The Georgia Voice - 3/14/14, Vol. 5 Issue 1

Gold Dome wrap ‘Religious freedom’ bills likely to return. Page 15

Haring discovery ATL artist discovers lost local work. Page 24

Catching up Philip Rafshoon talks life after Outwrite. Page 29

WHOSE BELOVED COMMUNITY?

MARCH 27–29, 2014

BLACK CIVIL AND LGBT RIGHTS CONFERENCE n Keynote Conversation featuring Julian Bond, Mandy Carter, and Alexis Pauline Gumbs Thursday, March 27 • 7:30 p.m.

Glenn Auditorium / Free and open to the public

Join us for 16 panels and discussions featuring writers, artists, scholars, and activists exploring the intersections of black and LGBT identities, communities, and activism.

For more information and to register visit www.emory.edu/wbc or call 404.727.2031.

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n Conference Friday and Saturday, March 28–29 9:00 a.m.–4:15 p.m.

Emory Conference Center Hotel Registration fees are on a sliding scale, visit our website for more details. n Special screening of the marriage equality film The New Black Thursday, March 27 • 3:00 p.m.

Emory Center for Ethics • Free n An Evening of Spoken Word Poetry featuring Staceyann Chin • Jericho Brown • Red Summer Friday, March 28 • 7:30–9:00 p.m.

Harland Cinema, Dobbs University Center • Free

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03.14.14

03.14.14

IN THIS ISSUE Photo by Patrick Saunders

FEATURED STORY

NEWS

5 | News briefs 10 | New report shines light on lack of LGBT funding in South 15 | General Assembly wrap-up, what’s next on religious freedom bills 22 | GA Voice by the numbers 23 | New bigger, bolder GA Voice website debuts

EDITORIAL

19 | Finding our identities in the LGBT equality movement

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

29 | CATCHING UP . . . WITH PHILIP RAFSHOON

OUTSPOKEN ALAIN GUIRAUDIE

HHHH CRITICS’ PICK

“A QUEER-CINEMA LANDMARK! MESMERIZING… HITCHCOCKIAN!” –TIME OUT NEW YORK

“(W)hen you talk about ‘the gay community,’ you are talking about MY com- CALENDAR 31-34 | Calendar FRIENDS & FOES IN THEIR OWN WORDS munity. I’ve never hidden COLUMNISTS my sexuality from any38 | That’s What She Said: Melissa Carter says you’re never too old “We are a PARENTING one, my whole life in fact, 39 | Sometimes Y: Ryan Lee asks if gays and I’ve been waiting for publication and will cling to ‘what it means to be a man’ someone to ask about it in promote good, strong an interview . . . I’ve tried to and fearless parenting lead the questions a few in our community – times, to no avail!”

without prejudice.”

— Louisianna-based parenting magazine NOLA Baby & Family responding to criticis of their January-February issue focusing on LGBT Parents. (March 14, Towelroad)

“AN ABSORBING AND INTELLIGENT EXPLORATION OF QUEER DESIRE.”

— Kristian Nairn who portrays Hodor on HBO’s fantasy series “Game of Thrones” in an interview with the show’s fan site “Winter Is Coming.” (March 11, CNN)

–VaRIETY

“BEST GAY FILM IN DECADES!”

–EMaNUELLEVY.COM

Photo via HBO

WWW.STRANDRELEASING.COM

staRts FRiDaY, maRcH 14

CheCk theatre direCtories or Call for showtimes

Via Facebook

ExclusivE OnE-WEEk EngagEmEnt

Official photo

A FILM BY

24 | Atlanta gay artist’s quest uncovers Keith Haring art 26 | Food: A day at Red Lobster 29 | Catching Up...with Philip Rafshoon 30 | Fact outweighs fiction in Atlanta Film Festival’s LGBT selections 35 | Theater: New Actor’s Express production, Elaine Stritch doc opens 36 | Film: Gay Frenchmen mix love and death in new film 37 | Books: ‘Pee-Shy: A Memoir’ recalls an incredible journey

“The thing that I think is getting a little tiresome is that the gay communities have so bullied the American people . . . Well not with the Constitution you don’t.”

— Michele Bachmann during a talk radio show interview at the Conservative Political Action Conference held last week. (March 11, CBS Minnesota)

“While many insist on the trial procedure for many reasons, I offer that trials are not the way forward. Church trials result in harmful polarization and continue the harm brought upon our gay and lesbian brothers and sisters.”

— Bishop Martin D. McLee, head bishop of the United Methodist Church in New York, in a statement to end church trials in his region for ministers who perform same-sex marriages. (March 10, New York Times) Photo via UMC)

Photo via UMC

www.theGAVoice.com

Official photo

STATE REP. SIMONE BELL DRAWS PRIMARY CHALLENGE AFTER RUN-IN WITH FORMER OPPONENT

State Rep. Simone Bell will face Erica Morris Long, the wife of her former opponent Ralph Long, in the Democratic primary on May 20.

Bell made history as the first out AfricanAmerican lesbian elected to a state legislature when she won a special election in November 2009. She ran unopposed in 2010 and represents District 58, which includes Cabbagetown, East Atlanta, Grant Park, Gresham Park, Boulevard Heights and Kirkwood.

In 2012, Republicans pitted Democrats against Democrats through redistricting and Bell, an incumbent, was forced into an election against another Democratic incumbent, Ralph Long. Bell received the endorsement of Georgia Equality and went on to defeat Long in the primary.

At the time, Long expressed disappointment with Georgia Equality’s endorsement of Bell.

On March 6, Long, who at the time said he was running for a spot in the Fulton County Commission, approached Bell on the House floor of the legislature and “threatened” her, according to a Facebook status update she wrote.

“Ralph Long, who lost against me last election, just came onto the House floor and threatened me. He said if I support one of his opponents in the Fulton County Commissioner Election on May 20, 2014, he will go and qualify to run against me. He then stood over my desk peering at me with squinted eyes and a sinister smile. It’s not so much WHAT he said but HOW he said it: intimidating body language, speaking through clenched teeth, standing close. I reported it to the Speaker and to Capitol Police. Dude, you need help. LOVE,” Bell wrote.

Long told GA Voice he wasn’t sure why Bell felt the need to post about their confrontation on Facebook and said he was not being threatening when he spoke to her.

“Unfortunately anytime a black man wants to be competitive he is considered being threatening. This was not me being threatening but me being competitive,” Long said. He said he also warned Bell because he saw she on a campaign flyer that she was supporting his opponent, Barbara Muhammad, for the Fulton Commission seat.

Long added that it costs only $400 to quality for a state seat and $1,000 to qualify for a county seat and because he had not yet qualified for the Fulton seat and he was going to wait to see what Bell did before he decide which race to run for.

“I’m damned if I do, damned if I don’t,” he said. “I haven’t done anything to her. I don’t know why she is doing this. But if she is going to do this I might as well run for state representative again. I’m ready to put gay marriage on the table and fight for the LGBT community. Maybe she’s insecure because she hasn’t been below I-20 since she was elected.”

NEWS

NEWSIN BRIEF

After he said he would oppose her in the Democratic primary for supporting an opponent in the Fulton County Commission race, Ralph Long instead enlisted his wife, Erica Morris Long, to run against state Rep. Simone Bell. (Bell file photo, Long photo via Facebook)

Bell worked hard to defeat the anti-gay NATIONAL QUEER ASIAN SUMMIT “religious freedom” bill in the House this PLANNED FOR ATLANTA IN APRIL session, including an emotional plea to the The National Queer Asian Pacific Islander Judiciary Subcommittee and the bill’s spon- Alliance (NQPIA) is working with local activists sor to not move forward with the bill. Both to host a Southern Regional Leadership Sumthe Senate and House bills did not survive mit in Atlanta April 4-6. this session.

Asian Pacific Islanders are the fastest She also said she was homebound for growing minority group in the South, accordmuch of 2013 after seriously breaking her ing to a press release announcing the summit. ankle and then was in a wheelchair for “NQAPIA is a federation of LGBT AAPI organifour months, which kept her from visiting zations that builds local capacity, invigorates as many constituents, in response to Long’s grassroots organizing, develops leadership, claim she had not been “below I-20.” and challenges homophobia, racism, and Bell said she supported Muhammad over anti-immigrant bias,” states the press release.

Long on March 6. When qualifying rolled The Regional Summit will be a weekendaround on March 7, Long chose not to qual- long training and issue-briefing designed to ify for the state representative race or the bring together LGBT AAPI people from across Fulton Commission race. Instead, his wife, the South together where attendees will netErica Long, qualified to run against Bell. work, be taught new skills, learn about emergOn his Facebook page ing issues and engage in on March 7, Ralph Long collaborative national prowrote, “To all my friends gram planning, the release I’m so excited to anstates. nounce that my beau“This year, instead of dotiful, smart, wife Erica ing one national Summit, Morris Long has decided we are looking forward to to run for Georgia House expanding our presence in District 58. Know that she localities around the counis my better everything try by doing five regional and I ask you to support Summits. We are particuher even more than you larly excited to come to the have me in the past. This South and explore opporis my wish and I thank tunities to build new partyou very much and love nerships with AAPI LGBTQ each and everyone [sic] leaders in the region,” said of you.”

Ben de Guzman, NQAPIA Ralph Long did not co-director of programs in qualify for the Fulton a statement.

Ben de Guzman is NQAPIA co-director of County race.

HEALTH INITIATIVE programs. (Photo via Facebook)

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GARDEN PARTY TO PRESENT AGENCY’S FIRST LEGACY AWARDS

The Health Initiative’s annual Garden Party is set for May 18 and will honor its first-ever Legacy Award winners.

Dorothy Gallaway, an RN and nurse practitioner who retired after 20 years as the head of Family Health Enterprises, a nonprofit she founded to serve all people and their medical needs regardless of ability to pay, is one of the first recipients of the Legacy Award. Also receiving a Legacy Award is Dr. Kimball Johnson, founder and medical director of Jobri Center for Integrative Health. Johnson worked 23 years in internal medicine, HIV medicine and sports medicine and was also an early board member for the organization under its original name, the Atlanta Lesbian Cancer Initiative.

The Legacy Awards will not be an annual award and recognize people for longstanding work to ensure everyone has access to quality healthcare.

Receiving this year’s Healing Angel Award is Jeff Graham. Graham is the executive director of Georgia Equality but is also a founding member of Georgians for a Healthy Future and is a leader with the organization Cover Georgia, a group working toward Medicaid expansion for the state.

The Garden Party is the Health Initiative’s largest fundraiser and helps fund programs that provide quality healthcare and services to LGBT people who otherwise could not pay.

The Garden Party will be held at the Rush Center. To learn more, visit http://tiny. cc/2014gardenparty“While our community has made great strides in recent years, our movement has an important and critical journey ahead,” said Sarah Kate Ellis. “Together with our dedicated staff, I will push for a culture where everyone in the LGBT community is fully welcomed and respected by our neighbors. I look forward to leading GLAAD and creating a world where LGBT people and our families have the freedom to joyously-- and openly-- live a life they love.”

Ellis will begin her role in January 2014.

She will be based in GLAAD’s New York City office.

Dorothy Gallaway (File photo)

10 | GA VOICE

COVER STORY

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www.theGAVoice.com

Left out in the south

National funding foundations are leaving southern LGBT nonprofits high and dry

By PATRICK SAUNDERS

$4.8 million in 2012.

• This total is equivalent to between 3 percent and 4 percent of all LGBTQ funding and between 8 and 10 percent of funding dedicated to local and statewide work.

• By comparison, in 2012 New York City received over $10 million for local services and advocacy—more than the entire South received in both 2011 and 2012. San Francisco received just over $4 million in 2012—nearly the same amount as the entire U.S. South in either 2011 or 2012.

O

f the estimated 8 million “out” LGBT adults in the U.S., nearly 2.7 million—or about onethird—of them live right here in the South. But according to a new report, the region receives only three to four percent of domestic LGBT funding and local organizations are feeling the pinch.

The report released in February titled “Out in the South” by Funders for LGBTQ Issues, a 30-year-old organization dedicated to improving funding to LGBT organizations, came about last year thanks to an informal conversation between several southern LGBT donors.

That conversation led to a roundtable discussion last April, resulting in a historic meeting in Charlotte, N.C., that drew more than 50 people representing 30 organizations from 11 states—including seven southern states.

Local organizations Georgia Equality, Southerners on New Ground and SPARK Reproductive Justice Now were a part of that conversation.

“This meeting solidified support for the LGBT Southern Funding Project—a project specifically focused on expanding the scale and impact of funding for LGBTQ communities in the U.S. South,” says Funders for LGBTQ Issues President Ben Francisco Maulbeck.

The report is not only useful to donors, but to LGBT organizations as well to see clearly what they have known all along—the South is often left out.

“While sadly the information contained in this report might not be surprising, it is always a useful starting point for any conversation to have all the facts and this report paints a pretty clear picture of foundation funding for LGBTQ issues in the U.S. South,” says Lyle Matthew Kan, director of communications and education for Funders for LGBTQ Issues.

And the report clearly shows that while the rest of the country is riding on a tidal wave of LGBT equality, from marriage equality to transgender rights to state employment non-discrimination laws, the South is lagging behind.

From the report: “Unfortunately, recent momentum and policy gains for LGBTQ equality have largely not reached the U.S. South. Of the 14 Southern states (Alabama, Arkansas, Florida, Georgia, Kentucky, Louisiana, Mississippi, Oklahoma, North Carolina, South Carolina, Tennessee, Texas, Virginia, and West Virginia), not a single one has passed employment nondiscrimination legislation, and every state bans recognition of same-sex marriage.

