magazine, Truckers Monthly, we found our next lift in the snow enough to find a short lift from a none other). His early talk about and dark, but not before a seriously his young guy who lived in Le Havre and dodgy encounter. We swaggered into

After avoiding almost definite sexy times with the grizzly men, we nearly encountered the same situation in Burgos

La B ella Vita

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be Shilla

on the impending refurbishment.

The sessions are taking place on Tuesday May 13 from 1.15pm, Wednesday May 14 from 5pm, Thursday May 15 from 1.15pm and on Friday May 16 from 7pm.

The Graduate Centre welcomes students to view a brief presentation and offer an opinion.

No registration is required.

As the designs are due to be submitted on the June 23, and the final submission date for comments is 12 noon on Monday May 19.

Comments can be submitted either by completing comment cards available at www.cardiff.ac.uk/gradc, or by joining the Graduate Centre Facebook group.

antha : Sam S O T PHO

The Graduate Centre Café Bar within Cardiff Students’ Union will be undergoing a refurbishment in Summer 2008.

The venture aims to improve both social and study facilities for postgraduate students.

While currently still in the planning stages of the refurbishment, Cardiff University wish to obtain the views of both postgraduate students and staff to see what changes they would like to be made.

Postgraduates are encouraged to attend the consultation sessions to present ideas and discuss their views

er

Grad centre gets makeover Sian Symons Reporter

03

Cardiff creates green ICT Sarah Powell Reporter Cardiff University is set to pioneer a method to reduce its carbon footprint.

The School of Computer Sciences is joining a European initiative to introduce green IT. The scheme, known as Lifewatch,

is a 15-20 year programme to construct and maintain a computer infrastructure for biodiversity research.

The School of Computer Sciences is also launching a solution to the cost of running super computers, designed for this research, by introducing a project called Arcca (advanced research computing at Cardiff).

This venture aims to initiate the

replacement of power-hungry super computers to smaller, more efficient computers which will help to cut down the waste energy produced.

The scheme has been launched ahead of the need to cull wasteful IT practises in order to reduce the UK’s carbon footprint.

Dr. Hugh Beedie, Cardiff’s Chief Technology Officer, is also involved

in re-designing server racks and air conditioning systems in order to maximise the effects of reducing wasted imagery.

The School of Computer Sciences was selected for its reputation of high standards in biodiversity projects and in e-Science.

The manager of the Welsh e-Science Centre in the School of Com-

puter Science, Alex Hardisty, said: “Joining the Lifewatch consortium is a well-deserved recognition of Cardiff’s collective expertise in e-Science as applied to problems in biodiversity.”

In October 2007, Cardiff University was voted 82nd out of 102 universities in The Times Green League of Universities.

Psychologists 100% take top prize Fairtrade Sian Symons Reporter

Hazel Plush Reporter Two researchers from Cardiff University’s School of Psychology have been awarded medals for their “outstanding contribution” to the field.

The British Psychological Society presented fellow Dr Chris Chambers with the Spearman Award as a public

recognition of his extensive published material.

The Biotechnology and Biological Sciences researcher described his work on human cognition as being “important for perception, attention, and higher cognitive abilities”.

His associate Dr Petroc Sumner, a school lecturer, was also awarded the David Marr Medal from the Applied

Vision Association.

Dr Sumner said: “It is an accolade for the excellence of vision sciences in Cardiff.”

Head of Psychology, Professor Dylan Jones, added: “It is important to recognise that in a School like ours, research excellence is the rule, not the exception.”

One-hundred percent of tshirts that Cardiff University Students’ Union purchases for campaigns will now be fairtrade, a Student Council vote has decided.

The motion was overwhelmingly passed on Tuesday April 29, after the original proposal of buying half of all T-shirts Fairtrade was amended.

The move comes after Cardiff University was awarded Fairtrade status last year.

The Union currently stocks a range of Fairtrade products such as hoodies, chocolate and savoury snacks.

A Union spokesperson said: “We hope that the new focus on

fairtrade T-shirts will provide more evidence for the re-application of its fairtrade status in the next academic

04 gairrhydd

NEWS Overpaying it Hazel Plush Reporter Graduates who have received student loans may be repaying more than they borrowed, the National Union of Students (NUS) has revealed.

In a statement released last week, the Student Loans Company (SLC) was criticised for letting borrowers “overpay” their debts.

Graduates who enter employment repay student loans when their salary reaches £15,000.

But recent problems have seen many people paying back more than the amount they owe.

President of NUS Wales Ben Gray believes that loan repayment schedules should be made as straightforward as possible, so that students can track their progression through the system.

He commented: “What we are seeing is a catalogue of bad administration.”

NUS Research and Policy Officer David Malcolm claimed that repayment confusion was due to information restrictions, but that the SLC is working to rectify the situation.

He said: “It’s possible for any borrower to overpay debt that they have, simply because the SLC doesn’t have that information about the repayments.”

Cardiff graduate Wayne Thomas is aware of the system’s shortfalls.

He said: “I’m having problems working out how much debt I’m actually still in.

“When you get the loans you never worry about paying them back, but this just goes to show you should watch out,” he added.

Higher Education Minister Bill Rammell has assured students that the government will be working with the SLC to improve the repayment scheme.

The news comes after last month’s announcement that over £730,000 in loans and grants was awarded to students in prison.

Both cases are still being investigated.

MAY.12.2008 NEWS@gairrhydd.COM

Spotlight on crime gair rhydd Campaigners lobby for lighting FREE

in Cathays’ crime-scene area

Ruth Smith Reporter A petition has been started which calls for the installation of street lighting in the Cambrian Point area, following a recent spate of crime there.

In April 2008, gair rhydd reported the alleyway behind Cambrian Point to have been the scene of several muggings.

Now members of the community have rallied together with the hope that introducing lighting to the currently dark path will reduce crime in the area.

The petition is being organised by students and will be shown before Cardiff City Council.

Local Cathays Councilor Jon Aylwin has offered to present the petition to the

council.

As of last Thursday April 8 support had reached around 350 signatures.

But some local residents do not agree with the proposed lighting plans, claiming it could affect their privacy.

It is hoped that if lighting were installed it would be low-level, in order to cause minimum disturbance to nearby occupants.

The amount of security at Cambrian Point has been increased since the recent muggings.

But Caty Matterson, the Cardiff University student behind a Facebook group promoting the petition, still thinks more can be done to improve safety in the area.

She said: “Ideally, CCTV would also be an enormous improvement. Students should also have more awareness

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VARSITY

of their own safety.”

A paper copy of the petition is curA rently at Cam- toll the results from last week’s urnament p.4 0-48 brian Point reception.

An e-petition can also be signed at http://www. gopetition. c o . u k /

5 VICTIMS 5 ATTACKS 1 DAY

Investigations street robber continue into five ie within 24 ho s which took place ur areas of Cath s in the student ays and Roat h

SPORT/POLITI

PHOTO: Ed Salte

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ISSUE 867 APRIL 28 2008 CARDIFF’S STUD ENT WEEKLY free word - EST. 1972

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T H E CITY

B-BOY

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HIGH COB-GIRLS NTRAST AL FIE AL

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PLUS: EUAN FE SAVE TH RGUSON E POIN T!

THIS ISSUE: bre akdancing high contrast save the point urban for mality shoot

William Taylo r News Edito

been threatened r with All of the victima knife.

Police in Cardi s had person including mobil street robberiesff are investigating five e phones and wallet al items Detective Inspec s stolen.

24 hours in Cathathat took place within of Cardiff Centr tor Chris Mullane, head ys and Roath al CID, said: The robberies .

“I would like to reassure the 1am on April 16 occured between 9pm and community that Cathays are safe and 17. places, and patrol Roath and Attacks were been increased made on both s have also and Bruce Street Lucas Street in the area to provide extra reassurance.” .

There were two Aline Ungewiss, Road and anoth further assults on Maindy er student, was walki a third-year Journalism New Zealand Road.between Crown Way and ng home on of Wednesday 16 when she was the evening Three males have the police stoppe been arrested and for further inquir bailed to look who warned her and her boyfrid by es. out for “a gang end The victims of of young hoode males”. d between 16 and the attacks are all aged 24 and three Since 2007, Speci students. of them are al Police Const Tappenden has been heading up able Sam Student Liaiso Police n the Offi Student cer PC Bob Keoha Initiative, a group was quick to emph ne claim has which the Police helped in the overa not related to the asise that the attacks were ll reduction of crime in Catha victim ys.

The two on Wedn s being students.

Tappenden has esday 16 took in close proxim offered advice place who may ity, be concerned follow to students each other, which within five minutes of ing the recent assaults. has led PC Keoha believe “there ne to is the attacks cameinformation to suggest that from the same youths”. group of However PC Keoha Continued on ne stressed that was definitely page 4: “crime going down in Cathays” and the recent spate of area, which usuallattacks was unusual for the gair rhydd investigates y has low crime street robbery. rates for stud ent safety and Victims of the alleged assault, attacks were all subject to reviews Car two of which diff’s crime claim to have stat istic

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CS/SCIENCE&

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No money for the midwives Hazel Plush Reporter Final year midwifery students in Wales are struggling to find jobs, a recent survey has revealed.

The study, by the Royal College of Midwives (RCM), showed that less than 10% of those hoping to graduate this year had secured a midwifery post.

Out of 170 respondents, only eight percent of final year students said they had a job offer, while 58% of those without work said they were not confident of finding a post.

Head of the RCM in Wales Helen Rogers said: “Midwifery in Wales has been an all-graduate profession for some time now.

“However, the RCM is aware that student midwives are under considerable financial pressure.”

The UK-wide report revealed that one in 10 student midwives had accu-

Welsh midwifery graduates struggle to find work while crippling under accumulating student debt

mulated debts of between £7,000 and £9,000 while in training.

Newly qualified NHS midwives currently start on £19,683, which can rise to £31,779 after nine years of practice.

The RCM is now campaigning for £10,000 bursaries to help student midwives through their degree.

Lynn Jones, a 29-year-old final year student at the University of Glamorgan, expressed concern about getting a job after graduation.

She said: “There are limited jobs out there. There are people from my university who qualified as midwives last year and still do not have jobs.”

Dame Karlene Davis General Secretary of the RCM added: “This survey confirms what we have been saying for some time – that morale amongst student midwives is declining because of their accumulated debts and uncertainty about job prospects.”

Analysis at the Heath Continued from front Some respondents also indicated that they would like to see similar services to the Students’ Union brought to the Heath, including the IT Shop and the JobShop.

Shelley Humphries, a second year Medical student, said: “The facilities at the Heath definitely need improv-

ing. The library needs expanding, with more computer rooms and generally more space for students.

“I think it is unfair that the facilities on the Heath campus are not nearly as good as those inside the Students’ Union,” she added.

Another second year Medical student, who wished to remain anonymous, goes to MedClub fortnightly for sports socials.

She said: “I don’t want them to get rid of MedClub because it is a good venue for students to have, but it does need to be updated and be more spacious to allow for more people.

“I will definitely take part in the survey because the Heath campus issues have been going on for so long and there have been so many meetings about them, but nothing ever happens.”

Plummer said that the Students’ Union Executive will “act on whatever the results of the survey are”.

“I hope that this survey can make steps to repairing the relationship and together we can work to improve the student facilities at the Heath,” Plummer concluded.

gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

WORLD NEWS

NEWS@gairrhydd.COM

Chunky monkeys Sarah Powell Reporter Monkeys are contributing to a global obesity crisis, Japanese reports have claimed.

In Ohama Park, Japan, the Macaca Mulatta monkeys are not heeding such recommendations, with many of them becoming seriously overweight.

Apparently, this has been caused by visitors offering the monkeys various snacks, bread, or leftovers from their meals, resulting in shocking weight gain.

Officials have said that around 30% of the animals are so huge that they cannot even manage to roam around their 420-square-metre enclosure.

To get an accurate comparison of how large the monkeys have become the Environment Ministry says that the average male Macaca Mulatta monkey weighs roughly 20lbs, compared to the heaviest male at Ohama Park, which weighs in at 4st.

Ohama Park has no official zookeeper.

It is reported that the problem went

Iconic festival attracts record attendance Hazel Plush Reporter New Orleans has hosted its iconic annual Jazz and Heritage Festival, attracting record attendances and worldwide acclaim.

The city’s 39th event showcased more than 350 bands and musicians, boasting huge crowds despite torrential rainfall.

Traditional Motown and New Orleans Jazz made a welcome return to the stages, but were joined by more diverse genres ranging from Gospel to South American Salsa.

Motown legend Stevie Wonder topped the bill of the seven-day event, returning to the festival after a 35-year absence.

Other famous names included Elvis Costello,

05

Santana, a n d N e w Orleans’ most famous export, The Preservation Hall Jazz Band.

The event provided a welcome boost to the local economy, raising over $300 million (£152 million).

The festival is a welcome turning point in the post-Katrina recovery, but reminders of the 2005 natural disaster remain.

The tents, which are still occupied by hundreds of families, were pitched close to the festival site) creating a timely reminder of the city’s ongoing redevelopment programme.

undetected until visitors began reacting to the monkeys with insults and pitying comments.

To try and tackle this problem the authorities are currently deciding whether to erect a fence around the monkey enclosure.

In the meantime, visitors have been warned against feeding the monkeys, who have been put on a strict diet to help them lose weight.

But some say the measures are not good enough.

Akira Kato, Chief of the Japan Monkey Centre, maintains that strict regulations should be put in place to prevent visitors from throwing food into the enclosure.

He also argued that giving animals an unrestricted supply of food is tantamount to abuse, because it has severely restricted the monkeys’ health, as well as their mobility.’

The Park says it takes allegations of animal abuse very seriously, and officials are doing all that they can to help the monkeys to return to their normal size.

Shipwrecked Spain demands treasure salvaged by the United States in the North Atlantic be handed over Abigail Whittaker News Editor The Spanish government has claimed the rights to $500 million (£255 million) worth of treasure salvaged by the US from the North Atlantic.

In May last year Odyssey Marine Exploration retrieved some 17 tonnes of gold and silver coins from a shipwreck.

Spain is now suing the Florida-based organisation, claiming that the sunken ship was Spanish and that Spain is, therefore, the rightful owner of the treasure.

According to James Goold, a U.S. lawyer who is representing the Spanish government, Spain has proof that the vessel is a famous 19th Century Spanish galleon.

The location of the shipwreck, the nature of the treasure found at the site, and the way this was dispersed on the seabed are said to prove that the treasure had come from a Spanish warship, which British ships sunk in 1804.

The evidence was submitted to a Florida district court last Thursday.

In documents filed with the court, the Spanish government said: “The sinking of Mercedes was a pivotal event in Spanish and European history, and the

site and its contents are the inalienable historical heritage and patrimony of Spain.”

Odyssey Marine Exploration has kept the exact location of the site, which has been nicknamed the Black Swan, secret, but says that it lies in international, as opposed to Spanish, waters.

Head of the treasure-hunting firm, Greg Stemm hopes that a “collaborative solution” to the long-running dispute with Spain can be found.

He commented: “It is the belief of our lawyers that Odyssey should still receive a generous salvage award.”

Stemm also told media sources that if the wreck was in fact that of the Mercedes, the Spanish government would still have to prove that it had not “abandoned” the site.

The Mercedes formed part of a squadron of four frigates that was one day away from reaching the Spanish port of Cádiz on October 5 1804, when a British fleet attacked it.

The galleon was blown apart in a huge explosion and the other three ships were seized by the British in the battle, which two months later prompted

World News in brief Ruth Smith Reporter

Feline freeze

In Sacramento, California, police have unearthed 300 dead cats lodged inside freezers at a man’s home.

30 cats, which were still alive, have also been removed from Michael Louis Vondueren’s home by animal control officers.

Three freezers were said to be crammed full with the dead cats, and the house in which they were located was also full of cat faeces.

Vodueren’s 81-year-old mother was also residing at the house.

Internet crime

An unnamed Japanese civil servant has been demoted after having been discovered to have logged onto pornographic websites more than 780,000 times over a period of nine months.

The man, who is a city government employee in Kinokawa, Western Japan, visited porn sites from June 2007 to February 2008, a city official has revealed.

The man’s conduct of behaviour remained undetected by his colleagues, even though he accessed the sites during his work day.

The man has also received a pay cut.

Spiky situation

A man in New Zealand has been accused of wielding a hedgehog and using it as a weapon upon a teenager.

William Singalargh, 27, hurled the spiky animal at a 15-yearold boy in the North Island town Whakatane.

The animal was discovered dead but it is unknown whether it was alive when thrown.

The boy received cuts upon his leg and Singalargh was arrested and charged with assault using a weapon.

14 gairrhydd

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OCTOBER.22.2007 FEATURES@gairrhydd.COM

gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

EDITORIAL & OPINION

OPINION@gairrhydd.COM

freewords Est. 1972

Changing times Cardiff Students’ Union (CUSU) and Cardiff University have a busy year of renovation to look forward to.

With detailed plans being presented at Tuesday’s Student Council (13 May) for the Junction bar revamp, it is clear that CUSU is not afraid to change in order to make the best possible use of the space in the Students’ Union.

It’s good to see that this culture of improvement has been taken on by the University in its plans to refurbish the Graduate Centre in Summer 2008.

Student consultation is clearly key for the developments in the Grad Centre, and provision has been made for wider student consultation.

Student consultation is also something that is being improved by the SU in its development of the final plans for the future of MedClub.

The MedClub redevelopment, a collaborative project between the Union and the University, has been ongoing since the merger of Cardiff University and the University of Wales College of Medicine in 2004. Since then gair rhydd has been reporting on the deadlock that has characterised discussions between students, the Union and the University over the future of MedClub.

Little has changed in the MedClub saga over the last two years, and insufficient student consultation has been cited as a major factor. An online survey is therefore hoped to reach more students on Healthcare courses and see some action up at MedClub.

Whatever the results, the redevelopment of MedClub will certainly take place this summer. It is therefore vital that students take this opportunity to influence the future plans of the building.

An apathetic response may easily render the Union and the University unsympathetic to the pleas of students for a say in the matter.

The MedClub redevelopments are much more tangible for the student body because their results will be witnessed within a year. The plans are relevant to all students, but particularly students not in their last year.

It is important to emphasise, however, that even if plans will not directly affect you in the future, having your say in your University experience is a founding democratic principle of the Students’ Union. Your right to have a say in any changes is indisputable. It is absolutely key for the future of the SU that any changes that are made are made in the best interest of students - and who better to suggest the changes than the current students at Cardiff University.

As for the powers that be, consultation is all very well. But without direct action based on the results of that consultation, the Union is flouting the most basic rule of its constitution and the University is doing a disservice to its students. Consultation is vital and listening is imperative.

The next 12 months will be integral to the future of student services in Cardiff, from the future of Solus to the progress of the Graduate Centre. It is your responsibility, as students, to make your voice heard. Whinging when things don’t turn out right is far, far too late.

And let’s send out a clear message to next year’s Students’ Union executive: listening to the students will be the key to success in any planned redevelopments. Your responsibility is to listen to the 25,000 students of Cardiff University and hold the management of the University to account. Accomplish that and you’ll have proved yourself to every student that voted for you.

07

Tazed and confused Georgia Burdett is concerned about the increasing use of tazers by the police. She explains why

“T

his is a tazer. It can fire 50,000 volts, and it will be used against you if you do not comply.” How many people would fail to ‘comply’ when threatened with enough volts to power 25 electric chairs or 1/2000th of the volts of your average bolt of lightning? (Granted, it’s the high level of amps that would kill you quicker than the volts, but still, the thought is literally shocking!) Statistics show, however, that many people would still rather risk severe injury, and in some cases death, than ‘face the music’ when confronted with the mighty hand of the law.

Tazers were introduced to British police forces in 2003, and since then have been used to subdue suspects in over 800 incidents across the country.

The stun-guns worryingly resemble your run-of-the-mill firearm, and fire two needle-tipped darts into the subject within a range of 15 feet. The electric cables that trail back to the handset allow the high electric charge to (ideally) cause ‘temporary’ paralysis of the target, so that he or she (statistics show that tazered subjects are usually a ‘he’) can then be suitably restrained by officers.

People do not consider firearms to be ‘safe’ because they’re not supposed to be Until now, the 3000 tazers issued in Britain have only been allocated to police firearm specialists because they were originally classed as firearms. The problem is, whoever heard of a nonlethal firearm?

People do not consider firearms to be ‘safe’ for the simple reason that they’re not supposed to be. If firearms were safe, then what purpose would they serve? They are weapons, and the purpose of a weapon is to damage or destroy, or at least to threaten such action. This is why the use of tazers should remain severely regulated, used by specialists (I do not consider a specialist to be someone who has attended a basic two-day course) in extreme cases, and then only until a more humane method of restraining ‘nutters’ has been Editor Amy Harrison Deputy Editor Ben Bryant Co-ordinator Elaine Morgan News William Taylor Abigail Whittaker Samantha Shillabeer Corinne Rhoades Investigations Lee Macaulay Politics Tim Hewish

TAZERS: Coming soon to a police officer near you established.

Amnesty International insists that the use of tazers is potentially lethal, and that there have been numerous deaths because they have been misused. Spokesperson Mike Blakemore insists, “You need trained firearms officers who not only know how to fire a tazer, but when it is appropriate to fire a tazer.” In the States there have been instances where an autistic boy and a group of 12-year-old schoolgirls were tazered for unruly behaviour in the classroom, as well as a hysterical pregnant woman.

I’ve highlighted these particular instances because there has been no extensive research into the after-effects of tazering on the brain, and anyone with the most basic medical knowledge would agree that to perform such treatment on such vulnerable groups of people is extremely risky. I would suggest that tazers are often unnecessary and are brandished through impatience and the incentive of achieving a desired outcome quickly with very little effort.

