Quench - Issue 81

BOUTIQUE

BOOTY

Digging for hidden treasures in Cardiff

SWEET

NOSTALGIA The candy time forgot

FILMS

OF THE

YEAR

ATP:

We tak through e you

big mus Butlins's ic festiv al

: s t n e t n o c Issue 81 // 19 May - 2 June

R AT THE STUDENT MAGAZINE OF THE YEA ARDS! AW IA MED T DEN STU AN RDI 2008 GUA

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Absolutely mindblowing...

Going Out p.36

VOYEUR RANT HUW FEATURES GAY INTERVIEWS FOOD TRAVEL FASHION BLIND DATE BOOKS DIGITAL

DON'T MISS THE NEXT ISSUE! Quench adopts an exciting new format

ARTS GOING OUT MUSIC FILM

04 06 07 08 10 12 16 19 22 25 26 31 35 36 41 49

COVER DESIGN: BEN BRYANT

Editor Hazel Plush Executive Editor Ben Bryant Deputy Editor Simon Lucey Assistant to the Editors Elaine Morgan Sub-Editors Francesca Jarvis, Sim Eckstein, Guy Ferneyhough Arts Kate Budd, Lisa Evans Blind Date Emma Chapman, Sarah George Books Aisling Tempany Digital Tom Baker Fashion Meme Sgroi, Nicole Briggs Features Ellie Woodward, Louise Cook Film Adam Woodward, Francesca Jarvis, Sim Eckstein Food Jenny Edwards, Jen Entecott Gay James Moore Going Out Alex Gwilliam, Kirstin Knight Huw Huw Davies Interviews Ben Marshall, Leah Eynon Music Guy Ferneyhough, Kyle Ellison, Phil Guy The Rant Andy Swidenbank Travel Andy Tweddle, Simon Lucey Creative Consultant Lowri Howells Head of Photography Natalia Popova Proof Readers Elaine Morgan, Neil Fairbrother

printed on recycled paper. PLEASE RECYCLE.

voyeur

......................

I

am alone in my state of misery drowning in a sea of happiness.

I am surrounded by stereotypical student debauchery and postexam mayhem. However I cannot partake in this, because I am still subject to the stress of being assessed.

The constant 4-in-the-morning wake up calls, chanting 'have you finished, have you finished, have you fuck' followed by sliding over the cheesy chips 'n' gravy that has been evenly dispersed over the living room has caused me to become a bitter husk of the man I once was.

I soon realised that a large proportion of the student body must feel my pain, and being the good natured, procrastinating person I am I felt I should help, with a trip to Staples.

Whilst wandering the aisles my mood lightened realising what an untapped resource this stationary market could prove to be and spent the rest of the afternoon devising my top few things to do in Staples.

So here it is my top Staples activities for all those still stuck in revision hell.

1. Staple fight duels. Choose your weapons. Walk. Turn. Shoot. Chaos.

2. Racing. Design your circuit, choose your office chair, get set go.

3. Create your very own origami army from the endless print paper.

4. Go to the cashier and ask to be shown to the paperclips. Let them show you and then repeat every two minutes for the hour.

5. Each member of your party should climb on top of their chosen display and pretend to drive a spaceship. Savour the looks you get, especially if you make a good space ship noise.

6. Open a tin of paint and proceed to give the store a fresh look.

This list of activities is sure to lift you out of revision hell, indeed all those who are finished will soon be jealous that they haven't got an excuse for a quick Staples trip. SL

04 / voyeur@gairrhydd.com

IN

OUT

{

Gingerbread men

Gingerbread foetus

say what

?!

What a douchebaguette...

A female douchebag. A woman who exhibits the characteristics of a douchebag.

e-shopper

embracing consumerist filth

Jesus action figure www.kitschulike.com $24.99 This deluxe jesus action figure set feeds 5,000 with 5 loaves, 2 fish and glow in the dark hands.|

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......

I always regarded Walkabout as a cattle market for horny, spotty-faced freshers who would not be able to handle a woman as voluptuous and, dare I say, experienced as myself. However being the university socialite that I am I have unintentionally befriended one of these poor little freshers, and on one recent Thursday they convinced me to indulge myself in their immature behaviour.

And I loved it. There really is nothing like a bit of fresh talent. Being amazingly popular I have exhausted most of the watering holes a girl like me would like to be seen at. However superficial I am not and I would recommend this venue to anybody that fancies a bit of fresh meat to sink their teeth into.

“

{Voyeur }

voyeur

gold Fat Kid

your worst nightmare

rapper

Eminem successfully rejected the stereotype that only black people can succeed in rap, but this shows it may be an exception. Cringe.

lucky man

Claiming to be the luckiest man on earth? You're animated mate. Chin up.

voyeur@gairrhydd.com / 05

the rant

The Rant

This we Sarah Ge ek, o slates so rge Welsh C me elebs.

National Displeasures

06 /rant@gairrhydd.com

the perma-tanned beefcake, and they’re far from complimentary.

Another Welsh star to fall in my firing line is Catherine Zeta Jones.

If reports are to be believed, and some are very close to home, CZJ is an egotistical diva who expects the world to kiss the ground she walks on and, unsurprisingly, she always has been. OK, she's not a bad actress and she is ridiculously attractive, but has anyone ever noticed her irritating Welsh/ American accent?

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You’re certainly no small-town Welsh girl any more, Zeta-Jones!

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I

t’s a fact: most Welsh people are patriotic beyond belief and rejoice in anything that showcases this pocket rocket of a country.

However, it has become a recurring trend that any Welsh celeb who begins to gain recognition as an A-Lister will play on their Welsh roots and make a pledge to stay true to their country. Well it has come to my attention (as I’m sure it has to many other born and bred Welshies) that a lot of the celebs who do just this are far from the national treasure they claim to be and are more of an embarrassment to their country.

Take Charlotte Church for example - the girl who ‘put Cardiff on the map’. I would have been happy to associate her with Wales ten years ago, when she sprang onto the scene as an angelicoperatic child prodigy. Yet her days as a chain-smoking, vodka-swilling, foul-mouthed madam with a penchant for picking up bad boys were cringe-worthy beyond belief.

Most people applauded her for her frank attitude and her claim that she was just living how a nineteen year old should be. But were the Welsh actually proud to have such a person fronting their country?

Even when her TV show aired, she played on her Welsh identity, suddenly adopting a strong Cardiff accent and a new Welsh rugby player on her arm! Gavin Henson was dubbed the one to calm Charlotte’s wild ways and in many ways he did; it’s a rare occasion to see the songstress out on St. Mary’s street nowadays. However, it seems he has taken over from her egotistical exploits, with reports emerging nearly every weekend, detailing the Welsh kicker’s bad behaviour. And yet still he retains his title as a much-loved Welsh rugby player... I can think of a few more appropriate titles suited to

For someone who probably hasn’t set a foot in Wales since she hit the big time, I think it’s about time to drop the Swansea twang – you’re certainly no smalltown Welsh girl any more, ZetaJones!

Another similar case to that of Mrs. Douglas is fellow Jones: Tom. Yes, sorry to burst your bubble boys and girls, but the King of pop is not the humble valley boy he still claims to be, as reports from his very own family members have suggested. If any of you watched his appearance on the Sunday Night Project fairly recently, I’m sure you will agree that Tombo does not exude the same modest Welsh demeanour that he once possessed. Yet, I’ll give him his due, he can still belt out some cracking tunes and ‘Sex Bomb’ remains a firm favourite on dance floors across Wales.

Moreover, TV has done nothing to aid the Welsh stereotype.

Don’t get me wrong, ‘Gavin and Stacey’ gets me through my days, but I can’t help but look on ashamedly at the portrayals of the Welsh as frankly dull characters, no matter how loveable, with a narrow command of the English language. Moreover, ‘Big Brother’ has caused further Welsh shame.

As much as I loved gormless Glyn Wise (and his presence here at Cardiff means I have to be nice), Helen ‘I love blinking I do’ Adams, and too-nice-for-her-own-good Rachel Rice, we have been labelled as pretty limited specimens.

Well, get rid of this notion once and for all, because we sure ain’t all like them!

You can probably tell it’s beginning to grate on me. Sometimes the wrong Welsh stars are picked to be the spokespeople for our country and it’s downright annoying. So, do the right thing and remove any preconceptions of Welsh celebrity you have in your warped minds. Katherine Jenkins, Duffy, Michael Sheen and the yummy Steve Jones are more catered towards what the Welsh would like to associate with their national identity. So you’ve been told... be kind in future, no matter how anti-Welsh you claim to be, because the prejudices you possess may be more to do with yourself and the stereotypes you choose to believe, than actually is the case. So there!

h T

huw

? uw

he thinks stuff

he world has spun relentlessly on and it's reached the time when some of us have to get a job. Bollocks.

It's all too tempting to barricade myself in the womb of higher education; to cling on to the comforting teat of a student loan; to stretch the desperate metaphor of childlike dependence one image too far. Keep taking courses = keep getting loans = live for free, forever. And what a talking point at parties. A PhD? Oh, that old thing. A Masters? Well, I don't like to brag. A Diploma in Critical Thinking? Yeah, I'm not sure about that one either, to be honest.

Unfortunately, some tiresome government jobsworth would eventually notice forms relating to a 46-year-old taking his 13th degree, having paid back none of his student loan. Full-time education for the rest of my life, then, isn't an option. Again, bollocks.

The thing is, graduate career paths don't really appeal to me. I want a bit more excitement in my life, and a lot less actual work.

It'd be ace if I could get paid for writing this shit, but job prospects in opinion journalism right now are about as healthy as an obese Mexican pig farmer lying in anthrax, injecting himself with the rage virus.

See, stand-up comedy is out as well. Is swine flu still happening, even? There's some delay between me writing this and you reading it, so it's quite possible swine flu has either disappeared into historical obscurity or KILLED ABSOLUTELY EVERYBODY. Anyway, I've thought of a few alternative means of employment, to avoid the drudgery of real work. For one, I am definitely

going to apply to be on The Apprentice. Even my CV admits I'm rubbish at pretty much everything, but if this year's lot are anything to go by, that shouldn't matter. They're fucking idiots.

As long as I don't burn down an orphanage, shoot Nelson Mandela and defecate on his remains in full view of the press and a bus full of choirboys, I should walk right into that job with Alan Sugar.

job prospects right now are about as healthy as an obese Mexican pig farmer lying in anthrax It's probably worth having a stab at Britain's Got Talent as well. Susan Boyle hit the big time, and as the tabloid press pointed out again and again, to the point of making you wonder if they like her at all, she's not exactly a looker. The point is, of course, that it doesn't matter because she can sing.

But has anyone actually heard her sing? Oh, 79 billion people watched her performance of Les Miserables' I Dreamed A Dream on YouTube, but they only heard an audience going absolutely mental.

All you can hear her sing is the first line. So if I can go on one of these shows and totally nail that first line, the rest of the song will be drowned out and no one will ever know what I actually sound like. Fame awaits.

I have a few careers in mind that will keep me away from boring office work, apart from casting to be the British stereotype on Neighbours ("Cor blimey, guv'nor!").

There are so many possibilities.

Armchair tester. Deep-sea astronaut. Jeremy Clarkson impersonator. Look – someone, somewhere, will want one. And in the words of several hundred drunk people screaming along to the Baywatch theme in a soul-destroying club with an ill-advised 'beach party' theme: I'll be ready.

One lure is to become a recurrent sperm donor: not for the welldocumented job satisfaction, but because I'm so impressed by the ad campaign I feel I should oblige.

The slogan behind the drive for more sperm donors? 'Give a toss'.

Brilliant. It probably says something about me that I find this more persuasive than the idea of masturbating over titties for a living, but hey, I'm a sucker for a good pun.

I quite like the idea, too, of being Jade Goody's agent. If her agent still gets 10% of the money from every bit of publicity, that's a job I bloody want. The words 'set for life' spring to mind: Goody's getting more out of her death than 2-Pac and Eva Cassidy put together (which would be one hell of a collaboration).

In conclusion, my next column's also my last, so I'm going to write it on whatever you want. Send your suggestions to opinion@gairrhydd. com (let's be honest, huw@gairrhydd.com doesn't actually exist).

One thing: no job offers. Please.

huw@gairrhydd.com / 07

features

Just Good Fr How many times have we scoffed at a guy and a girl who claim to be best friends? Is it possible for this to be true? Ellie Woodward questions whether platonic friendship is ever possible...

through both the drunken conversations and the loudly vocalised discussions about fellatio and the failings of the opposite sex in the middle of coffee shops: men are useless and women are evil. I questioned how on earth I could place myself between these two extremes.

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The question is; why do we put ourselves through this torture?

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The thing about guy friends is that they’re straightforward. Take an affair of the heart to a woman and it will – without exception – be analysed, cried over, questioned, sympathised with, analysed some more until you may as well have paid a psychiatrist and settled down on a leather couch for a few hours. The thing with women is that we like to analyse things. We convince ourselves of things even when there’s nothing there. A guy ignores your phone call. ‘It must mean he likes you!’ a well-meaning female friend will exclaim.

Take the same problem to a guy and you’ll be met with the truth: ‘He has no interest in you.’ Guys don’t sweat the small stuff – they don’t spend hours pondering their

08/quenchfeatures@gairrhydd.com

singledom, so busy hypothesising that they fail to notice any suitable partner who may come their way.

They don’t panic when a girlfriend who ordinarily texts them seven times a day only texts them six and jump to the conclusion that they’re sleeping with someone else. Above all, they’re honest.

They’ll tell you that your statement dress looks ridiculous, they’ll formulate opinions about your latest beau (and they’re usually right) and they’ll tell you to your face instead of behind your back.

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W

hat is it about the phrase, ‘we’re just good friends’ that invites a universally raised eyebrow? It seems that when it comes to males and females, the only way that a pair can be ‘friends’ is if this is suffixed with ‘with benefits.’

