Gaylaxy March Issue

A Monthly Gay e-zine

www.gaylaxymag.com

March 2010

GAYLAXY

Vol I Issue III

EMPOWERING EXPRESSIONS

To Sir, With Love: A Tribute to Justice Shah

Credits

Editor’s Note Volume 1 | Issue 3 | March 2010 Editor-in-Chief: Sukhdeep Singh Editors: Siddhant Pattanaik Shreya Jain Sukanya Mahata Contributing Writers: Zain Awan Rohan Naronha Karan Sood Pratyush Mukhopadhyaya Cover by: Pawan Koserwal Design: Peeyush Jain Pawan Koserwal Mukesh Prasad Nayan Ostwal Web: Apurv Gupta Marketing & Advertising: Divir Tiwari

Published from: Kolkata, India Email: editor.gaylaxy@gmail.com

Welcome back to the all new avatar of Gaylaxy.

Hope you all had a lovely Valentine's Day and an equally joyous Holi. The last month has been quite “happening”.

Gaylaxy not only extended its reach, but also caught the eye of Time Out Magazine, Delhi. Clearly, we have developed a readership from all over India and this has prompted us to move beyond the eastern zone.

Nevertheless, the articles published in Gaylaxy had a universal appeal. But even as we expand ourselves, Kolkata would always remain close to our heart.

You would find new sections and columns dealing with a range of topics from Science and Health, Lifestyle to Leisure. We introduce you to Bhola Da, who would talk to you about matters pertaining to sexual health in all subsequent issues. Also, get to know what this month has in store for you through Tarot predictions by Rohan. At this point, I would like to especially thank Henry Juhala who agreed to a request to write on the ongoing Prop 8 case of California. February saw one of the finest judges of IndiaJustice A. P. Shah, retiring. His non-elevation to Supreme Court would remain a topic of debate. Our cover story remains a tribute to this exemplary person whose judgments have had a far-reaching consequence on various matters. The AMU controversy just goes on to show that perceptions among a large section are yet to change. All eyes would also be set on Supreme Court when it hears the petition filed against judgment on 377.

Yet, don't let the spirit die. With so many upcoming film festivals, there's plenty to look forward to in this month too. We do hope you would like the re-invented Gaylaxy.

With love Sukhdeep Singh Editor-in-Chief Gaylaxy

Website: www.gaylaxymag.com

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FEEDBACK

Mailbox

Pg 4

COVER STORY

A Tribute to Justice A.P. Shah

Pg 5

Inside this issue

WORLD

Californication

Pg 9

G-NEWS

G-News

Pg 14

CURRENT AFFAIRS

Sec 377: A New Line of Offense

Pg 15

EVENTS

A Season of Film Fests

Pg16

SCIENCE & HEALTH

The Biology of Homosexuality

Pg 17

Ask Bhola Da

Pg 19

LIFESTYLE

Men’s Zone

Pg 20

Animal Adoption

Pg 22

PERSONALS

Paradise Lost or Regained?

Pg 24

Gay Musings

Pg 26

My Coming Out Tale

Pg 27

A Big Booo to Archies

Pg 30

LITERATURE

Poems Short Story: Desires

Pg 31

Pg 32

LEISURE

Cinema

Pg 34

Test Your GQ

Pg 35

Let The Cards Speak

Pg 36

NGO

NGO in Focus: Swikriti

Pg 38

NGO List

Pg 39

Feedback

MAILBOX

/ Wonderful

/ Hey, it's a wonderful initiative to

job Sukhdeep and a l l w h o contributed. The magazine was very well done. Balanced articles. Great layout with both serious and fun content.

Kudos and best wishes as you grow your magazine and your readership base. HAPPY VALENTINES DAY to you and all your readers. - Henry Juhala, USA

connect to so called straight people as well.

The Feb issue is rocking as well...Way to go. Neon, Kolkata

/ My heartfelt wishes for your new venture. -Abhishek Roy, Kolkata

/ It's a very good thing that u have started. Do continue in future – Vulthikana, Kolkata

/ Thank you Gaylaxy / Thanks...I love your site!

Magazine for showcasing the plight of the Gays in Uganda. I appreciate your team's effort to feature the plight in your magazine. Best of luck and keep up the important work in bringing voice to those that may not be able to. - Marcel Duvoix, USA

–Alex

/ Really a great idea! Please convey if any efforts need from my side to the success of the Magazine – Narendra, Hyderabad

/ The Gay life in Kolkata is really colourless compared to Delhi, Mumbai, Bangalore or any Metro cities. Here there is only a theoritical word called "culture" but nothing else. But it seemed that Kolkata has woken up. We all want to see a grand success of GAYLAXY and we are all behind you.- Aakash, Kolkata

/ I'm usually bouncing throughout the online world most of the time. As a result, I tend to peruse a good deal, which unfortunately isn't always a good thing as most of the sites I see are made up of unnecessary nonsense copied from some other web sites. Nonetheless I have to compliment you because this page is in actual fact not bad at all and even seems to have a bit of unique substance, therefore many thanks for splitting the pattern of solely copying other people's websites- Zynga Facebook (Zynga is a gaming company behind the popular Facebook app FarmVille and other online games)

/ Happy to know about Indian gay magazine. Best wishes – Corby

/ The issue looks great! Congratulations and of course I am happy to see a good coverage of our festival Kashish. – Sridhar Rangayan, Mumbai

/ This is also an otherwise fabulous issue.

– Anindya Hajra, Kolkata

/ This is a really great site, also love & thanks for understanding our feelings Somu, Jamshedpur

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CoverStory

H

e is a man who would always be credited with setting a community, whose existence this society always denied, free from the shackles of shame and harassment. At a time when the Indian Government itself was split over whether it should support the case or go against it, he stuck to the principles of justice and through his well articulated judgment, showed that a society should be “inclusive”, and a country should be non-discriminating against its own citizens. He has not only been the messiah of the LGBT community, but also of poor people at large, who, through his rulings found justice.

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He has been credited with a number of historical rulings. Although he retired in February with a “hurt feeling” that he was never elevated to Supreme Court, he has surely left his mark on the pages of history. For a man of such stature, and as a community who would always be indebted to him, Gaylaxy pays its tribute to Justice A.P. Shah through this article and analyses how his various verdicts and landmark judgments have had a major impact on society.

Biography Justice Ajit Prakash Shah was born on 13 February, 1948 at Solapur and hailed from a family of lawyers, lending him a deep

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CoverStory understanding of legal matters from an early age. Upon completing his graduation from Solapur, Justice Shah obtained his law degree from Government Law College, Mumbai. After practicing at the District Court in Solapur for a short period, Justice Shah shifted to the Bombay High Court in 1977 and joined the chambers of the then-leading Advocate Shri S.C. Pratap, gaining experience in civil, constitutional, service and labour matters. He was appointed as an Additional Judge of Bombay High Court on 18 December, 1992 and became the permanent Judge of Bombay High Court on 8 April, 1994. He assumed charge as the Chief Justice of Madras High Court on 12 November, 2005 and was transferred as the Chief Justice of the Delhi High Court on 7 May, 2008.

(Acquisition) Act highlighting the restrictions and dereservation of forest and use of forest land for non forest use and issued directions to save Hill Stations like Mahabaleshwar and Panchgani.

Protection of disabled person: Justice Shah adopted a proactive stance towards the rights of disabled persons. In one judgment, he restrained the Central and Western Railways, Railway Police and Municipal Corporation from taking any action against the blind vendors/hawkers and directed them to frame a scheme for earning of their livelihood. In another case, he protected the rights of students suffering from Dyslexia and issued directions to ensure implementation of reservation policy for disabled in the State Government and State Corporations as well as local bodies. He also ordered Railways and Metropolitan Transport Corporation, Chennai to ensure barrier free environment in their premises and directed the MTC to make their buses disabled friendly. Besides, he initiated steps to make the Chennai High Court disabled friendly.

PIL: While in Bombay Court, in July 2004, a division bench led by Justice A.P. Shah imposed a penalty of Rs 20 lakhs on Shiv Sena and BJP for a bandh called in by the party, as such bandhs. The bench held that no political party had any legal right to call for a bandh and such a bandhs encroached upon the fundamental rights of citizens and political parties could not hold the public members at ransom. He also issued various directions for reforms of prisons, particularly in the context of women prisoners and their children, as well as for proper rehabilitation of nearly 2000 families displaced by Tarapur project. Furthermore, Justice Shah recognized the rights of AIDS patients in employment.

Decriminalizing Homosexuality: The bench comprising of Justice A.P. Shah and Justice S. Muralidhar, on 2nd July, 2009, ruled that Sec 377 would no longer apply to consenting adults engaging in same- sex relations. The judgment was based on strong

Rulings Though his name would probably become (rather has become) synonymous with the ruling on Sec 377, Justice Shah's other verdicts in various cases have had an equal impact on the society, if not less. Whether it came to protecting the rights of AIDS patients in employment or initiating prison reforms, his judgments have always been hailed as landmark. Some of the more important ones that he delivered are: Freedom of Speech and Expression: In 1997, in Anand Patwardhan vs. Union of India case, Justice Shah quashed the orders of the Government not to telecast the President's Award winning documentaries -“In Memory of Friends� (based on terrorism and violence in Punjab) and 'Ram Ke Naam' (based on Ayodhya issue)- and directed Doordarshan to telecast the said documentaries.

Women Related Laws: Recognized the right of Muslim women to receive maintenance under Sections 125 and 127 beyond iddat period and the right of second wife to receive maintenance under Hindu Marriage Act. Environment and Ecological matters: Issued directions for beautification and maintenance of Girgaon Chowpaty and Juhu Beach. Interpreted Maharashtra Forest

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CoverStory scientific evidences that pointed to the fact that homosexuality is not unnatural and NACO's recommendation that Sec 377 was a major impediment in the fight against HIV/AIDS. RTI Act: In another landmark judgment, a bench comprising of Justice Shah, Justice S. Muralidhar and Justice Vikramjit Sen held that the office of the Chief Justice of India (CJI) is a “public authority” that comes within the ambit of the Right to Information (RTI) Act and the senior most judge is obliged to share details of his assets under this act, thus bringing CJI under the purview of RTI. Pro-poor Rulings: Justice Shah has also delivered rulings that have protected the poor from harassment. Pointing that “poverty is not a crime”, he prevented Delhi Govt. from sending a large number of beggars to their native state. Again, during the chilling winter, when the MCD demolished a night shelter for the homeless on Pusa road, he took note of a newspaper article and rebuked MCD for such an inhuman act.

Other laws: Delivered several important judgments pertaining to Admiralty Act, Trade Mark and Patent Act, Service and Labour laws.

basic concepts of right to dignity, privacy, equality and non-discrimination. It also clearly differentiated between public morality and constitutional morality. Explaining how Sec 377 violated Article 21 of Indian Constitution, which guaranteed the right to privacy and dignity, the Justices had said, “In the Indian Constitution, the right to live with dignity and the right of privacy both are recognized as dimensions of Article 21. Section 377 IPC denies a person's dignity and criminalizes his or her core identity solely on account of his or her sexuality and thus violates Article 21 of the Constitution.”

Furthermore, the meaning of sex in Article 15 was construed to include under its realm sexual orientation. “Article 15 prohibits discrimination on several enumerated grounds, which include 'sex'...We hold that sexual orientation is a ground analogous to sex and that discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation is not permitted by Article 15.

