Goddess Magazine Homecoming Issue by Goddess Magazine

Reveal The Goddess Within You!

MAGAZI E October/ ovember 2009

The Debate: Natural Hair vs. Relax Hair

THE COLLEGE CHECKLIST 2nd Installment of YOUR guide to the COLLEGE application process

Tips from high school senior about thinking positive and donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t stress out! www.GoddessGirlMag.com

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

Mission Statement

ZÉwwxáá `tzté|Çx

is the premier lifestyle magazine for today's urban young women. Our purpose is to provide teens, ages 14-18, with a positive and clear outlook on today's often harsh society. Goddess Magazine is a bi-monthly online lifestyle magazine that caters to young women’s health, fitness, fashion, beauty, and career needs. Goddess Magazine has added a special flare to the publication; the readers will be the magazine's writers. This is a great way for teens to express their creativity and establish a special relationship with Goddess Magazine. Goddess Magazine is also dedicated to mentoring young women to become leaders and inspire them to connect with themselves and with others!

Goddess Magazine’s Staff Managing Editor Tiffany Walden Staff Writers Jasmyne McDonald Quinton Neal Brandy Bynum Teen Writers Victoria Dudley Rana Tuggle Neferteri Johnson Angelique Boyd Imani Watson Contributing Writers Soraya Walton Tiara Wilkinson Kelli Kolors Quinessa Solomon

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

Founder/EditorFounder/Editor-InIn-Chief Danielle Wideman

Table of Contents 6 GoddessStar: Meet Alexandria Willis 8 CoverGoddess: Briana Brown: Getting Involved 10 GoddessCorner: Superwoman: Overcoming Obstacles of teen parenthood 12 GoddessGoals: The College Checklist 14 GoddessGoals: Finding the Right Scholarships 16 Glam’nGoddess: Getting Down to The Basics 18 GoddessTrend: Homecoming 2009 22 GoddessTrend: Q’s Fashion Corner 23 GoddessCorner: Answering Obama’s Call 24 GoddessHair: Relaxed vs. Natural Hair 26 GoddessHair: Salon Spotlight: Citrin Spa and Wellness Center 28 GoddessHealth: Let’s Talk About Sex 30 GoddessHealth: Mean Girls 32 GoddessCorner: Finding Love??? 33 GoddessCorner: Find the Real You at Tru Ministry 34 GoddessEntertainment: Meet Lady Te 35 LiteraryGoddess: Swagg by: Monica Marie Jones 37 GoddessWithin 38 Goddess’scopes 40 Where to shop www.GoddessGirlMag.com

Meet….Alexandria Willis This month’s GoddessStar is 9-year-old Alexandria Willis. Alexandria is the Chicago winner of the 2009 Ms. Jr. Pre-Teen Cities Of America National Pageant. After four rounds of judging and over 50 pre-teen participants, Alexandria’s bright personality shined through and she was crowned! Goddess Magazine had a chance to catch up with the young star to find out more about her and her dreams and goals. GM: What is your favorite color and why? AW: Purple is favorite color because I want to be to unique and different from other girls because they like pink. GM: What do you want to be when you grow up? AW: I want to be a actress because I love acting all the time. I like to act on the spot. I started acting in classroom plays at school. GM: Who do you look up to and why? AW: I look up to Miley Cyrus because she is a singer and an actress. I want to be like her, but I will be different because I do not want people to think I am copying her. GM: Was this your first year in the pageant? AW: Yes. GM: How does it feel to be Miss Jr. Pre-Teen of Chicago? AW: It feels wonderful because I am going to be a representative of Chicago. GM: How did it feel when they called your name? AW: My heart was beating so fast. I was thinking he was not going to call me, but then he called constant number nine and that was me. Alexiandria will move on to the finals in December to Orlando, Florida. She won an all expense paid trip to the final round along with her sash and crown. She will compete with over 300 girls from around the United States. Goddess Magazine wishes Alexandria the best of luck! Calling All GoddessStars! Do you know a young lady who has been outstanding in school or that is always helping in her community? Goddess Magazine is looking to feature a young woman in our GoddessStar section. This section is dedicated to recognize young women between the ages of 14-18 who has made changes, big or small, to better herself or her community. If you would like to nominate a young lady, please submit a 350 words or less essay describing her accomplishments. All nominations are due by November 16, 2009. www.GoddessGirlMag.com

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

by: Victoria Dudley Teen Staff Writer

Don’t get so stressed out!

You’re not in this Alone 17 year-old, Briana Brown, just like most teens, has many things going on in life. She’s a senior at Kenwood Academy High School. She is one of eight children from her mother Diane Jones and in the fall of 2010, she plans to attend Illinois State University, Hampton University, or DePaul University with the help of a scholarship. Briana’s career choice is to become a counselor, because she wants to help teenagers focus on going to college and that it is as important as

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

Photographer: Terrence Blount Make-Up: J’Alise www.airbrushbyjill.com

With the stress of the economy crashing down on families and the demands of school such as homework levels rising 30% in schools, there’s much to worry about in the life of a teenager. However, one of the things that may subconsciously nag teens the most is probably how to get prepared for the future. The worries of failure may form around your heads like a played out tune and it clouds your thoughts which causes you to think worrisome thoughts such as - “Oh, my gosh! I forgot I had that test today! What college am I going to? How will I pay for it? Oh! I don’t think I studied enough for Midterms!!!” The list goes on and on causing you to feel defeated and think negative towards yourselves. Goddess Magazine had the chance to interview a very bright and intelligent young lady who may have some answers to help you be more confident in yourself. So, hold on to your positive thinking caps and enjoy this ride that’s going to lead you to your care free destination!

everyone says it is. Her main goal, besides becoming a counselor, is to help others, so that they can reach for it if they need it. Briana is currently involved in three organizations: F.O.C.U.S , Christian club and Lady Lounge. Each club benefits her in a different way. The club F.O.C.U.S, deals with helping your community. Recently on a Sunday, Briana along with the members of the club, dressed up in costumes for a book fair in the Hyde Park area and performed a comedy play for the children in the area. Although, it was hot that day, Briana mentioned that the smile on the children’s faces was worth it! The Christian club helps Briana expand her knowledge on the word of God. The Lady Lounge is an all girls group where each member in the club is paired up with a classman once a week. From there, they talk about issues in school, home, and anything else you may want to talk about. The main focus of the Lady Lounge club, says Briana, “Is to get others to realize that even though you’re struggling ,you don’t have to do it alone.” Briana’s involvement in the organizations take up a lot of time; however, she is still able to manage good grades and take part in being involved with her family. What motivated her to help others and participate in various organizations was she hated seeing unfortunate people suffer. Even though Briana could not get them completely out of their situations, at least she could make a small difference by doing what she could to help out. It is important to be a well-rounded individual. It is important to not always think about yourself but to help others who are less fortunate than you. For Briana, growing up with her brothers and sisters has influenced her to be well-

rounded, because they look up to her. Whether it’s an older brother or younger sister, everyone looks up to each other. Coming from a family of eight sounds like a tassel because you have to think about school, commitments such as organizations and sport teams while still including your family in your hectic life. With all families, there comes responsibility. Briana’s method is that your family is important, but school should always come first. We all have our times of doubts, which may cause us to give up on something quickly. Some people may have friends and teachers to help them get back into focus. For Briana, she knows that if she makes a mess of something, her family will be there for her with encouraging words. So, surround yourself with positive people that will help you when you mess up. If you feel overwhelmed, try to relax because there is no need to overwork yourself. Briana’s method for not getting so overwhelmed and balancing out everything is, “School is the number one priority and if you can’t do [outside activities or hang out with friends], then you just can’t do it. You need to put your mind on the prize!” Expectations can be positive, but it can also be stressful as well. With expectations everyone wants something different from you, but how do you balance out what you want and what other’s want? It’s a difficult question to answer, even for Briana, but the easiest way to go about it, is to write down the many expectations that you have for yourself and the expectations your parent’s or guardians may have for you. Here a quick activity to help you figure out your expecta-

tions in life. On a sheet of paper, make two columns. On one side, list what your expectations are for yourself and on the other side, list what others are expecting from you. You will be able to compare your expectations with your parents’ expectations. You can use your list to talk with your parents about what you want to do life and the steps needed to accomplish them. This is a great way to relieve stress and clear up some of the frustrations in life. Briana’s advice to all the Goddess girls out there is: “To take advantage of every opportunity that comes your way. Whether it’s good or bad, take every opportunity…And go to church!” While interviewing Briana, we learned that advice from a fellow teen may be of value to you. Some teens may not like to admit their frustrations with school, friends, or life in general but try not to let your frustrations hold you back. By taking advantage of available opportunities, will help you grow as person. Everyone is a unique individual, but it is up to you figure out how you are going to shine. I hope you took something valuable from this and I hope all goes well!

From one goddess Girl to Another!