Perhaps it’s an evolutionary thing – you know, ‘Me man, you woman, we shag.’ The need to reproduce is arguably deeply embedded in our DNA meaning that males and females can’t fail to find the opposite sex anything other than attractive. The ‘Just Good Friends’ theory appears to have been tried and tested hundreds of times and has resulted in the same conclusion: men and women just can’t do it. Hell, even the producers of Friends didn’t believe it, with four out of the six coffee-lovers pairing off by the time the series ended.

It’s a shame though – surely the human race is more advanced than chest-banging cavemen?

After years of feeling let down and betrayed by female friends, I decided to abandon Oestrogen in favour of male friends. I was fed up of the Girls’ Nights Out which inevitably ended with someone crying during a group trip to the toilets about a boyfriend/potential boyfriend/the girl that kissed the potential boyfriend/the boyfriend’s ex girlfriend. There seemed to be one general theme running

“

w

I fell for my best friend

For a while I spent so much time immersed in testosterone that I was surprised I hadn’t transformed into a man: the extent of my female company was an overindulgence in all things pink and sparkly, a bubble bath and an episode of Sex and The City. Now, however, I have cultivated a few female friends without whom I’d be lost, but my male friends will always offer me a very different, very important perspective on life.

Having said all this, I fell victim to the failing of the Just Good Friends theory when I fell for my best – male – friend. Throughout our friendship, people frequently

features

riends? less.

Ultimately, it was hasty and naive of me to enter into a relationship with my BFFL but I never expected it to end the way it did and I never considered the possibility that our friendship may

“

It is possible to have a platonic best friend.

Shop, drink, watch football all you want, just make sure you miss out the sex acts.

“

implemented the raised eyebrow expression when I informed them that I had no feelings and we would never end up together.

In part, this was the truth. We spent many hours reclining on our favourite leather sofa in our favourite bar, with a bottle of red wine, discussing the woes of our love lives. It was only when we had split up with and got over our respective exes that the sexual tension was sizzling and I began to see him in a completely different light. After a few flirtatious text messages back and forth, I invited him to Cardiff where we spent a few very friendly hours together and the rest, as they say, is history. It would seem that in the space of a few hours I had confirmed the cynical hypothesis that men and women can never be Just Good Friends.

Except, then the relationship ended. And the break up wasn’t mutual. In fact, the relationship dissolution was doubly hard because not only had I lost my boyfriend, but I’d lost my best friend in the process. In the aftermath of the split I sometimes just wanted to talk to him – to tell him about my day, or send him a late night text like I used to. The unwritten break up rules which dictate that contacting an ex is a cardinal sin in the break up process, meant that I kept my distance but longed for our friendship nonethe-

be irreversibly destroyed in the process.

And it’s not just me who has hd a fateful encounter with a best friend. Take two people I know.

They were best friends, she had a major crush on him, he took advantage. They got together, then they broke up and it’ll never be the same. Another friend answered her phone on Friday night to face an onslaught of drunken procla-

mations from her guy friend about how desperately in love he was with her. He texted her the next day and told her that he was so embarrassed, so in love with her, that he could never speak to her again. The good thing about platonic best friends is that they offer you the best parts of a relationship whilst leaving out all the breakup inducing stuff: a platonic guy friend will shop with you, talk to you about your problems but leave out the obsession with football.

A platonic girl friend will offer you truthful advice about other women without descending to a jealous rage. However, once the platonic friends cross the line – be it through a drunken phonecall or something more physical– everything is destroyed. A combination of female flirtation, male arousal, unspecified quantities of alcohol and deep regret the next morning ensures that there is no platonic friendship to speak of.

It is possible to have a platonic best friend – just so long as you know the boundaries. Shop, drink, watch football all you want, just miss out the sex acts. The platonic friends who end up together for years, get married and have children – maybe they never were just good friends. Those who wake up in the morning in a fog of confusion and embarrassment and run for the hills...well, maybe they were.

quenchfeatures@gairrhydd.com / 09

NO BLEEDING GAYS The National Blood Service says clear evidence shows gay men have a greater chance of passing on HIV and other infections in donated blood. However, campaigners say there are fewer restrictions on heterosexuals who have high-risk sex. James Moore weighs up both sides of the debate and asks: 'Is The Blood Ban Homophobic?'

10 //gay@gairrhydd.com gay@gairrhydd.com 30

FOR THE BLOOD BAN a blood service that is as risk free as possible’. The ban may seem to be nothing more than a blunt piece of homophobic legislation, but maybe there is a point to it after all. It is a slightly inconvenient fact that gay men are statistically far more likely to be exposed to HIV, even though the infection is by no means a gay-only disease.

The NBS also put restrictions on intravenous drug users, or hetero-

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The ban is the best way of maintaining a risk-free blood service

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I

n 2001, Mike Fogden, the chairman of the National Blood Service, made national news for openly accusing a gay man of being ‘evil’ for giving blood without informing the service of his homosexuality.

He justified this statement by suggesting that the gay man was prepared to put the ‘innocent life of an innocent patient at risk’ because of his secrecy.

Naturally, the controversial branding of a gay man as ‘evil’ led to thousands of complaints to the NBS, who did issue an apology to the Terrence Higgins Trust for any offence caused.

But rather ironically, the Terrence Higgins Trust, a leading charity for gay rights and safe sex practice strongly support the ban on gay men giving blood.

So why do they support it, even though they are unquestionably not homophobic? The Terrence Higgins Trust stated in Attitude Magazine that they believe ‘the ban is the best way of maintaining

sexuals who admit "risky" sexual practices involving prostitutes for the same reason. The ban isn’t just an attack on gays. It is a pragmatic approach, ensuring that the blood service operates with as few complications as possible.

gay And now for another inconvenient fact. Based on the best available data, The Terrence Higgins Trust also informed Attitude magazine that it has been suggested that lifting the blood ban fully would increase the risk of HIV entering blood stocks by 500 per cent. But of course, not all gay men have AIDs or HIV or any other sexually transmitted diseases. So why don’t they just test all the blood, as surely the Blood Service are missing out on a huge quantity of clean, uninfected blood by keeping the ban in place?

Currently, blood donated in the UK is screened for a number of bloodborne viruses, including HIV and Hepatitis C. However, if the donor has been newly-infected with these viruses, there is a "window" in which the tests do not work. To reduce the risk of contamination, the National Blood Service does not allow sexually active gay men to give blood.

Development of more effective screening technology could lead to the lifting of the ban.

AGAINST THE BLOOD BAN record as stating that the risk of patients dying because of insufficient blood quantity is far greater than the risk of HIV contaminated blood getting into the blood serv-

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3 million healthy gay men are turned away because of the ban

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M

any gay people would love the opportunity to save a life through the simple process of giving blood.

But the current ban states that if a man has ever, ever had sex with another man, the NHS considers his blood to be contaminated for life. The current ban on gay men is built on a foundation of inconsistency.

For instance, the other groups that are at risk of HIV infection and therefore excluded from the blood donation system are only banned from giving blood for 12 months. Safety has to be the Blood Service's first priority but why is it one rule for certain people at risk, and a completely separate rule for gay men?

Some doctors have gone on

ice. It is suggested that the blood of some 3 million healthy gay men is turned away because of the ban. That’s the entire population of Wales, unable to give blood because of a small

minority of those who may be infected.

It is true that any gay man who has unprotected sex is seven times more likely to contract HIV then a straight man. But there are also recent statistics to suggest that the gay population is far more safety conscious when it comes to sexual practices then heterosexuals. A 2008 sex survey suggested that the leading method of contraception among heterosexuals is the birth control pill, without doubling up and using a condom. The pill reduces the risk of pregnancy but does nothing to protect against any viruses that may corrupt the blood. In light of this evidence, you can’t help but ask if heterosexuals are really at less risk then gay men.

gay@gairrhydd.com / 11

interviews

The Maccabees Having already dominated indie disco dancefloors across the country with their hit laden debut LP, Colour It In, The Maccabees are set to once more take the charts by storm with their sophomore effort, Wall of Arms. Prior to their sold out gig in Solus, frontman Orlando Weeks spoke to Ben Marshall about his art, not being influenced by Paris, and not being hungover.

I

t is an ignominious start to my interview with the Orlando Weeks of the Maccabees; arriving as I do, bleary-eyed and unshaven. It was perhaps an unfortunate time for the Maccabees to play Cardiff, the day after I handed in my essays (it’s almost as if they didn’t even care!), yet despite my pale and shaking form, Orlando, resplendent in a shirt that only sought to exacerbate my hangover, was disarmingly warm and welcoming. First things first, then, How is the tour going?

"I’m actually enjoying it a lot more than the last tour. I’m figuring out a routine after gigs, and I’m not wast-

ing time anymore. I’m slowly getting my head round what Joel does at the sound desk, so I can be more involved with that next time. I’m definitely being more productive as opposed to waking up feeling as how I imagine you do."

Ha bloody ha. The band are currently enjoying an unprecedented level of interest in their work. Having exploded onto the indiesphere with their debut effort, Colour It In, the band now have the weight of expectation on their shoulders. Indeed, the press seem almost unnaturally focussed on their decision to up sticks and record in Paris. Orlando is quick to nix any suggestions of pretention

12 / interviews@gairrhydd.com

and influence over the band’s sound, however: “It’s a classic example of a band not being storyworthy enough.

We don’t really conjure enough dirt to be that interesting, so it’s just something for people to talk about.

The only influence it had, if any, was that it gave us isolation from friends and family. We were able to get away from spats with mates and focus on the record.’

And focus, they did. The new album has been warmly received in all quarters with particular focus being levelled at their supposed darker and more expansive sound, ‘If anything, the producer reined us in a bit. We wanted to see the

interviews

career would be enough for most young, thrusting indie musicians, but not for Orlando Weeks. He also has a strong interest in art,

“

I was always pretty good at English. I think my teacher fancied me but I was a bit too young

“

album as a record as opposed to live songs that we’ve recorded. Like, sometimes we’d want to try using something like a delayed glockenspiel as opposed to a guitar, but he’d show us how to emulate it with pedals instead. He was very aware of the band that we are, as opposed to what we’re not. He got us focussing on what we could as opposed to should.’

Orlando was also quick to address any comments about the supposed lyrical darkness that has been attached to the album, ‘If anything, lyrically, the first album was a lot more forlorn. The sound of it is grander, so it’s easier to say it’s darker. I’d like to think of it as a bit more optimistic than the first one.’

A fruitful and burgeoning musical

which is reflected in his passionate discussion of his interests outside of the band, so would you say that

art has influenced you as well as music?

"Absolutely. I see it as a nice escape from band stuff. I studied to be an illustrator, when I was a student. Yeah when I was younger I was much more into art than music.

I was never listening to it in anything more than a passive way. I just let it wash over me, you know?

It’s a much quicker turnaround with art. I just bought a book on Andy Goldsworthy; he's an artist I really like, and his whole angle is putting himself into nature. He did this one piece where he went into a quarry and lay down all splayed out. He then waited until it rained, then got up and photographed the silhouette. He just does these smart little observations. It's very unpretentious and beautiful."

interviews@gairrhydd.com /13

interviews

BADDIES

14 / interviews@gairrhydd.com

interviews

TWISTED, BASS-DRIVEN

POP COURTESY OF A SOUTHEND FOUR-PIECE

WITH FULL-TIME CALL-CENTRE JOBS

AND AN UNNERVING PENCHANT FOR ROADKILL After releasing their debut single, Battleships, in October of last year, up next for Baddies is their second single, Holler For My Holiday which will be released in June this year and following on from that, their debut album, which Mike describes as “an

“

wearing uniforms is a way to say hey, this is us, this is what we do and we are here to do a job

“

B

addies formed just over two years ago with identical twins Michael and Jim Webster joined by Simon Bellamy and Danny Rowton. Hailing from Southend, in the wake of acts as varied as the Horrors, These New Puritans, Scroobius Pip and Get Cape. Wear Cape. Fly. However they akin their sound more to “Talking Heads + Queens of the Stone Age + being from Britain and all that that entails”.

When on stage they favour matching blue suits which is a way for the guys to show that they are a gang.

Mike says “wearing uniforms is a way to say, hey this is us, this is what we do and that we are here to do a job”is to which Alexander McQueen, the self-styled "hooligan of English fashion", is apparently a huge fan and is desperate to dress them.

Their music is hard, full of muscular riffs and meaty choruses, delivered energetically and with determination to encourge their audience to work up a sweat, seemingly at odds with their position as the high fashionistas of the new Britpop batallion.

insight into 'the struggle' of getting to where we are now”. The album is their autobiography, a collection of songs that tell the tales of the everyday and then dumping them on their heads and laughing at them in a sort of You’ve-been-Framed kind of way. It's this level of honesty

that has lead them to be picked as some of the acts to watch in 2009, by publications such as NME and the Guardian. Although only selling 500 7” singles do date so far, their live shows have been impressive enough to sell out venues in Paris, Amsterdam and Barcelona.

The band find themselves inspired at the the strangest of opportunities.

Mike regales us with a tale of driving to work finding a “dead fox in the road; his belly up, tongue hanging out and his teeth everywhere” and still finding inspiration to write. It is this perculiarly skewed sense of being able to find subject matter in the most grim and bleak areas, that separate Baddies from their contemporaries.

However, it's easy to understand what makes these young firebrands seek the bleakest of lyrical matter in their work. They all currently work in a Call Centre, working a menial job, 40 hours a week in order to make ends meet while the band gathers momentum, that said, if their early singles are anthing to go by, it may time to hang up those headsets.

INSERT COIN interviews@gairrhydd.com /15

food

“

As the recession bites, people are turning towards tastes that remind them of better times

“

16 /food@gairrhydd.com

food

Sweet Nostalgia In search of a little light relief, Hayley Pyper reminisces over the days when an opal fruit was an opal fruit and the disappearance of the Wispa bar was still only the stuff of nightmares. . .

