03/01/19, Vol. 9 Issue 27

DON’T TOUCH

LOOK

Supported by

March 22–24, 2019

With the Atlanta Ballet Orchestra

An imaginative mix of three works in March will delight and surprise, revealing the playful side of dance.

Visit atlantaballet.com or call | 1.800.982.2787 for tickets.

Groups of 10+, email groupsales@atlantaballet.com.

Juliana Missano. Photo by Rachel Neville.

FROM THE EDITOR’S DESK

PO Box 77401 • Atlanta, GA 30357 P: 404-815-6941; F: 404-963-6365

EDITORIAL

Editor: Patrick Colson-Price pcolson-price@thegavoice.com Editorial Contributors: Conswella Bennett, Cliff Bostock, Camryn Burke, Melissa Carter, Aidan Ivory Edwards, Jim Farmer, Morgan Fletcher, Luke Gardner, Elizabeth Hazzard, Ryan Lee, Allison Radomski, Jamie Roberts, Dionne Walker, Craig Washington

PRODUCTION

Art Director: Rob Boeger rboeger@thegavoice.com

ONLINE

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BUSINESS

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Social Sabotage Patrick Colson-Price

Downtime can be a curse and a blessing, especially in the age of social media. I sometimes find myself scrolling back months, even years through my social media timelines to see how much I’ve grown physically, emotionally and mentally. There’s a stark contrast that even my blind 18-year-old Chihuahua could see, and because of it, I feel more content with where I’m at in my life in 2019. But still, there’s one part of my past that I wish I could rewrite or even refrain from posting.

I noticed I had a knack for posting any and everything I was thinking or feeling, including the darkest moments of my life. Most of my Facebook posts exposed heartbreak, low selfesteem, financial struggles, work challenges, and everything in-between; these topics were an opportunity to gain some kind of support from the outside when I had little support on the inside. I was feeding my need for happiness, attention, and reassurance through the confines of social affirmation. It clearly wasn’t working. My posts garnered one or two likes, a comment here and there, but ultimately the silence was deafening.

A friend of mine recently posted a very personal and emotional Facebook post regarding his relationship and a mishap that potentially derailed their marital bond. I read it in disbelief, not because of the content of the post, but because he chose to post those intimate details to thousands of Facebook friends. It’s cause for concern because exposing your personal struggles to the world can allow unwanted attention in the form of thirsty, envious men.

Their goal is to cause relationship turmoil between visually unstable married men. I’ve witnessed it first hand. When someone sees your home isn’t secure, what do they do? They try to invade our safest confines and take advantage of the situation. We must defend what we’ve promised is most important to us. It includes handling our personal problems behind closed doors where resolutions can form without the influence of those on the outside.

In many cases, we feel isolated and terrified of being cornered with our own thoughts while having to rely on our conscious to get us through the emotionally challenging times.

I’ve learned over the years to keep my passiveaggressive behavior out of the social media spotlight. Facebook is not the place to air your dirty laundry or your anger towards friends for their wrongdoings. It happened recently to me and seems to continue happening on

a weekly basis. The person posting postpones his frustrations and feelings of dissatisfaction within our friendship. It’s obvious he’s hurt and upset because of his Facebook posts.

The beautiful thing about text messages and phone calls is the chance to hash out differences one-on-one. I’ve always wondered when someone had an issue with something I did or said, why they didn’t come to me directly to resolve the issue at hand. Instead, I scroll through Facebook and stumble upon a passive-aggressive post or meme directed at something I said or did. It’s easy to avoid confrontation by posting behind a phone screen in the comforts of your own bed, but have the decency to address the problem with the person you’ve got beef with.

Maybe it’s because I’ve spent nearly a decade as a reporter where my personal business had to be concealed for the betterment of my career.

Maybe I learned that seeking reassurance from those that didn’t matter only reinforced my need to feel wanted and validated. My advice is simple: learn to manage your personal problems off social media. From intimate relationships to personal friendships, your business is just that: your business. Handle it with respect and care because once it’s out there, it’s in the hands of your harshest critics.

March 1, 2019 Editorial 3

IMPORTANT FACTS FOR BIKTARVY®

This is only a brief summary of important information about BIKTARVY and does not replace talking to your healthcare provider about your condition and your treatment.

MOST IMPORTANT INFORMATION ABOUT BIKTARVY BIKTARVY may cause serious side effects, including: } Worsening of Hepatitis B (HBV) infection. If you have both HIV-1 and HBV, your HBV may suddenly get worse if you stop taking BIKTARVY. Do not stop taking BIKTARVY without first talking to your healthcare provider, as they will need to check your health regularly for several months.

ABOUT BIKTARVY BIKTARVY is a complete, 1-pill, once-a-day prescription medicine used to treat HIV-1 in adults. It can either be used in people who have never taken HIV-1 medicines before, or people who are replacing their current HIV-1 medicines and whose healthcare provider determines they meet certain requirements.

BIKTARVY does not cure HIV-1 or AIDS. HIV-1 is the virus that causes AIDS. Do NOT take BIKTARVY if you also take a medicine that contains: } dofetilide } rifampin } any other medicines to treat HIV-1

BEFORE TAKING BIKTARVY Tell your healthcare provider if you: } Have or have had any kidney or liver problems, including hepatitis infection. } Have any other health problems. } Are pregnant or plan to become pregnant. It is not known if BIKTARVY can harm your unborn baby. Tell your healthcare provider if you become pregnant while taking BIKTARVY. } Are breastfeeding (nursing) or plan to breastfeed. Do not breastfeed. HIV-1 can be passed to the baby in breast milk.

Tell your healthcare provider about all the medicines you take: } Keep a list that includes all prescription and over-the-counter medicines, antacids, laxatives, vitamins, and herbal supplements, and show it to your healthcare provider and pharmacist. } BIKTARVY and other medicines may affect each other. Ask your healthcare provider and pharmacist about medicines that interact with BIKTARVY, and ask if it is safe to take BIKTARVY with all your other medicines.

Get HIV support by downloading a free app at

MyDailyCharge.com

BVYC0103_BIKTARVY_B_10x10-5_GeorgiaVoice_KeepLoving_DR4_r1v1jl.indd All Pages

(bik-TAR-vee)

POSSIBLE SIDE EFFECTS OF BIKTARVY BIKTARVY may cause serious side effects, including: } Those in the “Most Important Information About BIKTARVY” section. } Changes in your immune system. Your immune system may get stronger and begin to fight infections. Tell your healthcare provider if you have any new symptoms after you start taking BIKTARVY. } Kidney problems, including kidney failure. Your healthcare provider should do blood and urine tests to check your kidneys. If you develop new or worse kidney problems, they may tell you to stop taking BIKTARVY. } Too much lactic acid in your blood (lactic acidosis), which is a serious but rare medical emergency that can lead to death. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you get these symptoms: weakness or being more tired than usual, unusual muscle pain, being short of breath or fast breathing, stomach pain with nausea and vomiting, cold or blue hands and feet, feel dizzy or lightheaded, or a fast or abnormal heartbeat. } Severe liver problems, which in rare cases can lead to death.

Tell your healthcare provider right away if you get these symptoms: skin or the white part of your eyes turns yellow, dark “tea-colored” urine, light-colored stools, loss of appetite for several days or longer, nausea, or stomach-area pain. } The most common side effects of BIKTARVY in clinical studies were diarrhea (6%), nausea (6%), and headache (5%).

These are not all the possible side effects of BIKTARVY. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you have any new symptoms while taking BIKTARVY. You are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit www.FDA.gov/medwatch, or call 1-800-FDA-1088.

Your healthcare provider will need to do tests to monitor your health before and during treatment with BIKTARVY. HOW TO TAKE BIKTARVY Take BIKTARVY 1 time each day with or without food.

GET MORE INFORMATION } This is only a brief summary of important information about BIKTARVY. Talk to your healthcare provider or pharmacist to learn more. } Go to BIKTARVY.com or call 1-800-GILEAD-5. } If you need help paying for your medicine, visit BIKTARVY.com for program information.

BIKTARVY, the BIKTARVY Logo, DAILY CHARGE, the DAILY CHARGE Logo, KEEP LOVING, LOVE WHAT’S INSIDE, GILEAD, and the GILEAD Logo are trademarks of Gilead Sciences, Inc., or its related companies.

Version date: December 2018 © 2019 Gilead Sciences, Inc. All rights reserved. BVYC0103 02/19

KEEP LOVING.

Because HIV doesn’t change who you are.

BIKTARVY® is a complete, 1-pill, once-a-day prescription medicine used to treat HIV-1 in certain adults. BIKTARVY does not cure HIV-1 or AIDS.

Ask your healthcare provider if BIKTARVY is right for you. To learn more, visit BIKTARVY.com.

Please see Important Facts about BIKTARVY, including important warnings, on the previous page and visit BIKTARVY.com.

2/20/19 2:54 PM

NEWS

Rainbow House Coalition Opens Home for LGBTQ Youth Patrick Colson-Price Rainbow House Coalition is set to open its first house for at-risk LGBTQ youth across the Atlanta metro, and at the beginning of March, several tenants will have a new home.

