The College Press ————-Friday, 19th December 2014 Issue 3 Volume 10————
The Christmas Issue
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College Press Editorial Team Editors: Amy Farrell Cara Mooney Laura Hannon
Student Contributors:
John Carpenter Zoe Walsh Gemma Cox Caroline Kane Roisin King Fionn O’ Sullivan Sam Burke Hannah Egan Luke Naughton Rachel Thornton
Special Thanks To:
Mr. Doyle A: Noel (No "L")
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Editorial Hey Guys! It’s finally here. The festive season we have all been waiting for…CHRISTMAS!! The anticipation of presents is beginning to build up, the sweet smell of mince pies mingled with the taste of warm hot chocolate. We hope you have your new years resolutions in order… specifically to join College Press *hint, hint* Special Christmas shout out to John Carpenter for finally getting a move on with his article (flick to pg… to get the deets). We loved it John! Still waiting on yours Alan… We hope everyone has a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! Amy, Cara and Laura :) 3
"The Man Behind The Bowel" Student Cllr.Daniel Mcnally We took a moment out of our busy schedule to question the new face in school politics, Daniel Mcnally. But who is this "Bowel" we speak of? Who crawls out of bed just so your represented at school? It's Bowel. Who loiters the school funds in order to fund lavish city breaks? It's Bowel. Who caused havoc in the social area's bathrooms? It's Bowel. We then interviewed him with questions that held the greatest significance. Q: Bowel, would you consider yourself the reason for the golf team's recent success? A: Well it sure ain't Whelo, the f***ing boll** Q: Would you rather be chased by a horse-sized ducks or a hundred duck sized horses? A: Duck sized ducks. I like ducks. Q: What's next after student council? A:The world Q: And finally, what's your opinion on the college press? A: Wha's tha? Bowel then revealed the price of chicken rolls is due to drop to â‚Ź2.50. No further questions. By John Carpenter, with the journalist input of Alan Kelly. *The College Press does not condone thinly veiled profanity nor can we vouch for the truth of any statements made above!!! 4
Good Will The cold chill of December was heavy in the air. A full moon hung high in the sky, casting a bright silver glow down upon the tiny village. Many people would have called this night Christmas Eve, but in this remote village of the Middle East, it was a night that would have so easily melted into the next. From a gap between two buildings, a man emerged. He was dressed in American military gear and had a thick jacket covering him. He was walking back through the village to a small camp set up just on the outskirt of the village. He took a few more steps down the wide dirt road to the village exit when he stopped dead in his tracks. He had just passed another narrow road to his left. He turned his head and drew back slightly at the sight. A member of the Taliban was huddled against the side of a building. He was visibly shivering; his clothes were far too thin to keep out the cold air out. The soldier looked him up and down, seeing that he had no weapons. For a moment he considered running to the camp and alerting his superior, but the more he stared at the shivering huddle of a man, the more the impulse left him. Slowly, he approached the Talib. When he was about two feet away, the man looked up and saw him. He leaned back, when he saw a small pistol strapped to the soldier’s belt, but his eyes then flicked to the jacket he was holding out to him. “Here”, he said, crouching down and keeping eye contact with the man. “Take it”. The Talib looked from the jacked to solider and back again, his face filled with confusion. Slowly he reached up and took the jacket, fitting it around himself and zipping it up. The soldier straightened up and gave the man a small smile. The Talib huddled the jacket closer around himself and returned the smile. Both men stood looking at each-other for a few more seconds, before both turned and walked away in opposite directions. By Sam Burke
