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Chapter 12 - Human Sexual Wellness _______________________________________________________

Limbic system _________________________________________________

Under the cerebral cortex lies a part of your brain called the limbic system, which is responsible for emotion. There are identical limbic systems in both of your hemispheres, but because they are in close contact with each other via the corpus callosal bridge, we can treat them as a single unit. Just as the cerebral cortex is divided into several parts, the limbic system also has several structures. Ordinarily, the cerebral cortex overrides the limbic system, that is why you don‟t act like an emotional retard twenty four seven. However, if the cerebral cortex is sedated, the limbic system takes over.

Then you become basically an emotional animal.

One of the major parts of the limbic system that we are concerned with is the fornix. This structure is buried deep within the temporal lobe on each side of the head. Interestingly, the fornex has a significant influence on an individual‟s libido. When the electrodes were put into a rat‟s fornex and then stimulated, they became markedly over sexed. The males would try to mount anything in their vicinity, including inanimate objects. The females became just as sexually aggressive, attempting to have sex with whatever was at their disposal, including water facets.

Knowing how rats respond to the stimulation of their limbic system, a number of researchers got together and decided they would use this information to see if they could get rats to engage in homosexual behavior. Nice guys, right?

They put electrodes into the fornex of a number of male rats.

Then, when the rats got close to each other they stimulate their fornex. Their idea was that once they stimulated the rats, they would immediately copulate.

Well, it didn‟t quite work out that way. When they stimulated the limbic system of the rats, they attacked each other violently. As a matter of fact, as soon as the rats were shocked, they would stand up on their hind legs, face the other rat, open their mouth and bare their teeth. Then, they would strike out at the other animal furiously. It was obvious that something was wrong. Upon further investigation, it was discovered that they put the electrodes in the wrong place in the limbic system. They inadvertently put the electrodes in the amygdale, another segment of the limbic system rather than the fornex. Of course, at the time no one realized that the limbic system had anything to do with violence or aggressive behavior. Thus, a whole new area of research was embarked upon.

For the next few years, researchers were busy implanting electrodes into the amygdala of animals.

What they found was rather interesting. For example, as mentioned, they found that if they stimulated the amygdala of rats, they would furiously attach each other. Even more fascinating was the fact that when they put a small rat in a cage with a big rat and stimulated the small rat‟s amygdale, he would still attack the big rat. This was rather starling because like with humans, there is a hierarchy in the animal kingdom.

Ordinarily smaller and weaker animals will not attack bigger and more powerful animals. They will usually cower away from the more powerful animal. It seemed that when the rat‟s amygdala was stimulated he had no control of his emotions. Eventually, they took this finding to a higher level. They put a restrained cat in the cage with the rat. Naturally, when the rat saw the cat, he kept as much distance between him and the cat as possible, but when they stimulated the rat‟s amygdale, guess what happened? The darn rat attacked the

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cat, and of course, the cat ate the rat, which just goes to show you that if you can‟t control yourself you can get killed…like dead even.

Interestingly, certain drugs like anabolic steroids can illicit similar type of behavior in human beings. Oh, one more thing. The higher a man‟s testosterone level the greater his libido. Like estrogen testosterone affects the limbic system which is responsible for libido. In other words, the more testosterone running through a male‟s blood the hornier he is.

This may interest you. In 1999, we wrote a book entitled The World’s Biggest, Strongest, Fastest Athletes…Their Drug Routines. We literally went all over the world seeking out world class athletes who would talk candidly about the drugs they were using to train for competition. First of all, we were shocked to find out the amount of drugs these guys were actually using. Believe it or not, the average dosage of drugs for the athletes we interviewed was over 3000 milligrams a week. Interestingly, every one of these athletes had tremendously high libidos. In fact, this was a common strain among all the athletes we interviewed who were taking large concentrations of steroids. They all had veracious sex drives… almost to the point of being male nymphomaniacs. Just about every one of them confessed that they needed sex constantly. They just couldn‟t get enough sex. Why? Remember, when we talked about the limbic system, we said this part of the brain was responsible for sexual behavior and aggressive behavior. If the ventral portion of the limbic system, more specifically the fornex, is stimulated, then the person will experience a heightened libido. Well, testosterone does, in fact, stimulate the ventral portion of the fornex, explaining why individuals taking steroids, which are derivatives of testosterone, can‟t seem to get enough bootie.

