Mind Games

The voice in my head can be invasive and controlling. She's loud, causes me to overthink, and – at times – drags me out of the present moment and spirals me into a disillusioned mindset. I lose my sense of self and become my biggest enemy. In trying not to alienate anyone, I end up alienating myself.

July 2019, I was sitting on a massive, grassy hill at Dolores Park in San Francisco, surround by overwhelming amount of unfamiliar, joyous faces basking in the summer sun, co-existing harmoniously. It was a perfect day; the sky was blue; the air was crisp; the few clouds in the sky were plump and bright white. I observed strangers unbothered by one another. I couldn't help but appreciate the pureness of the moment with a silent mind – unusual.

Weeks earlier I heard a quote, and it’s stuck with me since:

"LIFE IS A SINGLE-PLAYER GAME"

Depressing, bitter, lonely. These were my initial thoughts. Isn’t life a game best played with others? Isn’t that the point?

Sitting in Dolores Park, in-tune with my surroundings, helped me find stability and value for these words to live in my identity. All along, I’d forgotten to take time to recognize my presence, hear myself breathe, and feel my physicality because my mind can be so overwhelmingly powerful.

Art by Will Biermann

Life is a single-player game. You only have one life to live, one body to live in, and one mind to live with. Be good to yourself because you don't get a second chance at it. Through finding stability within yourself, share yourself with others, and then bring them into your game.

Each of our minds are very mighty. They seek our attention through a variety of distractions, both good and bad, disrupting our initial focus. I find my inability to direct the voice in my mind often hinders my ability to personally grow. But, with a muted mind, I’m able to find more control over myself.

It's a difficult, healthy realization to learn to be selfish, to support yourself, and not take things so seriously and personally. Life is so unconventional, constantly leaving us with unanswered questions. And while this game might be “singleplayer,” remember that there are many others playing too.

You’re not alone, even if you feel lonely. Try to always be a better version of your current self. Your full presence matters, and don’t let your mind tell you otherwise.

Resources on Campus

Counseling and Mental Health Services on Campus:

• Let’s Talk is a drop-in opportunity to talk to a counselor to get professional guidance on any number of social and mental health topics. If you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to talk to a counselor, this is your opportunity to find out.

• Well-being Wednesdays offers students the opportunity to wind down with stress-relief activities and chat with a USC Student Health professional. Take a mid-week break to enhance your well-being!

• Thriving Thursdays present topic-specific workshops led by professional counselors that rotate on the following themes: making connections; thriving; managing anxiety; and managing moods. Bring your ideas, questions, and quandaries—and leave with skills to improve your ability to thrive.

How to Get a Therapist on Campus

• Go on the MySHR portal and create a Counseling & Mental Health appointment

• The options are:

• Solution Session: (50 mins) Meet with a counselor for a one-time session to discuss a current problem or concern. The counselor will help you clarify your problem and work with you to develop skills and strategies to create a personalized action plan.

• Initial Phone Consultation: (20 mins) If you are unsure what type of help you may need, this is a brief consultation with a counselor to discuss your initial concerns and review options and recommendations. If you have already had a phone consultation within the past 12 months, please call 213-740-9355 and ask to speak with the therapist you spoke with.

• Note: You are only allocated ten (10) sessions with a therapist on campus before they refer you to someone off campus.

By Eden Burkow