GRACE NOVEMBER 2013

GRACE ®

EDUCATION 2013 Vol. 16 No. 4

November 2013

Tina November 2013 JULY / AUGUST 2013

Birchett

— display until August 31, 2013 —

(1960 - 2013)

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We, the staff at GRACE速 Magazine and Sisterhood Showcase, are grateful to all those who extended their love and support to the Birchett and GRACE Magazine families during our time of grief. Your words, thoughts and actions touched us immensely. Though we continue to reel from the loss of our founder Tina, we stay committed to our mission of informing, inspiring and celebrating you - all women of color and their families.

We thank you for your loyalty and look forward to your continued support of GRACE速 Magazine and Sisterhood Showcase as we proceed in serving our readership and community.

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NOVEMBER 2013 | GRACE 1

T

Tina

ina Louise Davis Birchett was born April 26, 1960 to Sercy and Catherine Davis, in segregated Memphis. Catherine, Tina’s mom, had serious health issues and was unable to care for Tina.

However, Tina’s grandmother, “Mama Gertrude” was more than willing to help. Mama Gertrude, a spiritual mother in the Alpha Church, nurtured and raised Tina from birth through early childhood. Catherine returned to live with Tina and Mama Gertrude just as Tina was turning 13. Shortly thereafter, Mama Gertrude passed. Catherine was still in poor health, so teenaged Tina moved and lived with various relatives. Tina never forgot “moving from place to place.” This humble beginning and the floating foundation was always a subtle motivation for Tina’s drive!

And, driven Tina was! Tina’s get-up-and-go spirit first emerged when she attended Sheffield High School. Facing the challenge of a newly integrated school and the unwavering prejudices of the times, Tina decided to campaign for the title “Ms. Sheffield High.” She won the title, becoming the first African-American student to hold such an honor. After graduating from Sheffield High, Tina attended Memphis State University, where she majored in marketing. Upon graduation, she started a career with Holiday Inn, where she quickly began to distinguish herself. Tina campaigned for females and African-Americans to gain access to Holiday Inn stock purchases and upward mobility within the company. She was successful and more hints of her legacy as a trailblazer were starting to appear.

Tina got a different taste of marketing at WDIA, the first radio station in America that was programmed entirely by AfricanAmericans for African-Americans. There, Tina cut her teeth in entertainment production. Realizing her enjoyment from marketing entertainment, her love of people, and her independent spirit, Tina left WDIA and opened the doors of Birchett & Associates. From its inception, Birchett & Associates allowed Tina to do what she did best – inspire, connect, and innovate.

In 1995, Birchett & Associates launched its first Sisterhood Outreach Summit & Showcase (“Sisterhood Showcase”). Her mission was to connect women of color mentally, spiritually and physically. The format was designed to showcase AfricanAmerican businesses; highlight the accomplishments of Black

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America; empower the region’s African-American women; and, uplift the future through informative panels and clinics. The Showcase continues to draw over 30,000 attendees each year and impacts Memphis tremendously through increased tourism and as an economic boost to Memphis! The 18th Anniversary of the Sisterhood Showcase was observed this past June at the Memphis Cook Convention Center.

After two years of success with the Showcase, in 1997, Birchett & Associates launched its first issue of GRACE® Magazine dedicated to the lifestyles and interests of Memphis women of color. GRACE® Magazine, now in its second decade, is a bi-monthly publication for women of color with a readership of over 60,000.

Through GRACE® Magazine and Sisterhood Showcase, Tina was able to make significant contributions to the women of color in Memphis and surrounding communities, touching their lives with her message of courage and faith. In 1997, she was one of the 30 pioneers who founded the Memphis Chapter of the National Association of Women Business Owners (NAWBO). She was a member of the 1999 class of Leadership Memphis and a proud member of Alpha Kappa Alpha sorority. She faithfully attended Mississippi Boulevard Christian Church.

Unsurprisingly, she received numerous awards and honors. They include the Memphis & Shelby County Health Department’s Light of Hope Award (2004); Memphis Magazine’s Who’s Who in Memphis (2004); Black Business Associations’ Outstanding Business of the Year Award (2006); The Tri-State Defender’s Women of Excellence (2009); and YWCA of Greater Memphis Distinguished Community Leadership Award (2011).

Of her many accomplishments, Tina was most proud of her children, Christina and Timothy. She was a strong, doting mother who sought “only the best for her crew!” It was her strong desire for her daughter, Christina, to build upon her legacy.

