Empty Closet, April 2012

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number 455 a publication of the gay alliance of the genesee valley april 2012

Partnerships The Gay Alliance appreciates the continuing partnership of businesses within our community who support our mission and vision.

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Day of Silence rally is at Tilt, April 20

By Susan Jordan Every year LGBT and allied youth across the country keep silent all day, and then break the silence, in memory of the youth who have been silenced by hate violence, bullying and homophobic discrimination. This year the Breaking the Silence rally will take place at Tilt, 444 Central Ave., on April 20.

This free event is for youth ages 13-23 only. Tilt is a nightclub but will be totally free of alcohol on Friday, April 20. The rally begins at 4 p.m. and will be followed by a youth performance and then by a performance by Tony Award-winning Levi Kreis (to check out his music, go to www.levikreis.com).

The Day of Silence will end with a youth dance from 5-7 p.m.

GAGV Youth Services Director Jessica Cohen said, “Every year, the Day of Silence holds new meaning for LGBTQ young people. The GAGV youth rally and dance provide a space for (Silence continues page 6)

File photo of one of around 15,000 gay men sent to death camps by the Nazis.

JCC to host exhibit on Nazi persecution of gays dent of national PFLAG, on “How to be a straight ally,” and a performance by the Rochester Gay Men’s Chorus.

The evening will also include a dessert reception. The JCC is located at 1200 Edgewood Ave. Joy Getnick of the JCC told The Empty Closet, “The JCC is honored to host the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum exhibit ‘Nazi Perse-

By Susan Jordan The Jewish Community Center will host an exhibit from The U.S. Holocaust Memorial Museum on “Nazi Persecution of Homosexuals, 1933-1945,” opening in late May. Related events will take place during the eight-week exhibition.

Opening night for the exhibit is May 24, with a talk by Rabbi David Horowitz, presi-

cution of Homosexuals, 19331945’. The exhibit exemplifies the JCC’s commitment to being an inclusive, welcoming agency.

By hosting this exhibit we have been able to partner with a wide array of Rochester area organizations, bound together by our commitment to learning from the legacy of the Holocaust, and to standing up against intolerance and injustice in our own times. While the exhibit looks to the past, our programming looks to the future. We look forward to welcoming the community to not only tour the exhibit, but also to attend one of the many thought-provoking exhibit-related programs.”

The programs to follow the exhibit opening include a panel discussion on “LGBTQ and Religion,” on June 14; a reception and screening of “Gen Silent” (presented by Excellus and sponsored by the Gay Alliance) on June 19; a screening of “Two Spirits” (in partnership with WXXI) on June 21, and a closing night celebration on July 19, with a talk by Alan van Capelle, longtime LGBTQ activist and president and CEO (JCC continues page 3)

WNY transgender groups will meet here on April 28

By Susan Jordan Transgender groups from Syracuse and Buffalo will meet here with the Rochester Trans Group on April 28. This gathering is the first time that WNY transgender groups have formally come together to discuss issues like passage of GENDA, and to establish friendships and closer links among WNY transgender people.

The gathering will take place at the Gay Alliance Youth Center, 875 E. Main St., from 3-5:30 p.m. Other events for the groups are also in the works, but had not been finalized at Empty Closet press time. ( Trans continues page 6)

L-R: Bess Watts, President, Rochester & Finger Lakes Chapter of Pride At Work; Donna Cartwright, National Board Co-President, Pride At Work; Linda Donahue, Cornell University & 2012 True Colors Award Winner; Peggy Shorey, Executive Director of National Pride At Work; Ove Overmyer, Pride At Work/CSEA & 2012 True Colors Award Winner. Photo: Kristina Pace, PAW Membership Coordinator

Pride At Work honors Donahue, Overmyer On March 15, the Rochester & Finger Lakes Chapter of Pride At Work, AFL-CIO hosted their second True Colors Recognition Award Dinner at the Diplomat Banquet Center in Rochester.

More than 150 people attended the dinner. The mission of Pride At Work is to mobilize mutual support between the

organized labor movement and the LGBT community. The local chapter began operations in the fall of 2007.

The evening featured a clever Labor Fashion Show called “Workin’ It!,” written and hosted by Anne Tischer.

Linda Donahue, Labor Educator for Cornell University’s School of Labor & Industrial Relations, a fierce gay rights ally and advocate, and Ove Overmyer, Pride At Work member (PAW continues page 6)

COMMUNITY SAFETY ALERT DANGER IN THE PARKS: Recently a man was photographed by a male who blackmailed him and demanded money.

Be advised: illegal behavior in the parks can result in Blackmail, Violent Attack, Theft or Arrest!

Photo: Jeff Mills

Champion:

See Page 10

Michael Hardy, Jessica Sutta and Carrie Vernon.

Over 70 Pride organizers meet at NERP conference

Photo: Jeff Mills

Friend:

By Casey Sullivan The North East Regional Pride (NERP) Conference on March 10 drew over 70 attendees from 18 North East Prides to the Radisson Inn in Rochester. The three-day conference included various workshops on (NERP continues page 6)

Contents Newsfronts................................... 4 Interview: Rev. Jim Mulcahy goes to UKraine.............................. 7 Making The Scene.....................10 Opinion........................................12 Columnists.................................22 Community ................................25 Entertainment: Kate Clinton......27 Gay Alliance News.....................30 Resources...................................32 Calendar.....................................34 Classifieds..................................34

Proud Publisher of New York State’s Oldest Lgbt Publication

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the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 455 • april 2012

Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley

Perspectives

The Empty Closet is published by the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500 Rochester, New York 14605 © 2011, All rights reserved.

From the Empty Closet Editor Susan Jordan phen Colbert calls the “truthiness” of the Right. If you are a fanatical ideologue (or a fanatical power-seeker), the facts are irrelevant. Only the True Believers’ version of reality is permitted. Right wing “experts” and politicians are free to make up their own “facts” as long as they stick to their politically correct script. (Example: anything Rick “Frothy Mix” Santorum has ever said about LGBT people.) The American Family Association was still viciously defaming and lying about Fluke two weeks after the Limbaugh attack.

“Freedom of speech” means that Limbaugh, Faux News, Santorum and anti-gay groups can lie about gays, women, African Americans, etc., but their targets don’t have the right to respond.

They do, however, have the right to remain silent – and Sandra Fluke said on March 5 that both Limbaugh’s slurs and “apology” were meant to silence her.

Conservatives spend a lot of time complaining about “political correctness.” What a shame that they aren’t free to abuse, stereotype and vilify their “inferiors,” like in the Good Old Days. The Right doesn’t have a p.c. line of their own, of course!

They just define their ugly prejudices as “religious belief” and any disagreement equals “war on Christianity.” The Tea Party Taliban clearly wants theocracy to replace democracy.

Big Government help for the poor, the middleclass, the sick and the elderly is “diabolical.”

But Big Government must interfere with what women can and can’t do with their bodies and with whether gay families can be treated as “real,” and must give corporations environmental waivers and huge tax breaks.

The word “democracy” comes from Greek demos – “the people.” In the world of Super PACs and corporate personhood, the Republican Party supports democracy – for 1% of the people. The other 99% should remember their place and stay in it, if they know what’s good for them. ■

Who put the “mock” in democracy?

We can always depend on the Right to put the “mock” in democracy. People of color, students, elders and anyone who might possibly vote against conservatives will be turned away from the polls in many states this fall if they don’t have the “correct” (expensive) photo I.D. The Congressional panel set up by Republicans to discuss women’s reproductive rights contained no women. They were locked out. Including a young woman who had some information about contraception and women’s health (remember women’s health?).

Sandra Fluke, who has now become nationally known, wanted to talk about her friend who was unable to get the care she needed for ovarian cysts because her employers wouldn’t provide contraception coverage, which can be helpful for certain medical conditions, as well as preventing pregnancy. Although one might think women are as free to have sex as men, there was actually no mention whatsoever in Ms. Fluke’s testimony about wanting contraception so she can have sex all day and be what pill-popping, four-timesmarried, major Viagra user Rush Limbaugh calls a “slut.” (Wonder if his Viagra is covered?)

Half-truths, twisted truths, un-truths and deliberate lies – they’re all part of what Ste-

Many things

Editor-in-Chief: Susan Jordan Staff Reporters: Ove Overmyer Graphic Design: Jim Anderson Staff Photographer: Jim Wilkins

A Message from the Board of Directors: The Board of Directors of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley, Greater Rochester’s lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender service organization, announced on March 26, 2012 that Susan Cowell, Executive Director, has submitted her resignation from the agency. Susan is leaving the GAGV in order to return to work in electoral politics during this important election year.

The Board has established a Transition Team to initiate a broad search for a new Executive Director to fill this critical leadership role, while ensuring that the Gay Alliance continues to provide high quality programs and services and meet its obligations to the community throughout the transition.

The Board appreciates Susan’s service during her tenure as Executive Director as well as in her many previous roles. “Under Susan’s leadership, the GAGV initiated a merger with Rainbow Sage of the Finger Lakes to better serve LGBT seniors, educated the community on marriage equality, and responded to the important issue of bullying and its serious consequences on LGBT youth,” stated John Altieri, Board President. “In addition, and despite decreasing agency support through government funding, Susan’s efforts led to increased corporate sponsorship and private donations to offset these financial challenges and ensure the agency’s continued financial viability. During

2011, the agency began a strategic planning process to move forward and remain current in its response to community needs.”

Susan Cowell stated, “After 35 years of various roles with the Gay Alliance, most recently the last three as Executive Director, my belief has been reinforced that the LGBT community continues to need advocates to influence the political process on their behalf. I look forward to continuing my support to the organization and the community as I hope to return to my roots in electoral politics. It has been an honor to serve the LGBT community and to work with the board, staff, volunteers, donors and supporters of the Gay Alliance.”

The Board of Directors and staff of the Gay Alliance thank Susan for her many years of service and wish her well in all her future endeavors.

Since 1973, the Gay Alliance has served the Greater Rochester/Finger Lakes area, providing direct program services to LGBT individuals in addition to community education, professional LGBT competency training, community safety/anti-violence programming, resource referrals and publication of NYS’s longest-running LGBT newspaper, The Empty Closet.

For more information regarding this leadership transition at the Gay alliance, please contact John Altieri, Board President at president@gayalliance.org. ■

by the numbers...

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The Empty Closet • Youth Program • Rochester Pride Education Program & Speakers Bureau Community Safety Program & Anti-Violence Project InQueery • CampusOUT • Library and Archives Gay Alliance Resource Directory Shoulders to Stand On • Rainbow SAGE • SafeZone The Gay Alliance plays a central role in advocating for the fair and equal treatment of all people, regardless of their sexual orientation, gender identity or gender expression. www.GayAlliance.org

E-mail Membership levels: ❏ $30-99 Advocate ❏ $100-999 Champion ❏ $1,000-4,999 Triangle Club ❏ $5,000+ Stonewall ❏ Enclosed is my check in the amount of _________ (check #______) Please charge my credit card in the amount of: __________ To: ❏ American Express, ❏ Discover, ❏ MasterCard, ❏ Visa Credit card # _____________________________ Exp. Date: _______ ❏ I would be proud to have my donation publicly acknowledged.

Benefits include: a subscription to The Empty Closet mailed to home or work, plus privileges at each level. Phone: 585 244-8640 or mail to: Gay Alliance, 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500, Rochester, New York 14605. Home delivery of the Empty Closet is free with your annual membership in the Gay Alliance.

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to Many people

Advertising policy: The Empty Closet does not print advertisements that contain nude drawings or photographs, nor does it print advertising that states that the person pictured in the ad is for sale, or that you will “get” that particular person if you patronize the establishment advertised. Advertisements that are explicitly racist, sexist, ageist, ableist or homophobic will be refused; advertisements from organizations that are sexist, racist, ageist, ableist or anti-gay will also be refused. All political advertisements must contain information about who placed them and a method of contact. Additionally, The Empty Closet does not print negative or “attack” advertisements, whether they relate to a product or politics and no matter in whose interest the ad is being produced. A negative advertisement is defined as one that focuses upon a rival product, or in the political area, a rival election candidate or party, in order to point out supposed flaws and to persuade the public not to buy it (or vote for him or her). The Empty Closet maintains, within legal boundaries, neutrality regarding products, political candidates and parties. However, “attack” ads that fail to provide undisputable evidence that the information in the ad is true do not further in any way the objectives and policies of the Gay Alliance or The Empty Closet, including the primary tenet that The Empty Closet’s purpose is to inform the Rochester gay community and to provide an impartial forum for ideas.

Submissions: For publication, submit news items, ads, photos, letters, stories, poetry, ads, photographs or art by mail or in person to The Empty Closet office by the 15th of the month.

Design services for non-camera ready ads are available for a fee. (www.emptycloset@ gagv.us) Publication Information: The Empty Closet is published 11 times a year (December and January combined) by The Empty Closet Press for the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley, Inc. Approximately 5000 copies of each issue are distributed during the first week of the month, some by mail in a plain sealed envelope. The publication of the name or photograph of any person or organization in articles is not an indication of the sexual or affectional orientation of that person or the members of that organization. For further information, please write to The Empty Closet, 875 E. Main St., Rochester NY. 14605, call (585) 244-9030 or e-mail emptycloset@gagv.us.

The Empty Closet is the official publication of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley, Inc., as stated in the bylaws of that organization. Its purpose is to inform the Rochester gay community about local and national gay-related news and events; to provide a forum for ideas and creative work from the local gay community; to help promote leadership within the community, and to be a part of a national network of lesbian and gay publications that exchange ideas and seek to educate.

Part of our purpose is to maintain a middle position with respect to the entire community. We must be careful to present all viewpoints in a way that takes into consideration the views of all – women, men, people of color, young and old, and those from various walks of life.

The opinions of columnists, editorial writers and other contributing writers are their own and do not necessarily reflect the collective attitude of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley or The Empty Closet. The Empty Closet shall not be liable for any loss or expense that results from the publication (whether correctly or incorrectly) or omission of an ad. In the event of non-payment, your account may be assigned to a collection agency or an attorney, and will be liable for the charges paid by us to such collection agency or attorney.

Letters to the editor: The opinions of columnists, editorial writers and other contributing writers are their own and do not necessarily reflect the collective attitude of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley or The Empty Closet. We will print letters at the editor’s discretion and on a space available basis. Only one letter by the same writer in a six-month period is allowed. We will not print personal attacks on individuals, nor will we be a forum for ongoing disputes between individuals. We reserve the right to edit for space and clarity. We will print anonymous letters if the name and phone number are provided to the Editor; confidentiality will be respected. Submissions are due by the 15th of the month at: The Empty Closet, 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500, Rochester, NY 14605; e-mail: emptycloset@gagv. us. Online edition of EC available at www. gayalliance.org.

april 2012 • number 455 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

NewsFronts

Photo: ove overmyer

Local and State

EQUALITY & JUSTICE DAY: The Empire State Pride Agenda’s Equality & Justice Day takes place on May 8. It is the largest statewide gathering of LGBT activists and will feature a rally at the Capital building, caucuses, workshops, lobbying visits with legislators, etc. The main theme this year is passage of GENDA! See www.prideagenda.org.

ColorFEST returns to NTID April 6-8 National Technical Institute of the Deaf (NTID) at Rochester Institute of Technology (RIT) will host the fifth annual Deaf LGBT college students conference, better known as ColorFEST 2012, on April 6-8.

Spearheading the event are Stephen Wille and Darci Zook, both attending RIT. In 2008, Kriston Pumphrey had a vision of reaching out to Deaf LGBT college students in an effort to transform students into leaders of tomorrow, which led to the inception of ColorFEST, an annual event alternately hosted by Gallaudet University and NTID and designed to provide Deaf LGBT college students with opportunities to flourish, network, and learn beneficial skills within a college setting.

An estimated 250 Deaf LGBT members, including but not limited to individuals from Gallaudet University in Washington, DC and regions across the nation, are expected to participate in this exciting national event April 6-8. The theme for this year is “Celebrate.”

ColorFest will include an opening ceremony, a gallery filled with artwork by students, educational workshops, an evening social, performing arts and much more. Hearing and straight allies are welcome to attend the ColorFEST 2012.

Further information regarding the event registration, volunteer opportunities or sponsorship can be found at the link: http://www.rit.edu/spectrum.

The ColorFEST 2012 Committee and the entire LGBT community at Rochester Institute of Technology extend an open, warm invitation to the Rochester community to join in the celebration of the fifth anniversary of ColorFEST.

ESL establishes United Way challenge grant To honor the contributions of those who have come before, and inspire Rochester’s emerging leaders to follow in their footsteps, ESL Federal Credit Union’s Charitable Foundation is establishing a $500,000 Bridge to the Future Challenge Grant.

“This contribution, the largest corporate philanthropic gift that ESL’s Charitable Foundation has ever made, will be

used to leverage increased giving during one of the most challenging years in our history,” said Patricia Davis, Director of Community Investment United Way of Greater Rochester, Inc. “Our thanks to our Board Chair, Dave Fiedler and the entire ESL team for this unprecedented gift that will mean so much to the thousands of people it will help. The grant will match new or increased United Way gifts from local companies and leadership-level donors throughout 2012.

“The Bridge to the Future Challenge Grant joins the Constellation Brands Community Fund Challenge that matches any new and increased individual gifts to United Way’s ommunity Fund, up to $100,000.

“This will greatly help us to achieve our recently announced $25.5 million goal for the 2012 campaign. We hope you’ll help us spread the word and encourage your friends, family and colleagues to help us make change throughout our community.”

When giving this year, please remember: the Gay Alliance’s United Way designation number is 1135. The GAGV’s SEFA (NY State Employees Federated Appeal) number is 03-7556. The GAGV’s CFC (Combined Federal Appeal) number is 93910.

PFLAG honors Pastor Jay Bakker as ally PFLAG National will honor Pastor Jay Bakker with the inaugural Straight for Equality in Faith Award, to be presented at the Fourth Annual Straight for Equality Awards Gala on Monday, April 2 at the Marriott Marquis Times Square, NYC. Straight for Equality, a national outreach and education project created by PFLAG National, invites, educates and engages straight allies to advocate for and support gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people.

Jay Bakker has been an outspoken straight ally for a number of years, taking a very public stand on issues such as the importance of providing welcoming communities of faith for LGBT people, and marriage equality. In his book, Fall to Grace: A Revolution of God, Self and Society, Bakker talks about his own family’s “fall from grace,” and how it colored his personal understanding of the need for God to be available to all people. His self-

described “spiritual evolution” to becoming a GLBT-affirming minister was one he played out in the public eye, much to the benefit of others who have wrestled with GLBT acceptance and how it fits into their beliefs.

“Our decision to honor Pastor Jay Bakker this year was a simple one,” said Jody Huckaby, Executive Director of PFLAG National. “We’ve seen faith communities all over the country taking up this dialogue about what it means to support GLBT people, to welcome them, include them, and uplift them. In the Christian community, Pastor Bakker is a leader in these discussions, and we are proud to recognize the incredible work he has been doing — around the country and around the world — to move equality forward in communities of faith.”

“It’s an honor to be awarded for the work I love,” said Rev. Jay Bakker.

To learn more about the 2011 Straight for Equality Awards Gala, visit www. pflag.org/2012gala. Other honorees this year include Entertainment honorees Audra McDonald and Will Swenson, and Workplace honoree KPMG LLP. -/PRNewswire-USNewswire/

Pride is just around the corner: July 6-15 Rochester Pride is produced by the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley and is the agency’s largest fundraising event.

The proceeds support the programs of the Gay Alliance – Youth, Community Safety, Rainbow SAGE, Education and Outreach, The Empty Closet and the Library & Archives. This year the theme is “Pride Power: Superheroes.”

Everything you need to know to participate in all the events and get involved with Rochester Pride can be found at www.rochesterpride.com. The website is updated as events are confirmed. You can also sign up to volunteer, register to be a vendor and be in the parade, and become a sponsor!

Confirmed events include (more are still in process): Flag Raising at City Hall – July 6, 4 – 5 p.m.; Super Sassy in the Southwedge – July 6, immediately following flag raising, 5 p.m. – till; Youth Pride Dance – July 9, youth ages 13 to 23; Kick Off Party to Pride Weekend – July 13, 7 to 10 p.m. at the Holiday Inn Airport: Pride Parade – July 14, 3:30 to 5 p.m. on Park Ave. and Goodman St.; Pride Festival – July 14, 5 to 9:30 p.m. at the Auditorium Parking Lot on College Ave.; Pride Picnic – July 15, 1 to 7 p.m. at Genesee Valley Park.

