Volume 30 Issue 2 by Generation Magazine

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GENERATION MAGAZINE

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Crossing Streams

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CONTENTS

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EIC Letter A Letter from the Editor Agenda, Hit/BS David Brooks at UB! Sometimes You Can’t Make Exceptions Pro-life Fall Video Game Preview Mormons In Defense of Mormons Convention Comparison Observing Our Government Puerto Rican festival pictures He Said/She Said What is good urinal etiquette? Terror in Theater 9 Who’s to blame? Chicken Wings The best wings in Buffalo Havoc and Bright Light’s Review Upcoming Concerts Short Story Poetry Poetry from fellow UB students Parting Shots Silly Voters... Punch Drunk Love

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Cover designed by Emily Butler Melissa Osterweil, photo source from http://willblogforfood.typepad.com/, all credits goes to respective photographer. Generation Magazine is owned by Sub-Board I, Inc., the student service corporation at the State University of New York at Buffalo. The Sub-Board I, Inc. Board of Directors grants editorial autonomy to the editorial board of Generation. Sub-Board I, Inc. (the publisher) provides funding through mandatory student activity fees and is in no way responsible for the editorial content, editorial structure or editorial policy of the magazine. Editorial and business offices for Generation are located in Suite 315 in the Student Union on North Campus. The telephone numbers are (716) 645-6131 or (716) 645-2674 (FAX). Address mail c/o Room 315 Student Union University at Buffalo, Amherst, NY 14260. Submissions to Generation Magazine should be e-mailed to ubgeneration@gmail.com by 1p.m. Tuesday, a week before each issue’s publication. This publication and its contents are the property of the students of the State University of New York at Buffalo 2011 by Generation Magazine, all rights reserved. The first 10 copies of Generation Magazine are free. Each additional copy must be approved by the editor in chief. Requests for reprints should be directed to the editor in chief. Generation Magazine neither endorses nor takes responsibility for any claims made by our advertisers. Press run 5,000. ≠≠≠

A Letter From the Editor Earlier this week I received a Facebook invite from my friend Chris to join a Tough Mudder team. For those of you who haven’t heard of Tough Mudder, it is basically an obstacle course that beats you up and benefits the Wounded Warrior Project. There are two types of reactions when people first watch a Tough Mudder clip: those that think anyone who signs up is insane, and those who are crazy enough to want to swim in freezing cold water and climb an oily half pipe. I fall into the latter category, but still hesitated to click join when the event popped up on my phone. Preparing for a Tough Mudder takes months of dedication and hard work if you’re going to do it properly. With the Buffalo Mudder being almost a year away, do I have the discipline to actually stick to a training plan? Honestly, I really don’t know. But I do know that I work better with a goal and a deadline. So far this school year I have gone to the gym once, and knowing me, if I’m not training for something, I won’t go again until October. (When it gets to the point in the semester where I need to do something other than schoolwork or I’ll go insane.) Don’t get me wrong, physical fitness is important, that’s a given. People warn you about the Freshman 15 before you go off to college, but they forget to tell you that it’s easy to gain weight at any point in your schooling. Even having a single semester where you don’t make it to the gym or find time to be active in some capacity can lead to five, ten, or even fifteen pounds packed on by the end of finals. Now, not to brag, but I was one of the lucky ones who actually dropped weight when I got to college. I played lacrosse and swam in high school, but a series of injuries sidelined me, leading to a pause in my active lifestyle. I’ll admit I graduated high school being heavier than I would have liked, but by the end of the summer I had taken off 30 pounds. When I saw my high school friends the following summer, I got to sit and enjoy the fact that they all had to buy bigger clothes while I was going for a smaller size. When I got to college I tried to continue being active, and for a while I succeeded. But eventually there came a day when I had too much homework to make it to the gym. That day was quickly followed by a slew of days with worse and worse excuses for skipping my workout until next thing I knew, I hadn’t gone in a month. This on

again off again relationship with working out has continued throughout my college career. Some semesters have been better than others for finding the time to hit the gym, but no matter what I’ve made an effort to eat healthy(ish). I’m not a fan of diets, but I’m a fan of having a healthy diet. Choosing to eat grilled chicken and salad over fries and burgers is probably one of the only reasons I’ve kept weight off while in college. Don’t get me wrong, I have my days where I eat like crap. I’m a Buffalo girl born and raised; there is no way in hell I’ll ever give up my pizza and wings, Anderson’s ice cream or local craft brews. However, for every meal I say “screw it” and indulge in a local favorite, there are two where I reach for the healthier choice. So here I am, senior year of college and able to say I weigh less now than I did at my high school graduation, but I can’t say I’m in better shape. It’s been over a year since I ran a mile, and I’m not able to squat half of what I could in high school. Granted, back then I was preparing to potentially play division one lacrosse, but still, I’ll admit I’m not in the greatest of shape. After some deliberation, I decided to join Chris’s Tough Mudder team. My friends will probably groan as they read this because the last thing I need is another obligation on my plate, but they’ll get over it. I truly want to get back in shape, but the only way that is going to happen is if I’m held accountable to someone; and who better to announce my goal to than 28,000 people? On that note, I have a challenge for the rest of you: email us your fitness goal for the semester and keep us updated on how you’re doing. In our last issue before break, we’ll do a spotlight on whoever has done the most to reach their goal. Happy Work Out!

STAFF Editor in Chief Ally Balcerzak Managing Editor Keighley Farrell Creative Director Melissa Osterweil Assistant Creative Director Emily Butler Photo Editor Dinorah Santos Web Editor Gabrielle Gosset Copy Editor Lee Auslander Associate Editors Laura Borschel Carlton Brock Paul Stephan Circulation Director Dan Warne Business Manager Brian Kalish Ad Manager Jessica Bornes

Ally Balcerzak

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year, UB students get two days off for Jewish holidays in September. Rosh Hashanah is on MonJewish This day, September 17 this year, and Yom Kippur falls on Wednesday the 26th. Observant Jews will be blowing ram’s horn and fasting, respectively. For everyone Holidays the else, it’s a much-needed day off. Mazel tov!

Oktoberfest: Buffalo Central Terminal: September 28-29 Eat, drink, celebrate German heritage, and drink some more at the biggest Oktoberfest in Western New York. It’s held at the Buffalo Central Terminal, a building that’s now being restored to its historical glory.

is investigating 125 students suspected of cheating on a take-home final exam in an IntroducCheating Harvard tion to Congress class. On the one hand, the professhould have known how easy it is to cheat on a take-home test. On the other hand, really, Harvard? at sor You guys should be smart enough to at least not get Harvard caught. BS

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House in January of last year. Since then White White White House Chefs have crafted Honey Ale, Honey Blond Ale, Honey Porter beers. The Honey Ale recipe was released on the White House Website on September 1. House and Your move, Mitt Romney. Beer Barack Obama purchased a home brewing kit for the

Presidential Candidate Paul Ryan told reporters Three-Hour Vice that he ran a marathon in under three hours. Turns out his real time was just over four hours. Maybe wouldn’t have been such a big deal if he hadn’t Marathon this also lied half a dozen times during his speech at the Republican National Convention.

