12 6 2012

VOICE the georgetown

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SCHOOL CONSOLIDATIONS AFFECT DC READS PAGE 4

RODGERS DROPS DOUBLE FIGURES PAGE 6

FUEGO COCINA HEATS IT UP PAGE 11

Georgetown University’s Weekly Newsmagazine Since 1969  December 6, 2012  Volume 48, Issue 1  georgetownvoice.com

2 the georgetown voice

december 6, 2012

letter to the editor

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Voice Crossword “December Themeless Challenge” by Tyler Pierce 26. 3.26 light-years 27. Banned insecticide 30. Nomad 31. Small root 34. Victorian, for one 35. Linda ___, Supergirl’s alias 36. Feminist 38. It might be cerebral 42. Take in 43. 360 degrees 46. Parenting challenges 47. Language of Zoroaster 48. Jubilant 50. Punishment of foot whipping 53. Chopin study 54. One who metes 55. Bush 56. Boris Godunov, for one 57. Herb at Good Stuff Eatery 58. Oozes ACROSS 1. Mac 6. Kind of support 10. Musical interval 14. They make them double stuff now 15. How you should take a shot

17. Branch, to a botanist 18. Leo’s breakfast options 19. Put on a pedestal 21. Experiment ingredient 22. Babakoto 23. Faults 24. 8^n 25. 8

puzzle answers at georgetownvoice.com 6. Chinese “way” 7. Professor in Gold and Silver version 8. Father 9. Most free from disease 10. Crappy alcohol 11. Board 12. Brouhaha 13. Lab work 16. Coquette 20. Saturday Night Fever music 23. Ballerina Margot 24. Girasol, e.g.

27. Debt-related document 28. Ready for a prom 29. Bakery buy 32. Carry away, in a way 33. Indefatigable 37. Have an inspiration?

38. Father 39. Heirloom location 40. Viney trees 41. Series of movements 43. Capital near Casablanca

44. Tracks 45. 10 kilogauss 49. Ball girls?

51. Canine 52. Bonanza find

DOWN 1. Ancient marketplaces 2. Get rid of 3. Early Peter, Paul and Mary song 4. French pilgrimage site 5. Aggressive one

ARE YOU A LOGOPHILE? Share your love of words and help us write crosswords.

Email crossword@georgetownvoice.com.

editorial

georgetownvoice.com

VOICE the georgetown

Volume 48.1 December 6, 2012 Editor-in-Chief: Keaton Hoffman Managing Editor: Gavin Bade Blog Editor: Connor Jones News Editor: Matt Weinmann Sports Editor: Steven Criss Feature Editor: Julia Tanaka Cover Editor: Neha Ghanshamdas Leisure Editor: Julia Lloyd-George Voices Editor: Sara Ainsworth Photo Editor: Miles Gavin Meng Design Editors: Amanda Dominguez, Madhuri Vairapandi Projects Editor: John Sapunor Puzzles Editor: Tyler Pierce Contributing Editors: Leigh Finnegan, Kevin Joseph Assistant Blog Editors: Isabel Echarte, Ryan Greene, Caitriona Pagni Assistant News Editors: Lucia He, Julia Jester, Jeffrey Lin Assistant Sports Editors: Chris Almeida, Chris Castano Assistant Cover Editor: Lauren Ashley Panawa Assistant Leisure Editors: Kirill Makarenko, Alex Golway Assistant Photo Editors: Tiffany Lachhonna, Andres Rengifo Assistant Design Editor: Teddy Schaffer

Staff Writers:

Rachel Calvert, Will Collins, Emlyn Crenshaw, Brendan Crowley, Alex Lau, Lindsay Leasor, Keith Levinsky, Claire McDaniel, Liana Mehring, Vanya Mehta, Joe Pollicino, Heather Regen, Cole Stangler, Melissa Sullivan, Ambika Tripathi, Cannon Warren

Staff Photographers:

Rebecca Anthony, Max Blodgett, Julian de la Paz, Matthew Fried, Kirill Makarenko, Tim Markatos, Tess O’Connor, Larissa Ong, Matt Thees

Staff Designer: Karen Bu Copy Chief: Morgan Manger Copy Editors:

Tori Jovanovski, Sonia Okolie, Dana Suekoff, Kim Tay, Suzanne Trivette

Editorial Board Chair: Patricia Cipollitti Editorial Board:

Aisha Babalakin, Gavin Bade, Nico Dona Dalle Rose, Keaton Hoffman, Julia Jester, Caitriona Pagni, Galen Weber

Head of Business: Aarohi Vora The Georgetown Voice

The Georgetown Voice is published every Thursday.

This newspaper was made possible in part with the support of Campus Progress, a project of the Center for American Progress,

online at CampusProgress.org. Campus Progress works to help young people — advocates, activists, journalists, artists — make their voices heard on issues that matter. Learn more at CampusProgress.org.

Mailing Address: Georgetown University The Georgetown Voice Box 571066 Washington, D.C. 20057

Office: Leavey Center Room 424 Georgetown University Washington, D.C. 20057

Email: editor@georgetownvoice.com Advertising: business@georgetownvoice.com Web Site: georgetownvoice.com The opinions expressed in the Georgetown Voice do not necessarily represent the views of the administration, faculty or students of Georgetown University, unless specifically stated. Unsigned editorials represent the views of the Editorial Board. Columns, advertisements, cartoons and opinion pieces do not necessarily reflect the views of the Editorial Board or the General Board of the Georgetown Voice. The University subscribes to the principle of responsible freedom of expression of its student editors. The Georgetown Voice is produced in the Georgetown Voice office and composed on Macintosh computers using the Adobe InDesign publishing system and is printed by Silver Communications. All materials copyright the Georgetown Voice. All rights reserved.

On this week’s cover: “Best of 2012” Cover Design: Neha Ghanshamdas (SFS ‘14)

the georgetown voice 3 LOJACK OFF

DPS needs to improve laptop protection

There’s been an unfortunate spike in crime at Georgetown this semester. This November, thefts alone increased 44 percent from October. The fact that the majority of these thefts have occurred in public places like the Leavey Center is particularly worrying, as is the fact that a third of the incidents were laptop thefts. Students understand the need to protect their valuable personal belongings, but generally fail to actively do so. Responding to the increase in thefts, the University’s Department of Public Safety has launched a campaign to encourage increased vigilance.

To date, DPS has chosen to concentrate on preventing laptop theft, tweeting messages to us like, “Never leave your laptop alone. Think of it as a child. Would you leave a child alone in a public place?” Whimsical yet stern, the tweet and other theft-prevention tips can be found on the DPS homepage, which students are encouraged to check often. Telling us not to leave our backpacks and laptops unattend-

ed is wonderful, but DPS should pay more attention to ensuring that laptops and other electrical equipment are returned to the owners. This semester, about 80 percent of laptop thefts have gone unresolved.

Instead, DPS chooses to focus on preventive measures, like public awareness campaigns, because they expend fewer resources than tracking down a reported theft. Even so, DPS ought to dedicate more of its energy to engage in more effective preventive measures.

The University of Michigan’s free personal electronics protection program, offered to all members of the campus community, could serve as a useful model for DPS’s prevention efforts. Registered members receive stickers to place visibly on their belongings, which serve as theft deterrents. Additionally, a unique registration number helps Michigan’s Department of Public Safety return stolen property in case of recovery.

Moreover, we would like to see more of DPS’s energy devoted to the resolution of theft cases post-facto. As part of their campaign, DPS is subsidizing LoJack, a recovery system operated by police to facilitate the tracking and recovery of stolen electrical equipment. LoJack for laptops sells at a yearly rate of $29.99, but DPS is offering it at a subsidized rate of $13.95. We commend DPS for providing this option, but would like to see them conduct a more compelling public campaign promoting this service.

Laptops, in particular, are central to our academic and social well-being. They hold priceless academic and personal records, and so when they are stolen, students suffer both a financial loss and a blow to their academic record. Owners of November’s stolen laptops may have been careless, but DPS should invest more energy and resources into both preventing theft and making sure each case is solved after the fact.

GET SCHOOLED

Reconsider District school consolidation Last month, D.C. Schools Chancellor Kaya Henderson announced her plan to close 20 traditional D.C. public schools before the beginning of the next school year. This plan is estimated to displace approximately 3,000 students across six of the city’s eight wards.

Henderson’s reasoning behind the closures is that a consolidation of schools will strengthen DCPS by redirecting funds from the maintenance of under-enrolled schools to the improvement of academic programs.

Due to a confluence of factors, including gentrification and the increased popularity of charter schools, many D.C. public schools have been left with fewer students and underutilized, decaying infrastructure. MacFarland Middle School in Petworth, for example, one of the two middle schools identified for closure, currently operates at one-third capacity.

While Henderson’s plan makes sense from an economic perspective, it fails to recognize the significant negative educational and social effects the school closures will have on students and families.

First of all, the detrimental effects of the closures will be concentrated in the District’s

most underprivileged areas. Henderson’s plan mostly affects elementary schools in the relatively less affluent Northeast and Southeast, and it will leave Ward 7 with only one middle school.

Unlike her predecessor Michelle Rhee, who left empty many of the 23 schools she closed in 2008, Chancellor Henderson plans to repurpose many of the closed schools into community centers. While this is commendable, closing 20 schools will nevertheless deprive each surrounding community of a locus of vibrant, healthy activity. Georgetown’s D.C. Reads program, for example, which works with three of the schools slated to be shut down, has cultivated meaningful relationships with the communities surrounding those schools. Taking away the positive influence radiated by local public schools will severely weaken these neighborhoods.

Chancellor Henderson has also expressed that schools which are not repurposed could be rented out to independently-run charter schools. Although this would keep school facilities within the District’s school system, it would perpetuate the un-

fortunate trend of exclusive charters replacing supposedly equal-opportunity traditional public schools. There is evidence that this pattern was exacerbated by the Rhee closures four years ago, which led to a loss of enrollment costing DCPS about $5 million in 2009. D.C. charter schools now enroll more than 40 percent of students, compared to 31 percent five years ago.

Critics of Henderson speculate the announced school closures would just serve to decrease enrollment in the long run. It is unclear whether or not this is realistic, given that Henderson has provided no estimates of how much money would be redirected as a result of the school closings. Unfortunately, no mention has been made about the employee layoffs that would accompany the closures, either.

Clearly, the District’s plan to close so many of its schools promises to leave students and communities significantly worse off. We understand the need to reconfigure the D.C. public education system, but we sincerely urge Chancellor Henderson to reconsider her approach.

CLIFFS, HILLS, CURBS

‘Fiscal cliff’ threatens student prospects As the U.S. edges closer to the sequestration stipulated in the Budget Control Act of 2011, debate is heating up between President Obama and the House Republican leadership about how to avoid the “fiscal cliff.” Originally conceived as a perverse incentive for Congress to agree on an acceptable debt-reduction solution, the Act stipulates an automatic spending reduction of up to $1.2 trillion of the federal budget on Jan. 1, 2013 if a budget compromise cannot be reached before that time.

While politicians on both sides of the aisle badger on about the need for a grand compromise of revenue increases and spending cuts, it is clear that any austerity deal that puts the overall health of the economy at risk is unacceptable for America’s college students.

Falling off the so-called “cliff” would unquestionably be a disaster. The U.S. Congressional Budget Office predicts that the automatic cuts would lead to a 0.5 percent

retraction in next year’s GDP, coupled with a corresponding spike in the unemployment rate to 9.1 percent. To avoid this calamity, a budget deal must be reached.

On Monday, the GOP proposed a predictably vague plan to reduce deficits by $2.2 trillion over the next decade, with roughly 36 percent of the savings coming from higher revenue due to closed loopholes in the tax code. The remaining 64 percent of deficit reduction would come from cuts in health programs, Social Security, and discretionary spending. Such a ratio disproportionately places the burden of austerity on the poor, leaving wealthy Americans—the benefactors of the GOP— to continue reaping the benefits of an income tax rate the U.S. can no longer afford to maintain.

While a fiscal cliff should rightly be avoided, the Republican plan is likely worse for college students and for America’s over-

all economic health. Although Speaker John Boehner’s (R-Ohio) proposal failed to name specific discretionary cuts, it would almost certainly include a deep cut in funding for Pell Grants, impacting an estimated 5.4 million students who rely on them nationally. Impeding a large swathe of Americans investing in education to improve their futures is not only unfair, but also bad economic policy.

Of course, the deficit does eventually need to be reined in. But now is not the time. Rates on U.S. government bonds are still remarkably low, so the U.S. can continue to fund its deficit in the short-term in order to ensure long-term growth. Without question, cuts in spending now mean slowing down the economy just as it begins to regain health. For students preparing to enter the workforce and for the nation as a whole, any bargain that threatens the recovery is no deal for America.