Editorial and Opinion Jamie Thunder Emma Davies Columnist Josie Allchin Sport George Pawley Jack Zorab Stephen Florey Pete Dean Scott D’Arcy Listings Josie Allchin Dan Jones Letters Emily Akers

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However many ‘real-life’ scenarios police recruits go through, they are never going to know the health risks of using a tazer on a particular person.

Tazers are always used in highly stressful situations where an electric shock could easily induce cardiac arrest. Do tazer-trained officers take into account the age of a target? Whether he or she is under the influence of drugs? Or, even, whether he or she appears to be in good enough health to withstand an electric shock? I seriously doubt it.

Police are never going to know the health risks of using a tazer on any particular person The case of Nicholas Gaubert proves my point. Gaubert fell into a diabetic TV Mariam TV Tim TV Sarah Lonely Hearts Queenie Five Minute Fun Narelle Picture Editor Ed Salter Online Editor Paul Springett Sub Editor Graeme Porteous Proof Readers Aisling Tempany Laurel Burn

coma whilst on a bus in Leeds in July 2005 (a week before the police shooting of Jean Charles de Menezes) when he was tazered by officers not once but twice after he failed to respond to their instructions. When he momentarily regained consciousness he noticed that another officer was holding a real gun to his head. It was only later in the police van that officers noticed the diabetic dog-tag around Gaubert’s neck and realised his hypoglaecemic state was a medical emergency. Needless to say, the Crown Prosecution Services has not held the officers accountable of any offence against Gaubert.

It becomes apparent that the instances where tazers are used, and by whom, at present leaves a lot to be desired.

Tazers are not safe, so neither is the way they are used. It’s increasingly difficult to understand how, 50 years after the abolishment of capital punishment in Britain, the Home Office still struggles to distinguish between torturing ‘criminals’ and apprehending them.

Neil Fairbrother Kieran Harwood Azzedine Bouleghimat Contributors Sian Symonds, Sarah Powell, Hazel Plush, Ruth Smith, Georgia Burdett, Ted Shiress, Sam Hubble, Emma Davies, Ceri Isfryn, Chrissie Owens, Vanessa Preston, James Hinks, Rachel Harris, Lisa Franklin, Richard Jeffries, Matt

Horwood, Ben Walker, Roz Lambe, Nadia Cracknell, Ian King, Dyleth Marshell, Jon Hillard.

Address University Union, Park Place, Cardiff, CF10 3QN Web www.gairrhydd.com Email info@gairrhydd.com Advertising 02920 781 474 Location 4th Floor Students’ Union

08 gairrhydd

OPINION Cardiff, Disability and me

MAY.12.2008 OPINION@gairrhydd.COM

Glastonburied?

With Jay-Z set to headline and tickets still available After an weeks after release, Sam Hubble asks if it’s all over online furore, for Glastonbury

Ted Shiress answers back

T

ime to go all Daily Mail on you; so, this column is about homosexuals and socialists and what poo-poo heads they are!

(Joke.) My last but one column was, at times, unnecessary and I apologise, since it did cause a surge of comments, some quite hostile, on gairrhydd.com. However, I will stand up anywhere and insist that the idea of sex in relation to disability should be made public. What I do feel slightly bad about is how I wrote the piece.

I missed a great opportunity to write a risqué but golden and informative column about sex, as I could not mute the voice shouting “GOOOAAAALLL!” I did address a few issues, but I feel I did not do this as well as I should have. I feel confused that people complained about these issues. For instance, applying contraceptives, in particular, is something that many people would not consider, and the embarrassment of having to ask for help may be unfamiliar to most – although, I accept, more about embarrassment and less about eruptions was needed.

The same applies for letting the woman take full control. There was no need for me to elaborate on the problems with this, as people could work it out. However, the fact that it is an issue for people with disabilities such as mine is also a valid point, which I feel needed to be made.

I’d like to say a few things to various commentators on gairrhydd.com – in particular, Lara and Len. Lara took the column’s comment virginity, while, I feel, ignoring the ‘be gentle, it’s my first comment’ ethos. Then Len pushed forward a view that I should not need to differentiate people in such a way.

Lara: would it be too forward to say that I think I’m falling for you? You are a double-C, aren’t you? Christian and Conservative? Well, I’m sorry that the mention of sex upset you so!

However, I feel your anger left your comments rather shallow; unfortunately, sex and (for some) casual use of soft drugs are part of student life.

Sorry. Plus, you complain that this column seems to be about me: a) I try every week to get other people’s opinions and fail, and b) look at the title; can you see that last word? It’s not ‘others’; it’s ‘me’.

Len: a lot of the time the idea of issues such as sex and drugs for people with disabilities do not cross the mind of many able-bodied onlookers.

Believe me, I’d love it if they did.

Also, a general point: yes, this column is sometimes smutty, rude, vulgar and rather personal. However, I know that there are few things worse than reading someone go on about their disability and how depressing it is. So, I try my best to counter that!

G

lastonbury is a sleepy town in Somerset, home once a year to a massive festival which is historically one of the best annual gatherings of rock from major UK and global headline acts. Just last year The Killers, Arctic Monkeys, Arcade Fire, Kasabian and Kaiser Chiefs headlined, to name but a few.

For some reason, however, the organisers seem to have gotten it wrong this year.

For a predominantly indie and rock festival, American rapper Jay-Z seems, at best, a bold, controversial signing. At worst? Just plain barmy.

In the festival planners’ defence, it is important to try to reach out to all styles, but I think they’ve shot themselves in the foot with this signing.

At least Jay-Z is current, with a large fanbase in certain demographics, but when I heard that Shakin’ Stevens had been contracted I nearly fainted! What must have been going through their minds in allowing some clapped-out, talentless old man to massage his ego in front of thousands of rock fans, many of whom probably haven’t even heard of any of his songs? Bizarre.

At worst? Just plain barmy So, is the festival dead and buried?

Many die-hard Glastonbury fans have boycotted the festival this year in disgust, and it is true that tickets, costing a hefty £155, have been slower selling

PYRAMID STAGE: controversial line-up? than usual. Surely the atmosphere and overall ‘Glasto’ experience – music, (drugs), alcohol, (sex), mud and massive toilet queues (or the shameless ‘bottle’ technique if you can’t wait – should be enough to save its reputation?

Admittedly, £155 seems quite a lot of money to see a handful of very good acts, a selection of average ones and, sadly, quite a few acts which in better years would not have been invited to play at the event at all.

Certainly there are better line-ups

at the summer’s other festivals: in particular, Reading/Leeds and T in the Park. It seems to be near enough impossible to get hold of Reading tickets, which, I guess, proves its popularity.

£155 seems quite a lot of money Glastonbury, though, is surely the spiritual and historic home of the UK’s festivals, and hopefully will

come through this year with its reputation still intact.

One positive from the situation is that it is easier for people who haven’t experienced Glastonbury before to get the chance. Even though it may not have as good a line-up as usual, I think that it still promises to be a great festival, and as I was too slow in finding Reading tickets you may just see me in a tent in darkest Somerset, fully clad in waterproofs and singing Shakin’ Stevens at the top of my voice with an old hippy couple!

Mind your manners

Is Britain getting ruder? Emma Davies weighs it up

A

pparently Britain, as a nation, is getting ruder. So says the general public, anyway. We are allegedly far less mannerly than we were ten years ago, with swearing, spitting and personal stereos on public transport apparently the worst offenders. Is it really all that bad? Have we turned into a land of hoodies who don’t know how to mind our Ps and Qs? In some ways, I’d say yes. Excuse me while I age myself about 50 years here, but I swear that kids these days are getting worse and worse. My absolute pet hate is those stupid little trainers with wheels in the heels – or ‘heelies’ as I believe they are commonly known.

Whenever I see a child zooming around a shopping centre on them, I have to control my Tourettes-like twitching as I resist the urge to give them a damn

like listening to their shouted conversations with Doris; if I should switch it off, so should they.

good shove.

Yes, they’re a toy and toys are fun, but whatever happened to the old adage of “there’s a time and a place for everything”? I blame the parents – if I’d demanded to wear my roller skates into town as a child, my mum would have told me not to be so daft, and rightly so. Any more of that nonsense and I’d not be allowed to play on them when I got home.

Have we turned into a land of hoodies?

Old people are just as bad, especially on buses. It’s their free bus passes; they now think they own the entire bus. Dare to sit next to them (because there’s no-

What happened to “a time and place for everything”?

where else to sit!) and they tut, glare and refuse to move up an inch, leaving you to cling on for dear life when turning any treacherous corner that happens to come up. If you’ve got an iPod on?

Even worse. Okay, maybe they don’t want to hear my choice of music. Then again, maybe I don’t particularly feel

Despite all this ranting, I don’t believe it’s anywhere near as bad as The Daily Mail would have you think. For every screeched chav obscenity on a street corner, there’s two “nice to meet you”s when making a new acquaintance. For every brattish child, there’s an “excuse me” from a stranger to restore your faith in humanity. If we all mind our manners and watch our dirty mouths, maybe there is hope after all.

gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

09

LETTERS

LETTERS@gairrhydd.COM

letters@gairrhydd.com Dear gair rhydd, Like many other students, I’m eagerly anticipating the chance to get suited and booted for the Summer Ball this term.

I queued for half an hour (the champagne was a nice touch) to buy my ticket on the first day of sale.

I was shocked to find out last week, however, that postgraduate students will be afforded a “VIP Postgraduates Only Marquee” at the Summer Ball according to www.cardiffstudents.com.

What basis is there for this VIP area being opened up for the possibility of the students’ union attracting postgrads who just wouldn’t go? While we’re at it, why don’t we make a VIP area for

international students or, even, students from one school of the University because that’s what this initiative is equivalent to doing.

Surely, the Summer Ball is meant to be about uniting the students, especially the new graduates, of Cardiff University.

Having a VIP Postgraduates area does nothing to help this.

Postgraduates complain that they aren’t included in the university community and that the undergraduate drinking culture doesn’t appeal to them but nothing will change until each group works towards each other.

So postgrads, leave Grad bar, come down to The Taf for a drink and stick around outside the VIP area.

Us undergraduates don’t bite.

Disgruntled second year

the

Not-so-Comic Sans Dear gair rhydd, What was that thing on page 18 of last week’s issue? Of course, I didn’t understand all the Welsh bit but the advert underneath took my breath away.

But not in a good way. Fair play to Cardiff University using bi-lingual advertising for their Student Summer Residences in Talybont but using Word art for them? Really?

Are you telling me that a Russell Group university that commands the most research grant money in the whole of Wales can’t afford to get a halfdecent designer to make their adverts for them?

Can’t they get the people who designed those massive ads on the side of Cardiff Buses to do half a page in a

tabloid? It’d only cost them a few bob here or there surely?

But the worst crime against design of them all is using that dreaded font, Comic Sans MS. The kind of font your kid brother/ sister uses when they first discover the Internet and decide to make their own Bebo or Myspace.

The overuse of Comic Sans is so legendary that nearly no one, especially creative types, will touch it with a bargepole these days.

Room for improvement, Cardiff Uni. First year computer science student

Lucky Glamorgan

Thomas Carroll : May 6, 09:55 pm Just like to say, the plans look sweet and everyone should try and get a look at them if they can (or wait to be pleasantly surprised in September).

Anonymous : May 8, 01:00 am You reckon? I have to say I was really disappointed with them, seems that the union is turning more into a conference and banqueting facility in the long term (this doesn’t necessarily involve Solus I guess) than Cardiff University Students’ Union.

Jon : May 8, 11:48 am Why do you need to go anonymous to say that?

I know that there was a student satisfaction survey, but were students consulted over the proposed designs or even given a choice from a number of designs as to which they would prefer?

Thomas Carroll : May 8, 11:50 am Conference and banqueting facility? Are you havin’ a laugh? I’m gonna assume you’ve never actually seen a conference and banqueting room before because the plans for Junction change what is today an under-used row of couchs and smelly toilets into a cool, comfortable looking cafe/bar area and it’s gonna be a lot better come next year.

anonymous : May 8, 01:02 pm I would advise you think long and carefully about these plans. They are not as great as you may think at first sight. Trust me. Have you seen the plans for the rest of the Union. The conference and banqueting facility is too much of an understatement.

Eventually the only place to drink will be the Taf. The Great Hall is going to be a shitty lecture venue with no space for concerts and Solus is going to be a lunch venue. Woo. anonymous : May 8, 01:05 pm I also ask... how many students answered the satisfaction survey. and how many of those even use the union anyway?php?event=discuss&st ep=discuss_edit&discussid=2450

Cardiff, Disability and me · Issue 868 Mark : May 2, 05:12 pm I think you make the course as hard to you need too. A lot depends on personal circumstances, especially one’s intelligence and natural ability. A very old friend of mine is doing his PhD in Physics, and he’s the type of chap who can understand Hawking. He’s that intelligent. He can knock out a 20,000 MA dissertation in a few days and get a first for it. I’m similar in my field, it took me a week to write my MA thesis after I had spent a week researching on and I got a first without breaking a sweat as I was working five days a week. No problem.

Put me in front of an article dealing

with astrophysics and I’ll turn into a jibbering buffoon, likewise put my friend in front of an article dealing with the differing interpretations to the American Revolutionary Wars and he’ll probably spend all day trying to figure out an equation that will solve it. On the other end of the scale, I know people in my course who worked their arse off just to get a 2:2, as I suspect many people in the sciences do, and these people are either in the wrong course or just plain stupid.

The truth is that if you’re at least of reasonable intelligence and you’ve chosen your course wisely then you should find it easy enough to get 2:1’s without even trying and Firsts with only minimal effort. If you can’t then you’re probably in the wrong course or university just isn’t the place for you.

Jon : May 3, 12:49 am Instead of writing a long drawn out essay, I will just summarise my points (and I’m talking from a humanities perspective, as that is what I’ve experienced): 1) 2:1 (60%) essay = B/A grade essay at A-level (in my opinion) 2) If you can’t consistently write essays to a 2:1 standard without a struggle then you really need to question your appropriateness for being at university.

3) A 2:2 doesn’t cut it anymore when there are so many people with degrees, so what is the point in spending so much money on sending people to uni just so that they can get pissed?

4) Getting 60% is easy, you just regurgitate arguments already in the field and add your own opinion to it. Getting 65%+ requires a bit

Graham, Cathays

Dear gair rhydd, I’ve read some of the comments on

This week a few of you had a few concerns regarding the union plans and Ted’s column is still causing a stir...

Facelift · Issue 868,

by Abigail Whittaker

Facebook about Glamorgan coming to the Summer Ball Please stop whining.

Cardiff Students’ Union is going to put on a much better ball than you could ever imagine having done at Glamorgan.

I’m not trying to be mean but we’re a much better funded union and we can afford to hold a ball in Coopers Field not Jumpin’ Jaks as Facebook suggests your alternative could have been.

In the future, though, I think it would be great for more co-operation between Glamorgan and Cardiff, after all the Leeds Universities’ Summer Ball is widely seen as one of the best balls in the country and that comprises of a partnership between all three Leeds Universities.

forum

more effort because it involves a bit of analysis, but still not difficult.

Getting 70% is slightly more difficult because it requires an element of originality. However, considering that the university tells you exactly how to get a 70% mark it should still be in the realms of anyone’s capabilities. Getting over 70% is more difficult and that is where any effort should be made.

5) You should consistently be getting 65%+ for your work to merit being at university.

6) In conclusion, if you can’t overview historiography and add your own opinion without breaking a sweat and thus achieve a 2:1 then you really shouldn’t be studying at university.

Rachel : May 4, 11:35 pm —

gair rhydd

FREE

ISSUE 868 MAY 05 2008 CARDIFF’S STUDENT WEEKLY free word - EST. 1972

INSIDE...NEWS/JOBS&MONEY/FEATURES/TAF-OD/OPINION PHOTOS: Ed Salter

Very Important Postgraduate?

Junction Bar: INSET Bustling

by night, MAIN Empty by

day

FACELIFT

Abigail Whittaker News Editor

Cardiff University Students’ Union (CUSU) has unveiled plans to develop social space and improve food provision in the building.

The proposed changes, which are scheduled for completion over the coming summer months, will modify the Junction Bar and Buffers in Solus.

Junction will be redeveloped into an open-plan learning environment, which will operate until early evening and feature a glass front to provide access to a balcony and outdoor seating.

The main structural changes will include a relocation of the toilets into the main nightclub and the removal of the bottle bar to make way for a food provision area.

A new staircase will be installed to provide easy access from Buffers (back

room in Solus) to CF10.

In addition, the renovation will create small working areas and comfortable seating zones with internet access.

However, the layout and the décor of the area are yet to be confirmed.

The plans have been commissioned recently following the publication of results of this year’s Student Satisfaction Survey, in which the Union building was described as tired, claustrophobic and in need of a facelift.

The move comes in preparation for the utilisation of the Great Hall as a part-time lecture theatre from September 2008.

Increasing competition from venues in Cathays and the city centre has also led to a recent decline in the Union’s commercial trade.

Considerations for food provision are still in the initial stages, with detailed market research set to be undertaken in the coming fortnight.

The SU’s Communications Department have been tasked with conducting face-to-face market research out on the street to discover whether or not students would like more food and drink provision and, if so, what kind and at what price.

A web-poll and the use of Facebook will also aid the investigation.

CUSU President Jonny Cox said: “The Student Satisfaction Survey provides the Union with priceless information about the experience students are having in the Students’ Union.

“As you can see from the new plans for the Junction area, we are already acting upon this year’s results.”

The sabbatical officers, who form the board of directors of CUSU, initially approved the plans.

A proposal was then taken to Student Council on Tuesday April 29 and passed by approximately 40 students.

The project will be paid for out of

Union ‘reserves’, which are designated for one-off projects.

Funding will then be derived from Union capital, so that the overall cost can be spread over several years.

A Union spokesperson said: “We do hope that in time other areas of the Union will be improved, but this is an independent project.”

Work is expected to take place between June and September while students are on holiday.

But there is a foreseeable clash with the graduation club-nights that the Union puts on in July.

Union officials are aware of this issue and, if necessary, construction work will be boarded up so as not to impinge on the events.

As yet no contingency plan has been confirmed should the work be incomplete at the start of the academic year 2008-2009.

But executives have reassured stu-

dents that deadlines will be discussed with potential contractors and, should completion before the restart of term be impossible, then the project will not be embarked upon.

CUSU Vice-President Rowena Vassallo supported the changes.

She said: “We hope to create a more vibrant Students’ Union with a brighter, more welcoming atmosphere at all times of the day.

“We hope that a more diverse range of students will spend more time in the Union, as we will be able to provide more places to relax in during the day as well as at night.”

Let us know what you think.

Have your say at www.gairrhydd.com

SPORT/POLITICS/SCIENCE&ENVIRONMENT/LISTINGS/TV

I’ve worked hard to increase my marks from the 50s in my first year to roughly 65% now, and fully intend to continue working hard to improve my marks throughout the rest of my time at University. Surely, apart from nurturing existing geniuses, a main function of the university system is to educate people and encourage them with their studies.

I find the fact that you feel people who are not consistently achieving 65% in every piece of work, frankly, quite insulting.

Not only do you have to remember huge amounts of complicated information for many subjects, but adjusting to the desired way of presenting it can be quite a challenge for people who may not be Stephen Hawkings or Richard Dawkins, but nevertheless are intelligent people.

I should add that I’m not a humanities student, so I’m commenting from a biosciences perspective.

Got something you would like to say?

Log on to gairrhydd.com or email: letters @gairrhydd.com

14 gairrhydd

FEATURES

OCTOBER.22.2007 FEATURES@gairrhydd.COM

gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

POLITICS

POLITICS@gairrhydd.COM

Boris the Entertainer?

S

o now we know – Boris is the new Mayor of London by a margin of 139,772 votes. To a mixed applause within City Hall Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson stepped forward, having shook the out-going Ken’s hand, and took to the podium to deliver his victory address.

What were we expecting from the man with “that floppy hair and sodding bicycle,” to quote one not so amused Guardian polemicist? He shuffled around in his inner jacket pocket striving for his victory speech and perhaps scrunching up his words of defeat in the process.

The expectation that a load of a piffle coupled with a number of Boris witticisms would fall out of his mouth never really came into being. Yes he did congratulate the ‘knocker-uppers’ of the Conservative supporters, which could have been misconstrued; however, he trundled on prefering to congratulate the other two men in this ‘strange triumvirate.’

He gave his approval to Brian Paddick, the Lib Dem candidate, heaping the praise of ‘common-sense’ and ‘decency’ upon him and wished he would work with Paddick in the future on police matters.

Now turning to Ken, journalists felt Boris would produce a tirade of attacks ranging from bendy buses to Ken’s newt-like resemblance; however in an out-of character approach he used a more mild demeanour in which to describe Mr. Livingstone.

He crafted his words extremely care-

11

Such honesty twinned with sharp humour is a distant reality for people in public office.

fully, but they felt somewhat genuine in delivery by referring to Ken as a ‘very considerable public servant and distinguished leader.’

Boris went further to the astonishment of the Press, as this was no more Boris the Bumbling Buffoon, more like a budding Statesman carving out the tone on which to set his precedent.

Ken was now the man ‘who shaped

the office of Mayor’ and who possessed ‘sheer exuberent nerve to stick it to his enemies,’ without forgetting sly remarks about those enemies in New Labour.

The biggest praise he bestowed on Livingstone was the acknowledgement that Boris wanted London to benefit from Ken’s ‘transparent love of London,’ this sort of rhetoric is usually un-

seen in a race viewed as an old-school battle between Tory and Labour.

