Grace & Peace Magazine - Spring 2019 issue

Page 1

A D I A LO G I CA L R E S O U RC E FO R N A Z A R E N E C L E R GY

ISSUE 20 | SPRING 2019

Ministry in a Connected Culture

U S A / CA N A D A R E G I O N , C H U R C H O F T H E N A Z A R E N E

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG


Anywhere. Anytime.

THE DIFFERENCE IS ONLINE Pastoral Ministries • Bible & Theology • Counseling For Christian Ministries Christian School Education • Christian Educational Ministries Leadership & Ethics • Hispanic Pastoral Ministries • Pastoral Leadership

www.nbc.edu 719-884-5060


Mi ni s tr y i n a Co nne c te d Cu l t u re A QUARTERLY MAGAZINE OF THE USA/CANADA REGION CHURCH OF THE NAZARENE

Grace & Peace Spring 2019, Issue 20 www.graceandpeacemagazine.org Bob Broadbooks USA/Canada Regional Director Managing Editor | Charles W. Christian > CChristian@nazarene.org Associate Editor | Jeanette Gardner Littleton > GPmagazine@nazarene.org Assistant Editor | Rebecca Rodeheaver > GPmagazine@nazarene.org Layout & Design | Caines Design - JR Caines ADVERTISING OR OTHER INQUIRIES PLEASE CONTACT: CChristian@nazarene.org or call (913) 577-2837

This publication is a dialogical resource for pastors and ministry practitioners affiliated with the Church of the Nazarene. Its purpose is to increase ministry effectiveness, stimulate theological and missional reflection, and promote healthy dialogue among its print and online readership. No portion of this magazine may be reproduced without written permission from the managing editor. Among other things, Grace & Peace Magazine commits to the following priorities for its readership: leadership development, theological identity, new church development, missional outreach, and church renewal. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture quotations are from the NIV: From The Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® (NIV), copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide. Our Perspective: We seek to continue the tradition of the early Church of the Nazarene that sought to integrate the diverse theological and methodological voices in the church. We seek to be a movement of people who care about the same things, but not in the same way. Yet, always maintaining that difference is not the savior—Christ is. We seek to be informed by missiology and cultural anthropology, which gives permission to innovate and seek renewal. We want to be open to listen, value, and pay attention to a variety of structures, missions, and programs, while affirming our commitment to the Wesleyan theological tradition. We seek methodological innovation in response to a changing culture as we work to make Christlike disciples in the nations. Questions? Email the editor at GPeditor@nazarene.org. Endorsed by: Wesleyan Theological Society, Wesleyan Holiness Consortium USA/Canada Regional Office Church of the Nazarene 17001 Prairie Star Parkway Lenexa, KS 66220

FOLLOW GRACE AND PEACE: TWITTER: twitter.com/GPMag_COTN FACEBOOK: facebook.com/graceandpeacemagazine


C O N T E N T S

G & P I S S U E 2 0

SPRING 2019

I N VO C AT I O N : How T h ey Love O n e A n oth e r by Ch a r le s W. Ch r i sti a n

3

USA National Board Report by Bob Broadbooks

5

Natural-Born Christian Cyborgs by Brad D. Strawn

10

I N T E R V I E W: Building Eternal Relationships: The Well Church

14

Relational Compound Interest by Scott Sherwood

18

Building Relationships Across Lines of Culture and Economics by Samuel Vassel

20

Adopted Into the Kingdom by Brian L. Powell

22

I N T E R V I E W: The Benefits of NazSafe — Five Questions: An interview with Leslie Hart

26

Jesus and Women by Diane Leclerc

28

Attention, Men: Christianity is Best Lived in Community by Kerry W. Willis

30

Joy in the Journey by Dana Preusch

32

The Lost Art of Pastoral Prayers by Ann L. Coker

34

Breaking Into A Church by Katherine Crawford

36

T H E PA S TO R ’ S S P O U S E : Living Beside the Call by Jill Barber

38

S E M I N A RY S P OT L I G H T: Mentoring for Ministry by Mark Walker

40

F R O M T H E A U T H O R : Five Questions: Les Parrott

42

B O O K R E V I E W: Love Like That Rev i ewed by Da ni e lle A. Jo ne s

44

B O O K R E V I E W: The Magnificent Journey Revi ewe d by S teve Jo h nso n

46

B E N E D I CT I O N : If Jesus Were Pastor by B o b Bro a d b o o ks

48

N E W S : 4

2 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019


FROM THE EDITOR

HOW THEY LOVE ONE ANOTHER

“S

ee how they love one another.” The African theologian and church father Tertullian (160-220 A.D.) wrote these words to illustrate how the “pagans” began to describe Christians in his region as the movement began to spread. He wrote that even those who had no knowledge of Christ observed that these early Christfollowers were willing to share with one another when there was need and that they were even willing to die for one another if necessary. This self-giving love bore witness to the kind of transformation Jesus provides to all who follow Him. The transformation that Christ-centered love brings about strengthens our relationships and allows the Holy Spirit to draw lost people to Christ as they see His love at work in those who follow Him. There have been Christians who possess great intelligence, great wealth, and great physical skill throughout the history of the Church. Many of these men and women have used the platforms that their skills and acclaim provided to point others to Christ. However, since the beginning of the movement, the greatest and most consistent Christian witness to the risen Lord has been born through our relationships—the way our relationships with one another, and even with those who oppose us, point to the tenacious, self-sacrificing, and life-changing love of God. This issue of Grace & Peace seeks to expand the conversation regarding healthy relationships. As ministers, we tend to live in “glass houses” when it comes to how we treat others, including our spouses, children, and church members in our care. Indeed, all Christians who proclaim their faith are measured not just by their knowledge of the basics of Christianity, but by how their proclamation is lived out in the context of our relationships.

Our team reached out to district leaders, counselors, pastors, and even to those who are not in vocational ministry to address areas of focus and of necessary sensitivity as we seek to build healthy, loving, Christ-centered relationships that not only give us joy but also bear witness to the goodness of God in our world. Jesus reminds all of those who seek to follow Him that a key identifier of one of His disciples is the way we express our love in relationship to others: “By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another” (John 13:35). It is often true that before people hear what we believe, they see it. Most of the time, their initial glimpse of what we believe is evident in how we relate to those around us—whether it be our closest relatives or the wait staff who serves us in a local café. May our relationships so obviously reflect the kindness and sacrificial love of God that the testimony about us even from the most hardened of hearts will be: “Look at how they love one another!”

CHARLES W. CHRISTIAN

Managing Editor

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 3


BGS INTRODUCE NEW INITIATIVE: GLOBAL MISSIONS SPECIAL ISSUE

NAZARENE MISSIONS: A Movement of God Through the People of God

S T O R I E S O F T R A N S F O R M AT I O N

What Can God Do? Face-to-Face Discipleship $4.95 March/ April 2019 holinesstoday.org CHURCH OF THE NAZARENE

Living on Mission

The Board of General Superintendents launched a new theme initiative for 2019. This year’s theme is Global Missions, and a box will be sent to every local church with training materials, information, and inspirational stories about the work of Nazarene Global Missions. Please share these items with your congregation. According to the BGS, the plan is to have a key theme or area of focus each year in the coming years in order to provide education, awareness, and inspiration regarding key aspects of the church’s mission. Holiness Today, the denomination’s official global publication, will feature an annual issue highlighting the BGS themes every March/April. A complimentary copy of Holiness Today (March/April 2019) will be included in the packet sent to local churches.

M19 HIGHLIGHTS: “THE GOSPEL UNLEASHED” Around 3,000 leaders from across the USA/Canada Region attended the M19 Conference in Kansas City in February. The mid-quadrennial conference featured a diverse array of plenary speakers and over 120 workshops focusing on evangelism, discipleship, and other topics related to effective ministry in our ever-changing culture. Dynamic worship experiences included Communion together at the end of the first night’s session and a baptism service of the one of the newest church plants on the region, TLC Nazarene Church in Kansas City. To view the messages of the plenary speakers and stories of transformation displayed throughout the conference, feel free to visit: usacanadaregion.org/m19. When they are processed, audio files of workshops will also be available at this web address.

REGIONAL DIRECTOR’S REPORT USA/Canada Regional Director Dr. Bob Broadbooks gave his annual report to the General Board in February. The report highlighted the planting of new churches all across the region. Dr. Broadbooks shared: “This is the seventh year in a row that we have started over 100 new churches. We now have 5,113 active churches, which is an increase of 105 churches during this decade.” The report shared concerns about decrease and flat-lining of numbers of attenders throughout the USA/ Canada, a trend that reflects overall trends across denominational lines throughout the region. However, encouraging developments such as the growth of multi-ethnic congregations and the renewed emphasis upon prayer, evangelism, personal discipleship, and church planting were cited as reasons for Spirit-led optimism about the future of churches throughout the region. Also this year, almost 48,000 people came to faith in Christ in the USA/Canada region. Full report available on page 5.

4 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019


U S A N AT I O N A L B OA R D R E P O R T B y D r . B ob B roadboo k s - D ire c tor , U S A / C anada R e g ion C h ur c h

—FEBRUARY, 2019 A perusal of news stories will quickly tell us that our clergy and laity live in challenging days. Since we are called to minister in this time frame, we need to be aware of the very real angst that Americans are experiencing. In the U.S. last year, there was a decline in average life expectancy for the first time in many decades. There was an increase in suicide and drug overdose. The 2.8 million deaths reported were almost 70,000 more than the previous year. Dr. William Dietz, a disease prevention expert at George Washington University, said, “I really do believe that people are increasingly hopeless, and that leads to drug use and potentially suicide.” The suicide rate is the highest it has been in 50 years. Even popular song lyrics reflect this hopelessness. USA Today reports that a study of popular music lyrics over the last 60 years shows that song lyrics have gotten angrier and sadder. We often hear that because of American society’s move toward secularization, the Church is floundering. However, research published in late 2017 by Landon Schnabel and Sean Bock of Harvard University and Indiana University Bloomington suggests that the demise of the church in the U.S. is exaggerated. They write, “Recent research argues that the United States is secularizing, that this religious change is consistent with the secularization thesis, and that American religion is not exceptional. But we show that rather than religion fading into irrelevance as the secularization thesis would suggest, intense religion—strong affiliation, very frequent practice, literalism, and evangelicalism—is persistent and, in fact, only moderate religion is on the decline in the United States. We also show that in comparable countries, intense religion is on the decline or already at very low levels. Therefore, the intensity of American religion is actually becoming more exceptional over time. We conclude that intense religion in the United States is persistent and exceptional in ways that do not fit the secularization thesis.”

of the

N a z arene

Glenn T. Stanton comments on Schnabel and Bock’s research: “Mainline churches are tanking as if they have super-sized millstones around their necks. Yes, these churches are hemorrhaging members in startling numbers, but many of those folks are not leaving Christianity. They are simply going elsewhere. Because of this shifting, other very different kinds of churches are holding strong in crowds and have been for as long as such data has been collected.” These are challenging days, but Nazarenes are people of great hope. Our positive message of holiness is the antidote to the sense of hopelessness around us. People continue to seek out a church that is alive and that is meeting needs. In our region we have our challenges, but the good news is overwhelming. God has helped us this year. In the past year, God has helped us add 10 new district superintendents to our region. We are grateful for this great group of dynamic leaders: Virgil & Judith Askren, South Arkansas District; Rose Brower-Young & Brad Young, Canada West District; Mark & Ruth Collins, Canada Atlantic District; Sam & Candy Flores, South Carolina District; Dwight & Karan Gunter, MidSouth District; Bret & Beth Layton, West Virginia South District; Stephen & Patricia Ottley, Canada Central District; Kyle & Julie Poole, Georgia District; Sam & Angela Vassel, Metro New York District; and Kerry & Kim Willis, Philadelphia District. We also anticipate seven new superintendents this coming year. In the statistics from this past year, you will find reason for both praise and concern. While we did not realize a net increase in worship attendance and membership, we rejoice that in this last church year 46,835 people found Christ in our 5,113 churches. We received 22,880 new Nazarenes into membership. Dale Jones, of Nazarene Research, tells me that 73.4 percent of our churches receive at least one new Nazarene every two years. Our pastors continue to be evangelistic disciple-makers!

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 5


This year 135 new churches were planted, which means that for the seventh year in a row we have started over 100 churches. The last time this level of sustained church planting happened in our region was in the 1950s. This is a very encouraging number and a testament to the hard work and passion of our leaders in the planting of new churches. Our district superintendents continue to give our local churches permission to be creative in starting new works. We believe that this new church number is the leading indicator of future growth, and coupled with renewal in existing churches, we will see net future gains in membership and worship. We now have 5,113 active churches, which is an increase of 105 during this decade. This increase of 105 churches is a real accomplishment for the Nazarenes in our region. During the last 50 years, there was only one other decade (1979–88) when we experienced a net gain in total number of active churches. As you know, we have been engaged in aggressive church planting. This is absolutely necessary, and we must see this as a priority on each of our 78 districts. About 80 percent of organized Nazarene churches in the region were planted before 1987. This means that the majority of our churches are over 30 years old. I am told that churches that are more than 20 years old decline by an average of 1–2 percent per year. We rejoice in the 135 new churches started this year, but we must see that number increase to help us experience new growth. God is helping us. In addition to church planting, we continue to emphasize the vibrant renewal of our existing churches. One of our church renewal efforts is the RAND Project, led by Dr. Stan Reeder. Fifty-five of our seventy-eight districts are now participating. Ninety-eight facilitators have been trained around four hundred churches and two thousand laypeople are now involved. We believe that this effort will bless our existing churches and increase our effectiveness. Our people voluntarily placed $737 million in our offering plates. They also gave more than $127 million to our global mission effort, our retired ministers, our universities, and our district work. This is an increase in giving over last year. Nazarenes are generous folks!

