Empty Closet, April 2018

New Ground Poetry Night R E NT com es to Roch ester Meet the Roc Pride E-Team works from TO NY LE UZZI, C H R ISTO PH E R C O LE S, LU CY B E H R & R ON COOK

ISSUE #521 APRIL_ 2018

PoWer of WorDS

E M P T Y

C L O S E T | April 2018 | 3

FEATURES 7

ROWAN COLLINS Editor rowanc@outalliance.org T_ 585-244-9030 ROWAN COLLINS Advertising rowanc@outalliance.org T_585-244-9030

NEW GROUND:

Javi Mason delves into the monthly poetry gathering that opens souls. You have five minutes. What would you say?

ALAN ALTMAN Graphic Design www.A3-Design.com

Issue printed by:

14

ets share their work throughout our pages. Enjoy the words of Christopher Coles, Lucy Behr, Tony Leuzzi, and Ron Cook.

THE OUT ALLIANCE 100 College Avenue Rochester New York 14607 Monday & Friday 9am–5pm Tuesday–Thursday 9am­–8pm

620 South Ave. Rochester, NY 14620 (585)461-2556

T_

585. 244. 8640 585. 244. 8246 E_ info@outalliance.org www.outalliance.org F_

OUT IN PRINT

29

Berlin 1936

22

25

ROC PRIDE 2018:

We revealed the theme in March, now meet the E-Team

REGULARS

The Out Alliance works to be champions for LGBTQ+ life and culture. We strive to ensure that all members of the LGBTQ+ communities, at all stages of their lives, are free to be fully participating citizens, living lives in which they are safe, stable and fully respected.

POWER OF WORDS: Four po-

4 10 12 16 17 21 21 24 28 30 36 39

RENT IN ROC:

Our interview with Aaron Alcaraz (Angel) and the show’s lasting legacy

TO THE COM M UNITY ALLIANCE NEWS COM M UNITY PROFILE SAGE NEWS HISTORY CORNER GNAW ROCS OUT AND ABOUT ROC YOUTH CALENDAR OUTLOOK THE SCENE KYLES B&B

4 | April 2018 | E M P T Y

A LETTER TO OUR COMMUNITY

A

s I began this letter I was sure we had spring around the corner and just like that...two feet of snow fell from the sky! That’s Rochester for you.

Even without a thermal spring, the spirit of growth is still present at the Out Alliance. I want to share with you some of the wonderful programs, events, and initiatives we have at the Alliance.

C L O S E T

We are in full swing at the Out Alliance. I am so proud of the work our amazing and dedicated staff, volunteers, and community do for the Out Alliance each and every day. We are also proud to work with our community partners and participate in exciting collaboration with groups like Center for Youth, Action for a Better Community, Heart2Heart, MOCHA, Trillium, HCR, Jordan Health, Breast Cancer Coalition, Image OUT, HRC, Lifespan and Gilda’s Club, and look forward to many more throughout the year.

We welcome everyone through our doors. I invite you to come visit us, check out our wonderful programs, spend some time with community, and get involved with the Out Alliance. We can’t wait to see you.

Sincerely, JEFF MYERS Interim Executive Director

P R O G R A M U P DATE S :

CONTRIBUTORS

GET YOUR MESSAGE

SAGE:

INQUEERY:

Our amazing youth program has expanded its programming to include Q-Manity, our new queer youth peer support group. Our popular theatre club is back again this spring: in partnership with RBTL our youth will focus on RENT, which comes to town in May. Tangent, Youth Hangout Days, U-DJ dances, and fun events like our “Coffee House Open Mic” night keep our youth engaged in their community and provide skills to enhance leadership development.

SAGE continues to provide incredible services and support to our senior LGBTQ+. Our weekly Lunch & Learn program is more popular than ever and twice-weekly yoga with Tom Somerville is a smashing success — no matter the weather! SAGE’s unique Seniors in Service and Pride in Aging events promote connection, education, and resource identification so our SAGE members can maintain agency over their lives.

To say InQueery’s inventive programs have taken off with community members is an understatement. Last month’s Drag Queen Bingo at Three Heads Brewing was standing room only just 15 minutes after doors opened!

InQueery’s movie series, discussions, classes, and bingo nights have connected hundreds of new faces with the Out Alliance and strengthened connections with local organizations.

GALLERY Q + OUT ALLIANCE LIBRARY: Exciting new collections and materials are brought to our LGBTQ+ Resource Center each month by Gallery Q and Out Alliance Library.

Our incredible volunteer teams make these critical work seamlessly; highlighting artists, authors, and themes relevant to our community and time.

First Fridays bring in hundreds of art fans for new exhibitions, and our Library provides access to one of the largest LGBTQ+ collections on the East Coast.

include RADIANT LOSSES, THE BURNING DOOR, and MEDITATION ARCHIPELAGO. He has also edited PASSWORDS PRIMEVAL, which collects Leuzzi’s interviews with 20 American poets.

OUT!

CHRISTOPHER COLES is an American thinker, Sign Language interpreter, civil rights activist and spoken word poet.

As “Rochester’s Son“, he believes in the empowerment of the community thru its collective social, political and artistic cultural engagement.

ADVE RTI S E with E C

585.

244. 9030 OUT ALLIANCE AN NOU NCE M E NTS:

YOUTH PROGRAM:

TONY LEUZZI books of poems

LGBTQ ACADEMY:

EMPTY CLOSET: By now, I hope you have seen the newly

Our nationallyrecognized LGBTQ Academy continues their incredible work throughout the Greater Rochester area, across New York state, and around the country.

The Academy team provides crucial discussion and guidance to create LGBTQ+ inclusive spaces everywhere from K-12 schools to corporate workplaces and everywhere in between.

updated Empty Closet magazine! In partnership with A3 Design and PrintRoc, we have been able to build from the amazing legacy of Susan Jordan and previous Empty Closet editors. With a focus on community voices and collaboration, the magazine features organizations, initiatives, and perspectives throughout our diverse, dynamic community.

RON COOK has a BA in Liberal Arts/ English from SUNY Geneseo and has worked as a teacher and in business & manufacturing. He enjoys photography, the energy of large cities, and art glass. His future plans include doing everything he was too scared to try when he was young.

JAVI MASON is a self-published author,

blogger, podcaster, and poet. They are the creator of “Black Girl with Glasses”, author of “The One Taken from the Sea of Stars”, “The Wrong One”, & “Don’t Look at Me Like That”, and host of “The Bonfire Talks on WAYO 104.3FM

Daily updates and breaking news are shared through the EC online and social media channels to keep readers informed on local, national, and global stories.

EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR SEARCH: Our search for our next Executive Director is in full swing. The blind review committee, chaired by Dr. Jessica Guzmán-Rea, will begin

BRANDON BROOKS is a graduate of Adelphi University’s Honors College and works with DePaul Community Services.

Brooks moonlights as a curatorial assistant for Genesee County Village & Museum’s Susan Greene clothing collection and operates his own historical clothing atelier L’Aspect Ancien.

to make their review of applicants next week and present their final selections to Board and staff shortly thereafter.

I am confident that this process, including community feedback opportunities with finalists, will enable us to find the right candidate to advance our mission to create a safe, stable, and fully respected LGBTQ+ community.