Tina was strong, tenacious and always pushing ahead. She championed mid-south women of color and their families. She sought higher grounds for the embattled and the downtrodden. She blazed trails – and did it with style and charm. Her endless faith carried her through two battles of cancer and her effervescent laugh carried all those who had the pleasure and honor of knowing her.

--- Tina is missed!

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Family Salute to

Tina Birchett T

ina cherished her family more than life itself. Each year, she went way “out of the box” with Christina and Timothy’s Birthday Parties. She presented Christina to society in the 2004 Memphis Links Cotillion and celebrations were a big part of their family traditions – from formal attire Thanksgiving and the Family Reunion to celebrating the 10th Anniversary of GRACE® Magazine.

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Early

YEARS

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ina’s charisma and style blossomed at an early age – beginning with her patent handbag and continued in her dinner pearls. Her love of family, pride in accomplishments and glowing smile voiced her determination at an early age.

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Innovator COMMUNITY

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s Tina began her career at WDIA, her busy desk says it all! She was a quiet among a storm. Then, with a thundering roar, she launched upon Memphis the 1995 Inaugural Sisterhood Showcase with a grand kick-off celebration. Tina continued kick-off celebrations for many years. From the beginning, Tina’s selected logo, the “Diva” symbolized and defined Sisterhood – strong, proud, beautiful black woman!

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Dynamic T

WOMAN

hey say lightning only strikes once – well, Tina’s didn’t stop striking with the successful Sisterhood Showcase …. within two years, Tina presented Memphis with the Inaugural Issue of GRACE® Magazine followed with a GRACE® Magazine Publisher’s Luncheon at Sisterhood Showcase.

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Phenomenal T

WOMAN

ina loved meeting new people and sharing her Showcase experience. Some of her favorite celebs were Lailah Ali, Joe, Oprah Winfrey, Stedman Graham, Susan Taylor, Vice President Al Gore, President Barack Obama and Morgan Freeman.

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CHRISTINA STEVISON We began this issue by paying tribute to our founder, my mother, Tina L. Birchett, a true visionary.

My family and I would like to thank you for your support during this time. We lost a valuable jewel and a community leader and the world has lost an amazing human. Tina leaves behind a legacy that only she could have built and her spirit will forever be the foundation for all we do going forward. Her purpose was to inspire all of us to do more with our gifts for ourselves and for others.

Write To Us:

Email speakout@gracemagazine.com or send us a letter to P.O. Box 3180 Memphis, TN 38173

PUBLISHER’SLETTER

AS TOLD BY

We hope you enjoy this issue and we look forward to carrying on her legacy. We will honor her memory by dedicating ourselves to continuing the work she loved so much.

In Sisterhood,

Christina

NOVEMBER 2013 | GRACE 13

Contributors

foot building into The H.O.P.E. Zone (Haven of Perfective Empowerment) dedicated to Christian education, senior living, and ministry services for the people of God and the community at large.

His inspiration continues to empower the church in action and optimum service to the community through GREATER WORKS, Inc. which he founded and is principal officer.

KEITH NORMAN is the Pastor of First Baptist

Church-Broad, located in the Binghampton community of Memphis, Tennessee. Pastor Norman’s ministry, dedicated to serving a predominantly African-American community, has been instrumental in the revitalization and strategic planning for future generations of First Baptist Church-Broad and the Binghampton community. Under his leadership, First Baptist Church-Broad has tremendously enhanced its presence in Memphis; grown its congregation; expanded its Family/Life Worship Facility; and, constructed a glorious Sanctuary and Chapel. Pastor Norman’s vision-inspired ministry transformed an abandoned 50,000-square

Pastor Norman tirelessly spreads his message of optimal empowerment through his numerous speaking engagements across the United States and abroad. Serving as Co-Chairman of the Board of Directors of the Shelby County Health Care Corporation (THE MED) and as a Tennessee Bureau of Ethics and Campaign Finance Commissioner, Pastor Norman is consistently a strong leader and voice of metropolitan Memphis.

Presently, he serves as President of the Memphis NAACP; NAACP Religious Affairs Chairman - TN State Conference, and, is a member of the NAACP Special Contribution Fund Board of Trustees. Pastor Norman is the 2012 recipient of President Obama’s “Champion of Change” award and Christian Brother University’s Bishop Carroll T. Dozier Peace and Justice Award. Recently, Pastor Norman was appointed to the Board of Trustees at Christian Brothers University.