David Brooks: September 20th David Brooks who is an opt. columnist for the New York Times is coming to UB September 20th as part of the Distinguished Speakers Series.

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Obama did an AMA (ask me anything) on reddit. He answered ten questions during an hour Ask President period. A few of the questions included: “What’s the for the White House’s beer?”, “Who’s your favorite basketball player?”, and “How do you balance Me recipe family life and hobbies with, well, being the POTUS?” AMA was so popular that server actually Anything Obama’s crashed for about a half an hour.

ChickFil-A

The perpetuating Chick-Fil-A scandal that will not disappear. The company keeps reinforcing its stance on same sex marriage. In the meantime, they’re still selling their famous peach milkshakes with a side of hate.

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Sometimes You Can’t Make Exceptions Article By: Lee Auslander

bortion. It invokes such controversy that it is no wonder that it is a major issue in the presidential elections. They have existed since ancient times when women would take abortifacient herbs in order to induce a miscarriage, among other various methods. Presently, the issue of abortion is not just divided into two sides. Yes, there are those who are pro-life and pro-choice, but there are, as evidenced by the Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney, people who believe in the exception law. They believe that abortion should be illegal except of cases of rape, incest and threats to the life of the mother. Unfortunately, it is exceptions like this that do not work.

Pro-lifers view the issue as the fetus’ right to life, rather than the woman’s right to choose. Which is why I don’t understand the exception policy. By stating that a woman does not have the right to choose unless she was raped, engaged in incest (whether by force or not), or her life is threatened, the points that pro-choice groups and pro-life groups argue are lost. The policy would both remove the choice and would still allow for abortions to continue, though at smaller numbers. Or would it?

Those who are pro-choice make the usual case that it is the woman’s right to choose what she does with her body, especially if she is confronted with a difficult issue such as pregnancy by rape. Pro-lifers may counter argue that abortion is murder and that no matter what the origins of the unborn child, abortion is still killing a human being. The argument of when life begins further complicates the issue. Religious groups may be adamant that life begins at conception while pro-choice groups have not seem to form a clear uniform opinion among them. These religious groups further complicate the issue since they use their beliefs to judge whether abortion is right rather than looking at the bigger picture. Though the country is supposed to separate church and state matters, some of its citizens have disregarded that. Their insistence that life begins at conception is not rooted in science, as scientists have yet to determine an answer, and they may never. It is not only religious groups that maintain abortion is wrong, and it is not only the men, despite that people are accusing the government and the GOP for waging a ‘war against women.’ Though there are other issues involved in this ‘war’ such as access to affordable healthcare and the ability to obtain Plan B and contraceptives when necessary, it is interesting to note that abortion is only part of this ‘war’ in the perspective of pro-choicers.

Even mothers whose lives are threatened may still get refused an abortion. Just like how pharmacists may state that distributing Plan B is against their beliefs and therefore they won’t. There have also been cases where doctors have refused abortions, despite the possibility of serious complications for mother or child, or even death for both. In the Dominican Republic, where abortions are banned, doctors hesitated to give a 16-year-old her chemotherapy treatments for her leukemia because it might have terminated her pregnancy. She only received her treatments 20 days after admittance to the hospital and she died shortly after. Could she have died even if she did get the treatments? Yes, but her chances probably would have been better. The phrase “threat to the life of the mother” is also too vague.

to the child and raise him/her, or put the child up for adoption. While commendable, a woman should not be forced into this option. She should not have to go through pregnancy and pay the medical bills for it if it was not her choice to engage in sex. And that’s assuming she can. If a dancer was raped and impregnated, her income is limited now that she can no longer do her job. The next option, of course, is abortion. But under such a policy, this option is not easily obtained. For starters, if a woman wants an abortion, she will need to claim she was raped. Sure, easy enough when you just think about it, but if a woman was actually raped, this is not easy, as evidenced by the low report rate of such crimes. But say she does, how does everyone know she’s not lying? Maybe she’s just crying rape in order to get an abortion? Insert chaos here. True rape victims will be scrutinized even more, leading to tougher investigation of the horrors they have had to endure during the crime. Incest is easier to prove since fetal genetic matter can be extracted, but try to imagine a terrified underage girl, raped by her domineering relative, telling a cop just so she can get an abortion. How can the government prove who was raped and who wasn’t? How will it ensure only rape victims will get the abortions? And lastly, who’s to say desperate victims won’t get back alley abortions in order to avoid such a process? The exception policy sounds good in theory only. The law is supposed to provide justice and equality and in this aspect, it would fail.

Rape victims, as well as victims of incest, are not likely to go running straight to police to give an account of their story. Sure, some will report the crimes, but it is not an easy thing to do and those who do should be commended for it. Why? Rape and incest are crimes that are to be handled extremely delicately, but often the crimes don’t get reported because the victims are traumatized. Now, let’s say that a woman who was raped becomes pregnant. In a world where only this policy exists, she has very few options. She can either choose to give birth

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Borderlands 2 Release: September 18 When the first Borderlands came out, the truly unique randomizing generator that literally created thousands upon thousands of weapon choices, striking cell-shaded graphics and distinctive humor impressed gamers. Borderlands delivered on its declared genre of Role Playing Shooter (mix of Role Playing Game (RPG) and First Person Shooter (FPS)) and it won Game of the Year. While it wasn’t without flaws, the first game set the tone for a different kind of game and the highly anticipated sequel seems to have taken criticism well. The most disappointing thing about the first game was the storyline that left gamers wanting more, but the sequel seems to have addressed that issue, introducing new vault hunters (playable characters) with new skills and abilities, and more charismatic villains, along with a better organized and accessible menu. Borderlands 2 seems to have thrown away the bad and amped up the good from the first game.

Halo 4

Release: November 6 Admittedly I was, at first, on the skeptic bandwagon, as Bungie broke free of its Microsoft contract and moved away from the Halo universe leaving 343 Industries to take the reins on one of the most popular franchises. Bungie had been an attentive game studio, perfecting online multiplayer game play while releasing new content, maps, and challenges long after the initial release of each Halo game. But 343 Industries has not disappointed and has actually gone above and beyond the call of duty (pun definitely intended) to produce an innovative game that incorporates the best aspects of other popular shooters, introducing new tactical packages, support upgrades and armor abilities. Halo 4 is also revolutionizing the gaming industry by creating a concurrent live-action web series, Forward Unto Dawn, which introduces new characters and will continue to inspire new challenges after the initial release.

