If You’re Scared of Me Now, Waite Till I’m Dead
Other books by Gene Cox Sheriff Molly The Seneschal
This novel is dedicated to Janet, the sweetest and most wonderful pizza lady on 6th Street.
Mary Ann is caring for her terminally ill father. He is her life, and she loves him dearly. Her stingy sister is married to a powerful lawyer, and has her husband devise a will which will award her the property that her father is planning on leaving to Mary Ann. When the will is read, it is found out that Mary Ann is left with nothing. She was recently fired from her job and her unemployment will run out soon. With nowhere to live, she moves into a homeless shelter. The homeless lifestyle is totally new to Mary Ann. She is taken advantage of by dope dealers and other hustlers on the street. Her son and daughter, both of which she has never understood, will no longer talk to her. She even has a horrible relationship with her mother, her only other relative. Her current life is over, and she sees no hope in starting a new one. Ann is a wine wholesaler for her father in Spain. She meets Hoot at an Infinity dealership. They fall for each other, get married, and build a new home together in Austin. One night Ann goes to a card reader on 6th Street and finds out that she cannot have kids, something that she already suspects. Hoot was a football star at U.T. Austin. Hoot’s father and grandfather were football stars there as well. Hoot’s life goal is to have a son who will be a star football player in their footsteps. When Hoot finds out that Ann cannot have kids, he surreptitiously hires one of Ann’s bride’s maids to be a surrogate mother. When Ann finds out, she feels that she has been totally betrayed and that the life she is planning is no longer feasible. She must somehow start a totally new life. Camisha has a son and a daughter. Her life is her daughter which she enjoys jogging and using the wii with. Her husband begins an affair with a rich doctor. Her husband suggests that his wife go see this doctor for her back problems. The Chiropractor wants her husband, and paralyzes her. Now she can no longer pursue the activities which are important to her like care for her kids, take care of the home, wii, or even have sex. Camisha realizes that she has been horribly betrayed by those close to her. How could they have done this to her? Her life is over. Dahn is a supervisor at Advanced Micro Devices in Austin. Due to her brilliance in the field she is the supervisor over those who have been there longer. A man that she supervises is jealous. He is also from India, and believes in the cast system, and that men should be supervisors over women. Dahn is from the lowest caste in India. He is from the highest. He manages to steal her password and sends out secret company documents to Intel while he was logged in as Dahn. AMD finds out, fires her, and prosecutes her with felony charges. With a felony conviction on her record, Dahn will never be able to find a job in her career again. She has no money saved and many bills to pay. Her life is over, and she has no idea what to do. The women, through their own circumstances, find themselves at a Card Reader’s stand on 6th Street. From listening to the readings of others, they recognize the common disasters in each others lives. Card Reader has a solution for them. They have to start over somewhere and somehow, but there are options on how this could be done. After due thought, they make a suicide pact which they carry out. If you think there is nothing more vengeful than a woman who considers herself extremely wronged, consider a woman spirit who has at her command the abilities of the spirit world and considers herself extremely wronged.
It’s show time. The men who ruined their lives and the others that were involved find out what an obsessed spirit can do. No one can live with these attacks in their lives. Somehow, they have to escape them.