6 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

 We celebrate the many victories of changed lives in our region this year. Some of these victories are measured in numbers on reports, but many of them are known only to the Lord. Our faithful pastors and laypeople have often labored without being aware of the full impact of their ministries. The numbers have not always reflected the effort and sacrifice of our ministries. While the numbers in this letter reflect souls and changed lives, we all know that God has done much more than can be documented in graphs and charts. We include the charts that follow because many leaders appreciate benchmarks, but we quickly add that they only tell the partial story (Canada is included here so that you can see the whole picture of our region). Thanks to these districts for leading the way and for helping us to see that progress is possible. We rejoice with each victory, whether highlighted or hidden! Yes, we have reason to rejoice, but there is still much work to be done. Many in our region have not yet heard our message. Rather than rising to new life in Jesus, they continue to sink in anger, sadness, and hopelessness. They often seek to escape their pain by drastic means. The greatest need of the church in our region is a renewal of holy boldness to speak up and to live compassionately. In this increasingly secularized and polarized society, we Nazarenes must be the people full of praise and joy. In the midst of sorrow and pain, people will be drawn to the Christ of the Nazarenes as we continue to rejoice and give praise to God. We must be confident to proclaim that our God will deliver and heal!

BOB BROADBOOKS

USA/Canada Regional Director


MEMBERSHIP PERCENTAGE CHANGE DISTRICT

CURRENT DS

% CHANGE

1

Canada Quebec

Dr. D. Ian Fitzpatrick

11.8%

2

Kentucky

Dr. Brian L. Powell

4.4%

3

Sacramento

Rev. Steven R. Scott

2.7%

4

Rocky Mountain

Rev. Bill T. Carr

2.3%

5

Los Angeles

Rev. Gregory A. Garman

2.1%

6

South Arkansas

Dr. Virgil R. Askren III

1.9%

7

Maine

Dr. Stephen W. Dillman

1.6%

8

Hawaii Pacific

Dr. Rick D. Power

1.6%

9

Virginia

Dr. J. Phillip Fuller

1.5%

10

Alabama South

Dr. Mark D. Berry

1.5%

DISTRICT

CURRENT DS

# CHANGE

1

Kentucky

Dr. Brian L. Powell

324

2

Sacramento

Rev. Steven R. Scott

302

3

Los Angeles

Rev. Gregory A. Garman

259

4

Virginia

Dr. J. Phillip Fuller

204

5

Canada Quebec

Dr. D. Ian Fitzpatrick

166

6

South Carolina

Rev. Sam A. Flores

142

7

Chicago Central

Dr. Larry D. McKain

136

8

Central California

Rev. Rob D. Songer

123

9

South Arkansas

Dr. Virgil R. Askren III

120

10

Southern California

Dr. Thomas W. Taylor Jr.

100

DISTRICT

CURRENT DS

% CHANGE

1

Prairie Lakes

Rev. Steven P. Hoffman

15.9%

2

Canada Quebec

Dr. D. Ian Fitzpatrick

10.7%

3

Kentucky

Dr. Brian L. Powell

6.9%

4

Southwest Native American

Dr. John R. Nells

5.8%

5

Nebraska

Rev. Daniel W. Cole

3.4%

6

Alaska

Rev. Paul R. Hartley

2.7%

7

Louisiana

Rev. Charles A. Fountain Jr.

1.7%

8

Joplin

Rev. Phillip A. Rhoades

1.6%

9

Chicago Central

Dr. Larry D. McKain

1.2%

10

Northwestern Illinois

Dr. Scott J. Sherwood

1.1%

MEMBERSHIP NUMERICAL GAIN

WORSHIP PERCENTAGE CHANGE

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 7


WORSHIP NUMBERICAL GAIN DISTRICT

CURRENT DS

# CHANGE

1

Prairie Lakes

Rev. Steven P. Hoffman

1,008

2

Kentucky

Dr. Brian L. Powell

338

3

Southern Florida

Dr. Brian E. Wilson

122

4

Canada Quebec

Dr. D. Ian Fitzpatrick

121

5

Joplin

Rev. Phillip A. Rhoades

121

6

Chicago Central

Dr. Larry D. McKain

82

7

Los Angeles

Rev. Gregory A. Garman

70

8

Nebraska

Rev. Daniel W. Cole

66

9

Northwestern Illinois

Dr. Scott J. Sherwood

66

10

Southwest Native American

Dr. John R. Nells

49

DISTRICT

CURRENT DS

# CHANGE

1

Chicago Central

Dr. Larry D. McKain

2

1

East Tennessee

Dr. Ronald K. McCormack

2

1

MidSouth

Dr. Dwight M. Gunter II

2

1

New England

Rev. Kenneth Stanford

2

1

Washington Pacific

Rev. Jerry R. Kester

2

1

West Texas

Dr. David E. Downs

2

2

15 Districts had 1 newly organized church each

NEWLY ORGANIZED CHURCHES

1

NEWLY REPORTING CHURCHS DISTRICT

CURRENT DS

# OF CHURCHES

1

Chicago Central

Dr. Larry D. McKain

18

2

Kentucky

Dr. Brian L. Powell

15

3

South Texas

Dr. Jeffrey T. Johnson

8

4

Northeastern Indiana

Dr. David G. Roland

7

4

Northwestern Illinois

Dr. Scott J. Sherwood

7

6

South Central Ohio

Rev. Trevor H. Johnston

6

6

Southern California

Dr. Thomas W. Taylor Jr.

6

8

West Texas

Dr. David E. Downs

5

9

Florida

Dr. Larry D. Dennis

4

9

Kansas

Rev. James C. Bond

4

9

Metro New York

Dr. Samuel C. Vassel

4

7 districts had 3 newly reporting churches each

3

5 districts had 2 newly reporting churches each

2

20 districts had 1 newly reporting church each

1

8 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019


CONVERSIONS {PERCENTAGE CHANGE DISTRICT

CURRENT DS

% CHANGE

1

South Carolina

Rev. Sam A. Flores

79.3%

2

Prairie Lakes

Rev. Steven P. Hoffman

74.7%

3

Chicago Central

Dr. Larry D. McKain

61.8%

4

Pittsburgh

Rev. Daniel R. Eddings

60.6%

5

West Virginia South

Rev. Bret M. Layton

57.6%

6

Canada Quebec

Dr. D. Ian Fitzpatrick

38.5%

7

Southern California

Dr. Thomas W. Taylor Jr.

32.6%

8

Mid-Atlantic

Dr. David W. Bowser

32.2%

9

West Virginia North

Rev. J. Kevin Dennis

23.9%

10

Georgia

Rev. W. Kyle Poole

21.4%

DISTRICT

CURRENT DS

% CHANGE

1

Rocky Mountain

Rev. Bill T. Carr

147.5%

2

Canada Quebec

Dr. D. Ian Fitzpatrick

71.4%

3

Canada Pacific

Rev. Earl R. Wood

67.4%

4

Southern California

Dr. Thomas W. Taylor Jr.

64.1%

5

South Arkansas

Dr. Virgil R. Askren III

62.1%

6

Mid-Atlantic

Dr. David W. Bowser

42.7%

7

Illinois

Dr. James M. Kraemer

36.3%

8

Pittsburgh

Rev. Daniel R. Eddings

36.0%

9

West Virginia North

Rev. J. Kevin Dennis

35.5%

10

Kansas

Rev. James C. Bond

30.0%

NEW NARARENES PERCENTAGE CHANGE

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 9


NATU R AL- B OR N CHRI STIAN CY BORG S ://

B rad D . S tra w n , P h . D .

T

he performance artist, Stelarc, created a motorized “third arm.” Stelarc’s “third arm” was a robotic arm that he attached to his right shoulder and was operated through a series of electric wires that connected to his abdomen and thigh. When he wanted to move the “third arm,” he would contract his abdomen and thigh in particular ways allowing him to move it around. This was a pretty neat trick and the kind of thing one might expect from a performance artist, but what no one anticipated was that after many months of using the arm, Stelarc no longer had to “think” about moving the “third arm.” He didn’t have to consciously think about contracting his thigh and abdomen muscles

10 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

as he had in the beginning. Just like you don’t have to “think” about moving your physical arms, Stelarc reached the point that he could just move his “third arm” like he moved his physical arms; it felt automatic and natural. His body had incorporated the “third arm” as if it were an actual part of his body. Stelarc is a modern-day cyborg. We imagine cyborgs as those fictional or hypothetical people whose abilities are extended beyond their normal human limitations by mechanical elements built into their bodies. Think “Terminator” or “Robocop” and you will know what I mean. But cognitive science is now full of examples of cyborg-like realities. This has spawned the study in philosophy of what is called cognitive extension. It appears that humans are naturally wired to incorporate elements of our world (think tools), human artifacts (think computers), and relationships (think close friends) in ways that actually extend our abilities beyond our own embodied limitations.


This is why philosopher of mind Andy Clark calls humans “natural-born cyborgs.” W h at D o e s E x t e n s i o n R e a l ly M e a n ?

Maybe it is best to begin by describing some of the ways that humans already act like cyborgs. Think of individuals with pace makers to help control their hearts or implanted defibrillators in case of heart attack. These devices enhance the person’s capacity beyond their normal limitations. Cochlear implants electronically stimulate the auditory nerve allowing many profoundly deaf people to hear. A Type-1 diabetic can wear a continuous glucose monitor (CGM) attached to her body that measures blood glucose in real time, and an insulin pump that receives Bluetooth information from the CGM and delivers the right amount of insulin to the body without her having to think about it. These are just a few of many examples of technology connected to the body in ways that enhance limitations of the body and do so in ways that we don’t even have to think about. But being a natural-born cyborg is more than technological devices attached to our bodies. Humans are designed to incorporate, or what cognitive extension researchers call “soft-couple,” these kinds of devices in a variety of ways. Our thinking is not limited

to our brains or bodies. Consider someone coming up to you and asking, “Do you know what time it is?” You immediately answer “yes,” but in reality, you in your own physical limitations don’t really know what time it is. You only “know” because you are wearing a watch or carrying a cell phone—both of which are human artifacts that you soft-couple with to extend your knowledge. Or what about enhancing and extending your memory? If you are like me, I can’t tell you what I’m doing tomorrow without the electronic calendar on my cell phone and computer. Word processing and managing large amounts of data on spread sheets requires electronic help, too. Do you think you could do this without your computer? In the language of cognitive extension, we soft-couple to these devices in order to enhance our abilities. That is, like cyborgs, we incorporate technology that extends our capacities beyond our normal human limitations. We incorporate things in transparent ways, and yet we become deeply dependent on them; they are part of our thinking. Andy Clark says that we are so connected to our computers that for some of us, if our computer crashed, it would be like having a small stroke! Just in case you think that being a natural-born cyborg is only related to really high-tech gadgets like computers and cell phones consider this: If I ask you to add 24 and 72 in your head you probably have little problem, but if I ask you to multiple 375 and 432 this becomes daunting. But what if I give you a pencil and a piece of paper? Suddenly your performance is extended by the softcoupling to something as simple as paper and pencil. Brain scan studies were conducted looking at skilled carpenters as well as weekend novices using hammers. It turns out that for skilled carpenters, the brain maps the end of the hammer as part of the hand. This probably explains why skilled carpenters rarely hit their own fingers the way the rest of us often do. This mapping of a tool into the brain as part of the body has also been seen in individuals who wear prosthetic limbs.

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 11


Social Extension

and the

Church

So far, we have discussed the ways in which we can extend our capacities beyond our normal human limitations by soft-coupling with technologies inserted into the body (pace maker), outside the body (cell phones), and even everyday things we rarely think about (hammers and watches). But there is one other form of extension that is particularly relevant for Christians: social extension. It turns out that we also enhance our human capacities by soft-coupling with other humans. We can extend our problem-solving abilities by being a part of a brainstorming session with others. We extend our knowledge of morality and behavioral norms by being part of a family. We can even enhance our natural healing capacities by processes of interpersonal extension such as psychotherapy. Once again, our capacities are enhanced, but this time by soft-coupling with others. Social extension is particularly important for Christian believers. In our forthcoming book, Supersizing the Christian Life: How Religious Experience Extends Beyond the Person, Warren Brown and I argue that genuine Christian community offers the possibility of extending and enhancing one’s Christian life. Whereas much of Western Christianity today can be focused on inward, individualistic, and private pursuits of spirituality, we consider such pursuits to be limited, because they are aimed at the individual. But what if we could truly extend our Christianity into the life and artifacts of the church? We think this would supersize our Christian lives! When we truly soft-couple with others in the body (including soft-coupling to artifacts like prayer books, hymnals, theology books, written doctrines of the church, and, most importantly, the social relationships we develop), we enhance the limitations of our spiritual lives; we literally extend ourselves into the worshiping community. Of course

12 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

God is at work through the Holy Spirit to bring growth, but we believe this kind of extension is the unity that Paul exhorts in 1 Corinthians 12. Christians believe better together, worship better together, sing better together, pray and read liturgies better together, and serve better together. When we do this, we literally enhance our Christian capacities and formation! Even though we have had the church for centuries, often it doesn’t function as a form of extension. In order for true extension to occur, the objects we soft-couple with must be readily available. There must be regular ongoing engagement, and they must provide interactive feedback in important ways. In most of our churches where “regular attenders” come once or fewer times per month, it is hard to imagine that any true soft-coupling is taking place. We need to think carefully about how our religious practices are either a form of soft-coupling leading to extension, or a kind of information acquisition that doesn’t lead parishioners beyond an individualist Christian faith. To be the true body of Christ requires serious time together, regular repetition of behaviors, and the accountability of genuine interaction. When genuine soft-coupling occurs, we are able to live into our roles as natural-born Christian cyborgs.

