Issue no. 4
summer 2020
ST O R I E S / I N S P I R AT I O N
G E N E R AT I O N MAGAZINE
stories & inspiration for the generation.
G E N E R AT I O N MAGAZINE
olivia walls Editor-in-chief @livvwalls host: https://issuu.com/generation-mag submissions: genmagpublication@gmail.com
Generation Magazine extends a heartfelt ‘thank you’ to our
CONTRIBUTORS Ashley Maiso Rebecca Morales contributing photographers: Janelle Rivera Fernando Garcia
follow along on @generationmag_
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CONTENTS 06
EDITOR’S LETTER
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THE COLORS OF SUMMER
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ON THE COVER
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HOPE DEFERRED
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HAD IT NOT BEEN FOR LOVE
FROM THE EDITOR Olivia Walls
I
don’t think anyone anticipated the kind of year 2020 has become. If you’re like me, you probably had the expectation that 2020 would be a significant year. However, it’s been significant in the most surprising way. Portrait by Fernando Garcia
In short, this year has been revealing. It has revealed the hearts and minds of many people that we call friends, family, acquaintances and the like. Most importantly, it has revealed our own hearts. In preparing for this issue, it was pre-determined for the theme to be on ‘hope’. Hope for today and for tomorrow. Hope for real change, hope for those who mourn, hope for justice, and hope for a future in which all people are treated with God-given dignity. I think that’s something our generation needs to hold to and work passionately toward. It’s a long road ahead—more like a journey. Moreoever, it’s not a journey to be walked alone. We need eachother on this journey that must be rooted in love first and foremost. As we walk together in love, we must listen intently to the voices who deserve to be fully heard. And as we listen we must unlearn, then learn again with a new perspective and open hearts. That’s a journey that I am wholeheartly willing to walk on. I pray this issue at the very least ignites hope in your own heart. I like to think that hope is what keeps the heart beating. From us at Gen Mag, thank you for reading.
Livv
with love,
G E N E R AT I O N
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BLACK LIVES MATTER.
LISTEN . EDUCATE . SPEAK OUT AGAINST RACISM 7
the colors of summer One of my absolute favorite things to do for the magazine is picking out the color palette. It’s just fun! I spend months scowering Pinterest, pinning all my favorite swatches to ultimately choose a palette that fits the unique voice of each edition. Every color is carefully chosen and has a purpose. I truly love the summer palette for this issue—it inspires me to be creative, spontaneous, and bold. What do these colors speak to you? It’s my hope that they invite you to a summer that’s full of life in living color. — Livv
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on the cover
Photo taken by:
Janelle Rivera Photographer | J.J. Au’Clair
location: skolepos
@jjauclair G E N E R AT I O N
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HOP
DEF
G E N E R AT I O N
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PE
FERRED words & photography by Ashley Maisonet
“Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.” (Proverbs 13:12) I’ve heard my pastor quote this verse in his messages more times than I can count in this last year and somehow it’s only begun to resonate with my soul in the last few weeks. It’s funny how things seem to make more sense when you’re coming out on the other side of something. Hindsight 20-20, is it? The thing I love about hope is that it’s irrespective of religion, race, culture, societal status, and environment. Every living being has the opportunity to hold on to this invisible lifeline and no one can rob you of your longings and your desire to see them through.
What do we do while we wait for our hopes to be fulfilled? How do we care for our souls and nurture our hearts so that the “waiting” doesn’t sicken us? What will it look like when our longings are finally fulfilled? I think I’ve asked myself these questions in different ways for the past two years. There’s tension in the “meanwhile”. There’s a fight to stay present and fruitful while attempting to keep your faith alive for the things not yet seen. I learned a few things along the way that I intend on implementing in my next hopeful wait. Part of me feels like there’s no way to fully avoid our hearts from getting ‘‘sick’’; sickness creates need for a Healer. It’s what we acknowledge and do about our sickness that makes the difference. I have to be transparent with you, reader, if I expect you to trust that my experience gave me some sort of knowledge and wisdom for the future. So, here is some unsolicited advice...