Now you know the rest of the story.

Intra-psychic Determinants ______________________________________________________________________________

If you read anything about personality theory, you will find that many psychologists view human sexual behavior as a mental trait or characteristic that is determined by a person‟s subjective outlook on life. From this intrapsychic position, personality traits are produced both by one‟s biological inheritance and what happens during certain critical stages in a person‟s early development. We are born with certain innate response patterns called instincts that are genetically passed along to us by our parents. Our childhood environments, particularly our interactions with our parents, shape or mold these instinctual thoughts and behaviors into what we call our minds. As we mature, our minds become more and more capable of acting on their own and we become more and more capable of achieving our own personal subjective goals…within the limits set by our bodies and our cultures. What does all this mean? Simply, your behavior is not only contingent upon your biochemistry and your social environment, but also by the way you perceive your environment. In brief, you have a chemical side, a social side and a mental side that makes up your behavior.

Social and Psychological Sex Your Social Environment _______________________________________________________________________

Of the hundreds of different societies studied by social scientists, all of them have placed some restrictions on sexual activities. For instance, incest taboos are found in almost all cultures. However, the type of incest prohibited varies considerably from one society to another. For example, in some cultures sex among siblings is permissible, but in other cultures such behavior is strictly prohibited. Along these same

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lines, G.P. Murdock stated that of the 158 societies he had studied, 70 percent permitted premarital sexual relations, but adultery was “freely allowed” in all but five.

Homosexuality is another sexual behavior that is strongly forbidden in many cultures, but is quite acceptable in others. Within a given society, different segments of the population may prefer quite different forms of sexual activity. Alfred Kinsey and his colleagues reported that people in the upper middle class and the upper class were significantly more likely to engage in kissing, in oral and manual stimulation of the genitals and more likely to be experimental in trying out new sexual positions than were people from the so-called lower class. However, the greatest amount of sexual activity seems to occur among men and women in the lower or lower middle class who have a high school education, but have not gone to college. The Kinsey group also reports that religiously devout individuals, especially women, are sexually more conservative, less active and begin their sex lives much later than non-religious people.

What does all of this tell us? Simple, sexual behavior to a great extent is a learned behavior. We are the sum product of the events we experience. The environment in which we function, the people with whom we interact and the thoughts which we entertain are all data constructs by which we are conditioned. In short, a basic truth that we must accept is that we are products of our parents, persons who, for better or worse, have had a great influence on our lives and the environment that we live in. Therefore, we tend to “act like” the type of person we are socialized to be.

Not only that, but we literally cannot act otherwise, unless we make a conscious effort to do so. Obviously, then, the way you are socialized will go a long way in determining your sexual behavior.

There is no way around it because performance is directly related to how we have been socialized.

Without question, socialization is an important aspect of our sexual development. Our social conditioning applies not only to sexual behavior, but to every aspect of human behavior. All of our actions, feelings, behavior and even our abilities are consistent with our conditioning and/or programming. In short, we tend to “act like” the type of person we conceive ourselves to be.

Obviously, the way we conceive ourselves to be has a lot to do with what people tell us we are.

Let us give you a good example of what we are talking about. There was an extraordinary study done a number of years at by Harvard University which was called “Pygmalion in the Classroom.” We first read about the study ten years ago in Leo Buscaglia‟s book, Living, Loving, and Learning. Now, it seems that every time we open a book connected with education, the experiment is cited. It‟s that significant. Let us tell you about it.