T

here comes a time in everyone’s life, probably around exam time, when they wish they could just turn back the clocks to a less stressful and happier time. With the economy going down the pan quicker than a student loan, the time for comfort eating from the good old days is here. In the midst of the ever-worsening recession, foods from yester-year have been making a comeback on to the nation’s shopping lists.

As recession bites, people are turning towards tastes from the past that remind them of better times.

This misty-eyed culinary trend has sparked the reappearance of a range of old time favourites like Birds Eye’s Arctic Roll and the re-launch of the seventies old-style Monster Munch Pickled Onion crisps.

The first to jump on the reminiscing bandwagon were Cadbury, who gave into the ridiculous amounts of

Facebook pressure (you know you joined the group) and brought back the ʻWispaʼ bar after a five-year absence. Since then, the bar has made the company over £25 million in sales. I guess nostalgia never tasted so good.

In the economic meltdown madness, Starbursts are changing back to Opal Fruits and Snickers may be reverting back to Marathon bars.

No, I don’t remember them either.

Similarly for a limited time only, Wagon Wheels have premiered a new (read: old) caramel flavour circular snack that allow you to enjoy the authentic taste of the eighties without the staleness and risk of food poisoning.

The desire for retro extends beyond the realm of Dib ‘a Dabs, Refreshers and Tutti Fruttis. The British dinner tables are once again being filled with the old nʼ delicious favourites like Coq au Vin, Toad in the Hole and Macaroni Cheese.

These stodgy recession-busting dishes are becoming increasingly popular as people hunger for a time when everything was much more rosy. And why not? Decades past have given us the music and fashion that we a love (well some of it), so why not food? Forget sushi and paninis, there is nothing that a good Shephard’s Pie and Jam Roly Poly canʼt fix. They work miracles.

So let us celebrate in the bygone appeal of food and ride out this recession on a wave of trifle and victoria sponge. Whilst there are definitely ghosts of long-gone eras (namely Spam), these are thousands of fantastic traditional delicacies that are being resurrected from the recipe graveyards and eaten all around the country. Thereʼs just something reassuringly comforting about tucking into a scotch egg or some Angel Delight and in this time of exam frenzy, maybe this is just what we need.

Ye Olde Corner Shop ...the best sweets pocket money can buy Chomp bars

Vice Versas

Ice pops

Chomp bars, Tazos, Freddos and Fudge bars may have maintained their place on the sweetshop shelves but gone are the days you could get a chocolate fix for 10p.

Like minstrels but with the wow factor, dark shell - white inside, white shell - dark inside, dark shell . . .

What's better than an ice pop on a hot day? Well an ice pop with a Flintstones character on, obviously.

And none of that orange and lemon rubbish thank you, coca cola and bubblegum reigned supreme.

Rainbow tubes If anyone's stretched for a conspiracy theory they might want to find out what exactly they put in those sherbert tubes to turn them into a nationwide school-kid obsession.

Rocket Dips A lolly, sherbert, and a whole lot of crackling - what more could you ask for in a small bag?

Spaceraider crisps The Primark of the crisp world, 10p for a bag of crisps, they may have tasted vile, but who's complaing when they're shaped like alien heads?

Nerds It's what all the cool kids were eating and no wonder when they came in a handy carton that divided the flavours and everything. Imitation sweet 'dweebs' tried the bandwagon but they didn't quite have what it took.

food@gairrhydd.com / 17

travel

a i b ser

...without borders

Since Kosovo-gate in the '90s, Serbia has been reputed as a bit of a political brute. After splitting from Montenegro in 2006, however, Serbia has become a must-visit Eastern Europe destination. Here, Lindsay Foley shares her experience of Serbia...

D

isembarking after a twenty-hour train journey spent crammed into a compartment with five others, including a particularly strange Greek man with a penchant for midnight spam sandwiches, my first impressions of Belgrade weren’t overwhelmingly remarkable.

However, venturing out two hours later, having finally found our hostel (seemingly just somebody’s spare room) and after sampling some ferocious Serbian cherry brandy my perspective broadened somewhat.

The twentieth century saw Serbia controlled by Nazis, suffer a genocide under the fascist Ustase movement as well as culturally repressed by the authoritarianism of Milosevic, whose rule played host to the myriad of conflicts that ultimately resulted in the demise of Yugoslavia. The combination of Tito’s communism and devastatingly damaging post war planning in 1945 has left Serbia’s economy consistently fragile and although the dropping of the iron curtain in 1989 seemed to promise Serbs basic democratic rights, the authoritarian regime of Slobodan Milosevic during the subsequent decade did not adhere to these ideals in the slightest, instead creating a culture of ethnic tensions between Serbia and Bosnia, Croatia and Albania, culminating in the Kosovo crisis of 1999.

Despite NATO involvement, the situation was only resolved in 2000, when Milosevic

was forced out of government, and although the political situation has remained fraught, the last nine years being peppered with fractious periods, the establishment of The Republic of Serbia without Montenegro and Kosovo seems to have opened a fresh chapter in the

“

The people will make sure that you party hard in the true Serbian way

”

history of such a worn out nation.

The decades of conflict have left more than their mark on Belgrade.

On the surface the city seems bleak, but there is a raw and infectious energy that incessantly pervades the cratered buildings that remain as physical reminders of the friction that has shaped Serb life for as long as most can remember. The fallout has left Serbia without a tourist infrastructure, meaning that the museums and galleries of your average to-do list just don’t exist, creating the perfect excuse to indulge in the hedonistic vigour of Belgrade’s vociferous club scene that draws in crowds from across the Balkans, especially in the summer when the clubs and bars migrate to a multitude of boats and barges on the shore of the Danube, creating a completely unmatchable nightlife experience.

The continuously slow and delayed train system mirrors the relaxed Serbian attitude and so taking advantage of the slightly pricier yet much more efficient bus network is the best way to get out into the expanse of Serbian countryside. Heading northwards lies Novi Sad, a cosmopolitan city that exists around the imposing silhouette of the Petrovardin Fortress, built by eighteenth century Austrians as a defence against invading Turks, now offers visitors fantastic views across the Danube to the mountains beyond the city’s reach and is home to the massive EXIT Festival for four days every July.

If you want to escape civilisation, the rural wooded climbs of the south are infinitely beautiful and the serenity offers a stark contrast to the depressing industrial airs of towns such as Nis, through which you’ll need to pass to reach the rolling hills and mountains that are home to the medieval monasteries, notably those of Zica and Studenica, which are bursting with ancient frescoes that describe the colourful past of Serbia’s religious Orthodoxy better than any museum could.

Ultimately Serbia makes a perfect stop on any tour of eastern Europe; apart from having to register with local police in every town you visit, travel is simple and safe. The people are warm and welcoming, and will ensure that you party hard, in the true Serbian way.

travel@gairrhydd.com / 19

DUB travel

be good to me

Dublin is synonymous with drinking, partying and, less desirably, burning a gargantuan Euro-shaped hole in your pocket.

If you’re lucky enough to hit the Emerald Isle this summer, however, you can enjoy the dynamic capital broke or loaded.

Here, Andy Tweddle takes a look at Dublin, recommending the best ways to save and splurge.

T

his summer, travel abroad is basically obligatory. Some of us will be basking in the sweetness of a grant from the Financial Contingency Fund and, to an extent, money will be no object.

Those less fortunate will simply have to survive on a budget during their getaway. So what better place to visit than Dublin, one of Europe’s most exciting capitals, where a good time is guaranteed regardless of whether you’re bank balance is robust or just busted.

Getting to Dublin is a no brainer – Ryanair will pretty much guarantee an affordable flight over. While the opulent will have no problem shelling out the extra £20 to check large bags on to the flight, cheapies should try and fit all necessities into their carry-on luggage.

From experience, the plane staff tend to turn a blind eye to the fact that you might be carrying a backpack and a shoulder bag… and a plastic bag full of your loot on to the flight.

Accommodation is varied in Dublin, too. On a recent trip over

20 /travel@gairrhydd.com

for St. Patrick’s Day, Ashfield House offered me a very comfortable, affordable and central bed. The hostel is Dublin’s most centrally located budget accommodation and is situated right by the beautiful Trinity College and a mere five-minute walk from Temple Bar. Dorms here are a really cheap option, starting from about 20 Euros and, of course, provide an easy way to acquire a drinking buddy or two.

Even when splurging, the city is speckled with a vast array of hostels, most of which are more luxurious than vomit-inducing.

Those seeking a quiet night can book single and double rooms very easily for a little extra.

As with Rome and the Colosseum or Thailand and beaches, people visit Dublin to seek alcoholic refreshment, usually in the form of Guinness. Any trip to Dublin wouldn’t be complete without a trip to the Guinness Storehouse, entry to which will set you back around 14 Euros. The city is full of more affordable attractions to balance

your funds, though. Things like roaming the grounds of Dublin Castle, lying on the grass at Trinity College and visiting the various National Museums are all essential and all totally free.

When the Dublin Sun sets behind the River Liffey and the night calls, there is only one thing to do; answer. All roads lead to Temple Bar after dark and it is here where many pints of Guinness can be consumed and much traditional music sampled. Self-catering is pretty standard for those scrimping on the pennies but those eating out should hit up one of the city’s best kept secrets, contemporary restaurant Elephant and Castle.

travel

W

herever you deci de spend your mulla to h summer, Hostelwo this rld.com is a good way of ensuring a comfy bed.

Hostelworld.com online accommod is a massive at ing hub which no ion bookw hosts over 2 million customer re over 20,000 host views, listing els across 170 countries. Where ver you are planning on heading they are worth a look at.

The company ha a unique feature: s just launched M online community yWorld, an where travellers can create an ac co a myriad of differe unt and access nt ways to com-

Set in the thick of Temple Bar, Elephant and Castle is a reasonably priced Dublin institution offering undeniably the best chicken wings in the city.

Club-wise, Dublin offers something for everyone. Clubbers shouldn't find it a problem getting down in Dub whether they bask in the live-music at Whelan’s, pound to the heavy house at Sin or discover new meaning to the word 'gaelic' at gay-friendly George.

For the quick shop before your flight back to Blighty, head to

municate with ot he report home. Es r travellers and se a travel-Facebook, ntially a bit of users to map their MyWorld allows site, blog about wh journey on the been and hook-up ere they’ve ellers or friends with other travhe way as them. Vi aded the same de can also be uploa os and photos de mums back at ho d so frantic m and be rest assu e can log on red that you’re still alive.

Grafton Street. The bustling street is full of character and countless street performers, not to mention a blend of known high-street stores and distinctive boutiques.

While in Dublin, spend as you see fit. The beauty of the city is that just walking its vibrant streets one becomes awash with the Gaelic spirit that makes Dublin so brilliant. So in spite of whether you shell out or remain tight-fisted, you’re guaranteed to leave a craic addict.

travel@gairrhydd.com / 21

fashion

Eclectic Car Quench Fashion hits home turf and explores everything the city of street in Cardiff has to offer. We explore the markets, arcades, and the high ities! search of vintage garb, sparkly accessories and general fashion frivol

Aladdin's Arcades

I

f high street shopping isn’t exciting enough for you, delve into the weaving passages of Cardiff’s arcades, where you’ll find a treasure trove of goodies to make yourself shine!

High Street Arcade has an eclectic mix of vintage and boutique. Dip into Hobos for yummy, vintage, floral bandeau dresses.

Bejewelled offers a sparkly array of jewellery to tempt even the pickiest magpie. Lunacy, possibly my favourite boutique in Cardiff, has gorgeous formal dresses accompanied by jewellery in

Boutique

s for boy s

Topman For cutting edge fashion from one of the high street's favourite retailers, Topman is for those of you young men who like to make an impression. It has everything from casual tees to funky shirts so if you men are into the most recent fashion, this is the best place to go.

H&M This shop is great value for money, so if your student loan has

22 / fashion@gairrhydd.com

the shape of sweets. A flump bracelet adorns my wrist, but gummy bear necklaces, bourbon brooches, fried egg hair clips and jammy dodger pearls are also on display.

Castle arcade also deserves hours of browsing. For the men out there, Barker offers a good mix of brands, such as Super Dry and Diesel. Crystals has an ethereal glow to it, with amethyst, jade and opal stones embedded in sterling silver chains and rings.

To customize your own clothes, head to Clare Grove Buttons;

plastic ducks, Swarovski crystals, pencil sharpeners, wooden beads... you name it, this shop will have it in button form.

Finally, Morgan Arcade tempts shoppers in with international designers at Rouge Boutique, the brilliant sales of designer male clothing at Woodies Emporium and, for the beauty conscious, lotions and potions in Neil’s Yard.

As for the other 9 arcades... look out for fancy dress, 70s themes, joke shops and Goth.

Enjoy the exploration.

Anna Greenslade

slowly disappeared after a few too many nights out then I’d definitely recommend taking a trip here.

Who can go wrong at three tops for less than twenty quid?!

House of Fraser A little on the pricey side, but if you’re into your brands then this department store is the place to go in Cardiff.

River Island OK, so for casual wear, this retailer is chav heaven, but if you look past the neon vests and graffiti t-shirts, River Island actually do have a pretty damn good collection of formal wear. For smart trousers or shirts for a good price, this is the place to go, (especially if you’re preparing for this years summer ball!)

Barker Away from the centre of the main shops, this small urban store is hidden away in St Mary’s Street.

Barker offers men unique clothing that you will not find on the high street. For something you won’t see every other man in Cardiff wearing, this store is a great find!

Kirsty Dagnall

fashion

rdiff Collective

e

-

THIS LITTLE QUENCHIE

WENT TO MARKET

O

n a late sunny Sunday May afternoon I started out in search of a bargain.

My destination was the Milgi Lounge on City Road, home, once a month, to the Northcote Lane Market. As I entered Milgi’s there was little sign of the market but much of people kicking back and enjoying the Bank Holiday.

