Empty Closet, July 2012 by Out Alliance

The Empty Closet

tion s c e s 2 h o ly n!! b at m a p r i d e uper de!! s r u yo in si s i e guid

local, state and national news , newsmaker interviews , opinion, entertainment, columnists , event calendars , and health resource listings

number 458

a publication of the gay alliance of the genesee valley

JUly 2012

Partnerships The Gay Alliance appreciates the continuing partnership of businesses within our community who support our mission and vision. Gold:

Silver:

Rabbi David Horowitz. Photo: Gerry Szymanski

Rabbi speaks at opening of JCC exhibit on Nazi persecution of homosexuals

Bronze:

Champion:

Friend:

By Casey Sullivan On May 24, Rabbi David Horowitz, national president of PFLAG, was the keynote speaker at the Jewish Community Center’s opening night for the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum Traveling Exhibition: “Nazi Persecution of Homosexuals 1933-1945.” Horowitz became involved in the LGBT movement in 1990 after his daughter came out as a lesbian. In 1991, he marched for the first time, representing PFLAG in Columbus, Ohio’s gay pride parade. Scott Fearing, Education and Outreach Director for the Gay Alliance, challenged attendees to pin a pink triangle to their clothes in order to spark conversation among strangers they encounter about its significance. The Nazi Party used pink triangles to identify homosexuals in concentration camps. The pink triangles were created and donated by the Youth Program at the GAGV. Horowitz’s speech took a lighter tone than anticipated when broaching the subject matter, but his message was clear: the LGBT community needs support from its straight allies. “We’re not going to move forward... It’s not going to change until religious, straight people demand that change, and that means allies.” He compared the struggles that the LGBT community faces with the Civil Rights movement of the 1960s. “It was not until the white religious community got rid of its bigotry, got rid of its hatred, set aside their differences and sat in the Congress of the United States and said, ‘We demand the Civil Rights Act of 1964.’ Similarly, “[LGBT rights are] not going to happen unless we have the straight community and the religious community behind us.” He tells allies to begin their change in small steps. “You don’t have to march in the gay pride parade,” he noted. “You don’t have to go out and carry signs in front of churches. What you have to do, you have to be respectful of those who work around you that are gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender. And you’ve got to promise to do a very minimum number of things. Not a lot, OK? When a gay joke’s told, don’t (Rabbi continues page 6)

ROCHESTER PRIDE: Terry Hanney (above) created the Gay Alliance’s Peter Pan Crocodile puppet for last year’s Pride Parade. Photo: Kelli Ronald

Rochester celebrates its 24th Pride July 5-15 By Susan Jordan This month the Rochester LGBT community will celebrate Pride for the 24th time. The theme for this year is “Superheroes,” recognizing the heroic efforts of LGBT people to win full civil and human rights. (And have you heard that Marvel’s Green Lantern just came out, and Northstar marries his boyfriend in “Astonishing X Men #51”?) The 11 days of events (including an ImageOut film, a transgender open mic and a performance by Bread & Water Theatre) begin with a Gay Alliance event at

the Jewish Community Center (JCC), 1200 Edgewood Drive, on July 5. The next day, the Rainbow Flag will be raised at City Hall at 4 p.m., followed by the fun of “Super Sassy in the South Wedge”. Todd Plank will be 2012 Grand Marshal and Tom Ferrarese will be Honorary Grand Marshal. They will be “sashed” at the free Pride Power Mixer on July 13 at the Holiday Inn Airport. They will also be honored at the Pride Parade on July 14, when our Superheroes will be taking to the streets. Jessica Sutta will headline the

Festival after the Parade, which will be at the same location as last year – the parking lot behind the Auditorium Center, on College St. between Goodman and Prince. Big Wigs Aggy and Kasha will emcee, other glamorous queens will perform, Avenue Q puppets (from the Geva show) will take the stage and rumor has it that FuturPointe Dance Theatre will also have some surprises in store. For full information on all Pride 2012 events, and some Rochester Pride flashbacks, see the Pride Guide supplement in this issue. ■

Rochester PFLAG hosts conference here on July 15

just PFLAG members or chapters. We hope that the conference will provide individuals with relevant information that impacts their lives on a daily basis. We have some educational, legal and medical presenters who will address adolescent transgender issues, as well as discussing how the Dignity for all Students Act will affect our children in the New York State school systems. I feel we have a well rounded day conference that is informative, educational and supportive to parents and families that may have a child, sibling, or parent that they want to support, as well as providing accurate information on issues that pertain to their loved one. Rochester PFLAG is also happy to be a supporter of the (PFLAG continues page 6)

Save the Date

By Teri Boerner, Vice-President, Rochester PFLAG Rochester PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians & Gays) is very excited to be co-chairing a regional PFLAG conference here in Rochester on July 15. The conference will be held at the Jewish Community Center, 1200 Edgewood Drive, from 8:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. This is a great opportunity for our community and other PFLAG chapters to attend the conference, as well as take in the U.S. Holocaust Memorial Museum exhibit on “Nazi Persecution of Gays” at the Jewish Community Center. This conference is for all members of our community, not

Keep your calendars open on Thursday, August 2, at 11am. There will be a special press conference about two national recognitions of the Rochester LGBT Community. Location: AIDS Remembrance Garden at Highland Park.

Contents

Newsfronts................................... 4 Interview: Rev. Mulcahy................ 7 Making The Scene.....................10 Businesses: Colin Coffey............15 Columnists ................................22 Community ................................25 Entertainment: FuturPointe........27 Gay Alliance News.....................30 Calendar.....................................34 Classifieds..................................34 And your Pride Guide insert

FuturPointe Dance… see page 27

Proud Publisher of New York State’s Oldest Lgbt Publication

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 458 • JUly 2012

Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley

Perspectives From the Empty Closet Editor Susan Jordan

Gay Pride vs. the sin of pride LGBT people have been on a quest for centuries – a quest to find self-respect in the face of dehumanizing oppression. It is a source of pride to have come so far and not only survived, but often triumphed. In the past 40 years alone, LGBT Americans have witnessed sacrifice, courage and success. In 1969, the year of Stonewall, our love was “the love that dare not speak its name.” Over 40 years later, it’s the love that won’t shut up – and shouldn’t! It’s the hate-screamers and shameplacers who should shut their mouths, stop projecting their neurotic sexual obsessions onto “The Other” and start feeling shame for their abusive behavior. Not all of us have survived. We have our martyrs, like Harvey Milk, murdered for being an activist and a proud gay man. We have daily victims of hate violence. We have our sacrificed children – Matthew Shepard, Saskia Gunn, Fred Martinez, Tyler Clementi, Jamie Rodemeyer, Kenneth Weishuhn and thousands more. Not to mention all the adults who have died without ever being their authentic selves or finding the love they needed. Fortunately we also have the millions of survivors – our unsung heroes – the lesbians, gay men, bisexuals, transgender and genderqueer people of all backgrounds and ethnicities

From the Interim Executive Director Anne Wakeman

who live open lives of dignity and courage, in the face of discrimination, harassment and violence. Somehow most LGBT people manage to create stable, loving families and successful lives. And we’re not done yet. Here in New York State, years of effort by LGBT organizations and individuals, and our straight allies, brought about marriage equality one year ago. Now our focus is on winning transgender rights in New York and repealing DOMA’s national ban on recognition of our marriages. And we will do both of those things. Already some polls say a majority of Americans supports marriage equality and that number can only grow. The professional bigots who have politicized Christianity call being born gay a “sin.” But they themselves are committing the sin of pride. They want to take civil and human rights away from people unjustly persecuted for centuries. They want to deny recognition and respect to our families – in fact they want to destroy our families. They claim we are monsters incapable of love, in order to dehumanize and demonize us. Some of these “Christians” say they want to exterminate us. The bigots claim they’re superior to gay subhumans. They claim to be the only real followers of Jesus – the Jesus who said, “Even as ye have done unto the least of these, so have ye done unto me.” That seems pretty clear: when these bigots abuse gays, they are abusing Christ. And instead of following Jesus’ commands to be humble and to love without reservation, they arrogantly set themselves up to judge, condemn and punish. If that isn’t the sin of pride, what would be? Gay Pride is not about arrogance, or dehumanizing The Other. It’s about human love and resistance to oppression. It’s about survival. It’s about self-respect. Happy Pride, everyone! See you on July 14! ■

Many things

To say that the Gay Alliance and Rochester Pride Committees are in full swing as I write this on June 22 is an understatement …. Lord, such an understatement. The e-mails, logos, sponsors, budgets, reporting, media, tickets, flights, arrangements of all kinds are the makings of a Logistics textbook. But then again, it should be. Rochester’s Pride, which extends for 11 days from July 5-July 15 is the largest Pride Celebration in New York, north of New York City. And beyond being a time to celebrate, all these efforts help fulfill the Gay Alliance’s goals of Advocacy, Education and Community for LGBT & Ally Individuals in Upstate and Western New York. We all know about the Parade, Festival and Picnic, these aspects of Pride have been staples for years. It is our grand hope that each of these events, rain or shine will break attendance records, but we need your help. We need you to commit and buy tickets ahead of time, whether through the Gay Alliance or at Outlandish, Equal Grounds, Bachelor Forum or Parkleigh. But also talk among your friends, family and co-workers about attending this extraordinary series of events held in our City. In addition to the well known last weekend days, there is so much more that will intrigue, provoke thoughts and discussions among ourselves and our supportive straight allies.

Name Address City/State/Zip

GARD

Phone

E-mail

r ster p

The Empty Closet • Youth Program • Rochester Pride Education Program & Speakers Bureau Library and Archives Gay Alliance Resource Directory Shoulders to Stand On • Rainbow SAGE • SafeZone The Gay Alliance plays a central role in advocating for the fair and equal treatment of all people, regardless of their sexual orientation, gender identity or gender expression. www.GayAlliance.org

Rochester Pride

Day 1) Thursday, July 5 at the Jewish Community Center. The screening of “Beyond Gay” and reminds us why the celebration and sharing of Pride is so important by contrasting LGBT lives outside the U.S. Jim Mulcahy, former pastor at Open Arms MCC, will be the guest speaker sharing his experiences. Day 2) Friday, July 6 is the Flag Raising at Rochester’s City Hall. Experience the Rainbow Flag unfurling across two stories in the atrium and the celebratory guests that welcome our Pride. Afterwards, it’s over to Sassy in the Southwedge, where merchants bring out the specials to get the week started. Day 3) Saturday, July 7 – Head to Seabreeze on your own for some fun in the sun. Day 4) Sunday, July 8 is our Tea Dance with arrangements finalizing. Keep eyes open to the website. Day 5) Monday, July 9 includes our Youth Dance & Drag Show at Tilt. Christ Church is presenting the dramatic readings of Rochester’s Lambda Project for the adults. Day 6) Tuesday, July 10 is Pride Movie Night at the Third Presbyterian Church. Day 7) Wednesday, July 11 is a new trans event, “The Good, The Bad & The Funny” at Equal Grounds Day 8) Thursday, July 12 is the Out & Equal Networking Event at Boulder Coffee & Napa Pizzeria. Afterwards, head to the Cinema Theatre as ImageOUT has their Summer Mayhem screening. Day 9) Friday, July 13 is a day for great luck as the Holiday Inn Airport kicks off the BIG celebration with the Pride Power Mixer. Day 10) Saturday, July 14 the Family event at Rochester Museum & Science Center. Days 10 and 11) Saturday & Sunday, July 14 & 15 are the Parade, Festival and the Picnic. Yes, the makings of a logistics textbook, but let’s have fun, be safe and extend and build Community. ■

Membership levels: ❏ $30-99 Advocate ❏ $100-999 Champion ❏ $1,000-4,999 Triangle Club ❏ $5,000+ Stonewall ❏ Enclosed is my check in the amount of _________ (check #______) Please charge my credit card in the amount of: __________ To: ❏ American Express, ❏ Discover, ❏ MasterCard, ❏ Visa Credit card # _____________________________ Exp. Date: _______ ❏ I would be proud to have my donation publicly acknowledged. ❏ Please provide me Rainbow SAGE Program (age 50+) News Benefits include: a subscription to The Empty Closet mailed to home or work, plus privileges at each level. Phone: 585 244-8640 or mail to: Gay Alliance, 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500, Rochester, New York 14605. Home delivery of the Empty Closet is free with your annual membership in the Gay Alliance. 7/12

for Many people

The Empty Closet is published by the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500 Rochester, New York 14605 © 2011, All rights reserved. Editor-in-Chief: Susan Jordan Staff Reporter: Ove Overmyer Graphic Design: Jim Anderson Advertising policy: The Empty Closet does not print advertisements that contain nude drawings or photographs, nor does it print advertising that states that the person pictured in the ad is for sale, or that you will “get” that particular person if you patronize the establishment advertised. Advertisements that are explicitly racist, sexist, ageist, ableist or homophobic will be refused; advertisements from organizations that are sexist, racist, ageist, ableist or anti-gay will also be refused. All political advertisements must contain information about who placed them and a method of contact. Additionally, The Empty Closet does not print negative or “attack” advertisements, whether they relate to a product or politics and no matter in whose interest the ad is being produced. A negative advertisement is defined as one that focuses upon a rival product, or in the political area, a rival election candidate or party, in order to point out supposed flaws and to persuade the public not to buy it (or vote for him or her). The Empty Closet maintains, within legal boundaries, neutrality regarding products, political candidates and parties. However, “attack” ads that fail to provide undisputable evidence that the information in the ad is true do not further in any way the objectives and policies of the Gay Alliance or The Empty Closet, including the primary tenet that The Empty Closet’s purpose is to inform the Rochester gay community and to provide an impartial forum for ideas. Submissions: For publication, submit news items, ads, photos, letters, stories, poetry, ads, photographs or art by mail or in person to The Empty Closet office by the 15th of the month. Design services for non-camera ready ads are available for a fee. (www.emptycloset@ gagv.us) Publication Information: The Empty Closet is published 11 times a year (December and January combined) by The Empty Closet Press for the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley, Inc. Approximately 5000 copies of each issue are distributed during the first week of the month, some by mail in a plain sealed envelope. The publication of the name or photograph of any person or organization in articles is not an indication of the sexual or affectional orientation of that person or the members of that organization. For further information, please write to The Empty Closet, 875 E. Main St., Rochester NY. 14605, call (585) 244-9030 or e-mail emptycloset@gagv.us. The Empty Closet is the official publication of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley, Inc., as stated in the bylaws of that organization. Its purpose is to inform the Rochester gay community about local and national gay-related news and events; to provide a forum for ideas and creative work from the local gay community; to help promote leadership within the community, and to be a part of a national network of lesbian and gay publications that exchange ideas and seek to educate. Part of our purpose is to maintain a middle position with respect to the entire community. We must be careful to present all viewpoints in a way that takes into consideration the views of all – women, men, people of color, young and old, and those from various walks of life. The opinions of columnists, editorial writers and other contributing writers are their own and do not necessarily reflect the collective attitude of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley or The Empty Closet. The Empty Closet shall not be liable for any loss or expense that results from the publication (whether correctly or incorrectly) or omission of an ad. In the event of non-payment, your account may be assigned to a collection agency or an attorney, and will be liable for the charges paid by us to such collection agency or attorney. Letters to the editor: The opinions of columnists, editorial writers and other contributing writers are their own and do not necessarily reflect the collective attitude of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley or The Empty Closet. We will print letters at the editor’s discretion and on a space available basis. Only one letter by the same writer in a six-month period is allowed. We will not print personal attacks on individuals, nor will we be a forum for ongoing disputes between individuals. We reserve the right to edit for space and clarity. We will print anonymous letters if the name and phone number are provided to the Editor; confidentiality will be respected. Submissions are due by the 15th of the month at: The Empty Closet, 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500, Rochester, NY 14605; e-mail: emptycloset@gagv. us. Online edition of EC available at www. gayalliance.org.

JUly 2012 • number 458 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

NewsFronts Local and State coming learning environments for all students. This bill’s passage by both houses of the legislature today is another critical step in making sure that students are protected from harm by mandating that all incidents be immediately reported to the school principal for investigation and all students required to learn about safe and responsible use of the internet as part of the school’s character education which was created by the Dignity for All Student’s Act. Liza Friedlander

Lesbian assaulted in restaurant wins $25,000 lawsuit Lambda Legal reports a positive resolution on June 13 in the case of a Queens restaurant patron who was attacked by the manager in an anti-gay assault. Via press release: “I was attacked and threatened by people yelling terrible anti-LGBT slurs, throwing things at me and threatening to sexually assault me,” said Lambda Legal client Liza Friedlander. “On that day, I felt helpless, humiliated and frightened, but today I’m so proud that I stood up and did something about it. No one should have to go through a nightmare like that.” On Sept. 18, 2010, Liza Friedlander and two friends went to Sizzler Restaurant 0489 in Forest Hills, Queens for the breakfast buffet. What was intended as a relaxing, enjoyable meal turned into a horrifying ordeal of discrimination, violence and degradation. Defendant Edgar Orellana, in front of other restaurant patrons, shoved Ms. Friedlander in the chest, causing her to fall backward, and kicked her while yelling for her to get out of the restaurant and calling her a “fucking dyke.” The restaurant chain paid Freidlander $25,000.

NYS Senate and Assembly pass cyberbullying law On June 18, the New York State Senate, under the leadership of Senate Majority Leader Dean Skelos, and the State Assembly, under the leadership of Speaker Sheldon Silver, and with the tireless advocacy of Senator Steve Saland and Assemblymember Danny O’Donnell, passed legislation that will help protect children from bullying and harassment online. The internet provides a wealth of information and opportunities, but it can also be a very dangerous place, particularly for children who don’t fit in, as is the case with many LGBT youth. Empire State Pride Agenda Executive Director Lynn Faria said, “This cyberbullying legislation, coupled with the July 1, 2012 implementation of the Dignity for All Students Act, are important to creating safe, wel-

Bronson sponsors bill for domestic violence victims The Assembly has passed a bill sponsored by Assembly Member Harry Bronson (D-Rochester/Chili/Riga/Rush/ Wheatland) that will enhance protections for victims of domestic violence (A.10624). The bill will better protect victims of domestic violence and crack down on repeat offenders. The legislation establishes the crime of “Aggravated Family Offense” as a class E felony to ensure that defendants with a history of domestic violence who repeatedly commit misdemeanor offenses are prosecuted as felons. The legislation also establishes a new class A misdemeanor of “Aggravated Harassment in the Second Degree” when a person causes physical injury to another person or to a family or household member of the person. The legislation also allows courts to consider prior violations of an order of protection and access to firearms when determining the defendant’s bail. Currently, when offenders repeatedly commit crimes that are considered low level, their punishments do not get harsher, allowing them to continue to harass their victims. This legislation creates a felony-level offense that will help to prosecute cases effectively, reduce future incidents, and protect victims. Additionally, the multifaceted legislation will require the Office for the Prevention of Domestic Violence (OPDV) to establish a domestic violence fatality review team to examine factors involved in domestic violence deaths and near-deaths; strengthen and broaden the Address Confidentiality Program (ACP), which allows victims attempting to escape from actual or threatened domestic violence to establish new mailing addresses with the secretary of state in order to prevent abusers from finding them; permit victims of domestic violence to obtain information from their health insurance companies by alternative means or at alternative locations, prohibit insurers from publicly disclosing the address, telephone number or other information without direct consent from the policyholder and prohibit a person who is the subject of an order of protection associated with a deceased person, or who has been charged with causing the death of the deceased person, from having

control of the disposition of the deceased’s remains. Harry Bronson commented, “Earlier this year, the Assembly passed a package of bills to increase protections for victims of domestic violence and passed a resolution that urged the New York State congressional delegation to reauthorize the federal Violence Against Women Act. “Making sure that victims of domestic violence have the protections they deserve and that offenders get the penalties they deserve will continue to be my focus. I am pleased the Senate and the governor joined in supporting this legislation. It sends the message that New York will not tolerate domestic violence.”

We Are One: Gays join Puerto Rican Parade July 21 The Gay Alliance is helping to create a coalition of LGBT people to march in the Puerto Rico Day Parade this month. Said Speakers Bureau volunteer Wanda Martinez, “‘We Are One’ (Somos Unos): Rochester’s Gay Alliance and LGBT communities are marching in the Puerto Rican Parade on July 21. Join us in marching and show your pride as ‘We Are One’ diverse Rochester.” Anne Wakeman, Interim Executive Director of the Gay Alliance, said, “The Gay Alliance is thrilled to be marching in the 2012 Puerto Rican Parade! ‘Somos Unos’ indeed. We are one in our Rochester Community. We are one in celebrating our respective heritages. We are one in standing up for those that are Hispanic/Latino and Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual or Transgender. It is our privilege to join in the biggest celebration of Hispanic and Latino culture in Rochester. For the last 40 years, the Gay Alliance has provided advocacy, education and community for LGBT individuals and straight allies.” The Parade will line up at the Liberty Pole at 10 a.m. and proceed to Frontier Field.

NYS Sen. Tom Duane won’t seek re-election Thomas K. Duane, the out gay Chelsea Democrat first elected to the New York State Senate in 1998, announced his decision not to seek reelection this November on June 4. Duane is 57. Duane, the nation’s only openly gay and openly HIVpositive state legislator, has announced his retirement from politics, opening up the seat in a district that stretches from the Upper West Side to Greenwich Village, and across to the East Village. Mr. Duane told Gay City News that he had tired of traveling between the city and Albany, as he has for nearly 14 years and that he was eager to try something new. “It’s not that Albany isn’t a lovely place, but it’s not home,” he said. “I always knew that I was going to have another chapter in my life, and it’s time for me to start that new chapter.” The New York Times speculated about Duane’s replacement: “With Republicans now holding a slim majority in the Senate, Mr. Duane’s departure is

Tom Duane

unlikely to alter Albany’s balance of power, since whoever wins the Democratic primary on Sept. 13 will be an overwhelming favorite in November. The shortlist could include State Assembly members Deborah J. Glick and Brian Kavanaugh. Other possibilities are Brad Hoylman and Corey Johnson, the chairmen of Community Boards 2 and 4.” Duane would like to hand over to Hoylman, GCN said. Assembly Member Richard N. Gottfried commented, “Tom Duane leaves very big shoes to fill. Tom has been an extraordinary legislator - smart, tireless, and fiercely dedicated to human rights and social justice. He has been extraordinarily effective in protecting tenants, preserving affordable housing, protecting the community from excessive development, strengthening LGBT rights, and ensuring access to health care for everyone. “Tom has been a great partner, and his staff has been wonderful to work with over the years. I will miss him as a legislative colleague, but continue to value him as a friend, a constituent and a leader on issues that matter. Whatever he does next, I hope it’s something where we continue to work together.” Assembly Member Gottfried and Sen. Duane represent overlapping districts. Mr. Gottfried chairs the Assembly Health Committee, and Senator Duane is the Ranking Minority Member of the Senate Health Committee.

NYC reforms police guidelines on transgender NY City Council Speaker Christine C. Quinn, Police Commissioner Raymond W. Kelly, Council members and the NYPD LGBT Advisory Panel on June 12 announced reforms to the New York City Police Department’s (NYPD) Patrol Guide to ensure respectful treatment of gender non-conforming New Yorkers by the police. The NYPD’s Patrol Guide is

3 the procedural rulebook issued to officers and outlines regulations for addressing the public. The changes to the NYPD Patrol Guide were announced at the New York City Council’s LGBT Pride Event at the Great Hall at Cooper Union. The new Patrol Guide formally outlines that discrimination or harassment based on actual or perceived gender is prohibited by City law. “The NYPD’s new Patrol Guide makes it clear that all people must be treated with respect,” said Speaker Christine C. Quinn, who is an out lesbian. “I applaud Commissioner Kelly for working closely with the City Council and the LGBT community to create respectful, inclusive guidelines that are appropriate for transgender New Yorkers, and I thank the NYPD LGBT Advisory Panel for their work to make these changes.” “The changes to the Patrol Guide are significant, affecting more than 12 separate Patrol Guide provisions,” said New York Police Department Commissioner Raymond W. Kelly. “The changes range from establishing search procedures for transgender arrestees to requiring officers to address arrestees by their preferred name. Senior members of my staff worked closely with representatives from the LGBT community to draft these changes, and I applaud their work.” The Patrol Guide updates create a written policy for the NYPD to follow when addressing, processing, searching and housing gender non-conforming people. “Advocates from the LGBT community who were involved in drafting and negotiating these proposed changes to the Patrol Guide look forward to working with the NYPD on training and enforcement that will ensure that the Patrol Guidelines are implemented, ” said New York City Anti-Violence Project and NYPD LGBT Advisory Panel Member Sharon Stapel. “These crucial changes to the Patrol Guide are a major step forward in improving conditions for transgender and gender non-conforming people in New York City,” said New York City LGBT Center Director of Community Services and NYPD LGBT Advisory Panel Member Carrie Davis. “The immense efforts from all involved have resulted in a stronger relationship between the NYPD and organizations that advocate on behalf of the LGBT community.” “I am proud and happy of the work to change the culture between the NYPD and trans women,” said NYPD LGBT (State/Local continues page 6)

Thank You Donors The Gay Alliance thanks all 91 of its gracious donors in the last month, including Louise Epstein, Doreen Messino in honor of Salvatore Ardillo, Erika Herr and Sylvia Dentinger – who noted they were proud to be acknowledged. We also are so grateful for your wonderful support of the June Tea Dance in honor of Evelyn Bailey and The Shoulders To Stand On Project, hosted by Tim Tompkins at ONE Restaurant.