“We have proven that LGBTQ youth excel and blossom when they are in a supportive environment of others like themselves,” said Rick Westbrook, executive director and founder of Rainbow House Coalition. “Our homeless numbers increase yearly to the point of epidemic proportions. RHC offers a way to free up space in programs for youths that need more intensive attention.”

The idea came about after Westbrook left Lost N’ Found Youth. His husband demanded he take three months off and figure out what to do next. He soon realized a major hurdle for homeless LGBTQ youth was a lack of affordable housing in the metro. That’s when the Rainbow House Coalition was born.

“Rainbow House Coalition believes that affordable housing is a right and not a privilege,” said Westbrook. “Our city faces an extreme lack of affordable and shelter systems to accommodate the needs of people on the street, especially LGBTQ youth.”

Currently, funding for the new house is solely funded through donations, but it’s not stopping Westbrook from making his dream a reality. He says it’s the community that’s been a driving force in the project.

“Our community and its supporters have always beckoned the call when I ask for help. We have always taken care of our own. I was supported when I came out and left home but these days, youth are standing proud, not like when my generation came out,” said Westbrook. “The problem is being in the Bible Belt, well over half are put out. Our youth are not disposable and our community will make sure that they get the chance they need to become the beautiful souls they are meant to be.”

The house, dedicated to trans brothers 6 News March 1, 2019

RICK WESTBROOK FILE PHOTO

and sisters “at risk” or “transitioning out of homelessness,” will have five bedrooms with private baths, common areas, laundry, and kitchen. Each resident can stay as little or as long as they need depending on their situation and goals for the future. Westbrook says they already have several tenants ready to move in.

“The safety of a bed to sleep on, a roof over my head, and a door that locks behind me is something I haven’t had in almost a year now,” said Avan, a 19-year-old trans man from Augusta, Georgia. “It feels like a luxury to me. It’s comforting to not have to worry how my situation might change if my landlord or housemates discovered the history of my gender identity.”

He began transitioning in high school, but because of social backlash and discrimination, Avan left school and started living on his own.

He faced mental, emotional and physical challenges as part of his journey to live “At one point, I was admitted to an inpatient psychiatric program and was unemployed upon release. After sleeping in abandoned buildings for several months, I decided to hitch a ride to Atlanta,” he said. “I quickly landed a great new job, but still struggled to make ends meet while couchsurfing. I’m now 19 and my life looks completely different. Thanks to the Rainbow House Coalition, I now have a space of my own and can sleep soundly at night.”

Alongside Westbrook, a team of board members will help oversee funding and oversight of those tenants, including Victor Brady and Mark Gibson. The search is still on for three more board members.

For more information on the Rainbow House Coalition and their new housing, visit rainbowhouseatl.org. www.thegeorgiavoice.com

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NEWS

The Impact of a Lie Dionne N. Walker

It was the alleged hate crime that brought 2019 in with a sickening bang. In January, openly gay actor Jussie Smollett described being beaten and called racist and homophobic epithets in an attack that earned rebukes across the country. Then the story came under fire.

On January 29, Smollett told Chicago police he was out walking when he was approached by two men who yelled slurs at him, placed a rope around his neck and doused him with a bleach-like substance before fleeing. The crime against the actor, best known for his role on the Fox series Empire, earned him support from fellow actors and even House Speaker Nancy Pelosi.

But critics soon questioned details of the attack, from its timing to its location. On February 21, police arrested Smollett on charges of falsifying a police report, citing evidence the actor paid friends to stage the attack to promote his career. He was later cut out of the last two episodes of Empire and now could face up to three years in prison.

Police now accuse Smollett of orchestrating

the attack, a twist that’s left many in Atlanta’s black LGBTQ community struggling with whom to believe. They question if police are giving the actor a fair shake while worrying that a conviction could harm black hate crime victims for years to come.

“I don’t believe that this young man understood his responsibility for black men, young black men, and the LGBTQ community. I don’t think he understood all of the weight that was on him,” said Amber Moore, co-chair of Atlanta Black Pride and board member of In the Life Atlanta.

long-standing tensions between police and the black community in questioning whether the official investigation can be believed.

“That they’ve come up with a story they can wrap a bow around should not be surprising,” said David Johns, executive director of the National Black Justice Coalition, an LGBTQ civil rights organization in Washington D.C. Johns said the rush to judgment reflects that black men are still often seen as guilty until proven otherwise.

Moore recently told the Voice she is suspending judgment of whether the actor committed a crime, but thought the charges alone could raise future doubts whenever a black gay person says they were bashed. “We already had a lot of work to do. I think he stopped the flow,” she said. “Now we have to get it back.”

“Something happened, period, full stop,” he said. “We should not stand as judge and jury, we should all be asking what happened.” But for others, what happened is already clear.

Nearly as quickly as social media lit up with support, black LGBTQ blogs and social media figures rebuked Smollett, something Moore said points to a greater problem with the community’s willingness to believe the worst about each other.

Smollett but encouraged people to reflect on their own missteps in finding compassion for the troubled actor.

In the black LGBTQ community, the actor’s stunning change from victim to suspect has touched off debates surrounding who to trust in a society that leaders say too often downplays black men as victims. Some cite

What’s missing is a consideration for the actor’s humanity, said Bahdori Oyanna, a metaphysical minister who works largely with Atlanta’s black LGBTQ community.

Oyanna understood the disappointment in

“We have fallen short at times. There was somebody who said it’s going to be alright,” she said. “That somebody giving you that medicine - we should be able to give that to others when they mess up.”

JUSSIE SMOLLETT PHOTO VIA FACEBOOK

GLAAD Urges Georgia General Assembly to Pass Bills to Fight HIV/AIDS Katie Burkholder GLAAD, the largest LGBTQ media advocacy group in the world, urged the Georgia General Assembly on Wednesday (February 13) to pass three state house bills to increase education on HIV/AIDS and equip Georgians with the tools necessary to fight it. These three bills are House Bill 158, House Bill 133, and House Bill 217.

According to Georgia Equality, HB158 would require Medicaid to follow the Georgia AIDS Drug Assistance Program (ADAP) formulary for HIV medicines.

This would remove delays in accessing medication for those living with HIV. 8 News March 1, 2019

SARAH KATE ELLIS PHOTO VIA FACEBOOK

from rising. HB217 would allow the legal establishment of hypodermic syringe and needle-exchange programs to aid in reducing infection of HIV. According to a statement from GLAAD, the passing of these bills is even more crucial in the current political climate created by the Trump administration and other antiLGBTQ activists. So far, President Trump and his administration have attacked America’s LGBTQ community, both in policy and rhetoric, more than 94 times.

HB133 would require sex education and HIV prevention courses in schools to use medically accurate data, a critical tool to prevent the rates of HIV, as well as STIs,

Back in June, six people resigned from Trump’s HIV/AIDS advisory board because they no longer felt they could “do so effectively within

the confines of an advisory body to a president who simply does not care.”

President and CEO of GLAAD, Sarah Kate Ellis, said in a statement that the passing of these bills by the Georgia General Assembly is “the next step” to preventing the transmission of HIV statewide.

“We only beat HIV and AIDS by educating the public and investing in the resources aimed at treatment and finding a cure,” said Ellis. “This legislation is common sense and would be the next step toward reaching a goal of stopping HIV transmissions, and the Georgia General Assembly should vote ‘yes’ on these bills right away.” www.thegeorgiavoice.com

HEALTH

Vetting Your Doc Patrick Colson-Price

Moving to a new city can be a stressful venture.

As you settle into your home, the tiny tasks at hand can start to pile up including finding healthcare providers to keep you on the road to a healthier life. While it’s easy to do a quick google search for local primary care doctors or dentists, picking the right physician can mean the difference in getting the right care you need and being neglected on health issues that are important to you.

“We want you to form a really good relationship with your provider so that you can tell them your sexual history, personal history, substance use, and sexual behavior you may think people aren’t encouraging of,” said Jewel Sawyer, a physician’s assistant with AbsoluteCare in Atlanta. “This is your safe place.”

For decades, members of the LGBTQ community have faced discrimination inside doctors’ offices. According to statistics from the National LGBTQ Task Force, 56 percent of LGBTQ individuals have confronted discrimination while seeking medical treatment. A recent survey by the National Center for Transgender Equality and the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force found that 19 percent of trans and GNC people have been refused care outright because they were transgender or gender non-conforming.

In larger cities across the United States including Atlanta, inclusion in medical practices is becoming more accepted. How do patients find that perfect primary care doctor that is in tune with their medical needs?

Sawyer says it starts with word of mouth.

“Asking your neighbors, people at your gym, www.thegeorgiavoice.com

wherever you frequent...who do they see?” she said. “How long have you been seeing them?

What do they do that you like or dislike?”

Once the research is done, a patient can now begin vetting a potential doctor before they even stepped foot in an examination room.

Practices like AbsoluteCare welcome patients using gender-neutral terms and even take those terms to patient intake paperwork.

“If you walk in and see things are always gendered, ask if there is paperwork that they can make it less gendered. We like to see sexual orientation, gender identity in two parts. What’s your assigned gender at birth and what do you identify as now?” she said.

Sawyer also says the initial phone call to a medical practice can be very telling. “See how the people on the phone address you.