“Still, the South is home to an impressive co-

‘Our community is substantial’

Graphics and charts courtesy of

Funders for LGBTQ Issues hort of LGBTQ leaders and is rich with opportunities for LGBTQ advancement.

“LGBTQ Southerners are among the most likely to be raising children and to be living in poverty. Moreover, the challenges facing LGBTQ Southerners are exacerbated by a lack of philanthropic resources for LGBTQ communities in the Southern states. In the face of these challenges, LGBTQ leaders in the South have done much with little, developing innovative advocacy strategies, cost-effective service organizations and deep intersectional coalitions.”

There were several other items that jumped out in the report, including: • Between 2011 and 2012, LGBT domestic funding averaged $5.78 per LGBT adult nationwide, with the northeast receiving an average of $10.10 per LGBT adult. But if you’re gay in the South? The average per LGBT adult was just $1.71.

• Between 2011 and 2012, LGBT funding for the South totaled $9.2 million. By comparison, in 2012 alone New York City received $10 million for local advocacy and services.

• Atlanta was only one of two cities home to organizations receiving more than $1 million in LGBT funding—Houston was the other.

• Health issues receive the largest percentage of southern funding, while civil rights receive a

much smaller percentage.

• 47 percent of LGBT funding in the South comes from southern-based funders. The other 53 percent comes from funders based outside of the South.

• The top four groups to receive LGBT funding in Atlanta between 2011 and 2012 were Southerners on New Ground ($365,825), Georgia Equality ($232,150), SPARK Reproductive Justice Now ($113,333) and Jewish Family and Career Services ($100,500).

• No other group in Atlanta besides those four received more than $100,000 in LGBT funding between 2011 and 2012.

Also from the report: • In 2011 and 2012, foundation funding for LGBTQ issues reached record highs at $123 million and $121.4 million respectively.

• Domestic funding of LGBTQ issues totaled $95 million in 2011 and over $101 million in 2012.

Excluding funding for national organizations, funding dedicated to local and statewide work came in at just under $51 million in 2011 and just over $46 million in 2012.

• However, funding for LGBTQ and allied organizations based in or serving the 14 Southern states totaled a mere $4.4 million in 2011 and

While the issue might just be coming to light now for most, it’s something local LGBT nonprofits have known about and have been trying to work through for years.

“Our community has needs just like any other community,” says Georgia Equality Executive Director Jeff Graham. “When you ask folks in the LGBT community where they’re most comfortable receiving services, it’s from an organization that is LGBT, so they can feel safe being who they are.”

Southerners on New Ground, a group that works primarily with rural LGBT southerners on issues such as immigration, poverty and racism, participated in the report. Caitlyn Breedlove, codirector of SONG, says the facts presented show “breathtaking gaps” in funding discrepancies.

But, she stressed, the discrepancies do not mean there is not significant LGBT equality work being done in the South already—and the report is not an invitation to groups from the North or West to come and plant their flag on southern ground with the intent to take over organizing for the LGBT movement.

“Our community is substantial. It may not look like the infrastructure elsewhere, but it is important to fund the groups already on the ground,” Breedlove says. “National groups don’t want to come in and do training. And most national groups do not know what our needs are.”

SONG has an approximate $500,000 annual budget and receives funding from groups including the Arcus Foundation, the Ford Foundation and the Astrea Foundation.

With this funding, SONG works directly in communities to empower the people who live there, Breedlove explains.

“Our money goes to leadership development within the membership base [throughout the South] and also with coali-

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ry

tion and ally work,” she says.

One of the most important things funders need to work at as they decide where to award grants is the fact that in the near future, the South will not be an majority-white population.

“We need a multiracial movement, we need organizations ready to tackle these issues—it’s important to fund that work, period,” she says.

South seen as ‘unwinnable’ by national funding groups Brad Clark, national HRC spokesperson, referenced the report in a panel discussion at the 2014 Northeastern Regional Prides/Prides of the Southeast Joint Conference at The W Atlanta – Midtown on March 9, telling the crowd that there now exists what he calls “this emergence of two Americas” where one state or region has rights and another doesn’t.

“We scratch our heads and wonder why there isn’t more progress in certain parts of the country and the reality is that our own community isn’t investing here,” he said. “We can’t afford as a community to let some people have rights and some people not. We need to make deeper and smarter investments in places that have historically been overlooked.”

In the Life Atlanta, along with party promoters, helps put on the largest Black Gay Pride festival in the nation. ITLA spends big bucks to make it happen using an all-volunteer staff.

The group’s annual budget is about $315,000 according to Executive Secretary Tyai Green, of which $250,000 goes towards Black Gay Pride that Labor Day Weekend alone. He says the remaining $65,000 is used throughout the rest of the year for rent for office space, printing costs for marketing materi-

als, for meet-and-greets, transportation to other Pride festivals that staff members attend, advertising and other expenses. So in other words, “We operate on a skeleton budget most of the time,” he says.

“We consider it to be a successful year if we come out of Pride with the bills paid,” Green continues. “We never come out in the black.”

77 percent of ITLA’s budget comes from grants and corporate donations, with the remaining 23 percent coming from individual donations.

Green says that with an extra $250,000 a year in operating funding, they would hire two paid staff members, move to a larger office space and upgrade their existing telecommunications and office equipment, all of which would allow them to continue to find opportunities for and increase the visibility of Atlanta’s African-American LGBT community.

“The South has for so long not been able to secure funding because it wasn’t seen as the major metropolis that it has become,” Green

says. “Major corporations need to understand that there’s a definite need for the programming and services that our non-profits provide.”

The Health Initiative’s annual budget of $405,000 includes The Rush Center, whose operation is shared with Georgia Equality.

Without The Rush Center included, its budget is approximately $300,000. The bulk of funds come from grants and contracts, all of which are local dollars, except for the federal money coming through SEEDCO for the Affordable Care Act expansion, all of which is earmarked for Georgia, says Health Initiative executive director Linda Ellis. At least 80 percent of its funding goes directly to programming costs.

Ellis says it’s a challenge for southern LGBT organizations because so few local or regional funders are willing to fund LGBT-specific services, and national funding sources that are LGBT-friendly rarely fund projects that don’t have a national reach.

“And when they do fund regionally specific efforts, the South is often overlooked and seen as ‘unwinnable,’” she says. “Our challenge is further compounded by the fact that many funders—including individual donors—still equate LGBT health only with HIV/AIDS.”

LGBT advocacy orgs provide safety nets not offered by states SPARK is a reproductive justice organization that also works in particular to help to LGBT youth of color, as well as women of color and young parents. Their approved 2014 budget is $303,000, primarily of which they get through private support along with grassroots fundraising efforts.

SPARK has three core programs that its budget goes toward: The Fierce Youth Reclaiming & Empowering (FYRE) program that develops the civic leadership of LGBTQQ youth of color and allies in the reproductive justice movement, the Speak Justice Take Action program that informs its base and legislators of key reproductive justices issues, and the Women of Color Organizing and Public Policy Initiative that engages a cohort of emerging women of color reproductive justice and sexual health advocates.

So SPARK has its hands in several different issues affecting multiple segments of people, which can be especially difficult with the funding shortfalls throughout the region.

“Many of the advocacy organizations in the South have to do multiple kinds of work to make up for what the states don’t provide in terms of social safety nets,” SPARK Executive Director Malika Redmond tells GA Voice.

“Organizations need a long-standing investment from funders, which includes longstanding support in the way of general operating expenses.”

Transgender Individuals Living Their

Please see SOUTH, page 12

12 | GA VOICE

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Large foundations located in Northeast, West Coast SOUTH, continued from page 11 Truth, one of the few transgender-led organizations in Georgia, wants to become an official 501c3 non-profit. All the paperwork to do so has been completed, but money, or lack thereof, has kept the organization from applying for the federal tax-exempt status.

“We would like to have a grant yearly,” says founder and executive director Cheryl Courtney-Evans. “We don’t have a budget per se because we don’t have any money. We operate solely on donations.”

Courtney-Evans notes TILTT received a $1,000 grant from the Atlanta-based Lloyd E. Russell Foundation in 2012, and a $2,000 grant from the New York-based Trans Justice Funding Project in 2013, an organization purposely founded to financially assist trans-led organizations.

The money TILTT does receive goes to basic expenses such as paying annual corporation fees, maintaining a website and paying for educational materials needed. Last year grant money was used so TILLT could have its first booth in Piedmont Park during Atlanta Pride to spread awareness of trans issues.

Courtney-Evans says her organization has a unique challenge most other LGBT groups do not face.

“Overall, transgender groups do not get attention from funders,” she says.

Currently TILTT is working with several other organizations in a coalition to fund and maintain housing for transgender people.

“I would love for us to be able to find a property,” Courtney-Evans says. “It doesn’t have to be TILTT-sponsored. It could be a collaboration. We need to open this type of facility. We don’t have any place to go for our own.”

Large funders focus on Northeast or West Coast Georgia Equality’s annual budget is about $300,000 according to Executive Director Jeff Graham, which he says is considerably larger than it was two years ago when the nonprofit struggled to get into the $200,000 to $250,000 range, mostly due to the economic crisis. But he says it’s still a constant challenge to raise funds.

Grants make up approximately $175,000 of GE’s budget, with the remaining $125,000 coming from individual donors.

Graham says a big reason why the funding disparity is so vast is because the large foundations that support LGBT services and advocacy are located in the Northeast or on the West Coast.

“So they will be more in-tune to the needs of their local communities or regions,” he says. This leads to what he calls a “multiplier effect” because those organizations will then hire staff from their own region who, when they do begin funding nationally, will direct it to the agencies, programs and services

they’re most familiar with.

Graham also says so many LGBT organizations in the South have small staffs, “so they will not have the funds and the track record to have an audit and sophisticated accounting procedures in place.”

Graham told the NERP/POSE audience that one of Georgia Equality’s top priorities is being able to pay student interns.

“The internship program is just not fair to those lower income students that don’t have the luxury of being able to work 10 or 20 hours a week without pay,” he says. “We now know we need to be investing in that internship program so that it will be more open and more accessible to all young people, especially lower income people and younger people of color.”

Graham thinks this first step—identifying what the problem is—is just the beginning to solving it.

Once local LGBT nonprofits can start offering not only salaries, but competitive salaries with benefits packages, they’ll be able to com-

pete with bigger, more established organizations around the country.

“That’s what I saw with the HIV organizations in the ‘90s where we had the same problem,” Graham says. “There was a huge effort in the last half of the ‘90s to build the infrastructure of those organizations so they could compete for major federal grants.”

And compete they did, he says. “So that keeps me hopeful that five or 10 years from now it will be a different situation.”

Graham recalls speaking with the Empire State Pride Agenda, Georgia Equality’s New York counterpart, about 10 years ago. The New York group had done a similar report to the Funders for LGBTQ Issues report and realized there were practically no state contracts going to LGBT organizations in New York state.

So Empire State Pride Agenda started working with elected officials to work with state budgets and set aside dollars to serve the LGBT community.

“I believe they now have tens of millions, if not hundreds of millions, coming from the

state budget of New York to serve the LGBT community,” he says. “But it doesn’t happen overnight.”

What now?

National funders and national funding collaborative s are looking at the issue, which is a start. Graham advises people to have a “balanced approach to giving”—give nationally, but be aware that donating some money locally goes directly to working toward equality in Atlanta and Georgia.

He also says that local organizations need to have conversations with local foundations and philanthropic communities to make sure they understand funding for LGBT advocacy and services. He cites the Lloyd E. Russell Roundation in particular.

“We’re so blessed to have that foundation.

They’re committed to building and growing the local community,” he says. “Without them, we would not have the Phillip Rush Center.”

Georgia Equality is also in the midst of a

it

COVER STORY

www.theGAVoice.com $50,000 fundraising campaign for its “Marriage Matters Georgia” initiative to bring awareness about marriage equality to the entire state. This amount can only cover the basics, Graham said, such as polling as well as sharing the stories of Georgia residents as the backbone of its educational campaign.

Graham has said that repeal efforts in other states have cost up to $10 million and more—a price tag that is definitely out of the picture for Georgia right now.

But what about the argument that it’s wiser to devote money where victories are more likely to happen?

“We need to seize momentum and score big wins for the LGBTQ movement where we can, but we also need to ensure no area or group of LGBTQ people is being left behind,” says Lyle Matthew Kan of Funders for LGBTQ Issues.

“We can’t ignore that the South is home to more LGBT adults than any other region of the country,” he continues. “Every LGBTQ person deserves legal equality and societal acceptance even if it isn’t easy or straightforward to achieve,” Kan adds.

Southerners for the Freedom to Marry, a project of the New York-based Freedom to Marry national organization, is a $1 million multi-state initiative to bring the South into the discussion of the national discussion on marriage equality. The money raised from private donations will go to field organizing, social media campaigns and possibly paid advertising.

The kickoff event for the initiative was held in Atlanta last month along with Georgia Equality and Atlanta Mayor Kasim Reed.

The new campaign is the beginning of a much-needed conversation in the South, said Evan Wolfson, founder and president of Freedom to Marry, who attended the event.

“The country is moving forward and we now have the added victory in the Supreme Court which has given us constitutional guidance and have won five federal court rulings in a row, many of them in the South,” Wolfson tells GA Voice.

The South has not been forgotten by larger organizations such as his, and certainly not by the LGBT families that live here, Wolfson adds.

But organizations have to work where they can build on what can be done.

Now, though, thousands of same-sex couples have gotten married in different states and come back home to the South where they now face discrimination. All of this is driving national groups to step up the conversation and ensure the South is included in creating a climate for a “huge national win” that will completely turn the tide, especially on marriage equality.