Wii U

Release: November The days of the Nintendo Wii has ended. Equipped with a new controller and a slew of new games (Mario, Super Smash Brothers, etc.) and ports (Mass Effect 3, Arkham City) launching around it, the Wii U could become your new favorite Anti-Studying tool.

Call of Duty: Black Ops 2 Release: November 13 Keeping with tradition, the newest addition to the Call of Duty franchise releases a mere year after the last sequel. The killstreaks are different, but not radically there are new additions to weaponry and maps, but ultimately it’s the game with which you’ll be replacing your Modern Warfare 3 as everyone migrates over to the new game for multiplayer, and there’s nothing wrong with that! Sure, there’s a storyline and it has promise, but it’s the multiplayer that shines with Call of Duty games. One of the most praised decisions is the removal of the much -hated Last Stand that allowed downed players to equip their pistol while on the ground in an attempt to kill their slayer, leading many people to falsely assume their prey was in queue for respawn, only to be killed by a single pistol shot from the ground. Black Ops 2 may have more of the same, but it will still be fun and entertaining, like the other half a dozen Call of Duty games that came before it.

Tekken Tag Tournament 2 Released: September 11th This long awaited sequel reintroduces the number one fighting franchise in the world to the tagging system with every character ever. Wanna pair Jin Kazama and Tiger Jackson? Go for it. Also included are a new online play mode. A ton of customization options for every fighter and Snoop Dog.... Errr Snoop Lion.

Dishonored

Release: October 9 This assassin game from Bethesda, the makers of Skyrim focuses on a linear story granting the player a myriad of powers. With each and every testing showing a new way to complete the story this game promises to give an individual experience to every player.

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PULSE

Mormons In Defense of

Article by: Paul Stephan

ormons have been a big topic of conversation recently. Mitt Romney was once a leader in the Church, the Book of Mormon has been racking up awards on Broadway, and the church is still running its “I’m a Mormon” advertizing campaign. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, as Mormons are formally called, has a bad reputation, and it’s easy to see why. It makes sense that we’d question a faith with an all-male clergy, a strange set of beliefs, and a history of sexual abuse. But enough about the Catholic Church. We love to criticize things that we don’t know much about, while we’re complacent about the things with which we grew up. Sure, Mormons do some nutty things, but nothing more nutty than any other faith. To give a brief introduction, Joseph Smith, a young man from Palmyra, NY, claimed to have seen several visions in the 1820s, in which God directed him to found a new religion. Smith dug up some gold plates buried on a hillside and translated them into the Book of Mormon, which is sort of like a sequel to the Bible. For the most part, Mormons believe in the key tenants of Christianity but have a

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different view of the afterlife and have some extra rituals. Smith attracted followers and the LDS church was formed. In keeping with American tradition, this new group faced persecution because they were different. They headed west to avoid all the trouble, which is why there are so many Mormons now living in Utah. When Mormonism is mentioned, two big criticisms are normally brought up: polygamy and racism. The early church once supported polygamy but outlawed it in 1890. Less proudly, blacks were not allowed to join the priesthood until 1978. At least on the discrimination score, Mormons are in good company. Supporters of slavery and segregation have often used the Bible to rationalize their beliefs. Bob Jones University, a conservative Christian college in South Carolina, didn’t allow interracial dating until the year 2000. And organized religion is still the biggest advocate of homophobia in this country. Seen on its own, the LDS church seems a little crazy. But placed next to other faith traditions, it hardly stands out at all. Mormons wear Temple Garments, dubbed Magic Underwear by critics, which they

believe grants them spiritual protection. But Jews have yarmulkes, Muslims have burqas, and the Pope has that weird hat. Religious people like wearing clothes that make them feel special. Mormons also hold beliefs that are just factually wrong. For example, the Church teaches that God led a bunch of Jews from Jerusalem to the Americas in 600 BC. But what would religion be if it didn’t occasionally fly in the face of reality? Catholics believe that a communion wafer and wine will turn into the body and blood of Jesus, which is both incorrect and extremely creepy. Eastern religions preach “alternative medicine”, which is mostly mystical hippy nonsense. And don’t even get me started on Young Earth Creationism… This is not a full-throated endorsement of the Latter-Day Saints. Nor is it a total denunciation of all organized religion. The big point I’m trying to make here is this: Be fair to those you criticize. Don’t hold Mormonism to a higher standard than you do your own beliefs. If you have a problem with Mormons’ views on women or racial minorities, you should be equally critical of Christianity, Islam, and a bunch of other faiths. If you think someone else’s beliefs are strange,

just remember that your Jewish roommate expects God to smile upon him because he doesn’t eat bacon. I should note that the LDS Church does have very respectable prescriptions on how to live your everyday life. Mormons abstain from consuming caffeine, alcohol, and drugs. Their tenets emphasize personal responsibility, self-improvement, and a strong work ethic. Because of this, some commentators, notably Harvard Business School professor Clayton Christensen, have argued that Mormons make particularly good business leaders and politicians. That last point is debatable, but in any case, Mormonism isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Sure, they have some crazy beliefs and practices, but so does every other religion. As for Mitt Romney, there are a lot of reasons to be afraid of his presidency, but his Mormon faith isn’t one of them. We don’t like things that we don’t understand. Some of the hatred towards Mormons is just old-fashioned American bigotry, but a lot of it comes from our unfamiliarity with the tradition. If we want to understand how a group of people can believe so many weird things, looking at our own strange ideas about the world is a good place to start.

PULSE

Observing Our Government

r. Gregory House said multiple times, “everybody lies.” This was absolutely the moral of the story when watching either the Democratic or Republican National Conventions. After any speech, opposing party fact checkers would put out a statement saying what was true and what was false. Several Republican presidents since Jimmy Carter have left office with the country in a worse state than before they left office. Job growth isn’t as great as it was advertised. And we may or may not be in a terrible or wonderful time of social change depending on which conference you paid more attention to. But as is the nature of politics some truths and lies are merely perspective based. Other than the lies several standout speeches, both good and bad made for a very impressive set of conferences. Going into the Republican National Conference there were several questions about recently named Vice Presidential Candidate, Paul Ryan, and also Presidential Candidate Romney. Could the pair inspire a Republican party to continue their faith in them? How would they match up against the charisma of Barack Obama?

Article by: Carlton Brock

ney also stressed this point while stressing how she believed that her husband was the best choice for America. Love also became an overarching theme for Ann Romney. Her successor Gov. Chris Christie also echoed this, though several points of his speech seemed to counteract Mrs. Romney. Christie said in his speech, “In your life there would be times when you have to choose if you can between being loved and respected.” While this statement came across as aggressive and counterintuitive compared to Mrs. Romney’s statement, it too did its job in aiding the promotion of the presidential candidate. Now onto the less than successful moment of the Conference, the now infamous, “empty chair speech.” For those that didn’t see the speech Eastwood stood up and spoke to an empty chair meant to represent our president in front of a bewildered crowd. While Clint Eastwood surely meant something more serious than what he ended up saying, the speech has already been parodied in the media. Perhaps it’s a good thing that media’s biggest joke of either conference was not the fault of any politician.

