Quench - Issue 89

INSIDE:

25% off @ O ld Orleans

albums of 2009

CHRISTMAS PARTY FASHION AND PHOTO TIPS

+ CARDIFF'S SOUNDTRACK FILM FESTIVAL

contents: Issue 89 // Dec 7th - 20nd

THE STUDENT MAGAZINE OF THE YEAR AT 8!

200 RDS AWA DIA GUARDIAN STUDENT ME

VOYEUR ROBBIE BLIND DATE

FILM p. 53

FEATURES GAY FOOD TRAVEL INTERVIEWS FASHION BOOKS

FASHION p. 24

PHOTOS GOING OUT ARTS MUSIC FILM

GOING OUT p. 34 Cover Design: Simon Lucey Cover Photo: Sam Smith

LISTINGS

04 06 07 08 10 12 15 19 24 28 32 36 39 43 53 63

Editor Simon Lucey Executive Editor Emma Jones Assistant to the Editors Elaine Morgan Arts Amelia Forsbrook, Rachel Yates Blind Date Sarah Kilby, Caroline Baldwin Books Emma Pocklington Fashion Emily Cater, Kate Eaton Features Ellie Woodward, Sarah George Film Lloyd Griffiths, Natalie Stone, Steve Wright Food Harriet Davies, Hayley Pyper Gay Lucas Owen Going Out Jack Doran Interviews Jody Tozer, Steve Beynon, Tom Rouse Listings Steve Beynon, Tom Rouse Music Sam Smith, Phil Guy, Si Roach Photos Jake Yorath, Liz Foggitt Travel Dom Kehat, Paul Stollery Podcast Director, Lloyd Griffiths Proof Readers Amelia Forsbrook, Jenny Pearce, Kate Boddington, Martha Partridge, Rebecca Oakley

printed on recycled paper. PLEASE RECYCLE.

voyeur

IN

# wT Penne: slow to bring to a boil

F

or some of us the end of the term isn!t the beginning of festive cheer, nor holiday good will. If like me you have three essays to do in a week, (because you perform best under pressure so therefore it is in your interest to leave it until the last minute) you will fully understand these 250 words. If you haven't got 6,000 words to write in a week, piss off.

With the onslaught of deadlines comes the onslaught of procrastination, and what is evident is that each lazy student has their own way of avoiding work, varying between the mundan, and the crazy all the way through to the downright filthy.

So here it is; my personal top 3 methods of procrastinating to help you broaden your time wasting activities.

Firstly and possibly most obviously is the realm of Facebook. The worry that somebody!s Facebook status might be updated, a photo of you tagged or even somebody write on your wall is reason enough to refresh it every six words throughout your essay. Do not stop refreshing.

My second tactic, is one that may well be unique to me. During times of procrastination I fall in love- regularly.

Whether it is the girl sat opposite me in the library, queuing in the baguette shop at lunch time, or even just walking past my window, I will fall head over heals for them immediately. The cynics amongst you will claim this is a combination of boredom and lust, but they do not see the full picture. I LOVE these people. Do not question it.

My third form of procrastination is more than just one method; it is an entire genre of ways to get out of doing work. I suppose you could call it an entire philosophy, it is aiming to have a !productive day." This is a common one but we all do it in different ways. I"ll apply for jobs that I do not want, tidy my room, hell I even edit a bloody magazine, if that isn!t avoiding work I do not know what is!

SL

04 / voyeur@gairrhydd.com

Penis:

instant satisfaction

ba dom tish

jolly humorous stuff

Pinocchio talks to Gepetto: "Daddy my dick is all jagged and crooked so I have no success with girls."

"You know, my son, I didn!t care too much about that detail, but that should not be a problem. Go to the shop, take a sandpaper and fix it."

After some time, Gepetto asks Pinocchio: "Well, did you resolve the problem with the girls?"

"Daddy, since I got the sandpaper who needs the girls anymore."

dictionary corner on the buzzer with student filth

Alcoplop: The wet post night out discharge, commonly known as the beeriod, that is as pleasurable as it is offensive.

By Joe, this morning's alcoplop is stuck in the U-bend.

voyeur

You ask Chuck Norris the questions ! " # $ % & is whilst I've been having a spiritual cris Life docuwatching David Attenbrough's et full of mentary on BBC. How can a plan there is ly Sure ? nce cha to n beauty be dow struggle more to life than Darwin's simple for survival?

What are your thoughts?

Ernest, 21, Yeovil

e is simThere is no evolution nor God, ther allowed has is Norr ck Chu als ply a list of anim to survive.

Regards, Chuck, life when I It has reached that time in my speak, posam looking for a life plan, so to ided upon sibly a career. My career is dec I like Cardiff go. to re whe w but I do not kno ting, to exci e mor s but everywhere seem Bristol, have more variety, I could go to e what I'm London, even abroad. I suppos the other on ner gree s gras asking is, is the side?

Claire, 22, Cathays

Dave, is slightly For some people the left testicle the right. rs othe for one, r othe bigger than the bigger than For Chuck Norris both testicles are the other one.

Regards, Chuck, and I am a member of Greenpeace ng to taki are you s step t wha d wondere global nter cou help thus save power and warming.

Petal Petal, s his coffee One example: Chuck Norris grind r with his wate the boils then and teeth his with ral. neut on carb ely entir is me sche rage. This Regards,

Claire, other The grass is always greener on the e since ther side, unless Chuck Norris has been s. it'll be drenched in blood and tear Regards, Chuck, question, I have a bit of an embarrassing er than bigg is ls jewe ily fam for one of my you, the the other. I thought I'd come to if this is master of masculinity to find out normal.

Dave, 18, Talybont

s Disclaimer: None of the above view ck Chu of e thos t esen in anyway repr Norris.

voyeur@gairrhydd.com / 05

robbie

It's the last issue of the decade and following in the footsteps of every other publication, Robbie Wells takes a look back at the worst ten years ever... e are little over three weeks away from a new decade, and for that reason, I thought I!d lighten up a bit, stop being so cynical and look back at what has made the noughties great. But then I thought, where!s the fun in that? ! " # $ % & # " ' ( # $ ) * + ' # , ' % - & # % s* # " ) % " # everyone.s biggest fear was some earth shattering, technological Y2K bug, and up until a few weeks back, the biggest fear for most was John and Edward winning X-Factor.

The world has changed a lot in ten years; maybe it.s our overexposure to disaster, war and /terrorism. that makes us apathetic to real issues in favour of spiky haired teens, but our priorities have definitely gone awry somewhere.

The decade began in poor fashion with George W. Bush being elected as the most powerful man on the planet. It seems like a joke that such a character was really the head of the free world, but it happened, as did the wars that seemed like such a good idea at the time. The twin towers, America.s symbol of economic power, were attacked, London was subjected to bombings and New Orleans was the victim of Hurricane Katrina and presidential ineptitude, in what has been a fairly catastrophic ten years all round for the western world. As if it couldn.t get any worse, living lives of greed and debt finally caught us up, (unless you were the guys who ran Enron, in which case karma hasn.t quite got to all of you yet) with the consequence of recession. All the more worrying is that our great saviours from the world

! !

/robbie@gairrhydd.com

of shit that we.re currently in are no doubt going to be the Conservatives.

Can someone please wake me up in 2019 if things are any better?

It.s okay though, because whenever we get a little down about political issues, we can just relax in front of the noughties. greatest creation: reality television. Big Brother hit our screens in 2000 and production companies haven.t looked back since; a cheap, easy and popular way to make programmes, even if it is of the shittest quality. Talentless nobodies are now made in to beings

"In times of social unrest, art is usually at its strongest" of great worth.

The notion that Katie Price can be named as a feminist icon, for essentially taking her kit off in lad.s mags and having sex with footballers is an awful indictment of modern life. The fact that a woman could be made into a celebrity through her inanity in Big Brother, only to be named a rabid racist from appearing on the celebrity version of the same programme, before finally being held up as a wonderful mother, caring person and a martyr after dying from cancer, is even worse. The fickle nature of the public was not lost on Michael Parkinson who received little

support for his frank summation of Jade Goody.

In terms of sport, Wales have won a couple of Six Nations tournaments in the rugby (England won the World Cup in 2003, but no need to rub it in). The Olympics is going to London in 2012, but that.s a success for another decade really, meaning that this decade has, in fact, been quite a failure for sport, too.

It.s all looking a bit bleak in retrospect, but fear not, because artistically we.ve rarely been better. After the low point of Britpop in the nineties, the music produced in the early part of the decade was sensational; The Strokes blending rock and indie for the masses, The Libertines following the trend for the British and hundreds of other acts providing pure sonic genius that are all too many to mention. Movies like Lord of the Rings and The Matrix have proved cult hits, comedy has never been stronger since the greatest sitcom The Office entered our lives and since the Da Vinci Code, even straight-up chavs have been seen reading. Obviously the examples I.ve given can be debated forever, but the fact is, there.s been a wealth of great material, despite the introduction of internet thievery.

In times of social unrest, art is usually at its strongest. Whilst the noughties has much to cause depression, artists have left a legacy that will stand up against the sixties as the most productive ever. And that is the best argument I can put forward for David Cameron to come to power. Here.s to the next decade.

Cheers.

blinddate

Blind Date Did these dates warm to each other on a rainy winter's night, or were they left shivering alone?

"At one point he went to the toilet and I didn't think he was coming back!!"

Alec Best & worst bits?

The company was great, the meal tasty and our waiter surprised us with free desserts! The arrival of the monsoon just as we stepped out of the restaurant!

Were you listening....? Give us a fun fact about your date?

Her Grandad used to work for Guinness.

Describe them in three words?

Entertaining, lovely and interesting Were you nervous? What did you do to get ready?

Nothing that 'Eye of the Tiger' couldn't solve.

So will you be meeting up again?

We'll most probably be meeting over a cup of tea sometime soon!

Did you have a "lorra lorra" laughs together?

Definitely, the time just flew by!

And the infamous chuck, fuck or marry?

Marry, she's a fantastic girl and we got on really well.

Becca Best & worst bits?

The meal was lovely (we even got complimentary ice cream) and I really enjoyed his company, getting soaked on the way back however, not so fun!

Were you listening....? Give us a fun fact about your date?

Has to be one of the hockey tour stories... he had to run through a town with very little on past some boy racers!

Any embarrassing moments?

At one point he went to the toilet and I didn't think he was coming back, turns out he just needed some fresh air.

Describe them in three words?

Intellectual, lovely and funny So will you be meeting up again?

I'm sure we'll have a hot beverage soon.

And the infamous chuck, fuck or marry?

Has to be marry, he'll make someone a very happy lady one day!

Take this exclusive voucher to Old Orleans, 18-19 Church Street to get 25% off your meal throughout December.

ONLY available with this voucher!!

Call 02920 222078

blinddate@gairrhydd.com / 07

features

The Christmas Crunch The assignment deadlines and looming exams are driving us crazy without the thought of Christmas and our ever-dwindling loans to contend with. For a cheap and credit crunch-friendly Christmas time, follow Rosie Martin's lead as she provides a few suggestions that can beat your budget.

08 / features@gairrhydd.com

features

Y

our own shoe, an onion and half a bottle of trumpet oil may not be everyones idea of the perfect Christmas gift, but on unwrapping said items last year I was left feeling satisfied and relieved. By recycling what was essentially bits of random crap from our house, my brothers had stuck to our annual policy of present giving, the bottom line being…just don!t bother. This may be a little on the extreme end of stingeyness but given the state of our various overdrafts, the "just not giving! agreement has become our best option.

"How can we satisfy an entire family's gift quota without sacrificing our dinner/sanity?"

Christmas seems to be an event perpetually !just around the corner".

No sooner has term begun and the toxic smoke settled from bonfire night (no really, our plastic garden set was a victim) and already we"re being bombarded with Christmas displays and seasonal cheer. So it"s no wonder that the old familiar bank account worries creep back into the picture; our nearly maxed out overdrafts suddenly seeming not quite so rosy. So what can we do about it? And how can we satisfy an entire family!s gift quota without sacrificing our dinner/sanity?

Well we don"t all have to go to the extremes of wrapping up each others' shoes. But neither should we join the masses hitting town on a Saturday afternoon and spending a tenner on assorted bath salts and a selection of hand painted buttons (no seriously, just what is that?!). No, there IS another way!

Chris Eccles of Employment for

Students recommends taking out a credit card with a period of 0% interest, advice being available on websites such as E4S.co.uk. By opening up such an account, we can apparently spend without any interest worries for a limited period (in the case of some deals this may stretch up to ten months). But personally, I think this sounds both unnecessary and confusing. My alternative? Arts and crafts!

That"s right, it"s time we return to our primary school years and get back on the homemade gifts wagon, perhaps minus the potato printing. A good starting point might be crafting a calendar for the New Year. For the price of a few sheets of card and some felt tips, you can create a useful present personalised with photos of friends in various poses of non specific student lairiness. Oh what madness. If it"s more presents for friends you"re looking for then there"s always the classic homemade CD compilation – use some of that handy card to make a jazzy case, pad the present out with individually wrapped fruit pastels and Bob"s your uncle.

If the grandparents aren"t so into your trendy hip hop jamboree musical stylings then why not steal some ingredients (from your parents, not the supermarket) and try your hand at jam making. Old people love jam.

Another cheap and easy craft you might fancy is knitting. It"s not just for girls and grannies (real men knit as well) and with a little training from a helpful relative or website, such as Learn-to-knit.com, it can be picked up very easily. Just beware, always use big needles or what should be a few hours worth of scarf-making could turn into a six week long nightmare that only the love of daytime TV will get you through. Believe me, I"ve been there.

The internet is always there to help you out, sites such as Notmadeofmoney.com being particularly useful. On there you!ll find instructions for how to make your own snow globe, kites, bracelets, sock puppets, bookmarks and teddy bears – sifting

through the off cuts in material shops being a good way to cut down on the overall spend. These websites may feature some slightly less appealing options (anyone for an !Altered lunchbox" or !Dishtowel angel"?) but they"re certainly worth checking out if you"re on a serious budget.