“Just because the legislature in your state may not be willing to do anything, that doesn’t mean you don’t speak to people, share your stories and become part of that climate that creates change,” Wolfson says.

— Dyana Bagby contributed.

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GA VOICE | 13

top 25 funderS of LGBtQ iSSueS in the South, 2011-2012 4 1.

Elton John AIDS Foundation

(New York, NY)

$1,308,000

2.

Arcus Foundation

$950,000

3.

Susan G. Komen Foundation

$823,268

Black Tie Dinner

$735,918

5.

Anonymous

$675,000

6.

Houston Endowment

$530,000

7.

Tides Foundation/State Equality Fund 5

$433,000

Miami Foundation

$417,400

Ford Foundation

$400,000

Community Foundation of Broward

$358,211

GE Foundation

$350,000

Amy Mandel & Katina Rodis Fund

$259,025

Wells Fargo Foundation

$251,731

Astraea Lesbian Foundation for Justice

$226,300

Our Fund

$224,802

16.

Freeman Foundation

$204,500

17.

Aqua Foundation for Women

$179,000

18.

Foundation for the Carolinas

$176,415

The Community Foundation for Greater Atlanta

$141,400

Z. Smith Reynolds Foundation

$135,000

PFLAG/Hatch Youth Scholarship Foundation

$131,139

22.

AIDS United

$123,750

23.

Hollyfield Foundation

$108,733

24.

Liberty Hill Foundation/Queer Youth Fund 6

$103,767

David Bohnett Foundation

$95,042

4.

8.

9.

10.

11.

12.

13.

14.

15.

19.

20.

21.

25.

(New York, NY) (Dallas, TX) (Dallas, TX)

(Various Locations) (Dallas, TX)

(San Francisco, CA) (Miami, FL)

(New York, NY)

(Fort Lauderdale, FL) (Fairfield, CT)

(Asheville, NC)

(San Francisco, CA) (New York, NY)

(Fort Lauderdale, FL) (SC)

(Miami, FL)

(Charlotte, NC) (Atlanta, GA)

(Winston-Salem, NC) (Houston, TX)

(Washington, DC) (Houston, TX)

(Los Angeles, CA)

(Beverly HIlls, CA)

4 These figures include dollars awarded to intermediaries for re-granting purposes.

5 The State Equality Fund is a collaborative funding partnership of The Gill Foundation, Evelyn and Walter Haas Jr. Fund, an anonymous donor, and the Ford Foundation. The collaborative is staffed by The Gill Foundation and operates as a donor-advised fund with Tides Foundation.

6 The Queer Youth Fund is a collaborative of several donors housed as a donor-advised fund at Liberty Hill. As of 2011, contributing donors to the fund were Ralph Alpert, Johnson Family Foundation, Weston Milliken, Palette Fund, and Threshold Foundation.

14 | GA VOICE

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GA VOICE | 15

Activists: ‘Religious freedom’ bills part of national backlash against LGBT people Ga. political organizer urge support for gay-friendly candidates to stave off future anti-gay bills

By PATRICK SAUNDERS The 152nd edition of the Georgia General Assembly was one of the more politically engaged sessions for the LGBT community, in part due to the highly controversial “Preservation of Religious Freedom” bills in the House and Senate.

Both bills are considered dead, but LGBT lobbyists are keeping an eye out until Sine Die on March 20 to ensure the bills don’t pop up as an amendment on a different piece of legislation.

House Bill 1023 was introduced by state Rep. Sam Teasley (R-Marietta) and Senate Bill 377 was introduced by state Sen. Josh McKoon (R-Columbus). Both of their bills were variations on the “Preservation of Religious Freedom” bills introduced in Arizona, Mississippi and other states. Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer vetoed the so-called “religious freedom” bill after outcry from activists as well as many corporations.

McKoon and Teasley have said their bills are based on the federal Religious Freedom Restoration Act (or “RFRA”) signed into law in 1993 by President Clinton.

RFRA Perils, a website dedicated to educating the public on such legislation, notes that there are currently 12 states with pending state RFRA bills in consideration.

‘HARD TO BELIEVE THIS IS PURELY CHANCE’

The timing of such similar anti-gay bills being introduced across the country around the same time raised eyebrows. The Alliance Defending Freedom legal firm is a far right conservative organization that has been accused in the past of being a “bill mill”— an organization known for crafting socially conservative legislation and pushing it out to political leaders across the country.

“It’s so highly coincidental that the language would be so similar in so many states at the same time that’s it hard for me to believe that is purely chance,” said Georgia Equality Executive Director Jeff Graham on March 9 at the Northeast Regional Prides/ Prides of the Southeast Joint Conference at The W Midtown – Atlanta.

“We were in many ways unprepared for this,” Graham added. “So you know when any piece of legislation has such similar lan-

guage and such similar talking points, that there is some strategy behind it. So we do have an organized opposition that is trying to hit us.”

What the conservative right wing is trying to hit LGBT people and others with “is this fact that the First Amendment does not cover people’s religious beliefs, which we all know is ridiculous,” Graham said.

“Here in Georgia, that’s what the talking points were. Those were really nice talking points, but a big lie. We’ve got to be shrewd enough to look beyond their lies. This is a preemptive strike in my mind to try and prevent the enactment of further nondiscrimination policies on the state and local levels,” Graham said.

McKoon could not be reached for an interview with GA Voice, but in a Twitter exchange on March 4 that included GA Voice, he stated, “I’m sad that Georgia turned its back on the First Amendment today.”

McKoon also defended his bill by tweeting, “because this bill isn’t a labor/employment bill. This bill is simply giving GA it’s own RFRA” and also “To the extent discrimination on basis of sexual orientation is legal SB 377 does nothing to enlarge/reduce it.” McKoon also noted correctly, “sexual orientation is not a protected class under GA law” and added, “SB 377 in no way impacts this.”

McKoon also said he had been working on this bill since last year and it had nothing to do with discriminating against LGBT people. Instead h e

gave the example of the news he heard of a student forced to “stomp on a photo of Jesus” and when the student denied, he was expelled.

According to Inside Higher Ed, however, a professor at Florida Atlantic University told students to write the word “Jesus” on a piece of paper, fold it, and then stomp on the paper as part of an exercise. A Church of Latter-day Saints student refused in the voluntary exercise and complained about it. Reports that the student was expelled were denied by the university which also stated that the exercise would not be used again. “This is [about] Govt trampling individual freedom,” McKoon stated on Twitter.

WHAT ‘RELIGIOUS FREEDOM’ BILLS ACTUALLY ENTAIL

Debate over the bills in various legislatures suggests they are largely motivated by a desire to allow an individual to express opposition to same-sex marriages by refusing to bake a wedding cake or provide wedding photography.

But the bills are written such that they create a gaping hole in human rights laws, enabling people to circumvent laws banning discrimination based on race, ethnic origin, sex, and every other classification, including sexual orientation and gender identity. And they could enable a person to cite religious motivations in a wide range of activities, such as withholding medical care, refusing to pay back interest on a loan, or denying service in a hotel or restaurant.

Supporters of the religious bias bills have repeatedly characterized them as being nearly identical to the federal RFRA and various state bills that have already enacted.

But they’re not the same, and many lawmakers in most states appear to have grasped the difference.

The federal law, the Religious Freedom Restoration Act of 1993, said, “The government shall not substantially burden a person’s exercise of religion even if the burden results from a rule of general applicability” unless “it is in furtherance of a compelling governmental interest” and represents “the least restrictive means of furthering that compelling governmental interest.”

The Act states “the term ‘exercise of religion’ means exercise of religion under the first article of amendment to the Constitution of the United States.” In 1997, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled, in Boerne v. Flores, that the act was “a considerable congressional intrusion into the states’ traditional prerogatives and general authority to regulate the health and welfare of their citizens.”

A law enacted last year by the Kentucky legislature following an override of the governor’s veto is very similar to the federal law except that it adds that the government may not burden a person’s religious beliefs indirectly through such means as “withholding benefits, assessing penalties, or an exclusion from programs or access to facilities.” That additional language would appear to be useful to a religiously run hospital that wanted to refuse same-sex partner visitation and still collect federal governmental support.

And there was considerable opposition to the Kentucky bill, opposition that expresses many of the same objections being heard to this year’s bills. The Kentucky County Judge/Executive Association said the bill could enable public employees to refuse certain assignments and “open the door to spurious claims by inmates” regarding their food, medical treatment, and worship needs.

The Kentucky League of Cities warned that it could jeopardize the enforcement of laws of general applicability regarding health, safety, and welfare. The Kentucky Association of Sexual Assault Programs said religious beliefs have often been used by family members to justify abuse of women and children and that this new law would make that easier. The Kentucky human rights commission said the law could be used by members of one religion to deny housing to members of another religion; that a restaurant owner of one race could use it to deny service to a patron of another race.

Please see GOLD DOME, page 16

16 | GA VOICE

03.14.14

NEWS

www.theGAVoice.com

States with RFRA bills as of Feb. 2014 • Alabama (constitutional amendment) • Arizona • Connecticut • Florida • Idaho • Illinois • Kansas • Kentucky • Louisiana • Missouri • New Mexico • Oklahoma • Pennsylvania • Rhode Island • South Carolina • Tennessee • Texas • Virginia Josh McKoon (Official photo)

Continued from GOLD DOME, page 15

‘A LICENSE TO DISCRIMINATE’

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Brad Clark, from the national office of the Human Rights Campaign, had strong words about this type of legislation at the March 9 panel discussion.

“This is probably our opposition’s newest form of organizing—looking at so-called religious liberties and saying that you can do whatever the hell you want based on any deeply held religious beliefs,” he told the crowd. “It’s clearly a license to discriminate against LGBT people.”

A confluence of events the week of Feb. 24 doomed both Georgia bills. First, there was a Feb. 25 judicial subcommittee hearing on HB 1023, which was flooded with 150 people ready to speak out against the bill. The majority of the crowd even waited through a three-hour delay to get their chance to hear the bill.

Graham said it was the most people that had shown up to voice their opposition to a bill since the 2004 same-sex marriage ban.

“That was phenomenal,” he says. “That got the attention of everyone at the Capitol.

Everybody knew that something had happened that afternoon.”

A flurry of phone calls and emails to representatives followed, and one-by-one, major corporations like Coca-Cola, IHG, Delta Air Lines and others issued statements in opposition to such bills, no doubt spurred on by the nationwide media attention focused on a similar bill ultimately vetoed in Arizona.

Teasley and McKoon finally publicly acknowledged the unlikelihood that their bills would pass before Crossover Day on March 2—the day a bill has to pass in one chamber before “crossing over” into the other chamber to be considered for a vote.

Regardless, activists are not taking any

Source: RFRA Perils chances. Either bill could be tacked on as an amendment to a bill awaiting passage and could slip through before the end of the current session on March 20.

“Josh McKoon says he still has plans on pushing for it” and will re-introduce in in the next session Graham tells GA Voice.

“We are taking those threats very seriously.”

Georgia Equality is in the process of trying to identify any potential bill that could be the vehicle for such a maneuver.

Typically there are a flurry of bills and amendments on the final day of the session, so it’s easy for something to be overlooked.

But if no bill is forced through by midnight on March 20 (which Graham calls “the most dangerous hours for us”), the next step is to keep an eye on two Supreme Court cases involving the federal bill that these vaguely resemble.

CASES AND RACES TO WATCH

Two federal cases—Sebelius v. Hobby Lobby Stores and Conestoga Wood Specialties v. Sebelius—have been consolidated and oral arguments will be heard on March 25 by the U.S. Supreme Court. The cases both address whether the contraceptive mandate of the Affordable Care Act violates the religious rights of secular corporations and their owners.

The court is being asked to apply its interpretation of the federal RFRA to resolve the claims. The Supreme Court will make a ruling specifically on the constitutional concept of giving individual rights to free expression of religious briefs to corporations, Graham says.The outcome of this now sole case could play a role in local “religious freedom” bills.

“They’ll rule by June, then we’ll have a much better understanding of what the federal law allows, and where there might be potential gaps that people may be interested

NEWS

www.theGAVoice.com in trying to fill with future legislation,” Graham says.

After that come the November elections, with numerous races on the local and state level to decide, including several openly gay candidates either running for reelection or for the first time (see sidebar), and races for governor and senator.

Openly gay lawyer Kyle Williams, endorsed by Georgia Equality and the national Gay & Lesbian Victory Fund, faces opposition from former state Rep. Elena Parent in the Democratic primary on May 20. The two are vying to fill the seat being vacated by Jason Carter, the Democratic challenger to Gov. Nathan Deal.

Graham says it’s vitally important to do everything we can to elect the individuals that “are going to have our backs” on bills like the anti-gay ones proposed this session.

For instance, take House Bill 990. This bill takes the authorization to accept federal funds for the Medicaid expansion under the ACA out of the hands of Gov. Deal and puts it in the hands of the legislature. This makes it an even harder path to accept the federal funds that will insure over 600,000 lower income Georgia residents (many of whom are LGBT) and bring in a flood of jobs and revenue into the state. The bill made it through to the other chamber on Crossover Day and was still being considered at press time Tuesday.

“It clearly shows that the legislature doesn’t trust the governor to make decisions, and frankly I think it shows that they’re ter-

Sam Teasley (Official photo)

rified that Jason Carter may actually be the next governor,” Graham told GA Voice.

For his part, state Sen. Carter was not amused by the bill, which now goes before him and his state senate colleagues for a final vote.

