10/22/21, Vol. 12 Issue 15

voice

georgia VOL.12 • ISSUE 15

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BUSINESS

Principal/Publisher: Tim Boyd tboyd@thegavoice.com

EDITORIAL

Editor: Katie Burkholder

kburkholder@thegavoice.com

The Horror of Sexual Miseducation Katie Burkholder

Editorial Contributors: Dyana Bagby, Melissa Carter, Michael Dubin, Jim Farmer, Buck Jones, Sydney Norman, George Shepherd, Fletcher Varnson

PRODUCTION

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Publisher Emeritus: Chris Cash

FINE PRINT

All material in Georgia Voice is protected by federal copyright law and may not be reproduced without the written consent of Georgia Voice. The sexual orientation of advertisers, photographers, writers and cartoonists published herein is neither inferred nor implied. The appearance of names or pictorial representation does not necessarily indicate the sexual orientation of that person or persons. We also do not accept responsibility for claims made by advertisers.

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EDITORIAL

I’ve watched a lot of horror movies. Growing up, my younger sister was obsessed with them, so that meant that every scary movie Netflix had to offer was watched in the Burkholder household — even the horrifically cheesy ones (of which there are many). This instilled in me a nostalgic love for both the adrenaline rush of fear and the charming camp of horror.

With Halloween just around the corner, more and more people are going to be getting their scary movie fix. What’s even more frightening than the videotape from “The Ring,” Pennywise from “It,” or that scene in “Hereditary,” however, are the subliminal sexual themes in horror that fill the gaps in sex education.

“Very often, I need characters to do things which, under the right-thinking circumstances, they would never do,” Clive Barker, the writer of novella, The Hellbound Heart, which the popular film “Hellraiser” was based on, said in a 2000 interview with Stephen Lemons. “They need to walk metaphorically through a door into another world … and you’ve got to get the character to a place where the audience will buy it.

Sexual desire is one great way to do that.”

Because of the connection between horror and the body, the genre reveals the oftenproblematic ways we socially construct gender and sex.

There are multiple common tropes that reveal the objectifying and misogynistic ways we view women: There’s the infamous “Final Girl” trope, where the virginal and chaste woman almost always outlasts her sexually active female friends — a rule explicitly explained by horror movie lover Randy in

1996’s self-aware, “Scream.” There’s the “mother as murderer” trope, where the serial killer who only targets young women does so because his mother is overbearing or abusive (see “Friday the 13th” and “Psycho”), and in films like “Carrie,” the young female protagonist is “cursed” once she gets her period, portraying menstruation as a source of womanly evil. The gratuitous violence characteristic of horror is more often targeted at female victims than male.

This violence, when paired with subliminal sexualization, perpetuates an understanding of sex as violent domination — with women construed as the dominated, not dominant — that is mirrored in mainstream pornography.

Horror tropes aren’t only misogynistic, they’re often homophobic and transphobic, too.

Queer people are often underrepresented, and if they are featured, they’re side characters that get murdered early on — like the gay couple murdered by Pennywise within the first five minutes of “It: Chapter 2.” Or, even worse, they’re villainized and pathologized — like the infamous portrayal of “transsexual” Buffalo Bill in “Silence of the Lambs,” who murders and skins women to make what Clarice calls a “woman suit.”

Now, I’m not saying horror is problematic — like I said, I love horror, including many of the movies I referenced above. Horror isn’t the problem; it’s indicative of the problem.

These tropes offer valuable lessons in how we construct sexuality, identity, and the body — constructions that are born from a wealth of sexual miseducation, particularly in the South.

Chances are you had a less-than-enlightening sex ed experience growing up, especially if you grew up in Georgia. My personal experience was one measly week that put “The Conjuring” to shame: I was shown horrifying photos of sexually transmitted

diseases and told terrifying stories of teenage pregnancies, all with the moral that abstinence is the only way to prevent it. I wasn’t taught about rape or same-sex relationships (outside of pathologizing gay sex as risky sex due to HIV/AIDS).

According to SIECUS, an organization that advances sex education nationwide, this is not an uncommon occurrence in Georgia.

Curriculum in Georgia, while more or less left up to individual school districts, is required to emphasize abstinence until marriage as “an important personal goal” but isn’t required to include instruction on sexual orientation, gender identity or consent. Instruction isn’t even required to be medically accurate! The CDC identifies 20 sexual health topics as critical for young people’s sexual health; only 19 percent of Georgia sex ed courses in grades 6 through 8 and 33 percent of Georgia sex ed courses in grades 9 through 12 taught all 20.

The lack of comprehensive education has consequences; Atlanta has disproportionately high rates of HIV and STDs. More broadly, however, it creates a dearth of sexual knowledge that will be filled elsewhere (because, you know, everyone experiences sexual desire — or lack of desire! — and needs to figure out how to navigate it). That “elsewhere” is typically media like television, news, porn, and movies.

It doesn’t look like Georgia’s sex education is going to be advancing any time soon — legislation around sex ed curriculum that is currently pending includes requirements to include instruction on tampons and make information medically accurate, so there’s still a long way to go. In the meantime, however, there’s a myriad of spooky films that have positive messages (or at least critical commentary) on sex and gender. Some of my favorites include “Raw,” “Gerald’s Game,” “Jennifer’s Body,” and of course, “Rocky Horror Picture Show.”

October 22, 2021 Editorial 3

NEWS BRIEFS

Atlanta United Launches Pride Billboard Campaign Staff reports Atlanta United Launches Pride Billboard Campaign Atlanta United has launched a series of billboard celebrating Pride and Atlanta’s LGBTQ community.

The campaign, which launched October 18, features several billboards across Atlanta bearing a rainbow flag, the words “United and Proud,” and the images of some of Atlanta United’s LGBTQ supporters, including Ryan Keesee.

“It’s very surreal, it’s super cool,” Keesee told Georgia Voice about seeing himself on the billboard.“It means a lot as far as visibility and being able to see the team stand behind the LGBTQ community and make a stance of having the image broadcast around the city. A lot of folks will be able to see that and know the team is with us, so that’s great.”

Atlanta United has been a vocal supporter of Atlanta’s LGBTQ community since before its inaugural season in 2017; the team marched in the 2016 Atlanta Pride parade. Even though Pride was canceled this year and Atlanta United couldn’t participate in the usual festivities, they still wanted to ensure Atlanta’s LGBTQ community felt supported and seen.