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

by: Tiffany Walden Managing Editor

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

Photos taken by Aziza Ngozi Walker, Independent Photographer SoulARTFilms; soulartfilms@gmail.com

When a young girl is asked to describe their ideal superwoman, she visualizes a woman embodying supernatural powers and outstanding capabilities; allowing her to do unimaginable things such as soaring above the clouds and beyond. Yasmine Williams, 21, is definitely the superwoman who did not let the pressures of raising a child at 14years-old detour her from following her dreams. Born in Anniston, Alabama, Yasmine was no stranger to the struggles growing up in an impoverished atmosphere. Her neighborhood mirrored the perpetuating stereotypes of the average AfricanAmerican community. “Basically,” states Yasmine, “it comes to every female is going to have a child or three before graduating high school and every male will have gone to jail before graduating.” It comes to no surprise that the news of her pregnancy at 14, definitely scared Williams into silence. “My biggest fear was telling my mom,” says Yasmine, “not because she would hate me or anything like that, but she

would be disappointed in me because I’ve always excelled in life. I felt like I let her and a lot of people down.” Although Williams was at the top of her class in school, she still had the mind of a child. She found out about her pregnancy while getting a physical to be cleared for the cheerleading squad. At the time, with cheerleading being her main focus, the doctor cleared her for the team and she continued to cheer during her pregnancy. “No one knew that I was pregnant at all,” says Yasmine. “It just looked like I was going through puberty. I actually didn’t tell my mom until I was in labor. I didn’t even know I was in labor. I had to tell someone because the pain was like I was dying. Again, that just goes to show what you don’t know at 14.” Despite the confusion and lack of pre-natal care, Williams gave birth to a healthy baby boy named Joshua Williams. However, Williams believes that she has grown tremendously since she first became a parent. One particular incident Williams remembers from high school, now motivates her to place her son as a number one priority at all times. “At times in high school, being involved [in high

school activities] sometimes took precedence over Joshua,” Yasmine reflects. “There’s one specific incident where I remember Josh was sick. My mom and I took him to the emergency room and waited for hours, you know how that goes. And eventually around four in the morning, I left and my mom stayed. I look back on that now and it still bothers me. Still hurts me.” It hurts Williams to look back and realize how much her son needed the comfort of his mother, yet she chose to leave regardless. Because of that, Yasmine keeps Joshua by her side. Refusing to leave him at home with her mother, she brought Joshua to live with her while attending Northwestern University (NU) in Evanston as a full-time Theatre major. Since being at NU, Williams has been exposed to a diverse environment; she taught herself how to provide a positive life to her son. Williams admits that if she had not pursued her education, she would not be able to give Joshua the things she has given him. “My relationship started to change with Joshua

when I read a book for class,” explains Yasmine. “They talked about reprimanding children in the black community and how we focus on the negative and what you’ve done wrong. Whereas in the white community, they ask questions like ‘Joshua, did you think that was the right thing to do?’ It does work,” she continued. Another important lesson she gained from reading the book is the significance of expanding a child’s vocabulary at an early age. “I noted how black parents don’t talk to their children and how a young white child knows more words than an adult black person by a certain age,” says Yasmine. “I try to expose Joshua to richer vocabulary by giving him alternative words to the words he uses.” Living by example, the mother-son duo takes frequent trips to the local Borders in Evanston where Joshua picks out a toy and they read a couple of books before leaving. Williams also allows Joshua to plan out their days; including their recent trip to the lake, sitting on the rocks Continue on page 41

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

The College Checklist by: Jasmyne McDonald, Staff Writer

7. Obtain scholarship applications

mean:

8. Possible recommendation letters from Common application: The common teachers, coaches and/or employers application is a way to apply to multiEnjoying your senior year thus far? ple colleges without having to fill out (See Goddess Magazine’s August/ You’ve worked hard to get to your last the same information numerous September for more informayear of high school. Now it is time to detimes. Many colleges have adopted tion) velop a balance between enjoying yourthe common application which inYet, don’t worry if you have not done self and beginning to execute the plan cludes your personal statement. Ofall of these things. There is still time to you established last month to pursue ten colleges will require a supplement complete them. your next step in life. If you haven’t form in addition to the generic infortaken care of the preparation items listed October/November mation on the common application. This month is about packaging up in the last issue, here’s a reminder of the Visit www.commonapp.org/ your applications. Getting an early start things you should have done from AuCommonApp/default.aspx for more in August and September will allow you gust/September: information and to find the list of parto get your applications out of the way 1. Build a good relationship with your ticipating schools. and wait for colleges to respond. This counselors and teachers Early decision: Early decision applicaway you can relax the second semester of 2. Obtain your SAT and/or ACT scores tions have early deadlines often in your senior year and devote more of your 3. Have clear ideas of what you need October. Use this kind of application time to applying for scholarships. Set a versus what you want out of the colfor colleges you KNOW you will atgoal of November 31st to have your applileges you are applying to tend if you are accepted. Early decications complete. sion applications come with an agree4. Have a successful conversation with Deciphering what college terms ment that you will withdraw other your parents about what your realismean: applications and enroll at that school. tic options are There are numerous terms on college Getting into a school you applied to 5. Compile a list of colleges you plan to applications that can be difficult to early decision takes some of the presapply to understand. Here is your guide to sure off for the remainder of your sen6. A list of experiences that help you nartruly understanding what colleges ior year; however, this could prevent row down your academic options www.GoddessGirlMag.com

Essay Rules: best student in your class. you from considering another school that may be a better fit. If you want to Answering the college essay ques Follow the guidelines- If a college keep your options open, this is NOT requires you to format your essay tion: an option for you. in a 12 pt font, double spaced, Even though you prepared a personal and 500 words. Follow those What happens next? If you chose to apstatement, sometimes colleges ask directions. You have done the ply early decision you will typically specific questions that cannot be aneasiest part and shown colleges know by the end of swered through your personal stateyou can follow directions ment. The best way to answer a speDecember whether you have been ac Tell the truth. Lying is a bad idea. cific question is to break it down into cepted. Colleges will send you three Colleges will know if the inforsmaller parts. Spelman College’s essay answers: accepted, declined, or waitmation is false. question for this year is listed below. listed. Don’t be discouraged. If you are waitlisted during early decision, Make sure you are sending the corQuestion: Seeking knowledge and comyou will be included in regular admisrect essay to the correct school. mitment to service are integral parts sion applications. Southern University admissions of the Spelman experience. Discuss office does not want to know why and illustrate the ways in which you Important Note: Do not only apply to Northern University is such a have shown your commitment to one early decision school. While we wonderful school or why you these areas. know you are amazing and any school would be happy there. Be careful would be crazy to decline admission, Breakdown: that you change the correct you don’t want to rely on one early How do you approach school when things when using the same esdecision application in case you are you may have difficulty grasping say for multiple schools. not admitted. a topic? Regular Decision: Regular decision applications often have later deadlines than early decision. This application does not require you to attend any specific college. This option has later notification and you may not know if you are accepted until March or April of the following year.

Why are you interested in the field you chose to major/study?

Accepted: Congratulations! The school wants you to join them in the fall of 2010 and become part of their class of 2014.

What do you plan to do to help you succeed in college?

Declined: The school did not admit you. Based on your application the admissions office does not feel you are a match for the university. It is not a reflection on your potential at another school, nor does it mean you weren’t good enough. Every school has a certain environment and the school may not be the most conducive environment to help you achieve your goals. Waitlisted: The school wants more time to decide. Maybe they want to interview with you over the phone or in person. They just want to know more about you. Take this opportunity to explain why you will be the

Why is education important to you? What kind of community service have you been a part of? What does it mean to give back to your community?

What about your learning habits/ skills and commitment to community would make you fit in at Spelman?

Other tips to make your application process a little easier: Make a list or spreadsheet. Include names of the universities/colleges, application questions, mode of application –mail, e-mail or online submission, any passwords you may have created for applications, deadlines, and the date you submitted the applications. This will help you keep organized. Create a checklist to help make sure you've submitted all components of your applications.

Overall, keep in mind that your col Organize your college application lege application essay is yours. While it recommendation letters accordmay not be good idea to try a new writing ingly. style for the first time on a college appli Request an unofficial high school cation, however, creativity is welcome. It transcript for your records and is most important to write in a style that check it for accuracy. is yours and that conveys who you are to A few more things to do to inform the readers. It is a way to tell admissions and enrich your application experiofficers your most important characterisence: tics in a short space. Introductions are • Take advantage of college fairs important and give readers a reason to and virtual tours. continue to the rest of your essay. Good • Talk to current students. Some introductions can begin with a quote or a schools offer opportunities to quirky statement about you. Here are a few more essay rules: Continued on page 41 www.GoddessGirlMag.com

by: Neferteri Johnson Teen Staff Writer

Usually, most high school students wait until their junior or senior to search and apply for college scholarships. Why wait until then, when you can get a head start? Students should start searching for scholarships freshman or sophomore year because more scholarship opportunities will be available to them. Some of you may be wondering what are college scholarships. Scholarships are a part of the three main types of financial aid to help fund your college career. The three main types are: grants/scholarships, work study, and loans. Grants and scholarships are the best things to receive when trying to pay for school. Unlike a loan, you DO NOT have to pay any money back when you receive a scholarship. Now, work study is another program that many college students use to pay for college. Work study is when a student works part-time during college and money received helps the student finance the cost of education and living expenses. Some students are not aware of the scholarships available to them. One of the best websites to start searching

for scholarships you are eligible for is www.fastweb.com. Fastweb.com can help you determine what scholarships best fit your current interests and those to be pursued in college. Another great website is www.finaid.com. On this website, you can not only search for scholarships but the website also gives great advice for essays, letters of recommendation, and tips for college entrance interviews. When completing the scholarship essay, it is best to brainstorm first. After you brainstorm, make an outline of what your essay will talk about. The most important thing is to be as creative as possible, because the administrators who read the essays have thousands more essays to read from other prospective students. When it comes to specific requirements for scholarships, it depends on that particular scholarship. A few requirements are grades: GPA average, SAT/ACT scores, extracurricular activities, and your basic background information. Starting your scholarship search early can allow you to have a greater chance of receiving one or more of these scholarships. So what are you waiting for? Go out and look for your ticket to success!