Do they say ma’am or sir, or do they just say ‘thank you for calling, how can I help you?” she said. “If they ask about your partner, do they refer them as a husband or wife, or do they use gender-neutral terms?”

In terms of care, AbsoluteCare has a provider for almost every patient need with 14 providers operating at their Atlanta practice, but their primary focus has been providing compassionate, quality care to those living with HIV in Atlanta for nearly 20 years.

“We tend to stick to the metro area to give you the center of where you’ll find the most LGBTQ providers,” said Sawyer. At AbsoluteCare and other medical practices in the metro, the focus continues to be creating a place for open conversation and trust among those in the Atlanta LGBTQ community and for those who will soon call Atlanta home.

March 1, 2019 Health 9

FEATURE

Keeping it Real (WITH ATLANTA’S LGBTQ REAL ESTATE MARKET) Patrick Colson-Price Atlanta is the blue heart in the red south, and it’s no surprise that the city is growing in LGBTQ numbers. For first-timers here in the ATL, finding the perfect place to settle down with your family can be stressful, but leave it to one of Atlanta’s most well-known LGBTQ real estate agent to guide you in the right direction for the ultimate living experience in the South!

We caught up with Shannon Hames, a Realtor with Common Ground Real Estate, on just what makes Atlanta the place to settle down for LGBTQ couples across the country, and how she can add that special touch to your home buying experience!

Tell us a little about yourself and how you ended up in real estate?

Before I came out, I was a stay at home mom and helped run our family real estate flipping business. When I came out and divorced my ex-husband, my wonderful gay attorney, Jeff Cleghorn, encouraged me to get an education.

I got degrees in both Marketing and English & Professional Communications. It was natural for me to go back to real estate. But 10 Feature March 1, 2019

this time, I put my education to work and used my marketing and communication skills to benefit my clients. I joined the Common Ground Real Estate team at PalmerHouse Properties because both were gay-owned and had a great reputation for giving back to the LGBTQ community. I finished last year as a Top Producer with the Atlanta Board of Realtors and it feels great to not only be working with other LGBTQ people but being really successful, too.

What do you offer to the Atlanta LGBTQ community as a real estate agent?

People in the Atlanta LGBTQ community have always tried to help each other out. We know what we share in terms of struggles. It’s hard for a Realtor who isn’t gay to understand what it feels like to live around homophobia, transphobia or intolerance. Being a lesbian, I DO know what that feels like. Because I can relate, I work hard to make sure that my clients feel safe, welcomed, and affirmed.

In addition to working with clients, I am also working for the LGBTQ community within real estate. HB 19 is a comprehensive civil rights bill that was just introduced

by Rep. Sandra Scott. It would extend

protections in housing, employment, and public accommodations to include sexual orientation and gender identity. The Georgia Association of Realtors (GAR) was ignoring the bill. Two members of my team and recently attended a meeting at the GAR headquarters where they discussed their legislative priorities.

Our purpose was to get them to support and nurture the bill. I’m happy to say that that ball is now rolling! Making sure that my LGBTQ community has access to fair housing is as important to me as selling a swank Midtown Loft.

community is ripe to meet each other out in the fresh air and sunshine.

What makes Atlanta so unique for the LGBTQ community and potential home buyers?

Atlanta has a lot of cool projects going on.

The film industry has helped bring creatives here and we are seeing some upgrades to the cityscape. My current favorite is the Atlanta Beltline. It is 22 miles of repurposed abandoned railroad tracks that encircle the city. It will eventually connect all of these little neighborhoods. It’s a fantastic green space where people can walk, ride bikes, play, enjoy ever-changing art, and visit shops and restaurants along the trail. It’s bringing unprecedented redevelopment, preserving historic neighborhoods and giving people a healthier place to socialize. The LGBTQ

Atlanta used to have two main gayborhoods: Midtown for the guys and Decatur for the ladies. Now, thanks to the shrinking need for the safety of gayborhoods, the LGBTQ community can spread out and enjoy being part of the diversity of many neighborhoods.

Love family neighborhoods? Let me show you Morningside/Lenox Park. Love counter-culture?

I’ve got homes for you in Little Five Points. Want walkability, brewpubs, and fun greenspace? I’ll take you to Old Fourth Ward. Want a starter home where values are on the rise? I’m going to show you around Grove Park. Industrial loft living? Cabbagetown. Each little area has its own vibe and the LGBTQ community are welcome members of all of them. It’s wonderful that we are no longer confined to our own little spaces.

REAL ESTATE AGENT SHANNON HAMES COURTESY PHOTO

www.thegeorgiavoice.com

FEATURE

Where Have All the Gayborhoods Gone?

Dionne N. Walker

RENT IN THE ATL Not ready to buy a home? Need the freedom of short-term leasing and like the idea of being part of a close-knit community? Across the Atlanta metro, several apartment communities are becoming the go-to housing option for the LGBTQ community. Check out these top LGBTQ-friendly property management companies!

Growing up as a black youth on the city’s south side, Spencer Hayes would’ve never imagined calling one of Atlanta’s most affluent and whitest neighborhoods home.

Yet decades later, the black gay real estate agent and his partner of 21 years live in East Cobb, and they couldn’t be happier.

Hayes’ voice lifts excitedly as he describes his modern-on-the-inside, four-bedroom colonial home. He’s thrilled to be politically active and even finding common ground with his Republican neighbors.

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“The old culture is the metro Atlanta area is dying off,” he told the Voice recently, crediting out-of-state transplants as well as younger families with the shift. “These communities are more open.”

Stories like his are becoming common across the city as gay men and women, once more likely to set down roots in traditional gay enclaves like Midtown, are branching out.

They’re buying bungalows near the airport, snatching split level homes in the West End, and even raising rainbow flags in some of the area’s most traditionally conservative neighborhoods. Realtors say it’s the result of increased in town prices and softening attitudes about who people are willing to call neighborhoods.

While it doesn’t spell the end of all housing discrimination by a long shot, local real estate professionals say it is a positive step.

“We’re mixing amongst other families, and that’s the trend I’m seeing,” said Hayes, who works with Palmer House Properties. “It’s not really about the gayborhood.”

While Decatur and East Atlanta continue to www.thegeorgiavoice.com

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be places where gay families gravitate, Hayes named Lakewood and Hapeville as two emerging hot spots due to price and proximity to the airport. “Lakewood is becoming very interesting to many gay couples,” he said.

“Investors are flipping those bungalows and turning them into affordable properties.”

Gay families are increasingly joining straight ones outside the perimeter in Gwinnett County, according to realtor Tim Hur, with Point Honors and Associates Realtors. He named Duluth and Suwanee as places where families are looking, in part because Midtown is increasingly too expensive. “It’s not because we don’t want to live there,” he said. “It’s because there’s nothing there for us.”

The median list price per square foot in Midtown is $349, versus an average of $229 throughout the rest of the city, according to the online real-estate database Zillow. Rising

prices as traditional gay hubs have become trendy has been blamed for the changing face of gayborhoods across the country from Washington D.C.’s Dupont Circle to Chicago’s Boystown. Here in Atlanta, Philip Rafshoon has experienced it first hand. The so-called “Mayor of Midtown” ran Outwrite Bookstore & Coffeehouse, at 10th and Piedmont Avenue, for 18 years before rising rent forced him to shut his doors in 2012.

But Rafshoon, who now works with Midtown Alliance, said the LGBTQ community has also changed. Back in the day, he said the bars, bookstores, and social spots that made up the gayborhood were where marginalized people could connect and feel comfortable. Rafshoon said the rise of the Internet made it easier to meet people online, erasing some of that social need. Social progress also sped up the demise of the traditional gayborhood, he said.

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“As we gained more rights in the ’80s and ’90s, people felt more comfortable living outside of the neighborhood,” he said, adding that while it may be sad in some aspects, it’s overall a sign of progress. But the gayborhood isn’t totally dead. “There’s still a big LGBTQ presence in Midtown,” he said, offering gay-friendly spots along Juniper Street as examples. “There’s plenty of places for our community to still frequent.”

For real estate agent Hayes, stepping out of the city was a struggle. He worried about acceptance in District 6, once represented by well-known gay rights adversary Rep. Tom Price (R-Ga.). But the couple could get more house for their money there. And they were impressed by how friendly everyone seemed.

“We took a chance,” Hayes said, “and it actually blossomed into a beautiful thing.”

March 1, 2019 Feature 11

FEATURE

Tiny Living in the Atl Katie Burkholder With the newest tiny house trend, minimalism goes to the next level with houses smaller than some of our bedrooms.

It’s easy to think we could never downsize to just a couple hundred square feet, but according to Will Johnston of the MicroLife Institute, this downsize could really upsize the quality of your life.

Johnston is the executive director of the MicroLife Institute, which hosts the program Tiny House Atlanta that he founded and directs. Tiny House Atlanta is “dedicated to educating and helping individuals, groups, and cities embrace the tiny house movement.” Will fell in love with micro-living after backpacking through New Zealand five years ago.

“I eliminated three-fourths of my possessions,” he told the Georgia Voice. “I sold my car and downsized to a 10x10 storage unit. I enjoyed the freedom and the weight that was lifted off my shoulders, so I wanted to know who else was doing this.”