Maybe it was the sun or maybe it was the cocktail in my hand but it definitely felt like I was on holiday as I browsed the wares laid out on each table. It’s the sort of place you could expect to find anything; from jewellery that could have come straight off your grandma’s dressing table to handmade clutch bags in beautiful Cath Kidson style fabrics.

Anyone who has something to sell can have a stall (they just need to contact Milgi’s in advance). One that caught my eye was that of Welsh jewellery designers, Clutterfly. They produce unique and interesting pieces which already have a celebrity following, with Jaime Win-

HIDDEN TREASURES

P

ossibly the most inspiring for all things vintage and retro, Cardiff’s “Hobos 60s and 70s clothing” in the High Street Arcade is a quaint yet vibrant shop stocking everything from old torn levis denim minis, to the lively floral smock dresses and tunics that made the 70s.

Great for guys too, check out the worn lumberjack shirts and great tweed flat caps. Also a good range of accessories, vintage bags, belts, shoes and memorabilia from yesteryear.

Not technically a shop as such but

ston recently gushing! If you haven’t checked them out already, do it now! Natalie, of Clutterfly, told me, “The market is a fantastic place to showcase up and coming talent and also somewhere where you can get the most incredible vintage clothing at bargain prices. It’s also great fun and everyone’s so friendly.” My bargains of the night were a gorgeous across the body leather handbag for £4 and a lovely gold flower brooch for £1.50. This is definitely one for students on a budget and those feeling the credit squeeze.

Next I was on to Buffalo Boutique on a rather less sunny Tuesday evening. 2-4-1 cocktails and free cupcakes certainly helped to convince me this was one event I had to be at! And my instincts were right! The event was upstairs in the Buffalo Bar and when I arrived there was already quite a gathering, of mainly girls.

Buffalo Boutique is more vintage fair than flea market. Amongst the abundant vintage fare was Wardrobe Surgeon, an alternative fashion label that uses recycled clothing, reclaimed, scrap and vintage fabrics to create unique, one off

garments that take their inspiration from vintage shapes and historical fashion. I headed straight to one of the vintage stalls and dived into a large chest, hot on the heels of another bargain. I quickly struck gold; finding a gorgeous white Jane Shilton clutch for £7 and a pair of braces that my sister had been after for ages for £1!

My verdict: my bank holiday weekend vintage bargain hunt has been a success and while I may still be a bit of a novice, I’m hooked and will definitely be back for more next time!

Northcote Lane Market is held every first Sunday of the month (the next will be 7 June). For more information check out http://www.milgilounge.com/market.html.

Buffalo Boutique is held more sporadically. Look out for posters advertising the event or join their facebook group.

Check out Clufferfly and their fabulous jewellery designs http://www. clutterflyjewellery.com/.

Emily Knightley

fabulous all the same, Blind Lemon runs a vintage fashion fair twice a year, usually once in spring, once in winter, in Cardiff’s Great Hall.

Peruse at your leisure the vast array of vintage jewellery, clothing, shoes, accessories, and many other trinkets from various periods- quite frankly for all you vintage lovers, a wonderful way to spend an afternoon.

There are many a fancy dress shop in Cardiff but possibly the best for all your fancy dress needs is the Joke shop in Castle Arcade, boasting a generous collection of outfits, accessories, masks, and face paints, you can’t go wrong really.

Emily Cater

fashion@gairrhydd.com / 23

blinddate

Blind Date

Summer's here and love is in the air but will these two gorgeous singletons fall for each other?

Jenna

“

“

Panou

We drank a lot of wine... he can't handle his drink as well as me.

Blinddate: Jenna, lets get down to business , what would you rate Panou out of 10?

Jenna: I'll give him a 9.

Were there any highlights of the date?

Yeah the conversation was really easy and we didn't run out of things to talk about. He was really good fun.

What was the most interesting thing you learnt about Panou?

He lives near me at home, so we had a lot to talk about in that respect.

So were there any shocking moments?

No, he didn't really do anything shocking. We drank quite a lot of wine though and he can't handle his drink as well as me, so I think he was quite drunk by the end of the night. It was all good fun though.

Haha. So how would you describe Panou in three words?

Funny, charming and attentive - he's a really good listener.

So do you think you'll be in touch?

Yeah i think we could be good friends.

Time for the infamous question: chuck, fuck or marry?

Maybe fuck.

It's your last chance to take part

Blinddate: Panou now it's your turn to dish the dirt.

What would you rate Jenna out of 10?

Panou: It would definitely be a 10.

Woo, so what where the highlights of the date?

We just got on really well. We were talking all the time so didn't even get chance to eat much - we got through two bottles of wine though. We ended up going to Fun Factory after the date, which was cool.

What was the most interesting thing you learnt about Jenna?

Hmm, that her house mate's Dad is the guy who presents Grand Designs ( Kevin McCloud).

How would you describe Jenna in three words?

Pretty, fun and awesome.

So will you keep in touch?

Yeah i think so - we found out that we have friends in common so i think we'll have more nights out together.

Would you rather chuck, fuck or marry Jenna?

Definately fuck!

Jenna and Panou enjoyed a sensational meal at Mordaith Bar and Grill, Oceana. For bookings call 02920 233854

r. Don't miss out, email us! in a Blind Date this academic yea blinddate@gairrhydd.com / 25

Books

books

Made of red roses, satin hearts and onions

The Isle of Dogs, Daniel Davies (Serpent's Tail)

O

n picking up The Isle of Dogs I must admit that I was perfectly prepared to be frequently repulsed and more than mildly appalled.

The memoir of a thirty-nine year old civil servant who indulges in anonymous sex with strangers in car parks isn’t really the type of book I would expect to enjoy. However The Isle of Dogs left me pleasantly surprised. The numerous sex scenes

“

on several occasions I really did want him to get away from the police

“

of the novel are fairly detailed but also incredibly British; leaving you with no fear of turning the page to discover a toe-curling account of sexual assault.

The Isle of Dogs is well thought out and well written. I found myself oddly engaged with Jeremy Shepherd and his philosophy on life. I seemed to find myself becoming quite good friends with him and on several occasions I really did want him to get away from the police.

Although parts of the book did go over my head somewhat, I think you would need to be a psychiatrist to

26 /books@gairrhydd.com

work out why Jeremy left his highflying career to move back home. I was never quite sure if he was seeking peace in his life or if he simply suffered a mid-life crisis.

This book made me laugh, and it kept me turning the pages until the

unexpected end. It is definitely worth reading, whether you enjoy crude comedy or in depth discussion on the workings of the human mind. In its compact 186 pages The Isle of Dogs will offer you it all.

Emma Pocklington

books

T

he first glance down the titles of the short stories in this collection might raise your eyebrows slightly. For example, Killing The Village Cat, Pork Pie and Cherry Pie do make you wonder if the crimes involved are feline and pastry related. The book's subtitle is 'Crime Fiction With a Twist.' This might be crime fiction with a twist, but not the twist you might really desire in a book.

“

times we should all be as daring as possible and not hold back in the slightest.

Perhaps it's a generational thing though - none of the authors, from what information I can gather about them, are born in the era of Feminism, so perhaps being bold and daring isn't something they were encouraged to do. And I was once described in sixth form as 'a wild animal only just tamer than a feral creature.' So maybe I just want more

“

Written in Blood, Lindsay Ashford and Caroline Oakley (Honno)

In difficult times we should all be as daring as possible and not hold back in the slightest

Fortunately, some of the stories are actually a lttile more thrilling and, as might be expected from a women's press, there's some occasional manhating, which is always good.

The downside of this book is unfortunately its distinctive point the women writers. Sometimes the prose and storylines waver in soppy trite and avoid being quite as daring as they could be. Surely in difficult

than most people will ever give me.

Characters almost go places they wouldn't go themselves. Only ever almost though. That becomes a statement on the whole book. It's almost really good, but not daring enough.

Aisling Tempany

Books in Cardiff Literary events in May that aren't in a soaking Welsh field

As anyone reading this section knows, The Guardian Hay Festival takes place at the end of the month. Books can't be bothered with that. What's so great about an event that requires either reliable friends with reliable cars, or an £18 train fare to Hereford, followed by an hour long minibus along Welsh roads that were meant for horses.

27th May Riverfront, Newport - Poetry Reading with Paul Henry. At 1pm.

It may be in Newport but don't hold that against it. Someone's gotta go to Newport. And it's free.

3rd June Waterstones - A Book Launch at 6.30pm.

Paul Henry presents his new book and reads with Peter Dale. No idea what he's reading though, but probably not the instructions for flatpack furniture from IKEA. 2nd-3rd June

4th June

New Theatre - Performance of readings. 7.30pm.

Philip Madoc presents and performs readings by Dylan Thomas amd other Welsh writers. I guess this is what you do when you haven't got any material of your own to read out.

Wales Millenium Centre - Gay Fiction in Wales Today. 6.30pm.

John Sam Jones and Aled Islwyn discuss gay fiction in Wales. Sponsored by Academi undoubtedly good. Little Britain jokes not welcome.

books@gairrhydd.com/27

books

CAROLANN

DUFFY Emma Davies celebrates Carol Ann Duffy's appointment as the UK's

28 /books@gairrhydd.com

would ever accept the Laureateship, given that she claimed “no selfrespecting poet should have to” write a poem for a royal wedding.

It has been suggested that Duffy was originally touted for the role in 1999, but that Tony Blair was worried about middle England’s reaction to her sexuality. Instead the job was given to Andrew Motion who, having written just eight official poems during his 10-year tenure, has hardly been a Poet Laureate in the league of Betjeman or Hughes.

Many, particularly among younger generations, have grown to see the appointment of a Poet Laureate as an anachronism, as something irrelevant to modern-day life. Nobody cares anymore; nobody’s interested in bloody poetry these days. After all, poetry’s a bit too complicated, isn’t it?

Not in the case of Duffy, no. She has described the way in which she writes poetry as using “simple words, but in a complicated way”. Duffy’s poetry is graceful and intriguing; it expresses sometimes controversial ideas in often understated ways. She

writes poetry for everyone, not just for hardened poetry lovers.

It’s because of this that Duffy has accepted the role as Poet Laureate. She claims: "In accepting this Laureateship, I hope to contribute to people's understanding of what

“

It's time for a shake up.

Why does the honour have to be a tainted one?

“

C

arol Ann Duffy was one of the first poets whose work I fell in love with. I was 15, studying GCSE English and one of the few people in my class who wasn’t resentful of the fact that we were having to study bloody poetry.

Sadly, it seems that schoolkids today are deprived of hearing their teachers read out lines about “pouring the goldfish down the bog”, as ‘Education for Leisure’ was pulled last year from AQA’s GCSE anthology. Obviously it’s too edgy to teach a poem in which someone leaves the house with a kitchen knife now that kids actually do stab each other for kicks.

Basically, it’s fair to say that Carol Ann Duffy was never a safe choice for Poet Laureate. Despite this, she was appointed to the role on May 1, fending off competition from Simon Armitage and Wendy Cope. Not only the first Scot to take up the role, she’s also the first woman – not to mention the first lesbian – appointed in the post’s 341-year history. It has also seemed unlikely that Duffy

poetry can do and where it can be found." She has decided to donate her annual salary of £5,750 to the Poetry Society, funding a new prize for the best poetry collection of each year.

Peter Jay, Duffy’s former editor, has asserted that “the post can be a poisoned chalice. It is not a role I

books

new Poet Laureate. would wish on anyone - particularly not someone as forthright and uncompromising as Carol Ann." I must admit, this was my first reaction, too. Perhaps, though, it’s time for a shake-up. Why does the honour have to be a tainted one?

The role of a national poet is vital in celebrating Britain’s literary culture. I don’t agree that the Poet Laureate should have to write poems for royal occasions – indeed, Motion claimed this to be the hardest poetry he’d ever had to write. But an appointed poet to write about issues facing modern Britain?

It’s something that we arguably need, and a position which Duffy is more than qualified to fill.

As Creative Director of Manchester Metropolitan University’s Writing School, Duffy is obviously in touch with the younger generation of readers and writers. As such, we should embrace this, and recognise her appointment as something which may just help to drag poetry kicking and screaming into the mainstream consciousness of 21stcentury Britain.

Carol Ann Duffy in Quotes I give you an onion.

Its fierce kiss will stay on your lips, possessive and faithful as we are Valentine His name was no longer a certain spell for his face. The last hair on his head floated out from a book. His scent went from the house.

The will was read. See, he was vanishing Mrs Lazarus books@gairrhydd.com / 29

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L A T

I G

I D

Do I.T. Yourself

Tom Baker takes you through the anatomy of computers, so you don’t end up with a case filled with LEGO. >Graphics card: What you see is what you get. Not just for games, a high end video card is essential for animators and graphic programmers.

chronizes the rest of your computer. >Hard drive: Sexual innuendo not included. This is what stores all your illegally downloaded music.

>Processor: Whenever you want to do something, from playing games to opening facebook, everything has to be decoded and processed by this bad-boy. Faster, more powerful processors mean more programmes can be opened faster.

>RAM: A male sheep. All computers need one. Also stands for Random Access Memory and it’s what allows your computer to deal with multiple processes and access specific pieces of information.

>Motherboard: When a motherboard and a fatherboard love each other very much...This holds and syn-

>PSU: Not a drug, this is short for ‘Power Supply Unit’. It’s what supplies power, oddly enough. If the

wattage cannot support the other parts then expect overheating and melted plastic.

>Sound card: A card which is sound, mint, pukker. Well, it improves sound quality for when you absolutely must hear every single note of a song. >Cooling:Fans are the standard, but if you’re really daring liquid cooling will have your computer running at peak efficiency. Side note: Your computer is not an aquarium, the fish will die if you put them in there.

digital@gairrhydd.com / 31

digital

PC £39.99

T

he Warhammer franchise has been a gated community for the socially retarded mouth breathers who dwell in games workshop for a good few years now, and while I hold myself apart from these unwashed masses with a cattle prod, it has to be said that the Dawn of War series has been the object of my affection since its first iteration four years ago.