For questions and comments, please feel free to email us at pride@gayalliance. org. Like Us on Facebook: Rochester Pride (NY). More on page 30.

SAGE Intergenerational Panel talks about allies

By Lora C. Thody Sunday, March 18, marked the ninth year of the Intergenerational Panel event, an event sponsored by Rainbow Sage and the Gay Alliance Youth Group.

This year’s event was held at the First Universalist Church and was themed “The Importance of Allies in our LGBT Lives.” The event was attended by some 30 people, covering all generations.

The MC this year, Susan Macaluso, welcomed the crowd. A member of the Speakers Bureau, Susan came to GAGV to try to find a voice for herself as an advocate and ally. Susan’s activism in support of LGBT issues was the story of someone truly committed to making a difference.

Her story of her family’s history with gay issues and of her continuing search for ways in which she could advocate for others was just the beginning of an excellent program.

What followed were stories of lives highly influenced by straight allies, stories of the importance of allies in times of great stress and stories of allies who went beyond and became true advocates. These were the stories of Lore McSpadden,

3 James Goff, and Kathy Madigan and her partner Julie Carter. They encompassed stories of compassionate family members, church allies, and home-comings, as well as love stories and the heroic battle to find comfort both in one’s own self and loved ones.

The theme of allies and activism colored each story, from Lore McSpadden, whose talk was summed up in her saying “Being an ally is an action,” through Kathy Madigan who felt that she and her partner demonstrated, early in the movement, to a number of people in their circles who have since become allies, that “you could be both gay and a good person.”

Rounding out the evening was the story of Jamie and Sally Whitbeck, a pair of allies-turned-advocates who found themselves seeking justice and civil rights for friends and strangers alike and who, through twists and turns, helped form and influence what has become the ImageOut film festival. In a fascinating tale told jointly, they wove in aspects of their personal stories with those of LGBT people they had met along the way.

The evening had a number of touches from many years ago, with stories of the “before” times, as well as current issues of today, and touched on many similarities felt across the LGBT community through the generations. As in the past, the Rainbow SAGE event brought those generations together. ■

page one (JCC from page 1) of the Progressive Jewish Alliance and Jewish Funds for Justice. For a complete listing of programs and events, visit jccrochester.org. More detailed program information will follow in the May Empty Closet.

Background “Virulent” is an appropriate word to describe the Nazi hatred of the “unwanted social groups” whom they dehumanized as “bacteria” or “a virus.” These groups included Jews, Roma (“gypsies”), Poles and other Slavs, the disabled, Jehovah’s Witnesses, German socialists and union organizers, and Soviet prisoners of war.

“Non-Aryans” would supposedly “infect” the “Aryan race” with their “inferior” and “contagious” genes.

Homosexuals were also seen as an “infection” that could become an “epidemic,” weakening the macho Aryan male and endangering Germany’s supposed destiny to conquer the world. The Nazis did not seek to eradicate all gay people, as they sought to do with their genocide of Europe’s Jews, but they sought first to “correct” homosexuality and then to isolate the “contagion.”

The pseudo-science of eugenics, or the study of improving human heredity through selective breeding, provided the Nazis with “scientific” grounds for the racial, political and religious biases that Germans and other Europeans had held for centuries. The Nazis capitalized on these ancient hatreds first to get elected and then to persuade the public to accept the intolerance and brutality of what quickly became a fascist dictatorship – the “Thousand-Year Reich.”

First passed in 1871, Germany’s criminal law Paragraph 175 declared “unnatural indecency” between men to be punishable by imprisonment for up to two years. Lesbianism was not mentioned. In the 1920s Weimar Republic, homosexuals began to become more visible and organized, and gay civil rights increasingly found support from liberals and socialists. The right saw homosexuality as an “epidemic” which would “destroy society,” and Nazi politicians began claiming that “such vices will lead to the downfall of the German nation.” Homophobic hatred combined with anti-Semitism when Dr. Magnus Hirschfeld argued that homosexuality was “neither an illness nor a crime.” He was attacked by Nazi media as a homosexual (JCC continues on page 6)

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the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 455 • april 2012

NewsFronts national and international Catholic Church trying to silence victims group?

As part of their defense for priests accused of child molestation, lawyers for the Catholic Church have subpoenaed SNAP, the Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests, demanding to see more than 20 years of their emails even though they are not party to either side in the lawsuits.

A judge in Kansas City ruled that the network must comply because it “almost certainly” had information relevant to the case. The network and its allies say the legal action is part of a campaign by the church to cripple an organization that has been the most visible defender of victims, and a relentless adversary, for more than two decades.

“If there is one group that the higher-ups, the bishops, would like to see silenced,” said Marci A. Hamilton, a law professor at Yeshiva University and an advocate for victims of clergy sex crimes, “it definitely would be SNAP. And that’s what they’re going after. They’re trying to find a way to silence SNAP.”

Denmark may legalize marriage equality by June, PM says News broke March 13 in Denmark that the Prime Minister has promised the legalization of same-sex marriage by June.

An early blog report surfaced on JoeMyGod.com: The Danish Government is ready with the Law Proposal, which will take effect in June 2012. “It is an important step for our society, which recognizes the individual’s differences and the individual’s equality within the society, regardless of who you are, and regardless of who you love,” says PM Thorning-Schmidt. She calls the Law Proposal a completely natural and right step in modern Denmark.

In 1989 Denmark was the world’s first nation to offer federal domestic partnership recognition.

UPDATE: A more formal announcement was soon forthcoming from the Danish press.

Gay couples can look forward to a church wedding this summer. At her weekly press conference (March 13), Prime Minister Helle Thorning-Schmidt said the government is putting the finishing touches to a bill that will come into force on June 15, allowing gay men and lesbians to walk down the aisle in the church of their choice, if they can find

a priest who’s willing to conduct the ceremony.

“It will always be up to the individual priest as to whether he or she is prepared to bless gay couples but this legislation provides homosexuals with the same rights as heterosexuals,” said the PM.

Four arrested in brutal attack on Chilean man Four suspects in the brutal attack on a Chilean gay man, Daniel Zamudio, have been arrested, Chilean news outlets are reporting. Zamudio, 24, was burned, had his ear sliced, and was branded with a swastika by his attackers. He was in a coma for days.

Writes Michael Lavers at EDGE: Prosecutors maintain that Raúl Alfonso López Fuentes, 25, Alejandro Axel Angulo Tapia, 26, Patricio Iván Ahumada Garay, 25, and Fabián Alexis Mora Mora, 19, brutally attacked Daniel Zamudio, 24, in Parque San Borja on March 6. The suspects allegedly struck Zamudio with bottles, rocks and other blunt objects before they cut off part of his ear, carved swastikas into his chest and burned other parts of his body with cigarettes.

El Movimiento de Integración y Liberación Homosexual (Movilh) and various Chilean newspapers have reported that López, Angulo, Ahumada and Mora called themselves “nazis del Centro” or “the Downtown Nazis.”

Movilh spokesperson Rolando Jiménez told El Mercurio after police arrested the four suspects that they confessed to the crime. “We are happy,” said Jiménez.

“When the authorities told me (about the arrests) I immediately called Daniel’s family.”

Zamudio has reportedly regained consciousness, according to Movilh.

Read more: http://www.towleroad. com/2012/03/four-arrested-in-brutalbeating-branding-of-gay-chilean-man. html#ixzz1ovcYp1tr

Ky. Republicans say gay kids should be bullied Republicans in the Kentucky House Education Committee on March 13 squashed an anti-bullying bill because it is “about gay rights” and would help prevent gay children from killing themselves.

The vote came after parents and friends of teenagers who killed themselves to end incessant school bullying told lawmakers about the need for stronger protections for all students. Several lawmakers

on the panel contended that existing antibullying laws are sufficient.

Rep. Ben Waide, R-Madisonville, said House Bill 336 was an attempt “to achieve equality by making some people more equal than others.” He said the measure was not about bullying, but “about gay rights in our schools.”

“Not even sobbing pleas from the parents of dead children can move these monsters,” commented JoeMyGod.com.

March poll shows marriage gaining support nationwide NBC News/Wall Street Journal on March 5 released a national survey on marriage equality that reflects the ongoing change in public opinion on the issue -- across a number of demographics, including party affiliation, age, and ethnicity.

“Today’s poll is yet another sign of where the country is moving -- and moving at lightning speed,” said Human Rights Campaign President Joe Solmonese. “We’ve seen significant jumps in a number of respected polls over the past few years, confirming it’s a question of when, not if, we achieve full marriage equality.”

The NBC/WSJ survey showed marriage equality has strong majority backing among Democrats (up 12 points from 2009) and a plurality of Independents (up 9 points). There was a large increase in support among African Americans – 32 percent favored in 2009 to 50 percent now. And a majority in both the 18-34 and 50-64 age brackets favor marriage for gay and lesbian couples.

Overall, 49 percent of Americans support committed, loving gay and lesbian couples getting married, according to the poll, with 40 percent opposed. In 2009, support for marriage equality was at only 41 percent, with 49 percent opposed.

Other recent national polls, including from CNN, Gallup and AP, register majority support for the issue.

The poll was conducted February 29-March 3, 2012, of 800 adults, including 200 cell phone-only respondents which included GOP primary voters.

Marriage citizen initiative goes to Maine voters in November A citizen initiative to legalize samesex marriage in Maine is headed for the November ballot, the Kennebec Journal reports.

The Maine House of Representatives unanimously voted on March 13 to indefinitely postpone the bill, which has the effect of sending it directly to voters.

House Speaker Robert Nutting, R-Oakland, recognized Minority Leader Emily Cain, D-Orono, to make the motion.

Cain is a supporter of marriage equality.

“We just think this should be decided by the voters,” said Cain’s spokeswoman

Jodi Quintero. “We would like to see this citizen initiative succeed.”

The action by the House avoids a public hearing and a recorded vote by lawmakers. In 2009, the Legislature, which was then controlled by Democrats, held a daylong hearing at the Augusta Civic Center where hundreds of people testified on both sides of the issue.

A recent poll from PPP shows that Maine voters are likely to approve it: “It looks like Maine voters will reverse their 2009 decision and legalize gay marriage in the state this fall. 54 percent think that gay marriage should be legal, compared to only 41 percent who think it should be illegal. And when we asked about the issue using the exact language voters will see on the ballot this fall, they say they’re inclined to support the referendum by a 47-32 margin.

“There’s some indication that the exact ballot language is confusing people a little at this point. Only 67 percent of those who support gay marriage in general say they’ll vote yes while 12 percent say they’ll not and 21 percent are not sure.

At the same time just 60 percent of those who oppose gay marriage generally say they’ll vote against the proposed referendum, while 24 percent say they’ll vote for it and 16 percent are not sure. My guess is at the end of the day voters will see this as a straight referendum on gay marriage regardless of what the language on the ballot says and the 54/41 number bodes well for pro-equality voters.

“Republicans’ opinions are pretty much the same as they were in 2009. But Democrats’ support for gay marriage has increased slightly, from 71 percent to 78 percent. And more importantly independents have gone from voting against gay marriage 52/46 three years ago to now supporting it by a 57/36 margin.”

Read more: http://www.towleroad. com/#ixzz1p18QoeFV

Priest denies lesbian communion at mother’s funeral; placed on leave The Archdiocese of Washington has placed Father Marcel Guarnizo on administrative leave over his actions toward Barbara Johnson, a lesbian who says she was “humiliated” at the funeral of her mother, the Washington Blade reports.

Guarnizo refused to give Johnson communion because she lives with a woman.

During Johnson’s eulogy, Guarnizo reportedly walked out, and refused to accompany the casket to the burial.

The Blade says Bishop Barry C. Knestout, chief of staff to Cardinal Donald Wuerl, told all of the Archdiocese’s priests that Guarnizo was under investigation for “intimidating behavior”: ...“I write to inform you that effective today, Father Marcel Guarnizo’s assignment at St. John Neumann Parish is withdrawn and he has been placed on administrative leave with his priestly faculties removed until such time as an inquiry into his actions at the parish is

april 2012 • number 455 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet completed,” Bishop Knestout said in his March 9 letter.

“This action was taken after I received credible allegations that Father Guarnizo has engaged in intimidating behavior toward parish staff and others that is incompatible with proper priestly ministry,” he said in the letter. “Given the grave nature of these allegations, and in light of the confusion in the parish and the concerns expressed by parishioners, Father Guarnizo is prohibited from exercising any priestly ministry in the Archdiocese of Washington until all matters can be appropriately resolved, with the hope that he might return to priestly ministry.”

Read more: http://www.towleroad. com/#ixzz1ovbt58mA From joemygod.com: The archdiocese on March 11 confirmed Guarnizo’s removal, and noted that Knestout’s letter was read at all Masses this weekend at St. John Neumann.

Barbara Johnson claims that when she approached the altar, Rev. Guarnizo covered the bread and said, “Because you live with a woman, and in the eyes of the church, that is a sin.” The Archdiocese has issued Johnson an apology.

SPLC calls out NARTH for “anti-gay junk science” and lies The Southern Poverty Law Center has issued an in-depth examination of the National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuality (NARTH), which the SPLC calls “the main source for anti-gay junk science.”

An excerpt: The LGBT community is overwhelmingly the group most targeted in violent hate crimes, according to an Intelligence Report analysis of 14 years of federal hate crime data. Gay men, lesbians, bisexuals and transgender people are more than twice as likely to be attacked in a violent hate crime as Jews or blacks; more than

four times as likely as Muslims; and 14 times as likely as Latinos. Despite this hate-inspired violence, anti-gay groups continue to employ virulent rhetoric that demonizes gay men and lesbians, some of it based on NARTH’s research.

This strategy of using science, however flawed, to fortify their religious condemnation of homosexuality was articulated five years ago by the Family Research Institute’s Paul Cameron, a psychologist whose research has been thoroughly discredited by mainstream scientists. “We can no longer rely — as almost all profamily organizations do today — on gleaning scientific ‘bits’ from those in liberal academia. ... [W]e must subvert the academy by doing original, honest research ourselves,” Cameron wrote.

JoeMyGod.com commented, “Original, maybe. But honest? NARTH’s many critics argue otherwise.”

SPLC: Hate groups, militias are on the rise The Southern Poverty Law Center issued a report in March showing that extremist groups are at record levels. The report also adds 11 groups to the organization’s list of designated anti-gay hate groups.

Those groups are United Families International, Save California, Sons of Thundr (Faith Baptist Church), You Can Run, But You Cannot Hide, Parents Action League, Jewish Political Action Committee, Mission: America, Windsor Hills Baptist Church, True Light Pentecost Church, Tom Brown Ministries, and Public Advocate of the United States.

The SPLC report details the growth of hate groups to a record 1,018 in 2011, up from 1,002 the year before and the latest in a series of increases going back more than a decade. But the dramatic growth came in the Patriot movement, which is composed of armed militias and other conspiracy-minded organizations that see

the federal government as their primary enemy. These groups saw their numbers skyrocket for the third straight year in 2011, this time by 55 percent -- from 824 in 2010 to 1,274 groups last year. In 2008, just before the Patriot movement took off, there were 149 Patriot groups, a number that metastasized to 512 in 2009.

In all, Patriot groups have increased by 755 percent during the first three years of the Obama administration. Their number has now surpassed -- by more than 400 groups -- the previous all-time high set in 1996, when the first wave of the militia movement peaked shortly after the Oklahoma City bombing that left 168 people dead.

The hate groups listed in this report include neo-Nazis, white nationalists, neoConfederates, racist skinheads, Klansmen and black separatists. Other hate groups on the list target LGBT people, Muslims or immigrants, and some specialize in producing racist music or propaganda denying the Holocaust.

Read more: http://www.towleroad. com/#ixzz1oYdiu23w Truth Wins Out statement Truth Wins Out applauded the Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC) on March 8 for releasing the expanded list of antigay hate groups.

“We commend the Southern Poverty Law Center for so vigilantly monitoring anti-LGBT hate in America,” said TWO Executive Director Wayne Besen.

“Truth Wins Out also congratulates the 11 extremist organizations newly added to the list of officially-certified hate groups, because we know all too well how hard each of them has worked to earn this dubious designation.”

The latest edition of the SPLC’s Intelligence Report also contains an authoritative article detailing the hate and misinformation coming from the National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuality (NARTH), an “ex-gay” junk science group. This group is headed by radical extremist Joseph Nicolosi,

5 whose theories on sexual orientation are so bizarre that he actually believes Bozo the Clown can turn people gay.

NARTH has become the primary source for the faulty research and scientific distortions used by the religious right to justify their continued opposition to LGBT equality at a time when public opinion is swinging dramatically in the other direction. TWO’s Besen told the SPLC’s Ryan Lenz, “There’s no other play in the playbook except going back to the fire and brimstone.”

The inclusion of Bradlee Dean’s You Can Run, But You Cannot Hide International as an anti-LGBT hate group is notable because of the close ties between Dean, his organization, and Minnesota congresswoman Michele Bachmann.

Before Dean dumped the notoriously anti-gay former presidential candidate for allegedly “going to the left,” she famously prayed for Dean’s traveling youth ministry to “multiply ten-fold,” helped the group raise funds, and made a guest appearance on Dean’s television show. Both Dean and Bachmann -- whose husband’s Christian counseling clinic was busted for offering “pray away the gay” therapy last year by a Truth Wins Out hidden-camera investigation -- are outspoken supporters of a proposed amendment that would write marriage discrimination into the Minnesota state constitution.

“Minnesotans should take special note of the SPLC’s newly-expanded list,” said John Becker, TWO’s Director of Communications and Development, who went undercover at Bachmann & Associates last year. “Virulently anti-LGBT extremist groups like the one led by Bradlee Dean will never be satisfied with simply excluding loving same-sex couples from marriage. These hate groups won’t stop until LGBT people are beaten back into second-class status in every aspect of society.”

So-called “ex-gay” organizations have been at the forefront of the push for mar(Hate continues page 11)

6 (JCC continued from page 3) and also as a Jew. As the new Nazi regime consolidated power, they closed gay bars and clubs, unleashed anti-gay propaganda linking homosexuality to treason, and rewrote criminal law Paragraph 175, which gradually through court interpretation expanded the definition of “indecencies between men” to include any interaction that could be deemed to have sexual content.

Enforcement came under the control of the Gestapo. “Enemies of the state” could be seized and detained in prison, and later in concentration camps, without legal recourse.

Lesbians were not systematically persecuted by the Nazis, since women’s limited social role under patriarchal Nazism meant that lesbians had less “corrupting influence” than the more powerful males.

But lesbians could be sent to concentration camps as “antisocial” because they were refusing women’s only role in Nazi society – producing Aryan children. The national police registry for sexual matters that hindered population growth was the “Reich Central Office for Combating Homosexuality and Abortion.”

Some gay men were put to forced labor, or drafted into the army. Soldiers convicted of “indecency” were sentenced to prison, and then usually forced to return to the military. An alternative to prison and abuse by guards was service

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 455 • april 2012 in “cannon-fodder” penalty battalions, which were used in suicide missions.

Once the war had begun, gay men who were believed to have “seduced more than one partner” were sent to concentration camps upon their release from prison.

They were then subjected to “extermination through work” – assigned to hard labor in dangerous conditions, often with fatal consequences (if the prisoners didn’t die from starvation or the diseases that swept the camps). After 1942, camp inmates were often castrated to suppress their “degenerate sex drive.” Some were used in deadly medical experiments to “correct” homosexuality.

The exhibit from the U.S. Holocaust Memorial Museum includes police file photos of the 100,000 men arrested on violations of Paragraph 175 (around 50,000 were convicted) and Gestapo surveillance photos of gay bars, of bookburnings, and of the ransacking of Dr. Hirschfeld’s Institute for Social Science, Berlin’s most visible symbol of the homosexual rights movement. Another hideous relic is a poster showing the badges that camp inmates were forced to wear, including the infamous pink triangle.

“The Gay Alliance is pleased to be one of the community partners working with the Rochester JCC to present this exhibit and related programming,” said Education and Outreach Director Scott Fearing. ■

Rudolf Brazda, believed to be the last known gay survivor of the Holocaust, died last summer at the age of 98 in Germany.

Brazda was sent to the Nazis’ Buchenwald concentration camp in August 1942 and held there until its liberation by U.S. forces in 1945.

Nazi Germany declared homosexuality an aberration that threatened the German race, and convicted some 50,000 homosexuals as criminals.

An estimated 10,000 to 15,000 gay men were deported to concentration camps, where few survived.