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

Last month, we brought you how to properly care for your skin and lay the right foundation, now we are going to introduce you to some ‘kolors’ that will bring out your best.

Kelli James-Paige Owner of Kelli Kolors “Adding Kolor to God-given Beauty”

Home Room - Makeup brushes: To get those flawless eyes that you see on many celebrities on the red carpet and beyond, you have to have the proper makeup brushes. We often think that the more expensive a product is, the better, so not true. You don’t have to spend all of your allowance on makeup brushes. To get a nice brush set, you can shop online at www.crownbrush.biz. I have been using these brushes for years and have not experienced one brush to come apart. These brushes are very soft and there is a variety to choose from depending on what you are trying to achieve. My favorite collection is the “Italian Badger Series” as seen here. 1st

Period – Let’s Base It:

So now, you have your brushes and you are ready to start having some fun with kolors. Before we begin, we want to use an eyeshadow base. The base acts as a mediator between your eye lids and the eyeshadow. The base is going to give the eyeshadow something to grab on too. It will help intensify the kolor as well as keep your eyeshadow on all day. The days of your eyeshadow creasing are of old. One of the most popular bases on the market is Urban Decay’s Primer Potion.

Urban Decay’s Primer Potion: This primer potion has the cutest packaging. It is shaped like a Jeanie bottle. Now how cute would it be to go in your purse or backpack at school on lunch break and pull out this cute little potion….everyone will want one! So when your friends ask you, “How is it that your eyeshadow stays in place all day even during all those gym activities the coach had us doing”? You can reply with, “It’s the Jeanie in the bottle baby”.

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

2nd Period - Choosing the Right Kolors for Your Eyes: Green Eyes Use kolors like deep purples/plums, lavender or burgundies to really make your green eyes pop. Try Urban Decay’s Deluxe Eyeshadow in Fishnet and Frigid. Kolors’ Tip: Using IB109 brush, apply UDDE in Fishnet all over the eye lid. This will give you a soft look with a little kolor. For a more dramatic look, using IB119 brush, apply a little of Frigid in the crease, moving your brush back and forth in a windshield wiper motion. Blue Eyes Use kolors like chocolate brown, taupe, copper and bronzes to really bring out the blue hues in your eye. Try Urban Decay’s Deluxe Eyeshadow in Shag and Heat. Kolors’ Tip: Using IB109 brush, apply UDDE in Shag all over the eye lid gradually fading into the crease for a nice wash of kolor before you head to class for a nice soft daytime look to bring out your eyes without looking made up.

Brown Eyes With brown eyes, your kolor choices are endless. But, if you want to do something really fun, try some blue shadows, you will be surprised how FIERCE that will look. Try Urban Decay’s Adore and Ruthless. Kolors’ Tip: When you are headed off to class and want to have a more natural look, you can just pop on some Fawn, using IB109 brush. The IB109 brush will allow you to apply your shadow more sparingly. If you find that Fawn is to dark for your complexion, mix a little of Scratch to lighten the kolor.

Hazel Eyes Since hazel eyes have a little green in them on the outer edges and then more of a golden brown in the inner, you can use kolors in the gold or green family to really bring the color forward. Purples are also a nice compliment. Don’t be afraid to mix kolors either. Try Urban Decay’s Honey mixed with Freakshow. Kolors’ Tip: Apply Honey to the lid of the eye using IB109 and gradually fade it into the crease for a daytime look while you are at school hitting the books. To bump your eyes up a notch after you have finished your studies and before you go to the movies with your friends, you can apply Freakshow ever so lightly in the crease of the eye using IB119. For a quick smokey eye, you can use the IB108 brush to apply Freakshow to your eyelid, lightly patting the kolor on your lid; you can layer to intensify the kolor even more.

Be on the look-out for my blog at KelliKolors.com, where I will provide you with more tips at www.KelliKolors.com www.GoddessGirlMag.com

Photographer: Terrence Blount Hairstylist: Tennia Williams (Ten Shades) Make-Up: Jâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Alise Wardrobe Stylist: Michelle Walker (Buppie Couture) Creative Director/Asst. Stylist: Robielle Foxx

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

Demure yet daring, this short blue dress from Mori Lee is the ideal party dress. The asymmetrical draping has a dressy look and feel while the lace up corset bodice and glitter gives the dress a fun and flirty feel. Perfect for homecoming or prom this short formal dress is affordable and stylish. Available at The Frock Shop / 1/877-FROCKS1 /

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

This sweet but sexy satin-faced taffeta short cocktail dress is perfect for homecoming, winter formals or graduation parties. The black and white color palette keeps it simple and the two-toned bow adds a fun twist. Available at The Frock Shop / 1-877-FROCKS1 / www.frockshopchicago.com

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

Wearing Celebrity High Fashion For Le$$ by Quinton Neal, Fashion Staff Writer Hello Ladies, This month we are going to take a look at Miss Taraji P. Henson. By checking out Ms. Henson’s style, we can get a few tips on how to dress more modern in today’s society. Trying to incorporate things to wear in today’s economy can be a little challenging, but I’m here to let you know that it’s not as hard as you think. FIRST STEP: Scope out some fashion magazines to update on what is in for the season. Trust me; it will help you make more fashionable decisions in the future. As you can see ladies, Ms. Henson is wearing a royal blue cotton trench coat that is belted at the waist. The coat has silver studded buttons on the edge of the coat, giving it more flare. Below the waist, she’s donning dark blue jeans with a cuff at the bottom, giving the look a little casual style as well. Ms. Henson’s feet is graced in black ballet shoes, which goes with her black clutch, and black scarf. Her silver jewelry gives off a more conservative appeal. As for makeup and hair, she illustrates a more natural shine with red lips, which indicates class. Well ladies, as you can see piecing an outfit together is not hard. Now I know your thing is “How Much is This Going to Coast?” Well let me tell you, it is not as expensive as you’re thinking. FIRST, let’s price check the royal blue trench coat. Like you may already have guessed, this coat may have cost her well over $200.00. I know your thinking “WHAT”, but wait… I’m here to let you know that you can find a similar coat at H&M, Burlington Coat Factory, or maybe even New York & Company for less. This will run you no more than $50-$65. NEXT is her black clutch which may have ran her over $100.00, but you can find this at Claire’s for no more than $12. LASTLY, let’s holler at the shoes. She’s definitely rocking the most common pair of footwear; the black ballet shoes. This particular designer may cost her about one-hundred dollar$, but for YOU it can cost no more than $30 at JC Penny. These three pieces will give you the tools necessary to begin your journey to the new look! Always remember to stay classy and sassy! www.GoddessGirlMag.com

by: Jasmyne McDonald Staff Writer In 2007, prior to the election, Time Magazine* covered Barack Obama’s views of youth national service. The Illinois Senator proposes a national-service program that would engage disadvantaged youth in energyefficiency and environmental work in their communities so that they could gain practical skills. We all know that the President is busy with healthcare and other stately duties. So, why wait for him to develop programs to enable you to better serve your community. Here’s how one young lady took her community into her own hands-even before the inauguration. She offers advice on how you can change your community, too. “Have you noticed any injustices in your neighborhood?” asked Lauryn Nwankpa and her friend Kelley Williams - both graduates of Evanston Township High School’s class of 2005. The two young ladies, who have since graduated from college, first decided they wanted to develop a program in high school. “Once we were in ‘The District’ (District 202) we began to see the discrepancies present within the school and with further investigation we realized that these discrepancies in achievement mirrored other broader discrepancies as well through the city as a whole,” Nwankpa said. Williams and Nwankpa wanted to eliminate the issues minorities were facing, but realized that many organizations already addressed the topics they wanted to address. Hence, their idea, the Evanston Black Summit was born. The Evanston Black Summit, or EBS, served as a space for many initiatives geared toward Evanston minorities to