Because THQ have exhausted the original engine by releasing an anomalous amount of expansion packs, it only seems natural that they revamp the concept in keeping with current generation graphics.

While this is an admirable endeavor, it meant I couldn’t play the game until I shelled out £600 on a new computer that wouldn’t look out of place on the death-star.

Let me start off by saying this is not Dawn of War the way it used to be. It looks like it, with the representation of the characters and the sounds are lovingly reworked around the powerful new engine, but the game play is a million miles away from the original series. DOW2

32 / digital@gairrhydd.com

is a strategy game in its purest form, the resource management aspect is scaled down to the point where it may as well not show up and the build function is completely removed. At first this made me a tad angry, chairs may have been thrown and housemates bludgeoned, but soon the style grows on you.

The fact that you no longer have to constantly keep a track on your economy like a stock holder with OCD means that the learning curve for new players is remarkably shallow, whilst mastering some of the more complicated squad manoeuvers takes practice and skill. This is what separates Dawn of War 2 from its predecessor: army control requires skill. Sure in the original, your army required some degree of micromanagement, but by the time you built enough tanks to reduce your enemy to a sticky mess on the battlefield, the game was over. In Dawn of War 2 you are given dramatically less units to take command of, and losing a squad is a major setback rather than a minor annoyance,

digital

DAWN of WAR II making the whole experience much more immersive.

There are four playable races which are staples of the Dawn of war universe: the Space Marines, the Eldar and the Orks make a return, with the newcomers being the Tyrannids, for those gamers who felt as though the

“

I couldn’t play it until I shelled out on a new computer that wouldn’t look out of place on the death-star

“

Zerg in starcraft weren’t quite overpowered enough.

The leveling system is also pretty well implemented, forming an integrated part of the gameplay rather than an unnecessary extra for the World of Warcraft generation. Each army centers

around a commander, the different play styles with each races chosen leader will shape the way your army does battle, meaning even if you choose the same race as your opponent your playing styles could be dramatically different.

Online play is present and makes some welcome changes, such as a ranking system which only counts certain ranked matches. This means the issue in the previous games of picky server admins stacking one side full of professional players and the other side with people who play games with their feet does not arise as much. One annoying feature is that it automatically detects if you have a microphone and removes your ability to turn it off, meaning you get to listen to your team mates attempts at singing or shouting at their mother or significant other pretty much constantly throughout a game.

The only problems I can find with Dawn of War 2 are its balancing issues with units. In one match I was playing as Space Marines, and spent the better part of the match hoarding enough resources and leveling up

my base to bring out a single tank.

Not two minutes into the maiden voyage of my beloved tank was it instantly wiped out in two volleys from a unit outside of my field of vision equipped with a weapon that can only be described as a Lightning Cannon. When I looked at how much this unit cost to produce it turned out to be significantly less than the cost of an average unit of marines.

This may just highlight my own inadequacies with the game but it makes you wonder what the point in progressing any further in a match is when stronger units can be built from the get go.

This is just a minor issue, however, certainly not enough to stop me from playing, with the multiplayer alone offering hours of fun and a single player mission based campaign which feels adequately detached from random skirmishes to make both experiences seem different. The simply stunning graphics and overall presentation and innovations in gameplay make it an essential buy for any strategy fan.

Tom Baker

digital@gairrhydd.com / 33

arts

WILKOMMEN, BIENVENUE, WELCOME…

Cabaret New Theatre 01/05/09

M

ore than 40 years after the original Broadway show, 'Cabaret' is back with an all-star cast in a dazzling new production of the musical. Brought to stage by the creators of the West End hit 'Chicago', 'Cabaret' is a stunning display of show-stopping songs and choreography.

The show brings to light the glitzy world of the Kit Kat Klub and centres around the life and love of its sassy star, Sally Bowles. Set in 1930s Berlin, the club is a glamorous escape from the political unrest in the city, with the gradual rise of Nazism during the period. You can enter the Cabaret and 'leave your troubles outside'.

Taking on the challenging lead role in her theatrical debut is Samantha Barks, who is best known for her appearance on BBC's 'I'd Do Anything'. She may have missed out on playing Nancy in Oliver, but Samantha gives a convincing performance as the infamous Sally Bowles. Whilst her accent somewhat wavers, she has real stage presence and truly shines as she belts out the musical numbers.

The show is certainly not for the prudish, with tons of nudity and some pretty no-holds-barred sex scenes, but it is all brought to the stage with real humour and

style. Wayne Sleep appears in a hilarious three-in-a-bed romp, where he sends his inflated balloon flying across the stage.

The acclaimed dancer is fantastic in the role of Emcee, the exuberant Master of Ceremonies. He commands the stage and doesn't fail to include a few impressive dance routines in his act. Wayne Sleep embodies the spirit of Cabaret, he is racy and eccentric, but also has a dark edge to his performance.

What is powerful about the production is the juxtaposition between the uplifting world of the

Kit Kat Club and the gradual rise of the Nazi regime, all co-existing in Berlin. There is an undercurrent of fear and uneasiness in the show, which brilliantly reflects the social unrest in the city at the time.

As you are swept up in the wave of song and dance, it is easy to forget about the political context, which makes the production even more moving as it draws to its shocking conclusion.

With talented performers on centre stage, Cabaret is a mesmerizing piece of theatre. A glittering display of decadence.

Kate Budd

PROFILE: WAYNE SLEEP

Wayne Sleep is undoubtedly one of Britain’s most famous ballet dancers. He performed with the Royal Ballet and established a world record for doing a jump with twelve beats of the feet- professionally known as entrechatdouze. Sleep’s small stature as a male performer has seen him cast for a number of character roles within musical productions. Apart from a career in ballet he has

also choreographed, directed and acted. His appearance in the reality TV show “I’m a Celebrity Get Me out of Here” in 2003 put him back into the spotlight. Sleep has proved that age doesn’t matter as his latest performance in the West End version of Cabaret as the Emcee proves how multi-talented a performer Sleep is.

Lisa Evans

arts@gairrhydd.com / 35

going out

GOING OUT? G

iven the time of year, many of you could be forgiven for glossing over these next few pages. The ritual period of exam-related hermitage that descends around this time tends to encourage a blissful ignorance surrounding matters of going out, perhaps in the hope that it will seem less tragic that the past 3 weeks have been spent sleeping under a newspaper in the library with a desk chair welded to your arse.

Nevertheless, the end is in sight, and there are a whole host of events looming on the horizon ready to drown any memories of hard work

in a bass-soaked cocktail of rave.

First up, Wednesday 27th sees the ever popular afro-headed dub fiend Benga returning to Cardiff, playing Neuropol at Glo Bar. Friday 29th is a night for fans of the old-skool, as the legend Slipmatt headlines RetroElectro and Neil Landstrumm takes charge of things over at Holodeck.

This fortnight’s heavyweight lineups, however, come in the form of end of year parties from both C-Y-N-T and Aperture. On Friday 5th, Italian electro-monsters The Bloody Beetroots will be headlining an impressive C-Y-N-T roster that also features DJ Zinc, Feadz and Das Glow. The following night,

Aperture return to the Great Hall with another meaty Hospitality event featuring the like of High Contrast, Logistics, Goldie, Noisia and several more. Both look set to send the year off with style.

So, keep the faith and push on through the hard times, because the light at the end of the tunnel is looking ever sweeter. If you’ve not actually finished by then and you simply can’t wait that long, then these nights will have ‘RETAKE’ written all over them in big sweaty letters.

The Going Out Team -x-

COMING SOON...

C -Y-N-T End Of Exams Blowout - Clwb ifor Bach -

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Aiding them on the night will be Frenchman DJ Feadz, of the infamous Ed Banger Records crew, who has been a mainstay of the French dance music scene

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for some time now. Alongside him will be drum n bass legend turned electro-head DJ Zinc, playing some serious party wobble, as well as the up-and-coming act Das Glow.

Feadz

The Bloody Beetroots

ith the veritable riot caused last year by the performance of Boys Noize, the bar has been set pretty high for this year’s C-Y-N-T end of exams party.

Determined not to be outdone, however, the lineup for 2009 looks set to blow the roof off the Welsh Club in exactly the manner we have come to expect from one of the most prolific club nights in Cardiff over the past year.

Topping the bill are none other than Italy’s craziest mask-wearing party duo The Bloody Beetroots.

Having surged onto the scene in the wake of fellow artists and countrymen Crookers, The Beetroots have built a formidable reputation as one of the most certifiably

insane live performance acts you are ever likely to encounter. Each looking like the bastard offspring of Spiderman and a Mexican luchador wrestler, their uncompromising inyour-face variety of Italo-electro has won them devoted fans across the globe. Now signed to Steve Aoki’s notorious Dim Mak label, their performances in the UK are incredibly rare and an appearance in Cardiff is another national first for C-Y-N-T.

Given the number of acts on the bill, the night looks set to be wall-towall headliners from start to finish.

With that much energy compressed into one space it’ll be a wonder the whole building doesn’t collapse…

This will certainly be one party that is sure to go down in memory in the years to come.

C-Y-N-T End Of Exams Blowout, Friday 5th June, Clwb Ifor Bach, £12adv.

going out

REVIEWS

25.5.09 7.6.09 27.5 • Neuropol pres. Benga + Dread MC, Glo Bar, 9pm, £5 28.5 • C-Y-N-T (House/Electro/Techno), Clwb Ifor Bach, 10.30pm, £3/4 29.5 • Holodeck pres. Neil Landstrumm, Clwb Ifor Bach, 10.30pm, £6/7 • RetroElectro pres. Slipmatt, Glo Bar, 9pm, £3/5 • High Society HedKandi party with Charlie Edwards, Glam, 10pm, £5adv.

30.5 • TimeFlies with Sean Tyas, Glam, 10pm, £TBA 31.5 • We Love Sundaes BBQ Party (House/Electro), Glo Bar, 8pm, FREE

5.6 • Chrome Kids vs. Big City Beats (Dubstep/Electro/Fidget), Glo Bar, £TBA • C-Y-N-T End of Year Blowout feat.

The Bloody Beetroots, Feadz, DJ Zinc, Das Glow, Clwb Ifor Bach, 10pm, £12adv.

6.6 • Aperture pres. Hospitality feat.

High Contrast, Goldie, Noisia + more, Union Great Hall, 9pm, £15adv.

• Lamerica pres. Buzzin Fly Records party with Ben Watt, Chris Woodward + more, Glam, 10pm, £10adv.

• Electrocity pres. Tim Sheridan, Undertone, 10pm, £8.

- Clwb Ifor Bach -

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espite being forcibly ‘kettled’ along with fifty or so other club-goers in a fashion similar to that of London’s recent G20 protests, the atmosphere at C-Y-N-T’s bank holiday party was so electric that even this can be forgiven.

Apparent problems with the selling of fake tickets meant that Clwb Ifor Bach had well exceeded its capacity. This led to a group of revellers, myself included, being held in the downstairs hallway for over half an hour by a group of violent doormen with the apparent

took to the stage, working things into a frenzy. Offering something for even the pickiest of tastes (even sneaking in EMF’s You’re Unbelievable!) he made the room explode while his cool-looking crew crowd surfed, threw around inflatable beach balls and generally looked as if they were having the most amazing time. Everyone involved felt as if they were a part of something really special.

“

Everyone involved felt as if they were a part of something really special

By the time A1 Bassline hit the stage the large crowd had shrunk to a more intimate size, although no less energised. The sign of a shirtless, gurning, sweaty guy table dancing above me indicated that it was time to hit the sack and I left the club in a happy C-Y-N-T induced haze.

Meme Sgroi

Simian Mobile Disco

4.6 • C-Y-N-T pres. Official Bloom Festival Warm-up Party (House/ Electro/Techno), Clwb Ifor Bach, 10pm, £3/4

Simian Mobile Disco, Kissy Sell Out & A1 Bassline

“

CLUB LISTINGS

strength and brain capacity of Popeye. Simian Mobile Disco’s set was already halfway through by the time I was permitted upstairs. However, what I did see was absolutely mindblowing. Acid fuelled noise kept the insomniacs firmly in mind, and there were definitely a lot of those on display.

Later in the night Kissy Sell Out (his intriguing moniker derived from the times he claims to have repressed an urge for filthy music in favour of playing crowd pleasers)

goingout@gairrhydd.com/37

goinggoing out out

HEAVIER

THAN HEAVEN Kirstin Knight talks to Dave Shaw about Cardiff's homegrown drum and bass brand perture is Cardiff’s definitive drum and bass brand.

Hosted by a variety of venues all over the city, it has officially existed since 2005. However, the history of Cardiff's best-loved drum and bass night is a lot longer than that.

"Gareth Davies (aka DJ Truth), Lincoln Barrett (aka High Contrast) and I ran a night at Metros but we got banned for eight months," Dave tells me. "We decided to start an alternative, and Lincoln had all these drum and bass records, so we decided to put on a D&B night.

That existed for about three years under the moniker Neuropol.

“Aperture as it’s known now started in Moloko, where I used to work as a designer. When it got bought out, we went back to Metros for a while, before relocating to Welsh Club. It’s kind of funny, because we came round full circle.”

Over the years Aperture have played host to drum and bass stalwarts like Calibre, Alix Perez, Klute, Logistics, London Elektricity and Silent Witness, to name but a few.

What is it that makes this genre so special?

“I love all kinds of music,” Dave says, “but it’s the ethos that goes with drum and bass that I really like. I used to be into punk rock, which has the same

home-grown, organic thing going on.

There’s a real sense of community.”