"Whatever you create, there's always the added bonus of the personal effort you've put in " But the crafts don"t stop there, no sir. Buy a plant pot and paint it, make chocolate truffles, personalise an old picture frame, bottle your own skittles vodka or create a papier mache bust of your relative"s face - the possibilities are endless. If you"ve never made salt dough then you"re missing out: 2 cups of flour, 1 cup of salt and 1 cup of water creates an ideal base to make room signs, candle holders and weird milkmaid figurines that pensioners like to put on mantelpieces…quite literally anything your heart desires. Whatever you create, be it a success or not, there"s always the added bonus of the personal effort you"ve put in, which most people (unless they"re a bit rubbish) will appreciate far more than some rushed purchase on Christmas Eve. So there you go, a little taster of what homemade presents could do to ease your money worries this festive season. Just a small investment in ingredients – be it arty or edible – and you could be churning your artistic triumphs at a fraction of the price of Ken Dodd"s latest biography. And if all else fails? Just start recycling rubbish from your house - there"s always a place for trumpet oil.

features@gairrhydd.com / 09

gay

It's 11am and Yasmin Nagy is sat on the sofa. Spongebob isn't on for another hour yet, so until then there's American chatshows and an intriguing extended metaphor that equates gay teenagers to Hobnobs. Interested? We thought so.

10 /gay@gairrhydd.com

gay

I

t was late June. I found myself home alone having touched down in the big GB after a 5 month global frolic with my girlfriend. A couple of weeks home and my bowels had readjusted, the novelty of hot showers had passed, and a life of Pad Thai and skydiving had shrivelled back into an extended period of rainy British monotony.

I could not yet face conversing with the Job Centre, so I reached for the remote control and settled down to my Coco Pops; I had decided that a small dose of reality programming was in order before Spongebob at noon, when the sense-offensive screech of Ricki Lake hit me like a smack in the face. I resisted the temptation to flick over as she exclaimed: “Todaaaay we arrre taalking abouwt gaaay teeeens...” . For once it seemed something a little more riveting than Gary, Steve and Ian!s paternity tests. She doesn!t normally hold a candle to Trisha, but I was all ears...

On the show Ricki had a group of kids from a "gay state school! in Manhattan, New York for girls and boys who had experienced homophobic bullying at other schools in the country. "Harvey Milk High School! aims to give oppressed 14- to 18-year-olds a safe environment for learning, where pupils can flourish academically – and the results of the school are astounding.

The concept of the school has been widely applauded and initially I was elated with the whole idea; the kids get to feel included and for once not just part of a minority, and they get equal opportunities to learn without feeling intimidated and harrassed.

But despite these upsides, the concept most definitely has its flaws; it has been argued that this kind of segregation means that people are stepping "back into the closet! (and slamming the door behind them). The school gives a daily illusion of safety and therefore these kids don!t learn how to deal with homophobia in the outside world. It gives the impression that gay people need to be separated from the big wide "hetero! world in order to achieve, and suggests that this fact has been accepted by the

gay community. LGBT people have protested against the school, arguing that if there are establishments that identify people purely on sexual orientation, then we can never expect that tolerance and inclusion will ever become natural. Will these kids even know how to communicate with straight people?

The danger is that, with too much time spent away from mainstream society, they may come to think that all straight people are against them - that only gay people could understand them - and may even start to see straight people as equally freakish specimens (and nobody likes that). It!s exactly the kind of discrimination which they want to get away from. Having been conditioned to a gay-only life, the adults that emerge may be just as bigoted as their own homphobic tormentors?

It may be possible within such

"I could not yet face the Job Centre, so I reached for the remote control..." schools to maintain an education which tries to represent all members of society as equal; but perhaps at a young age when a person is deciding who they want to be (not just sexually) they should be surrounded by as many different kinds of people and different types of situations as possible, in order to become it naturally.

Without undermining the importance of this issue, try to imagine that up until now the only biscuit you!d ever, ever tried was The Hobnob (and as almighty as The Hobnob is, I!m sure you wouldn!t wish that on anyone). You are familiar only with the texture, character, assets and strengths of The Hobnob. One day you step out into the big wide world and somebody offers you a Bourbon – lets face it, you!d crap yourself. You wouldn!t know what to do with it; you wouldn!t be able to comprehend the crumbly fragility of the Bourbon in

comparison to the robust nature of your old friend The Hobnob. You!d submerge it in your tea for three times the designated period, then spatter fragments of speckled rusk juice all over your face. Your tea would be tarnished and useless, and the Bourbon would taste perverse and alien; it would be nothing like The Hobnob, and you would have never even known it existed; your entire relationship with confectionary goods would be hindered by a distinct lack of experience in the biscuit field.

What I mean to say is that we should throw all our different biscuits in the biscuit tin (and share them around) in case we never learn how diverse the biscuit world really is (apologies for the preposterous metaphor). In a vaguely similar way, I think that should gay schools become the norm then society could easily become complacent, and use such segregation as an excuse to abandon gay rights in the mainstream.

In terms of education there is a fine line between solving the problem of homophobic discrimination, and completely avoiding it by "saving! the kids from bullying.

Most people would have had a pretty shitty time being the only gay in the playground; the fact is that homophobia does exist in schools and it shouldn!t; tackling the source head-on would be a more effective way of reducing it than just removing those kids in the firing line. The main agenda should be to raise public awareness and to attempt to change the views of the people that discriminate against minority groups, so that the narrowminded ones are the ones segretated. Even though right now the kids at Harvey Milk High are better off, in the long term it is likely to increase problems.

The concept of "gay schools! is a huge area of debate, and you would need about twenty dissertations to cover just a tiny portion of it. The reason why I was banging on about Ricki Lake and monotony at the start was because I don!t think this kind of issue should be introduced as "BIG SCARY GAY STUFF!; it should be discussed with just as much normality as Job Centres, sofas and cereal.

gay@gairrhydd.com / 11

food

Treat your tastebuds this

Christmas

Photos: Laura Finney

That time of year has come round again...and although our cupboards and wallets are bare, we don't have to break the bank to enjoy an indulgent Christmas! Why not treat your housemates with some of these culinary delights to kick of the festive season?

Chocolate Truffles

Celebration Ice Cream

Christmas Pud Cupcakes

100g high cocoa % dark chocolate 100g good quality milk chocolate 2 tbsp unsalted butter 175ml double or whipping cream cocoa powder/icing sugar for dusting

150g currants 125ml port 4 large eggs " tsp salt 200g sugar 125ml water 100g shelled walnuts (roughly chopped) 50g chopped candied peel 50g glacé cherries (roughly chopped) 250ml double or whipping cream

50g Dark Chocolate 140g Butter 3 Eggs, lightly beaten 140g Self-Raising Flour 140g Caster Sugar 100g Ground Almonds 6 tbsp Cocoa Powder 1 tsp Baking Powder 250g Icing Sugar, 1 tsp Custard Powder, sifted 12 small bay leaves Cherries or Skittles for topping

1. Heat port and currents to simmering point then leave to cool.

2. Whisk eggs and salt until frothy.

3. Boil sugar with water for 3 minutes to make syrup.

4. Immediately pour syrup slowly on eggs while whisking at high speed, (ideally electric whisk) Put hot bowl in sink of cold water and stir. Whip cream until thick but not stiff.

5. Stir the currants, port, nuts, and cherries into the cooled egg mixture and fold in whipped cream.

Transfer to a container and freeze.

1. Heat oven to 190C or Gas 5.

Grease muffin tray.

2. Melt chocolate and butter. Cool mixture and add eggs.

3. Mix flour, sugar, almonds, cocoa and baking powder. Pour in chocolate and stir until smooth.

5. Spoon mixture into muffin holes- ! full. Bake (20 mins).

Leave to cool.

6. Mix icing sugar and custard powder with 2 tbsp of warm water 7. Remove the muffins from the tins and cut off any rounded tops.

Stand the muffins upside-down and spoon over the icing and decoration.

Hayley Pyper

1. Melt chocolate in a bowl with butter 2. Take chocolate off the heat and leave to cool for a few minutes 3. Slowly stir cream into melted chocolate 4. Leave mixture to cool in fridge for 2 hours 5. Scoop out clumps of the stiff chocolate mixture and roll in cocoa powder or icing sugar (make truffles whatever size and shape you like) Harriet Davies

Jasmine Joynson

12 /food@gairrhydd.com

food

Christmas grub across the globe Harriet Davies looks beyond turkey and mince pies and investigates the culinary Christmas customs of other cultures

W

hen I think about Christmas these days, I mostly think about food (and avoid looking at my bank balance). I look forward to coming home from uni and pretty much stuffing my face for two weeks whilst getting quietly smashed with elderly relatives…and it!s okay to do that, because it!s Christmas.

For most of us, Christmas dinner involves something along the lines of turkey, stuffing, bread and cranberry sauce, pigs in blankets, maybe a few parsnips and the odd brussel sprout – all of which is preceeded by days and days of amazing sandwiches.

However, with the exception of our dear friend the USA, most other countries have completely different customs with food when it comes to celebrating Christmas. To name a few…

In Finland Christmas Eve is the most important day for food festivities. For breakfast, rice porridge and a soup made from dried fruits is eaten, followed by vegetable and liver casserole as the main Christmas meal in the evening. They also love eating various pickles, cold fish salads, and peas.

In Germany the main Christmas meal is eaten on Christmas day, and usually consists of carp or goose.

Presents are opened on Christmas eve.

In Hungary both presentswapping and Christmas dinner takes place on Christmas eve, and usually includes fresh fish with rice or potatoes and homemade pastries for dessert.

In Latvia the main Christmas meal is eaten on Christmas day and consists of bacon and sausages, brown peas, cabbage, and small pies. Odd.

In Australia they chuck a couple !o shrimps on the barby mate.

In Portugal the main meal is eaten at midnight on Christmas Eve and includes salted dry cod with boiled potatoes. I wonder if they know that eating late at night is bad for metabolism…

In Romania the Christmas meal is eaten on Christmas day and consists of stuffed cabbage made two days in advance. Yummy.

In Brazil most of the Christmas customs are similar to ours, except their Christmas dinner usually consists of chicken or turkey, ham and rice, served with salad, fruit and beer.

So if you're bored of the standard poultry this year...why not try a bit of fish? or maybe some small pies?

Hmm...maybe not.

Fancy a Tipple???

Mulled Wine

Mulled Cider

1 bottle red wine 60g/2oz demerara sugar 1 cinnamon stick 1/2 grated nutmeg 1 orange, halved 1 bay leaf (optional) 1. Pour wine in saucepan with the orange, sugar, bayleaf and spices. add 1 cup of water.

2. Heat gently until the sugar has dissolved. Taste to see if you want the wine sweeter, and add more sugar to taste.

1 bottle cider 60g/2oz demerara sugar 1 cinnamon stick

1/2 grated nutmeg 1 orange, halved 1. Pour cider in saucepan with the orange, sugar, bayleaf and the spices.

2. Heat gently until the sugar has dissolved. Taste to see if you want the cider sweeter, and add more sugar to taste.

food@gairrhydd.com / 13

travel IN F BRITA BEST O

. . .Portmeirion In the middle of nowhere, amongst the hills of North Wales, exists a village built for the sole purpose to astound, confuse and amuse. Marc Thomas takes a visit and loses himself in the surrealist dream that is Portmeirion.

A

four-foot statue of the Buddha, a concrete boat masquerading as the real thing and Palm trees on Christmas Day. One could be fooled into believing that your in Las Vegas.

In fact, we!re talking about North Wales - Portmeirion, to be exact.

It!s Wintertime, it!s Britain and you!re in the strangest town on the planet. Home to cult TV show "The Prisoner,! which was recently remade for television, Portmeirion is the secret paradise that everyone wants you to know about.

Back in 1925, Clough Williams-Ellis began work on what he believed to be an !ideal site." Ellis finished his work in 1975, having spent half a century modelling and landscaping, heavily inspired by the Italian villagio style.

Walking around the village will make you feel as if you!ve fallen down the rabbit hole – and with the bizarre atmosphere surrounding it, don!t be surprised if you suddenly feel ten feet tall. The buildings of the village appear to be much taller than they really are. Ellis intentionally made the tops of the cottages smaller than the foundations to mess with our heads and really give the feeling

that visitors have been transported from the often-dull surroundings of Snowdonia into an exotic dream by the sea.

Were it not for the ice-cold temperatures of the Northern winter or the lack of native Italians, it would be nigh on impossible to tell the difference – but that was exactly the idea for the architect.

"Walking around the village will make you feel like you've fallen down the rabbit hole" If the odd proportions aren!t enough to completely disorientate you, the veritable labyrinth of little pathways permeating the grounds will certainly compensate. One moment, you could be perfectly sure where you are and a minute later you!ve walked 100 metres

face-to-face with a giant Buddha, or stumbled upon a frozen lake made for skimming stones or perhaps a Chinese pagoda in the middle of nowhere – perfectly serene, absolutely safe.

Here is another strange thing about the Portmeirion: there is a never-ending stream of discovery.

Surrounded by gardens and forestry, you can wander freely but you may find yourself losing track of time as you find something that you have never seen before. Even people who have been to the village several times find new things on each visit.

Unless you!re a dedicated hiker on a tour of Wales, you!ll need a car to get to the village: there are no major train stations around. For a one-day ticket into the village expect to pay £7.50 for an adult ticket or £6 with a concession. If you!re not into long drives sandwiching a day of sightseeing, you could always rent one of the cottages or get a room in one of the two hotels in the village.

Annoyingly you'll have to part with most of your student loan to do that, but as a day trip, undoubtedly worth the money.

travel@gairrhydd.com / 15

travel

PARTY ISLAND

This week, Claire Finnegan travels to Ibiza and discovers the darker side of the party island. Working with prostitutes, strippers and drug addicts, she helps the people partygoers have forgotten.

16/travel@gairrhydd.com

travel

W

hen emailing home from the backstreets of San Antonio to tell my parents that the best part of the trip had been the prostitutes and strippers, you would not have thought they would have been best pleased. But they were so proud of me.