Further, Article 15(2) incorporates the notion of horizontal application of rights… In our view, discrimination on the ground of sexual o r i e n t a t i o n i s impermissible even on the horizontal application of the right enshrined under Article 15,” they declared.

Another key argument used by the Govt. in this case was that of “public morality”.

However, the court ruled that public morality was based on shifting and subjecting notions of right and wrong and that if there was any type of “morality” that could pass the test of compelling state interest, it must be “constitutional” morality and not public morality. “To stigmatise or to criminalise homosexuals only on account of their sexual orientation would be against the constitutional morality,” the court held.

Elucidating on how Sec 377 was in violation of the equality granted to every citizen by the Constitution, the Judges added, “A provision of law branding one section of people as criminal based wholly on the State's moral disapproval of that class goes counter to the equality guaranteed under Articles 14 and 15 under any standard of review.”

Reforms On a personal level too, Justice Shah directed various steps for computerisation and networking of all courts in Tamil Nadu, including introduction of touch-screen kiosks, digital boards etc. He took leading role in organizing the programmes relating to sensitization of Judicial Officers, Judges, Family Court Judges etc regarding Gender Justice and organized various training programmes for imparting training to Judicial Officers on the subject of Juvenile Justice with the help of TISS and UNICEF. He gave impetus to mediation movement in Maharashtra, recognized movement of Lok Adalat and also started Pension Lok Adalats.

Analyzing the 377 Judgment The judgment on Sec 377 is based on four

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CoverStory Finally, the judges cited Pandit Nehru's speech delivered while moving the 'Objective Resolution' on December 13, 1946, “Words are magic things often enough, but even the magic of words sometimes cannot convey the magic of the human spirit and of a Nation's passion…” and concluded that the underlying theme of the Indian Constitution is that of 'inclusiveness'.

The golden words that would remain ingrained were thus spoken: We declare that Section 377 IPC, insofar it criminalises consensual sexual acts of adults in private, is violative of Articles 21, 14 and 15 of the Constitution. The provisions of Section 377 IPC will continue to govern non-consensual penile non-vaginal sex and penile non-vaginal sex involving minors.

morality, not public morality, had to be considered. Though he had delivered a hi stori cal verdi ct, Justi ce Shah was apprehensive of the reactions that it would receive and also pointed out how ironical the whole situation had been. “I did not switch on TV channels till late in the evening because I was not sure about the reactions from various quarters. When I attended a workshop with some German members and also some gay rights activists in 1997, I had categorically said to them that it would be very difficult for an Indian court to legalise homosexual sex. I did not realise it then that I would be deciding the issue one day.”

Whether it was the judgment on Sec 377 or protection of the rights of disabled, poor or AIDS patients, inclusiveness has been a key feature of Justice Shah's verdicts. The fact that one of the senior-most High Court chief justices was never elevated to Supreme Court would raise questions about the procedure followed by the Collegium. The respect that he has earned for his impactful judgments go far beyond any worldly positions. It is no wonder that an online petition for having Justice Shah as the next Central Information Commissioner (CIC) was launched a day after his retirement and has gone on to receive support from various quarters. While the judgment on Sec 377 is being contested in the Supreme Court, the whole gay fraternity can only be thankful to him for letting it breathe the air of freedom.

Justice Shah on 377 Admitting that the case pertaining to Sec 377 was a challenging one, Justice A.P. Shah, in an interview with The Indian Express Editor-inChief Shekhar Gupta on NDTV 24x7's Walk the Talk said, “The peculiar feature of this case was that the two wings of the government took diametrically opposite stands. The Health and Family Welfare Ministry took a stand that continuance of Section 377 was creating hurdles in the HIV-AIDS prevention programme. And the stand of the Home Ministry was that this Section should be retained on grounds of public morality. According to me, this was the biggest challenge.” Referring to the stand of public morality taken by the Government, he mentioned how social evils like 'sati' and 'untouchablility' too were largely approved by the public and that constitutional

“It's strange that a criminal can reside in the city but if someone is asking for alms, then he is thrown away.” “(The) Commonwealth Games is after 10 months, and for the city's beautification you will throw out people in a chilling winter like this?” (To MCD) “It cannot be forgotten that discrimination is antithesis of equality and that it is the recognition of equality which will foster the dignity of every individual.”

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World

Henry Juhala details about the politics behind Proposition 8 in California

B

etween 1980 and 2000 I attended a number of “gay weddings� in California.

Years later, in 2010, it sounds strange to call them weddings. None were legal or involved a license issued by the government; they were all ceremonial events between spouses of the same-gender. Even back then, many in the gay community rebelled against the use of the word marriage or wedding.

Instead, if performed by members of the clergy, they were called Holy Unions. Friends who did not want to associate their ceremony with heterosexual church weddings would call them Commitment Ceremonies. Of course, none of these ceremonies were legal in California or any other state.

That has changed in recent years.

Many of the fifty states, including California, now have legal same-gender marriages.

California is the most prominent in the news with its legal battles over Proposition 8 (Prop

8). Outsiders who do not understand U.S. marital and family law, tend to be very confused. It is further complicated by variations between state laws on marriage that affects only residents of a particular state like California vs. Federal law which affects all residents of the USA. It is like someone from the America trying to comprehend Indian laws like Section 377.

To help understand where California stands today regarding same-gender marriage (gay marriage), it is important to look at the key issues involved. How the present Prop 8 case is finally decided will have great impact on gay marriage laws elsewhere in the USA. It is also important to keep in mind that most U.S. citizens consider themselves Christians (primarily Protestant, Catholic or Jewish).

Much of their politics stem from the cultural structures influenced through these religious upbringings.

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World Gay Struggle in USA Prior to introduction of gay marriage, most U.S. residents had one universal concept of marriage. However, there really are two types of marriages. There is the ceremonial wedding or religious “rite” of marriage performed by a church clergy and then there are civil ceremonies. Both ceremonies may be performed with or without a marriage license.

A civil ceremony is usually done for fulfilling the requirements of a marriage license.

Much of the confusion and political struggle surrounding gay marriage stems from the succession of many laws originating in Europe. Most marital and family law in Europe changed based on the influence of the church, and the Monarch. Often, the head of the church in Europe was also the King or Queen and there was little separation of church and state.

In contrast, one of the founding principles of the USA was the clear separation of church and state. However, politicians and churches do not honor that separation in matters of marriage. On paper, marriage is a written legal contract signed by two parties and official witnesses for purposes of shared property, responsibilities and benefits. The arguments from the Abrahamic religions against gay marriage seem to forget that and focus on marriage solely as a sacred sacrament of the church for which the church has the ultimate authority.

In the 1980s there was a big rise in the influence of the Religious Right, a conservative segment which had strong ties with conservative Protestants.

Fundamentalist Protestants (Evangelicals) aligned themselves with Catholics, Mormons, Orthodox Jews and other conservative religious groups in order to gain support for opposition to gay rights. Most hold to a belief in the literal and legal interpretation of the Bible whereby gays are considered an abomination worthy of being put to death and marriage is reserved exclusively to being between one man and one woman, where sex is allowed only for purposes of procreation.

Other minority religious groups like Islam and Hinduism have also joined the fervent campaign against gay marriage with similar arguments.

A d m i t t e d l y, t h i s i s a n o v e r simplification. Very few Christians would seek

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to put gays to death or use sex solely for procreation. On the other side, there indeed are conservative politicians and religious groups who are for gay marriage and some liberals who are against it. A key center for many of the conservative religious groups is Southern California. It is home to some of the largest churches and the fastest growing Protestant denominations in the nation.

California has become the battleground for many of their political and social issues. A popular saying is “as goes California, so goes the rest of the country”. This has historically been true of marriage and family law on issues like divorce, adoption, medical rights, etc.

California has traditionally been viewed as politically progressive and has been fertile ground for development of gay rights. But, with big gains in conservative segments of the population and the insertion of confusion regarding the U.S. Doctrine of Separation of Church and State, anti-gay marriage forces have successfully thwarted much of that advancement. The Catholic Church issues decrees from The Vatican on how its local congregations in the U.S. should view gay marriage. They and the Mormon Church have funneled huge sums of money into fighting against gay marriage laws in California and other U.S. states.

A number of U.S. states allow citizens to initiate state law by signature petitions signed by a certain percentage of state voters. This helps voters circumvent the traditional means of state legislatures creating state laws. How legitimate these initiatives are under the Constitution of the U.S. is still under contention. That brings us to Prop 8 and its predecessor, Prop 22.

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World Historically Initiatives

Important

Acts

&

There are a few milestones in California that are important to know about 1975- Sexual acts performed in private by consenting adults were decriminalized.

1978- The Briggs Initiative (documented in the movie about Harvey Milk) was defeated by a slim margin. If passed, it would have banned gays, lesbians and their supporters from teaching in California schools.

1984- The State Assembly voted to alleviate job discrimination based on animus against gays. With pressure from the religious right, Gov. Deukmejian chose to veto the bill and it was defeated without sufficient votes to override it.

1993- Based on a court case in the State of Hawaii, the court decreed Hawaii's constitution required a compelling reason not to extend to gays the same rights that heterosexuals had.

1996- The U.S. Congress voted in a bill called the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA). This prevented same-gender couples from receiving the rights, benefits and responsibilities that heterosexuals received and prevented the federal government from recognizing any same-sex relationship. A majority of U.S. states followed with similar laws.

1999- California developed a Domestic Partner registry. It recognized the relationships of same-sex couples and straight couples over 62. It provided them with most, but not all of the rights, benefits and responsibilities of marriage.

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2000- There was fear that gays were gaining too many rights and that the exclusive definition of marriage as identified by the church was in jeopardy.

So, another initiative was born. It was California Proposition 22 also known as the California Defense of Marriage Act. Prop 22 refused to recognize gay marriages in the state even if those marriages were contracted in another state. A number of entities challenged Prop 22 as being unconstitutional.

Gradually, their challenges made their way up the court.

2003- Massachusetts ruled that gays had the same rights to marry as heterosexuals. Shortly thereafter Massachusetts implemented laws that gave gays in the state the same rights, benefits and responsibilities as heterosexual marriages.

2004- Mayor Newsom of San Francisco, California declared the County Clerk's office had the authority to issue licenses to same-gender couples. Licenses were granted for several weeks. Eventually the Supreme Court declared the county action as illegal and required them to go back to the original marriage codes. However, the court also said that San Francisco was free to challenge the constitutionality of the existing marriage laws. So the county of San Francisco took the challenge and filed a writ saying that "all California statutory provisions limiting marriage to unions between a man and a woman violate the California Constitution." This court challenge became known as “In re Marriage Cases“.

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World November 2008. There are gay marriages performed between May and November 2008 that are legal in California. After November 4th any gay marriages performed in California would be deemed invalid according to Prop 8. However, legal same-gender marriages performed in another state is considered valid in California.

While Prop 8 was still under consideration, people took steps to take the issue to the courts. Ted Olson and David Boies, two heavy-weight advocates, initiated the challenge in the court system. Both felt they had a constitutionally valid case for overturning Prop 8 for similar reasons that the prior California court ruled in favour of “In re Marriage Cases”.

Before the trial, Judge Vaughn authorized the use of cameras in courts to document the testimonies. That was later rescinded by SCOTUS (Supreme Court of US). But, it was used as an argument as to why some of the key expert witnesses against gay marriage bowed out. It seemed like Boies and Olson were highly prepared and the opposing legal team was not. It was almost as if they wanted to lose the case so they could take it to SCOTUS. That could backfire on the offchance that Vaughn's court upholds gay marriage in California and SCOTUS does not take the challenge to it.