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NatMUN14 Each year, the International Relations Society in UCC hosts the Model United nations. Schools from around the country participate in 3 days of debates, called caucuses, on an array of different councils, such as the World Health Organisation, and the Human Rights Council. This year, 13 students from our school travelled to Cork to take part. Here’s a breakdown of each council and what we discussed! World Health Organisation: “Tackling Physical Inactivity” This council discussed ways to lower rates of physical inactivity in the developing and developed world. Human Rights Council: “Accountability for widespread, systematic crimes against humanity.” Delegate debated on tackling human rights violations in North Korea. Disarmament and International Security Committee: “The Role, Legitimacy and Legality of Drones (Unmanned Aerial Vehicles) in Modern Conflicts.” DISEC debated the benefits and detriments of utilising drones in combat. The Security Council: “The Conflict in the Ukraine.” This group discussed the crisis in the Ukraine and how the UN can help avoid a war. Special Political and Decolonisation Committee: “Moving towards Stability in the Central African Republic.” SPECPOL deliberated on establishing a plan to help the CAR in post-war restoration. Economic and Social Council: “Addressing Wealth Disparity: First World Profit versus Third World Exploitation” This council focused on dividing the wealth of the world, ensuring fair and safe working conditions for those in the Third World. Historical Crisis Committee: “The Irish War of Independence” This committee re-enacted the war of independence, taking on the roles of such patriots as Michael Collins and Arthur Griffith. By Hannah Egan 6
Beauty and a Beat The curtain closes on yet another successful musical in Newbridge College. Disney’s ‘Beauty and the Beast’ was this year’s production. It was clear from the beginning that this musical would certainly be one for the books. This was solely down to the cast and production team, their enthusiasm and talent shone through from the start promising a dazzling production. As you can imagine, a huge amount of preparation went into making sure the musical ran smoothly and according to plan. The cast rehearsed three nights each week, starting in September. Then, as the show approached in November, many more staff and students became involved with stage painting, costumes, props, make-up and lighting. From the moment the curtain was raised ‘till the moment it hit the ground again the whole cast sang and danced their hearts out providing a spectacular performance for the audience. I think everyone would agree with me in saying that ‘Beauty and the Beast’ has been one of the most successful and entertaining musicals ever to grace the stage in Newbridge College. Huge congratulations to all of the cast and crew involved. A special shout-out to Ms. Murphy who directed her first musical this year. She has set the standard very high for next year! No pressure Mr. Doyle! By Fionn O'Sullivan Pressure is for tyres, Fionn - Mr. Doyle 7
Anti-Bullying Ambassadors Even if the whole student body didn't notice the many brightly coloured post-it notes stuck to each and every available surface of the school building, I know for a fact that this vibrant display did not go unappreciated by the cleaning staff! This fabulous (or irritating; it depends on who you are) display was all thanks to your Anti-bullying Ambassadors. As many of you are already aware, there are ten of us who attended a training day back in October to deal with this startlingly current issue; Alex Pocock, Anna Nurse, Caitlin Breen, Elliot Davis, Joyce Delaney, Kevin Kyne, Laura Fitzgerald, Lucy Byrne, Molly Cassidy and myself. Together, we are an almighty force called to action by a man of great power; Alex Holmes, the founder of the Anti-bullying ambassadors. Our main aim is to promote a positive atmosphere in our school, and we are using these last few weeks running up to Christmas to give everyone that last push to be nice! Our next big project will be the coffee dock. Remember that little room halfway between Antonine's and Raymond's corridors in Senior House? Soon it'll be the talk of the school, as we plan to make it into a den of sorts, for any bored souls to come along and enjoy to their hearts' content! Don't forget to tweet/instagram pictures and thoughts on these happenings! More news to come on this development, but for now, be nice! #BeHappyAtNC By RoisĂn King 8
By now you should have all passed the antibullying writing display wall on Armstrong’s corridor. Don’t just glance as you stroll past though, there is fantastic and thought provoking work there … Here is just one example below...