If You’re Scared of Me Now, Waite Till I’m Dead A novel By Gene Cox Paper edition published November, 2012
Gene Cox Books 827 W Harwood Rd. Hurst, TX 76054 genecoxbooks.com gene@genecoxbooks.com 10 digit ISBN 148107315X
13 digit ISBN 978-1481073158 Print Edition Copyright 2012, all rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher. Printed in the United States of America
-No, I have no witness, except for one, perhaps, Ivan added with a dreamy smile. -Who is that witness? -He has a tail, your Honor, and I’m afraid you wont consider him acceptable in court. Le diable n’existe point! Don’t pay any attention, he’s nothing but an ordinary petty devil. He’s probably around here somewhere, perhaps under the table. Book XII Chapter 5 The Brothers Karamazov Fyador Dostovesky
Chapter 1 The Wedding Easter Sunday usually felt calm and serene. Maybe the season of the year, or maybe the magic imposed on this most innocent day. In Austin, Texas on this day, the weather was very pleasant, cool and crisp. At 10:00 AM, the morning sun shone a path through the windows to the altar at the front of the First Unitarian Universalist Church in North Austin. It was a path for something. And yes, something very church like was occurring, a rebirth. The interior of the church was a brittle quietness that is felt in most churches. It was so quiet that the chirping of the birds outside could be heard. The atmosphere was perfect for the marking of a new beginning, hopefully a wonderful and long lasting new beginning. There were four male ushers. They wore burnt orange three piece suites, sans jackets. The four also wore shades. Quietly, the ushers seated the arriving guests. Two worked the center aisle and one worked each of the outside isles. The scene was nearly Victorian, the guests being seated in a formal manner. From the jewelry they wore to their mannerism, they had the breeding and success to be royalty. It was the wedding of Thomas Masterson and Ann Ezquer. Due to their social status, the affair was as much a social event as it was a wedding. The ladies glittered for each other. The men noticed the other men present with small nods. An occasional cough or a clearing of the throat mingled with the bird chirps. The leader of the church, who was not really a pastor in the sense of pastors in other churches, and definitely not a preacher or priest, stood before the altar and faced the congregation. Churches had to have altars, a remnant of the days when human or animal sacrifices were necessary to appease or manipulate a god. The remained, as did their symbol of a necessary sacrifice to a god who needed nothing. The church leader was well fed, but still below the average weight for today’s American middle aged women. She did not have the diamonds the ladies she faced had, but her smile and inner peace was greater. Thomas Masterson was known as ‘Hoot’ to everyone who knew him. The use of a nick name came from older days of foot ball. Players had names such as ‘Killer’, ‘Frig’, or ‘Mountain Man’. As a quarterback, Hoot’s father took the University of Texas Longhorns to second in the nation. Hoot’s grandfather, who was also a quarterback for the University of Texas under the famous Daryl Royal, won two national championships. The Masterson family, or the males, at least, lived and breathed football. Hoot had been a wide receiver for U.T. He could have gone pro, but chose business instead. Hoot was the service manager for Austin Infinity, a car dealership a friend of his father owned. The two ushers in the center isle led Hoot’s father, grand-father, and their wives to the second isle. All eyes followed the group as did approving smiles. Success in football was a well thought of success. The family wealth was approved of as well, and Hoot’s mother frequented the social circles of the Dell’s and state legislators residing in Austin. Ann, the bride, had a nick name as well. Her family referred to her as ‘Pal’, or ‘Palito’. It was a Spanish word which translated to toothpick. It was appropriate. Ann was about five two and fine inched around. However, she had a full head of heavy black hair which hung straight down, half way down her back. From a distance she resembled a walking makeup applicator.
Ann was from Barcelona Spain, where her family had managed vineyards for centuries. Her family wealth was actually much greater than the Masterson family wealth. Ann and her sister who lived in New York ran the U.S. importing business of the family wine business. The daughters wholesaled the wine to exclusive clubs and restaurants. Ann’s sister, a prima-donna, showing her Spanish pride and bearing, was seated on the second row on the other side of the center isle from Hoot’s family. As a properly planned social event, the families were the last to be seated. The energy in the air rose with the knowledge that the wedding would soon begin. Without being noticed, the four ushers had aligned themselves at the rear of the center aisle. As planned, the tension of the coming event was allowed to build, seemingly making diamonds sparkle brighter, and leading to an explosion. Those in the know did their best to betray nothing. The upcoming secrets were their hidden Easter eggs. It sounded like a flock of pigeons suddenly taking flight, and looked like it as well. The noise caused everyone to turn and look at the entrance of the center aisle. The four ushers who had positioned themselves at the end of the isle had thrown the programs remaining in their hands into the air. Instinctively everyone watched the programs reach their highest point and start their descent to rain down on those seated in the rear of the church. The next surprise was a blast from the church’s sound system. Total quiet was transformed into the electric dance beat of Rob Zombie’s Dragula. As the song blared, the four ushers danced their way down the aisle to the front of the church. The few that