Those opposing gay marriage view marriage the same way the Vatican or other church-state entities view it. Most of the interests they presented were the interests of conservative religious right folks seeking to deny the same basic civil rights to gays that heterosexuals have through their marriage contact.

It was made clear that what gays want was purely in the realm of civil rights under the Constitution. Gays are fine to leave

Prop 8 Fearing that the courts would rule in favour of gay marriage, a new initiative called Proposition 8 was called. It stated that marriage in California was between one man and one woman. With the initiative now on the ballots, the gay rights opponents tried to head off a final rule from the Supreme Court regarding “In re Marriage Cases”. But, the court declined. On May 15, 2008, the California Supreme Court ruled on “In re Marriage Case” in favour of gay marriage.

Predictably, immediate attempts were made to challenge this.

But, the court declared samegender marriages in California can proceed.

Remember this was May and there was a ballot initiative later in November to rule gay marriage is solely between a man and a woman. So, between May and November gays were allowed to marry in California.

Hence, from June 15, 2008 until November 5, 2008 California granted marriage licenses to same-gender couples. All that stopped on November 4, 2008, when California voters approved Prop 8 by a margin of 52% to 48%. In an ironic move, the courts shortly thereafter ruled that same-gender marriages performed in other states would be granted all the rights and privileges of marriage itself, but without using the word “marriage”. The court also ruled that all gay marriages performed before the November 4th vote would be valid.

Thus California has four sets of criteria regarding same-gender marriages.

There are gay marriages performed in San Francisco that were valid for about one month, but are now considered invalid unless there were re-marriages between May and Gaylaxy | Volume 1 | Issue 3 | March 2010

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World

Arguments Raised in Court against Prop 8 q Being gay is not a choice or disorder.

a

mental

q Animus against gays used by proponents of Prop 8 to secure vote. q How would gay marriages harm opposite-sex marriages? q Studies indicate gay families with two-couple spouses produce children as physically and mentally healthy as straight families. q Does denying gays the right to marry advance the state interests? the religious “rite� of marriage to the church and are willing to exempt church clergy from any legal requirements to marry gays. This takes away many of the fears and arguments by religious groups that they would be required to perform gay marriages against their personal or religious group's beliefs.

Lastly, there is a signature process underway in California to put an initiative on the ballot in 2010 to rescind the voter decision of Prop 8 that was voted on in 2008.

Considering the Prop 8 vote was 52 to 48%, gay marriage advocates feel the populace of the state are educated enough now that they would vote in favor of gay marriage a 2nd time. Either way, by vote or a court decision, gay marriage may once again be legal in California within a few years.

California. Time after time it is the courts that have come through and granted rights to gays that would not otherwise be granted by a vote of the people. It was things like Presidential declarations and the courts that granted rights to racial minorities in the U.S. before a vote of the people granted them. I feel confident the court will grant gays full rights as well. One of the key cases serving as a backdrop to gay marriage is a U.S. court case called Loving v.

Virginia. It is the case of an interracial couple who were granted marital rights before the general populace was ready to accept it. It took the lead on a case that had profound implications to the social fabric of the USA and the rest of the world. Today interracial relationships still may present themselves as a minor contentious issue. But, for the most part it is a non-issue. In the same manner it is believed gay marriage will be a non-issue in a generation or two. That gives the U.S. hope.

Hope Remains Alive The matter of gay marriage will also likely find its way to SCOTUS within a couple of years, with or without the help of this case from

Gaylaxy | Volume 1 | Issue 3 | March 2010

You can read the original article at our blog.

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G-NEWS

India G-NEWS

µ After the Election

Commission last year, Punjab

Government has also created a separate category in application forms – transgender- under which eunuchs can apply for government jobs. However, those selected under this category would be considered in the category of men.

Lending an ear to the agony of homosexual diplomats posted µ in India, Britain took up the matter of diplomatic visas for samesex partners of some of it diplomats with India's Ministry of External Affairs. Currently, partners of these diplomats stay here on tourist visas, which restricts them in many ways. Furthermore, India's changed visa rules are coming in the way of their continued stay, prompting the British Government to take up the matter.

µ The murderers

Charl van den Berg of Pushkin Chandra, 38, and his partner Kuldeep were

sentenced to rigorous life imprisonment. The brutal killings had rocked the nation in 2004, when the bodies of Pushkin and Kuldeep were found with multiple stabs and wounds at Chandra's residence in Delhi.

µ The number of petitioners petitioning against Delhi High Court's ruling on Sec 377 has gone up from two to 16. Supreme Court would hear the petition on 15th March.

µ Charl van den Berg, a 28-year old South African,

µ Mexico City joined the league of countries which

was crowned winner of Mr. Gay World 2010. Sadly, this year, there was no entry from India in this competition . µ France has become the first country in the world to remove gender identity disorder, also known as transexualism, from its list of officially recognised mental illnesses.

Senate rejected a bill to legalize same-sex marriage.

µ Moving ahead

µ The Sydney

with its sexual liberation movement, Nepal now has a sex aid store to boast of.

Started by Yubaraj Neupane, a 32 yr old former health worker, in Kathmandu, the store has sex aids ranging from toys to condoms.

allow same-sex weddings when it passed a law recognizing same-sex marriages on 4th March. The measure also allows same-sex couples to adopt children.

µ In a setback to gay rights in Australia, Australian Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras Festival, 2010 came to an end on 6th March after two weeks of celebration. The themes of this year's parade was Mardi Gras - History of the World.

µ With the Supreme

µ Ruling that

Fiji's Crime Decree doesn't have provisions criminalizing same- sex relations, the High Court of Fiji decriminalized homosexuality in the country.

Court of USA refusing to block the District of Columbia's gay marriage law, the city officially joined five states in allowing gay marriage in USA.

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Current Affairs

Sec- 377: New line of Offense

The whole of the gay community has its eyes set on 15th March- the day when Supreme Court hears the petitions filed by various groups against the 2nd July ruling of Delhi High Court on Section 377.

At last count, the tally stood at 16 for 2. Sixteen groups or organizations have joined hands and taken it on themselves the task of keeping India “morally” safe. The outnumbered two are Naz Foundation and Indian director and Rajya Sabha Member Shyam Benegal. With the bitter taste of defeat still fresh on their taste buds, the petitioners have this time decided to launch a fresh line of offensive, separate from the one's based on public morality.

A quick glance at some of the arguments lined up and Gaylaxy's comments in parentheses: ?

"Medical opinion" that only the vagina has the muscles required for sex, not the anus. (And “medical science” also says that homosexuality is not unnatural. Do they mean that each gay person engages in anal sex? What about those who don't prefer anal sex? Have they ever heard of a term called Lesbians?) ?

Expanding the constitutional right to non-discrimination to include sexual orientation could lead to demands for job reservations. (Our demands pertain to social recognition. Vote-bank politics is played by Indian politicians, and it is highly unlikely that anyone would dare do that in this case. As a matter of fact, people from the gay community belong to all spheres of life and religion.) ?

Indian cultural morality maybe ready for homosexuality in "50 or 100 years", not today.

(And who gets to decide that?) ?

Other arguments point to how disastrous it would be for Indian defence forces (probably inspired from USA's DADT policy, which is being reviewed and would most likely be scrapped) to concerns about child adoption by gays.

Though legal experts believe that the judgement given by Delhi High Court is very carefully worded and would be hard to challenge, the anxiety within the community cannot be denied. The Supreme Court had earlier refused to accord a temporary stay over Delhi High Court judgement.

However, among all this, the silence of Indian Government is conspicuous. Though the government has decided not to appeal against the judgement, it is a shame that our government cannot gather up enough courage to protect the rights of its own citizens and should remain a mute spectator in a case where the lives of millions of its citizens are involved. The fear of losing votes is holding the government to take a definitive stand and it is thus “playing safe”. One is forced to wonder had the British not legislated “unpopular acts” against Sati what would have been the fate of widowed women even today, given the Government's reluctance to act in such matters.

On the flip (and lighter) side, the judgement did achieve what no other event in recent history has been able to achieve so successfully- uniting the various religious bodies of this country (pun intended). How long this show of unity can last is a different question though. In the mean time, we can only wait with abated breath and wish the one's leading from the front good luck!

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Events It's raining film festivals; or so it seems. The just concluded Bangalore Queer Film Festival 2010 signaled commencement of a string of LGBT film fests to follow in the coming months in various parts of the country. Gaylaxy gives you a quick glimpse of what to expect at these film festivals and their scheduled dates; so that you can adjust your calendar accordingly and take out time to drop by.

Siddharth Gautam Film Festival, Kolkata: The season kick-starts with Siddharth Gautam Film Festival. To be held on March 21 in Siliguri and on March 26 and 27 in Kolkata, the festival is being co-organized by Koshish – Ek Asha, Northern Black Rose, People Like Us (PLUS) and Solidarity and Action Against The HIV Infection in India (SAATHII), Kolkata Office on behalf of the Coalition of Rights Based Groups (CRBG). Since 2003, the festival has been reaching out to audiences in both urban and rural areas in West Bengal and Orissa. This year the festival aims to highlight and support legal efforts to protect the rights of people living with HIV and decriminalize same-sex love in India.

Queer Nazariya, Mumbai- Being organized in collaboration with Majilis and to be held from 2nd-4th April, this three day festival promises

is a film by Saikat Das that has been selected for the Siddharth Gautam Film Festival. The movie features four homosexual men-“red”, “orange”, “green”, and “blue”, all of whom are deeply attracted to another man “white”. However, their attraction is completely based on their physical desire for the man. Moreover, “white” has feelings for another man “yellow”. In the end, all dreams are crushed when it is revealed that “white” is physically disabled. Everyone leaves “white” to cope with his turmoil alone, leaving him brokenhearted. It is then that a ray of hope comes in the form of a poor man “violet/Pink” for whom LOVE is the only thing to hold

“screening of exciting films from around the world”. There would also be discussions on a few key issues, showcasing of some queer art and memorabilia, parties, song and dance to keep the festival mood alive. With a number of short and full length features lined up, you dare not miss it. More details at www.queernazariya.weebly.com Kashish - Mumbai International Queer Film Festival - Mumbai will surely have a blast this April, with Kashish too being held from 22nd - 25th of the month at two different venues in the city. The festival is being organized

by Solaris Pictures and Bombay Dost with support from Movies That Matter and The Humsafar Trust. With a slew of films from over 25 countries, you would only be left wanting for more. More details at: www.mqff2010.blogspot.com DIALOGUES, Kolkata - This annual Calcutta LGBT Film & Video Festival is organized by Sappho for Equality & Pratyay Gender Trust in June. June would also see the Orissa leg of Siddharth Gautam Film Festival.

We would keep updating you with any other upcoming event. Until then, don't miss out these ones!

someone. For him, there is no place of material beauty and youthfulness, the only thing he desired for was patching up two hearts, two individuals. The film contains people from varied colours of life and their varied fascinations.

With very few dialogues, the movie is basically a flow of emotions. It promotes social awareness about how our lifestyle is affecting our psychologically.

The movie also drives home the point that though we often complain about lack of space and being trodden by the conventional straight thinking, we ourselves are not compassionate enough towards each other inside the community.