“To me, it is more evidence that he’s [Gov. Nathan Deal] doing everything he can in refusing the responsibility of leadership,” Carter told the AJC’s Political Insider. “It’s an unbelievable example of him passing the buck.”

Graham says having openly gay representatives like state Reps. Simone Bell and Karla

Drenner in office is what helped the “religious freedom” bills fail.

“Having Rep. Bell and Rep. Drenner talking to their colleagues about this—we don’t have the one-on-one relationships they do,” Graham says. “That helped in the House then trickled over into the Senate.”

What also helped was the turnout at the Capitol for the HB 1023 hearing and the thousands of calls and emails people made to their representatives.

“They need to take that same action to voter efforts,” Graham says. “We need to elect more fair minded people to all levels of government They need to put that same level of enthusiasm that they showed in the last two weeks to electing better people.”

Graham also mentioned that three times as many people responded to Georgia Equality’s action alert on religious freedom bills as did on state Rep. Karla Drenner’s Fair Employment Practices Act, a bill that would protect LGBT state workers, pointing out that the community needs to have the same level of response for proactive pieces of legislation as the ones that we’re reacting to.

Gautam Raghavan, White House liaison to the LGBT community, told the crowd at the NERP/POSE LGBT equality discussion panel on March 9 that LGBT people need to expand the tent if more progress is to be seen.

“The opportunity that’s in front of us is that in the coming years, we can define the issues that matter to our humanity,” Raghavan said. “I think we have an opportunity to

03.14.14

GA VOICE | 17

Gay candidates running in 2014 • State Rep. Karla Drenner faces no opposition in her reelection campaign this year. She is endorsed by Georgia Equality and the national Gay & Lesbian Victory Fund.

• State Rep. Simone Bell is opposed in the Democratic primary by Erica Morris Long. Bell is endorsed by Georgia Equality and the Victory Fund.

• State Rep. Keisha Waites is running unopposed and is endorsed by Georgia Equality and the Victory Fund.

• Kyle Williams is running for state Senate District 42, the seat held by Jason Carter. He faces opposition from former state Rep. Elena Parent in the May 20 Democratic primary. If elected, Williams would be the first openly gay man elected to the state Senate. He is endorsed by Georgia Equality and the Victory Fund.

• Bob Gibeling is running for state House District 54, which includes Buckhead. He faces no opposition in the Democratic primary. He is endorsed by Georgia Equality.

• Joan Garner is seeking reelection to the Fulton County Commission. She faces opposition from fellow Democrat Lee Brewster. Garner is endorsed

by Georgia Equality and the Victory Fund.

work in coalition with other communities that have been showing up at our fights, and now we need to show up at theirs.”

— Lisa Keen and Dyana Bagby contributed.

18 | GA VOICE

03.14.14

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EDITORIAL

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THE GEORGIA VOICE

PO Box 77401 | Atlanta, GA 30357 404-815-6941 | www.thegavoice.com

EDITORIAL

Editor: Dyana Bagby dbagby@thegavoice.com Deputy Editor: Patrick Saunders psaunders@thegavoice.com

Art Director: Mike Ritter mritter@thegavoice.com

CONTRIBUTORS

Adam Carpenter, Melissa Carter, Jim Farmer, Vandy Beth Glenn, Shannon Hames, Steve Warren, Ryan Lee, Tina Tian

BUSINESS

Publisher: Tim Boyd tboyd@thegavoice.com Managing Partner: Christina Cash ccash@thegavoice.com Sales Manager: Marshall Graham mgraham@thegavoice.com Sales Executive: Anne Clarke aclarke@thegavoice.com Business Advisor: Lynn Pasqualetti Financial Firm of Record: HLM Financial Group National Advertising: Rivendell Media, 908-232-2021 sales@rivendellmedia.com

FINE PRINT

All material in the Georgia Voice is protected by federal copyright law and may not be reproduced without the written consent of the Georgia Voice. The sexual orientation of advertisers, photographers, writers and cartoonists published herein is neither inferred nor implied. The appearance of names or pictorial representation does not necessarily indicate the sexual orientation of that person or persons. We also do not accept responsibility for claims made by advertisers.

Unsolicited editorial material is accepted by the Georgia Voice, but we do not take responsibility for its return.

The editors reserve the right to accept, reject or edit any submission. Guidelines for freelance contributors are available upon request.

A single copy of the Georgia Voice is available from authorized distribution points. Multiple copies are available from the Georgia Voice office only. Call for rates. If you are unable to reach a convenient free distribution point, you may receive a 26-issue mailed subscription for $60 per year. Checks or credit card orders can be sent to Tim Boyd, tboyd@thegavoice.com Postmaster: Send address changes to the Georgia Voice, PO Box 77401, Atlanta, GA 30357. The Georgia Voice is published every other Friday by The Georgia Voice, LLC. Individual subscriptions are $60 per year for 26 issues.

Postage paid at Atlanta, GA, and additional mailing offices.

The editorial positions of the Georgia Voice are expressed in editorials and in editor’s notes. Other opinions are those of the writers and do not necessarily represent the opinion of the Georgia Voice and its staff.

To submit a letter or commentary: Letters should be fewer than 400 words and commentary, for web or print, should be fewer than 750 words. Submissions may be edited for content and length, and must include a name, address and phone number for verification. Email submissions to editor@thegavoice.com or mail to the address above.

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03.14.14

GA VOICE | 19

GA VOICES OUR OPINION EDITORIAL

Finding our identities in the LGBT equality movement

GA Voice’s ‘first term’ is over; Four more years!

By DYANA BAGBY It was a cold, rainy Valentine’s Day just over a decade ago when some 1,000 people gathered on the steps of the Georgia Capitol.

They were there to protest the General Assembly’s desire to enshrine discrimination into the state’s constitution with an amendment to prohibit same-sex marriage.

I remember that day pretty well. It was my first LGBT rally after moving to Atlanta just a few years prior so I could live my life as my true self. And I was enjoying this new sense of freedom I didn’t even know existed for so many years.

But then this happened—lawmakers were tripping over themselves in state after state after state to pass constitutional amendments to ban same-sex marriage, get them on the ballot, and feed their base the red meat it needed to ensure the anti-gay, anti-progressives showed up at the polls in November to vote. It worked. And it was a staggering loss for LGBT people in Georgia and many other states that year.

A clipping from the now defunct Southern Voice newspaper at the time described the scene like this: Gays have turned out in record numbers to oppose the amendment, including an estimated 1,000 people who braved cold and damp weather to attend a Valentine’s Day rally hosted by Don’t Amend Atlanta, a grassroots group.

“It was amazing to see such a crowd, especially considering the weather,” said Bradley Smith, one of the rally’s organizers. “People were very passionate and I think if nothing else it motivated people to get involved, and realize this is a serious battle.”

Atlanta City Council President Cathy Woolard encouraged attendees to take time to observe the day of love, and vowed to lead the public campaign against the amendment if it goes to voters.

Gays, lesbians and their allies need to “make so much noise that they will never try

to do this again,” Woolard said.

[State Rep. Karla] Drenner also stuck to a loving theme.

“Love is the foundation of morality,” she told the crowd. “Love always triumphs over hatred—there is no power in hatred.”

Georgia Equality will continue hosting lobby days at the Capitol to try to woo House members, and Don’t Amend Atlanta is continuing to get the word out to gays to encourage their friends and family members to contact legislators.

I remember being impressed with the crowd, these people so dedicated they were willing to stand out in the rain to make their voices heard, to ensure they were seen as a group.

More than 10 years later, I’m the editor of the GA Voice. And a decade later we have seen significant strides toward equality with 17 states and the District of Columbia passing marriage equality bills. Dozens of states include protections for LGBT residents, and the president publicly supports same-sex marriage. It’s almost like we live in a differ-

Last month, a group of bipartisan lawmakers in Georgia jumped on the bandwagon to pass “religious freedom” bills that were also tagged as “turn the gays away” bills. Luckily, the bills didn’t pass this session thanks in large part to the outpouring of LGBT people and allies ...

ent world. But what happened 10 years ago is still taking place today.

Last month, a group of bipartisan lawmakers in Georgia jumped on the bandwagon to pass “religious freedom” bills that were also tagged as “turn the gays away” bills. Luckily, the bills didn’t pass this session thanks in large part to the outpouring of LGBT people and allies who showed up at the Capitol and called and emailed their representatives at the urging, once again, of Georgia Equality.

It also didn’t hurt when major corporations such as Delta Air Lines and Coca-Cola said the bills were bad for business.

Again, we came together and this time we won. But must we only come together when there is something horrible about to happen? Can’t we also come together to support something positive for our community—a fair employment bill proposed by state Sen. Karla Drenner, an anti-bullying bill supported by state Rep. Keisha Waites. Georgia Equality Executive Director Jeff Graham posed that question after the successful defeat of the “religious freedom” bills, and he has a very good point.

At a recent press conference where Atlanta Mayor Kasim Reed kicked off the Southerners for the Freedom to Marry initiative (how’s that for progress, too?), a local TV reporter said he felt Atlanta’s LGBT community wasn’t very active—maybe we weren’t angry enough.

During my four years with the GA Voice, I’ve seen both sides of this. I’ve been to many rallies and events where I’ve been inspired by the numbers and the passion. I’ve also been to others and wondered why the room or the street or the block wasn’t packed with people to either celebrate or protest.

As a people who make up many LGBT communities, we have many different identities. My hope has always been that the role of a newspaper is to bring these identities together so we can all learn from each other.

GA Voice has been around for four years.

Our identity is still young and maturing, but it has one main goal—to inform our readers and engage them in participating in our various communities. We do a good job of that already. We plan to do better in the next four years and beyond.

22 | GA VOICE

NEWS

03.14.14

4th ANNIVERSAY

By the Numbers

SOCIAL MEDIA NUMBERS

7,827 Twitter 5,235 followers tweets 10,064 Total 4,500+ Facebook likes

Newsletter/email subscribers

PUBLICATIONS

printed per year 26 Issues (we’re a bi-weekly) 550,000

Total GA Voice pages printed in 2013

6,500 Atlanta Gay

Wedding Guides distributed in 2013

10,000 Destination Gay Atlanta distributed in 2013

3,000 Out on Film festival guide distributed

TOP 5

www.theGAVoice.com

largest issues in 2013: Atlanta Pride, Best of Atlanta, Gift Guide issue, Black Gay Pride and our Anniversary issue.

GA VOICE WEBSITE (www.thegavoice.com)

.. .. . . .. . .

Total page views since 2010: 6.7

million Total page views for the past year: 1.57 million

TOP STORIES FROM MARCH 2013-MARCH 2014

168,128 page views 2013 Best of Atlanta Finalists: 121,541 Mitch Grassi on being gay in Pentatonix

God, guns, GOP and Georgia: State lawmakers hell bent on passing ‘preservation of religious of freedom act’: 40,005

The road to country music’s first openly gay star: 25,031

Must sees for your Netflix account: 19,217 Breaking: Chef Ria Pell dies: 13,613 A dyke in love with a gay man who is trans: 12,584

That’s What She Said: Melissa Carter on listeners turning the channel

after learning she is gay: 11,794

.. ..

TOP STORIES SINCE 2010

Mitch Grassi on being gay in Pentatonix: 197,991 page views The road to country music’s first openly gay star: 110,092

82,235

2013 Best of Atlanta finalists: 2013 Must sees for your

.

Netflix account: 61,486 Honey Boo Boo’s gay Uncle Poodle speaks out

.

for gay rednecks: 41,764

. .

God, guns, GOP and Georgia: State lawmakers hell bent on passing ‘preservation of religious of freedom act’: 40,005

Missing Ga. lesbian found dead,

according to girlfriend: 37,628

2012 Best of Atlanta: 36,213

s

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NEWS

03.14.14

GA VOICE | 23

This gal got a birthday makeover Bigger & bolder, new GA Voice website debuts

By PATRICK SAUNDERS While some things about GA Voice haven’t changed over the last four years—our dedication to honest, hard-nosed reporting on the issues that affect your daily life, a promise to tell your stories in the right way—that doesn’t mean we’re against changing other things in order to give you a bigger and better LGBT news source every minute of every day.

So you might have noticed a recent change we made that’s been in the works for quite awhile, with you in mind: the introduction of our brand new website!

We wanted to point out some of the changes and additions we made so you know all of the tools available for you, wherever you want, whenever you want. And let us know how we can make your online experience better, because remember, GA Voice is your LGBT community news source.

Bigger, bolder navigation bar offering you more options, quicker. Hover your mouse over each section and an interactive dropdown menu will appear, allowing you access to the content you want in a flash.

Breaking news bar gives you all the latest updates as we publish them to the site. For those who check the site multiple times a day, this is where you want to look first for the latest.

Dominant slideshow image is the first thing you’ll notice above the fold on your screen. This gives you a graphically appealing, constantly updated selection of our latest and/or biggest stories we think you’ll want to see.

Six sections of stories to choose from with the first two being—of course—local and national news, followed by culture, best bets, photo gallery and video gallery.

This gives you a little bit more indepth look at the content waiting for you no matter what you’re in the mood for.

The blogroll gives you a snapshot of what’s going on in the national LGBT blogosphere today.

You’ll find some of of your favorite blogs here, and you just might find new ones to follow as well.

Want to go on your own search? Click the magnifying glass and enter whatever term you like and you’ll find the story you’re looking for.

Prominent social media buttons for you to like, follow and add us across multiple platforms, so you never miss the latest in LGBT news.

More prominent placement of the Most Popular and Most Commented stories of the day. Find out what’s trending today before you fall behind.