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In my times of waiting, I have found that there’s always something greater behind the scenes that need my attention. Most recently, God used my “sick waiting heart” to show me places of distrust, discontentment and a mindset of defeat. Sure, there were natural responses in play as I awaited the things I yearned for to come alive, but He used my waiting to show me that I was making myself even more sick by not tending to some underlying issues. It wasn’t just affecting my health, it was stifling my growth. “…but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life”—I don’t believe that we magically spring up with life when our desires our fulfilled. I’ve seen many people sit in disappointment even while obtaining the things they desired most. That’s because a “tree of life” only flourishes from healthy root systems buried in hidden places—
those healthy roots represent your character, faithfulness, values, integrity, your dependency on God and your obedience throughout the journey. And what if there are roots that are not-sohealthy? If we examine the parallel between botany and human life, it’s clear that there is an entire process of its own to recover from rotting roots.
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What am I saying with all of this? I’m proposing to you that your time of waiting with prolonged hopes was never made for you to lay in bed withering away in misery. The sickness of your heart allows for a greater opportunity to find healing and health while your roots strengthen and bury themselves deep into the ground.
Whatever you’re hoping for, trust that your journey to a “longing fulfilled” has more to offer your internal world than you realize.
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If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that we all have a choice to either nourish our faith or starve it. Friend, if you’ve lost faith along the way, do everything in your power to stir it up again. Find people who believe with you even on the days you don’t. Allow your heart to be examined. Find those “weeds” that need to be removed and yank them out completely. Embrace the process and allow yourself to be better for it.
What will you do with what you have when it’s not what you want? Build and prepare. Dig and sow. Water and wait. When hope finally triumphs and your longings are fulfilled, you’ll find that the road behind you equipped you with the capacity to receive and sustain the things you’ve yearned for. Stay hopeful. Don’t lose faith along the way. There’s more hope on the other side of your endurance.
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Had it not been for
Love.
words by Rebecca Morales G E N E R AT I O N
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F
rom the moment I took my first breath life was determined to make me believe that I would live a life without hope. Born in rejection, unloved and unwanted, the woman who birthed me didn’t see me worth fighting for. Missed visitations, empty conversations —was she ever really there? Her first born, but not her last. One of six, four remained in her care and yet, her first was so easy to let go? Little did she know that the seed she planted would be carried with me forever, or at least I thought so. I wasn’t good enough. Though just an innocent bystander, yet still paying the price. Given up, left to myself with the thoughts that would haunt me later on.. ‘‘does anyone even really want me?’’ It was a journey, to say the least, but I slowly learned the truth along the way. You see, hope arised, it came in disguise and little did I know I was brought to the one who God had for me all along. The one who could give me Love, void of any condition. The one who fought hard for me, never gave up on me even when I made her life a mission. Through my rebellion and pain, my aching heart could not see it then, that she would be the one to save me.
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I carried shame, walked with anger clenched in my fist because of the cards life had dealt me. Yet, hope came in little pieces, like shattered glass after you’ve swept it away; you still find those hidden pieces under the crevices. And when life would hit me hard once again, hope was just around the corner waiting to be seen. It was up to me, whether or not I would allow those situations to make or break me. Would I allow those things to hold me down and cripple me into believing that this was all I would ever get? Or would I get back up, dust it off and try again?
When I cried tears no one else saw, I chose hope. When I was so tired of the pain and wanted to give up everything, someway, somehow I still clung to hope. Whether consciously or unconsciously, I chose hope again and again but in reality, Hope chose me. I wasn’t just brought to this earth to struggle in my pain. No, I was brought into the world
To make a difference To share my voice To share my story with those who can’t see even the tiniest bit of hope in their situation. To encourage the rejected, the lonely, the unloveable, the unseen... I, too, have been all of those things. To speak words of life and love because I, too, have experienced the power that words yield.
You see, life was determined to try and make me believe that I would live a life without hope. It was determined to make me believe there was no purpose for the pain It was determined to make me believe Truthfully, had it not been for love that no one could ever truly love me. It was determined to try every single day I wouldn’t be here today. Love was the very thing that saved me. to make me feel unworthy. Love was my constant reminder that hope is always waiting Even when it hurt like hell around the corner. I found myself searching for those little pieces of hope once again. Love taught me that through it all, I must choose hope over the pain On the darkest of days, because Hope is always choosing me. when I couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, I chose hope. 23
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