When a memorial to the Nazis’ gay victims was unveiled in Berlin in 2008, the LSVD said the last exprisoner that it knew of had died three years earlier. But the group said it was then contacted by Brazda, who visited the memorial at its invitation and became an honorary member.

Brazda was born in 1913. He grew up in the eastern German town of Meuselwitz and repeatedly ran into trouble with Nazi authorities over his homosexuality before being sent to Buchenwald.

In 2011 Brazda was named a knight in France’s Legion of Honor. ■

Solidarity by Richard Grune

Last gay Holocaust survivor passed in 2011 at 98

(Silence continued from page 1) students to come together, speak out for what they believe in, and celebrate their strength and identities. Ten years ago, the Day of Silence may have brought energy to students’ struggles to establish GayStraight Alliance Clubs in their schools.

This year, the Day of Silence may be a celebration of New York’s equal marriage law, or the continued struggle of transgender students to find safety and support in their school communities.” ■ (PAW from page 1) and staff reporter for The Empty Closet, received the 2012 True Colors Award for their outstanding commitment to the advancement of workplace democracy. ■ (NERP from page 1) how to increase the recognition and effectiveness of regional Prides. There was also a community dinner, show and dance (see page 10).

The keynote speaker, NYS Assemblyman Harry Bronson, reminded attendees about the importance of Pride organizers discussing their ideas openly. Bronson emphasized that the LGBT community needs to educate heterosexual society “to not only be respectful of us but also to grow to love us as a community, as we love them as part of the larger community.”

Organizer Michael Hardy told The Empty Closet that he chose Assemblyman Bronson as the keynote speaker because “His depiction of the triumphs, tribulations and timeline on both the no and yes votes on equality of marriage was a timely and informative presentation, as most people in the room were from states which are going through their own battles and trial now.”

Jennifer Stevens, 31, attended the conference representing Rhode Island Pride.

She admitted to not having much experience with PR, but after attending the PR 201 workshop, she left feeling much more confident. She discussed some of the issues that Rhode Island Pride is facing, such as being a smaller Pride located between New York and Boston. However, she found many small Prides that she did not know existed and learned a lot through them.

“The networking is really great; you learn as much from sitting next to somebody at lunch as from being in a workshop. A lot of great people are here from a lot of great organizations,” she said.

Never having attended a NERP conference before, she wasn’t sure what to expect, but she was very pleased with everybody’s openness at communicating and sharing ideas. “We’re not competing, you know, I think everybody here feels like we’re part of this one movement to make sure the gay community is visible, is equal and so I’m enjoying it.”

Kate Monteiro, 48, also representing Rhode Island Pride, said her favorite workshops were on communication and

public relations. She learned how to speak in a way to attract people not readily associated with the LGBT community, and how to get our stories published in the mainstream press. Rhode Island Pride is holding its 36th annual pride festival and parade this year.

With the attendance almost equal to last year’s conference in Pittsburgh, Michael Hardy deemed the gathering a success. A highlight was the round table discussions or “Triages,” as they allowed people to easily exchange ideas.

He believes they will be a feature of conferences in the future.

Harry Bronson emphasized that, as the New York State LGBT community, we cannot let up on our efforts for equality and must continue to work hard so that “we can have nondiscrimination for our transgender folks and sexual identity and sexual expression.”

The continuing efforts of NERP and its parent organization InterPride are essential for sharing and communicating ideas among Pride organizers, so they can get the LBGT movement’s message across in new and innovative ways. ■ (Trans continued from page 1) Patti Jones, from Buffalo’s Spectrum Transgender Support of WNY, told The Empty Closet, “My understanding of this meeting of the Transgender support groups is that the Gay Alliance, in conjunction with the Rochester Trans Group, has graciously offered to hold and coordinate a meeting with other transgender support groups in the surrounding area, including Buffalo and Syracuse, on April 28, in an effort to network and exchange ideas.

“I think bringing people together from the various groups is a wonderful idea. It will help strengthen our community and provide much needed support. My hope is that this meeting will foster new working connections and friendships between the groups. We are all doing similar work, providing support as well as raising awareness and understanding of transgender issues, so why not compare notes, supporting each other, when we can. The meeting will also come at a very opportune time to rally our community for Transgender Equality & Justice Day in Albany on May 8, when we will lobby our legislators to support Transgender civil rights and pass GENDA. “I have sent out some emails to the Transgeneration Group and the Buffalo Belles, in an effort to get others on board and hopefully willing to make the trip and attend.

“I’m very excited about this meeting and I’m looking forward to attending, socializing, making some new friends, doing a little networking and perhaps having a little fun out on the town afterwards.”

For more information, see www.gayalliance.org. ■

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Interview

Reverend Jim Mulcahy

By Susan Jordan The Reverend Jim Mulcahy is retiring as pastor of Open Arms Metropolitan Community Church, Rochester’s branch of the worldwide LGBT denomination, this month, after nine years as Senior Pastor. His next steps in life will gradually bring him to a new home in Kiev, Ukraine, as he dedicates himself to helping LGBT people in a country where just attending a Pride Parade can result in serious injury.

Rev. Mulcahy was health care chaplain at Park Ridge for seven years before becoming hospice chaplain for the Visiting Nurse Service for 17 years. When he retired he agreed to become pastor at Open Arms for one year.

In 2004 he became Senior Pastor and now, 19 years after that “one year” assignment, he has retired – but he is not planning a quiet life of puttering about as a retired person. He said, “I thought I was retiring, period, but I was asked by the MCC denomination to be church development specialist in Scandinavia and Eastern Europe.”

He continued, “Just as I had no particular interest in pastoring Open Arms at the beginning, I had no particular interest in Eastern Europe. In 2009 I took a working sabbatical for two months to assist a friend in Romania. MCC is in probably 30 countries around the world, but at this time we have no church in Eastern Europe. I went to Belgrade to march in their 2009 Pride Parade, but it was canceled because of violence.

“When I left Romania in 2009, I did not expect to go back to Eastern Europe.

At our 2010 MCC World Conference in Acapulco, my friend from Romania was there, and said, ‘We’re having a conference in Kiev in September and I really need someone to come teach and preach.’”

The conference was for LGBT Christian leaders. Rev. Mulcahy said, “The minute I set foot in Ukraine I felt I was at home. It’s hard to explain. The people were incredible and the conference was a life-changing experience for the people who attended it. They were from Russia, Central Asia, Moldava and other Eastern European countries.

“What made the conference unusual was that in Eastern Europe people don’t pray in other churches. Orthodox churches for the most part don’t permit their members to attend other churches or pray with people of different religions. The conference was wide open and people saw and experienced things they had never seen before – including women reading the scriptures and taking part in the service.

“Also, what I think is really appealing is that, because of Ukraine’s relatively recent entrance into democracy, gay and lesbian activists are all 35 or younger.

They have no generation ahead of them to guide them. The movement there is 25 years behind us. Things we take for granted, like Pride Parades, they can’t imagine – although they do see what happens in Western Europe and they want it for themselves.

“The current president of Ukraine wants to link the country more closely with Russia than with Europe. A Ukrainian group calls itself ‘We Are Europeans’ and they demonstrate in front of Parliament.

But when bills are debated, they are not allowed to testify – although anti-gay religious groups are allowed. Because there is a Ukrainian law on freedom of conscience and religion, gay activist groups are able to be legally recognized by the government. There are 33 gay groups in Ukraine already, and each year there are more. The leaders have an annual secret conference.”

By contrast, gay activists in Russia have been silenced entirely in some areas.

The city of St. Petersburg in Russia has passed legislation banning any form of “promotion of homosexuality,” including parades, marches, publications, etc. Rev. Mulcahy notes that the governor of St. Petersburg province was under extreme pressure to refuse to sign the bill. AllOut. org delivered a petition of 300,000 signatures gathered worldwide in a very short period of time, urging the governor not to sign. But he did.

In May 2011, Rev. Mulcahy addressed the Ukrainian gay group leaders at their conference. He said, “I talked to them about the hate message that comes from certain religious groups. They had never experienced a religious figure saying ‘Don’t let anyone make you feel bad about yourself.’ It’s no big deal to us, but it brought tears there.

“In 2011 I went twice to Ukraine. I spent nine weeks there the first time, and six weeks the second, and I traveled to several cities, meeting primarily with gay male religious groups. I haven’t been able to identify the women’s groups that are around, except for the leader of the feminist group in Ukraine, and I hope to meet with her this year.”

Rev. Mulcahy is leaving again for Ukraine on May 1. He will stay in Ukraine for five weeks, and then will meet with the head of MCC in Romania in June.

“It’s exciting to watch things bursting out and developing,” he said. “It’s exciting to see young people risking their lives for their ideals. Ageism doesn’t exist there – young people are delighted to have older people help them not make the same mistakes they did – and advise on the intellectual/political/spiritual sides of their lives.”

Rev. Mulcahy will return to the U.S. in June and then will be off again to a theology summer school for gay Christian leaders and activists. He said, “In Eastern Europe, MCC is called ‘the social justice church’. Our work is often activist work, rather than planting churches.

It’s teaching people about the religious right and hatred of gays, as well as about issues like homosexuality and that there is not a single religious choice, but there are other ways to look at these issues. They have been taught that what their church preaches is the only way.

“Here we can expect verbal harassment at Pride. They can expect physical violence, religious people trying to beat them with crosses, skinhead types trying to break through barriers, throwing rocks and attacking the marchers. And the police standing aside and saying they can’t offer protection.”

Rev. Mulcahy notes that flash mobs are

The IDAHO flash mob in Kiev.

becoming popular among Eastern European gay activists. “I was in Kiev for the International Day Against Homophobia (IDAHO),” he said, “and we gathered, about 300 people, at a monument called the Rainbow Arch. After the signal was given, there were brief speeches and balloons were released with anti-homophobia messages.

After about seven minutes, the crowd dispersed before the police could arrive.

“There was no media coverage because to alert the media is to alert the police.

But several people took iPhone photos and sent them to the media, which ran the footage. Of course the comment was negative, but at least people saw it. Flash mobs are a way to do what you ordinarily can’t do.”

On March 20, Rev. Mulcahy was formally received as an Orthodox priest “by a bishop I can’t name” here in the U.S. “Because I was once a Jesuit, I can simply be received into the Orthodox church, rather than having to be ordained. I had to work with an Orthodox priest to learn the liturgy, which can be done in English.

The people I’ll be working with will speak Ukrainian or Russian and I’ll be speaking English for the time being, until I can learn Ukrainian.”

The Russian and Ukrainian languages are related, and most Ukrainians speak Russian. Rev. Mulcahy says, “I’m learning Russian through Rosetta Stone, but there’s no way to learn Ukrainian unless you have a personal tutor. There are few resources except for Harvard, which has the only Ukrainian Institute I am aware of in the country. There are many Ukrainian people in Rochester, including students.”

Rev. Mulcahy says his motivation is to be a “bridge person” – embodying Catholic, Protestant and Orthodox religions.

“It’s illegal for me to do any of this – no foreigner is allowed to hold religious services in Ukraine.”

He says that MCC draws LGBT peo-

ple from all religious backgrounds, and depending on what part of the world you are in, your religious traditions and forms of worship will be influenced by the local traditions you grew up with.

“So in Ukraine, if we have a group of gay people, they come from many traditions, but there will be an Orthodox ‘feel’ to it. So I’m not joining the equivalent of a diocese.”

Next month Rev. Mulcahy will attend the Kiev Pride Celebration and then a Rainbow Pride Festival in a city called Nikolaev. He said, “I was there last year and officiated at several same sex weddings. I have a Lutheran Norwegian priest who would come from Oslo to help me if needed. Some Norwegian and German theologians (two male and two female) are coming to the school to teach this summer. It’s very low profile – it will have a name like ‘Financial Workshop’ or something else innocuous.

“The worst that could happen to us would be to be deported and forbidden to return to Ukraine.”

Rev. Mulcahy receives no salary for this work. “I’m using my life savings,” he said. He plans to move permanently to Ukraine in spring 2013. “It’s for two reasons,” he said. “One: I love it. Two: I can’t afford to live here as a retired person, but I can live on my Social Security there, which you can’t easily do here.

Apartments and food are reasonable, and public transportation is AWESOME. The subway system in Kiev moves a million people a day, the stations are beautiful, it costs 25 cents and I never waited more than two or three minutes for a train!”

Rev. Mulcahy talked about a young woman he met last year – Olena, aged 20. He is known by many in Ukraine as “Jeemi”. “This charming young woman, with spiky hair and piercings, said to me, ‘Jeemi, next year you will marry ME.’ I said I didn’t know she had a girlfriend, and she said she doesn’t – yet!” ■

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the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 455 • april 2012

Making the Scene

NERP DINNER & SHOW: The Northeast Regional Pride Conference on March 10 at the Radisson featured a show starring Jessica Sutta, above left, the Rochester Gay Men’s Chorus and Buffalo’s Dykes of Hazard. Top center: Rebecca Newberry gets carried away. (See article starting on page 1.) Photos: Jeff Mills

Tim Tompkins at Benedetto’s. Photos: Susan Jordan

My Own Private Rochester: Tim Tompkins

By Susan Jordan Everyone has their own private Rochester, but Tim Tompkins actually helps to create Rochester – one piece at a time.

He has two major projects on hand right now.

“I love buying old buildings and remodeling them,” he says.

“That’s my vocation and I enjoy it very much. It’s awful when beautiful historic buildings are torn down. I’ve never built a house – I’ve always restored them.”

At the moment, though, Tim is involved with a partly-new building project – although it is being built on a historic site.

The Voters Block Community includes the development of 92 units of housing, consisting both of new construction and rehabilitation, in the neighborhood of the Susan B. Anthony House. The new building going up at 431 W. Main St., which will incorporate the 1872 Café (to be operated by Spiritus Christi Church), is being erected literally on the site of the building where Susan B. Anthony was arrested for voting in 1872, and will overlook the Voters Block Memorial statue.

The other current project close to Tim’s heart is his newest restaurant, Benedetto’s, which may open as early as next month in a beautiful rehabilitated 1825 brick house on Alexander St. The two-floor restaurant

is a tribute to Tim’s late mother.

Tim also owns the One Restaurant at 1 Ryan Alley, and the Spa and Body Club on Liberty Pole Way and has owned many gay bars over the years, as well as helping the Gay Alliance buy its first community center.

Born in Spencerport, Tim grew up in Churchville/Chili until his family moved to Wayne County and he went to high school at Wayne Central, where he played hockey and was on the swim team.

He has always loved table tennis as well, and was Section 5 champion, going to the state finals several times. He enjoys long walks, especially at Cobbs Hill reservoir, where he enjoys the view and the water. He also spends time at Keuka Lake.

Tim bought his first property in Rochester shortly after graduating from St. Bonaventure. “I remodeled the third floor and rented out the first two floors,” he says. He has never looked back.

“Rochester has been very good to me,” he said. “I became a self made man, as I like to say.

I’m very fortunate. I really like the city. I think health care here is wonderful and we have a great gay community.”

Tim is a member of the congregation of Spiritus Christi Church, which has offices in Downtown United Presbyterian Church. The progressive congregation is led by Father Jim Callan and the Reverend Mary Ramerman.

Aside from his own restaurants, Tim’s favorite place to eat is Rocco’s on Monroe Ave. “Mark Cupola is an extraordinarily talented chef,” he says. “I like his spaghetti bolognese and octopus with green sauce!”

In his spare time, Tim enjoys going to the movies. “I sometimes go alone, just to be there for two hours,” he says. He recently liked “War Horse” and

Tim Tompkins with Father Jim Callan and Rev. Mary Ramerman.

thought “Tinker Tailor” was “brilliant.”

Tim’s favorite local events are political fundraisers. “My favorite was a fundraiser I held for Bob Duffy when he was running for mayor,” he says. He also tries to support AIDS causes.

He said, “On my birthday last Dec. 3 I had a major event to bring attention to World AIDS Day. It was the opening of Dr. Atwaters’ HIV/AIDS poster collection from around the world. He has donated part of the collection to U.R. I had at least 100 posters all around the first floor of my house” (on East Ave.—Tim may soon be moving to the Park Ave. area).

Tim was appointed to the NYS AIDS Council by former Gov. Paterson, and he is trying to get more publicity for PEP, the Post Exposure Program. “This helps people who may have been exposed to HIV. If they get to the hospital emergency room right away and get treatment – they immediately put you on a regimen of drugs – you may not contract the virus.

There is an 80 percent success rate if you’re there within hours,” he said.

Tim feels that there has not been sufficient publicity about

this potentially life-saving program. “I never thought much about it,” he said, “until a friend of mine called me, afraid that he had just been exposed to HIV. Unfortunately, it was too late for him and he is now HIV positive. I think PEP should be more visible and better promoted. Every AIDS care provider in New York should have something about it on their website.

To me, there’s obviously a compassionate argument, but you also have a financial argument – it costs $800 a month for the drugs, but that’s against a lifetime of care for those who are HIV positive.

“There has been no healthcare worker in New York State who has contracted HIV from a finger prick in the last decade, because they immediately go to PEP and get the drugs. So this is proven to work. You can go to the NYS Department of Heath website to learn more about PEP. There’s also a NYS doctor who has a website, PEP411.com.

“I asked for PEP to be on the April agenda for the AIDS Council, to see if we can get every AIDS provider to put on the first page of their website, ‘I have been exposed. Click here: PEP411.com.’” ■

april 2012 • number 455 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

national and international (Hate continued from page 5) riage discrimination in Minnesota, as documented in a recent report by Andy Birkey of the Minnesota Independent. Exodus International, the nation’s largest “exgay” umbrella group, has also decided to weigh in this summer, bringing its annual conference to St. Paul from June 27-30, at exactly the same time that the debate over the proposed anti-gay amendment is expected to reach a fever pitch.

“This is no coincidence,” said TWO’s Becker. “Truth Wins Out plans to be on the ground in Minnesota during Exodus’s road show, and we look forward to collaborating with local and state organizations to fight back against ‘ex-gay’ lies.”

AVP reflects on meaning of Clementi trial verdict Tyler Clementi’s death has brought national attention to the epidemic of LGBTQ youth suicide and the March 16 guilty verdict in the Dharun Ravi case reminds us of the work that we have to do to address the safety of all young people, the National Anti Violence Project writes.

While the focus right now is on the verdict and imminent sentencing, AVP wants to encourage all of us to think about the larger culture in which antiLGBTQ bullying occurs.

“We live in a country where LGBTQ youth are ostracized and shamed. We must address the root causes of bullying by making all people in this country feel safe, loved and accepted for who they are.

We are capable of recognizing and appreciating the talent and gifts that all young people bring to our lives, and we do them – and ourselves – a disservice when we withhold this appreciation because of their sexual orientation or gender identity and expression. We praise young people

for their independence and autonomy, but stigmatize and reject them when they decide to tell us who they are. The solution to LGBTQ bullying and suicide will not be found in courtrooms, but in each of us when we decide to celebrate young people for all of who they are.

“AVP encourages you to report violence you experience or witness to our 24-hour bilingual (English/Spanish) hotline at 212-714-1141, where you can speak with a trained counselor and seek support, or you can report violence anonymously online via our website.”

The Right continues to defame Sandra Fluke Sandra Fluke wanted to testify to Congress about her friend who could not get treatment for her ovarian cysts because her employer wouldn’t cover contraception insurance – which is often used for purposes other than preventing pregnancy. Sandra found herself called a slut and prostitute by Rush Limbaugh, and the sexually-obsessed, woman-hating Right continued to defame her two weeks later, as reported by gay groups and bloggers.

Posted by Alvin McEwen Monday March 12, 2012 8:20 am on pamshouseblend.com: For all of their talking about morality and following God’s laws, religious right groups seem to throw these things out of the window when it doesn’t suit their purposes, particularly the commandment about not bearing false witness.

The lgbtq community knows this hypocrisy very well since we tend to be the recipients of the religious right’s lying vitriol.

But now they have a new target – Sandra Fluke. Fluke, who was venomously attacked by Rush Limbaugh two weeks ago for her testimony in front of Congress regarding contraception, now has members of the religious right smearing her name.

You’ve got our number(S) THE 2012 UNITED WAY DESIGNATION NUMBER 1135 SEFA NUMBER 03-7556 CFC NUMBER 93910

All Benefit the Gay Alliance - Thank you!

According to Equality Matters: “Spokespersons from groups like the American Family Association, Family Research Council, Liberty Counsel and the National Organization for Marriage have come to Rush’s defense while continuing to demonize Fluke as an immoral and promiscuous ‘sexual anarchist.’”

These groups include The American Family Association.