“We decided to do something outwardly focused, not particularly focused on our team or Atlanta United but highlighting our supporters and the [LGBTQ] community in general,” Mike Summers, the head of marketing and digital for Atlanta United, told Georgia Voice. “It’s a campaign about being united and proud. Half of our content and messaging is focused on the team and our players, half is supporting the culture 4 New Briefs October 22, 2021

COURTESY IMAGE

of Atlanta. It’s very difficult to support the culture of Atlanta without acknowledging the LGBTQ community, so this was a moment for us to celebrate our supporters, celebrate the community, and celebrate love in general.”

The campaign will run until Monday, October 25.

Atlanta Pride Creates “Living Rainbow” Sidewalk for ELEVATE Weekend, Oct. 28-31 As part of the ELEVATE Atlanta public arts festival, Atlanta Pride will be colorizing 1000 feet of sidewalk as a “Living Rainbow.” The Atlanta Mayor’s Office of Cultural Affairs awarded Atlanta Pride a grant for this project, which will be on display the weekend of October 28-31. This artwork will be free and open to the public but will only be temporarily on display around Rose Circle Park (900 Rose Cir SW) during the scheduled ELEVATE Atlanta weekend of events in the Westside neighborhood. Mark your calendars to come out to see the work, because it will be washed away on November 1.

The material used for this project is an ecofriendly colored powder made of corn starch and other food-safe and cosmetic-grade natural colors. Large blocks of the sidewalk in Rose Circle Park will be colorized using the colors from the Rainbow Pride flag. Over the course of the installation, as people walk over the sidewalks, the colors will blend into a Living Rainbow that keeps on changing the more viewers interact with the work.

Anti-LGBTQ Daily Wire Host Says Two Men Shouldn’t Be Allowed to Adopt Babies Anti-LGBTQ Daily Wire podcast and YouTuber Matt Walsh joined the growing

chorus of far-right and conservative voices outraged that U.S. Secretary of Transportation Pete Buttigieg went on paternity leave from his job in August after he and his husband Chasten had adopted two children.

On his show Monday Walsh not only criticized Buttigieg, but he attacked same-sex couples adopting children altogether.

“It’s absurd for any public employee, paid on taxpayer dime, to be given that much time off. Now, you can make an argument for women on maternity leave but not for men.

Paternity leave is a nice luxury for private companies that can afford it. The U.S. government is not a private company – it’s a public institution, deeply in debt, failing in just about every way and everywhere.

So, this is not a time and not the place for those kinds of luxuries… I also didn’t say that there’s nothing at all for a man to do for his family after a child is born. I said that as far as caring for the newborn himself, most of that is going to be done by the mother.

She, in most cases, will be feeding the child.

The child also needs and wants his mother’s presence, his mother’s touch, her voice. The father should be interacting with the baby also, obviously, but the infant is far more focused on his mother at that age. And needs his mother more. There is no mother in the Buttigieg household, but that doesn’t change the point here. Babies need their mothers, which is why two men shouldn’t be allowed to adopt babies in the first place. And the outrage mob can now start a secondary campaign over that comment. But I’ll say it again. Two men should not be allowed to adopt babies because babies need mothers.

They also need fathers, which is why two women shouldn’t be allowed either.”

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NEWS

Top Atlanta Mayoral Candidates Reveal How They Would Tackle LGBTQ Issues Dyana Bagby

Do you plan on maintaining the LGBTQ Advisory Board that Mayor Keisha Lance Bottoms established? If not, how will you keep informed on the needs of LGBTQ Atlantans?

I would ensure that I am engaging with all parts of the city and with the LGBTQ community specifically. I intend to work with the LGBTQ community to utilize the Advisory Board to its fullest extent. I plan to revitalize and prioritize the City’s Human Relations Commission by providing more autonomy, authority, and funding.

Read the full article online at thegavoice.com.

LGBTQ voters are expected to play a central role in the November 2 election to decide who will be Atlanta’s next mayor to lead the city as it continues to recover from the economic fallout of the Covid-19 pandemic and the racial reckoning demanded by the Black Lives Matter movement.

There are 16 candidates running for mayor in the general election. The Georgia Voice asked the top five mayoral candidates, according to fundraising, to answer LGBTQspecific questions. Those who replied were City Councilmember Andre Dickens, City Council President Felicia Moore and former mayor Kasim Reed. Councilmember Antonio Brown and Sharon Gay, a development attorney, did not respond.

Other mayoral candidates are Kirsten Dunn, Nolan English, Mark Hammad, Kenny Hill, Rebecca King, Walter Reeves, Roosevelt Searles III, Richard Wright, Glenn Wrightson and write-in candidates Brandon Adkins and Henry Anderson.

Early voting is taking place in DeKalb and Fulton counties through Oct. 29. If no candidate receives 50% plus one of the vote, a run-off will be held November 30.

Andre Dickens andreforatlanta.com Dickens was elected in 2013 to the Post 3 at-large seat on the City Council.

What are the key issues that LGBTQ Atlantans are facing that you plan to address if elected? How do you plan to address these issues?

The most significant issue of late has been the failure of the City of Atlanta to appropriately handle the Housing Opportunities for 6 News October 22, 2021

Andre Dickens

PHOTO COURTESY OF CAMPAIGN

Persons with AIDS funds. This summer, I met with the co-chairs of the mayor’s LGBTQ Advisory Committee to understand what has and has not been done on HOPWA so that we can better map a path forward. When I am mayor, I will assign a lawyer from the city’s legal department to the HOPWA Advisory Committee. This person will be tasked with identifying other legal resources that can help do a deep dive into the HOPWA regulations and processes to determine where the bottlenecks are and how to fix them.

In addition, Atlanta is facing an HIV epidemic. It will take a collaborative approach and require us to work together with all stakeholders — health departments, community leaders, non-profits, and service providers. To that end, as mayor, I would hire a Director of HIV Prevention who would collaborate with each of these groups and focus on coordinating our efforts to ensure

easy access to testing, preventive measures (PReP), and continual care for those who are HIV-positive.

As we are dealing with violent crime in Atlanta, we must address the disproportionate rates of violent crime targeted toward the LGBTQ community, especially toward Black trans women. The city is already creating an Office of Violence Prevention, and I will make sure that violence prevention against trans women is included in that work. I will also focus on economic and workforce development initiatives for the LGBTQ community, in particular trans people. Improving economic opportunities and reducing homelessness will help reduce violence by allowing trans people the opportunity to live in safe housing conditions. Finally, I will expand the education mandate of the LGBTQ Advisory Board to help improve educational opportunities for LGBTQ issues throughout the city.

What is your position on the City Council recently approving a cabinet-level post for the Office of Equity, Diversity and Inclusion that includes the first LGBTQ affairs director?

I support this post, and I plan to complete a comprehensive search to find the appropriate individual to fill this position just as I will for similar roles in my administration. I believe that we need to do a better job of ensuring that we have a diverse and inclusive administration especially outside of the diversity and inclusion focused departments.