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 458 • JUly 2012

NewsFronts national and international Appeals Court won’t review Prop 8; Supreme Court may be next In an announcement that could either lead to a return to marriage equality in California or a historic case before the U.S. Supreme Court, on June 5 the full U.S. Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit declined to review a February decision of that court ruling that California’s constitutional amendment stripping loving, committed gay and lesbian couples of marriage violates the U.S. Constitution. With this announcement, the proponents of Prop 8 are now likely to seek review by the U.S. Supreme Court and the Ninth Circuit is likely to continue the stay of its decision until that process is complete. In the event that the Supreme Court decides not to hear the case, the lower court ruling would stand and gay and lesbian couples would again be able to marry in California. Human Rights Campaign President Joe Solmonese released the following statement: “Once again, a federal court has affirmed that the cherished guarantees of our Constitution are there to protect all Americans – including lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people. For over three years, the plaintiffs, the American Foundation for Equal Rights, and attorneys Ted Olson and David Boies have shown tremendous fortitude and perseverance in their fight for marriage equality. With today’s announcement, we are one step closer to ensuring that gay and lesbian Californians – and, one day, our entire community nationwide – are able to join the institution of marriage and have their love and commitment respected equally. “Today’s announcement is another significant step on a path that we all know leads to equality. While the U.S. Supreme Court may ultimately decide the outcome of this case, we must all continue to walk that path – in this case and other courtrooms, in legislatures, at ballot boxes and at kitchen table – until all LGBT people are fully and equally part of the American community.” In response to a 2008 decision by the California Supreme Court ending marriage discrimination in the state, antiequality forces succeeded in placing a constitutional amendment on the November ballot. Despite the fact that over 18,000 same-sex couples had married, California voters adopted the amendment, known as Proposition 8. After the California Supreme Court determined in 2009 that the adoption of Prop 8 did

not itself violate the California Constitution, two plaintiff couples -- Kris Perry and Sandy Stier and Paul Katami and Jeff Zarrillo – filed suit against the State of California in federal court, represented by attorneys Ted Olson and David Boies and supported by the American Foundation for Equal Rights, an organization co-founded by incoming HRC President Chad Griffin. The proponents of Prop 8 intervened in the case to defend the constitutionality of the amendment. Judge Vaughn Walker, then-chief judge of the U.S. District Court for the Northern District of California, held a historic trial in January 2010, in which the plaintiffs presented substantial testimony and evidence to show that Prop 8’s only purpose is to discriminate against same-sex couples. In August 2010, in a historic decision, he concluded Prop 8 is unconstitutional. That ruling was appealed to a three-judge panel of the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit, which affirmed Walker’s conclusion that Prop 8 in unconstitutional in February 2012, but stayed its decision as the proponents sought a rehearing. American Foundation for Equal Rights Today’s order is yet another federal court victory for loving, committed gay and lesbian couples in California and around the nation,” said AFER co-founder Chad Griffin. “The final chapter of the Proposition 8 case has now begun. Should the United States Supreme Court decide to review the Ninth Circuit’s decision in our case, I am confident that the Justices will stand on the side of fairness and equality.” On Feb. 7, 2012, a three-judge panel of the Ninth Circuit concluded that Proposition 8 violates the Equal Protection Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution. The Ninth Circuit panel majority held: “Proposition 8 serves no purpose, and has no effect, other than to lessen the status and human dignity of gays and lesbians in California, and to officially reclassify their relationships and families as inferior to those of opposite-sex couples. The Constitution simply does not allow for laws of this sort.” Marriage Equality USA The momentum for the freedom to marry seems unstoppable. Three weeks ago, the President of the United States announced his support for marriage equality. Last week, the 1st Circuit Federal Court of Appeals held that the so-called Defense of Marriage Act is unconstitu-

tional. And today, the 9th Circuit Federal Court of Appeals upheld its earlier decision striking down Proposition 8. Nationwide polls have shown majority support for the freedom to marry for the last two years, and Californians now favor marriage equality by a 59 – 34 percent margin, according to the latest polling. “Earlier this year, a 3-judge panel of the Ninth Circuit held that Proposition 8’s targeting lesbian and gay people and taking away their freedom to marry violated the equality and fairness guarantees of the United States Constitution. Today, a majority of the Court agreed, by declining to revisit the ruling. If the United States Supreme Court also declines to review the case, loving, committed lesbian and gay couples could be able to marry again in California later this year or early next year,” said John Lewis, Marriage Equality USA’s Legal Director. Thom Watson and Jeff Tabaco of Daly City have been waiting to marry since Prop 8 was passed almost four years ago. “This month Jeff and I begin our 10th year together as a couple,” noted Watson. “When Judge Vaughn Walker heard closing arguments two years ago this month, he quipped, ‘June is, after all, the month for weddings,’” stated Tabaco. “It would be wonderful if this June marked the final decision in the case, and Thom and I could celebrate our 10th anniversary by getting legally married.” “A few days ago First Lady Michelle Obama stated, ‘In a country where we teach our children that everyone is equal under the law, discriminating against same-sex couples just isn’t right.’ We applaud our courts’ standing up for what’s fair and right and urge them to continue to do so,” concluded Watson. National Center for Lesbian Rights “Today’s refusal by the Ninth Circuit to grant further review is a testament to the meticulous and well-reasoned opinion originally issued by the Court. While the supporters of Proposition 8 will now seek review by the U.S. Supreme Court, there is no doubt that they are on the wrong side of history. Excluding samesex couples from the right to marry runs counter to our highest ideals of equality and fairness.”

“President Obama has absolutely taken the right step today in extending the American dream to undocumented youth across this country,” said Robin McGehee, executive director of GetEQUAL. “We’re thrilled that the president has stood with DREAMers across the U.S. today and has finally extended the ‘hope and change’ to them that he promised in 2008. And as the president hosts LGBT advocates at the White House today to celebrate LGBT Pride Month, we call on President Obama to issue the Executive Order that we have been calling for since the beginning of the year -- an Executive Order to bar discrimination by federal contractors based on sexual orientation and gender identity.” “Today’s news is truly a dream come true for me and for so many other DREAMers across the country,” said Felipe Matos, GetEQUAL’s national field director and an undocumented gay man. “The DREAM movement really saved my life when I had lost hope in being able to stay in the country that I love -and today’s announcement is the result of hard work, good organizing, and bold action from my friends and family across this country. I’m still reeling from the news and overjoyed by the announcement -- but my heart has just enough room in it for another Executive Order. It’s my hope that President Obama will make today especially historic by signing another Executive Order -- one that will guarantee that I have the right to work freely and openly as an immigrant, but also as a gay American.” Over the past few months, GetEQUAL has pressured the president directly and indirectly to sign such an Executive Order, staging a direct action at the White House Easter Egg Roll involving a gay couple and their daughter who would be directly impacted by such an executive action, and visiting Obama for America campaign offices across the country to pressure campaign staff and volunteers. Over 1000 volunteers signed up to take action at their local OFA office.

President signs DREAM order; GetEqual hails support for youth

Timothy Kincaid posted on Box Turtle Bulletin on June 12: Split, on the beautiful Adriatic coast in Croatia, had a Pride Parade over the weekend. Riot police watched … as several hundred people, including some government ministers, marched unhindered through the Croatian town of Split… many carrying flags and banners reading “Gay is OK” and “We are all equal.” As treatment of a country’s gay citizens is being seen more and more as a defining characteristic for countries with European sensibilities, and as Croatia wishes to join the European Union next year, the government viewed a safe and successful Pride Parade as being politically necessary. They were serious. The crowd walked along a route that

On June 15, the White House announced that President Barack Obama has signed an Executive Order to stop deportations of and grant work permits to undocumented young people who would have been eligible for the proposed 2010 legislation known as the DREAM Act. GetEQUAL -- a national civil rights organization working toward the full equality of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) Americans -- praises that step by the White House to protect the hard-working young Americans who have fought for the DREAM Act over the past 10 years.

Croatia manages a safe, successful Pride Parade

JUly 2012 • number 458 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet was fenced off by the police, while a helicopter flew overhead and a water cannon was parked nearby. The police were delighted to report no incidents of violence and the Minister for Foreign Affairs made statements in support of the event.

Yet another federal judge rules DOMA unconstitutional A federal judge ruled June 6 that a critical section of the so-called “Defense of Marriage Act” (DOMA) unconstitutionally discriminates against married same-sex couples. The decision joins those of three other federal courts that have struck down DOMA under the Constitution. The statute had been challenged by Edith “Edie” Windsor, who sued the government for failing to recognize her marriage to her partner Thea Spyer, after Spyer’s death in 2009. Windsor and Spyer were married in Canada in 2007, and were considered married by their home state of New York. “Thea and I shared our lives together for 44 years, and I miss her each and every day,” said Windsor. “It’s thrilling to have a court finally recognize how unfair it is for the government to have treated us as though we were strangers.” In her lawsuit, Windsor argues that DOMA violates the equal protection guarantee of the U.S. Constitution because it requires the government to treat same-sex couples who are legally married as though they were not, in fact, married. Windsor’s lawsuit was filed by the law firm of Paul, Weiss, Rifkind, Wharton & Garrison LLP, the American Civil Liberties Union and the New York Civil Liberties Union. The Obama administration declined to defend the statute in court in February 2011, so the House of Representatives’ Bipartisan Legal Advisory Group, under the orders of Republican Speaker John Boehner, appointed an attorney to represent the government in the case – using gay taxpayers money to attack their own civil rights. When Thea Spyer died in 2009, she left all of her property to Windsor, including the apartment they shared. Because they were married, Spyer’s estate normally would have passed to her spouse without any estate tax. But because DOMA prevents recognition of the otherwise valid marriages of same-sex couples, Windsor had to pay more than $363,000 in federal estate taxes. “This decision adds to what has become an avalanche of decisions that DOMA can’t survive even the lowest level of scrutiny by the courts,” said James Esseks, Director of the ACLU Lesbian Gay Bisexual and Transgender Project. Windsor, a senior computer systems programmer, and Spyer, a clinical psychologist, met in the early 1960s, and lived together for more than four decades in Greenwich Village. Despite not being able to get legally married, they were engaged to each other in 1967. Spyer was diag-

nosed with multiple sclerosis, and Windsor helped her through her long battle with the disease. They were finally legally married in May 2007. Roberta A. Kaplan, an attorney for Windsor, added, “Although we expect the attorneys for the House of Representatives to appeal today’s decision, we are confident that it will be affirmed on appeal, and we hope that the court will do so expeditiously given that our client is 83 years old.” “Today’s decision is a victory for families and a victory for human rights,” said New York Civil Liberties Union senior staff attorney Melissa Goodman. “Now, all loving couples in our state can truly enjoy the dignity, respect and legal rights that marriage provides.” More on this case can be found at: www.aclu.org/edie NYS Attorney General Eric Schneiderman stated, “Today’s decision is a major step forward in the fight for equality. I am pleased that the court recognized that the federal Defense of Marriage Act lacks any adequate justification and violates the equal protection clause of the U.S. Constitution. As we argued in our brief in this case, the court examined the proposed justifications for the statute with special care, both because the statute burdens minorities, and because it intrudes on the traditional role of states in defining marriage. The State of New York has long recognized out-of-state, same-sex marriages and the enactment of the Marriage Equality Act further cements our state’s position on this critical civil rights issue. My office will continue to fight every day to defend the fundamental guarantee of equal protection of the law for all New Yorkers.”

Federal court of appeals rules DOMA unconstitutional A federal court of appeals in Boston ruled May 31 that DOMA, the “Defense of Marriage Act” that bans federal recognition of same sex legal marriages, is unconstitutional. (A fourth federal court ruled the same way on June 7 – see article on previous page.) The ruling came in a case filed in 2009 by Gay and Lesbian Advocates and Defenders (GLAD) on behalf of a group of married same-sex couples who were denied federal spousal benefits such as Social Security and government employee benefits, as well as a parallel case filed by the Commonwealth of Massachusetts. The opinion upheld a 2010 decision in which U.S. District Judge Joseph Tauro ruled DOMA unconstitutional. Since Judge Tauro’s decision, two other district judges and 20 federal bankruptcy judges have ruled that DOMA violates the Constitution’s Equal Protection Clause, and several additional challenges to DOMA are pending in courts across the country. Writing for a three-judge panel, Judge Michael Boudin observed that DOMA inflicts serious harms on married samesex couples and represents an unprecedented federal intrusion on the traditional

authority of states to regulate marriage. In light of these facts, the panel held that none of the justifications offered by Congress in enacting DOMA was sufficient to uphold it. The court found that there is no “connection between DOMA’s treatment of same-sex couples and its asserted goal of strengthening the bonds and benefits to society of heterosexual marriage,” and that “Congress’ denial of federal benefits to same-sex couples lawfully married in Massachusetts has not been adequately supported by any permissible federal interest.” The court stayed its decision to permit the parties an opportunity to request review by the United States Supreme Court. A party may either request en banc review by all five active judges of the First Circuit within 14 days, or may file a petition requesting review directly with the Supreme Court within 90 days. There is no prescribed time for the Supreme Court to decide whether to accept a case, but the Court generally does not decide to take a case until at least 30 days after a petition for review is filed. Human Rights Campaign HRC applauded the ruling by the United States Court of Appeals for the First Circuit in which it upheld a lower court’s decision that the denial of federal rights and benefits to lawfully-married same-sex couples is unconstitutional. The ruling – authored by President George H.W. Bush appointee Judge Boudin for the three judge panel – comes in two cases: Gill v. Office of Personnel Management, brought by Gay & Lesbian Advocates & Defenders on behalf of married Massachusetts same-sex couples who were denied specific federal rights and benefits and Massachusetts v. Department of Health and Human Services, brought by the Commonwealth of Massachusetts itself. “This ruling is a historic victory for loving gay and lesbian couples and their children,” said HRC President Joe Solmonese. “For the first time, a federal appeals court has recognized that our constitution will not tolerate a law that forces the federal government to deny lawfully-married same-sex couples equal treatment. The writing is clearly on the wall for the demise of this unjust and indefensible law that hurts real families.” Currently, six states and the District of Columbia allow same-sex couples to marry. This year, legislatures in Maryland and Washington State approved marriage equality laws, but they are not yet in effect and are likely to be subject to popular referenda. Under a 1996 law, the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), even lawfully-married couples cannot be recognized by the federal government, and as a result are denied access to more than 1,100 rights, benefits and responsibilities under federal law. These include Social Security survivor benefits, federal employee health benefits for spouses, protections against spouses losing their homes in cases of severe medical emergencies, the right to

5 sponsor a foreign born partner for immigration, the guarantee of family and medical leave and the ability to file joint tax returns, among many others. “We applaud GLAD, the Commonwealth of Massachusetts and the courageous plaintiffs for their incredible efforts on behalf of gay and lesbian couples in Massachusetts and across the nation,” said Solmonese. In July 2010, a federal district court judge ruled in the Gill and Massachusetts cases that DOMA is unconstitutional. Two other federal district courts and a federal bankruptcy court have subsequently agreed. Because the Obama Administration’s Justice Department has decided not to defend DOMA in court, the House Republican leadership through the Bipartisan Legal Advisory Group is currently defending DOMA – with taxpayer money, including gay taxpayers. National Coalition for Lesbian Rights Legal Director Shannon Minter, Esq. stated, “Today’s decision, authored by one of the most well-respected conservative federal judges in the country, sounds the death knell for this discriminatory law. Every day that DOMA remains on the books, it is causing serious harm to samesex couples and their children and branding all lesbian, gay, and bisexual people as inferior. The Supreme Court should affirm this decision so that we can put this shameful period in our nation’s history behind us. The federal government has no interest in treating people differently because of their sexual orientation or gender identity.” Massachusetts AG Martha Coakley “Today’s landmark ruling makes clear once again that DOMA is a discriminatory law for which there is no justification. It is unconstitutional for the federal government to create a system of first- and second-class marriages, and it does harm to families in Massachusetts every day. All Massachusetts couples should be afforded the same rights and protections under the law, and we hope that this decision will be the final step toward ensuring that equality for all.” Lambda Legal “We are thrilled that another court -- this time, the Court of Appeals for the First Circuit -- has ruled that it is unconstitutional to deny respect to the marriages of lesbian and gay couples. The so-called Defense of Marriage Act is being challenged in multiple cases and it won’t be long before that bad law is gone for good. We congratulate our colleagues at Gay and Lesbian Advocates and Defenders (GLAD) and the State of Massachusetts for achieving this wonderful victory.” Freedom To Marry “Today’s unanimous decision issued by the First Circuit Court of Appeals is a powerful affirmation that the so-called Defense of Marriage Act is an unconstitutional and unjust law whose days are numbered. This ruling will return the federal government to its historic role of (Newsfronts continue page 6)

page one (Rabbi continued from page 1) laugh. And not only don’t laugh, tell the people why you’re not laughing.” While touring the exhibit, Horowitz was reminded that Hitler did not take office with the use of force. “He did not come in with might and power. He was voted into office. The German people overwhelmingly voted the Nazis into office. And they somehow believed the equal rights of human beings could be voted on….” The parallels are too obvious to ignore between the totalitarian government with a fascist regime and our own. “Don’t allow a Nazi party to be elected into the United States of America,” Horowitz said. “As I stand here now, much more serious than I thought I would be, I say to you, gay, straight, I don’t care: Get out there and build allies.” His uplifting words of encouragement received profuse applause. “We’re going to make it happen.” The evening also featured speeches from Leslie Berkowitz (Executive Director for JCC) and PFLAG’s Sy Zivan, and a performance by Rob Straus and the Rochester Gay Men’s Chorus. The exhibit is free and runs daily until July 22; the Gay Alliance will be hosting a Pride event, Beyond Gay Pride at JCC on July 5. Please check http://www.jccrochester. org for hours and more information. ■

(PFLAG continued from page 1) Traveling Exhibit at the JCC. PFLAG President Pat Cole and her daughter were there to help unpack the exhibit the day it arrived. PFLAG members are always in the background of support, advocacy and education for our community and families. It was exciting to have a special members meeting in May at which Rabbi David M. Horowitz, PFLAG National President, joined members of the Rochester PFLAG to tell his personal story of how he became involved as a father with the Dayton PFLAG Chapter. His message was that through our own family stories of our children coming out to us, we could further reach or touch others who need support. David also noted that many religious institutions are evolving and this is also a wonderful opportunity for all of us at this time in history to be a witness to and part of the ongoing civil rights struggle of our LGBTQ community. PFLAG partners with Walgreen PFLAG Rochester is involved in a new initiative and will be visible during the week long Pride Festivities of July 5-15, in which Rochester PFLAG is partnering with Walgreen in CARE With PRIDE. Rochester PFLAG always marches in the Rochester Pride Parade (the parade will be July 14 this year). Forty years ago last month, Jeanne Manford walked

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 458 • JUly 2012 proudly alongside her gay son in a New York City Pride march, inspiring PFLAG’s movement of caring and inclusion for the LGBT community. This year we march for our loved ones and ourselves and also to send a message to the people on the sidelines and to the community about our support, by participating in the CARE With PRIDE campaign. This campaign is an important opportunity to expand the PFLAG voice even further on a message that is near and dear to our hearts: the impact of bullying and our collective efforts to make schools safe for all children. With the partnering of 500 Walgreen stores, we will be handing out booklets with coupons and rebates up to $65 which are redeemable at all Walgreen stores around the country. These redeemed coupons will give PFLAG chapters which participate $1 per coupon. Our Rochester Chapter being a non-profit organization, this will help us further our support, education and advocacy programs. If you are interested in the PFLAG Conference on July 15, there is a $30 registration fee. For information on that or any of the upcoming events, call me at 797-7679. ■

local and state (Trans from page 3) Advisory Panel Member Melissa Sklarz. “These patrol guide modifications are a testament to our community’s perseverance and the ability of the NYPD to compromise. I am grateful to Mayor Bloomberg, Commissioner Kelly and Speaker Christine C. Quinn for creating an environment to allow trans women, trans advocates and the NYPD to get together, meet regularly and try to reevaluate a police process that will make life for transgender women safer in New York.” “These patrol guide changes will help ensure that NYPD officers treat transgender and gender-nonconforming New Yorkers with courtesy, professionalism and respect,” said Melissa Goodman, Senior Litigation and Policy Counsel for LGBT Rights at New York Civil Liberties Union. “Now NYPD officers must respect a person’s gender identity when they make an arrest or detain people. This protects basic civil liberties and strengthens trust between police officers and the public they serve.” “This is a watershed moment when all New Yorkers can be proud. Our nation’s largest police force, serving our nation’s most diverse citizenry, listened to the voices of transgender New Yorkers and took steps to address their concerns about policing practices. The result will be a stronger police force that can protect and serve all New Yorkers fairly and equally,” said Michael Silverman, Executive Director, Transgender Legal Defense and Education Fund.

“We are very proud of the work that the Advisory Panel has done to make revisions to the Patrol Guide. We hope that the NYPD effectively implements these new guidelines with respect and dignity for TGNC people. As a member of the NYPD LGBT Advisory Panel, we will work to inform LGBTQ Youth of Color of their rights when interacting with the NYPD and continue to take action to ensure that NYPD officers are accountable to the new guidelines,” said John Blasco, Lead Organizer at FIERCE. ‘The NYPD’s new Patrol Guide provisions make clear that discrimination, harassment or disparaging comments based on actual or perceived gender is defined and prohibited as required by Local Law 3,” said Civil Rights Attorney and Coordinator of Streetwise and Safe Andrea Ritchie. “The new policies in the Patrol Guide now mandate that New York City Police officers must respect transgender & gender nonconforming (TGNC) people’s gender identity and expression and explicitly prohibits NYPD officers from conducting any search for the purpose of determining a person’s gender. The revisions also address the LGBT community’s concerns regarding the hand cuffing individuals to benches and rails while in police custody.” ■

national and international (DOMA from page 5) respecting marriages performed in the states, without carving out a ‘gay exception’ that denies thousands of protections. As more loving same-sex couples commit their lives to one another in marriage, the harms of this unjust law become more clear – from service members, risking their lives to protect ours, being denied the ability to protect their own families through military medical insurance or

survivor benefits to senior citizens having to move out of their homes after their partners of many decades pass on because they cannot access Social Security protections afforded any other legally married couple.” Servicemembers Legal Defense Network “At SLDN, we applaud the court for affirming that legal marriages in the states -- and all the rights and protections that come with those marriages -- should be recognized and respected by our federal government. Though a narrow decision, this important victory nonetheless paves the way further for litigation like McLaughlin v. U.S., SLDN’s case on behalf of married gay and lesbian service members and veterans who are denied equal recognition, support and benefits for their families by this discriminatory law. We congratulate the GLAD attorneys and plaintiffs in this case and look forward with them to the day when every American - especially those putting their lives on the line to protect our nation has the freedom to marry the person they love, knowing that their commitment will be honored by their government.”

Boy Scouts may change anti-gay policies Sources have confirmed that Boy Scouts of America officials have proposed a new policy -- which could be voted on as early as 2013 -- that would allow local chartering organizations to decide whether or not to accept gay youth and leaders. The proposal comes after Eagle Scout Zach Wahls delivered more than 275,000 signatures to the National Annual Meeting of the Boy Scouts of America from a popular petition on Change.org. The petition calls on the Boy Scouts to reinstate a lesbian den leader in Ohio, Jennifer Tyrrell, who was removed from her position because of her sexual orientation, and to (Boy Scouts continue page 12)

JUly 2012 • number 458 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

Interview

HATE VIOLENCE IN KIEV: Gay activist Sviatoslav Sheremet is beaten by neo-Nazis at a press conference called to tell media why Kiev Pride was canceled. This is why.

Rev. Mulcahy marries a lesbian couple in Nikolaev, Ukraine.

