07/24/20, Vol. 11 Issue 9

voice

georgia VOL.11 • ISSUE 9

GUEST EDITORIAL

TheGeorgiaVoice.com

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BUSINESS

Principal/Publisher: Tim Boyd tboyd@thegavoice.com

EDITORIAL

Deputy Editor: Katie Burkholder

kburkholder@thegavoice.com

Editorial Contributors: Cliff Bostock, Melissa Carter, Aidan Ivory Edwards, Jim Farmer, Vandy Beth Glenn, Jeff Graham, Amy Johnston, Bill Kaelin, Ryan Lee, Rose Pelham

PRODUCTION

Art Director: Rob Boeger rboeger@thegavoice.com

SALES

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Sales Executive: Jim Brams jbrams@thegavoice.com

Business Advisor: Lynn Pasqualetti Financial Firm of Record: HLM Financial Group National Advertising: Rivendell Media 908-232-2021 sales@rivendellmedia.com

Publisher Emeritus: Chris Cash

FINE PRINT

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PHOTO BY SHUTTERSTOCK / PHOTOGRAPHEE.EU

Providing Care for the Elderly in Our Community Debra Tyler-Horton AARP Georgia State Director For the estimated 3 million LGBTQ Americans age 50 and older, the past five decades have brought triumphs that were once unimaginable, from the birth of the Pride movement to marriage equality.

But now the so-called Stonewall generation — those who came of age around the 1969 uprising that galvanized the modern gay rights movement — faces a new set of challenges when it comes to aging with dignity.

According to AARP’s “2018 Maintaining Dignity Survey (www.aarp.org/research/ topics/life/info-2018/maintaining-dignity-lgbt. html),” 76 percent of LGBTQ adults age 45 and over worry about having adequate family and social support systems to fall back on as they grow older — and the majority worry about abuse, neglect and harassment in long-term care settings like assisted living or nursing home care.

Prepare to Care: A Guide for LGBTQ Caregivers If your loved one identifies as lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender (LGBTQ), you will probably face extra challenges around caregiving.

LGBTQ older adults are twice as likely to be single and four times less likely to have children than their non-LGBTQ counterparts. Many are estranged from their biological families, which means they’re less likely to have the traditional caregiver support that many older adults rely on.

Many people have the option of relying on in-home care from a friend, family member, or loved one. AARP understands that caregiving can be one of the most challenging, yet rewarding, experiences a person can undertake. In collaboration with SAGE, we have created Prepare to Care: A guide for LGBTQ Caregivers (www.aarp.org/content/ dam/aarp/home-and-family/caregiving/2017/05/ prepare-to-care-guide-lgbt-aarp.pdf). The role of caregiver might be one of the most significant opportunities you have to be responsible for the health and well-being of another person.

More information can be found at www.aarp.org/pride.

The Prepare to Care Guide is a practical tool created to help you. Here you’ll find information, resources, and checklists to help you get organized and find the support that you might need.

The Guide offers simple and practical tips to aid you in the discussion about caregiving. In addition, there are resources included to help you get the support you need as you embark on this journey.

As a caregiver, we realize that you will probably need someone to talk to, or might even want to belong to a group of caregivers. We invite you to learn more at AARP Community Connections (aarpcommunityconnections.org/).

This network is designed to help you find a group or start a group that can help you on your caregiving journey. You can also check out what’s available online by going to www.aarp.org/caregiving.

July 24, 2020 Editorial 3

CELEBRITY CLOSE-UP!

Celebrity Brief (THE ELDERS EDITION)

With time comes wisdom, and LGBTQ elders have more than enough to spare. Older LGBTQ celebrities share their thoughts on growing up, coming out, and making a difference.

“I suspected my homosexuality. But I’d never acted out on it ‘cause I was afraid of sex. It’s awful to be afraid of sex. But I’m afraid that’s what the ‘50s did to people. That, you know, it was just, sex is disgusting, it shouldn’t be talked about. Nudity is disgusting, and we just don’t talk about those kind of things.”

— Elton John on growing up gay (NPR)

“Ian McKellen and I had dinner one night, and it was just around the time he had come out [in 1988]. He told me I had to come out. And it really resonated with me. But I didn’t have the courage to do it until I was older.”

— Actor Victor Garber on waiting to publicly come out in 2013 at the age of 63 (Hollywood Reporter)

4 Celebrity Close-Up July 24, 2020

“Growing up, even in Lancashire, what is now Greater Manchester, 70 years ago, it was total silence,” he said. “There was no mention of sexuality other than heterosexuality at school, on the radio, in church. Absolute silence. Is it any wonder that people who are older, when things are hazy, they may think back to a time when things were different [and go back in the closet]?”

— Sir Ian McKellen on the need for his foundation of Pride in Aging, a Manchester-based program for LGBTQ people 50 years and older (BBC)

“At twelve I had an epiphany. I was daydreaming, and I thought, [in tennis] everybody wears white shoes, white socks, white clothes, we played with white balls in those days, and everybody who played was white. And I said, ‘Where is everybody else?’

That was the moment I promised I was going to fight for equality for the rest of my life.”

— Tennis star Billie Jean King on fighting for equality in sports (What Will It Take)

(PHOTOS VIA FACEBOOK)

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NEWS BRIEFS

HRC Endorses Jon Ossoff for US Senate Staff Reports The Human Rights Campaign has endorsed Georgia Democrat Jon Ossoff in the 2020 U.S. Senate race. Osoff is challenging Republican incumbent David Perdue who won the seat in 2015.

Alphonso David, president of HRC, issued this statement: “Despite support from 70% of the American public and a strong majority of his own party, Mitch McConnell has stood in the way of progress for LGBTQ people and refused to even allow a vote on the Equality Act. Today’s endorsements mark the next step of HRC’s efforts to elect a pro-equality U.S. Senate and end McConnell’s tenure as majority leader. Each of these candidates are true allies of our movement and will work to ensure LGBTQ people are treated with the respect and dignity every human deserves.

Together, united like never before, we can achieve the change our community needs.”

In response, Ossoff told Georgia Voice, “I’m honored to have the Human Rights Campaign’s support and look forward to working with them to secure human rights for all.”

The HRC endorsement and Ossoff ’s platform is likely to cheer LGBTQ Georgians and their supporters. If Senator Perdue’s history is any indication, he’s unlikely to attract that voting bloc. According to the archived 2014 Perdue for Senate website: “(I) believe that we must protect traditional marriage, keeping it clearly defined as between one man and one woman and believing in the sanctity of marriage are my deeply held personal convictions.”

“In the Senate, I’ll fight for equal rights and equal protection for all Americans,” Ossoff told Georgia Voice, “and proudly support the Equality Act, which will expand federal antidiscrimination protections to include gender and sexual orientation.”