TO READ THE DIGITAL VERSION AND SO MUCH MORE, VISIT WWW.OUTALLIANCE.ORG/EMPTYCLOSET

BOARD OF TRUSTEES

6 | April 2018 | E M P T Y

C L O S E T

E M P T Y

An Old Amp and a Microphone:

COLLEEN RAIMOND President CHLOE CORCORAN Vice President JEFF LAMBERT Secretary MARTIN MURPHY Treasurer

C L O S E T | April 2018 | 7

The History of the New Ground Poetry Night

By: Javi Mason

JASON BARNECUT-KEARNS SADY FISCHER MILO PRIMEAUX LUIS ROSARIO-MCCABE DAVID ZONA

JEFFREY MYERS Interim Executive Director JOSHUA STAPF Development Director JEANNIE GAINSBURG Education Director ROWAN COLLINS Communications Director KAYDEN MILLER Education Coordinator OLIVIA PAGE LGBTQ Academy Educator JEANA BONACCI-ROTH Administrative Assistant ERIDAN MAEDER SAGE Program Coordinator ANNE TISCHER Outreach Coordinator EVELYN BAILEY Historian KAT WIGGALL Database Administrator

T

he City of Rochester is considered a mecca for independent storytellers. Organizations such as Writers and Books and Rochester Black Authors Expo have carved a reputation for themselves by showcasing the literary works of local authors. Another avenue where writers demonstrate their creativity is performing at community open mics events throughout the city.

8 | April 2018 | E M P T Y

O

ne of them is the New Ground Poetry Night.Founded by Rochester poets Jonathan Everitt and Albert Abonado, this particular open mic has been acting as an artistic outlet for community poets since 2013.

“Al and I are friends and we were both involved in the local writing scene,” said Everitt straightforwardly. “We felt there was room for a new open mic. Equal Grounds hosted many poetry events, so we reached out to Randy [Torgerson] and got the ok.” Chuckling, he added “We bought an old amp and a microphone and the rest is history.”

“Rochester has a rich tradition of open mics, but most open mics around town were freeform, allowing everything from musical performances to comedy to poetry,” explained Abonado. “Jonathan and I had been discussing a structured kind of open mic that focused exclusively on poetry. After thinking about the over the structure, we explored some possible venues, and ended up at Equal Grounds.”

Abonado is correct in pointing out that the majority of the open mics in Rochester mixture of creative expression. What separates New Ground Poetry Night from the others, however, is that it is exclusive to poetry. And unlike at the typical open mic, there is a simple, but strict protocol for performers to follow: print your name on the sign-up sheet to either perform three poems or perform one for five minutes.

Setting boundaries for readers is one of the key components to the event’s overall success—especially since the attendance continuously grows monthly. When New Ground Poetry Night initially started, it was attended by only a dozen people. As time passed, attendance has swelled to 20-30 people a month (courtesy of the Facebook page and word of mouth). And not everyone in the audience comes to with a finished piece in hand. According to the founders, there are individuals who come to listen to the performers share their work.

“People bring friends for support or stop in just to listen,” Abonado said proudly. “I think that’s the part that excites me the most. The growth of the open mic is wonderful, but to see people who are there for no other reason than to listen to poetry is just a beautiful thing to witness.”

C L O S E T

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C L O S E T | April 2018 | 9

What makes New Ground Poetry Night even more extraordinary is that it has become a safe haven for poets of color and/or those who identify as a member of the LGBTIQA community. Every month, these individuals recite original pieces about their vulnerabilities regarding topics such as trauma and relationship struggles.

Though the monthly event is heavily attended by members of said demographics, both Abonado and Everitt ensures that it is all-inclusive.

“We didn’t start it with only the [LGBTIQA] community in mind,” Everitt states. “We wanted to be diverse and knew that there would be a lot of LGBT writers and writers of color that no one’s heard before.”

Regardless of whether a poet is able to memorize every line or read the piece on their cell phone, New Grounds Poetry Night is more than a event for local poets. It also provides a safe space for community members of marginalized demographics courageous enough to display their vulnerabilities with impunity and without judgement.

10 | April 2018 | E M P T Y

C L O S E T

ALLIANCE NEWS

Alliance welcomes new SAGE Coordinator, Eridan Maeder

FUN FACT

C L O S E T | April 2018 | 11

VOLUNTEER(S) OF THE MONTH The InQueery Team

ERIDAN MAEDER came on board with the Out Alliance last summer as an intern, working to create new programming for transgender and gender expansive youth. Through their time with the Alliance, they began to work more closely with other programs – including the wonderful members of SAGE.

We are proud to announce that as of March, Eridan officially came on board at the Alliance as the new SAGE Coordinator. They will be responsible for our senior programming; including the ever-popular Senior Yoga with Thom Somerville, weekly Lunch & Learns, Seniors in Service, and Pride in Aging.

Eridan brings an amazing warmth and compassion to every aspect of their work. As a facilitator for Tangent and T Minus 35 – our social groups for trans and gender expansive youth and 21–35 year olds – they have bridged generational gaps, helped to create broader outreach throughout the greater Rochester area, and connected community members of all ages to resources and support.

SUPERPOWER

E M P T Y

“I think I would bring the superpower of listening. I am very excited to start learning about the people of SAGE because they have such a unique knowledge and experience to share!”

Braden Reese, Dean Wilson, and Chris Schultheis – bring unique, vibrant events to the Out Alliance and our community every month. Whether it is an important dialogue about the intersection of queer identity and disability, a free movie night complete with drinks and snacks, or the ever-popular Drag Queen Bingo, Braden, Dean, and Chris work hard to conceptualize, plan, and execute each event with aplomb.

By working to partner with local organizations and community groups, the InQueery team has bridged new connections and expanded the Out Alliance’s reach beyond our wildest dreams.

Events at our LGBTQ+ Resource Center bring in new participants who may have never stepped foot in our Center before, blending together with regulars who don’t miss a single program.

Events “off site” at places like Three Heads Brewing, Lanai, Record Archive, Buta Pub, and Lazertron get our community to support local business and be visible together.

We want to thank Braden, Dean, and Chris for their incredible work for their hard work, passion, and dedication to the Out Alliance, the greater Rochester LGBTQ+ community, and LGBTQ+ life and culture.

Check out InQueery on Facebook @InQueeryRoc.

DEAN WILSON

BRADEN REESE

CHRIS SHULTHEIS

Eridan is a graduate of Hilton High School, bringing our Hilton grad staff total to 2!

PROGRAM SPOTLIGHT:

GALLERY Q:

Out in the Sticks

18 emerging with ImageOut OPENING FIRST FRIDAY APRIL 6

18 emerging, an annual juried exhibition highlighting regional student artists.

The opening will be held from 6:00 to 9:00 pm at Gallery Q, located at 100 College Avenue.

Established in 2017, ImageOut hosts this We know that art supplies can be expensive, so we annual student art exhibition at Gallery Q. Rochester and the surrounding area is home to several amazing are excited to foster the creative talents of our local art university art programs. This year’s exhibition will include a range of works in a variety of medium,students both by sharing their work with the Rochester including printmaking, drawing, photography, sculpture community and by awarding three cash prizes,” and animation. said Jamie Allen, ImageOut board member.

New this year, the ImageOut art committee

Winners will be announced at the opening. will also present three cash prizes.

MAY PREVIEW

ERIC BELLMANN

40 years, 40+ works, Drawings, Watercolors, etc.