During the March 7 edition of his Focal Point radio show, AFA spokesman Bryan Fischer said in a segment entitled: “Sleeping With So Many Guys That She Can’t Keep Track:” FISCHER: To think that you would have a leftist like the President of the United States saying that the parents of a woman who goes on national TV, admits that she’s sleeping with so many guys that she can’t keep track, doing it three time a day, running out of money, driving me to the poor house, and to think that parents, he’s saying that parents ought to be proud of that. You know, I just wonder if he would be proud if his daughters were doing the same thing. Would he be proud of his daughters going on national TV to say the same thing? [AFA’s Focal Point, 3/7/12] (Except of course she didn’t say anything of the sort.)

N.H. House rejects marriage equality repeal by a vote of 211-116 On March 21, the New Hampshire House of Representatives voted down legislation that would have repealed the state’s two-year-old freedom to marry law, along with a key vote to defeat the Bates Amendment, which would have forced a non-binding referendum on marriage onto the November ballot and replaced marriage with civil unions.

The bill was pushed by conservatives, but approximately 100 Republicans voted against it.

11 The final bill was defeated by a vote of 211 to 116 and the Bates Amendment by a vote of 162 to 188. Stripping away the freedom to marry in New Hampshire was a top priority of national anti-gay organizations, which had predicted that they would be able to garner the vote of two-thirds of both the House of Representatives and the Senate to override the promised veto by Governor John Lynch.

Freedom to Marry’s National Campaign Director Marc Solomon commented, “Live Free or Die is alive and well in New Hampshire. Today’s vote affirms that Granite Staters stand strongly against stripping away freedoms from any of their neighbors. Our opponents tried to abuse the 2010 Republican legislative sweep in New Hampshire to repeal the popular law. What they didn’t count on was the fact that the freedom to marry is becoming a bipartisan value, as resoundingly reflected in today’s vote.”

UPDATE: Craig Stowell, co-chair for Standing Up For NH Families (and Republican Marine brother of gay Calvin Stowell) said, “Today is a banner day for the freedom to marry. Our opponents have been crowing about getting their two-thirds, but in the end, it’s clear they couldn’t muster the votes. This is a victory for our supporters -- the majority of Granite Staters who oppose any roll back of marriage equality -- because they reached out time and again and told lawmakers to leave this law alone.

“This was our opponents’ best shot and they blew it. This was supposed to be the most favorable legislative climate for repeal and they couldn’t even get a majority. Still, we cannot simply pack our bags and go home. Our opponents still want to end marriage equality in New Hampshire and we must keep a watchful eye on the Legislature, and make sure voices of equality are heard in November. But this is a good day for all New Hampshire families who can celebrate tonight and know their marriages are no longer under attack in Concord.” ■

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april 2012 • number 455 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

NO SHIRT SEASON IS COMING!

Body Waxing for Men… you will look better.

Friday Brighton 80 E. Main Street, Webster For Appointment Call: 872-0490

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Please Support A Ride For Pride Biker!

The 3rd Annual Ride For Pride bike ride fundraiser will take place this year on Saturday, June 16, 2012.

All of the money donated goes to the Gay Alliance (minus a teensey-weensey percentage that goes towards use of the firstgiving fundraising site).

Last year we were able to raise over $10,000 for the Gay Alliance!

Donating is easy! Just go to our website at: http://www.gayalliance.org/events/rideforpride.html and click on the name of the rider you would like to support and you will go directly to their fundraising page. Click the “donate” button and follow the instructions.

You can also send a check made out to the Gay Alliance with the rider’s name on it to: Gay Alliance Ride For Pride, 875 East Main St., Suite 500 Rochester, New York 14605 Your support at any level is appreciated. Thank you!

For questions about Ride For Pride 2011 please contact Jeanne Gainsburg at jeanneg@gayalliance.org or 585-244-8640 ext. 14.

GAGA Allies welcome!

MAKE THEIR DREAMS COME TRUE Help our LGBT youth have an unforgettable night!

Support the Big Gay Prom!

This year it’s

THE GAGA GAY PROM: BORN THIS WAY The Prom is May 19 at Artisan Works.

Your donation can help make our youths’ dreams of a special night come true.

Contribute today! The link is: http://www.firstgiving.com/GayAlliance/big-gay-prom-2012

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april 2012 • number 455 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

Shoulders to Stand On behind Kodak offices. St. Patrick’s Catholic Church, a Hispanic Mission Church, was the only church in the Rochester Roman Catholic Diocese that welcomed them. Mass had to be said in Spanish.

There were 13 present at the first Mass.

Early in 1975, Rev. Bruce Hanson, Rector of St. Luke’s Episcopal Church, and Fr. Walt Szymanski, a curate at St. Thomas Episcopal Church, met to discuss bringing a group of gay men to St. Lukes from St. Thomas to meet on Sunday afternoons. Fr. John Robbins was in contact with Rev. Bruce and Fr. Walt. Kodak was expanding behind its offices and St. Patrick’s was scheduled to be demolished. Rev. Bruce gained permission to use the worship space and the parish hall for social gatherings. In the late spring

On the road with Shoulders To Stand On

By Evelyn Bailey On Feb.16, I began a road trip south to interview members of the LGBT community who have moved away from Rochester.

Bill Pritchard’s involvement with Rochester LGBT community began in the late ‘80s with the Political Caucus of the GAGV. Bill joined the Board of the Gay Alliance in 1992, and became Board President in 1994. In 2003 Bill was appointed to fill a vacancy on Rochester City Council, and in 2007 was named Vice President of City Council. In 1994 Bill was awarded the Vinnie Cup. Bill, an openly gay government official for over 18 years, courageously fought to bring equality and full civil rights to the Rochester LGBT community. Now Bill is the Executive Director of the Foundation at Union Hospital of Cecil County, MD. He and his partner Michael live happily in Newark, Delaware with their three dogs.

Bob Dardano, currently working at the Library of Congress in Washington, DC as Senior Acquisitions Specialist, was a gay activist in Rochester in 1984. Bob was involved in fighting for passage of a County anti-discrimination proposal. In June 1984, Bob was awarded the Vinnie Cup. For many years Bob was a staff member of The Empty Closet and in charge of subscriptions. He also was a member of the U. of R. Gay and Lesbian Association, the Rochester Gay Political Caucus and the NYS Lesbian and Gay Lobby, and represented the GAGV on the Rochester Regional Advisory Council of the NYS Division of Human Rights. Bob lives in

Washington, DC and enjoys simply walking to work every day.

The next leg of my journey focused on the early history of Dignity/Integrity Rochester. Dignity-Integrity/Rochester (D-I/R) was chartered in 1975 as the first combined chapter of the national organizations of Dignity/USA (Roman Catholic) and Integrity, Inc. (Episcopal).

As lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and intersexed persons of faith, members of D/I form a small faith community with regional and national connections in the struggle for justice in church and society.

In 1973, a group of gay Catholics, under the leadership of Kevin Scahill and Margaret Mary Lau, began a Rochester chapter of Dignity, the gay Catholic group. Fr. John Robbins, a Basilian priest, was Chaplain. On Sunday they worshipped at St. Patrick’s Catholic Church

21 of 1975, the Episcopal group of gay men and the Catholic group of gay men and women came together for worship and socializing. Thus the beginning of Dignity/Integrity of Rochester!

Cindy Birch, Margaret Mary’s partner described the experience of coming to D/I in this way: “With fear men and women entered the church – not knowing what to expect. They were greeted with open arms and warm hugs. After a few minutes they relaxed and said, ‘I am HOME!’” These brief snippets of my travels among some broad tall shoulders – Bill Pritchard, Bob Dardano, Bruce Hanson, Margaret Mary Lau and Cindy Birch -- will be expanded upon in future articles, the Shoulders To Stand On documentary, our archives, our blog and our written history.

These men and women continue to contribute their openness, passion, warmth, pride and spirit to the communities they now live in. Shoulders To Stand On is proud to know them and proud of the many contributions they have made to the greater Rochester LGBT community. ■

History Corner: April From April 1974 EC: Gay Alliance Meeting Schedule Sun 7 Apr: Business Meeting/Gay Town Meeting. First meeting at the new center location. 713 Monroe Ave. Sun 14 Apr: Center Drop-In Night. No meeting scheduled, but Center open. All welcome – drop in!

Sun 21 Apr: Speaker: “Law Enforcement Problems With Homosexuals; A Policeman’s View.” Representative from the Rochester Police Department.

Sun 26 Apr: Social: Gay Coffee House. Bring food, games, fun. friends, and especially yourself.

Sun 5 May: Business Meeting/Gay Town Meeting.

12 May: Program; “Gay Music.” Bruce Jewell of WCMF’s Green Thursday plays and discusses a newly emerging branch of music.

GAGV meetings are normally held 7:30 Sunday night at the GAGV Center, 713 Monroe Ave., second floor, except as noted above. Meeting topics may occasionally be shifted due to scheduling difficulties Other events of interest: Sundays: Cooking Class. Basic and specialty cooking.

Every Wednesday: Gay Radio Program, “Green Thursdays”. WCMP-PM, 96.5rthz, Wednesday midnight.

Thursdays: Gay Task Force meets, 2 Fuller Place, 8 p.m.

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Columnists The opinions of columnists, editorial writers and other contributing writers are their own and do not necessarily reflect the collective attitude of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley or The Empty Closet.

Growing Up At a certain age

By Eric Bellmann First it’s birthday parties for the fifty year olds. The best is yet to come.

Let’s party. Then the sixty year olds.

Is sixty the new fifty? Then the seventy year olds. That comes as a shock. Eventually we adjust.

Hey, we’re still hanging on. Attitude is everything.

When I was a kid I hung out with a roughneck Italian boy who lived across the street. When his grandmother died, they laid her out at home. Their tradition, I guess. I went to see Jamie. I wasn’t prepared to see his grandmother. That put me off funerals.

But time does march on and now I’ve been to a few. Some were the result of gruesome accidents, others disease, and now it’s old age. Death, the saying goes, is for the living. The funerals of people cut down suddenly are always the worst.

No time to prepare. Caught off guard, families and friends have had no time to process grief, no time to imagine a future without that person who had been essential, vibrant, a part of their lives.

The deaths of old people are weird in other ways. The herd has been thinned.

Who is still around to mourn? Who remembers? Does anyone sit in silence and think: if it had to be someone, better you than me?

But now and then there is a service, a memorial that is terrific. I went to one a few years ago where the surviving son, a man who lived many states away, threw a knock down, drag out gala for his mother, not the easiest woman to get along with, and the festivities blew everyone away.

Endless trays of food. A dance company performed! And there were extensive displays of photographs documenting his mother’s life, a dramatic and charming series of adventures that none of the attendees had a clue about. It was like meeting the dame for the first time. So you just never know.

I read a small notice in the Sunday church bulletin. A memorial service would be held in a few weeks for M.S. Not an uncommon name, but I wondered, was this the M.S. I knew, a woman who had been in an exercise class I used to attend 15 years ago? She would show up at outdoor art fairs when I used to exhibit.

Pleasant woman, good-natured, always smiling, always stopping to say hi.

I inquired. No one seemed to know.

She was in her mid-70s, retired, recovering perhaps from the kind of surgery common among the elderly. Eventually I figured out it was the same woman. I marked it on my calendar. Could it hurt me to go?

My weekly appointment book is not a crowded document. Exercise classes, doctor appointments, a lunch or two each week, a reminder to watch Tosh.O on Tuesday night, maybe a movie at the Dryden. I could work in this memorial service. As I thought about it, I fantasized how thoughtful it would seem of me to tell whoever was there what a pleasant lady M.S. had been. Old, largely forgotten, I assumed, maybe a handful of neighbors or surviving work friends. They’d appreciate my coming, my generous comments.

What a jolt. The sanctuary was packed. Like Christmas Eve. Maybe 500

people. Lots of suits. M.S. had been connected to a classy private school. And then I read the hand-out.

“Hostess, sports fan, dog lover, percussionist, proud Irishwoman, waitress, article clipper” -- and that’s only a third of the list. This lady knew everyone, went everywhere, touched many people, several of whom shared when the time for sharing was announced.

But the best part was the end. Did you notice “percussionist” in the preceding list? She played the goddamn drums!

So a gaggle of really ancient men, friends and colleagues, I assume, assembled and played “When The Saints Go Marching In” in that typical New Orleans slow first verse, upbeat second verse version that they use for funeral marches and it was sublime. They even used her purple drum set! Man, what a finish! Not a lot of dry eyes.

So it came to me to reflect who would remember me and how would they recall knowing me. Well, maybe there’s time to work on that.

Email: elbcad@rit.edu

Cleaning My Closet TIME CRUNCH

By Meredith Elizabeth Reiniger Shug Avery was a Top, snuggling into the hills and valleys of quilt mountains. Alice Walker was an Under, slipping into the Mama Cave beneath those mounds, curling her silky catself into the bend of my knees.

All during my years of singleness, that was a cherished ritual of heavenly coziness. A quaint stereotype of lesbian life: Just me, under quilts handmade by Aunt Lynne, Aunt Ruth, and Mommy Betty, cuddled with my two beloved female felines, all willing to sleep in for many hours of our lives.

Such copious sleeping started when I was a little girl. So deeply asleep that I required wake-up assistance. My mother lovingly complied. Opening the curtains to let sunrays pierce my lids, she would chant “A birdie with a yellow bill hopped upon my window sill, cocked his shining eye and said ‘Ain’t you shamed, you sleepy head?’ ” Not shamed at all… I was a kid and time was, I assumed, easily and endlessly replenished. With that mindset, I have probably slumbered for at least 198,563 hours. Not counting nodding off in classes and movies.

Later, as a teenager, my body demanded at least 12 hours of sleep, forcing me to jam my bazillion activities into the remaining hours of wakefulness. Fruitlessly I fantasized about fashioning a fifty hour day.

All while I was an employed adult, sleep was noticeably an inconvenience. I so wanted each day to expand to ninetynine hours so I could effortlessly read all the journal entries created by my English students. AND so I could regularly lose myself in a for-my-pleasure book. AND so I could squeeze in a perky personal life. Despite my most excellent efforts, the planet perpetuated puny days.

Thirty-two years later, I blissfully shifted into retirement. Significant changes. No longer did I have to throw my weary self out of bed at five-oh-mercy-notthis-early in the morning. At last I could let my natural inner clock hoist my lids.

Oh happy days, I could sleep with neither disruption nor guilt.

Each new dawn offered splendid benefits. At last I could tarry over coffee on my porch, luxuriating in sun warmth as I perused the newspaper. At last I could design endless days of Slow Time… to read, curled in my cushiony pink chair… to dabble in my art studio, decorating furniture… to putter in my gardens.

At last I could schedule Slow Time for any time of day… evening strolls through the park with my love… taking Vegas and Nevada for leisurely morning walks and, best of all, having all the time in the world to be mindful of glinting ponds, floating geese, and dog joy.

And the benefits continued. Unlimited Free Time gave me more days for more movies, concerts, and plays. Entertainment did not have to be wedged between work weeks. My concentration was not interrupted by thoughts rushing toward Monday Requirements. Any day could be FunDay. So that is why I decided to reinstate my fan status, to buy season tickets to Red Wings’ games. Chose Fireworks Fridays.

Perfect, two Fun Things in one night.

Except I forget to factor in reality. Postgame time is really, really late. Without fail and without permission, my old eyelids fell down. Neither sparkles nor bangs could raise them.

Even in retirement, the Sleep Thing is still part of the equation. One difference… I welcome ten hours of sleep, adore sleeping… even with one barrel-body dachshund at my feet and one medically-required pillow between my legs plus one large Border Collie/Springer Spaniel stretched long, crossways. And then, oh yes, possibly snuggling near my soft wyfewomyn.

Subtracting sleep time from my day leaves fourteen hours of wakefulness. Of course they are not all fun and games.

First, like my mother said, I have to do my chores. Of course, I expected Existence Chores to last forever.

But I never anticipated so many timeconsuming Body Maintenance Chores.

It turns out that my used body requires some difficult and embarrassing tasks.

Like three hours of physical therapy just to be able to walk and use my arms.

Like needing iron muscles to manipulate industrial-sized clippers to cut my nails.

Like raising my legs high enough to sand my heels. Like stiffening my hairs to make sure my Do don’t have no vast Old-LadyFlat-Spot on the back of my head.

Tick, tock. Where does the time go?

How often am I lured by the siren call of internet nymphs? Much of the time I can justify it. It is exercise… manual dexterity and brain training by playing vocabulary tests and mahjong. It is amending my gray matter… improving and correcting my information bank. It is The One individual that can answer my every question…

Who are my Lesbian foremothers? What’s the origin of annoying daylight savings time? How do cats make their purrs?

Where do birdies with yellow bills make their nests?

And then, how much time do I waste?

How many precious minutes are sucked up while I delete annoying forwards… those endless pictures of puppies, kitties, and kiddies; pages of puns and junky jokes. Forward this to 24 people and reap wealth. Send this to 11 friends and back to me, or I will hold a grudge forever. This prayer healed 66 close friends, so forward it in the next ten minutes or die.

Oh that. The big question… how much time do I have left? Not in this particular day. In this life. Will I have thirtytwo more gardens? Should I clean out my desk and files today? Buy two tubes of tooth paste when they are on sale?

Conjecture surfaces each time I read obituaries of those I have known, worked with, loved. I realize there is no answer, no website to reveal the date of my departure. Actually I am quite sure that I do not want to know the number of days remaining, quite sure that I would prefer a bolt from the blue.

Or maybe a party of all my friends,

gathered around, singing “Happy deathday to you, dear Meredith, happy no more for you.” Or perhaps I should undertake the pleasant plan, the one where I wake up dead after a good night’s sleep. Oh never mind, I will simply stay in the moment.

Why spoil the surprise?

MeredithElizabethReiniger@frontiernet.net

Faith Matters It’s what – and not who – killed Whitney Houston

By Rev. Irene Monroe An allegation surfaced last month that pop superstar Whitney Houston was murdered.

CNN commentator Nancy Grace ignited a firestorm of criticism speculating Houston’s death might have been a homicide.

“I’d like to know who was around her, who, if anyone gave her drugs, following alcohol and drugs, and who let her slip, or pushed her, underneath that water,” Grace told CNN. On Feb. 11 Houston was found dead in the bathtub of her Beverly Hilton Hotel room on the eve of the Grammy Awards.

Then Houston’s former sister-in-law, Bobby Brown’s sister Leolah Brown, was speaking up too.

“I believe Whitney’s death was not accidental,” Brown told the tabloid television news show “Access Hollywood.”

This new and disturbing allegation flew counter to the Coroner’s Office report that there was no sign of foul play or trauma. Ultimately the official cause of death was drowning due to cocaine use.

While family, friends, and fans blame Whitney’s colossal downfall on drugs and Boston’s R&B bad boy Bobby Brown, both functioned in helping Houston develop an approving black identity and an unquestioning sexuality.

What is now an adoring and all embracing black fan base for Houston was not always the case. In 1989, Houston was booed at the Soul Train Awards for supposedly “not being black enough.”

It was at that same show that she met Bobby Brown.

“I have a theory about Whitney Houston,” said singer-actress Della Reese, a longtime Houston family friend. “I’ve been called ‘Uncle Tom,’ and I know how that feels. I think Whitney was so hurt by being called a ‘sellout’ and ‘acting white’ — and crap like that — she wanted to change her image. What better way to do that than to marry a bad boy? And the drug abuse makes her a flawed person fighting to overcome her demons. Makes her relatable.”

Long before Houston’s former chauffeur Al Bowman told the tabloid television news show “Entertainment Tonight” in February that he witnessed Whitney and Bobby high on crack cocaine and in a threesome with an A-list soul singer in the back of his limo, rumors that Houston was a lesbian had been circulating for more than 30 years. And Houston’s personal assistant as well as best friend Robyn Crawford was rumored to have been Houston’s lesbian lover. For a while, the two women lived together.

“I met her when she was 16. It was at a summer job.… She had peachy colored skin and she didn’t look like anyone I’d ever met in East Orange, New Jersey,” Crawford told reporter Tom Junod in the February 2012 online issue of Esquire Magazine. “And we went around the world. I was her assistant and then her executive assistant and then her creative director. …I have never spoken about her until now. She was a loyal friend, and she knew I was never going to be disloyal to her. Now I can’t believe that I’m never going to hug her or hear her laughter again.”

Houston exhibiting gender nonconforming behavior was no secret to

april 2012 • number 455 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet those closest around her. The Daily Mail reported that Houston’s sister-in-law Tina Brown and her ex-bodyguard Kevin Ammons both believed Houston may have been a lesbian because she “had wild sex sessions with women while out of her mind on crack cocaine.”