City of Atlanta Hosts Virtual LGBTQ Opportunity Fair The City of Atlanta, in partnership with HRC Atlanta, One Atlanta, and OUT 6 News Briefs July 24, 2020

JON OSSOFF PHOTO VIA FACEBOOK

Georgia Business Alliance, is hosting a historic Virtual LGBTQ Opportunity Fair on Thursday, July 30. The fair is smartphone friendly and will last from 10am to 1pm.

wasn’t worsening depression and anxiety for people who already had it but was creating anxiety and depression in LGBTQ people who weren’t anxious or depressed prior.

The digital event is part of an initiative by Mayor Keisha Bottoms to leverage the power of government, the corporate sector, and non-profit organizations to ensure LGBTQ Atlantans are prepared and successful in the workforce. The event will include live video interviews with some of Atlanta’s foremost employers, complimentary resume building services, and LGBTQ-specific resources.

Depression was measured by a scale of 0-27, with 27 being the most severe depression, and anxiety was measured from 0-21. Among those who screened negative for depression at the first survey, the average score decreased by 1.08 on the scale. For those who tested negative, scores increased by 2.17. There was no score change on the anxiety scale for those who first tested positive, but scores increased by 3.93 for those who initially were negative.

Organizers for the fair include Transformation Journeys Worldwide, Atlanta Convention and Visitors Bureau, Bill Kaelin Marketing, and the National Center for Civil and Human Rights LGBTQ Institute, among others.

Registration is required and will open soon at atlgbtq.atlantaga.gov/opportunity. Organizers suggest RSVPing early to take advantage of the pre-fair resources like workshops and webinars.

Learn more on the City of Atlanta LGBTQ Affairs Facebook page.

More LGBTQ People are Experiencing Depression and Anxiety for the First Time Due to COVID-19 A new study shows that many members of the LGBTQ community are experiencing anxiety and depression for the first time because of the coronavirus pandemic. The survey of nearly 2,300 LGBTQ people found that, contrary to popular belief, the pandemic

“On an individual level, for some people there may not have been a very big change [in anxiety and depression], and for others, there was a big change,” said research Annesa Flentje with the San Francisco School of Nursing at the University of California. “We observed changes in these scores that are as big as the types of changes we see in the opposite direction when we use interventions that work to reduce anxiety and depression.”

This increase in anxiety and depression may be due to the stigma associated with being LGBTQ, as well as a higher chance to experience discrimination in COVIDrelated areas: according to research done by the Human Rights Campaign, “LGBTQ Americans are more likely than the general population to live in poverty and lack access to adequate medical care, paid medical leave, and basic necessities during the pandemic.

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July 24, 2020 Ads 7

NATIONAL NEWS

Mary Trump, A Lesbian, Says Family Used Racial, Anti-Semitic, and Homophobic Slurs Chris Johnson Washington Blade Mary Trump, whose tell-all book reveals new unflattering secrets about her uncle as he pursues re-election, is a lesbian and kept her sexual orientation a secret from her family in the late 1990s, according to multiple media accounts of the book.

Ahead a plan to marry her girlfriend on a Maui beach in 1999, Mary Trump a week before the ceremony found herself at the hospital with the rest of her family as her grandfather lay dying, InStyle Magazine reports.

Mary Trump decided to tell no one of her wedding plans, remembering that years earlier, her grandmother, Donald Trump ’s mother Mary Anne MacLeon Trump, had used a homophobic slur when referring to gay singer Elton John.

In a conversation about Princess Diana’s funeral, her grandmother allegedly said, “It’s a disgrace they’re letting that little faggot Elton John sing at the service,” according to an except from the LGBTQ blog Towleroad.

“I’d realized it was better that she didn’t know I was living with and engaged to a woman,” Mary Trump reportedly writes.

Mary Trump, who had rebuffed her family in the 2016 election and supported Hillary Clinton, has alleged many secrets in the book about Trump. Among them is an allegation Trump paid someone else to take the SAT in his place for his college application.

In an interview on MSNBC’s “Rachel Maddow Show,” Mary Trump said “yes” when asked if she heard her now president uncle express anti-Semitic slurs and the N-word, although she doesn’t divulge any further details about the alleged comments.

“Of course, I did,” Mary Trump said. “I 8 National News July 24, 2020

Screen capture via MSNBC on YouTube

Mary Trump is interviewed on the Rachel Maddow Show on MSNBC.

“Homophobia was never an issue because nobody ever talked about gay people, well, until my grandmother called Elton John a slur.”

— Mary Trump don’t think that should surprise anybody given how virulently racist he is today.”

The White House has pushed back against Mary Trump’s book and claims that President Trump has uttered racist or antiSemitic slurs.

“This is a book of falsehoods, plain and simple,” Deputy White House Press Secretary Sarah Matthews said. “The President doesn’t use those words.”

Mary Trump, however, in an interview

with the Washington Post on July 16, drew a contrast between her family views on LGBTQ people and other minorities, which she said was one of “a knee-jerk antiSemitism, a knee-jerk racism.”

“Growing up, it was sort of normal to hear them use the N-word or use anti-Semitic expressions,” she reportedly said.

Mary Trump added, “Homophobia was never an issue because nobody ever talked about gay people, well, until my grandmother called Elton John a slur.”

Mary Trump promotes the unflattering book about Trump as White House Press Secretary Kayleigh McEnany proclaimed this week her boss has a “great” record on LGBTQ issues.

LGBTQ advocates, however, were quick to point out that record includes anti-LGBTQ policies, such as a transgender military ban, arguing before the U.S. Supreme Court against the landmark decision in favor of LGBTQ inclusion under the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and allowing taxpayer-funded adoption agencies to refuse child placement into LGBTQ homes for religious reasons.

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YOUR VOICE

The Cause of the Protestors is Also Our Cause Rose Pelham The cause of the protestors is intrinsically linked with the cause for queer liberation.

On the evening of the 4th of July, I went to a downtown Atlanta protest for reparations for racism. I went for a number of reasons — because I think reparations for racism and all the harm done by white supremacy are necessary, and because there is no good in conviction without action — and that reparations will help the queer community.

That may seem like an odd claim, but the argument behind it is quite simple, and the reason is tragically on display nearly every time a trans woman is murdered.

Lately, there have been any number of calls to remember the spirit of Stonewall, and to bring back to the fore the figures of Marsha P. Johnson and Silvia Rivera against the whitewashing of that uprising’s history.

Phrases like “the first Pride was a riot” now circulate more than ever, and with a vengeance against the commercially sponsored parades of recent years. While the election of Trump not long after the success of the fight for marriage equality marked perhaps the formal rebuke against the “end of LGBTQ history hypothesis,” it now seems to be the moment when the emotional weight of that backlash has hit us. It has done so with a sharp reminder that our community is not composed solely of its most privileged members and that it extends across boundaries of race.

Queer equality could never be possible by addressing homophobia and transphobia alone, and as we approached the position of having nominally the same legal rights as straight people, racism and xenophobia catapulted Trump into the presidency with disastrous results. At the same time, the most oppressed in our community were, and are doubtless still, facing systemic racism, transphobia, and homophobia under circumstances in which it is likely a mistake to assume they can be disentangled from each other and solved piecemeal.