Rev. Jim Mulcahy By Susan Jordan The Reverend Jim Mulcahy has just returned from Eastern Europe, where he found both terrible obstacles to LGBT freedom and reason for hope. The first Kiev Pride March in May was violently disrupted, and police refused to protect the gay marchers, two of whom were savagely beaten. Meanwhile, in Croatia, a Pride march went off successfully, because most members of the Croatian government want to join the European Parliament – and that body has condemned countries which repress their LGBT citizens. (See article on page 4.) Rev. Mulcahy said, “The first day of Kiev Pride went off successfully, because it was held at a hotel outside the city. The second day was to be the Pride march. It was canceled because 6,000 antigay counter demonstrators divided into groups and stood at every Metro (subway) exit in order to prevent our gathering and marching. Their intention was violence.” Rev. Mulcahy said that the main force of anti-gay activists is made up of an alliance between neo-Nazi skinheads and conservative Orthodox religious. He said, “Three gay leaders were going to have a press conference to talk about what had happened. Two of them, Sviatoslav Sheremet of Kiev and Maxim Kasanchuk from Donetsk, were severely beaten. There is one photo of an attacker leap-

ing in the air to land on Sviatoslav. The beating was treated as a crime – but the attackers wore masks and escaped since no police were present. “In Nikolaev,” he said, “we had a successful IDAHO (International Day Against Homophobia) march on May 17. It was government-sanctioned. One of the big underwriters was the Embassy of the Netherlands, which is very pro gay. They brought in two Dutch police officers, one gay man and one lesbian, from a unique Amsterdam police detail called ‘Pink and Blue.’ They are first responders to all incidents involving LGBT people. The program has been so successful that it is now being implemented all over the Netherlands and they travel all over the world training local police, including in NYC. These two police officers were in full dress uniform, very impressive, and after the event they socialized with the local police.” In the evening, Rev. Mulcahy officiated at the wedding of two women. Two couples he married in 2011 – a gay male and a lesbian couple – were in attendance and the Dutch police officers were witnesses, though the marriage is not legal. “After the wedding,” he said, “we international guests went back to the headquarters of LIGA, the local version of the Gay Alliance, you might say, for dinner. The executive director of LIGA and his partner have been together for 10 years, and I renewed their vows. It was a

wonderful evening. “LIGA, with funding from the Netherlands Embassy, held a three day professional workshop for Ukrainian social workers and psychologists to hear the latest studies on LGBT issues.” Rev. Mulcahy says that there are no LGBT publications in the Ukraine, but “social media is the organizing tool – and it’s incredibly effective.” He added, “This month Lady Gaga is coming to Kiev for a concert, and she has said she will address gay rights and homophobia. This will be big: her appeal is of course a whole lot wider than just to gays.” He feels that young people in Eastern Europe will increasingly reject the old repression, hatreds and prejudices. After leaving Kiev, Rev. Mulcahy went to Bucharest, Romania to meet with his MCC counterpart; Nancy Wilson who is head of MCC, and the head of the Global Justice Institute, Rev. Pat Baumgartner. “The highlight from my perspective,” he said, “was the public lecture by Nancy Wilson at the university – it was on ‘The Body, Sexuality and Spirituality.’ We had 30 people in attendance – 28 women and two men. The women were mostly heterosexual and in their 20s or early 30s. None had ever heard such a lecture – a frank lecture on topics including abortion – from a religious person. Most of the people in attendance have a marginal relationship with the church. It’s unusual for an Eastern European audience to openly discuss topics of sexuality – it’s not part of the culture. So the willingness of these young women to speak out was remarkable. “A law is pending in Romania, not outlawing abortion, but requiring women to sign a paper saying they acknowledge

that they are killing a human being.” He feels that this is similar to controversial laws proposed in some U.S. states that would punish women who seek abortions, for instance with invasive and unneeded ultra sound scans of their vaginas. Rev. Mulcahy said, “The day after the conference, the Americans including Nancy, Pat and myself met with the Romanian Council of Churches. I can’t tell you how frustrating that meeting was. Absolute stonewalling on LGBT issues and absolute opposition to anything that might indicate support of abortion. “I’m going back to Kiev in the beginning of September. In October I will be attending a highly unpublicized conference for LGBT Christians in Moscow.” He offered “one story of hope. A young man named Sergei from Moscow was at a meeting I attended in Kiev, and he talked about how he is out to his mother, who struggles with his sexuality. There was a radio talk show one day where a religious speaker was spewing homophobic hatred, bigotry and lies. The boy’s mother called in to the live show and said, ‘What you’re saying isn’t true. My son is gay and he’s a good boy – he is none of the things you are saying!’ “Her son was so proud of her, and shocked. She had bought into these ideas, but when she heard someone say these things, she realized they weren’t true.” ■

Join Jim on July 5 at JCC for a Gay Alliance Pride event. Rochester Kink Society Ltd

Western New York’s Premiere Playspace

“Safe, Sane, Consensual” “A Safe Zone”

585.234.5295 P.O. Box 18556 • Rochester, NY 14618 email: rks@rochesterkinksociety.com www.rochesterkinksociety.com

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 458 • JUly 2012

JUly 2012 • number 458 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

the the empty empty closet closet •• the the gay gay alliance alliance of of the the genesee genesee valley valley •• number number 457 458 •• JUNE 2012 JUly 2012

Making the Scene

keeping pace with aids: Team Outlandish leading the walk portion of the AIDSCare fundraiser on June 3. Fundraising total was $60,000.

ROAD TRIP: The Rochester Gay Men’s Chorus performed their summer concert on June 16 at Hochstein. Photos: Jeffrey Cougler

My Own Private Rochester: Ed Popil By Susan Jordan Ed Popil is the man behind the fabulous Mrs. Kasha Davis, International Celebrity Housewife. Not everyone knows that Ed, born in Scranton, Pa., was once a ballet dancer, and a featured artiste at the Ballet Theatre of Scranton. Also an actor with tons of stage presence, he comes at drag from the angle of comedy and acting rather than fashion and glamour. Ed worked for DialAmerica in Scranton and in 1999 was sent to Rochester to open a new branch of the call center company in Henrietta. He is now director, and has just moved to a new site, a remodeled building on Brighton Townline Road. “We are adding at least 150 new employees,” he said proudly. “We should have around 400 workers by September.” Ed’s favorite Rochester person is of course his husband Steve Levins, of whom Ed says, “He is my prince and dream come true.” Ed got married to Steve on May 26. In 2003 the two vacationed in Provincetown and that was when Ed got the idea of doing drag. “We’d seen Aggy Dune and others here in Rochester and loved it,” Ed said, “but I never thought I’d do that. Aggy’s so pretty and I couldn’t imagine looking like that. In Provincetown we saw Miss Richfield 2003, a comedian with a huge wig,

Kasha and Aggy Dune of the Big Wigs will emcee the Pride Festival on July 14.

and we went to see the show at least three times. We couldn’t get enough of her. I decided I could do that – especially the comedy and humor aspect. “I thought about what my drag name would be and decided my first name would be that of my first pet, a white poodle named Kasha. I lived on Davis St. so that became my last name. I came back to Rochester and asked Ambrosia Salad what I had to do to be able to do drag. She said ‘It’s customary for a queen to name you’ – but I already had my name. “Naiomy Kane at Muther’s just said, ‘You’ll be on next Sunday.’ I had NOTHING prepared! They probably thought that this was going to be a big joke. So I went to Utter Clutter and found a mother-of-the-bride blue sequin long gown, and went to Goodwill and bought a lime green jumpsuit. Those were my first drag outfits. “I did two numbers – ‘I Enjoy Being a Girl’ and ‘Lime Green Jello Marshmellow Cottage Cheese Surprise.’ That was the beginning of Mrs. Kasha Davis, International Celebrity Housewife. That Sunday was fantastic. I didn’t realize that drag was just like theatre. I imagined who Kasha was and where she lived and how she’s always stuck being a housewife and wants to be a performer. So Naiomy said I had to come back next week and from then on I was one of the girls.” The group at Muther’s was very close due to Naiomy Kane (Carlos Cruz)’s influence, and his loss is deeply felt. The rest is history. In the past seven years, Kasha and Aggy have become famous for their Big Wigs show (Aug. 2 at Golden Ponds), and Ed, in addition to being Kasha, has starred in such local productions as Michael Steck’s “Lipstick Massacre” with Pandora Boxx at MuCCC and Geva Nextstage, and last fall’s “The Mystery of Irma Vep” at Blackfriars. The Big Wigs will emcee the Pride Festival on July 14. Ed’s favorite restaurant is Hedges, on the lake in Webster, which, he says, “is the 1950s/60s seafood house. You get your cocktail and sit out in the Adirondack chairs watching the sunset.” A pizza devotee, Ed says the best local pie is found at Compane at the canal in Fairport. His favorite gay bar is the Bachelor Forum. “It’s so well run,” he commented, “and Peter Mohr gets involved with the community.” He also likes Flight at Corn Hill Landing, a wine tasting bar. “It’s small, intimate and social.” Ed and Steve enjoy walking, biking or running along the canal, and sometimes get all the way to Charlotte (where he also loves the Pelican’s Nest restaurant). Theatre buff Ed tries to get to all the area productions he can – Blackfriars, JCC, Geva Nextstage, MuCCC and the rest. He says, “I especially loved ‘Grey Gardens’ at Blackfriars; they were phenomenal.” Ed goes up to three days a week to Power Within Yoga at Upper Level Fitness. “With the help of my trainers

and life coaches Lori Austin and Kwasi Boaitey,” he said, “I’ve been able to start running again.” He recently ran in the “Dirt Cheap” race organized by Fleet Feet Fitness (on Monroe Ave.) “This one was in Ellison Wetlands,” he said. “You stay in single file and run up and down hill, jump over trees – we were all laughing and yelling, ‘What are we doing?’” Ed’s favorite Rochester events are a tie between the Pride Festival and the Picnic. “I like the Picnic more because I am emcee at the Festival, and at the Picnic I can relax and just have fun. I love it. I have a lot of respect for Carrie Vernon (Pride chair); she goes everywhere.” He also enjoys the Corn Hill Festival. Ed is obsessed with shopping, especially at consignment stores like Lu’s Back Door, where he “mills about” searching for “sparkly things.” Coming up next for Ed is a revised version of his own autobiographical show, which will be staged in September with the help of Ralph Meranto of JCC. The new title is “There’s Always Time for a Cocktail,” and he is writing a new ending – “But I don’t want to give it away!” It will be produced by JCC at the Kodak Theatre. Stay tuned for the August and September ECs to learn more. ■

Ed at Flight. Photo: Susan Jordan

JUNE 2012 JUly 2012 •• number number 458 457 •• gay gay alliance alliance of of the the genesee genesee valley valley •• the the empty empty closet closet

TEA DANCE AT ONE: Tim Tompkins and Todd Perkins with Lt. Gov. Bob Duffy and Mrs. Barbara Duffy at ONE Restaurant on June 3. The event supported the Gay Alliance’s Shoulders To Stand On project, and Lt. Gov. Duffy received a special award. Above right: Harry Bronson with friends. Full coverage on page 21. Photos: Jeff Mills

Keke Velasquez-Lord and Vanity Faire.

Julian Brown and Thomas Warfield.

JCC OPENING: The JCC hosted an opening reception for the U.S. Holocaust Memorial Museum traveling exhibit, “Nazi Persecution of Homosexuals 1933-1945,” on May 24. The exhibit is up until July 22. Above: Ralph Meranto of JCC. Photos: Gerry Szymanski

Tim Tompkins and Ron Pawleczak.

Evelyn Bailey of Shoulders to Stand On with Bill Kelly and Rick Easterley.

national and international (Boy Scouts continued from page 6) end the Boy Scouts’ long-held policy barring openly gay scouts and scout leaders. “Last Wednesday I delivered 275,000 petition signatures -- including the signatures of thousands of scouts and scout leaders -- to the Boy Scouts of America because I love the organization and I refuse to stand by idly as it forfeits its cultural relevancy at the very moment this country needs it most,” said Wahls. “In proposing to allow local charter organizations to decide whether or not they’ll include gay youth and leaders within their ranks, the Boy Scouts of America has taken an historic step forward, and I applaud their bravery in doing so.” Wahls met with the Boy Scouts of America’s Public Relations Director Deron Smith, and other top-ranking Boy Scout officials who asked not to be named, after delivering the 275,000 petition signatures to the organization’s annual national meeting. “As both an Eagle Scout with a personal investment in the success of the Boy Scouts of America and as the son of a lesbian couple, it means a lot to see this change finally set in motion,” added Wahls. Wahls, the author of “My Two Moms: Lessons of Love, Strength, and What Makes a Family” and whose online video in support of his two gay moms went viral last year, delivered the signatures on behalf of Jennifer Tyrrell. After being removed from her position, Tyrrell started a petition on Change.org asking to be reinstated, and urging the Boy Scouts to stop dividing families and communities with a policy that excludes gay families, scouts and leaders. “When I got the call from the Boy Scouts of America signaling that I could no longer serve as my seven-year-old’s Cub

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 458 • JUly 2012 Scout den leader, I was heartbroken. But the blow was softened by the outpouring of support I received from my community and the parents of the boys I had dedicated myself to,” said Tyrrell. “I know if it was up to my community, I’d still be a Cub Scout Den Leader today, so this news is definitely a huge step in the right direction for the Boy Scouts of America.” Tyrrell’s petition on Change.org earned the support of scores of celebrities, including most recently GLEE’s Dianna Agron, who signed the petition at the GLAAD media awards in San Francisco, where Tyrrell was featured and addressed the crowd. Other celebrities endorsing Tyrrell’s petition include Josh Hutcherson, Julianne Moore, Ricky Martin, Fran Drescher, Kelly Osbourne, Benicio Del Toro, and more. “Zach and the thousands of scouts and scout leaders who have joined Jennifer’s campaign were able to connect through the petition in a way that has never happened before, which definitely caught the attention of the Boy Scouts of America,” said Mark Anthony Dingbaum, Campaign Manager at Change.org. “Change happens when everyday people like Jennifer are brave enough to share personal stories that inspire hundreds of thousands to take action -- and that’s what Change. org is all about.” Scouts Board member backs change James Turley, Chairman & CEO of Ernst & Young and a Board member of the Boy Scouts of America, announced on June 12 that he supports an end to the Boy Scouts’ ban on gay scouts and gay scout leaders. In a statement issued June 12 by Ernst & Young, Turley said that he will work from within the Boy Scouts as a national board member to help change their policies. “Ernst & Young is proud to have such a strong record in LGBT inclusiveness. As CEO, I know that having an inclusive culture produces the best results, is the right thing for our people and makes us

a better organization. My experience has led me to believe that an inclusive environment is important throughout our society and I am proud to be a leader on this issue,” Turley said. “I support the meaningful work of the Boy Scouts in preparing young people for adventure, leadership, learning and service, however the membership policy is not one I would personally endorse. As I have done in leading Ernst & Young to being a most inclusive organization, I intend to continue to work from within the BSA Board to actively encourage dialogue and sustainable progress.”

Gay man sues NJ hospital for doctor’s denial of HIV meds New Jersey gay man Joao Simoes is suing his hospital after an on-staff doctor refused him his HIV medications. Dr. Susan Borga* allegedly later told his private physician what the patient had done to become infected was “against God’s will” and therefore he did not deserve medical treatment. When the hospital finally permitted Simoes to call his personal physician on the third day of his stay, he learned that the doctor had already spoken with Borga about Simoes’ medication, according to the complaint. Borga allegedly stated, “You must be gay, too, if you’re his doctor.” “Additionally, apparently realizing that plaintiff’s doctor had an accent, Dr. Borga exclaimed, ‘What, do you need a translator?’ to which plaintiff’s doctor had again responded that Dr. Borga needed to give plaintiff his HIV medication,” the complaint states. “Dr. Borga responded to plaintiff’s doctor by stating, ‘This is what he gets for going against God’s will,’ and hung up the phone on plaintiff’s doctor.” The hospital also initially refused to allow the patient’s sister to visit him. She was finally permitted to bring him his medications after he’d missed five doses. Missing doses of HIV medication can cause the patient to become resistant to the drugs. (*It appears that the original news item may have misspelled the doctor’s name. A Google search for Dr. Susan V. Borja shows her working at the named hospital.)

General Mills, Target oppose MN marriage ban; Best Buy holds out As Minnesota-based company General Mills condemned a proposed ban on gay marriage as bad for the state’s economy, more than 20,000 people joined a popular campaign on Change.org calling on Best Buy to speak out against a 2012 ballot measure that would amend the Minnesota constitution to define marriage as between a man and a woman. Andrew Korando, a recent University of Minnesota Law School graduate, started the campaign on Change.org last month, following Target Corporation’s statement in opposition to the Minnesota marriage amendment. On June 14, General Mills vice president for global diversity and inclusion Ken Charles wrote: “We do not believe the proposed constitutional amendment is in the best interests of our employees or our state economy. We value diversity. We value inclusion.” With General Mills and Target condemning the measure, Best Buy remains one of the largest Minnesota companies that has yet to weigh in on the issue. “Best Buy is increasingly alienating itself from other Minnesota-based companies that recognize the importance of fairness and equality in recruiting top talent and building a strong state economy,” said Andrew Korando, who launched the campaign on Change.org. “I applaud General Mills and Target for leading the way, and hope that the more than 20,000 people who have joined my campaign -many of them tech geeks like me -- will convince Best Buy to do the right thing and speak out against this discriminatory

amendment.” General Mills’ opposition to the marriage amendment follows Target Corp., which last month issued a statement, in part saying: “Target does not believe that a constitutional fight over the issue is good for Minnesota or the state’s ability to attract jobs and grow the economy.” For every new signature on Andrew’s petition, an email is sent to Best Buy’s executive leadership and members of their employee LGBT group (PRIDE). Despite touting a 100 percent score on the Human Rights Campaign’s Corporate Equality Index -- a ranking of the top LGBT-friendly employers -- Best Buy came under considerable fire in 2010 for giving $100,000 to a political action committee that funneled money to anti-gay politicians. “It’s been incredible to watch Andrew’s campaign grow by more than 20,000 people in just 15 days,” said Mark Anthony Dingbaum, campaign manager at Change.org. “With just a laptop, he’s mobilized thousands of Best Buy shoppers to speak out on an issue that’s important to them.”

SPLC wins right for students to support gays The Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC) announced June 12 that the Hardin County (TN.) School District has recognized the right of students to express acceptance of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender students, including the right to display slogans and symbols expressing such acceptance. In response to SPLC’s May 17 letter, an attorney for the district confirmed in writing that “all students within the District may peacefully display non-vulgar expressions in support of LGBT people so long as such displays do not materially and substantially interfere with the requirements of appropriate discipline in the operation of the school or otherwise collide with the rights of others.” The letter further stated that the list of slogans such as “Gay Pride, Speak Up, Speak Out, Be Proud,” “Lesbian and Proud,” “Gay? Fine by me,” “I Love My Gay Friends,” and others included in SPLC’s letter to the district last month are not vulgar, lewd, or sexually suggestive and thus do not violate school board policy. “Peaceably displaying non-vulgar slogans in support of LGBT people violates the rights of no one,” said Sam Wolfe, a civil rights lawyer with SPLC’s LGBT Rights Project. “As explained in our initial letter, if some students complain or are disruptive in response to such expressions, the school has a duty to address the students causing the disruption, but not to censor protected speech. We will continue monitoring the district’s practices and take appropriate legal action if necessary.” The district’s statement comes after the SPLC sent a letter to school officials last month on behalf of Hardin County High School student Isabella Nuzzo, who is not gay but desires to express support for her gay friends. Several HCHS students had been told they could not display slogans and symbols supportive of LGBT equality. “I feel overwhelmed at this success,” Isabella said. “This shows that we can make a positive impact at school and if we can do it there, we can do it anywhere. This victory is for my gay friends at Hardin County High School and for LGBT people throughout Tennessee who deserve an equal and respected place in our communities.” The letter was prompted after several students at HCHS were told by an assistant principal that they could not display slogans and symbols supportive of LGBT equality, including a T-shirt with a rainbow because of a dress code prohibiting students from “advertising” or “promoting” sex. The official also attempted, by threatening students with discipline, to terminate a student-organized “Week of Pride” intended to show support for (SPLC continue page 14)

JUly 2012 • number 458 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

The Avenue Pub 37 Year Landmark in the Gay Community

y ears 30

er ov

y ears 30

Est. 1975

comm

y f or

Serving Roches ter’s ga

Est. 1975

The Avenue Pub 522 Monroe Avenue 585-244-4960

f or

Serving Roches ter’s

national and international (SPLC from page 12) LGBT students. Students organized the Week of Pride in support of a classmate who was threatened with discipline in April if she did not remove or reverse a T-shirt with the slogan “Lesbian and Proud” she wore as part of the national Day of Silence. The Day of Silence is a national event that raises awareness about the harassment and bullying of LGBT youth. Statements supportive of LGBT people are protected under the First and Fourteenth Amendments of the U.S. Constitution. This is true even in communities that harbor anti-gay sentiment. “The Constitution protects the bedrock principle of our democracy that the government, including school officials, may not ban expressions of an opinion they simply dislike,” Wolfe said. “Permitting greater freedom is almost always the better course and can prevent expensive litigation.” A copy of the letter can be found at http://www.splcenter.org/sites/default/ files/downloads/resource/051712_ SPLC_Letter_to_HCHS__Board.pdf

Many Iowa Methodists protest church’s homophobic policy

Hundreds of Iowa Methodists signed protest documents at their annual conference on Sunday, June 3, declaring they are prepared to buck the leadership of their church on matters concerning gays and gay marriage. A group called Do No Harm Iowa has gathered as many as 500 signatures -- including those of about 70 pastors -- in response to the most recent meeting of the United Methodist Churches’

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 458 • JUly 2012 global conference of leaders. A vote at that meeting, which is held every four years, determined the church’s book of doctrine and rules would continue to call the practice of homosexuality “incompatible with Christian teaching.” But that, said Rev. Diane McClanahan of Trinity United Methodist Church in Des Moines, is incompatible with her own concept of Jesus. “There are so many pieces of Scripture we no longer abide by because we have a different context,” said McClanahan, who served as a spokesperson for Do No Harm Iowa. “(Homosexuality) is just the issue of the day.” The United Methodist Church continues to formally ban the marriage of same-sex couples and the ordination of gay clergy. Two protest documents were read June 3, following the report on the United Methodist General Conference, which ended May 4 in Tampa, Fla. Many among the 1,600 delegates wore blue “Do No Harm” T-shirts and stood silently during both readings.

Moscow court bans Pride for next 100 years A Moscow court has banned gay pride events for the next hundred years. Tverskoy district court ruled lawful the decision of the Moscow municipal government to ban public events that can be qualified as gay parades from March 2012 till May 2112. Nikolay Alekseyev, one of the leaders of the Russian LGBT community and organizer of gay pride events, told reporters that he intended to appeal the decision in the Moscow City Court Presidium, and that if the highest Russian instance also rules against him, to address the European Court of Human Rights. Alekseyev explained to the reporters that in 2011, the activists found a loophole in Russian legislation and submit-

ted requests for 102 gay pride parades to the Moscow Mayor’s office. According to the activist, all they got in return was a letter with a quote from regulations, although the law obliges the city authorities to either allow or ban the planned event within 15 days.