Pastor Norman is a native Memphian, son of Zella Cathey, husband of Alicia Yvette White Norman, and father of four – Keith, KeAsia, Keenan, and Kiara.

First Baptist Church-Broad 2835 Broad Avenue Memphis, TN 38112 901.323.2429

MICHAEL L. HARRIS, ESQ. is a Memphis

trial lawyer specializing in wrongful foreclosure, real estate litigation, bankruptcy, and asset protection. Attorney Harris is known for his ability to find creative solutions to complex legal issues helping clients recover substantial money damages from wrongful foreclosure actions. He also has had much success securing the removal of void and unenforceable judgment liens against residential and commercial real estate.

Attorney Harris is a member of the Memphis Bar Association, Tennessee Bar Association, Memphis Urban League, Nexus Leadership Academy and Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity. Attorney Harris is a member of the Shelby County Tennessee Youth Court Initiative Counsel where he serves as Youth Court Judge or Adolescent Mentor. Harris classifies his law practice simply as . . . “All things housing.”

Michael L. Harris, Esq. Harris Law Firm, PLLC 901.500.3337

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GRACE® Founder TINA L. BIRCHETT (1960 – 2013) Publisher & CEO CHRISTINA N. STEVISON Editor In Chief TONI HARVEY Executive Editor LISA LEW Art Director DETRIC STANCIEL Production/Circulation Director CHRIS BOYD Contributing Writers MICHAEL L. HARRIS, ESQ. B. HENDERSON ANN LEUNG PASTOR KEITH NORMAN Contributing Photographers TYRONE EASLEY CLARENCE M. NEAL DETRIC STANCIEL

HOW TO REACH US STEVISON GROUP, LLC 200 JEFFERSON AVENUE SUITE 1066 MEMPHIS, TN 38103 PHONE 901.579.9333 FAX 901.795.2256

GRACE® Magazine is a bi-monthly publication of Stevison Group, LLC and is distributed in locations throughout the Memphis/MidSouth area. Subscriptions are available for $21.95 (six issues).

Readership: 60,000 @2013 by Stevison Group, LLC. All rights reserved. The publisher assumes no responsibility for unsolicited materials and does not return unsolicited materials to sender.

Photography and images obtained for editorial usage is owned

by GRACE® Magazine and may not be released for commercial use such as in advertisements. Reproduction in whole or in part without the publisher’s consent is strictly prohibited. The opinions expressed herein are exclusively those of the writers and do not necessarily reflect the positions or views of the editor or publisher. The publication of any advertisement in this issue does not constitute an endorsement of the advertiser’s products or services by this publication.

GRACE November 2013 | NO.1 | www.gracemagazine.com

FEATURES 17 TRAVEL

ARE YOU TAKING A ROAD-TRIP THIS HOLIDAY? Over the river and through the woods… yes, it’s that time of year and according to AAA there will be 93.3 million Americans traveling 50 miles or more from home during the year-end holidays.

21 HEALTH AND BEAUTY Goodbye Dryness!

HELLO WINTER!

22 FOOD

TINA’S TASTY PICKS Tina loved to eat her top Picks: Onix, Alcenia’s and Arnold’s

25 FINANCE

PERSONAL FINANCIAL WELLNESS Regardless of where you are with your personal finance -- age or income doesn’t matter; you can take steps to ensure control of your financial future.

GLAM GUTS & GRACE FASHION

26 ON THE COVER Tina L. Birchett, Founder, Publisher of GRACE® Magazine. Ms. Birchett transitioned this life on August 18, 2013

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FINANCE

The Day After Tomorrow FINANCING IS POSSIBLE AFTER FORECLOSURE

I

By MICHAEL L. HARRIS, ESQ.

magine yourself in the movie “The Day After Tomorrow,” the world was spun into survival mode after a massive climate shift. Scary – like foreclosure?

In the movie, people gathered their wits; pulled together; weathered the storm; and lived to see another day. Though foreclosure certainly is not the end of the world, it feels like it!

You can see the day after tomorrow; you can survive foreclosure and financing is possible after foreclosure.