Which brings me back to the protest for 10 Your Voice July 24, 2020

Photo by Leonard Fink, Courtesy LGBT Community Center National History Archive

Lately, there have been any number of calls to remember the spirit of Stonewall, and to bring back to the fore the figures of Marsha P. Johnson (l) and Silvia Rivera (r) against the whitewashing of that uprising’s history.

reparations and the current moment, where we find ourselves in the midst of perhaps the greatest uprising since the sixties.

As we chanted, marching down the streets and blocking traffic, I could not help but think about some of the issues I have covered for this publication and the ways in which racism must interact with transphobia and homophobia beyond the mere addition of prejudice. The problem goes beyond the sad fact that Black transgender people face so much more danger than white transgender people. It extends to systems of policing that target Black transgender women, and other transgender people of color, on suspicion of being sex workers, assaulting them, arresting them, and extorting sexual services from them on threat of arrest. It extends to jails and prisons where trans people are deliberately treated as the wrong gender, as a kind of cruel punishment that exposes them to great danger. And it extends to

ICE detention centers where HIV-positive LGBTQ people have died after being beaten and denied their medication. Transphobia and homophobia must be at their worst when in the company of racism.

I do not make these arguments in order to falsely claim that white transgender people are the direct victims of racism, only that the racism all too systemic within the United States operates in tandem with the structures violently enforcing hetero/ cisnormativity, in such a way that the latter cannot be addressed in isolation from the former.

In a world where we have abolished white supremacy, fewer trans people would be murdered each year. For that matter, defunding the police would drastically improve the lives of LGBTQ sex workers.

The end of mass incarceration would mean greater safety for all LGBTQ people, since

there would no longer be the threat of prison and its omnipresent prejudice, violence and degradation. And yes, reparations for racism would help our community as a whole.

It would be a boon to a major portion of our community, reducing inequality among queer people by repairing the harm done to those who are the most discriminated against.

In other words, it would substantially reduce the total burden of discrimination upon our community as a whole.

But if we fail to acknowledge and take action against the racism that harms so many in our community, we will never be able to achieve true equality for all queer people.

After all: only when Black trans lives matter, do trans lives matter.

Rest in power John Lewis. We have lost a hero of unequaled moral character — the conscience of our times.

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YOUR VOICE

The Real Virus Bill Kaelin bill@billkaelin.com

We are not OK. This is not normal. We all must acknowledge we are in a crisis, that we are in danger and that things are very serious. Things are not right.

This is not how we are supposed to be living our lives. We are meant to hug one another.

We shouldn’t be kept away from our family, from our friends, from our loved ones.

People are dying. Young people are dying.

Babies are dying. It is not just the elderly who are passing away. This pandemic is not just confined to nursing homes. Funerals should not be restricted to a guest list.

We should be able to celebrate our birthdays, to get married, to graduate from school — to even go to school.

Zoom calls are annoying. We have the right to go to work, to make money. We should be able to follow our dreams. Being forced to be unemployed is not fair. Having to close your business due to the incompetence and failed leadership of others is criminal. Being forced to spend your life savings to cover your rent and to put food on your table is the equivalent of the government stealing from you.

Going to the park with a blanket with friends should not have to be done six feet apart.

Going to see a band or a DJ and to dance in a communal space should be good for you, not a potential death sentence. Virtual dance parties suck. Going to a museum or the theater and experiencing the arts is meant to heal, not to be a risk to your health.

Our borders are not supposed to be closed.

We should not feel trapped in the city in which we live. We should be able to visit other states in our own country without feeling like an immigrant. Never leaving our homes is unhealthy. Being scared to TheGeorgiaVoice.com

ILLUSTRATION BY SHUTTERSTOCK / VECTORFARMER

perform basic tasks like going to the grocery store, getting a haircut, or going to the gym is increasing the number of people suffering from obsessive compulsive disorder.

Thoughts of impending doom, depression, loss of hope and even suicide are on the rise. No matter how much we joke about it, having cocktails at 3pm to curb the pain, to deal with the boredom and to justify the insanity of it all is not a laughing matter.

Taking a sleeping pill or Xanax to turn off your mind or get a good night’s sleep is a habit many of us are forming. Selfmedication is becoming more normal than ever and accidental overdoses are on the rise.

Science is real. The CDC is an organization we trust and rely on for epidemiological information. The White House should not

be taking over for it. We listen to doctors over politicians and normally would be joining forces with the world by using global resources to fight a pandemic.

Testing is essential. Tracking the virus is necessary. The number of infections increasing has nothing to do with testing and everything to do with failed leadership locally, nationally and statewide.

Wearing a mask is awful. It is uncomfortable.

It is not normal. It is scary. It is inconvenient.

It is not how we all want to live our daily lives, but it is necessary. It is the only proven strategy to help stop the madness and is equivalent to loving your neighbor.

The number of lies we are being told on a daily basis is unprecedented. All of this could have been over by now. The gaslighting we

are constantly going up against is beginning to affect us all. We are a nation in an abusive relationship. It did not have to be this way.

This is not a “Democratic hoax.” It is not going to just magically disappear. The world did not unite to create one big conspiracy to get one insecure, uneducated, narcissistic leader out of office. We should be able to look to our government for facts, to unify us, to keep us safe. The government works for us.

It didn’t have to be this hard. Don’t accept this new reality. This is NOT the new normal.

As a nation we have hit rock bottom. America is sick. We have an aggressive microorganism at the very top making all of us more ill than COVID-19 ever could. The only cure is to vote it out November 3. It is the only way we all will survive.

July 24, 2020 Your Voice 11

Restaurant GUIDE

YOUR GUIDE TO LOCAL EATERIES

12 Restaurant Guide July 24, 2020

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Restaurant GUIDE

YOUR GUIDE TO LOCAL EATERIES

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July 24, 2020 Restaurant Guide 13

COMMUNITY STRONG

Feeding the Needy in Our Community Toco Hills Community Alliance provides assistance to those impacted by economic crisis during pandemic

We were in the same boat: 70% of our volunteers are at-risk either due to health issues or because of their age.

Lynn Pasqualetti “What has it been like running a food pantry during COVID-19” is the question Tim Boyd, Publisher of Georgia Voice, asked me. I am Lynn Pasqualetti, President/Board Chair of Toco Hills Community Alliance (THCA), and the words I use to describe our work since COVID-19 are “intense,” “stressful,” “physical,” and “fulfilling.”

THCA in non-COVID-19 times is a food and clothing pantry of choice serving about 225 families that also has an amazing hot lunch for those experiencing food insecurity in a nine ZIP code service area in DeKalb County. We are open three days a week — Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, using Monday and Friday as our food intake and processing days to prepare for clients. Our clients must be at or below 140% of the published poverty rate, which is $1354 a month for a single person and $471 per month per additional person. If the client is experiencing homelessness or is a veteran, they can be served outside our ZIP code area.