12 Feature March 1, 2019

Thus, Johnston got involved in the tiny house movement. These tiny houses are actually called Accessory Dwelling Units, and in the city of Atlanta, they can be no larger than 750 square feet. And don’t let those HGTV shows fool you; the houses on wheels commonly seen in association with tiny living are actually qualified as recreational vehicles in Georgia.

To many, it can seem daunting to live in such a small space, but to Johnston, it’s liberating.

“I don’t think we need that much space,” he said. “We’re marketed to and told that we do, but happiness is not stuff or space; happiness is experiences and people.”

“A home should not be a burden,” he continued. “So many people believe they need to get in the rat race and buy a home so that it increases value. I firmly believe that we need to get back to homes being an area of respite, an area that helps us in life, and not just be seen as a financial asset.”

To Johnston, the one thing holding many people back from living smaller is a societal

inability to live together. “Honestly, to reduce our carbon footprint, we need to actually learn how to live together,” he said. “We just need to learn how to rent rooms, live with each other, and be neighborly.” However, the minimalist recognizes it’s not for everyone.

“It’s a mindset,” he said. “I think people fall in love with the idea but aren’t able to actually handle downsizing into a smaller space. The drawback is one’s own experience.”

If micro-living isn’t for you, you can still incorporate minimalist practices in your own home, no matter how big. As Johnston said with gusto, “Less is more, people! You need to downsize your possessions to create freedom,” he explained. “I’m not saying give up quality, I’m saying give up quantity. You don’t need that much to be happy.”

But for those who think they could do it, a bounty of benefits await you: “More money, more time, less stress, more adventure,” according to Johnston. Not only are there personal benefits but environmental as well.

Because you’re living in a smaller space, you use far less power to heat, light, and cool

WILL JOHNSTON OF THE MICROLIFE INSTITUTE COURTESY PHOTO

your home and your carbon footprint, or the impact you personally have on carbon emissions, is smaller. There can be some drawbacks, particularly in getting started.

Even though they’re small, tiny houses aren’t as cheap to build as one would think – they can range anywhere from $30,000 to $200,000. Not only that, there aren’t any bank products for building ADUs, “so you either need to have equity in your home or have the cash to pay upfront,” he said.

If you’re interested in learning more about micro-living, Tiny House Atlanta will be hosting its fourth annual Tiny House Festival and Home Tour at Atlantic Station on May 11 and 12 from 10am to 6pm both days.

The festival will include a true-to-life tiny house neighborhood that attendees can tour and more. You can buy tickets at tinyhousefestival. com. You can also learn more about microliving at tinyhouseatlanta.com. www.thegeorgiavoice.com

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FEATURE

Real Estate Red Flags Berlin Sylvestre Murphy’s Law means that no fewer than 300,000,000 things can go wrong with a home you just bought. If you’re observant enough, you can avoid a few of them. Here’s what you need to check before you buy — feel free to call us Bob Villa!

Make sure the roof is in good condition.

Check each room’s ceilings and crawl in the attic (if applicable) for any sign of leakage.

Not only are roofs themselves crazy-expensive to replace, but a busted one lets in the elements, which rots away at your interiors.

As well, a shoddy roof job can mean a shoddy insulation job, meaning all your bought-andpaid-for climate control is literally lost in the breeze. Check for proper gutters, as well.

Coastal property? Coast in with your high beams on looking for water damage and leaks. Speaking of leaks, look under sinks and around washer hookups. You really don’t 14 Feature March 1, 2019

want any symptoms of mold and previous water damage that wasn’t properly repaired.

Be on the lookout for bad yard drainage. You don’t want an impromptu lake hanging around and turning the yard into a mud-bogging track. Check the property for large trees within falling distance of the house. Regardless of how old and pretty they are, they’re a potentially fatal problem that — at their most innocuous — can mean replacing a large chunk of the house they crashed through. Additionally, be aware that tree removal isn’t cheap — especially when they’re so large.

Bring a marble and check for uneven floors.

If it rolls on its own, that could be a sign of foundational damage, which is indicative of many things, improper drainage being a big one.

Pay special attention to the windows, as well. Feel for drafts or temperature anomalies while they’re closed. Open and close them to be sure they’re functional.

Lastly, make sure they lock securely.

Visit the neighborhood at night to check for shady activity. Things can change in a moment and appear … well, you know the saying … like night and day. Another potential interest to you is to head to the nearest grocery store. Those folks will give you a good idea about the neighborhood.

Pull up area rugs to check for floor damage.

Ditto moving furniture and large appliances.

If you’re going to buy it, you have every right to know what’s over/under/behind/beneath every square inch.

If the house has had unpermitted work done, the permitting authority may say it needs to be torn back out. Make sure the inspector is looking for work that’s not done to code, and a permit search should be done to make sure all work was permitted. If the home inspector doesn’t do this, it’s a good idea to go down to the city yourself and ask for the permit history.

If there are any DIY-type additions to the house, make sure the inspector gets in there with a fine-toothed comb. From the floors being held up by cinder blocks to exposed wiring due to amateur jobs, there are tons of rig-jobs that’ll cost you huge in the long run.

Test the heating and central air by placing your hand in front of each vent. Check for how long it took to reach hot and cold, and if the vent blows decently. The same goes for faucets — especially the showers.

Scout out the neighbors! Few things make home a living hell than crappy neighbors.

Beware of real estate agents rushing you through rooms. If it sounds too good to be true, it just might be. If every other house in the neighborhood is out of reach, but your potential new one is modestly priced, you’re going to want that inspector in there like a bloodhound on the trail for reasons why. www.thegeorgiavoice.com

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FEATURE

Aidan Ivory Edwards Neighbors are a strange concept. We live in this spatial bubble with people who are virtually strangers — or if we are fortunate enough (depending on the circumstance), they are people that we know or have familiarity with. Either way, people that you know or may not know still harbor things that are deemed as private. From using a toothbrush to clean dishes, watching Hallmark marathons or having a love for something more promiscuous to the social norm like bondage. We all need privacy. So when neighbors breach that confidentiality, it’s always taken personally.

We all wish that we had the one neighbor that could bring us a chocolate cake (although the film industry has somehow made it fruitcake, which doesn’t taste good) and do the formal meet and greet. Most of the time, your first acquittance with them is them peeking over the wooden fence like Wilson W. Wilson from Home Improvement — except they lack the charm and advice to address with your life’s issues like that brilliant man. In my case, they liked calling the cops on me knowing my father was a police officer himself; sometimes he was even at home when the police arrived.

16 Feature March 1, 2019

When I was a teenager, I wasn’t the best person, but I meant well. And getting the law enforcement involved was highly unnecessary. I posed no threat. Generally, being a police officer’s child can either go two ways — you’re either an exemplary child or you’re the worst kind of kid who reaps the benefits with a pompous attitude.

I fell somewhere in between the two, now that I think about it. I was more on the class clown side of the spectrum. My neighbors, in our quiet suburban neighborhood, assumed that I was a bad child, all day, every day.

I’ll call them Richard, Todd, and lastly Julia — whom I never saw in the five years that I lived there. My friends and I theorized she wasn’t real, but my father assured us that she was — we still don’t believe him.

Todd was the middle-aged son. We assumed he took care of them. They were reticent people besides when they were screaming at each other over prescriptions, rent, bills, and more. These shouting matches were at least once a week, and extremely long, and loud. They never adequately introduced themselves, which I didn’t mind. I caught their names when they had a shouting match outside. I would grab my popcorn and listen from a distance. Late in the evening, I would

ride my bicycle around a small plaza nearby so that I could rid myself of the evening’s teenage angst. There were several nights when I felt like someone was watching me.

I would see an orange glow coming off a cigarette behind their screened in porch. It was Todd, creeping. It was unsettling.

One Saturday in the middle of the summer, I decided to make my friends laugh by taking a shower in our front yard. I had my shampoo and body wash laying on the driveway as I scrub-a-dubbed. It was strange behavior, sure. But I had a bathing suit on and I was a kid minding my own business. Guess who called the cops? Richard, Todd, and Julia.

Police were called on several occasions by the overzealous trio.

The last encounter that I had with Richard, Todd, and Julia, the cops weren’t called. My Father and I were moving to an apartment down the street, and I decided to have a going-away party. The party began after my father left for work. We snuck in some contraband, set-up a beer pong table, and put on some bad music from the late 2000s.

The environment was tame; I was proud of myself despite being duplicitous to my father. I eventually fessed up. Then, there was a pounding at the door.

It was Todd. He was fiery red, wearing a blue dress shirt, khakis, and white tennis shoes. I was slightly buzzed, mostly because I wanted to keep my composure in case something like this would happen. I asked everyone to quiet down before opening the screen door. Todd lost it. It was at that moment that I realized it was mostly his voice that I’d overheard during their screaming matches. He began screaming at me about how terrible of a neighbor I had been, that it was too much to handle for his parents and him. He ended it by calling me a “juvenile delinquent.” I braced to defend myself because he was spitting in my face.

A man in his 40’s losing his temper on a 17-year-old didn’t embarrass me, but I did extract a petty form of revenge. I took advantage of being a cop’s son. So, I told everyone to be loud. I accidentally broke a window. A classmate of mine fell into a pothole in my backyard. Some strangers showed up. But everyone was safe. And they didn’t call the cops, probably after the entire party witnessed Todd threats at the door.