This article is not intended to scare, but to educate. Foreclosures are not something new to housing market, but since the down-turn of the economy, foreclosures are more prevalent. Lenders toss the word foreclosure around when borrowers default on their mortgage loan. In general, “default” occurs when a borrower gets 90-120 days past due on their mortgage. Once default occurs, lenders can accelerate payment on the loan and require the borrower to pay the loan in full. The foreclosure process can unfold quickly for cash-strapped homeowners and the road back to homeownership can be long, slow, and hard.

This is especially true in places affected by predatory lending, unpredictable economic down shifts, mass layoffs, and plummeting property values.

The latest data from the 2012 RealtyTrac US Foreclosure Market Report states, “Shelby County, with one filing for every 308 households, had the highest foreclosure rate in the state. Shelby County was also the county with the highest number of properties with foreclosure filings in the state, with 1,293 properties.” These statistics tell a power16 NOVEMBER 2013 | GRACE

ful story that is for many painful, but there is hope.

The Federal Housing Administration (FHA) has added a new criterion to its “extenuating circumstances” policy, making it easier for homeowners to get approved for FHA backed loans only one (1) year after losing a home in foreclosure. At first, the death of a spouse and medical emergencies were the key extenuating circumstances for which the waiting period could be reduced to one (1) year. The list has now been expanded to include “loss of income,” but only for a limited period of three (3) years.

Under normal conditions, borrowers seeking approval for an FHA backed loan must wait at least two years after filing bankruptcy or three defaulting on a mortgage. However, borrowers meeting the extenuating circumstances policy can be approved for an FHA backed loan after only one year. Eligible borrowers must provide proof their foreclosure or bankruptcy was caused by outside economic factors which caused an income reduction of 20% or more for at least six months. Borrowers affected by longterm furloughs, layoffs, pay reductions, declining business sales, or other similar factors may be able to walk right back into a new home. The policy does not consider resignation, or termination acceptable extenuating circumstances.

Borrowers may also be required to maintain a positive payment history during the transitional period between foreclosure and the new loan application and/or obtain housing counseling from an agency approved by the Department of Housing and Urban Development.

If you are experiencing foreclosure, here are steps you should consider taking: • DO NOT wait until the lender contacts you • Contact the lender to seek loan modification • Take action BEFORE you reach foreclosure status • Gather all your mortgage documents and payment documents • Gather all documents regarding your financial hardship (such as employment termination papers, health records, declining business sales) • Contact the lender to determine all available options • Consult an attorney to determine possible remedies Foreclosure is not an experience for the faint of heart, nor is resilience a character trait of the fearful. Foreclosure is not a second ice age, and with a little research and resilience, those facing foreclosure can live to see “the day after tomorrow.” G

TRAVEL

Are You Taking a Road-Trip

THIS HOLIDAY?

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By Ann Leung

ver the river and through the woods… yes, it’s that time of year and according to AAA there will be 93.3 million Americans traveling 50 miles or more from home during the year-end holidays. This year 90% will travel by automobile -- that’s 26.7% of the U.S. population – navigating the roads. So if you plan on hitting the road whether it’s to Grandma’s or for a weekend getaway, check out these apps to help make the drive easier. You’ll find apps to help you get to your destination and while en route, to locate the nearest gas stations, eateries and last-minute hotel rooms. They’ll also guide you around traffic jams, direct you toward scenic views or points of interest, and even personalize your own music station. Best of all they’re free. So bring your car chargers and your smartphones, buckle up and enjoy the ride!

GAS BUDDY

ROADTRIPPERS

(Available on iOS, Android) Gas Buddy finds the lowest fuel price for different grades of gasoline and diesel near your location. You can also search by city, state or ZIP code. If you’re in an unfamiliar area, Gas Buddy will point you in the direction of the cheapest gas or just point you away from a station with higher-than-average prices. Gas Buddy users submit prices as they visit or drive by stations so price updates are real-time.

FIELD TRIP

PANDORA

(Available on iOS) If you have the time, RoadTrippers locates both the more obscure and off-beat points of interest as well as the better known tourist attractions. You’ll find maps and driving directions to help you navigate around or within an area. The app draws from a database of 75,000+ places and includes guides and recommendations from local experts. You also can use the app to find restaurants, hotels, and shopping.

(Available on iOS and Android) Unlike RoadTrippers, this app runs in the background on your smartphone and as you near an attraction of interest information appears automatically. You’ll learn about everything from local history to the latest and best places for shopping, eating, and entertainment. Field Trip works while in or out of your car so you can get directions to attractions by driving, walking or public transportation.