Felicia Moore feliciamooreformayor.com Moore was elected to the City Council in 1997 before becoming city council president in 2018.

What are the key issues that LGBTQ Atlantans are facing that you plan to address if elected? How do you plan to address these issues?

I believe our LGBTQ neighbors and business owners want the same things everyone else does: to be safe where they live, work, and play; to be free to be who they are without discrimination; to receive the services they pay for; and to have government leaders they can trust, rely upon, and who will be CONTINUES ON PAGE 7 TheGeorgiaVoice.com

NEWS CONTINUED FROM PAGE 6 accountable to them. That said, there are a few additional needs they have, which our city has failed to provide. The first is HOPWA. When elected, I am going to begin restructuring how the city of Atlanta delivers on this program. I want to make sure our city is providing more workforce training and healthcare support to our LGBTQ community members, and that we take extra good care of our unsheltered youth.

Do you plan on maintaining the LGBTQ Advisory Board that Mayor Bottoms renewed?

As our next mayor, I will not only maintain the LGBTQ Advisory board inside the mayor’s office, but I will be meeting with that team more frequently and insisting that other department directors meet with them so that good ideas and service remedies are not left on the table.

What is your position on the City Council recently approving a cabinet-level post for the Office of Equity, Diversity and Inclusion to include LGBTQ affairs?

I think this is a great idea, and I look forward to announcing this position and its duties during my transition period when I’m elected as our next mayor. I am proud to know a few people who would be excellent

candidates for this position, but in the interest of fairness and transparency, I want to open the opportunity for this position and others to community nominations. I believe this is the way to ensure we are not missing hidden talent.

Kasim Reed kasimreed.com Reed served two terms as Atlanta’s 59th mayor from 2010-2018. During his first term, he was forced to face the LGBTQ blowback over the controversial police raid of the Midtown gay bar the Atlanta Eagle. Eventually, the city settled with the patrons of the bar for more than $1 million.

What are the key issues that LGBTQ Atlantans are facing that you plan to address if elected? How do you plan to address these issues?

There are three issues that Reed believes will need to be addressed immediately if elected are: the public safety of our LGBTQ community, specifically Black trans women; addressing our city’s rate of new HIV infections; and getting the city’s HOPWA program back on track.

Former Mayor Reed’s plan to address violent crime in Atlanta includes hiring 750 police officers, implementing training centered on non-violent, community-based policing,

Kasim Reed

PHOTO COURTESY OF CAMPAIGN

keeping the Atlanta City Jail open so that violent offenders remain off the street, and opening all 33 of the city’s Center of Hope recreation centers to keep children safe.

Reed will establish a unit within the Atlanta Police Department dedicated to investigating hate crimes and crimes against the LGBTQ community.

In 2016, the Reed Administration appointed Tracee McDaniel to the Atlanta Citizen Review Board, which provides citizen oversight of alleged police misconduct. Ms. McDaniel was the first transgender member of the Atlanta Citizen Review Board in the city’s history.

Although Atlanta has become the epicenter of the HIV crisis, this is a problem that is solvable with leadership, funding and consistent community education and engagement. Reed’s priority will be to leverage at least $10 million in federal funds from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services Minority HIV/AIDS Fund to support efforts to expand HIV diagnosis, treatment, prevention, and response. Reed is committed to extending the current one-year HIV Executive Fellowship supported through the FUSE Foundation and expanding the reach of that program. Reed also supports extending and expanding the City’s current HIV Executive Fellow position.

Felicia Moore

PHOTO COURTESY OF CAMPAIGN

TheGeorgiaVoice.com

The more than $20 million in federal funding for HOPWA deserves and requires a dedicated program management team.

The city’s approach of having the Office

of Grants Management administer this program as one of many failed during Reed’s second term as mayor and continues to fail the people it is designed to support. If elected, Reed is committed to implementing additional leadership and operational changes to ensure that every dollar is pushed to the non-profits and individuals it is intended to serve. This includes streamlining application requirements to match federal criteria, creating a position that would work with providers directly to aid them with the compliance process and putting all payments to providers on a net 30 payment cycle.

Do you plan on maintaining the LGBTQ Advisory Board that Mayor Bottoms established? If not, how will you keep informed on the needs of LGBTQ Atlantans?

Yes. In 2013, Mayor Reed appointed Robin Shahar as Mayoral Advisor on LGBTQ issues.

We support the expansion of the advisory board and will continue to support its efforts.

What is your position on the City Council recently approving a cabinetlevel post for the Office of Equity, Diversity and Inclusion to include the LGBTQ affairs director?

Yes, Mr. Reed supports the creation of a cabinet-level post for the Office of Equity, Diversity and Inclusion to include LGBTQ affairs. At this time, Mr. Reed does not have a person in mind to fill the position but if elected, the administration would work with the LGBTQ community to identify the best candidate.

October 22, 2021 News 7

NEWS

DisABILITY LINK Fights Workplace Discrimination Against Disabled People Fletcher Varnson

“Sometimes people think of training as teaching people how to dress, but that’s not what it’s about. It’s about helping people to reach their own goals while living independently, whether it’s looking for a job or becoming more social in another organization or starting a workout plan.”

According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics (www.bls.gov/news.release/disabl.t02.htm), only 17.9 percent of people with disabilities were employed in 2020, falling from 19.3 percent in 2019. With October being Disability Employment Awareness Month, examining workplace discrimination against disabled people — especially those in the LGBTQ community — and how it can be improved is as important as ever.

In an interview with Georgia Voice, Executive Director of disABILITY LINK Kim Gibson said COVID-19 is a primary reason why employment discrimination hit people with disabilities particularly hard recently.

“People with disabilities were already disproportionately affected by employment discrimination prior to COVID-19, with people also in the LGBTQ community experiencing further discrimination,” Gibson said. “With COVID-19 and disabled people being at a higher risk of getting COVID-19 and maybe costing companies more money through support and the assumption they will not be able to work — all of that has had a major impact for people with disabilities, and being LGBTQ has also intensified that.”

Nina Colman, the Disability Rights, Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion Independent Living Specialist at disABILITY LINK, shared that the conflict of visibility also plays a major role when it comes to employment discrimination against LGBTQ and disabled people, as many fear disclosing their disability may impact their ability to get a job.

“More LGBTQ people have disabilities than the general population, and both disability and queerness can be visible or invisible and carry different types of stigmas,” Colman said. “One thing that’s hard for anyone with a disability is asking ‘do I disclose?’ Over 78 8 News October 22, 2021

— Executive Director of disABILITY LINK Kim Gibson disABILITY LINK

PHOTO VIA FACEBOOK

percent of people do not disclose.”