The new me would strongly dislike old me, sure. But I wouldn’t be so bored to watch my every move like Richard, Todd, and Julia.

They called the cops the next day — and to their dismay, I was eating breakfast pizza with my cat. www.thegeorgiavoice.com

FEATURE

I Can’t Believe This Shit!

Berlin Sylvestre

At 30, I became what my 20-year-old self considered a monster: I reported someone to the Homeowner’s Association. (Believe me — I still cringe typing that.) Now before I’m painted as Karen “Let Me Speak To Your Manager” Schultz, let me assure you that I tried everything I knew to avoid that dreaded HOA email and that I have better taste in haircuts than Mrs. Schultz. If you’ve never had to do that, good for you. I, however, got sick of trying to reach the woman whose giant dog took a particular liking to my (expensive-to-me) bahiagrass. If you can imagine the arduous nature of growing and keeping a lawn alongside neighbors who value upkeep, then you’ll know there’s a number of benefits to living where folks watch out for things like incendiary flags and junk cars in the yard. After being ignored by Pink Headphones/Great Dane Woman, I sicced “the law” on her in the form of the www.thegeorgiavoice.com

HOA. I had to! I wasn’t going to put up with her shit anymore. Here’s why.

feeder, is good at providing nutrients to grass because it once was grass. The more you know.

URINE FOR A SURPRISE I’ve heard this one posited by a dog walker before, so I had to look it up. Turns out, he was wrong. Though the grass will brighten in spots a dog has tinkled, this is temporary. The nitrogen in the urine acts, for a quick moment, as a fertilizer of sorts before it quickly imparts what’s known as “urine burn.” It’s essentially the same response the grass will have if you over-fertilize.

Glorious one moment, brown the next. If the pee isn’t washed away by rain or sprinklers in short order, you’re looking at a dead spot.

HAVE WORMS, WILL TRAVEL Parasites are another gnarly side-effect from letting waste sit around. Parvo, trichinosis, whipworms, hookworms, roundworms, giardia, coccidia, and other ickies are transmitted through contact with waste, so unless your dog is thoroughly washing his feet before he comes inside, he and all other pets are at risk of contracting these nasty bugs. In cities, the parasite problem is made worse by rats and other rodents. Dog waste is a huge food source for the critters, and their waste has been linked to a number of diseases that can easily be passed to humans, like leptospirosis, typhus, and salmonellosis.

FERTILE-LIES Another popular misconception is that all poop is good fertilizer. On the contrary, dog poop is pretty shitty at giving your lawn a boost. That’s because dog waste is highly acidic since their diets revolve around lots of protein. Cow manure, the most commonly recognized form of vegetation

HOW YOU GONNA RUNOFF LIKE THAT? In other disgusting news, our water supply is affected by fecal matter left to break down

in yards and alleys. The thing is, dog poop doesn’t break down nicely; it leaves two types of waste that harm our waterways — nutrients and pathogens. The nutrients in their waste feed algae and weeds, making the water murky, smelly, and unusable for fishing and swimming. Ditto the pathogens that flourish in water and render it a hazard.

In fact, the Environmental Protection Agency estimates that just 2–3 days’ worth of waste from 100 dogs can contribute enough bacteria to temporarily shut down a bay and other watershed areas to swimming or shellfishing within 20 miles.

So apart from washing the grass, there’s not much you can do if you’re dealt the crappy hand of negligent neighbors. Though most folks go the preventative route by doing the right thing, approximately 40 percent of dogowning Americans polled by PetHealth.com admit they don’t clean up after their pet. We can do better than that! Pick that shit up!

March 1, 2019 Feature 17

FEATURE

Fix-”her” Upper Patrick Colson-Price Kris Zimmermann and Amber Bradshaw have a unique take on living life together and it’s evident when you walk into their East Village two-story home. From the outside, Zimmermann admits it’s a fixer-upper, but on the inside, there’s a loving history the two have created with every renovation and DIY project.

“It’s charming and wonderful,” Zimmermann says. “I think it’s a really pretty face without makeup on it.” She bought the home more than a decade ago; it was her first home purchase. Six years after buying, she mewt Bradshaw. The two each had their own home, with their own taste in living life on their own.

“We were in the first few months of our relationship and all of the sudden, Amber says, “I bought a house” and I felt like the pressure was off because we didn’t have to talk about something we weren’t ready to do,” she said.

Kris is referring to the two of them moving in together. They admit they took their time, and for good reasons. Each had a dog at the time and the pups didn’t quite get along with one another. It took them almost a year to get acclimated. Once that hurdle was cleared, 18 Feature March 1, 2019

AMBER BRADSHAW AND KRIS ZIMMERMANN COURTESY PHOTOS

they began discussions about growth together in their relationship and in their future home together. “We lived on our own for quite a bit, so we weren’t in a rush to move in with somebody else,” said Bradshaw. Two years ago, she moved in with Zimmermann but with one caveat.

“One thing that was a deal breaker for Amber was my bathroom connecting the master bedroom and the office was falling apart. It was on the list of things that I wanted to do and I knew how much it was going to cost.

I had saved money for years but just hadn’t pulled the trigger,” said Zimmermann. “She says, ‘I’m not moving into this house, that toilet could possibly fall into the floor.’”

She considers the house a fixer-upper.

There’s a lot of work that’s gone into it.

Walls have been torn down, foundation has been reinforced and renovations have made.

Many things that have been really expensive but not as glamorous.

“The good money that I would’ve loved to have put into shrubs and flowers, and landscaping went into building a laundry room and running a set of stairs,” she said.

“The stuff, the underpinnings of the house

that you don’t want to have falling apart.”

Like the world-wide phenomenon Marie Kondo and her “Sparking Joy” moments, the two women feel there’s much joy that comes from the interior of their home. It’s very organized and simplistic. The outside though, a different narrative with areas of the yard in growing turmoil. They’ve tackled the tough tasks of incorporating Bradshaw’s taste in home living with Zimmermann’s previously independent home layout and now it’s on to the outside.

“It just needs a little something. I think there’s some wood that needs to be replaced on porches, landscaping, a new walkway,” said Bradshaw.

The two have taken in a lot of lessons during this transition into couples’ living.

But they remember the wise words of friends and family during moments they may feel their fixer-upper isn’t quite being fixed in due time.

“One of the things my dad taught me was there are certain things that absolutely need to be done for your safety and comfort. If you have a limited amount of money, do the things that are important,” she said. “The other things will come. It might take a lot of time. They will come in time. A house is not a couple of year investment. For me, it was home so it was a long-term investment. This is home for us now.” www.thegeorgiavoice.com

FEATURE

LOST-N-FOUND

COURTESY PHOTO

Homeless Youth Need Homes Too Luke Gardner “It can happen to anyone — never second guess your privileges,” said 20-year-old acting student Ian Woodard regarding the epidemic of homelessness. Woodard is currently in programs at Lost n’ Found, an Atlanta-based organization dedicated to helping LGBTQ youth experiencing homelessness.

After hearing about Lost n’ Found services through word-of-mouth, Woodard started visiting the facility daily, making friends with occupants and staff alike. Nine months later, Woodard’s life has changed for the better, something he attributes to the services of Lost n’ Found.

Lost n’ Found offers LGBTQ youth a place to stay off the streets for 12 hours at its day shelter, complete with three meals, showers, laundry, and entertainment. It also provides case management services and even provides 24/7 housing to dozens of youth.

“What we know from the most recent study 20 Feature March 1, 2019

four years ago, is that there are an estimated 3500 homeless youth on the street and a third of them is LGBTQ,” said Nasheedah Bynes-Muhammad, director of operations and Lost n’ Found. “While we exist to serve homeless LGBTQ kids, we see a good number of those other 3500 who don’t identify as LGBTQ.” Lost n’ Found is the only LGBTQ homelessness organization in Georgia and is one of the only shelters that don’t house people based on a binary system of gender. This means it is the only local shelter where homeless transgender people will be gendered correctly. Ernest Walker, Director of Programs at the facility, explained that it’s important to never turn anyone away. Hee says even when someone older than 26 comes in needing help, they’re brought in and fed before being moved to a facility that can house them.

“With the rampant speed of inequitable development in this city and an eviction crisis that sees 500 evictions filed a week in Fulton County alone, you should understand

that becoming homeless could happen quickly and suddenly to anyone, especially in a city with the worst income inequality in the country,” said Richard Hunsinger, an organizer with the Housing Justice League.

The Housing Justice League is a group of organizers that work to fight displacement, gentrification and unjust housing conditions using tactics like political education and leadership development, direct action, tenant organizing, and anti-gentrification campaigns.

Brandon Harper, a 23-year-old seeing aid, has also found help in Lost n’ Found. He’s been with Lost n’ Found for about three weeks. “I was in a hotel room for a month by myself,” Harper said.

“I couldn’t keep paying, so I Googled ‘shelter for gay people.’” That search led Harper to Lost n’ Found, where private housing was found for him in just a couple of weeks.