We are an independent 501(c)(3) and a partner agency with Atlanta Community Food Bank (ACFB). Our relationship as a partner agency with ACFB allows us to take advantage of available USDA food and also allows us to purchase food from them at deeply discounted rates. We are normally a pantry of choice, meaning our clients come in and get to shop for the foods they would like to eat. While they are waiting to shop, we provide a hot meal for lunch.

Typically this consists of three meats, two or three vegetables, side dishes, salads, dessert and drinks prepared fresh each day by our amazing volunteer cooks. Many of our clients come for groceries, but ACFB has also become a place for clients to socialize and meet people they have come to know over the years of getting services, creating lasting relationships.

14 Community Strong July 24, 2020

PHOTO COURTESY OF TOCO HILLS COMMUNITY ALLIANCE

We have been very fortunate to have many young people who are temporarily unemployed volunteer to pick up the slack for our seniors who have not been able to come in due to the risks.

Our client base is 25% seniors, 15% veterans, 15% homeless, of which the majority are LGBTQ+ individuals, and 45% single people or families between 19 and 59 years old.

Since COVID-19, we are serving 425–500 families per week. We cannot have hundreds of people in our building and there is no way to social distance in our space, so we have moved to pre-packed boxes of food, including canned and dry goods, bread, fruit, vegetables, desserts and meats, and we are now serving people in a drive-up pantry.

Those without transportation can walk up and get food. Hot lunches are no longer being served. Just recently we started putting clothing on rolling racks and taking them outside from 11:30–12:30 on Wednesday and Thursday of each week.

Our dining room is now a staging area for 150–200 boxes per day that are packed by our volunteers. It is backbreaking work, since you have to move cases and cases of food from one end of the building to another and each box has to be packaged with the dry goods. The following morning, the boxes have to be moved to carts so we

Based on the COVID-19 rules, food banks are considered essential, so we were able to stay open, but we could have no more than 10 people in the building at a time and we had to keep the public out of the building, wear masks, wear gloves, sanitize everything and stay six feet apart at all times. Imagine 10 people doing the work that 25–30 used to do and doubling the volume. Because a national emergency was declared, we were able to have the National Guard assist us, so since March 20 we have had two to four guardsmen assisting us. That has been a huge help.

can add in the perishable items and then they have to be moved out to the hallway and porch for distribution in the afternoon.

We have been very fortunate to have many young people who are temporarily unemployed volunteer to pick up the slack for our seniors who have not been able to come in due to the risks. Additionally, the public has been amazing; with additional food donations and general financial donations, we have been able to fund the increase in volume.

Every box or bag of food has to be loaded into the trunk of the car for each family or handed to those who walk up. An average box of food is approximately 50 pounds. As our Executive Director, the Rev. Dr. Lisa Heilig, says, it is like playing food Tetris for eight hours a day.

While we have enjoyed so much support up to now from the community, I worry about long-term sustainability as our economy struggles to recover. As soon as the $600 per week unemployment runs out, I know we will see another uptick in volume.

We are a volunteer-based organization with just three paid employees, two of whom are part-time. Our Executive Director is our only full-time employee. Our Volunteer Coordinator and our Kitchen Coordinator are both part-time. We have two contract people who come in and clean the building in the evening to make sure the building is clean and ready for the next day. The remainder of our staff are all volunteers, including me and our entire board of directors.

What can you do to help THCA? Make a recurring cash donation of at least $100 per month for the next 18 plus months or a one-time $1800 donation via our website, www.tocohillsalliance.org. This will allow us to purchase from ACFB 10 times the amount of food we could buy at the store.

In other words, $10 allows us to buy $100 worth of food from ACFB.

Our clients were worried we were going to close completely. Many pantries did exactly that, because most of them were run by volunteers over the age of 65, the primary at-risk group for coronavirus infection.

We are neighbors helping neighbors. Help us feed our struggling brothers and sisters.

Lynn Pasqualetti is the President/Chair of Toco Hills Community Alliance. lynn@tocohillsalliance.org www.tocohillsalliance.org TheGeorgiaVoice.com

SENIORS & AGING

Creating Equality in Caregiving Participants needed in a six-week course for LGBTQ caregivers of dementia patients

“It can be hard [for caretakers] to identify helpful resources, and [helping guide them] is something I’m very personally passionate about. I want to use my research platform to be able to help others.”

Katie Burkholder Caretaking is no easy feat; it’s an emotionally and physically taxing responsibility that requires help and support. However, for many LGBTQ caregivers, inclusive support can be difficult to find. Many existing courses and resources for caregivers of Alzheimer’s patients aren’t tailored to the specific needs and experiences of the LGBTQ community.

That’s why Dr. Whitney Wharton, a clinical investigator and cognitive neuroscientist at Emory University, is developing a course made specifically for LGBTQ caregivers in the Atlanta area. Inspired by her own experience seeking support as a caretaker, Dr. Wharton hopes to inspire confidence in LGBTQ caregivers while addressing the possible shortcomings that exist in the world of Alzheimer’s prevention research.

“I am a caregiver for a cancer patient, so I am familiar with the role.

I was looking at an existing program for my work with dementia that I thought was was helpful, but I didn’t necessarily see myself in,” Dr. Wharton, (above left), told Georgia Voice.

“Some of the language and examples used weren’t representative of an LGBTQ person’s interaction with a person with dementia.”

Dr. Wharton has dedicated the last decade of her life to research focusing on individuals who are underrepresented in the realm of dementia caregiving, including African Americans and the LGBTQ community.

The latest of this research is an educational intervention course, titles “Equality in Caregiving.” The six-week course will provide LGBTQ primary caregivers with useful tools to manage the day-to-day life of caretaking, while connecting them 16 Seniors & Aging July 24, 2020

PHOTO BY SHUTTERSTOCK / PHOTOGRAPHEE.EU

with resources relevant to their own personal needs.

The course is a modification of the Savvy Caregiver Program — an existing educational intervention that has been proven to be effective for dementia caregivers — to be more applicable to the LGBTQ community. It is being developed with the help of a community advisory board, which includes leaders of ZAMI NOBLA, AARP, and the Alzheimer’s Association. It will cover four central tenets: • Managing daily life. Participants will learn how to help a person with dementia have days that are as calm, safe, and pleasant as possible.

• Managing specific situations. Participants will learn how to understand and guide the behaviors of the dementia patient that are concerning and possibly troublesome. They will gain tools and skills to avoid and redirect this behavior to prevent distress.

• Managing own well-being. Participants will be given tools to examine their feelings concerning caregiving, stress, and triggers so they can better manage their own self-care.

• Managing resources. Participants will be connected with two types of resources:

generalized organizations and resources pertaining to Alzheimer’s and the LGBTQ community, and personalized institutions, like religious services, legal assistance, and hospice assistance, that are determined by the caretaker’s personal needs.

“It’s a structured and interactive program,” Dr. Wharton said. “We’ll give education about dementia, caregiving, symptoms of the disease, and ways to cope in this new COVID world … We’re just giving the information, we’re not pushing any sort of facility, company, or resource. We’re just letting people know what’s out there in hopes they find something that works for them in their personal situation while tailoring the information to the LGBTQ community.”