This fear of being rejected becomes more pervasive when being LGBTQ with disabilities.

“The same things that are hard for people with disabilities are doubly difficult for queer people with disabilities because of the double stigma or the double invisibility— not being able to share an important part of yourself because the world is changing not fast enough,” Colman said.

To fight against employment discrimination, organizations like disABILITY LINK empower people with disabilities by providing them with skills and information to help live their best lives.

“DisABILITY LINK is run for and by people with disabilities,” Gibson said. “Our primary goal is to provide core services, which includes training people to advocate for themselves and peer groups.”

She emphasized that this training goes beyond independent living.

“Sometimes people think of training as teaching people how to dress, but that’s not what it’s about,” Gibson continued. “It’s about helping people to reach their own goals while living independently, whether it’s looking for a job or becoming more social in another organization or starting a workout plan.”

DisABILITY LINK also provides information to people with disabilities to help them find other organizations and communities specialized to an individual’s wants and needs. “A lot of our programs serve as starters to help individuals find the communities of their choice,” Gibson said.

“So, somebody may start at our wellness gym, and then we will help them find something affordable in their own community.”

DisABILITY LINK helps create some of

these specialized communities in the form of peer groups. Recently, they formed the LGBTQAIP+++ peer group for LGBTQ people with disabilities to share their experiences and support one another.

Gibson emphasized the importance of recognizing the intersection between disability and LGBTQ+ for organizations like disABILITY LINK. “Every part of a person’s being is important,” she said. “Not one part is separated. Many corporations may think they have a diverse population, but you can be as diverse as you want without being inclusive. So, for us, it’s important to include the whole body and the whole person. If we fail to identify the different connections between people, we are failing to do our job as civil rights and social justice leaders.”

To volunteer or find support at disABILITY LINK during Disability Employment Awareness Month, visit DisabilityLink.org.

TheGeorgiaVoice.com

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October 22, 2021 Ads 9

YOUR VOICE

Letter to the Editor Bruce Garner

“Two of the organizations complaining have a financial interest in having Pride take place. There is nothing wrong with that. But I’ve seen at least one of them put their profit motive above preventing the spread of the virus. We should all put some thought into that fact.”

This op-ed was submitted to Georgia Voice in response to an article published in our last issue entitled “Community Calls for Reforms to Atlanta Pride, APC Responds.” The article’s title has since been edited online to “Members of the Community Call for Reforms to Atlanta Pride, APC Responds.”

It is Sunday evening of Pride weekend and I just finished reading the article about the Atlanta Pride Committee (APC). If my memory serves correctly, I marched in my first Pride parade in Atlanta in 1979, not long after my 30th birthday. Yes, that does make me old in the eyes of some, but I am still here.

I have been a Pride supporter in various forms for many years. I’ve also been involved as a Pride sponsor for a decade or so. In that capacity, I have always had a very good experience with the process and the outcome. My perspective in that may be different from most. I have several decades of experiences with national, regional and local non-profits that depend heavily on volunteers, so I know what that entails.

I was struck by several points in the article, many of which need better contextualization if they are to have any validity.

COVID-19 has had a profound impact on all our lives. If we don’t grasp that concept, we have been living in a cave for 18-plus months. It’s helpful to remember where we are geographically as well. Less than half of our state’s population is fully vaccinated against the virus. (Yes, I realize the numbers are higher in Atlanta and probably more so in the queer community.) However, the comparison between Music Midtown and Pride is not a valid comparison. Music Midtown limits access and limits the number of tickets sold and required proof of vaccination. Pride events are literally wide open to anyone and there are no restrictions 10 Your Voice October 22, 2021

important aspect of which was that it is always the issue that is debated and never the person who presented it. Personalities should never be involved. I wonder if some of those wanting changes might be hung up on that factor. That is not to say that there are no changes needed, but the organization is the entity to determine that.

Atlanta Pride

FILE PHOTO

as to who can attend nor is there a legitimate way to check for vaccination status.

As an observation, I live a few blocks from X Midtown. Prior to the availability of vaccinations, when we should have been social distancing, wearing masks and taking precautions, I lost count of the number of times I walked past X Midtown and saw few masks, little social distancing or any evidence of true precautions against the spread of COVID. I wonder how much the profit motive figured into their complaints.

A headline that literally screams “ Community Calls for Reforms” is very misleading when the community in question seems to be about two dozen people. It’s hyperbole at best and misleading at worst. We are a “community” of several hundred thousand people, so let’s be more honest with headlines.

The APC is following standard transparency guidelines with open board meetings,

readily available records, etc. to meet those guidelines. I haven’t seen anything that indicates a failure to disclose what the law requires. Contrary to popular myth, the “general public” is not entitled to know all the internal details of the workings of a nonprofit organization.

A self-perpetuating board would not be unique to APC. I can think of few non-profits, both queer and non-queer, that don’t recruit and select their board members. With the APC so heavily reliant on volunteers to get the work done, I doubt they can afford to have board members who cannot or will not put in the extensive volunteer hours Pride requires to be successful. I never saw this board as a “face value” board. It’s a fully working board unless I have missed something.

A decade or more ago I met with the then “dysfunctional board” of APC. I presented a workshop on the basics of how meetings are run and how decisions are made, one

I’ve rattled on for too long, but I do feel the need to address what I see as a conflict of interest. Two of the organizations complaining have a financial interest in having Pride take place. There is nothing wrong with that. But I’ve seen at least one of them put their profit motive above preventing the spread of the virus. We should all put some thought into that fact.

We will get through this pandemic. We will get back to our normal ways of interacting, both healthy and unhealthy. Attacking one of our institutions for putting our welfare above profit and a good time is not the way to go. I’ve had my third shot now. I still wear a mask in public, because I learned the hard way not to trust folks to do the “right” thing in a state where the Governor puts politics above science and medicine. If you haven’t gotten vaccinated, shut up and sit down. Your rights end where and when they compromise my health.

So, can we avoid the hyperbolic headlines that mislead in a time when we need all the accuracy we can get? Please?

TheGeorgiaVoice.com

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October 22, 2021 Ads 11

YOUR VOICE

Emory Should Stop Supporting Glenn Church’s Homophobic Discrimination George Shepherd

our congregation, regardless of … sexual orientation, [or] gender identity.” Likewise, Glenn recently offered a “Pride Prayer Service” and regularly plasters itself with rainbow Pride flags.

Read the full article online at thegavoice.com.

With one major exception, Emory University has fought diligently to fulfill its Nondiscrimination Statement, which provides that “Emory cannot and will not tolerate discrimination against … any individual or group based upon … sexual orientation.” That exception is Emory’s Glenn Memorial Church, which discriminates against LGBTQ people by refusing to hire openly gay clergy and by prohibiting its clergy from marrying samesex couples. Long a Glenn member, I tried for years to convince Glenn to abandon its bigotry. After its leadership repeatedly refused, I resigned in protest.