First Friday opening: Monday, May 4 from 6-9pm at Gallery Q

It all started with lunch. Anne Tischer noticed a few participants in a SAGE Lunch & Learn had come all the way up from Naples – a solid hours drive each way. Recognizing a “It’s a process,” Tischer said. “We want to need for programming and connection in more provide consistent presence for folks who rural areas outside of the greater Rochester area, Tischer and Jeff Myers, then Out Alliance feel isolated, lonely, and without resources Program Director, conceived of Out in the Sticks.

or community. By having these events each month,

Currently, there are two meetups each we can reach more folks and empower them month in Batavia and one in Dansville. Batavia hosts a discussion group at GO ART! each first to feel comfortable as their authentic selves.

Wednesday and a happy hour at Bourbon and Burger Co. the third Wednesday of the month.The toughest piece is finding places to host us.”

The Dansville meetup lies in between on the second Wednesday of each month at Jack’s Place restaurant.

There’s more to come: Tischer said there have been requests for similar programs in other rural towns and localities and she is hard at work to create a second monthly meetup in Dansville.

Potlucks, short film screenings, craft nights, and more to follow.

12 | April 2018 | E M P T Y

C L O S E T

E M P T Y

COMMUNITY PROFILE:

J A V I E R

IT

TEG

R IT Y/ R

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H

Commissioned by the Memorial Art Gallery with support from the Zell Family, Deborah Ronnen and Sherman Levey, the Gary and Marcia Stern Family Advised Fund at the Rochester Area Community Foundation, and an anonymous donor. In-kind support is provided by Eastman Kodak Company.

IMAGE: Javier Téllez, NOSFERATU (The Undead) (still, detail), 2018. Courtesy of the artist.

500 UNIVERSITY AVE. | MAG.ROCHESTER.EDU

YOUR AD HERE

Episcopal Eucharist w/ music with Reverend Michael Laver presiding

E

APRIL 8th

T

D-I/R APRIL 2018 SCHEDULE R

D

E

IG

For more information, to get involved, or seek assistance, call 585-234-5092 or email info@di-rochester.org

ON VIEW APRIL 22 THROUGH JUNE 17

APRIL 1st / Easter Sunday S

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IN Y-

14614 – has sought something different: “Some came seeking to be healed and others for reconciliation with their Church.

Some came seeking answers and others to have their beliefs validated. Still others came hoping to be prophetic witness to their Church as LGBT Christians or to be instruments of change within their faith traditions. Some were simply looking for a safe and comfortable place to worship. Whatever the reason, DignityIntegrity has been there and is still here.”

Dignity-Integrity has worked closely with local and state-wide organizations to further advance recognition of LGBTQ+ people in communities of faith, and to provide resources and support to the local community. They are a member of Interfaith Advocates for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender People, which serves to provide witness to the “wholeness and holiness” of queer people of faith, and affiliates of Fortunate Families: which focuses on families of LGBTQ+ people in the Roman Catholic Church. Dignity-Integrity also works with Rochester Area Interfaith Hospitality Network to provide housing and assistance to homeless and housingunstable families.

“Whether you or someone you love are looking for a safe place to worship or fellowship, seeking healing from the violence our religious traditions have directed toward LGBTI people, or need support on the journey,” Dignity-Integrity welcomes everyone to visit and take part in a service, or stop by for a potluck dinner to get to know other members.

“Our fellowship is a vital witness to all that our lives and loves are whole and holy.”

T É L L E Z

NOSFERATU

DIGNITY-INTEGRITY ROCHESTER

Dignity-Integrity/Rochester (D-I/R) was chartered in 1975 as the first combined chapter of the national organizations of Dignity/USA and Integrity, Inc. Dignity/USA is a national organization focusing on LGBTQ+ rights in the Catholic Church. Integrity Inc. functions similarly with respect to the Episcopal Church. This marriage of the two groups allowed for a trailblazing, first-of-its-kind organization committed to social and spiritual support for LGBTQ+ and LGBTQ-accepting person of faith, as well as creating a community “with regional and national connections in the struggle for justice in church and society.”

Many people have called Dignity-Integrity home over the past 43 years – having felt unwelcome, unsafe, or unaffirmed in their home churches. Their chartered history gives a unique look into the mission Dignity-Integrity champions: “All of us belong as a prophetic challenge to those in authority and as a ministry to those who have felt wounded or abandoned by organized religion. Our fellowship is a vital witness to all that our lives and loves are whole and holy.”

Through weekly worship services, and social activities held throughout the year, Dignity-Integrity cultivates a loving community that provides support, love, and care to one another.

Each Sunday brings a special service, aimed to honor both the Roman Catholic and Episcopal branches of the organization.

First and Third Sundays offer a unique Episcopal Eucharist service in the evenings (you can sleep in!) Second Sundays brings a special Roman Catholic service; Liturgy of the Word.

Fourth Sundays focuses on short prayer followed by a potluck dinner for community. See our side-bar for Dignity-Integrity’s April schedule of services.

A spokesperson for Dignity-Integrity noted that each person who has passed through the doors of the Church of St. Luke and St. Simon Cyrene – where Dignity-Integrity meets and worships, 17 S Fitzhugh St, Rochester, New York

C L O S E T | April 2018 | 13

17 S Fitzhugh Street Rochester, New York 14614

ALL events start at

5PM

Catholic Liturgy w/ Gloria Ulterino presiding

APRIL 15th

Quiet Episcopal Eucharist w/ Reverend Jimmie Sue Deppe presiding

APRIL 22nd

Prayers to Start the Week followed by a potluck supper

We always make time for adventures!

585.

244.

9030

We offer a full spectrum of senior services from independent living to skilled nursing.

Most importantly, we have designed communities to help you embrace living your way.

Call 585-760-1300 to schedule a tour or go to stjohnsliving.org/tec.

Our life. Our way.

APRIL 29th

Catholic Liturgy service w/ music & Reverend Patti LaRosa presiding SJ TEC Apr 2018.indd 1

3/14/18 1:54 PM

“ A D

N A U S E U M ”

SERIES

from

by

TONY

LE UZZ I

10/24/17

Zelimkhan Bakaev. Yes, he was pretty, a playful, boyish, dark-haired thrush with sorrow shining from his eyes.

I study the strangeness of his name, brush his digitized cheek with my thumb, swipe left, enlarge, swipe left twice more and linger on his almost grin.

Now I click a video, download a song I can’t understand, read his story yet again: the return home

for a sister’s wedding, his torture, thirst, oblivion. What if grief is just desire distorted into guilt? all day I long to lie with the dead.

11/08/17

Inscription: “For James on his birthday— Richard, 1960.” Jacket flap: “the theme of love with its attendant rapture and despair.” Some poems:

“Water Music”; “Je Est Un Autre”; “The Encounter”; “Bitter Lemons”; “Byron.”

I wonder if James ever read them.

I wonder if, when presented, it

was tossed beside the uncorked wine, if James unknotted Richard’s tie, gently bit his bottom lip, then led him to the other room, the only room that

either, in a wave of rapture or despair, would dare to call the other.

16 | April 2018 | E M P T Y

SAGE PROFILE

C L O S E T

WEEKLY EVENT REMINDERS TUESDAYS

Joe

If you’ve been to the LGBTQ Resource Center on a Tuesday morning, you know Joe. Now 88, Joe (who asked we didn’t print his last name or “get me into trouble!”) has had a life that could fill an entire book set. His incredible stories, humor, and intelligence are near impossible to condense into one page.