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Science & Health

THE BIOLOGY OF

H M SEXUALITY

H

-Agnivo Niyogi

omosexuality has long been considered unnatural and was categorized as a disease. After the historical judgment of Delhi High Court decriminalizing homosexuality last year, the debate was ignited yet again. That is why I thought of searching about the truth behind homosexuality. Is it truly unnatural? And being a student of life sciences I chose to look into the Biology of Homosexuality.

What makes the science in this case so problematic, quite apart from the usual technical difficulties inherent in biological research—particularly neurobiological research, which accounts for much of the present investigation—is the ineffable nature of our psychosexual selves.

This encompasses a vast universe of stimulation and response, of aesthetic and erotic sensibilities. There are those who see an element of hubris in the quest to explain such things in biological terms. Others see not so much hubris as hype: certain well-publicized findings, they fear, could turn out to be milestones on the road to an intellectual dead end. It is undeniably true that neurobiological research is often pursued in a context of great ignorance. The brain remains an organ of mystery even in general, not to mention with regard to specific functions. "We don't know" may be the most frequently used words in neurobiology, and they seem to be used with special frequency when the subject of sexual orientation comes up.

To write about a subject in one issue is next to impossible, so I have divided this topic into many parts and will deal with them in different issues.

History contains many evidences which might provide an insight into our research. So I chose to start with the The Historical Background in this issue. Hope you all will find it informative and interesting Homosexuality's invitation to biology has been standing for years. Homosexuals have long maintained that sexual orientation, far from being a personal choice or lifestyle (as it is often called), is something neither chosen nor changeable; heterosexuals who have made their peace with homosexuals have often done

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so by accepting that premise. The very term "sexual orientation", which in the 1980s replaced "sexual preference", asserts the deeply rooted nature of sexual desire and love.

Biologists embarked upon research into homosexuality in response to an intellectual vacuum created by the failure of other sciences to solve the riddle of sexual orientation. "Other sciences" mostly means psychiatry. As Michael Bailey and Richard Pillard-the authors of one of the most important genetic inquiries into homosexuality-have observed, decades of psychiatric research into possible environmental causes of homosexuality—that is to say, social and cultural causes—show "small effect size and are causally ambiguous."

As a distinct concept, homosexuality is relatively recent. David Halperin points out in One Hundred Years of Homosexuality that the term itself first appeared in German (Homosexualität) in a pamphlet published in Leipzig in 1869; it entered the English language two decades later. That some human beings engage in sexual activity with others of the same sex has, of course, been noted since antiquity. Historically, however, the focus was on the acts themselves rather than on the actors. The historian John Boswell, of Yale, has noted that during the Middle Ages "same-sex sex" was regarded as a sin, but those who committed that sin were not defined as constituting a type of people different from others. Between the sixteenth and the eighteenth century same-sex sex became a crime as well as a sin, but again, those who committed such crimes were not categorized as a class of human being. This changed in the nineteenth century, when modern medicine and particularly the science of psychiatry came to view homosexuality as a form of mental illness.

By the 1940s homosexuality was discussed as an aspect of psychopathic, paranoid, and schizoid personality disorders.

Having defined homosexuality as a pathology, psychiatrists and other doctors made attempts to "treat" it. James Harrison, a psychologist who produced the 1992 documentary film Changing Our Minds, notes that the medical profession viewed homosexuality with such abhorrence

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Science & Health that virtually any proposed treatment seemed defensible. Lesbians were forced to submit to hysterectomies and estrogen injections, although it became clear that neither of these had any effect on their sexual orientation. Gay men were subjected to similar abuses.

Among those who looked into the matter was the sex researcher Alfred Kinsey, whose 1948 report Sexual Behavior in the Human Male showed homosexuality to be surprisingly common across lines of family, class, and educational and geographic background. In his book Being Homosexual, the psychoanalyst Richard Isay writes: Kinsey and his co-workers for many years attempted to find patients who had been converted from homosexuality to heterosexuality during therapy, and were surprised that they could not find one whose sexual orientation had been changed. When they interviewed persons who claimed they had been homosexuals but were now functioning heterosexually, they found that all these men were simply suppressing homosexual behavior… and that they used homosexual fantasies to maintain potency when they attempted intercourse. One man claimed that, although he had once been actively homosexual, he had now "cut out all of that and don't even think of men—except when I masturbate."

Psychiatry not only consistently failed to show that homosexuality was a preference, a malleable thing, susceptible to reversal; it also consistently failed to show that homosexuality was a pathology. In 1956, in Chicago, a young psychologist named Evelyn Hooker presented a study to a meeting of the American Psychological Association. Hooker had during her training been routinely instructed in the theory of homosexuality as a pathology. A group of young gay men with whom she had become friendly however seemed to be quite healthy and well adjusted.

With homosexuality moved from the realm of psychiatric pathology into the realm of Gaylaxy | Volume 1 | Issue 3 | March 2010

normal variants on human sexual behavior, research efforts took a new turn. Psychiatry had succeeded in defining what homosexuality is not—not in explaining what it is. Questions of etiology, in this as in other psychiatric matters, thus became by default questions for n e u r o b i o l o g y. A r e h o m o s e x u a l s a n d heterosexuals biologically different? In thinking about this question, biologists have been greatly influenced by findings that involve what may be a related question: Just how, neurologically, do men differ from women?

In 1959, at the University of California at Los Angeles, the neuroendocrinologist Charles Barraclough found that if a female rat was injected shortly before or after birth with testosterone, a male sex hormone, the abnormal amount of this hormone would make the rat permanently sterile.

Further tests revealed a s t r a n g e a s y m m e t r y.

Whereas newborn male rats deprived of testosterone will, as Harris found, experience female-like ovulation, newborn female rats deprived of estrogen will continue to develop as females. In adulthood they will not seem somehow male.

Although the rats' ovaries have been removed, their brains will still produce the stimulus to ovulate. Scientists realized that without testosterone the genetic blueprint for masculinity was essentially worthless. Indeed, they learned, for a male rat's brain to become truly organized as male, the rat must be exposed to testosterone within the first five days of life. After the fifth day the masculinizing window of opportunity is closed, and the genetic male will grow up with a "female" brain.

In contrast, the brain of a female needs no estrogen for organization; left alone, it will become female.

Thus it was understood that there is more to understanding homosexuality than just psychological reactions to adverse situations. The details of further experiments and neuro anatomical evidences would consume a lot of paper.So I will come back with it in the next issue. Till then stay healthy.

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Science & Health The West Bengal Govt. may have stopped the Buladi campaign, but Buladi did inspire her cousin Bhola to step up. So through Gaylaxy, Bhola Da would give us all advise on matters of sexual health.

Hello, my brethren. This issue deals with problems related with Oral sex and how to deal with them. Let us first revise a few basics about Oral sex Oral Sex is sexual activity involving the stimulation of the genitalia by the use of the mouth, tongue, teeth or throat. Cunnilingus refers to oral sex performed on females while fellatio and irrumatio refer to oral sex performed on males. Analingus refers to oral stimulation of a person's anus. Oral stimulation of other parts of the body (as in kissing and licking) is usually not considered oral sex.

With this Gyan, let's look into some frequently asked questions about oral sex.

Question: Bhola Da, I am a bottom and

hepatitis (multiple strains), and other sexually transmitted diseases (STDs)—including HIV—can be transmitted through oral sex.

Performing unprotected oral sex on a person infected with HPV might increase the risk of oral cancer.

Question: Is there a risk of HIV post

oral sex?

Bhola Da : Risk of HIV is less(although not 0%) in case of oral sex. It is very important not to ejaculate into the partner's mouth.

Contact of body fluids can enhance the risk of HIV infection.

Question: Bhola Da, should I wear

condoms while having oral sex?

Bhola Da : Please do so if you can, prevention is better than cure. If not condoms, dental dams can be useful. Covering of sensitive areas should be the focus and the stimulation must be given to protected areas only. For those of you in the dark, dental dams are thin squares of latex rubber. Silicone versions are available for those with latex allergies.

Question: Does swallowing my

have given blow jobs to my top without any protection. Does that carry risk of infections?

Bhola Da: Oral sex is considered the safest of the methods (read low risk) of sexual intercourse. As long as your partner does not ejaculate in your mouth (and is free of any STI) it is absolutely harmless. Make sure you don't have any cuts or ulcers in your mouth.

That may worsen matters. Brushing the teeth, flossing, undergoing dental work, or eating crunchy foods such as chips relatively soon before or after giving oral sex can also increase the risk of transmission, because all of these activities can cause small scratches in the lining of the mouth. These wounds, even when they are microscopic, increase the chances of contracting STDs that can be transmitted orally under these conditions.

Such contact can also lead to more mundane infections from common bacteria and viruses found in, around, and secreted from the genital regions.

Question: What are the STDs that can

partner's ejaculate post oral sex a deterrent to my health?

Bhola Da: Not at all. Semen is known to be the best source of fructose in the world. To add to it, various salts make it a great nutrient.

Moreover, the semen will be digested by the body as any other nutrient sources. However, this comes with a rider. Semen may be conducive for the growth of numerous microorganisms. We have a huge number of bacterial colonies in our gut itself. So, better not swallow the cum. Additionally, infectious organisms might be present in the semen which may be a cause of concern. Swallowing semen also increases your risk of getting infected with HIV in case you don't know the HIV status of your partner.

Bhola Da's Tip: Remember, always practise safe sex and always wash your tool before and after the act.

be transmitted during oral sex?

Bhola Da : Chlamydia, human papillomavirus (HPV), gonorrhoea, herpes, Gaylaxy | Volume 1 | Issue 3 | March 2010

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Lifestyle

‘ Zain Awan returns with tips on Hair Care Hey guys! Welcome back to Men's Zone.

As with skin, there are various types of hair, mainly determined by their moisture content, brightness or elasticity. To choose the right products for your hair and take care of them properly, you must know your hair type (be aware, it is prone to climatic changes, health and emotional disruption and can become finer, coarser, oilier, drier, smoother, frizzier at different stages in our lives).

keep the natural pH of the hair. Also, don't comb and massage frequently. When you do massage your hair, do it from back to front, this way the oil will go to the ends. Use cold water to wash them and wipe out the excess water with a towel, letting them dry naturally.

Balanced or Normal Hair: This is the most ideal hair. It is shining, well balanced and does not dry out. To maintain this ideal condition a well balanced diet and proper care is essential.

Dry Hair:

Thick Hair:

Dry hair is the result of moisture deficiency due to chemical products abuse, aggressiveness of the environment or simply natural factor such as inheritance. Hair can be weak, fragile and opaque. If you have dry hair as a consequence of chemical products abuse, use products containing B Complex to strengthen them and give them more vitality. For styling, don't use hairspray or products containing alcohol. If you use a blow-dryer, set it at the lowest temperature to avoid loss of natural moisture.

Apply oily base creams by putting it first in your hands, rubbing it and then applying on the hair itself. Give your scalp a massage softly to stimulate blood circulation and with that increase moisture levels.

Thick Hair has a harsh texture and is very hard to control. It is recommended that you wash them three or four times a week, and use a good quality conditioner without proteins after shampooing (go for Garnier or Sunsilk, I strongly recommend these). After washing, dry them with a towel, continue drying with a blow dryer at a distance of approximately 5cm. Use a hairbrush with natural bristle and don't apply foamy creams or gels that leave your hair rigid and looking even thicker. Cut your hair regularly and apply an oil based treatment once a month, especially on the hair ends.