That's because, amongst getting a tan, watching epic sunsets and raving, I was also in Ibiza with a charity24-7 Ibiza, which exists to help both workers and tourists on that beautiful island.

We spent a lot of time shipping people safely back to their hotels in our free minivan and wheelchair, since most taxis won't take people home if they think they'll throw up.

However, it's really important they do get home, because if you're left confused or unconscious in San An's West End, theft and rape are a very real danger, regardless of gender.

We would walk about the busy streets, chatting with PRs – many of them frustrated because they are only paid commission, so live off free packets of ketchup for weeks on end... but while we chat with PRs, we're also looking out for people alone or in need of a lift. We came accross one man who was covered in every bodily fluid known to man.

It was really sad to see, though – the poor guy saying over and over “I'm a disgrace”, while we wheelchaired and minivanned him home, trying to reassure him we weren't out to judge him. Of course, there were times when it all went Pete Tong (who, incidentally, was DJing on The Island while we were there), but, like I say, it's not all polished – semiconcious people can be very abusive although most people were unbelievably grateful.

For example, one guy we met, Josh, who worked in a bar, used to the drink and the drugs that were commonplace in Ibiza. He had had a bad reaction to ketamine and his friend Rob wasn't being much help.

“Leave him be!" he shouted at us, "It's his own fault, he doesn't deserve help.” But that's not the point.

So we spent a couple of hours stroking Josh's back while he vomited whilst thanking us repeatedly, until he was sober enough to go home. While

all this was going on, a guy shouted at us “I paid twenty Euro for (a certain lap-dancing club), and didn't see a single cunt!”

It was easy at times to feel you weren't making a difference. I will always remember one particular night, when we ran into a prostitute we knew, Seren. Her fragile palm was grasped by a steroid-pumped man saying “you'd better make it good”. It really hit home what actually goes on out there.

I just went home and cried that night. However, we wanted to care for these people with the same love we believe God's treated us with, no matter what an impossible situation it might seem. Not much else could motivate me to clean crap off a minivan!

"My experience was truly eye opening, fun and valuable.

I'll definitely be going back" When we weren't working, we partied lots. My favourites clubs were 'Space', where the beats were so heavy that our noses ran; and 'Bora Bora', a beach party on Playa d'en Bossa, which we went to in brilliant sunshine.

But I still think some of the best nights to be had are actually in the winding, grimy, cramped streets of San Antonio's West End. Entrance is generally free, the upcoming DJs work intensely to produce that beautiful Balearic sound, drinks offers abound, and the atmosphere is much more friendly than the bigger clubs.

We had to pay to do the charity stuff to cover various costs but I think my time there was well worth it; it was eye-opening, fun and valuable. I'd definitely go back. Because of costs, we stayed in a pretty basic hotel, but we were happy with the jolly Spanish staff, swimming pool and classic

Ibiza flat-sofa room. But that's just the setting. The real plot of any story is always about the people.

I have said that my favourite bits were meeting prostitutes and strippers, but their tales were the most heartbreaking. As for the strippers, I met one called Ffion, wearing nothing but scraps of duct tape, and her friend Kirsty, who said she equally hated and wasn't bothered by all the leery men, who seemed to think women were everything and nothing.

She also told me she was running away from a strict religious home, where she felt trapped and was made to feel bad about herself and ashamed of everything, so it was interesting talking to her about how my religious belief had done the exact opposite for me.

Most people that aren't using the prostitutes avoid them or give them verbal abuse. I remember wheelchairing a guy home one night, and his friend shouting at them “He's in a wheelchair, and you still wanna give him a blow job, you dirty sluts”.

The prostitutes' lives seemed so up and down. I remember seeing Emily and Seren at the 24-7 Ibiza centre the asking for condoms the night after we had seen them on the streets.

We then saw Seren with Mr. Steroid the next night, and then them being in the centre again the next day, asking for bibles, and for people to pray with them – for a way to leave their work.

Despite all the tragedy and some serious issues rearing their ugly heads (and I've only scratched the surface), Ibiza still remains one of my favourite places on earth. With its vibrant cocktail of chilled people and gorgeous clubs, it will always be an amazing place to party. But if you look hard enough at the faces in the crowds, you'll see that each one has a story to tell.

Party hard. Party safe. And who knows, maybe you'll meet your very own versions of Josh, Rob, Emily, Seren, Ffion, Kirsty.............

For more info see www.24-7prayer. com/blog/1080 or www.24-7ibiza. com *For the purposes of confidentiality, false names have been used.

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interviews going out

the new voice of radio?

Jody Tozer spends a day star-spotting at BBC HQ and manages to ask Greg James a few questions while she's at it (and break into the Live Lounge)

S

at in the foyer of the building that is the hive of radio one activity, we did some DJ spotting.

I had been invited to the Radio One broadcasting house, along with Luke Franks, Xpressradio.co.uk DJ, to interview the lovely Greg James.

There is, however, one problem with DJ spotting: with these people being on the radio, you are quite unfamiliar with what these people actually look like. “Is he someone famous? Oh no,

that’s the security guard.”

We didn!t have to wait long for our first celebrity sighting. The lifts opened and burly men stepped out no doubt protecting some massively impressive celebrity, to which we weren!t disappointed. What I can only describe as driving out of the lift, was none other than "Mini Me!, a.k.a. Verve Troyer. He wheeled along on his little vehicle and as he passed, you could hear murmurs of “Oh my, isn!t he small!” He was then

greeted by a huddle of paparazzi.

The mistakenly famous security guard offered us some milkshakes he had been given for free as he halted the guy who had just walked past him. “Have you got your pass?”

Brilliant; some drama. “Er no, but I!ve got to do my show in like 5 minutes”.

Radio one website stalking had helped me to recognize that this character was no crazed loony trying to gain entry to the broadcasting

interviews@gairrhydd.com /19

interviews

i am new to a lot of people and that is exciting

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interviews

house; it was Scott Mills.

“I recognize him”, I piped up.

“Thanks a lot! And hi…” He waved, and carried on. I like to think he wouldn!t have got in without me that day, dead air reigning radios nationwide. This is what I shall tell my grandchildren, anyway.

When the time for the interview arrived, we were led down to the studios, celebrity memorabilia adorning their walls. We walked into one of the studios and sat down at one of the DJ decks that many a presenter has put their hand to.

What comes out of Xpress Luke!s mouth next shocked us all; “You!re better looking in real life!” The DJ awkwardly thanked my heterosexual companion and shuffled in his seat.

"No one wants to come in at 4 o’clock in the morning" Winner of the best male presenter at the student radio awards, Greg was given the opportunity to record a 1 hour show that would be aired during a night of broadcasting on Radio One. We asked him what kind of content budding presenters should include in their showreels for such awards.

“I just put in what I thought was my best stuff. I had only been on air for three months, so there wasn!t much to choose from. I!d made quite a few demos for other radio stations, including a parody song about the head of technical stuff at the station, using the Athlete song, Wires. I wanted to use something that would stand out”.

So Radio One had given him the opportunity to shine and then invited him to present the 4.00am – 6.30am early morning shift five times a week.

“I think they needed someone

new and I fitted what they wanted, so they took a chance on me. It happened very quickly – the student radio awards were vital and I!m proud to have come from student radio”. Asking Greg how he coped with doing a shift that was essentially in the dead of night, he explained that it was tricky to sort out his social life and his health, having to sleep in two shifts to cope with the bizarre schedule. What comes across at this point is how much Greg doesn!t want to moan about this and is very grateful to have had the breakfast show. After braving the graveyard shift, Greg was then given the daytime slot of 1 – 4pm in a shake up of the scheduling taking over from Edith Bowman.

“I see this as another beginning really, another start, an opportunity for me to start again and build up another audience. I!m new to a lot of people and that!s exciting. I want to make it a better show but with the whole spirit of my early morning show and more famous guests - or just some guests as no one wants to come in at 4 o!clock in the morning…”

So now Greg had the opportunity to actually have some guests, he told us that Ricky Gervais had been his favourite so far, naturally leads us to the question: did he try to outfunny the famous comedian?

“That!s the mistake a lot of people have made. I just thought I!d sit there and ask him some intelligent-ish questions and let him go, because that!s what people want to hear, not me, some knob trying to out-funny him, "cos it!s not going to work.”

At this point Zane Lowe walks in - it seems we had stolen his studio.

We relocate to the live lounge where we get a little bit excited.

We!re alone in the live lounge, and of course the camera comes out.

The flash goes off, and we stare directly ahead fresh from grinning into the camera lens, only to meet the gaze of Scott Mills behind the perspex window in the next studio.

He looks at us with a facial expression, which is that of considering whether to contact security, or not.

Fortunately, Greg walks in to justify

our existence in the famous studio.

“Thrown out by Zane, now that!s show business!” Greg declares as he walks in unaware of our misbehavior.

"I have some tramps outside my flat, maybe they are fans!”

“We!ve been stalking you a bit and see you have a long term girlfriend. Are there many other disappointed stalkers out there?”

“I don!t know, maybe! There was a bloke who tried to get in the VIP area once who came up to me and was trying to get me to say he was my mate so that he could stay. A girl named her cat after me as well”, We tell Greg that we have noticed that any stalkers could easily wait outside the broadcasting house –not us of course, or that we!ve thought this through carefully at all.

He ponders this.

“Yeah they could. I have some tramps outside my flat, maybe they are fans!”

Greg had previously been a continuity announcer for Dave TV back in the days of the early morning show. Due to a reshuffle caused by Dave running out of money, Greg was offered a bigger workload, which he just didn!t have the time for, resulting in him severing all his ties with Dave.

But now the future was Daveless, did Greg feel like he had made it to the top of his game? “I!ve got higher aspirations, I think it would be silly not to. There would be something wrong with you if you didn!t want to present breakfast or drive time one day, but I!m so happy and fortunate to be here.”

Don't forget to check out Greg's show between 1 and 4pm every weekday on Radio 1!

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goinginterviews out

BRAKES

BRAKES

BRAKES

BRAKES Jon Berry discusses politics and porcupines with Brakes, while simultaneously attempting to avoid claustraphobia.

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interviews going out

F

ive years since their initial inception, borrowing members from both British Sea Power & Electric Soft Parade, Brakes have established themselves as a band with both a ferocious live presebce and top quality song writing. Combining the above with a knack for contemporary social criticism, albeit done in a somewhat tongue in cheek matter, results in a band whose extraordinary talent belies the intimacy of the venues they play.

I was lucky enough to catch up with Eamon Hamilton & Alex White, songsmith & beat maestro respectively, prior to their recent show at Clwb Ifor Bach to talk politics, porcupines & pineapples. All in the complete and utter darkness of their tour van. It was a rather interesting experience.

You!ve been out of the country on tour for some time. Has it taken you a while to reacclimatise?

AW: “I don!t think I have. When we got back from the US, the clocks went back. So with that, all the driving and the jetlag I think I slept for about 24 hours when I got back. Lost a whole day.”

EH: “Yeh, it!s so cold over here now. The last shows we played were in LA, which was crazy enough, but then flying straight back, it took some time. This is our first show back in the UK, it!s going from one extreme to the other.”

But you enjoyed the experience?

EH: “We always do. We seem to go down really well over there, especially around Nashville” (where the band recorded their 2006 opus, Beatific Visions).

AW “You really get a feel for the vastness of the place. Driving all day and night from the middle of Omaha to Salt Lake City it!s pretty

hard work. It!s kinda nice to be back here where everything!s relatively concentrated.”

So, "Rock is Dodelijk!, the album. What prompted you to release a live album?

AW: “We just wanted a distillation of our live sound, to keep it pure, for people who may not have had the chance to see us. We didn!t want a shitty, over-produced representation, it just wouldn!t have worked for us. I mean on the album there are a few cock-ups, a few issues with lyrics, I fucked up a drum thing, but it!s real, it!s how we sound when you come to see us.”

“I think most of us are generally thinking about Bush.”

And "Dodelijk!? Deadly yeh?

Do you think music is a deadly thing?

EH: “It!s kind of an inside joke between the band. Every time we!d go to Holland, on the cigarette packets over there they have "roken is dodelijk! which means smoking is deadly, so it!s kind of a play on words around that. The Dutch have such a good sense of humour and they're so well versed in English. it means their linguistic comedy is really great.”

So you go down well over on the continent?

AW: “Yeh, they seem to really enjoy the songs, they really get into it live, there are a lot of undercurrents in the songs that people can pick up on easily, so there!s not so much of a cultural focus.”

I see what you mean, the

songs seem to have a subtle, but very definite political slant. Is this a conscious choice?

AW: “I don!t think it is necessarily a choice really, it!s just that when you're surrounded by all these things going on you absorb a lot, and to write a song is a really healthy way to channel it.”

EH: “I think that for a band to say they!re political really pigeonholes them. It!s just a natural process.

Like one day I may be thinking about Bush, so I!ll write a song about Bush.”

AW: “I think most of us are generally thinking about Bush.”

EH: “Yeh, in one form or another."

You!ve been quite prolific with your tour schedules & releases, does this give you any time to do anything with either of your previous outfits?

AW: Well I still do some work with ESP. We!re working on the next album, so that!s coming along slowly, but this is where the majority of our time is concentrated. Tom (White, guitar) does some stuff with Patrick Wolf, but when Eamon left BSP that was a clean break.

EH: “Now I can concentrate all my song-writing abilities into this.”

Ok, so just one final question for you: Porcupine or Pineapple?

AW: “The thing about that is, because I was thinking about it recently, is that it isn!t really a question, it!s a choice, it!s the answer to the previous question in the song (that being "Who won the war? What the fuck was it for?!). If you look at it, and look at the context of the song as a whole I think it becomes clear.

But for the sake of argument I think I!d have to say pineapple, because we have one upstairs EH: “I!m gonna say porcupine.”

Well that!s band diplomacy for you!

interviews @gairrhydd.com /23

fashion

Festive Fashion Get

Photography by Oliver Franklin Make up by Rachael Nelmes Clothes by Seren, Morgan Arcade, Cardiff.

Models: Holly Reece and Rachel Cunningham Location: Cardiff Arts Institute.