attended a United Universalist Church were not that surprised. Those that attended a more conservative church were in shock. As the ushers reached the front of the church, two went left and two went right, to circle back around by way of the side isles. This drew everyone’s attention to the back of the center isle again. The two best men were hip hop dancing down the center aisle. Midway down, they parted far enough for the groom to roll down the aisle and come up in front of them dancing. He was the only one wearing a jacket. After quickly fixing his tie, he danced ahead of the two best men and the three progressed to the front of the church then circled back down the side aisles. Those attending the wedding now had a shocked glow of enjoyment on their faces. A few began to clap to the hip hop tune of Dragula. The song mentioned witches dancing. Those that attended Austin’s Central U.U. church were not surprised. The church sponsored a pagan gathering, Yew Grove, which met on new moons and chanted to the Goddesses and old Gods, the gods of nature, not the gods of men. The bride was wearing a wedding dress which would have been expected in the 60’s. The shock of its skimpiness seemed to fit. Ann and her bride’s maid next danced down the center aisle. Each held one of a towel length cloth, and danced around in circles as they made their way down the aisle. At this point, all in attendance were clapping and cheering with their eyes, smiles, and hands. As the bride and bride’s maid were circling around, the four ushers again danced their way down the aisle and positioned themselves at the front of the church. Next, the groom and best man made another pass down the center aisle and positioned themselves properly at the right side of the church leader at the altar. Finally, the brides maids danced down the center aisle, followed by the bride and husband of her sister who was standing in for her father who was in Spain and unable to attend. The bride’s timing to the front of the church was timed to the ending of the music. When the bride and bride’s maid took their place the music ended, followed by a
pose of the wedding party, a grin by the church leader, a second of silence, then approving applause by the audience. Ann was a dance major in college. She had choreographed the show and it went off perfectly. Dance is probably the most natural form of self and tribal expression. Ann taught Salsa lessons downtown Austin at the Speakeasy on Sunday nights. It was her passion. Dance was her release, her focus, her sense of pride in accomplishment, and of course great exercise. Hoot had the sunniest disposition imaginable. His face glowed. His smile was unshakeable. It was totally impossible not to smile with him in his presence. This made him perfect as a service manager for a car dealership. Without fail he soothed irate owners of malfunctioning expensive cars while his service department repaired their car. Pal was raised in a two class society. There was the rich, who owned everything, then there were the poor who slaved for them for a bare subsistence. Maids were cheap and common in the plantation houses of wealthy hacienderos. Ann had her own maid to clean her room for her, dress her, and run her errands for her all of her life. Ann was chauffeur driven to school each day when most students had no recourse except to walk. However, this upbringing did not produce laziness. She knew the feeling of power and wealth and loved it. She was shown the enjoyment it could produce then trained in its management. After college, she and her sister were sent to the states to market the wines grown on the family vineyards. Barton Creek is a natural spring centrally located in Austin. During the sweltering summer days in central Texas, one could go to this natural ice cold swimming pool and literally chill out. If you did not want to pay the small amount to enter the pool area proper, you could go to the area where the pool drained, called Barton Springs Spillway. It was a fairly wide river area with many large flat red rocks adults could lay on and kids could play on between bouts of dips in the icy cold water. Both sides of the river were thick with trees and it was a truly beautiful area, and natural beauty was common in Austin Texas. The Masterson reception was held in the spillway. The bride and groom still in wedding regalia sat on a blow-up raft and bobbed around in the spillway as caterers brought champagne and cake to them and their guests. With no effort Ann orchestrated the reception to perfection. Ann and Thomas had met at the Infinity dealership. Ann had bought a 2010 G-35 which lasted a week then started having all kinds of problems. Ann made it to the dealership and with her ruler-ship mode proceeded to resolve the problem. She was shown to Hoot’s office who instantly took a liking to the small exotic lady. Hoot was used to listening to complaints and let them go in one ear and out the other as his service department did what they were paid to do. Hoot knew all he had to do was smile and listen, which was what rich people expected others to do. He was doing it well and Pal was still complaining well when a mechanic brought the keys to the G-35 to Ann. He handed the clipboard to Hoot. -The problems were solved. They are of course covered by warranty. Shall we take a test drive? A test drive was not the normal way of ending a service issue except in the case of a repeat problem, but Hoot wanted to get to know her better. He was ... intrigued. Intrigue lead to mutual attraction which lead to six months of dating which culminated in the present wedding. The second reception was held in the bar and dance hall of the Speakeasy on Congress Avenue where Ann taught Salsa on Sunday nights. The salsa dancers were a unique and close group and everyone attended on Sunday nights when possible. Since it was Ann's wedding reception, it was packed.