Thin Hair: Thin hair looks limp, lifeless, without volume and is hard to style because it falls easily. Use protein-based shampoo formulated for this type of hair; do not apply conditioner.

If besides thin, they are weak, you must use a revitalizing lotion with Vitamin B to fortify it.

Wash with hot water to stimulate the dilation of the scalp to give your hair consistency and use light foams without alcohol. Dry only the roots with the blow dryer and shape them with fingers or a hairbrush. If you require that your hair don't fall easily, apply a strong gel or

Oily Hair: Oily hair lack in volume and have a wet look due to the excessive working of the glands, which may have a genetic origin, or be caused by nervous system disorders or wrong diet. To treat such hair, wash them frequently using a normal hair shampoo, and then apply natural infusions or a special lotion (no alcohol) to reduce oil. Let them dry and wash with abundant water. Prefer natural products like lemon or vinegar to rinse them– they help to

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Lifestyle hairspray.

it damaged, dry, and dull. I recommend avoiding at-home chemical products and seek a good stylist for such services. A stylist will know how to properly prepare you hair and choose the best products for your hair type.

Curly Hair: Curly Hair tend to be rough and are wild. It is recommended that you wash them frequently using a soft shampoo; this will help you soften them. After washing, dry with a towel to eliminate excess water, comb them backwards with a thick comb. Let them dry naturally, but if you use blow dryer, keep it as far away as you can and move it constantly. Don't use a hairbrush because it destroys the natural shape; do not expose your hair to the sun without protection and retouch your haircut to give it life and stimulate growth.

Use a Good Shampoo and Conditioner A good shampoo and conditioner will help cleanse the hair, add moisture and elasticity, and smooth the cuticle to add shine.

Use the Right Tools Don't use a brush on wet hair- the hair is most vulnerable then. When combing through wet hair, use a wide-toothed comb and gently work out any tangles. Avoid heated tools such as blow dryers or irons which can dry and damage hair.

Now with enough knowledge gained to identify your hair type, let me give you some effective tips.

Stay Healthy

Pat Dry

The condition of your hair is often a reflection of the overall health of your body. Eat well, exercise, drink plenty of water, get enough sleep, and reduce stress in your life. Doing so will result in a healthier scalp and great looking hair. Living well and staying healthy will also increase the rate of hair growth.

Towel drying is one of the biggest causes of damage to men's hair. When hair is wet, it is highly susceptible to damage. When the hair is rubbed with a towel, they become tangled in the threads of the towel and get stretched to the point of breaking, causing damage to the cuticle, frizziness, and split ends. To properly towel dry, shake out the excess water and stroke your hair in the direction it grows, rather than rubbing the hair with the towel. Drying takes a bit longer this way but after a few haircuts, you'll notice the difference in the way your hair looks. Blow drying is also a common cause of damage to the hair. Excessive blow drying can dry out the hair and scalp. If you must use a blow dryer, apply a thermal styling spray or detangler to coat the hair and protect it from damage, use a wide-tooth comb to prevent pulling, and always leave the hair slightly damp. This will prevent over drying the hair

Avoid Tight Hats A tight hat (or ponytail) can cause "traction alopecia"- a condition in which hair is pulled out of the scalp. If worn long enough, the damage can become permanent. A tight hat or ponytail can also cause damage to the cuticle and breakage.

Keep it trimmed Since the only real way to remove damaged hair is to cut off the damaged section, keeping your hair trimmed regularly will help eliminate split ends. Even if you're growing your hair out, make sure to get it trimmed about every six weeks, but make it clear to your barber or stylist that you only want enough hair removed to eliminate the damage.

Cool Off Nothing feels better than a piping hot shower, but it wreaks havoc on your hair and scalp.

Very hot water strips too much of the essential oil from the hair and scalp and leads to dryness.

Reduce Frizz Low moisture and protein in the hair can cause frizz. To minimize this problem, use a good moisturizing conditioner. A slick, smoothing serum can be applied to add shine and give the hair a smoother appearance.

Avoid Chemical Treatments Coloring or perming hair repeatedly can leave

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Lifestyle

Animal Adoption Rohan Noronha tells about the benefits of keeping pets and an NGO that could help you in adopting one

D

o animals have souls? It is a question of great debate, some say yes and others no. But ask a pet lover and nine out of ten would agree that they do.

I am lucky to be born in a family of pet lovers. Since my grandmothers childhood days, our family has kept pets of various domestic species, birds, cats, dogs, squirrels, mice, guinea pigs, ponies, ducks, poultry birds, chameleons and so on. During the late eighties and the early nineties even the Alipore Zoo in Calcutta could have got a run for its money, for the little zoo my family had within our small house.

The topic here is not about how great my family is, but to create awareness on the benefits of keeping a pet. Remember, most of us gay men and women are likely to be alone and never get married, not until GAY MARRIAGES ARE LEGALISED and ACCEPTED (which doesn't seem to be happening anytime soon).

Owning a pet is like taking care of a human baby, despite the mid-night potty runs, vomit on the rug and hair coating the backseat of the family car; people love their pets. People shower their pooches with treats, attention and

in some cases, designer clothes and accessories. Non-pet loving people might wonder why people love them so much considering the sacrifice that goes along with raising a happy and well-adjusted dog. Pet lovers would probably tell you that they love their pets so much because their pet gives them so much love in return. While it is true that pets give their people unconditional love and loyalty, they also provide real health benefits to their c a r e t a k e r s .

Pet owners have lower blood pressure:: Several studies have shown that the simple act of stroking a pet can reduce blood pressure. Pet owners cope with stress better and lowered blood pressure is a result of that relationship between a pet and his human.

Pet owners have lower cholesterol levels than non-pet owners: Studies have shown that pet owners have lower cholesterol and triglycerides and are at less risk of developing heart disease or other cardiovascular problems.

In fact, studies show that pet owners overall are healthier than the general population. This can be partially explained by regular walks with the

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Lifestyle family pet Pet owners are happier in general: Pet ownership has been shown to reduce loneliness and fight depression in their owners.

When people are not lonely and depressed, they are happier.

Pets can cause happiness in humans: This is attributed to the release of endorphins in the brain, which are natural anti-depressants produced by the human body. With this increase in mental health, quality of life is increased respectively Pet owners live longer: Because pet owners cope with stress better and do not suffer from depression as often; they are more likely to live longer.

While being happy will not heal a person it can keep them from becoming ill in the first place.

Pets provide companionship, healthy relationships and become topics of conversation which aid in social interactions with others.

Pets also increase self esteem: Pets not only increase self esteem, but also cause humans to feel more compassionate toward others. All of these factors combined have a dramatically positive effect on the day to day happiness of pet owners

Pet owners have higher survival rates after serious illness: Some studies have shown that heart attack patients with pets are twice as likely to be alive one year after their heart attack than their no-pet owning peers. td. from Page 6 Now here is an anecdote from my personal life and an NGO that I stumbled upon and could be of help to you just in case you decide to adopt one for yourself.

Last December, as the whole world partied around celebrating the birth of Christ, my family and I sat beside our dearest angel Phoebe who had an untimely death on December 27th 2009. The episode was a shock to all of us and even now we have frightful memories of seeing her pass away in my arms early that morning.

After a week of research, I stumbled upon an NGO called MOTHER'S HEART in my Gaylaxy | Volume 1 | Issue 3 | March 2010

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locality. Partha Bhattacharya and his wife, a respectable young couple, run this NGO. What they do is pick up abandoned, sick , lost and needy strays dogs, cats and birds from the roads of Calcutta.

I went ahead to their NGO, expecting nothing but an angel to gift my parents. As soon as I reached the organization, I was warmly welcomed by the young couple, and was shown about the place. What I saw was a sight to remember- dogs, cats and birds of all shapes and sizes and ages (including new born critters) being well fed and looked after.

The organization has a very clean and friendly environment. My suffering heart was healing right there and then at that very moment. You have to go and feel the energy around over there, and then look into the eyes of the little friends we have.

Each face has a story untold, but they do not care because they are happy to see you come to adopt one of their own.

Oh yes! I must also tell you that Mother's Heart has a team of vet's who would be more than happy to come and inspect the pet you adopt from them free of cost, including vaccinations.

Mother's Heart is a small organization that has no government aid or celebrity endorsement. But, when you walk down the lanes of 30/1 Sarsuna Road, Behala and ask anyone for Mother's Heart, they would look at you with a big smile and almost escort you to their place.

If you would like to make a visit or a donation or better still adopt a cute homeless animal from their shelter, please go right ahead and give them a call at 09831476415 anytime between 10am to 9pm on all days.

They also have an ambulance service, which will drop the adopted animal to your doorstep.

There aren't any charges for adoption and after the necessary paper work is done, they even deliver the pet at your doorstep if requested.

Is this not a great way to help our little friends and give them a home?

Buddy has given my family and me the joy and love we thought we lost when Phoebe left us. Maybe it's in the unconditional eyes and the cute nose rubs that we find what love truly could be. Yes ! PETS DO HAVE A SOUL, only if we care to see. www.gaylaxymag.com

Personals

- Rohan Noronha

Before writing this article, I sat down to contemplate the meaning of life, because from life is when the questions of Heaven and Hell arise. Many are of the notion that when we do good, we go straight to heaven and if we do bad, we go straight to hell. Well taking that into account, I would then say that hell is overbooked and most of us would not get place to even put our toes in, so the question of me going to hell doesn't arise (BIG SMILE).

As a Christian if you accept Jesus as your savior, according to current Christian teachings, after death you will be living in heaven with Jesus and surrounded by angels. According to Roman Catholic teachings also this is true. But if you did not lead a good life, it is likely that you will end up in hell or purgatory. Purgatory is a place of temporary suffering or hell where you will be purged of your sins and purified and may be allowed to enter heaven. Hell is a place of eternal damnation where you will be condemned to suffer for eternity.

Grandma always told me one thing as a child, no matter who we pray to or where we hail from, we create Heaven or Hell right here as we are and where we stay and the people we interact with. So now that gets me thinking, 'Is Lucifer really a handsome dude who will give me everything I want if I sell my SOUL to him? Will God take me on the chariots of fire straight to Heaven and show me eternal bliss if I amend my bad deeds and be a goody two shoes for the rest of my living life here on Earth?'

Heaven and Hell are concepts which originate either from the state of mind or from the learning's we have absorbed from various sources including our families and friends. Now, with due respects and as a spiritualist following no particular organized religion, I have strong belief that yes the state of mind that we are in makes the situation of Heaven or Hell.

As with so many things in life, for every action there is a reaction. If a person is unhappy, he may do something to make him happy, for example, like drink alcohol. Feeling low, he may go to a bar, drink a lot,

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Personals

and feel happy. The next day, he pays for his happiness with a hangover. Do this on a regular basis and that unhappy person becomes an alcoholic, still in search of happiness.

Others take chemical drugs to escape their pain and unhappiness. According to a survey, today in India, more than one in every one hundred people are in jail, as many as 20 percent for drug-related issues.

Being in jail is not my idea of heaven. Some people go shopping to relieve the pain. Money is their drug. The more money they have, the more they shop.

Rather than finding heaven, they find hell, living under a mountain of credit card debt.

Another drug of choice is food. When I am unhappy, I eat. While I'm eating, I feel happy. The problem is, the more I eat, the fatter I become. The fatter I become, the unhappy I get, so I eat more, become fatter, and become even unhappier. In my attempt to reach heaven through food, I wind up in hell. Many people seek to solve their unhappiness through religion.