Glenn’s discrimination is a stain on Emory because the university is inextricably intertwined with Glenn. First, Emory permits Glenn to occupy two of Emory’s iconic buildings: the Glenn sanctuary and the education building. Looming over the gate to the university, the Glenn sanctuary is Emory’s face. The backgrounds of countless photos of gowned graduates posing atop the marble Emory sign next to the entry gate include the Glenn sanctuary’s columns and steeple. For many in the community, the Glenn buildings are Emory.

Second, Emory provides lavish support for Glenn — support that is far more substantial than them allowing other religious groups to share Emory’s small Cannon Chapel. Emory provides Glenn with the sole occupancy of two of Emory’s signature buildings rent-free.

In addition, Emory pays for the sanctuary building’s maintenance. The maintenance expenses for this large, aging building 14 Your Voice October 22, 2021

In 1974, the United Methodist Church, of which Glenn is a member, established homophobic policies in its Book of Discipline, which both barred its pastors from officiating same-sex marriages and prohibited its churches from hiring pastors or associate pastors who were openly gay. As indicated on the UMC’s website, “Pastors may not be ‘selfavowed, practicing homosexuals’ and may not conduct ceremonies that celebrate same-sex weddings or unions.”

Emory University

PHOTO BY GEORGE SHEPHERD

have been substantial, including recent renovations of the roof and interior. The subsidy of free rent and free maintenance likely has a combined annual value of more than $1 million.

I, along with Nathan Hartman, an Emory alumnus who also left Glenn in protest, pointed out Glenn’s discrimination to Emory.

I was delighted that Emory’s representative, Dean Jan Love of Emory’s Theology School, responded that Emory, in line with its Nondiscrimination Statement, would not tolerate homophobic discrimination.

However, she declined to act against Glenn because Glenn’s leadership had misled her into concluding that Glenn did not discriminate.

Glenn’s central statement of purpose, which since 2014 has appeared both on its website and in the printed program that congregants receive at all services, falsely promises that Glenn will not discriminate: “We welcome all persons into the full life and ministry of

For the last 48 years, Glenn Church has chosen to enforce these policies completely and to the letter. Glenn’s pastors have chosen never to officiate a same-sex wedding, and despite having a staff of five or so pastors, Glenn has chosen never to hire an openly gay pastor.

It is no excuse that the UMC rules ask Glenn to be homophobic. Glenn has continued to enforce the UMC’s bigoted policies, even as other Methodist churches across the country and state, like St. Mark UMC and Asbury Memorial, have stood up against these policies to allow LGBTQ equality and inclusion.

Since 2019, I repeatedly petitioned Glenn’s leadership, including Senior Pastor Mark Westmoreland, to join other UMC churches in engaging in civil disobedience against these offensive policies. Every time, I was met with a firm refusal to end the discrimination. The senior pastor has made clear, both in private conversations and in communications that included many church members — both orally and via email — that he is interested in neither disobeying the UMC’s homophobic policies himself nor permitting other associate pastors to disobey them.

“‘Emory cannot and will not tolerate discrimination against … any individual or group based upon … sexual orientation.’

That exception is Emory’s Glenn Memorial Church, which discriminates against LGBTQ people by refusing to hire openly gay clergy and by prohibiting its clergy from marrying same-sex couples.”

More than two years ago, Glenn’s leadership promised to “fight like hell for change from within.” No change has occurred; Glenn is still discriminating. The senior pastor now proposes that Glenn wait for the UMC to change its policies, or for the denomination to split. There is no guarantee that this will happen soon, or at all. Developments in international churches suggest that some hoped-for grand compromise may occur only after many years, if ever.

It is a lapse of Emory’s sterling values both to allow a group that inflicts explicit discrimination to occupy its iconic structures at Emory’s gates, and to support and subsidize the discriminatory group with free rent and maintenance. By subsidizing Glenn and welcoming it, Emory associates itself with Glenn and is complicit in Glenn’s homophobia.

Although I have not yet heard back from Dean Love, I hope and expect that Emory will soon require Glenn to comply with Emory’s admirable nondiscrimination pledge by ending its bigotry. Only then will Emory begin to cleanse itself of the stench of intolerance.

George Shepherd is a Professor of Law at Emory.

TheGeorgiaVoice.com

BUCK JONES THE FRENCH CONNECTION

Invisible History Buck Jones The Pride edition of the Georgia Voice recently ran a couple of interesting stories about LGBTQ history. One of them featured the innovative bike tour offered in Bicycle Tours of Atlanta

by Robyn Elliott, taking the participants around to various sites that make up the rich gay heritage of Atlanta. The other one was by yours truly, giving the reader a look at the fascinating origin story of France’s equivalent of Stonewall.

So much of our present is a result of the pioneers who trod the ground before us, and learning about that history not only pays homage to the struggle and sacrifices these figures made but also gives us perspective on how we too can push for justice and equality in our own spaces today.

Recognizing that there is a distinct paucity in preserving LGBTQ+ history in the Deep South, two intrepid archivists have come to the rescue and begun a miraculous project called The Invisible Histories Project. With the terrific motto of “Unapologetically Southern, unapologetically Queer,” Maigen Sullivan and Joshua Burford have created an organization based in Birmingham, Alabama, to find institutions like libraries and universities that can properly curate the artifacts and memorabilia of gay life in the South.

The Invisible Histories Project

COURTESY PHOTO

perhaps in the vast patchwork of holesin-the-wall and private “social clubs” that dotted the rural Southeast where one might just as easily hear country music or funky R&B blaring from the jukebox. One night Juanita Eskew, a local lesbian and frequent drag king, went with her family to one of the gay bars in Birmingham, Alabama, to perform and receive an award for her popular act. As the audience cheered and got into Juanita’s performance, she reveled in the acclaim and got into the music, doing a hip move that was interpreted by undercover vice cops as an obscene gesture. The cops stepped forward and interrupted the show, arresting Juanita for public indecency.

It’s the late 1970s and disco is playing in every bar and club across the country, except TheGeorgiaVoice.com

Josh’s story has more of a community aspect, which for him is what Southern queerness is all about.

This being the ’70s and the South, Juanita’s momma was there in the audience, and she was having NONE of it. She went onstage to “shoo” away the police, wailing her holy fury onto the two unsuspecting vice cops with the audience cheering her on.