More or less, Romney did answer these questions. Romney’s speech spoke of his love for the country while simultaneously attacking Obama. He stated that Obama has yet to fix all of our problems. “This president can tell us it was someone else’s fault,” Romney said of the president in his speech, “This president can tell us that the next four years he’ll get it right. But this president cannot tell us that you’re better off today than when he took office.”

The next week was the Democratic Conference. Where the Republican Conference covered wide area to make sure it appealed to Republicans of all shapes and sizes, the Democrats displayed a unified front. Combating the most conservative Republican policy in decades the Democrats utilized a myriad of powerful speeches to showcase their best weapon, the ability to speak.

The sentiment of America being in the same or worse condition as when Obama took over seemed to be a major theme for the Republicans. Romney’s idea was echoed in every speech. Mrs. Ann Rom-

In a normal capacity a speech by Barack Obama would be the highlight of any group of speeches. And to the credit of the President his speech was more than adequate but it was what we expected of

the president. The most impressive speeches came from Bill Clinton and Michelle Obama. Mrs. Obama while saying nothing that she hasn’t said before, did something few other speakers at either convention successfully did. She connected to the crowd in a big way utilizing a heartwarming speech about her love for Barack. And while the subject matter was much the same as Ann Romney’s speech at the RNC, Michelle came across much more powerfully due purely to the crowd reaction. The other major part of the speeches was Bill Clinton, whom many feel sold Barack to even independent voters. While Clinton and Obama have historically been more distant, Clinton’s delivery along with subsequent body language when face to face with the President made Barack look better. While one minor interaction is not going to make or break an election having a widely loved former president endorse you certainly doesn’t hurt. Another interesting thing to note about the entire conference was that the Republicans set up a base camp of sorts a few miles away fvrom the DNC so they could fact check any speeches or announcements. While fact checking is nowhere near uncommon, it was noteworthy that they placed a base so publicly near the DNC in the first place. All in all the two conferences made for a good round of television as well as gave you a good preview of what the elections will be like this year. It is going to be a dogfight, more so than it has been with the string of negative ads. Both sides make very valid arguments for how the country should be run and both sides have bent the truth to make us voters see things their way.

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HE SAID Yo, why do the girls’ dorm bathrooms have locks but the guys’ don’t? H: Think of the combination as a way to make women’s lives harder. We men can just walk in without extra effort. Who says sexism is dead? S: There are magical hidden secrets within; fountains of free flowing birth control and fields of reasonably priced tampons. Any man who enters is blinded. When I’m working up a lather in the shower, is it okay to have a meating with myself, so to speak? H: Absolutely. Who doesn’t love easy clean-up? And don’t worry about other people using the shower after you. I’m pretty sure the 70 degree water sanitizes everything. S: No. Absolutely not. No one wants to swim in your swimmers. What is good urinal etiquette? H: Don’t look at anyone else’s junk. Well, just be discreet about it if you do. S: Well, first you stand next to your friend (or total stranger) and start up a conversation about phallic shaped objects, including but not limited to: bananas, rocket ships, hot dogs, and Long Island. What’s the best bathroom on campus? Hurry up, I really have to go. H: From worst to best: Ellicott food court, first floor of the Union, Knox, NSC, a bush in South Campus. S: Here are a few of my favorites: the fourth floor of the Union, in the middle of the tunnel near Spaulding on a thirsty Thursday, the sixth floor of Capen, and the unfinished bathrooms on the first floor of Clemens.

SHE SAID I walked into the guys’ bathroom and there was a girl washing her hands in there, so I decided to use the girls’ room instead. Was I “that guy”? H: As the Supreme Court said, separate but equal is not okay. So stick it to the man and use whatever bathroom you want! Just don’t pee on the seat. S: Clearly, there are some politically misinformed people here. Obviously this is a states’ rights issue. My opinion is whatever Ron Paul has to say. Ron Paul 2012!

So my boyfriend and I really enjoy having sex in non-traditional places. Recently my roommate walked in on us having shower sex in my dorm bathroom. Should we keep doing it or not? H: Invite your roommate to join in next time. Then she won’t feel so weird, it’s less work for you, and I’m sure your boyfriend won’t mind either. S: There are plenty of other alternative places to have sex. Why don’t you try the locked meeting rooms in a library on campus. Or you could always try getting it on at the Student Response Center while you are waiting for them to process your financial aid. Also, you get bonus points for multi-tasking. Every Friday and Saturday night my floormates get white girl wasted and puke all over the bathroom completely missing the toilet. The cleaning staff doesn’t come in on weekends and I can’t take it anymore. How do I deal with these assholes? H: It sounds like you need to keep your drunk peers from entering the bathroom. Rub hair-gel into the carpet and they’ll go searching for Guidos. By the time they realize you’ve led them to the Geography depart-

Article By: Laura Borschel and Paul Stephan

ment, they’ll forget they ever had to puke. S: Stop being such a Negative Nancy. Put on your shortest dress, highest heels, and join them. I forgot to wear shower shoes last week and now I have warts all over my feet. Is it possible to get genital warts from dorm showers? H: Maybe. If you’re worried, you can always go to Michael Hall to get it checked out. On second thought, you’ll probably leave that place with something much worse than genital warts. S: First, you need to get angry. Then you need to rub your feet everywhere. For instance, your roommate’s pillow, or your ex-girlfriend’s sleeping mask. What do girls do when they go to the bathroom together? H: Here’s the thing: when Millard Fillmore left UB he built an underground chamber and put a giant snake down there. All the girls’ bathrooms link to it and they go together so they don’t get captured. S: Contrary to popular belief, what men presume happens at slumber parties actually occurs when girls go to the bathroom together. Past the door, a lingerie pillow-fight club ensues. Unless, you know, they just have to pee.

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ike thousands of other devoted Bat-fans, when the clock struck midnight on July 20th, 2012, I was planted firmly in the seat of my local movie theater, practically foaming at the mouth in anticipation for the latest installment of Christopher Nolan’s Dark Knight saga. There were many people in costume, a few Batmen, a few Jokers, I even saw a Darth Vader, which I thought was pretty snide and hilarious. It was a night of solidarity and fraternity among those in attendance, a night that was nothing but fun and excitement from the moment the film rolled to its end credits, almost three hours later. I cannot express how unprepared I was to hear the headline of that morning’s news report: “Twelve Are Killed at Showing of Batman Movie in Colorado.” Instantly, I thought to myself: That could have been me. That could have been any of us.