Harper moved from Augusta, Georgia in 2015, and has been hard at work making a life for himself as a queer person in the Atlanta metro. Happy to be somewhere

where there is a bigger gay scene, Harper said his goal is to make it big on TV. Woodard also hopes to make it on the screen and has used the support he receives from Lost n’ Found to launch his own acting career, noting he wouldn’t have been able to pursue his passion without a roof over his head.

Despite the success of people like Harper and Woodard, and the work of groups like Lost n’ Found and the Housing Justice League are doing, homelessness can still be found everywhere in Atlanta and throughout Georgia. It signifies the amount of work that must be done in the fight for access to equal housing.

“As we undergo this work of deep organizing to build real, sustainable political power led by the people at home, it is important to also note for housing to be won as a human right, we must also change the culture of our society. This is achieved through the building of this political power and the exercise of it,” said Hunsinger. www.thegeorgiavoice.com

FEATURE

Housewarming Gifts on a Budget Camryn Burke Moving into a new home can be both an exciting and nerve-wracking experience.

It’s hard to let go of what’s familiar and hop into something new. It’s even harder having to move all your furniture from one place to the next. Whether you’re the friend helping unpack boxes or the one that simply shows up to the postmoving party, it’s important to support your friend in this stressful process.

That’s why it’s important to reward your moving-friend with a nice gift to make their new place feel like home. It can be hard to find the right housewarming gift, and especially hard to find the right, inexpensive housewarming gift. Here are a few, simple gifts that could help to upgrade your friend’s place from a house to home while keeping you from breaking the bank.

FLAGS Welcome your LGBTQ neighbors to the neighborhood with a splash of rainbow.

Brushstrokes offers a wide variety of flags perfect for your neighbor’s front porch including Bear Pride, Leather Pride, Bisexual, Human Rights Campaign, and more. The novelty store also offers different home items to give your neighbors a unique take on LGBTQ-oriented decor.

for all the details on big screen actresses.

More here: www.charisbooksandmore.com COFFEE MUGS It’s a popular gift for a reason! Even if you don’t drink coffee, a new mug is still a great and inexpensive gift, and there’s a great selection at The Merchant Atlanta, a local shop that can be found only in the Georgia capital. If you know your friend is a hipster that enjoys a good cup of coffee, tea, or just drinking, then a mug is a perfect gift and Merchant Atlanta is the perfect place to get it.

More here: www.brushstrokesatlanta.com

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TABLE READS Coffee table books should capture your guests attention instantly, so grab a unique read for your new neighbor at Charis Books and More. From gay and lesbian erotica to LGBTQ non-fiction, and New York Times Best Sellers, there’s a book for every room in your neighbors home. For gay couples, Tom of Finland is always a popular pick along with any type of male erotic picture books. For lesbian couples, grab the Lesbian Film Guide

CUSTOM COASTERS No one really thinks about coasters until they’ve moved into an apartment or house of their own. Seeing those rings a cup leaves behind on the table can be a pet peeve, and it can be especially frustrating when it stains.

Buy your friend some coasters fabulous gay coasters with rainbow flags or their favorites iconic celebrity on them! You can find them in a variety of stores, and there are some cute ones to be found in the local pop-up

22 Feature March 1, 2019

shop Crafted Westside, which sells coasters custom to Atlanta and the city’s culture.

More here: www.craftedwestside.com/index#/ custom-coasters CANDLES A common gift, but like mugs, it’s a popular gift for a reason. It’s always nice to light a candle in a new house and let the scent fill the halls. It’s a simple gift that can really change a place’s atmosphere. There’s a great variety of candle scent options, and they’re not expensive so you can buy more than one if your friend is a candle lover. Plus, if you can find a scent that you know they like, the gift seems even more touching and thoughtful.

More here: www.craftedwestside.com/index#/ kinfolk-of-mine SIGNS/PAINTINGS You don’t have to go to an art gallery to find a cute picture for your friend to put up on their wall.

You can simply go to a local boutique, like Paris on Ponce, and find cute signs or paintings for your friend to hang up on their wall. Whether it’s art or a quirky quote, a painting or sign to place in the house can make all the difference in a house’s tone. They can be used to illustrate a little bit of your friend’s personality or remind them of their old place. Regardless, it’s a great gift to share and helps contribute to the new home decor.

More here: parisonponce.com www.thegeorgiavoice.com

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ACTING OUT

SCAD’s aTVfest Honors the Golden Era of Television Jim Farmer Gay and gay-friendly fare has always been a part of SCAD’s aTVfest – and this year was no exception. The event in its seventh year, highlighting current up and coming television programming, brought in a cavalcade of big names.

Chief among those were Carson Kressley and Thom Filicia of “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” fame. They were part of a panel on reality/transformation shows and also screened an episode of their new series, “Get a Room.” The two are aware of the barriers they broke with the original show. “The legacy of ‘Queer Eye’ – whether it’s the old one or the new one – is it’s five gay men going into people’s homes with very good intentions and helping them live a better life,” says Kressley.

Filica concurs. “We are proud of the legacy, and it’s nice to be part of a brand that is still doing well,” he said. Back when the original aired, few LGBT people were on TV. The presence of the fab five really helped acceptance. “When you are on TV, it’s an intimate medium, says Kressley. “You are in people’s living room and bedrooms and they welcome you into their home.” Beyond improving people’s taste levels, the show helped countless people come out after seeing the unapologetically gay cast, says Kressley.

He and Filicia were eager to reunite for “Get a Room,” debuting March 6 on Bravo. ”It’s a show that is about entry level design, with us having fun,” says Filicia. “It demystifies things. You get a sense of the process, and how we do things.”

Also present for aTVfest was Chris Kelly, the first openly gay man to be the head writer for “Saturday Night Live.” His new Comedy Central series “The Other Two” – which he cowrote, co-produced and directed a few episodes of - is about a brother (a gay man) and a sister, finding their place in life when their younger brother achieves Internet fame. “The main

Clockwise from top left: Spotlight Award Honoree Ellie Kemper and SCAD President and Founder Paula Wallace at SCAD aTVfest. Jorma Taccone, Karan Soni, Sasha Compère, and Jon Bass attend SCAD aTVfest with the cast of “Miracle Workers.” Andrea Savage and Joey Slamon attend SCAD aTVfest with the cast of “I’m Sorry.” Leona Lewis attends SCAD aTVfest with the cast of “The Oath.”

character is an actor piecing together roles, serving as a waiter, and pathetically in love with his straight roommate,” says Kelly. “He is a bit self-hating, uncomfortable in his own skin. Out but not in a healthy relationship.”

Molly Shannon is one of the co-stars of the series, and she and Kelly worked together on the acclaimed film “Other People,” which won the actress an Independent Spirit Award and was based on his own mother’s bout with cancer. “When I met her she floored me – she was so incredible to work with. She is funny and can do big and broad but you can also see the humanity in her. “The Other Two” has just received a second-season pick-up.

Finally, the two actors who played gay in “American Gods” – Omid Abtahi and Mousa Kraish - were in attendance. In the first season, the two shared what was perhaps the most graphic gay sex scene ever seen on TV and are excited to be in the new season on a network that pushes the envelope.

“Starz is great,” says Abtahi. “They have two middle-Eastern characters who are not gay terrorists in a positive light. They went beyond what any other network has done.

Even beyond our storyline, they deal with issues like immigration and slavery.” The showrunner of the acclaimed series is gay Bryan Fuller.

24 Columnists March 1, 2019 www.thegeorgiavoice.com

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EATING MY WORDS

Baguettes on a Budget Cliff Bostock You’ve probably noticed that Atlanta is in the grips of an explosion of French restaurants.

I’m not altogether sure why this is, but I’m guessing it has to do with the city’s everlouder, chest-pounding prosperity. Americans, after all, can hardly bring themselves to say “French” without using the adjectives “fancy” and “expensive.” Dammit, we deserve our authentic Sara Lee French Cheesecake!

The newer spots are indeed expensive and for the most part excellent. I’m thinking about Tiny Lou’s, the Brasserie at Bazati, and AIX. The four-year-old Le Bilboquet began this opulent trend. It is ensconced in the Shops at Buckhead, perhaps the whitest commercial development in the city (although the last time I visited, there were actual people of color in staff positions). If you’re not up for these places, I urge you to visit two of my favorite French-inspired café-bistros: Bread & Butterfly and Petit Chou. Prices are low for the most part, the ambiance is charming, service is excellent, and the food is locally sourced and mainly good.

I say “mainly good” because Petit Chou (which means “little cabbage,” befitting its location in Cabbagetown) is maddeningly uneven.

I wrote a few paragraphs about it a year ago and noted that two dishes I sampled were inexplicably devoid of moisture. Recently, I sought refuge from a torrential thunderstorm, to have lunch and a perfect cortado there. I

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ordered the roast beef sandwich, described this way: “toasted baguette, grilled roast beef and melted cheddar, arugula, caramelized shallots, and garlic aioli.” When the sandwich arrived, I was astounded by its size. I picked it up. It literally slid out of my hands, because the bottom half of the baguette was squishywet. It was delicious, but I had to alternate fingers and a fork to eat it. I’ll blame the rain.

The restaurant is also open for breakfast and I have two absurd favorites. Get the Belgian waffles or the crème Brulee French toast.