But it was her ex-spouse, bad boy Bobby Brown, who over time has come to believe Whitney married him with an ulterior motive. “I believe her agenda was to clean up her image, while mine was to be loved and have children. The media was accusing her of having a bisexual relationship with her assistant, Robin [sic] Crawford. Since she was the American Sweetheart and all, that didn’t go too well with her image.… In Whitney’s situation, the only solution was to get married and have kids. That would kill all speculation, whether it was true or not,” Brown penned in his 2007 tell-all book Bobby Brown: The Truth, the Whole Truth, and Nothing But...

The freest she may have been in expressing her sexuality without being drugged out of her mind might have been in 1999 at the 13th Annual New York City Lesbian and Gay Pride Dance.

Houston that year flew in for a special surprise guest appearance where she performed her then two most recent hits, “It’s Not Right, But It’s Okay” and “Heartbreak Hotel.”

The homophobic constraints of career and family expectations no doubt contributed to the stressors in Whitney’s “down low” life, but so, too, the church, even at her “home-going” (funeral) service.

With homophobes like Pastor Donnie McClurkin, the poster boy for African American “ex-gay” ministries, and gospel singers Angie and Debbie Winans, who released a single in 1998 titled “Not Natural,” in which they self-righteously denounced LGBTQ people, to name a few, singing Whitney farewell, only a “down low” existence was possible for her.

We may never know all the demons that took this internationally renowned

pop star diva down a torturous and troubling road of self destruction, but one demon not mentioned is homophobia.

A Few Bricks Short Sweet Sixteen

By David Hull My niece is 16 years old, an A student in school; her lowest grade is a 99 percent. She’s involved in school chorus, the drama club and works part-time at the dance studio where she takes lessons in jazz and tap dance.

Practically perfect in every way, you say? No! What could be wrong? Everything! She has a boyfriend.

Every weekend she and the boyfriend are busy doing something together. Her social calendar has never been so full.

Her parents are fine with it; her friends are excited for her. Well, everyone else is obviously crazy. It seemed it was time for me to do something about this insane situation.

I was giving my niece a ride home from work one evening, when we stopped

by Dunkin’ Donuts for our favorite snack; decaf coffees and glazed crullers. While seated at a corner table, I mentioned that I didn’t particularly like this whole “boyfriend” thing one little bit.

“I’m 16,” she replied, with a shrug. “So I have a boyfriend. It’s no big deal. What are we – Amish?”

“No, we’re not Amish,” I said. “But you two are always busy. What do you do when you’re out on a date?”

“You mean besides the sex and drugs, right?” She smirked and toasted me with her coffee mug.

“Not funny,” I grumbled.

She shrugged again. “We go to the movies or hang out at the mall or go to

dinner.”

“Where do you go to dinner?” I asked.

“I don’t know,” she replied. “Anywhere. Burger King, the Pizza Shack, the Village Diner. Where did you go to for dinner when you were dating, Uncle David – potluck dinner at the church social?”

“We’re not talking about me right now.” I took a bite of my doughnut for strength. “So, why did you pick this Alan guy to be your boyfriend anyway?

She shrugged once more. Apparently shrugging is the precursor to anything a teenager says these days. “He’s cute. He’s funny. And his name is Alex, not Alan.”

“What about that guy James who came to your birthday party,” I said. “He’s cute. Why not date him?”

“Uncle David, I told you, he’s gay!”

“There’s nothing wrong with dating a cute gay guy.” I shook my head. “I dated hundreds of them in college. They are very nice people.”

My niece sighed. “I thought we weren’t talking about you right now?”

“Why is it so important for you to have a boyfriend all of a sudden? You’re only 16! I didn’t have a serious boyfriend until I was a sophomore in college.”

“Well,” my niece said, shrugging again. “Things have changed a lot since the Depression era.”

“The Depression era!” I gritted my teeth. “How old do you think I am?”

“Remember, we’re not talking about you,” my niece replied, smiling.

“Does Alex have a job?”

“No,” she answered me. “He’s in high school. He plays football and baseball. He really doesn’t have time to work right now.

He might help his Uncle with some driveway sealing jobs this summer though.”

I nodded. “Yeah, driveway sealing -- I hear there’s a lot of money to be made in that field.”

“What am I supposed to do?” my niece, rolled her eyes. “Marry a 16-yearold doctor or lawyer, so I can have a rich, young husband? You always used to tell

23 me that money can’t buy happiness.”

“No, money can’t buy happiness,” I said. “But if you’re going to be miserable, it is a lot more comfortable to cry in a Lexus LX than on a bicycle!”

My niece stopped for a moment and looked thoughtfully into her coffee cup.

Perhaps she was finally seeing my point – even though I myself was not completely clear on what point I was attempting to make.

“Uncle David,” she said. “Is this disagreement about my boyfriend or is this about you and me?”

“What?” I replied.

“Because I think it might be about you and me.”

I opened my mouth, but no words came out.

“I know with school and work and now with all the time I spend with Alex,” my niece told me, “We don’t really have any time to spend together. Like, when the new Twilight movie came out and you used to take me to see them, but now I went with Alex. Or how you and I used to have shopping trips to the mall, but we haven’t done that in a long time.”

My niece shook her head. “It’s not that I’ve forgotten you. It’s just that I’m really busy and I’m growing up. And you’re always telling me that I was ‘raised right’, so isn’t growing up what I was being raised to do?”

Nothing is worse than that moment in the middle of a disagreement when you suddenly realize that you are wrong. And nothing worsens that moment even more than having your teenage niece show you how wrong you really are.

I guess Alex really wasn’t so bad. He was kind of cute and funny, I suppose.

I didn’t dislike him so much as I was unhappy with the whole situation.

I had to admit that I did long for those days when my niece was young and I could pick her up and hold her and control her. Maybe that was still what I wanted to do, but, when you’re dealing with a 16-year-old, that was … well, that was

24

Columnists ( Bricks continued from page 23) totally “terrid” (as my niece would say, although I have no idea what the heck it means, except that it’s really bad!).

“Well,” I said hesitantly. “Maybe you might possibly be right.”

My niece smiled. “So if I’m right, then you would be … ?”

“Is this necessary?” I asked.

She nodded, still smiling.

“Then I was wrong,” I admitted.

“Wow,” she said. “Hearing that was sweeter than this doughnut!”

OK, so I had been put in my place by a teenager. It was humiliating, but it wasn’t all bad. The very next weekend my niece let me go to the mall with her and Alex!

You can contact David at Davidhull59@aol.com

NY Gay Wedding Consultant Here Come The Brides

By Eve Elzenga One of the surprising gay wedding trends is the feminine, traditional march up the aisle of two brides -- both in wedding gowns.

And while I am seeing lots of brides selecting ivory colored dresses, they still are true bridal gowns.

In the beginning, I never envisioned legions of lesbians embracing this mainstream norm. But now that we have the freedom, we can dream big and do it up.

While not every couple will choose this option, your wedding is the perfect moment to show a soft, warm, beautiful side of yourself. Now, how to find “The

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 455 • april 2012 Dress” that is perfect for you?

You can start by looking for ideas and styles at on-line bridal sites or in bridal magazines. But don’t limit yourself. If you want to be married on the shores of Lake Ontario at sunset in July, you could consider caftans. If you love the BoHo look, think about wearing luminous silk tunics with skinny silk pants and loads of white and ivory beads, scarves and bracelets.

Talk to each other about what you want to wear. If each of you wants to shop independently, take one of your trusted “in common” friends with you to the store. That way you won’t wind up both buying the same dress! While that might be funny to your guests, you may not be as amused when you each “surprise” the other on your wedding day.

You don’t have to be locked into going to a bridal salon for a gown. You can shop at vintage stores and thrift and consignment shops. Remember, you don’t have to spend a lot to look great on your wedding day.

If you do plan to buy a gown at a traditional bridal salon, expect to order the dress 12 weeks before the wedding.

It will come in sooner than that, but you will have to be fitted several weeks before the wedding. That is true for any gown you buy. You can have a dress altered at your salon or take your dress to a tailor shop that specifically works on wedding dresses. They also will press your gown and get it ready for the big day.

A practical point of using a bridal salon is that they will help you with the underpinnings of your dress – strapless, long line bras; slips; Spanx. They also have the trimmings – sashes, veils, tiaras, shoes, jewelry – that will “finish” your look. Be warned: salon accessories are pricey. Consider looking online or in local non-bridal shops for these items at more reasonable prices.

One thing not to overlook in your

quest for a dress is Comfort. Be realistic about how much pain you can take for the sake of beauty and glamour. Navigating in a form fitting bridal gown for eight hours is not for everyone. Think about what it will be like to sit, stand and dance in the dress you are considering.

Plus Size brides face a challenge in buying a dress in Rochester. Most traditional salons do not carry and cannot/

will not order plus sized gowns. The place that has the best selection in town is David’s Bridal. They also have sample gowns in all sizes on sale. I recently shopped with a bride and she bought an $800 gown for $200. It looks beautiful on her and we both know what a great bargain it was.

Happy shopping and if you need help, the NY Gay Wedding Consultant is just a phone call away: 585 733-2579. ■

april 2012 • number 455 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

Community Find the friends and fun you need Find the friends, fun, and common interests you’re looking for through in your neighborhood of the LGBT the various groups listed below. community.

Dignity-Integrity D-I Rochester meets weekly at 5 p.m. at St. Luke’s and St. Simon’s Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St., corner of Broad St. First Sunday: Episcopal Mass/Healing Service, with music; Second Sunday: Special Easter Sunday Service, with music; Third Sunday: Quiet Episcopal Mass in the Chapel; Fourth Sunday: Evening Prayer, followed by a Potluck Supper; Fifth Sunday: Evening Prayer, followed by a special program.

April Potluck Theme: “Primavera,” one of the words for spring, brings to mind fresh foods and new recipes. Spring will have just begun on the fourth Sunday of April, so bring your favorite dish that means “spring” to you! No time to cook? Join us anyway as there is always plenty to share.

Schedule Change: Easter falls on the second Sunday of April this year, and we usually celebrate with a Roman Catholic Liturgy of the Word. However, the Rev. Michael Hopkins has offered to celebrate Easter Sunday for us with an Episcopal Mass. Join us if you can!

Special Program: Mary Ellen and Casey Lopata, the founders of Fortunate Families, will join us on Sunday, April 29.

They will update us on the work of Fortunate Families and Equally Blessed (a coalition which also includes Dignity USA, New Ways Ministry and Call to Action).

You can always check for updates at our website (http://www.di-rochester. org/) or by calling the DI Hotline at 585234-5092.

Just Us Guys Keeping up the momentum of the LGBT March Health Month, our April 10 gathering will focus on learning more about Yoga, Tai Chi and Qi Gong basics.

With the help of some selected DVDs we will explore some of the essential poses, postures and repetitive movements that make these art forms so unique and powerful at all levels. Since this is a new subject matter for most of the group, it should be an interesting experience and good introduction of the group to any visitors.

Gathering time is 6 p.m. in the lower level conference room at AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave. For visitors unfamiliar with the building, there is a security booth in the entrance hall that will provide directions.

Many of our guys are long time supporters of the Rochester Gay Men’s Chorus through attending concerts and benefit functions. We are pleased that a current JUG member is one of the At Large Members of the RGMC Board of Directors. During the months of April and May there are three special benefit events which JUG members will be helping promote. The Chorus is a local gem that deserves support from all of us. To learn more specifics about these events, make an online visit to www.thergmc.org To learn more about our group, contact Ron at 729-2259 or email rmatter1@ rochester.rr.com

LORA & Dyke Picnic Kick Off L.O.R.A (Lesbians Of Rochester & Allies) meets the second Friday of each month for potluck and Games Night, 6–10 p.m., GAGV Youth Center, 875 E. Main St. www.l-o-r-a.com; info@l-o-r-a. com or call: 585-313-3037 Dyke Picnic Kick Off Party @ 140 Alex takes place on Sat., April 21 from 6-10 p.m., 140 Alexander St. Upstairs Room.

Join us as we kick off our event! Dinner and entertainment! 140 Alex has two menus to choose from – a bar menu and dinner menu. Lots to choose from! NO COVER! So come hang out with us! Meet some of the female performers and have FUN! Seating is limited so come early. First come first served!

Special thanks to the kind folks at 140 Alex for donating the upstairs room for our kick off party.

Rochester Butch Femme Connection The Rochester Butch-Femme Connection will have two supper events in April 2012.

On Saturday, April 14, we will meet at Cracker Barrel Restaurant on Hylan Drive in Henrietta at 7 p.m. (take Hylan Drive over Route 390 heading away from Wegmans and it’s on the right).

On April 28, we will meet at East Ridge Family Restaurant on East Ridge Road in Irondequoit at 7 p.m.

For further information on the Connection, contact Kerry/Max at (585) 288-7208, email DressyFemme@aol.com or check out our Facebook page http:// www.facebook.com/bfconnection.

Rochester Gay Men’s Chorus First rehearsal of the June Cycle is announced!

The Rochester Gay Men’s Chorus will hold voice placements and first rehearsal of the spring season on Thursday, April 5, at 6:30 p.m. at the Downtown United Presbyterian Church, 121 N. Fitzhugh St. in Rochester, with the rehearsal beginning at 7 p.m.

Now is the time to consider joining us as we celebrate into the summer. Singing together with a common purpose is not only fun and fulfilling, but builds friendships. Under the artistic direction of Dr. Robert Strauss, this season bursts with promise. Strauss looks forward to meeting new members and longtime friends at the first rehearsal in April.

During the voice placement Dr. Robert Strauss will take a few minutes to listen to your range and voice type using some simple vocalization. The voice placement is also an opportunity to chat with Rob about what you’d like to gain from your choral experience with RGMC and to discuss the most effective ways for you to contribute to the ensemble.

In June 2012, “Road Trip” will feature an eclectic mix of songs from pop to jazz to classical and back again, including California Dreamin’, Georgia on My Mind, Last Letter Home, and the world premiere of the TTBB version of Were the World Mine. The concert, Saturday, June 16 at 8 p.m. in Hochstein, is sure to thrill our audience.

Those with questions can go to our website, www.thergmc.org, or call (585) 423-0650.

Rochester Trans Group We have some really exciting news for our April 28 meeting! Through Jeanne Gainsburg’s efforts (she’s the Gay Alliance’s Community Outreach person) members of the Transgender Alliance of Central New York and, from Buffalo, members of Spectrum Transgender Group WNY and the Buffalo Belles will both be coming to Rochester to share ideas, food, and FUN! This visit is unprecedented in the history of the RTG, so please plan to take advantage of this unique opportunity to meet and talk and then PARTY with trans members from Buffalo and Syracuse! So we hope to see you at 3 p.m. on Saturday, April 28.

Now back to our Feb. 25 meeting.

Even though we were having one of the few blizzards of the season, we still had 16 people, including our engaged couple who came all the way from Waterloo!

We began with Courtney Michie who is the Rochester community coordinator for ESPA (the Empire State Pride Agenda) enthusiastically introducing herself and explaining what ESPA is doing about getting GENDA (the Gender Non Discrimination Act) enacted as a law in our state legislature.

She also emphasized that since Marriage Equality was passed, the only thing that ESPA will be concentrating on and lobbying for is GENDA. There is more information on all this and more at www.prideagenda.org.

Then Kelly Clark, Director of Community Safety for the Gay Alliance, gave an insightful talk about crime and what makes a crime a “hate crime” or not and just how difficult it is to prosecute a crime as a hate crime. There are a number of criteria the crime has to meet, including that the victim is picked because of who they are or who they are “perceived” to be.

She also discussed her (as she put it, personal project) in which she is trying to shift the conversation of the rights as guaranteed in our Constitution as compared to the Universal Declaration of Human Rights as decreed by the United Nations in 1948. It was quite eye opening and somewhat unsettling.

We meet in the Gay Alliance’s Youth Center, located on the first floor in the Auditorium Center, 875 E. Main St. Parking is available in the back of the theatre on College Ave., between Prince and Goodman. Note: if there is a guard at the booth, just say you’re here for the Gay Alliance and they have instructions to let you in without paying the parking fee.

And thank you Kayla for once again providing probably the richest “fugdistist” treat yet!

We hope you can join us for April’s meeting. It might be a once in a ? event to meet with and party with other Trans group members in upstate New York!

(See article, page one.)

25

Rochester Women’s Community Chorus: With a Song in Their Hearts “I love my chorus!” These four words have become something of a chant, a heartfelt sentiment that resonates throughout the second floor room of the Downtown United Presbyterian Church on Fitzhugh St., where the Rochester Women’s Community Chorus rehearses each Tuesday evening.

As a new member of this chorus, all I can say is, “Me too!” And why not?

Ever since the day I joined the group back in September, I’ve been welcomed warmly by this diverse gathering of women. Women of all stripes – ethnicities, beliefs, experiences and orientations -- are embraced here. There are even opportunities for non-singing members (female or male). What could be more inclusive than that?

And then there is RWCC’s wonderful music director, Kristy Houston.

Beyond her impeccable soprano voice, her terrific sense of rhythm and brilliant teaching methods, Kristy’s enthusiasm and generous good cheer feel like a breath of fresh air. If we can’t read music, we’re told, that’s OK. If we need a line repeated a few times, that’s OK too. Everyone learns differently. But learn we do. With most songs written in four-part harmonies, there is much to be learned in preparation for our two main concerts per year.

And speaking of concerts, our current performance venue is the magnificent sanctuary in St. Anne’s Church on Mt. Hope Ave. We performed our winter concert there and will sing there again on Saturday, June 9 at 7:30 p.m.

The theme of our spring concert is “With You by My Side.” It promises to delight listeners with a lovely collection of songs; some you’ll recognize and others will be new. The entire Rochester community is invited to come out and enjoy.

If you’re interested in further information, or perhaps joining us, please check out our website at: http://www. therwcc.org/

ROMANS do volleyball in the nude!

Do you love to play volleyball?

Have you ever thought it would be fun to play a friendly game in the nude?

Romans (Rochester Male Naturists) will be having a nude game Saturday evening, April 7.

This is a fun, friendly game for all levels of skill from beginners to pros. If this sounds like something you would like to try, even if for only once in a lifetime to say you did it, call the Romans at 585-281-4964 or email www.wnyromans.com for the details. The evening also offers nude swimming, a hot tub, sauna, and steam room, along with workout machines and free snacks. First time attendees get in for free!

The Romans group has been hosting clothes-free social activities for men in the Rochester and Western New York area for over twenty years. The group is open to all gay-friendly men ages 21 and over who respect men in all colors, sizes, shapes, ages, and textures. ■

A Special Getaway Off-Season Rates

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the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 455 • april 2012

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april 2012 • number 455 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

Arts & Entertainment

Barry Anderson

“Jersey Boy” Barry Anderson knows an actor’s life on the road

By Susan Jordan Barry Anderson plays Bob Crewe, manager of Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons, in Jersey Boys, which returns to the Auditorium Theatre April 3-29.

Barry’s career includes the following credits: Broadway: Legally Blonde (Aaron Schultz); National Tour: Legally Blonde, My Fair Lady; Regional: Where’s Charley? (Charley); Bye Bye Birdie (Albert); Honk! (The Cat); The Civil War; TV/film: “30 Rock,” “As The World Turns,” “Forward & Gone.”

Barry is a Music graduate of the University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire, and a proud member of Actor’s Equity. Visit www.youtube.com/andersonandpetty or www. andersonandpetty.com for more information.

Recently Barry Anderson talked to The Empty Closet about Jersey Boys and his career. “I’m from a small town of about 1,500 in rural Wisconsin,” he said. “It was a great place to be raised. And even though it couldn’t have been further removed from New York City, luckily there always seemed to be opportunities to perform. I come from a musical family; my dad and his brothers still play in a band. So performing with and for other people never seemed odd in any way. I began taking piano lessons when I was eight, and I LOVED it. Singing and acting seemed equally exciting, even if just for the small school and church programs. When I was 12, I did a summer stock production of Peter Pan, and I think that was the point at which the ‘show business bug’ first appeared.”

Barry hopes to have a diverse, varied, and long career in the entertainment industry, and admires those whose careers have lasted. “To be able to have ‘done it all’ would be fantastic, needless to say,” he noted. “The bulk of my work as an actor has been onstage in the theatre. Just in the past couple of years I’ve begun to explore more of the TV/film side of things, and I absolutely want to do more of that. It’s a completely different beast than doing a live show eight times a week, that’s for sure. It’s challenging in a whole different way. But it’s all fun. As far as the future goes, I think I will remain content and grateful as long as I’m able to do work I’m proud of and enjoy.”