“There is this concept of shame that we as Southerners, and as queers, are supposed to have,” he said. “We’re supposed to be ashamed of being Southern because we might have a thick accent, or because of our rural country ways, and likewise there is the supposed stigma of being queer on top of that … but I think people are missing the point. Queer Southerners are a people with a story of resoluteness, of finding solutions, of surviving and making a go out of life surrounded by our people, our family, in often poor and working class small towns.”

The story ends with a happy ending. The police do indeed haul off both Juanita and her momma and drive around in the paddy wagon

“Southern Queerness is rooted in community, of looking to change people’s perceptions in their own hometowns, with a commitment

But the story doesn’t end there.

I caught up with both Joshua and Maigen recently to find out more about their project, and I was curious if they had any stories they could share with Georgia Voice readers. Maigen is sitting in her office in Birmingham, Alabama, and begins laughing almost as soon as she starts telling the story of Juanita Eskew.

for a while until they finally relent, realize that they probably don’t have much of a case, and release them both without charges. If anything, their case would have been a classic example of Birmingham’s police abuse of power, an image they were hoping to change following the tumult of the previous decades.

to personal interaction that is a form of local activism in its truest form,” he continued.

Joshua provided an example of this sense of community with another story the project discovered from their work. From Starkville, Mississippi at the local university was a photo from the late 1980s or early 1990s. A group of college women were wearing matching T-shirts that said “Lesbian Avengers” on them as a kind of public cry that “we’re here” before Bob the Drag Queen was probably even born. Joshua and his team at IHP began hunting down the women in the photo via social media, and within a day of posting the photo. one of the women in the photo had contacted him and not only provided him the names of everyone in it, but also sent the last remaining “Lesbian Avengers” T-shirt to the archivists for curating.

If you are from the Deep South and have a story to tell or have a treasure trove of old memorabilia from your youth stashed away in the garage somewhere from your first Pride march, flyers from queer activism, paraphernalia from a pageant, or anything else that might be of interest to someone, Maigen and Josh on their website, invisiblehistory.org.

October 22, 2021 Columnist 15

HALLOWEEN

Halloween Happenings Katie Burkholder

Halloween night with the Hideaway Hocus Pocus Party hosted by Calico DeVille and Lisa Car with DJ Rob Reum. First place in the costume contest wins $300.

Spooky season is finally among us! This year, Halloween is in full swing, so make sure you clear your schedule and make room for some of these frightening and fierce festivities.

The Boo Ball: A Queer and Creepy Celebration

Little 5 Points Ghost Tours

Friday, October 29 9pm to 1am Best End Brewing Company

Fridays, Saturdays, and most Thursdays now through November 6 7pm and 9pm

Come get spooky with Music and Friends ATL, Southern Fried Queer Pride, Cryptic Creatives, and other amazing local organizations! Enjoy music from local musicians and DJs, drag and burlesque performances, local vendors, and more. Tickets start at $7 and can be purchased through Eventbrite.

A Little 5 Points Ghost Tour is a fun and spooky way to get into the Halloween spirit and become more familiar with one of Atlanta’s most eclectic neighborhoods. The tour starts at the L5P Center for Arts and Community (1082 Austin Ave. NE) and ends at the Wrecking Bar (292 Moreland Ave. NE) with a total of eight haunted homes and businesses. Tickets are $25. Learn more at l5phalloween.com.

DILF Atlanta “MAKE ME HOWL” Party by Joe Whitaker Presents Friday, October 29 10pm to 3am The Heretic

Hocus Pocus Trivia Night Wednesday, October 27 7pm to 9pm Guac y Margys

Are you a “Hocus Pocus” aficionado? Now’s the time to test your skills! Tickets are $20 and includes your reserved seat, two tacos, and one margarita. Teams from one to six are welcome, 21+ only. Get there by 6:45 to put your team name in! Buy tickets through Eventbrite.

Kaki King’s DATA NOT FOUND Saturday, October 23 8pm Georgia Tech’s Ferst Center for the Arts

Internationally acclaimed composer, guitarist, and Atlanta native Kaki King returns home for a one-night-only multi-media performance at Georgia Tech. The queer performer has been hailed by Rolling Stone as a “guitar god” and touts accolades including Golden Globe nominee for Best Original Score. Tickets are $25 and can be purchased at arts.gatech.edu.

Shalloween: Double Feature!

With Tenderoni and Charlene Saturday, October 23 10pm to 3am

16 Halloween October 22, 2021

Kick off Halloween weekend with the hottest dudes, daddies, and DILFS in Atlanta, plus music from DJ Alex Ramos, at the biggest Jock Party in the country. Tickets are $15 and can be purchased through Eventbrite.

Lips Atlanta’s Halloween Drag Spooktacular My Sister’s Room (21+)

Bump uglies with Atlanta’s undead and dance until you die! Enjoy a double feature and meet and greet with Charlene from New York City and Tenderoni from Chicago plus performances from Atlanta drag artists Abbey Cadabra, Brigitte Bidet, Canzara SZN, Jarvis Hammer, Saliva Godiva, Taylor ALXNDR, and more! Wear your freakiest drag and most ghastly garb for a chance to win the costume contest – and a fat cash prize! Buy tickets starting at $15 through Eventbrite.com.

Four Days and Nights of Halloween

Thursday, October 28 through

The Haunted Housewives – an LGBTQIA Halloween Party PHOTO BY RUSS BOWEN-YOUNGBLOOD

Sunday, October 31 10pm Thursday-Saturday, 7pm Sunday The Hideaway

The Hideaway is the place to be all Halloweekend with drinks, music, and oodles of costume contests! On Thursday, sing along with DJ Darlene and Calico DeVille at Scareoke. Then comes Fetish Friday with host Demarcus Austin and music by DJ Mister Richard and a $500 prize for best fetish costume. On Saturday, come dressed to the nines for the Hideaway Halloween Ball, hosted by Charmaine Sinclair Dupree with DJ Darlene. The costume contest begins at midnight – first place wins $500! The weekend closes out on

Saturday, October 30 10pm to 2am Plated Lounge

The Real Lesbian Housewives of Atlanta host this elite fright fest with sounds by DJ Adore, hookah, and free entry. They will be accepting donations for Lost-N-Found Youth, a nonprofit dedicated to ending homelessness among LGBTQ youth in Atlanta.

Halloween Drag Spooktacular Sunday, October 31 Lips Atlanta

Join the evil divas of Lips Atlanta for some Spooktacular fun, tricks, treats, and a costume contest, plus dinner and a frightfully entertaining drag show! Make your reservations now by calling 404-315-7711.

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Find Your Way Home!

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October 22, 2021 The Pink Page 17

HALLOWEEN

Create Your Own Last-Minute Halloween!

Sydney Norman

What you need for Luigi: a green shirt, green hat, overalls, brown shoes, and white gloves.