The bride and groom performed the first dance for everyone who gathered around and cheered them on. Then the dancing floor was open. The wedding party still wore their wedding clothes, and many were drunk from the wonderful wine from the vineyards of Ann’s father. It was a wine quality that they were not used to having. Two of Ann's favorite students and maids of honor at her wedding insisted on dancing with Hoot. Ann of course allowed them to. Ellie Mae and Bobbie Joe were from Chattanooga Tennessee, and loved dancing more than anything. They did not know what the Salsa was when they showed up at the bar one night, but Ann quickly trained them. The two fell in love with the Salsa and attended every Sunday. Ann was amused by their hillbilly style, and enjoyed it like she would a well written novel on foreign people. Hoot had met the two girls before but knew them better at the end of the evening when the wine had led to promiscuous kissing and rubbing which everyone accepted and enjoyed. A month previously, Hoot and Pal had purchased a new home in West Austin. They would combine their two separate homes into this house then sell their old homes. After the second reception the newlyweds were chauffeur driven to their new home. There was no furniture yet, but that was another decision of theirs to make this a very unique day. As custom dictated, Hoot picked up Ann to carry her over the threshold. It was like picking up a broom, but the broom still had a very nice figure, just small. Then they realized that the door was of course locked. Hoot sat Pal down and fished out the key. The interruption gave Pal pause to consider the ancient custom. -Am I surrendering to you? She thought. -Are you rescuing me? From what, a dragon? Why can't we walk in together? Wasn't this a mutual thing? Hoot considered a different logic. -My bride. Mine. All mine, another necessary step to success. And I did a very good job of this step. -I hope I know what I am doing. I hope he knows what he is doing. Their first night legally together, for whatever that was worth. Would it be any different? Still just animals carrying on the most important biological function any animal could and would do. Nature would see to that, and no law or religion was strong enough to prevent it. But it kept the social busy bodies busy. Hoot picked Pal back up and carried her over the threshold. He whirled around and shut the door with his foot. Ten he kissed Pal who now had both arms around his neck. Hoot left the lights off. It was pitch dark, but even though he was drunk on wine, he remembered the floor plan. He carried Ann through the foyer and into the large living room. He knelt and laid the bride on the thick pile carpet. In total darkness they began a new life like a baby begins in the womb. Pal considered the darkness, but Hoot did not. Slowly, lips and fingertips; searching, unzipping, unsnapping, grasping, caressing and kissing of the lower layers of clothing progressed to the sensitive and responsive skin beneath them. Pal and Hoot allowed the passion to be fully unleashed and run wild without rein until the probing rays of dawn intruded into their private union. It embodied the couple’s new creation. Instinctively, Ann spread her legs again, but her heart was firmly closed.
Chapter 2 The Masterson's New Home -U.T. is going to have a great team this year, Hoot said, his face its perpetual glow. Hoot was wearing a burnt orange t-shirt with a white longhorn emblem over the left breast. When not at work he always wore a UT emblem somewhere on his person. Pal was bringing dishes to the table. Even though she was raised in an ocean of servants, she did not mind working. Home life, even for the rich, was different in the U.S. than it was in Spain and some other countries. Hoot seated himself and waited for Pal to finish. Chorizo e arroz as usual. Hoot did not mind the main course. Pal could prepare Chorizo e arroz a hundred different ways. Broccoli and cauliflower was also on the table making it a healthy meal, and a bottle of red wine from her father’s vineyards topped it off. As she seated herself, a smirk came across Pal’s face. -Football is such a faggy sport. -What? -Well, it is. -How can you say that? -Just the facts. Now, pretend you know nothing about football, and ask me how it is played. First, I would like to state what for me is the main event that occurs at the start of each play. A man places his hands between another man’s legs and asks to be handed a ball. Am I right so far? -It’s not like that. Where are the quarterback’s hands? -Well … -And what other sport brags about having tight ends? -It’s not that they have tight ends, they are tight ends. -At least they are not in the closet. And I hear you talk about full backs. Wow! Look at that back on that player! -Go ahead, have your fun. They were both enjoying the conversation. -I keep expecting you to start wearing pink clothes. -Funny. -And about that slap on the butt. Explain that. No, don’t explain that. I am a woman. I have been slapped on the butt before, and I knew what it meant. Their smiles lasted throughout supper. Hoot wiped the corners of his mouth with his napkin and placed it on the table. Then he stood and turned for the den. -I am going to check the scores. -Still going down town tonight? -Sure. Call me when you are ready. Pal stood and smiled in answer, then began clearing the table. In the den there were three LCD TVs. If three football games were being played on the planet, they would be on those three TVs. Above the TVs was a shelf with four expensively framed pictures. The first picture was of his grandfather playing for U.T. The second picture was of his father playing for U.T. The third was of him catching a pass to win a game for U.T. The fourth picture was blank. It was for his son’s picture when he would play for U.T.