Separate boxes to like us on Facebook, follow us on Twitter and add us on Google Plus. Also check out the live Twitter feed for a glimpse of what you’ll get with a follow.

And of course, don’t forget all of our wonderful advertisers in select spots throughout the site. We couldn’t do this every day without them, or you.

24 | GA VOICE

03.14.14

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

www.theGAVoice.com

Atlanta gay artist’s quest uncovers Keith Haring art ‘Mr. Snail’ last remaining piece of larger mural at Grady pediatric ER

By DYANA BAGBY Matthew Terrell, noted widely in Atlanta for his amazing photography work for the nationally critically acclaimed “Legendary Children” exhibit featuring many of the city’s emerging drag queens, took his art in another direction when he decided to research everything he could on Keith Haring, the world famous, gay and HIV-positive artist whose work is instantly recognizable.

Terrell’s months of study and poring over papers, documents, videos, films, interviews and more paid off when he uncovered one small journal entry stating the the artist, who died in 1990, had paid a visit to Atlanta two years before his death where he painted one of his renowned murals.

Terrell continued to search for more information and finally uncovered that Haring had painted a large mural at Grady Hospital’s Pediatric ER Unit.

However, expansion and construction meant the mural was destroyed—except for one piece, known as “Mr. Snail,” which was kept in storage for two decades. Soon, thanks to Terrell’s efforts, “Mr. Snail” will find a new home at the new underground art gallery of Hughes Spalding Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta hospital.

An Ideal Capital grant recipient, Terrell wrote about his journey to find Mr. Snail for the HuffPost Gay Voice blog.

Terrell spoke to GA Voice about his journey and his desire for all of us to appreciate the work Haring created.

GAVO: So, it was just one small notation about Haring working in Atlanta that sent you on this quest?

Terrell: I spent several months devouring any material I could find about Keith Haring— art books, biographies, his journals, scratchy YouTube documentaries, etc. In all this reading, the South only came up once—it was a note in his journals at the end of 1988. It said “Permanent Mural, Grady Pediatric Emergency Room, Atlanta” After reading about Haring’s exploits across the world, I had to discover what he’d done in my own backyard. That one little sentence led me to come face-to-face with a piece of work produced by one of my artistic heroes.

What is it about Haring that speaks to you the most?

Keith Haring prioritized speaking to the masses through his work. He created a visual language of childlike cartoons that spoke to

Mr. Snail, once part of a large Keith Haring mural located in the pediatric unit at Grady Hospital, has found a new home at Hughes Spalding Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta. (Photo by Matthew Terrell)

people around the world. Haring placed his works in public places, in mass mediums like MTV, and on Pop Shop mass-market items. I respect his drive to bring his artwork into the mainstream—I think a great artist should want his work to be experienced by as many people as possible. As a writer and photographer, I hope to bring my work to the masses as well as Haring did.

What were the emotions you felt when finding Mr. Snail? The reactions from the people who had been keeping Mr. Snail when you found them?

Despite being incredibly dirty, I couldn’t believe how bright Mr. Snail was after all these years. He looked as happy and cheerful as all of the Haring paintings I’d pored over all summer, and I couldn’t believe I was holding him in my arms. When I saw Mr. Snail, I thought back to all the hours of reading and thousands of pages of text I’d consumed with no greater purpose than simple interest. I realized all that work brought me to this fragment, and I was so happy to help Mr. Snail find his way home.

Why is it important to preserve this piece of art?

Mr. Snail symbolizes Keith Haring’s brief time here in the deep South. Haring did most of his work up north and abroad, and the Grady mural was the only Haring piece in our area.

After his death, many people lost interest in his work, and his remaining murals were often left to decay. Even if we don’t have the original mural, preserving Mr. Snail honors Haring’s work in Atlanta. Placing Mr. Snail in the hallway where patients travel through to receive treatment satisfied Haring’s intention of brightening the lives of sick children.

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EATING MYWORDS by CLIFF BOSTOCK

‘For the seafood lover in you’

Red Lobster may taste OK, but if you are counting calories be careful My friend Tommy, toting a bag of leftovers, rushed across the lobby of the huge, packed restaurant near Northlake Mall and greeted me, laughing. “I’m going to tell the whole world,” he said, “that you’re eating at Red Lobster.”

Yeah, I’ve written restaurant reviews for over 30 yeas and you’d think I’d know I wasn’t about to get the world’s best meal. But it wasn’t my fault. I dine with a group of friends every Friday and they insisted we go. It was revenge for the awful restaurant I took them to the week before.

Some background: We started dining together after a spontaneous meal at Longhorn Steakhouse four years ago. Yes, Longhorn’s food is acceptable in that predictably unadventurous, middle-American way. But it doesn’t hold a candle to many of the city’s often-cheaper restaurants, especially ethnic venues.

Red Lobster, not surprisingly, is operated by the same group, Darden Restaurants, that owns Longhorn and Olive Garden, among others.

Once upon a time, the restaurants were quite successful, but profits have dropped dramatically in the last few years. We’re talking declines of 40-plus percent, especially at Red Lobster.

Why? There are three reasons. First, the restaurants are not really inexpensive, so they were hard-hit by the still-sputtering economy.

There are cheaper, no-tip restaurants in the casual-dining format. Think Chipotle and Panera.

Second, quality has become a big deal for many consumers. They want healthier alternatives.

Third, the restaurants offended many when Darden tried to avoid Obamacare.

The low profits have motivated Darden to put Red Lobster on the market. Meanwhile, the company has allegedly worked to offer healthier options.

Be all that as it may, we found the Northlake restaurant packed, and there was very little that looked particularly healthy on the menu. We dined there during its annual Lobsterfest and four of us ordered from its special menu.

My choice was the Lobster in Paradise. It included a split, Maine lobster tail fried in coconut batter; skewered grilled shrimp; and a creamy lobster-and-shrimp “bake” topped with crushed macadamia nuts. It came with the famous cheddar biscuits and a Caesar salad. All other dishes at the table were variations, most featuring baked instead of fried lobster tails. There was also the classic Surf and Turf with a seafoodstuffed lobster tail and a sirloin steak topped with lobster meat and a hollandaise sauce.

Red Lobster is facing tough financial times and is trying to focus on health—but when a meal comes in at 2,100 calories, this goal may not be working out. (Photo via Red Lobster)

How’d it taste? Disturbingly, it wasn’t bad, but here’s why: huge quantities of fat, sugar and salt. You could fry a cheap hot dog in coconut batter or drench it in hollandaise and it would taste pretty good. My entrée included 1,130 calories. I ate three biscuits, 450 calories, and added a dessert of red velvet cake stuffed in a jar with chocolate bits, 550 calories. That’s 2,130 calories, not including my Caesar salad—more than you need in an entire day! God knows what the Surf and Turf added up to.

What else is there to report? The restaurant was obviously under-staffed and our servers, although super-friendly, couldn’t quite pull it all together. For example, when our entrees arrived, the server brought me the wrong dish.

She took it back to the kitchen. I waited. And waited. I got angry with the server. I waited.

My friends were at least halfway through their entrees before mine arrived.

To its credit, the restaurant didn’t charge me for my meal—something that’s become quite unusual in our city, no matter how much an order is screwed up.

Red Lobster retains a loyal following, but the truth is that you can get far better lobster around town, sometimes for less money. One example is the lobster-special at Crawfish Shack (4337 Buford Hwy., 404- 929-6789). It’s also worth noting that off-the-boat lobster prices are lower than they have been in years, but most restaurants aren’t really reflecting that. Grocery stores do, though, so if you get a craving, you might want to cook your own.

I suspect Red Lobster (3937 Lavista Road, 770934-2645) won’t be around much longer, or they will be difficult to find. If you want 2,000-plus calories in one meal, you probably should hurry on over.

Cliff Bostock, PhD, offers workshops and individual life coaching. Upcoming workshops include one on gay aging and one on the psychology of taste. 404-518-4415.

www.theGAVoice.com

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Former ‘Mayor of Midtown’ talks Outwrite, AJC Decatur Book Fest and being a survivor

By PATRICK SAUNDERS In January 2012, after 18 years of being the anchor of gay Atlanta and facing mounting debt and a customer base with new buying habits, Outwrite Bookstore & Coffeehouse declared bankruptcy and shut down. And with that, the “Mayor of Midtown” resigned.

But it didn’t take long for former Outwrite owner Philip Rafshoon to resurface in a different role that allows him to impact the community—as programming director for the ever popular AJC Decatur Book Festival.

Rafshoon was hesitant to take the job at first—after such a tumultuous couple years, he didn’t want to go back into books. But sage advice from a dying father will get you to rethink things. Now he’s in the middle of his second year with the festival as they gear up to present their ninth annual event this Labor Day Weekend.

We checked in with Rafshoon to talk about those final days at Outwrite, what he would have done differently, what he misses (and doesn’t miss) about it, what his life is like now and what he’s got coming up next.

GAVO: Now that it’s been a couple of years since Outwrite closed and you have some distance from it, can you talk a little bit about what that whole experience was like towards the end?

RAFSHOON: It was very tough. It’s hard to see something that matters to so many people, that you put so much energy and enthusiasm and sweat into making a success, go away . I’m very proud of what we accomplished in the 18 years we were there. We became a focal point for the community and the neighborhood, and we were probably the most visible openly gay business in the state, if not the entire southeast. But the ending was rough. The numbers didn’t add up.

What do you miss most about it?

For so many people, Outwrite was an experience. The toughest thing for me was knowing that it wasn’t there for them, and something they had depended on for so long couldn’t happen anymore. I miss the people that came in on a regular basis. I miss being able to serve the community every day, the constant new things happening, the excitement of a great event we’d be putting on. I worked with a great staff. But life if pretty short and you have to move on to the next step.

What I don’t miss is working every single day of the week [laughs]. By the end, it was a 24/7 job and we were still doing great events and serving people well, but behind the scenes it was a personal nightmare financially.

Is there anything you would have done differently in those last couple of years?

I would have raised a big flag and done a

So how did the Decatur Book Festival job come about?

When I closed the store, I looked at a lot of different options for what to do with my life.

[Decatur Book Festival Executive Director] Daren Wang called and asked me if I would be interested and I said absolutely not. I didn’t want to be involved in books.

A couple of other offers came around, then Daren followed up and asked again. It was late 2012 and it was about the time my father was getting very sick. He was President Carter’s campaign photographer and was really involved in the arts. We talked about it—he was close to being on his deathbed at that point— and he said, “You really gotta take this job.” So I went back and said I’d do it, and it’s been a wonderful choice.

Philip Rafshoon, former owner of Outwrite Bookstore & Coffeehouse and current programming director of the AJC Decatur Book Festival, recalls that the iconic Midtown spot was not just a bookstore but an experience. (Photo by Patrick Saunders)

Midtown and experience that on their corner in their neighborhood, in their community. But I’m confident that there will be a place for it somehow, somewhere.

community awareness campaign before the company started to get into debt. The debt made it impossible for us to function and make needed improvements. Even though we had strong community support, it was too big of a hole to get out of.

One of the big things that has come of age in the past two or three years is crowdsourcing. I probably could have done that a couple of years earlier. But I think no matter what we did, the end results would’ve been the same—we had accumulated too much debt. There are very few bookstores left in the world focused on the LGBT community.

What is something that Outwrite provided that the community is missing and has yet to be replaced?

In the Atlanta area it’s tough. There are institutions that are filling some of that role. Charis Books does a great job with author events. There are events at Savannah College of Art and Design (SCAD) that include some of our [LGBT] authors.

The Decatur Book Festival has a strong LGBT track and I’m proud of that.

On a daily basis, bringing the local and national LGBT authors—it would be nice to see that happen in a bigger way. That was one of the things that we were really proud of and that was really unique. To help build new LGBT writers’ audiences and bring authors from all over the country and the world into the store. I know that people loved being able to walk into

You were known as the “Mayor of Midtown” for so long and have taken a step back from that spotlight. What has that transition been like for you personally?

That is a very good question. [Pauses] The work I’m doing now is a different kind of work.

It’s a lot more solitary. I had 18 years as what some people call the “Mayor of Midtown” and it’s a different experience not doing that every day. When there’s a big media event, I miss not being in the center of it. But the way I look at it, I got to do that for so long and I’m really privileged to experience life a little differently. I like being able to observe what’s going on, read, watch movies with my partner. I will definitely be very involved with the community for the rest of my life, but not on a 24/7 basis.

I’ve also been able to spend a lot more time with my family. My father passed away in January 2013 and I’ve been able to spend time with my mother. That’s something I could not have done running the store.

Have you been to eat at 10th and Piedmont (where Outwrite was located)?

Oh yeah! I love those guys and I like what they did with the space. We go there pretty often; it’s fun. Everybody seems to want my reaction. But when we closed the doors, we closed the doors.

Outwrite will always be in everyone’s hearts and minds but these guys have done a great job.

The hardest part was when we closed and there wasn’t anything in there. It was upsetting to see the space quiet after all the life that went on in there.

What was that transition like going from being at Outwrite for almost 20 years and then doing this whole new venture?

It was a challenging learning curve. Fortunately, I had a great group of people around me. It’s great to work with Daren, the staff and volunteers are great, the city of Decatur is so helpful and supportive. My first year was successful, and now I just need to make sure I don’t have a sophomore slump.

It’s a different kind of work. I get to learn about so many different subjects that I didn’t know about before. We have a fantastic science track, a great poetry track. We work with authors in religion and spirituality, health and wellness, family education and parenting, sports. Last year we were able to add a civil human rights track with John Lewis as the keynote speaker.