How the hell is it October already? You knew you weren’t going trick-or-treating, and you definitely didn’t count on that last-minute Halloween party invite. Now that you have to maximize the minimal amount of time you have to throw together a costume, we’ve got you covered.

What you need for Mario: a red shirt, red hat, overalls, brown shoes, and white gloves.

If you don’t already have facial hair, grabbing a couple fake mustaches can be a fun touch!

“Squid Game” Guards You’ll certainly be on-trend with this costume idea, and bonus: you’ll already be wearing a mask if you’re going out!

If you’re riding solo this year, here’s a few costumes that will get the job done in no time!

Lil Nas X’s “Montero” Demon This music video caused quite the stir this year, and so will you when you pull up to the function dressed as this demon.

What you need: black wings, horns, a cross chain necklace (bonus: white contacts lenses).

If you can’t find horns, you can easily make your own with tin foil and black tape. Just be careful to avoid taping down any hair!

Drag Queen Divine You may know her from “Hairspray” or one of the many other John Waters films she starred in. If you have the skills to glue down your brows and tease up your hair, you can take some Divine inspiration this Halloween.

What you need: a red dress, a fake gun, dangly earrings, and makeup. (Bonus: A red tutu to attach to the bottom of your dress.)

Jennifer from “Jennifer’s Body” If you feel like channeling your inner demon or your inner bad bitch, this may just be the costume for you.

Lil Nas X’s “Montero” Demon

Phoebe Bridgers This costume is for those enjoying their sad girl spooky season.

high boots with a choker and glovelettes OR a “Daddy’s Little Monster” T-shirt, shorts, and a baseball bat.

What you need: a skeleton-print shirt and pants OR black pants, a black shirt, and a printed set of paper bones to affix to your outfit with fabric glue or pins.

With either option, pink and blue eyeshadow on your pigtails and bright red lipstick really pull the look together!

If you’re half of a dynamic duo this Halloween, here’s some ideas for you!

Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy Since these villains have multiple outfits, it gives you and your partner some wiggle room in finding a costume last minute.

What you need for Harley Quinn: either a red and black crop top, bottoms, and thigh

What you need: a white puffer jacket, a jean skirt, ripped red tights, and fake blood.

18 Halloween October 22, 2021

What you need for Poison Ivy: either a black blazer, white shirt, and green pants OR a green bodysuit, fake leaves to affix to your bodysuit, and a green cape.

With either option, a red wig or red hairspray will really pull the look together!

Mario and Luigi If you and your partner are into mushrooms and fighting bad guys, this is the look for you.

What you need: A red jumpsuit (or just some red shorts!), black boots, black gloves, and a black face mask.

You can either purchase a fencing mask at your local sporting goods store, or you can affix a wire frame to a face mask and stretch black mesh over the front of it.

Paint either a circle, square or triangle on the front of the mask with white paint, and you’re good to go!

Care Bears If you and your friends are big softies, this may be the way to go! Just be sure to practice your care bear stare before you head out.

What you need: different-colored bear ears, T-shirts, white fabric, fabric markers, and shorts.

Draw your bear symbol on a circle of white fabric and affix it to the front of your T-shirt.

Match your shirt color to your bear ears, and you’re good to go! If you have time, you can use a little makeup to add a bear nose and some freckles to your look.

The Rockford Peaches from “A League of Their Own.” This classic film taught us that women can do anything men can do, and that there’s no crying in baseball.

Damian from “Mean Girls” Really short on time? This highly quotable character from cult-classic Mean Girls is instantly recognizable.

What you need: a blue hoodie and sunglasses (bonus: carry a sign that says, “She doesn’t even go here”).

SCREENSHOT PHOTO

Harley Quinn

PUBLICITY PHOTO

What you need: a pink collared shirt, a pink skirt, a red belt, red baseball cap, and kneehigh socks (bonus: carry a baseball bat with you to complete the look!).

TheGeorgiaVoice.com

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October 22, 2021 Ads 19

JIM FARMER ACTING OUT

“Cured” Tells LGBTQ History, “Chicago Party Aunt” Tickles the Funny Bone Jim Farmer

MORE INFO “Cured” is streaming courtesy of PBS through November 9.

When the American Psychiatric Association (APA) decided in 1973 to remove homosexuality from its list of mental illnesses, it was a landmark moment for LGBTQ equality — and one that is still unheralded. Patrick Sammon and Bennett Singer’s documentary on the subject, “Cured,” debuted on PBS’ Independent Lens on October 11, National Coming Out Day. Sammon knew back in 2014 that he wanted to make the film. His friend Charles Francis, head of the Mattachine Society of Washington, D.C., wrote a screenplay about Frank Kameny — one of the subjects of the film, who started the Mattachine Society — which featured a scene where psychiatrist and activist John E. Fryer had to put on a mask and don an anonymous name to feel free enough to talk to his colleagues at the 1972 annual APA conference. That scene jumped off the page as one that Sammon found compelling enough to make a documentary around.

From there, he recruited his colleague and friend Bennett Singer to co-direct. “From early on, it was clear to us how significant

“Chicago Party Aunt”

PUBLICITY PHOTO

20 Columnist October 22, 2021

“Chicago Party Aunt” is now streaming on Netflix.

“Cured”

PUBLICITY PHOTO

this moment was in LGBTQ history,” Sammon said. “As long as we were classified as mentally ill, then business and government were going to use it as an excuse against us to discriminate. It had to be the first domino to fall after Stonewall and the fight for equality.”

The first thing the filmmakers had to figure out was who was still around from this fight.

Singer and Sammon weren’t sure how many subjects they were going to be able to track down, but they wound up interviewing 12, including some outside activists putting pressure on the APA and people working inside the organization. Among those

interviewed are Kameny, Ron Gold, Dr. Lawrence Hartmann, Rev. Magora Kennedy, Kay Lahusen, and Dr. Charles Silverstein.

The filmmakers were also able to interview Richard Socarides, a gay activist and political commentator who — ironically — is the son of Dr. Charles Socarides, the leading proponent of the view that homosexuality is a curable mental illness.

During the decades leading up to that decision, LGBTQ individuals could be subject to aversion therapy, castration, and lobotomies.

The whole filmmaking process took five years, with the first interview in 2015. Several reasons attributed to the length of time it took, Sammon said, like digging through all the archival footage available and then visiting archival facilities they did not have access to. “Pulling it all together and then editing it into a coherent and compelling story took a long time and of course there’s the financial side, raising money,” he said.

Independent Television Service (ITVS) came aboard with a large chunk of the money, which led to the PBS screening after a successful festival run in 2020.