Before dressing, Pal went to her haven. The basement was her realm. A garage at ground level contained thousands of cases of wine from Spain. In the basement two rooms contained cases of their older wines. Another room was her office. Pal sat before her desk and began checking emails. She was still adjusting to the new residence. I sold my wonderful house on Lake Travis for this. She remembered her back dock and living room windows which looked out over the large lake. Her mind was still considering the change. I gave my body to a man. No, I didn’t give it to him. I gave him permission to pursue his male lusts on it. Hoot was her second male, and she was sure her last. Not that she was gay. She was not. She valued her body and did not consider it a light matter for another person to touch it, much less partake in its intimate places. I am sharing my life with you. I am very successful on my own. I do not NEED a man for money. I even gave my cat away that I loved very much because you were allergic to cats. I even let him carry me over the threshold. Palito answered her emails. Some in Spanish, and others in English, then she considered how their lives would meld together. She had not told him that she felt that she would not be able to have kids. She felt that that should not affect their relationship.
Chapter 3 The Mating Game Pal was in her office at her computer. -Hmmm. I wonder what a pro football player looks like when he is young. I know, I will find a baby picture of Hoot and try to find a baby up for adoption who looks like him. Excellent! Since Hoot was in the den watching basketball games, Pal was able to go to their bedroom and find a baby picture of Hoot in his photo albums. Then she returned to her office in the basement to work with Google and find a baby to adopt that would satisfy Hoot. -Family background must have a lot to do with the success of the child. It must be a combination of genetics and upbringing. Unfortunately, that information is hidden from me. But would a wealthy family put a child up for adoption? I have never heard of it. Only unwed street tramps, hookers, drug users, and maybe illegitimate babies made it to the adoption scene. That thought put a damper on her searche. After shaking her head, she snapped out of it. -Ok, think football player. Hoot was in the den watching basketball games since there were no football games this time of year. Hoot could not help but notice the four frames above the three TVs. Especially the empty frame. Hoot got up to examine it closer. As he moved to the front of the den, he noticed a poem in a frame that his father had given him. He had based his life on this poem and walked over and read it. If you think you are beaten you are, If you think you dare not, you don’t. If you would like to win but think you can’t, It’s almost a cinch you won’t. Life's battles are not always won by the faster Or stronger man. But sooner or later the man who wins Is the man who thinks he can. -Of course. Of course! Hoot walked over to the empty frame. -Yes, I can. How dare I lose hope! Granddad would disown me! While Hoot was giving himself a pep talk in the den, Palito was printing out baby pictures. She would let Hoot choose. -Ok. There are two ways to get a man in a good mood. We already ate, so sex is it. A wardrobe change, a little more makeup, a little special perfume, a little pep talk to her body to do what it was designed to do, and with pictures in a manila folder in one hand, took the elevator to the main floor. Not that she and Hoot were too busy to use stairs, but moving around cases of wine required an elevator. Pal swept into the den. Hoot heard her and turned from studying the blank frame. He knew without a doubt what was fixing to happen. He did not know why, but he knew what. And he was as powerless to stop it as he was preventing the sun from going down, which it was.