The study was conducted to determine the effect that expectation had upon performance. These professors from Harvard went to a number of high schools and told the teachers that they had a test that could measure which kids in their class were going to grow

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intellectually during the coming year. The test was called the Harvard Test of Intellectual Spurts. The professors told the teachers that the test was the most valid instrument ever constructed to measure intellectual growth. “It will pick the intellectually gifted students right out,” they said. “It never fails.” The professors went into the schools and gave the kids some antiquated intelligence test. After the kids took the test, the professors threw them into the garbage. Then, they randomly selected five names from the teacher‟s role book.

They took the names to the teachers and said, “Look, these are the kids who are going to really excel this quarter. These are your gifted students. The teachers looked at the list and said, “This can‟t be.

This kid here on the list has been brain dead for years and this one is intellectually challenged. And Johnny here, he‟s the closest thing we have to „Attila the Hun.‟ You must be mistaken.” The Harvard professors said, “Trust us. The test never fails. These are the kids who are going to progress intellectually during the year. You‟ll see.” And the teachers looked at each other and thought, “Hey! These guys are from Harvard, they must know what they are talking about.”

Do you know what happened?

Every kid on the list grew beyond expectation. Both the brain dead kid and the mentally challenged kid grew intellectually. Oh, and “Attila the Hun,” he grew like kudzu on at hot Georgia day. He went right off the charts, which just goes to show you that you get exactly what you expect. If you teach a child and you tell him he‟s dumb, you are going to get a child who lives down to your expectations just as if you teach a child and tell him that he‟s smart or gifted, that child will live up to your expectations. The same is true of sexual behavior. If you teach someone to believe promiscuity is acceptable behavior, you are most likely going to get an individual who engages in such behavior.

Conversely, if you teach an individual that promiscuity is wrong, there is a good chance he will shy away from such behavior. Homosexuality is perhaps a better example of the role socialization can play upon sexual behavior.

Homosexual behavior may develop for many reasons. If a child‟s opportunities for sexual exploration are limited to other children of the same sex, the child may experiment with homosexuality. If, later in life, the person‟s first heterosexual contacts are psychological disasters, the person may revert or regress back to homosexuality as a less threatening and more rewarding way of behaving. Having found that same sex contacts can sometimes be stimulating, the person may simply add heterosexual behaviors and interests to the homosexual patter already established. Men and women in prison or in military situations may have little choice in the matter if they are physically prevented from seeking contacts with the opposite sex. Anti-social individuals are often quite willing to “use” members of either sex for their pleasures.

This may surprise you. Sparta, the ancient Greece city state that was celebrated as perhaps the greatest military power in the history of the world… remember 500 Spartans held off 10,000 Persians during the Peloponnesian War…was an entirely homosexual society. In actual fact, the society advocated homosexual behavior between men. The idea was that if the men were in love with each other, they would fight harder to keep each other

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alive. The women in that society were literally kept in dormitories and were used by the men strictly for procreation of other males. Heterosexual behavior was actually considered atypical behavior. It wasn‟t that these soldiers were genetically predisposed to be homosexuals; they were socialized to engage in homosexuality.

What does this tell us? Simple, it tells us that to a large extent we are a product of the people we surround ourselves with. Thus, it is imperative that we surround ourselves with positive people and a positive environment. If anything, society influences an individual‟s behavior.

In a child‟s early years, adults have a strong influence in shaping their world. Adults are charged with meeting needs for food, shelter, warmth and safety. Parents, teachers, religious leaders and caretakers provide the early framework for the child‟s attachment to and relationships with people. These individuals also provide early modeling of appropriate socialization skills necessary for healthy adaptation of the child. Beginning as early as toddlerhood and often by the preschool years, children‟s interactions with siblings and peers begin to provide opportunities for growth and development as well as ground for improvement of social skills and patterning of relationships.

An important part of interpersonal and intrapersonal growth involves the identification of oneself as a sexual being. Children start to learn about their sexuality in the first few months of life when they notice pleasurable areas on their own bodies. As children grow, they begin to develop sex role identities.