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december 6, 2012

Community concerned with D.C. school consolidation

by Lucia He On Nov. 13, D.C. Schools Chancellor Kaya Henderson announced a plan to shut down 20 schools in 19 buildings and six wards before the beginning of the next academic year. According to Henderson, some school districts have far more facilities than they need.

“Our buildings are wildly under-enrolled, our resources are stretched too thin and we’re not providing the complement of academic supports that our students and families deserve,” Henderson said in her announcement of the plan.

The relocation of up to 3,000 primary school students is expected to increase average enrollment by 12 percent, achieving an average facility utilization of 84 percent in each elementary school building.

Several groups, including parents, teachers, and volunteers, have shown concern on the impact this consolidation will have beyond the classroom.

“If you are simply shifting numbers, for the sake of shifting numbers without taking into consideration the way that you are literally uprooting communities by taking away a school where the community convenes, I think it’s completely irrational,” said DC Reads coordinator Elisa Manrique (COL ’14).

Currently, Georgetown students taking part in the DC Reads program, among other elementary schools, tutor at Davis, Smothers, and Kenilworth— three of the 20 schools that are projected to be shut down.

“These are all schools that we’ve built extremely close relationships with,” said Manrique. “We are not entirely understanding why some of the schools are being proposed for shutdown.”

One of the main concerns about the proposed plan is whether or not the consolidation of schools will improve the quality of the education offered to students.

“We looked at the proficiency levels of the schools that are closing compared to the proficiency levels of the feeder schools, and sometimes it just doesn’t make sense,” said Cat Skolnicki (COL ’13), also a coordinator for DC Reads.

“The students from Davis elementary, for instance, are going to be moved to C.W. Harris, where proficiency scores are at 15 percent, compared to a 38 percent proficiency at Davis,” Skolnicki said.

Another issue in the forefront of the dispute is the cultural shock involved in moving students from a familiar school into a new environment.

“Especially for schools like Kenilworth elementary, sending schools to Houston [Elementary] is going to be a very abrupt cultural shift,” Manrique said. “The communities, despite the fact that they are a five to 10- minute drive away, do not interact very much and have fairly different cultures.”

“There are historical rivalries between those two communities,” Skolnicki said. “Kids’ parents actually tell them, ‘don’t cross the train tracks,’ because in many cases they get beat up because of that rivalry.”

If the proposed changes were to occur, Manrique says the DC Reads program would have to shift its schedule and consider decreasing the number of students that they can hire. “If the school can’t physically have double the amount of tutors, then we can’t run that program as effectively,” she said.

Director of the DC Reads program Nathanial Roloff agrees. “Any new relationship is going to create challenges, because it requires a whole other setup,” he said. “We’re going to have to move site and move things around, so relationship building can be difficult.”

This is not the first time a DCPS policy has forced DC Reads to adapt its programming.

Earlier this year, DCPS cut the Out-of-School Time coordinator po-

Voice. “We want our beloved campus to be accurately and comprehensively reflected on the map for others to explore, and this MapUp helps us get closer to that goal. I can’t wait to see all the new additions that Georgetown students will make through Google Map Maker.”

The new additions to Google Maps will not only make traveling around Georgetown easier, but will also ease the transition into Georgetown for freshmen. Adding the building locations for places such as the GOCard Office should decrease the number of confused first-years and parents navigating the Hilltop.

Using Google Map Maker, students can add or remove locations on the online map to reflect the actual locations of iconic and obscure Georgetown buildings and businesses. Places that students added to the map range from the bioethics library to a restaurant that serves alcoholic milkshakes on 9th St. Gerson believes that the MapUp will complement stu-

dents’ experiences at Georgetown by providing them with accurate directions to all the fun locations in the area.

“Our biggest goal is to help make sure that Georgetown’s students have a consistent experience on both Google Maps and the reallife neighborhood that they enjoy each day,” wrote Gerson. “I was so excited to see all the additions to the map that Hoyas made, and once they’re updated in Google Maps, I can’t wait to benefit from all the changes next time I need to find my way around D.C.” Students have shared Gerson’s goal of preventing confusion, which might arise from smartphones giving incorrect directions to Tuscany’s on a Friday night.

“I think that it’s important that we have as much information as possible on Google Maps for Georgetown so that prospective students and parents can have as much information as necessary,” said Ellen Ebert (SFS’14). “I put the Bioethics Library on there, the Center for

sition, decreasing the number of coordinators from one in every school to one oversight coordinator for a group of three to four schools.

“Our program has been impacted by the significant budget cuts to the Office of the Out of School Time,” said Helen Conway (COL ’15), DC Reads tutor and Chair of the Advocacy Committee.

“Many of the wonderful OST coordinators, with whom we’ve developed great relationships, have left DCPS. New programs, such as The Fishing School, have offered their services to our schools and in some ways, we just can’t compete. We, as college students, can’t be at schools from 3 to 7 p.m. It’s just not possible.”

Even though there have been no concrete plans announced regarding what to do with abandoned buildings, there has been talk about replacing them with charter schools or community centers. But some feel that traditional public schools should be prioritized.

“Being the nation’s capital, we should have a general concern for the public services that we allow our communities, and if public schools are not one of our priorities, then there’s something wrong with our priorities,” said Manrique.

Dwayne Williams, consultant for the Urban Teaching Center and

the Center for Inspiring Teaching, also showed concerned about the potential increase in the number of charter schools.

“While competition is certainly great and important, there are a lot of questions about whether closing more traditional public schools and opening more charter schools is the best way to ensure that all students have consistently excellent education,” Williams said.

Until a final decision is made on Henderson’s plan, DC Reads members are finding ways to advocate against the measure.

“What we are trying to do right now is respond as advocates for our kids, we’re trying to do what we can to salvage what we can,” said Skolnicki. “We’re going to write to the Mayor and to Kaya [Henderson], and to testify for our families and our communities, before we think about what happens when they close.”

Mayor Vincent Gray will make the final decision on Henderson’s proposal in January, but until then DC Schools will continue its operations.

“We are committed to our schools, until we are no longer committed to our schools,” Roloff said. “When those schools will be officially closing, then we’ll start looking to moving our staff to other places.”

The Corp joins with Google to map Georgetown’s landmarks

by Jeffrey Lin

If you’re new to the Georgetown area or directionally challenged, you can now check out Google Maps to find all the classic Georgetown spots such as the Exorcist stairs or Tuscany’s Pizza.

Seeking to label the unmarked locations of Georgetown on Google Maps, The Corp and the Google Map Maker team have organized the first campus MapUp. The process of labeling locations on Google Maps begins with students searching for prominent places on the online map and labeling the location with as much detail as possible. Jason Gerson (COL’14), a Google Student Ambassador who organized the MapUp, hopes to prevent new and old Georgetown students from wandering aimlessly around the streets of Georgetown looking for Sweet Green.

“I am so excited to see Hoyas helping to enrich Google Maps’ information about our community,” Gerson wrote in an email to the

Andres Rengifo

Students look for holes in Google’s map of campus and the neighborhood.

Multicultural Equity and Access, and the GOCard Office.”

Most importantly, besides the free cake and the 10 percent discount Uncommon Grounds provided for students participating in the MapUp, students actually enjoyed adding locations on the map.

Although students spent more than an hour altering the

map, some Georgetown territory remains uncharted.Gerson plans to organize more MapUp events to add even more obscure Georgetown locations to the map.

“I hope this inaugural MapUp is the first of many to come—I cannot wait to see students across Georgetown feeling empowered

by Map Maker’s ability to enrich their community.”

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the georgetown voice 5

University begins initiative to improve campus technology

by Matthew Weinmann On Tuesday, Provost Robert Groves announced to the University community an $8 million investment in an initiative on technology enhanced learning aimed at three areas: faculty-designed classroom innovation, improving the information technology structure, and exploring ways to partner with other universities.

“Georgetown in a way has been working on things like this for many years,” Groves said. “We were poised to address how to take that work to a new level.” Georgetown’s position to start exploring new approaches combined with the sudden availability of new software capabilities made the initiative a timely move. “Those things sort of came together,” Groves said, “[The announcement] is saying to all of us the University is serious about this initiative. We’re making an investment.”

The investment is $8 million coming directly from the University’s budget. Grant proposals will fit into three categories along the lines of small, medium, and large. “It’s intended to be both broad and deep,” said Randy Bass, associate Provost

Groves announced the initiative in an email to the Georgetown community. and Director of the Center for New Designs in Learning and Scholarship. “We’re trying to go deeply in a few places, imagining what we will get out of those deeper projects are transferable innovations.”

Smaller proposals would focus on developing classroom technologies such as iClickers or Smart Boards, while some of the larger proposals aim at completely rethinking certain classes. “What comes out of those [larger proposals] is a substantial shift in how time is spent, where people are studying, how people are engaging the material,” Bass said. “I think what will look most different at the end of three to five years will be the introductory, lower division

Autonomy at all costs

Mayor Vincent Gray wasn’t crazy about the D.C. Council’s plan to use a referendum to secure budget autonomy for the District when it was first proposed, and it seems his antipathy towards Council Chair Phil Mendelson’s proposal has only grown over time.

On Tuesday, the Mayor sent a letter to Mendelson outlining his concerns with the bill, which was passed by the Council later that day and will allow voters to authorize changes to the Home Rule Charter in special elections set for April 23, 2013. With its expected passage, the referendum will amend the charter to give the District government autonomous control over the $4 billion it collects each year in local tax revenue. The changes will go into effect automatically unless Congress acts to block them—a long shot considering that the President would balk at signing any proposal to do so.

Gray’s biggest issue with the referendum is that it may violate federal law. “I am doubtful,” he

wrote, “that Congress has delegated the power to the District to convert unilaterally the role played by Congress and the President in the District’s budget from active participation to passive review.” He also expressed concern over what impact the bill would have on his negotiations with House Republicans to secure budget autonomy through congressional approval.

I’m no lawyer, but it seems the mayor has a point about the bill’s legality. Along with his letter, Gray attached a copy of a Washington Post op-ed written by Wayne Witkowski, a former D.C. Deputy Attorney General, and Leonard Becker, a former general counsel to Mayor Anthony A. Williams. They say that the Home Rule Charter includes language specifically intended to prevent what the Council is trying to do.

“Section 603(a),” they write, “states: ‘Nothing in this Act shall be construed as making any change in existing law, regulation, or basic procedure and practice’ regarding ‘the preparation,

UPi.CoM

part of the curriculum.”

It is still unclear how these changes would look, and some students are concerned with the unintended consequences. “I’m not sure how an intro Microeconomics class can really be changed so there are more interactions between students and the professor,” said Craig MacFarlane (SFS ‘15). “I’m afraid the only interaction that will increase will be between me and a TA.” The grant program is meant to be open to all departments and programs. “It is designed in a way that everybody has an equal shot,” Groves said. “It would be disappointing to me personally if we did a great set of innovations on [just] review, submission, examination, authorization and appropriation of the total budget of the District of Columbia government.’”

Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. If the era of Obamacare and Citizens United has taught us anything, it should be that the courts can surprise us with their interpretations of existing law.

Even so, it’s almost certain the charter amendments will face a court challenge down the road and it’s very possible they will be struck down.

City on a Hill

by Gavin Bade

A bi-weekly column about the District And so what? The District has little to lose from circumventing Congress with this proposal, and everything to gain. Gray is probably correct in assuming that the referendum will anger congressional Republicans by usurping their authority, but it’s not like Rep. Darrell Issa (R-Calif) and his Republican cohorts were doing us any favors anyway. It’s politically impossible for them to sign

one department or one program.

That would be sad.” Professors and department chairs are already expressing interest and discussing proposals.

A working group composed of faculty and students will determine which proposals get funding. “It will be primarily faculty vetting the proposals,” said Bass, “although we would certainly include students in the vetting process.” Groves seemed unsure how students were appointed to the working group. “GUSA and GSO [Graduate Student Organization] were probably involved in that,” said Groves.

Still, students will be an important part of the process. “We have a suspicion that students working with faculty on these grants for innovation might be a cool thing,” Groves said. “We’re encouraging proposals that would be collaborations between students and faculty.”

For enhancing the Georgetown’s network capacity, the focus will be on areas with high student use.

“There are other IT investments that are in the queue,” Groves said. “The investment we’re making from ITEL is not going to solve all the IT infrastructure; it’ll help us get to the level we think we need.”

on to any D.C. budget autonomy proposal without stipulations curtailing a woman’s right to choose, gun control, and funding for programs like needle exchanges—demands Gray rightly refuses to accept. With a deal in Congress not expected for years, our next best option is to opt out of that process.