Transwoman gets two years for self-defense; Feinberg arrested at Minneapolis protest On June 4 Chrishaun “CeCe” McDonald was sentenced to a 41 month prison sentence by Judge Daniel Moreno. She had killed a man who had violently attacked her because she is transgender and African American. CeCe McDonald, 24, was walking with a group of her friends in Minneapolis on the night of June 5, 2011. As CeCe and her friends walked by the Schooner Tavern, a group of white bar patrons began shouting racist and transphobic slurs at them. One of the women in the group smashed her beer glass across CeCe’s face. In CeCe’s struggle to defend her life from this violent attack, Dean Schmitz, one of her attackers, died. CeCe was quickly arrested and charged with two counts of second degree murder. In May 2012, CeCe accepted a plea agreement to a reduced charge of second degree manslaughter by negligence, and on June 4 she received a 41-month prison sentence. On June 5, she was transferred to a men’s prison in St. Cloud, Mn. The sentencing proceedings included statements from community leaders, clergy, and McDonald’s family, testifying to McDonald’s loving character and expressing concern for her safety if she is sentenced to serve time in a men’s prison, given the high rates of physical and sexual violence against transgender women in men’s prisons. Around 80 Twin Cities residents arrived to show their support for McDonald, overflowing the courtroom

where sentencing proceedings were held. Although McDonald has been under state supervision for the past 366 days (in jail and under in-home monitoring) the judge determined that she will only receive credit for 275 days served, excluding the time she spent on in-home monitoring. Between this time served and time off for good behavior, McDonald will likely spend less than two more years in prison. Additionally, McDonald was ordered to pay $6410 in restitution for her attacker’s death. The Department of Corrections has not determined where McDonald will spend the remainder of her sentence, but it is likely that she will go to one of Minnesota’s men’s prisons. In recently released federal standards on the elimination of sexual abuse in prisons, the Department of Justice notes that transgender people should be evaluated on a case-by-case basis to place them where they will be in the least danger (not solely based on genitals). Moreover, the DOJ guidelines seek to minimize the use of solitary confinement for the alleged protection of transgender prisoners. These standards apply to state prisons that receive federal funding. They may impact McDonald, who has been held in a men’s facility for the past year, and twice been sent to solitary confinement against her will. For supporters, McDonald’s sentencing marks a turning point, but not an end to their efforts. “This is not a resolution to CeCe’s case: she should not be serving time simply for surviving a vicious attack. But the prosecution felt so much pressure in this high profile case that they knew they had to offer a less egregious charge than second-degree murder,” said Josina Manu. “We’ll stand by CeCe throughout her sentence and after she’s released.” Culture of violence targets trans women of color Supporters have consistently rejected County Attorney Michael Freeman’s ( Transwoman continues on page 16)

JUly 2012 • number 458 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

Opinion Marching Together, Marching as One By Rea Carey, Executive Director, National Gay and Lesbian Task Force In the past month, we have seen milestone after milestone in the march toward lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) equality. But there is a key element of this progress that we should shine a light on. What for many seemed like a red light at the intersection of race, class, sexual orientation and gender identity has turned yellow -- even green -- as we see diverse groups strongly and publicly supporting each other across issues and working for civil rights -- human rights -- for all people. But we know well that perception is often far from reality. And this week we all learned a valuable lesson: the early days of the AIDS crisis taught us Silence = Death, but on June 17 we learned that silence can also be a powerful, life-affirming and uniting force when people come together in solidarity and bear witness in silence to injustice. Of course, we all saw President Barack Obama became the first-ever sitting president to express his personal support for marriage equality as a civil right; in fact, he urged the rest of America to “evolve” on the issue in comments at an LGBT Pride reception at the White House last week. In addition, the NAACP’s national board, for the first time, endorsed marriage equality. New polling has shown an impressive surge in support for marriage equality by African-American voters in Maryland, where a referendum this November will decide the fate of the state’s marriage equality law. This is very different from the specious “blame game” played after the loss of Prop. 8 in California that attempted to lay the defeat at the feet of African Americans, a baseless and racist analysis that we still need to debunk regularly. The truth is that the so-called “wedge” between LGBT people and people of color has been a red herring and tool of the anti-LGBT organizations for so long that, sadly, even our own community was starting to buy it, as many did after Prop. 8. No longer. June 17’s rally demanding an end to stop-and-frisk tactics employed by New York City police was a perfect example and hopefully the beginning of an era for more sophisticated and realistic discussion of communities working together and the overlap not only of why a broad set of issues are part of our agenda, but how the LGBT community’s diversity itself makes it imperative we focus on issues that many may not see as “LGBT issues.” As we continue to celebrate LGBT Pride month, I think we can all be proud that we have reached a point where support for LGBT equality can unite more of us -- rather than dividing us along lines of sexual orientation, race, religion and income, as our opponents have long sought to do. The National Organization for Marriage’s now-infamous leaked documents may have advised “fanning the hostility” between African Americans and LGBT people and “driv[ing] a wedge between gays and blacks.” But the right can no longer hope to use marriage equality as a wedge issue as they have tried in the past. African-American support for LGBT equality is both greater and more visible than ever before. And the LGBT community is stepping up on issues of importance to African Americans. The reality is that this support is not a one-way street, nor is it new. It’s just that is has become news. We, along with other LGBT people, have stood with African Americans on issues of racial justice for decades. After all, for black LGBT people and their allies, we cannot separate out racial justice from improving our

lives as LGBT people. My organization, along with scores of other LGBT organizations, stands firm against racial profiling. On June 17 in New York City, the Task Force took a leading role in a silent march protesting the NYPD’s stop-andfrisk policy, which has been abused to the point where police can effectively treat all people of color as potential criminals. We marched alongside our partners such as the NAACP, the National Action Network, and the SEIU -- all of whom are ardent supporters of LGBT rights. Racial justice and LGBT equality are not separate issues; they are deeply intertwined. In fact, it is LGBT people of color who often bear the greatest burdens from both homophobia and racial and economic injustice. Where these experiences intersect is a very dangerous place to be in our society. LGBT people, of course, have their own history of unjust treatment from law

As we continue to celebrate LGBT Pride month, I think we can all be proud that we have reached a point where support for LGBT equality can unite more of us -rather than dividing us along lines of sexual orientation, race, religion and income, as our opponents have long sought to do. enforcement not the least of which was the raid on the Stonewall Inn in 1969, launching the modern LGBT movement. But The Task Force does not just stand in solidarity with LGBT people; we stand against racial profiling for all people of color. The entire concept of it goes against not only the principle of “innocent until proven guilty,” it undermines the free society we fight for every single day. On June 17, we marched down the same street -- Fifth Avenue -- where we will soon march for LGBT Pride, literally following in the footsteps of our stand against racial profiling. Seeing the connections between our experiences as people of color, as LGBT people, as those who care about freedom and justice, is critical to our country’s ability to move forward. In fact, the Associated Press story that ran about the March on June 17 was headlined, “Civil rights, gay activists march to NYC mayor’s home, demand end to stop-and-frisk policing,” showing that our solidarity and collaboration are finally being noticed in a bigger way. And it’s about time. In 2012, the year of what would have been gay civil rights leader Bayard Rustin’s 100th birthday, we are continuing the trail he blazed as he marched with Martin Luther King Jr.: a path for people of all sexual orientations, races, genders, and faiths, walking hand in hand toward equality together.

One Baptist church does not speak for all By Rev. Dr. Michael J. Ford, Senior Minister, Lake Avenue Memorial Baptist Church When President Obama recently declared his support for same-sex marriage, many people cheered, praising him for heralding in a new era for true equality and civil rights. Others, however, did not share the same sense of joy and celebration. There was jeering, and in some cases, very public criticism and condemnation. One of the most public expressions of disagreement and discontent came from Pastor Charles Worley of Providence Baptist Church in Minden, NC. One Sunday morning, Worley chose to use his pulpit to express a series of

hate-filled and bigoted comments regarding homosexuals. His remarks garnered national attention. In a recent letter to the editor of a local newspaper, a writer expressed his concern that the LGBT community was forced to stand alone in their public opposition to this type of hate-filled rhetoric from Worley and others. I responded to this editorial and write in again in this forum to share a couple of important thoughts. As a Baptist minister who is privileged to serve a Welcoming and Affirming Baptist Church in Rochester, I am writing to say to Worley, “You do not speak for me!” Just because he holds to such hate-filled and bigoted opinions, and just because he represents a particular church or denomination is not to say that all pastors, or all Baptist churches, hold to similar views. Rather, there are a number of progressive Baptist Churches that have chosen to be Welcoming and Affirming, publicly declaring their desire for the world to know that all people, regardless of sexual orientation, are invited to be part of their communities of faith. The church that I serve, Lake Avenue Memorial Baptist Church, is one such church. Lake Avenue Baptist Church and a number of others have chosen to express love, not hate, grace and mercy, not judgment and condemnation, and inclusion, not exclusion. The Association of Welcoming and Affirming Baptists (www.awab.org) is a national body of like-minded Baptist clergy and churches that have chosen to be inclusive of peoples of all sexual orientations. They have issued a call to all Baptists to take a public stand against hate-filled speech such as Worley’s. Further, they are soliciting funds on their website in the name of Pastor Worley with all funds being used to further the cause of welcoming and affirming churches across the nation. Pastor Worley does not speak for all Baptist Pastors or all Baptist Churches. He speaks for himself and perhaps an ever decreasing minority of individuals. There is a growing movement of Churches exploring how to greater welcome and include all peoples in their communities of faith. The writer of that letter to the editor asked why the LGBT community is standing alone. It is not. A growing number of Christians and Pastors are choosing to voice their opposition to hate-filled speech and to stand alongside the LGBT community in the continued realization of what a truly grace-filled, civil, and inclusive society looks like. The LGBT community is not alone. (For more on Worley, see “Cleaning My Closet,” page 22.)

Scholarship or Dollarship? Study on gay parents is political, unscientific, biased By Wayne Besen, Executive Director, Truth Wins Out There are two things we know about the religious right: They have no faith in science, and they cynically distort science to justify their faith. The latest example is a new study by University of Texas researcher Mark Regnerus, “How Different are the Adult Children of Parents Who Have Same-Sex Relationships?” The research will appear in the July issue of the journal Social Science Research with the data purporting to uncover “numerous, consistent differences, especially between children of women who have had a lesbian relationship and those with still-married (heterosexual) biological parents.” The message of this study is that in several categories the children of gay parents are worse off. It is critical to note that this study flies in the face of decades of research that comes to the polar opposite conclusion. While billed as the “gold standard” of science because of its sample size, upon closer inspection it looks more like fool’s

15 gold. What stands out and disqualifies this study from serious consideration is that it is an example of what I call “dollarship,” which stands in stark contrast to genuine scholarship. Dollarship is when right wing organizations provide money to produce subpar studies that back their worldview. We have seen such “research” from cigarette manufacturers, the pollution lobby, and certainly the anti-gay industry. Regnerus’ ignoble effort falls into this category with a $695,000 grant from the Witherspoon Institute and a $90,000 grant from the archconservative Bradley Foundation. Most ominously, Princeton professor Robert P. George is a key member of Witherspoon. George has been affiliated with The Family Research Council and is a founder of the notorious National Organization for Marriage. The chances of a “think tank” tied to George producing a study that shines a positive light on gay parents are about the same as palm trees sprouting in January outside my bedroom window in Burlington, Vt. The appropriate title of this junk science study would be: “Surprise, right wing extremists don’t like gay parents.” Aside from the inherent bias, there were glaring methodological flaws. For instance, the study never bothered to answer the question of how children with LGBT parents fare in healthy, stable homes. What it showed is that kids with at least one parent in a same-sex relationship didn’t fare so well in broken homes. “When I look at his data, my main take-away is that divorce and family transition is not a great outcome for kids,” Gary Gates, a demographer at UCLA, told the New York Times. In The New Republic, writer John Corvino puts the study’s flaws in perspective: Question: What do the following all have in common? A heterosexually married female prostitute who on rare occasion services women; A long-term gay couple who adopt special-needs children; A never-married straight male prison inmate who sometimes seeks sexual release with other male inmates; A woman who comes out of the closet, divorces her husband, and has a same-sex relationship at age 55, after her children are grown; Ted Haggard, the disgraced evangelical pastor who was caught having drug fueled-trysts with a male prostitute over a period of several years; A lesbian who conceives via donor insemination and raises several children with her long-term female partner. Give up? The answer-assuming that they all have biological or adopted adult children between the ages of 18 and 39-is that they would all be counted as “Lesbian Mothers” or “Gay Fathers” in Mark Regnerus’s new study. Researcher Jim Burroway, who wrote an exhaustive critique of the study, puts it this way: “Identifying a parent who has had a same-sex relationship is not the same as identifying a parent who is gay, lesbian or bisexual in a functional relationship.” Earlier work from Regnerus had also raised suspicions of partiality. For example, one study focused on the costs of “hookup culture” and he promotes the silly belief that “liberty run amok can create extraordinary personal disaster.” While peoples’ decisions can lead to disaster, the problem is never the liberty that allows them to make bad choices. Only one with authoritarian impulses would scapegoat freedom as the root cause for poor judgment. Legitimate researchers use the scientific method to explore life’s complicated issues. Junk science practitioners use tainted money to manipulate science as a method to promote an agenda. A cursory look at Regnerus’ work tells me that it needs to be put under a microscope and carefully examined. When one ponders the results, it seems to reveal more about the leanings of the researcher than it does about gay and lesbian parents. ■

national and international ( Transwoman from page 14) claims that the prosecution of McDonald is race and gender-neutral, emphasizing that McDonald’s attack and prosecution are part of a pervasive culture of violence against transgender women of color. They note that Freeman’s responses to CeCe’s broad support campaign only underscore the fact that the criminal legal system provides no real means of securing justice and community safety. Roxanne Anderson, the Director of the MN Transgender Health Coalition and McDonald’s former employer, said, “Today was a shining example of how hate and fear result in racism and transphobia, and how those play out in the courts of our land. I hope people keep supporting CeCe in every way they can, including showing up to the Power to the People tent at Pride, which was created to squash this kind of racism and transphobia.” Billy Navarro Jr. of the CeCe McDonald Support Committee & MN Trans Health Coalition reflected on the fight to free McDonald: “Our victory today is the beautiful community of support that CeCe has brought together. We will keep fighting back against the incarceration of our loved ones and community members. This June marks the 43rd anniversary of the Stonewall Rebellion, which was led by trans women of color, and this year we’ll be celebrating CeCe’s courage and the struggles that women like her have led for decades.” Leslie Feinberg arrested at protest Transgender activist and author Leslie Feinberg was arrested June 4 amidst hundreds of CeCe McDonald supporters protesting outside the Hennepin County Public Safety Facility. Feinberg was held at the Public Safety Facility in downtown Minneapolis and was arraigned June 7. Ze is facing charges of property damage. Outraged supporters took to the streets on June 4, blocking traffic for over an hour in protest of the violent abuses McDonald has faced at the hands of the legal system. Feinberg joined demonstrators in making noise loud enough to be heard within the facility where McDonald was currently being held and marching through the streets in a show of love and solidarity with her and with all incarcerated individuals. Feinberg was the only person arrested, and is excited to draw more attention to McDonald’s story and to the prevalent racism and transphobia within the criminal system. Feinberg has given the following statement: “Many people across the United States and around the world are watching, and history will record what happens on June 4, 2012. CeCe McDonald survived a fascist hate crime; now she’s sentenced as she struggles to survive an ongoing state hate crime. As Martin Luther King Jr. reminded: ‘Never forget that everything Hitler did in Germany was legal.’ “As a white, working-class, Jewish, transgender lesbian revolutionary, I will not be silent as this injustice continues! I know from the lessons of histories what it means when the state — in a period of capitalist economic crisis — enacts apartheid passbook laws, bounds up and deports immigrant workers, and gives a green light to white supremacists’ fascist attacks on Black people — from Sanford, Florida, to Tulsa, Oklahoma, to a courtroom in Minneapolis, Minnesota. “The prosecutor and the judge are upholding the intent of the infamous white supremacist Dred Scott ruling of 1857. The same year Fredrick Douglass concluded, ‘Without struggle, there is no progress!’ “CeCe McDonald is being sent to prison during the month of Juneteeth: celebration of the Emancipation Proclamation — the formal Abolition of ‘legal’ enslavement of peoples of African descent. The Emancipation Proclamation specifically spelled out the right of Black people to self-defense against racist violence.

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 458 • JUly 2012 “Yet, the judge, the prosecutor, and the jailers are continuing the violent and bigoted hate crimes begun by the group of white supremacists who carried out a fascist attack on CeCe McDonald and her friends. “CeCe McDonald is being sent to prison in June — the month when the Stonewall Rebellion ignited in the streets of Greenwich Village in 1969. From the Compton’s Uprising to the Stonewall Rebellion, defense against oppression is a law of survival. “This is Pride month, and we will be bringing the demand ‘Free CeCe — now!’ to the regional Pride march where I live. I believe many other individuals, groups, and contingents will thunder that demand in Pride marches and rallies all over the world — informing millions who take part, and millions more who support. “The prosecution hopes this struggle is over. But it is not over: Free CeCe — now! An injury to one is an injury to all! Come out against racist, anti-immigrant, anti-LGBTQ and sexist wars at home and abroad!” The CeCe McDonald Support Committee states, “Feinberg’s arrest is symptomatic of growing anger and frustration at the disproportionate targeting and abuse of young transgender women of color in our society. The actions Feinberg took were in solidarity with McDonald and all prisoners to let them know they are not alone. Feinberg wants to draw attention to how McDonald is treated as she is transferred to the prison intake facility in St. Cloud, Mn. “McDonald’s case does not reflect an isolated aberration in the functioning of the U.S. legal system, but rather business as usual within a society that has, for hundreds of years, profited from the incarceration and exploitation of people of color and trans/gender non-conforming people. McDonald’s sentencing sends a very clear message to all those following her case across the country: transphobia and racism are alive and well, both in the violent verbal and physical attacks on trans youth of color in the night as well as in the legal system which makes surviving this violence a crime punishable by years of incarceration. Nevertheless, we look forward to joining all of McDonald’s supporters in continuing to fight against these systems of power, for CeCe and for all transgender women of color targeted by the prison-industrial complex.” For more information on McDonald’s case, visit supportcece.wordpress.com.

N.M. Supreme Court protects non-biological moms in custody cases On June 1, the New Mexico Supreme Court issued a decision recognizing important new protections for non-biological mothers who are raising children with a same-sex partner. The Court held that a woman who raises a child with another woman and assumes parental and financial responsibility for the child can be a legal parent under New Mexico law, just as a male parent would be, regardless of whether she is a biological parent. National Center for Lesbian Rights client Bani Chatterjee and her partner, Taya King, were in a committed, long-term relationship and decided to raise a child together through international adoption. Because they could not adopt jointly due to discrimination against same-sex couples, only Taya legally adopted their child from abroad. Although Bani did not adopt their daughter, Taya and Bani co-parented their daughter, and Bani supported the family financially. Bani and Taya eventually ended their relationship after they had lived together as a family for nine years. Taya moved to Colorado with their daughter and tried to prevent Bani from having any contact with their child. Bani filed a petition in the New Mexico district court to establish parentage and seek custody. She argued that she was

presumed to be a legal parent to the child under the New Mexico Uniform Parentage Act because she openly held out the child as her own and established a personal, financial or custodial relationship with the child. The district court dismissed Bani’s case. The New Mexico Court of Appeals ruled that New Mexico law only allows fathers, not mothers, to establish parentage based on these facts, but that Bani may be able to seek visitation as a non-legal parent. The New Mexico Supreme Court reversed the Court of Appeals and ruled that a woman who holds herself out as the child’s parent and has a parental relationship with the child can be a legal parent under New Mexico law, in the same way that a man would be. The Court also made it clear that even if a non-biological parent has not adopted the child she can be recognized as parent, and that once the non-biological parent is recognized as a parent, both parents are equal legal parents under the law and have an equal right to seek custody. The Court noted, “Our Legislature has recognized that there will be many situations in which someone is caring for a child but has not taken any steps to legalize that relationship.” The Court stated that the law recognizes those relationships “because parental rights are not automatically conferred when there is a biological relationship, but rather when an alleged parent has taken the responsibility of caring for a child.” NCLR Family Protection Project Director Cathy Sakimura said, “This is a tremendously important decision for our client and for many other families and children in New Mexico who have created stable, loving parent-child relationships that are not based on biology. The New Mexico Supreme Court affirmed that the parentage statutes must be applied equally to protect children, regardless of their parents’ marital status, gender, or sexual orientation. We are grateful to the Court for issuing such a thoughtful, well-reasoned

opinion that will no doubt serve as a powerful model for courts in other states.” Bani Chatterjee said, “I’m beyond thrilled. It is so wonderful for my daughter and me to have our relationship recognized and respected. After so many years of tension and uncertainty, this will help us all heal and move forward.”

Student plaintiffs in bullying case receive DOJ Pride Month award Six middle and high school students who were principal plaintiffs in the Southern Poverty Law Center’s federal lawsuit against their Minnesota school district were honored June 6 by a group of Department of Justice employees for their role in the lawsuit that forced a Minnesota school district to protect lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender students from bullying and violence. “These courageous students have come an incredible distance – from having suffered as victims of severe harassment at school because they are gay or perceived as gay to a place of empowerment after taking a stand for the dignity and rights of students everywhere,” said SPLC lawyer Sam Wolfe, who led an investigation of the school district following a string of tragic suicide deaths and helped lead the ensuing litigation. Five of the students were in Washington to receive the award at DOJ Pride’s annual LGBT Pride Month program in the Great Hall of the Main Justice Building. Attorney General Eric Holder gave a speech expressing support for gay rights. The students were plaintiffs in an SPLC lawsuit against the Anoka-Hennepin School District that was resolved in March with the adoption of a wide-ranging plan to stop anti-LGBT harassment. “Through our legal action, which was complemented by an intervening lawsuit by DOJ lawyers also present at today’s ceremony, we’ve sent a clear message to

JUly 2012 • number 458 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet school districts around the nation that they must take seriously their obligation to protect students – including LGBT and gender nonconforming students – from harassment at school.” The SPLC and its co-counsel sued the school district in July 2011 for failing to take effective measures to counter a hostile anti-LGBT climate that resulted in students who are gay or perceived as gay being tormented daily with slurs and physical assaults. A gag policy that required staff “neutrality” on issues relating to sexual orientation hindered teachers from effectively intervening and speaking out against such bias and abuse. “I never expected to receive an award in the nation’s capital,” said 15-year-old Brittany Geldert, who joined the lawsuit after suffering abuse and losing a close friend, who was also harassed, to suicide. “I told my lawyer at the beginning that I was willing to do whatever it takes, including, if helpful, shouting from rooftops or putting my face on billboards in order to help prevent the kind of tragedy my school district has faced. We’ve succeeded in making a lot of progress and I’m honored to come to Washington for the first time to receive this award with my friends.” The consent decree reached in March is the most far-reaching ever in a safeschools case. Among many features, it requires comprehensive training for all students, teachers and school officials. The legal action also resulted in the gag policy being replaced with a policy mandating a respectful learning environment for all students. The DOJ and the U.S. Department of Education will monitor the district for the next five years to ensure compliance. More about the students’ lawsuit can be found at www.splcenter.org. DOJ Pride, an association of LGBT employees at the U.S. Justice Department, awarded the students the Gerald B. Roemer Community Service Award for their service to the LGBT community. The award was established in 1998 to honor the life of Gerald B. “Jerry” Roemer who died in 1997. After Roemer received a diagnosis of HIV, he demonstrated courage and hope by completing law school and a distinguished career with the DOJ. The award is presented annually to recognize individuals that have made significant contributions to the LGBT community. The SPLC is dedicated to defending the rights of the LGBT community. The SPLC works to ensure a safe and respectful learning environment for all students – including LGBT and gender nonconforming students – through educational campaigns and legal action. ■

Go to: The Empty Closet pages at www. GayAlliance.org to find the latest news, resources, events! Friend Empty Closet News on Facebook and follow us on Twitter!

Businesses in the Community

Colin Coffey. Photo: Susan Jordan

Renewing Massage By Susan Jordan Colin Coffey opened Renewing Massage, 728 South Ave., in January 2009. As a licensed massage therapist, he offers healing and stress-reducing massage. He also values locally owned small businesses and the contribution they make to the South Wedge economy and to Rochester as a whole. Colin grew up in St. Albans, England, the son of Irish parents. He came to the U.S. (Texas) to get an MBA, and arrived in Rochester in 2006 because his partner Michael is a Rochestarian with family here. In December 2010, Colin became a U.S. citizen and in 2008 he became a NYS-licensed masseur. Colin studied at the Onondaga School of Massage, located in Village Gate. He decided on the profession after being “outsourced” from his previous job. “I went to India to teach information technology,” he said. “I was training the person who would replace me! So I decided I wanted a profession that couldn’t be outsourced!” Massage therapy is now a $13-$14 billion dollar business in the U.S. Colin decided to start his own business because of that and, as he puts it, “I wanted to find a business that would be helping the community, especially the LGBT community. What John (White) and Harry (Bronson) did with Equal=Grounds inspired me. I worked there for a while as a barista – which sounds glamorous but there was a lot of washing up to do!” Equal=Grounds is just down the block from Renewing Massage, which is located in an attractive house with a flowerbed and window boxes. He and his partner also live in the South Wedge. “We love the neighborhood,” he said. “The LGBT business owners have made a big impact. The intriguing thing about the South Wedge is that there is not a single Burger King or other chain store. They’re all locally run and owned. I’ve never lived anywhere where that was true.” The biggest obstacle to starting one’s own business, Colin said, is “having the nerve to do it. The experience of being outsourced taught me that the only job security you have is what your skills are and how adaptable you can be. Running your own business is a good example of being adaptable. I have to deal with book keeping, marketing, health history

records, clean up, laundry, and time management.” He adds, “I love massage therapy. I’ve been having massage therapy for 25 years, and have had massages in Europe, New York, Australia and South America. I specialize in Swedish massage and am about to launch Ayurvedic massage. I do med-

17 ical-based massage, which means treating a crick in the neck or sore muscles – ASL interpreters for instance get sore arm muscles. “Stress reduction is another benefit of massage. LGBT people have a lot of stress. I’ve found it very helpful. It wasn’t just that I wanted to run my own business – I love massage therapy and wanted to combine that with being close to the community. It’s incredibly rewarding because you can see an immediate positive impact. People deserve to have less stress and better health. Massage therapy is good for people of all ages.” One way for business owners to manage their own stress is through having a supportive life partner, Colin says. “Michael is 100 percent committed to this and really believes in the mission. That’s really important – because you have great days and hard days – and you need someone practical to say ‘Don’t worry about this.’” There are three things for massage therapy business owners to remember, Colin said. “The first is, it’s a class D felony to practice massage therapy without a state license. You can’t charge for moving tissue without a license. “Second, to run any business you have to do it out of a building that’s properly zoned for business. The building I’m in is zoned for multi-use commercial. “Third, I believe you should advertise, and spend your advertising dollars where you live and with the organizations you believe in. When you have your own business, you are the CEO and you decide!” Colin is a great believer in supporting the local economy. “If you spend your money where you are,” he said, “100 percent of your money goes to the community – whereas buying online or through big chains sends most of your money away. “I absolutely love Rochester. People here are so nice. The gay and straight communities are both so welcoming, and there’s so much to do here. The South Wedge is really hopping!” ■

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 458 • JUly 2012

Complete Heating, A/C and Chimney Service Large enough to handle it, small enough to care. Now scheduling FREE/Reduced-Cost Home Energy Audits

585-621-2770 www.sparksmonroe.com

$69.00 Chimney Cleaning $59.00 Furnace or A/C cleaning Can not be combined with other offers. Restrictions apply. Must present coupon at time of service.