Born in Rochester in 1931, Joe’s father passed away when he was 6, leaving his mother to care for a handful of children on her own. His parents had immigrated from Italy following Mussolini’s rise to power and relocated to Rochester to make a life for themselves.

After graduating from Aquinas Institute, he was drafted into the United States Armed Forces in 1951 as the Korean conflict escalated.

It was there that Joe learned to be a field medic – skills that would inform his civilian career and change the course of his life. He was sent as a specialist medic to Germany as troops were deployed to hold Stalin’s Russian troops at the Iron Curtain.

Upon his return to Rochester, Joe trained to be Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetist at Rochester State Hospital. Through nearly 39 years in the profession, Joe became an indispensable mentor and advisor to everyone he worked with – so much so that he is still called on to provide advice 25 years after his retirement. Rochester State is also where he met his wife.

Joe had always known he liked men but, as he says, “if anyone asked I pretended I didn’t. You couldn’t be out! You got married.” Their 1958 marriage did not last long, as Joe could not be his authentic self and felt embarrassed for having caused his wife suffering.

A short time after their divorce, Joe met the man he describes, wistfully, as the “love of his life”: Joe DeVito, part owner of Muther’s.

Joe and Joe spent 38 “beautiful” years together before DeVito passed away in 1999.

Joe says he is still incredibly close to DeVito’s family and will leave them a sizeable piece of his estate when he passes.

Joe’s accounts of medical treatment of gay men during his early years of practice at the State Hospital and the AIDS crisis at Rochester General decades later are harrowing: lobotomies, electroshock therapy, denial of care, and the horror of watching community members “drop dead each week. There was one dentist who would treat people and one funeral parlor that would bury them. That was it.”

Today, Joe is incredibly active in SAGE with his husband Ron. He loves to travel and has checked off the Rhine, London, Paris, Barcelona, Naples, Casablanca, Sao Paolo, and dozens more from his list. Joe’s is an avid reader and history buff who enjoys crusing around town in his prized Mazda convertible. He and Ron are active in their church community, where Joe is beloved, much as he is at SAGE. Find Joe some time and ask him to tell you a story – you’ll get a hundred and you’ll be enraptured.

C L O S E T | April 2018 | 17

HISTORY CORNER: Shoulders To Stand On

SENIOR YOGA WITH TOM 10:30–11:30am, $5

LUNCH & LEARN 11:30am–1:30pm, $3, catered lunch & speaker

THURSDAYS

SENIOR YOGA WITH TOM 10:30–11:30am, $5

1ST & 3RD THURSDAYS

SENIORS IN SERVICE 11:30am–1:30pm, light lunch and volunteer activities

2 ND & 4 TH WEDNESDAYS

50+ MEN’S GROUP 6:30–8pm, Topical discussions

2 ND THURSDAYS

BREAKFAST CLUB @Jefferson Rd. Denny’s, 9:00–10:30am, RSVP Gerry 585. 730. 8772

3 RD FRIDAYS

PRIDE IN AGING 2:30–4pm, speakers and resources to help you “age in place”

LAST FRIDAYS

FABULOUS FISH FRY! 5:30pm, location varies, RSVP: Audet 585. 287. 2958 or aprice002@aol.com (events at Out Alliance LGBTQ Resource Center unless otherwise noted)

Joe’s full profile can be found at the EC online: outalliance.org/emptycloset

E M P T Y

See February’s Calendar on page 28 for this month’s special events!

Poetry from the Fall 1971 and the Summer 1972 issues of the Empty Closet

In the early ‘70’s women were the most notable “poets” who shared their insight, thoughts and feelings with an LGBTQ community hungry for connection.

The Women’s Movement was in full swing.

We find that women were willing to be identified as feminists but in the early and late 70’s being identified as LGBTQ was not safe. This is still true today for many – too many. That is why as you look for authorship you will find only first names or pseudonyms.

Shoulders to Stand On presents for your enjoyment two “poems”. Liz Bell, an out feminist activist from her early days with the Gay Liberation Front (GLF) to today, puts into a poetic form her experience of hope in meeting a soul mate. Liz was a part of the GLF’s Speakers Bureau in 1972. In the Shoulders to Stand On Documentary she recounts the story of speaking to Tim Mains’ classes in Greece, NY. Liz is a minister and an ImageOut volunteer. Her feminist, activist roots are stronger than ever, and her passion for equality and justice continues to infect those she meets. The other poem is by Carol. Her poem is simple direct and expresses a common experience for many.

Fall 1971

Summer 1972

18 | April 2018 | E M P T Y

C L O S E T

FULL CIRCLE INTERGENERATIONAL BRUNCH

SATURDAY, APRIL 21 Come join us for the first FULL CIRCLE INTERGENERATIONAL BRUNCH FROM 12–2pm Eat delicious food, listen to speakers from different generations and meet your community.

All are welcome, RSVP by 4/18 to Eri at erim@outalliance.org or 585. 244. 8640 x23

Saturday, April 28: 10 am to 2 pm

NEW LOCATION: Sibley Square, 260 East Main Street Guided Neighborhood Bus Tours! April 28 Register at www.celebratecityliving.com

Call 428-CITY • www.celebratecityliving.com ars of Dou Ye

ass gl

200

to you by The Rochester @ccl_roc #celebratecityliving Brought Coalition for Neighborhood Living

TY

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N

CI

. Y.

1818 2018

Lovely A. Warren, Mayor Rochester City Council

by: @BAKARIPOET MAY ‘05

C L O S E T

E M P T Y

GNAW ROCS:

By

MONDAY

ERIE GRILL / 41 North Main Street, Pittsford Monday, Monday, a difficult beginning as we feel Sunday’s slower pace fade away. On the flip side: for those in the industry usually a day of rest, and their one day to hit what is actually open.

TUESDAYS

OX AND STONE / 282 Alexander Street, Rochester

HUMPDAY

REILLY HIRST

CHESHIRE SPEAKEASY ABOVE SOLERA WINE BAR / 647 South Ave., Rochester

THOR’S DAY

This column/post is dedicated to all those who like to go out, taste their local environs and do not rake in the moolah. A different option each weekday.

C L O S E T | April 2018 | 21

OUT AND ABOUT:

A CHAMPAGNE LIFE ON A BEER BUDGET

LENTO RESTAURANT VILLAGE GATE SQUARE / 274 N. Goodman, Rochester

FRIDAY

20 | April 2018 | E M P T Y

Erie Grill is a hidden gem in Pittsford on the canal. A farm to table restaurant that I trust for oysters in Rochester. They usually have 3 kinds of oysters at $1, as well as Cava, Prosecco, and Moscato for $5 on Mondays.

On Tuesdays there are a host of options in Rochester. Some of the most famous, I won’t mention. One of them has terrible food; the other treated the prior owners terribly; neither will be on this list.

Ox and Stone has a great kitchen staff, but the reason for going on Tuesday, specifically, is very clear: fish tacos. These fish tacos are the best in town, although fried, and are $3 instead of their usual cost. In addition, besides margaritas at $5 and Pacifico at $3, they have Sangrias made in house that are delicious and fill a brandy snifter for $5 all night. Pull the pro move and ask during happy hour for the night’s appetizer specials. Past ones have included a grilled cheese with pasilla honey, stuffed peppers, and gourmet meatballs for $3, $4, and $5.