James Holmes, a 24-year-old college honor student, could have been any one of our peers here on campus. Not different at all in age, background, or daily routine. Extremely intelligent, reportedly shy in demeanor, he had no criminal record up until this point, and until a few weeks prior to the shooting, displayed no discernible signs of mental illness. At 12:38 am, James Holmes entered the Aurora Century 16 multiplex, dressed in head-to-toe ballistics. Many members of the audience assumed that it was some kind of premiere-related promotion, and that Holmes was a hired actor. Their amusement turned quickly to horror as Holmes set off two smoke-screen devices and began to open fire on the audience. Twelve were killed, and 58 more were injured, making it “the largest mass shooting in U.S. history.” (Good Morning -16- America.) Police were on the scene in less than five minutes, and took Holmes in to

custody without any struggle. According to a few law officials, he was calling himself “The Joker,” and had dyed his hair a fiery red-orange, no doubt a nod to the Batman series’ infamous villain, whose hair was bright green. Upon arrest, Holmes warned officers that he had booby-trapped his apartment to explode, should anyone open the door. When he left his apartment, he left loud music on inside so that if anyone came to turn the music down, the explosives would detonate. Police described the scene as “disturbing” and “elaborate,” and speculate that the number of explosives planted could have easily blown up not only Holmes’ entire apartment building, but also any near to it. He is currently still being tried, and is pleading mental illness. A few months before the shooting, Holmes was rejected from a neuroscience program at Alabama University. “Professors at an Alabama University described James Holmes as an excellent candidate for their neuroscience program in February 2011, but rejected him anyway after his behavior raised concerns.” (Huffington Post) Campus psychiatrist Lynne Fenton had to call the police when Holmes appeared before her, irate about not being accepted. What the university then dismissed as bitter rejection or social ineptitude obviously evolved in to something not only more severe, but because of the lack of response to Holmes unstable mental state, something permanent. Holmes was alienated by those he respected, and used his disappointment and anger as fuel to take his fate in to his own hands. Despite being far above-average in intelligence, he obviously didn’t know, or rather, didn’t care about, how much pain and suffering he would cause the families of those who did not survive.

The tragedy of the shooting is obvious, but there is a great deal of controversy over whether or not Hollywood should be held accountable for this enormously affected man’s actions. Holmes was an enormous Batman fan, so we know the setting he chose and the allusion to the Joker were very deliberate. However, the crime he committed was not necessarily sampled directly from any of the films’ plotlines or action scenes, making the shooting and the apartment-ambush an original creation. Nonetheless, many people are claiming that Nolan and Warner Brothers should be held responsible for the influence the films had on Holmes’ obviously unstable mind, and that the films glorified villains and violence just as much, if not more, than the heroism showcased by the films’ title front man. In response to the shooting, director Christopher Nolan had this to say: “I would not presume to know anything about the victims of the shooting but that they were there last night to watch a movie. I believe movies are one of the great American art forms and the shared experience of watching a story unfold on screen is an important and joyful pastime. The movie theatre is my home, and the idea that someone would violate that innocent and hopeful place in such an unbearably savage way is devastating to me. Nothing any of us can say could ever adequately express our feelings for the innocent victims of this appalling crime, but our thoughts are with them and their families.” (E! News.) Other key members of the Dark Knight enterprise stepped forward in sympathy as well; Christian Bale, the star of the films, visited the victims personally to console them and applaud their bravery. Hans Zimmer, the composer of the Dark Knight soundtrack (as well as the soundtracks for Inception, Sherlock Holmes, the Pirates of the Carribean films, and many more) composed and recorded a song in memoriam of those who were involved in the shooting, entitled “Aurora.” Warner Brothers have taken extra steps to ensure the integrity of the victims, including pulling the trailer for the upcoming film Gangster Squad. “One scene from the trailer, which can be viewed at the 2:03 minute mark… features four men standing behind a movie screen in trenchcoats, walking towards the audience shooting at them with automatic weapons as mayhem erupts in the theater.” (Huffington Post.) It is apparent that those involved with the making of the Dark Knight series are doing their part to offer a hand to those who survived and those who have lost their family and friends. However, one is left to wonder if all of their efforts are entirely out of empathy and sympathy, or if some of their motifs are rooted in guilt. It is easy to argue that without the Dark Knight films, Holmes wouldn’t have had the inspiration to commit this atrocious random act of violence. But is that a fair accusation to make? I do not believe it is. The media’s influence on the mentally unstable is a prevalent theme in human history. What you take in from the world around you is going to bend and shape your world view, your own personal perspective. However, not everyone who viewed (and enjoyed) the Dark Knight films felt the sudden urge to commit atrocities against humanity. In my opinion, the Dark Knight films hardly glorify villainy; each of the 3 films in the series has a different spectrum of villains, who all face their demise in one form or another. It is hard to ignore the setting of the shooting; the Aurora multiplex is only about 20 miles away from Columbine High School, where 13 people were killed and 21 more were injured in the 1999 massacre. “…the psychological echo and the similar feel of the two massacres was palpable: Theater 9 was a place of seeming safety, if not sanctuary, not unlike Columbine’s library, where some of the killings occurred. Both were ordinary settings that became death traps.” (The New York Times) The shooting is also very reminiscent of the Virginia Tech Massacre of 2007, where Seung-Hui Cho, a senior at the university, slaughtered 32 people and injured 17 others, before killing himself. Like Holmes, Cho’s mental illness slid under the radar, due to laws protecting his privacy in regards to his university application. Growing up with severe anxiety and depression, Cho felt isolated from his parents, peers, and mentors, and never received

the proper mental care and attention he needed to combat his diseases. Trey Perkins, a student and survivor of the massacre, told the Washington Post “He knew exactly what he was doing… I have no idea why he did what he decided to do. I just can’t say how lucky I am to have made it.” A common theme rings true: The human mind is a fragile and complex system, and just like machines, can easily malfunction. It is malleable by the world around it, be it the people we know or the people we see on screens and in print. While it is not the responsibility of the filmmakers, actors, and directors to protect the lives of each individual movie-goer, our society IS responsible for the desensitization of violence we are exposed to in everyday life, coupled with a lack of proper education about the consequences of violence. Our society is invigorated by fictional violence in movies, television, video games, even music. We unknowingly celebrate the idea of dominance and superiority, over other countries, other races, and inevitably other individuals. The Dark Knight series is one based off of the idea of vigilantism, taking the fate of “wrong-doers” into ones own hands. But of course, this is always subjective to the “hero’s” morality and opinion, which, we know now, can be misconstrued. James Holmes saw some merit to the ideas of organized chaos and random violence, and with his inspiration, along with a vendetta against the world that had caused him to suffer, slaughtered innocent people. Many believe that it isn’t the violence in the media that causes violence to manifest in reality, but that it is the individual’s psyche, and while I believe this to hold truth as well, it is crucial for each of us to hold ourselves accountable for our actions. Like I previously mentioned, what has left me the most shaken is the idea that anyone is capable of horror such as this, and it is not always detectable by a simple glance or conversation. The media is just that, a medium for ideas to flow from person to person, and occasionally should be taken with a grain of salt. It is the individual stories that are the true tragedy here, the fall of a man whose broken dreams led to the deaths of innocent civilians who barely had the chance to live out their own dreams and aspirations. It is imperative we take the time each day to be grateful for our lives, that we have the freedoms we possess. It certainly made me aware of my own mortality, and even more so, it made me aware of how I treat those around me. Any one of us has the potential for evil, but it’s the everyday good that keeps us sane. And for some, it takes the tragedy of yesterday to see the hope of a better tomorrow.