Sammon thinks it’s vital to have younger

audiences who might not know the story see it. “We feel fortunate that no one told the story previously,” he said. “There was an NPR podcast, ‘This American Life,’ back in 2003 that told the story. It’s so large that more than one telling can be done. Some documentaries have touched on this, but there’s been no deep dive.

During the production, five of the people we interviewed passed away. The urgency was there.

It’s the only time that a film like this about the event can be told in this way with the firsthand recollection of the people who were there. They guide us through the events that unfolded.”

Out actor Rory O’Malley stars in the new Netflix animated series, “Chicago Party Aunt,” in which a young teenager comes to live with his life-of-the-party aunt Diane Dunbrowski. The actor loved the script and found the story funny and outlandish. “At the end of the day, it has so much heart and it’s a love story of an aunt and her nephew Daniel (played by O’Malley),” the actor said. “He’s an 18-year-old gay kid — so sweet and bright — scared to go out into the world, like I was when I was 18. He has decided to take a gap year and forego Stanford and stay with his aunt in Chicago and learn a whole different set of lessons he would not learn from a professor.”

Growing up, O’Malley himself had some aunts — some related to him and some not — he was inspired by, a pack of women who “knew how to relax at Irish pubs on the weekends.”

The actor also played a gay character in the TV series, “American Princess,” and was in the Los Angeles touring version of the musical, “Hamilton.”

TheGeorgiaVoice.com

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October 22, 2021 Restaurant Guide 21

MELISSA CARTER THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID

Finding Content with My Own Movie Club Melissa Carter As far as I’m concerned, we are still in the middle of a pandemic. I know those of us who are vaccinated have some protection against the virus; however, I’m still limiting my activities to mitigate against any exposure. Included on that list of places I’m not yet ready to visit is a movie theater.

When I had my kidney transplant back in 2002, I was under quarantine for a few months in my home following the surgery.

That’s because my immune system was purposely manipulated to test how strong it could be without recognizing the foreign organ in my body and attacking it. In other words, I had no immune system after the procedure, and they slowly built it back up to a safe level for me and my new kidney.

When I was able to go back into the world, one of the places doctors cautioned me about returning to was the movie theater.

The reason is that they are rarely deep cleaned.

My first job was at a movie theater at Shady Brook Mall in Columbia, Tennessee. I worked the concession stand and checked out VHS tapes for rental in the lobby. Thinking back on my time there, it is true that even though the floor may be swept or mopped, I don’t remember any of my colleagues vacuuming or scrubbing the chairs and armrests — ever — unless they did it when I wasn’t there.

Since all the employees were bored teenagers, I doubt that was the case.

This doesn’t mean I’ll never go back to a movie theater; I love movies. I am, however, content with my movie club, an activity my friends and I created when the pandemic began that we anticipate continuing even when this phase of life is finally over. A handful of us connect on Zoom each Thursday to discuss the designated movie we all watched the week 22 Columnist October 22, 2021

PHOTO BY PEXELS.COM / ANDRES AYRTON

prior. We each take turns to pick the films on platforms we all have, like Netflix or Prime, and watching it on our own allows everyone’s schedule to work. It has proven a great way to get to know this diverse group better, since a pattern has emerged of which genre each is particularly interested in.

The latest offering, for instance, is “My Octopus Teacher.” This documentary beautifully illustrates the unexpected friendship between the filmmaker and an octopus he discovers while snorkeling. Also on our latest watched list is I Care A Lot, Snowpiercer, Vertigo and Pride.

We’ve watched horror, fantasy, teen romance and science fiction, among others. Over the course of a year and a half, my movie club has been an opportunity to expand my film palette and learn to see movies as more than just a couple hours of entertainment. It has also proved a valuable mental health tool during a lonely time.

Like I’ve mentioned, I’m excited to get back into a movie theater when the time is right for me. I just hope my group can maintain some remnant of the camaraderie we have established around this medium when life goes back to normal. Otherwise, I will be asking the stranger beside me to grab a coffee afterward so I have someone to analyze the film with.

TheGeorgiaVoice.com

YOUR VOICE

Drama versus Dramatic Michael Dubin, M.A., Counselor at Living Skills Read the full column online at thegavoice.com.

There is drama, and there is being dramatic.

Being dramatic is the act of expressing what feel like big emotions. Drama is elevating the trivial or less significant things or events to an inappropriate level of meaning and significance.

Being dramatic can be fun for both the person being dramatic and the people listening. Think of the people who are great storytellers or writers. They have a way of elevating the mundane into something compelling and interesting. They are often articulate and observant and have a way of using their observations to embellish and enrich the stories that they are telling.

Sometimes, dramatization is a way good way of expressing emotions that feel, at the moment, too big, overwhelming, unbelievable, or wonderful. It can play an important role in understanding. Storytelling, in a sense, can help people see the truth. By dramatizing what outcomes could be, you are painting a picture and telling a story that can be helpful.

Drama is a whole different story.

EVERYTHING rises to the same level of earth-shattering importance. Whether it’s the butcher at the supermarket seemingly ignoring them or their best friend not listening to them completely, everything is a crisis that must be discussed, processed, and resolved before they can move on.

We have all experienced or know someone who has experienced being caught up in some drama of their own making. At my friend Fred’s workplace, people began leaving. Rather than really delving into the reasons people were leaving, Fred chose instead to focus on the drama going on in the management level just above him. He spent hours trying to decipher what this person meant when they said this or that. He spent months worrying and not sleeping over the current or possible next daily crisis, and this focus on other people’s drama distracted him from the fact that the writing on the wall said it was time to leave.

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PHOTO BY SHUTTERSTOCK.COM / CREATISTA

His job was eliminated. He had had several years in which to send out applications, network, and interview, but instead he focused on trying to control the effect that other people’s drama could have on his livelihood.

Why do people get caught up in drama — either their own or that of others? Because something has to give our lives meaning and significance. That is a basic human need.

Who gets to decide what is and is not significant in your life and what the event or problem or happy occasion means to you? You do. There are no right or wrong answers, and you can change your mind at any time. But a clue that you are a drama junkie is if you give everything the same level of life-changing significance and meaning — which is not only untrue, but impossible. Practice assigning meaning — what does this really mean to me? Practice assigning significance — yeah, it happened but is it really significant? Is it really all that important to me? As you do this, you will find that your life gets a lot easier.

Living Skills offers positive psychology counseling, spiritual counseling and life coaching services in Atlanta and online, including for the LGBTQ community.

Sessions available by Skype. Please email us at livingskillsinc@gmail.com or visit www.livingskills.pro. My podcast, “The Problem with Humans” is now available on Apple Podcasts, Buzzsprout, Google Podcast, and Spotify, as well as on my site.

October 22, 2021 Your Voice 23