Currently, Dr. Wharton and the other researchers are planning participation restricted to those in Georgia, “so we can provide region-specific resources,” but once it is fully developed, the course will be made available in other cities, free of charge.

The course is currently in developmental research stages, and participants are needed.

To qualify, you must be LGBTQ, 18 or older, and the caregiver of a person with dementia. You must also have normal memory and thinking abilities. Participants

— Dr. Whitney Wharton, a clinical investigator and cognitive neuroscientist at Emory University will be compensated $150. Requirements of participants include a medical history and health questionnaire, one 90-minute focus group, and attendance at the six weekly Zoom calls, which will be held in the evenings and last approximately one and a half hours.

“I hope participants come out of this class with a sense of confidence regarding caregiver mastery. To me, that means being more confident in how to manage those four tenets,” Dr. Wharton said. “For us [as researchers], I hope we can understand the gaps where resources aren’t available.”

“It can be hard [for caretakers] to identify helpful resources, and [helping guide them] is something I’m very personally passionate about,” Dr. Wharton continued. “I want to use my research platform to be able to help others.”

If you’re interested in taking the course or want to learn more, you can contact the research team at 404-712-2654 or email Dr. Wharton at w.wharton@emory.edu.

TheGeorgiaVoice.com

SENIORS & AGING

Alzheimer’s Association’s Tips for Caregiving During COVID-19 Pandemic Amy Johnston

video chats or even emails to check in.

• If your family member is unable to engage in calls or video chats, ask the facility how you can keep in touch with facility staff in order to get updates.

Most likely, dementia does not increase risk for COVID-19, the respiratory illness caused by the new coronavirus, just like dementia does not increase risk for flu. However, dementia-related behaviors, increased age and common health conditions that often accompany dementia may increase risk.

Considerations if your family member’s residential facility has an incidence of COVID-19 It is important to note that there are no simple answers, and at this time, there is no way to completely eliminate the risk of your family member being exposed to COVID-19.

However, there are some questions to consider if you are faced with this situation.

The answers to these questions can help you make the best decision for your family.

For example, people with Alzheimer’s disease and all other dementia may forget to wash their hands or take other recommended precautions to prevent illness. In addition, diseases like COVID-19 and the flu may worsen cognitive impairment due to dementia.

Tips for dementia caregivers at home Caregivers of individuals living with Alzheimer’s and all other dementia should follow guidelines from the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) (www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/ prevent-getting-sick/prevention.html) and consider the following tips: • For people living with dementia, increased confusion is often the first symptom of any illness. If a person living with dementia shows rapidly increased confusion, contact your health care provider for advice. Unless the person is having difficulty breathing or a very high fever, it is recommended that you call your health care provider instead of going directly to an emergency room. Your doctor may be able to treat the person without a visit to the hospital.

• People living with dementia may need extra and/or written reminders and support to remember important hygienic practices from one day to the next.

• Consider placing signs in the bathroom and elsewhere to remind people with dementia to wash their hands with soap for 20 seconds.

• Demonstrate thorough hand-washing.

• Alcohol-based hand sanitizer with at least 60% alcohol can be a quick alternative to hand-washing if the person with dementia cannot get to a sink or wash their hands easily.

• Ask your pharmacist or doctor about filling TheGeorgiaVoice.com

PHOTO COURTESY OF ALZHEIMER’S ASSOCIATION

prescriptions for a greater number of days to reduce trips to the pharmacy.

• Think ahead and make alternative plans for the person with dementia should adult day care, respite, etc. be modified or cancelled in response to COVID-19.

• Think ahead and make alternative plans for care management if the primary caregiver should become sick.

Tips for supporting persons with dementia who receive home-based services If you currently receive or plan to receive services from a paid health care professional in your home: • Contact the home health care provider and ask them to explain their protocols to reduce the spread of COVID-19.

• Check the home health care professional’s temperature before they enter your home.

Anyone with a temperature over 100.4° F should be excluded from providing care.

• Ask the health care professional if they have been exposed to anyone who has tested positive, and if so, do not allow them into your home.

• Ensure that the health care professional washes their hands upon arrival and regularly throughout their time in your home.

• Ask the health care professional to wear a mask.

• Be aware that bringing anyone into your home increases the risk of spreading COVID-19, even if CDC guidance is followed.

Tips for supporting persons with dementia who live in long-term care or residential care settings The CDC has provided guidance on infection control and prevention of COVID-19 in nursing homes (www.cdc.gov/ coronavirus/2019-ncov/hcp/long-term-care. html). This guidance is for the health and safety of residents. Precautions may vary based on local situations.

• Check with the facility regarding their procedures for managing COVID-19 risk.

Ensure they have your emergency contact information and the information of another family member or friend as a backup.

• Do not visit your family member if you have any signs or symptoms of illness.

• Depending on the situation in your local area, facilities may limit or not allow visitors. This is to protect the residents, but it can be difficult if you are unable to see your family member.

• If visitation is not allowed, ask the facility how you can have contact with your family member. Options include telephone calls,

Keeping the person in the facility • Ask the facility about their quarantine procedures. What is your level of confidence that CDC guidelines are being followed?

• How many people in the facility have been impacted by COVID-19? Are those affected staff, residents or both?

• Is your family member able to follow social distancing procedures (with or without help)?

• In some cases, the person may not be able to walk or move about on their own. This could help maintain social distancing.

• Does the facility have and use personal protective equipment?

• How many staff members interact with your family member on a regular basis? Is the facility able to limit the number of staff who work with your family member?

• Is the facility adequately staffed to provide the level of care your family member requires?

Staying healthy Pay attention to flu or pneumonia-like symptoms in yourself and others and report them to a medical professional immediately.

Follow current guidance and instruction from the CDC regarding COVID-19. Tips to keep yourself and your loved ones healthy include: • Avoid close contact with people who are sick.

• Avoid touching your eyes, nose and mouth.

July 24, 2020 Seniors & Aging 17

SENIORS & AGING

COVID in Incarceration LGBTQ seniors in prisons face unchecked COVID-19 pandemic

Initiative (eji.org/news/covid-19s-impact-onpeople-in-prison), “nationwide, the known infection rate for COVID-19 in jails and prisons is about two and a half times higher than in the general population.” Access to medical care in prisons is also more restricted, and frequently substandard, almost certainly leading to a higher death rate for those who become infected.

Rose Pelham Incarcerated LGBTQ seniors were already in a precarious situation before the pandemic.

Now, elderly people are dying from COVID-19 in Georgia prisons.

Georgia Voice asked to interview members of the parole board, but was denied the request.

In the month of May alone, the Georgia Department of Corrections (GDC) issued eight press releases listing the names of people who died from COVID-19 in state prisons. All were over 50.