(Available on iOS, Android) You probably already use Pandora at home, but on the road this app really sings -- literally. Just share a list of your favorite songs or artists with the app and it will create a personalized radio station that plays only the music you love. Based on your selections it will even introduce to new songs.

WAZE

(Available on iOS and Android) Waze is an app that that helps with navigation and pulls both from its database and drivers’ input to guide and even redirect your trip.

It provides real-time alerts on traffic snarls, speed traps, road hazards, stalled vehicles, and even weather warnings. You might get miss-directed occasionally, but the beauty of WAZE is that its users give feedback and rerouting – so no stopping and getting out of the car.

HOTELS.COM

(Available on iOS, Android) Hotels.com is a great traveler’s app with a wide choice of properties. It’s very easy to use because it shows only hotels near you and those that have availability for that night. It provides ratings by former guests, and a “call” option so you can speak directly to a person at Hotels.com to assist you with your reservation.

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Countdown to Baptist OneCare Launch: OVERVIEW OF LARGEST PROJECT IN BAPTIST HISTORY

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By KIMBERLY ALEXANDER

n the past 100 years, Baptist Memorial Health Care has tackled many large construction projects. These projects have resulted in new hospitals, new bed towers or new emergency rooms. But Baptist’s latest project involves construction of a different kind.

“We’re investing heavily in one of the largest projects in the 101-year history of Baptist to improve care, and we’re doing it by getting all these tools assimilated into the electronic health record,” said Beverly Jordan, vice president and chief clinical transformation officer for Baptist Memorial Health Care.

Baptist is building an electronic health record system—called Baptist OneCare— that will connect all Baptist hospitals, clinicians and patients while optimizing patient care and the patient experience. Baptist selected Epic Systems to provide the database for Baptist OneCare.

“This system basically has one patient record so you have a singular database that has a unique record for each patient, and it maintains that record across physician practices, hospitals, clinics or any department that you go in,” said Tim Donaldson, director of the Epic technical team. “Now we have one longitudinal record that spans across applications and even facilities.”

That makes the Epic system different from so many other systems and uniquely qualified to meet the needs of a large health care system, such as Baptist.

“Epic has been winning best in KLAS awards for several years,” said Dr. Jack Brown, chief medical information officer for Baptist. (KLAS is an independent company that measures vendor performance to help hospitals make informed decisions.)

“We had demonstrations of both Epic and a competitor. In the end we had well over a thousand people respond to a survey … and the overwhelming winner was Epic by far.”

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Baptist involved the staff and physicians who will use the system in the vetting and selection process.

“Ninety-plus percent of the hospital staff are going to use it, touch it in some form or fashion, but the medical staff are going to be key to successful electronic health record implementation and then the sustainment piece,” said Derick Ziegler, CEO and administrator for Baptist Memorial Hospital-Memphis. “It was exciting to engage them early on in the evaluation process and to get their vote of approval and endorsement has been huge … this is a herculean project … when you’re talking something that big, that large you’ve got to make sure that your physicians are on board, and I think we did right, absolutely, by engaging them in the evaluation process.”

Despite the learning curve and adjustment that will accompany implementation of this new system, medical staff involved in the selection process support the transition to Epic.

“I think physicians are going to be very, very happy with this system,” said Dr. Thomas Greenwell, OB-GYN and managing partner for Mid-South OB/GYN. “There’s going to be some learning curve as with everything … I applaud the people at Baptist in having foresight to take this bold of a step.”

Physician and clinical staff involvement with Baptist OneCare does not end with the selection of Epic. An extensive training process is commencing and will continue until the successful implementation of Baptist OneCare in 2015. In the end, the selection, development and execution of Baptist OneCare will have involved hundreds of systems, tens of thousands of people, hundreds of thousands of hours in training and millions of dollars, but the investment will be well worth the effort.

“Health care is complex,” said Jordan. “We’re trying to bring in the best tools to Baptist to get better with the care that we provide by using these tools … and then everybody wins.” G

The best waiting room is your living room. download the free Baptist Minor Med rest & relax at home app for your iphone, ipod or ipad. then the next time you need us, use the app to pre-register and relax until we call you. no iphone? no problem — just call the nearest clinic and pre-register by phone.

Baptist Minor Meds. a better option for your family’s urgent care needs. open 7 days a week, 8 am – 7:30 pm.

Cordova | MeMphis | olive BranCh | Bartlett minormed.baptistonline.org

Get Better.