Many have so many problems they feel they cannot solve them, and they seek salvation by hoping God will save them from their hell here on Earth.

There is no evidence currently to support some of these views. According to esoteric tradition or Ageless Wisdom, everyone after death enters another plane or state of consciousness known as the astral plane or the astral world. It is known as the spirit world to the mediums and psychics and to the general public. After the death of the physical body, our astral-emotional body or the vehicle for our emotional feeling nature and the mind still remains.

This allows us to function on the astral plane.

Astral plane is an illusion created by the human mind and is very much like living in a dream and you create your own hell or heaven just like in a dream. It is the same plane of consciousness associated with our dreams during sleep. If you did not believe in a hell or heaven you may live a material life similar to living on earth but on the astral plane.

Reasonable standards of living will give people the time to explore their inner nature through thinking, reflecting, meditating or by engaging in a hobby or sport which may be more spiritually uplifting than the study of religious dogmas, which may create guilt and unnecessary suffering to people. This may make life a joy to majority of people than a daily chore and combined with the various scientific discoveries, will lead to the creation of kingdom of heaven on earth instead of the present hell existing in some parts of the world. Both hell and heaven are existing right here on earth.

Hence Paradise Lost or Paradise Regained? I ask you my friends to seek the answers from within. Learning is something that never stops. So go right ahead and try to find out what exactly is hidden up there or buried way below.

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From the Stonewall riots in US to the Delhi HC court judgement in 2009, we have seen gay rights make a notable change all across the world. While on one side Europe seems to be tolerant towards the LGBT community today, on the other side the Islamic countries punish gays by death which is really unfortunate.

I have read a lot on this subject in the newspapers and the internet, but wanted to verify about the plight of the community in India myself. In the last six months, I made a self styled survey meeting many people whom I got through various chat rooms or through word of mouth.

Majority of the people I met were married to women. Almost all of them are regular to the party circles and hook-ups.

They are ready to pay a hefty amount to attend these parties. While they are able to make a balance in their double life, they do not hesitate to get involved in sex outside their marriage. The big question that now arises is Gaylaxy | Volume 1 | Issue 3 | March 2010

of morality. But is the same being followed by the so called heterosexuals? Many straight married people go regularly to brothels or end up in extra marital affairs.

I deliberately initiated a topic on gay rights at my workplace but faced the ire of my fellow colleagues. They are ready to flirt with women, but tell that being gay is a western phenomenon. They say it is not for the Indians. How pathetic and ignorant!

One section of the people I surveyed has been living along with their partners for few months but they separate out owing to family or peer pressure.

While in India gays are still being subjected to harassments, we can find our neighbouring country Nepal following a more progressive trend towards the LGBT community. They are offering gay based tourism and are set to recognise gay rights soon.

Last but not the least, although a beginning has been made in India it will take long years to change the mindset of the people. Hope it happens at the earliest. www.gaylaxymag.com

Personals

My Coming Out Tale - Souvik Ghosh

I

t was the night Jojo, my cousin, lay groping me in his bedroom that I came to know for the first time that two men can actually share a bed and do things which give them pleasure other than smoking a joint and talking crap about their girlfriends. And I am, by some divine will, one of that kind. Although he wasn't a character of much importance in my life after that day, but what Jojo had inducted me into stayed with me and it was much later that I realized that he didn't make me what I am, rather showed me what I am.

I never had an official girlfriend. But while in school, there were rumors abound of me going around with different girls. It wasn't rare that an innocent new girl choosing to sit beside me would send ripples of giggles through the classroom and my cheeks, as if to catalyze that reaction, would turn rosier than those of the girl herself.

And then, it wouldn't be long before she would become another of my 'really good friends'.

For years, I was in complete denial to myself and was basking in the female attention showered on me. Guys in college never seemed to have a clue about what girls had so much to talk to me about. Their frustrations boosted the wannabe in me and made the prisoner inside me crawl deeper into the dungeons of denial. Not that I wasn't friends with guys. But, of course, guys with whom I could feel comfortable, needed to have some preferred traits – non-intimidating, non-aggressive, not interested in sports or at least doesn't give too much of a damn about it, and doesn't try to show me

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Personals pretty chicks on the streets and discuss their vital features. And, the only person who was all that, was Joy. When Joy and I had first met, we barely had enough vocabulary to know words like 'gay' and 'homosexual'. We were neighbors and went to the same school.

There was hardly anything common between us except for our lack of interest in sports and girls. But over the years, an inexplicable and inseparable bond grew between us. Then, one fine day he came and told me “Souvik, I have something to tell you which might shock you.” Well, these days a guy hearing this from his best friend is likely to have a

his gay life with me – guys he hooked up with, his gay friend circle, parties he went to and colorful gossip about handsome Tollywood actors. He was rather amazed that I never felt awkward to hear all that, instead always expressed an uncanny interest. He didn't know that in reality he was lending me a vision of the world I distantly belonged to, but still feared to step into. Meanwhile, I had fallen victim to the new invader of the human life – the internet – the most popular hideout among closeted gays.

I had registered with every known gay website, was chatting round the clock with guys across the country and soon started hooking up with the ones from my city, most of whom I never

better clue of what is coming next. But back then, in the nineties, life offered a lot more suspense.

“I am gay. I feel attracted to boys,” he finally said. If this were a masala fiction that I am writing, then at this point I would have probably jumped in delight and told him that I am gay too and then we would have immediately flung ourselves into the couch and had sex. But, reality is never as straight as fiction. I didn't know how to react. So, I kept silent.

“I knew you would be shocked. But I had to tell you, since you are my best friend,” he said.

“I am not shocked. I don't think it makes any difference to me. It doesn't change anything between us,” the prisoner in me spoke out of turn.

“Oh, Souvik! I am so relieved to hear that. I always feared that I might lose you after telling you this,” he said and gave me a tight hug, happy that he had just come out to his best friend, who he thought was straight.

In the next four years, Joy shared every bit of

saw afterwards. Joy, of course, had no idea about what his smiling, big-hearted, everunderstanding, homo-friendly straight buddy was up to.

Two more years passed by and college came to an end. I had landed a job on campus and was preparing to move out of Kolkata while Joy was about to move abroad for higher studies. All the girls who used to hang out with me were now committed to guys who had either cracked some touch competitive exam or had managed to satisfy them in ways I would never be able to.

It was the day before Joy took his flight out of Kolkata. We decided to go shopping .The busy streets of New Market are never lacking in sights that please the gay eye. As we entered City Mart, my eyes stopped on a guy in the Men's section. Before long, I realized Joy was eyeing him too. What happened next, left me dumbfounded. The guy, who was apparently busy choosing T-shirts, suddenly looked straight at Joy and winked with a smile on his face. I looked at Joy and found him smiling in return.

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Personals him for six years. More than being surprised, I guess, he was wondering about the fate which had brought us together years ago when we were kids. He finally laughed and said, “But I still don't understand why you took so long to come out to me, knowing that I am gay.”

“That's probably because it took me that long to come out to myself”, I smiled.

Three years later, while I was working in the USA, I came to India on vacation. By now I had come out to my old buddies from college and a few colleagues who mattered.

Not surprisingly, my sexual orientation made no difference to any of them. I had also made a pretty good circle of gay friends from various parts of India and abroad, many of whom were already out to their families. I knew it would take me a while to tell my parents that I am gay. But I needed to start somewhere. So finally, while on vacation, I told mom that if she had any hopes of getting me married then she better abandon them. “I don't think I am capable of satisfying a girl either emotionally or physically,” I told her. Her first response to that was rather unexpected.

“Who do you think is going to take care of you after me? You can't be alone all your life?” I had expected her to ask me to see a doctor immediately.

“Ma, I can take care of myself very well. Don't worry about that,” I said.

“Well, I can see that!” the sarcasm clear in her voice.

But that was all. She made no fuss.

She asked no questions. I found her crying to herself silently in her room later. I was a bit worried that she might fall ill. But the next day she was normal. And since that day she has never brought up the topic of marriage with me. I had myself asked her later, “Ma, are you worried about dealing with our relatives?”

“I have more important things to worry about,” she replied, “Like, you.”

I just hope that someday I would be able to put an end to her worries by telling her that there is someone to take care of me for the rest of my life. And I know I won't lack the courage to tell her that. Because I learnt one thing the day I came out to Joy. It takes the most courage to come out to yourself and not to others.

“How did you do that?” I demanded as we came out of City Mart.

“What?” asked Joy. “How did you figure him out?”

“That's the gaydar,” he grinned.

“What's a gaydar?” I was confused as a novice.

“Like radar. You send and receive signals.

Comes with a bit of experience. If you were not here, I would have probably had him today.”

“Oh! You should have gone after him. I would never mind. You know that.”

“I know. Just that, I have never actually done such a thing in front of you and am not sure whether you would be comfortable witnessing it.”

I fell silent. For the first time, Joy talking to me under the assumption that I was only an understanding straight friend was killing me. I realized that it had been six years since he had come out to me and all this while I had been hiding my truth from him.

“Joy. Have you ever wondered how it is possible for someone like me to accept the fact that his best friend is gay and continue to love him the same way?”

“Yes, I have, often. In fact, when I told my gay friends about you they too were surprised. They kept asking me – 'Are you sure he is not one of us?' to which I said 'Nonsense!

He is not gay. He is very understanding and cares a lot about me. That's why he wants to know every detail.' Souvik, I want you to meet them, so that they get to know you better. ” “May be they already do.”

“What are you saying? I know you for the past 14 years. You are not gay! Even if you were, you wouldn't feel shy to tell me, would you?”

One of my greatest weaknesses is that of not being able to cry and let my heart out through tears. Because that was exactly what I wished I could do at the moment. “You will never forgive me if I tell you what I have been hiding from you all these years,” I said, “I am nothing compared to you, Joy. You have a much stronger heart and a lot more courage than I do. ” I guess it took a while for Joy to absorb my words as he kept staring at me for a long time. His mouth remained wide open as he listened to the events of my life I had kept from

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Personals

by Sukhdeep Singh Surprised at the title of this article? Well, after the initial eyebrow raising and on second thoughts, you must have guessed what I want to convey.

Archies came up with 'it', Archies was appreciated for 'it' and Archies sold 'it' out. Yes, 'it' being the gay Valentine's Day card. There was a lot of hullabaloo surrounding the launch of the cards by Archies. It was covered by all major newspapers and dailies. As the news spread out, there was a lot of internet chatter among gay circles regarding how eagerly they were waiting to lay their hands on 'it'. The move was appreciated, and it should be. For coming from a leading Card maker in India, it had its own symbolism. It was symbolic of the fact that society is opening up and Corporate India is viewing the “gay market” (if I may put it so).

However, no sooner had the cards arrived, the euphoria died out and disappointment took over. The quality of the cards was disappointing. The new discussions now focused on how bad the cards were.

Personally or over the discussion forums, I haven't met a single queer person who would say that he/she loved the cards. Since all the mainstream media has gone hammer and tongs at appreciating the cards and reporting how fast they sold out, I thought it's time someone points out why or how Archies failed us, and through this article, give them a clearer perception of what their “actual target market” thought about the product, minus the filtering of the mainstream media.

In a single sentence- 'We loved the concept, not the product'. There were 5

different cards available, catering to gays, lesbians and another gender neutral one. Now, let's analyse them. The first one with “For my Boyfriend, From Your Boyfriend” and “For my Girlfriend, From your Girlfriend” seemed childish. It seemed like a child had scribbled something on the cards, with his yet-to-perfect handwriting. Moving on to the more graphic ones, with stick figures of two men and women holding hands and titled 'You and Me'. Could you not come up with a better way to depict love? The figures looked really dull and dumb.