The Empty Closet is seeking a volunteer who knows flickr and could spend a few hours a month putting together the EC website photo galleries. Call Susan at 244-9030

JUly 2012 • number 458 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

CNY Fertility Pride Open House Thursday, July 12th 6:00 – 8:00 pm Please join with other LGBT community members to learn about how you can fulfill your parenting dreams. You will have the opportunity to ask questions, tour the center, meet the staff & enjoy refreshments. For more information & to RSVP contact: cbutler@cnyfertility.com The Pride Picnic is Sunday, July 15th. We are proud to be a sponsor of this year’s Pride Picnic! Please find us in the Health Pavilion & register to win a Spa gift basket & indulge in a complimentary chair massage.

CNY Fertility Rochester, 2244 East Ave. 585-244-1280 www.cnyfertility.com

A discussion for LGBT community members on how you can fulfill your parenting dreams.

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 458 • JUly 2012

JUly 2012 • number 458 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

Shoulders to Stand On Shoulders To Stand On Reaches $40,000! Thank you, Lt. Governor Robert Duffy and Barbara Duffy! Thank you, Tim Tompkins and his staff at One Restaurant and Lounge! On Sunday, June 3, Tim Tompkins hosted a fun Sunday Tea Dance for Shoulders To Stand On in honor of Lt. Gov. Robert Duffy at One Restaurant and Lounge. Donated flowers from Jimmy Catalano at Kittleberger’s greeted people as they arrived. At 4 p.m., Lt. Gov. Robert Duffy and his wife Barbara arrived. By 5 p.m., 150 people were enjoying the incredible hors d’oeuvres provided by One and the music of DJ Hector. Then Svet took the floor, with his “singing” violin in hand, and entertained the crowd with an exceptional display of talent. Evelyn Bailey, Chair of the Shoulders To Stand On Program, welcomed guests and thanked the over 40 hosts for their support. Anne Wakeman, Interim Executive Director of the Gay Alliance, was introduced to the community. Anne graciously welcomed and thanked supporters for coming, especially the Lt. Governor, his wife and Tim Tompkins. The Hon. Harry Bronson, NYS Assemblymen from the 131st Assembly District, gave a brief history of Marriage Equality, capturing the intense struggle in the final months, days and hours before passage. He praised the out front

and behind the scenes work that Governor Andrew Cuomo and Lt. Gov. Robert Duffy did to bring the vote to the floor of the Senate, and ensure passage of Marriage Equality in New York. Evelyn introduced the Lt. Governor, Mrs. Duffy and Tim Tompkins, who presented the Lt. Gov. with the Shoulders

July, 2012: Pride Around the World July 1-8: Budapest Gay Pride July 5-8: Gay Pride, London July 7: World Pride, London July 5-9: Sitges Gay Pride July 6-8: Cologne Gay Pride - CSD July 7-15: Munich - CSD July 9-15: Fetish Week London July 12-5: Crazy Ball Festival, Rome July 12-15: Skiathos Gay Culture Festival July 20-22: Frankfurt - CSD July 20-29: Stuttgart - CSD July 28-Aug. 4: Belfast Gay Pride Festival July 28-Aug. 5: Hamburg Pride July 30-Aug. 5: Stockholm Gay Pride

Thank You, Tim Tompkins And Our Hosts

Tim Tomkins presents Lt. Gov. Duffy with the Shoulders To Stand On Triangle Award 2012 in recognition of his leadership in passing marriage equality in New York and his continued support of the Rochester lgbt community. Center: Mrs. Barbara Duffy. Below: Evelyn Bailey with Lt. Gov. Duffy. Photos: Jeff Mills

To Stand On Triangle Award 2012, an 8x7x3 crystal pyramid with the inscription “Robert J. Duffy In Recognition of Your Leadership In Passage of Marriage Equality In New York and Your Continued Support of the Rochester LGBT Community”. Accepting the award, Robert Duffy said he was privileged, with Governor Andrew Cuomo, to have played a part in passing Marriage Equality in New York State. The Lt. Governor shared that one Senator did not attend his daughter’s rehearsal dinner in order to be present for the vote. It was that important. The Lt. Governor’s wife, Barbara, said she and Bob believed that parents of their daughter’s friends deserved the same rights as any other parents. The Sunday Tea Dance continued with glitzy starlit performances by Vanity Faire and Keke Velasquez-Lord, with DJ Hector spinning. With the $10,000+ raised on June 3, Shoulders to Stand On reached its goal of $40,000 to complete the videotaping for the 90 minute documentary on the History of the Rochester LGBT Community. Over the next three months, Shoulders will write grants for oral histories, development of a Rochester Gay History website, and an educational kit to accompany the documentary. At ImageOut 2012, Shoulders To Stand On will show a 10–15 minute preview of the documenta-

ry, which will be completed for ImageOut 2013 and the 40th Anniversary of the Gay Alliance. Shoulders To Stand On is proud of and grateful for Lt. Gov. Robert Duffy and Barbara Duffy’s tremendous support of the LGBT community and Shoulders To Stand On. Your shoulders have brought equality and justice for all New Yorkers closer to reality! ■

Marilyn Tedeschi & Vickie Fumia Barbara Moore Bill Valenti Harry Bronson Shirley Bowen & Tracy Perkins Tom Privitere & Dan Gunderman John Altieri Bob Lewis Thomas Warfield Claire Parker Bruce Woolley Jeff Leenhouts Tim Mains Dan Meyers & Jim Pugliese Elaine & Malcolm Spaull DJ Hector Jeff Briggs & Vince Pace Ralph Carter Chris Leighton Emily Jones Matt Haag & Bill Schaefer Richard Sarkis Bruce Gorman Peter Mohr Mark Siewic & Duffy Palmer Greg Winter & Joe Bailey Chris Hildebrandt Tom Ferrarese & Bill Giancursio Jon Arney & Michael Coffey Tony Mascioli Cathy Bunce Todd Perkins & Mark Ritter Paul Scheib & David Emlen Ron Pawelczak & Nino Vitale Bill Kelly & Rick Easterly David Carpenter John Billone Sue Cowell & Marta Maletzke Chris Guarino Norm Horton Michael Keefer David Quick John Williams & Chuck Lundeen Derek Sung Angela Bonazinga & Cathy Lewis Paul Hoffman & Herman Diep Meghan & Michael Mundy Blair Unger & David D’angelatonio Special Thanks To Jimmy Catalano and Kittleberger’s Florist

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 458 • JUly 2012

Columnists The opinions of columnists, editorial writers and other contributing writers are their own and do not necessarily reflect the collective attitude of the Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley or The Empty Closet.

Growing Up things went right By Eric Bellmann No shoeshine boys! They used to be everywhere, the scourge of the tourist. They seemed to travel in packs of three or four, hounding, pleading, harassing and when one spoke in Turkish and said “no,” they’d grin, cry out, “why, no.” It didn’t matter if you wore sneaks or cloth sandals, shoes that required no polish. And if one knew ruder epithets, they’d laugh and be all the more persistent. They were, I understood, rural urchins who had migrated to the cities in search of menial work, a sign of the economic hardships plaguing the countryside. And they were everywhere. When I’d find a bench to sit, worn out from walking, they’d gather nearby, eager for conversation. Their lives were hard, boring and they were clever. They could manage rudimentary conversation in several languages, English and Italian, but also, astonishingly, Japanese. They were terrible and now they are nowhere to be found. It’s as if they have been swept into the sea, into The Golden Horn or the Bosphorus, the two main waterways that bisect Istanbul. I miss them. Their absence is a mystery. Everywhere I walk the streets are immaculate. Small motorized sweepers never cease moving along the open pedestrian walkways. And waste bins! Turks, I used to think, had no sense of civic awareness. I’d see them casually pluck flowers while strolling in a park, then moments later toss them to the ground. Now there are well-tended gardens everywhere and no litter. I am astonished. And in the old city at night small tables would crowd into the narrow streets outside restaurants. The nights are pleasant, everyone dines al fresco. Now, no tables, no chairs. It’s easier to navigate the passageways, but I wonder why this change? The last time I was in Istanbul was ten years ago. I expected there would be changes. Indeed there is a new sleek subway connection from the airport to the center of the city. The surface tram has been extended a couple of miles. There is new construction ringing the city. I’m told there is a tunnel being dug under the sea that will link the Asian side of Istanbul with the European side. There is a new modern Art museum. All good. Less appealing is the proliferation of cheesy souvenir shops. Key chains, key chains, key chains. I cannot find any shops selling Turkmenistan fabrics, which I’ve collected in the past. There seem to be more fast food places. But the small fishing boats that used to moor at Sirkici where people flocked to buy cheap fresh fish sandwiches are all gone. Indeed the area nearby, outside the Egyptian Bazaar, where one used to be able to paw though piles of clothing, shoes, household utensils, everyday useful things, is now barren. Also gone are the tea gardens nearby where one could collapse, sip tea and gawk at the tourist groups, dressed like Easter eggs in pink and aqua warm up suits. Street life remains intense, the fishermen on the Galata Bridge are still there, yet something has changed, the chaos seems tamed, subdued, oddly less vibrant. I wander through the fabled Pera Palas hotel, as famous for its guest list as it is as

the setting of several Agatha Christie mysteries. It has been renovated in spectacular style. Rooms start at $450. Nearby is the Buyuk Londres Oteli, The Grand London Hotel, now also renovated. I stayed there long ago when it was a dump and cheap. The building I once tricked in with a shy carpenter is now an empty lot, soon no doubt to be the site of a boutique hotel. That seems to be the trend now. Small expensive hotels everywhere. If one is to return to favored destinations after a lengthy interval, one must, I suppose, anticipate change. So I wander to the large park beyond the Marmara Hotel where hustlers and lonely gay men used to hang out. It’s the one place that has seen no improved maintenance, the gardens ignored, the fountains dry. Well, my days as a sex tourist are long ended. I’m happy to rest my feet, read a day-old Herald Tribune. The other anxiety was about predators. Canny men who could spot a gay tourist and could be charming and sly and always good looking and they would ask if they could practice their English and then compliment you on whatever. They were never, ever to be trusted. This park is where they hung out and if one was totally bored, one could tease them on, then split. Gone, all of them gone. Before coming back to Istanbul I worried about a number of things. Would it be too expensive? Would I have the stamina to manage its hilly cityscape? Walking here is a greater challenge than San Francisco! I’m pleased that there are still cheap neighborhood places to eat and that with pacing, I can manage long walks up and down hills. The answer to many of the mysteries of change is the new, conservative government. It is responsible for the building, it is responsible for the booming economy, the fastest growing after China. It is responsible for the clean streets, the absence of street dining, the absence of shoeshine boys. When I spend an evening with friends, the parents of former students, a family I’ve known as long as I’ve been visiting Turkey, the retired patriarch sadly says to me, “I want my Istanbul back.” I understand. Email: elbcad@rit.edu

Cleaning My Closet Shocking By Meredith Elizabeth Reiniger I am particularly perturbed that he will herd the lesbians first. Concurrently, there are countless crumbs in my toaster. I believe I must yank out the toaster’s crumb collecting tray. Excessive crumb accumulation is a safety hazard. Leave too many morsels mounded on the crumb collecting tray and fire could consume my raisin bread breakfast. Frenetically I brush away the remnants of my bread feasts. Dislodge sesame seeds. Scrape, scrape, and they all fall down. The white sink becomes a study of browns and tans. A still life capturing the truth of my untidy toaster tray. Most regrettably, the metal innards form a Debris Detaining Ditch. Crumbs fly into that damnable Ditch as bread goes in and toast comes out. Long have I struggled to twist the dishcloth small enough

to swipe out that crumb collection. Today I think: pastry brush. Simultaneously I marvel: it took me a half century to stumble on that solution. Coincidently I worry about a womyn who consumes so much time on toaster thoughts. Alas, a woe, I also notice that the top silver ridge is coated with black goo of raisin remnants. I am thrilled to know the answer: cleanser. Immediately I am flabbergasted. Why would I even consider scrubbing those crannies? Is it because we invited over friends, who are lesbians? Do I really think they will peer into the depths of Cuisinart heating wires, curious about my toaster habits? Or will we all, post-Worley Words, contemplate our legendary membership gift. Will we all gaze at my “Welcome Toaster! You-Are-Now-an-Official-Lesbian.” Will we imagine little slices of lesbian toast trapped between electric wires. Will echoes of the homophobic gospel according to hate-filled Worley Words dance through our heads. Here’s contemptible Charles Worley’s horrific plot, preached from the pulpit in a house of god: “Build a great big, large fence 50 or 100 miles long. Put all the lesbians in there, fly over and drop some food. Do the same thing for the queers and homosexuals. And have that fence electrified so they can’t get out. And you know what? In a few years they’ll die out. You know why? They can’t reproduce.” Really? Well, I feel obligated, at this point, to only dissect his scheme. First the enclosure: “Build a great big, large fence 50 or 100 miles long.” Interesting dimensions… great big, large. Quite long, but how high, how deep? It’s probably too much to expect him and his ilk to use a great big, large lavender chain link. Or a great big, large white picket fence. Here is his round-up sequence that infuriates me: “Put all the lesbians in there….” Clearly this is unfair. Collect us lesbians last… we will have ever so much to do prior to capture… arrange child care, water the gardens, iron our leather vests, get our proverbial cats ready to travel. Disgraceful Worley rants on: “Do the same thing for the queers and homosexuals.” Well then, this just about covers the rest of the candidates for his homo-cide. He clarifies his immoral plot “…and have that fence electrified so they can’t get out.” Will he get a discount if he buys his supplies from anti-Mexican Arizona? Will Charles & Chums goad the caged victims, lure them into grabbing lethal links? Will he, to cover costs, need to charge the gawkers? “Fly over and drop some food.” His words suggest a meal plan designed to perpetuate the incarceration. To torture with airline food. I am sure we really would prefer catered. “And you know what? In a few years they’ll die out.” Apparently only food, not shelter, will be provided in the Wacky Worley Zoo. Then he queries the congregation of partners in crime, “You know why?” I’m guessing exposure to the elements. Suicide by fence. “They can’t reproduce.” Alas, here we have Creepy Charles exposing the failure of his educational experiences. I personally know that many a lesbian has a uterus. Some of those uteruses have even been inhabited. And rumor has it that lots of homosexuals have intact penises with really gay sperm ready, willing, and able to swim up to a crazy-wild egg. And those queers, yes indeed, they have all the equipment needed to procreate. Which subsequently leads to the question of adoption. Some of those babies, created the usual stork-free way, may be heterosexuals. Quite a predicament, for surely Wicked Worley’s flocking churchers believe in some of the ten commandments… like “Thou shall not kill straight kids.” How did all his pitiful parishioners miss the intent of the 11th commandment, the Ethic of Reciprocity: treat others as you would have them treat you?

Clearly, I, a passionate proponent of that Golden Rule, would not suggest that we enlightened New Yorkers build a great big, large fence around Worley’s wedge of North Carolina. True, build we must. Bridges, not great big, large fences. Yes, bridges. Quickly, we must build a great and large support group. We must send electrifying messages of loving acceptance to every lesbian, all the queers, masses of homosexuals, loads of latent homosexuals, and heaps of heterosexuals. Our diverse voices will rise above the inharmonious babble of one hate-filled reverend who preaches genocide. Although, I must admit, I am ordering a giant, great big, large Black and Decker toaster. It will serve as a warning to our most recent bigot to stop spewing malicious threats: do that again and you’re toast. MeredithElizabethReiniger@frontiernet.net

Faith Matters How’s your “gaydar”? By Rev. Irene Monroe Why is Pop Science of late interested in “gaydar”? And do ovulating women have better “gaydar”? What was once considered a myth or anecdotal knowledge is now being lauded as a scientific fact. Gaydar is real! What is “gaydar”? If you’re reading this in a LGBTQ zine, it’s likely you know what “gaydar” is. But for those who don’t, “gaydar,” a portmanteau of “gay” and “radar,” is a person’s innate ability to instinctively know from mere observation that someone’s sexual orientation, or gender identity is heterosexual, gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender. How would you rate your gaydar? (Caveat: being in a gay pride parade is not the best time to assess if you have an acumen for gaydar.) Average to good. Exceptional. Overzealous. Wildly unreliable. Or spot on. Two social scientists assert that they’re spot on when it comes to assessing gaydar. This month in the peer-reviewed science journal PLoS ONE, Joshua A. Tabak and Vivian Zayas published their research findings on the validity of gaydar in a paper titled “The Roles of Featural and Configural Face Processing in Snap Judgments of Sexual Orientation.” And their findings are novel, but spurious in my opinion. Devoid of cultural markers many of us employ in honing in on our gaydar -- hairstyles, clothing, walk, body movements, talk, makeup, piercings, eyeglasses or tattoos -- Tabak and Zayas state that the accuracy in detecting gaydar is driven by a sensitivity to individual facial features and the spatial relationships among facial features. For example, viewing the facial photographs of men and women, and then categorizing each face as either heterosexual or homosexual, Tabak and Zayas’ subjects demonstrated an ability to identify sexual orientation with a 60 percent accuracy, which is quite impressive since chance guessing would yield 50 percent accuracy. To further prove their research thesis that sexual orientation can be discerned by merely facial observation, Tabak and Zayas had their subjects look at photos of men and women presented upside down. And again, the subjects were able to pinpoint sexual orientation. And to no surprise, accuracy in pinpointing sexual orientation increased when the faces were presented right side up. Tabak and Zayas’ gaydar research is built on the work of the social psychologist Nicholas Rule. Gaydar studies are problematic, and Rule’s research, if Tabak and Zayas’ haven’t already, might give you a hint. Nicholas Rule, Assistant Professor of

JUly 2012 • number 458 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet Psychology at the University of Toronto and Canada Research Chair in Social Perception and Cognition, says research teases out the question, is your face your fate? In other words, what can you tell about someone just by looking at them? Hmm? And therein lies the problem with “gaydar studies ” More often than not, gaydar studies are predicated on LGBTQ discriminatory stereotypes, even when based on good intentions. For example, while I couldn’t find photos of either Tabak or Zayas, I did find several online of Rule. And as one whose “gaydar” misses more often than it hits, I would guess that Rule’s gay. Why? Just based on my good intentions that’s meant to be a compliment, but it’s a stereotype nonetheless that Rule’s just too cute and polished looking to be straight. Another example: ovulating women are said to have the best gaydar of us all. In a study conducted with 40 Tuft University female undergraduates, the study concluded that the closer the subjects were to peak ovulation, the better their gaydar. Why? “They just gravitated to the cute ones, and then immediately tossed them into a ‘probably gay’ discard pile — just like they do in real life,” Gawker.com wrote. While many of us LGBTQ people use our gaydar in a tongue-and-cheek way to poke fun at each other, or to brag about our accuracy in spotting each other, we’re basing these assumptions on socially constructed signifiers that are also used to discriminate against us. Using one’s gaydar is no longer the province of the LGBTQ community. Its widespread appeal is also used by heterosexuals. How often have we heard of someone gay bashed because a heterosexual homophobe thought the person he or she targeted looked gay? “Banking on gaydar is problematic because it lets us assume gender and sexual identity of people,” said Allison, a queer woman on Jezebel.com. “BUT it’s many

of us in the queer communities who are just as guilty of buying into gaydar. As much as I could criticize someone outside of the LGBT community for bragging about having accurate gaydar, it’s probably my queer friends who are most adamant about being able to tell who’s gay.” At Pride parades this month, be careful with your gaydar. And here’s why: Attending my very first Boston Pride Parade I spotted a sister who I thought was a lesbian, and unattached. By Brooklyn, my hometown, standards she had all the social markers. Why was she there with her gorgeous self all alone along the parade route I asked myself? When I mustered up enough courage to cross the street to where she was, suddenly her husband and two children came running out of Old South Church. She was watching the parade just momentarily while they used the bathroom. My bad!

A Few Bricks Short The God-Forsaken Country By David Hull If you’ve ever read my column before you probably know that my husband and I live in a somewhat rural area. Or as my mother calls it: “the god-forsaken coun-

try.” “Why do you want to live out here in the god-forsaken country?” she asks when she visits. “There’s no sidewalks, no streetlights, you’re 20 minutes from the nearest store.” “But, Mom,” I tell her. “You live in the center of town and with all the traffic it takes you 20 minutes to get to the nearest store too.” “Well, yes,” she replies with a shrug. “But we have sidewalks and streetlights. It’s not like we live out in the god-forsaken country.” God-forsaken country or not, Bernie and I enjoy living where we do. We live on a generally quiet road (with no streetlights). We have a big vegetable garden out back and on the Fourth of July we have everyone over for a barbecue and a bonfire. On Saturday afternoons I can hang out in my hammock in the shade and read the latest Janet Evanovich novel with very few interruptions, other than Bernie grumbling, “Is my weeding in the vegetable garden interrupting your laying there like a slug and doing nothing?” I always assure him he’s not bothering me in the least! There’s a young couple, Tim and Tiffany, who moved into a gigantic old farm house down the road about a year and a half ago. They’re young, thin and goodlooking – I hate them. For some reason, Tim and Tiffany decided they’d start a little farm. Apparently it’s the hottest new trend with young professionals. Within the last year they have acquired four goats, a bunch of chickens and two ducks. I met Tiffany at the post office recently and asked how all the livestock were doing. “Great,” she said enthusiastically. “But soon we think we might get alpacas.” “Oh, I wouldn’t worry,” I assured her. “With all the medical advances they’re making in science lately, I’m sure they’ll find a cure for that soon.” Color me embarrassed when I got home and Bernie explained that alpacas weren’t a disease, but a domesticated llama-like creature that is raised for its wool. No wonder Tiffany gave me such a strange look when I was attempting to empathize with her! Good thing I didn’t drive 20 minutes to the store to pick up a get well soon card to send to them. This past spring Tim came to our door early one Saturday morning. When Bernie greeted him, Tim apologized for bothering us and asked: “Have you seen my cock?” That definitely got Bernie’s attention. He thought for a moment and calmly

replied: “Not that I can remember. Do you want me to look now?” Tim was confused. “Well, it’s just that our rooster got out of the chicken coop and we don’t know where he is. Can you give us a call if you see him?” “Rooster?” said Bernie. “Damn, this was starting out like a bad porn movie and now you just want me to look for your chicken? Fine. Whatever.” Tim is straight, athletic and hasn’t had a lot of interaction with gay folk. He usually walks away confused any time he and Bernie have a conversation. This was no exception. A couple hours later, I was in the kitchen making a peanut butter and mayonnaise sandwich (don’t even start with me, they’re delicious!) when Bernie looked out the dining room window and said: “Wow! Tim’s cock is huge!” I knocked over the mayonnaise jar, dropped the knife on the floor and tripped over the cat in my dash to the dining room window. “What the hell,” I snarled. “I rush over like a madman and it’s just a big chicken in our backyard!” Bernie then explained what had happened earlier when I was upstairs in the shower. “Wow,” I said. “That starts out like a bad porn movie.” Bernie nodded. “I know, but it’s just about the chicken.” And I did have to admit – Tim’s cock really was huge. Later that evening I stopped over to visit my folks. My mother asked what was new. I decided to give her a little shock. “Well,” I explained. “This afternoon, Bernie and I saw a huge cock in our backyard.” My mother shrugged. “Well, I can’t say I’m surprised. There’s no sidewalks, no streets, that’s what happens when you live out in the middle of the god-forsaken country.” You can contact David at Davidhull59@ rochester.rr.com

Conundrums Maggie Brooks uses your tax dollars to oppress you By Ove Overmyer I believe that deep down inside, County Executive and Congressional candidate Maggie Brooks doesn’t hate people who don’t muster up to her personal standards. However, she can’t quite bring herself to summon up the political courage to do the right thing and face her donor base and say that being anti-equality is not a winning issue for her or conservatives. On top of this, she is certainly willing to spend a great deal of taxpayer money so her administration doesn’t have to put their justification in writing. More specifically, they don’t want to have to justify themselves in a fact-finding brief to explain why they want to marginalize local LGBT families and County workers. And, because of that, I personally will never forgive her for treating poor people, the disabled, public workers and the local LGBT community with such punitive disregard. The Brooks legacy will go down in history as one that afforded opportunities to those who are financially insulated from any harm, while the disabled, middle-class, poor and working poor were left with higher fees, limited services and a lower standard of living. The gloves are now off. You can bet I will exercise my First Amendment rights in support of equal rights and counter her bigotry and anti-equality fervor at every turn. Most people are afraid to express themselves about Maggie’s policies because her reach is far and wide. She intimidates and exercises retribution at a moment’s notice. She wants you to fear

23 her and her cronies -- they do not hesitate to strong-arm anyone who confronts them and will try to make you pay one way or another. Their approach is anything but polite social discourse. Maggie Brooks is smart. She knows that she is on the wrong side of civil rights history and that come November, every voter in NY25 will be asking themselves, “Do I want to vote for an out-of-touch, anti-equality Tea Party extremist?” If you haven’t noticed, ideologically she is not a moderate Republican like she wants you to believe -- she is being pulled by the right-wing extreme forces of a national Party hell-bent on radical Conservative principles, while at the same time trying to win in a centrist district. That’s her conundrum — that’s why it’s going to be tough for her to win. If she is properly vetted, this will all come out in the wash this fall. Yes, it’s a given that she is a master at media manipulation and local talking heads, like her crew over at Rochester’s NBC affiliate WHEC-TV, will spin every word in her favor. You can bet on that one. If she gets elected, look for her to try and keep DOMA on the books forever, repeal the Affordable Care Act and toe the radical House GOP line. Ask her if she supports the GOP House-backed Ryan Budget, which would essentially dismantle our social safety nets and give tax breaks to big oil companies. Are your parents on Medicare? Well, if Maggie gets elected, their health and welfare will hang in the balance. Plan on collecting Social Security when you get older? As my Italian friends say, “Forgettaboutit.” Next time you see her at a ribbon-cutting ceremony or out in public, go ahead and ask her why she uses our tax dollars to oppress the poor, disabled, LGBT and working people. Go ahead, I dare you.