If you were looking for a warrior’s speech in his final sections you would be adrift for examples with Boris preferring to state: “I do not for one minute believe that this election shows that London has transformed over-night into a Conservative city.” This realistic approach is refreshing in a political climate that has been branded out-oftouch with the public; telling it how it is was certainly a generous admission by politicans often devoid of clear utterences.

Boris’s unrivaled command for the English language did shine through on occasion as he ‘thanked the vast multitude that voted against me’ and for those who did noted “I know there will be many of whom whose pencils hovered for an instant before putting an X in my box,’ such honesty twinned with sharp humour is a distant reality for people in public office.

Despite what I firmly believe was a speech of sheer quality and candor, the knives are already being sharpened ready to attack Boris, subsequently his first 100 days in power will be crutial.

With headlines like ‘It was the Standard wot won it,’ in light of the paper’s

vigour in which it went after Ken and thus supposedly handed Boris victory, he has to prove his worth boldly and unashamadly.

With a meeting with New York Mayor Mr. Bloomberg on the horizon, this will allow Boris insights into how a Republican won election and later re-election in an overtly liberal minded city, is much akin to his own finely balanced position as a centre-right Mayor in a London that is positively cosmopolitian.

Yes, London will be a ‘laboratory for the Conservative agenda, to test the waters of public opinion on certain policies,’ but Boris will need to imprint his own stamp of authority into the minds of Londoners.

The Mayor’s Fund for London is a start in the right direction to help out the disadvantaged and disillusioned youth and so are policies to reduce crime and public nuisance on the streets, tubes and buses of London.

A ban on the consumption of alcohol on public transport implemented last week will no doubt be one of many similar ideas.

Certain sections of the media may always judge him on his TV antics or slip-ups in his journalistic utterences; however, from now on, Boris’s evaluations will be on what he practically does for London, not on his thoughts of Liverpudians or supposed piccaninnies.

Boris is no longer the court jester, but time will tell if he is more like the king who presides over the court or the clown prince.

Tim Hewish

12 gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

FEATURES

FEATURES@gairrhydd.COM

THE DOCTOR’S LIMIT

As 1 in 15 medical professionals has a drink or drug problem, Ceri Isfryn investigates if ‘work hard play hard’ medic school is at the root of the problem

Y

ou’re only an alcoholic if you drink more than your doctor.

I recently heard this “joke” being said on TV, and it was evident from the speaker’s nervous laugh that he was only half-joking.

It wouldn’t be an understatement to say that the problem of alcohol and drug abuse in the medical profession is huge.

The Brirish Medical Association (BMA) estimates that one out of every 15 workers in the medical profession will suffer some kind of alcohol or drug related problem during their career. On top of this two out of every three disciplinary cases forwarded to the General Medical Council (GMC) are alcohol related.

The ‘work hard, play hard’ ethic seems to be ingrained into most of the country’s medical schools, and most of the Cardiff medics I questioned for this article said that exact phrase in response. So can the worrying figures about alcohol abuse in the NHS be attributed to lifestyle patterns set in med schools?

A first year medic commented: ‘I think we only party as hard as we work, but there is a certain degree of pressure to live up to the medical student image. I don’t necessarily think we drink any more than any other student though.’

However, it seems that qualified medics aren’t drawing the line between what’s acceptable as a student and what’s acceptable as a professional.

Mari Jones, a Cardiff medic, observed that ‘being in lectures for long hours means we get to know our comedics well and so we tend to go out in groups after to relax.’ Such long hours, both at University and in employment mean that such limited socialising time is bound to spiral into bingeing.

Medics are three times more likely to obtain cirrhosis of the liver than the rest of the general public, second only to bar staff and publicans.

Huw Morgan Jones, a third year Cardiff medic, commented: ‘There’s less chance for us to go out so I guess when we do go out we drink a lot more than students in other subjects.’

The medical profession is stereotypically seen as well paid, and the

Chrissie Owens reflects on her experiences with alcoholism

doctors and consultants’ hefty wages appear to adhere to this. However, they don’t get the pay packet for nothing: with it come hefty responsibilities.

Doctors who fear they have a problem suffer a potentially fatal Catch 22: if they admit to their problem, they risk loss of reputation and responsibilities built up over the lengthy training

Professional medics behaving like students is unacceptable period.

Moreover, unlike other highresponsibility jobs such as pilots or train drivers, drinking restrictions in the NHS are lax. It seems that having a policy on paper is not enough; it needs

I

lost my father to alcoholism when I was just 18. Like many younger alcoholics he was a professional person who, before addiction took over his life, enjoyed a successful yet unfortunately highly demanding career as a GP in North Wales after graduating from Cardiff Medical School in the seventies.

Because of his position as a doctor, my father never felt he could get the help he needed for his illness from the people he wanted to help him.

to be put in place.

A member of the BMA commented: ‘I think the pressure of medicine makes doctors a vulnerable group but also a group afraid of seeking help through fear of stigmatisation and possible backlash from the GMC amongst others for making such an admission. It is also a problem for students as drinking is now so imbedded in University life.

That is where the Medical students committee have worked at trying to reverse these trends and traditions by encouraging non-alcoholic related events. Limiting happy hour/night offers is our next major step.’

What doctors and nurses do in their own time is ultimately their choice, although every effort should be made to help them out of work just like any other patient. However, if stricter rules on drinking before work were enforced in the hospitals, at least fewer lives would be at risk.

He passed away in April 2008 from end stage liver cirrhosis. Living the lifestyle of a young professional brings a lively social life, and for many this is a way to relax after a hectic, often stressful and emotionally demanding day of work.

Unfortunately it is becoming increasingly common for young professionals, especially doctors, across Britain to need treatment for addiction and other mental health problems, such as anxiety and depression.

In a world that still judges some-

I doubt it helps that hospitals seem to be ran by administration rather than medical professionals who empathise with the day-to-day strain of being a

Long work hours and limited socialising spirals into bingeing doctor, nurse or consultant.

A BBC study found that between 1995-2005, 750 NHS hospital staff in England were disciplined over alcohol and drug related illnesses, yet this figure is based on the reported cases only.

NHS employers told the BBC they thought this was below the true figure.

Ethics Committee chairman Michael Wilks said the profession was in denial. Dr Wilks said: ‘You’ve got

“The most difficult thing is to seek help when you risk losing everything”

levels of denial in the profession that makes it virtually impossible for an alcoholic doctor to be helped. ‘ Perhaps the greatest problems lie with the perceptions of doctors by us the general public. Doctors are sometimes seen as God-like figures. At the end of the day, not even seven years’ training gives them all the answers.

When the doctor assumes the role of the patient, who do they go to if they seek confidential and impartial advice?

Not many of us would feel comfortable seeking a colleague’s advice for a problem which still appears to be taboo.

Despite the existence of a few charities and help lines, notably The Sick Doctors’ Trust, there appears to be a lot of susceptible professionals and students struggling under the stress of being a medic. Treating illnesses is why doctors become doctors, treating patients in today’s society appears to

one for suffering from addiction, it is one of the most difficult things to do: to seek help when you risk losing everything you have worked for.

For this reason, at my father’s funeral we asked that people who would like to make a donation in remembrance of my father do so in the name of The Sick Doctors Trust, so that talented people and their families can seek the professional and confidential help that they need before it’s too late.

gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008 FEATURES@gairrhydd.COM

Deaf Awareness Week

13

FEATURES

5th-11th May

To mark Deaf Awareness Week Vanessa Preston gives gair rhydd the facts on university life for deaf students

W

e’ve probably all had a conversation that went ‘which would you rather be, blind or deaf.’ But when we’ve said that we’ve probably never really though about the actual facts or consequences of being deaf.

With Deaf Awareness week, perhaps its time to look at some of the issues of deafness.

A person can become deaf for a number of reasons. Some deafness is genetic, but it can be caused later in life as a resulf of exposure to regular loud noise, or head injury. The effects will vary from person to person. Some hearing loss can be instant, though more likely it takes years to become completely deaf.

BSL is used by 50,000 people in the UK and has its own regional variations just like English does The effect of being deaf on an individual is affected by the origin of their deafness. Research has shown that those who become deaf in later life often struggle more with their condition than those born with it. That is often because those born deaf often have other deaf relatives they can related to. The other reason is often because those who lose hearing find it hard to adapt to the loss.

Like with many other disabilities, being deaf is a struggle at university, and very often, people will find that the hard work involved just being there is too much. I once worked in a coffee shop where a deaf man frequently came to eat. Every week my co-worker would lean over and shout ‘Sorry, what did you say’ as he tried to repeat himself a bit louder and clearer.

I was stood next to her one time and

asked in sign what he would like. If a person faces that difficulty just asking for a large tea, then imagine what difficulties need to be overcome to ask a lecturer for help on essays.

Deaf students, like dyslexic students, often struggle with grammar and spelling in essays, and Cardiff University does allow for such mistakes in its marking of work. (If in doubt, contact the Disability and Dyslexia Service at Student Support.)

Hearing aids obviously make life a lot easier, but, as a friend pointed out to me, hearing aids can sometimes mean you hear a cacophony of indistinguishable sounds, in among what you actually need to hear, and few lecturers speak through the microphones in the lecture theatres.

Future Hearing Loss The likelihood of becoming deaf in later life is increasingly common, and the current generation are particularly at risk. Exposure to loud noise is one of the most common ways for deafness to occur.

Listening to music on an mp3 player at very high volumes for more than an hour every day or loud phones (call-centre work) can cause hearing loss, as can working in very loud bars and clubs. Some places will provide their staff with hearing plugs, as a precaution.

Tinnitus is the most common, and while not immediately serious, can gradually worsen. While not solely caused by loud noise, this is the most common cause of tinnitus.

Recently the Royal National Institute for the Deaf (RNID) ran a campaign titled Don’t lose the Music to encourage the use of ear plugs in clubs. There are simple ways to prevent hearing loss. The easiest is to turn your music down on your mp3 players. Some mp3 players have sound levels beyond what is actually safe for your hearing. Chances are, if

people walking past you can tell what you’re listening to word for word, it is too loud. That doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy your favourite songs, only be aware how much and how often you use it.

If you work in a pub or club, as many students do, it’s advisable to invest in high quality ear plugs. Some clubs provide them nowadays for staff who work long shifts, but others don’t.

Prices start from about £15, which is a small price to pay to be able to hear: www.dontlosethemusic.com

Sign Language Sign language was first created in Spain in the 17th century, and was later adapted in France by Charles Michel de L’Epee in the 19th century, from where it spread to America and other nations.

One of the most common misunderstandings about Sign Language is that it is the same everywhere, because it’s not spoken. BSL has it’s own regional variations, just like English does, and the USA have a different sign system entirely. It’s alphabet is one-handed, whereas the BSL alphabet is twohanded. Some of its signs are due to

One of the worst ways to try and communicate with a deaf person is to SPEAK LOUDER. it’s origins in the French language.

Sign Language is the most familiar form of deaf communication. British Sign Language (BSL) is a recognised language in the UK, used by around 50,000 people, but because it has no official status, like Welsh, Irish or Scots Gaelic, it isn’t taught at schools or is as easily available to learn.

Only two UK universities offer BSL as a degree option: University of Central Lancashire, and University of Wolverhampton. This obviously limits its usage among non-deaf people.

Learning is often expensive, and Level One BSL (there are four levels) until very recently, required a pass mark of 80% to go onto Level Two, which severely limits any interest or usage among non-deaf people. My own experience of learning Sign was very rewarding though, and did make my efforts to communicate with deaf people easier, even if I didn’t get 80% or above.

It was also very difficult though.

People who rely on sign language to communicate often face the challenge of dealing with a disability too. It can be very easy to forget that they have to use their hands and face to express and communicate all the time, whereas you can often easily lapse into oral communication, and just easily ask someone else.

One of the worst ways to try and communicate with a deaf person is to SPEAK LOUDER. Another is to give up and ask someone else about them.

And yet these two things frequently happen.

Useful Information www.dontlosethemusic.com RNID Information on hearing loss caused by music and loud noise, and how to prevent it. www.rnid.org.uk/bsl RNID clips of BSL http://bda.org.uk British Deaf Association Website. With more information on the Deaf community Cardiff University Disability and Dyslexia Service: Student Support Centre 50 Park Place Cathays Cardiff CF10 3AT OR 2nd Floor Cardigan House Heath Park Cardiff CF14 4XN

For every 10,000 people: 10

will be born profoundly deaf. They probably get little or no benefit from Hearing Aids and mainly use Sign Language to communicate.

20

will have become profoundly deaf. They may use Sign Language and probably also lipread.

100

will be partially deaf. They may have difficulty following what is being said, even with hearing aids. Mostly they will lipread and some use sign language as well.

600 will be hard of hear-

ing. They will be able to follow what is being said with a hearing aid and will be able to use a telephone if it has an adjustable volume or has been designed to be used with a hearing aid.

800 will be mildly hard

of hearing. They may have difficulty following conversations particularly in large groups or in noisy situations. Some will wear hearing aids and many find lipreading helpful.

2

About million people in Britain wear hearing aids and maybe another million would benefit from doing so.

14 gairrhydd

FEATURES

OCTOBER.22.2007 FEATURES@gairrhydd.COM

gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

15

SCIENCE & ENVIRONMENT

SCIENCE@gairrhydd.COM

Devastation in Burma James Hinks Reporter

O

n May 2, Burma was hit by a devastating cyclone, which has left the Irrawaddy Delta under water, destroyed Ragoon (the largest city) and left 22,000 dead and 41,000 missing.

The situation is becoming increasingly dire as poor access and lack of supplies mean that the secondary effects of the cyclone are inevitably going to increase the death toll.

Moreover, the effects of cyclone Nargis may be exacerbated by the insular nature of the Burmese government who fear he mass intrusion by foreign nations may impede some of the international aid.

The cyclone is the second deadliest cyclone of all time after Typhoon Nina; it hit Burma with wind speeds

of 165km/h and brought a 3m tidal wave that engulfed lower lying villages. The cyclone crossed Burma picking up pace, reaching peak wind speeds of 215km/h, eventually imploding and dissipating on the Burma Thailand border.

The tragic statistics are indicating that the effects of cyclone Nargis could be similar to that of the Indian Tsunami. Some foreign aid workers believe the final death toll could be near 100,000, because millions are homeless and without basic facilities, resulting in starvation, disease and illness.

The Burmese Government Junta are under major scrutiny from charities, governments and their people, who believe that the warning system was inadequate and that the government acted passively and in some cases criminally in the immediate aftermath of cyclone Nargis.

It has been reported in Thailand that prisoners in Burma were shot by the guards as they tried to escape from the flooding. The Junta Government has also not implemented a sufficient system to get rid of all the dead bodies. They have been left strewn across streets and in the delta.

This is not only traumatising for the public but also a major threat of the spreading disease.

UN’s humanitarian chief John Holmes has said that the Burmese Government are “moving in the right direction” as more and more aid is allowed to the disaster zones.

Cyclone Nargis has already been a major humanitarian catastrophe, and many hope that the Burmese government can put ‘politics’ aside and allow for international unity to shoulder the burden needed to benefit and rescue a forlorn and devastated nation.

Could mobile phones be worse than smoking?

James Hinks asks whether society is taking the radiation risks of mobile telephony seriously...

A

Dr Vini Khurana has concluded that using mobile handsets for more than 10 years could double the risk of brain cancer... this is a potential catastrophe as 3 billion people own mobile phones

s a nation we are bombarded with a plethora of modern gadgetry, most of which we do not totally understand the full capabilities of, but buy none the less for fear of being without the newest of new gadgets.

Mobile phones are certainly the most popular invention due to the fact that they are hugely practical. There are added bonuses like cameras, music, internet (the ability to facebook on your phone is a major selling factor), but essentially the ability to communicate with anyone while on the move is pretty damn useful.

There has always been a concern over the radiation generated by the phones and the masts; and as award winning cancer expert Dr Vini Khurana proclaims; Continuous usage of a mobile is worse for your health than smoking, should the 3 billion users of phones be more savvy with their calls?

Khurana has made a bold statement after many years of studying the effects of the radiation and looking into case studies of brain tumour patients; he has concluded that using handsets for more than 10 years could double risk of brain cancer. Khurana notes that: “there is a significant and increasing body of evidence for a link between mobile phone usage and certain brain tumours”. If the building evidence is correct then this is potentially a global catastrophe, as 3 billion people own mobile phones and people are starting to use them at younger ages. Khurana fears that “Unless industry and government take immediate and decisive steps malignant brain tumours will be severely increased”.

Some Governments have made official movements. Both the French and German governments have advised minimal use. It could be argued though that this is too small an action to combat the huge promotions that advertise constant calls by giving away huge amounts of ‘minutes’ free with contracts. The mobile operators association have claimed that the research is “a selective discussion of scientific literature by one individual”. The basis of their argument seems to be that because only a minor amount of scientists have advised against use then therefore the research must be minor in significance.

It should be noted that Khurana has noted that ‘over use’ of mobile phones as quite extreme, an individual has to be using it for hours and hours a week and for decades before any major damage can occur. Though this is becoming more feasible for the next generation who have started using phones at a very young age, much younger than previous generations and as the usage becomes more popular Khurana’s fears that damage may become reality.

It is easy to become apathetic to health scares in modern society, where they are a regular occurrence and normally exaggerated. Mobile phones are very useful and to stop using them would be impossible. If there is evidence to show that over use of mobile phones can cause cancer it is probably best to cut down on the minutes and be more vigilant on the usage than turning a blind eye and bundling the claims into a file named ‘something not to worry about’. Surely the pure fact that mobile phones are a modern gadget means that we do not know the long term effects.

16 gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

JOBS AND MONEY Graduate

B

ethan James, 23 graduated with a BSc (Hons) Speech and Language Therapy in 2007. She now works as a speech and language therapist in Caerphilly.

What is your job title?

Speech and Language Therapist.

Where are you based?

Gwent NHS Trust, based in Caerphilly District Miners Hospital.

Briefly describe what your job involves, i.e. your day to day responsibilities.

Working with adults, mainly outpatients, and inpatients in the acute setting.

The outpatient setting requires me to see patients who have been referred with various voice problems.

My role requires me to assess and provide these individuals with therapy.

A lot of the patients I see are professional voice users such as call centre staff, teachers, singers and general overuse/ misuse of the voice.

The inpatient setting requires me to assess individuals in the acute setting, for dysphagia (swallowing problems) and communication difficulties, a lot of the patients I see have had strokes or progressive disorders (e.g. MS, Parkinson’s disease).

How did you go about applying for your job? Briefly describe any interview or assessment process that you went through.

I applied for the post through the NHS Jobs website last August. Around 35 people applied and 4 were then asked for interviews in September.

The interview was with three people, two heads of the trust’s speech and language therapy team and one woman from recruitment.

The interview lasted 30 minutes; it consisted of around 6 questions, mainly clinical questions, specific to voice and communication difficulties.

They phoned me two days later to tell me I didn’t have the job! I then had a phone call around 2 months later to ask if I wanted the job.

The girl who got the job couldn’t commit and never started, so I happily accepted.

What is the best/worst thing about your job?

The best bits are meeting new people everyday and building up a rapport.

Every day is different so you get a range of new experiences, it’s good money and I have a supportive team.

It can be a little depressing on the wards when you get to know the patient and family well, and the patient passes away, but you learn to detach yourself.

What advice would you give to students thinking of entering a similar field?

If you want it go and get it! The course can be awful at times and the work load is heavy but it’s most definitely worth it in the end!

The course is funded by the NHS, so you get a bursary, which reduces the old student loan!

JOBS@gairrhydd.COM

Ethical Entrepreneurs Two years ago a group of Cardiff students launched their own business to help bring clean water to Africa.

Jess Best finds out what it’s all about

Y

ou might have seen One Water for sale in the union, university cafeterias and watering holes of Cathays such as Kappucino’s for some time now.

Its distinctive blue label and ethical credentials as part of a project to bring clean water to the 1 billion people who go without it have made it a successful product with students.

But the reason this product has made it into Cardiff University at all is down to distribution company Two Distribute.

Set up two years ago by undergraduates from Cardiff’s business school who invested their precious cash to set up the scheme, Two Distribute is now the sole distributor of One Water for Cardiff University.

So how does it work? One Water is a global charity which works to install water pumps in African countries such as Swaziland, South Africa and Botswana.

People in Africa spend on average five hours a day walking to get water, but by raising money to put pumps in villages One Water are aiming to make this a thing of the past.

The £8000 Playpumps double up as roundabouts for children, and one turn of the roundabout pumps one litre of clean water from the ground for people to use.

People in Africa spend on average five hours a day walking to get water By reducing the time spent finding water, Playpumps can help increase the time children spend in education, and parents have more time and better resources to look after their crops and homes.

All in all, this gives them a better chance at life.

The original members of Two Distribute heard One Water founder

Duncan Goose give a speech about this humbling mission, and set up the company as a way to help. And develop their business skills in the process.

As a distribution company, Two Distribute deals with sales, marketing, logistics, accountancy and finance; all skills provided by business school students. With a team in place, they set about making One Water an important part of campus life.

In the two years since then they have gone from strength to strength, gaining volunteers and distribution contracts with Cardiff and Glamorgan University, as well as private businesses.

All the profits from Two D i s t r i b u t e ’s sales go to One Water, and so far the company has raised £6 500; two thirds of the way to being able to fund their first Playpump.

However, as the original members of Two Distribute found their graduation looming at the end of this year, they decided they needed people to carry on their hard work. And so Two Enterprise

was born.

Two Enterprise works in conjunction with Two Distribute to give their volunteers training to keep the company running successfully, providing training workshops to help develop all the skills you need when running a business like Two Distribute.