BRAD D. STRAWN is a psychologist and theologian who serves as the Evelyn and Frank Freed Professor of the Integration of Psychology and Theology at Fuller Theological Seminary.

SUGGESTED READINGS: Andy Clark, Natural-Born Cyborgs: Minds, Technologies, and the Future of Human Intelligence (Oxford University Press) Brad D. Strawn and Warren S. Brown, Supersizing the Christian Life: How Religious Experience Extends Beyond the Person (forthcoming, IVP) Warren S. Brown and Brad D. Strawn, The Physical Nature of Christian Life: Neuroscience, Psychology, & the Church (Cambridge University Press)


Empowering ministers to practice and teach biblical financial stewardship.

Academy

Journey

FREE ONLINE RESOURCES

ONE YEAR PROCESS

for excellent biblical financial management and stewardship including information on debt management, retirement readiness, and local church finances.

of education, training and accountability for qualifying U.S. pastors and full-time associates.

MATCHING GRANTS OF UP TO $5,000 available for those who complete the Journey.

Quest FREE PERSONAL FINANCES COURSE Six online training sessions for ministers and spouses to improve financial communication and increase financial health.

MATCHING GRANTS OF UP TO $1,000 available to qualifying U.S. pastors and full-time associates who complete the course.

www.COMPASSinitiative.org

“I wish I would have known these things 25 years ago. I would be in a different place today.” L.B. “We have transferred more money into our savings account this second quarter than we have ever done in our 10 years of marriage.” R.W.


INTERVIEW BUILDING ETERNAL REL ATIONSHIPS: The Well Church I N T E R V I E W E R : C H A R L E S W. C H R I S T I A N Recently, Grace & Peace visited The Well Church, a Nazarene congregation in Springfield, Missouri, planted in 2016. In less than three years, this congregation is reaching 500–700 people each week in worship, life groups, and recovery ministries. The Well’s co-pastors are Selena Freeman and Dylan Robinson. Selena and her husband, John, helped lead Dylan to Christ almost a decade ago when he was still in his teens. Dylan had already established a reputation in the community as a troubled teen, participating in fights, selling drugs, and involved in other destructive behaviors. After Dylan left his abusive home life, Selena and John, along with their two young children, took Dylan in to live with them. Their investment in his life resulted in Dylan coming to Christ and becoming a kind of godson to the Freemans. Both Dylan and Selena became youth pastors at different congregations, but after attending a church planting training held on their district, they both felt led to plant a new congregation in downtown Springfield. They now co-pastor the congregation and have a diverse staff that is heavily invested in the community. Their downtown Springfield location—a former comedy club—hosts a coffee shop, a recovery ministry, and several worship services each weekend. In March, the congregation opened a north campus of The Well in Springfield complete with space for worship, youth and children’s ministry, and additional ministries to the community. Charles Christian, managing editor of Grace & Peace (GP) attended a staff meeting and interviewed the co-pastors of The Well (Dylan Robinson, DR; and Selena Freeman, SF) for this issue. The edited interview appears below.

G P : W H AT A R E S O M E O F T H E C H A L L E N G E S YO U FAC E D A S YO U A P P R OAC H E D YO U R F I R S T Y E A R O F THIS CHURCH PL ANT? S F: We had to start with defining our roles. We both have complementary strengths and weaknesses, but we also have strengths that intersect. We recognized that we needed to be specific in certain areas, so that we could have a solution for possible conflicts that may arise. Dylan would oversee the preaching area, and I would oversee the administration and discipleship aspects. We would then work to develop leaders, including future staff, who could assist in these and others areas of the congregation. D R: For me, the challenge in transitioning to being a co-pastor with Selena is that she is my godmother. She and her husband, John, helped raise me from my middle teen years. I am now in my mid-20s, and I wanted to grow

14 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

in these new areas of responsibility while also having the humility to recognize my need for growth and help. We have both found that like all co-pastors, regardless of their backgrounds, taking seriously the biblical guidelines to “submit to one another out of reverence for Christ” is the key. S F: We both preach consistently, and we are both involved in aspects of discipleship and administration. However, it helps our staff and board to know where to go when those areas need a final word. As Dylan said, we both have to consistently learn humility and cooperation in order for this to work. G P: H OW D O E S THE RE L ATI O N S HIP YO U H AV E A S CO - PA S TO R S C A RRY OV E R IN RE G A RD TO WO RKIN G WITH YO U R S TA FF A ND CH U RCH B OA RD? S F: We are very much staff led and board supported in our model. Everyone has a voice,


and we seek to honor the talents and gifts of those whom God brings to us. That means we have to learn to not be threatened by those whose gifts are different than ours. D R: That’s right. Giving trust and freedom within the context of our vision is important. S F: Our four “Ps,” which describe our core values, are “Prayer, People, Passion, and Process.” So, we are rooted in prayer, we intentionally seek to reach out to and build relationships with people, we want to emphasize passionate involvement in the kingdom of God, and we really do believe in the importance of following a process—an agreed-upon process that unifies us together. G P : YO U A R E C O - PA S T O R S W H O A R E M ARRIED TO SPOUSES WHO ARE

N O T C L E R G Y. YO U H AV E A U N I Q U E R E L AT I O N S H I P I N T H AT S E L E N A , YO U A N D YO U R H U S B A N D H E L P E D R A I S E DY L A N . H O W E V E R , YO U A R E S T I L L A M A L E - F E M A L E C O - PA S T O R T E A M . H O W D O YO U N AV I G AT E T H I S R E L AT I O N S H I P W H E N I T C O M E S T O YO U R W O R K ? D R: In one sense, Selena and John are family. But, when we are at work, she is Pastor Selena, a colleague. I am actually married to her husband’s niece, so there is an additional family connection there, too. Many who don’t know us either assume that we are married to one another or that I (because I am male) am the “lead pastor.” So, it starts with our language—how we talk to and about one another in the context of our ministry calling. This includes ways in

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 15


Everyone

has a voice,

a n d w e s ee k t o h o n o r t h e talents and gifts of those whom

That

God

brings to us.

means we have to

learn to not be threatened by those whose gifts are different than ours.

D R: We don’t always balance things perfectly, but we are transparent about areas of growth, and we believe God uses this to witness to the church.

which we are intentional about lifting up our spouses publicly and privately, reminding our congregation and our spouses that we are committed to honoring them in every way. S F: If you notice our website, our pastoral photos are with our spouses. We work closely together as co-pastors, but we use wisdom in regard to how we travel together, especially if it involves a long distance. We communicate clearly with the board as a team in ways that are respectful of our spouses and of other church members, recognizing that we want to model healthy male-female relationships professionally and in our personal lives. In our communication with our spouses about our work, I have learned that I tend to give too much information to my husband at times in ways that may feel to him like I am “dumping” all the stresses of my day. Dylan, on the other hand, went through a stage when his spouse did not feel like he was opening up enough about his work, since he thought she would not want to hear all the details. So, we are learning about healthy ways to work together professionally while we are also learning to grow in our relationship with our spouses and with others in the congregation. This is the relational balance that all of ministry requires.

16 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

G P : T H E W E L L H A S G R O W N Q U I C K LY AND HAS A L ARGE NUMBER OF YO U N G A D U LT S . H O W D O YO U K E E P T H E W E L L F R O M S I M P LY B E I N G A T R E N DY C H U R C H O R A “ F L A S H I N T H E PA N ” ? D P: As Selena said, we believe in a process of discipleship that is Wesleyan. We preach and teach about holiness in ways that represent what the Church of the Nazarene is about. We have strong small groups that are an integral part of our discipleship, and we have a strong emphasis upon mentoring. I am a product of mentoring by Selena and John, and we have many stories like that in our congregation. S F: We do have some “trendy” things that are part of our identity—a coffee shop ministry, strong worship, many young adults, etc. However, our goal has never been to be trendy or simply attractional in our approach. The “process” part of our vision involves making connections with people, helping them encounter Jesus Christ, teaching them what it means to be holy, mentoring people through small groups and through one-on-one discipleship, and then sending people to be evangelists and disciple-makers in the world. We are even working with the


We

do have some

“ trendy ”

things that are part of our identit y — a coffee shop

ministry , strong worship , many young adults , etc .

H owever ,

our goal has never

been to be trendy or simply

attractional in our approach .

seminary and with our regional Nazarene university to become a “mentoring church.” We want students to explore their calling by connecting with and being involved in what God is doing at The Well. We also emphasize our connection with the global Church of the Nazarene through participation in the World Evangelism Fund and other ways of connecting. D P: In addition to our new north campus (The Well North), we are working toward becoming a church that plants other churches. G P : TA L K A B O U T T H E A D D I T I O N O F YO U R N O R T H C A M P U S A N D A L S O W H AT YO U H O P E H A P P E N S I N T H E N E X T F I V E Y E A R S AT T H E W E L L .

D P: Selena and I will be part of the preaching rotation, and we have decided that we will preach two weeks at a time at both campuses in order to maintain the unity of our mission and our congregation. Although we are not really trying to develop a formula for expanding and reproducing churches, we do hope that the mentoring, worship, theological emphases, and the passion to plant churches and make disciples becomes something that other churches and church leaders can benefit from. SF: Our name, “The Well,” has biblical connections, of course. The image of Jesus speaking to the woman at the well, who felt disconnected and cast out, is a key metaphor for us. Also, the overall idea that a well is a place where healthy, nourishing water is found is also important for us. So, we want to be part of digging more wells, so to speak— healthy wells from which the living water of Jesus Christ flows.

S F: Our current downtown location has many advantages, including the coffee shop and the centrality of its location. However, there are high costs, as well as parking and space issues. So, we were able to purchase a large church building at the north end of town that will allow our staff to have office space for the first time. More importantly, we will have room to more effectively reach all age groups and to expand our service to the community.

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 17


Relational Compound Interest A Key to Minis try L o nge v ity

Y

ou have heard the stories of people who saved and invested a few dollars a week over 30-plus years and can now do whatever they want in life because of the compound interest. Frankly, these stories bother me at times, even though I don’t begrudge people for reaping what they sow. I just realize that at almost 50, I have missed the boat. Week after week, they saved and invested, made gains, and re-invested the gains, while seldom (if ever) making withdrawals. As I watch pastors who have achieved longevity in ministry, I see a parallel principle at work in how they sow and reap relationally. These stories encourage me, but they also spark desperation in me to make sure no pastor under my care misses this boat. L o n g -T e rm I n v e s t m e n t

Rev. Lloyd Brock is one such pastor. Thirty-three years ago, the church entrusted a young Rev. Brock with forty-five souls in Shelby, North Carolina. Week after week he invested in these lives, saw gains, equipped them to invest in others, and seldom, if ever, made relational withdrawals. People grew. The church grew. He is now 13 years into his fourth pastorate in Pekin, Ill. The church has grown from 400 to 900, completed a major building project, and planted 2 churches. At this point, Lloyd and his church are able to take new ground in multiple directions in rapid succession. This would be a lofty lifetime aspiration for me. We should not be discouraged when others achieve that to which we have only aspired. It proves what is possible! Regardless of the age and experience of a pastor, the souls under our care matter enough to merit our absolute best investment. What we can learn from Pastor Brock’s journey can help all of us thrive over the long haul. What follows are the recurring themes I gleaned from conversations with Pastor Brock, along with my own observations of his ministry.

18 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

S c ott S h er w ood E sta b l i sh

t h e fo u ndat i o n , a n d t h e n b u il d o n it

There are no shortcuts that will enable a person to do anything consistently if his or her heart is not sold out to it. Seeking the heart of God for people is foundational in becoming a pastor who genuinely values people. People can feel the difference between being genuinely loved and being “schmoozed.” As people become convinced that they are valued, they tend to open increasingly to the message and mission. Work

h a rd o n c o n n e c t i n g

A casual observer may conclude that Lloyd is simply a relational savant. He can greet every person in the building by name every Sunday while remembering to wish a happy birthday or anniversary to a couple of dozen of them. He introduces every new member to the congregation by name, complete with interesting biographical tidbits. How does he do it? He decided early on that it was important for people to feel known, so he made it a priority and developed personal habits and organizational systems to get it done. He spends the entire hour before worship greeting every volunteer in the building and nearly every attender. He studies the church database and records notes from his conversations with people. He uses people’s names when he sees them and quizzes himself on any names he struggles to remember. He spends ten minutes memorizing each week’s birthdays and anniversaries before each Sunday. He asks new members to introduce themselves during membership class, asks followup questions, and takes notes. This connection is merely the starting point. Pastor Brock ultimately wants to connect each person to Jesus and to the church. As these initial connections are made, he is very up front and very intentional about his desire to connect each person to Jesus. As people invite him into their lives through the church, through his community involvement, through visitation, or through funerals, Lloyd brings Jesus. After


trusting environment that allows increasingly bigger proposals to be approved and implemented with greater ease and frequency. Learn

all, they wouldn’t invite a pastor into their lives and not expect him to bring Jesus, would they? Pekin First is full of families whose first encounter with the church was Pastor Brock’s presence at the chamber of commerce, the hospital, a community event, or a funeral. Listen

One of the remarkable elements of Lloyd’s countless conversations each week is that he doesn’t do much of the talking. He is listening to people and to God. He told me once that during every conversation he has, he is praying for God to give Him the response this person most needs in that moment. He tends to take notes later on matters that linger in his mind. Listening is also a critical discipline in staff and board environments. Slow

d o w n d e c i s i o n m a k i n g i n o rd e r t o a c c e l e r at e p r o g r e s s

Lloyd intentionally slows down decisionmaking in order to ensure good decisions and maximum unity. Lloyd says that if he cannot get his leaders together on the plan, he’ll never be able to keep his whole church together during the implementation. This slowing down is not a passive reaction to opposition. It is taking time to do the hard work of listening, providing transparency about motives and potential downsides, incorporating feedback, revising proposals, and ultimately building consensus. While not everyone on the team may agree with the final decision, everyone is heard. Once the decision is made, everyone is committed to help make it a success. The increased unity that results helps speed up implementation. Over time, the accumulated effect of this approach has been a

t o b u i l d r e l at i o n s h i p s ta m i n a

Relational ministry takes energy. Lloyd believes that if pastors have the desire, they can build relationship stamina over time, just as athletes can strengthen muscles and improve endurance over time. Some would be surprised to hear that Lloyd is not an extrovert. He spends a couple hours alone every Sunday morning preparing to invest the rest of the day in people. As his capacity for connecting with people relationally has increased, so has the number of people available to lead and serve on teams. This increases the ability to do church well. Do

church well

An essential part of loving people well is giving them our very best. Lack of resources and talent may cause our ministry offerings to be simple, but our love for people should cause us to give them our very best. Lloyd and his teams think through how best to help their people experience what is being communicated on a given Sunday and how best to facilitate their response. Every component of the church experience needs to be done with excellence so that each person can experience and respond to God. And they are responding! Pekin First has reported more conversions over the past three years than any Nazarene church in USA/Canada. Perhaps the era of the shepherd-pastor is not over after all. Even if what I learn from leaders like Lloyd does not produce the same visible results in my ministry, I will still reap a great reward from following in his footsteps. It has been said that the most important outcome of anyone’s ministry is the kind of person they become in the process. If I can learn to cultivate healthy relationships in ministry, I will become the kind of person who thrives as a pastor, and more importantly, as a person.