What’s more, a high-profile legal battle over budget autonomy may be exactly what the District needs. Even if the charter amendments are struck down, D.C. can still win in the court of public opinion. Mayor Gray and the Council will have the opportunity to portray District residents (correctly) as the victims of a cruel accident of history—a people without control over their own tax dollars, whose laws and values are routinely trampled by lawmakers who do not represent them and refuse to negotiate unless they are allowed impose regressive policies.

In that narrative, Mendelson’s referendum is less a circumvention of Congress and more an attempt to win policymaking power almost all other governments

The consortium is perhaps the least far along in terms of design.

“We’re working on that. We’re talking and evaluating really aggressively,” Groves said. “We’re quite hopeful that announcement could be made soon.” The partnerships would be aimed at enhancing the mix of learning techniques across campus and increasing Georgetown’s tools, including the potential for massive online courses.

This potential comes with risks.

The possibilities “require careful discussion, debate, about what kind of course offering we would offer in that space,” Groves said. “Is there a danger? Yes, [but] you avoid the danger through leadership and dialogue among the faculty about what’s true to our mission.”

Groves is quick to assert that despite changes in technology, the student experience will always be important at Georgetown. “We’ve made the decision there will be a Georgetown here 100 years from now where students will come and interact with faculty regardless of what technology is,” Groves said.

“We think we are at the beginning of learning how to use new technology in ways that apply to all departments, and we’d love to test that.”

enjoy. D.C. becomes the archetype of an oppressed minority, shut out of the democratic system by antiquated laws and powerful far-off interests preserving the status quo for their own political aims despite the popular will.

That’s a storyline capable of winning support not only for budget autonomy, but for bigger causes like statehood as well.

Mayor Gray needs to face the facts. It’s up to the city and no one else to make budget autonomy a reality. By approving such a bold proposal, they have taken responsibility not only for the legal risks, but also for their constituents’ best interest. As we move closer to April 23, Gray will need to reconcile his apprehension with the potential of this referendum. As he does he would do well to keep Henry David Thoreau’s words in mind: “If the machine of government is of such a nature that it requires you to be the agent of injustice to another, then, I say, break the law.”

Think the district is getting too big for its britches? Tell Gavin at gbade@georgetownvoice.com

sports

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december 6, 2012

Hoya women’s basketball nets two on the road

by Brendan Crowley Coming off of a close victory over La Salle University (1-7) last week, the Hoya women’s basketball team (6-2) looked to continue their winning ways, squaring off in two road games versus cross-town rival George Washington University (4-3) and Monmouth University (2-5).

A slow start by the Blue and Gray in their matchup against George Washington allowed the Colonials to jump out to an early 10-point lead. But with a few minutes left in the first half, a furious run by the Hoyas knotted the game up at 33, a tie the two teams would take into the break.

Sluggish starts, like their first half versus George Washington, have become a troubling recurrence for Georgetown this season, a point Head Coach Keith Brown has sought to correct.

“We make bad decisions in the beginning of the game,” Brown said. “I just had a conversation with them…I said, ‘Why do I have to take y’all in the back and remind you what I told you before the game started?’ Typical kids, they said, ‘I don’t know.’ But hopefully if we start making better decisions, we’ll have better starts.”

The second half proved a stark contrast to the first for the Hoyas. Led by dominant play from captains Sugar Rodgers and Andrea White, the Hoyas opened the half on a 19 to 4 run and never looked back, extending the lead to over 20 points and eventually prevailing 70-54.

Rodgers, a senior shooting guard and this week’s Big East Conference Player of the Week, dominated the stat sheet, scoring 22 points along with eight rebounds, six steals, and four assists. Junior forward White was also impressive, contributing

15 points of her own, as well as five rebounds and four assists.

An additional 11 points from junior guard Samisha Powell and 10 from senior center Sydney Wilson meant that four Hoyas achieved double figures for the first time this season.

The play of White, in particular, has caught the attention of fans and coaches alike. Recognized on the team as the number-two scoring option behind Rodgers, White has thrived in her role, averaging 12.3 points and five rebounds per game on the season.

“Andrea is a monster, man,” Coach Brown said. “ I think in the beginning of the season, when I spoke to you guys, I told you that I thought she would have the breakout season. Andrea can do a lot of things…

If she’s healthy, I think she’s going to have an outstanding season…She can do everything and she’s been playing like it.”

White credits her recent success to her ability to focus on specific aspects of the game while on the court.

“One of my main focuses right now is rebounding,” White said. “I know I have to do everything to help this team win.”

White also talked about the development of some of the younger players on the team, which has been a promising sign for the Hoyas depth as they approach Big East Conference play.

“Samisha has really stepped up a lot,” White said.

“Just even her demeanor on the court, controlling the team.

And Vanessa [Moore] has been doing a great job stepping in and playing a different position. The freshmen, they’re learning everyday, just getting better. They look up to us and we have to set an example.”

In Tuesday’s contest versus Monmouth, the Hoyas prevailed

ABBY GREENE

Sugar Rodgers joined three other teammates this weekend with double figures.

61-48, extending their now season-long winning streak to three games. Georgetown was anchored by another prolific scoring effort from Rodgers, who led all scorers with 30 points.

The Hoyas went back and forth with the Hawks during the first half and entered the locker room leading by only

one point. But after starting slow in the second half, the Hoyas were eventually able to extend their lead into double digits late in the game.

Next up for the Hoyas is a tough test at Big Ten powerhouse Penn State University (61) on Dec. 9. The No. 10 Nittany Lions will be the Hoyas’ biggest

challenge thus far, with an impressive average of 77.3 points scored per contest. The Hoyas will need to come out strong from the opening minute in University Park, Pa. in order to take down Penn State. Tip-off is slated for Sunday at noon with the game broadcast on the Big Ten Network.

the Sports Sermon “I’ll kick everybody’s ass in this locker room if it doesn’t happen... Dwight has it in him as well. Even though he smiles a lot, he cares a lot about this.” - Kobe Bryant on the Lakers’ struggle to improve another one of those non-revenue programs that suffer from this commercial structure year after year. And so with most of their minimal revenue being spent on sustaining activities such as travel and equipment and not publicity, these teams quickly become an afterthought for students.

The lack of interest doesn’t just stop with sailing though.

Georgetown women’s cross country won the NCAA National Championship last year, and other than a few hints of interest ,the notoriety faded and failed to carry over into this year’s season.

This team, as with sailing, earned every bit of their National Championship, but still Georgetown as a whole disregarded the success without much hesitation.

ping the fences surrounding the field last week in the quarterfinal.

It would be exceedingly diffiWith their convincing win cult to find something on Georgeover the University of San Diego town’s campus that is more comlast Saturday, men’s soccer thrust mon knowledge than our 1984 itself into the Final Four and into NCAA Basketball championship. program history. Never has a Maybe President Bill Clinton’s Georgetown soccer team made it status as an alumnus or the name this close to winning the College of our bulldog mascot rival the Cup and students are eating it up.

1984 season’s notoriety, but that The excitement surrounding a only belies the fact that basketball team that only had two televised season is considered nothing less games this year brings some hope than sacred. That year, legendary that maybe this time success will Coach John Thompson Jr. led Patstick. The stands up on North rick Ewing and the Hoyas to colKehoe Field were brimming with lege hoops immortality and this shouting Hoya fans and the stucampus will never forget it. With dent section would not be denied the Final Four run in 2007 and after the final seconds passed as several competitive seasons since, they rushed the field and creHoya basketball has established ated a massive, jumping huddle itself as a staple in the culture of around the players.

Georgetown. Ask any Soccer winning Pete Rose Central group of Georgetown the NCAA National Da bettin’ line students which athChampionship letic program has the could do much more Dookies Margin Hoyas most top finishes and than simply add an(underdogs) (duh!) of course they will (favorites) other top finish in quickly answer “basthe Georgetown reMcElroy Divinity Tebow ketball.” Well, they cord books. It could Heat would be wrong.

Winning tradition broaden the range Wizards Instead, that title of attention paid to Hornets What?

Pelicans should belong to the sports programs. sailing team, which won its eighth Bringing attention to these Although they still have to get national championship last spring non-revenue sports teams has through Maryland, it is definitely in Austin, Texas. To say that our proved to be a daunting task. possible for this talented group sailing team is dominant in their With the University only able to that has already withstood a rigorfield of athletics is an understate- heavily promote the one team that ous Big East schedule. ment. But at a school so bent on brings in the big bucks and stuThe most important consuccess and prestige, why isn’t a dents paying all their attention to sequence of the men’s soccer team that has won eight national the flashy, mega-hyped nature of team’s victories is that they shed championships since 2001 put on NCAA men’s basketball, it is hard light on the world that exists a pedestal and lauded over like to discern what must be done to outside of basketball. The real the basketball team? Regrettably, make a change. test will come next year when as in many other cases, it comes What Georgetown really the soccer season rolls around down to money. needs is an athletic team capable again. If this year’s run has Ideally, the University could of bridging the gap between non- bridged the commercial gap, allocate funds for promotion of revenue sports and recognition by students will turn out to support sports programs based on their Hoya fans. One team looks to be men’s soccer with the excitesuccess. This way at least when a doing just that, and for that reason ment that only basketball has team is doing well and should be men’s soccer has taken on more captured. 1984 was a long time making Hoyas proud, students than just an attempt at a national ago and it is time for us to start would actually know about it. title. Georgetown soccer does not cheering on Hoyas in each of our Unfortunately, very few other receive national commercial at- sports. Two wins in Alabama college sports receive the com- tention, yet the team sold out its could go a long way in making mercial popularity that basketball stands, overfilled its student sec- this increased support and atenjoys. The sailing team is just tion, and had countless fans grip- tention a lasting quality.

by Steven Criss

sports

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the georgetown voice 7

Men’s soccer heads to first College Cup Track makes strides at Navy

by Chris Castano With their win last Saturday against the University of San Diego (14-9-0) in the quarterfinals of the NCAA tournament, the 2012 Georgetown men’s soccer team (193-2) has written themselves into the Georgetown sports lore. All that remains is their trip to Alabama for their first NCAA College Cup. Although the Hoyas have never ventured this deep into the postseason before, Head Coach Brian Wiese believes their arduous regular season schedule has prepared them for the challenges of the playoffs.

“This is the advantage of playing in the Big East,” said Wiese. “If we weren’t in this conference, you might see a group that is thinking about what it’s getting into. The funny thing is, despite being the first soccer team to go to a College Cup, this group feels about as seasoned as seasoned can be.”

The team’s maturity showed early in the game against USD and continued throughout. Neither team was able to clearly grasp momentum

in the opening stages of the match, but the Hoya underclassmen made their presence known. Freshman forward Brandon Allen and freshman midfielder Cole Seiler both put in admirable performances from the kickoff. Allen created a few opportunities, while Seiler made key interceptions to deny the Toreros several shots on goal.

The half ended scoreless as both Georgetown and USD fought back and forth to break the deadlock. With the number of chances being created, it was completely reasonable that fans expected a few goals in the match. The Hoyas would not disappoint.

After USD scored the game’s first goal, the Hoyas immediately responded with the equalizer. From there the game belonged to Georgetown as they began to settle into their rhythm. Senior forward Andy Reimer put the game out of reach with his effort in the 88th minute of the second half. Reimer’s initial shot bounced off the post but would find its way back to his foot. He then chipped the ball over both a defend-

Steve Neumann provides key aggressive play on the offensive end.

GAVIN MENG

Belcher suicide raises alarm

For the typical American sports fan, waking up on an autumn Sunday means one thing: football. The thought of skipping it and missing any of the action, especially in our fantasy sports-driven culture, is almost unheard of. Imagine waking up one Sunday and having to actually interact with people.

Perhaps it’s a reality we will have to face decades down the road, of course. It’s obviously not for a lack of popularity, as the NFL is the most popular sports league around—attendance, television ratings, you name it. It stops becoming a game, though, when general well-being is put at risk.

This past weekend’s tragic events put that in a sobering light.

Chiefs linebacker Jovan Belcher murdered his girlfriend before killing himself at Kansas City’s practice facility a few hours later.

In a vacuum, this would seem like an isolated incident. It would seem to be a player’s sanity gone awry and not reflective of the NFL as a whole. That’s obviously true,

as this tragedy had a lot to do with Belcher’s emotional distress. But I cannot seem to shake the notion that a great deal of blame has to be put on the game of football.

There are reports that Belcher suffered head injuries, just like any other NFL player. It is entirely possible that countless concussions over the span of his short NFL career led to exacerbated mental problems, which we now know he dealt with. Even with counseling, multiple head injuries may have done something to Belcher’s thinking that led to his actions.

Just to be clear, this is not meant to exonerate Belcher in any way, shape, or form—not even close.