Both involve a lot of whipped cream, fresh fruit, pearl sugar, nuts, and maple syrup. Petit Chou is now serving dinner and cocktails 6-10pm Thursdays and Fridays. Entrees include classics like beef bourguignon and chicken tarragon. I haven’t tried it yet.

Bread and Butterfly draws its name from an insect with bread-and-butter wings in Lewis Carroll’s “Through the Looking Glass.” I wrote about it three years ago but have only been back a few times, because traffic and parking handily suppress my appetite. Mercifully, there is an overpriced parking garage next to the restaurant, but it can fill up at night.

Bread & Butterfly is owned by Billy Allin, one of our city’s preeminent chefs. He operated the incomparable Cakes & Ale for 10 years and also owns Proof Bakeshop, whose pastries are available at B&B. That means you can eat the city’s best almond croissant here at any time of the day. What has always distinguished

BREAD & BUTTERFLY

PHOTOS BY CLIFF BOSTOCK

ROAST BEEF SANDWICH @ PETIT CHOU

PROSCUITTO AND CORNICHONS @ BREAD & BUTTERFLY

Allin’s food is the clarity of flavors. Part of this is simply the quality of the ingredients. Thus, during a recent lunch, I ordered simply a plate of explosively flavorful yet mouth-melting prosciutto with cornichons. I admit there was a problem. The menu said it came with a baguette, so I was surprised when it was simply 6 tiny, toasted slices. It also promised butter that didn’t arrive. Do not fail to ask for it. You won’t believe the flavor.

Also at my table were a perfectly crafted Croque Monsieur and the famously lusciously rich burger. Other lunchtime dishes include shrimp remoulade, quiche, and a meatless French dip. At 2:30 p.m., the menu converts to snacks. Dinner service begins and 5:30 p.m. Last time I was there, I ordered roasted radicchio with rosemary ham and an egg.

Please, just try it or the roasted chicken served with root vegetables, frisee, pickled raisins, cashew cream, and harissa. Bread & Butterfly

CROQUE MONSIEUR @ BREAD & BUTTERFLY

serves breakfast 7:30-11:30 Monday through Friday. The go-to dish is the day’s omelette or the scrambled eggs with smoked trout, crème Fraiche, and brioche. Here’s the deal: Any meal here is going to be as good as you’ll find at the expensive new places and cost considerably less. You’re welcome.

Cliff Bostock is a former psychotherapist now specializing in life coaching. Contact him at 404-518-4415 or CliffBostock@gmail.com.

MORE INFO Petit Chou 662 Memorial Drive 470-270-8996 PetitChouAtl.com Bread & Butterfly 290 Elizabeth Street 678-515-4536 Bread-and-Butterfly.com

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BEST BETS Our Guide to the Best LGBTQ Events in Atlanta for March 1-14 FRIDAY, MARCH 1

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 6

Get into the best house music in the Southeast with DJ Ron Pullman every first Friday of the month. No cover!

10pm – 3am Atlanta Eagle

THURSDAY, MARCH 7

Vikki Powell and Mateo Segade present the dance party “Daddy Issues” tonight.

10pm – 3am Heretic Atlanta

Don’t miss Ruby Redd’s Birdcage Bingo tonight, joined by some drag royalty.

8:30pm The Hideaway Atlanta

Out director Kent Gash has returned to the Alliance Theatre, where he formerly worked, to helm the new drama “Goodnight, Tyler” tonight.

8pm, through March 10

SATURDAY, MARCH 2

Atlanta Prime Timers meets today.

3pm Phillip Rush Center Annex Join DJ Rob Moore and the Hotlanta Rubber & Gear club for a party that only the Atlanta Eagle can bring. No cover!

10pm – 3am The Atlanta Opera takes a look at the arrogance of youth and the roads not taken in its upcoming production of Tchaikovsky’s masterwork “Eugene Onegin.”

Internationally recognized tenor William Burden leads a sterling cast, including baritone David Adam Moore and soprano Raquel Gonzalez. Performances will be March 2, 5, 8 and 10th.

Tonight, 8pm Cobb Energy Performing Arts Centre Up for a road trip? The Chapel Bar and Nightclub in Birmingham welcomes Abhora from Dragula Season 2, plus a cast of misfits.

11pm – 2am

SUNDAY, MARCH 3

Keep the party going after the ManShaft party with some early morning dancing at Xion. DJ Dee Martello aka Twisted Dee will spin the beats as the sun rises over Atlanta.

3am – 7am BJ Roosters In recognition of Black History Month and its 2019 theme Black Migrations, the Auburn Avenue Research Library will host the photographic exhibition Homecoming: The Windows and Mirrors of Black Portraiture, featuring selected images from AARL’s archival collection. This exhibit is a visualized metaphorical extension of the term migration that emphasizes the use

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EVENT SPOTLIGHT SATURDAY, MARCH 2

The ManShaft: Lumberjack Edition is a time to come warm up with your fellow “woods” men. Gear up and pull out your flannels, union suits, skull caps, & tight jeans. Expect a hot log jam full of furry chests & faces, hot daddies, bears & their cubs, and you. DJ Eric, DJ Diablo Rico and DJ Mike Pope will spin the hottest beats all night long.

10pm – 3am Heretic Atlanta of portrait photography of and by Black people to construct and inhabit new social realities.

Running through May 19

MONDAY, MARCH 4

Join the Georgia HIV Justice Coalition’s monthly community meeting to discuss efforts to modernize HIV criminal law in Georgia. Drawing on the support of both state and local community partners and national HIV advocacy organizations, advocates from the public health, medical, legal, and policy community came together in 2013 to initiate a campaign to decriminalize HIV in Georgia. Beginning as a Working Group, this group of advocates expanded to the broader-based Georgia Coalition

to End HIV Criminalization in 2016. The Coalition is affiliated with the Positive Justice Program, a national network of organizations and individuals working to end HIV criminalization in various states.

In 2018, the Coalition rebranded to the Georgia HIV Justice Coalition.

6:30 – 8pm Phillip Rush Center The PFLAG support group for parents and families of LGBTQ children meets tonight.

7:30 – 9pm Atlanta International School

TUESDAY, MARCH 5

Be brave – it’s Underwear Night at the Atlanta Eagle.

7pm – 3am

Held the first Thursday of the month with host Alex Suarez, FEMME is dedicated to providing a safe space in Athens for queer folks, allies, and a range of entertainers to come to together under one roof for an amazing night of performance, drag, and one big ass dance party. This month features Edna Allan Hoe from the Haus of Gunt, Lazanya Ontre from the Haus of Gunt, Cola Fizz from the Kourtesans, Edie Bellini from Atlanta, DOT the queen and beats by DJ Quincy.

9pm – 2am Sister Louisa’s Church

FRIDAY, MARCH 8

Out artist Sonia Leigh plays tonight at Eddie’s Attic.

9pm Come enjoy Queer Bait, featuring videos with DJ Headmaster, at Mary’s tonight.

DILF is back in the ATL as Joe Whitaker presents “Strapped” at the Heretic Atlanta. Harness, Jocks, underwear highly encouraged. DJ Xavier Alvarado travels all the way from Mexico City to bring you the hottest beats. Pre-sale tickets $10. Tickets also for sale at door.

10pm – 3am

SATURDAY, MARCH 9

Atlanta Freedom Bands’ first concert of the year, Dance the Night Away!, promises a heart-pumping, toe-tapping tour of the sounds and rhythms of dance.

The program spans a wide range from folk dances and ballet to swing and the Latin flavors of mambo, tango, and cumbia. The music features an expanded percussion section that is sure to keep the tempo driving

CONTINUES ON PAGE 29 www.thegeorgiavoice.com

BEST BETS is the window through which the film subtly addresses inequality in the rural south during the Jim Crow era.

7 – 9pm Hill Auditorium of the High Museum of Art

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 28 all through the show. These infectious rhythms will also give you a taste of several different cultures from around the world as we travel from Russian villages to the streets of Cuba and the salons of Buenos Aires.

8 – 9:30pm Druid Hills Presbyterian Church More to Love presents … WISH! An immersive experience where all of your senses will be taken on a journey. Stroll the Bazaar Market with local vendors, partake in some “love potion”, join in a hookah session with friends, and watch performers and entertainers of all varieties. Shake your hips to the beats of DJ Chris Gris all under a Moroccan tent. All proceeds go to More to Love’s volunteer trip to help the Hill Tribes of Northern Thailand.

Ticket entry to this event also gets you into the Heretic Atlanta all night long. Pre-sale tickets are $15. Tickets are $20 at the door.

4pm – 10pm Keep the party going with the More to Love after party with beats by DJ Roland Belmares.

10pm – 3am Heretic Atlanta

SUNDAY, MARCH 10

EVENT SPOTLIGHT MORE TO LOVE PRESENTS… WISH!

Get ready for your senses to be immersed in the sights, sounds, and scents of middle eastern ambiance as More to Love presents … Wish! In its third year, the organization is focused on giving back to communities around the world.

“This year, More To Love is taking a group of volunteers over to Northern Thailand to help do humanitarian work for the Hill Tribes.

We will be teaming up with The Mirror Foundation which is a local, established team,” says Chad Wick (left), found of More to Love.

“All money raised will go towards this mission which will include airfare, program fees, etc. Additional funds raised will go towards bedding and malaria nets for the community. Our desire is to take this love that has been kindled here and help set it ablaze not only locally but globally.”