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G N I W Article by: Ally Balcerzak

rowing up in Buffalo I’ve come to expect certain things in life: snow on Christmas morning, Canadian accents when I go to Target on the weekend, and fantastic food that nowhere else in the country can come close to mimicking. I’ll admit that I have been that person who goes on vacation, orders a dish that originates from my hometown, and then proceeds to proclaim how it tastes nothing like the original. It’s one of those character traits that I’m not too proud of. But then again, why do other cities even attempt to make beef on weck or chicken wings? For those of you who aren’t aware of Buffalo’s food history, you are currently in a town that created some of the biggest staples in bar food. The most popular of creations is of course: the chicken wing. Now, let’s get one thing straight, it is a CHICKEN wing, not a BUFFALO wing. Last I checked, buffalos do not have wings and cannot fly. Therefore, if you ever see “Buffalo wings” on a menu, you should stay as far away from them as possible because they are lying to you about the meat involved. Years ago, Dominic Bellissimo walked into his parents’ restaurant, the Anchor Bar, late one night with his friends. His mother, Teressa, went in the back to make a snack for the hungry college students but only had limited supplies since it was the end of the night. Seeing the chicken wings that she would normally use to prepare stock, she quickly came up with the idea of deep-frying and then coating them in a cayenne pepper sauce, thus giving us the greatest accompaniment to pizza ever created. Over the years the chicken wing has seen a lot of change, but the basic elements are still the same. Those fun little “boneless buffalo wings” at Applebee’s are merely glorified chicken nuggets and nothing more. To make true wings, you need some sort of sauce (preferably something with a kick) and wings with the skin on. If the wing is boneless, skinless, or breaded, don’t even think about calling it a chicken wing. One of the best times to check out different takes on the classic snack is at the national chicken wing festival, which is of course held here in Buffalo. It’s one of the newer food festivals in town, but it still attracts plenty of people from all over. The festival is held over Labor Day weekend at the end of each summer, closing out the last weekend of festival season. After trying a few places a both the festival and just around Buffalo, I feel comfortable naming a few of the best and worst places for wings.

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BuffaLove

Anchor Bar It’s difficult to find better wings than the Anchor Bar. Maybe part of the appeal is in the fact that they’re the original chicken wing, but the wings here are always delicious. A good wing should be crispy and not overly sauced, which I think Anchor Bar does perfectly. I recommend going for the medium wings if you like a little heat but nothing overpowering.

Bocce Club Pizza While Bocce pizza is a favorite of mine, their wings are a little shy on the sauce for my liking. The crispiness is there, but whether you get hot, medium or mild, the sauce tends to get sucked into the skin. I recommend ordering BBQ wings from here if you’re going to get them because those tend to have a better sauce to crisp ratio.

Buffalo Wild Wings My favorite thing about Buffalo Wild Wings is the fact that they are a national chain that actually makes a true chicken wing. Some of their flavors are a little too out there for my liking, such as the Asian Zing and Caribbean Jerk, but the variety of sauce available is nice if you have a large group who all like different things. I recommend going for one of the unique flavors if you’ve grown up eating real wings, or a more traditional sauce if you haven’t.

Duff’s Famous Wings There is fair amount of debate among people as to whether Duff ’s or the Anchor Bar has better wings. Duff ’s is certainly home to the hotter sauces, but I find their wings to be just a hair too crispy sometimes. Never-the-less, the wings are still fantastic. I recommend the mild-medium for the average wing eater. Be warned, the Death wings are not for the faint of heart.

La Nova

La Nova pizza and wings are a favorite of locals. The wings have a decent crisp to them and the amount of sauce is great. My only qualm is the lack of heat to the medium and hot sauces. I recommend these wings if you’re not looking for a spice that is unbearable and even a little more on the mild side.

Legend Larry’s

Hailing from Sheboygan, Wisconsin, these wings fall flat. The line for them at Wing Fest was long, but after trying their wings, I have no clue why. They were mushy and way too saucy. I tried the Honey BBQ and felt like I was swallowing pure honey, while the Spicy Bacon tasted like terrible hot sauce with a single crumb of bacon thrown in. I recommend staying away from these wings entirely.

BuffaLove

Havoc and Bright Light’s Review Article by: Carlton Brock

*It should be noted for reviewing purposes I am using the iTunes version of this album and listened to other songs not included on YouTube.

classic self and seems to be much more in line with her recent studio albums. Another thing to note is the lack of speed in her songs on Havoc and Bright Lights. Each and every song seems to be at a slower pace, which while making it sound more mature, does little for a casual listener. There’s nothing to draw one in without previous knowledge here.

Speaking of exclusives, multiple versions of this album were released, meaning that someone downloading from iTunes got a different package than someone buyt takes a lot to make it big in the music industry. It ing from Amazon or Target. For the same value it is sugtakes a lot more to stay in the music industry. And it gested you buy from iTunes as that version also comes takes a lot more to stay relevant in the music industry. with the music video for her track, “Guardian,” a note Alanis Morissette is one of those people on the cusp of from Alanis, the album’s credits, three tracks not in the losing her relevance. The change isn’t bad, just as people grow the music has standard album and a few nice photos to assist in your to change over time to match their growth. Some songs listening pleasure. Another version of the album comes Alanis Morissette is not an artist that is typically brought on the album have made the best of the change in with a collection of live tracks from both the album and up when talking about the wait for upcoming albums. pacing. The track titled, Edge of Evolution is perhaps the the older hits. This is mainly because she has such an irregular rebest example of this as Alanis has taken full advantage lease table. The Canadian singer-songwriter has not re- of her pace to produce a melodic song sure to entice While the first thirteen songs are the same on every leased an album since 2008’s Flavors of Entanglement. the listener. And while the lyrics lack the bite that they version, the differing versions may frustrate a die-hard Prior to that, she released So Called Chaos in 2004 This had in previous albums, they still sound wonderful due fan who wants to have every track. Legally the only way past August she released her latest studio effort. Due to to Alanis’s vocal talent. to obtain every track is to purchase it from at least four spacing and little promotion, Morissette’s studio release different sellers, and in Japan. of Havoc and Bright Lights was somewhat of a surprise. One of the bigger deals about this album is the pro And while it won’t create a mass of new fans for Alanis, duction. A lot of the album sounds heavily produced Havoc and Bright Lights will not make any new fans. In it will be interesting to older fans. and less bare than previous albums. The other thing the end, this album will be looked at as Alanis following that is apparent is her use of more spiritual sounding her own status quo. It is average in every sense of the Anyone who listens to Alanis after hearing her 90’s hit backgrounds. And while it may sound like a perception word, which is disappointing if one was waiting for her album, Jagged Little Pill will instantly draw the comof heaven from a movie, it doesn’t quite fit in with music to make a classic album. If she is attempting to stay parisons. This is not the Alanis Morissette that while released today. relevant or gain new fame in a music industry that is angst ridden unleashed her fury on “You Oughta Know”. growing further and further away from the peak of her Instead this album carries an overarching theme of Sadly, my last sentiment holds true even for her attempt fame, this album is not the way to do it. happiness and peace. Thematically she sounds much to cross promote by including a verse of rap on the more mature. The melodic tune of the album in combiiTunes exclusive track, “Jekyll & Hyde”, which features I suggest if you’re a fan, you should buy it. If you aren’t, I nation with the higher and lighter notes of accompanyan unknown rapper named SoulEye. The track itself suggest that you look to Alanis’s older albums first. ing instruments give Alanis a much lighter tone than her sounds too forced and completely out of place.