His inspirations are actors who have had long and varied careers. “Artists who don’t let their age stop them from performing and doing what they love are the ones I find most inspiring, hands down. Christopher Plummer, Angela Lansbury, Hal Holbrook, Betty White... actors with vital, busy careers who just happen to be in their 80s and 90s! They are the sort of actors that I have the most respect for. To me, it’s always fun to get to work with people who have been in the business for a long time and are still there, in the trenches, doing the work because they love it.

Cool stuff.”

Jersey Boys features a lot of classic pop songs that take audiences of a certain age back to their youth, and send people of all ages out of the theatre with the tunes stuck in their heads.

Barry says that Rochester audiences should prepare themselves for “a great night in the theatre!

In addition to featuring all of the famous Four Seasons hits, the show is masterfully crafted and has a superb book. It is so well-

written, so well-directed... Audiences get a ‘behind-the-music’ look at an iconic group’s rise to stardom. The show makes people laugh, it makes them cry, and the music takes them back in time, it seems. Men love it.

Women love it. By the end of the night, audiences are on their feet, dancing and singing along.

For those of us onstage, it’s a pretty rewarding view!”

Barry plays a real person, Bob Crewe, who not only managed the group but also wrote much of their material. “I have an absolute blast playing Crewe,” he says. “I feel so lucky to visit the role every night! The fact that all of the characters in our play actually existed has made the research aspect so helpful. Crewe served as the Four Seasons’ producer and co-writer, and he has had such an impressive and colorful career through the years.

He was a Jersey boy himself, raised in Belleville. But he was definitely refined. He recorded a bit as a soloist, he was a fashion model at one point, he had a love and talent for visual arts and design. And then, of course, he’s best known now as a music producer -- his influence on the industry is huge. With our play, audiences get a fun sense of his eccentricities and his sexuality.

There are no apologies there. But he was also really good at his job.

So all of these aspects factor into my characterization of this man.

The writers have given Crewe some wickedly funny lines, the costumes are amazing, so it’s a complete joy!”

Life on the road can be challenging, as actors fly or bus from city to city, waking up in an unfamiliar place most days and seeking to win over new audiences. The Jersey Boys cast will be here for an entire month and will get to know Rochester.

Barry says, “I am having a great time touring with this show. Our cast is so talented, and our tour schedule is wonderful. We are getting to play some really cool cities. This will be my first time playing Rochester, actually, and I’m looking forward to spending a month in the city.

“This is my third time touring with a show, so I’ve had my share of crazy stuff happen on the road. Years ago, I did my first tour right after I finished college -- a non-union, bus-andtruck tour. Towards the end of our grueling seven-month stint of mostly one-nighters, we were scheduled to sit-down in Oklahoma City for a whole week (!), which we considered a luxury.

Our second day in town, however, the hotel we were staying in caught fire and burned down.

Not fun. And just a tad inconvenient... But fortunately everyone was safe, no one was hurt, and the show went on... I think we all paid our dues on that one! I am happy to report that our Jersey Boys tour has been nothing but smooth sailing. It’s a dream job, and I’m excited to be bringing the story to so many parts of the country.”

Tickets are on sale at the Auditorium Theatre, 800-7453000; www.rbtl.org. ■

27

Mini-interview: Jessica Sutta on “sutta pop”

By Susan Jordan The lovely Jessica Sutta, formerly of the Pussycat Dolls, headlined the show at the NERP conference dinner on March 10 at the Radisson. She talked to The Empty Closet about her views on show biz and her ultimate dreams.

Empty Closet: What are some of the biggest challenges when starting a solo career as a performer?

Jessica Sutta: First of all, the entertainment industry, in my opinion, is one of the hardest industries in the world. The business is tough and requires you to believe in faith whole heartedly. I think the biggest challenge is to never give up and set out for your goals, no matter what. I’ve learned that dreams indeed come true.

EC: Who are the singers/performers who have inspired and influenced you most?

JS: Kylie Minogue, Beyoncé,

Jessica Sutta

Madonna and Britney Spears.

EC: Do you have a new CD, and how can our readers get it?

JS: My album is entitled “sutta pop” and is set to be released in September 2012.

EC: How would you define your musical and personal styles?

JS: Pop dance house with a dash of “sutta pop”.

EC: What is your ultimate career dream or aspiration?

JS: To be able to travel and perform around the world with “sutta pop.” I want to inspire young performers. And to love and be loved. ■

Kate Clinton

ImageOut presents Kate Clinton’s “All Fracked Up” Tour Get ready for an earthquake of laughter! At 8:30 p.m. on Friday, April 13, ImageOut, Rochester’s Lesbian and Gay Film and Video Festival, will present An Evening of Comedy with Kate Clinton at the Hochstein Performance Hall, 50 N. Plymouth Ave. Part of ImageOut’s 20th anniversary year line-up, Kate’s brand new “All Fracked Up” tour comes four years after the fabulous sold-out “Hilarity Clinton” show, that proved a great success as ImageOut’s largest event to date.

“We are thrilled to have Kate back in Rochester,” says ImageOut Board Chair Paul Allen.

“She’s a superb entertainer, blending sharp-witted political and sociological commentary with true comic genius. We think she’ll find a broad audience in Rochester for her take on politics, the environment,

media, and much, much more.

And her upstate connection will make her fit right in.”

“Born in Buffalo, raised in Syracuse – I’m happy to be returning to my Upstate roots,” says Clinton, who also praises ImageOut for its years of presenting films for and about the LGBT community. “ImageOut isn’t just the best film festival in Rochester – it’s one of the best in the country. Happy 20th anniversary, I’ll bring the popcorn!”

Tickets are on sale now for $30 and will be $35 at the door.

They may be purchased online by credit card at www.imageout. org, at the ImageOut office, 274 N. Goodman St, Suite A203, Monday-Friday from 1-5 p.m. (cash, check, or charge), Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave, (cash or check) and OUTlandish Video and Gifts, 274 N. Goodman St. (cash or check). Group tickets sales are available. For more information contact the ImageOut office by phone, 585271-2640, or by email at office@ imageout.org. ■

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Bread & Water Theatre protests city demand for big annual licensing fee

By Susan Jordan J.R. Teeter, director of Bread & Water Theatre Company, a small theatre company which performs at New Life Presbyterian Church, 243 Rosedale St. in the Upper Monroe neighborhood, was startled to receive a letter from the Rochester Police Department on Jan. 25, informing him that he had not obtained an Entertainment Center License from the city – cost $475.

Teeter, whose troupe has been staging plays and events at New Life for seven years, including the annual gaythemed Rainbow Theatre Festival, was not aware that a license was required for small and/or non-profit theatre groups and had never received such a notification. A Shakespeare performance group, which staged plays at the church before Bread & Water was founded, had never been required to pay this fee.

Teeter says that the upcoming April and May Rainbow Theatre Festival series will continue as planned. “The Mirror of Life” opened March 30 and closes April 1, and “She Said/She Said” opens April 13.

He told The Empty Closet, “Every year you must pay $475 – and if you were notified and you paid in December, you will have to pay again in January – the license is renewable every January. I’ve reached out to City Council about this, and there may be potential for a change to the ordinance to make it less crippling for non-profits, charities and small startup groups. What we’re doing is in the public interest. We’re keeping the church building in use and giving money to the church.”

Teeter feels that the ordinance was originally intended to control bars and nightclubs, since it refers to “fighting and rowdy behavior… illegal or excessive consumption of alcoholic beverages…

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 455 • april 2012 gambling,… prostitution” etc. – none of which takes place at Bread & Water Theatre performances. It specifically talks about HIV and Teeter feels the ordinance also is meant to apply to gay bars, nightclubs and bathhouses. The ordinance requires that groups meet zoning and other specifications – and the New Life Church already meets all requirements.

Teeter says what startled him the most was the fact that the City and the Rochester Fire Department have sponsored Bread & Water productions in the past. For last year’s production of “The Arsonist,” Teeter says, “We were loaned costumes by the city – two actors wore dress uniforms from the Rochester Fire Department and the Fire Department even purchased ad space in our program!”

He added that the group had community sponsorship from the Rochester/ Monroe County Youth Bureau for its production of “Polaroid Stories.”

“I asked the Police Department about this,” Teeter said, “and they replied, ‘Sometimes the left hand doesn‘t know what the right hand is doing.’”

Teeter says, “In terms of money, to pay that sort of fee every year is so exorbitant that only well-established groups or businesses could afford it. It puts all non-profits and start-ups out of business.”

He noted that the ordinance applies to any public performance (theatre, film, DJ, etc.) in any space, even if it is for charity or if there is no admission charge. He said, “This could even apply to amateur performances on somebody’s front porch.

The only exempt place is performances on municipal property – they don’t have to pay anything. Churches are not exempt – but I’ve heard that the city would not hit on a church performance, like the jazz concerts at Christ Church or the Lutheran church that does ‘Exodus to Jazz.’ But the city does insist that non-profits doing charity performances pay the $475.”

Teeter says that his group is wondering if someone who knows about the ordinance and doesn’t like some of their

productions – perhaps the gay-themed ones – may have reported them to the police in order to shut them down.

In any case, he said, “The first thing we did was start to contact the media – City newspaper, the D&C, The Empty Closet – anyone who will listen to us. We want to get the word out to the public. We have a petition on Change.org and it’s on Facebook under Bread & Water Theatre.

We’ve also been petitioning City Council to revise the law. The more people find out about this, the more they get upset. It just doesn’t make sense.”

What’s coming up for April at Equal=Grounds “Seasons of Change,” multi-media art works by Allison J. Nichols, will be shown at The Gallery at Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave., April 1-28.

The opening reception is April 6, 7-9 p.m.

“Erotic Nights 2012” will present its second evening of multi-artist expression on April 14 at 8 p.m. at Equal Grounds.

The series is produced by Diane Conway of CSWA (Culture Starts With Art).

Rivera-Ortiz Foundation seeks entries for 2012 photography grant The Manuel Rivera-Ortiz Foundation for International Photography, London/ w York/ Paris/Zurich, announces its second International Call for Entries.

In 2011, the Foundation garnered nearly 200 entries from some 45 countries around the world, culminating in a $5000 USD grant awarded to Mr. Mads Nissen of Denmark.

The Manuel Rivera-Ortiz Foundation for International Photography is again seeking entries for outstanding work in global and social documentary photo reportage. Covering such pressing issues as health, poverty, oppression, war, fam-

Photo: Mads Nissen

ine, religious/political persecution and upheaval, human migration and immigration, the landless and much more, photographers of all nationalities who are 18 years of age or older are encouraged to apply.

Entries must be submitted no later than May 31, 2012, to be eligible. Please visit http://www.mrofoundation.org for entry rules and submission details found under our “Grant 2012” header on our website. The photographer whose proposal is selected to receive the $5000 USD grant will be immediately contacted, followed by a public press announcement to be made sometime in late July. Send your submission to submissions@mrofoundation.org.

Brian O’Neill, Beth Bailey art exhibits both open on April 6 Two art exhibits will open on April 6, in addition to the show at the Gallery at Equal=Grounds.

Brian O’Neill’s “The Bridge Between Two Worlds” opening is 5-9 p.m. at the Arts & Cultural Council, 277 N. Goodman St. The show benefits AIDS Care.

Beth Bailey’s art work, “Fractured Fairy Tales” and “American Road Trip,” will have an opening reception from 6:309:30 p.m. at the Gallery Salon & Spa, 780 University Ave. ■

april 2012 • number 455 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

Travel

The bus on the roof of St. Louis City Museum.

St. Louis

By Merle Exit St. Louis, Missouri is a great travel destination for those who love the arts and entertainment. Here is part one of my tour.

St. Louis’ Citygarden, a 2-year-old attraction, is a blend of lush plantings and sculptures with water, stone, architecture and landscape design, located in the downtown area and open to the public all year; there are no fences, gates or admission fee.

City Museum is just a few blocks away, with art made entirely from recycled pieces. In a former warehouse, the owner took items that would have become landfill and filled the floors with quirky and innovative artistic fun. You can certainly spot the museum by a bus that appears just about to fall off the roof, as well as a real ferris wheel a few steps away.

Off to the Fabulous Fox Theatre to see a musical, “The Addams Family.” This 1929 movie palace, located in the Grand Center Arts and Entertainment District, is one of the first theatres built for “talkies” by movie mogul William Fox. It’s quite a showy place with a style described as Siamese-Byzantine, a 90-foot lobby and Buddhist monastery halls. On Saturday, April 14, 2012 the Fox Theatre is having A Taste of History, Last Dinner On The Atlantic, to celebrate the Titanic Centennial Weekend.

In downtown St. Louis at Lindell Blvd. and Newstead Ave. stands ornate Saint Louis Cathedral, with the largest collection of mosaics in the world. More than 41 million pieces of tesserae in 8,000 mosaics fill more than 83,000 square feet.

Off to the 1,300-acre Forest Park with attractions such as the Saint Louis Art

Museum, St. Louis Zoo, Science Center, Missouri History Museum, and The Muny Theatre. Can’t take them all in, but did manage the Missouri History Museum, which displays the artifacts of St. Louisans who have contributed to American and world culture, including musicians Miles Davis and Chuck Berry, writer T.S. Eliot and designer Charles Eames.

The Peabody Opera House (formerly the historic Kiel Opera House) held its grand re-opening. This 3,100-seat theater in the heart of downtown has brought in Jay Leno and Aretha Franklin.

A tour of an area of St. Louis known as The Loop is renowned for its nightlife. On one Wednesday every month, at 9 p.m. sharp, a white Cadillac pulls into the parking lot of St. Louis’ Blueberry Hill Club, as Chuck Berry pulls his guitar case from the trunk to perform at the Duck Room. Chuck Berry’s star on the St. Louis Walk of Fame sits at the entrance to Blueberry Hill, as well as a new statue of “The Father of Rock’n’Roll.” We later got to see him make a quick appearance at the Peabody Opera House.

We’re outdoors for awhile as we ride through the Missouri Botanical Garden, said to be the oldest public garden in the United States and founded by English immigrant Henry Shay. It’s also considered one of the top three public gardens in the world. The New York Botanical Gardens is one of the other two.

Laumeier Sculpture Park is a 98-acre park containing a collection of more than 80 contemporary sculptures by internationally acclaimed artists. It specializes in interpretive exhibitions and education programs.

For further information on St. Louis, Missouri, go to www.explorestlouis.com ■

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the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 455 • april 2012

The Gay Alliance plays a central role in advocating for the fair and equal treatment of all people, regardless of their sexual orientation, gender identity or gender expression.

Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley www . g a y a l l i a n ce . o r g

Front row L-R: Shauna O’Toole, Patti Jones, Noah Wagoner, and Jason Roberts. Back row L-R: Jeanne Gainsburg, Jennifer Mathews, Kevin Eich, Ashley Zuppelli, and Amy Parkhill.

Wegmans School of Pharmacy: A national leader in Transgender education

By Jeanne Gainsburg, Outreach Coordinator For the past four years, the Gay Alliance has partnered with the Wegmans School of Pharmacy (WSOP) at St. John Fisher College to provide presentations on LGBT issues to the pharmacy students in their classroom.

We were invited in by Assistant Professors Amy Parkhill and Jennifer Mathews, who felt that LGBT inclusion in their curriculum was an essential part of the diversity program for their pharmacy students. The Gay Alliance has been providing two classes a year: one focused on basic LGBT issues in the healthcare setting and the other completely dedicated to understanding the challenges faced by transgender clients.

Here is a quote from a stu-

dent who participated in these classes this past January: “I don’t think my new found respect and increased understanding for those who undergo a gender reassignment will wane anytime soon. I am very grateful that we were able to have an open discussion with the panel, and thankful that they were willing to put themselves out there like that. For those who are ready to be out, I will be glad to be their advocate and help to further awareness and fight against ignorance and hatred toward them.”

Dr. Parkhill and Dr. Mathews concluded that not only were these classes having a profound impact on the students, but that WSOP was one of the only pharmacy programs in the country who were providing this type of education.

Dr. Parkhill stated, “As we were developing the course, we were excited to include the ‘gender spectrum’ panel because it would provide a unique opportunity for our students to interact with a patient population that

has significant healthcare barriers. However, I do not think that we realized at the time how unique this really was. As we researched this further, we found that there is little to no information about the inclusion of LGBT topics in pharmacy education. Given the important role that medications have in maintaining the quality of life for transgender individuals, pharmacists will undoubtedly be one of the healthcare providers that transgender patients most frequently interact with. So it really is up to us to respond to this need.”

Realizing the importance of getting this info out to more schools and more pharmacists, Dr. Parkhill and Dr. Mathews, together with Scott Fearing, Gay Alliance Program Director and myself, co-authored a paper titled “The Need for Transgender Health Content in the Pharmacy Curriculum,” which was recently published in INNOVATIONS in Pharmacy. http://www.pharmacy.umn. edu/innovations/prod/groups/ cop/@pub/@cop/@innov/ documents/article/cop_article_367213.pdf Dr. Mathews worked with Pharm D candidate Kevin Eich to organize a continuing education presentation entitled A Different Point of View: Overcoming Barriers to Healthcare in Transgender Patients. The presentation was offered on March 11, to local pharmacists and pharmacy students. Although a typical turnout for these presentations is usually around 40 people, this one had over 110 attendees.

The presentation was cosponsored by The Wegmans School of Pharmacy, the Gay Alliance, the Pharmacy Society of Rochester and the Roches-

ter Area Society for Health-Systems Pharmacists. Kevin Eich began the evening with an informative review of some basic transgender terminology.

This was followed by Dr. Ashley R. Zuppelli, of WSOP and AIDS Care, who facilitated an impressive presentation on the limited coverage of transgender health in pharmacy and medical education, identifying barriers to healthcare in transgender patients, promoting transgenderfriendly environments, the goals of hormone therapy and finally a review of drug interactions and the adverse effects associated with hormone therapy.

Finally, I facilitated a panel of trained, transgender identified Gay Alliance Speakers Bureau members (Patti Jones, Jason Robert, Shauna O’Toole and Noah Wagoner) who connected with the audience on a personal level, sharing individual stories, experiences with hormone treatment and thoughts on making pharmacies and medical clinics safe and inclusive for all people.

Here are a few comments from participants of the March 11 presentation: “I didn’t expect a topic like this, but I’m very happy that this CE has taken the bull by its horns! Thanks to GAGV for being involved.”

“That was the most humbling and moving CE I have ever been to. I literally cried all the way home.”

A huge thank you goes out to Drs. Parkhill and Mathews, as well as Yantee Slobert, Director of the Office of Multicultural Affairs and Diversity Programs at SJFC, for stepping up to the plate on LGBT inclusion at St. John Fisher College and beyond and for supporting the work that we do at the Gay Alliance. ■

Be A Superhero!

The Gay Alliance Seeks Pride Volunteers

If you can help out with two hours of volunteering at any Pride event, please go to www.gayalliance.org/pride/volunteer Fill out the form.

That’s all there is to it!

Thank you.

GAGV youth doing a St. Patrick’s Day craft, led by Saundra from Rainbow SAGE (front center). On right, Ashley Powers, SAGE intern.

Photo: Jess Cohen

Allies welcome!

Seeking volunteers for Gay Pride Picnic 2012 Sunday, July 15, 2012 is THE day to look forward to at Genesee Valley Park, from 1 p.m. to 7 p.m.

Ensure your summer fun by getting involved now in the planning stages for the 2012 Gay Pride Picnic. We are planning a number of picnic events, and our favorite DJs will be back on tap again.

Rochester Pride is a major fundraising event for the Gay Alliance. Proceeds from Pride events financially support the Youth, Rochester SAGE, Education/Outreach, Health and Safety Programs of the GAGV, and The Empty Closet. The proceeds also cover the cost of the Pride events.

In order for the Picnic to run smoothly, we need approximately 90 volunteers to make a commitment of a minimum of two hours. Volunteers begin arriving at the Park at 7:30 a.m. the morning of the Picnic and do not leave until 8 p.m. or later in the evening. The tasks cover all aspects of the Picnic – set up, tear down, ticket sales and wristbanding, trash collection, and parking.

Volunteering is easy, and the more hands involved, the lighter the weight of responsibility on any one person. We need volunteers to make pre-picnic phone calls, write articles, and contact groups, as well as volunteers on the day of the picnic to carry out the tasks that make the picnic happen. Everyone who volunteers will have fun, meet new people and get a ticket to the Picnic. Thanks to those who have volunteered in the past. We welcome your help again.