Clearly, Rochester feels that Wednesdays require extra drinking, given the many no corkage nights throughout the city. My pick is also dedicated to forward drinking. Why not speak easy, as in Cheshire’s Speakeasy, which on Wednesday has a rum cocktail night in honor of old Havana and plays island themed music?

Thursday has less options, but one of my favorites of the week: Lento has 5 craft cocktails for $5. The staff takes care to create these interesting variations on classics-an unusual whiskey sour (it could be smoked cedar, or birch shrub); a daiquiri (perhaps peach?); an interesting Collins (cucumber/jalapeno maybe); as well as 2 others.

TAPAS 177 / 177 Saint Paul Street, Rochester My big secret, drum roll please…. Every Friday, Tapas 177 provides free appetizers. Some weeks it is chips and salsa and bruschetta; some weeks, the chef experiments with wings with maple sesame glaze, or a full taco bar. Drink specials include $3 well, a few $5 wines and a $6 chocolate martini. You just never know. In addition, it has live flamenco guitar.

Burlington Proves That

“ILOVERMONT”

By MERLE

EXIT

Burlington, Vermont is located just along a very scenic Lake Champlain. Acquaint yourself with a walking tour of this college town.

There are lots of shops and restaurants in this “outdoor mall.”

Take a short cruise aboard the Spirit of Ethan Allen II. The 500-passenger ship has two enclosed and one open top deck, offering an historic and very educational tour of the lake, as well as interesting facts about the area. The lake does get quite cold in the winter, so call for their schedule: 802. 862. 8300.

Plan to spend a full day in Shelburne, just south along Route 7, beginning at the Vermont Teddy Bear factory, 6655 Shelburne Rd. (802. 985. 3001). They carry the tradition of creating jointed bears of just about any ilk. Factory tours are available for a nominal fee and well worth it just for the souvenir.

In addition, you can “Make A Friend For Life”, by creating your own ‘non-jointed’ bear, have it stuffed, place a felt heart inside, have it sutured, cut the umbilical cord, record the birth time, name it and say The Teddy Bear Oath, all for about $20. Check out their catalogue at www.vermontteddybear.com.

At first glance, the Shelburne Museum appears as a wellpreserved historic village. A massive paddlewheel steamboat and a roofed lighthouse relocated from Lake Champlain stand out, almost as much as the horseshoe-shaped circus building.

The “museum” is composed of several buildings, each its own museum, and although there are knowledgeable volunteers at each historic venue, they are not in period costumes. Expect to spend at least four hours at this collection of collections in over 40 buildings.

Call at 802. 985. 3346 or www.shelburnemuseum.org.

There’s no secret about the Belgian chocolate used in making Lake Champlain Chocolates. Visit the factory at 750 Pine St. and get a glimpse of the chocolate preparation or just purchase them at the 61 Church St. downtown location. “Seconds” are sold at up to 50% off at both locations.

Just up the road, on Route 100, is the Hollow Cider Mill, where you can sample the cider made through an old-fashioned press. Don’t miss out in trying their award winning cider donuts. 1.800.3.APPLES.

Kim Borsavage is the owner of the Lang House, a most gracious place to stay. This Victorian grand mansion is situated in Burlington’s Hill Section, near the University and a short distance to the waterfront. Each of the eleven spacious rooms is a work of art. If more privacy is your thing, there are two rooms in the carriage house. Check out the Reed Room if you need a shower chair. Two rooms in the main building are open for breakfast and not just a quick Continental one. For rates and reservations, call 877. 919. 9799 or www.langhouse.com.

According to Vermont Gay Tourism, the “in” place to eat is Leunigs Bistro and Cafe, located at 105 Church Street, along the pedestrian mall. Billing themselves as “The Panache of Paris in the Center of Downtown Burlington”, it has a retro old-world flair: washed walls, marble bar, crystal chandeliers, and old oversized posters. 802. 863. 3759.

E M P T Y

CHRISTOPHER COLES

LUIS ROSARIO-MCCABE

BARB TURNER

JAZZELLE BONILLA

MARA KOUIDES

JEFF MYERS

SAM BRETT

MEG LINDSAY

Christopher Coles goes about the world as an American thinker, Sign Language Interpreter, Civil rights activist and Spoken word poet.

“I had soo much to say about ROC Pride last year – and that’s why I joined this year’s E-Team. I don’t complain, I volunteer. I am excited for Pride 2018, its theme, and all of its upcoming surprises! Get ready for Pride 2018!!!”

MEET YOUR ROC PRIDE 2018 E-TEAM E

ach year, a team of dedicated, passionate community members help to make the magic of ROC Pride a reality. They’re known as the E-Team: the executive committee. In 2018, with a festival and week of events that promises to be bigger than ever, eight individuals representing a cross-section of our diverse, beautiful community make up the E-Team. Find out more about each person and what they are most excited for in ROC Pride 2018.

C L O S E T | April 2018 | 23

Mara Kouides is excited to be a part of the e-team and to [Celebrate Pride] in Color. Since returning to her hometown of Rochester two years ago, Mara has been volunteering with the Out Alliance. She currently works as an Education Coordinator with Lifespan’s Finger Lakes Caregiver Institute, facilitating caregiver support programs at the Out Alliance. Mara is looking forward to the new event, Stand OUT on the Town, and is looking forward to see how the community comes up with creative interpretations of the Stand OUT: [Live] in Color theme throughout the week.

Luis works as a practitioner in the Women’s Health Clinic at the University of Rochester Medical Center and holds a Doctorate in Nursing from UR School of Nursing. Luis is a member of the Out Alliance Board of Directors and, in his spare time, owns a farm in Churchville with his husband.

He is excited to bring his perspectives to ROC Pride 2018 and see the ways our community comes together to celebrate and recognize progress and stand together.

Jeff is the interim Executive Director for the Out Alliance and serves on the E-Team as a bridge between the Alliance and ROC Pride.

Jeff has been the Alliance’s Managing Director since 2016 and served as the volunteer Volunteer Coordinator before joining the staff. An Alabama native, Jeff has held careers in interior design and event planning as well as serving on multiple Boards. Jeff is most excited about the opportunities ROC Pride 2018 offers and the chance to collaborate with community members to make this year the best yet!

Barb is a Prevention Educator for Hep C and HIV at Anthony Jordan Health Centers. She is a founding staff member of MOCHA and has been involved in the community for years. Barb is thrilled to bring her experience and history with ROC Pride to the 2018 festivities. She looks forward to the week of events and new, more inclusive approach to programs.