The Aperture Family is all about showcasing local talent, and I’m interested to know whether big brands like Bedlam coming to Cardiff pose a threat to that. Dave shrugs. “There’s room for both, I think. It’s the commercial element of big nights that I don’t like; it’s something I veer away from. That’s why I originally chose Glo Bar as a venue. Its size makes it perfect for showcasing smaller artists, which is what I really wanted to do.”

“

The Aperture Family is all about showcasing local talent

“

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What exactly goes into organising one of Cardiff’s most successful nights, then? “Mostly it’s about chasing agents for tour dates and bookings, and doing promotional stuff like designing flyers. I spend a lot of time listening to demos from local DJs, trying to find new talent. On the night, the main thing is to stay sober and look after the DJs.”

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I’ve heard that DJs can be demanding when it comes to riders; at a recent gig, Benga apparently asked for Grey Goose vodka. That’s quite a specific request. Dave frowns. “No, most people are pretty cool. It’s the agents who hassle you, if anything. Krust asked for two different types of champagne.

DJ Derek always wants four bottles of Dragon Stout, and they’re not allowed to go in the fridge. He’s very clear on that...”

What's the best part about being a promoter? “Seeing the audience reaction. When the DJ drops the beat and I look out and see everyone with their hands in the air, I feel as though I’m the one playing the records. It’s a real rush.” And the worst? “Nerves.

Even before the smaller shows, I’ll be stressing for days. A big night at the Union is really nerve-wracking.

If something goes wrong, you can lose 14 grand in a night. That’s a lot of money.”

On parting, I ask him to complete the sentence “Aperture is...” He sits and thinks for a minute before answering. “Aperture is... everybody’s.”

You heard the man - get involved!

Aperture Records’ debut digital release is planned for June 6, just in time for Hospitality: High Contrast and Friends, feat. Goldie, Cyantific, Logistics and Noisia, Great Hall, £15adv

going out

HIGH CONTRAST

High Contrast

FIVE MINUTES WITH

You have achieved so much in this genre. What makes drum and bass special for you?

I just clicked with drum and bass.

Something fits; I find it a good way to express myself. There are always new things I want to do with it. It’s a very malleable medium.

Hospital is now over 10 years old. How do you think they have shaped the genre over this time?

When Hospital first started, they were complete outsiders to the scene. Their tunes didn't get much play from any of the big DJs, but now, they're arguably the biggest D&B label. They run some of the most successful raves, and the whole genre has embraced the kind of sounds Hospital pioneered.

Drum and bass seems to be constantly reinventing itself. Where do you think the sound is heading?

I think we're turning a corner and moving away from the Pendulumcopycat sound that has dominated the last few years. Things are getting interesting again; producers are taking more chances. I certainly feel inspired to be more experimental.

What are the three greatest moments of your career so far?

The phone call from Tony signing me to Hospital Records; hearing Fabio & Grooverider play my first tune on Radio 1; and DJing at Glastonbury for the first time, in wellies and fisherman trousers.

What does it mean for you to have a huge Hospitality come to your home town?

Cardiff was the first town outside of London to put on a Hospitality event, way back at the humble Moloko venue. So it's great to see how far we've come and how big the events are now.

REVIEW: Aperture pres. Total Science / Makoto and Deeizm

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s a general rule, I hate MCs. So do a lot of people I know. I’m not saying that it isn’t a skill; it just happens to be a skill that few people have actually mastered.

There’s nothing worse than hearing your favourite tunes drowned out by some sweaty imbecile who has snooted more cocaine than is strictly healthy.

So when I heard about the unlikely combo of lady MC Deeizm and her Japanese counterpart Mokoto, I

didn’t expect a lot.

However, I am proven wrong.

Deeizm has a beautiful, soulful, lyrical voice. She doesn’t shout, she sings. And she is really, really good.

Within minutes I am edging away from my boyfriend and towards the stage. I have developed a girl crush.

Sadly, so have most the people around me: sometimes I wonder if anyone is listening to the music, they are all so desperate to get her attention. (I won’t say anything about that sweaty rapist man who took his shirt

off. You know who you are.)

The downside is that Deeizm completely steals the show. Makoto has a very amenable, chilled brand of drum and bass, but his set is instantly forgettable.

Total Science continues in much the same vein. The music chugs along nicely, but if I’m totally honest I don’t remember a single track that was played.

Boys, it’s time to raise your game – or the ladyfolk will leave you trailing. You have been warned…

goingout@gairrhydd.com/39

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Fantastic Mr Cocker

Primavera

According to Colin Greenwood, the world's favourite band Radiohead have began recording the follow-up to 2007's In Rainbows. Cue ecstatic air-punching and public signs of overblown gratitude from music fans worldwide. Yes, we're are very pleased. What's more interesting, however, is how Thom Yorke and co. will follow the controversial style of release that In Rainbows offered.

The choose-your-own-price system has been criticised, idolised and generally blogged to death by fans and musicians alike since it's initial availability. It'll be interesting to see whether they opt for a conventional style of release this time around, or another plan to piss off music industry big wigs.

Rumour has it that Jarvis Cocker is set to play a puppet version of himself in the forthcoming Wes Anderson film Fantastic Mr Fox. The revelation that Jarvo isn't already a human in puppet-form is enough, but add this to the bizarre exposure the ex-Pulp man has received over the last few weeks, and we've got a strange case. Rehearsing with improvising kiddies in a French art gallery, soundtracking yoga classes; this is all a bit weird even for Sheffield's coolest book worm.

Look a little closer and you'll see there's a new album, and a string of festival appearances to go alongside these frivolities. Album promotion has come a long way, and Mr Cocker is at the forefront.

Last weekend's Dot To Dot event in Bristol marks the beginning of this year's festival period, and there's some truly splendid line-ups for your consideration. Look out for our Festivals Special next issue, but for now we'd like to draw your attention to sunny Barcelona and this week's Primavera Sound weekend.

A host of spectacular bands - Sonic Youth and My Bloody Valentine included - and not a tent in sight!

Even better is the fact that we've got a couple of flights booked and a ticket each. I'm sorry, that's the real reason this has been brought up.

This news section has often fallen victim to our child-like enthusiasm, and I'm afraid to say this week is no exception.

discoverlocal...

An eager crowd gathered at Buffalo Bar to witness a sample of local talent along with the Norwegian electro-pop outfit Casiokids.

The second Quench Live saw an improved line-up dished up by the student rag including youngsters Hyener, the more experienced Decimals and headliners Casiokids.

Hyener were the unexpected gem in the pack showing creativity with their krautrock influenced electronica and post-punk-disco.

Decimals provided a memora-

Quench Live. Buffalo Bar. 11/5/09

ble, albeit heavier, sound than the headliners, but still maintained a poppy ambience. Powerful riffs and synths combined well with angsty vocals, but they were somewhat overshadowed by the headliners' fluidity and charm.

Casiokids provided a high tempo end to the night with their analogue and trashy keyboard infused pop melodies that brought the packedout Buffalo into a frenzy.

The Norwegians switched styles aimlessley throughout the set so

much so that it is difficult to pin their noise down. Variables included high vocals, jumping melodies, dance-y backing tracks and slashy postpunk guitars. Despite their frequent visits to Cardiff over the past few months - Swn festival included - it's no wonder that they continue to pack out venues on each trip. By the time it came to their last and probably best song, Fot I Hose, the crowd had been truly energised and Casiokids really delivered.

Simon Lucey

music@gairrhydd.com / 41

music

Guy Ferneyhough and Kyle Ellison pack their bags and go to Butlins to savour ATP VS THE FANS PART II: The Fans Strike Back

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TP stands for All Tomorrow's Parties, a musical festival like no other. Located in Somerset's Butlins Holiday Resort in Minehead, the event showcases a wide range of alternative music.

Revellers stay in the same chalets that British holiday makers stay in, and performances take place on stages usually reserved for the red coats. Since all the sets take place within the Butlins complex it doesn't matter whether it's raining, and you can make use of all the onsite facilities; pubs, a Burger King, an aqua park, mini-golf, bowling, and slot machines that over the weekend conspired to steal all our change...

FRIDAY After checking into our chalet and quenching our thirst it was over to the Pavillion stage to check out Jeffrey Lewis. The anti-folk hero was in fine form, decked out in a Devo hat and Spillers t-shirt. The Pavillion stage is ATP's biggest capacity live space, and Jeffrey

42 / music@gairrhydd.com

adjusted his setlist accordingly throwing in a lot more of his rockier numbers than usual.

Next it was over to catch buzzband HEALTH. Hype inevitably leads to certain negative expectations of a band, but the LA noise-quartet made any negative preconceptions look dumbfounded. Pulsating rhythms and unbridled energy ultimately made HEALTH's performance one of the weekend's best.

If you pick anyone not to be intimidated by performing after such an awesome set, nine times out of ten you'd choose Andrew WK. Half rock set, half motivational seminar, WK brought the party; and this included bringing on stage a bunch of his friends; Bad Brilliance is pictured above.

Continuing in the theme of fun, Devo were up next on the main stage. Wearing their trademark yellow suits and red hats, the band proved that age is no barrier to getting a thousand neurotic indie fans to get their groove on.

Antipop Consortium rounded off the night, the hip-hop group had beats to burn, and contributed to my dead legs the next day.

SATURDAY After taking the Friday to settle in to our chalet and recover from partying a little too hard, it’s a fine thing to wake up to the mellifluous sounds of Nico Muhly. Playing with a variety of guests, the New York composer is a joy to watch.

By stark contrast to this pleasant start to the day was Qui, Jesus Lizard frontman David Yow’s side project, who rock the centre stage as you would expect. His first of three performances during the weekend is definitely the most subdued, but showcases the widest range of material.

After a pleasant if slightly underwhelming performance from Cardiff post-punk legends Young Marble Giants, it’s over to the Pavillion Stage to catch Brooklyn indie darlings Grizzly Bear. This is perhaps the most highly anticipated performance of the weekend and it doesn’t disappoint, with four gorgeous vocals combining effortlessly to create something quite special.

Another festival veteran is Beirut’s Zach Condon, who’s up next with a reminder of just how

music

one of the world's premier alternative music festivals, All Tomorrow's Parties many great songs he has at his disposal. This headline set really makes use of Butlins’ largest stage, as the brass sounds fill the air euphorically. Condon also wins the award for best artist comment mid set, asking the crowd, “shall I put a donk on it?�

Although legs are tired after a day of great live music, the chance to catch Glaswegian electro outfit Errors is not to be passed up. Perhaps the danciest set of the entire festival, the crowd are clearly appreciative of something upbeat and mindless, which is arguably something absent from this year's festival.

Finally bringing Saturday to a close in the most intimate surroundings of the Red stage, is Marnie Stern. Yet another artist from New York, she shows off her miraculous guitar wielding talents set to the tune of spiky punk rock songs. Despite a brief technical failure towards the end, Stern brings her ridiculously titled second album to life with excellent results.

With only doom metal legends Sleep left to see, we opt for Western themed pub Crazy Horse

at this point for a much needed drink.

SUNDAY Saturday's much needed drink turned into an unwelcome hangover, and most of Sunday afternoon was spent recovering on the beach with an ice cream.

As the tide came in and the sun came down we trudged inside with sand in our shoes to catch heroes of the Cardiff indie scene Future Of the Left. After expressing their dismay at not being considered an ATP band by an internet forum user (being lumped together with Elbow and MGMT no less), the band launched into a set that proved, once again, why people who post opinions on the net are generally wrong. Bad, brash and brutiful, FOTL left the audience's appetite suitably whetted for their new record, Travels With Myself And Another; the band explicitly reminded everyone who downloaded the leaked version to buy it, and I'm extending this request.

Parts & Labour were next, and probably constituted the biggest disappointment of the weekend.

The stage was too big for them, the sound wasn't great, and they're a band who arguably don't have the live chops to follow such competant entertainers as Future Of the Left; I mean Kelson actually went into the crowd and did sit-ups, like actual sit-ups!

Parts & Labour was a painful experience, but thankfully The Mae Shi provided the antidote; is there a funner band to see alive today? Their experimental poppunk got everyone pogoing, and the LA quartet then draped the audience with a giant parachute the crowd inevitably hoisted it up above their heads, creating the festival's only tent. What fun!

From young upstarts to reformed indie legends, The Jesus Lizard played their second set of the weekend, and their second set after a ten year hiatus. While the general consensus was that they were better on the Saturday, Yow and co still brought a rocktageous performance to the table.

This Will Destroy You played out proceedings, while it was essentially post-rock by numbers it did capture the 'epicness' of the weekend we had just enjoyed.

music@gairrhydd.com / 43

music

albums albums albums albums THE MACCABEES Wall Of Arms Fiction Records

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and direction here, but somehow it feels lacklustre. With no release, it’s all a bit too thought provoking, too emotionally lingering, too dull; something The Maccabees could never have previously been accused of.

Keen to shed their art-pop roots, it’s unsurprising that this new motive is personal and the band have undoubtedly stuck a stern middlefinger to their critics. “If you have no kind words to say, then you should say nothing more at all”, scorns Weeks. So you know what. I won’t.

Adam Woodward

are far short of seamless - but the overall impact is one of complexity, and there’s a great deal of ambiguity that shrouds the album.

Clark stays somewhat detached from her lyrics. Some truly forlorn and wretched song writing is delivered sweetly, but vacantly, and there’s little audible emotional on display.

On the few occasions where Clark allows herself to break this detachment – The Neighbours in particular - it’s only a matter of seconds before she realises herself, and snaps back into her vocal neutrality.

More ambiguity then, but it’s Actor’s arrangement that provides

more than enough emotive value to keep the album ticking. It’s difficult to gauge the overall feeling in some of Clark’s writing, particularly with the mentioned vocal style. It’s only when songs break into overdriven guitar instrumentals (Strangers) or brooding string sections (Black Rainbow) that they truly reveal themselves, and it’s these glimpses into Actor’s nature that make it so alluring. St. Vincent certainly doesn’t wear her heart on her sleeve, but there’s nothing more interesting than hearing something you’ll never really understand.