I am really glad that I have a position where I can work with many of the same authors, publishers, and publicists as I did before. I am privileged to still have a role where I can put together great events and help the community.

Have you ever thought about getting back into retail?

Not right now. I did it through most of the time that I was in high school and college, and 18 years at Outwrite. I love it, but I have this great opportunity right now to do something still in the book industry that’s totally different, so I’m really enjoying that part of it. And I’m enjoying having weekends off!

I’m a survivor and I think that’s pretty typical for LGBT people. I’m really glad to have made a successful transition.

Catching Up... is a new series The GA Voice is introducing where we will check in with a member of Atlanta’s LGBT community. Look for it in print and online, and send your requests for who you would like us to catch up with at tips@ thegavoice.com.

30 | GA VOICE

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ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

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Dramatic docs vie for Pink Peach honors Fact outweighs fiction in Atlanta Film Festival’s LGBT selections

By STEVE WARREN If you’re counting the days (about 189) until Out On Film brings a new bonanza of LGBT cinema to town, you can stave off those hunger pangs with an appetizer from the 2014 Atlanta Film Festival, March 28 through April 6, at the Plaza and 7 Stages theaters.

The festival has several subsections catering to the marvelous diversity of Atlanta moviegoers. I’ll bet you can’t taste just one, but of greatest interest to our readers is the Pink Peach competition, devoted to LGBT features.

There are seven this year, six documentaries and one narrative feature. I’m especially looking forward to the latter, “The Foxy Merkins,” because it was directed by Madeleine Olnek, who made the delightful “Codependent Lesbian Space Alien Seeks Same” a few years ago. In her new film Margaret, a newbie lesbian hooker, is mentored by the supposedly straight Jo. The story traces their developing friendship in the course of their sexual adventures.

Because festival categories tend to overlap, “Foxy Merkins” fans looking for more girlgirl action will step outside the Pink Peach and grab tickets for “The Unwanted,” from the Georgia on Our Mind (local filmmakers) section. It’s a Southern gothic take on a lesbian vampire classic, written and directed

by Atlanta’s Bret Wood and starring Hannah Fierman, Christen Orr and William Katt.

DOCUMENTARIES HIGHLIGHT FILM FEST IN 2014

Above, ‘2 Men and a Wedding’ shines a light on the homophobic laws in parts of Africa.. (Publicity photos)

Above left, ‘Queens & Cowboys: A Straight Year on the Gay Rodeo’ is a study of LGBT progress through the filter of 30 years of calf-ropin’ and bronc-bustin’. Above right, ‘The Foxy Merkins’ is about a newbie lesbian hooker and her mentor, the supposedly straight Jo. (Publicity photos)

It’s hard to believe we figure in more realshelters in New York. ity than drama this year, but several aspects “One: A Story of Love and Equality” is of our lives and history are touched on by about a couple of “outside agitators” interferdocumentarians. ing in the politics of the South. Filmmaker “2 Men and a Wedding” shines a light Becca Roth and her girlfriend travel from on the homophobic laws in parts of Africa, New York to North Carolina to document— specifically focusing on two men who dared and try to influence—that state’s vote on an to celebrate their engagement in Malawi anti-marriage equality amendment. in 2009 and were sentenced to 14 years in The title “Queens & Cowboys: A Straight prison.

Year on the Gay Rodeo” should “Bayou Maharajah: The keep vegans and other animal MORE INFO Tragic Genius of James Booker” lovers away from this study Atlanta Film Festival is the somewhat happier story of LGBT progress through the March 28-April 6 of the man Dr. John called “the www.atlantafilmfestival.com filter of 30 years of calf-ropin’ best black, gay, one-eyed junkie and bronc-bustin’. piano genius New Orleans has There’s probably not a ever produced.” single one of the festival’s 54 features that “Exposed” spotlights the edgy ‘new burwon’t appeal to someone in the LGBT comlesque’ as eight women and men peel away munity. Some feature actors we have been more than their clothes to break down barriers or will be crushing on; others deal with topand question what is “normal.” It sounds like ics some of us are obsessed with. Sometimes they do it in a way that provides lots of laughs. the official synopses leave out plot details “Lucky” spans five years in the life of that incorporate us. And who among us can’t Lucky Torres, who has gone from growing appreciate a 100 percent heterosexual story if up in an orphanage to surviving in homeless it’s well told?

Here are a few more titles that sound interesting, for one reason or another: Judging from the poster for “Speak Now,” there must be a lesbian couple among the guests whose secrets come pouring out when a group of high school friends reunite for a wedding.

PLENTY OF STRAIGHT FARE, TOO

The opening night film, “Joe” takes Nicolas Cage back to the days when he wasn’t just making crappy action movies for the money. He plays a tough ex-con who becomes the protector of a troubled teen (Tye Sheridan of “Mud”).

Jesse Eisenberg must have hated Armie Hammer getting all the acting accolades for “The Social Network” for playing twins, so while Armie went on to be “The Lone Ranger,” Jesse took a dual role in an indie called “The Double,” co-starring Mia Wasikowska. It closes the festival six weeks before it opens a commercial run.

“The Congress,” which is partially animated, may be science-fiction or a glimpse

into the future of cinema. Robin Wright plays an actress who agrees to be scanned into computers so her image can be used forever without ever aging. Jon Hamm and Paul Giamatti co-star.

If we didn’t know there are no homosexuals in China we might expect one to pop up in “The Road to Fame,” a documentary about a high school production of “Fame.”

We do know there are homosexuals in Los Angeles, but since the dancers in “Getting to The Nutcracker” range from 3 to 18 years, you’ll probably have to use your gaydar to determine who is and who will be.

A few Pink Peach shorts are scattered through the festival. Of the 11 programs of shorts, “Drama 1” includes “Annalyn,” a halfhour Swedish lesbian drama; “Drama 2” includes “Escaping Gravity,” a German drama about a transgender girl trying to win her father’s love (and “5cm,” about a—presumably straight—male dancer in the National Ballet of China). Other Pink Peach shorts are attached to the features “Speak Now” and “2 Men and a Wedding.”

There’s more information about these and the other films in the 2014 Atlanta Film Festival at www.atlantafilmfestival.com.

It’s worth taking a few minutes to read about them because it will be your only chance to see many of them, at least on a movie screen.

We hope to have reviews of several of these films in the next issue, which comes out on the festival’s opening day; but for now we’ll give the last word to Out On Film’s festival director, Jim Farmer: “Thanks to the Pink Peach series, gay audiences can see LGBT films both in the spring at the Atlanta Film Festival and then again in the fall with Out On Film.”

BEST BETS CALENDAR

Event spotlight

03.14.13-03.27.14

FRIDAY, MARCH 14

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FRIDAY, MARCH 14

Join lots of women at the Fourth Tuesday social hour from 6 – 8 p.m. tonight, Mixx Atlanta, www.mixxatlanta.com

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GA VOICE | 31

bout Tell us aBT event your LG ays to submit your

two w our online There are clusion in in r fo t n e v it your LGBT e dars. Subm ice. n le a c t n ri GAVo and p www.the ditor@ to fo in t n e ev to e ail details com or e-m om. e.c theGAVoic

Decatur Women’s Sports League softball season opens tonight with a ceremony dedicated to the late Chef Ria Pell and with a new Bluebird team named for her restaurant. Host bar after the games tonight is Palookaville in Avondale Estates. Starts at 7:30 p.m., Kelly Cofer Park in Tucker, www.decaturwomensports.com “Stranger By the Lake,” the acclaimed gaythemed drama that was the winner of the Queer Palm and Un Certain Regard Directing Prize at the 2013 Cannes Film Festival, opens at the Midtown Art Cinema, various times, www.landmarktheatres.com

Photo by Angela George

“Elaine Stritch: Shoot Me,” a documentary about the Tony Award winning Broadway legend, opens at the Midtown Art Cinema, various times, www.landmarktheatres.com

SATURDAY, MARCH 15

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Funny man Bill Maher cracks jokes and provides social and political commentary at the Cobb Energy Centre at 8 p.m., www.cobbenergycentre.com

Closing reception for “Steal This Bike” exhibit, a group exhibit looking at visual culture within the digital age. 8-10 p.m., Mint gallery, www.mintatl.org Funny man Aziz Ansari visits the Fox Theatre tonight at 7:30 p.m., www.foxtheatre.org Rising country star Chris Cagle performs at Fuzions Bar and Grill in Monroe, GA., 8 p.m., www.ticketleap.com Edie Cheezburger and a gaggle of special guests present “The Other Show” drag event weekly at Jungle Atlanta, 9:30 p.m., www.jungelatl.com Hotlanta Rubber Gear Club Bar Night w/ DJ Nat, as well as Otter Night with guest DJ at0M1c, 10 p.m., Atlanta Eagle, www.atlantaeagle.com Destiny Brooks and Justice Taylor turn it up for Femme Fatale, 11 p.m., Burkhart’s, www.burkharts.com

FRIDAY-SATURDAY, MARCH 14 -15 SATURDAY, MARCH 15 Grab your green and head to the St. Patty’s Day Party at My Sister’s Room tonight, with the Drag Race Season Five show at 11 p.m. hosted by Tiff-Nay and Romeo Lee, with DJ Liz Owen, www.mysistersroom.com

The Snake Nation Arts Festival is a collaboration between the Castleberry Hill Creative/ Historic District and PushPush Theater, with live music, interactive art, video shoots, dance troupes, artists markets, walking gallery tours, historic tours, movie tours, and the filming of a new series by PushPush, Castleberry Hill, www. facebook.com/events/655539291172189/?notif_ t=plan_user_invited

SATURDAY, MARCH 15

The Atlanta Men’s Roller Derby hosts its first home bout against the the Greenville Atom Bombs. The first bout is the Arsenal of Derby against the Marietta Derby Darlins is at 4 p.m. with the main bout at 6 p.m. Tickets are $12 in advance, $15 at the door. Cobb Civic Center, www.atlantamensrollerderby.com

via www.atlantamensrollerderby.com

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SATURDAY, MARCH 15

Good eats and great socializing mark the Lesbian 50+ Potluck and Social, 6 – 8 p.m., The Rush Center, www.rushcenteratl.org Chelsea Handler’s “Uganda Be Killing Me Live” tour comes to the Fox Theatre, 8 p.m., www.foxtheatre.org Eastern music meets Western instruments at Atlanta Freedom Bands’ “Music of the Far East” concert. 8 – 10 p.m., North Decatur Presbyterian Church, www.ndpc.org

The Haus of Steel event features DJ Shaen Stiel and Grace Towers, 10 p.m. – 3 a.m., Heretic Atlanta, www.hereticatlanta.com It’s the 8th anniversary of LeBuzz as well as its St. Patrick’s Day celebration including a Best Ginger Contest, Best Irish Underwear (men and women), drink specials, stripper pole and more. The night also includes the Divas Cabaret Show. 10 p.m., LeBuzz, www.thenewlebuzz.com

SATURDAY-SUNDAY, MARCH 15 -16

The Goddess Raven joins Ruby’s Redd Light District, with DJ Rob Reum, 9 p.m., Jungle Atlanta, www.jungleatl.com

The Black American Revival events include Mr/Miss Black America, with all day events both days, XS Ultra Lounge, 708 Spring St NW, Atlanta, GA 30308

Atlanta Eagle hosts Rugby Bar Night w/ DJ Pat Scott, 10 – 11 p.m., www.atlantaeagle.com

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CALENDAR

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BEST BETS CONTINUED FROM PAGE 31 SUNDAY, MARCH 16

The Annual Oyster Roast St. Patrick’s Day Pre-Celebration Gay Party includes live music from the Christy Alan Band, a silent auction, an antique auto show as well as plenty of food and beer. Sponsored by Savannah FCN, the oldest LGBT organization in the state. $15 for members, $20 for one-day membership. 11:30 a.m.-4 p.m., Lake Mayer Park in Savannah, www.firstcitynetwork.net Learn to throw a curveball as Hotlanta Softball League presents a new player skills clinic at Metro Softball Complex from noon to 2 p.m., followed by a Beer Bust at Frogs Midtown, www.hotlantasoftball.org Lips Atlanta is the home for Gospel Brunch, with the Sisters of Sequin, hosted by Bubba D. Licious, with a brunch special and $5 show cover, with brunch at 12:30 p.m. and entertainment at 1:30 p.m., www.lipsatl.com PFLAG and Lost-n-Found Youth team up for a meeting to discuss getting LGBT teens off the street, Saint Mark United Methodist Church, 2:30 – 5 p.m., www.stmarkumc.org, www.lostnfoundyouth.org Lateasha Shante Shuntel hosts The Silicone Outlaw with special guests Taejah Thomas, Nichelle Paris, Raquel Lord, Shawnna Brooks and Nicole Paige Brooks, 8 p.m., Blake’s on the Park, www.blakesontheparkatlanta.com The Armorettes perform every Sunday at Burkhart’s, the infamous Camp Drag Queens of the South, 9 p.m., www.burkharts.com

LESLIE A. COOK JD, CFP®, CDFA™ Financial Advisor 825 Juniper St Atlanta, GA 30308 404.564.4265 leslie.a.cook@ampf.com ameripriseadvisors.com/ leslie.a.cook

Can you keep your lifestyle in retirement?