Killing his girlfriend and leaving his infant daughter orphaned is an unspeakable crime. Still, it raises the question of whether a gladiatorial sport like the NFL had something to do with it. It’s probably the first time something along these lines has occurred, but with mounting head injuries we cannot be quite certain it is the last.

er and the keeper to put the final nail in the coffin.

Reimer later said, “I thought it was going to hit the post and go in so I was going to follow it into the goal. Luckily it bounced right back to me and I decided to just finish it.

When that happens, you can’t really think of anything. I just let my instincts take over and tried to keep as calm as possible.”

As the game finished 3-1 in favor of Georgetown, the attention of the Hoya coaching staff shifted over to College Park, Md. where the University of Maryland (20-1-2) and the University of Louisville (14-5-1) were playing to decide who would meet the Hoyas in the Cup. Maryland had appeared in 11 College Cups before their game against Louisville. This particular match held special significance for UMD, as it was the Cardinals who ended the Terps’ 2011 postseason run. Maryland put three goals on the board to get the win and advance to their 12th College Cup. The Terps and the Hoyas are slated to meet on the pitch in Hoover, Ala. this Friday at 5:00 p.m. The last time the Terps faced the Hoyas in competitive play, they edged out the Hoyas 2-1.

Junior forward Steve Neumann echoed his coach’s confidence when asked about Maryland. “They’ve gotten a lot of press this year being one of the top five teams in the nation,” he said. “They’re obviously talented, they’re deep, they’re athletic. It’ll be another good test for us, but I think our Big East play has definitely prepared us for this.”

I hope they are able to determine if there was some brain damage that took Belcher over the top.

It would certainly be a damning conclusion for a league that claims to put player safety at the forefront.

They have certainly taken measures in that regard: increasingly stringent rules on unnecessary hits and rigid concussion guidelines after any reported head injury just two among them.

Double-Teamed

by Kevin Joseph A bi-weekly column about sports

But while they stand as great safety initiatives on the NFL’s part, there is no denying the hypocrisy that underlies it. For Roger Goodell and his league, it’s all about the money—always has been and always will be, unless these safety concerns continue to grow over time. After the Belcher murder-suicide, playing a football game the next day was a ridiculous decision for the NFL.

by Chris Almeida The track and field season kicked off last weekend when the men’s team traveled to Annapolis, Md. to participate in the Navy Invitational. This was the first meet of the indoor season, which runs until the beginning of March.

The Hoyas had a strong showing, with four first place finishes in the meet. Senior Bobby Peavey won the 5,000 meters with a time of 14:23.30.

Derek Armstrong finished sixth in the race, running a 14:41.40, good enough to qualify for the Intercollegiate Association of Amateur Athletes of America championships, one of the national meets held after the Big East Tournament in May. After getting the last remaining qualifying spot for the final, sophomore Tyler Smith won the 60-meter dash in a time of 7.05. Junior Michael Reher and Freshman Andrew Ogle finished first and second respectively in the 1,500 meters. Junior Eghosa Aghayere won the long jump with an IC4A qualifying mark of 14.78 meters. Aghayere was the only Hoya to compete in the field events at the meet.

In the 200-meter dash, freshmen Mike Andre and Devante Washington finished second and third respectively.

Andre finished in a time of 22.28, only eight hundredths

Hell, take a look at the Chiefs’ sentiments after the game. Sure, they won, but their attitudes reflected one of just getting through the game. There was no motivation present; it’s pretty ludicrous notion to rally behind a murderer, even if he is a fallen teammate.

The NFL’s revenue-hungry model doesn’t stop there. Take Thursday night games as a prime example. One scheduling faux pas had the Ravens playing four games in 18 days.

This results in a muddied product, if we are to look purely at the results. The Thursday night games consist of two lethargic, exhausted teams trying to somehow push through and get a win, while fans and team management hold their breath hoping to avoid some major injury to their star players.

The beating an NFL player takes in one game is incalculable, so for Goodell to force them to stunt their recovery time by three days is pretty unfair.

As if that wasn’t enough, the league has flirted with expanding

of a second out of the top spot. Another top-three finish came from junior Hansel Akers, who finished third in the 400-meter dash.

The Hoyas also ran well in the relay events, finishing second in the 4x800-meter relay. Akers, Andre, Washington, and sophomore Richard D’Ambrosio came third out of 16 competing teams in the 4x400-meter relay.

The men’s team will have a month off before they travel to Fairfax, Va. on Jan. 5 for the Father Diamond Invitational, hosted by George Mason University. The women’s team will also travel to Fairfax for their first meet after a strong crosscountry season. With eight topthree individual finishes in total, as well as three relay teams landing in the top three of their respective races, the men’s half proved that they have grown significantly since last year’s indoor season.

The track and field season commences outdoor activity after the indoor season’s conclusion. The entire season comes to a close in late June with the U.S. Track and Field Championships in Des Moines, Iowa following the NCAA Championships in Eugene, Ore. The Hoyas hope to continue to extend this form, which is already a large improvement from their performance in last year’s Navy Invitational.

the schedule for some time now, adding an extra game or two with the sole purpose of increasing their already bloated budgetary bottom line. For players, it would just mean an extra weekend or two of taking that constant pounding. So much for player safety.

Maybe it doesn’t matter. For all the devastating head injuries we plainly witness on Sundays, there are plenty more that players, to a startling degree, tend to shake off.

“Be in the hundreds,” Hall of Famer Jack Youngblood told the New York Post of his head injuries.

“If I didn’t have a concussion every football game, you weren’t playing very hard.”

Perhaps there is some apocalyptic end for the NFL coming, at least as the system exists now. Or, maybe the NFL is just too big of a monster to fail, even with mounting concerns over concussions. Either way, it’s tragic that we needed Jovan Belcher to bring the issue back to the forefront.

Give Kevin a head injury at kjoseph@georgetownvoice.com

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8 the georgetown voice

1. Moonrise Kingdom

Wes Anderson is somewhat of a polarizing figure in cinema, producing a cult following on one side and drawing biting criticism for his “twee” style on the other. With Moonrise Kingdom, however, any backlash becomes impossible in the face of the director ’s best work since the Oscar-nominated The Royal Tenenbaums.. Following the story Tenenbaums of two misunderstood tweens who fall in love and run away together on a 1960s New England island, Moonrise Kingdom vividly encapsulates a sense of nostalgic innocence as the two struggle to come to terms with their budding romance. As Sam and Suzy attempt to flee the hoard of jaded adults and a “Khaki Scout” troop

in hot pursuit, their own route to self-discovery becomes easier to discern amid the ensuing chaos. Anderson steers clear of clichés, however, implementing his trademark humor to make every line drop with dry perfection. With Bill Murray, Bruce Willis, and a particularly fantastic Ed Norton also on screen, it’s impossible not to recognize the sheer amount of acting talent present. These adults on the fringe of the romantic story never distract from the central narrative, though, which is all about two children determined to create their own world as an alternative to dull reality. Tempered by a light-hearted air, it’s the best kind of escapism.

-Julia Lloyd-George

Movies

2. Argo

Hollywood takes on the Iranian Hostage Crisis in this rare gem of a historical, action-packed thriller.

Based on a recently declassified CIA operation that is just crazy enough to be true, Argo tells the story of the six American Iranian Embassy workers who must be rescued from Iran after they manage to escape before the embassy is overtaken. While casting oneself as the lead isn’t always advisable when directing a film, Ben Affleck never falters, giving an astounding performance as the CIA operative ballsy enough to devise and go through with the improbable scheme to disguise the six Americans as a Canadian film crew on location. Argo’s winning story might just restore your faith in America’s leave no man behind mantra.

- Mary Borowiec

december 6, 2012

3. Beasts of the Southern Wild

It’s rare that a Sundance breakout receives any national attention, much less the outpouring of critical praise that this glorious debut from filmmaker Benh Zeitlin has garnered. With a soaring score and imagery nothing short of breathtaking, Beasts of the Southern Wild is a true testament to the power of cinema. Driven by the narrative of a girl living in the bayous of southern Louisiana, this work of magical realism manages to unleash an entire world in her young imagination. As a storm threatens her tight-knit community, Hushpuppy (Quvenzhané Wallis) becomes an inimitable force against all obstacles. Much like the film she anchors, her size belies her tremendous spirit.

-Julia Lloyd-George

4. Skyfall

After 2008’s Quantum of Solace left Bond lovers wondering if they would ever again see a movie worthy of the title, Bond is definitely back. Skyfall goes back to 007’s roots, with a classic Aston Martin, the return of Q, and an unhinged villain with a serious axe to grind.

Even as it shows Bond’s age, Daniel Craig’s performance only builds upon the grittier Bond introduced in 2006’s Casino Royale. Although the final fight scene seems more an ending to a trilogy than the beginning of another two films with the steely-eyed Craig, if the next two continue with this winning mix of new and old, Craig will be the new Connery.

-Matt Weinmann

5. The Perks of Being a Wallflower

The Perks of Being a Wallflower is a story of firsts: kisses, girlfriends, pot brownies, LSD, fist fights, loves, all amidst the struggle of trying to find one’s place in the impossibility that is growing up. Stephen Chobsky’s autobiographical best selling book-turned-movie charms in its film adaptation, as Charlie (Logan Lerman), Sam (Emma Watson) and Patrick (Ezra Miller) effortlessly come together as Charlie becomes a fixture in their clan of misfits. Filled with enough drama for any teen soap, Perks still manages to ring true. Nostalgia and a stellar soundtrack make this a coming of age for the ages.

- Mary Borowiec

The Voice staff has spoken ...

the best of 10. The Lumineers, The Lumineers

On the Lumineers’ eponymous debut album, singer Wesley Schulz proclaims, “classy girls don’t kiss in bars, you fool.” While questionable if coming from a different source, Schulz’s vocals—the focus of this Denver folk rock band’s repertoire—are emotive and effortlessly entrancing. That voice, along with strummy guitars and bouncy pianos, take the listeners on a journey never boring or repetitive. From the chanty, anthemic “Ho Hey” to the decidedly more angsty “Slow It Down,” to album closer “Morning Song,” which manages to be elegiac and triumphant all at the same time, The Lumineers is a fitting intro to a band we won’t be forgetting.

-Leigh Finnegan

9. Dirty Projectors, Swing Lo Magellan

Swing Lo Magellan¸ Magellan¸ the Dirty Projectors’ most user-friendly album to date, is a sweet little collection of music. Without sacrificing their idiosyncratic female backers, abnormal time signatures, or abstract lyrics, the Projectors showed an unprecedented level of discipline with their seventh album. This tamed-down approach to music pulls the melodies, not the style, to the forefront of the songs, a critically and commercially auspicious shift.

Swing Lo Magellan’s forceful, swelling vocals (“Gun Has No Trigger”) and mellifluous respites (“Dance for You”) present a comprehensive palette of moods—the signal of a band growing into itself.

-John Sapunor

8. Mackelmore, The Heist

“Thrift Shop,” the single that sent Mackelmore’s album to the top of the charts, does little justice to the rapper’s work. The Heist as a whole is a testament to the raw power of social consciousness and a soul laid bare that would have been avoided at all cost by any other rapper. Chronicling experiences on this autobiographical album that range from a recent relapse in “Starting Over,” to the abuse of struggling artists by record labels on “Jimmy Iovine,” to the idealized concept of wealth on “Gold,”—and all over diverse beats and seamless samples— Macklemore crafts the perfect, self-aware LP. -Kirill Makarenko

7. The Beach House, Bloom

It’s hard to pin down Beach House’s dreamy fourth album Bloom.. Those who try inevitably Bloom end up just humming along as the album’s gentle melodic waves lap over their consciousnesses. The entire album translates as one unbroken ride looking through some nebular chasm into a sweet, but melancholic universe. While this feeling overwhelms the album, notable tracks, including “Myth,” “Troublemaker,” and “Other People,” showcase stronger melodies that break free from the dominating ethereal wave that is Bloom Bloom.. The silent last two minutes provide time to reflect on what the hell just punched you straight to bed and then further on why silence closes the album.

-Cannon Warren

6. The xx, Coexist

The xx’s eponymous first album was good, but they really stepped up their game on Coexist. Whether you want to call it indie or dream pop, the xx’s sound is better described by metaphor than a single genre.

Imagine an infinite black space and the softest, hushed vocals inside. Each strum of the guitar brings stars to sight, but they fade away into space as the chords die away. The beat of the drum is in time to the heart that yearns. Simple but poignant, the album is about fading love. It’s sexy, it’s sad, but mostly, Coexist resonates with that deep, dark place in your soul.

- Madhuri Vairapandi

5. Passion Pit, Gossamer

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Though typically characterized as an indie rock band, Passion Pit has distinguished itself enough not to be constrained within the confines of any particular genre, a fact made clear on its latest release. It’s easy to ignore the somber lyrics under the irresistibly catchy layers of sugary electronica, yet the repressed emotion and anxiety beneath the surface bring out another side to the band.