Phil Guy

6

St. Vincent

o longer dawning on the melancholy of adolescent love or the frivolities of their local swimming pool, Wall Of Arms is a huge progression from the bands colourful 2007 debut.

Here the Brighton based fivepiece dare down a notably darker path, producing a richer, more

mature sound, full of subversive undertones and brooding lyrics.

Orlando Weeks’ unmistakable quiver is instantly more evocative than before, at times almost haunting in its reverberation.

Teaser-single No Kind Words is one of the stand out songs of the year, yet its pensiveness resonates for far too long, as the rest of the album takes a disappointing turn into unforgettable territory. Somehow, you can’t help but sense an overconsciousness of making another singles album. Ultimately it’s just no fun. There is certainly more cohesion

ST. VINCENT Actor 4AD

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hroughout Actor, Annie Clark – aka St Vincent – is a difficult one to pin down. Veering uncompromisingly between menacing orchestral pieces, folk-tinged pop and electronic glitching, Clark displays some true diversity in the shaping of her songs. It’s certainly confusing in parts - transitions between tracks and song segments

44 /music@gairrhydd.com

8

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albums albums albums albums THE HORRORS Primary Colours XL Recordings

“

Primary Colours

is both beautiful and

slightly unpleasant at

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the same time, like a

rainbow reflected in a petrol puddle

Drawing upon inspirations as disparate as The Kinks, DAF and My Bloody Valentine, Primary Colours is both beautiful and slightly unpleasant at the same time, like a rainbow reflected in a petrol puddle on a garage forecourt. Tracks like Sea Within A Sea and Who Can Say demonstrate a softer vocal style for Faris Badwan, yet this is tempered by Joshua Third and Tomethy Furst’s distorted and warped synths and guitars. All in all, Primary Colours is an exhiliarating listen, and I can only imagine what they’ll produce next.

Ben Marshall

9

The Horrors

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f The Horrors' first album, Strange House, was the musical equivalent of a poke in the eye; short, sharp and entirely unexpected, then Primary Colours is an audio dead leg; at once distressing, unexpectedly long lasting and will leave you a surprisingly colourful reminder of its impact.

The shock-headed garage rock geeks, so effortlessly self-parodied as The Black Tubes, alas are long gone. Instead, in their place are five subterranean musical mad scientists intent on collecting all that you knew about the last 50 years of music, and smashing it together in some kind of sonic high-flux beam reactor.

Swoon

GOD HELP THE GIRL God Help The Girl

Dangerbird Records

Rough Trade

SILVERSUN PICKUPS

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ith Swoon, Silversun Pickups have confidently broken the difficult second album barrier, seamlessly integrating dream pop with intricate string arrangements and fuzzy guitars. Indeed, the complex overdubbing of Brian Aubert’s guitar parts combined with his softly-spoken vocals are more than reminiscent of early 90s Smashing Pumpkins, particularly on riff-heavy tracks like Sort Of. Despite wearing their influences on their sleeve, the Pickups are more than capable of putting out better material than Billy Corgan has in years. Album opener There’s No Secrets This Year kicks and screams with life and a chorus that will ensnare the audience from the first listen. The lyrical content is suitably dark, dealing with lost love and disturbing fantasies that seem to twist and turn around the instrumental melodies.

Swoon is an atmospheric, emotional and powerful record from a band that only looks set to improve on an already successful formula.

Michael Brown

7

B

elle and Sebastian’s frontman Stuart Murdoch flexes his indie-pop muscle within a much broader harmonic sphere. The result is an outstanding multi-faceted musical narrative spanning the emotional spectrum of chief vocalist Catherine Ireton.

The genres blur in an incredibly refreshing way, ageing with her as she sings a life-story of love, loss and loneliness. Backboned by a 45 piece orchestra and strong influences from musicals, this journey will take you from lounging in a late night jazz café, to bopping along with a sixties girl group and then toe-tapping to classic pop and eighties indie as Catherine grows up, falls in love, breaks up and then spends the remainder of the album wishing she hadn’t.

This is a truly original album, not that generic ‘original’ we’re getting all far too used to. Although a depressing end for the girl, who I suppose God did not help after all, a breath of much needed innovative air for the rest of us.

Natalie Stone

8

music@gairrhydd.com / 45

music

live live live live live live live ABE VIGODA, MAE SHI

Buffalo Bar 13/05/09

The Mae Shi

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s a venue famed for hosting some of the world's most exciting live performances, it's something quite special to see two bands from Los Angeles' The Smell play in Cardiff on one night. With support from Manchester's experimental pop trio Cats In Paris this might be the line-up of the year, but tonight's crowd is split between this and a rare Cursive performance over in Clwb Ifor Bach.

Not letting Buffalo Bar's empty spaces get the better of them, Cats In Paris appear on stage to a delightful montage of footage from Jurassic Park, accompanied by its euphoric soundtrack. Their set is comprised of several new songs which go down well, as well as some old favourites too.

While The Mae Shi had been billed as headliners, a last minute switch around sees them play next.

As ever, they are on top form, and while the crowd might have been subdued as the band arrived on stage, The Mae Shi are perhaps the world's most fun band and this is massively infectious.

This just leaves Abe Vigoda to play through the highlights of their debut, Skeleton, in their first ever Cardiff performance. Their sound is considerably beefed up in a live setting, and provides the perfect climax to a wonderful night.

Kyle Ellison

LA ROUX

The Globe 03/05/09

T

he Radar Tour is said to preview the best in new music from the UK, with a line-up including recent chart toppers La Roux and Essex's very own disco-rockers Magistrates, the evening was certainly set to be a good one.

The Chapman Family kicked off

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proceedings with a nonchalant blend of post-punk and modern indie, the quartet from Stockton on Tees have created something more in their short lifespan than most other bands could hope for in a decade - something refreshing and exciting.

Heartbreak followed suit with big moustaches and even bigger beats.

Their dark disco pop certainly invoked movement on the dance-floor and left me with the impression I was an extra in a bizarre 80s movie, a feeling I do not experience quite as often as I'd like. Unfortunately I spent most of their set eagerly awaiting

Magistrates, who I am still 'eagerly awaiting' as they didn't turn up.

However, the Magistrates sized hole in my evening was soon filled

by La Roux who were on top form.

Front-woman Elly delivered a vocal performance which seemed disproportionately huge compared to her tiny frame, but we all know that good things come in small packages and Elly is a fine example. As over-produced as their studio sound is she has managed to create an impressive live set and the band are inevitably set for ongoing success.

Rich Beech

music

live live live live live live live YOUNGBLOOD BRASS BAND

The Globe 07/05/09

A

Girls Aloud

s soon as I heard that Youngblood Brass Band were playing in Cardiff, I knew that I would be going, and oh, how glad I am that I did.

Supported by the astounding MC Xander, the night was set for what would turn out to be the best gig of my life.

There’s no other way to put it, Youngblood Brass Band are genius.

Their raw energy is outstanding.

Made entirely of horns, voice and drums the 9 piece from New York layer rap vocal over an infectious horn section. Loud, in your face and incredibly energetic, their music is totally original.

Senses refused to stand still while a huge smile was brought across the face of the crowd who went suitably crazy Nuclear Summer. Not one person was left standing still as Youngblood proceeded to blow the roof off The Globe with their huge sound and totally awe inspiring set.

Gareth Ludkin

GIRLS ALOUD 02 Arena 26/04/09

E

ver since Cheryl Cole cemented herself as the new ‘nation’s sweetheart’ on The X Factor, it has officially become cool to like Girls Aloud. Seven years after winning Popstars: The Rivals the girls are at the peak of their popularity and the secret to their success? They have the formula to produce a damn good pop tune down pat.

With a highly visual and energetic set that lasted nearly two hours, Sarah, Kimberley, Cheryl, Nadine and Nicola proved their credentials as fully fledged popstrels. I have always been sceptical of Cheryl

and co’s ability to sing live, but boy could I not have been more wrong.

Although Nadine is clearly the singer of the band with her powerhouse vocals, recognition should go to Ms Cole for an impressive performance, who should now have silenced any critics doubting her ability to pull off a solo career.

The dance routines made it a treat for the eyes and never in my life have I been more jealous of a metal pole as the girls showed off their acrobatic pole dancing skills to a cover of Womanizer – and sung Britney out of the pop playground (but since when has that been difficult?).

The highlight of the set was undoubtedly current single Untouchable which saw the girls travel over the audience’s heads and land on a stage at the back of the packed out O2. It also took balls to put a number of their biggest and best known hits

into a medley for the encore, but one that led to one of the most euphoric moments of the evening in the crowd and was most definitely pulled off with confidence.

However, the show was not without its hitches. The momentum was brought down with the strange decision to perform a cover of Broken Strings. Although a courageous effort, the song doesn’t really make sense without the male/ female vocal combo, and they probably should have stuck to their own hits given they have such a strong back catalogue to pick from. Also, not to mention the technical boob at the start of the show where the girls emerged from the floor and into the air on individual podiums, except for Cheryl that is, who remained underground for the entire first chorus of The Promise.

Ash Percival

music@gairrhydd.com / 47

music

singlesoftheweek

Listings Monday 25th Future Of The Left @ Clwb

Tuesday 26th

Wednesday 27th Final Fantasy @ St. George's, Bristol Super Furry Animals @ Sub 29

Eminem

Super Furry Animals @ Sub 29 Attack! Attack! @ Barfly Micachu @ Buffalo

Thursday 28th Maximo Park @ O2 Academy, Bristol Super Furry Animals @ Sub 29

Friday 29th Threatmantics @ Tommy's Bar

Eminem

We Made You Interscope

Guess who’s back? It’s Eminem, and he's brought with him a load of lame comedy rhymes and outdated references from the 90s. Dre’s half decent production is hardly enough to save this one. KE

Saturday 30th

The National/St. Vincent

Surface Unsigned Festival @ Barfly

Sleep All Summer Merge Records

Sunday 31st Surface Unsigned Festival @ BarflyThe Macabees @ Great Hall

Tuesday 2nd Baddies @ Barfly Cryptacize @ Buffalo

Wednesday 3rd The Horrors @ Thekla, Bristol

Thursday 4th De La Soul @ O2 Academy, Bristol

Saturday 6th Mahjongg @ Clwb Ifor Bach

48 / music@gairrhydd.com

4

7

Innerpartysystem Heart Of Fire Island

6

Like Nine Inch Nails but with more dance-y, ‘anthemic’ choruses, Innerpartysystem offer up the now tried and tested formula of synths n’ guitars that, despite sounding unremarkable, remains compelling. MB

Burial/Four Tet

8

Moth/Wolf Cub Text

It's not a secret National release unfortunately, it's a Crooked Fingers cover for Merge's 20th Anniversary.

The vocal combination of Matt Berninger and St. Vincent is intriguing, and it's pleasant enough. PG

A mysterious split single between Kieran Hebden and the previouslyanonymous dubstep mastermind.

Few details, little promotion, vinyl only, no artwork - it's shady, but very good. PG

The Decemberists

British Sea Power

This song can be looked upon in two ways – the gruesome tale of a man who decides to murder his entire family, or an impressive debut single from new album The Hazards of Love.

Take your pick. SR

Swirling instrumental based around BSP's 2005 song North Hanging Rock. Out of context from forthcoming Man Of Aran soundtrack, it's a strange single choice. GP

The Rake Song Capitol

Grizzly Bear Two Weeks Warp

8

10

The first cut from the Brooklyn quartet's new record, Veckatimest, is a lesson to anyone who ever wondered how to craft the gloriously ambitious folk-pop. ED

Boy Vertiginous Rough Trade

Passion Pit The Reeling Columbia

6

4

This is a child’s drawing of an electro song, decorated with shrill vocals and garishly colourful melodies. A bit sickly sweet for my liking and the hooks just don’t work. KE

film

star trek dir: j.j. abrams cast: chris pine, zachary quinto, carl urban out now, 127 mins Synopsis: When an intimidating alien vessel threatens the safety of the entire universe, it's up to Star Fleet and the crew of the U.S.S Enterprise to intervene and save earth from impending and total annihilation.

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or a self-confessed Star Trek novice, J.J Abrams’ decision to boldy go where so many film-makers have gone before was always going to have the potential for catastrophe. Any pre-laid anxieties, however, are laid to rest in the opening minutes of this stunning space saga.

Various nods to the campy 70s television original do stand out, but the film never goes so far as to impede the narrative by stopping the action for the sake of an in-yourface in-joke. The inclusion of such homages may seem like a given, considering the potential temptation of dropping in a Vulcan death grip here or a “beam me up” there, but

50 /film@gairrhydd.com

Abrams’ resistance of such flagrant sentimentality gives this film a much needed sense of individuality.

Without exception, the cast is flawless, balancing subtle performances with at times tongue-in-cheek charicature. The only thing lacking is the presence of an omnipotent super-villain, but in any case Eric Bana’s scowling Captain Nero is a fitting space thug, who keeps the punches rolling without ever taking attention away from the films central stars.

The action is some of Abrams’ finest, pulling you in yet never resorting to full-blown sensory assault. The director, producer and all-round movie mogul shows that when he sets his phaser to stun, few come close to matching his intuitive knack for delivering bonevaporising Sci-fi spectacle.

The Star Trek franchise has always endeavoured to thrill and provide escapism, something which since the largely disappointing Star Wars prequels had been all but lost in space. This latest installment not only embodies the tone set by its numerous predecessors, it might just renew the next generations affinity for Captain James T. Kirk and his stellar crew.

Adam Woodward

****

coraline dir: henry selick cast: dakota fanning, teri hatcher, keith david out now, 100 mins Synopsis: Bored after her parents’ work commitments leave them too busy amuse her, spunky young Coraline (Fanning) finds a doorway to an alternate world in which her ‘Other Mother’ (Hatcher) caters to her every whim. Beneath this benevolent exterior, however, lurks a horrific secret.