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Xion’s weekly dance party features European DJ Pagano in his ATL debut, 3 a.m., www.xionatlanta.com

MONDAY, MARCH 17

Photo by Dyana Bagby

MONDAY, MARCH 17

The Big Gay Game Show, featuring the Match Game, Family Feud, The Newlywed Game and more, is a monthly benefit for Lost-n-Found Youth, 7 – 10 p.m., Jungle Atlanta, www.jungleatl.com

TUESDAY, MARCH 18

3 Legged Cowboy’s Two Step Tuesday offers free dance lessons from 8 – 9 p.m. and an open dance from 9 – 11 p.m., Heretic Atlanta, www.hereticatlanta.com

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 19

Free Rapid HIV testing is available at Emory, sponsored by DeKalb County Board of Health, SHAG, and the Office of Health Promotion, beginning today from 11 a.m. – 3 p.m., www.emory.edu Stretch it out - MISTER Center presents yoga from 5:30 – 7 p.m., www.mistercenter.org The ins and out of being polyamorous are discussed in the Velvet Lips advanced sexuality series with “I’m Poly And..” Author Elisabeth Sheff, PhD will be featured on the panel and will be signing her latest book “The Polyamorists Next Door.” This is a Charis Circle Urban Sustainability and Wellness Event. The suggested donation is $15. 7:30 – 9 p.m., Charis Books, www.charisbooksandmore.com

Grammy nominee Robin Thicke’s rescheduled appearance at the Fox Theatre is this evening, 7:45 p.m., www.foxtheatre.org

The new “Maple and Vine” opens at Actor’s Express, written by out playwright Jordan Harrison and directed by out lesbian Kate Warner, 8 p.m., www.actorsexpress.com

New Monday Night Trivia, hosted by Wild Cherry Sucret, offers chances to win up to $250 in cash and prizes. 11 p.m., Blake’s, www.blakesontheparkatlanta.com

Hump Night fun is hosted by Regina at Friends on Ponce at 8 p.m., www.friendsonponce.com

Blue Monday Karoke at Burkhart’s, 11:30 p.m., www.burkharts.com

Dragnificence is every Wednesday at 10 p.m. at Jungle, www.jungleatl.com

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CALENDAR

THURSDAY, MARCH 20

The Atlanta Rollergirls host a double feature home bout, at 5 and 7:30 p.m., at Yaarab Shrine Center, 400 Ponce De Leon Ave, Atlanta, GA 30308, www.atlantarollergirls.com

Charis and Cliterati pair up to present an inviting and fierce open mic & reading series. Hosted by the anarchic spoken word team of Karen G and Theresa Davis, members of the Art Amok Slam Team, this series cultivates the voices of authors, novices and an assortment of poets, songstresses and storytellers. March’s featured perfomer is Tamara J. Madison, an internationally traveled author, poet, performer, and instructor. This is a Charis Circle From Margin to Center Literary event. The suggested donation is $5. 7:30 – 9 p.m., Charis Books, www.charisbooksandmore.com

The Atlanta Bucks play a home match at Morehouse. More information available at www. atlantabucksrugby.org

Aces high? Join SAGE Atlanta’s Cards and Social Hour, 10 – 11 a.m., The Rush Center, www.rushcenteratl.org

The Metro Atlanta Association of Professionals hosts a kickoff party sponsored by Teksystems, with more information at www.maapatl.org

FRIDAY, MARCH 21

Get down with the boys in town at the Boys Room Video Dance Party, with videos provided

by DJ Headmaster, Mary’s Atlanta, www.marysatlanta.com The Third Friday Film Series screens the acclaimed “Fruitvale Station,” based on the real life of Oscar Grant, the 22 year old black man shot by BART police, at 7:30 p.m., followed by a discussion after the film, First Existentialist Congregation, www.firstexistentialist.org The Moody Blues’ Timeless Flight Tour stops in Atlanta at 8 p.m., Fox Theatre, www.foxtheatre.org The first annual Mr. GA Continental features appearances by Nicole Luv Dupree, Christopher Iman, Kalil Valentino. The event is a celebration of men, male leads and talent. This pageant is the official preliminary event in the state for the national pageant in Chicago over Labor Day Weekend. Admission is $10 for 21 and up, $15 for 18-20. Starts at 8 p.m., LeBuzz, www.thenewlebuzz.com Drag Otic is a drag extravaganza with Nicole Luv Dupree, Trinity Bonet and many more, 11 p.m., Blake’s, www.blakesontheparkatlanta.com

SATURDAY, MARCH 22

Lift Up Atlanta’s Women’s Empowerment Workshop hosted by Atlanta’s Every Womyn is hosted by speaker and poet Imani Evans, founder of Women Healing Women Inc.; with life coach and motivational speaker Onyx Keesha, founder of M Power Productions; Aloycia Woods; with live entertainment by Monica Raye Simpson. Food, wine and spoken word. Tickets are $12 in advance, $18 at the door.

10 a.m. - 2 p.m., First Metropolitan Community Church, www.eventbrite.com/e/lift-upatlantas-womens-empowerment-workshoptickets-10032865571

Charis Books & More plays home to the Atlanta Word Works 6th Annual Youth Poetry Slam. The preliminary round hosted by Aurielle Lucier and Anwar Johnson. Competition is open to all youths ages 13-19, 6 – 9 p.m., Charis Books, www.charisbooksandmore.com

Congregation Bet Haverim hosts a CD release concert for “Wheels Within Wheels,” the new CD by the CBH Chorus, Band and Strings. Tickets are $30. Doors open at 7:30, concert begins at 8 p.m., Friends School Sanctuary, 862 S. Columbia Drive, Decatur, GA 30030, www.congregationbethaverim.org Local favorite Michelle Malone brings her devoted following to two shows at Eddie’s Attic, 7:00 and 9:30 p.m., www.eddiesattic.com It’s Daddy Night w/ DJ Brett Long, as well as Panther L/L night, from 10 – 11 p.m., Atlanta Eagle, www.atlantaeagle.com

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It’s LGBT Niteout at the Atlanta Ballet’s Modern Choreographic Voices, spotlighting some of today’s contemporary choreographers through March 23. $50 gets you a ticket, an invitation to a pre-show party with DJ John, and a meet-and-greet with a cast member, 7 p.m. with an 8 p.m. curtain, Cobb Energy Centre, www.cobbenergycentre.com Adult film star Tristan Jaxx shows off his DJ skills at Jungle Atlanta, www.jungleatl.com

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COntinued FROM PAGE 33 The Divas Cabaret, starring Destiny Brooks, Heather Daniels, Iysis Dupree, Kitty Love and special guests, is tonight, with DJ Birdman spinning, 11 p.m., LeBuzz, www.thenewlebuzz.com

SUNDAY, MARCH 23

The new basketball drama “The Tall Girls” plays twice today, at 2:30 and 7:30 p.m., at the Alliance’s Hertz Stage, www.alliancetheatre.org

MONDAY, MARCH 24

Bring an empty stomach to Taco, Tequila and Beer Night at Amsterdam Atlanta, with $5 tacos, 6 – 11 p.m., www.amsterdamatlanta.com Woofs Atlanta hosts Trivia beginning at 8 p.m., www.woofsatlanta.com Traxx Atlanta presents Primetime Wednesdays with hip hop all night, $3 martinis and $5 well drinks, Sutra Lounge, 1136 Crescent Avenue, Atlanta, GA 30309

THURSDAY, MARCH 27

It’s Trivia Night at Joe’s on Juniper, beginning at 8 p.m., http://joesonjuniper.com/ Decadence: A Night of Drinking and Debauchery is every Thursday starting at 10 p.m., hosted by Adam Bland and Ashley Mitchell with beats by DJ Daryl Cox. A wet underwear contest begins at 11 p.m, with a cash prize and dancers aplenty, Ten Atlanta, www.tenatlanta.com

Get your voice ready for Blue Monday Karaoke with Darlene Majewski, 10 p.m., Burkhart’s, www.burkharts.com

MARCH 28

DJ Travis spins at the Atlanta Eagle from 10 – 11 p.m., www.atlanteagle.com

THEA

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 26

Writing With Intent is a monthly facilitated group for writers seeking to improve their craft. This month features a special guest teacher, Tamara Madison, with the topic Unleashing the Muse! This is a Charis Circle From Margin to Center Literary event and the suggested donation is $10, 6:30 – 8:30 p.m., Charis Books, www.charisbooksandmore.com

TUESDAY, MARCH 25

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UPCOMING

The Atlanta Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce hosts its monthly Fourth Friday networking/meeting at the Alliance Theatre, with discounted tickets to the company’s “The Tall Girls” available, 5:30 – 7:30 p.m., www.atlantagaychamber.org

THURSDAY-FRIDAY, MARCH 27–28

The Whose Beloved Community? Black Civil and LGBT Rights conference features activist Mandy Carter, civil rights leader Julian Bond and writer Dr. Alexis Pauline Gumbs. Free and open to the public. Registration required.

Glenn Memorial Methodist Church, www.glennumc.org

Photo via alexispauline.com

“Strawberry Fields Forever,” indeed - the national tour of “Beatlemania” at 8 p.m. at the Cobb Energy Centre, www.cobbenergycentre.com Sweet Tea: Girl Powerrrrr! A queer variety show is celebrating Women’s History Month honoring all the “women, ladies and femmebots of the world.” The event is free but suggested donation of $5 gets you two raffle tickets. Hosted by Taylor Alxndr and featuring DJ PK FIRE. 8 p.m., The Hangar, 151 Sampson St., Atlanta, GA 30312.

MARCH 29

DJ Tony Moran returns to Jungle Atlanta, www.jungleatl.com

APRIL 2

“American Idol” winner Kris Allen visits Eddie’s Attic, 8 p.m., www.eddiesattic.com Yo-Yo Ma returns to the Atlanta Symphony, 8 p.m., www.aso.org

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ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

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THEATER byJIM FARMER

’50s Tupperware parties do not a simpler time make Beneath its sunny exterior, the new comedy “Maple and Vine” delves into some deeper issues than one might expect, including an LGBT issue. It opens at Actor’s Express next week.

Jordan Harrison’s production, which premiered at the 2011 Humana Play Festival in Louisville, Kentucky, posits an intriguing “what if” proposition. When a Manhattan couple, Katha (Kate Donadio) and Ryu (Michael Sung-Ho), decide that contemporary society is too fast-paced for them, they opt to relocate to a community of 1950s reenactors. Yet the move doesn’t work out as well as Katha had envisioned. What the couple find is that although the times should be simpler, matters of race, sexuality and gender arise amidst the ever-present Tupperware parties. Although the 1950s may have been slower, views were not progressive and differences weren’t understood.

“The characters think the grass is greener in some other time, but they change in ways they do not expect,” says Kate Warner, the out director helming the play. “It brings out the best and worst in them. The relationships they have evolve.”

Although some gay angles emerge in the comedy, Warner doesn’t want to give away the surprises. Playwright Harrison himself is out and an Actor’s Express vet. The company staged the playwright’s “Finn in the Underworld” as

MORE INFO

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“Maple and Vine” Actor’s Express 887 W. Marietta St. NW, Atlanta, GA 30318 March 19 – April 20 “Elaine Stritch: Shoot Me” Midtown Art Cinema 931 Monroe Drive, Atlanta, GA 30308 Opens March 14 www.landmarktheatres.com

Michael Sung-Ho (Ryu) and Kate Donadio (Katha) in ‘Maple and Vine.’ (Image by BreeAnne Clowdus)

part of its 23rd season.

The director applauds Harrison’s ability to work in an LGBT storyline. “Years ago it used to be brave to have a coming-out play, but these days these stories deal with life in the mainstream,” Warner says.

Warner moved away from the area in 2009 to take a job as the artistic director at the New Repertory Theatre in Boston. She is back home now for good and happy to be here. This gig unites her with many performers she has worked with before, such as John Benzinger, and some new ones as well.

This is her fifth gig at Actor’s Express, follow-

ing “Pulp,” “The Last Five Years,” “Octopus” and “Next Fall,” all but one of which shared an LGBT component. She also briefly served as the company’s interim managing producer last season.

From 2005 to 2009, Warner served as the artistic director of Dad’s Garage.

Her philosophy for working with Actor’s Express is a simple one. “I love working there,” she says. “When Freddie (Ashley, the company’s artistic director) calls, I do it.”

STRITCH DOC OPENS IN ATLANTA

The life of a Broadway goddess is explored in the new documentary “Elaine Stritch: Shoot Me,” opening in Atlanta this week at the Midtown Art Cinema. The Tony and Emmy Award winner, at 89, is still around and as in demand as ever. Director Chiemi Karasawa, making her directorial debut, captures the stage icon near-

ing retirement but realizing just how much at home she feels in front of an audience.

The film doesn’t sugarcoat Stritch. Sometimes she can be ferocious and difficult, directing her own scenes. She talks candidly about her drinking problem, how it has affected her career and how she moves forward with it. She also battles diabetes.

She first appeared on Broadway in the late 1940s and has performed steadily since.

One of her best-known roles was in Stephen Sondheim’s “Company,” where she belted out her famous “Ladies Who Lunch” number. She’s done film and TV as well (The documentary includes a scene from “A Farewell to Arms” with Stritch and Rock Hudson.). A number of LGBT theater folks talk candidly about the performer, including Nathan Lane, George C. Wolfe and Cherry Jones. Tina Fey and Alec Baldwin from “30 Rock,” on which Stritch made several guest appearances, also share stories, as does the late James Gandolfini, who says that if he and Elaine had met three decades ago they might have had an “ill-fated affair.”

The interviews are absorbing, but the real prize is Stritch herself, whether she is telling a story or performing. “Shoot Me” is a short feature (less than 90 minutes) that could easily be longer. Nonetheless, no self-respecting theater fan will want to miss it.

PILOBOLUS Saturday, April 5

8 p.m.