Since June, the GDC has quietly ceased issuing press releases when prisoners die from COVID-19, but according to the Marshall Project (www.themarshallproject. org/2020/05/01/a-state-by-state-look-atcoronavirus-in-prisons), eight people have died from the virus in Georgia prisons between the start of June and the time of writing. Because these deaths were not officially announced by the Department of Corrections, it is nearly impossible to determine who has died, and whether they were an older adult.

According to the GDC website, 25 incarcerated people have died from the pandemic, as well as one prison staff member.

According to the Marshall Project report cited earlier, that places Georgia as having the seventh highest total number of COVID deaths in state prisons of any state, and the 13th highest COVID-19 fatality rate.

Before the pandemic, Georgia held around 52,200 people in state prisons. That number has gone down, marginally, since the start of the pandemic, but not because of compassionate releases of those at risk from the novel coronavirus. According to another report (www.themarshallproject. org/2020/07/16/prison-populations-drop-by100-000-during-pandemic) by the Marshall Project, “while many people may be qualified 18 Seniors & Aging July 24, 2020

Overall, data specific to older LGBTQ people in prison is difficult to find, with no readily accessible studies covering the exact topic. That makes it difficult to determine whether older LGBTQ people in prison are more in danger from the pandemic than the general population. There are, however, studies that look at the treatment of the LGBTQ prison population. From these studies (transequality.org/sites/default/files/docs/ resources/TransgenderPeopleBehindBars.pdf) it is known that incarcerated LGBTQ people face extremely disproportionate rates of sexual violence, as well as other violence, from both staff and other prisoners.

PHOTO COURTESY OF THE GEORGIA DEPARTMENT OF CORRECTIONS

for early releases, very few actually got out.”

Instead, a variety of factors from the pandemic slowed the rate at which people enter the prison system. In Georgia, that translated to a reduction in the prison population from around 52,200 to just under 52,000.

Back in May, Georgia Voice contacted the ACLU of Georgia in order to better understand the status of efforts to secure compassionate releases for elderly prisoners.

At the time, Staff Attorney Kosha Tucker was petitioning for the release of six nonviolent prisoners over the age of 60.

Unfortunately, the transcript for that interview was lost, but notes taken from it indicate that the parole board at the time had not released any of the people on whose behalf the ACLU was petitioning, and that one person who was considered an ideal

candidate for compassionate release had been explicitly denied parole.

Georgia Voice contacted the ACLU of Georgia again in July but was unable to schedule a follow-up interview with Tucker before the time of writing. It is unclear whether any of the older adults on whose behalf the ACLU petitioned for release have been granted parole. Given the minimal reduction in the Georgia prison population during the pandemic, it seems unlikely that the state parole board is granting any significant number of compassionate releases to those most in danger within Georgia prisons.

The lack of compassionate release for elderly people in Georgia prisons likely means that older adults will die who might have otherwise avoided becoming sick with COVID-19. According to the Equal Justice

Older LGBTQ adults outside of prison face numerous challenges stemming from discrimination in matters ranging from employment, to housing, to health care, according to a 2017 report authored by the Movement Advancement Project and SAGE. Nearly half of “transgender older adults” live “at or below 200% of the federal poverty level,” with the same being true of bisexual elders. Poverty and lack of family support are both known to be factors that increase the likelihood of becoming homeless after release from prison.

For this article, Georgia Voice sent three open records requests to the GDC requesting documents relating to LGBTQ accommodations, COVID-19 testing request denials, and COVID-19 protections for seniors. As of the time of writing, no reply was received, but future articles may be updated with the findings.

TheGeorgiaVoice.com

SENIORS & AGING

SAGE Serves and Connects LGBTQ Elders The organization advocates for LGBTQ seniors while creating connections across generations

“Creating connections across generations is a super important and meaningful way for people to connect, especially right now, when we’re forced to divide up based on age,” Worthington said of the program.

Katie Burkholder

While in the past, people were encouraged to organize meals in-person, many are now doing it virtually. People have been connecting across generations via online video platforms like Zoom, where they break off into small groups of four or five and connect using SAGE’s discussion guide as a starting off point.

The aging experience is largely universal, but after living a lifetime of discrimination, the LGBT elder experience is a unique one, and SAGE isn’t letting it be erased. The national organization offers programs, services, and advocacy opportunities tailored to LGBT older adults. Serena Worthington, the director for US and global collaborations at SAGE, talked to Georgia Voice about this underrepresented group and how the organization is making them visible on the national level.

“There’s a lot of commonalities across populations when it comes to the aging experience, but LGBT older adults have some unique disparities,” Worthington said, disparities that are crucial to consider when providing care and services to LGBT elders. These differences include the economic insecurity caused and exacerbated by discrimination, which leads to more dependence on government services and less social mobility. LGBT elders are also more likely to be single and live alone and less likely to have children, all of which exacerbates loneliness and isolation.

“We often hear when we’re talking to institutions about policy changes or cultural competency training, ‘Well, we treat everyone the same,’” Worthington said. “We know that means they’re ignoring these differences … By not acknowledging that somebody has an LGBT identity, it’s a form of erasure. You’re just saying, ‘That part of you doesn’t matter.’”

That’s why SAGE was created: to tell LGBT elders, “You do matter.” From providing resources like the National Center for LGBT Aging to connective programs like SAGE Table, SAGE Connect, and their 24/7 hotline, SAGE is ensuring LGBT seniors feel seen.

TheGeorgiaVoice.com

You can host a SAGE Table anywhere at any time. Register as a host at sageusa.org/sagetable-host-registration and promote your event on their Facebook page.

PHOTO COURTESY OF SAGE

National Center for LGBT Aging The National Center for LGBT Aging is the country’s first and only LGBT aging resource center. “If you want to know more as a consumer, provider, or policymaker, there is an amazing wealth of resources,” Worthington said. Resources include academic research, community-based research, interviews with leaders in the aging field, and stories by and for LGBT elders. The center can also connect you with local resources based on your state, as well as COVID-19 specific information.

Access the center at lgbtagingcenter.org.

National LGBT Elder Hotline This 24/7 hotline connects you with someone trained in crisis response who can answer questions with factual and confidential answers, offer support without judgment, and provide community support resources. The hotline is offered in English, Spanish, and 180 other languages on request.

You can call the hotline at 877-360-5428.

SAGEConnect Launched in response to the COVID-19

pandemic, SAGEConnect is a volunteerbased program to combat social isolation.

SAGEConnect matches participants with volunteers based on availability and geography for a once-a-week, 15-minute phone call. The goal of the calls is to bring people together and offer social connection to those who need it, but volunteers can also direct callers to necessary resources.

While SAGE had wanted to implement the program for years, the coronavirus got the ball rolling. “We wanted to do this program for some time, but there were significant things that needed to be worked out before we could do it,” Worthington told Georgia Voice. “Then, when [the coronavirus] lockdown started, we knew we just had to do it. Something we had been thinking about for years we built in two weeks.”

If you want to either make or receive calls, you can register at sageusa.org/sageconnect.