Xion is back with another world-renowned DJ to keep you dancing into Sunday.

DJ Oscar Velazquez will take you higher with beats all morning long.

3am – 7am BJ Roosters

From hookah sessions to exotic dancers and performers underneath a Moroccan tent, the event held at Heretic Atlanta will take you on an unforgettable journey. “Heretic has not only been a supporter of MTL from the beginning but has truly gotten behind our mission this year,” said Wick. “There is a team that helps put these events on- their ideas, their contributions, their sacrifices. I feel honored to be a part of it all. I also feel like we are tapping into an energy that is already there within us all, within our community.”

My Sister’s Room is the home for Queer AF and Crazy AF, with guests Angel Fazce, Jackson Rimsday, D’Knighten Day and Candida Valentina, hosted by the Queerly Beloved Revue.

9pm

The party goes from 4 - 10pm with tickets available online and at the door. DJ Chris Gris (right) will take you higher behind the DJ booth all night long. Entry into this party gets you into the Heretic Atlanta all Saturday night!

MONDAY, MARCH 11

T-Time Atlanta Trans Youth holds their weekly meeting tonight.

7pm St. Annes Episcopal Church

TUESDAY, MARCH 12

Catch the world premiere musical “Men With Money,” about three bachelors in New York – two of them gay and looking for love.

8pm, through April 7 Aurora Theatre

www.thegeorgiavoice.com

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 13

TEN Atlanta will once again transform from a crowded dance club into a cozy NYC Cabaret for consecutive Wednesday nights tonight with Boys Night “OUT” on Broadway, a one-hour musical and comedy revue written by Broadway veteran performer Robert Ray. 7 and 9pm

THURSDAY, MARCH 14

Tonight, Film Love continues its retrospective at the High Museum with

selections taken from the 2009 series Civil Rights on Film. These historic films are inspired responses to the challenge of representing segregation and the struggle for black Civil Rights onscreen. Produced in 1953 by the Georgia Department of Health as a training film for midwives, “All My Babies” documents the extraordinary working life of Mary Francis Hill Coley, an African-American midwife from Albany, Georgia. In the film, Coley assists two different families with their children’s births, and the contrast between these two families

KC and the Sunshine Band are still as widely popular today as they were when they first danced into the music scene 40 years ago. Harry Wayne Casey – KC for short – developed a unique fusion of R&B and funk, with a hint of a Latin percussion groove, giving us an impressive string of hits like “Get Down Tonight,” “That’s The Way (I Like It)” and “Shake Your Booty.” See the band sing their greatest hits tonight.

7:30pm Cobb Energy Performing Arts Centre

UPCOMING FRIDAY, MARCH 15

The acclaimed gay-themed film “Giant Little Ones,” about two teenage boys who have been best friends since they were small kids, and how one night changes everything, opens at the UA Tara today, various showtimes.

Also opening today is Ondi Timoner’s “Mapplethorpe,” starring Matt Smith as the ground-breaking gay photographer, Landmark Midtown Art Cinema, various showtimes.

The G8Yties ‘80s Dance Party returns to Heretic Atlanta! Special guest DJ ERIC will play his favorite collection of your favorite ‘80s songs with music videos on the big screen TVs throughout the club/bar.

10pm – 3am

SATURDAY, MARCH 16

Join Out On Film, AID Atlanta, Atlanta Pride and Out Front Theatre Company for AIDS Now, AIDS Then. Two to three films will be screened including “Buddies,” the first feature film to deal with HIV/AIDS, and 2017’s “Paris 05:59: Theo and Hugo,” tracing how HIV/AIDS has been portrayed in film since the ‘80s – and how its portrayal has evolved. The event is free and will feature a panel discussion after the films.

Noon – 6pm Out Front Theatre Company

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Melissa Carter Moving sucks. No matter how many times I’ve done it, followed by all the promises that the next time I’ll hire someone, I end up repeating the same old pattern of stress, dread, and packing those boxes myself. I must confess, however, this time has brought more emotional release than I expected.

The house I’m selling is the home Katie Jo and I shared together. It’s the home that we planned for our son in, learned of the loss of his twin in, brought our newborn baby to, and experienced the death of a pet in. Not to be overly dramatic but a house is a chest of memories and not simply an architectural structure, and this one has contained quite a bit. So this go around as I pack up things to keep and discard things to donate or sell, I’ve had to stop a time or two just to be nostalgic. It’s not quite like going through the break-up all over again, but it certainly has unearthed mourning that I didn’t realize needed to be fulfilled.

Why am I moving? Atlanta traffic. The neighborhood Katie moved to after leaving this home was only 10 miles away, and we thought that was close enough to have access to our son in an emergency yet far enough away to be out of each other’s lifestyles.

But the transportation of our son between places was interstate-dependent, and the trip would consistently last 1 1/2 to 2 hours, for again, a 10-mile commute.

When it came time for Katie to move again, we discussed Mr. Carter’s situation. Instead of

30 Columnists March 1, 2019

him being forced to deal with traffic and be in the car for what is the equivalent of a road trip every day, the burden would be on us to travel the farthest. That meant we had to pick an area of Atlanta to move to and thus be closer to one another. By the time she moved to our agreedupon location, our relationship had moved to a better place and we were okay with possibly sharing the same stores and restaurants. In fact, I thought it best for our son not to witness any awkwardness between his parents.

Since I own this home and have to get it ready to sell, the change is taking me a bit longer.

But I was proactive and got a storage unit near Katie’s home since I knew it would be near my new home. I slowly packed and moved boxes of things I wanted. That allowed me to begin sorting through the rest of those items.

But I now find living with these things I plan to discard has been a challenge, since many of them were shared items that spark some memory of my romantic time with Katie.

The house itself is a memory of that time, and this recent experience has made me fully realize the move is the right decision.

But I’m approaching it beyond any negative emotions as if to honor and thank the house for all that happened within its walls and say a real goodbye to the things I share the space with. Then, once I hand the keys over, it will finally be time not only to move but also to move on.

One of the first out radio personalities in Atlanta, Melissa’s worked for B98.5 and Q100. Catch her daily on theProgressive Voices podcast “She Persisted.” Tweet her! @MelissaCarter www.thegeorgiavoice.com

SOMETIMES ‘Y’

What Would You Do?

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Our society is turning into an episode of ABC’s “What Would You Do?” Of all of the possibilities in this golden age of television, we’ve decided to emulate a hidden-camera morality farce.

My long-standing beef with the insanely popular TV show is that it judges people for minding their own business. Producers create unambiguously improper scenarios to bait specific emotional reactions out of folks, and anyone who decides to not dive into the chaos of strangers is portrayed as heartless or amoral.

“What Would You Do?” is one of the most beloved “news” programs of this century, so it’s no surprise that its simplistic method of dealing with conflict would seep into real-world scenarios, even when such scenarios might be as staged as those on the television show.

Here’s one clip: A group of smarmy, entitled white teenagers wearing MAGA caps surround a lone Native American veteran, encircling the indigenous elder in omnious mockery. People of decency on the left and right witnessed this scene on their social media timelines, and responded with uniform indignation that would’ve given “What Would You Do?” viewers goosebumps.

The morality of the encounter becomes messier as new videos emerge, although I’ve seen no footage that dispels the first read of the Covington High School students as entitled, racist pricks. Still, we should heed this incident as a warning for how rapidly our righteousness can be stoked, and how it can be extinguished even quicker.

Here’s another clip, occurring mere days after the above: A black gay television star is attacked with a noose and bleach by two men who tell him Chicago is MAGA country. People of decency on the left and right … goosebumps.

The first reports about the alleged attack against former “Empire” star Jussie Smollett were sickening and heartbreaking, and the initial public response was predictably outraged. www.thegeorgiavoice.com

City Winery Cabaret “WHAT WOULD YOU DO?” HOST JOHN QUIÑONES

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PUBLICITY PHOTO

However, within hours I saw an eagerness among straight people to view the attack as a gay-hookup-gone-wrong, and desperation among gay folks to believe our brother.

Both sides began to dig trenches with flimsy sourcing of inflammatory details, and I realized there were no hidden cameras waiting for me to give a definitive opinion on a situation about which I knew almost nothing.

What Would I Do? Wait for more facts to emerge (i.e. mind my fucking business).

It hurt to see my straight friends giddily posting any development that cast doubt on Jussie’s story, and I would remind them that there were just as many articles alleging the opposite.

It hurt to see my gay friends ignoring any evidence (or lack thereof) about the validity of Smollett’s story, and I cautioned them against reaching any conclusions prematurely.

Sadly, it was the latter who felt like “What Would You Do?” producers, casting anyone who didn’t experience a specific emotional reaction to the unfolding story as heartless or amoral, homophobic or self-hating. Some of us became so invested in Jussie’s suffering and how it reflected our own, that anyone who was neutral or disbelieving of him was attacking us and our testimony.

I’ve always hated the way “What Would You Do?” manipulates people’s emotions, then host John Quiñones tries to laugh it off during the camera reveal. I admire those who responded to a brutal scenario with sympathy and solidarity, and it’s sad their feelings may have been manipulated for a moral farce.

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