I'm being bullied, if you must know They circled me, laughing when they dealt that first blow They followed me home, to them unseen In my opinion, it's really mean They broke my locker and stole my books See, they don't know that it really sucks To me it was torture, to them it was crack For them to blatantly start an attack They called me 'stupid', they called me a 'fool' So much so that I hated school And after all of that, you just need to say 'I'm being bullied' and it'll all be ok BY Luke Naughton 1T
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Presents for Him and Her Yes it is that time of year again and we’re all frantic about finding gifts for our family, or our friends and now on top of that we have to give extra attention to the present for him or her. This is an extremely hard decision as I think we can all agree, because if you buy a keychain for your mum she’ll still love you and make you a cup of tea whenever but, if you buy a keychain for your girlfriend…yikes. So hopefully this list will give you some ideas for that special someone.
For Him 1, a CD of his favourite band/artist 2, If you’re good at baking, get creative! The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. 3, a DVD of his favourite movie for you two to snuggle up by to. 4, How about a collage of photo’s of you two in a frame? Or just a framed photo! 5, A Christmas jumper! And make sure he wears it with pride! 6, His favourite cologne, nothings nicer than a nice smelling guy! 7, a gift card for his favourite shop! By Caroline Kane
For Her 1, Books, books and more books! 2, A bit of chocolate and a good movie never went astray! 3, Something that has a lot of meaning to both of you. 4, A Christmas jumper! Make sure it’s the right size! 5, A pretty necklace, maybe with her initial on it? A bracelet that 6, has something to do with her hob- A bies 6, A pair of earrings 7, Perfume!
҉ It’s beginning to cost a lot like Christmas ҉
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Barreststown by 3F CPSE
On the 12 of November the students of 3F CSPE class and Ms. Kelly visited Barretstown Camp, to understand and learn more about the organisation for their Junior Cert CSPE action project. Barretstown was founded by Hollywood actor Paul Newman in 1994. Their mission is to rebuild the lives of children affected by serious illness and their families. It was a very inspiring visit. Barretstown’s volunteers work hard to create a fun and carefree camp for the children with serious illnesses and their families. Firstly, the class took a tour around the camp on a train, where they saw all the facilities. There were cottages for the children to stay over during the summer, a big theatre, a wonderful arts and crafts room, a photography room, a beautiful garden, horse-riding facilities and much more. Of-course there was a medical centre that blended in to the camp, so the children can feel more comfortable and escape the hospital environment. The children and their families are brought to Barretstown and everything during their stay at Barretstown is provided for free, so the camp depends entirely on fundraisers. 3F are trying to keep these wonderful facilities and the camp running. You can help by donating and participating in our fundraiser in the coming weeks.
Zoe Walsh BELLA BORSA Imagine. What better gift could you give this Christmas than your very favourite memories to someone you care about than a handy tote bag with a fun picture on it? You don’t have to imagine it! With Bella Borsa, you can customize your own bag, or if you want a special picture put on it get us to personalize it for you! Contact Tara Ennis, Celine Dignam, Aoife Marsh or Bethany Carr in TYD for more information.
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TOP 5 ALBUMS THIS CHRISTMAS Ed Sheeran does an exciting concert. Anyone who was in the 3 Arena in October will no doubt agree. He is well known as a genuine down to earth person with his signature red messy hair and colourful tattoos. His music covers a variety of genres; pop, rock, rap and hiphop. He is somewhat unique in the sense that he is a one man band and his extensive use of loops to fill out his sound. His new album “Multiply” is different to his debut album “Plus” because of the mixed rhythms, higher pitch vocals and more upbeat tone. The world is in love with Taylor Swift. It is a hard transition to go from country music to pop, but she makes it work. The songs are catchy and fun. My favourite song is “Blank Spaces”
The artist from Bray has taken America by storm. His amazing gospel influenced voice is something no one else is doing at the moment. Easily the best Irish act currently.
The title of the album references the fours year of 1D. No longer teenagers, their sound is more mature. The songs are still good and all five members make an equal contribution to the songs. Harry no longer appears to be the star amongst the support. The three man band are back again for their fourth album. They have stuck with the same sound, but hey why change it? Who doesn’t like the script? My personal favourite is the first album, but it’s great to see them back in the charts.