In a current music scene dominated by a deconstructed aesthetic, Passion Pit’s maximalist tendencies to build their music with multiple layers and unleash emotions with no holds barred make for a refreshing change.

Though Gossamer is named after a sheer and silken fabric, there’s much more to it than an airy aura.

- Julia Lloyd-George

6. Limcoln

In many ways, Lincoln is an improbable movie—a major blockbuster about little more than legislative infighting in which second-choice lead Daniel Day Lewis turns in a performance so convincing critics are already poised to hand him an Oscar. But Lincoln is the perfect film for the times. For a divided nation, it is a story of compromise, with a flawed but wellintentioned leader (Obama?) taking a realpolitik approach to governance, battling to pass the 13th Amendment. The political press has been abuzz since, but no matter the film’s ideology, it will be remembered not only as a standout of 2012, but of this era of American governance.

-Gavin Bade

7. The Masters

The luminous opening shots of the blue sea in 70mm are reason enough to marvel at Paul Thomas Anderson’s latest epic The Master.

Master.

Complementing the novelty in cinematography, Joaquin Phoenix and Philip Seymour Hoffman give striking performances in a story that is as dense as it is unsettling.

Set in post-WWII America, the story takes place in a modernist abyss where cults and metaphysical perplexities challenge notions of bestiality and existence. One of the few standout films this year, The Master leaves the audience alienated and confounded with its story of striving and struggle— if not for its enigmatic plot, the mise-en-scéne marks this film’s magnitude.

-Katherine Propper

the georgetown voice 9

8. 21 Jump Street

9. Looper

2012 was the year of the predictable movie reboot—Spiderman, again? But Phil Lord and Chris Miller ’s film adaptation of the ‘80s TV series 21 Jump Street was surprising in all the right ways. A not-so-fat Jonah Hill and the year ’s sexiest man alive Channing Tatum join forces to take down synthetic drug dealers at a local high school in a film that treads the line between Breakfast Club nostalgia and Hangover off-thewall hilarity. Awkward teen hipster romance, wild party scenes, Korean Jesus, Peter Pan tights, and a Johnny Depp prom cameo combine in easily the funniest, if not the most original, movie of 2012.

-Keaton Hoffman

Once you get over the whole time-travelling assassin thing, Looper is ultimately a love story. Within the sci-fi dystopia of the U.S. circa 2044, writer and director Rian Johnson draws on the dichotomy between rural innocence and urban decay to create a world where the only thing that can conquer vice is self-sacrifice.

Emily Blunt gives the performance of her career as a mother raising a future mob monster while Joseph Gordon-Levitt fits well into the younger Bruce Willis role (though the CGI face helped). Looper ‘s appeal lies in the details of its futuristic landscape, but its brilliance is in its thematic simplicity.

-Keaton Hoffman

2012 4. Mumford and Sons, Babel

Stunning music executives with sales rivaling those of Adele, British import Mumford and Sons amped up their trademark folksy sound with the release of their sophomore album, Babel. The album boasts punchier tracks that mix up Marcus Mumford’s usually subdued vocals; more dramatic melodies interspersed with band cheers give the album a live feeling. Babel also abounds with religious themes and imagery, both in biblical quotes and more subtle allusions, providing an intriguing devotional quality that complicates classic love themes. Balancing experimentation with their tried and true folksy sound, Mumford and Sons signals another British Invasion.

- Mary Borowiec

3. Purity Ring, Shrines

Electronic music duo, Purity Ring released “Ungirthed” in early 2011. It was the kind of song you could not ignore—a well-constructed pop song, with elements stolen from all over the world of popular music, from southern rap to glitchhop, and it was catchy as hell. Their presence in the music scene was largely mysterious until they released their album Shrines earlier this year, and by that time they had an audience practically begging them for more. The album reiterates everything the Canadian pair did right on the single—glitch-ridden vocals, incredibly catchy lines, and a pastiche of pop culture so complete it could be used to teach a music history class about the last decade.

-David Greek

10. Brave

Brave might surprise you.

A princess story without a love interest? Shocking, yet satisfying. The Pixar tale weaves together feuding clans, magic run amok, and triplets that have never looked cuter than their ursine forms to make a mostly fun, though incredibly safe, feel-good movie. With an air of Robin Hood gone Scottish, and a dysfunctional family to rival any TV sitcom, the feisty Princess Merida spends the length of the film trying to tame her crazy hair and avoiding an arranged marriage in a plot line that leaves something to be desired.

Still, if you have ever thought that “Whip My Hair” would be much better if it took place in medieval Scotland, then Brave is for you.

-Claire McDaniel

Albums

2. Frank Ocean, channel ORANGE

Many people saw Frank Ocean’s debut LP as a departure from traditional R&B—the Long Beach-native shattering hip hop conventions with a nearly 10-minute long single, lethargic dubstep-inspired sampling, and taboo homoerotic themes. And yet channel ORANGE offers the most traditional approach to the genre of the year, tackling sexual frustration, societal decay, and class boundaries with a purity and honesty rare in contemporary R&B music. But beneath the angst-ridden interludes and scratchy under-produced falsettos of channel ORANGE, Ocean crafts a complete album that is so much more than rhythm and blues: it’s a memoir, and it’s beautiful.

-Keaton Hoffman

1. Kendrick Lamar

The cover of Kendrick Lamar ’s good kid, m.A.A.d city shows “baby Kendrick” surrounded by 40s of malt liquor and family members. It’s the environment Kendrick grew up in—a father with Chicago gang ties, the notorious setting of Compton. Yet, avoiding the ragsto-riches mindset, as with Young Jeezy and an obvious interpretation of the cover, Kendrick is a supremely self-aware rapper in conflict with a young, testosterone-fueled mind. In the track “Poetic Justice,” “Every second, every minute, man I swear that

she can get it” is countered by the question that captures the entire album: “If I told you a flower bloomed in a dark room, would you trust it?” Kendrick’s masterful acceptance of his lower-class origins comes over low beats and atmospheric notes reminiscent of early Outkast, yet he replaces southern twang with eerie starkness. Labeled a “short film” by Kendrick, good kid features dense lyrical close-ups and humorous skits over real hip hop production. It even offers a small list of hand-picked extras. The album falls just short of an Oscar.

-Will Collins

leisure

10 the georgetown voice

december 6, 2012

Keep away from Playing for Keeps: A romcom gone wrong

by Mary Borowiec At first glance, Playing for Keeps seems to have all the substance required of a winning romcom; the story of a hot former soccer star with a Scottish accent (Gerard Butler) who is trying to do right by his son and ex-wife (Jessica Biel), while clichéd, at the very least offers a few hours of mindless entertainment.

But while Playing for Keeps has potential as a romantic comedy—a genre that comedienne Mindy Kaling accurately coined “a subgenre of sci-fi, in which the world operates according to different rules than my regular human world”—the flick undoubtedly fails in both substance and charm. A grand trifecta of poor acting, painful storylines, and shallow characters doom the film from the outset.

The story revolves around George, a former soccer cham-

pion, as he tries to prove to both his ex-wife and himself that he has matured since his self-centered glory days.

Moving to be closer to his son, George ends up coaching his son’s soccer team only to be barraged by a bevy of shamelessly flirty soccer moms—children in tow—with the town’s most eligible bachelor. The inane story arc only spirals further downward from there as George struggles to overcome the challenges that invariably come with having chiseled features and a husky accent. Only more ridiculous than his female following is one of the soccer dads (Dennis Quaid), who throws around money to make sure his son is favored on the team, befriending George only to later beg to be bailed out of jail after getting in a bar fight.

He’s a feeble stock figure at most, adding little in this unbearably trite narrative.

While romcoms typically fall in Kaling’s accurate “subgenre of sci-fi,” Playing for Keeps combines the worst of an

are practically requirements in these formulaic films—Playing for Keeps takes its portrayal of women (specifically, the crazed

IMDB

“Alright, kid, let me tell you about something I call the birds and the bees.”

improbable story with a superficial cast of characters. Moreover, though traditional gender roles are more or less a given in romcoms—masculine romantic gestures and the happy ending

suburban soccer mom) to an all time low.

The three leading moms (Catherine Zeta-Jones, Uma Thurman, and Judy Greer) bicker between each other

while embodying the worst of female stereotypes: Zeta-Jones the vixen and grand manipulator, Thurman the depraved wife, and Greer the insecure follower. Together, the women create a ridiculous portrait of middle class motherhood countered only by the bland female lead: Stacie, played by Jessica Biel. Stacie’s lack of multidimensionality is unfortunately coupled with Biel’s lifeless performance—a lethal combination that makes the supposedly central love story between Biel and Butler fall flat.

Even when considered within the flexible parameters of its genre, Playing for Keeps is nothing but a disappointment.

With its melodramatic plotline that seems straight out of a discarded script of Desperate Housewives, Playing for Keeps is a failure so momentous not even Butler’s sinfully sexy Scottish accent can compensate.

Taryn Simon dazzles and disturbs at the Corcoran Gallery

by Leigh Finnegan The Corcoran Gallery of Art is filled to the brim with colorful, eye-catching works of visual mastery, but you have to wade through that sea of technical skill to get to photographer Taryn Simon’s A Living Man Declared Dead and Other Chapters, a massive, six-room exhibit that initially overwhelms its viewer with monotony. The walls are hung with gigantic, uniform, brown frames grouped into sets, all following the same formula—one or more with headshot

photographs of somber-faced individuals, a slender one with small black writing, and another with photographs, legal documents, or other archives, all mounted with the most boring shade of tan you’ve ever seen.

It would be easy to be turned off by this monochromatic display, to turn around and withdraw into exhibits easier on the eyes and the mind. But to do so would be a mistake—A Living Man Declared Dead is ingenious, devastating, thought-provoking, informative, and unlike anything you’ve ever experienced in an art museum.

TarynSimon.com

If you had to wear uniforms like these, you’d be depressed, too.

The concept behind the exhibit originated with a journey.

Simon spent four years travelling the world, finding families from different cultures with stories that both compel and disturb. She took a photograph of each individual in the family, representing the deceased and those who could not be identified or declined to participate with photos of their clothing, teeth, bones, or a blank photo.

The text is a genealogy and description of the family’s story, and the final panel displays artifacts related to that story, the three components combining the historical, cultural, and human elements of a familial line.

And while Simon is considered a “photographer,” what makes this exhibit so phenomenal is not her use of the lens, but her storytelling and knack for tapping into basic human emotions, namely empathy, outrage, and moral indignation.

The individuals Simon chose for her works are anything but commonplace or familiar by Western standards.

In matter-of-fact language free from judgment or commentary, Simon effectively and powerfully outlines stories that are heartbreaking (a Scottish family plagued by birth defects

from fetal absorption of thalidomide, including a woman with severely deformed arms and hands), horrifying (two Brazilian families in a feud that has lasted several decades and claimed dozens of lives), and deeply unsettling (a Palestinian woman whose description begins, “Leila Kaled hijacked her first plane at 13”).

The exhibit’s multicultural aspect often serves to highlight the singularities of cultures outside of the West, as exemplified by the massive family of a polygamous African doctor, who has nine wives, 32 children, and 63 grandchildren.

While this is a harmless idiosyncrasy, other cultures are cast in a much more negative, terrifying light. In these cases, the additional artifacts on the final panels prove the most effective, particularly because of Simon’s apparent desire to shock and disturb her audience.

An African family dotted with albino individuals faces hardship from human poachers, who believe their skin and hair hold magical properties, and Simon includes a large photograph of a dead albino infant, armless and lying in a pool of blood. Although the photographer ’s language never

betrays any value judgment, the image is meant to distress on a basic moral level, and it is one of many impressions that will stay with the viewer long after leaving the gallery.

Interestingly, the photographs of individuals, which take up most of the exhibit’s space, are the least striking part. The one exception is a family of 32 Australian rabbits, all pictured in clear boxes on wooden pedestals, sniffing their surroundings or staring at the camera. While this seems cute and quirky at first, a glance at the final panel brings the crash morbid reality—the rabbits are being killed en masse due to overpopulation, and an overhead photograph of a single grave filled with 32 rabbit corpses provides a jarring contrast to the animated, lively bunnies.

Because of its sheer size as well as subject matter, A Living Man Declared Dead is mentally and emotionally exhausting.

After experiencing the final chapter, the viewer would be wise to seek therapy with the Damien Hirst exhibit down the hall—the patterns of repeating dots won’t erase Simon’s message, but at the very least they include some color.