The advantages of doing something which will give you practical skills in the job market whilst doing something worthwhile were just part of the reason for Two Enterprise president Mark Brackley’s involvement with the project.

The second year business management student was attracted by the opportunities in the Two Enterprise and Two Distribute projects to do something new.

“I was getting so frustrated with my course, I just wanted to do something practical” he said “It’s great to work in a business in real time before even leaving uni. We’re actually out there, running it.”

His role as president next year will see him in charge of recruitment, training, running skills sessions and ensuring that communication is kept going throughout the team; all things which will give him plenty of experience when it comes to future roles after graduation.

Another part of this team is Garry Canningg, Marketing Manager for Two Distribute.

All the profits from Two Distribute’s sales go to One Water, and so far the company has raised £6 500 Also in his second year studying Business Management, Garry got involved after hearing about the project in a lecture shout out, and has enjoyed the learning curve involved in holding down a real position in a business.

“It can be difficult with uni commitments sometimes” he explained “and you definitely have to be passionate, but it can be really fulfilling to see it all work out “You gain all sorts of experience; presentation, communication, and people skills.

“You’re marketing for an actual company. And at the same time, you feel like you’re making a difference.

We want to keep building, with new people and new ideas.”

His marketing team recently organised One Water week in the Union, as well as a sponsored bungee jump.

The forty people jumping from a crane near Gabalfa have raised a running total of £700; Two Distribute’s biggest fundraising event to date.

Hoping to move on and ever upwards, the team are looking to expand to supply schools in the area, as well as putting pressure on the union to stock One Water as its only brand.

If you’re looking for something different and worthwhile to put on your CV, Two Distribute will be looking to recruit again next semester at the Societies Fair and throughout Fresher’s Week.

For any more information, visit their Facebook page www.facebook.com/ group.php?gid=2235000687 at or their website at www.twodistribute.co.uk

Graduate vacancies at ten year high Jess Best Jobs and Money Editor

A

n independent survey of the UK’s leading graduate employers has found that the increase in graduate vacancies for 2008 is the biggest in 10 years.

The Association of Graduate Recruiters Winter Review 2008 found the number of jobs available has increased for the fifth consecutive year in a row, this year by 16.4%.

Despite this, 67% of employers still believe that they will have problems filling the positions on offer.

The survey stated that this is down

The number of jobs available has increased for the fifth consecutive year in a row, this year by 16.4%.

to a combination of factors including increasingly selective graduates as well as employers’ claims that not enough graduates have the skills that they are looking for.

This has led almost a quarter of businesses to advertise their vacancies overseas.

Carl Gilleard, Chief Executive of the AGR said: “There is a strong message in these results for those seeking a graduate post in 2008 – don’t delay.

“Start applying for posts straight away and make sure that you prepare

your applications carefully to ensure you market yourself well.

“Despite the growth in vacancies, it is still a very competitive and demanding market out there.”

The survey also found that the number of graduates recruited from ethnic minorities had increased to 26.7% in 2007, up from 15.1% in 2006.

Cardiff University Careers Service is avialble for help and advice on any career issues you have. Visit http:// www.cf.ac.uk/carsv/.

Cleaner Ref: 075 A children’s nursery is looking for a hardworking and reliable cleaner to work from 6pm - 7pm Monday - Friday, with the possibility of extra hours. Your duties will be to ensure that all areas of the nursery are maintained to a high standard of cleanliness. £5.52 p/h Nursery Assistant Ref: 070 Private day care nursery for children aged 6 weeks - 5 years requires professional, patient and friendly staff who love working with children to assist in the nursery, encourage their learning, talk to parents and assist with feeds and changing. Driving licence an advantage, various shifts available. £5.52 p/h Helpline Advisor Ref: 067 National claims management company is looking for people with a superb standard of customer care and service to join its Cardiff team. You will be taking calls on behalf of various insurance companies from customers with a diverse range of claims, so you will need to be able to be calm and empathetic at all times. £11,700 pro rata Event Assistant Ref: 072 Friendly and outgoing people needed to help out with the organisation of a two day Electronics conference being held in Cardiff.

You will be registering delegates, setting up stands and acting as a general guide and must be organised, friendly and able to work well under your own initiative. £5.60 p/h

18 gairrhydd

MAI.12.2008

TAF-OD

TAF-OD@gairrhydd.COM

Ffafriaeth ar y Ffordd i’r Ffeinal?

Gwilym Dwyfor Golygydd Taf-od

M

ae diwrnod mawr yr Adar Gleision y prysur agosáu bellach. Bydd tîm pêl droed Caerdydd yn herio Portmouth yn Wembley ddydd Sadwrn wrth i wythnosau o aros ddod i ben i gefnogwyr y Prifddinaswyr. Does dim diwrnod yn mynd heibio heb i’r clwb fod yn y newyddion am rhyw reswm neu’i gilydd, a’r teimlad a geir wrth glywed bob stori yw bod Caerdydd wedi cael perffaith chwarae teg, a mwy efallai.

Dylwn nodi mai Caerdydd yw fy ail dîm, yn dilyn cochion Lerpwl felly mae’r hyn yr wyf am ei ddweud yn hollol ddi-duedd! Y stwr gyntaf a gafwyd oedd y cwestiwn mawr: a ddylai Caerdydd gael chwarae yn nghwpan UEFA y flwyddyn nesaf os ydynt yn ennill cwpan yr F. A. Wrth gwrs, yr ateb ym marn pob cefnogwr a minnau yn eu plith hwy oedd, ‘wel ydynt siwr iawn’.

Maent yn chwarae yn nghynghrair

Lloegr felly mae pob hawl ganddynt i gynrychioli’r wlad honno yn y gystadleuaeth Ewropeaidd.

Ond yna cododd y cwestiwn yngl^ y n â chwarae ein hanthem genedlaethol cyn derchrau’r gêm, ac unwaith eto roedd llawer yn gadarn o blaid, ac mae’n debyg y bydd hynny’n digwydd.

Ond os yw’r clwb am gael eu hystyried yn ran o F. A. Lloegr ar gyfer y cyfle o chwarae’n Ewrop nid oes rheswm dros chwarae anthem Cymru mewn gwirionedd.

Yna yn ddiweddar bu tro arall yn y gynffon. Dylai Darren Purse fod wedi ei wahardd rhag chwarae yn y ffeinal, wedi iddo dderbyn cerdyn coch yn dilyn tacl ar Andrew Cole ychydig wythnosau yn ôl. Disgrifwyd y dacl fel yr un waethaf y mae erioed wedi ei derbyn yn ei yrfa gan Cole sydd bellach yn 36 oed, a go brin y byddai cefnogwyr Caerdydd hyd yn oed yn gallu dadlau nad oedd hi’n dacl go fudur. Ond eto, mae Caerdydd wedi llwyddo i ddiddymu’r gwaharddiad trwy apelio yn erbyn y dyfarniad, nid trwy F. A. Lloegr ond trwy Gymde-

ithas Bêl Droed Cymru!

Teg dweud bod Caerdydd wedi cael ei ffordd ei hun yn ddigon aml dros yr wythnosau diwethaf felly, dim ond gobeithio y bydd hynny’n parhau ddydd Sadwrn!

Darren Purse: Dyn Lwcus iawn.

Munud i Feddwl ar Funud i Feddwl M. Ed Dwl Meddyliwr

W hir.

eithiau mae angen munud i feddwl, ond dro arall mae munud yn amser rhy

Mae angen munud i feddwl ar ‘Who Wants to be a Millionaire’ ond ddim ar yr ‘Weakest Link’. Mae angen munud i feddwl ar reolwr pêl droed wrth ddewis ei dîm ond ddim ar gôl-geidwad wrth arbed cic. Mae angen munud i feddwl wrth garu ond ddim wrth ddisgyn mewn cariad.

Priodasau pwy sy’n para hiraf?

Y rhai ddywedodd ‘ia iawn’ cyn i’w cymar orffen penlinio ta’r rheini a gymerodd funud i feddwl? Pwy sgin fwyaf o ffrindiau? Y rhai sy’n dweud eu barn yn ddi flewyn ar dafod neu’r rhai sy’n cymryd munud i feddwl?

Pwy sgin fwyaf o ffrindiau agos?

Peth rhyfedd yw meddwl, un o’r ychydig bethau mae pawb yn ei wneud, dyn ac anifail, trwy ei fywyd am wn i, ond eto, dyw ambell un ddim yn meddwl digon, llofruddiwyr, treiswyr, gwleidyddion hyd yn oed.

Ia... gwleidyddion... mae’r rheini’n cael eu talu i feddwl! Oni na chymerant

funud i wneud hynny weithiau.

‘Peth meddal ‘di meddwl’ medd rhai, ‘Ti’n gwbod be’ wnaeth meddwl’ medd un arall, ond i mi gael meddwl am un munud, mae’n rhaid i mi anghytuno. Rhaid meddwl cyn gwneud, wedi’r cwbl, dim ond munud gymerith hi! Mae meddwl ychydig bach fel ‘airbag’ felly. Meddal?

Ydi, ond pwysig hefyd, ac yn ein

‘Peth meddal ‘di meddwl’ medd rhai, ‘Ti’n gwbod be’ wnaeth meddwl’ medd un arall... hamddiffyn ni ac eraill rhag drwg.

Pe bai angen unrhyw dystiolaeth bellach dros ragoriaethau cymryd munud i feddwl dyna hi yn fan’na.

Byddai llenor dawnus wedi oedi a meddwl am well cymhariaeth nag ‘airbag’ ond dyna ni, meddwl am rywbeth arall yr o’n i mae’n debyg!

Mae ‘na funud wedi bod bellach siawns...

gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008 TELEVISION@gairrhydd.COM .

HOT

SATC = Cocktails at noon

!TELLY! No Fat Chicks

T

he Apprentice, where to begin?

The almost terrifying deluded individuals that make up the troupe of cretins competing for the job, Sir Alan’s sneered vulgarities seemingly only placed to worm out the squeemish and effete or the spookily omnipresent partnership of Sir Alan’s aides all make for unmissable viewing.

Everybody has their own personal favourite; be it the token bit of rough for the menopausal (Lee), effete public school nonce for people to laugh at (Nicholas), loveable public school nonce for the middle classes to get behind (Raef) or even blonde space cadet beamed down from the planet of high school art teachers (Lucinda). However, I’m sure that we can all agree that the one group of individuals that nobody has any time for is the duo of Helene and Claire.

Exactly the sort of women who would describe themselves as ‘bubbly’ or ‘brassy’ on an internet dating site. Clearly what they really mean is that they have the temperament of a bulldog licking piss off a nettle while paying their taxes and

finding a freshly lain turd in their sink.

Sir Alan, of course, spares little time in savaging each individual candidate for not speaking their mind, or speaking their mind, Too much, or for general fuck-

TELLY

NOT

Indiana Jones - yet another sequel!

We now come to the possible true stars of The Apprentice, Sir Alan’s aides Nick and Margaret. As the impeccable Charlie Brooker stated, they resemble a version of American Gothic that has mysteriously come to life, and spend their time haunting the hapless teams. Apparently built of sarcasm and sneering, this feisty twosome are ones to look out for!

Finally, the one to watch is actually on the companion show, The Apprentice: You’re Fired! Presented by the always lukewarm Adrian Chiles, a man so beige that even James Blunt found him dull, the show itself is a dissection of the previous episode’s fired candidate’s various flaws and misgivings. This is all well and good, especially when watching a particularly delusional candidate eat a huge slice of humble pie. The guests usually range from dull CEOs invited on to give the show an air of legitimacy, various low-level media whores desperate for any publicity available, to the sublime - Alvin Hall. Like a 21st Century Carlton Banks, Alvin Hall appears. He is my hero. I love him.

SOAPS

EXTRA TERRESTRIAL For anyone with access to more channels than the basic five which is pretty much everybody, you should really get involved with Trouble. I have happily whiled away many an hour watching mind numbing American sitcoms with the majority made in the decade that did sitcoms best, the 90s. With classics like Fresh Prince of Bel Air, Martin and In the House which stars none other than LL Cool J (You know he is cool cos it’s his name see) you need not reach for your remote control ever again. The beauty of the channel lies not only in its ability to act like a time capsule but the sheer scale of repeats which means you never have to worry about missing anything. It is almost guaranteed it

wittery. (Hello Nicholas!) However, due to the fact that Sir Alan is increasingly resembling a slowly balding muppet, the whole affair takes on a somewhat ridiculous slant.

19

will be on again by the end of the week.

The 90s shows are interspersed with more contemporary shows like The Hughleys, One on One, and Cuts. They all share the same comedic format and are pretty much interchangable so one need not pay too much attention. You also get serious ‘dramas’ like Veronica Mars and Kyle XY which can happily be ignored.

FUDGE TUNNEL

This week, I shall be doing the responsible (some would say lazy) thing and not divulging any soap secrets as we all have exams and what not and should not really be wasting so many hours on such baseless programming so instead I have decided to share with you the definition of exams: A test or an examination (or “exam”) is an assessment, often administered on paper or on the computer, intended to measure the test-taker’s or respondent’s (often a student) knowledge, skills, aptitudes, or classification in many other topics (e.g., beliefs). Tests are often used in education, professional certification, counselling, psychology (e.g., MMPI), the military, and many other fields. The measurement that is the

FILM

goal of testing is called a test score, and is “a summary of the evidence contained in an examinee’s responses to the items of a test that are related to the construct or constructs being measured.”[1] Test scores are interpreted with regards to a norm or criterion, or occasionally both. The norm may be established independently, or by statistical analysis of a large number of subjects.

Film is on hiatus this week so you naughty folk can get back to your learnings. To get you back in the mood here is a brief description of coursework: Coursework is carried out by students at university or middle / high school that contributes towards their overall grade, but which is assessed separately from their final exams. Coursework can, for example, take the form of experimental work, or may involve research in the sciences. It can comprise dissertations, book reports or essays submitted by arts subjects.

In universities, coursework is often one of many different modes of assessment. Students are required to produce coursework in order to broaden knowledge and enhance research skills, and to demonstrate that they can discuss, reason and construct practical outcomes from the theoretical knowledge learned during their course. Sometimes coursework is tackled by a group, so students may learn both how to work in groups and from each other. But in recent times, plagiarism and copying have been major issues to contend with.

I hope that’s inspired you lazy bums to get back to your desks and leave your televisions alone.

20 gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

TELLY

TELEVISION@gairrhydd.COM

MONDAY Out of the Blue BBC1 2.10pm

Ready Steady Cook Loose Women BBC2 4.30pm ITV1 9.00pm

BBC 1

BBC 2

ITV 1

12th May Day of Finnishness

Escape to Victory C4 12.10pm Channel 4

Neighbours five 1.45pm Five

6:00am Breakfast 9:15am Missing Live 10:00am Homes Under the Hammer 11:00am To Buy or Not to Buy 11:45am Cash in the Attic 12:15pm Bargain Hunt

6:00am CBeebies 7:00am CBBC 8:30am CBeebies 12:00pm The Daily Politics 12:30pm Working Lunch

6:00am GMTV Newshour 6:58am GMTV Today 9:25am The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:30am Dickinson’s Real Deal 11:30am 60 Minute Makeover 12:30pm Loose Women

6:10am Kids TV 6:45am Freshly Squeezed 7:15am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:10am Just Shoot Me 8:40am Frasier 9:10am Will and Grace 10:10am Friends 11:10am Mariah Carey 11:40am Duffy

6:00am Kids TV 9:00am The Wright Stuff 10:30am Trisha Goddard 11:30am Breaking into Tesco 12:30pm Five News 12:45pm Law and Order: Criminal Intent

1:00pm BBC News 1:30pm Wales Today; Weather 1:41pm Doctors 2:10pm Out of the Blue 2:35pm Real Rescues 3:05pm CBBC

1:00pm Science Clips Investigates 1:10pm Science Clips Investigates 1:20pm Primary Geography 1:30pm Animal Park 2:30pm Murder, She Wrote 3:15pm Through the Keyhole 3:45pm Flog It!

1:30pm ITV Lunchtime News and Weather 2:00pm Agatha Christie’s Poirot 3:00pm Midsomer Murders

12:10pm Escape to Victory 2:20pm A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 3:25pm Countdown 4:15pm Deal or No Deal

1:45pm Neighbours 2:15pm The Hallelujah Trail

5:15pm The Weakest Link

4:30pm Ready Steady Cook 5:15pm Escape to the Country

5:00pm Goldenballs

5:00pm The Paul O’Grady Show

5:00pm Five News 5:30pm Neighbours

6:00pm BBC News 6:30pm Wales Today; Weather 7:00pm The One Show 7:30pm Watchdog 7:57pm BBC News and Regional News 8:00pm EastEnders 8:30pm Panorama 9:00pm Waking the Dead

6:00pm Eggheads 6:30pm Great British Menu 8:00pm The Truth about Property

6:00pm Wales Tonight 6:15pm ITV Evening News and Weather 6:30pm You’ve Been Framed!

7:00pm Emmerdale 7:30pm Coronation Street 8:00pm Wales This Week 8:30pm Coronation Street 9:00pm Flood

6:00pm The Simpsons 6:30pm Hollyoaks 7:00pm Channel 4 News 7:25pm 3 Minute Wonder 7:30pm A Time Team Special: Britain’s Drowned World

6:00pm Airplane II: The Sequel 7:30pm How Do They Do It? 8:00pm The Gadget Show

9:00pm Grand Designs Live

9:00pm Paul Merton in China

10:00pm BBC News 10:25pm Wales Today; Weather 10:35pm Belonging

10:00pm Have I Got News for You 10:30pm Newsnight

10:00pm Hostage

10:00pm Dom Joly’s Complainers

11:05pm Meet the Immigrants 11:35pm Inside Sport 12:15am Iron Eagle 2:05am Weatherview 2:10am Sign Zone:Panorama 2:40am Sign Zone:Across The Andes: Beyond Boundaries

11:20pm Parallel Worlds: A User’s Guide 12:20am Joins BBC News 4:00am Marsalis on Music 4:55am Marsalis on Music

12:55am Who Dares Wins 3:00am The Diets That Time Forgot 4:00am Sarah Moves On 5:30am Sarah and the Whammi 5:45am Sarah and the Whammi

11:05pm Dangerous Minds 12:55am NASCAR: The Sprint Cup 1:50am USPGA Golf 2:40am NHL Ice Hockey 5:10am House Doctor 5:35am Neighbours

9:00pm Teen Mum High

11:00pm Late News and Weather 11:15pm The Adventures of Pluto Nash 12:30am UEFA Champions League Weekly 1:00am End of Cheap Food: Tonight 1:30am Never to be Forgotten 1:55am Loose Women

PICK OF THE DAY Ready Steady Cook, BBC2, 4.30pm This week, I thought, instead of the usual drivel that resides in the TV teams’ noggins, I would give you less than likeable TV readers a lesson in crime history. I happened upon Jeffery Dahmer in my day to day wandering through the world of learning and I found him a thoroughly fascinating character. I am obviously not condoning murdering and all that but this here fella developed it into a fine art. He was an American serial killer who murdered 17 men and boys betweeen 1978 and 1991, what makes him different from all the other murderers was that he was well gruesome. He was into rape, necrophilia and cannibalism... that’s right cannibalism. No worries though he is dead. He was beaten to death by another inmate with a bar from a weight machine whilst tidying the prison gym. Thank you Wikipedia.

gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

TELLY

TELEVISION@gairrhydd.COM

TUESDAY The Weakest Link BBC1 5.15pm

Abortion: The Choice BBC2 9.00pm

BBC 1

BBC 2

Fire! Fire!

ITV1 11.05pm ITV

21

13th May Alison Goldfrapp’s Birthday

The World’s Tallest Jaguar Adventure Woman and Me with Nigel Marven C4 10.00pm five 7.30pm Channel 4

Five

6:00am Breakfast 9:15am Missing Live 10:00am Homes Under the Hammer 11:00am To Buy or Not to Buy 11:45am Cash in the Attic 12:15pm Bargain Hunt

6:00am CBeebies 7:00am CBBC 8:30am CBeebies 10:30am Let’s Write Poetry 10:50am Primary History 11:10am Timewatch 12:00pm The Daily Politics 12:30pm Working Lunch

6:00am GMTV Newshour 6:58am GMTV Today 8:35am LK Today 9:25am The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:30am This Morning 11:10am ITV News 11:15am ITV Wales News and Weather 11:20am This Morning 12:30pm Loose Women

6:00am Kids TV 7:00am Freshly Squeezed 7:30am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:00am Just Shoot Me 8:25am Frasier 9:00am Will and Grace 9:30am Teen Tycoons 10:00am Teen Tycoons 10:30am Pioneer House 11:25am KNTV - Philosophy

6:00am Kids TV 9:00am The Wright Stuff 10:30am Trisha Goddard 11:30am Put Your Money Where Your House Is 12:00pm House Doctor 12:30pm Five News 12:45pm Law and Order: Criminal Intent

1:00pm BBC News 1:30pm Wales Today; Weather 1:40pm Doctors 2:10pm Out of the Blue 2:35pm Real Rescues 3:05pm CBBC5:00pm Newsround

1:00pm The Maths Channel - Year 3 1:10pm Primary Geography 1:30pm Through the Keyhole 2:00pm am.pm 3:00pm Murder, She Wrote 3:45pm Flog It! 4:30pm Ready Steady Cook

1:30pm ITV Lunchtime News and Weather 2:00pm 60 Minute Makeover 3:00pm Dickinson’s Real Deal 4:00pm Agatha Christie’s Poirot

12:00pm News at Noon 12:30pm Burgh Island: Checking into History 12:50pm The Last Command 2:55pm A Place in the Sun 3:25pm Countdown 4:15pm Deal or No Deal

1:45pm Neighbours 2:15pm Home and Away 2:50pm Animal Rescue Squad 3:05pm The Family Recipe 3:15pm Tornado!