I

n an age where we are used to the eye-popping animations of Pixar, and the CGI brilliance of too-many-films-to-name, movies that genuinely inspire a sense of awe are difficult to come by.

Be thankful for Coraline then, which is, quite simply, beautiful.

The stop-motion caricatures and interactive settings are a sight to behold, providing the same sense of atmosphere that made The Nightmare Before Christmas such a hit, whilst retaining the sense of story and most importantly humanity that recent pretenders such as Igor have perhaps been lacking.

film

The magnificent graphics are in no way let down by the story, which perfectly balances the young protagonist’s sense of self-righteous indignation with a child’s vulnerability. This may be a kid’s film, but there is something on offer for all ages here.

For the most part, the voice cast is spot on. Fanning impresses yet again, exuding youth and energy in a role she is perfectly suited to.

If she carries on at this rate, surely superstardom beckons. Hatcher too is excellent, providing surprising versatility in her dual role as Coraline’s mother and her sinister ‘Other Mother’ that will surprise Desperate Housewives fans. A special mention goes also to Robert Bailey Jr. as Wybie, and Dawn French and Jennifer Saunders raise a few chuckles playing, rather aptly, a pair of senile old actresses.

In short, Coraline is a triumph in every possible way, there genuinely is very little to criticise about it. It not only does the seemingly impossible and by topping predecessor The Nightmare Before Christmas, but also gains the honour of being the first unanimously brilliant 3D movie.

Colour me impressed.

Steve Wright

****

synecdoche, new york dir: charlie kaufman cast: phillip seymour hoffman, catherine keener, samantha morton out now, 124 mins Synopsis: Fresh from a successful production of Death of a Salesman, theater director Caden Cotard (Hoffman) embarks on his most ambitious production ever. With self-placed stress begining to take its toll on his already troubled personal life, the lines between reality and fiction become blurred beyond recognition.

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s unsung heroes go, Charlie Kaufman is up there with the best of them. His highly anticipated leap from screenwriter to film-maker has been a long one, but within minutes of being plunged headon into this staggering directorial debut, you begin to understand why.

Such patent overindulgence is all too easy to denounce, but with this

much attention to detail and thought it is far more of a wonder than a thing to endure. The play-within-afilm context allows Kaufman to really test his audience, but although this is by far his most daring and provokative work, it is also hugely moving and thoroughly rewarding.

It is difficult to imagine what goes on inside Kaufman's head, in hindsight delving into his psyche would most likely render you a vegetable, albeit an enlightened one. Synecdoche, New York, however, is a truly original and rare cinematic gem, with some fine performances from an accomplished cast, most notably the golden boy of the thinking man's cinema himself, Phillip Seymour Hoffman.

The intense emotion shown by the films central protagonist ultimately leaves you feeling rather cold to his cause, which gives you a much appreciated sense of detatchment. Essentially you appreciate all the complexities of the film, without becomming too involved with its dark and surreal material. It is a little like driving past a burning car; at once unnerving yet totally transfixing and far enough away for you not to be burnt by the flames.

Adam Woodward

*****

film@gairrhydd.com / 51

film

quench's films of the year

film LET THE RIGHT ONE IN Joining the dots between the horror movie, the coming-of-age-tale and the revenge fantasy in hitherto unseen ways, Let the Right One In was almost universally lauded as a landmark vampire flick. It’s greatest strength, however, lies in the compelling relationship (and blossoming romance) at its heart between desperately lonely and chronically bullied Oskar and venerable, blood sucking creature of the night Eli. Beautifully shot, the washed out palette perfectly captures the bleak isolation of the Stokholm suburb that threatens to consume the troubled Oskar. Chilling and heart-warming in equal measure, Let the Right One In might well be one of the films of the decade let alone the year.

Sim Eckstein GRAN TORINO If the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist then the greatest trick Clint Eastwood ever pulled was convincing the Academy that Gran Torino didn’t either. With so much obvious award season fodder floating around at the beginning of 2008, Gran Torino seemed to sneak under the radar. A delicate and thoughtful work about redemption and the dead ended nature of violence it saw Eastwood on top snarling form as a bigoted old curmudgeon.

Garnish that with some of the most creative swearing this side of In the Loop, and you’ve got one of the years best.

Will Hitchins THE WRESTLER The often seedy, often glorious world of low-level professional wrestling would not necessarily seem to be the most fertile of grounds for the most visceral and touching film of the year, yet Aronofsky’s tale of a ex-superstar, washed up, drug addled and estranged from his family should strike a chord with casual fans and smarks alike. Rourke’s portrayal of Randy Ronson is superlative, and the haunting final sequence, soundtracked by The Boss himself will leave you awestruck.

Truly the best film this year.

Ben Marshall

MAN ON WIRE Documentary cinema at its best can be provocative, exhilirating and utterly beautiful, but so rarely is it all of these at once. James Marsh's awe-inspiring tribute to tightrope walker Philippe Petit's seminal highwire performance is not only one of the most stunning documentaries in recent memory, it is a truly unique reflection on what man can achieve when motivated by fascination with the unknown. There are moments in Man on Wire when you have to remind yourself that the footage of Petit scaling New York's skyline is very much real. Balanced with his own reflective and often philosophical narration, this breathtaking cinematic wonder is an uplifting experience which leaves you believing that nothing is impossible.

Adam Woodward MILK Milk is the hugely uplifting biographical story of Harvey Milk and his devotion to gay rights, with a cast verging on perfection and superb characterisation. The beautifully realised direction, alongside the juxtaposition with real documentary footage, creates a transfixing tale that is a wonderful reflection of the struggles for equality, and those who sought to fight against the overtly homophobic values held by so many within America. In a harsh flash of reality, Milk is a testament to how far it is possible to go, the sacrifices we have to make and how we are perhaps no closer than we were 30 years ago to true equality.

Francesca Jarvis HUNGER As directional debuts go, this effort from British artist Steve McQueen is a triumph. Showing no signs of immaturity, Hunger tells the story of the 1981 Irish hunger strike, powerfully depicting the suffering of IRA prisoner Bobby Sands. While much discussion of the film after its release debated whether the film glamorises terrorists, what can't be disputed is the skillful cinematography and awe inspiring performance from Michael Fassbender. Hunger might well be the most provocative and heart wrenching film of the year.

Kyle Ellison

film@gairrhydd.com / 53

film

s c r e e n i c o n s

a fist

full

of

quavers

Ennio morricone 54 / film@gairrhydd.com

T

he film soundtrack hasn’t had the best of times recently. Whether it is assaulted by whatever plinky-plonky indie wussfest that Michael Cera’s dorky face is selling, or Randy Newman farting out more inconsequential feel good Disney guff it seems that Hollywood is committed to transforming the noble art of the film score into nothing more than box-ticking, record-selling banality. Thankfully, there still remains one man committed to creating brilliantly understated, yet equally thrillingly bombastic masterpieces; Ennio Morricone.

Born into a musical lineage, Morricone entered the National Academy of Santa Cecilia in order to take part in a four year Harmony program. Morricone reportedly completed the course in less than half the time; some sources claim he finished in less than six months.

Following this prodigious musical start, Mor-

ricone rejected a lucrative job at Italian broadcasting giant RIA in order to pursue a career as a musical director at RCA. It is these skills he acquired from his time at RCA that forged his early, tentative steps into the world of film scoring, with relatively limited success. It was successful enough, however, to pique the interest of nascent filmmaker, and school friend of Morricone, Sergio Leone.

It is the collaborations between these two luminaries that thrust Morricone into the limelight. Indeed, it was budgetary restraints that forced Morricone to be frugal with his scores; favouring gunshots and whip cracks over pompous and bloated orchestral scores like John Ford had popularised. This stripped down approach matched the seething menace and visceral brutality of Leone’s reimagining of the Old West.

While Morricone would go onto have a fruitful career in film scoring, it would be his work with Leone that would earn him a place in the annals of filmic history. It is no coincidence that when googly-eyed man-child Quentin Tarantino wished to pay tribute to the Spaghetti Western genre in Kill Bill II he was quick to secure the rights to use Morricone’s work in his film. Indeed, so enamoured with Morricone was Tarantino, that were it not for scheduling conflicts, Morricone would be scoring Tarantino’s latest opus, Inglourious Basterds.

It’s not only the realm of film that Morricone inspired, either.

Everybody’s favourite dysfunctional metal jocks Metallica use his epic Ecstasy of Gold to come onto the stage to, and the Ramones frequently used the theme from The Good, The Bad & The Ugly to try and emulate the sense of menace and impending violence that Morricone so skilfully achieved in his works.

Ben Marshall

film

Top 5 Small Screen to Big Screen Movies

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hat with all the 'inspired' and 'original' thinking floating around in Hollywood, you'd be forgiven for forgetting that sometimes movies take inspiration from external sources. And what better source than television? After all it's already like a cinema screen, just a bit smaller. But, the burning question is: what are the Top 5 smallscreen to big-screen movies? Read on...

BEAVIS AND BUTTHEAD DO AMERICA Mike Judge's MTV-generation miscreants hit cinemas in 1996, with the titular duo embarking on a trip across America as they are mistaken for hit-men, get planted with a deadly biological weapon and pursued by the authorities... all because of the search for their stolen TV. The pair's journey from small to big screen saw a vast improvement in their animation, as well as some special guest voices including Bruce Willis and Demi Moore.

Chock-full of their signature stoner humour, the film is a joyous mess to behold, and, if nothing else should be noted for the federal agent who keeps ordering cavity searches on anyone connected with the boys' case, including a coach full of nuns.

STARSKY AND HUTCH This 'Frat-Pack' led reinvention of the popular 1970s cop show may have had its share of misses in the jokes department, but was clearly lovingly crafted to look like its source material. From the big cardigans and the famous red and white Ford Gran Torino to the cardboard box lined alleys of Bay City, it feels authentic. It's worth putting up with Ben Stiller's dumb schtick and Owen Wilson's crooked nose to see Snoop Dogg (clearly having a blast)

as the jive-talking-pimp-informant Huggy Bear, who - if you pay attention - is technically the hero of the film.

MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE The action/thriller franchise was spawned from a 1960s TV series, following the exploits of the embarrassingly titled 'Impossible Mission Force' as they fought off such generic bad guys as sinister dictators and the henchmen of countless evil organisations. Given the glossy bigscreen treatment in 1996, we got to see Tom Cruise dangle around in a room full of lasers and run about looking as confused as the audience as the plot got more and more convoluted. It wasn't until J.J. Abrams rescued the series with the underrated and breathless actionfiesta that is MI:III in 2006 that pride was restored, but the first cinematic outing is still worth a look.

THE FUGITIVE Probably now best known for being 'that film that the Janitor from Scrubs was in', The Fugitive saw the equally craggy features of Harrison Ford and Tommy Lee Jones go head to head, as Ford's wrongly accused doctor tries to prove he didn't kill his wife while on the run from Jones' US Marshal. Based on another 60s TV show, the film

earned 7 Oscar nominations, numerous cultural references and even a piss-poor Leslie Nielsen fronted spoof called Wrongfully Accused.

STAR TREK The current reboot of the insanely popular Sci-fi-soap sees the cardboard cut-out sets replaced by a starship seemingly designed by Apple, while a hip new crew take the controls of the USS Enterprise, boldly going blah blah blah.

Anyway, it's a Trek movie for people who aren't Trek fans, and probably all the better for it; with sumptuous visuals and a uniformly witty cast, it never even stops to take a breath while Kirk and crew warp around space trying to stop a bitter Eric Bana from collapsing whole planets in on themselves. So, it may be lacking some of the entry level subtext of the original series, but it single-handedly makes up for a long, long line of achingly shit films based on the iconic series, and that's quite an accomplishment.

Words - Andy Swidenbank Images - Benjamin Phillips

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film

film news . rumours . conjecture SPIELBERG HAS A DREAM

It seems by the time each new issue roles around, a new high-profile celebrity biopic has appeared on some Hollywood slate. This time the subject is Martin Luther King jr., although the details surrounding the project are already suggesting that this will not be your run of the mill historical hash-up. For a start Steven Spielberg is lined up to produce and the film will be released by Dreamworks, which is co-owned by The Beard. What is most intriguing, however, is that the studio have acquired the rights to all of King's copyrighted books, speeches and works. This will certainly make for a fascinating and factually accurate screenplay, which is a neccessity when dealing with the life of such a historically influential figure. The level of involvement Spielberg will have remains to be seen, but considering his long awaited Abraham Lincoln biopic has been put back recently, he may just have enough time on his hands to get the project underway.

THOR BLIMEY!

With comic-book movies being such huge box office draws these days, casting is always an essential and potentially costly conundrum. The presence of A-list stars can be off-putting (step forward Ben Affleck), but equally, lesser known actors do not have the same pulling power and are often more of a gamble. Marvel's latest and more importantly first self-released big-screen adaptation, however, seems to have got it more or less spot on. Recent reports have named Chris Hemsworth, who recently appeared in Star Trek, as the Norse-god Thor, who is set to appear in several upcoming films, including The Avengers, due out in 2012.

THE DOCTOR WILL SEE YOU, AGAIN

Universal have reportedly green-lit a new Hannibal Lecter film, with Anthony Hopkins set to reprise his role as the psycotic cannibal psychiatrist and Ridley Scott on board to direct. There was speculation that this latest instalment in the franchise might be scrapped, after original Silence Of The Lambs star Jodie Foster bowed out to direct Flora Plum, although Cate Blanchett has been touted as a possible replacement for the role of Clarice Starling.

This will be the forth time the Oscarwinning Welshman will don the famous mask and straight jacket, the last time being 2002's Red Dragon, which received mixed reviews.

this week: special films of the year review

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