To volunteer for the 2012 Pride Picnic, please go to http:// www.gayalliance.org/support/ volunteer and give us your name and contact info. Someone will contact you within a few days. ■

The Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley: is a non-profit agency, dedicated to cultivating a healthy, inclusive environment where lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans-gender (LGBT) people are safe, thriving and enjoying equal rights. We are a coalition of individuals and groups working to empower LGBT people, to affirm their identities, and to create an atmosphere where the diversity of our community can thrive both collectively and separately. We educate and advocate for civil rights for all and for the eradication of homophobia. • Address: 875 East Main Street, Rochester, New York 14605 Hours: Mon.-Fri., 9 am-5 pm • Phone: (585) 244-8640 • Fax: (585) 244-8246 • Web: www.gayalliance.org Board President: John Altieri • Executive Director: Sue Cowell • Education and Outreach Director: Scott Fearing Wellness and Safety: Kelly Clark • Outreach: Jeanne Gainsburg • Youth Program Director: Jessica Cohen The Empty Closet: Editor: Susan Jordan • Designer: Jim Anderson Phone: (585) 244-9030 • Fax: (585) 244-8246 • Advertising: (585) 244-9030 • E-mail: emptycloset@gagv.us

april 2012 • number 455 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

Program Notes Youth Update

The GaGa Gay Prom (“Born This Way”) will be Friday, May 18 from 7-11 p.m. at Artisan Works, 565 Blossom Rd. Tickets are $10 pre-sale and $15 at the door.

Tickets can be purchased at the Gay Alliance during Youth Drop-In and Teen Group. To purchase tickets at another time, please contact Jess to make arrangements. (244-8640, ext. 13; JessC@GayAlliance.org) Cash and checks only, please. Cost includes admission and light refreshments.

Day of Silence is Friday, April 20!

Join us in breaking the silence and celebrating LGBTQ youth voices! The event will be held at Tilt Nightclub & Ultralounge from 4-7 p.m., located at 444 Central Ave. in Rochester.

This space has been graciously donated by Tilt and all alcohol will be removed from the club. This event is ONLY open to youth ages 13-23! We are also incredibly lucky to have Tony-award winner Levi Kreis performing for us! Check out his amazing music at www.levikreis.com.

The rally, youth performance and Levi Kreis concert will run from 4-5 p.m. The Youth Dance will run from 5-7 p.m. and will include free depression screening, free/confidential HIV screening, pizza and soda! This event is FREE! A reminder that Drop-In runs from 2-6 p.m. Monday through Thursday for all LGBTQ youth and allies ages 13-23.

Teen Group (ages 13-18 only) runs from 6-7:30 every Tuesday! FREE tutoring and homework help are available during drop-in hours!

Also, we have some new games for our Wii! Come on by to play Wii Sports Resort or the Just Dance games! You can challenge Jess and other volunteers to a friendly dance battle! Who knows, their dance skill may just surprise you (probably not, but it will be fun to watch them try to move!).

Community Safety Alert: new danger in the parks

Gay and bi men are asked each year to avoid sexual activities in the parks, since there is danger of gay-bashing, pick up violence, theft and of course arrest. But this year there is a further danger.

Community Safety Director Kelly Clark says, “We have received a call from someone who was taken advantage of in a local park. A person was forced to give money to a male who photographed him and threatened blackmail.

As the weather is warming, this may continue. There are many reasons not to seek sex in the parks. This could have been a violent crime – people could be hurt. Not to mention the threat of arrest, fines and publicity.” ■

You’ve got our number(S) THE 2012 UNITED WAY DESIGNATION NUMBER 1135 SEFA NUMBER 03-7556 CFC NUMBER 93910 All Benefit the Gay Alliance Thank you!

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Alliance Youth

Speaking Engagements/ Tabling for March

The Gay Alliance offers Youth Services for Rochester area LGBTQ and allied youth ages 13-25

3/2&3 SpeakOUT Training at the Gay Alliance 3/5 LGBT Youth Issues at SOAR Youth Group (Monroe Co. Youth Bureau) 3/7 Empowering Ourselves to Speak Out at SUNY Geneseo 3/8 Rush-Henrietta School District Wellness Fair at the Expo Center 3/9 LGBT Global Rights at United Nations Association of Rochester 3/9 Managing Pride Volunteers at North East Regional Prides (NERP) Convention 3/10 Building Community at Pride at North East Regional Prides

(NERP) Convention 3/10 LGBT Health Month Fair at the Radisson Riverside Hotel 3/11 Overcoming Barriers to Healthcare in Transgender Patients at the

Wegmans School of Pharmacy at SJFC 3/12 Answering Difficult Questions at the Gay Alliance 3/14 LGBT 101 at Compeer 3/14 Practicing Your Personal Story at the Gay Alliance 3/16 Diversity Education at SUNY Morrisville 3/18 Intergenerational Panel at the First Universalist Church 3/20 LGBT Youth Issues at the National Council on Alcoholism & Drug Dependence 3/21 LGBT Youth Issues at St. Joseph’s Villa 3/22 Lion Ray Ernenwein Memorial Community Health, Nutrition and

Safety Fair at the Sweden/Clarkson Community Center 3/23 LGBT 101 at SUNY Morrisville 3/24 Getting Ready For Medicare, The ABCs of Life Insurance,

Mediation: What? Why? When?, What the ACLU Can do for

You, Domestic Violence Orders of Protection, Adoption Prep,

Anti-LGBT Housing Discrimination and Marriage Issues Update at

the LGBT Legal Expo 3/24 LGBT Bullying Issues at the MCC Bullying Conference 3/25 Practicing Your Personal Story at the Gay Alliance 3/26 SafeZone Training at Nazareth College 3/26 Who’s Who Panel at SJFC 3/27 Advanced SafeZone Training at Nazareth College 3/27 Advanced SafeZone Training at Nazareth College 3/27 Transgender Issues at First Unitarian Church 3/28 Intersex Issues at the Leadership Genesee Program 3/28 Transgender Youth Issues at East Rochester Elementary Schools 3/30 Safe and Inclusive Campuses at SUNY Morrisville 3/31 Safe School Summit at the Gay Alliance 3/31 LGBT Youth Issues at Threshold Youth Conference

Check out what’s happening at: www.gayalliance.org or contact: JessC@gagv.us Monday thru Thursday: Drop-in hours: 2-6pm Tuesday Teen Group: Ages 13-18: 6-7:30pm Special Interest: Transgender Youth, Arts/Crafts, Movies, Writing Special Events: Youth Dances, Day of Silence, Big Gay Prom, Pool Table, LGBTQ Youth Library, and Internet Access Fun, friendly, safe adults are needed to volunteer their time and talents, providing positive role models, maybe sharing a talent or skill.

Contact Jeanne Gainsburg, Outreach Coordinator for an application: jeanneg@gagv.us or 585-244-8640, ext. 14.

Evaluations of the Month “I was very impressed with this class. I would (and will) recommend this to all my coworkers. I would like to thank the instructor ten-fold! This class was very informative, very fun, and I am extremely glad I signed up.”

“I hope they know how influential they were. A lot of people, including myself, in that room couldn’t help but learn so much to take with them through life and at work.”

On-line Resource Center The Gay Alliance On-Line Resource Directory (GARD) The online community tool providing local, statewide and national resources, 24/7 at www.GayAlliance.org.

Library & Archives Internet Access?

The Gay Alliance Library has internet access available during library hours: Monday & Wednesday: 6-8pm

on

GARD

The computers are part of our David Bohnett Cyber Center

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the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 455 • april 2012

Resources

HIV testing on walk-in basis, Tuesdays, Wednesdays 1-4pm, provided through NYSDOH. Thursdays 1-4pm at Aenon Baptist Church, 175 Genesee St.

Check our monthly and ongoing calendar as well as the community section for more groups and events. For further information, call the Gay Alliance at 244-8640 or visit: www.gayalliance.org. And send us your information.

BISEXUALITY ONLINE

AMBI Los Angeles; American Institute of Bisexuality (Journal of Bisexuality); Bay Area Bisexual Network; Bi Café; Bi Definition: Milwaukee; BiNet USA; Bisexual Organizing Project (BOP); Biversity Boston; Boston Bisexual Women’s Network; ComBIne - Columbus, Ohio; Dallas/ Fort Worth Bi Net; Fenway Health’s Bi Health Program; Los Angeles Bi Task Force; New York Area Bisexual Network; Robyn Ochs’s site; Seattle Bisexual Women’s Network; The Bi Writers Association; The Bisexual Resource Center (email brc@biresource.net)

CULTURAL

Rochester Women’s Community Chorus 234-4441. (See Ongoing calendar).

deaf services

Advocacy for Abused Deaf Victims Mailing address: c/o ASADV, P.O. Box 20023, Rochester, NY 14602. 24-Hour Hotline: ASADVhope@gmail.com; VP: 866-936-8976; TTY/ FAX : 585-232-2854.

Lilac Rainbow Alliance for the Deaf (LRAD) Meets second Saturdays, 6-9pm. For location, information: rcoaster@rochester.rr.com Spectrum LGBTIQ & Straight Alliance RIT/NTID student group. <SpectrumComment@groups.facebook.com

family

CNY Fertility Center Integrative Fertility Care. Support meetings, webinars, workshops. Information: cbriel@cnyfertility.com; www.cnyhealingarts.com

Contact Information: Website: www.acRochester.org. Main Office: 259 Monroe Ave., Rochester, NY 14607; Main Phone: 585-545-7200, Health Services After Hours: 585-258-3363; Case Management After Hours (Lifeline): 585275-5151; Fax: 585-244-6456. Finger Lakes Office: 605 W. Washington St., Geneva, NY 14456, 315-781-6303. Southern Tier Office: 122 Liberty St. Box 624, Bath, NY 14810 607776-9166. The Health Outreach Project: 416 Central Ave., Rochester, NY 14605; 585-4545556.

Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley Referrals to physicians and service agencies.

(585) 244-8640; www.gayalliance.org.

Victory Alliance University of Rochester Medical Center. One of several research sites worldwide that comprise the HIV Vaccine Trials Network. Rochester site conducts research vaccine studies sponsored

by National Institutes of Health (NIH). 585-7562329; www.vaccineunit.org.

Threshold At The Community Place, 145 Parsells Ave., third floor, 585-454-7530. Provides confidential HIV, STD testing and General Health Care, ages 12-25. Sliding fee scale, no one denied, most insurances accepted. Mon., Wed., Fri. 9am-5pm; Tues., Thurs., 9am-7pm; Sat. 10am-2pm. www.ThresholdCenter.org Center for Health and Behavioral Training of Monroe County 853 Main St., Rochester 14611. Collaboration of Monroe County Health Department and U.R. Provides year-round training in prevention and management of STDs, HIV, TB and related issues, such as domestic violence and case management. (585)753-5382 v/tty.

Rochester Gay Moms’ Group Support group for lesbian mommies and wannabe mommies in Rochester and surrounding areas. Subscribe: RochesterGayMoms-subscribe@yahoogroups.com.

Planned Parenthood of the Rochester/ Syracuse Region 114 University Ave., Rochester, NY 14605; Tollfree Helpline: 1 866 600-6886. Offers confidential HIV testing and information. When you make your appointment, be sure to ask about our sliding scale fees. No one is turned away for lack of ability to pay.

Lesbian & Gay Family Building Project Headquartered in Binghamton and with a presence throughout Upstate NY, the Project is dedicated to helping LGBTQ people achieve their goals of building and sustaining healthy families. Claudia Stallman, Project Director, 124 Front St., Binghamton, NY 13905; 607-7244308; e-mail: LesGayFamBldg@aol.com. Web: www.PrideAndJoyFamilies.org.

Rochester Area Task Force on AIDS A collection of agencies providing a multiplicity of resources and services to the upstate New York community. Their offices are located through the Finger Lakes Health Systems Agency, which also provides medical literature and newspaper clippings, as well as demographic and statistical data for use in developing health care services. (585) 461-3520.

Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) PFLAG’s threefold mission: supporting parents and family members in coming out process; educating the community; advocating on behalf of LGBT family members. Regular meetings: Third Sunday of the month, Open Arms MCC, 740 Marshall Rd. 14624. 1-3pm. PFLAG@ gagv.us; 585-244-8640 x27.

MOCHA Center of Rochester Our mission is to improve health and wellness in communities of color through intervention and service, with emphasis on LGBTQ programming. Youth drop-in center, HIV testing, peer education, support groups, computer lab, referral services and more. 107 Liberty Pole Way (corner of Pleasant). (585) 420-1400.

Adoptive Parent Support Group Monthly potluck lunches. For information, location, call Shari, 350-2529.

Angel Food Ministry Box of fresh/frozen food for $30 in advance.

Menu changes monthly. For information and distribution sites, call 585 861-4815.

HIV/AIDS

Free testing for HIV exposure is available from New York State Department of Health: call Rochester Area Regional Hotline at (585) 423-8081, or 1 800 962-5063 for pay phones or calls outside Rochester. Deaf or hearing impaired people should call (585) 4238120 (TDD.) New Rapid HIV Testing now available in 30-40 minutes! Statewide information can be obtained by calling 1 800 541-AIDS. Other organizations which provide AIDS-related services are as follows: AIDS Care AIDS Care is the leading provider of HIV/AIDS services in Rochester and the Finger Lakes.

On-site services include HIV testing and limited STD screenings, Primary and HIV Specialty Medical Care, Pharmacy, and many more. AIDS Care satellite offices in Geneva and Bath. AIDS Care is also a leader in providing services and education to members of the LGBT community.

Monroe County Health Department at 855 W. Main St., offers testing and counseling for HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases. (585) 753-5481.

Strong Memorial Hospital provides a complete range of HIV medical care, including access to experimental treatment protocols, and HIV testing. Also provides individual and group psychotherapy. Training of health care professionals also available. Infectious Disease Clinic, (585) 275-0526. Department of Psychiatry, (585) 275-3379. AIDS Training Project, (585) 275-5693.

Planned Parenthood of Rochester and Genesee Valley Offers testing and information (585) 546 2595.

Rural HIV testing Anonymous and confidential, in Allegany, Livingston, Ontario, Schuyler, Seneca, Steuben, Wayne or Yates Counties, call 1 800 9625063.

Action Front Center (Action for a Better Community.) Provides HIV prevention education and case management services. Training and technical assistance to service providers. Resource library open to public. All services free and confidential. Multicultural and bilingual staff. 33 Chestnut St., second floor. Hours 8:30-5pm, Monday-Friday.

262-4330; fax 262-4572. Free anonymous

Anthony L. Jordan Health Center Prevention & Primary Care Program Provides Medical Case Management, Mental Health, Primary Care, HIV Counseling and Testing using the Orasure Rapid Test, Education presentations, and access to other Jordan services. Prevention & Primary Care is a walk-in program; no appointments necessary. Office hours: Mon.– Fri., 8:30am– 5 pm: extended hours on Monday until 8pm. (585) 423-2879; fax (585) 423-2876. Website: www.jordanhealth.org. For more information, call Program Director Patrick M. Trevor, (585) 423-2879.

CDC National STD and AIDS Hotline 1-800-CDC-INFO (800-232-4636) 24 hours a day. TTY service: 1-888-232-6348. E-mail address: cdcinfo@cdc.gov.

Fair Housing Enforcement Project of Monroe County 585-325-2500; 1-800-669-9777. Deals with housing discrimination on basis of race, orientation, HIV status, etc.

Public Interest Law Office of Rochester 80 St. Paul St., Suite 701. Free legal services to HIV positive persons, families. Spanish bilingual advocates available. All civil cases except divorce; no criminal cases. Ask to speak to someone in PILOR. 454-4060.

Evergreen Health Services, Buffalo Primary care, HIV and family care, HIV testing and counseling. (716) 847-0328 Westside Health Services Brown Square Health Center, 175 Lyell Ave. (254-6480); Woodward health Center, 480 Genesee St. (436-3040). HIV/AIDS services, support, more.

McCree McCuller Wellness Center at Unity Health’s Connection Clinic (585) 368-3200, 89 Genesee St., Bishop Kearney Bldg., 3rd floor. Full range of services, regardless of ability to pay. Caring, confidential and convenient.

Catholic Charities AIDS Services A multicultural and bi-lingual staff providing services to a diversity of people infected and affected with HIV. Coordinates HOPWA (Housing Opportunities for People with AIDS) short term emergency assistance with rent/mortgage/utility payments and limited subsidized housing. 1945 E. Ridge Rd., Suite 24, Rochester NY 14622. (585) 339-9800.

Huther Doyle 360 East Ave., Rochester 14604. Offers drug, alcohol prevention, education, treatment. Risk Reduction Plus Team offers services to HIV positive and those at risk through substance use. Programs include outreach, transitional case management, free cconfidential testing (OraQuick Rapid Testing). NYS Dep’t. of Health offers free on-site confidential and anonymous testing. (585)325-5100, M-F 8am-9pm, www. hutherdoyle.com.

Geneva Community Health 601 W. Washington St., Geneva. Provides HIV testing, HIV specialty and primary care for residents of Ontario and surrounding counties.

Mon.-Thurs. 9am-5pm; Fridays 9am-noon.

315-781-8448.

lgbt health

For a list of LGBT-friendly and competent health and human service providers in the Rochester and Finger Lakes area, visit the resource directory page(s) at www.everybodysgood.com.

Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley See www.gayalliance.org Resource Directory under “Health” for Gay Alliance referrals to physicians and service agencies.

TRANSGENDER

Rochester Trans Group Social/educational group for gender variant people and friends. Last Saturday, 3-5pm, GAGV Youth Center, first floor, 875 E. Main St. 244-8640. www.rnytg.org Youth Trans Group First Thurs. 6-7pm GAGV Youth Center, ages 13-23. jessc@gayalliance.org; 244-8640, x 13 Genesee Valley Gender Variants Thurs. 7-9pm, Equal Grounds, 750 South Ave. GVGenderVariants@yahoogroups.com Transgender online: Transenough.com; www.endtransdiscrimination.org; genderfork.com; www.transgendercare.com; International Foundation for Gender Education Gender Education and Advocacy http://www.gender.org/; FTM Information Network http://www.ftminfo.net/; Transgender at

Work http://www.tgender.net; PFLAG Transgender Network http://community.pflag.org/ page.aspx?pid=380; TransActive http://www. transactiveonline.org; The Transitional Male http://www.thetransitionalmale.com/; National Center for Transgender Equality http://transequality.org/; New York Association for Gender Rights Advocacy http://www.nyagra.com/; Transgender Aging Network http://forge-forward.org/aging/; Transgender Law Center http://transgenderlawcenter.org; Transgender Legal Defense and Education Fund http://transgenderlegal.org/; The Self Made Men http:// theselfmademen.webs.com/ (please send us your favorite sites/groups) Guys Night Out Social group for transmen. Third Saturdays, 1pm, Equal Grounds, 750 South Ave. tguysnightout@gmail.com

Women

Highland Hospital Breast Imaging Center 500 Red Creek Drive, Rochester 14623; 585487-3300. Specializing in breast health, diagnostic breast imaging and treatment and mammography outreach and education.

Breast Cancer Coalition of Rochester 840 University Ave.; 585-473-8177; www. bccr.org; email: info@bccr.org. Breast Cancer Coalition provides support services that include programs designed to help those coping with a recent breast cancer diagnosis and those coping with an advanced breast cancer diagnosis, such as the Advanced Breast Cancer Support Group to support women living with metastatic breast cancer. Information about breast cancer, lending library, a monthly educational program.

All BCCR programs, support services free.

Monroe County Women’s Health Partnership 111 Westfall Rd., Rochester NY 14692; (585) 274-6978. Comprehensive breast cancer screening services for uninsured and underinsured women.

Elizabeth Wende Breast Clinic 170 Sawgrass Drive. 442-8432. Dr. Wende Logan-Young and an all-woman staff provide mammograms.

Self Help for Women with Breast or Ovarian Cancer (SHARE) 1-866-53SHARE or 1-866-537-4273.

Alternatives for Battered Women 232-7353; TTY 232-1741. Shelter (women only), counseling. Lesbians, gay men welcome.

GAGV Anti Violence Project 585-244-8640 ext 19. For women and men.

Victim Resource Center of Wayne County Newark N.Y. Hotline 800-456-1172; office (315)331-1171; fax (315)331-1189.

Mary Magdalene House Women’s outreach center for HIV positive women and women at risk. 291 Lyell Ave. Open Mon-Fri. 6:30-9:30pm 458-5728.