SAGE Table SAGE Table takes connection one step further, encouraging people to sit down and share a meal across generations.

Advocacy Along with providing these fantastic programs, SAGE is involved with advocating for older people on the federal level. Through their National Day of Advocacy, LGBT elders, allies, affiliate leaders, and activists from across the nation go to Washington, D.C. to advocate for LGBT elders’ rights. Although their 2020 National Day of Advocacy was cancelled because of the pandemic, SAGE joined a coalition of national organizations for a Virtual Lobby Day for the Equality Act on July 14. Volunteers made over 1,100 calls to senators and representatives in support of the Equality Act. Worthington urges LGBT elders to get involved in advocacy, not just through SAGE but also other national and local organizations. Some she suggests are the National Center for Transgender Equality, PFLAG, ZAMI NOBLA, Georgia Equality, the National Equality Action Team, AARP, and Freedom for All Americans.

“LGBT elders are a compelling voice because of their lived experience and their lifetimes of activism,” she said. “They’re persuasive to lawmakers; the older voter is an important person for lawmakers to listen to.”

For more information on SAGE, visit sageusa.org.

July 24, 2020 Seniors & Aging 19

JIM FARMER ACTING OUT

Ones to Watch — “Mucho Mucho Amor” and “Disclosure”

Documentaries look at trans and non-binary characters

the recent Apple TV+ series,”Visible: Out On Television.” Many of the early representations of trans people were negative and others ridiculed their trans characters. Feder uses his film to trace where we are now in representation.

While we all wait for a time when movie theaters and playhouses can open again, we can at least revel in all the LGBTQ/LGBTQfriendly fare on television. As it has been doing all spring, Netflix seems to be leading the way with queer content.

On tap now are two fine documentaries, “Mucho Mucho Amor: The Legend of Walter Mercado” and “Disclosure.”

“Mucho Mucho Amor,” which debuted at Sundance this year, is a spirited look at Walter Mercado, the flamboyant, easy-tolove Puerto Rican who became the world’s most famous astrologer. People would flock to their TV sets to watch him and get their horoscopes. After entertaining people for decades, though, he pretty much disappeared.

Directed by Cristina Costantini and Kareem Tabsch, the documentary examines what happened to Mercado amid a relationship with a controlling agent. It also charts his comeback. Late in the film, Lin-Manuel Miranda visits Mercado and their meeting — they are longtime, enthusiastic fans of each other — is one of the highlights. This is a giddy, affectionate look at a man who marched to his own tune. Many people assume Mercado was gay, living with a devoted male assistant for decades, but Mercado never fully addressed his sexuality. Others claimed he was nonbinary, but he refused any labels and empowered many in the LGBTQ community. This is a heartfelt look at a beloved man who only wanted to please.

20 Columnist July 24, 2020

One of the early groundbreakers was “Paris is Burning,” which Rodriguez recalls watching, but didn’t realize its significance at the time. Other positive images have come in the Oscar-winning “A Fantastic Woman” and — of course — “Pose,” which has a high number of transgender artists in front of and behind the camera. The film also tackles the controversial issue of having cisgender actors playing transgender characters. Some, such as Hilary Swank and Jared Leto, have won Academy Awards for doing so, and that effect is discussed and debated. While trans representation is higher these days, it can improve. Some subjects remind us that transgender people, especially women, are being killed at a disturbingly high rate.

Publicity photo by Netflix

Laverne Cox stars in “Disclosure,” a documentary about transgender representation in television and film.

Also on Netflix is “Disclosure,” another film that debuted at the 2020 Sundance Film Festival. Looking at the history of transgender representation in television and film, it’s far and away one of the best documentaries of the year. It’s estimated that 80% of Americans do not know a person who identifies as transgender.

As such, these individuals get their information from the media images they see. Laverne Cox, one of the producers, is one of the subjects as well, and speaks vividly about what she watched growing up in Alabama.

Among the other subjects interviewed are Mj Rodriguez, Chaz Bono, Alexandra

Billings and filmmaker Lilly Wachowski of “Matrix” movies. Candis Cayne, who made history as the first transgender actress to play a recurring trans character on a television series in “Dirty Sexy Money,” jokes about the number of times characters she has played have died. She also remembers watching “Dressed to Kill” as a teenager and identifying with the glamour of the Angie Dickinson character, only to see her killed off by the villainous Michael Caine man-in-a-dress character.

As directed by Sam Feder, himself a trans man, “Disclosure” is fascinating and entertaining, a swell companion piece to the film, “The Celluloid Closet” and

Both “Mucho Mucho Amor” and “Disclosure” are extremely satisfying. “Tiger King” is the documentary that seemed to capture America’s imagination earlier this year, but these two are much stronger works.

This weekend, the Atlanta Jewish Film Festival returns a favorite from earlier this year. A screening of “Flawless,” about a new student at a cliquish Jewish school, will feature a talkback from its lead actress, Stav Strashko, who became the first transgender woman nominated for Israel’s most prestigious acting prize (the Ophir Award) for Best Actress. “Flawless” is a very good film, touching on issues such as self-esteem, beauty, and peer pressure.

The film and the talkback can be viewed on Sunday, July 26 at noon at www.ajff. org/inconversationwebinar/flawless.

TheGeorgiaVoice.com

CLIFF BOSTOCK OLD GAY MEN

The Soothing Nostalgia of Online Reminiscing One of the inevitable conditions of aging is nostalgia, the yearning for the old days when you were a young, optimistic lad with the feeling you had all the time in the world to, say, win a bodybuilding competition while wearing a homemade thong that gained such admiration that you launched an underwear company that then made you fabulously wealthy. But, instead, reality chewed you up and turned your life into something pathetically average. You feel unbearable regret. Then, speaking of thongs, you happily reminisce about the days when your penis was always nine inches of rockhard irresistible bait on Piedmont Park’s tree trails. Then, you’re remembering your first lover. He died of AIDS. You want to cry.

You loved him so much … And off you go into the romanticized past. We repeat this constantly. Why? Psychology, which tends to pathologize everything, doesn’t have a consistent explanation. To me, nostalgia is storytelling with a point of view that reflects our present needs (just as dreams do). It often both exposes us to and rescues us from regret. If I feel unloved, for example, I do indeed spontaneously remember my first partner who died of AIDS and all the beautiful times we had together. For that moment, I forget the time he was high on Quaaludes and kicked me down the stairs. Is the selective memory in a state of such daydreaming harmful? I don’t really think so. It supplies comfort and, anyway, all memory really is fantasy.

A scene from “Sunset Boulevard” PUBLICITY PHOTO

Nostalgia also binds us in positive ways to other people. Arguably, a principal function of Facebook is nostalgia. There are large groups specifically created to cultivate it. A particularly rich one is “You’ve lived in GAY Atlanta a long time if you remember …”

It’s a private group and the administrators insist on respect. Most helpfully, they outlaw discussion of news events.