OCTOBER 2013 | GRACE 19

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HEALTH AND BEAUTY

Hello Winter!

GOODBYE DRYNESS!

W

e welcome winter and all the wonderful things that come with it – Christmas, family gatherings, holiday sales, and snow – to name a few! The one thing we don’t welcome is dry, cracked skin. As temperatures drop, it’s important to adjust your skin care regime to fight off the effects of biting winds, drying indoor heat and dehydrating long hot showers. Here are a few tips to protect and nourish your skin from scalp to sole: STEP AWAY FROM THE GREASE! The obvious choice to combat a dry, flaky scalp would be to moisturize it. Steer clear of the “old school” jar of grease and opt for a light oil instead.

Grease simply sits on top of your scalp. It can clog pores, making matters worse. Try using jojoba, argan, or my personal favorite, coconut oil. Use an applicator bottle to apply the oil lightly throughout your scalp and use the pads of your fingers to massage it in. Reapply as needed throughout the week.

Not only will the health of your scalp improve, your hair will have a nice sheen without a greasy feel.

ADD THREE LETTERS TO YOUR SHOPPING LIST - SPF There is a common misconception that women with darker complexions do not need protection from the sun. False! Women with darker skin tones do not sunburn as easily as those with fairer skin colors because of the presence of more epidermal melanin, which provides a natural sun protection. However, we are still susceptible to sun spots, wrinkles and skin cancer without an additional “SPF” or “sun protection factor” aide. Sunscreens are available at highend beauty counters and more affordable supermarkets and drug stores. Experts suggest using products with an SPF of at least 15.

TURN DOWN THE HEAT! Even if it’s freezing outside, resist the urge to take steaming showers. Opt for a relaxing warm shower

instead. The heat from the water can strip your body of natural oils. Similarly, turn down your home thermostat to the lowest setting that keeps you comfortable, not bone dry! Dry heat robs your skin and your hair of valuable moisture. Not only will your skin and hair condition improve, your energy bill savings will increase!

MOISTURIZE FROM HEAD TO TOE Many of us take great care of our faces, but pay less attention to our skin from the neck down. It’s particularly easy to neglect the areas that stay covered in winter, like knees, elbows, and feet. Treat your body to a daily dose of an oil-based lotion. The oil will work as a protective layer to the skin and seal in natural oils produced by your body. Your skin will feel wonderful and have a beautiful glow as you smile and say, “Hello, winter!” G NOVEMBER 2013 | GRACE 21

FOOD

Tina’s

TASTY

PICKS TINA LOVED TO EAT HER TOP PICKS: ONIX, ALCENIA’S AND ARNOLD’S

Alcenia’s SOUTHERN STYLE CUISINE The only thing Tina liked more than the personal greetings you get at Alcenia’s was Alcenia’s flavorful catfish, mac/cheese, yams, cabbage and ghetto-aid!

Onix Restaurant Arnold’s Bar-B-Q Her favorite meals were their tilapia and hot wings.

www.onixrestaurant.com

If you didn’t see Tina at Alcenia’s – you could possibly have found her at Onix – she was sure to be eating tilapia and hot wings!

If Tina wanted beef ribs, she sought out Arnolds for the best in town! And, she always got added beans --- But, her meal was not complete – without the banana pudding!

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methodist

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DATING

ClickonLove INTERNET DATING FOR BEGINNERS

A

t one point, I viewed online dating like a virtual meat market. I’d never tried the sites myself and winced at the thought of having to tell my future children “I remember the first time I clicked on your dad’s profile just like it was yesterday.”

I questioned the ability to spark romance while sifting through a number of stranger’s profiles. I had friends who had found love online, but I just was not sold. In my head, finding love would play out like the movie “Pretty Woman” (minus the prostitution part!). A gorgeous, intelligent bachelor pursues me over several months after a chance meeting and shows up at my door step with white roses ready to whisk me off into the sunset to live happily ever after. Then one day reality set in. While I was waiting to bump into Prince Charming, I realized all of my friends were getting married and having babies.

One Friday night when I was home alone (again!), my phone conversation with a friend went something like “I’m tired of being single blah blah blah we should try match blah blah okay you do it first.” So I did. Within ten minutes, I had five winks and one inbox message. The next day I couldn’t concentrate at work because my profile was blowing up! This was my dating watershed moment. I became a full-fledged internet dater.