5:15pm The Weakest Link

5:15pm Escape to the Country

5:00pm Goldenballs

5:00pm The Paul O’Grady Show

5:00pm Five News with Natasha Kaplinsky 5:30pm Neighbours

6:00pm BBC News 6:30pm Wales Today; Weather 7:00pm The One Show 7:30pm EastEnders 7:57pm BBC News and Regional News 8:00pm Holby City

6:00pm Eggheads 6:30pm Great British Menu 7:00pm Welsh Map Mystery 7:30pm Rick Stein’s French Odyssey 8:00pm The Truth about Property

6:00pm Wales Tonight 6:30pm ITV Evening News and Weather 7:00pm Emmerdale: Denial 8:00pm Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?

6:00pm The Simpsons 6:30pm Hollyoaks 7:00pm Channel 4 News 7:55pm 3 Minute Wonder: From This Day Forward 8:00pm How to Look Good Naked

9:00pm Waking the Dead

9:00pm Abortion: The Choice

9:00pm The Duke: A Portrait of Prince Philip

9:00pm Gordon Ramsay’s F Word

6:00pm Home and Away 6:30pm Monkey Life 7:00pm Five News with Natasha Kaplinsky 7:30pm Jaguar Adventure with Nigel Marven 8:00pm The Yorkshire Ripper - Mind of a Killer: Revealed 9:00pm CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

10:00pm BBC News 10:25pm Wales Today; Weather 10:33pm BBC Weather 10:35pm Week In, Week Out

10:00pm Later Live... with Jools Holland 10:30pm Newsnight

10:00pm News at Ten and Weather 10:35pm Benidorm

10:00pm The World’s Tallest Woman and Me

10:00pm CSI: Miami

11:05pm Madonna R1 Big Weekend 11:45pm Phenomenon 1:45am Weatherview 1:50am Sign Zone:Child of Our Time 2:50am Sign Zone:Estate We’re In 3:35am Sign Zone:Ben Fogle’s Extreme Dreams

11:20pm Mad Men 12:10am Joins BBC News 4:00am Marsalis on Music 4:55am Cool Keys

11:05pm Fire! Fire!

11:35pm Dexter 12:35am Nightwatch with Steve Scott: Emergency 2:20am Loose Women 3:10am The Jeremy Kyle Show 4:05am ITV Nightscreen

11:05pm 4 Music:Coldplay: Video Exclusive 11:10pm Sex and the City: World Premiere Special 11:40pm Dirty Sexy Money 12:40am PartyPoker.com Premier League Poker

11:00pm Law and Order: Criminal Intent 12:00am The FBI Files 1:00am Football Italiano 1:25am NBA Basketball 4:20am French Football 5:10am House Doctor

PICK OF THE DAY Teen Tycoons, CH4, 10.00am No one needs this, like not in the slightest. The Channel Four bosses have got things absolutely wrong here in thinking that any sort of audience fancies seeing a bunch of snot-nosed kids who have managed to catch a lucky break rolling around in their most likely ill gained monies. The rest of us ‘normal’ folk have to stick to the daily grind of going to uni, getting unfortunate jobs, getting fired from said jobs for setting fire to some filing which to be fair no one really needed anyway, getting another unfortunate job but sticking with it, only ever earning enough to keep one’s head above water until we die a boring death in our sleep with no one to find our decaying bodies but our pet rock Larry. This may all seem pretty miserable but these are the facts of life although I forgot to add that some lucky few will get PHDs in sexiness and avoid this, those people being me and a fellow known as Dickbeard.

22 gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

TELLY

WEDNESDAY Out of the Blue BBC1 2.10pm

BBC 1

Virgin Memories BBC2 11.20pm

When Cardiff Won The Cup ITV1 11.10pm

BBC 2

ITV 1

TELEVISION@gairrhydd.COM

14th May Cate Blanchett’s Birthday

Half Ton Dad C4 9.00pm

Channel 4

The Girl in the Box five 10.00pm

Five

6:00am Breakfast 9:15am Missing Live 10:00am Homes Under the Hammer 11:00am To Buy or Not to Buy 11:45am Cash in the Attic 12:15pm Bargain Hunt

6:00am CBeebies 10:30am A Picture of Britain 11:30am am.pm

6:00am GMTV Newshour 6:58am GMTV Today 8:35am LK Today 9:25am The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:30am This Morning 11:10am ITV News 11:15am ITV Wales News and Weather 11:20am This Morning 12:30pm Loose Women

6:00am Kids TV 7:00am Freshly Squeezed 7:30am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:00am Just Shoot Me 8:30am Frasier 9:00am Will and Grace 9:30am Teen Tycoons 10:00am Teen Tycoons 10:30am Pioneer House 11:25am KNTV - Philosophy

6:00am Kids TV 9:00am The Wright Stuff 10:30am Trisha Goddard 11:30am Put Your Money Where Your House Is

1:00pm BBC News 1:30pm Wales Today; Weather 1:40pm Doctors 2:10pm Out of the Blue 2:35pm Real Rescues 3:05pm CBBC

1:00pm See Hear 1:30pm Working Lunch 2:00pm Animal Park 2:30pm Murder, She Wrote 3:15pm Through the Keyhole 3:45pm Flog It! 4:30pm Ready Steady Cook

1:30pm ITV Lunchtime News and Weather 2:00pm 60 Minute Makeover 3:00pm Dickinson’s Real Deal 4:00pm Agatha Christie’s Poirot

12:00pm News at Noon 12:30pm A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 1:30pm Channel 4 Racing 3:25pm Countdown 4:15pm Deal or No Deal

12:00pm House Doctor 12:30pm Five News 12:45pm Law and Order: Criminal Intent 1:45pm Neighbours 2:15pm Home and Away 2:50pm Animal Rescue Squad

5:15pm The Weakest Link

5:15pm Escape to the Country

5:00pm Goldenballs

5:00pm The Paul O’Grady Show

6:00pm BBC News 6:30pm Wales Today; Weather 7:00pm The One Show 7:30pm X-Ray 8:00pm Child of Our Time

6:00pm Eggheads 6:30pm Great British Menu 7:00pm Mountain 8:00pm Superfish 8:50pm Strictly Black Grouse

6:00pm Wales Tonight 6:30pm ITV Evening News and Weather 7:00pm Coronation Street 7:30pm UEFA Cup Final: Rangers v Zenit St Petersburg

6:00pm The Simpsons 6:30pm Hollyoaks 7:00pm Channel 4 News 7:55pm 3 Minute Wonder: From This Day Forward 8:00pm Property Ladder

9:00pm The Apprentice

9:00pm Dan Cruickshank’s Adventures in Architecture

3:05pm The Family Recipe 3:15pm Spring Thaw 5:00pm Five News with Natasha Kaplinsky 5:30pm Neighbours 6:00pm Home and Away 6:30pm Monkey Life 7:00pm Five News with Natasha Kaplinsky 7:30pm It Pays to Watch 8:00pm Megastructures 9:00pm Amityville Horror: The True Story

10:00pm BBC News 10:25pm Wales Today; Weather 10:33pm BBC Weather 10:35pm The National Lottery Draws

10:00pm The Apprentice: You’re Fired 10:30pm Newsnight

10:00pm News at Ten and Weather 10:35pm Dexter 10:40pm Welsh In The West End

10:00pm Desperate Housewives

10:00pm The Girl in the Box

10:40pm Comedy Sketchbook 11:30pm Bounce 1:10am Weatherview 1:15am Sign Zone:Seaside Rescue 1:45am Sign Zone:Meet the Immigrants 2:15am Sign Zone:An Island Parish

11:20pm Virgin Memories 12:20am Joins BBC News 4:00am Mad about Music 5:00am Mad about Music

11:10pm When Cardiff Won The Cup 11:40pm Never To Be Forgotten 12:15am Motorsport UK 12:45am Nightwatch with Steve Scott: Mystery 1:35am Loose Women 2:25am The Jeremy Kyle Show

11:05pm Michael Jackson: What Really Happened 12:05am 4 Music:What About Me? 12:40am 4 Music:The Nokia Green Room 1:10am 4 Music:4Play: The Futureheads

11:05pm Outlaw Bikers 12:05am PartyPoker.com European Open IV 1:35am Major League Baseball 4:20am Supercross World Championship 5:10am House Doctor

9:00pm Half Ton Dad

PICK OF THE DAY Michael Jackson: What Really Happened, Ch4, 11.05pm A child progidy as soon as he could utter his first word, Michael Jackson had the world at his feet from the word ‘go.’ With awards, sell-out tours and worldwide hits galore, Jackson went down in history as one of the world’s most successful stars of the eighties and nineties. However, a current look at the superstar portrays a very different picture.... Now with courtcases left, right and centre, enough facial reworking to fund global debts and the downfall of his Californian ranch/funfair, Neverland, the situation couldn’t be more different. So what went wrong for the one-time idolised songster? Well, a lot, if I must answer the question myself. But for now I am going to sit back and watch this interpretation of what exactly happened to Wacko Jacko. He’s had a fair bit of media coverage during his lifetime, but with the Martin Bashir interview aside, this programme tops the lot!

gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

TELLY

TELEVISION@gairrhydd.COM

THURSDAY Bargain Hunt BBC1 12.15pm

Women in Black BBC2 11.20pm

BBC 1

BBC 2

The Classsical Brit Awards 2008 ITV1 12.05am ITV 1

23

15th May Conscientious Objectors’ Day

Peep Show C4 11.30pm

Channel 4

I Own Britain’s Best Home 2008 five 8.00pm Five

6:00am Breakfast 9:15am Missing Live 10:00am Homes Under the Hammer 11:00am To Buy or Not to Buy 11:45am Cash in the Attic 12:15pm Bargain Hunt

6:00am CBeebies 12:00pm The Daily Politics 12:30pm Working Lunch

6:00am GMTV Newshour 6:58am GMTV Today 8:35am LK Today 9:25am The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:30am This Morning 11:10am ITV News 11:15am ITV Wales News and Weather 11:20am This Morning 12:30pm Loose Women

6:00am Kids TV 7:00am Freshly Squeezed 7:30am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:00am Just Shoot Me 8:30am Frasier 9:00am Will and Grace 9:30am Teen Tycoons 10:00am Teen Tycoons 10:30am Pioneer House 11:25am KNTV - Philosophy

6:00am Kids TV 9:00am The Wright Stuff 10:30am Trisha Goddard 11:30am Put Your Money Where Your House Is 12:00pm House Doctor 12:30pm Five News 12:45pm Law and Order: Criminal Intent

1:00pm BBC News 1:30pm Wales Today; Weather 1:40pm Doctors 2:10pm Out of the Blue 2:35pm Real Rescues 3:05pm CBBC

1:00pm Open Gardens 1:30pm Animal Park 2:30pm Murder, She Wrote 3:15pm Through the Keyhole 3:45pm Flog It! 4:30pm Ready Steady Cook

1:30pm ITV Lunchtime News and Weather 2:00pm 60 Minute Makeover 3:00pm Dickinson’s Real Deal 4:00pm Agatha Christie’s Poirot

12:00pm News at Noon 12:30pm A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 1:30pm Channel 4 Racing 3:25pm Countdown 4:15pm Deal or No Deal

1:45pm Neighbours 2:15pm Home and Away 2:50pm Animal Rescue Squad 3:05pm Five News Update 3:10pm Shadow of a Doubt

5:15pm The Weakest Link

5:15pm Escape to the Country

5:00pm Goldenballs

5:00pm The Paul O’Grady Show

5:00pm Five News with Natasha Kaplinsky 5:30pm Neighbours

6:00pm BBC News 6:30pm Wales Today; Weather 7:00pm The One Show 7:30pm EastEnders 7:57pm BBC News and Regional News 8:00pm Holby Blue

6:00pm Eggheads 6:30pm Great British Menu 7:00pm Jonathan Meades: Magnetic North 7:30pm Big Country 8:00pm Living the Dream Revisited

6:00pm Wales Tonight 6:30pm ITV Evening News and Weather 7:00pm Emmerdale 8:00pm The Bill: Frontline: Endgame

6:00pm The Simpsons 6:30pm Hollyoaks 7:00pm Channel 4 News 7:55pm 3 Minute Wonder: From This Day Forward 8:00pm Come Dine with Me

9:00pm The Invisibles

9:00pm Heroes 9:45pm Heroes Unmasked

9:00pm Midnight Man

9:00pm The Artful Codgers

6:00pm Home and Away 6:30pm Monkey Life 7:00pm Five News with Natasha Kaplinsky 7:15pm Cricket on five 8:00pm I Own Britain’s Best Home 2008: The Final 9:00pm House

10:00pm BBC News 10:25pm Wales Today; Weather 10:33pm BBC Weather 10:35pm Dragon’s Eye

10:00pm The Graham Norton Show 10:30pm Newsnight

10:00pm News at Ten and Weather 10:35pm A Very Exotic Vet

10:00pm My Name Is Earl 10:30pm Big Bang Theory

10:00pm Grey’s Anatomy

11:05pm Question Time 12:05am This Week 12:50am Holiday Weather 12:55am Sign Zone:Johnny’s New Kingdom 1:25am Sign Zone:Bill Oddie’s Wild Side

11:20pm Women in Black 11:50pm Malcolm in the Middle 12:15am Malcolm in the Middle 12:35am Joins BBC News 4:00am Mad about Music 5:00am Mad about Music

11:05pm Sharp End 11:35pm Unsigned 12:05am The Classical Brit Awards 2008 1:05am Amy Winehouse: Vodafone Summer Series 1:35am Never To Be Forgotten

11:00pm Derren Brown: Trick or Treat 11:30pm Peep Show 12:05am 4 Music:The Shockwaves Album Chart Show: Pigeon Detectives Special 12:35am 4 Music:Five O’Clock Heroes featuring Agyness Deyn

11:00pm Hidden Lives: Sweaty Betty 12:00am Quiz Call 4:00am Major League Soccer 4:20am Dutch Football 5:10am House Doctor 5:35am Neighbours

PICK OF THE DAY Hidden Lives: Sweaty Betty, five, 11.00pm No, nothing to do with America Ferrera from ‘Ugly Betty’; the picture was just appropriate! Now, we are all familiar with the saying, ‘Men Sweat, Women Glow’, but this programme completely disproves the theory, showing that females not only sweat but they rival Niagra Falls as a rather damp tourist attraction! Yet before you go searching out your tar and brush, I must stress that this only applies to a minority of the female populace... a minority who suffer from the condition associated with such excessive perspiration, Hyperhidrosis. In this episode of the Channel 5 series ‘Hidden Lives’, we take a look at the sufferers and how it affects their everyday lives. Yeah it’s funny at first (and I don’t deny myself a chuckle from time to time), but as the show goes on the serious and sensitive nature of being a Sweaty Betty becomes apparent... bless their sweaty little cotton socks!

24 gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

TELLY

TELEVISION@gairrhydd.COM

FRIDAY Timecop BBC1 11.40pm

Tales from Europe BBC2 11.15am

BBC 1

16th May Middlesex Day

Holidays Uncovered ITV1 8.00pm

BBC 2

Space Travel according to John C4 7.55pm

Shark five 10.00pm

ITV 1

Channel 4

Five

6:10am Kids TV 7:00am Freshly Squeezed 7:30am Everybody Loves Raymond 8:00am Just Shoot Me 8:30am Frasier 9:00am Will and Grace 9:30am Pioneer House 11:25am KNTV - Philosophy 12:00pm News at Noon 12:30pm A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 1:30pm Channel 4 Racing 3:25pm Countdown 4:15pm Deal or No Deal

6:00am Kids TV 9:00am The Wright Stuff 10:30am Trisha Goddard 11:30am Put Your Money Where Your House Is 12:00pm House Doctor 12:30pm Five News 12:45pm Law and Order: Criminal Intent

6:00am Breakfast 9:15am Missing Live 10:00am Homes Under the Hammer 11:00am To Buy or Not to Buy 11:45am Cash in the Attic 12:15pm Bargain Hunt 1:00pm BBC News 1:30pm Wales Today; Weather 1:40pm Doctors 2:10pm Out of the Blue 2:35pm Real Rescues 3:05pm CBBC

6:00am CBeebies 7:00am CBBC 8:30am CBeebies 10:45am The Way Things Work 11:00am The Way Things Work 11:15am Tales from Europe 11:30am Watch 11:45am Something Special 12:00pm The Daily Politics 12:30pm Working Lunch

6:00am GMTV Newshour 6:58am GMTV Today 8:35am Entertainment Today 9:25am The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:30am This Morning 11:10am ITV News 11:15am ITV Wales News and Weather 11:20am This Morning 12:30pm Loose Women

1:30pm Animal Park 2:30pm Murder, She Wrote 3:15pm Through the Keyhole 3:45pm Flog It! 4:30pm Ready Steady Cook

1:30pm ITV Lunchtime News and Weather 2:00pm 60 Minute Makeover 3:00pm Dickinson’s Real Deal 4:00pm Agatha Christie’s Poirot

5:15pm The Weakest Link

5:15pm Escape to the Country

5:00pm Goldenballs

5:00pm The Paul O’Grady Show

5:00pm Five News 5:30pm Neighbours

6:00pm BBC News 6:30pm Wales Today: FA Cup Special 7:30pm The One Show 8:00pm EastEnders 8:30pm A Question of Sport: FA Cup Final Special

6:00pm Eggheads 6:30pm Great British Menu 7:00pm Wildlife on Two 7:30pm The Trees That Made Britain 8:00pm Gardeners’ World

6:00pm Wales Tonight 6:30pm ITV Evening News and Weather 7:00pm Emmerdale 7:30pm Coronation Street 8:00pm Holidays Uncovered: Tonight 8:30pm Coronation Street

6:00pm The Simpsons 6:30pm Hollyoaks 7:00pm Channel 4 News 7:55pm 3 Minute Wonder: Space Travel According to John 8:00pm Deadliest Catch

6:00pm Home and Away 6:30pm Monkey Life 7:00pm Five News 7:15pm Cricket on five 8:00pm Police Interceptors

9:00pm Have I Got News for You 9:30pm My Family 10:00pm BBC News 10:25pm Wales Today; Weather 10:33pm BBC Weather 10:35pm Friday Night with Jonathan Ross

9:00pm Across The Andes: Beyond Boundaries 10:00pm QI 10:30pm Newsnight

9:00pm Benidorm

9:00pm Dirty Sexy Money

9:00pm NCIS

9:30pm An Audience Without... Jeremy Beadle 10:30pm Teenage Kicks

10:00pm Derren Brown: Trick or Treat 10:30pm Peep Show

10:00pm Shark

11:35pm National Lottery EuroMillions Draw 11:40pm Timecop 1:15am Weatherview 1:20am Sign Zone: Dan Cruickshank’s Adventures in Architecture 2:20am Sign Zone: Estate We’re In 3:05am Sign Zone: Animal 24:7

11:00pm Newsnight Review 11:35pm Later...with Jools Holland 12:35am Day of the Dead 2:10am Star Trek: The Next Generation 2:55am Star Trek: The Next Generation 3:40am Malcolm in the Middle 4:05am Malcolm in the Middle

11:00pm The Late News and Weather 11:45pm Raines 12:30am Nightwatch with Steve Scott: Crime 1:25am Pavilion of Women 3:20am ITV Nightscreen 5:30am ITV Early Morning News

11:05pm Gordon Ramsay’s F Word 12:10am Big Bang Theory 12:40am 4 Music: The Colour Rooms in Association with Bravia by Sony 1:25am 4 Music:: JD Set Presents The Futureheads 1:40am 4 Music: Ibiza Rocks with Sony Ericsson

11:00pm Law and Order: Special Victims Unit 12:00am Quiz Call 4:45am Out of Practice 5:10am House Doctor 5:35am Neighbours

PICK OF THE DAY An Audience Without...Jeremy Beadle, ITV1, 9.30pm This is surely in poor taste, he has been dead for a couple of months and already a major television company is already trying to capitalise on it! I mean, it’s alright when TV uses him for japery as we are young, irresponsible and foolish, in other words freaking cool. I have no idea what the concept behind this heinous show is but I am almost certain it’ll be an audience of under fifteens forced to watch archived footage of all Beadle based programming in the hope they will be so overwhelmed with grief at the loss of such a great character that they use their nubile minds to develop a machine to bring the dead back to life. This doesn’t seem to so bad actually as there is quite a high chance that I could swoop in, make off with the machine and revive the dead sitcom and my all time favourite show, Sister, Sister!

1:45pm Neighbours 2:15pm Home and Away 2:50pm Animal Rescue Squad 3:05pm The Family Recipe 3:15pm LA Law: Return to Justice

gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

TELLY

TELEVISION@gairrhydd.COM

SATURDAY The Kids are Alright BBC1 6.05pm

The Hitch-Hiker BBC2 3.25am

BBC 1 6:00am Breakfast 10:00am Saturday Kitchen 11:30am Great British Menu 12:00pm BBC News 12:10pm Match of the Day Live: FA Cup Final

BBC 2

2 Fast 2 Furious ITV1 12.10am

ITV 1

17th May Enya’s Birthday

Come Dine With Me Grumpy Old Men C4 5.35pm five 5.20 pm

Channel 4

Five

6:10am KIds TV 7:00am Goalissimo!