Afterwards, they prepared to go down town. Sunday nights Pal taught Salsa lessons in a restaurant bar on Congress Avenue. After sex, Pal had shown Hoot the baby pictures, doing her best to be very excited about the whole situation. She felt Hoot was just humoring her as he studied the baby boys and seemed to ponder their potential. -Well, we can decide this later. I will be late for my class. This was where that subject left off as they dressed and proceeded downtown. Pal felt she was making progress. -While you are teaching, I am going to walk around a little. I will be back in an hour or two. -Ok. Pal went in the club and Hoot walked north to 6th Street then east through the bar district. Sunday was a very slow night for bars. However, after eleven PM, it did pick up a little. Maybe people who could not sleep. But Hoot was not in search of a bar. He walked to 418 East 6th Street, beside Cheers Shot Bar. The card reader seemed to recognize him from two nights before. The card reader did not have a customer, and rose to shake Hoots hand as he approached. -You read my wife's palm Friday night. -Ahem, yes, the Spanish lady. -Yes. -Well, what did she think of my reading? -She said everything was accurate. -That is what I am paid to do. -How long have you been doing this? -Oh, probably about twenty two years. I have been doing it forever it seems. -How did you get into this occupation? -Well, I was a computer programmer for Pacific Telephone. I was living and working in Dallas, doing data base conversions for them. One mardi gras I was drunk on Bourbon Street. Can you imagine that? -Yeah, I can imagine that. -Life presents opportunity when it decides to, and you can take them or leave them. I was not happy as a computer programmer because computers are so impersonal. I like being a psychic. It is a very people person job. -I can imagine. Ahem, hey. You read my wife's palm for how many kids she was going to have. Does that work on men too? -Yes and no. A woman knows when she has had a baby. But a man may or may not know. That affects the reading to some extent. -Would you take a look at mine? -Sure. Are you right or left handed? -Right. -Was that all you wanted to know, or did you want a full reading? -I will get a full reading later. Now I just want the answer to that question. I will pay for it. -Ok, may I see? -Most palmists look for kids below the little finger. I find I can be more accurate by reading the web between the thumb and index finger. That is the family area of the palm. Look at yours. One clear deep line goes straight all the way through, definitely a boy. -Are you sure?
-I have read a million palms. I am rarely wrong. Hoot studied the card reader. He radiated confidence and knowledge. -That is what I wanted to know. Thank you. Hoot pulled a hundred out of his walled and handed it to the card reader, and walked back to the Speakeasy. Pal was giving Salsa lessons to a group of about a dozen people on the dance floor of the club. Everyone else was drinking, mingling, and watching the dance class. Everyone's primary reason for being there on Sunday nights was to Salsa. When the lessons were over, which would be soon, everyone would be dancing. It was practically the only thing happening in the Warehouse District on Sunday nights. The Warehouse District was the upper-scale clubs and restaurants in downtown Austin. It drew the wealthier and older crowd. Everyone else went the clubs on 6th street. Hoot saw Ellie Mae standing by the bar with a drink in her hand. She was smiling. Hoot knew that her and her roommate Bobbie Joe were hillbillies. Talking to her sounded like a good way to pass the time while his wife was instructing dance. As he walked to the bar a devious plan sparked in the back of his mind. -Howdy Hoot. -Ellie Mae -Can ya buy a gal a drink? -Sure. Hoot motioned at the bartender. -How's married life Hoot? -Ok. Ok. But, like everything in life, there are always problems. Ellie Mae sipped on the straw on her drink. One arm was on the bar. Her body swayed back and forth in front of it. To Hoot, she looked like a young, innocent, and not so smart young lady. Ellie Mae glowed with happiness. That was her greatest attraction. -Well, how is UN-married life? -Well, like you said, there are always problems in life. I guess everyone has their own. -I guess. -Tell me yours, and I will tell you mine, she teased. -This could be very dangerous, Hoot thought. It could be deadly in fact. He looked back at Ellie Mae. Her smile told him everything was going to be alright. -Well, I found out Ann can't have kids. And I desperately want a son. -I see. Ellie Mae was still sucking on the straw in her drink and her body started swaying even more. In a way, Hoot saw a flower opening in front of him. Ellie Maw was grinning ear to ear. -Well, there are adoptions, Ellie Mae said, looking down. -But I want him to be my son. -I see. She looked back up at Hoot. -And what is your problem? -Well, I am between jobs now. I am past due on my rent and all my bills. It really is a big problem for me. -I see. And I could use a new car. You sell those, don't you? She laughed and swayed even more. Her knee brushed across Hoots thigh. -Well, I am the service manager but I suppose we all sell cars there. That is what we do.