Frequently, someone brings up a partial memory and asks for help recalling the whole story. So you get, for example, the tale of RuPaul’s time in Atlanta told from different points of view. The important TheGeorgiaVoice.com

thing that emerges is not so much a factual account of Ru’s story. It is instead the story of our gay community then and, by comparison, how we feel about ourselves now. The memory itself is bittersweet, a feeling that is inherently pleasurable.

This re-creation of youth even extends to the material. Someone asks if anyone remembers, say, a café in a building that was torn down long ago. In such exchanges, the landscape of Atlanta “back then” emerges in the mind’s eye. It’s more than a picture, because the way it’s remembered again describes what it was

like to move through our city’s space then as a gay person.

I admit sharing memories made me very nervous at first. I wrote a controversial biweekly column for seven years that seemed to enrage every gay white man in Atlanta, because I argued against assimilation and for the radical politics of ACT UP.

I suppose nostalgia can be a trap in extreme cases. I mean it didn’t do Norma Desmond, beloved by the gays, much good in “Sunset Boulevard.” You do know who that is, right?

If you do not, then you likely do not know what camp is, and if you do not know what camp is, you are detached from your aesthetic heritage. You need to borrow the memory from someone else. Get online.

I grow silently nostalgic and wonder, really, what is it about youth that allowed me to feel so good when I angered so many? And how the fuck is it that I miss that?

(If you are interested in participating in a facilitated support group for gay senior men, contact Cliff Bostock PhD, 404-518-4415, cliffbostock@gmail.com; cliffbostock.com.)

July 24, 2020 Columnist 21

MELISSA CARTER THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID

Reaching the Big ‘L’ in the LGBTQ Market I was asked to be part of a collaborative project with a local PR firm that focuses on the importance of women and their spending power when it comes to advertising. My contribution would incorporate the voices of lesbians within that group through research of studies centered around us. However, I discovered a lack of focus specifically on the lesbian market. In fact, when trying to find studies or articles on the lesbian community alone, the results are scarce.

It made me aware of a potential trend in the LGBTQ community that seems to happen in all groups: the women get left out. Yes, there are plenty of studies on the LGBTQ community as a whole, but as our community grows and the initialisms that describe us lengthen, I’m afraid not as much attention is given to the “L” in our alphabet.

I was a recent guest on the aforementioned PR firm’s podcast, during which I was reminded of this issue when recalling a conversation with a gay male friend years ago: I’m proud of the fact that more letters can be added (to LGBTQ) because our community is giving to each other. But I will say there was a comment made one time by a gay friend of mine back as the AIDS crisis was diminishing. It was what if the lesbians got AIDS and not the gay men, would the gay men have come to their rescue? And the answer was no. More than likely the gay men would not have come. Because what made the gay community really cohesive was the AIDS crisis, and lesbians came to the defense and the help of their male counterparts. Lesbians are the least affected by the AIDS crisis. It was interesting to me because that was the first time I felt a difference when a guy said that.

His comment was, “thank god the men got it and not the women because the women would have been left on their own.”* 22 Columnist July 24, 2020

PHOTO BY SHUTTERSTOCK / JONO ERASMUS

This was not a theory of mine. Again, it was an idea conveyed to me by a gay male who was sure that his assessment was accurate.

Even as lesbians buck the traditional stereotypes of women as meek and unable to stand up or do for themselves, they still seem to fade into the background within our community. People are excited to have their Gay Best Friend, yet no one is giving the same effort or bragging rights to having a lesbian in their circle.

I am proud of the accomplishments of Atlanta’s LGBTQ community, and of the potential it has to lead the country with such an impressive collection of residents.

It is a great feat to organize and manage voices from such different walks of life and experiences. Ours is unique because we gather from different genders, races, economic backgrounds, and identities. Yet, we welcome with open arms everyone who feels disenfranchised and offer shelter to those whose own families turn their backs on them. We are our own family, but as that family grows, I trust the balance will be maintained and no patriarchy forms.

TheGeorgiaVoice.com

RYAN LEE SOMETIMES ‘Y’

The ‘Cancel Culture’ Con A phony pandemic has swept across our country in 2020, one that allegedly can strike anyone at any time, although you couldn’t name more than a handful of actual victims. It’s supposedly a novel malady, but it is a familiar political messaging strategy to make healthy people appear sick.

I’m not talking about COVID-19 (a bona fide plague), but rather “cancel culture,” which is touted as being just as contagious as coronavirus.

After the term “cancel” was invoked to end the careers of R. Kelly for preying on underage girls and comedian Louis C.K. for masturbating in front of female colleagues, we’re now told liberals seek to “cancel” anyone who makes an honest mistake or uses a bad pun.

“Cancel culture has tried to remove every one of us from this show for one reason or another,” Meghan McCain said on a recent episode of “The View,” “and by some miracle, we’re all still here.”

Hallelujah! I must see miracles every goddamn day.

Iliza Shlesinger and Whitney Cummings, two female comedians with a testicular swag to their standup acts, both warned about cancel culture during their monologues while guest-hosting “Jimmy Kimmel Live,” without either noting that neither of the edgy humorists would be appearing on network television if cancel culture were a real thing. During a podcast I was listening to this week, one of the hosts apologized for the delay in new episodes about old school wrestling by saying, “I swear it’s coming, the mothership will be landing soon.”

“There’s a joke in there, but I’d probably get canceled for it,” replied his co-host, who was more afraid of exploiting a double entendre than he was later mocking the “simmering sissified delivery” of one wrestler and describing a women’s tag team match as a “four-way girl abortion.”

For all the fear about cancel culture, it doesn’t appear to have much negative impact TheGeorgiaVoice.com

on one’s finances or future. Kevin Hart was reportedly canceled in 2018 over anti-LGBT tweets and bits — even though he voluntarily walked away from hosting the Oscars, then topped “Forbes’s” list of highest-earning stand-up comedians in 2019.

Sadly, most of the folks I have mentioned thus far are considered progressives, and liberals have proven themselves workhorses for conservatives’ strategic wordplay. In the same way that calls for basic decency were eventually ridiculed as political correctness, the term “cancel culture” has become a shield and a weapon — protecting people from accountability by portraying their critics as tyrannical.

Just as calling someone a racist became more offensive than being a racist, folks who object to tasteless or offensive sentiments have become the thought-police while bigots and bullies are victims or free-speech warriors. Even corporations like Goya are counted among the targets of cancel culture, since “boycott” doesn’t convey the Orwellian impulses of people who do not give money to businesses that disrespect them.

I once risked my career advocating for transgender dignity at my workplace, then a few months later wrote a column about Ann Coulter looking like a drag queen and was labeled transphobic. The accusation stung because I knew my heart and sense of humor, but what I wrote was indeed small-minded and insensitive, and after being called out, I have not repeated that mistake.

Many of us believe that because we are right about one thing, we are right about all tangential regards. Those who try to place too much weight on someone’s shortcomings should remember that none of us are right in every circumstance, and the rest of us should not mistake being corrected for being canceled.

July 24, 2020 Columnist 23