Children adopt preferential play activities, often based on their identification as a boy or a girl. They begin to learn about social norms, customs and morals through their social environment. Parents often provide the imprint and early guidance around sexuality and later on peers provide further influence on feelings about, meanings of and expression of sexuality. In short, we are a product of our social environment and the people who live in it.

Sex and the Media ____________________________________________________________

Perhaps, it is the media that really reflects America‟s preoccupation with sex. It is also an excellent example of how we can be conditioned and/or socialized sexually. The pressure put on teenagers through ads, television, film and news media to be sexually attractive and sexually active is profound. Provocative images of men‟s and women‟s partly clothed or naked bodies are especially prevalent in all forms of media. The presence of half truths and stereotypes presented by the media is especially disturbing, given research that indicates young people often turn to media for information about sex and sexuality. In 2003, David Buckingham and Sara Bragg reported that two-thirds of young people turn to media when they want to learn about sex…the same percentage of kids who ask their mothers for information and advice. If the media is where we are getting most of our information about our sexuality, we may be in big trouble. Here is some statistics we stumbled across on the internet concerning sexuality and the media. It is rather revealing: Seventy percent of prime time television in the 1999-2000 season included sexual content. Twenty three percent of couples in scenes with intercourse appeared to be ages 18-24. Movies have an 87% likelihood of presenting sexual material. The average American adolescent will view nearly 14,000 sexual references per year. Premarital sex is referred to two or three times every hour in soap operas. More than 3 out of 4 Americans say the way television programs show sex encourages irresponsible sexual behavior.

12-17 year old young men are most susceptible and vulnerable to mass media sexual portrayals. Sixty six percent of children (ages 10-16) surveyed say their peers are influenced by television shows. Sixty four percent of all shows include sexual content and only 15% mention waiting, protection and consequences.

Playboy‟s largest cable channel, Playboy TV, is available in 24 million of the nation‟s 81 million homes that receive satellite, cable, or digital television. The Center for Media and Public Affairs‟ new study found that sexual content is featured once every four minutes on network TV with 98% of all sexual content having no subsequent physical consequences, 85% of sexual behavior having no lasting emotional impact

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and nearly 75% of the participants in sexual activity were unmarried. Sexual content on prime-time TV more than tripled in the past ten years. Forty percent of teenagers have gotten ideas for how to talk to their boyfriends and girlfriends about sexual issues from entertainment media. Teens ages 13-15 rank entertainment media as the top source of information about sexuality and sexual health. Fifty nine percent of parents say their 4-6 year old boys imitate aggressive behavior from television.

Religion and Sexuality _________________________________________________________________

Different religions have different codes of sexual morality, which regulate sexual activity or assign normative values to certain sexually charged actions or thoughts. The views of religions and religious believers range widely from holding that sex and the flesh are evil to the belief that sex is the highest expression of the divine.

Views on sexuality may not even be shared among adherents of a particular sect. Some religions distinguish between sexual activities that are practiced for biological reproduction (sometimes allowed only when in formal marital status and at a certain age) and other activities practiced for sexual pleasure.

Many cultures attempt to set down codes of conduct for their prescriptions concerning individual sexual behaviors. Such codifications are frequently enacted as laws, extending their application beyond the culture to other cultures under the purview of the laws, including dissenters. Most of the Islamic world has strict rules enforced with sometimes violent punishments to impose Islamic moral codes, including sexual morality on their citizens and often attempt to impose it on non-Muslims living within their societies. The same was true of various European Christians regimes at some stages in history. Many contemporary Christians support restrictions on the private expression of sexuality, ranging from relatively uncontroversial prohibitions of prostitution to rather controversial restrictions on oral sex and sodomy. Haredi Jews in Israel use various verbal and print media (newspapers, books, radio shows, websites and etc.) to try to encourage other Jews to follow the Jewish laws of sexuality.

Again, what does this tell us? We are a product of the way we are socialized. If our religion tells us that adultery, homosexuality and promiscuity are wrong, there is a good chance that we will perceive these behaviors as wrong…social conditioning.