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fashion

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fashion

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fashion

Party In

Style Party season is finally upon us, so make a fashion statement with luxe fabrics and textures, sparkly accessories, embellishments and graphic shapes... It's time to shine!

C

hristmas is a time of fashion dilemmas: what to wear for a work do? Family dinner? The long-awaited New Year's Eve party? Joy to the world, the season trends are in!

Go wild with fur! No matter whether its dappled grey, or classy 1920s cream, fur is everywhere. Fur is also big in more ways than one, so if you're worried about being swamped, wear a jacket, not coat, and accessorize with a waist belt. Alternatively if you've had one too many mince pies, remove your

"Show your Christmas tree how it's done and sparkle in sequins" belt, and let the fur hide all.

Show your Christmas tree how it's done and sparkle in sequins. The catwalk brought us antique gold worn with ladylike pastels and disco indigo worn with big shoulders and a big attitude. Sequins are stunning for your New Year's night out.

Purple. A colour oozing decadence and royalty.

A statement alternative to the LBD, comes in the form of winters variation of the maxi-dress bringing full length glamour. For a simple splash of colour, accessorize in vibrant hues of violet, magenta and cerise.

A seasonal must have: the Snood. Umbrellas don't stand the wind, and waterproofs are bulky to carry. Enter the snood, a scarf with hood that's guaranteed to be this seasons must-have to save your day stylishly.

Look to Seren boutique in Morgan Arcade for a dazzling array of party dresses and essentials.

Prices range from £75-£300.

Lucy Trevallion.

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books

.ODE .TO .WALES.

On the 14th and 15th of November the Wales Millenium Centre held a series of landmark celebrations to commemorate the opening of the centre. Quench sends Judith Dray and Chris Humphery to reveiw the highlights.

A

s part of the celebrations commemorating ten years of the Welsh Assembly Government, Gillian Clarke and Ceri Wyn Jones performed a poetry reading in the Senedd, Cardiff Bay. They each performed a new work written especially for the occasion on the theme of ten years of devolution, alongside relevant existing poems.

'Take winter by the throat!'

Gillian Clarke was keen to express her enthusiasm and affection for the Senedd. ‘Slate, Oak, Glass’, a poem which she wrote earlier this year, focusing on the role of nature in architecture. This seemed appropriate given that the Senedd was designed with sustainability in mind and constructed using traditional Welsh materials such as slate and Welsh oak. Her new poem, celebrating the tenth anniversary, was entitled ‘Small Blue Butterfly’, drawing on the idea that ‘a butterfly can start an avalanche’ and possibly suggesting hope for growth in the future of the Welsh Assembly. She reminisced about visiting Cardiff Docks as a child with her father and pointed out that the area the Senedd now stands upon used to be a natural area and

28 /books@gairrhydd.com

full of wildlife. She expressed the bitter disappointment she felt when Wales voted against the devolution referendum in 1979 but contrasted this with the joy she felt in 1997 when her hometown of Camarthen was the deciding unitary authority in voting ‘yes’ to the Welsh Assembly.

She remarked upon the satisfaction that Wales could take responsibility for itself or, as she put it, could blame Lord Dafydd Elis-Thomas who presided over the event. Overall, it was refreshing to hear a poet who is an optimist.

What the poets said was poignant and remarkable. Their new poems were apt and inspirational, marking the day with a sense of optimism for the future and a contentment over what has already been achieved.

Judith Dray

A

fter a warm welcome, Gillian Clarke prepared to read a poem she’d been asked to write especially for the upcoming event; Daring members of the public were about to sing a scratch version of Beethoven’s ‘Ode to Joy’.

The performance, part of the Millennium Centre’s open weekend, celebrated the Centre’s fifth birthday.

Gillian spoke passionately about her pride for the event, “I’m grateful to Wales, grateful to the Centre and grateful to the public”. With emotion in her voice, the message was really

quite touching. And then, finally, the National Poet of Wales started to read an Ode of her own.

'And then the public began to sing' She began the poem in an elegiac mood; Clocks suppressed the sunlight and animals hid in their burrows; Leaves fell from the trees, a metaphor for the poet’s recent loss.

But from the shadows of these initial stanzas grew a new hope as the mood twisted towards our strength.

She demanded an assertive defiance of the year’s harshest season, “Take winter by the throat!” Joy began to echo between her words as she spoke of the flare of approaching spring. “Feed the common bird” she recited, ‘Let us praise the darkness’. As the short poem reached its closing lines, the semantics turned to celebrations whilst the theme of Beethoven’s Ode still flowed along the poet’s vocal margins; ‘Turn up the music, Pour us a glass, And in this theatre of winter, Sing away the dark’ she read, as applause venerated the eloquent performance and the public began to sing.

Chris Humphery

books

Discovering a Comet and more micro-fiction Pub: Leaf Books

W

e have been told that as our free time becomes more pressurised, short stories will soon become the most popular form of fiction. Based on the evidence presented by this collection of micro-fiction

Dancing with Delsie and more poems Pub: Leaf Books

D

ancing with Delsie and Other Poems is the sixth anthology from local publishers Leaf Books and a broad spectrum of poetic styles. With a range of blank verse, free verse and even snappy little haikus, this

Ada and more nano-fiction Pub: Leaf Books

A

da and other nano-fiction is the first nano-ficton anthology from leaf books, consisting of stories of one hundred words of less. If you thought that you couldn’t fit a complete story in to a mere one hundred words then this anthology will resolutely prove you wrong. Not only are the

however, that will probably not be the case.

That’s not to say the stories are not good of course. They are exceptional.

The collection portrays a fantastically varied cross-section of creative life in just 36 pages of story telling.

Green Light discusses sexuality, whereas Discovering a Comet mulls over how to humanely trap a small comet that has been shoved through your letterbox.

The Factory for Other People’s Happiness is simply told, but has a powerful and despairing message, whereas Heirloom Quality left me unsure whether to laugh or knit my brow in confusion.

Because the stories only last a

page however, it is very difficult to feel sympathy, or hate or love for any of the characters. Almost as soon as they have arrived onto your page, they have gone and the next story begs your attention.

Perhaps that is why the most effective stories in this collection are the ones that are funny, or contain one line that etches itself onto your brain.

The collection is a great distraction and would fit nicely into a busy day, but it is perhaps best to read this only so as to familiarise yourself with these talented, emerging writers so you know whether to spend your money on their longer projects.

Andrew Papworth

collection contains an engaging variety of high-quality poetry from a cohort of talented British writers.

The essence of the anthology is captured in Sally James’ poem, which, despite being a runner-up, gives the collection its name. ‘Dancing with Delsie’ is a lively description of two dancing friends – the narrator and Delsie, who uses a wheelchair.

The cyclic movement of the chair’s wheels is reflected in the poem’s tornado-like form and the swirling momentum, brought on by the lack of punctuation, encapsulates the changing moods of the poetry collection.

The merriment of ‘Dancing with Delsie’ is offset by the isolation

evoked by competition-winner Eloise Williams in her poem ‘I do’. Depicting the ostracism of a German woman in post-war South Wales, Williams’ cold poem suggests that historic enmity will resonate in a small community.

Among poems focussing on family history, technology, innocence, motherhood, colonialism and more, Jonathon Pinnock’s cheeky ‘Pants Outside Trousers, Big Letter H On T Shirt, Here To Save The World’ stands out as a highlight. His lighthearted mish-mash of genres is a microcosmic picture of the face of 21st century poetry.

Rosie Burrows

stories coherent, they are often moving, funny and highly thought provoking.

The anthology contains over seventy stories, some of which deal interestingly with small everyday stories and some which tackle much bigger issues. Holly Atkinson’s Written on the Wall sums up the creation and the breakdown of a relationship and Chloe Bank’s Things to do before Breakfast tells of a woman saving the world and being late for work.

The sheer brilliance of compacting narratives into such tiny pieces of writing often amazes.

What’s more is that these pieces are from established and amateur writers alike; students, administra-

tive officers and published authors all come together in this anthology to show off their skills. It is not clear even at a second inspection who are the veterans and who are not, the standard of work is so high.

Nano-fiction is a new and fascinating form of writing and it has been brilliantly exhibited here

by Leaf Books. I for one eagerly await the result of the Teeny Weeny Fiction competition. Ada and other nano-fiction proves that great things really do come in the smallest of packages.

Emma Pocklington

books@gairrhydd.com/29

Leaf Books

books

Emma Pocklington explores the unappreciated genius that is small time Welsh publishers Leaf Books on the upcoming release of their writers magazine.

F

or many twenty somethings and terrified postgrads interested in becoming writers, the question is where to start. It’s all very well loitering in Starbucks with an expensive notebook producing masterpieces, but what do you do with it once it’s finished?

The answer? Submit it to a Leaf Books competition. Leaf Books is an independent publishers from

'What do you do with your novel when you've finished it? The answer? Submit it to Leaf Books' the Welsh Valleys specialising in publishing works from new and established writers alike.

Leaf was started in 2005 by Cecilia Morreau. She and another writer were looking for ways to get short stories published by new and emerging writers. They felt it was hard to break into the publishing market and that there was a need for an independent publisher that was not beholden to the big publishing houses or agents. They went down the route of holding competitions as that was the only way to fund their independant status. They found it was a good way for new and

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unpublished writers to begin their publishing CV. At first they published pocket-sized books each with one short story but then they found that their anthologies were more popular and now concentrate on those.

Since its beginning Leaf has launched a website, published numerous anthologies, held writing events and put around three hundred writers to print. Leaf is particularly appropriate for original and vibrant poetry, short stories, and other experimental types of writing.

Leaf is now one of the worlds leading micro-fiction publishers, producing collections of fresh and exciting work in every genre and for every age group.

As well as anthologies Leaf produce mini books and have an online Showcase site. The mini books are pocket-sized short stories written

by local and international authors alike and designed to be read in one sitting, in cafes, in waiting rooms and on buses. The Showcase site is Leaf’s online branch of publishing for the more experimental forms of fiction such as Postcard writing, which is currently on display. Judging is currently underway for the Blog Post competition and the Teeny Weeny Fiction competition which invited participants to send either a piece of writing under 140 characters including spaces and punctuation or a piece or art no bigger than a postage

Mini books are pocket-sized short stories designed to be read in cafes, in waiting rooms and on buses' stamp.

But Leaf’s talents don’t end there, oh no. If you’re serious about publishing your work on a larger scale Leaf offer Root Creations, a novel and poetry printing service, Writers Critiques, for getting feedback on your work and various creative writing workshops.

Check out www.leafbooks.co.uk for their current competitions.

Shoe Tales

S

hoe Tales is the brain child of Leaf employee Sarah Edmonds. It is a rapidly growing community art project in the form of Postcard writing designed to explore the relationship between people and their footwear. Shoe Tales looks for stories about favourite pairs of shoes, childhood shoes and even the abandoned shoes you see slung over cables or lying in the gutter. Anyone can get involved in Shoe Tales, all you have to do is write or draw about your shoes on a postcard and send it in. Go to www.shoetales.co.uk for more information. Emma Pocklington was lucky enough to have a few words with Sarah on how it all started.

How did you get involved with Leaf?

I started at Leaf as a work experience girl back in Spring 2008. I was particularly interested in publicity - in marketing their publishing opportunities to budding authors, and finding new audiences for them.

Time passed, the seasons came and went, and then the lovely people at Leaf decided to give me a job.

books Wonderful.

So now I spend my time promoting our creative writing competitions to writing communities and the public, networking / collaborating with other organisations and trying to get people to buy our books, as well as designing book covers and opening the post.

'It is inspired by letter writing and a pair of shoes found hanging from a drainpipe in Roath' We're a completely independent publisher and receive no external funding. Yet we've made a name for ourselves particularly with our focus on new literary forms, such as micro-fiction and nano fiction, and are beginning to get noticed.

At present, we're planning and preparing our new project, The Leaf Writing Maga-

zine. To be launched next Spring, the magazine is aimed at creative writing students. It'll showcase the most exceptional work sent to us via our various writing competitions, feature interviews with writers, news, reviews advice and activities - a platform to promote, encourage and excite new writers.

How did you come up with Shoe Tales?

Shoe Tales - is an idea I had, inspired by mail and postal art (particularly post secret), good old fashioned letter writing and a mysterious pair of shoes found hanging from a drainpipe in Roath.

It got me thinking about Shoes, as a subject that many people could relate to. Recollecting our everyday lives makes everyone a storyteller, and the postcard format of the project encourages spontaneity.

Some people draw, others write.

The Shoe Tales project documents these connections between people and their footwear, and also encourages playful communication through the post.

I've received a huge variety of responses to the project - and have recently uploaded a lot of these onto the new website.

In the future, I'd like to make / publish a book which features my collection of Shoe Tales, including pull out postcards so people can pass these stories on. But that's another story!

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photos

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photos

Photographer of the Year 2010

Congratulations to Synne Hathaway, whose clingfilm wrapped lady really grabbed our imagination along the 'Bodies' theme.

Over Christmas, we're giving you loads of time to get raving with your crazy friends and shoot photos for the 'Party' theme. Deadline is January 22 and we're expecting loads of great entries. Tell your friends, tell your family, but don't tell your mumshe knows already. Don't ask how.

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photos

Life of the

Party

With the Christmas break on its merry way, Jake Yorath and Liz Foggitt let you into a few secrets to help capture the party season- even with no skill.

G

oing to a party in the next couple of months? Not sure you’ll remember it? Well, you could always take some great photos before you get destroyed. Yeah, it’s a really bloody good idea.

The first thing you need to do is protect your camera. Keep it close to you at all times, because even if you’re at a friend’s party the chances are there’ll be at least one pilfering wanker. Keep it on your shoulder and don’t let anyone else use it unless you completely trust them- your new best friend is probably the aforementioned thieving self pleasure artist.

If you’re using a compact, you should have a night setting- that’s a good start. With an SLR, make sure your ISO is set to high- but not too high. We can compensate for that, but that comes in a moment.

Also, make sure you have your flash on slow sync (that applies to compact users too), and you’ve got a wide angle lens. It’s not worth trundling around with a billion lenses, or any lenses except either a kit lens or, even better, a wide angle.