Kelly!” Nwankpa explained. She is also meet their constituency and publicize able to apply the plantheir services. The duo ning skills she gained realized that people from planning EBS to weren’t served because other aspects of her they weren’t aware the life. She is grateful for services existed. Yet, her opportunity and their idea was not as simshares how other girls ple as talking about it. can do the same in “It was an uphill battheir communities. tle from day one,” Nwankpa and WilNwankpa stated. Having liams’ partnership is graduated from high key to their success. school and enrolled in “Partner with someone college, Nwankpa and who cares about the Williams planned EBS issue just as much as with a 2000-mile disyou do,” she said. Havtance between them. Lauryn Nwankpa and Kelley Williams ing someone there as The young ladies also you face the challenges and reap the refaced age discrimination. Many Evanswards is a great feeling. In doing so, do ton leaders lacked faith believing they not be afraid to use the people you know were, “too young and didn’t know what as resources to help you. There are we were doing,” Nwankpa said. many people who want to see young Not fazed, the ladies were more depeople succeed- reach out to them for termined to pull off their event. Utilizhelp. Nwankpa also warns against the ing resources such as their churches, idea that “you’re too young.” There isn’t National Pan-Hellenic sororities, and contacts from their old high school, they a better time than now; really make something of yourself. She also encourslowly garnered support. They credit ages young ladies to praise other girls John Rogers of Aerial Capitol one of for doing great things. She challenges their biggest supporters. Mr. Rogers came through with a location to hold the not to perpetuate “hating,” but to commit ourselves to praise and support one event. Even though, the team encounanother’s endeavors. tered many setbacks, they remained Even though, Williams and Nwankpa positive, “When things would go bad, had clear ideas of what they wanted to somehow we would just always end up cracking up laughing- we have this crazy do, Nwankpa gives advice on how to find projects in your neighborhood. sense of humor.” With that being said, they would not change anything about “Figure out what irks you most. What the process. keeps you up at night? What makes you With all of Williams and Nwankpa’s hard work, EBS went off without a hitch get into heated discussions with others? Those are the types of things/issues that in May 2007. Nwankpa approximates are best to wrap your brain around, 200 attendees at their event. Besides delve deeper into, decide your stance on, the sheer numerical success and attenand then tackle!” dance at their event, Nwankpa gained much more. Continued on page 41 “I learned so much about myself and www.GoddessGirlMag.com

by: Imani Watson Teen Staff Writer

ashamed of their hair and wear their Perms chemically alter the hair and natural hair for once. make it curlier. People with natuWhen Amber Borders, an rally straight hair People always throw around the 11th grade student at the would prefer perms. phrase, “You have good hair.” But, University of Chicago Straightening the hair what is good hair? Since Garrett A. is the job of a relaxer, Morgan invented the relaxer in 1910, Charter High School was asked if she relaxed her which AfricanAfrican-American hair hasn’t been hair, she answered, “Yes, American women use the same! Most African-Americans I definitely get a relaxer. to acquire straight hair. have hair that is course and tends to It just makes my hair easAlthough the end be kinky or tightly curled. Some result can be a marvel, women opt to get relaxers because it ier to deal with,” she explained. Amber is a prorelaxers do take a toll makes their hair manageable and fessionally-trained ballet on the hair. Some offers more styling options. While dancer and has been women have comsome celebrate the invention of the Lauren Hill wears her hair in curl twists. plained of excessive relaxer, others dishonor it. Nonethe- studying ballet for thirteen years. She said, “if I breakage after relaxing less, relaxers are omnipresent in didn’t keep my hair relaxed it would their hair. Aja West, an 11th grade Black society and they aren’t showlook messy all the time after ballet student at Queen of Peace High ing signs of leaving. practice.” School, remembered her bad experiWhen comedian/actor Chris Relaxed hair offers a variety of ence with a relaxer. “The last time I Rock’s daughter approached him looks and color options are endless. relaxed my hair, it broke off,” Aja with the question, “Daddy, how explained. She describes her hair as come I don’t have good hair?” he de- “Relaxed hair is easier [to manage] and I can do more with it then if I “fine” which is why she thinks it cided to do a little reporting on the didn’t get [a relaxer],” Amber conbroke off. “good hair” phenomenon. His curtinued. One reason women get relaxRelaxers affect each grade of hair rent film Good Hair, is a documeners is due to the versatility of the differently. Girls with fine, thin hair tary about the Black hair industry. hair when it is relaxed. Amber mentend to have more hair breakage afWhether women wear their hair retioned that her natural, tightly ter getting a relaxer than girls with laxed to weaves or dreads to a curly curled hair would look “poufy” all thicker hair. Most girls with fine hair afro; the hair care debate continues. the time if it weren’t for relaxers. say that the breakage occurs mainly Chris Rock is not the only celebTraditionaround the edges. rity attempting to ally, people While knowing the risks, why are crack the good hair have confused women still relaxing their hair? It all code. On the Septemthe terms goes back to the notion of having ber 8th, 2009 episode “perm” and “good hair”. When asked, most girls of The Tyra Show, “relaxer” as said curly/wavy hair is good Tyra Banks decided to interchangewhereas kinky/nappy hair is not. wear her “natural” able processes, They say having a relaxer makes hair instead of her but both have them feel more “glamorous” and the trademark weaves. very different media portrays it as more socially Tyra encouraged her Tyra Banks after she reveled her hair functions. acceptable. viewers to not be without weave.

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

Songstress Jill Scott wears her hair naturally curly.

“I don’t think having a relaxer means you look better,” Aja explained. “Natural hair is beautiful hair too.” Aja wears her hair in a natural, curly style. “Natural hair is easier in my opinion because I’m a swimmer and it’s always getting wet. Getting a relaxer would be pointless

for me and it harms my hair.” Vanessa Livingston, owner of Elegant Choice hair salon, shares her expertise on the issue. “Many times, women get relaxers but don’t take care of their hair properly.” Mrs. Livingston, a certified cosmetologist trained at John Amico School of Hair Design, has been doing hair for 24 years. She goes on to explain the hair relaxation process. “When relaxer, which is typically made of lye, is put onto the hair it breaks down the curly hair and chemically straightens it, making it permanently straight.” Some relaxers do not contain lye; however they do contain an alternative hairstraightening agent. Women often wonder which styl-

ing option is healthier for the hair. The most common misconception is that if hair is kept natural, it’s healthier. “In reality, both options are healthy options if you treat it correctly,,” said Livingston. Relaxed hair usually breaks off due to lack of moisturizing and conditioning. Relaxed or natural, if hair is kept up and conditioned properly, both choices are healthy ones. So which is better? That debate will continue for years to come. Whether hair is relaxed or natural, both styles are beautiful if properly taken care of. The answer is within the woman and how much work she is willing to put into her hair.

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

by: Angelique Boyd Teen Staff Writer

As teenagers in high school, our minds are in constant worry with everyday life; homework, friends, family, peer-pressure, and the opposite sex can drive us crazy. Although we are only seen as kids, we deserve time to relax and be pampered too! We have a lot on our plate, and a place like Citrin Spa and Wellness can bring about calmness. Citrin Spa and Wellness Center is located on 135 South Clinton Street, Chicago, Il. This place provides a calm, stress free atmosphere where you just want to take your shoes off and relax! Citrin services include hair care, facials, manicures, pedicures, scalp treatment, waxing, and massages! Citrin sends their customers out of their shop looking fly while simultaneously, ensuring healthy hair, nails, and skin. The employees welcome you into Citrin like it’s their home! You feel a special comfort once you enter the shop. I had the pleasure of interviewing the owner, Eugenia (Gina) BrownMerritt. Gina is very hard-working, intelligent, and passionate about hair care and her salon. I asked questions about the salon and one of the most important things girls are dying to know: hair tips. So sit back, relax, and get ready to fill your mind with new discoveries for the hair!

Q: Who thought of the name of your business? What is the significance of the name? A: My sister and I thought of the name. Citrine is a precious gemstone; we just took off the “e.” It means health and healing. I wanted the salon to be cozy and comfortable with no drama! Get your hair done, get your eyebrows done and get your feet done with no long waiting! I have been in the industry for 18 years and I have heard of drama so much! You hear gossip and people complaining and I didn’t want that in my salon. Q: Do you make your own products for hair? If so, what is the cost? A: No we don’t. We use all the popular products that can be used for all types of hair. Q: When was your salon founded? A: I have been working on the concept of the salon for three years but we opened July 21, 2008. Q: Does your salon help contribute to your community? How? A: Financially, we don’t contribute to the community , but we do contribute because the neighbors are so happy that we opened a salon to perform the services we offer in the neighborhood . I would say yeah, we

do contribute, giving people a place to relax and employing people. Q: What’s the best product to manage hair? Straighten your hair? Grow your hair? A: For managing your hair you would need to use shampoo and conditioner for your hair type. Don’t put too much stress on your hair, such as too much hair coloring and blow drying. Not putting too much stress on your hair cleanses the scalp and lets it be free. Don’t use products with high sodium or high alcohol in it. Try to use natural products. Q: Do you have any example of products that you can buy in the store? A: I only use professional hair products and the one I use a lot is Elucence. They have different products suitable for your hair type. A lot of African-American girls use Black products and you don’t always have to do that. You need to know you hair type. Q: What’s the best type of weave to make your hair look natural? A: My advice would be going to someone who knows what they are doing. There are different types of Continued on page 41 www.GoddessGirlMag.com