While I’m still single, I’ve met quite a few great guys online. They weren’t my Prince Charmings, but they most certainly will be for someone. Three of my friends took the plunge after me and created 24 NOVEMBER 2013 | GRACE

profiles on various dating sites. We all realized that online dating took quite a bit of work to navigate and is just as intimidating, if not more, as dating offline. However, if you are willing to “click on love,” the internet is full of wonderful men.

Here are three big tips for success with online dating: Don’t embellish!

It’s tempting to “spruce up” your profile with a few embellishments. While you can say “hello” in French and Spanish, that does not make you “fluent” or “multilingual!” This is the time to be truthful. It’ll save you time and embarrassment when your date introduces you to his mother in French.

Don’t obsess over pictures – yours or his.

Let’s be honest. Looks matter.

But just like you bear little resemblance to the photo you paid to have “created” with hair, makeup, and artful lighting, chances are, he doesn’t either. Use a profile photo that looks the way you look most of the time. In case he didn’t, see if you like the “general look” of the photo. That way you’re not disappointed when Superman shows up looking like Clark Kent.

Fall for the guy, not the profile.

Use the dating profile simply as a screening device. It will take the “chance” out of meeting your prince, but nothing takes the place of old-fashioned chemistry. Once you click and connect, throw the profile out of your head and focus on the real man. If he is your dream mate, you will know – and so will he. Happy Clicking! G

FINANCIAL

Personal Financial Wellness

By Ann Leung

R

egardless of where you are with your personal finance -- age or income doesn’t matter; you can take steps to ensure control of your financial future. Here are a few tips to jump start and help you along the way.

KNOW WHERE YOU ARE GOING Clearly define and set realistic goals. When determining goals, remember “If you don’t know where you are going, any road will take you there.” So, whether it’s saving for retirement, purchasing a new home, climbing out of debt or saving for children’s education, let’s know where we want to go.

TRACK YOUR SPENDING A common mistake is not knowing where the money has gone. You need to understand where your money is going in order to take control of it. Tracking your spending is the foundation for building a plan.

TO DO: Grab a pen and pad -- enter all your daily expenses. For many, “cashonly” is a better choice, simply use envelopes labeled with your monthly expense categories and stuff specific allotted amounts of cash in envelope. For the tech savvy, Mint.com offers expense tracking software to easily and electronically organize your accounts and analyzing spending automatically.

DEVISE A BUDGET Once you know where and how much you spend, you need to develop a budget and stick to it. For many, budgeting is viewed as a necessary evil. As harsh as it may sound, budgeting allows you to plan in advance how to spend your money, so you are able to optimize your dollars to pay down debt and save towards your goals.

TO DO: Set up a budget. Simply record your take-home pay (net income) and allocate the following categories.

• 65% Essential Expenses (housing, transportation, utilities and groceries) • 20% Financial Priorities- includes retirement, savings and debt (in that order) • 15% Life Style Choices (may include gifts, travel, dining out, miscellaneous) The breakdown of these percentages is just a rule of thumb; you need to determine what works for you. Keep in mind you first must prioritize essential expenses, and second, determine your financial obligations - both of these categories are considered necessary or needs. Finally, whatever percentage remains becomes your Life Style Choice or your wants category. If you are to cut back on spending or to increase your savings, this category is where it will take place. G Look for additional tips in our next issue of GRACE® Magazine.

NOVEMBER 2013 | GRACE 25

FASHION

GUTS

GLAM

GRACE

THREE IMPORTANT WORDS FOR TODAY’S STYLISH WOMAN

By B. Henderson

“Guts. Glam. Grace.” were Tina Birchett’s favorite words. They summed up her hopes for the readers of GRACE®, as well as her own personal goals. These three important words also capture the essence of today’s stylish woman. Whether you are going to the supermarket, a family barbeque, or a night out on the town, put your best self forward by embracing these powerful words!

GUTS! The gutsy woman gets ahead in life because she’s willing to take chances. The stylish woman stands out from the crowd for the same reason. Set yourself apart from others by adopting bold fashion accents! Put on a pair of brightly colored shoes or boots, like fuschia or cobalt blue, to electrify a neutral colored dress or pant suit.

The heel height doesn’t matter as long as the color is bold.

If bags interest you more, consider an outrageous colored snakeskin, real or faux, large or small. Many retailers are carrying them this season. Are you a hat lady?