Try and get in people’s faces a little bit, because a party’s meant to

Photos:Jake Yorath

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be fun right? You’ll like the photos more if you concentrate on getting some quality photos of expressions and drunk behaviour than if you spend all night trying to get the perfect arty photo of a beer can.

You’ll also look like a loner. Concentrate on people who want their photo taken, because they’ll pose better and be more interesting as a photograph. Actors always look best on camera.

Composing your shot is key. A lot of the time, you can ditch the rule of thirds- get the lens as wide as you can, and get in nice and close and compose the face central. If there’re fairy lights or a disco light or similar, get them in the shot (especially with a slow sync flash) and the lights will look extra pretty.

Try doing something along the lines of our backing image- get someone backed by the party, framing them with all the people having fun. That works especially well if the person is the host.

Try and keep entertained. If you get too into the photos you’ll look like a bit of a lonely prick- I know, I’ve been there. Don’t worry, I turned that situation around and left with great photos and a good night- and so can you.ht.

photos

Learn how to take good photos, motherfucker.

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goinggoing out out

Christmas Parties

As the term draws to a close and Christmas approaches, Jack Doran investigates what festive treats await...

TRAFFIC presents:

High Contrast

UV Christmas

Thursday 10th December

Monday 7th December

Buffalo Bar

Mega Mega Mega X-mas Party Thursday 10th December Millenium Music Hall

Undertone

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ick of boring club nights with little imagination?

Then allow the TRAFFIC team to present an entirely new experience.

When you’re not raving your stockings off, why not see what else is on offer? Get involved in the madness with face painting, juggling, interactive art and much more.

This time round Undertone is being transformed into a UltraViolet grotto, the venue shall glow from floor to ceiling, as the UV paint splatters around.

Always keen to keep their guests smiling from ear to ear, the first fifty through the door get a free Christmas present, including all-in-one TRAFFIC boiler suits!

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national treasure amongst the dance music community, Welsh boyo High Contrast comes home to Buffalo Bar on Thursday the 10th.

His albums ‘High Society’ and ‘Tough Guys Don’t Dance’ made serious waves in the industry, HC's soulful brand of liquid drum and bass proving immensly popular. His remixing skills further his prominence having been approached by the likes of Missy Elliot and Adele.

As a headline DJ on the Hospital Records label, he is used to playing to huge crowds in the biggest clubs worldwide. Don’t miss out on a unique chance to see him in this intimate setting.

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t’s fair to say that C-Y-N-T has had a very good year.

Their weekly residency at The Welsh Club continues to near capacity, whilst the monthly parties at MMH are a guaranteed sell out.

Following on from Simian Mobile Disco, Annie Mac and Fake Blood, the headline act for this extravaganza is The Count and Sinden. Catapulted to fame after the success of 2007’s track, ‘Bleeper’, the pair has since enjoyed some well-deserved recognition. They shall be playing host at the Millenium Music Hall with their notorious Mega Mega Mega party.

This is big.

going out

All Night X-Mas Bashment

Joker: The Purple Rave

Friday 11th December

Friday 11th December

Glam

The Welsh Club

n a joyous union of Frequency Domain and CU’s One Mission, Christmas is coming early for all you drum and bass fiends.

The Uncontrollablez, or UNCZ, crew top the bill featuring DJ Ruffstuff and MCs Harry Shotta, Skibadee and Funsta. Further excitement comes with the welcome return of D‘n’B honcho Nicky Blackmarket. As if that wasn't enough, Digital and Outrage will be going back to back to round off the main room’s feature DJs. Room two is the domain of One Mission, headlined by the mighty Bar 9.It being a debut visit to Cardiff for the dubstepper, he is proving a seriously tantalising prospect for all fans of the genre.

As usual, the society has a whole host of talent in the form of their up and coming, resident DJs.

f the drum and bass bonanza at Glam isn’t tickling your fancy then head over to The Welsh Club for the delights that Neuropol has to offer.

Another first for Cardiff, Bristolian Joker will be taking to the decks. Having burst onto the grime scene at the tender age of 18, the DJ is now best known for his epic dubstep productions.

Praise for Joker has not stopped with the likes of Mary Anne Hobbes and Plastician singing his praises, whilst Pitchfork named him 2008’s producer of the year.

If you tire of the wobble, the middle floor is hosted by Cardiff giants Aperture, with jungle at the top of the menu.

It being ‘The Purple Rave’, Neuropol are encouraging attendees to kit themselves out in their finest purple gear, with prizes being handed out to the best dressed.

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Ashley Beedle Saturday 12th December Cardiff Arts Institute

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s time goes by, the Cardiff Arts Institute continues to amaze with the versatile range of artists they feature, the arrival of Ashley Beedle being no exception.

Having earned his stripes initially in the acid house scene of the late eighties, Beedle later played an integral role in the North London Shock sound system. However, the DJ is probably best know for his part in trio Xpress-2. Understandably, he yields great respect amongst fans of house music.

With age, his musical tastes have diversified, his sets now equally likely to favour reggae, dubstep and dancehall rather than his trademark style of house.

If you haven’t yet checked out the CAI then this is your perfect opportunity.

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arts

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nyone heading over to the Midlands for Christmas? Until late January the Ikon gallery will be exhibiting the work of Matias Faldbakken. Make sure you explore the complex theme of destruction portrayed in Abstracted Car and, if there’s anyone out there who actually gets video art, you will be pleased to hear that a piece somewhat oxymoronically titled, Untitled (Pedal Pumping) will be on show. Apparently quite a hit on YouTube, the Ikon website claims the video appealed 'particularly to the car-pedal-fetishist underground’, thus proving that art does cater for all.

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tarted in 1999 as a much needed response to the types of ‘art’ epitomised

by Tracey Emin’s My Bed, the annual Turnip Prize is now looking for this year’s entries. The event, held at a pub in Somerset, boasts previous winners such as Tea P (a bunch of tea-bags in the shape of a P) and Take a Leaf out of my Chook (a raw chicken stuffed with leaves). This year’s contenders include Don’t Take A Fence and current favourite, Knickerless Cage, a work which can only be described as a load of trapped naked Barbies. The only rule is not to try too hard; organiser Trevor Prideaux bases the success of his competition on ‘the complete lack of effort’.

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as that last argument over the washing up the icing on the cake? Some couples take this statement all too literally, judging by the occupation of Fay Millar, who has recently extended her cake baking business to include divorce parties. Now, you can not only have an eye for an eye, but a sweet tooth for a sweet tooth. Her slogan "Cake makes everything better" says it all. We’re not too sure about that, but we're certain that this is modern sculpture at its best.

Arts

update

arts@gairrhydd.com/39

arts

arts

seen

Colouring in your cultural map of Cardiff

With the new Lauren Child exhibition running at the National Museum until January next year, Reema Gehi toddles on down early to let you know whether or not it is the completely best, most wonderfullest thing in town.

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fleeting glance through the recent exhibition, Green Drops and Moonsquirters: The Utterly Imaginative World of Lauren Child and one is left marvelling at the concept of displaying illustrations of animated characters in a hall that houses Rembrandt’s painstakingly etched portraits. The whimsical works don’t fit with the conventional art display mode. In fact, they don’t even adhere to the traditional art jargon and everything that goes with it. The raison d'être being, ‘it is not an art exhibition; it is an art experience!’

The exhibit includes the very

Kes Theatre Adapted by Laurence Till

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ilms buff will have heard of Kes (1969), hailed as one of the best British movies of all time. The story of a young boy

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popular brother-sister duo Charlie and Lola, who also feature in a television show, films and even tour with a stage drama. Indeed, they are quite the rage. That apart, the art show also consists of Child’s lesserknown characters like Clarice Bean, That Pesky Rat and Hubert Horatio Bartle Bobton-Trent. A selection of 3-D sets and dollhouse furniture created for The Princess and the Pea are on display too.

The interactive show comprises over 40 original illustrations, clubbed with hands-on activities for the children and their families. The animated demo of the fantastical lives of make-believe caricatured charac-

ters makes the art-work effortlessly engaging. Besides, the museum’s restaurant has added to their food menu scrumptious snacks – ocean nibbles, green drops, moonsquirters and pink milk-- straight out of Charlie and Lola’s kitchen.

Bethany McIntyre, curator of the National Museum, states, “We have hung the artworks at an unusually low level, so that our little visitors can look, feel and immerse themselves completely and wholeheartedly into the utterly imaginative world.” The sheer delights of Lola, Charlie and company can serve as the child’s first baby step into an art gallery.

growing up in a northern mining town who trains a kestrel has since been turned into a play, yet unfortunately this piece fails to reach the same dizzying heights of success as the film.

The show perfectly captures the scene of a working class mining village, bringing out the full potential in the script for fantastic dialect and authentic characterisation. Stefan Butler, as Billy, provoked an emotional relationship with the audience.

He amused with his cheeky school-

boy banter but still engaged with the social problems for the working class families in 1960s Britain that his character represents.

Butler was outstanding. When he wasn’t onstage there was noticeably more fidgeting among the audience.

The weakness of the play is that the stage simply cannot capture the sense of freedom, exhilaration and release that Billy feels when he is with Kes and so therefore falls short of the essence of the plot.

Kirsty Allen

arts

Six Characters in Search of an Author Theatre Director: Rupert Goold

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eadlong Theatre has long been establishing itself as a company with a penchant for reinvention and the creation of emotionally explosive pieces of theatre. Such, it should come

Horrible Histories: Woeful Second World War Theatre Director: Phil Clarke

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orrible Histories were somewhat of a childhood favourite of mine; their scratch and sniff, funny fact, amusing picture format pleased

as little surprise that their current production of Luigi Pirandello’s Postmodern masterpiece, Six Characters in Search of an Author, is an extremely rousing piece of theatre that examines, with expert acuteness, so many fundamental fragments of the human condition; fear, death and madness all come under the microscope for an analysis that leaves the viewer questioning such aspects of their own existence.

Often bordering on the surreal, this latest incarnation of Pirandello’s literary magnum opus has been contemporized by Rupert Goold and Ben Power. Whilst re-contextualizing the nature of the play and its players, the adapters never find themselves too far away from the original narrative as to taint the power that the

my geeky tendencies in a manner that all other books failed. Whilst Goosebumps scared and Babysitter’s Club made me feel ‘all grown up’, it was the tales of Aztecs, Romans, Greeks and Tudors written by Terry Deary that taught me about a world before my existence and my eight year old mind boggled.

So it was with sentimentality in my heart that I entered the New Theatre ready to witness ‘Woeful Second World War’. Enter onto the stage a man: fully grown and hairy legs on show. This man was supposed to be 13years old, and whilst he pushed his voice up an octave in the most annoying manner, the spell was broken. I was too old for all this pretending malarkey and the rest of the

original yields.

If the success of a play can only be equal to the sum of its component parts, then Six Characters in Search of an Author utilizes a stellar cast of individuals whose understanding of the characters therein is so finely tuned that ounce of emotional volatility is realized ten-fold. Jack Shepherd’s portrayal of the Father character is vehemently played out without ever bordering upon the farcical, which, considering the dynamics of such a character, is no easy task.

It is truly a wondrous thing to see such a classic theatrical text reinvented with such decorum. For Headlong, the world is truly their oyster.

Jon Berry

play was spent hunched shoulders, crossed armed mourning after my long lost childhood.

The tale of two children, Alf and Sally getting evacuated to Wales during the Blitz lacks the sparkle of the books, but did glean the odd giggle from the younger members of the audience. The acting was poor, and not helped by the script itself which was cliché, bordering on cringing with lots of jokes that even my immature brain thought a wee bit pathetic. Ultimately, ‘Woeful Second World War’ would be the perfect school trip for a group of 12 year olds - but I suspect even they would enjoy the coach ride there more than the show itself.

Dom Kehat

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arts

Sitting in the Gods

Natalie Stone turns actor, director, Almighty creator, as well as audience member in Rotazza's boundary blurring new expression of modern drama, Etiquette

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’m at a café with a friend mucking about with some plasticine, I’m watching the defining moment in modern drama (the door slamming in Ibsen’s A Doll’s House), and I’m an actor on openiong night but I don't know any of my lines. Where am I?

"@"@"""How's your identity feeling?"

Well believe it or not, I’m taking part in Rotazza’s cutting-edge, identity crisis of a theatrical experience: Etiquette. Etiquette is a thirty minute ‘show’ for two people, and includes a blackboard stage of a table-top, a variety of labeled miniature props set out in front of you including a pair of figurines, and two pairs of headphones which feed you your lines and stage directions. Never has a theatre seat demanded so much of you. But of course it’s not only a seat is it? It’s also a theatrical prop. And wait, you are the star of the show that you are meant to be watching.

How’s your identity feeling? Boundaries are collapsing all over the place, and there’s no space for that coffee reality check you so desperately need in this corner of the café.

As soon as you pop on the head-

42/arts@gairrhydd.com

phones things take a significant dive into the surreal. You transform into a performing puppet, instructed on exactly how to interact with your foil and your surroundings. It starts with your recorded inner voice informing you that you are about to go on stage without knowing any of your lines. Which of course, you are. First you converse as the philosopher (thought without action) and prostitute (action without thought) from Jean-Luc Goddard’s film Vivre Sa Vivre (1962). The layers of artifice pile sky high, and at a one fiercely ironic moment I’m instructed to tell my partner ‘No-one’s written your lines for you. You’re not a character in a play.’

Interestingly enough, the philosopher reveals that he is reading Ibsen. Indeed, just as you close the distance between audience member and actor, the Ibsen on your philosopher’s page soon becomes physically enacted by your doll-sized doppelgangers with heads you have molded yourself out of plasticine.

You direct them about the blackboard stage in a God-like manner, sketching in, and erasing the room and props, eventually slamming that fragile chalky door by sealing the square in your architect's plan. Have you now somehow redefined modern drama again? But surely all those people before you have as well?