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

by: Tiara Wilkinson Contributing Writer

are allergic to the latex material of • The condoms - there are alternatives for biggest that allergy - and condoms have the concern You cannot escape it. They talk rare occurrence of breaking or slipwith taking the pill is that they have about it on television, sing about it on ping off during sexual activity. to be taken correctly! You can’t pop the radio, give you tips about it in • Even though condoms are worn them like an aspirin. It is crucial to magazines, use it to sell clothes at the by guys, if you’re thinking of partici- their effectiveness that they are taken mall... Everywhere you turn, every day at the same time. there it is. Your friends swap When this is done pills are 99% stories about it, some of effective in preventing pregthem are doing it, your guy nancy when taken correctly.*If might want you to do it, and you slip up occasionally, they you can’t help it – you think are 92% effective. The birth conabout it. Sex has seeped into trol pill is 0% effective in keepvirtually every area of our ing you from getting STDs. Yes, lives. Thinking about sex is you read correctly, they cannot one thing, but actually jumpkeep you from catching a dising in and participating ease! So, many women choose opens up a whole new list of Source: thefreshxpress.com/2009/03/3705/ to take birth control and still things to think about. pating in sex, you need to have your use condoms in order to increase ARE YOU PROTECTED? their measure of safety. own condoms on hand. You don’t Having sex puts you at risk of get- want to end up in a situation where Other Methods: There are a lot ting pregnant and/or catching sexu- you don’t have protection. Better to more options out there in addition to ally transmitted diseases. The only be safe, than sorry. the condom and birth control. There way to be 100% safe is to be abstiis also the birth control patch (Ortho • Birth Control Pill: Another nent. However, there are numerous Evra), vaginal ring (NuvaRing), birth way to be prepared is birth control. ways that you can protect yourself control shot (Depo-Provera), sponge This involves taking a daily pill to when having sex. regulate hormones in your body. This (Today Sponge), cervical cap Condoms: This is the #1 way most people choose to protect themselves. When used correctly, condoms are about 98% effective in preventing pregnancy.* Condoms also reduce the risk of you catching a disease, but the chances of contracting a disease are still possible. Condoms are relatively cheap, and many health facilities give them out for free. There are few drawbacks to using condoms, although some girls find out that they

•

will help to reduce the chance of becoming pregnant. You will have to visit a gynecologist and have a pap smear in order to utilize this method, and you’ll have to pony up the cash for your monthly supply of pills (from $15 to $50 a month). Since birth control pills are interacting with your hormones, you could have spotting between periods, nausea, and/or changes in your cycle while taking them.

(FemCap), diaphragm, female condom, IUD, and emergency contraception.* All of these methods have different levels of effectiveness in preventing pregnancy and STDs, and they all have different side effects. You should talk with your parents and see a health care professional for more information. WHAT’S THE DANGER? Okay. You’re taking precautions and protecting yourself. But you still need www.GoddessGirlMag.com

your immune system to malfunction, so that it’s harder for your body to fight off infections or disease. About 40,000 people get this infection every year.* AIDS stands for Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome. It is the last and most serious Gonorrhea affects about 600,000 stage of HIV. There is no cure for people per year in America. It’s an AIDS, and 980,000 people have been infection that can be found in sexual diagnosed with the disease in the US organs and/or the throat. The big – millions have been stricken worldcatch with this disease is that most wide.* people who have it don’t experience Like the other STDs, HIV is able to any symptoms. So, you can have sex hideout in your body without giving with someone who can pass it on to you any notice that it’s there. But the you without either of you having a disease can cause exhaustion, muscle clue. aches, and headaches. AIDS affects The most common symptoms women the body in so many different ways. It have with gonorrhea are: abdominal causes severe yeast infections, deep pain, fever, painful urination, throw- coughing, bleeding from growths on ing up, a yellowish vaginal discharge, the skin, numbness in the hands and painful intercourse, and abnormali- feet, and many other things. ties with the menstrual cycle. These If a person has HIV/AIDS, they can symptoms are often mild which is make changes to their lifestyle, diet, why many people don’t recognize and take medications to help slow that they have the disease. But, if infections. Even with HIV, it is possigonorrhea goes untreated it can ble for a person to have a long, fulcause complications with pregnancy, filled life. infertility (you won’t be able to get Other Diseases In addition to the pregnant), and it can cause arthritis STDs listed, having sex also exposes you to Hepatitis B, Syphilis, Chlamyand skin sores. Gonorrhea is easily treated with an antibiotic from your dia, scabies, pubic lice, pelvic inflammatory disease, and others. health care provider. to be aware that having sex exposes you to the risk of catching a sexually transmitted disease. Most STDs are treatable with the correct medications and others can stay with you for life.

Herpes is a common disease that can infect your mouth and/or your genitals. It causes blisters or cold sores on the infected area. Just like gonorrhea, you don’t always have symptoms with herpes. When they do show up, the symptoms can last 2 to 4 weeks. This infection can be treated with medication, but there is no cure.

•

HIV/AIDS HIV is the virus that causes AIDS. HIV stands for Human Immunodeficiency Virus. It causes

READY TO BE A MOMMY? You’ve got protection. You’re on alert for STDs. But, there’s one more thing you have to consider when having sex. It’s actually the technical reason why people are supposed to have sex – having babies! Getting pregnant is a huge step that should occur when a person has a lot of support – physical, financial, and mental. Far too often, this is not the case. However, it is possible. The question is: Are you

ready to go down that path? If you choose to have sex, that possibility is out there. IT’S NOT REALLY SEX… IS IT? Oral Sex Many girls (and women) don’t believe that oral sex is actually sex. Since a person can’t get pregnant from it, they don’t take as many precautions. Most don’t choose to use protection at all because they think it doesn’t matter. The reality is, it’s not as casual as kissing someone (like many girls would like to think). Oral sex is a form of SEX! When a person engages in oral sex, they are still at risk to many STDs (including HIV). One needs to take just as much caution with oral sex as they do with traditional sex. WHAT’S YOUR MOTIVATION? So, sex seems to be everywhere and it may feel like everyone is in on the action. You may feel left out of the conversations or think you are missing out because you haven’t done anything. Contrary to popular belief, everyone who has the space and opportunity is not engaging in sexual activity. You don’t need to put pressure on yourself to go any faster than what is best for you. You are not alone! If you are making yourself move forward against your true feelings – do yourself a favor and slow down. Sex is not something you should do because you feel left out. Sex also should not be entered because someone else is pressuring you to join in. Taking that step is a huge decision, one that only YOU can make. And anyone that would try to make you do something against your will probably doesn’t have your best Continued on page 41 www.GoddessGirlMag.com

by: Soraya L. Walton, Licensed Practical Nurse Contributing Writer

Psst! Girl look at her! She needs to go holla at whoever put that bogus weave in her head and get her money back. Yeah girl, and look at those shoes, they don’t even match that dress. That is not a good look. Unfortunately, these types of conversations go on all day and every day; whether at the mall, salon, grocery store, school, workplace, and many other places women are. I have had my fair share of this mess and I’m sure some of you have experienced this type of negative behavior from other girls as well. I can remember walking in a room full of strangers looking good, feeling good, and smelling good. The next thing I know some random girl blurts out, “Something stinks!” I’m thinking to myself, “I know she is not referring to my $100.00 a bottle of perfume.” Or what about the time I was in the mall, looking at this cute dress, debating if I should break the bank and splurge. I decided I really could not afford it and put the dress back on the rack. As soon as I put it back, here we go again. Some random girl picks up the same dress and blurts out, “This is ugly, like who would buy this?” Somebody please help me understand, is it insecurity, ignorance, or both? My ex would always say, “Women check each other out harder than men do.” He is absolutely right. It’s as if, when we see another woman who we feel may look better, dress better, or just appear to have it together, some of us can’t resist the urge to say something negative. Ladies, get that “green-eyed monster” under control, because a lot of you are out of control. Insecurity breeds jealousy. So, if you are one of these girls who always has something negative to say about other girls, especially random girls you don’t know, you need to take a hard look in the mirror and figure out where your insecurity is stemming from. Maybe society has told you that your features are not beautiful. Maybe

you are dealing with abandonment issues from an absentee father, or maybe you are the girl who can’t afford designer clothes. Whatever your issue might be, you should acknowledge that there is an issue and figure out what you need to do to conquer your insecurities. Seeing yourself as God sees you is a step in the right direction. There is room for all of us and we are all unique and special. As my grandmother would say, “God don’t make no junk.” Random mean girls are very easy to brush off. They try to knock you off your square momentarily, but it doesn’t work. However, what happens when you know the mean girl? You are not friends with her but you may know her from work, school, the salon, etc. Unlike the random mean girl I mentioned earlier, this mean girl has the potential to hurt you. Unfortunately, mean girls can be grown women with children of their own, age should equal maturity but often times it does not. I must say the mean girls I have encountered as an adult supersedes my experiences with them as a teenager, growing up on the south side of Chicago. A few years ago, I patronized a salon located in the mall where I like to shop. I liked the atmosphere of the salon but what I liked most was the location. One day, I was in the salon for a routine appointment and I noticed a middle aged woman, who looked very familiar. I could not place her face, but I knew her from somewhere. Towards the end of my service, she was seated at a hair dryer right across from the chair I was seated. As my stylist put the finishing touches on my hair, I remembered where I knew her from. She was a patient in the substance program I previously worked for. The first thing you are told when you start working in the field of substance abuse is you never acknowledge a patient in public because you to protect their privacy. We are required to wait for the patient to acknowledge us first. Well, she never acknowledged me, and my service was complete. I tipped my stylist, paid my bill, booked my next appointwww.GoddessGirlMag.com