A.K.A. Samantha Vega, is a professional volunteer, and as such has been volunteering with ROC Pride planning since 2012; first with the entertainment committee, and then as co-chair for Pride 2016 & 2017. Organizing ROC Pride to Sam means giving back to the community who nurtured him “as a young gay man back in my college days to the active community member I am today.” Sam is excited to continue growing pride and giving our community an accessible, affordable and inclusive ROC Pride experience

Jazzelle works with the Rochester Victory Alliance on the Community Education & Outreach team. She is a member of BlackCrowned Entertainment, co-hosts the weekly live show “Spillin the Tea with Chasmar and Jazzelle”, and is a founder and owner of Sister’s Soul Food catering. Jazzelle is excited to be part of planning ROC Pride 2018 and continue to advocate for her community’s needs and recognition,

Originally from Wellsville, NY, Meg has a true passion for non profits and giving back to the community. She is the Events Manager at The Cause Collaborative here in Rochester, and is excited to serve on the Pride E Team for her first year. In her free time, Meg likes to adventure with her chocolate lab, Delilah, and visit local wineries and breweries, as well as restaurants, considering herself quite the “foodie”. She is looking forward to an even bigger ROC Pride festival at Cobbs Hill Park this year!

24 | April 2018 | E M P T Y

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E M P T Y E M P T Y

C L O S E T | April 2018 | 25 C L O S E T | April 2018 | 25

B-Out Theatre Club rocks again with Rent!

If you’re between 13 and 20 and missed this fall’s B-Out Theatre Club, which focused on ‘Fun Home’, you’re in luck!

Starting Wednesday, April 11th B-Out is back and it’s all about ‘Rent’!

Join B-Out as they spend 6 weeks delving into the depths of this beloved musical and see the show live when it comes to Rochester’s Auditorium Theatre on May 2nd. Learn about the show’s book and music while exploring its rich themes of diversity, love, kindness, and living for today.

Members will work together weekly on Wednesdays from 6-7:30pm 4/11 to 5/16 to complete a special project that encapsulates the experience.

Don’t miss out!

No day but today

IN

ROCHESTER AUDITORIUM THEATER

MAY 1ST – 6TH

TICKETS at RBTL.ORG or 585. 222. 5000

E M P T Y E M P T Y

1,570,000 M

RENT’s legacy

a cold January evening in When it premiered 22 years ago, on

with which Rent would force r shee 1996, there was little way to know the become a cultural phenomenon Rent told real stories, stories

that were happening as the show was being written and performed. Stories that are still being lived to this day.

For some, Rent gave a glimpse of themselves in a time

For many young people who are growing up without when representative media was nowhere near as prevalent as mirrors of themselves or their possible identities, Rent is still it is today (and there is still a long, long way to go.) Rent showed a cultural touchstone. Indeed, for a generation that wasn’t even home. relationships, identities, and experiences that hit the born when AIDS was an almost certain death sentence — but — which transplants nt Re w, ne s wa it When of for whom the eternal struggle for love, acceptance, creative me

gri the Puccini’s La Boheme to by e” tiv Parisian bohemians of success, and health (and health insurance) are vital — a first ven “in d an g” iled as “glitterin ha s wa — k Yor w Ne the 9 g 198 encounter with Rent might also be a revelation. , winnin ckly became a sensation

When people see Rent, either the a for g the New York Times. It qui nin run play or movie, they d a Pulitzer for drama, see a character who gleefully n lto mi Tony for best musical an Ha bends gendered expectations ing lud inc — ple peo ny ma ing and uses different pronouns in full 12 years, and inspir different situations, two queer in a different da — to look at musicals interracial couples, and frank creator Lin-Manuel Miran discussion of living with (and sometimes dying from) HIV and way.

AIDS that, though encapsulated of the Rent tackled the frustrated, defiant aftermath in

time with references to AZT and at cters ACT UP, serves to normalize chara ive posit HIV the conversation -- all of which first wave of the AIDS crisis, putting cters is well within the bounds of chara r quee with se, diver ly erate everyday life for the characters. the forefront. It was delib was held It . leads black and anic Hisp red featu

and a cast that Just that little glimpse of queer at gentrification life in a tiny part of Manhattan in 1989 together by alt-rock and grunge. It sneered ord, Benny — and with a small group of friends can be — embodied by Taye Diggs’s sellout landl truth, no matter tic artis your living of es life-changing. How many people can trumpeted the virtu Framke, Vox got.” – Caroline ed, say Rent played a part in helping them how grimy thingsAs time has pass new generations

understand their gender, sexuality, or i, Mark, Mim er, Rog of y stor the r discove both? ins, Benny, Maureen, Joanne, Angel, Coll

For others still, it might help expose and familiarize ugh thro ggle stru they and all the rest as them with identities and realities within the LGBTQ+ community, like ts cep relationships, love, capitalist con historical nuance be damned. Rent’s ubiquity, especially in AIDS, and n, ictio add ily, fam t”, ren ing “pay high school theatre and chorus canon, means countless young the end of the 20th century. people will more than likely sing or hear “Seasons of Love” at least once before their secondary educational career is out.

The immediacy of the show is still remarkable. It’s characters grapple with the physical and psychological struggles faced by people with HIV and AIDS. Love and loss seep into every corner of the script, every line of song. Rent is at once suspended in time and timeless. It’s impact can still be felt today and likely will for generations to come.

C L O S E T | April 2018 | 27 C L O S E T | April 2018 | 27

The Empty Closet had the chance to speak with the tour’s Angel, Aaron Alcaraz, on the phone earlier in March. He shared his experiences on tour with one of the world’s best-known shows and what it’s like to inhabit such an iconic role.

Tell our readers a bit about the impact RENT has had on you? As a performer? As a person?

“I was first introduced to RENT with the [2005] movie – when the original production premiered on Broadway I was two years old, so I can’t claim to be an original RENThead! It has had such an amazing impact on me. Angel was always a dream role for me…just the amount of confidence and love Angel is able to share with the world is inspirational. When I actually got [this] role, I was SO excited! Not only is it the role of a lifetime, but we are working with the original production team from the 1996 stage production. To have their stamp of approval on my version of Angel is just amazing.

RENT is challenging subject matter, and it’s challenging to perform. What is your mindset as you bring the musical to audiences new and old?

What has it been like as a cast to step into such legendary roles in a show that is known across the world?

As a cast we really work to connect to the heart of the show and importance of the story. I think because most of our cast grew up with the show and now working with the original production team, we’ve been able to bring new energy and connection to our roles. We’re putting something up on stage that someone in the audience could be living.

When I got the role, I was thinking of my incredible predecessors – Wilson [Jermaine Heredia] and Justin [Johnson] to name just two – and that I was going to do it right, do it justice.

It’s definitely challenging. Our cast is so connected to each other and the truth of this show, so that makes a big difference.

We’ve performed this in some less accepting places in our country and sometimes we come back from intermission and half of the audience is gone – the seats are empty.

There are times when I am in full Angel “getup” and I’m singing about love and I can just What’s been your favorite feel animosity from the audience. It can be location on tour so far?

Is there a particular part of the hard to bring that message of love when

Top 3 would have to be Fort Worth, show that you relate to? you’re not feeling it in return, but I think of Texas – they had great breakfast – Denver, how important this show is and how loved Colorado, and Atlanta. Gorgeous historic

Absolutely those themes of love and cherished these roles and messages are. theatres and wonderful audiences. I’m excited It really resonates with people. and acceptance are so important. I fall in love to visit Rochester though! I’m planning to take with this show each night – which isn’t always a quick trip down to Ithaca too and see my the case when you do something every single alma mater with another cast member who day for over a year. is an Ithaca College grad.

So much of the show is rooted in the time it was written: do you find the themes and messages of RENT still resonate with audiences, or has it taken on new interpretations?