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the georgetown voice 11

“if you need a friend, get a dog.” — Wall Street

lez’hur ledger Fuego Cocina douses authenticity Hilltop Horoscopes

by Alex Golway Fuego Cocina y Tequileria recently opened its doors in Clarendon promising diners an experience that doesn’t quite live up to its fiery name. The Mexican restaurant and tequila bar is the newest business from the owners of Passion Food Hospitality, a group of chefs with American, Latino, and seafood restaurants in the DMV area. With its stiflingly opulent atmosphere, the restaurant is a far cry from the local, small family owned taquerias that it ought to resemble.

It sits a few blocks from the Metro station, half-full with young couples and groups of friends enjoying a meal and a drink. Boasting a menu of flavorful, albeit not quite auténtico, Mexican dishes and a wide selection of cocktails and tequilas, this upscale restaurant is neither your neighborhood Chipotle, nor a genuine Mexican restaurant of any stripe.

The meal starts with a basket of tortilla chips and two types of “sauces” that masquerade as salsa, with small $10 guacamole bowls available to order. Like bread at an Italian restaurant, these chips are tasty, but the “salsas” are of nebulous origin, certainly not made from peppers, and have a crisp, but undefinable taste. Fuego Cocina offers an array of botanas, or appetizers for

the table, including overpriced crabmeat quesadillas, steamed mussels, and vegetable empanadas and other dishes you might expect to find in a steakhouse.

The selection of soups and salads is limited, but Fuego Cocina delivers good options: the house salad is crisp and fresh, while the Sopa Azteca combines crispy tortilla chips and shredded chicken (though they make you assemble the soup yourself, for some reason; for $7, I usually expect the chef to make my food for me). It was also irritating to have the waiter constantly warn you that the food “is spicy,” as if it either did not say so on the menu already, or as if you were a small child that had to be chided that the stove was hot.

Thanks for the newsflash: habanero peppers are spicy.

The mini tacos, which cost an outrageous $7 for a pair, are delicious; fillings range from familiar pork, beef, and chicken to more adventurous roasted goat and beef tongue. Each plate comes with three sauces, the spiciest being the habanero (which the waiter will again remind you, is made of peppers, and therefore is hot). Just in case anyone was unaware, Fuego Cocina takes spice seriously. The Camarones is a cluster of grilled shrimp nestled in a bed of jicama slaw, while the Suadero balances tender beef brisket with

Not all adaptations are alike

Konstantin Levin is expected to live the life of a 19th century Russian aristocrat—days devoted to a bureaucratic job, afternoons spent in St. Petersburg salons, discussing politics or more likely gossiping, and evenings devoted to a vodka fueled dinner, ball, or a night at the opera. But this isn’t satisfactory to the thoughtful Levin, an essential character in Tolstoy’s epic novel, Anna Karenina, and a significant figure in a recent film interpretation.

In contrast to the glitz and scandal of the titular heroine’s life, Levin’s own daily existence is characterized by rural simplicity.

He focuses on family and “the true human experience” distant from the superficiality of St. Petersburg, with a credo that strongly echoes that of the author himself; Tolstoy lived the pure, Christian life that Levin idolizes. Nevertheless, he

clearly understood the allure of Anna Karenina’s “immoral” affair with dashing cavalry officer Count Vronsky enough to draw in his own audience.

As an Eastern European myself, I’m personally acquainted with the bitter cold winters and vodka-induced rosy cheeks that are often linked to the stereotypical whirlwind affairs and sweeping gestures that characterize classic Russian novels.

It was just this kind of passion that first drew me into the dense and sprawling, yet emotionally wide-reaching Anna Karenina. However, it’s something that Joe Wright’s screen adaptation doesn’t quite manage to recreate, in spite of many notable elements that make it visually arresting. Masterfully conjuring the atmosphere of

jalapeno and onions. Cradled in warm, soft tortillas, these tacos are satisfying when paired with one of the other appetizers or shared with botanas.

They’re also less expensive alternatives to Fuego Cocina’s entrees, which run between $15 and $24. An extra $3 buys one of various rice, bean, or vegetable side dishes that ought to be included automatically in a Mexican meal. However, while these tacos are muy delicioso, they’re anything but Mexican.

They are far too decadent, elegant, and mildly flavored to be anything resembling the boisterous and flavorful cuisine of their namesake.

In that vein, I’m not sure that any restaurant that doesn’t offer tamales, burritos, or enchiladas can be rightfully called a Mexican restaurant. This is what I would imagine Wolfgang Puck would come up with if he started a taqueria: elegant and refined, with subtle but savory flavors.

What this establishment lacks is any sort of connection with the loud, busy, friendly taco shacks that dot the streets of Southern California. The salsas aren’t spicy, the items are too expensive, and the food does not come close to resembling a hearty, simple meal. If authentic Mexican food is what you’re looking for, this glorified imitation is hardly the desired destination.

Moscow society, the film is characterized by an alternative setting, literal and figurative theatricality, and cinematography that are undeniably intricate.

On the other hand, I love Tolstoy’s novel for his beautifully written story lines, woven together in a way that fosters intimacy with

Under the covers

by Emilia Brahm a bi-weekly literary column the reader. The token Russian lusts and furies unabashedly engaged my emotions. I would think about it when I wasn’t reading, and even now, years later, think of Anna everytime I see a train.

But Anna Karenina is not just a passionate, emotional tale in the classic Russian tradition, nor is it the simple parable I would expect from a moralist author. At the

Cancer: 6/22-7/22 Now that Voxy Gurl has left Vox and has free time, you be might able to get her number.

12/22-1/19: Capricorn Brace yourself for another sexually unsuccessful yet extremely stressful semester.

Leo:

7/23-8/22 The mental trauma from the exam period will literally turn you into a Chicken Madness.

1/20-2/18: Aquarius There is currently a Mask & Bauble musical production in the works about your procrastination.

Virgo:

8/23-9/22 The world will end on Dec. 21, 2012, but only for you. Everyone else will be perfectly fine.

2/19-3/20: All you’re getting for Christmas is Georgetown President DeGioa’s undying love and affection.

Libra:

9/23-10/22 No Jesuit professors in your Preregistration? Might as well drop out and transfer to Syracuse.

5/21-6/21: Gemini Preregistration did not turn out in your favor and neither will the add/drop period. Hoya Saxa.

Scorpio: 10/23-11/21 If abroad in the Spring, you’ll make headlines for “indecent exposure.” If not abroad, same thing.

4/20-5/20: Taurus No, really, it’s time for you to do your laundry. You cannot just wait for exam season to be over.

Sagittarius: 11/22-12/21 Jack and JJ will tear into you like a cardboard box for not attending a Georgetown basketball game.

3/21-4/19: Your month long break from Leo’s will not make it any better, but in fact, make it worse.

deepest level, it is an experience.

The novel portrays how lives intersect and examines the influence of so many personalities, desires, and beliefs that we have very little power to change.

Therein lies the tremendous attraction of the narrative—Anna reminds us all that we are fundamentally vulnerable. Tolstoy isn’t condemning Anna for her supposedly sin-induced misery, though he clearly doesn’t condone her actions. Rather, in traditional Christian tradition, he believes God is the true judge.

Nevertheless, the novel holds a power over me, an atheist. Anna’s story seems to carry the universal message that it is up to us to judge ourselves. Elements of her tale can be found in any great tragedy, just as Levin’s can be discovered in any happy ending. As the conjunction of so many fates, Anna Karenina can’t be absorbed in one sitting, and

Pisces

Aries

its meaning for me has changed throughout my life.

We live in an era of breadth, not depth. In its original form, Anna Karenina is a different experience for every reader, but unmistakably intense and effective beyond the powers of Wright’s condensation and interpretation. Wright’s film can and should be enjoyed, but can offer only a remnant of the original work’s true pleasure.

Screen adaptations of literature, though well-intentioned and often an exciting prospect for any fan of the original work, typically fail to capture the emotional core of a narrative in the midst of melodrama.

As difficult as it may be to admit for avid moviegoers, nothing can replace the traditional experience of sitting down with a classic novel.

Throw film adaptations under a train with Emilia at ebrahm@georgetownvoice.com

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december 6, 2012

C r i t i c a l V o i ces

El Perro Del Mar, Pale Fire, Memphis Industries Much like the name it bears, Swedish solo act El Perro Del Mar’s Pale Fire contains all the subtle strength of a gently burning white flame. While melodically subdued, the record has a palpable power only slightly dimmed by Sarah Assbring’s reverberant, airy vocals that result in a satisfyingly ambient synth-pop concoction.

Pale Fire is by no means ideal; in fact, it sounds rather monotonous at first listen. Only afterwards do the nuances and intricacies laced through the music float out of the thin wisps of rhythms and lyrics.

The title tracks leads off with sharp horn attacks followed by claps and hi-hats with kick and snare notes dominating the lower frequen-

cies. Assbring relies heavily on repetition of the line, “Never get out of this pale, pale fire” to create a hypnotic and melancholy image of a distant passionate memory that seems to forever act as a temptress, never again to appear in the listener’s life.

“I Carry The Fire” is the only track that strays from such themes, instead providing contradicting evidence in favor of the existence and attainability of hope. The song features heavier drums, dueling synthesizers, and occasional slap bass progressions that add what can be considered momentum to an LP that can otherwise easily put the listener in a trance.

Indeed, this bass is prevalent on the best tracks of Pale Fire, which returns to crushing dreams and destroying faith in humanity as soon as the final note of “I Carry The Fire” fades into the distance. “Walk On By,” a clear winner on the album, features the most active bass sections that complement the electronic beats and horns pushing along Assbring’s reluctant verses that begin with, “Solitude is my best friend / The only one that sees me cry,” encouraging the listener to do the same.

Constantly evolving, Pale Fire offers the listener a new perspective with each listen. El Perro Del Mar

Quentin-ssential Tarantino

The path of a filmmaker’s career can often take twists and turns, at times making critics out of former fans. For Quentin Tarantino, such defectors are largely confounded by his most recent film’s compulsive dips into farcical comedy. How, they inquire, could the genius behind two ‘90s masterpieces create a movie as incoherent and painfully self-indulgent as Inglourious Basterds? Either the auteur is criminally misunderstood or his trademark obsession with violence and pop culture references has enervated audiences’ tolerance for the absurd. Tarantino apologists point to the former; the absurd is what they crave most.

And they are right.

Before outlandishly predicting what detractors will say about Tarantino’s upcoming Django Unchained, however, let’s investigate how Inglourious Basterds managed to ruffle so many feathers in cinema’s upper echelons. The list of grievances includes everything

from the kitschy ending to the lengthy and characteristically confusing material. These very same complaints, strangely enough, also identify what makes Tarantino films so enigmatically satisfying.

Roger Ebert is not far off when he labels Tarantino “a director of quixotic delights.” The insertion of outrageous segments into his films (like a lightning bolt on a sunny day, Samuel Jackson narrates a twominute profile on Nazi slayer Hugo Stiglitz in IB) is a manifestation of the director’s unwavering vision. If the utterly bizarre has appeared in all of Tarantino’s films, it’s difficult to see why critics were so dumbfounded by IB’s ludicrous touches.

After all, the only people you hear complaining about Pulp Fiction’s gimp scene are reactionaries.

In any case, what Tarantino strives for is an amalgamation of B-movie nods, gratuitously badass violence, witty discourses on pop culture nonsense, and above all, an endlessly entertain-

may drive the audience into melancholia with the strained vocals on “To The Beat Of A Dying World,” reassure with a mellow love song on “I Was A Boy,” and calm with the almost entirely instrumental album closer “Dark Night,” but the LP will never disappoint.

Voice’s Choices: “Walk On By,” “I Was A Boy” —Kirill Makarenko

Ke$ha, Warrior, RCA Records With her signature riot of glitter and war paint, Ke$ha has established a character for herself that doesn’t stray far from a party girl stereotype. In spite of this image, the pop singer-songwriter has masterfully expanded her repertoire by capturing a vast array of ing experience. The tongue-incheek tone of his movies should not exempt them from artistic praise; the Oscar recognition that his actors and screenplays have received in spite of these lowbrow indulgences is a testament to his films’ cinematic gravitas.

With the understanding that his style has undergone few changes, then, the cause of the recent up-

reel Talk

by John Sapunor

a bi-weekly column about film surge in Tarantino-bashing is somewhat of a mystery. Several theories might explain it, however. While the director’s style has been relatively constant, the historical context of Inglourious Basterds tended to excessively amplify his absurd tendencies. Hence David Denby’s accusation that IB was, “too silly to be enjoyed.” Tarantino’s pompous off-screen persona has also directed waves of animosity his way. Considering he is a man who believes

styles and influences on her superb sophomore effort. True to its name, Warrior has Ke$ha fighting to continue doing what she does best: not giving a fuck.