ment for the day before my son’s first birthday and was out the door. What was in store for me my next visit was unbelievable. It was the day before my son’s first birthday. So ,I was running around trying to get everything done and I was running out of time. The last thing on my list for the day was my appointment at the salon. From the moment I checked in with the receptionist, the climate was very cold and uninviting. All eyes on me, people were pointing, staring, whispering and clearly this was not a figment of my imagination and I am not paranoid. I have been a client at this salon for three years, and something was gravely wrong. My stylist had recently left the salon, so I was a new client of the stylist doing my hair. While my hair was being shampooed another stylist entered the shampoo area and blurted out, “Did you take your medicine today?” then walked away. When she said that, I knew instantly what was going on. The medicine she was referring to was methadone. It is taken orally to treat heroin addiction. The patient I saw in the salon a few weeks ago was a patient in the substance abuse program I previously worked for; clearly she flipped it! It was more than obvious she told someone in the salon that I was the addict, and we all know bad news travels fast. I could not believe this was happening, and unfortunately it’s about to get worse. My drive home was a blur. I just could not stop thinking about what happened in the salon. Then my cell phone rings it was the same stylist that made that bogus comment. This woman had the audacity to call me and ask me if I took her leather jacket by mistake because her jacket is missing. I was stunned that this woman had this much nerve. I told her, “I came in with a blue jacket and left with a blue jacket, the store has security cameras, go look at it!” I will never know the real reason why that woman lied on me, but I understand her pain. Maybe I made her mad one day, or maybe she wanted me to walk in her shoes and feel some of her pain, shame, and humiliation. Maybe she thought I would expose her. Even if I wanted to, I could not. She is protected under The Privacy Act, and I cannot breech patient confidentiality. Gossiping about someone’s misfortunes is not worth losing my licensure. I have a toddler at home. Like I said, I understand her pain, but what I don’t un-

derstand is the behavior of the staff at that salon. All it took was for some random client to say I was suffering from an addiction and everybody believed her. It baffles me to this day. At this point, I began to wonder what was it about me that would cause anyone to see me as a heroin addict. I never ran out without paying my bill, nor did I ever request half a service for half the price, nor did I ever have an excuse as to why I could not pay. After patronizing this salon for three years that’s all it took, was some random person telling a fantastic lie. At the end of the day, the bottom line is those women wanted to believe that, in some way it made them feel good to be able to say, “She ain’t nothing but a fiend!” Come on ladies we can do better. Stop all this madness and mayhem. Tearing the next woman down is only putting a bandage on the real problem. I challenge each and every one of you to be better than that. Stop listening to believing and perpetuating garbage about one another. It’s extremely non productive and damaging to the soul. To the young women who are on the receiving end of this kind of maliciousness, keep your head up. You don’t have to defend yourself; your character will stand in your defense. Remember this, reputation is what you are supposed to be, character is what you are. In closing, I guess you want to know if I went back to that salon. Yes, I went back a few more times but I never saw the stylist who called me or the woman that lied on me. The irony was The Privacy Act protected the woman who lied on me, but who protected me? Join Us on the discussion at www.GoddessGirlMag.com in the “GoddessTalk” section: Have you ever been the target of a "mean girl" or Have you ever been the "mean girl"? In either case, how did that experience make you feel?

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

by: Jasmyne McDonald We’ll call her Yolanda. She is 21 with Staff Writer a three-year-old daughter. Our mutual

High school guys can appear to be immature. They don’t really understand you. Furthermore, it is a proven fact that girls mature faster than boys- well maybe not proven, but clearly evident. You buy this cute new outfit from that store you saw in Goddess Magazine’s last issue. Your hair is freshly done. You even tried that new makeup Gabrielle Union advertises in those commercials. You’re all set to garner the attention of all the males in your class, but instead they talk about Sunday night football, tell you your heels look funny, and ask you why your eyelids are purple. IMMATURE! Well, you looked cute for yourself, but it would have been nice if the guy you’ve been watching since the first day of school had noticed. You’re frustrated with the guys at your school, so when Marcus, the guy who graduated 3 years ago, tells you how good you look at the bus stop after school you decide that he’s a sign from the heavens. Maybe, you are only to date older men. He follows up with flattery that you’ve heard before, but it just sounds different coming from him… Better. Your ego gets a major boost, but there is something sketchy about him. Older guys seem to know all the right things to say, have cars, and can take you to nicer places than your high school crushes can, but none of that is worth the baggage they bring. That is because they have experience. They have tried all of those lines on ladies their own age. This experience is not attractive. Experience equals expectations; expectations that a lack of experience cannot meet. I want to share a story about a friend of a friend.

friend described her to me, “She earned good grades in high school, became a manager at her job by the time she was 18, and was headed for college until she met him.” Yolanda was working at her part-time job as the manager of a fast food chain when she met him. He began to pay her attention and told her he was 22. While that was a four year difference at the time, Yolanda decided he would be acceptable to hang out with. Their hanging out turned into a more serious relationship very quickly and Yolanda found herself, declining a fouryear, full-ride college scholarship in order to stay near her new older boyfriend. Shortly after, Yolanda decided to become intimate with her older boyfriend. He quickly introduced her to his family and talked often about his college experiences. She felt things were going well until his stories did not add up. First, her older beau’s age steadily increased. The initial age of 22, that Yolanda believed turned into 24, then 28, and eventually late 30s- creating a nearly 20 year age difference. He was old enough to be her father. Shortly after revealing his age, Yolanda learned that her older guy knew key information about his supposed alma mater, but that he not only did not graduate, he never attended. He had only brushed up on key knowledge, but had no educational background. Rather, he had been in the penitentiary prior to his and Yolanda’s relationship. The convicted felon failed to share this information about his past with his new girlfriend. Unfortunately, by the time Yolanda was aware of this information, she was pregnant with his child, dealing with domestic violence disputes, and his infidelities with other young ladies from her

high school. Now, three years later, Yolanda is raising her three year old son- without the help of her older ex-boyfriend. He does not aid in the financial support of her child nor is he physically present in her son’s life. Over the last few years, as Yolanda tried to make a life for herself on her own- working, living in her own apartment, not going to college, and supporting her family alone- she has had a few dangerous encounters with her ex including him threatening her life and a return stint in prison. There were signs that Yolanda’s “Mister Right” was a bad influence on her. Here are some of the signs to be aware of when approached by older men. Bad qualities of older-men, younger women relationships: • He rushes the relationship. One day you’re hanging out, and then he’s planning your family life together. Older men tend to be ready for mature relationships. That is a casualty of age and being at different phases in life • He is controlling. One of the main reasons guys pursue younger ladies is to manipulate them. Older guys know their charm is appealing and often use it as leverage over younger girlfriends • He doesn’t pay you any attention. Some guys just want to see how many girls they can juggle. If a guy is only paying you attention when no one else is paying him attentionlet him go. You deserve someone to be attentive at all times. • He’s always buying you things. Some older guys will Continued on page 41 www.GoddessGirlMag.com

prehend this lesson, TRU teaches that about coming together in fellowship, your background, age, and prior misthere are times that can be challenging. takes does not matter because you will Building solid bonds with the teens in Amongst the many outalways have be part church and personally connecting with standing individual people of Christ. them is a challenging task for the youth and groups that have conTRU promotes leaders of TRU. tributed to their communitheir mission by inEveryone has their own situations ties—and who have been viting others to come and battles to deal with and the TRU featured in Goddess Magato TRU and additeam leaders do their best in assisting zine, the Chicago TRU tional outside events. those who need help. Along with steerMinistry is ranked as being They encourage ing the youth on the right track they a great contributor to the members to teach make themselves available to help every youth. others about Christ brother and sister in Christ with whatTru is a youth ministry through TRU, as well ever dilemma they are having. With through Life Changers as live their own life every good deed comes a reward, which Church for teens in grades according to the in this case, would be the change in 7th through 12th. The name Word of God. Team teen’s attitudes and mindsets about life is an acronym that stands Leader, Rashad Mor- and Christ. The testimonies and lifted Tru Ministry’s Team Leaders for “The Real You”. Inside ris, states that, you spirits are evidence of Christ working in of this youth ministry, no one is exhave to be, “not only hearers but also the lives of young people. This is also cluded from being a child of God and a doers of the Word.” The significance in evidence of the vision of TRU being joint heir in Christ. In Life Changers being a doer of the Word is to live what achieved, which is to get through to Church before anything else, this is who you believe and to be more teens and fuel you are. The TRU ministry coveys that of assistance to oththeir spiritual conthis is your true identity, the real you ers who do not yet nection with God. within Christ is their mission. know who they really Once again, Every other Sunday the TRU minisare and to those who Goddess Magazine try meets. This group’s outstanding fall astray. In doing commends TRU message about Christianity and the imthis, you and others members and its pact have on the youth have inspired receive a better perdevoted leaders for many teens to look towards the church ception of what it creating an atmosfor guidance. The team leaders of TRU means to follow phere where teens has done an exceptional job in promotChrist. can thrive, love and Tru Ministry at Malcolm X College ing the TRU ministry’s mission, as well TRU Team Leader, learn from the lesas preparing teens to be better leaders Melissa Morris, states that, “there is sons communicated in TRU through the and committed children of God. The nothing impossible to achieve.” This is Word of God. As the TRU ministry mission is to alter the lives of the youth why TRU team leaders encourages the grows, we hope the visions for TRU are by providing them with the word of God. members of TRU to bring friends along put into action and expanded. If you are Once you realize the mission and so they too can benefit from their teach- interesting in attending the TRU minisapply it in your life, you can effectively ings. By doing this, others have received try or learning more, you can visit TRU’s progress spiritually in the Lord. Recogthe salvation of Christ (Saved). Their official website at www.therealu.org or if nizing who you really are in Christ is one involvement in the church has increased you are on Facebook or Twitter you can of the great blessings, as well as one of and blessings have occurred more frevisit these links Facebook Group-TRU the most important lessons learned in quently. However, along with all of the Chicago and Twitter-www.twitter.com/ TRU. In order to get the youth to compositive energy in this youth ministry truchicago for more about TRU to improve your vision of the real you. by: Rana Tuggle Teen Staff Writer