8:00am The Morning Line 8:50am T4: Friends 9:25am T4: The Nokia Green Room 10:25am T4: Shipwrecked 2008: Battle of the Islands 11:30am T4: Shipwrecked 2008: The Third Island 12:00pm T4: Friends 12:30pm T4: Shipwrecked 2008: The Hutcam Diaries 1:00pm T4: Pussycat Dolls Present: Girlicious 2:00pm Channel 4 Racing 4:15pm Deal or No Deal

6:00am Sunrise 7:00am Kids TV 10:00am Football Italiano Highlights 10:30am Extraordinary Animals 11:00am Rough Guide to Eco Escapes 11:10am Neighbours

5:00pm ITV Wales News and Weather 5:15pm ITV News and Weather 5:30pm You’ve Been Framed!

5:00pm Jamie at Home 5:35pm Come Dine with Me

5:20pm Grumpy Old Men 7:00pm Five News and Sport 7:15pm Cricket on five 8:00pm NCIS

6:00am CBeebies 7:00am CBBC 12:45pm Class of 2008

6:00am CITV 10:30am Planet’s Funniest Animals 10:45am The Pride and the Passion

1:15pm Sound 2:00pm The Surgery 2:20pm Revealed 2:35pm The Importance of Being Earnest 4:10pm Monk 4:50pm The Man from Laramie

1:10pm ITV News and Weather 1:15pm ITV Wales News and Weather 1:20pm Gentlemen Prefer Blondes 3:00pm Agatha Christie’s Poirot

5:45pm BBC News 5:55pm Wales Today; Weather

6:05pm The Kids Are All Right 6:45pm Doctor Who 7:30pm I’d Do Anything 8:30pm The National Lottery: 1 vs 100

6:30pm Dad’s Army 7:00pm Wild China 8:00pm Andrew Marr’s History of Modern Britain

6:00pm Britain Does the Funniest Things 7:00pm All Star Mr and Mrs 8:00pm Britain’s Got Talent

6:35pm Channel 4 News 7:00pm Grand Designs Abroad 8:00pm ER

9:20pm Casualty

9:00pm Have I Got a Bit More News for You 9:40pm Comedy Map of Britain 10:40pm The Apprentice

9:00pm Pushing Daisies

9:00pm GI Jane

11:40pm The Apprentice: You’re Fired 12:15am Bandolero!

1:55am Mad Men 2:45am Monk 3:25am The Hitch-Hiker

11:00pm ITV News and Weather 11:15pm 2 Fast 2 Furious 12:15am Nightwatch with Steve Scott: Crime 1:10am Nightwatch - Emergency 1:58am ITV News Headlines 2:00am Kiss Tomorrow Goodbye 2:30am ITV Nightscreen

10:10pm Love Soup 10:40pm BBC News

11:00pm Match of the Day: FA Cup Final Highlights 12:05am The Guilty 1:50am Friday Night with Jonathan Ross 2:50am Weatherview 2:55am Joins BBC News

25

10:00pm 2 Fast 2 Furious

PICK OF THE DAY Gentlemen Prefer Blondes, ITV1, 1:20pm I feel its time you young student folk get back to basics when it comes to film watching, none of this Ironman and CGI nonsense. This classic 1953 film starring Jane Russell and Marilyn Monroe is darn amazing. It’s funny and comes with some super show tunes, like High School Musical but its the 50s and there is a lot less sexual tension. If that isn’t enough, it’s the movie where Monroe gives that much copied performance of Diamonds are a girls best friend. Here are some facts about Marilyn Monroe that you can impress one’s housemates with and anyone else who comes your way: Marilyn Monroe’s real name was Norma Jean Baker and she was first married at the age of 16 to a James Dougherty.

1:20pm Absence of Malice 3:30pm Seems like Old Times

9:00pm NCIS 10:00pm CSI: NY

11:20pm Commando 12:55am 4 Music: Ibiza Rocks with Sony Ericsson 1:35am 4 Music: Ibiza Rocks with Sony Ericsson 2:05am BASEketball 3:50am Grudge Match 4:30am St Elsewhere

11:00pm Law and Order 12:00am True CSI 1:00am Quiz Call 4:45am Out of Practice 5:10am Wildlife SOS 5:35am Wildlife SOS

26 gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

TELLY

TELEVISION@gairrhydd.COM

SUNDAY My Family BBC1 7:00pm

Wild China BBC2 8.00pm

BBC 1

Down To Earth ITV1 5.45pm

18th May International Museum Day

Candy C4 11.35pm

Daddy Day Care five 11.25pm

BBC 2

ITV 1

Channel 4

6:00am Breakfast 9:00am The Andrew Marr Show 10:00am Sunday Life 11:00am Countryfile 12:00pm The Politics Show

6:00am CBeebies 10:00am Something for the Weekend 11:30am Animal Park

6:00am The Sunday Programme 7:25am CITV 10:45am Coronation Street Omnibus

6:10am The Hoobs 6:35am Trans World Sport 7:30am Bennetts British Superbike Championship 8:30am The Shooting Party 8:55am T4:Shipwrecked 2008: The Hutcam Diaries 9:30am T4:Hollyoaks Omnibus

6:00am Kids TV 11:00am How Do They Do It? 11:30am The News Boys

1:00pm 102 Dalmatians 2:35pm EastEnders 4:35pm Lifeline 4:45pm Points of View

12:30pm Moto GP: Le Mans 2:30pm Boxing: ABA Finals 4:00pm Athletics: Great Manchester Run

1:00pm ITV News and Weather 1:03pm ITV Weather 1:05pm ITV Wales News and Weather 1:10pm The Crocodile Hunter Diaries 2:10pm Britain’s Got Talent 3:10pm Apollo 13

11:55am T4: Shipwrecked 2008: Battle of the Islands 1:05pm T4: Shipwrecked 2008: The Third Island 1:45pm T4: The Nokia Green Room 2:15pm T4: Friends 2:45pm T4: Smallville: Superman the Early Years 3:45pm T4: The Simpsons

1:45pm Football Italiano 4:10pm Jaguar Adventure with Nigel Marven

5:00pm Songs of Praise 5:35pm Chelsea Flower Show

5:30pm Premiership Rugby Highlights

5:45pm Down To Earth

5:10pm Daddy Day Care

6:05pm BBC News 6:25pm Wales Today; Weather 6:30pm Seaside Rescue 7:00pm My Family 7:30pm I’d Do Anything Results 8:00pm Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade

6:30pm Bill Oddie Goes Wild 7:10pm Meerkat Manor 7:35pm Meerkat Manor 8:00pm Wild China

6:15pm ITV Wales News and Weather 6:30pm ITV News and Weather 6:43pm ITV Weather 6:45pm Beat the Star 8:00pm Heartbeat

4:15pm T4: The Simpsons 4:45pm Time Team 5:40pm Scrapheap Challenge 6:45pm Channel 4 News 7:00pm Bremner, Bird and Fortune 8:00pm Bear Grylls: Born Survivor

9:00pm Coast

9:00pm Ultimate Force

9:00pm Brokeback Mountain

9:00pm The Patriot

10:00pm BBC News 10:20pm Cardiff’s FA Cup

10:00pm Russia: A Journey with Jonathan Dimbleby

10:30pm ITV News and Weather 10:42pm ITV Weather 10:43pm Regional Weather

11:00pm Six Days, Seven Nights 12:35am Weatherview 12:40am Sign Zone: Watchdog 1:10am Sign Zone: Ben Fogle’s Extreme Dreams 1:40am Sign Zone: Holby City 2:40am Digital Stories

11:00pm The Graham Norton Show 11:45pm Heroes

10:45pm Gore Vidal: The South Bank Show 11:45pm Hitler in Colour

PICK OF THE DAY Brokeback Mountain, Ch4, 9.00pm Ahh the lovely Heath Ledger, God rest his soul. This is probably the film that marked Heath’s career; turning him from just a recognised, swoon-worthy face in Hollywood, to an overnight megastar! Without a doubt, this film gave Ledger the platform he needed to showcase his acting prowess, in turn leading to his most recent (and last) casting as the Joker in the up and coming Batman film. This is also the set where he met his ex-wife and mother to his daughter, Matilda - Michelle Williams plays Ledger’s sweetheart in the film. With several prestigious awards to follow, ‘Brokeback Mountain’ was a huge success in more ways than one. The story of two gay cowboys is not the most appeaing of plotlines I have to agree, but Ledger and not forgetting his equally lusted after co-star, Jake Gyllenhall, shine like gold dust in the roles that they play. So sit back, relax and enjoy one of Ledger’s finest big-screen moments.

11:35pm Candy

Five

7:00pm Five News and Sport 7:15pm Cricket on five 8:00pm Extraordinary People: The Girls with Too Much Skin

gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

27

FIVE MINUTE FUN

FMF@gairrhydd.COM

found on facebook Housemate done something stupid?

1. Log on to the book of face Send 2. Join the group ‘Found on Facebook’ more 3. Upload embarrassing photos oddities!

4. Pick up gair rhydd on Monday and laugh

Across

Down

6. Dismissals from employment (7) 7. A native of Mexico (5) 9. Crooner Crosby (4) 10. Additions to a building (10) 11. Creativity (8) 13. Flew too close to the sun (Greek mythology) (6) 15. Augments (4) 17. Corny or fake (5) 18. Swerve (4) 19. Dwarf ornamental tree (6) 20. Set free (8) 23. Makes official (10) 26. Metrical unit of syllables (4) 27. Hues (5) 28. Take one’s clothes off (7)

1. Spectacles (10) 2. Abroad (6) 3. As Soon As Possible (4) 4. In a delicate manner (8) 5. Pocketbook (4) 6. Fifty-eight in Roman numerals (5) 8. Reprimand (7) 12. Bumpkin (5) 14. Promoted (10) 16. A person who left school before graduating (7) 17. By definition, childless (8) 21. Next to (6) 22. Graves (5) 24. Coquette (4) 25. Supreme god (Greek mythology) (4)

competition crossword

Sudok leaves u fo page 2 r

Exercise your mind...

WINonal ers ng p A aini tr sion ses

Then exercise your body at

Put your entries in the competitio

n box outside gair rhydd

Every week gair rhydd will be giving away a gym package to one lucky entrant who correctly completes the competition crossword, courtesy of Dave’s Gym.

Every winner will receive a free personal training session with one of our qualified instructors. This can be a gym workout, weight-training, boxing or Thai Boxing session. You will also receive a personalised gym programme and a free guest pass so you can come back for another workout or try one of our studio classes: choose from HipHop, Khai Bo, Bodypump and many more. This prize is worth approximately £35!

Conditions: Use of any of our facilities is subject to our terms and conditions and at the user’s own risk. An appointment must be made for the session. Prize must be claimed within four weeks of notification. It is not exchangeable for cash and is not transferable to any other party. Dave’s Gym: Tel: 029 2046 0232 E.mail: enquiries@daves-gym. co.uk Web: www.daves-gym.co.uk

NAME....

EMAIL....

How to enter: Simply complete the wordsearch opposite and drop it into the crossword competition box outside the gair rhydd office on the 4th floor of the Students’ Union. The first correct entrant to be plucked from the box every week will win the Dave’s Gym package.

28 gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

LISTINGS

LISTINGS@gairrhydd.COM

This week: Dan puts in a picture he thought was from Waiting

MUSIC

COMEDY

MONDAY MONDAY S**T AND SHINE+GINDRINKER @ CLWB IFOR BACH - Led THE IMPOTENT FURY OF THE PRIVILEGED: DANIEL KITSON @ SHERby the estimable D.C. Gates, Gindrinker are a Cardiff 2-piece on guitar, shouting and occasional cornet. 8pm. £8.50/£7 adv.

MAN THEATRE - A brilliantly quick comic mind coupled with scorching CANCER BATS+JOHNNY TRUANT+HEXES @ BARFLY - Expect unaccesimprovisation makes Daniel a regular at the top London clubs and on sible rock music and new ‘nu’ metal, whatever that may be. 7.30pm.

TV. Nominee for the Perrier Award 2001 and the winner in 2002. His £8. hilarious, charming and filthy comedy is unafraid to be different and TUESDAY ROOTS UNEARTHED: PATRICK SWEET @ ST. DAVID’S happily avoids the latest fashions and trends. A must see comedian.

HALL - Four of the best Irish traditional mu7.30pm. £10 all tickets. sicians with a wealth of experience under FRIDAY their collective belts. So, get JIGgy with it.

MIKE WILKINSON, SMUG ROBERTS, CURTIS WALKER Contact venue for info. @ JONGLEURS - Curtis Walker aka FIGHTING WITH WIRE+THE XCERTS @ BARFLY ‘The Don’ - one of black comedy’s biggest hit- hotly tipped BBC Northern Ireland favourites, ters. Curtis was awarded Best Male Stand-up Fighting With Wire, feature Jetplane Landing in the Black International Comedy Awards and guitarist Cahir O’Doherty. 8pm. £5. received the Top Carlton TV Multicultural EnterWEDNESDAY FIRST AMONG EQUALS @ tainment and Comedy Award 2001. On televiTEN FEET TALL - Cardiff based punk ‘n’ roll sion, he has cohosted Paramount City, appeared three-piece mixing rabid hard rock guitar on Jonathan Ross, Now What, The Lenny Henry solos with punk venom and a big fat slab of Show and The Stand-up Show. He is also the melody. 8pm. £3. main writer on the last two series of Channel JONAH MATRANGA+ATTENTION+FIVE 0’S 4’s The Richard Blackwood Show. I think that’s @ BARFLY - Soulful acoustic workings from a good thing...

Jonah Matranga, the man behind the bands Mike Wilkinson - Dry witted comedian from the New End Original (Onelinedrawing), Gratitude and Far. 7.30pm. £8.

North, who has Peter Kay amongst his many THURSDAY WEDNESDAY 13 @ SU - The plaudits. frontman from Frankenstein Drag Queens Smug Roberts - Award-winning character comeFrom Planet 13 and the Murderdolls, who dian from Manchester. 8pm (doors 7pm) has been going solo as Wednesday 13 since until 2:00am (In Risa). £8 all tickets 2004. Theatrical, cartoony and spooky all SATURDAY at once, he possesses a decidedly original MIKE WILKINSON, SMUG ROBERTS, CURTIS stage presence. 7.30pm. Check Venue for Wednesday 13 - This was the least scary picture WALKER @ JONGLEURS - 8pm (doors 7pm) I could find, promise. prices. until 2:00am (In Risa). £8 all tickets ROYWOLRD @ BARFLY - Melodramatic indieSUNDAY popsters suitable for those who like Talking RESURRECTED COMEDY CLUB: CHRIS CORHeads, Roxy Music, The Hoosiers or Kaiser CORAN @ SMALL O’NEILL’S- Previous winner Chiefs. 7.30pm. Check venue for prices. of ITV’s ‘Take The Mike’ comedy competition.

FRIDAY MSF LIVE MUSIC NIGHT @ CF10 8.30pm. £5 on the door.

Cardiff bands Nihilistic, The Fur Furs, Zoe Cruse, Blue Wall, Iguazo SOAP BOX OPEN MIC COMEDY NIGHT @ GLO BAR - For tickets or and the Bla Bla Bla’s play CF10 for this very worth while charity. further information, please contact the venue.

7.30pm. £3. Available from union box office/on the door.

SUNDAY SARAHBETH TUCEK+JACOB GOLDEN+GENTLE GOOD @ CLWB IFOR BACH - Why do I always run out of space on a Sunday?

The ‘Fairbridge Four’ - A Benefit Night In Aid of Fairbridge De Cymru The Glee Club 14/05/08 ◆ 7.30pm ◆ £10/£9 adv

Fairbridge De Cymru Volunteer, Rachel Harris recommends

T

his Wednesday evening there’s only one place you should be and that’s the Glee Club Cardiff Bay, where Fairbridge De Cymru are hosting a night of comic genius to raise vital funds for the charity.

The night’s headlining act is the unmissable and hugely talented Jon Richardson. Jon Richardson’s star is certainly in the ascendant, having recently won the Chortle (UK Comedy Guide) Award for best breakthrough act, and as a co-host of the Sunday morning show on BBC 6 Music with Russell Howard. Jon is a current highlight on the comedy circuit, inspiring comment like “I’ll smack his arse if he gets any funnier” from Bullseye legend Jim Bowen.

The first half of the evening will feature appearances from Ellis James who won the 2006 ‘Best Comedy Prize’ at the National Student Radio Awards and Clint Edwards an emerging talent who in 2007 set up ‘The Drones Comedy Club’ at Chapter Arts Centre Cardiff, which encourages new and emerging talent on the comedy circuit. Compering the night will be Chris Corcoran who is a regular on BBC Wales, including Big Welsh Joke, and co-presenting Max

THEATRE

MONDAY BRAINIAC LIVE @ ST. D goggles, boys and girls: Science’s arriving here with a vengeance. Sk arrives with a bang for the first ti than ever seen before on a breath the weird and wonderful. 7.30pm.

TUESDAY WAITING FOR GODOT @ Beckett’s epic stranger than stran for Godot, who never arrives. A tru £8 - £6. Showing until Saturday.

ME AND MY GIRL @ NEW THEA Cockney boy who discovers he’s Hareford... 7:30pm. Matinees 2:3 WEDNESDAY THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING EAR THEATRE - One of Wales’ most p £14 -£12.

WAITING FOR GODOT @ CHAPTER ME AND MY GIRL @ NEW THEATRE THURSDAY THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING EAR THEATRE. WAITING FOR GODOT @ CHAPTER ME AND MY GIRL @ NEW THEATRE FRIDAY ORCHESTRAL CONCERT SERIES: CHESTRA @ ST DAVID’S HALL please contact the venue directly.

WAITING FOR GODOT @ CHAPTER A ME AND MY GIRL @ NEW THEATR SATURDAY WAITING FOR GODOT @ CHAPTER A ME AND MY GIRL @ NEW THEATR SUNDAY LET’S KIOSK: ROYAL WELSH COLLE TER ARTS THEATRE. 8pm. £5 - £3.

Boyce’s World Cup Journey last autumn. His debut at Edinburgh festival gained him a four star review in the Sunday times and the British theatre guide.

The night will then be finished off by the one and only Jon Richardson, so get your mates together and get yourselves down to the Glee Club for an unmissable night of comedy and laughs. Tickets can be purchased online for £9 at www.glee.co.uk or by phone for £10 by calling 0871 472 0400. A limited number of tickets will also be available on the door for £10, but with this line up, it’s bound to be a sell out!

By purchasing a ticket you will be raising money for Fairbridge De Cymru, to ensure the charity’s vital work supporting vulnerable and disengaged young people from Cardiff can continue. Fairbridge De Cymru helps those young people that other organisations find difficult to reach, and who are consequently desperately in need of help. With your support, Fairbridge De Cymru can make a difference to these young people’s lives, and give them the skills and confidence they need to enjoy a future full of choice and opportunity. Rachel Harris, a fourth year Philosophy Cardiff Student and Volunteer at Fairbridge De Cymru is excited about the event - “It should be a fantastic night, the talent is really high. I’ve seen first hand the important work that Fairbridge do for the community; they really do make a difference to young people’s lives. What better way can there be to spend an evening, having a laugh and raising money for charity at the same time!”

For more information about the work of Fairbridge De Cymru please visit www.fairbridge.org.uk/de%5Fcymru/

Students’ Union, Park Place, 02920 387421 www.cardiffstudents.com ◆ Med Club, Neuadd Meirionydd, Heath Park 02920 744948 ◆ Clwb Ifor Bach (The Wels 02920 399939 www.clubmetropolitan.com ◆ Dempseys, Castle Street 02920 252024 ◆ Iotas, 7 Mill Lane 02920 225592 ◆ Incognito, Park Place 02920 412 www.cafejazzcardiff.com ◆ The Riverbank Hotel, Despenser Street www.riverbankjazz.co.uk ◆ St. David’s Hall, The Hayes 02920 878444 www.stdavidshallcardif uk ◆ The New Theatre, Park Place 02920 878889 www.newtheatrecardiff.co.uk ◆ The Sherman Theatre, Senghennydd Road 02920 646900 www.shermanthea Stadium Can’t miss it. www.millenniumstadium.com ◆ The Point, Cardiff Bay, 029 2046 0873 www.thepointcardiffbay.com ◆ Tommy’s Bar, Howard Gardens (off

gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

29

LISTINGS

LISTINGS@gairrhydd.COM

g for Godot but isn’t, and leaves it there just because he can.

E & ARTS

GOING OUT

DAVID’S HALL - Strap on your safety s greatest and most volatile show is ky One’s multi award-winning Brainiac ime live on stage more mischievous hless ride through the wild world of . Check venue for prices. @ CHAPTER ARTS CENTRE - Samuel nge play in which the characters wait uely stunning black comedy. 7.30pm.

MONDAY FUN FACTORY @ SOLUS, SU - Cardiff’s own alternative mu-

ATRE - The story of Bill Snibson, a in line to become the next Earl of 30pm Thu & Sat. £17 - £10.

SPIN @ THE UNION - Or as it used to be called, before all these freshers turned up and started shafting Oceana, Rubber Duck.

RNEST: MAPPA MUNDI @ SHERMAN popular theatre companies. 7.30pm.

R ARTS CENTRE. E.

RNEST: MAPPA MUNDI @ SHERMAN

R ARTS CENTRE. E.

: RUSSIAN STATE SYMPHONY ORFor tickets or further information, .

ARTS CENTRE. RE.

ARTS CENTRE. RE.

EGE OF MUSIC AND DRAMA @ CHAP.

sic night. Also features DJing by Oddsoc and bands put on by LMS. I (Dan) went there last week and I very much enjoyed myself, desptie being harrassed by a woman dressed as ‘The Spirit of Jazz’ as there was a Mighty Boosh party. 10pm - 2am. Free entry with NUS. £3 otherwise.

THE LISTINGS TOP FIVE...

THINGS TO DO TO RELIEVE EXAM STRESS... ... BECAUSE THERE’S NAFF ALL GOING ON WITH SOCIETIES THIS WEEK.