SCOT T SHERWOOD is district superintendent of the Northwestern Illinois District Church of the Nazarene.

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 19


Building Relationships Across Lines of Culture and Economics S a m uel V assel

A

s God’s people, we are called to love God and to love our fellow human beings: It is our Great Commandment (Matthew 22:37–40). Our Great Commission given by the resurrected Jesus is to go to “all nations” to make disciples (Matt. 28:18–20). Keeping both the Great Commandment and the Great Commission necessitates building relationships with people across lines of race, nationality, class, and economic status. My experience as a pastor has engendered my deep conviction that Christians cannot bear effective witness to the truth of the gospel if we do not clearly demonstrate a conspicuous display of Christian unity across diverse cultures and classes. The attitudes and actions within Christian community must stand in sharp contrast to either polite indifference or open hostility toward those from different cultural or economic backgrounds. In this age of identity politics, discrimination, class distinction, and political tribalism, it is particularly important for Christian people to demonstrate a better way. This is a time of unique opportunity for all of us who follow Christ. Building relationships across lines of culture and economics is not merely a “nice thing” to attempt now, but a necessary focus of our engagement in the contemporary fight against what the Bible describes as “principalities and powers” of this world that war with the ways of Christ (see Ephesians 6:12). This witness is both vital to our identity as true disciples of Jesus (John 13:35) and, as Jesus indicates in His high priestly prayer to His Father, it is critical to

20 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

our ability to convince the world that Jesus is who He said He was (cf. John 17: 23). W h at J e s u s D e s i r e s

Crossing cultural barriers is never comfortable. It always requires a compelling motivation strong enough to overcome both the internal and external resistance we encounter. Loving obedience to Jesus is the compelling motivation for all believers. What Jesus wanted more than anything else for His followers­—both then and now, according to His prayer—was unity (John 17: 20–23a). Barriers must be overcome. Proclaiming God’s infinite love for all people will look like a joke if our proclamation is accompanied by hate, divisions, and discrimination. This is because the death of Jesus was not only about reconciling human beings to God, but also about reconciling human beings to one another (Eph. 2:14–18). Genuine Christ-followers who embrace the death of Christ as the source of their identity must necessarily embrace in the atonement the reconciling of people with fundamental differences to one another. Being a Christlike disciple means being joined with Christ as a reconciler of people to God and to one another (cf. 2 Corinthians 5:14–21). W h at T h e s e R e l at i o n s h i p s L o o k L i k e

Healthy relationships across cultural and economic lines must evidence mutual fellowship, mutual respect, mutual empathy, mutual truth-telling, mutual understanding, and intentional hospitality. The clear mission


of Christian community in the contemporary context is to demonstrate that our love for one another is practical and gives evidence of reconciliation. We should demonstrate that what we share in common—the transforming experience of the love of God in Christ—takes precedence over those elements of culture and economics that would otherwise keep us apart. The centripetal “pull” in Christ must be greater than the centrifugal “push” of cultural and economic difference. Intentional action, uncomfortable as it may be, demonstrates that reconciliation is the goal and that this goal can be achieved through Christ. One way we can do this is through Intentional fellowship. This simply implies that we must provide intentional opportunities for cross cultural gatherings. Scripture tells us that gathering together uniquely welcomes the presence of Jesus and should be encouraged (Matt. 18:20, Hebrews 10:24–25). We can also encourage mutual respect, which means that we must be willing to listen to one another. That is the only way we can learn about our varied perspectives. As writer Stephen Covey has explained in habit five of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.®” We all want to be understood in order to feel respected and significant. The pathway to being understood is intentional listening. People different from us, made in the image of God like us, and redeemed by the blood of Jesus just like us have a story to tell, and we indicate that they are important when we take time to listen to them. We can also practice mutual empathy, which means to intentionally “walk in the other person’s shoes.” This means that we openly listen to their life experiences. This is a reflection of the incarnational ministry of Jesus. It goes beyond intentional listening to intentionally seeking (as best we can) to feel what the other person is feeling. It is trying to experience the world as they are experiencing it. This degree of empathy signals a validation of their experiences and opens the door for authentic sharing and mutual trust. Mutual truth-telling and mutual understanding involve recognition that we are all interdependent, regardless of our

backgrounds or economic status. We are then open to receiving from one another, fully cognizant that we all have needs, as well as valuable things to offer to each other. An idea of hegemonic dominance, in which one’s self-understanding is that of intrinsic superiority, militates against truth-telling. Truth-telling flourishes when we honestly confront our own assumptions and prejudices. This vulnerable—even confessional—posture, in which one is able to receive as well as to give, is an indispensable expression of humility and is vital for fostering the hearing and speaking of truth. Finally, one of the hallmarks of the people of God in Scripture is the recognition of their responsibility as representatives of the God to welcome the disadvantaged and the “stranger.” This is intentional hospitality from a biblical perspective. The marginalized and the awkward “outsider” are consistently seen as the objects of God’s kindness. The New Testament even reveals some of these “outsiders” as potential representatives of God’s actions (the Good Samaritan), or even the bearers of the divine presence (Matthew 25:31–46). Intentional hospitality as encouraged by Scripture not only has the potential to break down barriers and turn strangers into lifelong friends, but it may also unknowingly open up an act of heavenly fellowship (Hebrews 13:2). Healthy cross-cultural relationships are ultimately the work of the Holy Spirit (Ephesians 4:3). He is the one who ignites this motivation for reconciliation within us. The Spirit of God clarifies our vision of Christ, so we are not satisfied with comfortable excuses and shallow tokenism but are moved to authentic practical demonstrations of the Christian mission in the world. The Holy Spirit empowers us to bear witness to Jesus by energizing us to love people who are different from us—reflecting God’s love for all of His children (Romans 5:8).

SA MUEL VASSEL is district superintendent of the Metro New York District Church of the Nazarene.

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 21


Adopted into the Kingdom B rian L . P o w ell

O

n November 19, 1989, a knock on the door changed my life. The years leading up to that day had been filled with rebellion against God and my family. I had turned to drugs and alcohol and made many bad choices along the way. In reality, I was running from everything good that God had placed in my life. I was too blind to see His grace at work. Several months prior, I had moved out of my parents’ house and was living with friends. I hadn’t spoken with my parents in months. On that particular day I wasn’t feeling well. The guys I was living with were out, and I had the house to myself. I remember having a heavy heart. I hadn’t slept much the night before. I thought about my grandmother, mother, and aunt, who had spent years praying for me. I wept.

22 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

Adopted Into

the

Kingdom

of

God

On November 19, when I opened the door, there stood the man I had been harboring anger toward: my father. Although I knew he loved me, I felt he had been too strict, too harsh, and far too religious. Yet for some reason, I missed him. I still had a deep longing to reconnect with him and to restore the brokenness that existed between us. Normally, he would have been stern with me in a situation like this. He would have told me what I needed to do to get my life back in


order. But that day, he stood with tears in his eyes and asked me if I was alright. He asked me if I would like to go for a ride and talk. Honestly, there was nothing I needed more, so I took him up on the offer. We ended up in front of Calvary Church of the Nazarene in North Carolina around 9:00 p.m. My dad asked me if I would like to go inside the church and pray. I told him I would. The pastor met us at the church. After a few minutes of talking about what God was doing in my heart, at approximately 9:15 p.m., I walked down the aisle of that dimly lit sanctuary, knelt at an altar, and gave my heart to Jesus. On that night the kingdom of God invaded my life and changed everything. Jesus became my Savior, and a passionate journey of following Him began. On November 19, 1989, my earthly father led me to the place where I met my heavenly Father. My dad was Jesus’ witness. Through his witness, my life has forever been changed. Another Adoption

September 15, 2014 was “Gotcha Day” for Kacey Xing-Yu. Over 50 couples were picking up their children the day we walked into the civil affairs office in Guangzhou, China. Once inside, everyone found a seat, and they called people forward alphabetically by last name. When our name was called we proceeded to the center of the room, and our child came from another room. In those moments, children were

united with their forever families. It is a beautiful part of the adoption process. Finally, they called our name: “Brian and Heather Powell.” From behind a closed door, Kacey emerged. She seemed scared to death, yet trying to smile. Most families were adopting younger children who really did not know what was going on. However, Kacey was old enough to know that her life was about to change forever. She came out with her orphanage director and one of her caregivers. None of them spoke English, and we knew minimal Mandarin. She was being very polite, but it was obvious that she was afraid. As the room started to clear, Kacey became more apprehensive. Finally, her caregivers told her goodbye for the last time. These were the only people she had ever known, and they were leaving her with two Americans with whom she could not communicate other than with a phone app. When the caregivers left the room, tears streamed down Kacey’s face. She was trying hard to hold them back, but she couldn’t. Those tears quickly turned to sobbing, and she began to cry out for her caregivers, who had already left. Ultimately, she walked away from us and began roaming the hallways calling out for her orphanage director. Heather and I followed her at a distance with tears streaming down our faces. We didn’t know what to do. Eventually, she found her orphanage director. As they spoke in Mandarin, we had no idea what they were saying. Our director told us that he was explaining to her that she had to go with us for at least one night. The law in China says an orphan over 10 years old has to agree to be adopted. That means they have to sign their name stating that they willfully choose to become the child of their adoptive family. However, the law also requires that they stay at least one night with the family seeking to adopt them. Our translator, who also served as our guide through the process, took Kacey aside and gently explained the rules to her. However, she wasn’t listening. Finally, they begin forcing her to walk out of the building with us. They pulled her down the hallway and out into the parking lot kicking and screaming. Once in the parking lot Kacey ran toward the orphanage director’s car. Kacey

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 23


hotel was over an hour. On the way, Kacey saw things she had never seen before. Her countenance began to change. As Kacey walked through the doors of the hotel, she was astonished. She kept saying, “Wow.” When we got to the room on the 15th floor, she looked out over the city in amazement. She discovered a jetted bathtub and wanted to know if she could take a bubble bath. She ended up taking one every night of our stay. We took her to eat at a fancy restaurant. She wanted to know what she could order. I told her “anything you want.” The table looked like a banquet fit for a queen. That night, Kacey Xing-Yu Powell fell asleep on a king size bed between a mom and dad on the 15th floor of a five-star hotel after taking a bubble bath and eating a fine meal. She fell asleep lavished with the love that only a mother and father could give. In one day, her entire world changed! is relatively strong for her age; she would have been very difficult to drag for two city blocks where the bus was parked. The fatherly instinct rose up inside me. I asked our guide, “Can I pick her up and carry her?” She said, “I didn’t want to ask, but that would be the best solution.” I looked Kacey in her tear-filled eyes and said several times, “wo-ai-ni” (I love you). Then I scooped her up and carried her kicking and screaming. In all of the confusion, Kacey failed to realize that something very important was taking place. In the midst of the struggle, we were trying to save her life. This was a rescue mission. At 14, she would have aged out of the adoption program. The Chinese government does not allow adoptions of children past age 14. Also, she was very sick and needed medical attention. I wanted to give her a life she had never experienced. I wanted to treat her as a good father would treat a beloved child, but fear was standing in the way: She was afraid. When we finally got to the bus, I carried her down the aisle to the back seat and sat her in the corner. I blocked the aisle, so there was no chance of her running away. She crossed her arms, looked up at me, and if looks could kill, I would be a dead man! The distance from the agency to our

24 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

A N e w F a m i ly

and a

New Life

Kacey now has a family. Most importantly, she has a Savior. A few months after she arrived back in the United States, she watched the Jesus Film in Mandarin. In our driveway, using a translation app on my phone, I led Kacey to Jesus with tears streaming down her little face. Fourteen years before, Kacey had been left on the steps of a hospital. She had lived her entire life with a life-threatening blood disorder that had never been properly treated. She resided in an orphanage in an obscure village in Southern China. She would have aged out of the adoption process five weeks after we arrived. Everything changed, because eight months earlier, God said to two strangers on the other side of the world, “Rescue her.” Kacey was an orphan for over a decade, but now she is a princess for life, and will forever be a daughter of the King!

BRIAN L . POWELL is district superintendent of the Kentucky District Church of the Nazarene.


LOOKING FOR NEW RESOURCES FOR YOUR CONGREGATION? CONSIDER A BULK SUBSCRIPTION TO HOLINESS TODAY Single subscription: $16 Bulk rate is just $7 each when you order two or more! All copies shipped directly to your church.