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

10/19/09 Journal Entry #5

Dear Entertainment, What’s up! It’s your girl, Miss B! As always I’m here to discuss the latest and greatest of your world. As everyone knows hip-hop music is one of my favorite genres of music and lately I’ve noticed that women are missing in hip-hop. I can remember a time when female rappers were dominating the music charts and radio stations. Female rappers like Missy Elliot, Eve, Lil Kim and Foxy Brown had me believing that I could be a rapper too. I knew every song, lyric, beat, everything. Those ladies gave hope to a young girl dreaming to make it big in a world dominated by men. They made it cool to be aggressive and feminine all in one. Now, without any female presence in hip-hop, what does the future hold for women in the industry? Well, don’t hurt yourself thinking of an answer because I have found a young lady who has the potential to make some noise for the ladies and bring some femininity to the world of hip-hop. 19- year-old Detroit native, Terra “Lady Te” Twymon, has what it takes to become a leading force for young women in hip-hop. Breaking into the music scene at the tender age of nine, Lady Te adds her flavor through writing her own lyrics and performing. Her rhymes consist of what’s going on in her daily life. “I keep it real. I write my own songs and I write from my heart,” Lady Te stated. Gaining inspiration from the 90’s female R&B group, TLC and late rapper Lisa “Left Eye” Lopes, Lady Te developed her no holds barred style from listening to Left Eye’s songs. “I got all of her albums. I like her style and her originality is what appeared to me; she didn’t care about what others thought of her,” Lady Te expressed. Releasing her first album in 2006, Terra-Fied shows her different style. With slow jam “Back Hallway” and dance-friendly “Do the Hurricane,” Lady Te illustrates the range of her musical talents. Although Lady Te has been in the music industry for almost 10 years, she too has noticed the lack of female representation. “The music industry needs more female rappers,” stated Lady Te. “We [females] always have something to prove.” Lady Te is currently working on new projects to boost her presence in the industry. She is featured on fellow Detroit R&B crooners K’Jon’s track “What’s Really Good,” a feel good joint. Recently starting her own record label, G’d Up Records, she’s in the studio working on her upcoming mix tape Grind Time scheduled for release in spring 2010. Listening to Lady Te, I couldn’t help but reminisce of the days when female rappers such as Da Brat, Lil Kim, Eve, and Foxy Brown were separating themselves from their male counterparts. These women backed down to no man with there hardcore lyrics and street demeanors and going toe-to-to with the biggest rappers of their time. The female MC position is open and taking all resumes. Lady Te’s strong work ethic, knowledge of the rap game, and skills will make you think twice about doubting her qualifications for bringing females back to where they need to be…on TOP!! Be sure to check out Lady Te’s music. You can holler at her on MySpace; myspace.com/ladyte, Twitter: twitter.com/ladyte, and if you wanna learn how to do the “hurricane go,” check out the video on Youtube; youtube.com/ladyte. Well, I’m heading out but if there is a new artist that you want me to feature or celebrity that you are interested in reading about, don’t hesitate sending an email to missb@goddessgirl.com. Okay, until next time.

Your Girl, Miss B! www.GoddessGirlMag.com

Noelle Dresden stepped out on faith and left her full-time job to pursue her passion: singing. Six months later, her singing career hasn't gone much of anywhere and neither has her relationship with her charismatic, yet sneaky boyfriend, Jonah. Although Jonah loves Noelle, he’s not willing to give her the commitment and ring she so desperately wants. After Jonah uses Noelle’s hopes of an engagement for his benefit, Noelle gets fed up and decides to move forward with her career…with or without Jonah. Her pursuit leads her to accept an invitation to be a

house guest on the popular, hit reality show, House of Swag. On the show, aspiring entertainers with the potential to take it to the next level are trained to become multifaceted mega stars. While in the house, Noelle catches the eye of the show’s creator, Monroe "Paper" Chase. He uses his good looks and smooth talk to charm her, then he uses his money and power to attempt to subtract Jonah from the equation. Drama only escalates when Noelle has to deal with an envious, hating house guest who is not beyond trying to bring Noelle down to get ahead. As Noelle rises toward super stardom, she has some difficult choices to make. What lies ahead of her looks so much better than what she has left behind. Will she work to keep the love that she and Jonah shares alive, or will she choose fame, fortune and a man who can make all of her dreams come true?

To purchase this book or for more book titles, please visit www.monicamariejones.com!! Monica Marie Jones is an author whose published works include The Ups and Downs of Being Round (Fiction/Self -Help), Taste My Soul (Poetry) and FLOSS (Urban Fiction). She is a contributing author in Chicken Soup for the Girls Soul, New Directions for Youth Development, and 44th (A full color coffee table book about President Barack Obama that is a compilation of front page reprints of actual African-American published newspapers and poetry.) She has also contributed to several publications and youth development training materials for the High/Scope Educational Research Foundation. She has worked as a columnist and freelance writer for various publications and websites including the Michigan Front Page Newspaper and is an active member of the Motown Writer's Network where she is the host of her own show, “Marketing and Motivation Mondays with Monica Marie Jones” on the Michigan Literary Network Radio. Monica received her Bachelor’s Degree and teaching certificate in Elementary Education from Eastern Michigan University. She also received her Masters of Social Work from the University of Michigan. Monica is a youth development expert that does training and consultation for the Center for Youth Program Quality (a joint venture of the Forum for Youth Investment and The High/Scope Educational Research Foundation.) She is a professionally trained dancer and dance instructor that has danced with Gospel recording artists such as Dorinda ClarkCole, in several venues around the United States, and a three-city tour in Japan with Kierra 'Ki-Ki' Sheard. Monica uses her gifts, talents and expertise to inform her work as a motivational speaker with a focus on topics including by not limited to self-esteem, empowering women and girls, fitness and wellness, and youth development. Monica’s next novel, SWAG (Urban Fiction) will be released in September 2009. Her essay, “Don’t Wait for the Weight” and her poem, “Fat Girl” will be published in The Souls of Our Young Sisters: The Next Generation of Women Tell Their Stories, Overcome Their Challenges, and Heal Their Spirits (Souls of My Sisters Inc./Kensington Publishing Corp.) anthology in March 2010. For more information visit her website at www.monicamariejones.com or email her monica@monicamariejones.com

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

MAGAZI E

Are you interested in writing, photography, or modeling? If so, Goddess magazine is looking for you!! Send us a email with your name, phone number, and age. Let us know what you are interested in. Contact us TODAY at Info@goddessgirlmag.com.

Do you know a young lady who has been outstanding in school or that is always helping in her community? Goddess Magazine is looking to feature a young woman in our GoddessStar section. This section is dedicated to recognize young women between the ages of 1414-18 who has made changes, big or small, to better herself or her community. If you would like to nominate a young lady, please submit a 350 words or less essay describing her accomplishments. All nominations are due by November 16, 2009.

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

The Goddess Within DON’T HATE – APPRECIATE! By Tiara Wilkinson She’s got the finest guy in school talking to her. You’ve been banned from dating until you graduate college. She’s got all the latest clothes, and looks like a model rocking them. You still get the one size too big, hand-me-downs from your older cousin. She gets amazing grades and always makes the honor roll. You study until your eyes ache and still only manage to get C’s. At times it may seem like you can’t measure up. Other girls appear to have so much more going for them than you do. They are living the good life, while you are stuck on the sidelines. They get all the glory, and you sit in the shadows. Despite how you may feel about yourself, God thinks you’re pretty special. When He finished creating the world, He saw that it was very good. (Genesis 1:31) After creating you, He felt the exact same way. Think about it. He took the time to create YOU: a one of a kind, exclusive edition girl. No one else has your face, laugh, habits, or personality. He even picked your individual family - no matter how irritating they are - to help you become the best YOU ever! Search the entire world: there’s not another YOU anywhere. In Jeremiah 29:11, God says: I know the plans I have for you…plans for good…to give you a future and a hope. He created you for a reason, one that should give you something to be proud of and look forward to even if you don’t know what it is yet. Your future is bright! God has created a good plan just for you! And don’t think of the future as some far off time when you’re old. Your future is as close as next week, tomorrow, even the next hour! Sometimes we can focus on the things we dislike so much that we begin to forget the things we do appreciate. Take a moment to remember what you love about being you. God put those things there to make you stand out, and you should be grateful for them. Psalm 139:14 says it best: Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous... So, yes… She may be living the fabulous life that you can only dream about. But God thought enough of YOU that he took the time to create YOU just for his pleasure. (Psalm 139:16) He designed a special plan that only YOU can achieve. YOU are his rare, individual treasure in this world, so hold your head high!