Ellie Mae accidentally on purpose stumbled, bumping into Hoot, brushing her body against his, allowing him to smell her and feel her aura, all the while feigning innocence. She knew that Hoot was as wealthy as she was poor. They wouldn’t miss a little dough. And she could make excused to stay away from Ann for nine months. -Well, life is about helping each other out, she said, still swaying, and looking down. -That's how you accomplish things, helping each other out. Before they left the bar, Hoot had her cell phone number.
Chapter 4 The Shiva Chip Advanced Micro Devices AMD. Chip design facility 5201 E. Ben White Blvd., Austin, Texas May 17, 2010 -What do you think those are? -Pretty sure pre-caching registers. -Leading to the ALU. -One section of. -I still think the trick that Intel is using is in the micro-code. -Probably, but Dahn is convinced the speed gains are being implemented in hardware as well. Bikram and Cindy sat before the large screens of two Spark V terminals. They were on the team to find out what Intel was accomplishing with the I-5 and I-7 microprocessors. If the gains could be found, they would be considered for inclusion in the next generation AMD processors, code named Shiva, at this point. Shiva, the Hindu god of death was a reference to killing their arch rival, Intel. Bikram felt and smelled Dahn walk behind him. He could tell when another Indian was around. They had a distinct smell from the food they ate, and if you were sensitive to energy fields, Indians had a unique energy field which could be felt as well. -I think this row of pre-caching registers is significant, Bikram said without looking around. -Yes, but there is a lot more going on than that. Keep looking. -Will do. Everyone knew Bikram said that through clenched teeth, but they had learned to live with it. Bikram had been with AMD for eight years but Dahn only one. And she was the team supervisor. Some might not resent this issue, but Bikram did. Cindy was a recent graduate from U.T. with a master’s degree in computer engineering. For her, this was a job, a pay check. She did what she had to for her to accomplish that. She could care less who was in charge as long as she got her pay check twice a month. Bikram was not only a male but from a higher caste than Dahn. Actually, she was from the lowest caste in Indian culture. That did not mean as much as it once did, but it still mattered to some. Dahn grew up in the poorest conditions but proved to be intellectually gifted, which led to her scholarship at U.T. Austin, and she graduated at the top of her class with a masters in Computer Engineering. Shortly after joining AMD her talents were recognized and she was promoted to team leader. Bikram drew a yin and yang symbol on the notepad before him. -Is that an Indian thing? -Actually no, it is ancient Chinese. It predated King Wen, who is credited with developing the I-Ching. As with most things, it is misunderstood. -Male and female, is it not?
-When concepts are introduced, the first explanations are very simple. As one develops in these issue the simple explanation leads to an understanding. This understanding can be taken to deeper and deeper levels as desired. -To a young child, why am I getting these presents is first explained as Santa Claus. Magic was a quick and easy explanation to someone who would believe anything. As the child grew older, the simple explanation gives way to a better understanding. -When a child asks, who created the world, he is told that God, a magical being created it. When he grows older, and if he develops and desires spiritual wisdom, he will develop a better understanding of the complex issues of life. -Yin and yang actually mean sunlight and shade. It refers to the sun shining on a mountain. One side is shady while the sun shines on the other side. Yet it is the same mountain. Unity is perceived as duality is a better explanation than the representation of male and female. -You were taught this in your schools? -Schools in India have changed a lot. Before the Mahabharata was taught, now it is Economics. But true knowledge comes from within. Only those who seriously practice meditation know this. You can have ten people who know nothing about life or anything else. Place them on the top of ten mountains and have them do nothing but meditate for several years. At the end of those years, they will be wise in the ways of the world, and if they compared notes, the notes would be the same. This is called jnana yoga. It is one type of yoga in the philosophy of Yoga, self knowledge. -In the Upanishads it is said: But he who understands The wisdom of self knowledge, Jnana Yoga. And the wisdom of actions, Karma Yoga. And the wisdom of surrender, Bhakti yoga. Overcomes even death, And with this understanding. And reaches the level beyond time into immortality. -But you have many gods, don’t you? -That is another thing where you understanding grows depending on your spiritual maturity. Brahma is the Generator. Vishnu is the Organizer. Shiva is the Destroyer. They are three aspects of GOD. But they are all Brahman. This leads to the understanding that everything is Brahman. In Hindi, sarvam halvidam Brahman. You are little pieces of Brahman, of life, as am I, as are others. That is why if you hate or harm others, you are only hating or harming yourself. Meditation leads intellectually to this understanding. It is very basic, the unity of everything. The tremendous benefits of this understanding are that you lose fear and desire, the true sources of turmoil in your life, this being easily solved with one philosophical thought. -In the Upanishads: Who sees “all being� In his or her own self As consciousness, awareness, Like his own Self, Never suffers from fear.