HolinessToday.org/SubscribePage

holinesstoday@nazarene.org

A magazine for everyday faith


INTERVIEW THE BENEFITS OF NA ZSAFE — 5 QUESTIONS: Q& A Inter view with L e slie Har t I N T E R V I E W E R : C H A R L E S W. C H R I S T I A N

1 . W H AT A R E T H R E E I M P O R TA N T F E AT U R E S O F N A Z A R E N E S A F E ? a. Prevention is the best protection. Implementing policies that protect children entrusted to our care is a must in today’s world, and the ministry environment is no exception. Nazarene Safe is an effective way to address this growing critical need. Five key steps will help every ministry protect every child: Raise Awareness, Screen Volunteers, Implement Policies, Monitor and Evaluate, Report and Respond. b. Awareness is essential. Raising awareness about sexual abuse of minors in the church is the foundation of any safety system. Many well-established churches have a false sense of security. We say things like, “We know and trust everyone here”; “We’ve known each other forever”; “Many of us are related family members.” Facts reveal that 95 percent of children who are abused are abused by someone they know and trust. One-third of children are abused by a parent or stepparent. There is no profile for identifying those who abuse. When people are informed and better understand the problem, they are much more likely and willing to support the needed changes that come with the implementation of new policies. Raising awareness is critical. Resources are provided to help each church get started. c. Screening volunteers is one of the most important policy elements for any church. It is also one of the most difficult for many churches to implement. Nazarene Safe

26 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

provides suggestions on how to tackle this key step. A background check is a ministry standard today, but it is estimated that only one in ten abusers appears on the national sex offender registry. Additional steps are necessary for due diligence. Require all volunteers to attend your church at least six-months prior to accepting a ministry responsibility. In addition, a ministry application helps gain vital information. A sample is provided at nazarene.org/nazarene-safe-docs to customize to the local ministry context. 2. HOW DOES NA Z ARENE SAFE PROTECT BOTH CHILDREN AND A D U LT S ? Implementing the steps outlined in Nazarene Safe provides a deterrent to those who may be looking for opportunities to engage in abusive activity. A predator may grow impatient when confronted by a six-month waiting period before gaining access to children or youth. Realizing there is a culture of awareness about the predator grooming process through required training of all volunteers may intimidate a predator because it raises the risk of his or her activities being discovered. Volunteers who receive training and follow the policies will protect themselves as well as children. One of the most critical policies for volunteers to follow is to never be alone with a minor. This single policy provides needed accountability for the volunteer in the case of an accusation.


volunteers, and the ministries they have been given. At least 30 of 78 districts on our region have conducted Nazarene Safe training events where our team has trained pastors and workers at a district-sponsored event. A few of these districts provided a series of training events throughout their districts. Some have hosted repeated training events every couple of years. However, with less than 50 percent of districts currently participating, many are still in need of valuable training. 5 . W H AT H A S U S A /C A N A DA CHILDREN’ S MINISTRIES DONE TO PROMOTE NA ZARENE SAFE? 3 . I N W H AT WAY S C A N N A Z A R E N E SAFE BUILD TRUST IN CHURCHES? In today’s world, parents expect any environment that cares for minors to provide policies and practices that strive to keep their children safe. When the church meets this standard, parents are able to be freed of a certain level of concern and distraction about their child’s safety regarding who is caring for their child. This leaves more room for the Holy Spirit to work in the hearts of these parents. In addition, when all church staff and all volunteers meet the same level of training and screening, with no exceptions, a bond to protect the ministry God has given the local church is achieved. All are vital members on the same team. 4 . W H AT H A S B E E N T H E R E S P O N S E S I N C E T H E D E N O M I N AT I O N ’ S EMPHASIS UPON NA ZARENE SAFE S TA R T E D? Our Board of General Superintendents has made strong statements about the responsibility of each church to provide policies that protect minors and requiring that those entrusted with positions of authority are to act in the best interest of those under their authority and care. There is now an item on the annual pastor’s report to note the actions taken to institute policies that protect minors from sexual abuse with the ministries of the church. Many churches have embraced the changes, creating and implementing policies to protect children,

It is my goal to offer Nazarene Safe training at all denomination-wide events such as PALCON, TEACH, General SDMI Convention, District Leaders’ Conference, Ignite Conference, Spark, and at every opportunity on the district and local level. Trainings are often customized to fit the needs and time constraints of participants. Four primary sessions have been developed: Raising Awareness: The Need for Nazarene Safe; A Systematic Approach: Creating and Implementing Policies; Strategizing and Prioritizing with Your Team; The Next Steps: When Sex Offenders Attend Your Church. Free resources and trainings have been developed and offered through nazarene.org. The latest exciting development is the landing page nazarene.org/nazarene-safe, where all free resources can be accessed from one location. I am available to answer questions and provide connections to resources at lhart@nazarene.org. LESLIE HART is children’s ministries coordinator for the Church of the Nazarene USA/Canada.

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 27


D iane L e c ler c

T

he study of the nature and person of Jesus Christ is called “Christology.” Let’s be honest. It can be quite heady and abstract. But if we can peel away the complicated theological words (words like homoousios and perichoresis), as important as they are, perhaps we can see that who Jesus is matters in our everyday lives, because our very salvation depends on Him. We believe that Jesus is both fully God and fully human and participates fully in the Trinity, and that He can truly empathize with our humanity. Only He can save and redeem all of us who trust in Him: “Neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, neither male nor female, for [we] are all one in Christ Jesus” (Galatians 3:28). In other words, we are all equal at the foot of the cross, and we who are many are made one there. Of course, this does not take our differences away completely. In another sense, then, it is legitimate to ask this question: How do women, in particular, find their identity in the identity of Jesus?

28 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019


We recognize that Jesus treats women with love and respect in the Gospels. The Gospels tell us that women were the first witnesses and testifiers of Jesus’ resurrection. Before this, we saw Jesus’ interaction with many women, including the woman at the well, the bleeding woman, the woman caught in the act of adultery, and the woman He forgave after she anointed His feet. There were also women who ministered along with Him and even to Him. There is evidence that women supported Jesus financially and that He loved many women with a deep friendship (phileo in Greek). We know how important the mother of Jesus was to His ministry, as well as Mary Magdalene and Mary and Martha. The Book of Luke especially highlights how Jesus saw women as fully human and as worthy of His attention. He treated women with dignity. Following

the

Example

of

Jesus

It is in no small part because of this biblical witness of Jesus’ disposition toward women that people in the Church of the Nazarene and other denominations have always seen women as important to the life of the church. The fact that we have ordained women to all offices of the church from the very beginning is symbolic of our view of women. Unlike some other evangelical denominations that believe God ordained women to be subordinate in society, church, and home, the holiness movement affirms their full equality, because it holds to a theology that says the effects of Pentecost reverse the effects of the Fall in Genesis 3. If you were a holiness person in the 19th century, you were an abolitionist, you advocated for the poor and downtrodden, and you supported the rights of women. How do these biblical and historic truths affect women today? We know that women have often been mistreated. Women have not been exempted from suffering in the modern tragedies of history, from slavery to Aushwitz to Vietnam. Even daily social media brings us news of abuse that women endure, from rape and poverty to domestic violence. Women of every age group and economic background can tell stories of

abuse and neglect. Historically, women have experienced delays in voting rights and in receiving equal pay for equal work. Does Jesus have anything to say to women who have experienced these injustices? Jesus, High Priest

for

All

One of the most powerful images of Jesus is the image of the high priest found in the Book of Hebrews. Jesus is a mediator, a perfect high priest who is fully able to identify with God to reveal God to us. He is also a perfect high priest who fully identifies with us as human and is able to represent us to God. As such, what does our high priest do? He is our healer. To all of those who experience abuse, neglect, and unfair treatment, including women, Jesus brings both empathy and healing. Jesus allowed himself to enter fully into human suffering, to be despised and rejected, to be abandoned and broken, and to be wounded and pierced. He allowed himself to be victimized in order to empathize with and embrace the victim. Jesus was also resurrected, and offers to all of us, including women, resurrection life and power. Jesus calls us to rise and find our identity in Him. Jesus calls us to live in His kind of freedom, accept His life-giving touch on our hearts, and take in His liberating presence. Jesus calls us to be renewed in the image of God, to be filled with the Spirit, and to walk in newness of life. Jesus calls us to know Him as our redeemer, our deliverer, and our strength. Jesus dignifies and humanizes women today, just as He did long ago. May the whole church, unified in mission and purpose, continue Christ’s priestly work of healing and empowerment for all, and live into His vision of true unity within his body

DIANE LECLERC is professor of historical theology at Northwest Nazarene University.

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 29


ATTENTION, MEN: Christianity is Best Lived in Community

K err y W . W illis Pride precedes a disaster, and an arrogant attitude precedes a fall. —Proverbs 16:18, God’s Word Translation

M

any people hold to the adage that Christianity is best lived in community. After many years of working in men’s ministry, my paraphrase of that saying goes something like this: Men, beware! Christianity is best lived in community. Beware of what? Many men seem wired to avoid community. This avoidance of community is spiritually harmful and must be challenged until changed by men who claim to be Jesus-believers. We quickly become spiritually dull unless we allow others to join us in our faith walk. The mostquoted scripture in men’s ministry is probably Proverbs 27:17 (NASB): “Iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” A n I m p o r ta n t E a r ly L e s s o n

For 24 years, it was my joy to pastor Harrisonburg, Virginia First Church of the Nazarene. We were truly blessed to see that congregation grow from 120 parishioners to 1,200. A key factor in that growth was that men in our church began to recognize the importance of being in community. Though I left the local church in 2018 to become the district superintendent in Philadelphia, the new pastor recently invited me to help teach at the local church’s 25th anniversary of the “Keepers of the Light” men’s retreat. It was 25 years ago when the Lord gave me a vision to reach men and to connect them to one another, and so I planned a men’s retreat.

30 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

The first year, 19 men joined us. Now, over 100 men attend annually, including men from other churches. From the very beginning, the retreat has been more than just a three-day event by the sea. It became part of a lifestyle change in our church: men sharing life together. The reason behind our growth was a mystery to me until I had been pastoring for about 10 years and heard Dr. H. B. London speak at a district pastors’ and spouses’ retreat. During one of the teaching sessions, Rev. London revealed a fact that struck me as the most practical reason for our local church’s growth: A recent study had revealed that if a man is the first in a family to come to Christ and the church, 94 percent of these men will lead their entire family to Christ and the local church. To this day, whenever I am asked what is the first thing I would do if I were beginning a new ministry, I always say that I would begin ministry by calling men into community and plan a retreat! I have already put plans in place as a district superintendent to make sure we have men’s retreats on the Philadelphia District. I have learned that in our culture, when men embrace community, everything changes. And often, women are among the most excited to see this embrace of community happen among men. When we as Jesus-believing men avoid community, we run a high risk of becoming something altogether different than Christian men. If we as men choose to foolishly go it alone, we can expect brokenness and pain. Christianity is best lived in community!


Here are a few reasons why I often begin my emphasis on community to men with a notation to “Beware!”

and open ourselves to true community, it combats our ignorance and allows us to experience the fullness of God’s gifts.

#1: Beware: Isolation can be the first step down the staircase to destruction. Indeed, isolation may seem safe at first, and in certain seasons of our lives it can offer holy solitude to our souls, but isolation overdone can eventually turn to darkness. Pastors and other leaders who spend too much time alone, even in study, may seem spiritual. However, it becomes easy to hide from a congregation who believes their pastor is too busy to be bothered. Close community can be frightening, even (especially) to pastors. Most of us (like me) are introverts and prefer our times alone. In fact, I dreaded getting ready and driving to the first gathering of our life group. But after a few sessions, it became the highlight of my week. I learned that hiding behind titles like “pastor” and “introvert” are not proper justification, because God has called us to life together in relationship with Him and also with others. God knows that too much isolation that can lead to destruction, drifting, and bad, selfcentered choices.

#3: Beware: Idolatry can be the third step down the staircase to destruction. Too many times in the lives of my friends and colleagues in ministry, I have observed that a love affair with isolation can lead to spiritual ignorance and even idolatry. Isolation overdone can slowly but surely do away with integrity and erode accountability. When God sends others to correct us, our isolation allows us to delay them with excuses about how busy we are. The words of Oswald Chambers warn us about this: “Beware the barrenness of a too-busy life.” If we are too busy, we surely are not living a Christlike life. Jesus made time for others, and though we find Jesus seeking alone time, it was always to regain power and perspective so that He might reenter community and truly minister to the needs of people. The Father was the focus of Jesus in His alone time. That is not isolation; it is intimacy. Sadly, too much alone time can become isolation and ignorance, and pride can creep in, causing us to lose sight of God. The pride that can creek in is a form of idolatry: trusting our own ways over the ways of God—including godly wisdom from others!

#2: Beware: Ignorance can be the second step down the staircase to destruction. Isolation overdone can lead to ignorance. This is because, as Ken Blanchard, author of The One-Minute Manager, has said, “None of us is as smart as all of us.” “Lone Ranger” leaders miss out on the depth that community can offer. Years ago our son attended a Nazarene Youth Conference in Houston. Our local church was experiencing some growth at that time, and so my son was asked by several pastors there, “What is the secret to what your dad is doing there?” He answered: “My dad knows how to get good people around him!” This was humbling, yet true. I have never referred to those who minister alongside me as associates, only as partners. I have never been intimidated by talented and godly people that God sends my way. They actually inspire me. When I chose to reject being a one-man show, the Lord entrusted me with faithful ministry partners. When we refuse isolation

I s o l at i o n

as

D o o rw ay

to a

M u lt i t u d e

of

Sins

Finally, isolation overdone can lead once-godly men (and women) to an arrogance that convinces us that we are the source of all wisdom and power. This attitude has led even holy people to adultery, abuse, and even addiction. Let us come out of hiding and rejoin community for the good of the church, for the good of our families, and especially for the good of our own souls. Christianity is best lived in community!