Were your creative heads out on a holiday? And the worst one is yet to come- the gender neutral card. For one, I haven't been able to figure out what this outof world creature represented or depicted? Looked more of a unicorn, since it had a horn, had a face that resembled that of a donkey and seemed like a stuffed toy as a whole.

With “OH MY HOW TOTULLY GAY”, only God or Archies can explain what they wanted to portray. Do we look so alien to you?

I hope the message has gone across. We are grateful that you came with cards focused on the gay community, but when you were taking the plunge, then why play so safe?

Surely, the cards got sold because how so ever bad, they were the only ones available. The next year we do hope that you would come up with something more pleasant. Just in case the creative heads in your organization are clueless about the needs, I would like to tell you that there are enough talented persons in the gay community, just drop a line at any of the forums, and they would come up with a far superior job.

Sincerely hoping that this write-up does reach the intended people and has some effect on their future market strategies, because 'we deserve better'.

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Literature

Tout Droit -Karan Sood Premise: On a curvy lane, how can I go straight?

Five days.. two lanes.. single bridge..several thoughts..!!

If God wanted me otherwise, He would have created me otherwise.

- Johann Von Goethe

Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. - Dr Seuss

Day 3, day of discoveries: I cleared the droplets over my glasses, To appreciate the ravishing RAINBOW, Which untwist beyond my twisted lane, With pink buds carpeted on either sides.

Day 1, day of confusions: Back and forth; eroding the gray path, Every now and then, I am ready to dig and choke.

Am I probing the pent passage?

Or Am I disguising the detached door?

377; three appalling digits, yet more appalled Over the discontented desires of love and life.

Pseudonym they carry, masking the visage, To forget the pretense they largely produced.

Every passing minute bombarding a new doubt, Contradicting the history of last thirty degree count.

Since now brimming bowl can't hold more, I am ready to carry nescience out of my soul!

Day 4, discoveries continued: Following my heart, I discovered two temples, And I noticed everything, ignored by others.

The one of Konark depicted the sexual embrace of Day 2, day of decision: women, Holding hand; Momma's left and Dadaa's right, And another relief showed a monk giving fellatio to We advanced straight along the imprecise cluster. the prince.

Is it their confident glow that enlightened this lane?

Still they call it an evil from western culture, Or they just curtail the rays from things they can't And it's better to open old pages to clear explain? confusions.

To my knowledge, Kamsutra belongs to Indian Kicked by my fate, and the curve fetched me. literature, then The dryness of my throat seems fake, WHY Vatsayana devoted an entire chapter to When it drizzles over me.

Auparistaka?

Why Sufi literature expressed it a spiritual relation?

And Why Persion poetry related it with moral love?

Day 5, and my final decision: " Momma must be waiting", It alarmed my dream, Dadaa's warning notions pulled the strings.

Stepping back to those acquainted paths, A bridge revealed connecting those disparate lanes.

Before going back, I spared some calories for my new home, Confronting both roads, adjoining the invisible bridge.

Do not follow where the path may lead. Go, instead, where there is no path and leave a trail.

- Ralph Waldo Emesson

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Desires - Karan Sood

On the desk of desires, I rest or rather restrict myself between those familiar faces. I stay here, I sleep here; I, a virgin piece of paper. And I am about to begin my biography, but believe me, no one ever inked it.

I don't know who they are, but I am glad they don't recognize me, or listen to the voice of my desires. We all, whatever color we carry, are made of the same basic raw material and by the same Creator. It was He, who made us, He, who made the ink, He who will give the reason for union.

I woke up at midnight, when someone opened the door, which was locked since I am here. The only thing I recognize of that time when I was brought are a few words, “You are here, ink is here, but nothing could happen till someone switches on the light". My friends, the pile of pages between whom I stay (or I rest or I restrict myself or I sleep), call the person behind those words as "He". The cacophonous sounds of the door made us conscious. I could smell the unsullied air, but soon I felt that it's the same that has tried touching me since years, months and days. Someone (or maybe He), switched on the light, and I felt delighted and at the same time I panicked. He may recognize me. Dust, all over the desk. I thought there was only a single desk in the room, but there were many, all

sheltered with dust, all victim of darkness. I tried finding the other end of the room, but I failed. The lamps on other desks were yet off. Someone else may be assigned to their desk, someone, who may be "He" but with another name.

Soon, without uttering a single word, He picked the foremost page from the pile to which I belong. It was white, the obvious choice of purity.

But I don't know why "He" is spending so much time on cleaning to dust over this page. Might be because he is He, or might be someone who follows Him. With time, I could feel the swell in intensity overpower me. Someone is surely picking up pages. Now, they no more remain virgin. But I was curious to know, what after that? What after I lose my virginity? I was waiting for years to be filled, but when I am about to be filled, I am thinking about: what next. 'He' might know the reason that why we always desire for better tomorrow rather than a present, yet he never responds to us. Better to say- He never gives us a direct answer. What's in my destiny, what will make me absolute tonight?

A quote of joy and happiness, or a rhyme on fire and ice, Few words on curiosity, or an account of love and desire?

Every passing hour intensified the light and strengthened my excitement, but what if the ink got over while it's my turn. Do they have

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Literature

another one? The one that I want: crimson red. If, but, how, why always conquered my juvenile psyche. Someone touched me; I can't see anything else now, just the intense glow over me. From where does this lamp borrow so many glows?

And without expectations, it is sharing its warmth with me. I forget all about getting filled when I felt the elegance of the warmth. I realized what will happen when I'll be filled. When I am empty I could feel the utmost light.

The realization changed the aura, I felt like moving away from the light, yet close to it. Yes, I was right. The moment ink could touch me; I was far away from it. Blown with the wind, now I was in the air. Flying without any restriction, above the world so pleasing, like a bird I flied, cuddling with the air, kissing the light, I felt what I desired.

I knew it won't last forever, but now I desired to be in the air forever. It's not what I desire but what's in my destiny. Soon I will land up, and don't know who will fill me? Will I ever be completed? But I don't care about that, since I enjoy my present. I yet retain my virginity, and yet I experienced love.

The rains witnessed my pleasure, or my pleasure witnessed the rains. The sprinkling droplets over me made me realize that I am going to hit the earth soon. Earth? I never heard this word earlier, but it came out of me? I am wet, ready to dissolve, a crimson red drop of blood over one of my corner. Blood? I never heard this word earlier, but it came out of me? Prepared to sleep again, I was forced to lay down, no more cuddling, no more kissing. I, completely soaked with a stain. Incomplete, yet feeling complete ‌ And since you will never know why it happened to me, I am about to tell you the dark secret of my life. Dark: not because I regretted it, dark because you were not ready to switch on the light. Dark: because their always remained layers of dust around us. Dark, because so is the nature of ink. Dark: because everyone desires for the ink.

But that does not trouble me anymore, and I can freely share that I had been a virgin Pink page once. Pink, not just the color for the queer but the best. And to be the best, enlightenment is what you should desire. I am pink, I am enlightened, yet the dilemma is: Am I still virgin?

Am

l l i t s I

? n i g r i v

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A compilation of questions about life and desires, homosexuality and coming-out behind the single and most important question of love.

Directed by French director Christian Faure,

his boy friend. The unwillingness of Laurent to come out to his family creates distance between them.

Hence begins an intense portrayal of the test of the two lovers' relations as well as the parent-son relation.

Based on the theme: 'Do we really love our children as we say?,' the screenplay and script very well revolves around the basic idea, putting light on the difficulties faced by a gay child (Laurent) belonging to a conservative family on the one hand, while depicting the support of an understanding mother of a g a y son(Cedric) on the other. The work of entire cast, especially, Emma, Cedric's mom (Eva Darlan), and the off screen crew is really appreciative. All in all, the movie is worth watching!

Just a question of love is very well managed to bind you to discover the beauty of hanging questions till the last scene. The movie establishes a love story of two gay men, Cedric (Stéphan Guérin-Tillié) and Laurent (Cyrille Thouvenin), one of whom is proudly out while the other is still in closet.

Laurent, a 23-year old college student, masks his gayness from his family by living with his best friend Carole. During his agricultural research under Cedric, Laurent falls for him and wants to live openly like Cedric, but certain fears halt him from doing so. Cedric on the other hand cares for him but does not like him to live two lives. He introduces Laurent to his mom, who accepts his son as well as

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An Australian actress, best known for her roles as lawyer Nelle Porter on the television series Ally McBeal , she was married to a man from 1996 to 1999 as part of a plan to get a green card. She married talk show host and comedian Ellen DeGeneres. She is?

3

2

Colin Firth got the Bafta Award for his portrayal of a gay professor distressed over the death of his partner in this movie. We need not say anything more. The movie is?

On screen you know him as the sex-obsessed woman-dater in the popular American Series How I Met your Mother. Off screen, women aren't the ones that interest him. Ted Mosby is his best buddy in HIMYM. Like his character in the series, he is a magician himself and serves on the Board of Directors of Hollywood's Magic Castle. He is?

5

4

India's leading gay rights activist, he started Bombay Dost – India's first registered LGBT magazine in 1990. His career as a journalist began in 1974 with The Indian Express. He is also credited with starting India's first Playboy clone, Debonair. He is?

Answers:

1

A two-time Grammy Award winning English singer-songwriter, he formed the band Wham! with his school friend. His first solo album Faith was a best seller too. In 1998, he was arrested for "engaging in a lewd act" in a public toilet. He is ?

1) George Michael 2) Portia de Rossi 3) A Single Man 4) Neil Patrick Harris aka Barney Stinson 5) Ashok Row Kavi

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Let the Cards Speak The cards have spoken for you, my friends, but remember, it is not a prediction, however, it is a divination to guide you for the time to come.

Aries

- Rohan Noronha

Taurus

pril 19 March 21 - A been em to have se u yo s, e nd it has Dear Ari ns of late, a o ti o m e f o battle ttle sources. The fighting a ba ll a m o fr u ers or to yo nd your answ been coming u fo ve a h u and yo se of you is now over, 010. For tho 2 h rc a M f o end t status, will be by the employmen r u yo to r e in job, answ at a change who need an g in k o lo e b nge of would l, as in a cha some of you a rs ve re r e re you a care be, make su while others y a m it r ve Whate . Health occupation. and go forth u yo n o n e ill of gre l pressures w wear a dash very, menta co in re a ve Lo ke . ta n o bo is going to und will be a ro a re d a n ie u fr yo d r o ease, a go ned, whethe be strengthe to s d e e n e lif in all forms. ngle, love is si r o d ke o o h

Gemini

April 20 - May 20 Stop being judgmental and stubborn to have your own way all the time.

Work will be better if you learn to listen to others. An elderly person in your family has some good advice for you, it would prove beneficial in the long run. At work your boss may seem to be demanding, I would say , let him be, your talent will be recognized. Keep a deaf ear to those who speak ill of you, however, don't go into a shell. Romantic days ahead in the month of March, don't be pushy with your partner or you may loose what you earned, and if you are single, get your wild fantasies some practice because love is just about to knock knock.

Cancer

May 21 - June 20 So the last month's been great for you, now get back to work. For many of you who may have just fallen out of love or are back from a re-bound, it's time to pull up your socks and get going. Life has to move on and find new love. Stop sending those tons of messages and e-cards, your partner may not express it; however your partner feels suffocated. Work is going to go fine, only if you keep your mind at it.