I think the show transcends time. RENT is still so relevant. It’s about real people going through real struggles and those messages of finding joy in every moment and living each day to its fullest are so important. I take my lead from Angel and try to portray that idea of love. It’s been a really affecting experience. A diverse cast speaking on love is so powerful and so necessary, especially today.

What can Rochester audiences expect from the show when it comes to town in early May?

They can definitely expect young, fresh energy! We haven’t changed the show they know and love, it’s true to its origin, but we don’t try to copy anyone else. We like to play and keep it fresh. We’re so excited to bring RENT to Rochester!

28 | April 2018 | E M P T Y

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APRIL EVENTS THURSDAY, APRIL 4

INQUEERY PRESENTS: LGBTQ First-Time Home Buyers with the Norselli Team – 7–8pm, free and open to all

FRIDAY, APRIL 6

GALLERY Q “18 EMERGING” OPENING RECEPTION – 6–9pm, drinks and snacks provided, open to all

E M P T Y

OUT IN PRINT: THURSDAY, APRIL 19

BERLIN 1936 / Sixteen Days in August

WINE & INVESTING 101 – 5:30–8pm, Get a crash course in both wine and investing in this innovative class in partnership with Mass Mutual at The Daily Refresher, free with registration at bit.ly/WineInvest101

SATURDAY, APRIL 21

FULL CIRCLE INTERGENERATIONAL BRUNCH – 12–2pm, catered meal with speakers: “Teens & Older Adults Tell Their Stories”, all are welcome, RSVP by 4/18 to Eri at erim@outalliance. org or 585.244.8640 x23

by OLIVER HILMES translated from the German by Jefferson Chase

INQUEERY MOVIE NIGHT OUT: “Get Real” – 7–9pm, free, drinks and snacks provided

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 25

Review by: TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER

FRIDAY, APRIL 13

INQUEERY PRESENTS: ‘Getting to Know Trillium Health’ – 7–8pm, open community presentation, all are welcome!

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 11

OUT IN THE STICKS: Dansville Meetup – 5–7pm, Jack’s Gaslight Inn, good food good company, contact annet@outalliance.org

ROC YOUTH DRAG MOVIE CLUB – 6–8pm, free and open to youth 13–20

SAGE HAPPY HOUR – 5–7pm at Avenue Pub, all are welcome, drink specials & good food, annet@outalliance.org

THURSDAY, APRIL 26

MONDAY, APRIL 16

Q-MANITY – 4:30–5:30pm, open to all LGBTQ+ youth 13–20, open discussion and support

LORA DRUMMING CIRCLE MEETUP AT MYSTIC TREASURES – 6:30–9pm, RSVP at Cobb’s Hill Drum Circle on Meetup, AnneT@outalliance.org or 585.244.8640 x23

FRIDAY, APRIL 27

TUESDAY, APRIL 17

SAGE SOCIAL WORKER SUPPORT – 11am-3pm, Kat Carr, LMSW, is available on-site to consult on issues around aging; housing options, home care, caregiving, benefits, etc.

ROC YOUTH U DJ DANCE – 7–10pm, free and open to youth 13–20, you bring the music!

CAREGIVER SUPPORT GROUP – 5:30–6:30pm, facilitated by Mara Kourides, MSW from Lifespan

SATURDAY, APRIL 28

INTERGENERATIONAL TRANS COMMUNITY DINNER - 7–8:30pm, free catered social dinner, all are welcome!

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 18

INQUEERY PRESENTS: ‘Gender & The Media Class 6: Further Off the Straight and Narrow – 6–8pm, all are welcome!

For weekly, monthly, and ongoing events, see our ongoing calendar!

RIDE FOR PRIDE DRAG SHOW – 6:30–8:30pm, join in on the fun and raise money for our fabulous bike ride fundraiser!

MONDAY, APRIL 30

INQUEERY PRESENTS ‘Bingo at the Brewery’ Drag Queen Bingo with Vivian Darling, Ms. Figgy Pudding & Miss Frankie Starr - Doors 6:30pm, games begin 7pm, Three Heads Brewing, 21+ event, $5 donation at the door

Keep up to date with new events follow us on Facebook @OutAllianceRoc

(all events at LGBTQ Resource Center unless otherwise noted)

C L O S E T | April 2018 | 29

|

See our online community calendar at: bit.ly/RocLGBTQCal

See page 16 for ongoing SAGE event information

Y

ou are not alone.

While you may be the only person in the room, you are one of many.

Every word you’ve written was written before. Every place you’ve visited has been seen by other eyes. The things you experience have been done elsewhere. You’re not alone: in “Berlin 1936” by Oliver Hilmes, an entire city rushes to an end.

On the first day of the 1936 Berlin Olympics, composer Richard Strauss is impatient. He hates sports and he hates the tax that’s been enacted for this sporting event. For the hymn he writes on behalf of it, he demands 10,000 reichsmarks, and it rankles him that he ends up taking less.

Tom Wolfe has been to Berlin many times, and he couldn’t pass up a chance to see the Olympics there. Berlin is vibrant, friendly, and Berliners love the American novelist. He loves them… until a society matron whispers secrets in his ear.

On the second day of the Olympics, Toni Kellner is found dead in her apartment. She was not a social woman – in fact, she was not a woman at all, and Nazi-enforced edicts made her afraid to seek help for her bad heart. Berlin used to have a thriving gay community, but the Third Reich is über-aware of gay men and people like Toni now.

Joseph Goebbels can’t stop thinking about the trouble his wife put him in. Not only did she have an affair with a swindler some years ago, but something else recently came to light: the Nazi Minister of Propaganda’s wife was the child of a Jewish man.

Jesse Owens won gold. And again. And again. And again.

By the eighth day of the Olympics in Berlin, the city’s Roma and Sinti populations are taken from their apartments and moved to a sliver of land near a sanitation field. Most of them will die in concentration camps similar to the one being built just forty minutes away by local train.

And by the end of the Olympics, Hitler “is already determined to go to war.”

It may seem trite to say that “Berlin 1936” reads like a novel, but it does.

It’s nonfiction that reads like a horror novel, with a swirl of unaware and innocent victims, ruthless killers, and a stunning, invisible stream of ice just beneath its surface.

The compelling thing about that is that it’s not one large tale of the Nazis and the Games; instead, it’s as if author Oliver Hilmes starts with major historical figures and adds little Advent-calendar windows with real people inside: here’s the Roma child, snatched from her bed; there’s the terrified, ailing transvestite; here’s the American woman who kissed Hitler; there’s the Romanian Jew who owns a thriving nightclub; all in the middle of an international story that readers know is only the beginning... How could you resist?

Don’t even try. Instead, just take “Berlin 1936” to a corner and don’t count on coming out for a good, long time. Start this book, and you’ll want to just be left alone.

30 | April 2018 | E M P T Y

OUTLOOK:

What’s Bothering Brandon?

C L O S E T

By: BRANDON W. BROOKS

Jeffrey Dahmer Calling You by Your Name

Spring has finally sprung in Rochester, and I am all the happier for it. Most of my readers should know by now that I despise the winter.

From the very first snowflake, my hatred begins. At no point may I enjoy it in the least. Some say that they enjoy the snow and winter up until the New Year – I have no such tolerance. In my opinion, global warming cannot come soon enough. At least I’ll be dead by the time the coastlines flood.