Planned Parenthood of the Rochester/ Syracuse Region 114 University Ave., Rochester, NY 14605; Tollfree Helpline: 1-866-600-6886. Planned Parenthood has led the way in providing high quality, affordable reproductive health care since 1916. All services are confidential. Accept most insurances; including Medicaid. You may qualify for low- to no-cost family planning services. When you make your appointment, ask about our sliding scale fees. No one turned away for lack of ability to pay.

Women’s Resource Center YWCA, 175 N. Clinton Ave. 546-7740.

You’ve got our number(S) THE 2012 UNITED WAY DESIGNATION NUMBER 1135 SEFA NUMBER 03-7556 CFC NUMBER 93910 All Benefit the Gay Alliance Thank you!

april 2012 • number 455 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

Ongoing Calendar Monday

Rainbow SAGE Women’s Group Last Mondays, 11am-12:30 pm, GAGV Library, 1st floor next to Youth Center, 875 E. Main St. ebrophy@frontiernet.net Occupy Rochester M-F, 4-6 pm, at the Liberty Pole.

Born That Way Formerly 3rd Presbyterian LGBT Support Group. First, 3rd Mondays, 7:30-9:30pm, 34 Meigs St. Carol, 482-3832 or Kaara, 6547516.

Lilac Squares Gay Square Dance Group, Mondays, 7pm, 140 Alex Bar. To reserve space: 467-6456; bdaniels@frontiernet.net.

Free syphilis testing AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave., 5-8pm. 4422220.

Rochester Historical Bowling Society 7:15pm, Mondays. Clover Lanes, 2750 Monroe Ave. (Group is full.)

HIV Positive Men’s Support group Every Monday, 5pm, AIDS Care Center for Positive Living, 259 Monroe Ave. Gay Alliance Youth Drop-In Hours Mondays, Wednesdays, 2-6pm, Gay Alliance Youth Center, 875 E. Main St. Prince St. entrance, first floor. 244-8640, x 13.

Frontrunners/Frontwalkers Mondays, 6pm, George Eastman House parking lot. www.rochesterfrontrunners.org.

Steps Beyond Stems Crack Support Group, Mondays, 7-8pm, 289 Monroe Ave. Gay Alliance Library & Archives, David Bohnett Cyber Center Every Monday. 6-8pm. First floor, 875 E. Main St. 244-8640.

Equality Rochester 2nd Mondays, 7-8:30 pm, Equal=Grounds.

426-0862; annetischer1@gmail.com

Tuesday

Just Us Guys Gay men of all ages. 2nd Tuesdays, 6:30pm, AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave. 223-2629 Charlie’s Group 2nd Tuesdays. Monthly peer-facilitated support group for married men who have sex with men.

Confidential, free. For time, place: email: charlie@gayalliance.org.

MOCHA Youth Drop-In Tues.-Fri., 1-9pm, MOCHA Center, 107 Liberty Pole Way, 420-1400; 244-8640 MOCHA Hepatitis Clinic Free Hepatitis A & B vaccinations, third Tuesdays, 5:30-7pm, 107 Liberty Pole Way, 4201400 Women’s Community Chorus Rehearsals each Tuesday, 6:30-9pm, Downtown United Pres. Church, 121 N. Fitzhugh Street. 234-4441, www.therwcc.org Free HIV Testing 9am-7pm. AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave.

Go to: The Empty Closet pages at www.

GayAlliance.org to find the latest news, resources, events!

Friend Empty Closet News on Facebook and follow us on Twitter!

Wednesday Country Line Dancing/Two Stepping Every Wednesday, 140 Alex, 7pm. Lessons followed by dancing until 10pm, Beginners to advanced.

U.R. Pride Network 7:30pm, Gamble Room in Rush Rhees Library. urpride@gmail.com Rainbow SAGE Ruby Slippers Wednesdays, 5:45 pm, Callan-Harris Physical Therapy, 1328 Universty Ave. Gay Alliance Board of Directors Meets Third Wednesdays, 6pm, 875 E. Main St. 244-8640 New Freedom New Happiness AA Gay meeting, 7pm, Unitarian Church, 220 Winton Rd. Men and women. Open.

Support Group for Parents who have lost Children First, 3rd Wednesdays, 11am-12:30pm, Third Presbyterian Church, 4 Meigs St. Genesee Region Home Care. Free. 325-1880 COAP Come Out and Play. Wednesday game nights.

8-11 pm. Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave. 7pm, paulkaseman@gmail.com.

Rochester Rams General Meeting 2nd Wednesdays, 7:30pm, Bachelor Forum, 670 University Ave. www.rochesterrams.com Brothers Keeper Support group for men over 30. Third Wednesdays, 5:30-7:30pm, MOCHA Center, 107 Liberty Pole Way. 420-1400 HIV+ Mixed Men’s Group Wednesdays, 11:30 am-12:30 pm.

AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave. Gay Alliance Youth Drop-In Hours Mondays, Wednesdays, 3-7pm, Gay Alliance Youth Center, 875 E. Main St. Prince St. entrance, first floor. 244-8640 x 13.

Frontrunners/Frontwalkers 6pm, Eastman House parking lot. www.rochesterfrontrunners.org.

Gay Alliance Library & Archives, David Bohnett Cyber Center Every Wednesday. 6-8pm. First floor, 875 E. Main St. 244-8640.

Empire Bears Every Wednesday. 6pm dinner at The Wintonaire. www.empirebears.com

Thursday

Presbyterians for Lesbian and Gay Concerns 6:30pm, first Thursday. Ralph, 271-7649 Queer Radical Reading Group First and third Thursdays, 7pm, Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave. Pride at Work First Thursdays, 5:30pm. 167 Flanders St. off Thurston Rd. 426-0862.

GLOB&L (Gays & Lesbians of Bausch & Lomb).

Meets every third Thursday in Area 67 conference room at the Optic Center. Voice mail: 338-8977 Rochester Gay Men’s Chorus Downtown United Presbyterian Church, 121 N. Fitzhugh St. 6:30-9pm, 423-0650 Free confidential walk-in HIV testing Every Thursday night, 5-8pm, AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave. 442-2220 MOCHA/Gay Alliance Youth Trans Group First Thursdays, 5-7pm, Gay Alliance Youth Center, 875 E. Main St., 1st floor (Prince St. entrance). 244-8640 ext 13.

Second Thursdays Social/business networking, 5:30-7:30pm.

Changing venues. E-mail: fingerlakes@outandequal.org

FRIDAY

Gay Men's AA meeting Fridays, 7:30-8:30pm, Closed meeting.

Emmanuel Baptist Church, 815 Park Ave. GLBTQI Motorcycle Group Second Fridays, 5:30pm, Various locations.

RochesterGLBTIQbikers@yahoo.com; 4676456; bmdaniels@frontiernet.net.

L.O.R.A. Potluck & Games Night Fourth Fridays. GAGV Youth Center, 875 E.

33

Main St., 1st floor 6-9:30pm, 585-313-3037; E-mail: info@l-o-r-a.com. Facebook: http:// www.facebook.com/L.O.R.A.14464; Website: www.l-o-r-a.com Womyn’s Drum Circle Fourth Fridays. 6-9:30pm, GAGV Youth Center; E-mail: info@womynsdrumcircle.org; Website: www.womynsdrumcircle.org.

Rochester AA/NA Meetings

SATURDAY

Every week there are four regularly scheduled GLBTI AA and two NA meetings in Rochester.

Rochester Rams Bar Night Third Saturdays, 8pm-2am, Bachelor Forum, 670 University Ave. 271-6930 Rochester Trans Group Social/educational group for gender-variant people, friends. Last Saturdays, 3-5 pm, GAGV Youth Center, first floor, 875 E. Main St. Frontrunners/Frontwalkers 9am, George Eastman House parking lot.www. rochesterfrontrunners.org.

Empire Bears Potluck 2nd Saturdays, Gay Alliance Youth Center, 875 E. Main, first floor, Prince St. entrance. 6:30pm greet; 7pm dinner. Bring dish to pass. www. empirebears.org.

Cross Dresser Support Group First Saturdays, 6-9pm, call for location: 251-2132; RCDNET@hotmail.com Guys Night Out Third Saturdays. Social group for transguys.

1pm, Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave. tguysnightout@gmail.com.

Saturday Night Special Gay AA 7pm, Unitarian Church, 220 Winton Rd., S. Men and women. Open meeting.

Lilac Rainbow Alliance for the Deaf (LRAD) 2nd Saturdays, 6-9pm. rcoaster@rochester. rr.com Sophia’s Supper Club First and third Saturdays. http://www.inspiritual.biz/online-spiritual-evolution-gro/

Sunday

Parents Families & Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) Third Sundays, 1-3 pm. Open Arms MCC, 740 Marshall Rd. 244-8640 ext 27; PFLAG@gayalliance.org.

Gay Alliance Library & Archives, David Bohnett Cyber Center Sunday hours ended. First floor, 875 E. Main St. 244-8640.

Come Out Dancin’ First, Third Sundays. 3-5pm, Friends Meetinghouse, 84 Scio St., entry on Charlotte St. $5.

Rochester General Assembly Sundays, Flying Squirrel Community Center, 285 Clarissa St. Unity Fellowship Church Sundays, 1:30 pm, Lutheran Church of Peace, 125 Caroline St., 14620. 520-6188.

Dignity-Integrity 1st Sunday: 5pm Episcopal Eucharist with music; 2nd Sunday: 5pm Roman Catholic Liturgy of the Word with music; 3rd Sunday: 5pm Episcopal Eucharist (quiet); 4th Sunday: 5pm Prayers to start the week, followed by potluck supper.

Open Arms Metropolitan Community Church 740 Marshall Rd., Chili, 10:30am, 271-8478 Gay Men’s Alcoholics Anonymous St. Luke’s/St. Simon Cyrene Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St. 8:30pm, 232-6720, Weekly.

Closed meeting Rainbow SAGE First Sundays: Euchre Club, 3-6pm. Third Sundays, Potluck at First Universalist Church, 150 S. Clinton Ave., 4pm.

Men’s Cooking Group Third or fourth Sundays, 355-7664.

Civil Rights Front Every Tuesday, 5pm, Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave. http://www.civilrightsfront.wordpress.com

Tuesdays

Narcotics Anonymous 6-7:30pm. AIDS and Recovery 1124 Culver Road (Covenant United Methodist Church) This is an NA meeting that is open to all addicts who have a desire to stop using. Although it is not specifically a gay-oriented meeting, it is welcoming to people of all sexual orientations and gender identities, as well as to anyone who is affected by HIV and AIDS.

Wednesdays

New Freedom/New Happiness Group 7pm. First Unitarian Church, 220 S. Winton Rd. Bus riders: Take the last #18 University bus to 12 Corners. Use the stop just past the top of the hill at Hillside Ave. and before Highland Ave. Or take the #1 Park Ave. to the corner of East and Winton, then walk five minutes south (uphill) on Winton. This is an open discussion meeting. All issues – as they relate to our alcoholism/addiction and recovery – are fair game.

Fridays Gay Men’s 7:30pm. Immanuel Baptist Church, 815 Park Ave. • Closed meeting, restricted to alcoholics and addicts • Men’s meeting • Handicapped accessible This is a round-robin discussion meeting. If you are shy about meeting people or speaking up in a group, you will find this meeting particularly warm and inviting because everyone gets their turn to speak (or pass). As a result, this meeting often runs long, so plan on more than the usual hour.

Saturdays Saturday Night Special 7pm. First Unitarian Church, 220 S. Winton Rd. Bus riders: The #18 University Ave. bus does not go by the church on weekend evenings.

Take the #1 Park Ave. bus to the corner of East and Winton, then walk five minutes south (uphill) on Winton.

• Open meeting, all are welcome, “straight friendly” • Mixed men and women • Handicapped accessible, take elevator to basement Meeting begins with a speaker, followed by open discussion.

Sundays Step in the Right Direction 7:30-9pm. 1275 Spencerport Road (Trinity Alliance Church) This is an NA meeting that is open to all addicts who have a desire to stop using. Although it is not specifically a gay-oriented meeting, it is welcoming to people of all sexual orientations and gender identities. Each week features a reading from NA literature, followed by discussion.

Rochester Gay Men 8pm. St. Luke/St. Simon’s Episcopal Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh Street. Bus riders use the Fitzhugh Street stop on Main Street at the County Office Building and walk south one block.

• Closed meeting, restricted to alcoholics and addicts • Men’s meeting • NOT handicapped accessible Meeting begins with a speaker, followed by open discussion.

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the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 455 • april 2012

April

MONDAY 16

SUNDAY 1

SATURDAY 21

Floral presentation. The incredibly rare Stinking Corpse plant is flowering at Cornell. Join in as community members present corsages to area anti-gay politicians! looflirpa.com.

No Foolin’. ComeoutDancin’, Friends Meetinghouse, 84 Scio St. 3-5 pm. $5. comeoutdancin@gayalliance.org; 585-244-8640.

Dignity Integrity. Episcopal Mass/ Healing Service, with music. St. Luke/St. Simon Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St., 5 pm. http://www.di-rochester.org/) or DI Hotline at 585-234-5092.

THURSDAY 5

RGMC voice placements, first rehearsal. 6:30 pm, Downtown United Presbyterian Church, 121 N. Fitzhugh St. Info: www.thergmc.org, or (585) 423-0650.

FRIDAY 6

NTID/RIT Colorfest 2012. LGBT Deaf students’ conference. Opening ceremony, gallery exhibit, workshops, social, performing arts, more. Open to all. http:// www.rit.edu/spectrum.

Gallery at Equal=Grounds art show opening. “Seasons of Change” by Allison J. Nichols. 7-9 pm, 750 South Ave. Brian O’Neill art show opening.

“The Bridge Between Two Worlds.” Arts & Cultural Council, 277 N. Goodman, 5-9 pm. benefits AIDS Care.

Beth Bailey art show opening. Gallery Salon & Spa, 780 University Ave. 6:30-9:30 pm.

SATURDAY 7

ROMANS nude volleyball. 585-2814964 or email www.wnyromans.com.

SUNDAY 8

Dignity Integrity. Special Easter Sunday Service, with music; mass conducted

by Rev. Michael Hopkins. St. Luke/St. Simon Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St., 5 pm. http://www.di-rochester.org/) or DI Hotline at 585-234-5092.

Bullied: Teen Stories from Generation PRX at 9 pm on WXXI AM 1370 FM-HD 91.5-2.

Empty Closet deadline for May issue.

244-9030; susanj@gayalliance.org.

FRIDAY 20

Day of Silence rally, youth dance.

Tilt, 444 Central Ave., 4-7 pm. Levi Kreis performs. Youth 13-23 only. Info: Jess, 244-8640 ext 13; jessc@gayalliance.org.

Vagina Monologues. Proceeds to Rape Crisis and the women and girls of Haiti. Info at www.vday.com.

Dyke Picnic Kick Off Party @ 140 Alex. 6–10 pm, 140 Alexander St. Upstairs room.

SUNDAY 22

Dignity Integrity. Evening Prayer, followed by a Potluck Supper. St. Luke/ St. Simon Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St., 5 pm. http://www.di-rochester.org/) or DI Hotline at 585-234-5092.

THURSDAY 26

Community Place fundraiser.

Woodcliff Hotel & Spa 6 p.m. Live jazz, food, silent auction, reverse raffle. Tickets $100/person or $800 for table of eight.

585-224-2601 or e-mail kallen-caballero@communityplace.org

SATURDAY 28

Rochester Trans Group. “Summit” with transgender groups from Buffalo and WNY. 3-5:30 pm, GAGV Youth Center, first floor, 875 E. Main St. 244-8640.

Butch Femme Connection. Meet East Ridge Family Restaurant, E. Ridge Rd. in Irondequoit, 7 pm.

SUNDAY 29

Dignity Integrity. Evening Prayer, special program by Mary Ellen and Casey Lopata of Fortunate Families. St. Luke/St. Simon Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St., 5 pm. http://www.di-rochester.org/) or DI Hotline at 585-234-5092.

MONDAY 30

Beltain, May Eve. Ancient Celtic Fire Feast celebration of spring, sexuality, renewal of life force. Sacred tree: Willow. ■

Classifieds Classified ads are $5 for the first 30 words; each additional 10 words is another $1. We do not bill for classifieds, so please send or bring ad and payment to: The Empty Closet, 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500, Rochester, NY 14605. Paying by check: checks must be made out to Gay Alliance or GAGV. The deadline is the 15th of the month, for the following month’s issue. We cannot accept ads over the phone. Pay when you place your ad. We will accept only ads accompanied by name and phone number. Neither will be published, but we must be able to confirm placement. The Empty Closet is not responsible for financial loss or physical injury that may result from any contact with an advertiser. Advertisers must use their own box number, voice mail, e-mail or personal address/phone number.

PERSONALS

Politically progressive Lesbian Women Seniors interested in RPO concerts, Erie Canal walks, bird watching; news and current affairs conversation, call C at 585-732-7149.

SERVICES

Rochester’s Best Man to Man Rubdown. Unwind with this degreed, employed, fit, friendly, healthy, Italian GWM. Middle aged, 5’8”, 165 lbs., 32” waist, nonsmoker, d & d free, HIV negative. My 10-plus years experience guarantees your relaxation and satisfaction.

Hotel visit, in call in my home or out call in your residence. Reasonable rates. Discretion appreciated and practiced. Don’t delay, call me today at 585-773-2410 (cell) or 585-235-6688 (home) or e-mail me at: magichands@rochester.rr.com.

Interior painting/wall repair by John Walsh. 25 years experience, neat, clean, efficient. Booking now for spring/

Introducing a new comic feature

by Justin Hubbell

TUESDAY 10

Just Us Guys. Yoga, Tai Chi and Qi Gong basics. 6 pm, lower level conference room, AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave. Ron at 729-2259 or email rmatter1@rochester. rr.com.

THURSDAY 12

Out & Equal monthly Second Thursday social networking at the Bachelor Forum, 670 University Ave. 5:30-7:30 pm.

Out for Justice Workshop. Adoption and Custody, with Jennifer Gravitz, attorney. 6-8 pm, GAGV Youth Center, first floor, 875 E. Main St. 244-8640 ext 19; info@gayalliance.org.

FRIDAY 13

Kate Clinton “All Fracked Up” Tour. Presented by ImageOut. 8:30 pm, Hochstein Performance Hall. $30 in advance, $35 at door. Schmooze with Kate at VIP reception, 7 pm, $60. Tickets at www.imageout.org, Equal=Grounds, Outlandish.

SATURDAY 14

Butch Femme Connection. Meet 7 pm, Cracker Barrel, Hylan Drive in Henrietta.

Erotic Night at Equal=Grounds.

“Spring Fever.” 750 South Ave., 8 pm.

SUNDAY 15

ComeoutDancin’ at Friends Meetinghouse, 84 Scio St. 3 pm-5 pm. $5. comeoutdancin@gayalliance.org or call 585-244-8640.

Dignity Integrity. Quiet Episcopal Mass in the Chapel. St. Luke/St. Simon Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St., 5 pm. http:// www.di-rochester.org/) or DI Hotline at 585-234-5092.

summer. Call to arrange estimate. 585454-2808.

Martin Ippolito master electrician.

Electrical work, telephone jacks, cable TV, burglar alarm systems, paddle fans.

585-266-6337.

World renowned weddings. 42 years performing same sex commitments, now marriages (it’s about time!). Nancy BB Meyer minister, God is Love-Animals are Angels ministry. 585-733-6213.

Hate to paint or clean gutters? I have tall ladders! Dale’s Pleasure Painting and Gutter Cleaning has very reasonable rates for painting year-round and gutter cleaning in the spring or fall. 585-576-5042.

Email dale.furlong@yahoo.com.

Treat yourself to a very soothing, relaxing massage by a licensed massage therapist. Massage reduces stress and can enhance your wellbeing. Convenient central locations. Call John at 585-314-0197.

See more comics at justinhubbell.com

april 2012 • number 455 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

Bed & Breakfast

PFLAG meets the 3rd Sunday of each month. Meetings are at Open Arms Metropolitan Community Church, 740 Marshall Road, Rochester 14624 from 1 to 3pm.

Join us!

Questions? Call: 585-244-8640 and leave a message, or e-mail: pflag@gayalliance.org

Seeking

sex

in the park?

Need to Talk?

I work with individuals and couples on a variety of issues including anxiety, depression, relationship concerns, sexuality & coming out.

Maryellen Meleca, LCSW • 14 years experience 585-305-8457 • maryellen.meleca@gmail.com

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the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 455 • april 2012