KERRY W. WILLIS is district superintendent of the Philadelphia district of the Church of the Nazarene.

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 31


Single and in Ministry:

Joy in the Journey D ana P reus c h

I

never set out to be a single person. Nor have I ever felt a specific call to singlehood. I am not sure I could enumerate all the reasons why I’ve remained a single person all my life. In short, it’s simply how my story has unfolded. Regardless, I have tried to live life to the fullest in the midst of that reality, and (maybe surprisingly to some) I have found much joy in the journey. Now, an immediate disclaimer: Have I struggled with loneliness over the years? Yes, I have. Have I endured periods of deep isolation? Yes, at times. Have I ever found myself grieving over what I’ve lost along the way—a life companion, children? Absolutely. Singleness has not always been an easy path. It has its own unique set of challenges. Sadness, loneliness, and grief have all been a part of the tapestry of my story. Yet again I have to say that great joy has marked my journey, too.

32 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

Answering

the

A w k w a rd Q u e s t i o n s

When I meet people for the first time, one question I often get is, “Do you have children?” I have learned to answer (with a smile) that I have many spiritual children. One Mother’s Day weekend in the first congregation I served, a dear lady thanked me for being the “mother of our church.” That encounter and that phrase have stuck with me. Looking back on my life in ministry, mother has indeed become an expansive and generative metaphor for this holy calling. Over the years, pastoral ministry has afforded me the privilege of mothering in significant ways. For example, welcoming newborns at a hospital bed and then welcoming them into the larger family of the church when baptizing or dedicating them are cherished roles. Sharing a cup of coffee with a college student needing a surrogate parent and direction about their future or counseling a young couple about their marriage goals are also important components of pastoral ministry. Other pastoral roles are similar to parenting roles for men and women in ministry, whether married or single, including sitting with a parish family at mealtime, enjoying robust conversation and laughter with their young children, and holding the hand of a dear brother or sister in Christ as we prepare to bury his or her loved one. These pastoral acts have enabled me to be mother, daughter, sister, auntie, and even grandma! The work of pastoral ministry has enabled me to be an integral part of a family. So again, this journey of singlehood has had its share of grief and loneliness, but also much joy. The Bible Values Singleness

The Apostle Paul tried to give the Corinthian Church a window into the joys and benefits of the single life in 1 Corinthians 7. He urged those who could not control their desires to marry, but for the person with the capacity to remain single, Paul commended this lifestyle wholeheartedly. Specifically, he recommended this path because of its potential kingdom impact. Paul wrote: “In everything you do, I want you to be free from the concerns of this life. An unmarried man


can spend time doing the Lord’s work and thinking how to please Him. But a married man cannot do that so well. He has to think about his earthly responsibilities and how to please his wife. His interests are divided. In the same way, a woman who is no longer married or has never been married can be more devoted to the Lord in body and in spirit, while the married woman must be concerned about her earthly responsibilities and how to please her husband. I am saying this for your benefit, not to place restrictions on you. I want you to do whatever will help you serve the Lord best, with as few distractions as possible” (7:32-35,NLT, emphasis mine). As a single pastor, I have experienced the reality of Paul’s words. Since I do not have to attend to the needs of a spouse or children, there are ways of using my time that are unavailable to a married person. I am less harried. I have less angst about a meeting going longer than expected or about getting interrupted at home at night by a parishioner who just needs to talk. I can easily immerse myself in the spiritual disciplines of solitude and silence, which can enable me to be more present, connected, and intimate with people when I am with them. Making decisions about the next ministry assignment has proven relatively uncomplicated over the years. I could easily move to an assignment for a lower salary, because my needs were few. I did not have to worry about my spouse finding a new job or finding a good school for my kids. In my most recent move, I was able to live with good friends in their upstairs guest room for over a year. In this situation, I was able to enjoy companionship and family life while concentrating on the work in front of me. As a single person, I have been grateful for this ability to be agile and mobile. Intentionality

and the

can sometimes make assumptions about the single pastor’s ability to attend to ministry programs or needs simply because he or she is single. However, the single pastor’s status should never give others license to take advantage. Nor should the single pastors misuse the gift of time given to them. It is incumbent upon me to manage my time well, in God-honoring ways, so that my life can make the greatest impact possible for the kingdom of God and not devolve into selfish or trivial pursuits. Being a healthy single person in ministry requires intentionality when it comes to relationships, too. Good friends and healthy relationships with parishioners and ministry colleagues are a must. Finding and investing in a supportive local ministerial cohort and maintaining connections with ministry friends consistently should be top priority for the single pastor (and all pastors for that matter). When possible, I have always made it a point to build intentional relationships with the spouses of those with whom I serve too. These relationships have proved to be life giving and have often enhanced my relationships with my colleagues in ministry. I have tried to invest in entire families as well, inviting them to my home for dinner or inviting myself to their homes from time to time! As I said, I never set out to be a single person. My journey has not always been easy. It has sometimes been marked by loneliness and grief, but I have tried to live life to the fullest in the midst of this reality. I can say unequivocally that joy has been woven all the way through. I am so grateful for this gift and the many other gifts I have received all along the way. If you find yourself a fellow traveler on this road, I pray that, even amid the challenges, your path would be marked by much joy, too.

Single Life

Of course, being a healthy (and joyful!) single person in ministry requires intentionality. For example, though I tend to have more discretionary time than my colleagues who are married, it is imperative that I set boundaries. Unfortunately, parishioners and other ministry colleagues

DANA PREUSCH currently serves as the director of the Center for Pastoral Leadership & Alumni Relations at Nazarene Theological Seminary. She has pastored in Olathe, Kans.; Raleigh, N.C.; and Nashville, Tenn.

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 33


The Lost Art of Pastoral Prayers A nn L . C o k er

D

uring Sunday morning worship service, should we expect a prayer led by the pastor? Over the years, worship has changed. My husband and I have noticed that often the pastor does not lead in a prayer during worship. Either a layperson leads, or there is no corporate prayer time at all. Corporate prayer is for the people. According to the worship notes at the church where we attend: “Prayers of the people is a moment in our worship when we have an extended time of prayer together. [They are not] merely the prayers of the pastor. Be encouraged not to let this time go by without actively investing your mind and heart.” We surveyed several ministers, and they offered their opinions and observations on pastoral prayers. One missionary pastor wrote, “Prayer has become more important, because it is an essential aspect of worship while building the church community in their love of God and for each other.” S h o u l d W e E x p e c t P a s t o r a l P r ay e r

Our first question: Should we expect a pastor-led prayer? It seems the early church did: “They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer” (Acts 2:42, NIV). Prayer is linked with preaching, fellowship, and Holy Communion. Jesus led the disciples and others in prayer (see Matthew 6 and John 17), and the letters of Paul often end with prayers and benedictions. Prior to my husband Bill’s entrance into the ministry, he observed that every minister he knew included a prayer in the worship service. So, when he started pastoring, he followed the pattern of praying during worship. Bill expected it and felt the people welcomed it. During these moments, the pastor has the opportunity to share issues of concern with the congregation. Hearing their pastor pray can fill a need in a congregation’s spiritual development. “We know this habit [of pastoral prayer] reminds people that God

34 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

is able to care for them regardless of the situation,” one minister wrote. The Significance

of

P a s t o r a l P r ay e r

Why is a pastor-led prayer important? First of all, corporate prayer involves the church community in worship. The pastoral prayer during worship gives everyone opportunity to connect. It can be a focused time when we express our trust in God’s provision together. We express corporate concern about the needs of others. The pastor, as Jesus did, can model prayer for those under his or her care. The pastor is often intimately acquainted with the needs and concerns of those under his or her care. When someone is hurting, sick, or grieving, this kind of public and corporate support is important. People can participate in petition for a member’s need by offering prayers together under the leadership of the one who is called to shepherd them. They do not even have to know the person’s specific needs in detail, but can trust that the pastor likely knows and is voicing this concern on behalf of the congregation. Prayer unites people, and the pastor’s invitation to pray for one another gives focus and direction to that prayer. There’s no greater way for the pastor to express his or her love and concern for the people than to lead them to the throne of grace to bear one another’s burdens: “If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it” (1 Corinthians 12:26). One minister offered: “It’s also possible that visitors hearing the pastoral prayer might recognize that church members care about each other.” P r e pa r i n g

to

P r ay

Opinions and practices differ among the ministers interviewed, but most prepare their prayers, even writing them out before time for the service. For Bill, the preparation of the


prayer was as important to him as offering it. He set apart time to be in tune with the Lord and the church body. During the week, he might gather notes for prayer, but the writing happened in one sitting, usually in his office before anyone entered, while he was alone with God and mindful of his responsibility of shepherding the flock God gave him. One retired minister emphasized that he needed time to think through all of the needs before going to the pulpit. Most worship times only last an hour, so pastoral prayer should be carefully prepared. He went on to say, “The pastor is both priest and prophet: the priest represents the people during the prayer time; the prophet speaks God’s Word in the sermon.” Some write out the pastoral prayer ahead of time. My husband believes that the pastoral prayer is important enough to invest the time in preparation, just as he does with his sermon. The people are important enough to hear a prayer that’s been prepared ahead. An ex tempore (ad lib) prayer, may cause the pastor to forget important details and go off on tangents. This often results in lengthy pastoral prayers that lack substance. Prayers written out can be timed and fit into the worship service appropriately. One minister wrote, “Extemporaneous prayers are fine for some occasions, but preparation shows the importance of giving thought to remembering the community’s concerns, current events, the nature of the God we serve, and the proper use of language addressing God.” One minister responded: “For me, notes allow some flexibility and also prompting of the Spirit, for needs may arise that morning before I step up to pray.” Another responded: “It helps those attending to realize that their pastor is in touch with what’s going on in the world and that he sincerely cares about the needs of others worldwide.” W h at

is

Included

in a

phrases. The prayer is for all people, all ages, and all backgrounds. It is not a place to show off one’s education. One minister said that he avoids too much detail about physical illnesses due to privacy concerns: “Don’t use the prayer as the church bulletin board regarding hospitalizations, surgeries, etc.” Another minister agreed: “Discretion should be used when including specific names of people in the prayer. In times of bereavement, I would definitely pray for a family by name regarding the loss of a loved one. Those sick and/or hospitalized could best be included in a more generic manner.” Other additions can include spiritual needs of the congregation and community, including prayers for those in religious and political authority. The church appreciates being united in prayer during worship. Often parishioners would ask Bill about a particular reference in prayer. Because his prayer was written, he could share what was requested. One woman frequently asked for a copy of his prayer to take home and use both for her private worship and for her children, whom she homeschooled. Sometimes when a person heard about a particular need expressed in prayer, he or she would ask how they could help. At these times, God used the prayer itself to help facilitate an answer to the prayer! While few people may express thanks for the pastor’s prayer, churches recognize the sincerity of the concern of the pastor through his or her public prayers for them. With a smile, one pastor said, “I think people paid more attention to my pastoral prayer than my message.” Note: Assistance with this article came from written responses from pastors Barry Bostrom, Henry Date, Charles Lake, and Bill Vermillion, along with others.

P a s t o r a l P r ay e r

Most prayers usually begin with praise and thanksgiving, then include the concerns for that week, and close with offering the people to God for His direction in worship. An encouraging portion of a hymn, a book, or a scripture passage may also be added. It helps to avoided complicated words or

ANN L . COKER is married to her favorite pastor, who has led many prayers during over 30 years in the pastorate. Her publications mainly include devotionals and magazine articles.