So you become a living, breathing theatrical artifice: You cry false tears with a dropper, draw a little house on the ‘hill’ of your palm as a setting for a scene of the play, and you fade the stage to black by closing your eyes. One of you even stamps ‘The End’ onto a piece of paper. Although you are in a café with your friend, the conversation is false and strangely unnerving; your actions and words are stilted as you wait patiently for every instruction. Your personality crumbles into pure performance.

"There are still doll's house doors to be slammed" Ultimately Etiquette starkly reveals in a direct way, how social etiquette inhibits the expression of any ‘true’ identity, reminding us that ‘all the world’s a stage and the men and women merely players.’ It becomes clear that modern drama is still a moveable feat that is constantly adapting to society and reinventing itself; Etiquette follows by example, demonstrating that there are still doll’s house doors to be slammed.

music live:vvbrown

local:review

feature:albums09 albums:stereophonics

xmaseditorial

raid festival 2009

listomania!

lasting away Winter blues with a mini indoor festival, Raid returned for another year on the eve of World AIDS Day, raising money for AVERT, who work to develop community responses to HIV/AIDS. As well as stonking performances from Breaking Society, Funky Arse Dancers and the Comedy Society, music is the highlight of the evening. First up are Cardiff’s own piece of Americana Jimi Alexander And The Satellites, bringing a bit of sunshine to a bloomin’ freezing winter’s night.

Silver Gospel Runners follow with their sweet, swaying blend of indie pop.

Headlining is the crazy but endearing Threatmantics who win round any doubters by proving that they’re not just about the drum bashing and wailing but can deliver thought out melody and lyrics like the best of them, all with their own Welsh alternative stamp.

DJ sets round off the night from the funktastic Jumbo Cruiser and Indy Blu and Cardiff’s coolest DJs the Vinyl Vendettas. With all that and cocktails, clothes swap, graffiti and copious amounts of cake, Raid continues to be the fun packed dayfestival with a heart.

Amy Hall

o we're nearing Christmas again, and as is the annual tradition, it's time for us all to look back at a year's worth of music and put it all into tidy little lists and rate how worthwhile it all was. Dismissive? Yep. Reductive? Probably, but it's normally kind of fun, even though no-one anywhere could possibly tell you what makes up the difference between an album that sits at, I don't know, 43rd best of the year in a list compared to the one above it at 42nd. We're talking about Pitchfork and Drowned In Sound here, by the way.

Anyway, we're going to go ahead and pull together Quench's favourite albums of the year, the hypocrites that we are, but we've made a compromise by not putting any order to them. This is mostly because, being students, we have more time than anyone else on the planet and therefore also the most disparate tastes in the world, probably. Time = Music in this case, it would seem, and the more music we all listen to, the further apart our musical habits get. To try and order the choices would have been to sentence our usually jovial Quench office (Duran Duran are on right now...) to bickering and general discontentment - it's Christmas, we don't want that.

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music

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What all this amounts to is an explanation as to why the collection we have over the page is so darned weird. It turns out, asking people for their favourite album of the last 12 months is really quite interesting. It's a tribute to the diversity of student nature that the one album people would pick - the one record they see as representative of the class of '09 - can alter so hugely.

Needless to say, the likes of Biffy Clyro and Animal Collective are bound to be popular choices (albeit for very different reasons) come January, but that we have records by the likes of dubstep mastermind Martyn, for instance, re-emerged Wu-Tang alumni Raekwon, and French-poppers Phoenix is proof that Cardiff students excel in their musical diversity, and are more than happy to show it. So good job, readers - one thing's for certain, and that's the fact that Quench is going to have a list like no other magazine come the end of this year. Ours is odd, obscure, and more than a little conflicting, but whatever, this is what Cardiff students like.

And just one more thing to leave you folks with this December - Susan Boyle has now got the fastest selling record in the history of humankind. There's no relevance to this fact here, it's just... interesting.

music@gairrhydd.com / 43

music-features

BEST OF 2009 Quench reflects on its favourite albums from the last 12 months...

Grizzly Bear Veckatimest

Biffy Clyro Only Revolutions The fifth album from the Scottish alt-rock champions is full to the brim with anthem after anthem. Continuing on the evolution of the band’s sound heard on Puzzle, the song structures are relatively straightforward, accessible to all but with enough variation to avoid becoming tiresome to listen to. First single from the album, That Golden Rule will blow your balls off and prove that the band really don’t give a fuck if you think they’ve ‘sold out’.

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Brooklyn's Grizzly Bear took 2009 by storm with their third studio album and widespread touring schedule, taking a confident stride forward from 2006's previous outing, Yellow House - no mean feat, as those who've heard that album will agree. Playing on the same themes of folk, psychedelia, intricate vocal harmonies and experimentation, Veckatimest was an undisputed triumph and a masterclass in balancing mature songwriting with accessibilty.

The Dead Weather Horehound What happens when you put four exceptionally awesome musicians in a recording studio? They create the best album of the year, obviously. Distorted organ, octave fuzz guitar, Alison Mosshart, Zeppelinesque riffs and just about anything else you’d ever want from a supergroup. Every bit as rock and roll as choking on your own vomit.

Contributors: Nick Cook, Megan Dobson, Tom Nelson, Kyle Ellison, Charlotte Dobson Rich Beech, Sam Smith, Phil Guy, Simon Roach, Lloyd Griffiths, Robin Morgan.

features-music Dirty Projectors Bitte Orca

Animal Collective Merriweather Post Pavilion

Passion Pit Manners Passion Pit's Manners epitomised 2009, yet stood apart from the electro-pop revival that was too apparent this year. The samples on Sleepyhead co-incide with the hellishly high vocals of Michael Angelakos, who's falsetto must surely be powered by his, frankly, superb beard. Some songs do fade into insignificance, but this is only due to the outstanding To Kingdom Come and Sleepyhead.

The Pains Of Being Pure At Heart Self-Titled

MPP exudes colour. In The Flowers appears with tentative arpieggos glistening until 2:30, where a bright synth explosion welcomes 2009's most euphoric album. My Girls whirls by like an addictive fairground ride, spinning to the albums constantly throbbing bassline and exultant to the chorus lyric. From there the album offers many subtleties but the whole album is one of unremitting joy, such as Summertime Clothes drunken bounciness.

That AC manage to keep up the wondrous energy for 55 minutes is testament to their enthusiasm.

Russian Circles Geneva

The summer of ‘91 returned in February this year, with the release of The Pains of Being Pure At Heart’s self-titled debut. The band’s dreamy shoegaze pop harked back to the fuzzy sound of pioneers My Bloody Valentine, whilst being drenched in infectious boy/girl harmonies. The quartet’s tales of teenage woe established them as one of the most exciting young bands around.

Russian Circles’ blend of soft, instrumental post-rock passages with layered metal grooves arguably hits its peak on this album. Sprawling tracks grab you by the throat and refuse to let up until the last bit of distorted feedback has been wrought from the guitars. Impossibly heavy, yet heart-wrenchingly ornate, songwriting that perfects the balance between beauty and visceral.

Monsters Of Folk Self-Titled

Martyn Great Lengths

With Bright Eye’s Conor Oberst and Mike Mogis, My Morning Jacket’s Jim James and singer-songwriter M.Ward this super group have come to be known as today’s Travelling Wilburys, and rightly so. The underlying sound of the album is reminiscent of past American rock, although the signature styles of each of the songwriters can clearly be noted. The four friends clearly bring the best out of each other, making this debut album one of 2009’s greatest.

As a casual observer of dubstep I’d have to admit that I’d lost faith in its longevity at the beginning of 2009; the abrasive wobble bass lines of many of the big names in the genre had started to sound a bit tired. That’s when Martyn entered my life: Great Lengths fuses dubstep with techno and house in a way that sets it aside from generic conventions and leaves the future of the genre looking very bright indeed.

Dave Longstreth - leader of the ever-changing Dirty Projectors lineup - finally found his breakthrough in 2009. After years of disjointed experimentation, Bitte Orca was the masterpiece, and put 21st century RnB to shame. Boasting some truly unbelievable vocal performances from the female members and mind-boggling muscianship, Bitte Orca showed some of the best popwriting on display this year.

Raekwon Only Built For Cuban Linx... Pt. 2 Raekwon’s long awaited sequel to his magnum opus, Only Built For Cuban Linx, is far and away the year’s best hip hop album and a celebration of the classic Wu-Tang sound. The record sees star turns from fellow Wu members Method Man, Inspectah Deck and Rza, as well as career defining performances from Ghostface Killah and Raekwon himself. A stunning return to form.

Phoenix Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix It seems that Phoenix have finally cracked it with album number 4 and after nearly a decade of playing together. With catchy tracks like 1901 and Rome, the band have invented and perfected a unique sound that fuses the classic French electro beat with bursts of colourful power pop. Also released in special edition, with a second CD that sees Metric, Animal Collective and others reworking the 10 songs, it’s definitely one of 2009’s strongest albums.

The XX XX 2009 has perhaps been unusual in its lack of a definitive musical trend, but it’s hard to think of any album that defies classification in the way that XX does. There is a sincerity in the record’s lyrics which is rarely seen in a debut, with the starry arrangements and delicate vocals complementing each other immensely, forming the backbone for one of the most understated, melancholic pop albums of the year.

music@gairrhydd.com / 45

music-feature

a bluffer's guide to...

grunge

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feature-music

With its recent resurgence, Michael Brown looks at Seattle's premier export...

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n the late 80s and early 90s, Seattle was a breeding ground for fresh bands. Dubbed “the new Liverpool” by Rolling Stone, the movement grew from discontent with the glam metal scene popularising the charts and a love of alternative rock and punk. Unfortunately, the genre ultimately became defined by Kurt Cobain’s suicide/murder in 1994, a huge blow to all but Nirvana’s album sales. This, accompanied by the media explosion surrounding the scene led to an almost mythical status taking over the music and personalities of grunge that still remains to this day.

First, some history. The 1980s played host to two key grunge forefathers, The Melvins and Green River. They not only played slower and therefore heavier than other rock music at the time, but The Melvins introduced Dave Grohl to Nirvana and Green River members went on to form Pearl Jam and Mudhoney.

Following so far? This is typical of the collaboration and community of the scene, best seen in supergroups Temple Of The Dog (1991) and Mad Season (1994), each offering some of grunge’s finest moments. The only animosity between bands came when Cobain accused Pearl Jam of ‘pioneering a corporate, alternative and cock-rock fusion’. Harsh.

"The personalities still remain to this day."

By 1992 the Seattle ‘big four’ were in full swing, thanks in part to the foundation of the Sub Pop record label and their underground promotion of the ‘Seattle sound’. Soundgarden’s Badmotorfinger, Alice In Chains’ Dirt, Pearl Jam’s Ten and Nirvana’s Nevermind were all career and genre-defining albums, with sales to match. Although grouped together under the same flannel-lined umbrella of grunge, the sound of each band is easily distinguishable.

Soundgarden commanded huge Sabbath-esque riffs, Alice In Chains featured haunting dual-harmony vocals, Pearl Jam were far more classic rock than critics gave them credit for and Nirvana followed the Pixies’ example of loud-quiet-loudquiet song dynamics to great effect.

Although initially characterised by slow, sludgy riffs, Seattle bands quickly developed a sense of subtlety, best demonstrated by several legendary MTV Unplugged performances. This, coupled with the raw power of heavier material demonstrated the variety of the Seattle scene and showed that these bands were, to overextend a metaphor, more like heavily-armed zebras than one-trick-ponies. Add to this the intensity and emotion of the lyrical and vocal styles of the era and disillusioned Generation X teenagers finally found something real to relate to. This popularity came at a price however and grunge, like rock music in general, became synonymous with drug addiction. Cobain’s aforementioned death in 1994 was echoed by Layne Staley’s similarly tragic, heroin-induced passing on 5th April 2002, exactly 8 years on from his peer’s date of death.

Whether grunge died with Cobain or the demise of pioneering Seattleites Soundgarden in 1997 is debatable, as many acts have gone on to even greater success afterwards. Dave Grohl has become a successful frontman in his own right with Foo Fighters, as well as utilising his drumming talents in Queens Of The Stone Age and, more recently, Them Crooked Vultures with Led Zeppelin's John Paul Jones and Queens Of The Stone Age's prolific Josh Homme.

Nirvana have also creeped back into media attention with the long-awaited release of their 1992 set at Reading Festival. Infinitely bootlegged for years after the perfomance, the set is considered by many to be the pinnacle of live grunge.

Banshee-wailing Soundgarden sex symbol Chris Cornell pursued a brief solo career before forming Audioslave with ex-members of

Rage Against The Machine in 2001.

Following their split in 2006 and the success of Bond theme You Know My Name, Cornell has faced mixed reviews, particularly regarding recent Timbaland-produced release Scream. Recent sightings of all four Soundgarden members together however have further fuelled longrunning reunion rumours.

"Grunge, like rock music in general, became synonymous with drug addiction."

Pearl Jam have been writing, recording and touring for 18 years, with a remarkably consistent output (latest album Backspacer was released in September to rave reviews) and a devout following thanks to their lengthy and notoriously unpredictable live shows. 2006 saw Pearl Jam perform a rapturous headline Reading Festival in front of a vast audience, after nearly 6 years absence in live performance following the Roskilde Festival tragedy, where 9 fans were suffocated to death in the audience.

Alice In Chains remained effectively inactive from 1996 onwards, prompting guitarist and singer Jerry Cantrell to go solo. A reformation for the 2005 tsunami benefits eventually led to the release of Black Gives Way To Blue in September, the band’s first new album in 14 years and the debut of new vocalist William DuVall.

At this point in time, it looks like three of the big four could once again be dominating the rock arena, ushering in a second era of grunge.

And all this from an American city that has more rainy days than Cardiff; no wonder everyone was so depressed.

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Stereophonics

music-albums

Stereophonics Keep Calm And Carry On

Mercury

K

elly Jones has two very recognisable features: his eyebrows don't quite come across on Keep Calm And Carry On but that distinctive, gravelly drawl is all present and correct.

I've liked the Stereophonics since they first burst onto the music scene way back in 1997, so I was looking forward to reviewing this, their seventh studio album released just in time for Christmas. Unfortunately, and I know I'm taking my life into my own hands saying this, I was disappointed.