“The best Pilobolus works, with no loss of wonder or pleasure as popular entertainment, are sustained flights of poetry and drama” –The New York Times Now in its 42nd year, the popular dance company delights audiences around the globe with its inventive, athletic, witty and collaborative performance works.

EARL KLUGH Saturday, April 12

8 p.m.

“A guitarist with impeccable technique” –The New York Times Grammy-winning guitar virtuoso Earl Klugh and special guests ignite the stage in this “Night of Guitars” exploring Klugh’s various guitar influences and their styles and techniques through solo, duet, trio and full band performances. Support generously provided by Patrick and Gloria Stansbury sponsored by

ferstcenter.org

Call today for tickets! 404-894-9600

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ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

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FILM by Steve Warren

Gay Frenchmen mix love and death in new film ‘Stranger by the Lake’ shows cruising delights, dangers Some critics have compared Alain Guiraudie’s “Stranger by the Lake” to the works of Alfred Hitchcock. I don’t know about the Hitch but there’s plenty of the rest in evidence, the French being less prudish than Americans.

It’s the beginning of the summer season at a gay cruising spot, a rocky beach between a scenic lake and a wooded area that affords minimal privacy.

On his first visit this year Franck (Pierre Deladonchamps) strikes up a platonic friendship with Henri (Patrick D’Assumçao), a middleaged man who’s unattractive, mostly straight, and says he enjoys the gay beach for the peace and quiet it affords.

To save you running to the dictionary afterward, as I had to do, silurus is a large, predatory catfish found in Asia and Europe. It’s discussed as if it were an almost mythical sea monster some people are afraid of, which becomes ironic when the real killer in the water proves to be human.

Soon Franck has fallen in lust with Michel (Christophe Paou), who is more attractive but—the ‘80s called, they want their mustache

MORE INFO

www.landmarktheatres.com

‘Stranger by the Lake’ Opens Friday, March 14 Landmark Midtown Art Cinemas

A gay cruising spot becomes the site for intrigue and murder in the new French film, ‘Stranger by the Lake.’

(Publicity photo)

back. When Franck finds him in the woods Michel is—er, occupied—but they make eye contact that says they’ll meet again.

Before they do, Franck hangs around until twilight and observes Michel drowning another man in the lake. That would discourage most of us from pursuing a relationship, but not Franck. He comes back the next day, finally hooks up with Michel, and is ready to load the U-Haul faster than the old lesbian stereotype.

Michel, however, wants to confine their relationship to the woods. “I have my life,” he says. “We can have great sex without eating or sleeping together.”

Franck declares his love for the man he knows is a murderer, but the actor’s inexpressive face doesn’t offer much in the way of explanation. Is it true love or just lust on Franck’s part? Is he turned on by the element of danger or simply willing to overlook it? (I could ask myself the same thing about my crush on Freddie Highmore in “Bates Motel.”)

You may think you would make different choices, but pray you never have to find out if you’re right.

It couldn’t have been easy for the writerdirector to find non-porn actors willing to participate in so many intimate scenes, gay or straight, even with body doubles being used for the startling “money shot” that assures you Disney had nothing to do with this movie.

That put more pressure on Guiraudie to spell out in the script what his performers are un-

able to convey silently, but he hasn’t done it.

He’s done a fine job on other aspects, slowly establishing the location and rituals of the cruising area and the touching if not entirely believable friendship that develops between Franck and Henri.

After the body of Michel’s victim is discovered a police detective takes up residence at the lake, questioning the regulars for clues to whether the death was accidental or, if not, who was involved in it.

The relationship between Franck and Michel becomes somewhat strained, with Franck probing more deeply than the inspector to get Michel to confide in him, and the homme fatale trying to find out how much Franck knows.

This naturally leads to some suspense, as Franck’s potentially fatal attraction to Michel leads him into a virtual recreation of the murder scene. There’s probably no possible conclusion that would satisfy all viewers, but Guiraudie has come up with one that’s guaranteed to please no one.

Despite its flaws “Stranger by the Lake” offers much to appreciate in the way of sex and suspense, until the ending ruins it. I mean, the passengers on the Titanic enjoyed most of their cruise too.

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ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

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GA VOICE | 37

BOOKS BY Terri Schlichenmeyer

m ‘Pee-Shy: A Memoir’ recalls an incredible journey it.

als not ops

Gay doctor faces disturbing past to move forward

Sometimes, you wish you had a better memory.

You would never, for instance, forget apsence pointments. You could tell better jokes, win clues more arguments, save more money. You’d remember faces of the people you met and if events that happened when you were too small for it to matter.

Then again, as you’ll see in the new book th spec- “Pee-Shy: A Memoir” by Frank Spinelli, some the things you’ll wish uch you could forget.

When he was just an e, as ichel8-year-old, Frank Spinelli received e ble a toy medical kit as a gift, and des, t’s cided on the spot that he wanted e” to be a doctor sex someday. It was a surprise, thereI oyed fore, years later, when he flunked out of college, his scholarship gone with his dreams.

Taking the advice of a friend, Spinelli began therapy to explore the reasons for his dark life and med-school failure. The answer, as it turned out, was easy…

It started when Spinelli was just 11, overweight, bullied, Frank Spinelli, author of ‘Pee Shy: A Memoir’ (Photo by Chad sports-hating Schroer) and a frustration to his Italian parents, who pushed their son into Scouting.

Spinelli hated Scouting, but he admired the area’s Scoutmaster. He liked Bill, and he knew that Bill liked him. Bill took Spinelli out for ice cream, and to do errands. He invited Spinelli over to his house for what Bill called “boy bonding.” When Spinelli eventually told his parents about this molestation, very little was done and even less was said.

Fast forward: back on track, Spinelli achieved his dream of becoming a doctor.

He opened his own practice in New York and grew his clientele. He seemed like a successful, happy gay man, but old issues still plagued him: sometimes, he couldn’t empty his bladder. Configurations of bathrooms mattered.

Other occupants mattered. Urinals were mostly off-limits. It was a remnant of his abuse, and he’d learned to deal with it.

And then, old memories began to float forward. Small reminders nagged at Spinelli.

He found a book written about Bill, and learned that Bill had adopted a son. That opened a floodgate of images and questions.

So Spinnelli picked up the phone and called the man…

Is your jaw on the floor yet? I know mine was as I followed author Frank Spinelli on his incredible journey in “Pee-Shy.” With steady strength and a rare kind of candor, Spinelli writes of a childhood filled with bullying, embarrassment and curiosity for forbidden (girl’s) things. It’s almost a relief as this formerly-outcast kid lets us see him become a successful adult—and yet, it’s a mixed bag, since we’re then privy to his falling apart,

his self-doubts, and frustrations that his body reacts as it does, now that it’s safe. None of this is easy to read—it’s a squirmy book, for sure— but what makes it worthwhile is the sense of courage and closure that the ending allows.

Be aware that there are some explicit bits to this book, but it’s appropriate and not gratuitous. If you can handle that, though, then “PeeShy: A Memoir” is a book that’ll surely stick in your memory.

38 | GA VOICE

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COLUMNISTS

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MELISSA CARTER

THAT'S WHATS SHE SAID Middle-age milestone You are never too old to accomplish great feats I celebrated my 44th birthday this week. As a woman who has never been self-conscious about her age, I celebrate each birthday with as much enthusiasm as the previous one. However, I believe I am in the minority since as I grow older most of my female friends tend to forget to mention their age, and sometimes don’t even celebrate their birthdays at all.

I’m not sure when I was supposed to erase March 11 from my calendar, but it’s hard to be bitter about reaching middle age when I see the accomplishments women much older than I have made.

Take, for instance, Sister Marion Irvine.

She is an American nun who didn’t start running until she was 47-years-old. She began to run for health reasons, because she was overweight and smoking two packs of cigarettes a day. Achieving the nickname “Flying Nun,” Sister Marion went on to to qualify for the Olympic marathon trials at the age of 54, making her the oldest person to do so. Irvine broke several records in distance running throughout her career, and was inducted into multiple running halls of fame.

One of my favorite television shows growing up was “Little House on the Prairie,” starring Melissa Gilbert as Laura Ingalls. The show was based on the books by Laura Ingalls Wilder, which were also stacked on my shelves. But did you know that Mrs.Wilder didn’t publish those books until she was 64-years-old? It was her daughter that encouraged her to document her life on the farm and her marriage to “Manly” Almanzo. Wilder continued the series until the age of 76.

When you think of a video game champion, the image of a teenage boy comes to mind. But Doris Self made video game history when she gained recognition as the “world’s oldest video game champion” at the age of 58. She spent the next 20 years defending that title, and was even

Melissa Carter is one of the Morning Show hosts on B98.5. In addition, she is a writer for Huffington Post. She is recognized as one of the first out radio personalities in Atlanta and one of only a few in the country. Follow her on Twitter @MelissaCarter

recognized by the Guinness World Records in 2007 as the World’s Oldest Video Game Competitor. Her games of choice were Q*Bert and Donkey Kong.

You (hopefully) read about Golda Meir in your history books, but what you might not have learned is that Ms. Meir was raised in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. She moved to the Middle East with her husband, and at 49-years-old she was named Israel’s ambassador to the Soviet Union.

At 55 she became the Foreign Minister to Israel.

And at 70-years-old she because the first female Prime Minister of Israel.

Anna Mary Robertson Moses had arthritis, and by the age of 76 she could no longer hold embroidery needles. She realized she couldn’t just sit and do nothing, so she tried her hand at painting. Better-known as Grandma Moses, she painted every day and turned out more than 1,000 paintings during the next 25 years. By the time of her death her paintings were in museums in New York, Vienna, and Paris.

Julia Child is heralded as one of the most famous chefs in history. She was spoofed on “Saturday Night Live” and portrayed by Oscarnominee Meryl Streep. But it wasn’t a lifetime of cooking that lead Child to her fame. Child published her first cookbook when she was 49-years-old. Her first television program aired when she was 51. Child’s kitchen, which served as the backdrop for many of her TV shows, is currently on display at the National Museum of American History in Washington, D.C. She even has a rose named after her.

I like celebrating my birthday, and enjoy the idea I was worth being born. And no matter how old you are, when you look through the windshield rather than the rear view mirror, you find there’s a lot of road left to drive. Compared to these ladies, I’m still a baby.

COLUMNISTS

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RYAN LEE

TSOMETIMES 'Y' The masculine mystique Will gays cling to ‘what it means to be a man’?

Ryan Lee is an Atlanta writer.

The intimacy of my relationships with certain straight men has included years of sharing a bed with my childhood best friend, my married co-worker and I referring to each other as “boo,” and my college roommate semi-proposing to me a few months after I came out to him.

We were several bowls into one of the hilarious stoner evenings that made our friendship classic when my roommate—whose entire schtick was being a ball-scratching, dip-spitting jackass—kind of offered to spend eternity with me.

“Dude, I would be cool with this lasting forever,” he said reflectively. “Like, if I could spend every day with you, and we were how we always are, I would be cool with that.”

“I know exactly what you mean,” I said. “I sometimes wish I could marry you as my best friend—contract, vows and all.”

We had coexisted for two years; the second, by request. We cheered for each other, comforted one another and finished the other’s jokes. Despite our frequently opposing worldviews, I don’t recall us ever arguing – although both our zen and my memory can be attributed to marijuana.

Academic suspension and the normal course of young adulthood proved stronger than me and my roommate’s sentiment, but the vulnerability he showed me that night and many others will cuddle my heart till death do I part.

It’s not easy for a straight man to love another man. It is even harder to communicate said love without feeling judged, misunderstood or exploited.

Poor heterosexual men. I know that sounds mocking, but the pity is sincere. Sure, the world is structured for their benefit and enjoyment, but the same thing that grants their privilege— masculinity—stunts their authenticity.

They are prohibited from feeling certain emotions, unable to admit basic realities such as the irrefutable attractiveness of another man.

In some parts of America they cannot smile too much without their manhood becoming suspect, and in all parts of America it would be odd for them to articulate the affection they have for some of the men in their lives.

A friend recently told me about his discomfort with the bromance that he has developed

with a straight male co-worker, and his fear that their bond could be jeopardized by my friend confirming the office rumors that he is gay.

“It sounds like he knows you’re gay and is trying to show you that it doesn’t matter,” I said.

“But if I say that I’m gay, then everybody is going to think that he’s gay, and that’s probably going to cause him to act different toward me,” my friend said.

“It could,” I replied, “but it sounds like you’re more worried about what other people think of him than he is.

“Maybe he wants you to be gay. Maybe he’s waiting for you to give him the chance to prove that he’s not one of these Duck Dynasty bigots, or some meathead who just doesn’t get it. It’s time we let people be who they are, one way or the other, and I think either way we’ll be thankful for the results.”

My optimism about his co-worker—and the larger hope that an era of straight men are eager to assert a new tolerance (even tenderness) for gay people before the door of history hits them on the ass—is tempered by how masculinity remains almighty among gay men. While there seems to be a emerging flexibility in how heterosexual men can express their masculinity—in their relationships with other men, in their attire a la Omar Epps—gender expectations among gay are as rigid as ever.

Whether in our online profiles or in our respectability politics, we glorify a force that has been used to oppress us as much as religion or politics. We reinforce hierarchies of manhood based on our sexual positions or the pitch of our voice, and the less aligned we—and our partners—are with traditional manliness, the more we subtract from our worth.

I have little hope that this pattern will reverse itself, as we pine for an institution that reinforces dominant-submissive dynamics in relationships, without much collective contemplation of whether such an arrangement expands or confines our authentic expression.

As we continue to conquer the forces of homophobia, may we resist the temptation to seize the weapons that were used against us and turn them against our gay brothers.

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