-Do you believe in reincarnation? -It is another topic where your understanding starts simply then expands with your understanding. Let’s take the concept of karma. People may think that you are rewarded with the way you treat others, a reward for your actions. But a better understanding is that you choose that mode of life and thus live that life. You cannot live one life and have another. There is nothing magical or god given or rewarded here. It is simply your choice for your life. -Reincarnation, life continues in cycles. This is very easy to see with the seasons and flowers and trees. Then the lives of animals continue through their young. Many people admit I feel I was such and such, in a past life. Many people also feel they have a mission in this life. -Having a mission would not make sense if they were not a part of the growth of the whole. A part of Brahman. Aham Brahmasmi. I am Brahman. -This is one thing that amazes me about your country. All religions except Buddhism teach of a spiritual world. The Christian Bible and the Moslem Koran are filled with talk of spiritual beings, angels and demons and dead people. It is spoken of as a matter of fact. What is interesting is that nearly every American professes to be Christian, which means that they accept their holy book the Bible, as being totally factual. Yet if you ask if they believe in spirits, most will say no or I don’t know. How can you reconcile this? -It doesn’t make sense, does it? -Most people talk without thinking. They were taught to say they are Christian, but never took the time, or have the ability to accept, understand, and follow what that means. If they truly accepted the religion they would say of course! Spirits surround us, thick as flies. The Bible says so. -Another thing. I have been to funerals where there is a feeling. A feeling as strong as the sun shining on your face, that there is a deceased person present. I have been to funerals where everyone looked at each other like holy shit, should we run? There was no doubt to this presence. Even Buddhism, the supposed atheistic religion, teaches of a spirit world, of both good and bad beings, but Buddhism says that this topic does not matter, and not to get sidetracked on such matters. Deal with your life here and now. -So you believe in spirits? -Well, I would not say that I believe. I would say that I know. What about you? -I guess. -Are you a Christian? -Yes, of course. -Of course? Have you read the Bible? It is full of spirits, they surround us. -Yah, you’re right. -Then what is religion for? -More often than not, a cover story for scams and scammers. -You should ponder such things in quiet, long, meditation, to gain an understanding of such things. It would lead to a richer understanding and appreciation of the life you are now living. -I am sure you are right. -The topic is re-engineered. Not re-incarnation, a voice behind them said. -Of course, Dahn, Bikram said. We are reincarnating the Intel I-7 as the AMD Shiva chip. -If so, why am I not seeing design notes floating across my computer screens? -It is still in the gestation states, great Brahman.
-If so, then give birth, great Brahman. I need something on paper I can take to meetings with me. With a sigh, Dahn returned to her cubicle. Everyone was breaking for lunch, everyone but her. As usual she would work through her lunch hour, picking up the slack for her team members. Her job was to get things done. She had not found the leadership thing out yet. So until she did, she had the technical savy to get the job done, and she would use that to produce results for her team. Management wanted results, by hook or crook. Results led to money. And money was the reason for the existence of a business. To have other goals meant it was not a business, which was why governments could never have a workable business. Dahn pulled up a greatly magnified image of Intel I-7 processor. In another window were her notes. In another window was the notes from a spy AMD had working at Intel. The job paid more than a regular engineer made, but it took a special engineer. Only top management types knew of the existence of spies. -Shavasyam Idam Sarvam, Dahn said, and went to work.