TUESDAY

IF YOU’RE HONESTLY looking at Tuesday night in the listings for a night out at this time of year then shame. On. You. Stay in with book, a journal, lecture notes - anything!

WEDNESDAY THURSDAY

BOUNCE @ WALKABOUT - I should probably make the most of this Alladdin’s Cave of cheap drinks, loose women and angry men but I think, finally, I may have grown out of it!

SOCIETIES THURSDAY The KRISHNA CONSCIOUSNESS society presents The Nature of Love and Relationships. A once football crazy, graffiti drawing youth who now turned his life around has been practicing in Krishna Consciousness for over 11 years is giving a discussion on his views on types of love and what a loving relationship comprises of. What do we look for of a relationship? Isn’t what we’re all looking for is to be loved in some form to find happiness? Everyone’s had some recollection of what they believe the meaning/feeling of love is and the pain it can bring…this is a chance to express and give challenging views or give to what others may believe. Is there a true description to love, is it possible? Rona Griffiths Room (4th floor SU) 7-9pm. Open to everyone! FREE VEG MEAL [Events hosted every week including vegetarian cooking, yoga and meditation]

Colin Fry - A Spectacular Night of Clairvoyance St. David’s Hall 14/05/08 ◆ Contact venue for info.

Listings Editor, Dan Jones recommends

C

olin Fry – celebrity, TV show host, spiritualist and berevement councilor – your all-in-one guide and medium to all things ghostly and other-worldly. Good job then if that’s what you’re looking for, because the man himself is coming to Cardiff for two, yes that’s two nights only! Oh what lucky people we are.

Widely regarded as one of the world’s finest spiritualist mediums, Colin Fry was born in 1962 and turned professional at the age of 17. He has spent many years sharing his spiritual philosophy with audiences around the world and in 1999 was made Principal of Rambsbergsgarden International College of Spiritual Science. In 2002 he presented his first TV show, 6ixth Sense shown on Living TV, regularly attracting a million-plus audience.

Colin believes that ‘for those who believe, no evidence is necessary and for those who don’t believe, no evidence is ever enough’.

An open mind is definitely what is needed then this evening, as the sceptic in me is really beginning to wonder why I’m recommending it to you. According to Colin Fry’s official website, he has been contacted by police forced who need his psychic abilities

1. Take a walk around Roath or Bute park. Stunning scenary in the middle of the big city that will help clear the mind. Aaaaaaah...

2. Sink a pint in one of the many great beer gardens around Cathays (weather permitting), that will help you forget your woes.

If you drink enough, that is.

3. See a film - we suggest something mindless and otherwise crap if you weren’t so bogged down with all that knowledge.

4. Find a jazz night - for some reason I find jazz relaxing.

Recommended is Ten Feet Tall’s Jazz night this Friday.

8pm - 11pm (finishes in time for an early night). £4.

5. Find an acoustic night - what’s better than being serenaded by the delicately plucked strings of an acoustic guitar? We recommend Late Night Sunday Live at Buffalo, or Ten Feet Tall’s own acoustic night (8pm - 11pm. £2.)

to help them locate bodies or to determine whether a missing person is alive or dead. Really? A lot can be said for our police forces if they’re using the psychic abilities of celebrity medium to catch criminals…

So, what exactly you can expect from this evening is somewhat mysterious, and, well, if I’m being honest, who amongst the vast swathes of people who read the Listings pages will actually go and see a “Spectacular Evening of Clairvoyance”? Sod it, do yourselves a favour and go see the Fairbridge comedy night as recommended opposite.

sh Club), 11 Womanby Street 02920 232199 www.clwb.net ◆ Barfly, Kingsway, Tickets: 08709070999 www.barflyclub.com/cardiff ◆ Metros, Bakers Row 2190 ◆ Liquid, St. Mary Street 02920645464 ◆ The Philharmonic, 76-77 St. Mary Street 02920 230678 ◆ Café Jazz, 21 St. Mary Street 02920 387026 ff.co.uk ◆ Chapter Arts Centre, Market Road, Canton 02920 304400 www.chapter.org ◆ Wales Millennium Centre, Cardiff Bay 0870 0402000 www.wmc.org. atre.co.uk ◆ The Glee Club, Mermaid Quay 0870 2415093 www.glee.co.uk ◆ Cardiff International Arena, Mary Ann Street 02920 224488 ◆ The Millennium Newport Road) 02920 416192 ◆

14 gairrhydd

FEATURES

OCTOBER.22.2007 FEATURES@gairrhydd.COM

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MAY.12.2008

PROBLEM PAGE

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From the Desk of

D E T

31

e m so

d n Ha

He’s a ruddy good lad.

Ted Handsome’s Reasons To Be Miserable In The Summer An Occasional Series

Let Joy be unfettered! It is Summer again! Now every Land Management student is out airing their pasty pegs, framed by their idiotic uniform of Bermuda shorts and flip-flops. Now, I do not know which thunderous moron came up with the idea that it is apparently alright to allow the great unwashed to display their mishaped hoofs while I am trying to disapprove of gay marriage, but who ever it is, deserves a right royal kicking. In short, I hate Summer, because it means that the proles suddenly get ideas above their their station, and the last thing that I want to see is some lobster red, balding fuckwit with poorly spelt prison tattoo bellowing at me from a beer garden.

No. 1 - Frisbee

I fail to understand why pillocks in ironic trucker hats cream their Calvin Kleins over the prospect of ruining my bloody afternoon by hurling a plastic disk around and making cod-Atlantic sounds like they actually say The OC as a way of life, rather than the cautionary tale that it should have been. Another element to this debacle that completely perplexes me, is the supposed communal spirit that this sort of activity seems to demand. I don’t see why I should be forced to engage with intellectual subnormals just because their toy fell at my feet.

I can’t count how many snapped frisbees I own, but it never fails to makes me smile.

No. 2 - Old Men Who Insist On Having Their Shirts Off In The Park

We get it. You aren’t dead yet. Big Whoop. There is no need to impose your horrific sagging chest to an unwilling general population. There is nothing more unappetising than some leathering lumpen oaf spooning himself out on a fraying, tartan blanket, topped off with a wisp of greying chest hair, sitting atop their swelling bellies like clouds swathing a misty mountain. You all make me sick.

No. 3 - Flip - Flops

I have saved the worst of the very worst ‘til the end of my column. How anybody can truly believe that strapping two plastic sheaths to their feet can act as adequate footwear. Nobody wants to see your fucking trotters, covered in an amalgam of sweat, street filth and tramp’s piss, on display like the two last chops in the butcher’s window. The only saving grace of these monstrosities, is the fact that I can chase these imbeciles, knowing full well that they cannot run effectively, thus rendering them vulnerable to my frenzied thrashing of them with birch twigs. The stupid, Nuts reading, WKD drinking, Abercrombie & Fitch wearing, Frisbee throwing, Shorts wearing, Land Management studying tossers.

A letter about ESSAY HELL Dear Ted, Nobody can possibly understand how awful my life is at present. I am spending every God given hour in the library toiling like some kind of common oaf, reading books of all things! Anyone would think that learning was part of university life!

If the media is anything to go by, I was under the impression that all university students did was smoke narcotics, binge drink and vandalise street furniture. Now some arse has told me that all those lectures actually meant something and I should have paid more attention. That’s all inconsequential now, as I’m stuck doing these bastard things. Have you any advice for a struggling student?

Yours Dr. Simon Buckles Roath Dr. Buckles, You are quite right about essays.

Who are the university to tell you how to live your life? It’s not as if this is some kind of academic institution that admits people according to their academic achievements.

How dare they assume that there should be some form of assessment to analyse your intellectual development? Well, now that you have to deal with their fascistic ways, you’ve got to learn how to subvert and destroy. No fusty old crumbling sandcastle of a man is going to tell what you do and don’t

know about the History of Feminism in English Literature because of how you phrased a sentence!

Let’s see him reference a broken jaw with footnotes, eh? There is no need for anybody to try and justify their knowledge of a particular subject with a forced rumination of 1600 words or so, for the benefit of a glorified teacher who tries to earn your respect by not drinking coke and reading the Guardian.

Bollocks to that, have any of you bothered getting a real job? No, thought not. I bloody hate students.

Yours Ted

A letter about dancing Dear Ted, Who are you?/Who, who, who, who?/Who are you?/Who, who, who, who?/Who are you?/Who, who, who, who?/Who are you?/ Who, who, who, who?/I woke up in a Soho doorway/A policeman knew my name/He said “You can go sleep at home tonight/If you can get up and walk away”/I staggered back to the underground/ And the breeze blew back my hair/I remember throwin’ punches around/And preachin’ from my chair/Well, who are you? (Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)/I really wanna know (Who are you?

Who, who, who, who?)/Tell me, who are you? (Who are you? Who,

who, who, who?)/‘Cause I really wanna know (Who are you? Who, who, who, who?)/I took the tube back out of town/Back to the Rollin’ Pin/I felt a little like a dying clown/With a streak of Rin Tin Tin/I stretched back and I hiccupped/And looked back on my busy day/Eleven hours in the Tin Pan/God, there’s got to be another way/Who are you?/Ooh wa ooh wa ooh wa ooh wa .../Who are you?/Who, who, who, who?/ Who are you?/Who, who, who, who?/Who are you?/Who, who, who, who?/Who are you?/Who, who, who, who?/I know there’s a place you walked/Where love falls from the trees/My heart is like a

broken cup/I only feel right on my knees/I spit out like a sewer hole Yet still receive your kiss/How can I measure up to anyone now/ After such a love as this?/Who are you?/Who, who, who, who?/Who are you?/Who, who, who, who?/ Who are you?/Who, who, who, who?/Who are you?/Who, who, who, who?

Yours, P. Townsend England Dear Mr. Townsend, I am Ted Handsome. I do have one question for you though, where’s the book you were researching?

Ted xxx

Dear lovely reader, this week, I have mainly been kicking swans. Now before any of you goody-two-shoes complain about ‘animal cruelty’, hear me out. Imagine my horror, while looking forward to eating a lovely 99 flake, some glorified duck ambles up to me like a drunken Norwegian sailor and knocks the fucker clean out of my hand. I was apoplectic with rage. I saw red, and grabbed the oily cretin betwixt my gnarled and weatherbeaten hands, and gripped harder than a Thai ladyboy. I wrenched its extended gullet with the force and vigour of a recent divorcee having their first tearful angry episode of onanism.

Soon, the beast lay vanquished at my noble feet, swathed in a mixture of swanblood, mansweat and mint choc chip ice cream. Although, I did get my comeuppance; the man had run out of Feasts. TH xxx

32 gairrhydd

GRAB!

MAY.12.2008 COMPETITIONS@gairrhydd.COM

WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN!

WIN a Pair of Tickets to The Summer Ball 2008

T

his year’s Cardiff University Summer Ball is set to be the best university ball of the year across the UK. Already confirmed acts are the legendary Zane Lowe and chart-hitters Scouting For Girls! This year the ticket sales have rocketed and if you have not yet bought your ticket then, quite frankly, what are you thinking?

There is a slightly tense atmosphere which has fallen over Cardiff University, with students panicking about dissertation deadlines and forthcoming exams. The Summer Ball offers everyone chance to completely relax and have fun, celebrating the end of the year in style! Last year The Feeling played live to thousands of students and the atmosphere was incredible, this year there is no doubt Scouting For Girls will amaze the crowds and get everyone up and chanting “Elvis isn’t dead!”. As well as a variety of music there will be all kinds of cuisine available to you and also you have the chance to battle it out on the Dodgems.

The Summer Ball is taking place on Friday 13th June this year, but fear not there is no chance this day will be unlucky for you if you attend the ball! gair rhydd has a pair of tickets to give away for the Summer Ball, so if you are all glammed up in your tux or ball gown with nowhere to go then enter this competition and you could be attending the event of the year!!

All you have to do is answer this question and email your name and address to the email above: What song are Scouting For Girls famous for?

a

Scouting For Girls are playing at The Summer Ball!!

a) Away From Here b) She’s So Lovely c) Bullets

WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN!

gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

SPORT

SPORT@gairrhydd.COM Dyleth Marshall Windsurfing Reporter THE BUSA Championships for Windsurfing were held over the weekend of 25-27th April at Calshot Beach near Southampton.

With 15 members of the team making their way down the day after the AU ball, Cardiff were looking forward to racing after one of their best years of competition so far.

On the Saturday, the weather conditions brought fantastic sunshine but little wind but this did not deter the racers who completed eight races including slalom and course racing. At the end of a hard day of competition, Gemma Lewis won all her races to come away with the Gold medal. The rest of team Cardiff put in a great effort against strong competition, and were unlucky not to come away with any medals.

At the medal ceremony on Sunday the results from the Student Windsurfing Association (SWA) series, which includes racing, freestyle, and wave sailing were also presented.

The SWA series has taken place throughout the year with events all over the country with Cardiff University hosting both the West SWA core and wave events. Cardiff has dominated through out the year and was rewarded with Gemma Lewis winning the overall ladies advanced racing division with Sarah Gaskell coming in a close second.

In the wave series Ala Rozwadowska ended the series coming third, whilst James Goody came second in the male advanced racing and Seb Willis was third in the men’s wave series. These results are particularly impressive

33

considering the high standard of competition, which included Olympic and international racers.

Throughout the year, both Sarah Gaskell and Ala Rozwadowska have put in a magnificent effort that has seen them rewarded with second and third place in the overall ladies series, and they will be greatly missed in the next year of competition.

With a proposed merger of BUSA and the SWA, Cardiff is set to come away with more recognition from their efforts throughout the year. It has been a fantastic season for Cardiff Windsurfers, who are all eager to build on their successes in the coming year.

Surf’s Out

WINDSURF: Golden Waters

Bridging the gap Ian King Frisbee Reporter LAST WEEKEND saw Cardiff’s Ultimate Frisbee team, “NoFrills”, crowned national champions at the BUSA University Outdoor Nationals in York.

The victory was testament to the solid leadership and unyielding spirit in what has been a remarkable process of rebuilding and development for a club that lost all but two first team players in 2006.

The tournament began with an emphatic win for Cardiff over Newcastle.

Many had not given Cardiff a chance before this game and questioned whether they were even contenders for the title. Their next match was against Cambridge and Cardiff found themselves 8-9 down until Tony Fuller stepped up when it mattered most with inspirational offensive and defensive plays to seal victory in what would ultimately turn out to be a warm-up for the final.

A strong consistent offensive from Ian King and Chris Griggs-Trevarthen gave Cardiff a comfortable victory over Brunel and saw the team top their pool. By winning their pool, Cardiff drew Leeds and after dispatching them they drew “RoShamBo” from Edinburgh. With Edinburgh having been undefeated in all university open, mixed and women’s events at a

national level for over two years, and having a squad boasting a number of Great Britain players, they were certainly pre-tournament favourites.

However, they succumbed to Cambridge due to a last minute ‘huck-andhope’ play in the quarter-final.

The semi-final saw Cardiff up against local rivals Bristol “Mythago”, who had beaten Cardiff in March on Pontcanna playing fields at the regional qualifying event. Bristol, led

by Great Britain star Colin Shaw, are known for their tactical astuteness and the ability to adjust their style of play depending on the opposition. Having played against Bristol on a regular basis over the last few seasons Cardiff were well prepared, and they raced into 5-0 lead after just 18 minutes.

However, a slow response to a shift in defensive tactics by Bristol saw them claw Cardiff’s lead back to just

one point at 8-7. At this point Cardiff unleashed defensive hero Lee Taylor, who was given the job of man-marking Bristol’s GB playmaker and his performance helped Cardiff to blow Bristol away and win 12-10. Taylor’s performance caused Shaw to declare after the match that Taylor was “one of the best players [he has] seen for a long time”.

The final was a rematch of the earlier pool game with Cardiff again taking on Cambridge. Another close affair saw the teams never separated by more than a single point until the very end when Cardiff’s American recruit, and MVP of the final, Dan Kalb, “threaded the needle” with a pass to vice-captain Jack Maidment in the end zone. Victory belonged to captain Dan Wiseman’s Cardiff side, the majority of whom will still be eligible to defend their crown next year.

FRISBEE: Cardiff?

34 gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008

SPORT

SPORT@gairrhydd.COM

Run, Forrest, Run Jack Zorab Sports Editor THE CARDIFF Half-Marathon 2008 is coming around again. Registration is now open and if it is anything like last year the places will go very quickly.

Sign up as soon as possible to avoid missing out on a place. The club are aiming to get as many people as possible involved so all are welcome to sign up.

The Cardiff Half is an easy course for first timers so if anyone wants to enter to just get around the course or for those that want to get a PB then competing is well recommended.

There is always a great atmosphere and lots of support along the course

right down to the bay.

The run takes place on Sunday October 19 so it is a good incentive to keep fit over the summer. You can sign up online or send a cheque in the post.online http://www.cardiffmarathon.org/ A Facebook group is in the process of being set-up so watch this space and join up so we can keep you updated.

Even if you have not really competed in a race before do consider the Half as there is still plenty of time to train and you will get a great sense of achievement once you cross the finish line.

Find out even more online: http:// www.cardiffmarathon.org/

Treble, Treble FOOTBALL: Treble-up

Lisa Franklin Football Reporter CARDIFF Ladies’ 1sts ................ 6 SWANSEA Ladies’ 1sts .............. 1 CARDIFF UNIVERSITY travelled up to Aberystwyth to face Swansea in a rematch of the Varsity game played two weeks previously.

In the searing heat, Cardiff started well when a sublime pass from Jen Fildes allowed Alex Joannides to slot away the first of Cardiff’s six. The play was even from both sides, with Cardiff and Swansea both wanting to take the cup, but after a solid period of play, a composed Sarah Stimpson controlled the ball in the area and finished with a successful shot to the top right hand FOOTBALL: No ball-handling allowed

corner, securing a two goal lead.

The remainder of the first half was hard-fought with Cardiff conceding a late goal, giving Swansea a glimmer of hope in bringing the game back in their favour.

Cardiff started the second half in a dominating fashion, with Mel West tapping in a Rosie Christos cross to secure one of her three goals, the others following soon after, making the score 5-1.

Cardiff battled on and kept Swansea from scoring, despite the soaring tension and stress on the field. The final goal came from an insightful run by full back Miki Burdus down the left hand side, she ran past two players before slotting her first goal of the season in the final game.

PHOTO: ED SALTER

Varsity re-lived

Richard Jefferies Football Reporter CARDIFF Men’s 1sts .................. 6

PHOTO: MATT HORWOOD

ABERYSTWYTH Men’s 1sts ........ 2 CARDIFF OVERCAME a succession of obstacles to retain the Welsh Cup in emphatic fashion.

Disadvantaged by external conditions Cardiff cruised to a 3-1 half time lead before repeating the score-line in the second half.

Cardiff made one change from the semi final winning team, with Adam Wise returning at the heart of the defence. With little time for pre match preparation, any thoughts of a shaky performance were dispelled early as Cardiff dominated. Crucially, they managed to turn their advantages in possession and territory into goals, with a typically cool finish from Dom Connor rounding off a neat passing move.

Hogan silenced the home crowd with his part in the second goal.

James Ford’s back-pass was played downfield by Cardiff’s keeper as he sent Hogan through on goal. Cardiff were then denied a glorious chance, with Hogan’s cross-shot turned in by captain Andre Stairmand, only for the goal to be ruled out for offside.

Play continued in a similar fashion for most of the half, with Cardiff enjoying the majority of the possession.

This seemed to allow for complacency, and Aberystwyth grabbed themselves a lifeline as half time approached.

Not to be outdone, Cardiff scored almost immediately from the restart.

Dogged determination from lone striker Kwame Asare set Stairmand away down the left channel, and his cut-back was drilled under the goalkeeper by Hogan.

Aber’s long ball game created several chances early on, and they soon scored another goal from a poor defensive clearance. Cardiff were forced into a change, thankfully substituting Hywel Pegler for the injured Jack Jarvis in midfield; Pegler proved to be the driving force behind Cardiff’s second half performance. Rejuvenating the attack, it was no surprise when he created Cardiff’s 4th goal.

Strong defence hindered impressive play from Hogan and Asare down the right flank, with Pegler eventually receiving the ball deep in midfield. He showed vision and pinpoint accuracy to immediately switch the ball to the unmarked Connor, whose low shot into the bottom corner gave the keeper no chance.

Cardiff stretched their lead to three clear goals before Dom Connor showed tremendous awareness in ignoring the ball from his offside position, allowing Hogan to score. Despite protests that Connor had been in an offside position the referee allowed the goal.

Cardiff could have run riot, as wasteful finishing and some topdrawer saves from Aberystwyth’s keeper kept the score respectable.

However, Cardiff then fell victim to a refereeing injustice as Sean Hogan was hacked down on the edge of the

box. The referee failed to spot the possible advantage as Connor beared down on goal, and the resulting free kick from Ford was tipped over by the keeper at full stretch.

Aber’s keeper again had to be alert as he made an impressive double save, kicking away Hogan’s low drive before recovering to palm Connor’s follow up effort to safety. Minutes later Connor, striving for a third hat trick of the season, failed when an unsuspecting Hogan inadvertently blocked his stinging goalbound shot on the line.

There was still time for one more goal, and it was Cardiff who rounded off the scoring with A Sare’s welldeserved goal, the big target man poking home from close range after he was found unmarked in the box. Asare has been the unsung hero of Cardiff’s successful season and was delighted to have finished his University career on a high note.

The final whistle sparked celebrations from the Cardiff contingent, which included both the watching womens’ rugby and football teams. Captain Andre Stairmand bowed out with an emotional speech, emphasising his pride at leading such a talented group of players to a hat trick of successes in a remarkable BUSA season.