WHAT MAKES YOU A MODERN GODDESS? BY: Quinessa T. Solomon Traditionally, a goddess is a female of either supernatural powers that is worshipped by many, or a woman of great beauty and grace. Today, these definitions still hold true. What makes me a Modern Goddess? I exemplify various admirable characteristics. I continue to make countless efforts to maintain beauty and grace, but also individual style, sophistication, elegance, and more importantly, health. Though I may not be equipped with supernatural powers, I have accomplished many goals including graduating college with a Bachelors Degree, working full-time and also part-time jobs and nurturing and impacting today’s youth. Despite my achievements, I avoid selfimportance and am appreciative for each blessing. I may be a goddess, but my good fortune truly comes from God. Being a goddess is not always demonstrated through physical beauty; it can also be expressed from within. I am a modern goddess because in the face of adversity, I prevail, when called on by loved ones, I answer and when someone or something makes an effort to provide new knowledge, I listen and learn. Obstacles are presented daily in an attempt to distract me from continuing down the path toward success. My strength and determination motivate me to overlook these difficulties. I constantly seek to raise my awareness and heighten my understanding as I walk down my path to womanhood. “Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we should dance.” Many goddesses of Greek Mythology had a distinguishable gift--Aphrodite, The Goddess of Love and Beauty, Athena, The Goddess of Wisdom and War. I am a modern goddess, Quinessa, The Goddess of Delight, because I have the ability to provide excitement, love and laughter to anyone who may be deprived of it. I find pleasure in seeing people happy-whether family or strangers. I also love to

smile, so I try to keep others smiling when they are around me. Everyone needs a good laugh-it’s good for the spirit. I’m no professional comedian and I don’t have a melodic voice, but if telling jokes or singing a song will bring joy to someone else, then I’m all for it. Tomorrow is not promised, so living for today is essential.

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

LIBRA September 23-October 22

SCORPIO

It is YOUR month Ms. Libra, don’t be afraid to show some anger towards those giving you a hard time at school. You may not know how to express your feelings, but bottling them is not the answer. YOUR comfort matters!

October 23 - November 21

A friend is not telling you something that they’re hiding. Try not to get into their business. You, Ms. Scorpio, like to find things out that may not be your business. You can be nosy! You love to be in control! Respect privacy. This might make friends trust you more.

SAGITTARIUS November 22-December 21

CAPRICOR

You and your best girlfriends are having a girl talk. You expressed your opinion but your friends do not agree. Don’t go crazy and flip out!! Sagittarians don’t like when people don’t agree with them and WILL argue to prove their point. Everybody has their own opinion and you might lose friends if you don’t accept that.

December 22-January 19

School is getting harder and you’re scheduling each day so you can be successful in your studies. You like to work hard, but you need some time for play too. Make sure you make time for homecoming, to hang out with family and friends. Relax!

AQUARIUS January 20-February 18

PISCES February 19-March 20

Aquarius, you want to help people, but you don’t know how! You can always Ms. Pisces, this month you are going help people with little things; smiles, to feel extra nice and kind! For some comfort, or helping a senior citizen reason, you are very happy! You are a very caring person, but don’t let with groceries. Don’t think because you’re young that you can’t make a dif- people take advantage of your kindference. You can make a club for recyness. Realize who your real friends cling or talking about politics. are. .

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

ARIES March 21-April 19

It is the season of Homecoming and you want to make sure you have much fun! On the day of, help your friends get over their shyness on the dance floor. Aries are leaders, so it is natural for you to help your friends come out of their shell! No dates? Show the fun in being a single lady! But don’t force them into something they don’t want to do. Be understanding.

TAURUS April 20-May 20

GEMI I

When your friends need advice on something, BE there for them; whether it is about boys, school, homecoming, or life. And, when people are giving you advice you need to be willing to listen. Taurus can be stubborn!

May 21-June 21

When you meet that cute boy; you will want to get to know him when he shows June 22-July 22 interest. You like to build relationships and get to know people, but don’t shove You are very clever when it comes to questions down his throat! Give it time. what you want and how to get it. Put The same goes for friends; you might that talent to good use instead of heading towards the dark side. You could scare them away! use this skill to make someone help you study, get fashion advice for homecoming or any advice. Make sure you don’t hurt anybody in the process.

CA CER

LEO

July 23-August 22

You have found the perfect dress for homecoming and what do you see when you look in the mirror? A sexy mama! Leos are known for their confidence and you can’t wait to show off your look. Keep the self-love down though. You don’t want to seem to boastful, do you?

VIRGO August 23-September 22

A friend or family member is probably going to make a stupid decision and you definitely don’t agree with it! Don’t yell in their face or put them down. You LOVE to be straight up critical when it comes to helping people but that can just discourage people from asking you for help! Instead try to listen to their reasoning and take it from there.

Source: http://www.astrology.com/allaboutyou/ www.GoddessGirlMag.com

3221 N Sheffield Ave Chicago, IL 60657 (773) 904-8735 www.shopbadc.com

Jennifer Burrell Founder / President The Frock Shop, Inc. 877.FROCKS1 www.frockshopchicago.com

Interested in featuring your boutique in the next issue of Goddess Magazine? Contact us today at info@goddessgirlmag.com!

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

I am Superwoman Continued from page 11 and getting their feet wet. She declares Joshua as her best friend and does not let the demands of being a college student destroy the relationship she has with her on. “There are definitely days when I’m frustrated, tired, and feel the weight of the world on my shoulders,” says Yasmine, “and it’s not necessarily Josh. It’s just me, but I have to remember that none of that is Josh’s fault. Your life, with or without a child is going to be difficult, but you have to keep that separate from your child.” Williams has accomplished great things since Joshua’s birth. She’s excelling high in the clouds by making

the dean’s list at NU and writing and producing her own plays. As a playwright, Williams is able to handle some of her frustrations through writing. She has recently tried her luck in the modeling world as well. Her son is enrolled in school and achieving excellent grades. Williams attributes her success to having a supportive family. “There isn’t anything that my family doesn’t think I’m capable of, which is probably why I had the mentality during my pregnancy that I can do anything,” says Yasmine. “When I talk to girls, I always want to let the mothers know do not give up on your child. They still can, and still will succeed if you continue to be there for your child.”

Joshua has been Williams’ reason to fight harder to attain her dreams, and wants other young women not to fall victim to the stereotypes of being a teen parent. Wanting to teach ambitious students, like her, Williams is working towards achieving her goals—soon to be completing her Bachelors degree this upcoming June. Aim high, dream high, and you shall fly high like a superwoman. “There’s someone who had a child at 14 and is still going after her dreams. If I did it, literally anybody can and should do it,” says Yasmine

College Checklist

Let’s Talk About Sex

Finding Love...

Continued from page 13

Continued from page 29

Continued from page 32

connect with current students whether through e-mail, Facebook, or telephone. They are the best insight into what your life will be like as a student. •

Get your college essay in shape. Get feedback on your writing from a guidance counselor and a teacher.

•

Don't let your grades slide. It's easy to be distracted from school work when working on applications. Senior slump can be disastrous for your admissions chances.

Check out this timeline too: www.collegeapps.about.com/od/ admissionstimeline/tp/12th-gradetimeline.htm. Stay tuned for the December/ January issues: “All about the Money: Making college affordable and understanding the forms”

interests at heart. Take some time to ask yourself some questions. Why do you want to have sex? Does having sex now interfere with your personal and/or religious values? Does your partner trust and respect you? Do you trust and respect them? Are you ready to deal with the things that sex brings? These questions can help you figure out your next move, or if you need to stay on the sidelines. All of the information in this article came from the Planned Parenthood website (www.plannedparenthood.org). You can use this site to find more detailed information. Also, please talk to a parent, school nurse, health care professional or trusted adult if you have any questions about sex. *All statistics and data were taken from the

try to buy younger girls in exchange for other things. •

•

He is secretive about the other ladies in his life. Some guys use younger ladies to make their girlfriends their own age jealous. Be cautious of a guy who doesn’t want to share information about his past relationships. His stories are always changing. If this guys stories don’t flow or contradict, then they probably aren’t true

In summary, older guys are at different points in their lives. Age is more than a number and often attributes to experience. These are not experiences for teen girls. Enjoy your age and lack of responsibility now. Date a guy with bills and responsibility when you can share stories about the same things.

Planned Parenthood website: www.plannedparenthood.org (2009)

www.GoddessGirlMag.com

Advertise your business in the next issue! For our Media Kit, contact Anita Wideman Advertising Manager anita@goddessgirlmag.com