The title track opens the album with the ideal medley of themes and vocal styles, creating a roadmap for the remainder of Warrior.

A simple, soaring chorus leads to dubstep-laced verses and heavily auto-tuned vocals as Ke$ha convinces listeners to fight for their convictions. “Die Young” and “C’mon,” as well as a large portion of the album, follow up with similar reckless abandon and rhythms reminiscent of Ke$ha’s debut.

Warrior contains substantial and significant evolution, however; Ke$ha takes a leaf out of Taylor Swift’s book, making an ex-boyfriend appear undatable on “Thinking Of You.” “Found out you’re full of it / I’m over it / So suck my dick,” she concludes before launching into the spiteful chorus and ending the track with a whispered, “Teeny weenie.”

Possibly the best track of the album is “Wonderland,” which is a complete departure from most elements of Ke$ha’s distinct style.

Featuring only a drum pad, bassfilled piano chords, and a crying in God because writing comes so easily to him, this ad hominem attack has surely seeped into a few critics’ reviews. Finally, Tarantino’s novelty has worn out. Like Aaron Sorkin, Tarantino is uncannily present in his scripts. Unfortunately, the constant outpouring of these less than subtle screenplays can grow tiresome for critics and audiences alike. An inability to evolve with the times could be Tarantino’s self-inflicted coup de grace.

But as of now, Tarantino’s still got it. Django Unchained received glowing reviews after its first screening. New York Post critic Lou Lumenick elatedly characterized it as a “three-hour homage to Blazing Saddles.” Still, this is coming from a reviewer who labeled IB, “Tarantino’s best work since Pulp Fiction.”

In fact, Inglourious Basterds has an 88 percent fresh rating on Rotten Tomatoes. So what’s the fuss about?

Well, for one, the more vocal of the film’s critics write for prominent newspapers and magazines— David Denby of The New Yorker, Peter Bradshaw of The Guardian, and

electric guitar along with smooth vocals sans rap and auto-tune, the stunningly nostalgic song demonstrates Ke$ha’s true potential outside of the dance anthems that brought her fame.

At the other end of the spectrum is “Dirty Love,” a brief experiment that features rock artist Iggy Pop and his distinct rock ‘n’ roll influences.

Though the track is the shortest on Warrior at just 2:44, “Dirty Love” makes a powerful impact. Pounding kick and snare drums pave the way for crunchy guitar riffs and Ke$ha’s nearly unrecognizable growls and ornamentations that rival those of Joan Jett, offering yet another glimpse at the transforming artist’s incredible versatility.

Though Warrior demonstrates Ke$ha’s ability to traverse genres, the singer’s forays into new musical arenas seem to signify a careful toe in the water rather than a full-fledged dive. If Ke$ha further enhances her artistic evolution to match the vigor of her content and songwriting, her career will have no chance of dying young.

Voice’s Choices: “Wonderland,” “Supernatural” —Kirill Makarenko an ambivalent Manohla Dargis of The New York Times. These are the upper echelons of cinematic criticism whose opinions shape Academy voters’ ballots. In Hollywood, this minority matters; the esteemed writers will shape history’s conception of a filmmakers’ oeuvre. The esteemed writers have a unique say in deciding what films stand as works of art, and as of now, Tarantino’s output is divorced from artistic praise because of this inane arrangement.

We’ll see if Django can sway this group’s opinion, but from what I gather, Quentin will always be impervious to such criticism. He knows what he’s good at, and he sticks with it. Managing to make his movies both amusing and, for the most part, cinematically commendable is a feat worthy of the most stringent critics’ esteem. But then again, this is a man who’s seeking approval from only one being: God. Kill Bill again with John at jsapunor@georgetownvoice.com

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— Madhuri Vairapandi

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december 6, 2012

If the Grinch can glorify Christmas, so can atheists

by John Sapunor Last Christmas Eve, a rumor started making its way around the dinner table. “The atheists are trying to ruin Christmas again,” the more religious of the company proclaimed. The situation, which involved a nativity scene displayed on public grounds in Santa Monica, Cal. would seep its way into the news this year. Less than a month ago, a judge ruled that atheists can display their Flying Spaghetti Monster “god” in the company of the nativity scene, a ruling that spawned the Christian community to withdraw from participating in the holiday display altogether. Christians, understandably, were furious.

What’s wrong with those atheists? Why can’t they let people celebrate their holiday in peace?

Before proceeding to answer these questions, it may be appropriate to disclose that I, the writer, am an atheist. Not an agnostic, an atheist. And I, like many atheists, find myself enthralled by the Christmas season. As an ex-Catholic, I may be a little biased here,

(though on that note, many of the secular-minded Jews I know are hypnotized by Christmas’s charming traditions) but I have and will always celebrate Christmas. With its presents, family dinners, and communal embracement, what’s not to love about Christmas?

In a recent interview on The O’Reilly Factor, American Atheists President David Silverman defended the battle against the nativity scene by categorizing the use of public property for religious displays as a violation of the First Amendment. While this may be true in a strictly legal sense, the offensive stance these atheists took came as a disappointment to even the most rigid atheists (me included). While I disagree with the government funding or subsidizing religious activities, displaying a nativity scene on public property is among the most innocuous and apolitical religious activities that have been placed on the militant atheists’ agenda. In this case, the atheists chose the wrong fight, and they are all the worse for it.

The ramifications for this outcry over such a miniscule public

display are disquieting. While it’s difficult to classify atheists into a single ideological category, most atheists would agree that increasing public tolerance for non-belief in the U.S. is fundamental to gaining influence in the political arena.

In other words, while I am a fan of pontificating atheists such as Christopher Hitchens who claim “religion poisons everything,” I can’t see the proclamation of such viewpoints as beneficial to the atheist community. In fact, Hitchens and the New Atheists’ agenda to denigrate the religious community has unintentionally given believers a reason to suspend their tolerance of atheists; with such wide-sweeping statements, it becomes easy for the religious community to pigeonhole atheists as vitriolic opponents of all who disagree with their non-belief.

The reality could not be further from the truth. Many atheists come to their non-belief not as a rebellion against dogmatic religion but as a passive conclusion that their faith in a higher, benevolent being has disintegrated. Others are simply raised in non-believing families and have no personal ven-

detta against religious institutions.

It should come as no surprise that many of these atheists continue to celebrate Christmas despite a lack of belief in the virgin birth of Jesus Christ—and commercialization has made their half-assed participation easier than ever.

Like most the rest of us, atheists fear the extremists of the flock who poison the public perception of all non-believers. While most atheists can find common ground in issues such as usurping “In God We Trust” as the official motto of the U.S., it is difficult to see a pro-Christianity political agenda in public displays featuring Christmas trees and shepherds in a manger; it doesn’t help when the atheist extremists try to piss off Christian communities by ridiculing their beliefs and traditional ordinate Christmas displays. Surely there are a good number of atheists who get a kick out of the nativity scene, which, in their minds, sits alongside the harmless company of Christmas trees and candy canes.

As usual, I’m going to attend midnight mass on Christmas morning this year. I’m going to

pop is great on the dance floor for an easy thrill, but has no place on all-time top song lists. I’ve seen a greater diversity of musical tastes in my country town! Georgetown students, despite their activist political tendencies, simply do not treat music as having a greater purpose.

It’s difficult to understand why commercialized music is so popular here. Stereotypically, talented and impassioned kids are like sheep, following the herd. This observation recommends a conclusion that I don’t want to

believe. If pop is a shallow genre students herald as the pinnacle of the art form, what does that imply about us? Are we just as superficial as the music in our ears? I would like to think not, but striking up an intelligent conversation about Nicki Minaj’s “Super Bass” is like grasping at straws: impossible.

Perhaps there’s a deeper reason. Alternative music, that once rebelled against the mom and pop bands in the decades past, has now become mainstream. The genre that once distanced itself from commercial control has now been bought out. The music changed from music of purpose to music of corporations, much like pop music. Instead of making music for music, “alternative” or “indie” musicians have sold themselves out so as to achieve the all-important title of “star.” Being a hipster is often only skin deep.

Pop rock bands, such as Fall Out Boy and Panic! At The Disco and their forced rock growls, have begun bleeding into alternative music. As consumers of this type of music, we’re feeding this mediocrity.

What happened to inspired and impassioned students like us listening to bands that actually stood for something, not only great and groundbreaking music but something that

had meaning and a greater shelf life than a few months?

What happened to following musicians like Bob Dylan who turned, bowed, and thanked his band rather than the audience when the show was over, or The Sex Pistols, who would terrorize your Leave it to Beaver family with only their guitar rhythms? Bands that didn’t care what the world thought because they had a message to share. They were inspired and were going to play their hearts out even if everyone and their mom thought they sucked.

Now we are stuck with egotistical musicians, more interested in the perks of being famous than having their voices heard. Frankly, we’re to blame for the dire situation that music is in today.

I don’t expect everyone to hate pop music, but I certainly expect more college students to worship bands that matter more than glitter pop songstresses like Katy Perry. Music serves to give the unrepresented a voice and the cahnce to inspire with the stories they tell. As Georgetown students, why are we so unmoved by this fact? Most of the major social revolutions in the 20th century were accompanied by equally transformative musical movements--the eras of rock and roll, disco, and hip hop all coincided with larger

sing Christmas hymns that mention Jesus’ miraculous birth. In fact, Charles Schulz, a self-proclaimed agnostic, found it fit to include Linus’s “true meaning of Christmas” speech in the immortalized A Charlie Brown Christmas.

Unfortunately, I won’t be able to drive past Santa Monica’s annual nativity scene thanks to my “comrades” in the “war against Christmas.” You see, some traditions should survive for their own quaint delectability. As I scan the horizon of Copenhagen, I cannot help but think of the atheists (who count for around 90 percent of Denmark’s population) who continue to celebrate Christmas without altogether abandoning the recognition of the holiday’s origin.

American believers and non-believers alike could learn a thing or two from their counterparts across the Atlantic.

John Sapunor is a junior in the MSB. Like Cindy Lou, he loves to befriend strange, green old men and ride in sleighs pulled by rein-dogs.

Georgetown student activism extends just short of their iPods

by Ana Smith It doesn’t take long to realize that the range of musical interests here on the Hilltop is minimal. Nearly every party and friend you encounter will be blasting the same genre of music: pop--that mindless genre of catchy tunes and empty lyrics that, like a onenight stand, are a good time but lack purpose. The genre mercilessly recycles melodies, bass lines, and lyrics from generation to generation, and yet still receives high praise and accolades. Admittedly,

Even Boromir doesn’t know how to pronounce Ke$ha. K-dollar-sign-ha?

societal shifts.

The point is not just that pop music is ultimately saccharine fluff. It is that Georgetown students are supporting artists who produce meaningless dribble. We no longer appreciate musicians, the few that there are, who make music for music’s sake. Our demand has led to factoryproduced songs of an overly corporatized industry.

Nowadays, even the most innovative of indie bands who initially fought against the record companies for creative independence are signing their souls away. Despite their high IQs and impressive CVs, Georgetown students play the same songs on repeat. I do a double take if anyone even mentions Neutral Milk Hotel or Nirvana, let alone bases a Pandora playlist around such classics.

Miley Cyrus has become the new Nina Simone; we went from “the middle of a revolution” to “a party in the USA.” The G-rated, problem-hiding stereotype is most often associated with the ‘50s. Frankly, it’s just as applicable today.

Ana Smith is a sophomore in the College. Like Rudolph, she wants to lead Hoyas to the light at the end of the pop music tunnel.

voices

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Literally drowning one’s sorrows, Mayan apocalypse style

by Sara Ainsworth In 17 days, the Earth as we know it will no longer exist. Following the Mayans prediction, we will all perish on Dec. 21, 2012. Those that are unfortunate enough to be some of the last to die will watch everything that mankind has built crumble in front of them.

Signs of the coming apocalypse have been there for the past two years.

The massive bird deaths in Arkansas in 2011, the creepy animated baby in the newest installment of The Twilight Saga, and Gangnam Style taking the coveted most-watched YouTube video from its rightful owner Justin Bieber all clearly indicate that the end is nigh.

This year may have also seen a number of wonderful events, such as the Elizabeth Taylor biopic starring Lindsay Lohan, but all have done little more than draw our attention away from our preparations for the sizzling Hellfire coming our way.

Many doomsday soothsayers assume the world’s population will perish quickly and in unison. This lack of foresight demonstrates that few have actually contemplated the number of strange ways thousands of people can and will die. Therefore, it is this author’s duty to morbidly reflect on these ways so as to ensure that the general public can go to their gruesome deaths with peace of mind.

TEDDY SCHAFFER

Doomsday is just another opportunity to get drunk and chunder everywhere.