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 35


Breaking into a Church: A Widow’s Story K at h erine C ra w f ord

36 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

T

wo years ago, my brother-in-law in the Pacific Northwest died. His wife, my sister, and family did not have any church affiliation. I called the nearest church of my denomination, and we were told we could use the church facilities for the memorial service and luncheon. I stayed with my sister for a month, and each Sunday we attended church. Then I flew back to the Midwest for a while. My sister, a new widow, did not attend the church while I was in the Midwest, and no one called her. Four months later, seven years after my own husband’s death, I moved from the Midwest to the Pacific Northwest. After 55 years of serving in churches, I thought I would be accepted and loved into any body of believers. After attending for four Sundays, I thought someone besides the pastor might know me, but this was not so. Still, the pastor’s messages were biblically based, and the church is only 15 minutes from where my sister and I live. If I wanted to keep my sister attending services with me, I figured I had better stay put in the nearest church. Still, I felt lost in the midst of a busy congregation with many youth ministry programs. For over a year I asked my friends across many states this question, “How do you break into a church?” My single friend served on staff in a mega church in Hawaii, but now lives in the Midwest. She said one Sunday she arrived at a large church where the pews looked full. “An usher stood on the other side of the doorway,” she said. “He never looked my way. Half way through the service, I sat on the floor to listen to the message. Only the pastor spoke to me after service.” Rebecca said of her church experience: “I’m not shy, but after a couple Sundays in a new church where no one spoke to me, I stopped going back.” She said she filled out a visitor’s card, but no one contacted her. “If I didn’t think I needed Christian fellowship,” she said. “I would stay home and watch TV.” Eleven years ago, doctors told my friend Donna she had six months to live. Forced to move, she searched for a new church. “So, where do I find a church for misfits?” Donna


asked. “As a single divorced woman, now retired and who wears her illness outwardly, I am indeed a misfit. No one sees me. They see my oxygen and my walker, and they assume they know my story. But nobody bothers to ask. I am a misfit, but I am not invisible to God.” In larger churches with a staff, people are sometimes assigned to follow up with new attendees. What about members, though? Kathy shared how she served on a ministry team for 18 years of the 25 her family were members of a church. Yet when she and her husband divorced, not one of the seven pastoral staff ever contacted her. “Not even my Christian sisters came to see me,” Kathy said. “It’s been four years. I pay my tithe, but now I watch the services online. I can’t stand the pain of realizing that no one cares if I show up or not.” As for me, my husband and I met and married in a church. After wavering in our faith for a few years, we searched for a church in our new community. We were young and needed guidance. The greeters reached out to us that day and in the weeks to come. My husband became a minister. After his retirement, we stayed active in the church. And then he died. Our church families, along with our children, surrounded me. I felt loved and protected until at age 76, I retired from my job and moved from the Midwest to the Northwest. Why is it so difficult to break into a church? For five weeks, Karen and I attended worship service. In the sixth week, I walked into the adult Sunday school class. To my dismay, no one in the class recognized me. It is now eighteen months later. Karen and I are still attending the same church. Why? The reason is that God put me here on purpose. John 15:16 says, “You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last.” While it is true anyone can stream worship music and a solid, biblically based message, I see my sister changing by being in this body of believers. People like me and my widowed sister need Christian fellowship. How do we fix the brokenness of our church outreach? The answer: One person at a time. I began to ask what I could do to help

others who had trouble adjusting to a new church. I sent notes to people on the prayer list from the bulletin. I call the widowed like me. Here is the good news: After I expressed my feeling lost in a Sunday school class, two senior families decided to begin “The Senior Saints” lunches once a month. The pastor and board agreed. At the end of the first luncheon, one of the wives asked if I would pray. Instead of prayer, I invited these senior adults to sing the doxology. The next month I received a phone call. “Do you think you might host the upcoming lunch.” “Yes, and I’ll ask Karen to help me,” I answered. To my surprise, Karen helped me prepare food, and I watched my shy sister—a woman who had not attended church since her teens—introduce herself to others. This experience causes me to continually ask, “How can I get acquainted and help others do the same?” Because I’ve talked with many people— especially single women—I know how lonely they are. Most of them are strong believers, but how do we reach those like Karen? I’m convinced our church is healthy and growing. We have an active children’s and youth group. Our pastor is a caring, godly man. But the fact is, he cannot be the minister to everyone and fill every need. Have I made a dent in my church yet? No. Most do not know my name, but I am learning theirs. I’ve made it my challenge. In January a year ago I claimed 2 Corinthians 3:1–3 for the year: “You show that you are a letter from Christ, the result of our ministry, written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts” (2 Corinthians 3:3). We have work to do. There are still many who are trying to “break in.”

K ATHERINE “K AT” CRAWFORD is a freelance writer who currently resides in Oregon.

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 37


THE PASTOR’S

SI P NO T EURS V EIEW LIVING BESIDE THE CALL: Five A reas of Prayer for S p ouses of Pastor s by Jill B arb er

A

s long as I can remember, I wanted to follow Jesus. My parents were faithful to disciple me and to raise me in the church. I studied at a Christian college and met the man I fell in love with. I was excited to set up house and start a family, and I was prepared to love him forever. What I wasn’t prepared for was the impact his call to ministry would have on my life. There are five particular areas of focus I have had to continually learn to navigate in this life I call “living beside the call.” Money

You aren’t in ministry very long before you learn you’re probably not going to get rich. Ministry isn’t about the money; it’s about something much more important. Sometimes the spouse of the called one can feel like he or she is not “doing ministry” simply because he or she has to work a secular job. Nothing could be further from the truth! Here is what I have learned: For years I worked outside of the church and home, and no one was telling me I was part of the ministry. However, I came to realize that my job was helping provide for my family, which in turn was strengthening the pursuit of the vocational ministry calling of my husband. I discovered that my work and my income were helping to move the kingdom of God forward. Spouses who work inside or outside of the home: You are fully invested in ministry! C h i l dr e n

Children are precious blessings from God. Just like you, they also feel the impact of the call to pastoral ministry. You and your children live under the umbrella of the call. Our kids are on the front lines of ministry. Sometimes we need to protect them

38 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

from certain church people, and sometimes we need to protect them from our own hurts, frustrations, and fears about life and ministry. Our kids grow up way too fast, and they are more perceptive than we often realize. I am learning that God loves my children even more than I do. Pray with your kids. Pray for your kids. Help them realize that the most important things in your life are your relationship with the Lord, your spouse, and them. Transitions

Transitions are tough, even when you know that the timing is right. When building a house, the foundation comes first. Transitions are like building a house, but in reverse. When you move, it is like taking the structure, the decorations, and all the pretty things with you, but it takes a while for the foundation to arrive at the new location. In my experience, it’s usually around the two-or-three year mark before the new place becomes “home.” When the foundation comes, you will know it. There’s a deep sense of peace, and you can finally say, “We’re home.” In the middle of transitions, I have learned to hold on and take one day at a time. God will provide His peace when the foundation finally arrives. Loneliness

Loneliness can be daunting. We’ve all had the experience of standing in a crowd and feeling completely alone. I believe this is a ripple effect of living what I call the “100 percent twice” kind of life. When we live beside the call, we live 100 percent in ministry while also being 100 percent a layperson. This can make it difficult to know who we can talk to and in whom we


We

m u s t n o t a l l o w o u r s e lv e s t o

be ensl aved by the voices that try to make us something we were not created or called to be.

can confide. This is when loneliness hits us hardest. The remedy for this takes time and effort. Everyone needs someone to talk to, but looking for a confidant inside the church can be difficult, especially at first. However, we need to be able to talk, to vent, and to be truly heard by someone who understands and cares. One option is to have individuals or even a network of support. Maybe that means a friend in another state, a counselor, or another pastor or spouse not directly associated with your home church. The Lord will help you discern the safety and reliability of these important connections, and then loneliness can dissipate. The Pressure

I truly wish I could take the pressure away for everyone living beside the call. However, our role as spouses can be filled with pressure, since every congregation will have its own expectations about our role and what gifts we should have. These expectations are often unspoken at first, but as time goes on, they can cause internal and external struggles as we seek to work alongside our spouse in ministry. Many of these expectations can be unfair. It can feel as though being who you are just isn’t enough. Added to this is the pressure that some spouses feel these days to pursue their own ordination. Some are called to be ordained together, but others are not. Ordination is never a determination of our value to the kingdom of God or to the ministry of our

spouse. Learning to be at peace and to have confidence in what God has for you and your own family is the key to dealing with this kind of pressure. I am learning that the Spirit of God can give us God’s peace to help us thrive despite these kinds of pressures. Finding Freedom

as a

Pastor’s Spouse

Is it possible to have freedom as we live beside the call? I absolutely believe it’s possible! It takes intentionality, but we can have freedom. This freedom begins when we consistently remind ourselves of that we are all valuable in God’s sight: We are children of the King! We must not allow ourselves to be enslaved by the voices that try to make us something we were not created or called to be. Those are not your true identity. We are called to live and serve beside our spouses as the children of God we were created to be. We are not called to assume someone else’s identity. This is the key to true freedom and peace as a pastor’s spouse. This doesn’t mean life will be any easier, but it does help us maintain a healthy perspective for ourselves and for our family: Know to whom you belong, and live boldly in Him!

JILL BARBER is a pastor’s spouse in Lenexa, Kansas. Check out her Living Beside the Call . . . As Me support group on Facebook and Instagram.

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 39


SEMINARY

SPOTLIGHT

MENTORING FOR MINISTRY

B y M ar k W al k er

I still remember the first time I was called “pastor.” I was just out of seminary and a small church had called me to be their pastor. I had not been there long when I received a phone call that the treasurer and his wife had been in an accident. As I walked into the hospital waiting room, I saw the faces of the family instantly relax. Immediately I was struck with fear, thinking, How can they trust that all will be fine just because I walked in the room? I realized quickly that it is one thing to preach a sermon, lead a Bible Study, or pray at a potluck, but it is another thing to be a pastor. This leads to the question: How is it that a person comes to embody the role of pastor? A natural response might be to say that it just takes time. While that is certainly true, I would also suggest that having a mentor can be extremely beneficial in this process. The Focus of Mentoring Mentoring has become a popular topic. In fact, there is so much talk about mentoring that it can be difficult to sort through the many voices. So, in the midst of all of this, how do we know what mentoring really is? At its most basic level, mentoring is a relationship of influence that is focused on the growth or development of the mentored. When we focus on mentoring pastors, I would suggest that there are three primary areas of focus: character formation, vocational identity, and practical skills. A life of a pastor is always demanding, but the early days of ministry can be overwhelming. With all there is to learn and do, areas of character formation, vocational identity, and practical skill development can take a backseat to a neverending to-do list. That is why having a mentor can be so beneficial in one’s early days of ministry. Much of formal clergy preparation is focused on education. However, pastors are called to not only proclaim the good news of Jesus, but also to embody it. This is why character matters and

40 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

why it is so critical for pastors to create time and space for God’s sanctifying grace to be made manifest in their life. At the same time, pastors are often asked to perform many functions: social worker, counselor, engaging speaker, administrator, and so on. In the midst of a job description that seems to have no end, what does it mean to be a pastor? Without opportunities to process and reflect, it is easy for one’s pastoral identity to be formed by the demands of others rather than be shaped by God’s call. Finally, while character and calling make one fit for ministry, the mastery of skills makes a person ready for ministry. There are many skills that pastors should be familiar with, but pastoral ministry has weekly rhythms that shape much of what we do: the leading of corporate worship (preaching and sacraments), nurturing of the congregation (pastoral care and discipleship), and administration. Experience in these areas is certainly helpful, but the chance to reflect on experience, with the wisdom and perspective of another, is invaluable. The Mentor There are certain traits that are characteristic of good mentors. All mentors should value the uniqueness and individuality of their mentees. This is rooted in the conviction that God works in and through all of God’s people. Based on this conviction, mentors seek to identify where God is at work in the lives of those they mentor. The best mentors are godly people who have fully and heartily embraced God’s calling, are humble enough to realize they do not know it all, and yet, are experienced enough to be able to share from their own journey. The Practice of Mentoring Since mentoring is about the ongoing formation of an individual, rather than the acquisition of basic skills, mentoring typically occurs in the midst of the demands and responsibilities of ministry. For this reason, I am a strong proponent


of an action-reflection model of mentoring. The action side refers to the actual doing of ministry: preaching a sermon, leading a board meeting, dealing with conflict, managing one’s time, etc. Experience in these areas of ministry is important, but action without reflection is a missed opportunity. Reflection provides the space to learn and grow from our experiences, and this is where a mentor can be truly beneficial. At times it might be helpful for a mentor to share from his or her own experiences and the ways in which God formed and shaped their life. However, often a mentor simply creates time and a safe place for reflection to occur. There are all sorts of questions that a mentor might ask, such as: How is God forming you through this experience? What are you learning about what it means to be a pastor in this unique context? In what ways did you handle this situation well? How would you handle this situation differently next time? Creating an opportunity for reflection allows the mentee to learn and grow from their experiences as he or she lives into the calling of Christ upon his or her life.

The call to pastoral ministry is a high and holy calling, and the life of a pastor is both incredibly rewarding and incredibly challenging. A mentor is a helpful companion on this journey. By offering his or her life, space, humility, and prayer, a mentor helps to create a fertile space in which the mentee can discover the mystery, joy, and power of God’s call to be “Pastor.”

M ARK WALKER is pastor of Spokane Valley Church of the Nazarene and one of the leaders of Mentoring for Ministry through the Center for Pastoral Leadership at Nazarene Theological Seminary. Mentoring for Ministry is a mentor-led peer group program specifically targeted to address the challenges faced by new clergy. Cohorts meet twice yearly for a five-day retreat session that includes education, spiritual formation, mentoring, fellowship, and more. For more information, or to support Mentoring for Ministry go to cpl.nts.edu.

CPL.NTS.EDU Lifelong Learning Video Library Access Mentoring Programs High Quality Learning Events Library and Productivity Software

10% off a one-year subscription with promo code: SUM19


FROM THE

AUTHOR F I V E Q U E S T I O N S W I T H L E S PA R R OT T L es Parrott , L ove L ike That: 5 Relationship S e cre ts from Je sus ( Thomas Nelson , 2018).

1. Name one or two key factors that prompted the original idea for this book.

Love Like That is the result of a long quest. I’ve written several books on relationships over the years, but I’ve always known that truly successful and healthy relationships are the result of loving like Jesus (see John 15:12 and Ephesians 5:2). The bar for doing so, however, seems so high. Can anyone really do this? We all fail in our attempts to love like Jesus, but if we follow Christ we keep trying. So, I wanted to know how to do this on a very practical level. How can loving like Jesus become more doable? That question became a personal quest. Love Like That is a result of what I’ve learned in my years of seeking a practical answer. I feel compelled to share it. Love Like That is my attempt to put the cookies on the bottom shelf and make it easier for Christ-followers to love family, friends, colleagues, and even strangers more and more like Jesus. 2. If you have to list three key takeaways from this book you would like for the reader to experience, what would they be?

The biggest takeaway is this: Loving like Jesus is more obtainable than you might imagine. I actually give readers five real life takeaways (one in each of my five chapters). If you want to love like Jesus, you’ve got to:

42 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

• become more mindful—less detached • become more approachable—less exclusive • become more grace-full—less judgmental • become more bold—less fearful • become more self-giving—less selfabsorbed Is this an exhaustive list of how Jesus loved? Of course not. It is a way to get an earthly handle on this heavenly ideal. Time and again, Jesus demonstrated these five qualities and spoke about them. These are doable. I dedicate a chapter to each one and show why it matters and how to do it in your everyday life. 3. Do you have a favorite passage or chapter in this book?