Inspiritual The Lens of Love By Rev. Dr. Sharon Jacobson Whenever I go to the ophthalmologist’s office, they check my eyes to see how my vision is doing. While they are able to see behind my eye and assess all kinds of information about my vision, they are unable to assess how I see people. There is more to our vision than just whether or not it is 20/20 or if we need corrective lenses or contacts to enable us to see better. When it comes to seeing others or ourselves, the only lens we need to wear is a lens of love. How we see others and ourselves is about us and where we are at in our journeys. If we cannot see ourselves through a lens of love, then how can we see others through that lens? The lens of love is unconditional. Some refer to this as agape love, a love that transcends the ability to be frustrated. It cannot be frustrated because there is no expectation attached to it. When we see others and ourselves through this lens of unconditional love, it means we have released our expectations for others and ourselves. When we see ourselves getting frustrated with someone because they have not fulfilled our expectations, it is a signal our love for them was conditional. When others get frustrated with us because we have not filled their expectations, their love for us was conditional. Conditional love always brings frustration and unconditional love always brings fulfillment. It might seem as if it is easier to have that unconditional love, that agape love with some people, in some situations, in some circumstances than with others. However, even then we are placing conditions on love. What we are called to embody, to live, is this unconditional love. A love that says, even if you do not (Columnists continue on page 24)

24 (Columnists continued from page 23) like me, I love you. Even when you reject me, I love you. Even when you say I am not worthy of being loved, I love you. No matter what, I love you. We were each created by love, in love, to be love. Agape love is unconditional, but it is not concerned with foolishness. If you really love someone, you will be considerate of who they are and what they truly need, but you are not going to concern yourself with their fantasies. There might be a real need for three meals a day, but there is no real need for you to be pretending you are living the lifestyle of the rich and famous, when doing so would threaten your financial well-being. That is about feeding the ego and not the soul. Love knows compassion, but no concern. Sometimes love has to be firm, because love needs to be firm. Sometimes love needs to be distant, because it needs to be distant. Sometimes love hisses because love needs to hiss. Whatever the need, love is considerate, but not concerned. Love is not about fulfilling unreal needs or expectations. Love is not about fulfilling anything that is about feeding the ego. Love, learning how to embody this agape kind of love, is not easy. It requires practice and experimentation. It requires that we live with a heightened awareness and understanding of who we are and be in tune with those around us. Love has to become the filter through which we do all things. It has to become the filter through which we breathe, move, think, and act. Learning to love in this egoless manner is not always easy. As a mother, I love my son. Loving Nicholas should not be a duty, it should not be an obligation, and it should just be what I do. I love my son. I am compassionate when he needs me to be compassionate. I am caring when he needs me to be caring. I am firm when he needs me to be firm. I am what he needs me to be when he needs me to be it. I am considerate of his needs, but I am not concerned with the fulfillment of his fantasies. Before we can unconditionally love others, we must learn how to love ourselves. Learning to love ourselves is not always easy, in part because some view self-love and self-acceptance as egotistical and narcissistic. However, what we are talking about is not an unhealthy feeding of one’s ego and fantasy, but unconditional love and consideration for who one is and what one needs to survive. The more I love myself, the more I am able to share

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 458 • JUly 2012 the love I have with others. The more love I am able to share, the more opportunities I have to allow others to experience God’s unconditional love, compassion, and consideration. It is important for us to learn how to love ourselves, because ego cannot survive in the light of love. If you become the light, if you allow the light of love to shine through you, then the light will dispel any darkness. Your love will give you new understandings of the Infinite. Your love will give you new understandings of eternity. The ability to love others unconditionally is related to our ability to love ourselves unconditionally.

NY Gay Wedding Consultant Two June brides By Eve Elzenga Happy Wedding Anniversary! One year ago the New York State Legislature voted to approve Gay Marriage. With this door finally opened to equality, thousands of celebrations of love and commitment took place. Perhaps you were one these couples. That means that you are about to celebrate your first anniversary. Congratulations! I hope that your year has been filled with happiness and a sense of security and relief. With the straight community abandoning marriage – only 50 percent of heterosexual couples are choosing to be married – the LGBT community is leading the way in Family Values! Don’t you just love irony? We were the people who were going to destroy families. Instead, as always, we are leading by example. As I wrote last month, my joy grows exponentially as I help grooms and brides plan previously only-dreamed-of wedding ceremonies and parties. And this month has been no exception. On June 3, two very committed brides celebrated their wedding at Hurd Orchard in Holley. As the clouds broke on that stormy day, Marsha Rifkin and Christine Urban were escorted through the romantic fruit orchard. Standing under a traditional Jewish Chuppa made from Marsha’s grandmother’s pink tablecloth (complete

St. Mary’s Catholic Church 15 St. Mary’s Place 585-232-7140 www.stmarysrochester.org Liturgies: Saturday: 4pm; Sunday: 10:30am

with old gravy stains), the assembled family and friends heard them recite very special vows. Then they each broke a glass and the crowd yelled “Mazel Tov”. As the Hora began to play, the Brides beamed. Finally they were legally married. I say finally because Marsha and Chris met 35 years ago. It is a sweet and intriguing love story. Chris met Marsha one night at a rock concert. It was love at first sight for Chris. They talked. They went to different schools. They exchanged no last names or phone numbers. Chris only knew Marsha’s first name and that she attended SUNY Brockport. Based on this skimpy information, Chris transferred to Brockport in the hopes of finding Marsha. It still took six months before they ran into each other. Talk about a love that would not

waver! In the last 35 years they have been through sickness and health, joy and loss, discrimination, and finally equal recognition of their love. My delight was helping them make a wedding that was as beautiful, meaningful, joyful and fun as the sum of their years together. As more couples seek me out for assistance, I am honored to share my knowledge, talents and experience to make their day as individual as they are. In the month of July I am offering an Anniversary Special two hour consultation for $75. I promise you will leave with a clear sense of your wedding day. Call me at 585 733-2579 to make an appointment. meveelzenga@hotmail.com NYGayWeddingConsultant.com 585 733-2579

JUly 2012 • number 458 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

Community Dignity-Integrity

Rochester Rams M.C.

D-I Rochester meets weekly at 5 p.m. at St. Luke’s and St. Simon’s Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St., corner of Broad St. We have the following services and activities for the month of July, 2012. First Sunday: Episcopal Mass/Healing Service, with music; Second Sunday: Roman Catholic Liturgy of the Word, with music; Third Sunday: Quiet Episcopal Mass in the Chapel; Fourth Sunday: Evening Prayer, followed by a Potluck Supper; Fifth Sunday: Program to be announced. July Pot Luck Theme: “Summer Salads”. If this summer turns out to be as hot as the spring months, we’ll need salads to cool us off at dinner time. Do you have a favorite summer salad recipe? Make it up and bring it along to share! No time to cook? Come anyway and join us! There is always room for more at our table. July means PRIDE and D.I. will be at the Picnic. Watch for us… we’ll have some giveaways at our table… Further details can be found at our website ( http://www.di-rochester.org/) or by calling the DI Hotline at 585-234-5092. And speaking of the Hotline…We thought that the problems with our Hotline were all resolved… that is until someone noticed that our updates still weren’t being recorded as we thought they were. Watch our website while we’re working this out and thanks for your patience.

The Rochester Rams’ annual run, “The Scene,” is being held Aug. 24-26, at our private, secluded campsite just 45 miles west of Rochester. A single low run fee of $150 includes all meals, round-the-clock snacks, beverages, and cocktail parties. The weekend is chock full of leather and fetish events including our annual Saturday afternoon motorcycle tour. The campsite has plenty of room for tenting and parking is available for RVs, although there are no hookups available. If you’re 21 or older and are interested in the leather/fetish community, motorcycles or just want to spend a party weekend with a great bunch of guys, this event is for you. Applications are available on our website, www.rochesterrams.com and at the Bachelor Forum. For further information, email rams@rochesterrams.com. The Rams will be hosting “Undergear Night” on Saturday, Aug. 18 from 9 p.m.2 a.m. at the Bachelor Forum. Show off your boxers, briefs or favorite undergear. The Rochester Rams M.C. is Rochester New York’s foremost gay motorcycle and leather club, as well as being one of the oldest clubs of its type in the country. All who are interested in the leather club scene are invited to check us out. Our general meeting is open to the public and we meet the Wednesday before bar night at 7:30 p.m. Meetings are held at our home bar, the Bachelor Forum, 670 University Ave. Our next general meetings will be held on July 18, Aug. 15 and Sept. 12. For more info, visit our website: www.rochesterrams.com.

Rochester Butch Femme Connection The Rochester Butch-Femme Connection will have two supper events in July 2012. On Saturday, July 7 we will meet at Hong Wah Chinese Restaurant off Route 441 in Penfield at 7 p.m. (located at 1802 Penfield Road, behind Dunkin Donuts and next to the yoga studio). On July 21 we will meet at George’s Restaurant in Panorama Plaza (address is 1601 Penfield Rd., to the right of Tops) in Penfield at 6 p.m. (note time change). For further information on the Connection, contact Kerry/Max at (585) 2887208, email DressyFemme@aol.com or check out our Facebook page http://www. facebook.com/bfconnection .

Rochester Trans Group Our May 26 meeting was quite lively and productive. We had several new people join us. A couple of young people and an older married couple. This prompted a considerable amount of discussion on how the spouse of the transitioning person has to almost transition along with their spouse and that they need to come up with a new form of what their marriage will be. It was also noted that most marriages don’t survive such a

radical shift, although there are also a number that do. Another question that came up was who was the best therapist for gender transitioning. The answer was, it depends; there is actually no one best therapist. The best one would be the therapist that you best “click” with in style and way of thinking. We also talked about marching in Buffalo’s Pride Parade (which we did!) A group of us went to Buffalo and it was amazing, there were hundreds, if not thousands of people on both sides of the street just cheering for us! If you’ve never marched in a parade – DO IT! (The Rochester Pride parade is July 14.) The feeling you get is indescribable. We also will have marched in Syracuse’s Pride Parade when you read this. Since that is on June 16 (the day after The Empty Closet’s deadline) that will be written about in August’s column. We also talked about ideas about what to do with the RTG and the one crucial thing was that we need to have a long term idea of what we will be doing each month for the entire year. So we put together a steering group that will be responsible for coming up with the schedule. The steering group (currently) consists of Maur Delany (also of Genesee Valley Gender Variants or GV2), Mikey Matheson, JoAnne Metzler and you (if you’re interested please send an email to joanne.metzler@gmail.com). And remember to save the date of Wednesday, July 11 at 7 p.m., when the “The Good, The Bad and the Funny” will be the first ever Trans-specific Pride event. It will be held at Equal Grounds Coffee Shop. Maur Delany, Noah Wagoner, Jason Robert Ballard and Shauna O’Toole will share some adventures in transitioning and will moderate an Open Mic for anyone who is Transgender/ Transsexual/Gender Variant and wants to share their own stories. We’ll even have someone to do some singing! So plan on being part of this liberating and

25 empowering event, either as an audience member or braving the Open Mic. It will be a great evening for all trans people! A LOT has happened in the past few months Trans- wise! The Transgender Alliance of Central New York, based on the discussions at the Meeting of the Groups at our April meeting, has created an incredible website! It is located at transgenderalliance. com. Definitely check it out and sign up for RTG, GV 2 or any other group you might be interested in. The National Center for Transgender Equality has a new groundbreaking advance for trans people -- a new guide titled “Know Your Rights: Employment Discrimination and Transgender People.” You can go to the site and print it out at www.TransEquality.org And with that $300,000 grant that ESPA (Empire State Pride Agenda) received in May from the Calamus Fund specifically for advancing GENDA, it seems that this is OUR time! Our next meeting will be Saturday, July 28, 3–5:30 p.m., when we will talk about being trans and dealing with some of the difficulties and also acknowledging the joys that there CAN be in being trans. We meet in the Gay Alliance’s Youth Center, located on the first floor in the Auditorium Theatre, 875 E Main St. Parking is available in the back of the theatre off of Prince St and College Ave. Note: if there is a guard at the booth, just say you’re here for the Gay Alliance and they have instructions to let you in without paying the parking fee. Our website is www.rnytg.org. There are a lot of great people who would like to meet you. Yes, it’s scary to come to your first meeting, only it’s really worth it to meet others like yourself. There’s almost no greater feeling than finding out WOW! I’m not a freak. I’m not the only one who feels this way. WOW! So come on, come to a meeting! ■

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 458 • JUly 2012

The Empty Closet is seeking a reliable, energetic self-starter to sell advertising for a rather generous commission.

Quite simple actually: Sell ads, make money. For information, phone Susan Jordan at 244-9030 or e-mail: susanj@gayalliance.org

JUly 2012 • number 458 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

Arts & Entertainment FuturPointe to perform at Nazareth Dance Festival By Susan Jordan Nazareth College Arts Center will host a Dance Festival July 12-21, including performances by nationally known companies, master classes and more. Rochester’s FuturPointe Dance will be one of the featured companies. Said Susan Chekow Lusignan, director of Nazareth College Arts Center, “This year’s Dance Festival will feature an expanded and diverse roster of headliner events, as well as a wide variety of programs by some of the most popular and engaging regional companies. We’ll open with a dancethemed concert, and showcase performances by one of the most celebrated contemporary dance companies in the country. We’ll present traditional Native American dance-drama and highenergy Latino choreography; athletic, jazz-based contemporary movement, award-winning experimental work, and a crosscultural, multi-media program.

Liam Knighten of FuturPointe Dance.

Audiences will be awed, inspired and entertained.” Only the six headliners – the RPO, LehrerDance, FuturPointe Dance, Luna Negra Dance Theater, Beth Gill, and the Martha Graham Dance Company – are

ticketed performances. Master Classes, Community Dances, the choreographer conversation, pre-performance lectures, and outdoor performances (two “Dancing on the Grass” events on campus, as well as Phoenix Project Dance’s performance at the Memorial Art Gallery) are all free and open to the public. Pre-registration is required for Master Classes: 585-389-2180 or lchasse7@naz.edu. The Empty Closet talked with Liam Knighten, a cofounding member of Rochester’s FuturPointe Dance, about the

company, his life as a dancer, and the work they will present at the Festival. Liam, 24, grew up in New Orleans. He said, “I moved here in 2006 to go to U.R. I took a sabbatical to dance with the Garth Fagan Company in 2008 and danced one season. That’s when I met Guy Thorne (codirector of FuturPointe along with Heather Roffe) and N’jelle Gage. I never went back to U.R.” The four of them co-founded FuturPointe in 2009. While Thorne and Roffe are the main choreographers, Liam says, “Everybody does choreography. We all create together. Our movement is as diverse as the people in our company – Guy is from Guyana and moved to Jamaica; N’jelle is from Jamaica; Olga Kravets is from the Ukraine; Melinda Bly is from Rochester and I’m from New Orleans.” FuturPointe is a “fusion” company; they incorporate movement as well as music from many different cultures and traditions, including West African, tango, dance hall, Afro Caribbean movement, hip hop and

Tom Somerville shows work at Equal=Grounds

break dancing, ballet and Cuban modern technique. Liam says, “We use different types of both music and movement and even the lighting. We want to give a sense of magic. We used mirrors in one dance to give the impression that N’jelle had looked into a mirror and seen her reflection, and then I (FuturPointe continues page 28)

The Gallery @ Equal=Grounds is pleased to present PROUD: New Work by Thomas Somerville, as the exhibit of the month. Tom says, “I am very proud to be chosen as July’s artist at The Gallery at Equal=Grounds. July is a very special month to be chosen because it is the Pride exhibit. I tried to put together a body of work that talks about the things that give me a sense of pride. To unify the work I enlisted a strict pallet taken from the Pride rainbow because the images are not intrinsically Gay. It’s more about how the pieces fit together in my life to create my identity, an identity that is not defined by being Gay, but a world view always seen through a Gay perspective.” Equal=Grounds is at 570 South Ave. Check out the artwork and special deals on ice cream and coffee during “Super Sassy in the South Wedge” on July 6, from 5-9 p.m. ■

action-comedy. An over-thetop cross between comic book superhero and James Bond adventure, “Madame X” is just as irreverent, hilarious, crazy and fun as it sounds. This unusual yet perfect blend of “charisma, uniqueness, nerve, and talent” comes to Rochester all the way from Indonesia. The story starts with Adam celebrating his birthday in style with his friends. But the violent goons of the National Morality Front have other plans, ambushing the gay disco where Adam and his friends are partying. When all the commotion

and glittery dust have settled, Adam’s best friend has been thrown off a truck and killed, while he himself is left for dead. True to most superhero origin stories, a kind elderly couple finds Adam and nurses him back to health (in their dance studio) deep in the rural countryside. Soon enough, he is being trained in the ancient, mystical dance art of Lenggok and slowly transformed into Madame X, a fabulous trans superhero clad in a dominatrixinspired outfit and armed with awesome gadgets to aid in her (ImageOut continues page 28)

Avenue Q puppeteers. The show is at Geva until July 21.

Summer at Geva: Avenue Q, Elton John/Billy Joel Tribute Geva kicks off summer with the Tony Award-winning musical Avenue Q in the Wilson Mainstage until July 21. Welcome to Avenue Q, the outrageous neighborhood where anything goes! Princeton has recently graduated from college and moves into a rundown New York City apartment on Avenue Q. With the help of a literally colorful cast of characters, Princeton discovers his true purpose in life. NOTE: Avenue Q contains mature language and situations and is not suitable for children (but if you bring your teens, they’ll think you’re really cool!). Jeff Whitty (book), along with Robert Lopez and Jeff Marx (music and lyrics) originally conceived Avenue Q as a TV series. The show was developed as a stage production in 2002 at the National Music Theatre Conference at the Eugene O’Neill Theater Center. It opened OffBroadway in March of 2003 and transferred to Broadway four months later, where it triumphed over the season’s other big hit, Wicked, to win the Tony Triple Crown: the award for Best Musical and, for Whitty, Lopez and Marx, Tonys for Best Original

Book and Best Original Score. Las Vegas and London productions followed and the show has now become a worldwide phenomenon. With 2,534 performances, Avenue Q is one of Broadway’s longest running shows and it continues to play as an Off-Broadway production. Incidentally, Rochester has its own unique connection to the creation of Avenue Q. Rick Lyon, the creator of the puppets for the Tony Award-winning Broadway production and one of Avenue Q’s original cast members, is originally from Rochester. This production of Avenue Q, which began performances at Geva on June 28, comes to Rochester from Cape Rep Theatre on Cape Cod where it premiered last season to sell-out houses. Tickets are going fast for this limited Rochester run. The summer season also includes The Tribute to Sir Elton John and Billy Joel. Tickets are also available for that show, which runs from July 27– Aug. 11. Tickets start at $25. For reservations call (585) 232 GEVA (4382), Website: www.gevatheatre.org. ■

From “Madame X”.

ImageOut screens “Madame X” on July 12 at Cinema On Thursday, July 12, ImageOut, Rochester’s LGBT film and video festival, will help kick off the Superheroes-themed Rochester Pride weekend with a special screening at the Cinema Theater. The film starts at 7:30 p.m. Welcome to the world of Madame X, a pre-op transsexual gifted with magical powers, which she uses to combat the forces of hatred and intolerance in this candy-colored, fast-paced

28 (FuturPointe continued from page 27) came out of the mirror!” He added, “Everybody at FP shares the same point of view. Our friendship is at the heart of our work and is the creative force behind us. We enjoy being together so much that we can spend so much time working together.” Liam realized he wanted to dance when he was a child. “It has been a long and sometimes lonely journey,” he said. “When I was growing up in New Orleans, (male dancing) was not supported. So it was a secret passion. I had some informal training when I was young, but in high school at the New Orleans Center for Creative Arts, I did jazz and hip hop. I graduated first in the class. I studied musical theatre and that was accepted because my father was a musician and singing was OK. My parents didn’t know I had become a dancer until my senior recital, when I did a spotlight number of both singing and dancing. In 2009 my mother came to the premiere of FuturPointe and was moved.” In 2011 Liam won the title Mr. Gay Pride Rochester, which he handed over to Tonisio on June 10 (Tasha Brooks won Miss Gay Pride). Liam has been concentrating recently on dancing and choreographing talent numbers for other pageant contestants. “I choreographed the winning number for Miss Gay Rochester, F’ya Colby-Valentino. I’m trying to take my time with choreography; I want to leave people wanting more. I pull my inspiration from the music and from watching people in everyday situations. Sometimes I take my brain out of it and let my body create.” The company will do an hour performance at Nazareth this month. “We’ll premiere a re-work of the second half of ‘Sahdji’ – and will also be doing the first half. The second half now has a more cosmic feel. We’ll also do old favorites like ‘Neo Shaman’ and ‘Tangere’ and a new solo Chris Walker (of University of Madison, WI) has choreographed on N’jelle. It’s a tribute to Rex Nettleford, who taught Chris, N’jelle and Guy in Jamaica.” FP often uses short dance films and mixed media in their work. Liam said, “We’ve been integrating more mixed media in our dances. It’s projected but can also be the costuming – and other things we haven’t even created yet!” Liam’s first great dance inspiration was Alvin Ailey and his company. “I saw his piece ‘Revelation’ in New Orleans when I was a child. I was captured, and that was it.” He added, “We’ll be in the Pride Parade and will perform at the Festival on July 14. Our theme is going to be a surprise! “FuturPointe wants to bring dance to everyone. We want them to see something they haven’t seen before and experience it together, as a family.” ■

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 458 • JUly 2012

Pandora Boxx returns to RuPaul Drag U faculty The third season of “RuPaul’s Drag U” delivers more diva transformations, more drag queens (including Rochester’s Pandora Boxx) and more surprises, as biological women are treated not only to show-stopping makeovers, but also receive once-in-a-lifetime, real-world hair, makeup and fashion tips from the world’s greatest drag faculty. This season continues to deliver fan favorite drag queens, more iconic celebrity judges and life-changing stories as eight new, one-hour episodes premiered on June 18 at 9 p.m. on Logo. “RuPaul’s Drag U” strives to help modern women live their sexiest and most fulfilling lives. However, the road to fabulousness is a long one as each woman is carefully transformed from the inside out. These eye-opening transformations will leave even the most educated viewer with a new respect for the power of drag. The season three faculty includes Latrice Royale, JuJubee, Manila Luzon, Raja, Raven, Shannel, Alexis Mateo, Mariah, Chad Michaels, Willam, Morgan McMichaels, Pandora Boxx, Delta Work and Sharon Needles. Lady Bunny returns as the “Dean of Drag” to dispense her “Lady Lessons.” This season will feature a new batch of visiting celebrity professors including Donna Mills, Holly Robinson-Peete, Angela Kinsey, Joely Fisher, Tamara Taylor, Robin Givens and Tamala Jones. For more information on “RuPaul’s Drag U” and to view sneak preview clips of upcoming episodes, go to LogoTV. com.

New webseries looks at indie filmmakers The upcoming LGBT comedy webseries “Dumbass Filmmakers!” by Hunter Lee Hughes explores the world of indie film. While the show -- which premieres July 10 on DumbassFilmmakers. com -- might sound like a documentary, it’s actually narrative fiction. Hughes says, “Although our title may sound crude, we also compassionately examine the artistic, psychological and emotional challenges of bringing LGBT creative material into existence in a world resistant to hearing our stories.” In “Dumbass Filmmakers!” Dale Raoul (“True Blood”) plays disgusted mom Brenda Winters, whose bisexual son creates art installations and performance pieces she despises. So Harrison DeWinter (Hunter Lee Hughes, “Winner Takes All”) assembles a group of losers to make a transition from wacky installation artist to filmmaker despite his mother’s castrating indifference. The show premieres at DumbassFilmmakers.com on July 10. The naïve Harrison truly believes his movie will inspire others to save

(ImageOut continued from page 27) fight against bigotry. A fun, vibrant and action-packed entertainment, “Madame X” is full of eccentric characters, political incorrectness and camp galore. But behind all the absurdity, “Madame X” offers a sharp commentary on contemporary society, which is all the more impressive knowing that this film comes from a very conservative and predominantly Muslim country. The Cinema Theatre is located at 957 South Clinton Ave. Tickets are $8 and will be available at the door; the box office opens at 7 p.m. Presale tickets are available for $7 (cash or check) at Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave. and OUTlandish Video and Gifts, 274 N. Goodman St. To request ASL interpreting services. please contact the ImageOut Office by Friday, July 6. Please use the relay service at 1-800-662-1220 to make your request. This event is wheelchair accessible. ■

Scene from “Dumbass Filmmakers.”