Don't get me wrong, musically it sounds great. There's some cracking guitar, nifty drumming and some rhythmic, throbbing basslines that get your toes tapping. Opening track She's Alright is nothing we haven't heard before, though, just a catchy guitar riff and that smoky voice growling and howling over the top of it. It's not new, but for fans of the Stereophonics, it's bound to raise some smiles. It's definitely a song

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that will become a live favourite, with an energy that invites you to sing along and throw your body around the place.

However, while some tracks do showcase that lyrical, narrative song-writing that made their earlier albums so powerful, I found this album lacking in originality. Tracks such as Beerbottle and Could You Be The One? are chock full of clichés, while Uppercut just sounds like it's written by someone with a chip on his shoulder that would fill Caroline St. on a Saturday night.

The first single, Innocent, is a pleasant exception, however. A slightly melancholic trip down memory lane, it's full of a sense of naive, teenage invincibility and is deceptively cheerful sounding until you take the time to listen to the lyrical content on show.

I don't expect to hear the same commentary of life in a small town that made the band so famous.

Things have changed in the 12 years since that first album, and they're not the same people anymore, but this album just doesn't have that spark. It might scorch a few trees, but it won't burn a thousand.

Chritina Mackie

4.

Brakes Rock Is Dodelijk

FatCat Records

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espite its slightly excessive length - twenty tracks, including a couple of duplicated songs - this live album portrays a band happily rampaging through their own stylistic idiosyncrasies. There is definitely no threat, on the strength and character of this album, of Brakes sculpting their sound to appease NME trends or the latest retro, ironic, and ultimately hollow musical vanity.

They instead craft a sweaty country tinged punk that lovingly thrives off a diversity of influences - sounding at times like Pixies in their raucous vocal delivery, dropping a nod to various early punk bands and even creating some very grunge like guitar lines. All in all a sordid ‘pic 'n' mix’ of raw unashamed rock. Having said that, Eamon Hamilton’s vocals rage with such reckless prominence that it’s hard to miss some moments of lyrical disappointment.

albums-music

Flying Lotus Singing “Hey, hey it's a cartwheel day, better grab it quick before it gets away” with a savage urgency becomes at times, well, a tad odd.

Pixies managed to create a lyrical world of such bizarre imagery and warped storytelling that as a listener you could easily share the words with conviction. Brakes on the other hand spit lyrics often precariously balanced between interesting and irritatingly empty.

Even so, Hamilton must be praised for his natural squawk that leads the band’s ragged avatar of garage rock; a voice that crashes between enraged hillbilly and stumbling beer drenched maniac.

There are some genuine moments of inspiration scattered throughout the album, leaving you with the feeling that it would be so much more fun to have actually been there. It is the sort of music that would benefit from the grotty surroundings, questionable odours and spilled pints of a small venue.

Therefore the album is a good advert for the Brakes' live performance, but as a piece of music to listen to in your own time and space, it doesn’t quite sustain listening interest.

David Spittle

5.

Various Artists 5: Five Years Of Hyperdub

Hyperdub

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he shadowy London-based label responsible for the likes of Mercury-nominee Burial and instrumental hip-hop prodigy Flying Lotus (now with Warp) celebrate their fifth anniversary with a double-sided compilation: half celebratory, with the first disc offering the highlights of their half decade, and half forward-thinking, with a host of new material making up the second disc.

For a label so strongly associated with dubstep, this collection perhaps sets the record straight: there are certainly some fine examples of that subgenre on display from the likes of label boss Kode9 and LV, but on the whole, Hyperdub put out music that's lends itself far more to atmospherics and ambience than to dancefloors. These are melancholic, claustrophobic electronics that paint pictures of urban isolation, desolation, and all the while exploring the deepest depths of bass. To listen

to this collection in the early hours of the morning is to hear it in its element, with a backdrop of empty, artificially-lit streets and the solemnity of a city at night to accompany the nocturnal, often frightening soundscapes delivered by Kode9's roster. Again, this is not music for dancefloors.

The disc of new material features appearances from Hyperdub's flagship artists; Kode9, Burial, Zomby, Flying Lotus and Martyn all make appearances and deliver exactly what we'd expect from their catalogues. Each track broods and throbs with sounds taken from Hyperdub's palette, but each with traits and nuances specific to their creators: tracks rarely ebb from one into another, and the sonic character between each track is always audible, and always intriguing.

Hyperdub derserve to celebrate considering their gradual rise to prominance as forerunners in electronics. What's more, if there's one thing Hyperdub want to remind us of, it's how proud Britain should be of its dance music. We're world leaders, and Hyperdub provide just one example of the acheivements being made.

Phil Guy

9.

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VV Brown

music-live

Detachments Barfly

25th November 2009

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VV Brown Clwb Ifor Bach

26th November 2009

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V Brown – that singer with the big hair and even bigger voice – played an intimate gig at Cardiff’s famous Clwb Ifor Bach last week to an enthusiastic and rapt audience.

After a dramatic stage entrance involving a large feathered headdress and oversized beret, Brown proceeded to play a mellow set including many of her own songs and some covers, such as a soulful version of Eva Cassidy’s Over The Rainbow.

Although Brown started making a name for herself on the music scene

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last year, she has yet to produce a hit single, but based on this show it is clear that she will not remain elusive for much longer.

Support by a band mixing ska, rap and hip-hop called The Stow should not go unmentioned; they were easily one of the most exciting live acts I’ve seen in a long time.

Even after a thirty minute set the audience were left wanting more, making one wonder if Brown should perhaps have chosen a less talented act to follow. By comparison her set was a little underwhelming but nonetheless ended on a high note as she and the band blasted out her most famous (and catchiest) song to date; Shark In the Water.

Overall it was an enjoyable, energetic evening showcasing some incredible talent - VV Brown is set for big things. Elizabeth Blockley

here were times during tonight's gig when Detachments must have wondered why they bothered to make the effort of travelling all the way to Cardiff to play a show which contained less people than your average pub, most of whom were probably on the guest list and were at least ten years older than the band themselves.

For those few who did make the effort to attend Barfly, then support act Clinigol proved an engaging opening in spite of the apparent language barrier between their Welsh and a puzzled crowd.

Detachments themselves are described as a blend of dub and disco, unfortunately two genres of music which generally come across better with a full crowd to provide some atmosphere. Their songs, though ambitious and generally pleasing to the ear, were clearly lacking the energy that is provided by a packed venue. The lead vocalist occasionally looked dissengaged, presumably wondering why they had made the effort.

Their new single Circles was probably the highlight of the night, but the chorus would have benefited immeasurably from an audience who had heard it in advance and been able to shout it back. James Ford's lack of production and a non-responsive audience meant that the overall effect was not as moving as it should have been.

The set finally limped to an end after an hour or so of decent but forgettable music. For a band able to secure the services of someone such as James Ford, more would have probably been expected of them, but you can't fault the band for effort, particularly the slightly vampiric guitarist/synth player who wore a look of intense concentration all night. One perhaps to see in the future once they have established a broader fan base and have the audience to provide the atmosphere their set so clearly needed and arguably deserved.

Tom Rouse

music-singles

Hot Chip

singles round-up

Animal Collective What would I want? Sky Domino

7.

With the band having already made a just appearance in this year’s “Best Of” feature, Animal Collective look to be heading into 2010 in a similarly impressive fashion. The first single from their upcoming EP shows no deviation from the group’s meandering experimentation, with unusual time signatures and bizarre vocals weaving yet another wonderful piece of pop. SR

Kid Sister

Right Hand Hi Asylum Records

8.

Continuing on from her collaboration with The Count & Sinden on Beeper, Kid Sister calls on the Swedish House Mafia to craft her beats and Right Hand Hi does not disappoint. Destined for the clubs with a synth-crammed chorus more contagious than swine flu and verses that sustain her hip hop credentials, this is her best offering yet. GS

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Hot Chip

Take It In Astralwerks

6.

The second note of the track immediately sets an ominous mood of dread, and combined with a haunting vocal melody, it's somewhat of a departure from Hot Chip's upbeat sound. However as the chorus kicks in, all is happiness and light as reverberent lyrics and piano play off the sterile, atmospheric verse.

Clever stuff that's sure to pique interest for the band's new album. SS

The Automatic Interstate Armoured Records

4.

The Automatic continue their quest to finally be treated as a band with more to offer than just catchy hooks and random yelps. Unfortunately this single is possibly their most forgettable to date and as such is just one more average indie tune you’ll have forgotten the chorus by the end of the song and for the band that gave us Monster, that’s not a good sign. TR

Emalkay When I look at You Dub Police

8.

This latest track from Birmingham's finest is essentially dubstep-bynumbers, but the high-end synth hook is so catchy you'll be whistling it long after the track's finished.

With its chipmunked vocal sample and atmospheric bass, it's reminiscent of sounds forged by dubstep champion Burial. An irrestible track that any fan of the genre should check out. SS

Jamie T The Man's Machine EP Virgin

7.

The Man’s Machine opens with Jamie T’s third single from the massively successful Kings and Queens album, and it’s a hit, with an intriguing baseline and Jamie’s trademark delivery. Audiences won’t be disappointed with the infectious and catchy new material found on this EP,. 2010 looks to be another great year for the 23 year old singer-songwriter. NP

nyo’, the latest studio Ghibli animation has been trailered in the last few weeks.

While the actually film will undoubtedly

film

film be a heart-warming and What Toanimated See While beautifully Classic We're Away (That’s just a general Ghibli Here's a selection of the best films rule!)

Disney intent on coming out overseem the festive period: marketing the film as a carWhere the Wild Things Are toon The Day After TomorAvatar Sherlock Holmes row.

While Miyasaki’s films Nine areNowhere empathetic and warm, the Boy trailer promises ‘the world Humpday will never be the same’ as In case you don't know, there's Sōsuke seemingly quite a and lot of Ponyo films on at Christmas.

Enjoy these while you're munching. battle the elements through My personal favourite is Minstrels their More anand friendship.

Home Alone, Maltesers are a flexible option if you're treating noyingly, the and voiceover man yourself, order in It's a Wondeful pronounces Ghibli Jib-li, like Life with a side of Fruit & Nut. Get a moronic British tourist asksome Smarties and The Muppets Christmas Carol for the little ones.

We Like...

Your chance to see the 80s bounce back phenomenon that is Robert Downey Jr comes this Christmas in the shape of Holmes.

Personally I’ve been on the D-Jr bandwagon for some time and suggest you jump aboard!

After the low-budget success of Paranormal Activity, Part of Tom Jones the story of the husky grey lothario's severed phallus has been steadily getting bigger. You can catch a glimpse of it when it comes in Cardiff.

Martin Amis' London Fields has been screenplayed. D. Cronenborg has scripted it, meaning that if the dystopian tale makes it to screens, it's nuclear-war paranoia will remain.

We'd Rather Not...

Throw up! Apparently a super early review of Avatar suggests the use of 3D is 'literally vomit inducing'. $250m? Could have bought you GI Joe and a bottle of Sambuca for a tenner on Albany Road mate.

Lose Mark Kermode! The one who offered to quit as a critic if M-Bay returns the favor. Don't do it Mark! I'll take the bullet if you want!

(I'm sure Bay is reading...)

I swear I won't talk about sequels again. But Jurassic Park IV? How? I thought Spielberg had gone mad while looking at Aliens in Crystal Skull, but apparently he's scraped together enough grey-matter to lose his mind again. Apparently there's going to be dinosaurs with guns.

Horrifically funny.

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et again, I find my filmic deficiencies in this column.

How did I not know Bill Murray starred in an adaptation of A Christmas Carol called Scrooged?

Expect my resignation after Christmas.

For some reason, Murray reminds me of the Jolly season. Maybe it's his reluctant chipperness, but he mimics my attitude to it. I like the heaps of food enough to (just barely) brave the three months that Christmas now takes up out of the calendar.

In the trailer, Murray almost squirms with delight at playing such a moody git. After all, he gets to disperse his sarcastic charm on altogether more virtuous ethereal beings.

If Murray can remain chipper in the face of more ghosts, I can face the Christmas present too. Yay for Scrooged.

LG

Trailer

Trash

film@gairrhydd.com/53

film ‘’Two Drifters, off to see the world, there’s such a lot of world to see”

The Summer With some truly shocking rom-coms such as Couples Retreat and tion. Melissa Mackay and Annie Richardson pit Breakfast at contemporaries won the day.

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he endearing screenplay of Breakfast at Tiffany’s is just one of the reasons why it remains such a timeless classic. It beautifully encapsulates the spirit of true romance whist fiercely maintaining a genuine comedic undertone. The eccentricity of chic Audrey Hepburn in her defining role is perfectly complemented by the authentic charisma of actor George Peppard as her leading man. Viewers are taken on an emotive rollercoaster as the charming narrative progresses and we follow the ups and downs of their tremulous relationship.

"The heart-warming resonance of Breakfast at Tiffany’s makes it the epitome of the genre" The unexpected elements of the film are the most enchanting to a modern viewer; the gentle naivety of Holly, her cat without a name, her scatterbrained apartment and her

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true adoration of all things Tiffany’s.

Moon River, the Oscar winning song written for the soundtrack, sums up the films sweet nature and provides a soothing backdrop to the quality narrative.

Released in 1961, far before the format became stale, Breakfast at Tiffany’s is at the top of its game.

Newcomers to the scene make a half arsed attempt at a new genre, their awkward portrayals of modernday romance leaving a bitter taste with the viewer. In the popular new release, 500 Days of Summer, Tom and Summer’s twisted story of romantic destruction obliterates the audiences dreams of ‘Happily Ever After’. You can’t help rooting for Tom, the hapless and idealistic central character, and as a result share in his disappointment over his fruitless starry-eyed dreams. This unsatisfying and disheartening story is undeserving of the term romantic comedy while the heart-warming resonance of Breakfast at Tiffany’s makes it the epitome of the genre.

My philosophy is: “If It Ain’t Broke, Don’t Fix It! Annie Richardson

film "This is a story of boy meets girl but you should know upfront this is not a love story"

of love?