Please take care of your breathing, because you may suffer from a slight attack of breathlessness now and then. A possibility of a harmonious get together at the end of March is foreseen.

June 21 - July 22

e not getting that Wonder why you ar worked hard getting what you of the promotion or not a you being victim in s lie er sw an e for? Th your little . Stop disclosing foot in the mouth tly; it is ar sm start working secrets to all and actices, pr st you share be important that g your sin lo the cost of you however, not at sibling a th . Patch up things wi ing a credibility around be op w remember, st using or a cousin. No is er u think your partn then romantic fool- if yo w no t on you, walk ou you or cheating later. regret and lament

As a born leader you would want to go your way and expect others to follow; however, that's not always the case with you. Show your inner-self and the really lovable person that you are. Work will be fun for you; you will not have a day when you would not want to make a joke or pull someone's leg at work in a playful manner, but only if you are willing to shed the hard outside for some fun and light moments. Most of you Lions have been suffering with a throat or a stomach issue for the past few days. It is advisable to get a check done at the earliest.

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Libra

Sept 23 - Oct 22 , stop d be heard n a s o g . ir e rid dear V My dear Libran, re ou for a Speak up member not to ge to take y rs o r ld e w th o e t too overworked g th th in rough the Ides Of w e o ll m a ti h d March, there are ig ly h ths an e g r n u reasons for why e s ev tr er s yt s hi r t' ng I happens in life. you You have been hade of s you for s e a iz r n yo a g ur e o se c w rushing lf of late and push re ou ing things to the ake sure y rm on Tuesdays M . s tim ie it e lim il yo b u it. It's step back and take a y fo g to a look at the uphe pink in an created in your ow s are goin g av al you in yellow or h T . h n r life. I suggest, pi You ut Marc ck up that phone and genuinely ap antic life. m througho ro r u . ol o ogize to your fa d n for y p his min mily for hurting them un-intentio settle soo ill make u na w ig lly t b b with your words u e o th d t in a r k e Si o n ng or actions. lo rt le s would find som to pa eone, although it you need at the lived g r, e in b n e m p e w p ill m a ; be shortthe ones who are Re is h hooked-sit down not what d n a re yo an ur tu d chalk out priorities, it's ne pic ver too late. At work-tell your boss you need a br moment. eak, you really ne ed it now.

Stop being so stingy, go ou t and buy your pare nts something nice, ask your part ner out on a da te , a d in n er. Wor k m ay g et ve ry demanding, w ith a new proj ect or an office co lleague mov in g to another depart ment or movin g out for good. Your mind is thinking of a switch in care er, however th e cards say wait unti l July and se e what options you ha ve.

to serious work, you Stop playing around and get you want more. You have had all the fun and yet thing. Adventure is need to fix your mind on one creating a mess for good, but not at the cost of at work is willing to others. Remember, if no one have, go ahead and help you with that idea you a prototype, and see present it to your boss with d. Most of you with a how you would be recognize find success towards creative bent of mind would NG IN THERE. the end of the month. So HA

Stop making the same mistakes again, and here I refer to the financial part of your life. You are still in a better position than you were a few months back. So stop getting emotionally black-mailed and hold tight to your wallets. Work is going to be demanding, pressure is going to be more. But if you honestly put your mind to it, nothing is impossible. Give your mom and dad a big hug, they have been worried about you lately.

Aquarian friends, get up and get going, the world changes every second and you have a plethora of ideas that need to be implemented.

Wear a lot of whites and browns to work. Make sure you complete all your assignments on time and not keep it pending, even if it is for an hour. Meet your cousins this weekend; they may have a surprise in store for you.

Dear Piscean, work hard this month and you will be working and enjoying like a king for months to come. Ask your parents for a decision on the property front, do not take it alone. Make sure you pay off what you took from a friend sometime back. A school friend you thought was angry is trying to get back to you.

Make sure you keep your eyes and ears open,and do not be scared of the change patterns, remember an upheaval of the forests yields in fertility of the soil. You shall reap the benefits.

A tip for all, starting today place a coin of any denomination in a green wooden or paper box (ONLY) and keep doing this till you reach Diwali, offer it to Goddess Lakshmi or donate it to charity and watch how you are blessed the year on.

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NGO

NGO in Focus:

SWIKRITI

Swikriti is a Bengali word meaning “acceptance” and the name of the organization itself tells it all. With their focus on creating awareness and helping out people in accepting themselves as the way they are, Swikriti's endeavour starts with self acceptance through self questioning and then to external (read social) acceptance.

A Brief History SWIKRITI was born when a bunch of close knit friends, who would often meet and discuss among themselves the problems they faced in their daily life and helped each other out, realised that they had developed a support group for themselves and could thus help out others too. Though they faced numerous legal and social challenges, the will to help out others in a similar situation conquered all the hardships. Soon, their group had people from various fields joining in and SWIKRITI was officially registered in 2003.

Activities From educating the common people on alternate sexuality to operating helplines to help the distressed to spreading awareness about HIV/AIDS and advocating safe sex practices, the gamut of its activities is huge. Still, the main activities can be classified as: Educating the masses: SWIKRITI releases its annual bilingual magazine SWIKRITI PATRIKA during the Kolkata Book Fair held in February, where it reaches out to many people. Each year a number of famous personalities too contribute in the magazine through their articles. The 7th issue of the magazine was released in the just concluded 34 th Kolkata International Book Fair 2010 and caught the attention of a larger number of people as compared to previous years. This apart, they also organize workshops for lawyers, teachers, counselors etc to sensitize them on this matter.

Meetings and Support Group: The members of the group meet on first Sunday of each month and discuss their problems and other issues and help each other out to face these problems. They also have a Parents Support Group where parents or relatives of “out” gay members meet annually and engage in a dialogue over this issue. Many parents who have difficulty in accepting the orientation of their child often find it

Gaylaxy | Volume 1 | Issue 3 | March 2010

immensely helpful in dealing with the situation.

Helpline: Swikriti also operates two helpline numbers where professional counselors provide psycho- sexual counseling. Their counselors receive calls from allover West Bengal as well as other parts of the country, at times referring the caller to a group/organization nearby while ensuring full confidentiality.

Sexual Health Awareness: The organization tries to spread awareness about HIV/AIDS and other STIs among the LGBT people. Its members/volunteers often go out on popular cruising places to advocate safe sex practices.

Pride Walk: Swikriti members not only actively participate in the Pride March held in Kolkata, but also help in organizing it.

Future Plans Considering the fact that transgendered teenagers face a lot of harassment in schools and they often opt out of studies to avoid being bullied, Swikiriti plans to raise awareness in schools over this issue by educating the teachers.

Membership Membership is open to all. However, formal membership is limited to people above 18 yrs of age by paying a nominal fee of Rs. 20 per month.

Also Associated with Swikriti is also associated with Manas Bangla- a network of various organizations working on HIV/AIDS prevention in West Bengal, Coalition for Rights Based Group (CRBG)- a group working for PLWH (People Living With HIV) and sexual minorities, and, Integrated Network for Sexual Minorities (INFOSEM)- a national organization.

Quick Info Contact Person: Rajarshi Chakrabarty, Secretary

Address: 42/57, Dum Dum Road, Kolkata 700074 Email: swikriti2003@hotmail.com, swikriti_03@yahoo.co.in Helpline No.- +91- 9831743608, 9433009190

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NGO

THE PRATYAY GENDER TRUST Contact person : Anindya Hajra Address : 293 Jodhpur Park , Calcutta, Pin 700 068 Phone : 033 2464 1893 E-mail : pratyaygendertrust@yahoo.co.in Target populations : Hijras, MSM (particularly kotis)

DURBAR MAHILA SAMANWAYA COMMITTEE Contact person : Mrinal Kanti Dutta Address : 12/5 Nilmoni Mitra Street, Kolkata West Bengal, India Phone : 033 2543 7451 / 7560, +91-33 2530 3148 Email: dmsc@durbar.org Website: http://www.durbar.org/ Target populations : Female, Male and Transgender sex workers SAATHII CALCUTTA Contact person : Pawan Dhall, Chief Coordinator Address : 229 Kalitala Main Road, Purbanchal (N), Kolkata Pin 700 064 Phone : 033 2334 7329 E-mail : saathii@yahoo.com / pawan30@yahoo.com Website : www.saathii.org Target populations : MSM in general, male sex workers, transgender people, bisexual

Sappho Contact person : Malavika Address : 11A Jogendra Gardens(South),Ground Floor, Kolkata, Pin 700 078 Phone : 033 2281 3462

Email: malvi99@hotmail.com , sappho1999@rediffmail.com Website: http://sapphokolkata.org/ Target Population : Lesbians and bisexual women

Prantik Bongaon Contact person : Niloy Basu Address : C/o Niloy Basu, Peada Para, P.O. Bongaon, Pin 743 235 Phone : 91 3251 257 029, 9332254855 E-mail : ajnil@rediffmail.com / ajnil123@rediffmail.com Target populations : Hijras, Kothis, MSM in general

Northern Black Rose Contact person : Souvik Ghosal Address : C/o Hori Roy, M. B. Mukherjee Nursing Home, Hill Cart Road, Rajani Bagan, Khudiram Palli, Silliguri 734 401 Phone : 91-9433009116 E-mail: northenblack_rose@yahoo.co.in Target populations : Hijras, Meitis, other sexual minorities,

Astitva Dakshin Contact person : Debasish Mitra Address : C/o Bablu Bajikar, Baruipur Ukilpara, Kolkata 700144 Phone : 919836185589, 9830837440 E-mail : astitvadakshin@yahoo.co.in Target populations : Hijras, Kothis

Madhya Banglar Sangram Contact person : Arunava Nath Address : Kazi Ali Aftab Vill.

Goaljan, P.O. Radharghat, P.S. Berhampore Phone: 91 9932760967, 9232694700 E-mail: sangram_06@hotmail.com

SWIKRITI Contact person : Rajarshi Chakraborty, Secretary Address : 42/57 DumDum Road, Kolkata 700074 Phone : +91 98301 82419 E-mail: swikriti2003@hotmail.com Target populations : Bisexual women, lesbians, MSM in general, transgender people

PEOPLE LIKE US (PLUS) Contact person : Agniva Lahiri Address : 254, Bonomali Bannerjee Road, Kolkata 700082, West Bengal, India Phone : 033 2402 9305 E-mail : pluskolkata@gmail.com Target populations : Support group fro young gender variants

SAATHII, Bhubaneswar Contact person : Mitali Mohanty, Address : N-6/313, Opposite Bank of Tarini Bhawan, Jayadev Vihar, Bhubaneswar, Pin 751015 Phone : 93372 72644 E-mail : saathii@yahoo.com Target populations : MSM, TG people, PLHIV and other vulnerable populations

Santi Seva Contact person : Sk. Jalaluddin Address : Santi Seva, C/o Fellowship, Tarini Bhawan, Baliorada, P.O. / Dist. Bhadrak, Orissa, Pin 756 100, India Phone : 93487 87724 E-mail : santiseva@yahoo.com Target populations : Hijra, Maichiya and other male-tofemale transgender people

Send us your feedbacks, suggestions, articles and coming out experiences to:

editor.gaylaxy@gmail.com Gaylaxy | Volume 1 | Issue 3 | March 2010

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