By Gemma Cox
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Only A Boy He walked with his feet, he spoke with his words He saw with his eyes. He moved and he heard. He painted with paint, he played with his toys Nothing was different. He was only a boy. He could be kind, he could be mean He still slept with a teddy at age fourteen, He listened to music but he hated loud noise Nothing was different. He was only a boy. His teddy made him happy, his teachers made him sad He went home every day to a Mum and a Dad, He knew how to love and how to enjoy. Nothing was different. He was only a boy. He knew how to spell. How to play soccer. He knew how to hide a gun in his locker. He went into school. Left his bear with his toys. Nothing was different. He was only a boy. 12 boys. 10 girls. That’s 22 in all. The sirens had filled their silence in the halls. The classes were loud. He didn’t like noise. Nothing was different. He was only a boy. Each child was mourned over. Each child except one. The world lost a killer. His mom lost a son. They called him a maniac. Born to destroy. But nothing was different. He was only a boy. Dedicated to the recent Washington High School shooting. By Rachel Thornton
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Miscelleny A Politically Correct Christmas ~Anon Twas the night before Christmas and Santa's a wreck... How to live in a world that's politically correct? His workers no longer would answer to "Elves", "Vertically Challenged" they were calling themselves. And labour conditions at the North Pole, were alleged by the union, to stifle the soul. Four reindeer had vanished without much propriety, released to the wilds, by the Humane Society. And equal employment had made it quite clear, that Santa had better not use just reindeer. So Dancer and Donner, Comet and Cupid, were replaced with 4 pigs, and you know that looked stupid! The runners had been removed from his beautiful sleigh, because the ruts were deemed dangerous by the EPA, And millions of people were calling the Cops, when they heard sled noises upon their roof tops. Second-hand smoke from his pipe, had his workers quite frightened, and his fur trimmed red suit was called "unenlightened". To show you the strangeness of today's ebbs and flows, Rudolf was suing over unauthorized use of his nose. He went to Geraldo, in front of the Nation, demanding millions in over-due workers compensation. So...half of the reindeer were gone, and his wife who suddenly said she'd had enough of this life, joined a self-help group, packed and left in a whiz, demanding from now on that her title was Ms. Nothing of leather, nothing of fur...
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Which meant nothing for him or nothing for her. Nothing to aim, Nothing to shoot, Nothing that clamoured or made lots of noise . Nothing for just girls and nothing for just boys. Nothing that claimed to be gender specific, nothing that's warlike or non-pacifistic. No candy or sweets...they were bad for the tooth. Nothing that seemed to embellish upon the truth. And fairy tales...while not yet forbidden, were like Ken and Barbie, better off hidden, for they raised the hackles of those psychological, who claimed the only good gift was one ecological. No baseball, no football...someone might get hurt, besides - playing sports exposed kids to dirt. Dolls were said to be sexist and should be passĂŠ. and Nintendo would rot your entire brain away. So Santa just stood there, dishevelled and perplexed, he just couldn't figure out what to do next? He tried to be merry he tried to be gay, but you must have to admit he was having a very bad day. His sack was quite empty, it was flat on the ground, nothing fully acceptable was anywhere to be found. Something special was needed, a gift that he might, give to us all, without angering the left or the right. A gift that would satisfy - with no indecision, each group of people in every religion. Every race, every hue, everyone, everywhere...even you! So here is that gift, its price beyond worth... "May you and your loved ones enjoy peace on Earth."
Happy Christmas, enjoy yourselves during this holy and festive season and see you all in 2015, God Willing.
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Q: What Christmas song is hidden in the alphabet: "A B C D E F G H I J K M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z"? Answer on page 2!
Q. What did Adam say on the day before Christmas? A. "It's Christmas, Eve!"
Q. What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? A. Claustrophobic.
Dea r can Santa ,I e pla xin‌ .
Q: What's red, white and blue at Christmas time? A: A sad candy cane :-(
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