This winter I went to the movies to try and cure my cabin fever. I saw both My Friend Dahmer and Call Me by Your Name – two drastically different films about gay men, and relationships between gay men. The resolutions of both narratives, however, parallel one another in that they display the all-too-common troupe of being gay leading to disappointment, loneliness, and a future of uncertainty. Snoozeville.

Granted, both films take place in the past, a time when begin gay hadn’t the opportunities afforded to it that it does today. The trajectory of My Friend Dahmer could not be changed – the story was based upon real, and heinous, events that took place in reality, resulting in Dahmer going on to become a serial killer who was later convicted, and murdered himself in prison by another inmate. Call Me by Your Name, being fictional, could have ended on a better note in my opinion. Elio ends up alone, his lover choosing to marry a women (out of convenience?), and even goes as far as to call Elio and inform him of this. The film ends with Elio processing the news juxtaposed against a background of merry holiday preparation.

I am so sick of gay people and their lives being portrayed through tragic narratives. Yes, these narratives are faithful to a part of our history that is tragic, but why stay faithful to only that aspect? Why not create a new, modern narrative with gay people in happy, dare I say, even boring relationships without tragedy? I don’t find poignancy in continued, persistent tragedy – it only works to annoy me. I’d like to see a story that portrays gay people as agents of their own destiny, not victims of their circumstances or lot in life. It’s just so, feeble to me, and I’m not impressed.

So many people are lauding Call Me by Your Name as a critical success – maybe it has raked in the dough but dude, I was bored. Oh, a magical European vacation leading to a tragic, and secret, summer triste between two men – how original. Perhaps it is anachronistic of me to expect a film set in the past to illustrate how same-sex relationships between men can be fulfilling, sustained, and long-lasting with characters that do not succumb to societal pressure. On the other hand, Elio’s parents admit in the film that they were fully aware of his affair with a man, and were in support of it, even encouraging – how is that representative of the past?

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For event details, reservations, maps & more, visit:

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At least Dahmer had some agency to his character; he actually took action and possession of his own destiny. Yes – I realize I am preferring the motives and actions of a very real serial killer over that of a fictitious gay boy, but honestly, to me My Friend Dahmer was more believable in its narrative and characterization. Maybe this is due to the events in this film being based upon real life circumstances, while Call Me

by Your Name is not. Who knows?

To be sure, both films close with their main characters ending up alone, directly due to their positions in life as gay men – Jeffrey fills the emptiness of his existence with murder and malignancy, while Elio leaves the audience in complete speculation. Overall, we’re left with feelings of either fear and disgust, or sadness and uncertainty. In my own opinion, it’s time for something different. We are more than sad, lonely, introspective people, or sexually deviant murderers.

So for now I’ll stick to E. M. Forster’s Maurice, written over one hundred years ago. Even this distant narrative has its very gay Edwardian men living happily ever after. Imagine.

FEARLESS IS BEING YOU I am an ally because I love people unconditionally. As an ally for our company’s LGBTQ employees, I hope to bring support, understanding and teach others how to be empathetic when they might not otherwise consider others’ perspectives.

Join us the 2nd Thursday of every month. Locations vary.

EMAIL HRCSecondThursday@gmail.com or follow us on FB @HRCSecondThursday for details on upcoming events.

32 | April 2018 | E M P T Y

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E M P T Y

Want to hone your journalism or interview skills? We want to hear from YOU!

If you have an idea for a print article, submit it to the editor at rowanc@outalliance.org with title [EC Print Submission Idea] followed by a brief description of your pitch. Submit ideas by the following (2018) dates for consideration in the following month’s publication:

PRINT CONTENT DEADLINE IS THE 10TH OF THE MONTH PRIOR TO PUBLICATION.

In the event the 10th falls on a weekend, the closest business day following the 10th will serve as content deadline, unless a previous agreement between contributor and editor has been reached.

Online content has no deadline and no word count. Please submit article ideas, opinion pieces, reviews, and more for online publication to rowanc@outalliance.org with the title [EC Online Submission Idea] followed by a brief description.

We all should know that diversity makes for a rich tapestry, and we must understand that all the threads of the tapestry are equal in value no matter what their color.

MAYA ANG ELOU

AN GE LI NA JO LI E

Are you interested in adding a new voice to the Empty Closet?

r strength. What Our diversity is ou ss life it would a dull and pointle s the same. be if everyone wa

WRITE FOR THE EC!

C L O S E T | April 2018 | 33

We all live with the objective of being happy; our lives are all different and yet the same.

ANNE FRANK

We can’t wait to hear from you!

Submission does not guarantee publication.

DUE

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JULY 26TH

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DEC DUE

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CALL FOR SUBMISSIONS: Amanda & Katharina’s Interview Series

WHERE THE IDEA FOR AN INTERVIEW SERIES CAME FROM: Amanda Cole and Katharina Jackson will bring you monthly interviews of kickass LGBTQ+ community members, starting in April. They both work in the service industry in Rochester and are frequently seen behind the bar. Here’s what they had to say, and how you can get involved.

Unfortunately, the two of us have never had the privilege of working together. We frequently find ourselves getting together after our shifts and talking about the inspiring LGBTQ+ people we get to meet in our highly public line of work. We can’t wait to tell each other about our favorite patron of the night and we’ll end up talking for hours about the LGBTQ+ community we wish we could do more with and for. We knew we wanted to contribute our own sass and queerness to the EC and we found our answer.

So not every person fits into the little rooms we build to hold them. There are infinite combinations of human and inhuman, male and female, brown and white.

LILA BOWEN, Wake of Vultures

I can imagine nothing more terrifying than an Eternity filled with men who were all the same. The only thing which has made life bearable…has been the diversity of creatures on the surface of the globe.

T.H. WHITE, The Book of Merlyn

JUNE -

WHAT WE HOPE TO DO WITH OUR INTERVIEW SERIES:

Our interviews will be female/femme LGBTQ+ focused but certainly not exclusively so. While everyone we interview will be comfortably “out” of the closet we do want to send our love and respect to everyone worthy of an interview that’s not able to be “out.” Please nominate other out members of the community you would like to see interviewed. We LOVE to meet new folks! Each month’s interview will have a slightly different focus i.e. health, artists, activists, performers, and businesses.

We are presently looking to interview anyone in the community who works in the wedding business!

Please email us at AKInterviews@outalliance.org with any nominations of folks to interview!

you in your boat Although we are in different boats, same river of life. and we in our canoe, we share the CHIE F ORE N LYON S, Onondaga Nation

Compiled by: RON COOK

E M P T Y

What’s come between you?

Maybe it’s poor communication, a lack of trust, a loveless or sexless relationship, infidelity, or the excessive use of porn and social media.

Trust Kavod Center to help you get past the struggle and on to the healing.

KavodRecovery.com | 585.546.5180

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THE SCENE :

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1 Senior Service Provider SafeZone Training / 2 United Way Labor Recognition Dinner - Bess Watts Community Service Award 3 Ambush Rochester - Dicky’s Pub / 4 Drag Story Hour @ the Rochester Public Library - Cody Gardner / 5 Drag Bingo

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6 Portraits of Perseverance Exhibit / 7 EC Launch Party and ROC PRIDE Theme Reveal / 8 EC Launch Party - Scotty Ginnett 9 EC Launch Party - A3 Design & Miss Deelicious / 10 Portraits of Perseverance Exhibit - Chasmar Wells

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