The Ugly Truth clogging up cinemas, Film set out to find inspiraTiffanys with (500) Days of Summer to see whether classics or

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he opening line of this recent Box Office hit instantly demonstrates the honest integrity of the film’s playful motif. Challenging romantic conceptions from the get-go, 500 Days of Summer provides an upfront representation of contemporary relationships. For audiences bored with the constant flow of predictable and uninspired rom coms it provides a fresh take on an age old cinematic tradition.

Summer, our heroine, epitomises the typical male mind-set with respect to love. On the flip side Tom, our hero, falls head over heels for her feminine whiles.

"Rom-coms have been in dire need of a facelift, predictable storylines and clichéd endings doing little to inspire" The artistic presentation of the film is altogether fresh, incorporating an unexpected musical number along with whispers of impulsive

animation. These innovative techniques weave their way through the edgy non-linear time sequencing keeping an audience on their toes.

The romantic comedy genre has been in dire need of a face-lift, the predictable storylines and clichéd endings doing little to inspire viewers. Characterisation in romantic comedies has begun to grate on audiences as repetitive lead roles become less and less engaging. Compare this tired casting to the fresh face of indie kid Joseph Gordon-Levitt whose realistic performance in 500 Days of Summer is a welcome change to the genre.

The predicable staging of Breakfast at Tiffany’s is stale and unrealistic, the one dimensional characters providing little satisfaction for the viewer. Happy Ever After just won’t cut it these days.

Utterly charming and fiercely current, 500 Days of Summer is emblematic of what I consider an essential step-forward within the romantic comedy genre.

Melissa Mackay

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film

Soundtrack Festival A film festival with a difference, the Soundtrack festival took place in Cardiff showcasing films and their relationship with music.

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ased at several venues across Cardiff, the soundtrack festival provided a great line up for its second year. The showpiece event was held at Wales Millenium Centre with Gabriel Yared performing alongside the 80 piece National Orchestra of Wales in tribute to Anthony Minghella. The Super Furry Animals performed the hits from their first three albums and frontman Gruff Rhys also debuted as a film maker with Seperado! But not only was this event musically and film based, it was also informative and insightful with conversations held with Velvet Underground founder John Cale and Mighty Boosh, now Bunny and the Bull director, Paul King. The festival was a diverse film indulgence which drew in a varied audience to match its line-up. Having enjoyed this festival so much, we anticipate next years offerings but for now, we review some of the screenings for your perusal.

All Tommorows Parties

American Psycho

Making a film about a festival seems a contradictory task. How can you thread together one cohesive film about a seemingly kaleidoscopic bunch of experiences? Luckily, the ATP film manages to do this without diluting the free and experimental attitude as well as showcasing some amazing music. While some outlets have accused ATP of snobbery, i think the lo-fi aesthetic is merely of particular appeal, rather than an exclusive or elitist one. Rather than a hippyish commune, ATP's festival goers seem to have an unforced and accidental camaraderie. Combined with a soundtrack which is, by turns, driving, inventive and intoxicating, and makes for a friendly and invigorating experience. LG

This film is a bloody psychotic journey into a successful American Dream businessman’s inner world. Patrick Bateman (played

by Christian Bale, who brings us an extraordinary performance) is trying to reach a visual perfection of his life. He has a nice flat, is handsome and well educated.

Trying to live the good life illusion created by the society, he does not feel like expressing himself enough, and therefore he falls into madness. He starts by killing people who look more successful than him, and continues to kill anyone, just to release his deep hidden emotions and to feel alive.

It is a bloody satirical dark masterpiece with an ending that turns everything upside down. AU

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Bunny and the Bull A story about a buddy road trip brought to you by the director of the Mighty Boosh, you may be making your prejudgements already. Bunny and Stephen go on a European adventure where they come across many a crazy character including that played by Noel Fielding as a matador and Julian Barratt as a Polish dog lover. There aren’t laughs a plenty in Boosh style as many might be expecting but the visual display is extremely engaging. With sets made out of newspaper and crabs, this is an imaginative masterpiece beautifully shot and leaving you with a warm fuzzy feeling inside, as well as a great new catchphrase: "Are you f*cking my face! JT

film Mugabe and the White African If there is one documentary to see this year that isn’t BBCs Life, it is Mugabe and the White African. The film was covertly filmed in Mugabe’s turmoil wracked Zimbabwe, and follows two white farmers whose land is under threat

by Mugabe’s highly controversial land reclamation policy, which has forced thousands of white landowners to flee the country as their land is repatriated and given to the black community. The film follows farmers Mike and Ben Campbell as they bravely try and take Mugabe’s government to court over this breach of their human rights, despite being harassed and beaten. Bailey and Thompson’s cinematography is nothing short of astonishing given the covert nature of the filming. The films soundtrack also beautifully portrays the plight of both the farmers and Zimbabwe under the oppressive regime, with a haunting, majesterial score that compliments this wonderful movie beautifully. It is a film that deserves to be seen by everyone. OF

America

n Psych

Seperado!

Gruff Rhys' first foray into directing follows his South American tour of 2006. It's so much more than an indulgent road movie though. The loosely strung plot is based about Rhys trying to find 1970's Argentinian guitarist Rene Griffiths, who he saw singing Spanish songs in Welsh on S4C and was a distant relative.On the following quest, Gruff spins tall tales, we see his alien live show bemuse local Patagonians (including Power Ranger helmet), find the last known sighting of Butch's Sundance kids and swap history with numerous characters. It's a film with heart and though slightly wandering, it has plenty of funny and warm moments to make it a typically eccentric and charming watch. LG

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Horror double bill: The Quartermass Xperiment To The Devil, A Daughter First, The Quartermass Xperiment, a paranoid sci-fi thriller clearly a product of the cold-war, where an alien organism hosted in an astronaut's body eats its way through rural England.

Much of the violence will seem tame to the modern viewer, yet the film remains astonishing in that it pre-dates The Thing by almost 30 years. Its concept is near identical and stretches every pound of its minuscule budget to create tension to compete with John Carpenter's masterpiece. In contrast, it's hard to believe that To The Devil, A Daughter was made 3 years after The Exorcist redefined satanic horror. Attempting to shock with an excessive combination of blood, nudity and Christopher Lee, the film offers nothing memorable other than an Alien-style birth. These films serve as bookends for Hammer Studios, yet their debut piece is far superior to their swan song. PB

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film

The Informant!

Dir: Steven Soderbergh Cast: Matt Damon, Scott Bakula, Joel McHale

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oderbergh’s latest work is, as the poster says, ‘Based on a Tattle-Tale’; namely the real-life events of renowned whistleblower and ADM employee Mark Whitacre (Damon), and the subsequent book (which shares its name with the film) by Kurt Eichenwald.

In a role that is as far from Jason Bourne as it is possible to be, Damon effortlessly excels. His tubby, moustachioed Whitacre is a top-draw comic creation, exhibiting shades of righteous indignation when he is shoe-horned by the FBI into aiding their investigation into the much-publicised ADM price-fixing scandal, all the while acting according to his well-meaning but skewered moral compass. His Walter Mitty-esque delusions of grandeur result in a truly epic shitstorm of his

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own creation, intercut by his increasingly random interjections on various unrelated topics from magazine cuttings. That Whitacre is not only believable, but likeable on top of that, is a remarkable achievement in itself.

Although it takes about half an hour to get going, the results are worth watching. Damon rides a wave of opportunism and blind luck through a wilfully silly script in which moments of hilarity are never far away. Even Whitacre’s apparent bipolarity is played on for laughs, although the subject matter is treated with enough subtlety so as not to make a mockery of the condition (see Observe and Report). The supporting cast, including Bakula and McHale as Whitacre’s FBI handlers, and Melanie Lynskey as his long-suffering wife, Ginger, are solid enough, but they struggle not to be eclipsed by a masterful performance from Damon.

The Informant! won’t be to everyone’s tastes, and with its dialogue-heavy script, some may view it as self-indulgent rather than satirical. For those of you with a bit of patience, however, you could be in for a treat.

Steve Wright

8.

A Serious Man Dirs: Joel & Ethan Coen Cast: Michael Stuhlbarg, Richard Kind, Aaron Wolff

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arry Gopnik’s life is collapsing around him: his wife wants a divorce, his son owes his dealer money and is preparing for a Bar Mitzvah, his brother in law is sleeping in the living room, whilst his daughter only cares about how this all affects her and her social life.

Larry is losing himself and trying to sort his life out by visiting a series of Rabbis.

On paper, this film sounds like a typical family drama, in which everything will all be all right in the end.

But, as is ever the case when the Coen brothers are involved, nothing is ever that simple.

The film starts as oddly and abruptly as it ends, with the opening scene amusingly dealing with the complex relationship between religion and raltionality in a way that

film

sets the tone for the rest of the film.

The film is set where the brothers grew up; a suburb of Minneapolis where it has been hinted is losely based on the brothers’ childhoods.

If true, this explanation would make sense, with the two directors putting meticulous care and attention into every shot, every sequence and every scene. In quiet scenes you can hear every movement, even the slightest creek of a chair, whilst in louder scenes the noise is simply overwhelming. It is this intense combination that makes A Serious Man such a joy to watch unfold.

The cast is also brilliant, with not one 'star' being cast. In this context this could be considered to be a good thing, as their shine would dull the film’s fantastic content. Michael Stuhlbarg in particular gives a fantastic, sympathy-evoking performance in the central role.

The result of all this, combined with a darkly humorous script is a funny, yet heartbreaking film. It is essential viewing for anyone and everyone; even more so if you already love the Coen brothers.

Zac Cole

9.

The Twilight Saga: New Moon Dir: Chris Weitz Cast: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner

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ased on the second book in Stephenie Meyer’s four-part fantasy romance series, New Moon continues the love story of 109-year-old vampire Edward Cullen (Pattinson) and human girl Bella Swan (Stewart).

The story picks up at Bella’s 18th birthday party, where disaster strikes in the form of a paper cut, and despite the Cullen vampires' ‘vegetarianism’, Edward is forced to backhand his brother across a room to stop him from doing what vampires traditionally do. Cue Edward’s departure to ‘protect’ Bella, and Jacob Black’s (Lautner) timely arrival to rescue her from eternal misery. Predictably, a love triangle ensues with the added complica-

tion that Jacob tends to transform into a wolf at regular intervals. The climax sees the Bella rushing to stop Edward from asking the Volturi (vampire mafia) to kill him after he mistakenly believes Bella has committed suicide.

"If you're a fan it'll tick all the boxes."

Clearly this film is never going to win any prizes for cutting edge cinematography: the gratuitous slowmo shots are embarrassing; the dialogue is overly saccharine; and the allusions to Romeo and Juliet are massively unsubtle. On the other hand, if you’re a Twi-hard fan it’ll tick all the boxes. Chris Weitz has kept all the major scenes from the book, and the bigger budget means the action sequences are more exciting. The arrival of the Volturi brings with it some genuinely excellent performances from Michael Sheen as Aro and Dakota Fanning as Jane.

If you’ve read the books you’ll love it; if you can’t embrace the cheese - don’t bother.

Clare Hawker

5.

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film

A Christmas Carol Dir: Robert Zemeckis Cast: Jim Carrey, Gary Oldman, Colin Firth

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t’s official: Disney have beaten the Coca-Cola advert. This newly adapted version of Charles Dickens’s classic will have you prematurely reaching for the first door on your advent calendar.

3D specs in tow, we begin by soaring over snow-crested cottages and into the hustle and bustle of Christmas Eve in Victorian London. The scene is recognisable from other adaptations (yes, even The Muppet Christmas Carol), but never has it been so stunningly brought to life – already justifying the extra £2.

Of course, one grumpy fella sticks out like a sore thumb amongst

all this charming cockney banter.

Jim Carrey’s incarnation of Ebenezer Scrooge is a sharp-chinned, humbug-mumbling misanthrope; the polar opposite of Ace Ventura and other such happy-go-wacky roles.

Confronted by the ghosts of Christmas past, present and yet-to-come (also played by Carrey), he learns the error of his ways in a spooky overnight voyage that teaches him the true value of Christmas.

"In terms of technological brilliance, Zemeckis comes up trumps."

It’s curious that Zemeckis chose

to cast his actors in multiple parts.

Whilst Carrey copes marvelously, it seems too much for Oldman to play both Bob Cratchett and his crippled son, Tiny Tim; turning what should have been a heartbreaking domestic scene into a bizarre gimmick. Whilst the expert use of motion-capture technology does disguise this surrealism, and redeems the director somewhat, occurrences such as Scrooge’s unexplained shrinking as he is chased in one of the films most climactic sequences are unforgivable, and destroy the dark tone with vacant attempts at comic relief.

Though far from a classic, there are still some poignant moments, and the script is almost entirely true to Dickens’ novella – refreshing, when compared to the wealth of Americanised adaptations. In terms of technological brilliance though, Zemeckis comes up trumps.

It’s a marvel to behold, and well worth seeing.

Matt Ayres

7.

Steve Wright takes a look at other skewered takes on the festive classic...

Michael Caine - The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992) Gonzo is Dickens; Kermit is Bob Cratchit; Statler is Jacob Marley, and Caine is brilliant as Scrooge in one of the more memorable adaptations in recent memory. The Muppet effect ensures that this is one of those films you'd have to have a heart of stone to dislike. Fun for all ages, this is one thing you genuinely won't mind watching with the annoying little cousins on the big day.

Rowan Atkinson - Blackadder's Christmas Carol (1988) In this tale, it's fair to say that everything's amiss. This incarnation has Ebeneezer Blackadder as the 'nicest man in England', who is constantly taken advantage of by his freeloading neighbours, before a congratulatory visit from Robbie Coltrane as the Spirit of Christmas reminds him that 'bad guys have all the fun.' Atkinson's wittiness alone make it all worthwhile.

Ross Kemp - A Christmas Carol (2000) London's changed a fair bit in a hundred years. Set on a grotty council estate, this reimagining sees Kemp as Eddie Scrooge (see what they did there?), an unpopular loan shark who is visited by ghosts who then...you know the story by now. Although Kemp is hilariously bad as always, this is still an interesting and unique take.

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