“The Mirror of Love.”

Bread & Water plans encore production for Pride Bread & Water Theatre is producing an encore production of “The Mirror of Love,” based on the epic poem by Allen Moore, for Pride Week. Originally part of the 2012 Rainbow Theatre Festival season, the production will share the stage with a premiere adaptation of Gertrude Stein’s lesbian poem “Lifting Belly,” creating a “Mirror of Love and Lifting Belly Double Feature” performance of new works based on classic poetry. “The Mirror of Love and Lifting Belly Double Feature” will be presented at 243 Rosedale St. (corner of Monroe Ave. and Rosedale St.) beginning July 13 and running through July 15. Performances are on Friday and Saturday at 8 p.m. and Sunday at 2 p.m. Single tickets range from $6-$12 and may be purchased in person or at BreadandWaterTheatre.org. For more information, call (585) 271-5523. An original BWT adaptation for the stage, “The Mirror of Love” by Alan Moore is an epic poem recounting the history of same-sex love, revealing a hidden side of Western culture through the lives of its greatest artists. Sappho, Michelangelo, Shakespeare, Emily Dickinson, Oscar Wilde, and many others are woven into this visceral piece. Written over 14 years ago, “The Mirror of Love” sprang from writer Alan Moore’s activist heart as a reaction to Britain’s anti-gay law, Clause 28.

Moore is best known for his graphic novels Watchmen, V for Vendetta, From Hell and The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. Often considered the central erotic work of Gertrude Stein, “Lifting Belly,” written to her longtime companion Alice B. Tolkas, reveals a vulnerability and tenderness unexpected of one so famous for her caustic wit. A very brief section observes the hardships of gay estrangement from society, while the body of the work applauds the decision to endure these for love’s sake. Stein was a prolific avant-garde writer who is best known for Three Lives, Tender Buttons: Objects, Food, Rooms and The Autobiography of Alice B. Toklas. A frequent host of literary salons in Paris, Stein was an influential figure in the careers of Sherwood Anderson, Ernest Hemingway and F. Scott Fitzgerald, as well as a close friend of Picasso. “It is very rare for a theatre to take on the challenge of adapting poetry for the stage” says director J.R. Teeter, “Both works have amazing stories to tell and offer audiences a rare glimpse into the world of the poet that should be explored more often.” The cast of includes Amanda McFaul (“Lifting Belly”), Annette Ramos (“Lifting Belly”), Paul Johnstone (“Mirror of Love”), Haven Shea Clark (“Mirror of Love”) and Cassandra Kelly (“Mirror of Love”). ■

the environment, protest injustice and embrace bisexuality. But when it comes to actually making the movie, Harrison can’t depend on his quixotic imagination alone. He turns to Vicki Moretti (Elizabeth Gordon, “Astral Projection Can Kill You”). Harrison feels confident that with Vicki in place, his artistic vision will soon materialize. But

unexpected obstacles arise when Vicki fights to block vulnerable rising star Bobby Tulane (Justin Schwan, “Cutback”) from securing the lead role he so earnestly deserves. Unlike Vicki, Bobby actually understands Harrison’s movie, making Bobby very appealing to Harrison, but very threatening to Vicki’s insecurities. Caught in the middle is mischievous casting director Scott Fleischman (Jimmy Dinh, “America’s Got Talent”), who hopes to somehow profit from the experience. “Dumbass Filmmakers!” explores the irony of an unimportant man’s drive to produce something “important.” Although the character of Harrison is profoundly incompetent at storytelling and filmmaking, his odd genius of inspiring others to believe in his vision creates comedic tension. While Harrison strives – with some success -to connect to an unconscious creative energy, he lacks an ability to process his imagination and is both innocently and tragically clueless at navigating the interpersonal politics of materializing a project in the real world. For more information, go to www. dumbassfilmmakers.com. Viewers may subscribe on Vimeo (www.Vimeo.com/ channels/Fatelink) or YouTube (www. youtube.com/fatelinkproductions). ■

JUly 2012 • number 458 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

Food

Brownies for the Graeter good By Merle Exit I decided to combine my favorite Fairytale brownies with my favored Graeter’s ice cream. I don’t have to tell you why I love Fairytale Brownies. I tried Graeter’s Ice Cream about six years ago when I was in Cincinnati, Ohio. That’s where this small batch French style ice cream is produced. I not only loved the consistency and flavor of the ice cream itself, but it was all about the chocolate chips. Of the name brands, Ben & Jerry’s is certainly not on the top of my list. Each time that I had a flavor that contained some form of chocolate chips, all I seemed to taste was the palm oil. Hey, if I wanted coconut... you know. Ben & Jerry’s isn’t the only brand that does this. The explanation is that you can’t have “real chocolate” in ice cream because the chocolate would be much too hard to bite into. Graeter’s uses a small amount of soy oil which doesn’t take away the chocolate taste. Air goes into ice cream, so if you think you are getting a pint or quart, it’s just the size of the container and not the weight of 16 oz., etc. Graeter’s actually weighs 16 oz. I’m not sure about the weight of Ben & Jerry’s if you were to get a simple flavor without all of the added “candy,” which basically boils down to a lot of added sugar. The way that Graeter’s batches are made is that they are stirring the chocolate “liquid” into the ice cream and the

paddles break it up. That is why the chips are not all the same size. In fact, you get a little surprise of what it is like eating a small chocolate candy bar inside the pint. Mmmmmm.... chocolate. If you were to go to Ohio, you could most likely go to one of the Graeter’s ice cream stores. That was my problem... go online and get it delivered or sulk about the chips in ice cream. It was about a month ago when I was in Stop & Stamp Shop and saw Graeter’s. Had to do a double take and read the label. There was my favorite flavor of Greater’s, too. Black Raspberry Chip! Price-wise it was about the same as Ben & Jerry’s or Haagen Daz when they are not on sale. I called the company and eventually had Rich Graeter on my radio show! I also talked about the additives of guar gum and locust bean that are in most ice creams. It turns out that they are simply stabilizers that prevent the ice cream from forming ice. That brings me to the brownies! The thing with Fairytale Brownies is that it’s almost like eating fudge and they are using Belgian chocolate. So… Chocolate Chip brownie covered with Graeter’s vanilla ice cream and topped with slices of fresh strawberries. I soaked a Chocolate Chip brownie in Chambord and then topped it with vanilla ice cream, Graeter’s Mocha Chip with strawberries and broken up plain Fairytale brownie. I took a chocolate chip brownie, cut it in half and placed the black cherry ice cream in the middle and froze it. Try it… for the Graeter good. ■

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 458 • JUly 2012

The Gay Alliance plays a central role in advocating for the fair and equal treatment of all people, regardless of their sexual orientation, gender identity or gender expression.

Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley

Photo: Owen Zacharias

www . ga y all i ance . org

Ride For Pride Gay Alliance Bike Ride Fundraiser: $12,000 Raised! Thank you to our Ride For Pride Bikers: Benoit Biteau, John Braun, Yovi Bruno, Adrianne Chesser, Kevin Coffey, Chuck Dye, Scott Fearing, Heather Fields, Ed Freedman, Jeanne Gainsburg, Nancy Gardetto, Aaron Gorelick, Bonnie Hallman-Dye, Patty Jones, Bekka Lebowitz, Sara Lynch, Deborah Monette, Zach Monette, Manuel Pena, Pamela Polashenski, Maya Polashenski, Steve Santacroce, Hannah Shelly, Aisha Siebert, Jerome Smith, Jay Theuer, Brigid Waterhouse and Owen Zacharias for taking the time to fundraise, train and ride! You guys rock! Thank you also to our riders who

fundraised for us, but could not make the ride: Jim Petretta, Jose Doty, Jesse McCarthy, Christie Nesbit, Emily Smith, Noah Wagoner and Dontaee Williamson. Thank you to our amazing Ride For Pride support staff: Ethan Borger, Pauline Braun, Todd Gordon, Bruce Ingersoll, Cynthia Marshall, Lisa Nolan, Ana Polashenski, Tallis Polashenski, Walter Polashenski, Bobby Rogers, and Craig and Kellie Ronald. Thank you to our official Ride For Pride sponsors: Freewheelers Bicycle Shop and Cycledelic Indoor Cycling Studio for sponsoring our ride at the $250 level!!!

Thank you to everyone who supported our riders through donations, including: HealthQuest Chiropractic and Progressive Rehab for the three gift certificates and the chair massages for our tired riders at the after ride party! Amiels Original Submarines for the sandwiches, chips and cases of water! Scott Doody and Justin Waas for setting us up with some cold drinks at our after party! Evelyn Bailey of Professional Tutoring Service for donating $100. Park Ave Bikeshop for donating a $100 gift card. Wegmans for donating the beautiful sheet cake with our Ride For Pride logo! Crazy Dog T-Shirts for

discounting our Ride For Pride tees. Full Moon Vista Bike and Sport for the gift basket. Sticky Lips for donating a $25 gift certificate. Special thanks to: John Altieri and Kellie and Craig Ronald for their outstanding generosity in supporting our riders and to Owen Zacharias for the wonderful photos! Our top five fundraisers Jeanne Gainsburg, Pam Polashenski, Aaron Gorelick, Scott Fearing and Ed Freedman! *It’s not too late to donate! Rider’s pages will stay active until September 2012 at http://www.gayalliance.org/ events/rideforpride.html ■

most recent Empty Closet newspaper, as well as a flyer about the GAGV Library & Archives, and many took flyers back with them to distribute to their home institutions. The GAGV Library & Archives is a full member of the Rochester Regional Library Council, which is a network serving libraries and library systems in the five-county Rochester region. In the fall of 2011, the GAGV Library & Archives was awarded a grant from the RRLC and the Ad Council for consultation services and a strategic roundtable session. ■

Goodbye and Good Luck to Bob Owens

GAGV librarians attend Regional Library Council Members of the staff of the GAGV Library & Archives spoke recently at the Rochester Regional Library Council in Fairport. Library leadership team Gerry Szymanski, Tara Winner and Jeff Fowler, along with archivist Pat Finnerty, lead a session called “Pizza and Resources for Patrons Seeking LGBT Materials,” part of the popular “Pizza and…” series of informational workshops at the RRLC. Librarians and students from five different member libraries, including the city

library’s Central and Arnett branches, Greece Public Library, Rush-Henrietta school and the law firm of Harris Beach attended the hour and a half long session. Staff members described the history of the GAGV and the Library; the unique content in the Library’s collections and organizational, cataloging and circulation polices. Archivist Pat Finnerty outlined the connection between the Library and the Documentary Heritage Program surveying the records and papers of dozens of gay organizations in the Rochester area, which are now being placed in archival repositories. Each attendee received a copy of the

By Jeanne Gainsburg The Gay Alliance would like to acknowledge Bob Owens for his incredible passion and dedication to our agency over the years. Bob began volunteering for the Gay Alliance in 1987 as a board member, a columnist for The Empty Closet, and a Speakers Bureau member. He later became board president. Bob recalls the early days on the Gay Alliance Speakers Bureau. “It’s gone from the days when participants yelled and screamed at us to the friendly folks we talk with today. The change has been glacial in its pace, but it is definitely moving in the direction of equality and respect for all people regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity. We just need to keep up the good work.” When he first started, he says he was

Bob Owens.

one of two speakers on the bureau. Bob brought a wealth of information to his presentations, along with a wonderful sense of humor. He would often set the audience at ease early in the presentation with this comment, “For those of you who are waiting for me to stand so you can see me better, the bad news is, I’m already standing.” Bob and his partner are moving to Albany to the College of St. Rose, where he will be an associate professor of Communication Sciences and Disorders. We will miss Bob’s leadership and excellent skills, but wish him the best of luck in his new position. ■

The Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley: is a non-profit agency, dedicated to cultivating a healthy, inclusive environment where lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans-gender (LGBT) people are safe, thriving and enjoying equal rights. We are a coalition of individuals and groups working to empower LGBT people, to affirm their identities, and to create an atmosphere where the diversity of our community can thrive both collectively and separately. We educate and advocate for civil rights for all and for the eradication of homophobia. • Address: 875 East Main Street, Rochester, New York 14605 Hours: Mon.-Fri., 9 am-5 pm • Phone: (585) 244-8640 • Fax: (585) 244-8246 • Web: www.gayalliance.org Board President: John Altieri • Interim Executive Director: Anne Wakeman • Education and Outreach Director: Scott Fearing Director of Intergenerational Programs: Kelly Clark • Outreach: Jeanne Gainsburg The Empty Closet: Editor: Susan Jordan • Graphic Designer: Jim Anderson Phone: (585) 244-9030 • Fax: (585) 244-8246 • Advertising: (585) 244-9030 • E-mail: emptycloset@gagv.us

JUly 2012 • number 458 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

On-line Resource Center

Library & Archives Internet Access? The Gay Alliance Library has internet access available during library hours: Monday and Wednesday: 6-8pm Rev. Jim Mulcahy

The Gay Alliance On-Line Resource Directory (GARD) The online community tool providing local, statewide and national resources, 24/7 at www.GayAlliance.org.

Beyond Gay Pride: July 5 event takes place at JCC By Scott Fearing Gay Pride marches and festivals happen all over the world, but not all of them are filled with rainbows. Many of them are acts of courage in which participants face opposition and violence. As Rochester prepares to celebrate Pride, this evening will encourage participants to pause and reflect upon how lucky we are to be able to celebrate Pride, as we also pause to honor those who have been silenced or lost their lives trying to be out. July 5, 6 p.m.: The Jewish Community Center and the Gay Alliance invite you to tour the traveling exhibit from the US Holocaust Memorial Museum to learn how the Nazi party, a democratically elected government, destroyed the burgeoning homosexual equality movement of the early 20th century through harassment, arrest, and imprisonment of an estimated 100,000 gay men. 7 p.m.: Seven minutes of the 1919 film, “Different from Others,” which is described as “a fascinating time capsule, a cinematic plea for tolerance and change.” The clip we will view features Dr. Magnus Hirscheld delivering a lecture to a meeting of medical professionals for full LGBT equality. Almost 100 years old, his words remain relevant today. 7:15 p.m.: '”Beyond Gay – The Politics of Pride,” a comprehensive look at today’s most courageous Pride events. The documentary follows the Vancouver Pride Society’s (VPS) Parade Director Ken Coolen as he travels to places where Pride is still steeped in protest and danger. He is reminded of the true meaning of Pride as he personally experiences vicious and rampant homophobia. As a counter, he also travels to Sao Paulo, Brazil for the world’s largest Pride event (4.5 million in 2012) and New York City, the birthplace of the modern gay liberation movement. 8:30 p.m.: Join our special guest, Father Jim Mulcahy, formerly of MCC Open Arms. Jim is returning to Rochester after several months in the former Soviet Republic of Ukraine working with and for LGBT people; he hopes to move there permanently in 2013. He will share his personal experience of facing dangers and hostility in a land where Pride “dare not speak its name.” The Kiev Pride March in May was disrupted by homophobic violence and police refused to protect marchers. ■

The Empty Closet is seeking a volunteer who knows flickr and could spend a few hours a month putting together the Empty Closet website photo galleries. Call Susan at 244-9030

on The computers are part of our David Bohnett Cyber Center

GARD

Join Rainbow Sage at the Gay Alliance Senior Center on Souper Mondays and Trending Tuesdays from 11am to 3pm.

Alliance Youth The Gay Alliance offers Youth Services for Rochester area LGBTQ and allied youth ages 13-23 Check out what’s happening at: www.gayalliance.org or contact: KellyC@gayalliance.org

The Gay Alliance Rainbow SAGE dance took place on May 25. Photo: Beth Bloom

People the Gay Alliance reached in June 2012 6/5 Creating and LGBT Culturally Competent Environment at the Crime Victim’s Conference 6/5 Identifying the Primary Aggressor at the Crime Victim’s Conference 6/5 LGBT Cultural Competence at Hobart and William Smith 6/6 LGBT Youth Issues at the Center for Teen Empowerment 6/6 SpeakOUT Training at Excellus BCBS 6/8 Bullying and LGBT Youth Issues at the Bullying Prevention Conference 6/19 LGBT Seniors Training at the JCC 6/20 Transgender Issues at Corning Evaluation of the month: “Dynamic presentation! Clear verbal skills, awareness of material, engaged the entire room!” * We are currently accepting presentation requests for the late summer and early fall of 2012. If you would like to schedule a training at your workplace, school, clinic or faith community, please submit your request here: http://www.gayalliance.org/education-request.html

Summer Hours: Wednesdays: 2-5pm Tuesday Teen Group: Ages 13-18: 6-7:30pm Special Interest: Transgender Youth, Arts/Crafts, Movies, Writing Special Events: Youth Dances, Day of Silence, Big Gay Prom, Pool Table, LGBTQ Youth Library, and Internet Access Fun, friendly, safe adults are needed to volunteer their time and talents, providing positive role models, maybe sharing a talent or skill. Contact Jeanne Gainsburg, Outreach Coordinator for an application: jeanneg@gagv.us or 585-244-8640, ext. 14.

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 458 • JUly 2012

Resources

HIV testing on walk-in basis, Tuesdays, Wednesdays 1-4pm, provided through NYSDOH. Thursdays 1-4pm at Aenon Baptist Church, 175 Genesee St.

Check our monthly and ongoing calendar as well as the community section for more groups and events. For further information, call the Gay Alliance at 244-8640 or visit: www.gayalliance.org. And send us your information.

BISEXUALITY resourses

AMBI Los Angeles; American Institute of Bisexuality (Journal of Bisexuality); Bay Area Bisexual Network; Bi Café; Bi Definition: Milwaukee; BiNet USA; Bisexual Organizing Project (BOP); Biversity Boston; Boston Bisexual Women’s Network; ComBIne - Columbus, Ohio; Dallas/ Fort Worth Bi Net; Fenway Health’s Bi Health Program; Los Angeles Bi Task Force; New York Area Bisexual Network; Robyn Ochs’s site; Seattle Bisexual Women’s Network; The Bi Writers Association; The Bisexual Resource Center (email brc@biresource.net)

CULTURAL

Rochester Women’s Community Chorus 234-4441. (See Ongoing calendar).

deaf services

Advocacy for Abused Deaf Victims Mailing address: c/o ASADV, P.O. Box 20023, Rochester, NY 14602. 24-Hour Hotline: ASADVhope@gmail.com; VP: 866-936-8976; TTY/ FAX : 585-232-2854. Lilac Rainbow Alliance for the Deaf (LRAD) Meets second Saturdays, 6-9pm. For location, information: rcoaster@rochester.rr.com Spectrum LGBTIQ & Straight Alliance RIT/NTID student group. <SpectrumComment@groups.facebook.com

family

CNY Fertility Center Integrative Fertility Care. Support meetings, webinars, workshops. Information: cbriel@cnyfertility.com; www.cnyhealingarts.com

Contact Information: Website: www.acRochester.org. Main Office: 259 Monroe Ave., Rochester, NY 14607; Main Phone: 585-545-7200, Health Services After Hours: 585-258-3363; Case Management After Hours (Lifeline): 585275-5151; Fax: 585-244-6456. Finger Lakes Office: 605 W. Washington St., Geneva, NY 14456, 315-781-6303. Southern Tier Office: 122 Liberty St. Box 624, Bath, NY 14810 607776-9166. The Health Outreach Project: 416 Central Ave., Rochester, NY 14605; 585-4545556. Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley Referrals to physicians and service agencies. (585) 244-8640; www.gayalliance.org. Victory Alliance University of Rochester Medical Center. One of several research sites worldwide that comprise the HIV Vaccine Trials Network. Rochester site conducts research vaccine studies sponsored by National Institutes of Health (NIH). 585-7562329; www.vaccineunit.org. Threshold At The Community Place, 145 Parsells Ave., third floor, 585-454-7530. Provides confidential HIV, STD testing and General Health Care, ages 12-25. Sliding fee scale, no one denied, most insurances accepted. Mon., Wed., Fri. 9am-5pm; Tues., Thurs., 9am-7pm; Sat. 10am-2pm. www.ThresholdCenter.org Center for Health and Behavioral Training of Monroe County 853 Main St., Rochester 14611. Collaboration of Monroe County Health Department and U.R. Provides year-round training in prevention and management of STDs, HIV, TB and related issues, such as domestic violence and case management. (585)753-5382 v/tty.

Rochester Gay Moms’ Group Support group for lesbian mommies and wannabe mommies in Rochester and surrounding areas. Subscribe: RochesterGayMoms-subscribe@yahoogroups.com.

Planned Parenthood of the Rochester/ Syracuse Region 114 University Ave., Rochester, NY 14605; Tollfree Helpline: 1 866 600-6886. Offers confidential HIV testing and information. When you make your appointment, be sure to ask about our sliding scale fees. No one is turned away for lack of ability to pay.

Lesbian & Gay Family Building Project Headquartered in Binghamton and with a presence throughout Upstate NY, the Project is dedicated to helping LGBTQ people achieve their goals of building and sustaining healthy families. Claudia Stallman, Project Director, 124 Front St., Binghamton, NY 13905; 607-7244308; e-mail: LesGayFamBldg@aol.com. Web: www.PrideAndJoyFamilies.org.

Rochester Area Task Force on AIDS A collection of agencies providing a multiplicity of resources and services to the upstate New York community. Their offices are located through the Finger Lakes Health Systems Agency, which also provides medical literature and newspaper clippings, as well as demographic and statistical data for use in developing health care services. (585) 461-3520.

Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) PFLAG’s threefold mission: supporting parents and family members in coming out process; educating the community; advocating on behalf of LGBT family members. Regular meetings: Third Sunday of the month, Open Arms MCC, 740 Marshall Rd. 14624. 1-3pm. PFLAG@ gagv.us; 585-244-8640 x27.

MOCHA Center of Rochester Our mission is to improve health and wellness in communities of color through intervention and service, with emphasis on LGBTQ programming. Youth drop-in center, HIV testing, peer education, support groups, computer lab, referral services and more. 107 Liberty Pole Way (corner of Pleasant). (585) 420-1400.

Adoptive Parent Support Group Monthly potluck lunches. For information, location, call Shari, 350-2529. Angel Food Ministry Box of fresh/frozen food for $30 in advance. Menu changes monthly. For information and distribution sites, call 585 861-4815.

HIV/AIDS

Free testing for HIV exposure is available from New York State Department of Health: call Rochester Area Regional Hotline at (585) 423-8081, or 1 800 962-5063 for pay phones or calls outside Rochester. Deaf or hearing impaired people should call (585) 4238120 (TDD.) New Rapid HIV Testing now available in 30-40 minutes! Statewide information can be obtained by calling 1 800 541-AIDS. Other organizations which provide AIDS-related services are as follows: AIDS Care AIDS Care is the leading provider of HIV/AIDS services in Rochester and the Finger Lakes. On-site services include HIV testing and limited STD screenings, Primary and HIV Specialty Medical Care, Pharmacy, and many more. AIDS Care satellite offices in Geneva and Bath. AIDS Care is also a leader in providing services and education to members of the LGBT community.

Monroe County Health Department at 855 W. Main St., offers testing and counseling for HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases. (585) 753-5481. Strong Memorial Hospital provides a complete range of HIV medical care, including access to experimental treatment protocols, and HIV testing. Also provides individual and group psychotherapy. Training of health care professionals also available. Infectious Disease Clinic, (585) 275-0526. Department of Psychiatry, (585) 275-3379. AIDS Training Project, (585) 275-5693. Planned Parenthood of Rochester and Genesee Valley Offers testing and information (585) 546 2595. Rural HIV testing Anonymous and confidential, in Allegany, Livingston, Ontario, Schuyler, Seneca, Steuben, Wayne or Yates Counties, call 1 800 9625063. Action Front Center (Action for a Better Community.) Provides HIV prevention education and case management services. Training and technical assistance to service providers. Resource library open to public. All services free and confidential. Multicultural and bilingual staff. 33 Chestnut St., second floor. Hours 8:30-5pm, Monday-Friday. 262-4330; fax 262-4572. Free anonymous

Anthony L. Jordan Health Center Prevention & Primary Care Program Provides Medical Case Management, Mental Health, Primary Care, HIV Counseling and Testing using the Orasure Rapid Test, Education presentations, and access to other Jordan services. Prevention & Primary Care is a walk-in program; no appointments necessary. Office hours: Mon.– Fri., 8:30am– 5 pm: extended hours on Monday until 8pm. (585) 423-2879; fax (585) 423-2876. Website: www.jordanhealth.org. For more information, call Program Director Patrick M. Trevor, (585) 423-2879. CDC National STD and AIDS Hotline 1-800-CDC-INFO (800-232-4636) 24 hours a day. TTY service: 1-888-232-6348. E-mail address: cdcinfo@cdc.gov. Fair Housing Enforcement Project of Monroe County 585-325-2500; 1-800-669-9777. Deals with housing discrimination on basis of race, orientation, HIV status, etc. Public Interest Law Office of Rochester 80 St. Paul St., Suite 701. Free legal services to HIV positive persons, families. Spanish bilingual advocates available. All civil cases except divorce; no criminal cases. Ask to speak to someone in PILOR. 454-4060. Evergreen Health Services, Buffalo Primary care, HIV and family care, HIV testing and counseling. (716) 847-0328 Westside Health Services Brown Square Health Center, 175 Lyell Ave. (254-6480); Woodward health Center, 480 Genesee St. (436-3040). HIV/AIDS services, support, more. McCree McCuller Wellness Center at Unity Health’s Connection Clinic (585) 368-3200, 89 Genesee St., Bishop Kearney Bldg., 3rd floor. Full range of services, regardless of ability to pay. Caring, confidential and convenient. Catholic Charities AIDS Services A multicultural and bi-lingual staff providing services to a diversity of people infected and affected with HIV. Coordinates HOPWA (Housing Opportunities for People with AIDS) short term emergency assistance with rent/mortgage/utility payments and limited subsidized housing. 1945 E. Ridge Rd., Suite 24, Rochester NY 14622. (585) 339-9800. Huther Doyle 360 East Ave., Rochester 14604. Offers drug, alcohol prevention, education, treatment. Risk Reduction Plus Team offers services to HIV positive and those at risk through substance use. Programs include outreach, transitional case management, free cconfidential testing (OraQuick Rapid Testing). NYS Dep’t. of Health offers free on-site confidential and anonymous testing. (585)325-5100, M-F 8am-9pm, www. hutherdoyle.com. Geneva Community Health 601 W. Washington St., Geneva. Provides HIV testing, HIV specialty and primary care for residents of Ontario and surrounding counties. Mon.-Thurs. 9am-5pm; Fridays 9am-noon. 315-781-8448.

lgbt health

For a list of LGBT-friendly and competent health and human service providers in the Rochester and Finger Lakes area, visit the resource directory page(s) at www.everybodysgood.com. Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley See www.gayalliance.org Resource Directory under “Health” for Gay Alliance referrals to physicians and service agencies.