Upcoming Concerts Hatebreed

The influential metal band Hatebreed is coming to the Town Ballroom Monday, September 17. Supporting acts include: Whitechapel, All Shall Perish, and Deez Nutz. Ticket Price: $19 in advance, $23 at the door Address: 681 Main Street Buffalo, NY 14023 Doors Open: 6:30 pm

Coheed and Cambria Acclaimed rock band Coheed and Cambria is performing with Three Wednesday, September 19 at the Town Ballroom. Ticket Price: $30 Address: 681 Main Street Buffalo, NY 14023 Doors Open: 7 pm

Fiona Apple

Award winning indie artist Fiona Apple is performing at Kleinhans Music Hall Tuesday, October 9. Again, this concert is more on the pricier side, so make sure to reserve your tickets soon. Ticket Price: $40 Address: 3 Symphony Circle Buffalo, NY 14201 Doors Open: 7 pm

Circa Survive

The immensely popular group Circa Survive is playing at the Town Ballroom Thursday, October 25. Other acts include Touche Amore, Balance and Composure, and O’Brother. Ticket Price: $20 in advance, $24 at the door Address: 681 Main Street Buffalo, NY 14023 Doors Open: 6 pm

Article by: Laura Borschel

Ben Folds Five

The super popular alt rock group Ben Folds Five is coming to Kleinhans Music Hall Friday, October 5. Tickets are a bit on the expensive side (forty dollars a pop for reserved seating), but knowing the quality of Ben Folds and his band members will definitely prove to be worth it. Ticket Price: $40 Address: 3 Symphony Circle Buffalo, NY 14201 Doors Open: 7 pm

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LITERARY

“John Doe” Short Story by: Carlton Brock “September 12, 2012: Test Subject, Identified only as John Doe, seems highly unresponsive to any line of questioning. He seems to enjoy sitting and playing with a Rubik’s cube.” I said into the tape recorder. John Doe looked up at me, his two differently colored eyes unblinking as they shifted to look around the room. Even though he had a straight jacket on I felt nervous staring back at him. It was the first time any patient made me nervous. For a brief moment I considered my nearest escape route. This nervousness was ridiculous, perhaps I needed a Xanax. I needed something I was slowly losing control. “They’re coming.” Jon Doe said. He moved the colors on his cube so that the colors formed stripes. I wasn’t sure how he did it, to me the stupid cubes never made sense. And the way he did it made me consider that he may have had any number of mental defects. “Who is coming?” I said quickly. “You don’t use contractions when you speak.” “This is not about me” I said, “This is about you. I want to help you.” “There is no help.” John Doe said, “When the Govians invade you won’t be able to help. Unless you are chosen to be abducted.” “How will I know if I am abducted.” “You won’t know. Aliens coming to Earth would be like

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Columbus meeting the Natives. By the time you realized they were here. You would be dead.” “You are not making any sense.” I said as I began to pace about the room. I walked around for about a minute. Nothing in my education prepared me for this. Perhaps I was going insane. It was getting hot in the room. “Sit down.” John Doe said. I don’t know when, but suddenly he was stretching his sleeves out as if he weren’t tied up. He pointed one sleeve at a glass of water sitting at a table in the padded room. I remember thinking to myself that there wasn’t supposed to be a table in a padded room. And there most certainly was not supposed to be glass. I sat down and looked at John Doe. His skin had taken a purplish hue to it. He was seated with his legs crossed staring at me with his now gigantic bulbous eyes. I shrank back and stared across at him. He reached into my shirt pocket and pulled from it my tape recorder. “Subject is completely oblivious to his own abduction. Continues to live out the fantasy that he is still a psychologist. Our next test subject must be given less of a drug dose in order to maintain mental stability.” I stared up at John Doe and then stared back down at my own coloring book. I hope that Earth is okay.

LITERARY This weeks submissions come from Pharmacy Student Chris Tanski If you’d like to submit please email ubgeneration@gmail.comw

"Roads"

Chasing the sun is a profession proctored by the purposely lost who go down roads born of unattended wives and missed birthdays routes revealed by "I wonder where this leads?" and the appropriate answer: "Who gives a shit?" down gravel paths littered with liquor-loaded dives searching for fringe encounters with blue-collar socialites who slam back Miller Lite like pot-bellied, flannel-skinned Gods down five-lane highways occupied by the doctor, the author, the starved and millions of magnificent nobodies on their way to nowhere in particular and the souls who wander through weathered pit stops still stationed by ancient veterans with hollow smiles in tow who "fill her up" with such savvy (she certainly was not their first) through townships, hamlets, and villages forever restrained to the small town USA mundane day-to-day through diners cast aside to the American Heartland, to Purgatory, to the fucking dogs forgotten eateries frequented only by a brazen few for Fannie’s famous meringue pie and the wistful who go past Gram’s Family Ranch with gleaming grain silos past the elusive, perfect pit stop with its sticky nickel slots yielding sticky little sluts and abandoned vans waving white flags of defeat through half-cracked windows past rest stops resisted by restless hordes of post-9/11 tourists and wind turbines turning tirelessly beneath the hazy Midwestern sun the roads belong to the immortal words of Kerouac, of Dylan, of Ginsberg brilliantly beating beneath each generational cross-road. they belong to the homesick, the wayward, the curious; the roads belong to everyone and to no one. A faded polish bleeds through neon skies over flickering asphalt. Beneath steeled youth, layers upon layers of cracking resolve retire. Cyclical silence dusts rotted foundations. A momentary existence melts with time.