That’s easy. The title of the book comes from Ephesians 5:2 (MSG) where Paul says: “Observe how Christ loved us. His love was not cautious but extravagant. He didn’t love in order to get something from us but to give everything of himself to us. Love like that.” This is the hub of the wheel. If we don’t continually hone our ability to love like Jesus, we are missing the point—and missing out on everything our relationships were meant to be. So that’s my favorite Bible passage that I reference in the book. The first paragraph of the book is also among my most favorite. I get a lot of kind feedback on it, and it’s probably the most vulnerable writing I’ve ever done. I’ll leave it to you to see why.


We don’t do the loving alone. The H o ly S p i r i t — t h e F r i e n d , a s J e s u s said—helps us love others.

4. In what specific ways can this book equip, encourage, and/or instruct ministers?

A minister I deeply respect reviewed the manuscript early on. The first thing he said was, “This book is an ideal preaching series.” He and others encouraged me to create a church kit for this book with everything a minister needs to do a Love Like That church campaign: • Six complete sermon transcripts and outlines • Compelling screen graphics and bumpers • Promo video • Social media graphics and campaign plan • Small group curriculum with leader guide • Bible reading plan and devotional I’ve never done this with any of my other books, but this felt like a natural. My hope is that many ministers will use these tools to help the people in their care discover how doable it is to love more and more like Jesus. Pastors can learn more at LoveLikeThatBook.com. 5. If you were sitting beside the reader, what portion of the book do you feel you would want them to spend extra time on?

with the fact that we will never truly love like Jesus until we fall in step with the Spirit of Jesus to love others through us. In other words, we don’t do the loving alone, the Holy Spirit (the Friend, as Jesus said), helps us love others. This can seem mystical and abstract to many of us, but this is the keystone habit that empowers the other five other habits I have written about. When we fall in step with the Spirit, we don’t have to make nearly as many decisions to become more mindful, approachable, grace-full, bold, and self-giving. We become more attuned to the Spirit’s voice, and loving like Jesus becomes more and more of a daily habit.

LES PARROT T, PH.D. is a #1 New York Times bestselling author, psychologist, and ordained Nazarene minister. His books have sold more than five million copies in over 25 languages. He and his wife, Dr. Leslie Parrott, are also the founders of the highly acclaimed, online, marriage ministry tool, the SYMBIS Assessment (SYMBIS. com). Les and Leslie live in Seattle with their two sons. Learn more about Les’s new book, Love Like That, at LoveLikeThatbook.com.

To be honest, I would have to say the appendix of the book. After they spend time in five chapters that take a deep dive into the five practical ways to love more like Jesus, in the conclusion—and even more in the appendix—I help the reader come to terms

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 43


BOOK

REVIEW Love Like That: 5 Relationship Secrets from Jesus Dr. Les Parrott (Nashville, TN: Nelson Books, 2018), 240 pages. R E V I E W E R : DA N I E L L E A . J O N E S

T

his is a book for those who have felt like failures, for those who desperately want to follow Jesus and yet have fallen short of his selfless love. It is a book for those who keep pressing on, putting one foot in front of the other as they learn what it looks like to love like Jesus. Dr. Les Parrott, #1 New York Times bestselling author, has written a book in which he reveals five practical ways to love like Jesus in your day-to-day relationships: as a parent, spouse, friend, coworker, neighbor, and more. Parrot calls his five practices “secrets” because he believes most people, when thinking about loving like Jesus, only think of big sacrifices, and underestimate the small, ordinary ways in which we are called to practice the cruciform life. Parrott believes that loving like Jesus looks like these five practical habits: mindfulness, approachability, graciousness, boldness, and selflessness. Research has shown that truths make their way from our heads into our lives when we discuss them with others, contemplate them, reflect on them, and begin an intentional practice. Therefore, Parrott provides self-reflection quizzes and a number of discussion questions at the end of each chapter. Parrott’s book is simple, but convicting. In his chapter on being mindful, he challenges the reader to set aside his or her own agenda to really tune in to others. He states, “Even if your personal agenda seems holy and righteous, you may need to set it aside if you are to be loving” (p.17). In outlining the

44 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

practice of being approachable, he challenges readers to notice where they might be setting themselves above others in pride and provides ideas for practicing humility in daily interactions. Parrott’s chapter on grace addresses judgmental attitudes and the fallacy of salvation by works and then offers the reader practical ways to receive a life-altering grace from God in order to extend that same grace to others. When writing about boldness, Parrott dares readers to be kind to others by being clear with them and to be honest, courageous truth-tellers who are vulnerable and authentic in their relationships. In his chapter on self-giving, Parrott defines loving like Jesus as emptiness and self-denial. He urges readers to pick up the practice of empathy and insists through empirical data that when one lives for the other then one is truly happy as God is happy and holy as God is holy. He states, “When you imagine what life must be like in the other person’s skin, you change. Empathy shapes you. It fashions a heart that is more closely aligned with Jesus” (p. 148). Finally, Parrott makes clear that all of these practices are possible by the indwelling of the Holy Spirit and His power at work in a person’s life. He urges readers to daily make space to be breathed up into the loving life of the Triune God in order to breathe back out that love of God to others. Though Parrott is an ordained elder in the Church of the Nazarene, a licensed psychologist, researcher, and professor, this


is not written as a textbook for graduate students or a study guide for professionals in the helping field. His book is written in a you-took-your-pastor-to-coffee-and-askedwhat-it-looks-like-practically-to-follow-Jesus tone, yet he provides dozens of studies, research outcomes, neurological insights, scientific findings, and quotes from a myriad of sources. Parrott is scholarly, does his exegetical homework, and at the same time, he brings it all to where the “rubber meets the road” in his conversational tone and his delivery of specific and immediate ways to practice loving like Jesus. This book with its powerful but simple message would be a great resource to use in book studies, small groups, and teaching and discipleship circles.

DANIELLE A . JONES is an ordained elder who is passionate about the intersection of theology and ordinary life. She is a licensed family counselor with ten years of experience. Danielle has recently entered a new season in her calling where she is honored to practice in ordinary life all she knows about family counseling and theology—as a full-time stay-at-home mom to Shelby and Elise.

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 45


BOOK

REVIEW The Magnif icent Journey: Living Deep in the Kingdom James Bryan Smith (Intervarsity Press, 2018). 176 pages. RE VIEWER: STE VE JOHNSON

J

ames Bryan Smith has done a magnificent job of inviting us on a journey with God in his new book, The Magnificent Journey: Living Deep in the Kingdom. This book is part two in the “Magnificent” series, moving from “Story” to “Journey.” This invitation to live deep in the kingdom is offered compellingly by an author who uses inspiring stories from his own life as well as from some of the most important spiritual giants in the history of the Church. Smith’s Journey is an excellent resource that should be strongly considered for use by local congregations for a variety of purposes. Smith is professor of theology at Friends University in Wichita, Kansas, and the director of the Apprentice Institute for Christian Spiritual Formation. He is a founding member of Richard J. Foster’s Renovaré ministry, serves as teaching pastor at Chapel Hill United Methodist Church, and has written numerous books on spiritual formation and discipleship. Having a foot in both the world of academia as well as the local church, Smith has much to say to us about living as Christians in our everyday world. This book not only offers wise words about the Christlike life, it also provides useful features for group discipleship. Each chapter ends with a “Soul Training” exercise, which presents an invitation to meditate and journal on scripture and other ideas or quotes in each chapter. The study guide at the end of the book provides a helpful resource for small group leaders.

46 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

It seems as if Smith is building to the culminating disposition of joy throughout the book, but that intended design is not apparent until about halfway through the last chapter. If this march toward joy had been made clearer in an introduction, it would undoubtedly have strengthened the book as a whole. As it is, the reader is left with the feeling that something has been missed in the reading. However, the overall strength of the book far exceeds this minor design glitch. The two parts of the book, “Living Deep in the Kingdom” (Part One) and “Developing Kingdom Virtues” (Part Two) complement each other quite well. Part One is dedicated to preparation for kingdom life, accenting the need for surrender, clarifying the relationship and necessity of grace and knowledge, introducing a key image of living “from above,” and then challenging us to listen well to God. Using his gift for story (such as his beautiful illustration provided by “Science Mike”), complemented by a veritable hall of fame cast of spiritual mentors like Augustine, Ignatius, Luther, Calvin, Wesley, C.S. Lewis, and Dallas Willard, and a rich assortment of stories from Scripture, Smith prepares us for participation in the kingdom. In part two he shows us what life in the kingdom will look like and acquaints us with the cultural currency of our new habitus. Employing his skill at making the complex simple and the familiar seem brand new, Smith leads us to a deeper understanding of and desire for the virtues of faith, hope, love, and joy. In perhaps the most important paragraph in the


book, Smith summarizes with the message he has been moving toward throughout: “Joy begins when we enter the narrow way of Jesus, choosing to live as his apprentice, in continual surrender and reliance on Jesus. Joy continues when we grow in grace, live from above, and engage in an interactive conversation with God. Joy is also found in living by faith, hope, and love. These seven practices undergird joy, making joy possible” (131). He completes his summary in the next paragraph: “When we take the narrow way of surrender, putting God first, choosing to obey God’s will, we are right where our souls need to be to thrive. That makes growing in grace, living from above, and listening to God possible. Faith, hope, and love can then be exercised in this relationship. Joy then becomes not only possible but inevitable” (132). As I think about the people in my church, I consider our younger generation that so desperately needs an ethical foundation upon which to build. Smith’s treatment of the virtues, specifically the theological virtues of faith, hope, and love and our need to receive and nurture them by grace, is necessary bedrock for their discipleship. As I ponder the state of our more established Christians, I recognize our tendency to get stuck in traditional ways of thinking about sanctification and discipleship, and I recognize in Smith’s journey metaphor a necessary component to spiritual revitalization. In Magnificent Journey, Smith has provided us with a

valuable resource for training disciples. Every person in my church could profit from this excellent book, and I intend to make sure that they do as soon as possible.

STEVE JOHNSON is lead pastor of Nall Avenue Church of the Nazarene in Prairie Village, Kansas.

GRACEANDPEACEMAGAZINE.ORG / 47


I F J E S U S W E R E PA S T O R

A

perusal of news stories will quickly tell us that our clergy and laity live in challenging days. We need to be aware of the very real angst that Americans and Canadians are experiencing in these days. In the U.S. last year, there was a decline in average life expectancy for the first time in decades. There was an increase in suicide and drug overdoses. The statistic of 2.8 million deaths reported was an increase of almost 70,000 over the previous year. Dr. William Dietz, a disease prevention expert at George Washington University, said, “I really do believe that people are increasingly hopeless, and that leads to drug use and potentially to suicide.” The suicide rate is the highest it has been in 50 years. Even popular song lyrics reflect this hopelessness. USA Today (December 27, 2018 edition) reported that, according to a study done by Lawrence Technical in Michigan, popular song lyrics have gotten “angrier and sadder” over the last 60 years. If Jesus were serving as a pastor in the USA and Canada today, how would He deal with this? I believe He would do exactly what He did when He walked the earth two millennia ago: He would weep and pray over His people, and He would invite them into relationship. We see Jesus weeping over Jerusalem. We also see Him weeping over the loss of His dear friend Lazarus. The pain of both the city and of individuals broke His heart. Pastor, have you found yourself at the altar recently interceding for your people and your city? Effecting ministry in this culture begins at the altar, representing them to the Father. We see Jesus tenderly inviting people to walk with Him in relationship: “Come . . . Follow me,” He said. The way Jesus dealt with people was to live closely with them, so that

48 / GRACE & PEACE MAGAZINE SPRING 2019

over time they could discover that He truly was the Way, the Truth, and the Life. Pastor, have you found yourself being more isolated from people lately? Perhaps your own pain and disappointment have caused you to back away. Please, pastor, rush back to the altar and ask the Father to heal your own heart, so that you can share your heart with the people in the pews and the people outside your church doors. In response to this issue of Grace & Peace about relationships, an important question might be: How are your relationships? Pleased with the Prospects,

BOB BROADBOOKS

USA/Canada Regional Director


The

W

KEYS

to a Better

RETIREMENT

e all know retirement will be here someday, still we put it off. We’re young or we “can’t afford it right now” or we’re older and it feels like it’s too late to start. The keys to a good retirement are saving and time. The younger you are, the more time there is for your money to grow. But regardless of your age, beginning a regular, disciplined plan for saving and using the time available between now and the date you plan to use your funds can make the difference in having a comfortable retirement or having to work longer than you’d like. The Nazarene 403(b) Retirement Savings Plan through Fidelity Investments offers a tax-advantaged means for Nazarene church employees to invest for retirement, and the fee structure is very competitive. Money can be managed aggressively or placed in target-date funds that maintain an appropriate mix of investments depending on age and when you choose to retire. No amount is too small to invest in this plan. What’s important is saving something and doing it consistently over time. As you get older, perhaps you can increase the amount you contribute, and if your church employer adds to your savings, your funds will grow even faster. Find out more by visiting pbusa.org and selecting the Benefit Plans tab, followed by the Retirement tab. Or have a conversation with us at 888-888-4656 or pensions@nazarene.org.

Pensions and Benefits USA

Church of the Nazarene

A Century of Serving Those Who Serve 1919-2019

17001 Prairie Star Parkway – Lenexa, KS 66220 – 888-888-4656 – pensions@nazarene.org


NONPROFIT ORG US POSTAGE PAID PERMIT # 1461 KANSAS CITY, MO

USA/Canada Regional Office Church of the Nazarene 17001 Prairie Star Parkway Lenexa, KS 66220

J U LY 10 -1 4 , 2 0 19 # NY C1 9G O NYC201 9.C O M


Turn static files into dynamic content formats.

Create a flipbook
Issuu converts static files into: digital portfolios, online yearbooks, online catalogs, digital photo albums and more. Sign up and create your flipbook.