TRANSGENDER

Rochester Trans Group Social/educational group for gender variant people and friends. Last Saturday, 3-5pm, GAGV Youth Center, first floor, 875 E. Main St. 244-8640. www.rnytg.org Youth Trans Group First Thurs. 6-7pm GAGV Youth Center, ages 13-23. jessc@gayalliance.org; 244-8640, x 13 Genesee Valley Gender Variants Thurs. 7-9pm, Equal Grounds, 750 South Ave. GVGenderVariants@yahoogroups.com Transgender online: Transenough.com; www.endtransdiscrimination.org; genderfork.com; www.transgendercare.com; International Foundation for Gender Education Gender Education and Advocacy http://www.gender.org/; FTM Information Network http://www.ftminfo.net/; Transgender at

Work http://www.tgender.net; PFLAG Transgender Network http://community.pflag.org/ page.aspx?pid=380; TransActive http://www. transactiveonline.org; The Transitional Male http://www.thetransitionalmale.com/; National Center for Transgender Equality http://transequality.org/; New York Association for Gender Rights Advocacy http://www.nyagra.com/; Transgender Aging Network http://forge-forward.org/aging/; Transgender Law Center http://transgenderlawcenter.org; Transgender Legal Defense and Education Fund http://transgenderlegal.org/; The Self Made Men http:// theselfmademen.webs.com/ (please send us your favorite sites/groups) Guys Night Out Social group for transmen. Third Saturdays, 1pm, Equal Grounds, 750 South Ave. tguysnightout@gmail.com

Women

Highland Hospital Breast Imaging Center 500 Red Creek Drive, Rochester 14623; 585487-3300. Specializing in breast health, diagnostic breast imaging and treatment and mammography outreach and education. Breast Cancer Coalition of Rochester 840 University Ave.; 585-473-8177; www. bccr.org; email: info@bccr.org. Breast Cancer Coalition provides support services that include programs designed to help those coping with a recent breast cancer diagnosis and those coping with an advanced breast cancer diagnosis, such as the Advanced Breast Cancer Support Group to support women living with metastatic breast cancer. Information about breast cancer, lending library, a monthly educational program. All BCCR programs, support services free. Monroe County Women’s Health Partnership 111 Westfall Rd., Rochester NY 14692; (585) 274-6978. Comprehensive breast cancer screening services for uninsured and underinsured women. Elizabeth Wende Breast Clinic 170 Sawgrass Drive. 442-8432. Dr. Wende Logan-Young and an all-woman staff provide mammograms. Self Help for Women with Breast or Ovarian Cancer (SHARE) 1-866-53SHARE or 1-866-537-4273. Alternatives for Battered Women 232-7353; TTY 232-1741. Shelter (women only), counseling. Lesbians, gay men welcome. GAGV Anti Violence Project 585-244-8640 ext 19. For women and men. Victim Resource Center of Wayne County Newark N.Y. Hotline 800-456-1172; office (315)331-1171; fax (315)331-1189. Mary Magdalene House Women’s outreach center for HIV positive women and women at risk. 291 Lyell Ave. Open Mon-Fri. 6:30-9:30pm 458-5728. Planned Parenthood of the Rochester/ Syracuse Region 114 University Ave., Rochester, NY 14605; Tollfree Helpline: 1-866-600-6886. Planned Parenthood has led the way in providing high quality, affordable reproductive health care since 1916. All services are confidential. Accept most insurances; including Medicaid. You may qualify for low- to no-cost family planning services. When you make your appointment, ask about our sliding scale fees. No one turned away for lack of ability to pay. Women’s Resource Center YWCA, 175 N. Clinton Ave. 546-7740.

JUly 2012 • number 458 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

Ongoing Calendar Monday

Occupy Rochester M-F, 4-6 pm, at the Liberty Pole. Born That Way Formerly 3rd Presbyterian LGBT Support Group. First, 3rd Mondays, 7:30-9:30pm, 34 Meigs St. Carol, 482-3832 or Kaara, 654-7516. Lilac Squares Gay Square Dance Group, Mondays, 7pm, 140 Alex Bar. To reserve space: 467-6456; bdaniels@frontiernet.net. Free syphilis testing AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave., 5-8pm. 4422220. Rainbow SAGE Souper Mondays, 11am-3pm, Gay Alliance Center, 875 E. Main St., 1st floor. Rochester Historical Bowling Society 7:15pm, Mondays. Clover Lanes, 2750 Monroe Ave. (Group is full.) HIV Positive Men’s Support group Every Monday, 5pm, AIDS Care Center for Positive Living, 259 Monroe Ave. Frontrunners/Frontwalkers Mondays, 6pm, George Eastman House parking lot. www.rochesterfrontrunners.org. Steps Beyond Stems Crack Support Group, Mondays, 7-8pm, 289 Monroe Ave. Gay Alliance Library & Archives, David Bohnett Cyber Center Every Monday. 1-3pm; 6-8pm. First floor, 875 E. Main St. 244-8640. Equality Rochester 2nd Mondays, 7-8:30 pm, Equal=Grounds. 426-0862; annetischer1@gmail.com

Tuesday

New Freedom New Happiness AA Gay meeting, 7pm, Unitarian Church, 220 Winton Rd. Men and women. Open. Support Group for Parents who have lost Children First, 3rd Wednesdays, 11am-12:30pm, Third Presbyterian Church, 4 Meigs St. Genesee Region Home Care. Free. 325-1880 COAP Come Out and Play. Wednesday game nights. 8-11 pm. Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave. 7pm, paulkaseman@gmail.com. Rochester Rams General Meeting 2nd Wednesdays, 7:30pm, Bachelor Forum, 670 University Ave. www.rochesterrams.com Brothers Keeper Support group for men over 30. Third Wednesdays, 5:30-7:30pm, MOCHA Center, 107 Liberty Pole Way. 420-1400 HIV+ Mixed Men’s Group Wednesdays, 11:30 am-12:30 pm. AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave. Gay Alliance Youth Summer Drop-In Hours Wednesdays, 2-5pm, Gay Alliance Youth Center, 875 E. Main St. Prince St. entrance, first floor. 244-8640 x 13. Frontrunners/Frontwalkers 6pm, Eastman House parking lot. www.rochesterfrontrunners.org. Gay Alliance Library & Archives, David Bohnett Cyber Center Every Wednesday. 6-8pm. First floor, 875 E. Main St. 244-8640. Empire Bears Every Wednesday. 6pm dinner at The Wintonaire. www.empirebears.com

Thursday

Wednesday

Presbyterians for Lesbian and Gay Concerns 6:30pm, first Thursday. Ralph, 271-7649 Queer Radical Reading Group First and third Thursdays, 7pm, Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave. Pride at Work First Thursdays, 5:30pm. 167 Flanders St. off Thurston Rd. 426-0862. GLOB&L (Gays & Lesbians of Bausch & Lomb). Meets every third Thursday in Area 67 conference room at the Optic Center. Voice mail: 338-8977 Rochester Gay Men’s Chorus Downtown United Presbyterian Church, 121 N. Fitzhugh St. 6:30-9pm, 423-0650 Free confidential walk-in HIV testing Every Thursday night, 5-8pm, AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave. 442-2220 MOCHA/Gay Alliance Youth Trans Group First Thursdays, 5-7pm, Gay Alliance Youth Center, 875 E. Main St., 1st floor (Prince St. entrance). 244-8640 ext 13. Out & Equal Second Thursdays Social/business networking, 5:30-7:30pm. Changing venues. E-mail: fingerlakes@outandequal.org

U.R. Pride Network 7:30pm, Gamble Room in Rush Rhees Library. urpride@gmail.com

FRIDAY

Just Us Guys Gay men of all ages. 2nd Tuesdays, 6:30pm, AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave. 223-2629 Charlie’s Group 2nd Tuesdays. Monthly peer-facilitated support group for married men who have sex with men. Confidential, free. For time, place: email: charlie@gayalliance.org. Rainbow SAGE Trending Tuesdays, 11am-3pm, Gay Alliance Center MOCHA Youth Drop-In Tues.-Fri., 1-9pm, MOCHA Center, 107 Liberty Pole Way, 420-1400; 244-8640 MOCHA Hepatitis Clinic Free Hepatitis A & B vaccinations, third Tuesdays, 5:30-7pm, 107 Liberty Pole Way, 4201400 Women’s Community Chorus Rehearsals each Tuesday, 6:30-9pm, Downtown United Pres. Church, 121 N. Fitzhugh Street. 234-4441, www.therwcc.org Free HIV Testing 9am-7pm. AIDS Care, 259 Monroe Ave.

Rainbow SAGE Ruby Slippers Wednesdays, 5:45 pm, Callan-Harris Physical Therapy, 1328 Universty Ave. Gay Alliance Board of Directors Meets Third Wednesdays, 6pm, 875 E. Main St. 244-8640

Gay Men's AA meeting Fridays, 7:30-8:30pm, Closed meeting. Emmanuel Baptist Church, 815 Park Ave. GLBTQI Motorcycle Group Second Fridays, 5:30pm, Various locations. RochesterGLBTIQbikers@yahoo.com; 4676456; bmdaniels@frontiernet.net.

L.O.R.A. Potluck & Games Night Fourth Fridays. GAGV Youth Center, 875 E. Main St., 1st floor 6-9:30pm, 585-313-3037; E-mail: info@l-o-r-a.com. http://www.facebook.com/L.O.R.A.14464; www.l-o-r-a.com Womyn’s Drum Circle Fourth Fridays. 6-9:30pm, GAGV Youth Center; E-mail: info@womynsdrumcircle.org; Website: www.womynsdrumcircle.org.

SATURDAY

Rochester Rams Bar Night Third Saturdays, 8pm-2am, Bachelor Forum, 670 University Ave. 271-6930 Rochester Trans Group Social/educational group for gender-variant people, friends. Last Saturdays, 3-5 pm, GAGV Youth Center, first floor, 875 E. Main St. Frontrunners/Frontwalkers 9am, George Eastman House parking lot.www. rochesterfrontrunners.org. Empire Bears Potluck 2nd Saturdays, Youth Center, 875 E. Main, 1st floor, Prince St. entrance. 6:30pm greet; 7pm dinner. Bring dish to pass. www.empirebears.org. Cross Dresser Support Group First Saturdays, 6-9pm, call for location: 251-2132; RCDNET@hotmail.com Guys Night Out Third Saturdays. Social group for transguys. 1pm, Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave. tguysnightout@gmail.com. Saturday Night Special Gay AA 7pm, Unitarian Church, 220 Winton Rd., S. Men and women. Open meeting. Lilac Rainbow Alliance for the Deaf (LRAD) 2nd Saturdays, 6-9pm. rcoaster@rochester.rr.com Sophia’s Supper Club First and third Saturdays. http://www.inspiritual.biz/online-spiritual-evolution-gro/

Sunday

Parents Families & Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) 3rd Sundays, 1-3pm. Open Arms MCC, 740 Marshall Rd. 244-8640 x 27; pflag@gayalliance.org. Gay Alliance Library & Archives Sunday hours ended. Rochester General Assembly Sundays, Flying Squirrel Community Center, 285 Clarissa St. Unity Fellowship Church Sundays, 1:30 pm, Lutheran Church of Peace, 125 Caroline St., 14620. 520-6188. Dignity-Integrity 1st Sunday: 5pm Episcopal Eucharist with music; 2nd Sunday: 5pm Roman Catholic Liturgy of the Word with music; 3rd Sunday: 5pm Episcopal Eucharist (quiet); 4th Sunday: 5pm Prayers to start the week, followed by potluck supper. Open Arms Metropolitan Community Church 740 Marshall Rd., Chili, 10:30am, 271-8478 Gay Men’s Alcoholics Anonymous St. Luke’s/St. Simon Cyrene Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St. 8:30pm, 232-6720, Weekly. Closed meeting Rainbow SAGE First Sundays: Euchre Club, 3-6pm. Third Sundays, Potluck at First Universalist Church, 150 S. Clinton Ave., 4pm. Men’s Cooking Group Third or fourth Sundays, 355-7664. Civil Rights Front Every Tuesday, 5pm, Equal=Grounds, 750 South Ave. http://www.civilrightsfront.wordpress.com

Rochester AA/NA Meetings Every week there are four regularly scheduled GLBTI AA and two NA meetings in Rochester.

Tuesdays

Narcotics Anonymous 6-7:30pm. AIDS and Recovery 1124 Culver Road (Covenant United Methodist Church) This is an NA meeting that is open to all addicts who have a desire to stop using. Although it is not specifically a gay-oriented meeting, it is welcoming to people of all sexual orientations and gender identities, as well as to anyone who is affected by HIV and AIDS.

Wednesdays

New Freedom/New Happiness Group 7pm. First Unitarian Church, 220 S. Winton Rd. Bus riders: Take the last #18 University bus to 12 Corners. Use the stop just past the top of the hill at Hillside Ave. and before Highland Ave. Or take the #1 Park Ave. to the corner of East and Winton, then walk five minutes south (uphill) on Winton. This is an open discussion meeting. All issues – as they relate to our alcoholism/addiction and recovery – are fair game.

Fridays Gay Men’s 7:30pm. Immanuel Baptist Church, 815 Park Ave. • Closed meeting, restricted to alcoholics and addicts • Men’s meeting • Handicapped accessible This is a round-robin discussion meeting. If you are shy about meeting people or speaking up in a group, you will find this meeting particularly warm and inviting because everyone gets their turn to speak (or pass). As a result, this meeting often runs long, so plan on more than the usual hour.

Saturdays Saturday Night Special 7pm. First Unitarian Church, 220 S. Winton Rd. Bus riders: The #18 University Ave. bus does not go by the church on weekend evenings. Take the #1 Park Ave. bus to the corner of East and Winton, then walk five minutes south (uphill) on Winton. • Open meeting, all are welcome, “straight friendly” • Mixed men and women • Handicapped accessible, take elevator to basement Meeting begins with a speaker, followed by open discussion.

Sundays Step in the Right Direction 7:30-9pm. 1275 Spencerport Road (Trinity Alliance Church) This is an NA meeting that is open to all addicts who have a desire to stop using. Although it is not specifically a gay-oriented meeting, it is welcoming to people of all sexual orientations and gender identities. Each week features a reading from NA literature, followed by discussion. Rochester Gay Men 8pm. St. Luke/St. Simon’s Episcopal Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh Street. Bus riders use the Fitzhugh Street stop on Main Street at the County Office Building and walk south one block. • Closed meeting, restricted to alcoholics and addicts • Men’s meeting • NOT handicapped accessible Meeting begins with a speaker, followed by open discussion.

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 458 • JUly 2012

July 2012

Classifieds

SUNDAY 1

Classified ads are $5 for the first 30 words; each additional 10 words is another $1. We do not bill for classifieds, so please send or bring ad and payment to: The Empty Closet, 875 E. Main Street, Suite 500, Rochester, NY 14605. Paying by check: checks must be made out to Gay Alliance or GAGV. The deadline is the 15th of the month, for the following month’s issue. We cannot accept ads over the phone. Pay when you place your ad. We will accept only ads accompanied by name and phone number. Neither will be published, but we must be able to confirm placement. The Empty Closet is not responsible for financial loss or physical injury that may result from any contact with an advertiser. Advertisers must use their own box number, voice mail, e-mail or personal address/phone number.

THURSDAY 5

Gay Alliance Pride Event at JCC. 6 pm: Tour of exhibit “Nazi Persecution of Gays.” 7 pm: 1919 film “Different From Others;” 7:15: documentary “Beyond Gay: The Politics of Pride.” 8:30 pm: Father Jim Mulcahy speaks on LGBT struggle in Ukraine. See article p. 31; interview p. 7.

FRIDAY 6

Rainbow Flag Raising, City Hall, 4 pm. Rochester Women’s Community Chorus to sing. ASL interpreted. See Pride Guide. Super Sassy in the South Wedge. 5-9 pm. South Wedge merchants offer Pride Specials. See Pride Guide. Tom Somerville Pride exhibit opening at Equal=Grounds, 570 South Ave. 5-9 pm.

SATURDAY 7

Pride Day at Seabreeze. 11 am-10 pm. Butch Femme Connection dinner night. Hong Wah Chinese Restaurant, 1802 Penfield Rd./Route 441 in Penfield. 7 pm. 288-7208, email DressyFemme@ aol.com or Facebook page http://www. facebook.com/bfconnection.

SUNDAY 8

Dignity Integrity. Roman Catholic Liturgy of the Word, with music. 5 pm St. Luke’s/St. Simon’s Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St. http://www.di-rochester.org/; DI Hotline at 585-234-5092. Pride Tea Dance. 2-6 pm. Location TBA. $10. See website: GayAlliance.org.

MONDAY 9

Pride Youth Dance, Pageant. 5-9 pm, Tilt, 444 Central Ave. $5 admission, LGBTQ youth and allies, ages 13-23. Pizza, two free soda tickets. No drugs, alcohol. See Pride Guide. Lambda Project. Dramatic readings, 7:30 pm, Christ Church, 141 East Ave. $7 adults, $5 students/seniors. See Pride Guide.

TUESDAY 10

Pride Movie Night at Third Presbyterian Church, 4 Meigs at East Ave. “Ma Vie en Rose,” in French with English subtitles. 7 pm. Free. See Pride Guide.

WEDNESDAY 11

The Good, the Bad and the Funny. Trans open story event, panel and open mic. 7 pm, Equal=Grounds, 570 South Ave. See Pride Guide.

THURSDAY 12

CNY Fertility Open House. 6-8pm, 2244 East Ave. 244-1280. www.cnyfertility.com ImageOut Summer Mayhem screening of “Madame X”, Cinema Theatre, 957 S. Clinton Ave., 7:30 pm. $8 at door. Presale tickets $7 at Outlandish, Equal=Grounds. Wheelchair accessible. See Pride Guide. Out & Equal Second Thursdays Networking. Boulder Coffee, 100 Alexander St. on patio. Pride giveaways, 50/50 raffle to benefit Pride 2012. No cover. 5:30-7:30 pm.

FRIDAY 13

Bread & Water Theatre presents “Mirror of Love,” through July 15. Friday, Sat. at 8 pm; Sunday 2 pm. 243 Rosedale St. $6-$12. 271-5523. See article p. 28. Pride Power Mixer, 7-10 pm, Holiday Inn Airport, 91 Brooks Ave. Sashing of Grand Marshals. Free, cash bar, food, prizes. See Pride Guide.

SATURDAY 14

Family Day at Rochester Museum & Science Center. 1:30-3:30 pm. Art and family activities. See Pride Guide. Rochester Pride Parade 2012: Superheroes. Bands, floats, drag kings and queens, Youth king and queen, RFD fire engine, motorcycles, community and faith groups, more. Parade lines up 2:30 pm, Brunswick St. off Park Ave. Step off 3:30 pm, march to Auditorium Center parking lot, College St. between Goodman and Prince, for Pride Festival. Emcees The Big Wigs; headliner Jessica Sutta, vendors, special surprises! 4:30-9:30 pm. $5 in advance; $8 at gate. See Pride Guide.

SUNDAY 15

Pride Picnic. 1-7 pm, Genesee Valley Park. $10 advance; $15 at gate (students with ID $5). Entry fee includes raffle for lottery basket. Food and merchandise vendors, antique cars, dog show, picnic site decorating contest, dancing in Roundhouse. See Pride Guide. PFLAG conference. 8:30 am-4:30 pm. JCC, 1200 Edgewood Drive. $30 registration. Call Teri Boerner at 7977679. See article p. 1. Dignity Integrity. Quiet Episcopal Mass in the Chapel. 5 pm St. Luke’s/St. Simon’s Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St. http:// www.di-rochester.org/; DI Hotline at 585234-5092.

PERSONALS

GWM wishes to meet others in Waterloo/Geneva area. Into tanning, working out, exercise videos. V-shaped torso. Please address replies to Jim Knapp, 1749 Powderly Rd., Waterloo NY 13165.

FOR SALE

Malibu outdoor lights. String of four, never unboxed. $70 value for $50! 385-7931.

SERVICES

Rochester’s Best Man to Man Rubdown. Unwind with this degreed, employed, fit, friendly, healthy, Italian GWM. Middle aged, 5’8”, 165 lbs., 32” waist, nonsmoker, d & d free, HIV negative. My 10-plus years experience guarantees your relaxation and satisfaction.

Hotel visit, in call in my home or out call in your residence. Reasonable rates. Discretion appreciated and practiced. Don’t delay, call me today at 585-773-2410 (cell) or 585-235-6688 (home) or e-mail me at: magichands@rochester.rr.com. Martin Ippolito master electrician. Electrical work, telephone jacks, cable TV, burglar alarm systems, paddle fans. 585-266-6337. World renowned weddings. 42 years performing same sex commitments, now marriages (it’s about time!). Nancy BB Meyer minister, God is Love-Animals are Angels ministry. 585-733-6213. Piano lessons, all ages and levels. Are you getting married? I’d love to play for your event. Contact Frank Verna III, (585)5446799, frankmelisma@yahoo.com.

WEDNESDAY 18

Rochester Rams general meeting. 7:30 pm, Bachelor Forum, 670 University Ave.

SATURDAY 21

Pueto Rican Parade. Line-up 10am, Liberty Pole. March to Frontier Field. Butch Femme Connection dinner night, 6 pm. George’s Restaurant, Panorama Plaza (1601 Penfield Rd.) 2887208, email DressyFemme@aol.com or Facebook page http://www.facebook. com/bfconnection Rochester Rams Bar Night. Bike night 9pm-2am, Bachelor Forum, 670 University Ave.

SUNDAY 22

Dignity Integrity. Evening Prayer, followed by a Potluck Supper. Potluck theme “Summer salads.” 5 pm St. Luke’s/ St. Simon’s Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St. http://www.di-rochester.org/; DI Hotline at 585-234-5092.

SATURDAY 28

Rochester Trans Group. 3-5:30 pm, Gay Alliance Community Center, first floor, 875 E. Main St. www.rnytg.org. Ganondagan Native American Dance & Music Festival. Featuring Keith Secola. Crafts, food, traditional dancing, more. 10 am-7 pm; also Sunday. Ganondagan State Historic Site, 1488 State Rte. 444, Victor.

SUNDAY 29

Dignity Integrity. Program TBA. 5 pm St. Luke’s/St. Simon’s Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St. http://www.di-rochester.org/; DI Hotline at 585-234-5092.

y p p Ha e d i r P

justinhubbell.com

Dignity Integrity Episcopal Mass/ Healing Service, with music. 5 pm St. Luke’s/St. Simon’s Church, 17 S. Fitzhugh St. http://www.di-rochester.org/; DI Hotline at 585-234-5092.

Jewish Pride Service, 6 pm, led by Rabbi Amy Sapowith. Temple Sinai, 363 Penfield Rd. Please join us to celebrate diversity based on the Jewish tradition of justice. Refreshments to follow.

JUly 2012 • number 458 • gay alliance of the genesee valley • the empty closet

Bed & Breakfast

PFLAG meets the 3rd Sunday of each month. Meetings are at Open Arms Metropolitan Community Church, 740 Marshall Road, Rochester 14624 from 1 to 3pm. Join us! Questions? Call: 585-244-8640 and leave a message, or e-mail: pflag@gayalliance.org

Seeking

sex

in the park?

the empty closet • the gay alliance of the genesee valley • number 458 • JUly 2012