Single-sex schools are so fetch In that oft-quoted scene from Mean Girls, Lindsay Lohan’s voiceover describes Cady Heron’s classroom interactions with the dim but studly Aaron Samuels: “On October 3rd, he asked me what day it was.” Thus begins Cady’s descent from straight As to Fs, from math whiz to stereotypical dumb girl, all for the sake of impressing a guy.

Imagine how differently that scene, and that whole movie, would have played out if Cady had gone to an all-girls school.

I’ll tell you one thing—it would have been a lot less dramatic.

The argument in favor of single-sex education has long been based around the sexual attraction between the genders; in a critical period of growing up, when hormones are raging and hemlines are rising, it’s best to keep them in separate cages. And this is true in many

regards—Cady would have paid more attention if Aaron’s hair hadn’t been between her and the chalkboard, and everyone knows the average teenage boy’s attention span is inversely related to the number of boobs in the room. While this line of thought doesn’t hold water in many situations—think LGBT students—there are numerous other reasons why the best high school experience, particularly for girls, is one with single-sex classrooms.

There’s a stereotype we all know about genders and academics: Men are better at mathematics and hard sciences. But the idea that women can’t do math is one I had never considered, had never even heard of, before coming to Georgetown.

Here, I’ve been asked what it’s like to be a girl and a Math major, if I feel outnumbered or intimidated by my male peers.

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One of the most likely causes of death will be drowning, due to massive floods or tsunamis. However, there are other substances besides water that could send many to their watery grave. The Brazil, Russia, China, the U.S., and Germany are the top-five beer producing nations in the world. For beer virgins, beer that is being brewed is contained in giant metal vats, thereby posing a huge hazard during doomsday.

When the acid rain begins falling, the rain will corrode through the roofs of the breweries, as well as the vats full of beer. All those in the immediate vicinity will drown in pints of ale, officially solidifying the frattiest possible way to die.

Another huge killer during the final hours will be falling debris, particularly for those who live in areas prone to avalanches, mudslides, volcanoes, earthquakes, tornadoes, and hurricanes--read everyone.

However, even those lucky few who are insulated from the ravages of Mother Earth will find themselves pinned down by shattered glass and the things behind it. When the apocalypse begins, a sound will resonate around the world so highpitched that all glass will shatter, killing millions. Those in the Western Hemisphere who survive will find

themselves cornered by Christmas decorations for a holiday they will never celebrate. Giant orbs and unmanned sleighs will come crashing out of their placements in store window displays, squashing all those in their paths. Clearly, it will be Santa’s last revenge against the naughty.

If by some stroke of random luck the apocalypse does not arrive on Dec. 21, we can still be assured this next way to die will befall us. When I was a child, we used to laugh at how everything in our house said “Made in China,” as though Americans were incapable of making anything themselves. During the apocalypse, this mass consumerism will all come back to haunt us. Within all “Made in China” goods are toxic levels of noxious gas. They are currently contained by the relative stability of the temperatures where they’re located.

However, when doomsday arrives and temperatures start changing drastically due to the eruption of a number of volcanoes, sudden hurricanes, and the breakdown of all air conditioning units due to acid rain, this will be an issue. All “Made in China” goods will begin spewing poisonous gas, killing all those nearby. It’s already too late to buy into the local craze: you will die.

Approximately 13 hours, 12 minutes, and 16 seconds after the

My ignorance of this harmful stereotype is all thanks to my high school, an all-girls, Catholic institution. In the single-sex environment, the dynamics are familiar: there are class clowns, popular kids, jocks, nerds, and the like. The difference is that every one of those roles is occupied by a girl. The kid who sat in the back and made snide remarks, the one who spent the whole period looking in a mirror, and the one who answered every question right were all

Obviously, the real world is chock full of men, and nobody is advocating for same-sex workplaces or graduate programs. But in those formative high school years, when your ego, confidence, and sense of self are being established, it’s better in an environment where you aren’t constantly being reminded by peers, teachers, and administrators that being an intelligent, academically accomplished girl is at best unattractive and at worst impossible.

This is where Cady Heron becomes a cautionary tale.

Yes, she’s fictional, but Mean Girls wouldn’t resonate as much as it does if it didn’t draw on the real American high school experience.

Frankly, I felt the same way Cady did in interactions with a guy I was interested in, who also happened to be pretty awful at math. He asked me how I was doing in calculus, and suddenly I was embarrassed to tell him. How will he ever think I’m cute if I’m better at math than he is? Luckily for me, this guy wasn’t in my classes; I didn’t have to get Cs to impress him, and I didn’t waste my time trying get him to walk in on his girlfriend hooking up with Shane Oman in the projection room.

Carrying On

by Leigh Finnegan

A rotating column by Voice senior staffers

teenage girls, all wearing sweaters, collared shirts, and hideous plaid skirts. There, I wasn’t a girl who was good at math; I was just good at math.

This may seem like a small distinction, but consider this: researchers at University of Arizona found earlier this year that female scientists—accomplished, talented, Ph.D.-holding scientists—felt less engaged with their research and abilities after conversing with male colleagues, and were much more likely to drop out of their programs than men.

doomsday show has started, the final dance will begin. Millions of corpses will reanimate, filling a once human world with zombies. Your once amicable friends and neighbors will turn out to be menacing creatures whose sole purpose is to munch on the living and add them to their ranks. This is when the real hunger games begin.

At this point survivors, who weirdly have not accepted that they will die on this gruesome day, should just give up. Metal has corroded, preventing them from stabbing the zombies’ brain stems, and the atmosphere full of radiation, ash, and death is weighing heavy. At this point, it is time for those left to simply accept their fate.

Evidently, not everyone will be lucky enough to die a traditional doomsday death. It is important that we all realize this and accept it, which as we all know is the last of the five stages of grief. The time for mourning is now folks. Then we can all have the calmest doomsday ever, showing all the apocalyptors just how developed humans are.

Sara Ainsworth is a junior in the SFS. Things on her Christmas list include a leg lamp and a Red Ryder BB Gun. Toy zeppelins are for losers.

For those who worry that single-sex education might lead to a culture shock when, in college, suddenly those weird creatures with big feet and hair on their faces are not only sitting next to you in class but living next to you in your dorm, keep in mind that single-sex education doesn’t mean a single-sex life. I had a healthy number of male friends in high school, and my classmates never had a shortage of boyfriends/hookups/suitors to gossip about at the lunch table (I may not have done that well in the boy department, but that’s a different piece to write).

And that’s the beauty of single-sex education. In many ways, the nuns and the oldfashioned are right—teenagers and hormones go together like candy canes and Glen Coco.

They’re going to date, they’re going to hook up, they’re going to cheat, and they’re going to get very wrapped up in lots of needless drama. But stereotypes aren’t axioms, they’re constructions, and if girls in their formative years avoid an attitude which tells them that they can’t or shouldn’t do something they’re good at, then our schools, our science programs, and our progress as a civilization will be better off for it.

50 shades of blue and gray Here’s the final installment of the Voice’s serial romance novel-cum-murder mystery, 50 Shades of Blue and Gray.

“Well, Tony, you probably still have a lot of questions about the last few weeks,” she whispered, guiding me to the ICC Auditorium, “And since your professor wasn’t able to answer them to your satisfaction, I think you’ll find talking to me to be a stimulating experience. I’ll give you three keys and let’s see if you can’t unlock the secret.

You should be familiar with these characters; after all, they’re all people from your own life.”

“Let’s start with an easy one. Brownishreddish hair. Hipster-y, but in a…cute way. We met at a party one night and got to chatting and I found out that the face between those thick black frames was one you were quite familiar with. As the night wore on and the jungle juice ran low, we stumbled off to a bedroom. Within minutes, clothes were flying off. We hardly even made it to the bed. Kissing my way down that sculpted torso, I ripped off those tight skinny jeans. Our hands intertwined as we wrestled across the bed and fell into a deep passionate kiss, pulling at each other closer, just wanting to feel more, to go further. Finally I couldn’t help myself anymore. ‘I want to taste you,’ I purred. After waiting what felt like an eternity, I finally heard a deep moan of consent. With that I started my way down, kissing those abs, running my hands up those legs, hearing those gasps of pleasure. Finally, the moment I had been waiting for: I slid that last barrier between us down with my teeth and finally allowed myself to indulge. It was everything I had hoped and better. Tongue still working, I heard moaning—

“Keep going…don’t stop…Please, please, oh God!’ Finally, back arching with pleasure, she grabbed my hair, holding me on her until finally, she collapsed, still panting in pleasure.

“Does this remind you of anything from your life?”

“No. Why the fuck would lesbian sex remind me of anything in my life?”

“Oh, well, I guess she probably wasn’t this excited about having sex with you…or that well-pleasured afterwards. So it might not sound that familiar. But Christ, Tony, don’t you remember the girls you fuck?”

“The only hipster I’ve ever hooked up with is Corinne and it couldn’t be her…”

The mystery woman tried to contain her laughter, scoffing, “Silly boy, if only you knew how hard I had to work to convince her to go after you. Nearly as hard as it was to get the key to this room,” she said, unlocking the projection room above the auditorium. While she was distracted with the lock, I grabbed my phone and hit “record,” desperately hoping she would say something incriminating.

After starting the recording, Tony retorted to the woman’s earlier claims, “Corinne didn’t need any convincing.”

“Really? You’re still stuck on that? Do you really think it was coincidence that she was at that party? Do you really think she just happened to be standing by the keg?

Do you really think SNAP showed up just at the perfect moment giving you the perfect excuse to ask her to leave? Actually, don’t answer that. I don’t want to hear about how you think you ‘spit game.’”

called the bro code, not that I’d expect you to understand.”

After a moment of silence, the woman continued, “While I can see your tiny brain reeling with these developments, I don’t have time to wait for you to process this. So let’s move on. My question has two parts. It begins on a night much like tonight, a night spent in Copley Hall.

I lay in bed, caressing the lean, muscular body of a certain 6-foot-2 blonde with icy blue eyes and a dangerous smirk that could leave any girl breathless. As he slid my jeans down and reached his hand under my thong, I gasped and clawed at his chest. Suddenly I heard the bathroom door swing open and I grabbed for the covers. Slapping him I snapped, ‘I told you to lock the door!’

“How do you think the murderer got into the apartment that night? She offered a blowjob of course. And what boy refuses a blowjob?”

“‘Babe, I thought I di—,’ he started to reply just as this new boy quickly rambled, ‘Shit! I’m so sorry man! I just wanted to get my Dr. Who scarf back but it’s obviously a bad time.’

“I don’t get it. Was it you?”

“‘Hmm,’ I thought to myself, ‘This could be interesting…one more thing I can do tonight.’ So I yelled out, ‘Wait, you, don’t go so quickly. How about you come over? Join us?’ Both boys looked at me in confusion. I just smirked and replied, ‘Well if you can’t be adventurous in bed, then I’m going to leave.’

“A few shots of tequila later, we were all in bed. With the lights off, I couldn’t see anything but I could feel the heat from their bodies as their hands ran all along my body—” “Okay. No way did that fucking nerd Mike beat me to having a threesome,” I interjected.

“Congratulations,” she said.

“You got part one, even if you’re an asshole talking about your dead friend. But who’s part two?”

“Well…if it was Copley and a blonde kid…it had to be Ryan. But there’s no way he would’ve had a threesome and not told me. It’s

“Well I guess your bros like me better. Besides, what would the ‘Bro Code’ say about having sex while your roommate lies dead one room over?”

“How did you know he was dead?” I demanded.

“You crazy bitch,” I spat.

“Hush now. We still have one more game to play. There are more players in tonight’s performance.”

“Wait but all of those people are dead. So who else have you killed tonight?”

“Well…these players aren’t so much actors as they are directors. These murders have all been done at their cue.”

“No. Your stupidity almost makes this unenjoyable. Although then again, all these things have been done for someone else as part of a master plan—a plan to show you all the error of your sinful ways. I, along with my fellow Ladians, have been acting as succubi for the Stewarts, reorienting the souls of the student body towards evil to convince the university to shepherd its flock back to the path of righteousness. And it’s worked. Look around you: parties are banned, drinking has diminished, and students have been forced back to the Book. We’ve won and nobody will ever find out about it,” she snapped, reaching for his throat.

Tony jumped back and hit the floor, knocking out the light as he fell. Flying forward to seize him, she tripped, hitting her head on the desk. She lay unconscious on the ground. Tony stumbled to his feet and flicked on the lights. He grabbed his phone, saved the recording, and called the Post. As an afterthought, he also decided to call the police, who came and arrested the still-unconscious Ladian. With the truth finally revealed and the murderer put behind bars, the University lifted the anti-party regulations and there was much rejoicing.

So it goes.

— Lady Macbeth, Macbeth, and Damned Spot