For many of the players, this game signalled a triumphant end to their university football careers. However, with the nucleus of the team staying on for next season, Cardiff will be looking to build on this season’s successes with another impressive BUSA campaign next time around.

gairrhydd

MAY.12.2008 SPORT@gairrhydd.COM

Glam-orous Cardiff take Welsh Cup Roz Lambe Rugby Reporter CARDIFF Ladies’ 1sts .............. 26 GLAMORGAN Ladies’ 1sts ......... 0

try. Again Molloy converted and the score now stood at 14-0.

Glamorgan fought back and managed to enter Cardiff’s half, however the defence did not falter. A loose kick dangerously close to Cardiff’s tryline almost resulted in a try but a great cover tackle and jackal by Molloy re-secured possession and eventually led to a scrum in Cardiff’s favour. A brilliant dummy switch between Lenan and Shepherd saw Lenan run the length of the pitch to ground the ball under the posts. The conversion was added by Molloy, which took the score to 21-0 at half time.

Following the interval, it was clear that Glamorgan had tired. Possession was always kicked away however the Cardiff wingers and fullback were faultless. A number of penetrating runs were made by Fran Acuna and Fran

Thistlethwaite, which enabled Cardiff to attack the Glamorgan tryline. The team continued to press but despite some good build up play, were kept out by a solid Glamorgan defence. For the rest of the match, Cardiff remained in Glamorgan’s 22, trading scrums and lineouts. Brilliant forward play resulted in 100% possession at the lineout and led to tries from Kerry Boxall and Anna Soryal, however both were unfortunately disallowed. Nevertheless, the pack remained strong and their hard work was eventually rewarded by a try from Molloy.

With minutes remaining, Cardiff defended hard and were unlucky not to get a fifth try. The final score stood at 26-0 and this terrific win saw both the old and new girls playing some of the best rugby this season.

CRICKET: Catch it

PHOTO: JAMES PEROU

CARDIFF LADIES saw out the season in style with a well deserved win against league rivals Glamorgan in the final of the Welsh Cup. The teams had met twice previously each with one win apiece, so it was crunch time Cardiff began well, pushing straight up into Glamorgan’s 22 due to the excellent platform set up by the forwards.

Despite the heat, the team pressured well and forced a number of clearance kicks by Glamorgan. Each time, the ball was expertly gathered by Anwen

Harry who secured the ball and made up ground. It was not long before Cardiff added the first points of the day after Anna Soryal skilfully took the ball at a lineout. Scrum half Ceri Hill shipped the ball out wide to fly half Kat Lenan who did an excellent show and go, rounding 6 defenders to touch down under the posts. The conversion was added by Claire Molloy, taking the score to 7-0.

The momentum continued with excellent breaks from Jess Bain, Holly Morris and Louise Steel. Again the forwards led by example and good handling, coupled with quick reactions, allowed Cardiff to advance into Glamorgan territory. Capitalising on the overlap, the ball was shipped out to centre Simone Shepherd who drew a number of players and offloaded to Roz Lambe for the

Cardiff whip out their Cox Ben Walker Cricket Reporter CARDIFF MEN’S Cricket Firsts picked up their first win of the season with a proficient eight wicket win over Oxford Brooks last Sunday.

After a disappointing loss at the hands of Solent the previous Wednesday, in which they posted a meager 128 from their overs in a rain reduced game, the team needed to get their BUSA season rolling.

Cardiff won the toss by forfeit, due to the late arrival of Oxford, and chose to bowl. This unexpected turn of events seemed to have affected Cardiff more than Oxford as they seemed unfocused in the early going, as Oxford got off to a good start. After Ben Walker had picked up a barely deserved wicket with the last ball of his spell, Josh Bess and Adam Bennett came on and tightened things off for the home side.

Bess bowled his ten overs straight through to finish with excellent figures of 10-6-16-2, while Bennett bowled through the pain barrier to capture his first wicket for Cardiff. Captain Ben Orr kept it tight at the other end but Oxford still looked likely to post a decent

score at 127 - 3 from 36 overs.

This idea was put paid to by some excellent bowling in the last ten overs

by Peter Exley (1 - 33) and Al Trevarthan (2 - 12), and Trevarthen’s spell would have been even better but for two dropped catches. Both bowled accurately and with good pace to restrict Oxford to 166 - 8.

Cardiff were confident of chasing down this score but knew that a vast improvement was needed from their batting after poor efforts previously.

Dean Cox and Naeman SymondsBaig opened up and showed exactly what was needed to make a score on this pitch. Cox was the more aggressive of the two but both valued their wicket and punished any poor deliveries that came their way.

By the time Symonds-Baig (40) perished, caught in the deep, Cardiff had 135 on the board and the game was effectively over. Cox also went for an excellent 70 but John Mills (10*) and Matt Jones (10*) saw Cardiff comfortably home with 8 wickets and 15 overs to spare.

Cardiff now face Southampton on Wednesday knowing another victory would dispel any fears of relegation and get their season firmly back on track.

Cardiff won toss Oxford Brookes Innings

Cardiff Innings

Bailey c Yau b Bess ................. 29

Cox c Lewis b Simmonds .......... 70

Lewis c Orr b Walker ................ 12

Symonds-Baig c Schofield b Watson ................................ ....40

Schofield run out ..................... 40 Cossins c Yau b Boss .............. 10 Martin c Orr b Bennett ............. 20 Watson c Symonds-Baig b Exley .. 1 Soulsby c Symonds-Baig b Trevarthen ................................. 3 Hazell not out ......................... 19

Jones not out ........................... 10 Mills not out ............................ 10 Extras ..................................... 37 TOTAL (for 2, 35 Overs) ......... 167 Bowling:

Extras .................................... 28

Walker 6-0-42-1, Exley 10-2-33-1, Bennett 10-2-37-1, Bess 10-6-17-2, Orr 9-3-35-0, Trevathen 5-0-12-2

TOTAL (50 Overs) ................. 166

CARDIFF win by 8 wickets

Hutley c Bennett b Trevarthen..... 1 Simmonds not out ..................... 2

35

SPORT

SHOOTING: Check out these guns

Bang!

Nadia Cracknell Shooting Reporter

FURTHER TO their success at the BUSA indoor shooting championships in March this year, Cardiff University Rifle Club have brought the 2007-08 competitive season to a spectacular close.

Last month the Cardiff shooting team travelled to Warrington to attend the BUSA Outdoor shooting championships. Shooting targets at 50 metre and 100 yard distances, team members battled against difficult conditions to bring in a fantastic series of scores.

Three of Cardiff’s shooters scored in the top twenty positions, Captain Eric Carter coming in 10th with a score of 764 out of 800 possible points, Luke Stevens in 14th (765/800) and Winston Lewis in 15th (765/800). Individual success was followed by rewards in the team events. The Cardiff ‘A’ Quartet, consisting of Carter, Stevens, Lewis and Nadia Cracknell, took the bronze medal. Having missed out on silver by just 4 points, they were still proud of their achievement; this was the first medal winning performance for Cardiff at the outdoor championships in many years. The success of the quartet was equalled by the Cardiff ‘A’ pairs, where Carter and Lewis again took Bronze medals dropping just 26 points out of 400.

Returning from the outdoor championships, the club eagerly awaited the final results of the BUSA Inter-University League competition. Cardiff ‘A’ team hoped to successfully defend their BUSA title, won in their division the previous year. They were not disappointed. Cardiff ‘A’ team: consisting of Carter, Lewis, Cracknell, James Lothian, Paddy Seal and Alex Mylles, stormed to the top of their division, beating top UK shooting teams to take their second consecutive BUSA Gold in the league, scoring of 5737 points out of 6000. The Cardiff ‘B’ team excelled further, including Stevens, Rhys Bowley, Rob Beer, Andrew Barley, Jonathan Bancroft and Dave Williams, gaining the top spot in their division, 425 points ahead of their nearest rivals, Exeter University, furnishing the club with its first BUSA double Gold team performance.

Carter ended his captaincy with bronze medal position in the BUSA UK Postal Individual competition, cementing the overall achievement of the teams. Lewis also scored in the top twenty UK shooters.

With a total of 3 gold medal and 3 bronze medal performances throughout the academic year, this has been the club’s most successful competitive season to date.

Sport 14 gairrhydd

gairrhydd

FEATURES

OCTOBER.22.2007

INSIDE: Welsh Cup results, ShootingFEATURES@ win BUSA Gold.COM gairrhydd and Cardiff’s cricket season gathers pace

STEELY SHAUN TAKES MASTERS CROWN

Shaun Hill takes Masters Title in tense Uni final Jon Hillard Snooker Reporter SHAUN HILL was crowned Cardiff University Snooker Club Masters Champion after defeating top seed Ben Chung 3 - 2 in the season ending finale.

The result also meant that Chung missed out on being the overall Club Champion, with Neil Fairbrother claiming the accolade by just two points.

Hill almost exited the tournament in the last-16, pipping Dom Osborne on the final black of a deciding frame. In the quarter finals, Hill defeated third seed Joe Merola 2 - 0 with a 35 break.

His semi final opponent was Fairbrother, who had to overcome David Eames in the quarter-final. Fairbrother battled hard but Hill was the victor in two close frames, leaving Fairbrother with a nail biting wait to see if he would be crowned Club champion.

In the other half of the draw top seed Chung won 2 - 0 over qualifier Craig Nunes before a tricky quarter final against Ben Davies, another deciding frame black ball winner over Jon Hilliard. Chung put in a good performance to win 2 - 0. Talented fresher David Blake defeated Huw Davies 2 - 1 in an entertaining quarter final to book a semi-final match up with Chung who knew that he needed to win the tournament to be crowned

Club Champion ahead of Fairbrother.

Chung again rose to the challenge with an impressive 2 - 0 victory.

Chung took the opening frame of the final before Hill took control of the next two to move 2 - 1 ahead. Chung managed to force a decider with a dogged performance in frame four.

But it was to no avail as Hill saved his best to last, early runs of 29 and 22 helped him to a 64 - 0 lead and there was no way back for Chung.

It was a successful end to the season for the snooker club, which can now look forward to the next academic year with the new Cuefactor League and the continuation of the established Cardiff University Open Series (CUOS).

-GAIR RHYDD AND QUENCH MAGAZINE IS PUBLISHED BY UNIVERSITY UNION CARDIFF, PARK PLACE, CARDIFF CF10 3QN

REGISTERED AS A NEWSPAPER AT THE POST OFFICE GAIR RHYDD RESERVES THE RIGHT TO EDIT ALL CONTRIBUTIONS THE VIEWS EXPRESSED ARE NOT NECESSARILY THOSE OF THE PUBLISHERS THE GAIR RHYDD IS WRITTEN, DESIGNED, TYPESET AND OUTPUT BY STUDENTS OF CARDIFF UNIVERSITY n D’ARCY “GEORGE, YOU GAVE ME LIFE” n MEDIA AWARDS PRE-DRINKS BECOMES BATTLE OF THE SEXES n SAM USES THE ‘BIRTHDAY’ EXCUSE FOR NIGHT OUT n AMY WILL GIVE 'MASSAGES' FOR SPEECH GAGS n GR’S HUW CLAIMS ‘WOMAN TROUBLES’ IN QUARTERS EXIT n HAVE YOU EVER EXPERIENCED THE JACK (ZORAB) HAMMER? n D’ARCY’S MISSUS: POT NOODLE & A WANK? n SPORT: BEST SECTION 2007 n SPORT: BEST SECTION 2008? n ANDY ‘WHAT ARE YOU DOING AT THE WEEKEND? NUDGE NUDGE’ RENNISON n SPEECHES! n VERY EXCITING!!!!

gairrhydd

MAY.19.2008

37

FIVE MINUTE FUN

FMF@gairrhydd.COM

found on facebook Housemate done something stupid?

1. Log on to the book of face Send 2. Join the group ‘Found on Facebook’ more 3. Upload embarrassing photos oddities!

4. Pick up gair rhydd on Monday and laugh

Across

Down

9. Prevailing weather (7) 10. Raise up (7) 11. Emotionally excited (7) 12. An epoch dating back about 20 million years (7) 13. Survival (9) 15. An ancient city in Asia Minor (5) 16. Cutting tool (7) 19. Pioneer (7) 20. Sporting venue (5) 21. Betrayal (9) 25. Mediterranean sailing ship (7) 26. An annual physical examination (7) 28. Lack of attention (7) 29. Duo (7)

1. Found in gasoline (6) 2. Two-part doors that are hinged together (6) 3. Gentle blows (4) 4. Dampen (6) 5. Circular-knit (8) 6. Devoted to pleasure (10) 7. Fabric (8) 8. Savior (8) 14. Investigator (10) 16. Providing employees (8) 17. An orientation or philosophy (8) 18. Withdraws (8) 22. Hostility (6) 23. An agreement involving money in trust (6) 24. Screamed (6) 27. An unpleasant fate (4)

competition crossword

Sudok leaves u fo page 2 r

Exercise your mind...

WINonal ers ng p A aini tr sion ses

Then exercise your body at

Put your entries in the competitio

n box outside gair rhydd

Every week gair rhydd will be giving away a gym package to one lucky entrant who correctly completes the competition crossword, courtesy of Dave’s Gym.

Every winner will receive a free personal training session with one of our qualified instructors. This can be a gym workout, weight-training, boxing or Thai Boxing session. You will also receive a personalised gym programme and a free guest pass so you can come back for another workout or try one of our studio classes: choose from HipHop, Khai Bo, Bodypump and many more. This prize is worth approximately £35!

Conditions: Use of any of our facilities is subject to our terms and conditions and at the user’s own risk. An appointment must be made for the session. Prize must be claimed within four weeks of notification. It is not exchangeable for cash and is not transferable to any other party. Dave’s Gym: Tel: 029 2046 0232 E.mail: enquiries@daves-gym. co.uk Web: www.daves-gym.co.uk

NAME....

EMAIL....

How to enter: Simply complete the crossword opposite and drop it into the crossword competition box outside the gair rhydd office on the 4th floor of the Students’ Union. The first correct entrant to be plucked from the box every week will win the Dave’s Gym package.

42 gairrhydd

MAY.19.2008

GRAB!

COMPETITIONS@gairrhydd.COM

WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN!

Free Tickets to the Hay Festival 2008!

E

scape Into The Park is nationally recognised as being the biggest event in the Welsh clubbing calendar, attracting over 20,000 dance music fans to Swansea’s beautiful Singleton Park on Saturday June 14. Last year Escape Into The Park was another phenomenal, sold-out success where a selection of DJ demi-gods from all over the world turned the all-day festival into the country’s ultimate hot ticket.

The 11 hour dance marathon which starts at midday takes place across four arenas and a main outdoor stage, each of which are rigged with almighty sound systems and world class production.

This year, accomplished electronic music veterans Underworld will headline the main stage for one of their always storming live performances.

The British electronic music duo of Karl Hyde and Welshman Rick Smith have toured every corner of the globe and their seminal classic records such as Born Slippy and Dark & Long have been staple ingredients in every DJ’s record collection! Other DJs feature Tidy Boys, Lisa Lashes and Andy C. The VIP Arena will be hosted by glam house brand Hed Kandi for those who like their blissed-out sexy, soulful house sounds. They will be transforming the VIP room into a luxurious playpen with Hed Kandi décor and live percussion alongside their fine residents!

Tickets are £41.50 for this event; however, we have five pairs of tickets to give away for free! All you have to do is answer the question below and send your name and address to the email above: Fedde Le Grand will also be appearing at Escape into the Park, what dance tune is he famous for? a) Gimme More b) Put Your Hands Up For Detroit c) Glamorous

B

anco Santander, one of the largest banks in the world, created ‘Santander Universities’ in 1996 to support higher education across the world. The scheme now encompasses over 600 universities in Europe and the Americas.

For the very first time, 200 students from across the UK and Europe are invited to become Santander-Abbey ‘Scholars’ at The Hay Festival in Wales. The Festival, in its 21st year, is a carnival celebration of literature, food, comedy, debate, world music and performance. It brings over 130,000 people to Hay to experience the very best in modern culture.

Each ‘Scholar’ will receive five free tickets to the Hay Festival 2008 events which are running between May 22 and June 1. They will also be able to access The Hay Student Blog where photos and experiences can be documented and broadcast to the world.

To apply call 0870 990 1290 and quote: SANTANDER UNIVERSITIES For more information visit: http://www.hayfestival.com/wales/ students.aspx

WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN!

gairrhydd

MAY.19.2008

43

SPORT

SPORT@gairrhydd.COM

Charlie Woollcombe-Adams Rugby Reporter

Engin ...................................... 24 CARBS ...................................... 5 ENGIN CLINCHED the IMG Rugby Cup with an emphatic victory over a battling CARBS side.

The Tyn-y-Wern pitches played host to an intense game of rugby between two highly renowned IMG teams.

Missing their captain Karl de Gelas, ENGIN had a shaky and somewhat uninspired start. It was not long before the dangerous pace of CARBS’ backs began to threaten ENGIN in their lethargic state and they broke through to record an early try.

Staring to warm up, ENGIN showed their superiority rucking despite the apparent weight disadvantage. This allowed Richard Andrews to supply to his backs in style. Receiving the ball after some good play, winger Jonny Evans slipped behind the enemy’s line and ran beneath the posts to score ENGIN’s first try of the game. The mesmerising boot of Aki Davies duly converted.

The referee was professional and fair, quickly bringing some CARBS Neil Fairbrother Snooker Reporter Snooker Club ........................... 17 Pool Club .................................. 5 THE SNOOKER Club trounced the Pool Club in an exciting grudge match earlier this month.

The clubs were battling to determine who would be crowned Cardiff Cuesport champions.

Taking place at Rileys, City Road, the event comprised of fifteen snooker games and fifteen of pool. Each club fielded a team of 10.

players into order after some risky challenges. The CARBS defence responded to Engin’s period of attacking play by pushing their defence up. However, Harri Phillips thought quickly and chipped the ball over the advancing wall, scoring Engin’s second converted try in spectacular fashion.

It became apparent that CARBS were competing well in line outs as well as in the backs. Having been untouchable throughout the season, the technical qualities of ENGIN players Sam Jeffries, Tom McLintock and James Lander were being defeated by CARBS’ high flyers.

By the time half-time arrived the tally of injuries had risen after some strong challenges over the course of the game.

The ENGIN team continued their onslaught in the second half. Jack Bruce and Ollie Yaroshevych valiantly made them some ground with their straight angles of running.

And doing what he does best, James Chisholm crashed through to score a well-deserved third try for ENGIN. The relentless spirit and drive of ENGIN had grinded CARBS down, but some vengeful runs and stunning kicks from the CARBS fullback kept them afloat.

However, one such kick entered the

The Snooker Club took an early 7-3 lead in the singles snooker matches through Ben Davies, Dave Blake, Rupert Taylor, Dan Peacey, Neil Fairbrother, Dom Osborne and Dave Trebilcock. Andy Holman, Shaun Hill and Alun Edwards returned victories for the Pool team.

In the snooker doubles, the Snooker Club whitewashed the Pool Club 5-0. Wins from the pairings of Dave Blake/Dan Peacey, Jon Hillard/Richard Jones, Neil Fairbrother/James Channon, Dominic Osborne/Dave Trebilcock and Ben Davies/Rupert Taylor gave the Snooker Club a 12-3 half-time lead.

The Pool Club looked to hit back

PHOTO: CHARLIE WOOLCOMBE-ADAMS

ENGIN EAT THEIR CARBS

ENGINEERS: Nice nipples

safe hands of Dan Jones who challenged the full back with a mightier hoof. After a textbook run down from Jonny Evans, and a well organised overlap, James Beltrami glided over the try line. This was the final nail in the coffin for CARBS, and ENGIN secured a convincing 24 – 5 victory. in the 9 Ball singles, their favoured sport, but Taylor, Blake and Channon claimed impressive victories for Snooker. Holman scored the only win for Pool. The results left Snooker requiring one more point to win the match outright.

Snooker did far more than that.

In the 9-Ball doubles, the pairings of Hillard/Osborne and Fairbrother/ Jones pushed Snooker further ahead.

Shaun Hill and Mike Lloyd pulled one back for Pool but by now Snooker had cemented a 17-5 win with 8-Ball pool singles and doubles still to play.

Pool Club will be hoping to revenge the defeat when the teams meet again next year.

IMG Rugby Union league was unfortunately abolished this year. However, the players of the eight IMG teams have continued to pursue the sport that they love without the competition.

Their enthusiasm was rewarded with an end of season tournament in which the talent of the IMG players was on

show for all to see.

Praise must be given to all the captains and their committee members, whose perseverance has ensured a superb season, the survival of IMG Rugby Union, and hopefully many more superb seasons to come.

OLIVER BENNET’S GUIDE TO ALL THINGS SAILING

Simply apooling

SAILING: Nice ripples

Team Racing

SNOOKER: Cued up

The majority of university competitions are team racing events.

In this format, each team competes with 3 dinghies which have 2 sailors onboard.

For a team to win they must finish with the least number of points in the competition. Points are attributed in accordance with the place a boat finishes in. For example, if a team finishes with one first placed boat but two boats in the lower order they could still finish last, depending on how low down the other boats actually are.

A great deal of tactics are involved in ‘taking out’ (effectively slowing down) the opposition boats in order for your own team to sail through unhindered.

As a result, races are fast and often tense with positions changing a great deal.

Fleet Racing Fleet racing is the more prevalent form of racing in sailing competitions.

Each boat competes individually and as a result fleet races tend to be longer.

Match Racing Universities also compete in match racing as well as fleet racing. This consists of one-on-one sailing with only two boats on the course. This format involves keelboats and tends to feature larger crews.