“Rust Belt”

“Matera” You carried the faint scent of sweet rose and vanilla the night we wandered the canyon of Matera. Navigating the aged cobblestone streets of The Sassi, half drunk on a bottle of Moscato wine, we grew hungry and stumbled into our hole in the wall, La Tapa. Greeted by the genial owner Luca, We sat in the comforting curvature of stained mahogany sedias on that autumn evening, whimsically trading white wine sips and bits of truffled topped pizza, listening to the crackles of the wood burning oven, watching our candle's wick grow weary and cold. Between scoops of smooth lemon gelato and fervish glances, we talked of the Tuscan countryside, of the Venice Canals, celebrating past and present with dancing, with more wine, but avoiding talk of the future, of your year long departure, sinking such thoughts in bottomless bottles of Moscato. A year has passed, and the familiar stained sedias remain unchanged, but I now sit alone. Luca pours a crisp glass of matured house white, and I glance to the quiet cobblestone streets, and I talk to him about my present, about our past. He will continue to pour until the morning light crests across a distant horizon, and cathedral bells break my romantic naivety.

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Parting Shots Silly Voters... T

he Republican National Convention had its fair share of moments but the most mystifying moment didn’t involve an empty chair; it happened off-camera. In fact, the GOP made sure that anything involving Rep. Ron Paul never made it past the RNC’s hired private security and onto television screens.

done in the last 30 years. I don’t fully endorse him for president”. As a man whose entire political career has been unwavering from never voting for a tax increase to refusing to deal with Capitol Hill lobbyists, it’s no surprise that Mr. Paul declined the RNC’s generous offer.

To viewers, the RNC looked like a wholesome celebration for the GOP’s predetermined candidate, Mitt Romney, but behind the scenes, a very different opinion was being expressed. Besides the poster confiscation, the RNC also silenced Mr. Paul himself, or more correctly, they gave him a proposition. He was only allowed to speak at the RNC if he delivered remarks pre-approved by the Romney campaign and he fully endorsed Mitt Romney. Mr. Paul vehemently declined, declaring “It wouldn’t be my speech. That would undo everything I’ve

The RNC also refused Ron Paul delegates to be seated, denying Mr. Paul the chance to give a 15-minute speech at the convention. Now, it’s not a secret that the chance of Ron Paul winning the candidacy was slim to none, so why would the RNC be so adamant about silencing him? That 15-minute speech would have aired across the country. That means that thousands of people would have heard a completely different platform from the Republican convention. The Romney/Ryan campaign could not have that. They couldn’t let people

Article By: Gabrielle Gosset hear about Paul’s practical plan to cut spending and bring the troops home, among other dissenting opinions. But no, the RNC did not stop there, they even went so far as to change the rules for delegation for future campaigns in an attempt to stop this kind of radical dissention from what the GOP represents. In a rule change that would have silenced Reagan had it been enacted before 1976, the RNC passed a new rule that instead of having “unbound” delegates, allowing them to vote for whichever candidate they wish, it “would bind delegates in all fifty states to vote for the winner of their state’s Republican primary straw poll at future conventions”

Ryan campaign and while the RNC may have succeeded in silencing Paul supporters and Mr. Paul himself, no matter how many boos they edited out of the CSPAN airing of the convention from Paul supporters, the news got out. Enjoy your smokescreen while it lasts, GOP, because those voters that you’re patting on the head and scolding for acting out will only come back around to bite you.

It’s no surprise that this drastically different platform was a threat to the Romney/

Punch Drunk Love A

s I rode the Stampede a few Friday nights ago with sweat pouring down my brow, surrounded by a wolf pack of frat boys on the prowl, I was hit with a realization: I love the drunk bus. It had really grown on me over the years. It is a love that I can only compare to my love of the delectable yet subtle taste of Richmond’s dormitory cuisine. Everything about the drunk bus is appealing. The long leisurely rides to South Campus, the nice reading material that the ads provided, and the spacious seating options all stood out to me as initial pluses. I still, however, felt that something was missing. Still contemplating my fondness over UB’s transportation system, I came to a conclusion when I witnessed a fellow co-ed light up what appeared to be a rolled cigarette; my fellow

members of the student body had class. It was obvious from the situation that the young man only wanted to freshen the quality of air for everyone else on the bus. I noticed more of this behavior when a girl (somewhat successfully) puked out the window. It was obvious to me now that the true colors of UB were exactly what the side of that bus reflected. As the stampede pulled into the tunnel everything started to come full circle for me. The UB nightlife experience wasn’t just about the drunk bus, it was also about the tunnel, where everything began. I thought back to previous Thursday, Friday, and Saturday nights. The Ellicott tunnel would come alive, steam radiating off of it in waves

Article by: Laura Borschel into the night and swells of students would wander drunkenly towards the heart of all of it; the Elli. The path to the Elli always reminded me of a war zone. Plastic shrapnel from newly emptied water bottles littered the suburban landscape, half-eaten food was discarded haphazardly on the steps leading to the Elli, and the occasional puddle of vomit on the side of a bench that some poor soul always managed to sit in. Some people may be disgusted and horrified by the sight of such ghastly images, but not me.

driver would open one door, making the victory of getting on the bus that much sweeter. All of the thoughts that were looping through my brain soon came to an abrupt halt when the bus lurched forward. My fellow comrades and I had reached our destination back at Ellicott. When the doors opened, we dispersed into scattered groups off to find out dorms. And so the bus rode on, a vehicle amidst the traffic, thrust forward into the endless night.

Once gathered at the center, everyone’s excitement would come to a head when the bus pulled in. Poised and ready to strike, my fellow students and I would become a dense mob, with just one thing on our minds; getting on that bus. On lucky occasions a hospitable bus

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UB Bulls vs. Kent State

Wednesday September 19th at 7:00pm

WRUB and True Blue will be hosting a tailgate event on True Blue Ave starting at 4:00pm Tune in for play-by-play game broadcasting:

sbi.buffalo.edu/wrub

716.645.3370 twitter: @wrub facebook.com/wrubradio

October 25 7:00pm

ke k Ta c ht Ba ig

Thursday

i eN Th

Save the Date!

2 1 20

Student Union Lobby,

North Campus sbihealtheducation.org Facebook.com/SBIhealthed Twitter: @SBIHealthEd

R EFERENDUM 2012

Vote Yes Today for the Mandatory Student Activity Fee

September 18th 19th 20th 9am-5pm STUDENT UNION

Student Activity Fee Supports SPRING FEST FALL FEST FILM SERIES SPEAKER SERIES COMEDY SERIES STUDENT GOVERNMENT INTERNATIONAL COUNCIL SPECIAL INTEREST & HOBBIES COUNCIL ENGINEERING COUNCIL PEOPLE OF COLOR COUNCIL ACADEMIC COUNCIL STUDENT AFFAIRS SUB-BOARD INC/ GENERATION ADVOCACY WINTER GALA SPRING GALA CHILL OUT SPIRIT WEEK CARNIVAL

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