Then go for the bedazzled baseball cap or the leopard print fedora cocked to the side. The gutsy woman is confident and dresses the part.

GLAM! The glamorous woman reminds us of the beauty and power of being a woman. She is proud of her feminine gifts and dresses to highlight them. She has a standing hair appointment and wouldn’t be caught dead without a manicure. Her makeup is done to perfection, whether it’s the natural look or “fully loaded.” She normally has on heels and her motto is “The higher, the better.”

26 NOVEMBER 2013 | GRACE

While you may not go “full glam” all the time, consider having your make-up done by a professional for a special event. Most beauty lines in large retail stores offer free make-overs. At the very least, purchase one tube of fabulous red lipstick, cateye sunglasses, and a body-flattering dress. Throw on some heels and think, “I am woman, hear me roar!!!!” The glam woman is grateful God made her a woman and shows it.

GRACE! The graceful woman is elegant in her thoughts, words, and deeds. She knows the best thing she can wear is a smile, good manners, and a positive attitude. Even in jeans and sneakers at a company picnic, she shines in a crowd from her inner beauty. She is neat, clean, and considerate of those around her. Show your graceful side by dressing appropriately for every occasion.

If you’re attending a wedding, remember that it’s the bride’s day. This may not be the time for the zebra print, micro-mini dress! If you’re going to Parents’ Night at your child’s school, nix the deep-plunging halter and 6” heels. When in doubt, opt for more conservative clothing and let your personality shine. The graceful woman knows the power of her inner beauty and wears it well.

Stylish women embrace Guts, Glamour, and Grace – often at the same time! The most stylish women, however, always dress with GRACE. G

OCTOBER 2013 | GRACE 27

BRIDES

Graceful

BRIDES

2

1

3

4

5

1. Sammy Batts Jr. and Nikki Donahue, Golden Gate Cathedral 2. Geremy Moore and Candace Nichols, Bridges 3. Branden Williams and Monique Rogers, Hills Chapel 4. Steven Maben and Constance Brewster, Friendship M.B.Church 5. Bradley Coleman and Genise Warren 6. Chris Miller and Kristen Beck, Mphs. Intenl. Airport Conf. Center 28 NOVEMBER 2013 | GRACE

BRIDES

6

GRACEFUL 7

9 8

BRIDES

7. Cedric Wade and Ashley Gammon, Prince of Peace Bapt 8. Darrell Alexander and Rachel Cody, Botanical Garden 9. Sampson Allen Sr. and Barbara Campbell, Marriott American Way

NOVEMBER 2013 | GRACE 29

A Manifestation of

I

My Friend Tina!

am convinced that God does not extend to creation the Gift of His Amazing Grace for us to be mere Average Creations! We are meant to be MORE than Conquerors through Him who loved us and died to save us!

Nobody understood and believed this more than my friend Tina B! Finding destiny and her place under the sun to be more than an average creation was a life long quest and she fulfilled it right up until the very last moment of life within her control.

As author Jim Collins reminds us Good is the enemy of Great, I remind the members of First Baptist Church Broad that Average is the Adversary of Amazing, and we were created by an Awesome God to do Amazing Things! Tina was simply Amazing, and yet she was always seeking to raise the bar even higher. Tina seemed to dream in color and think in volumes.

Her passion for life was never limited by circumstances and her vision for service and success was not to be hindered by any obstacle.

Amazing by definition alone describes Tina. Startling, breathtaking, stunning and stupefying!

This was Tina in HIGH DEFINITION! When coupled with Grace, (simple and elegant or of the spiritual kind, unmerited favor from God) Tina was simply the perfect embodiment of both!

Tina had the wonderful ability to look beyond obvious obstacles and see new opportunities.

She challenged the people around her to think in broad, bold and new ways. I am grateful to have known her in this way. She would say to me… “Keith….I see…. And you can do it!” as a matter of fact she would say…”you’re probably the only one who can do it!” And for some reason her bold belief and confidence would cause you and others to believe too!

I am going to miss Tina. It still hard for me to believe that she is no longer with us in presence, although there is absolutely no way for the memory of her spirit to ever leave us! I am going to miss her infectious laughter, her ingenuity, the way she challenged everyone around her, and her desire to be all that she was put on earth to be …An Manifestation of God’s Amazing Grace!

Keith Norman NOVEMBER 2013 | GRACE 31

December 2013 Holiday Issue Sneak Peek!

What’s coming up in December’s issue In our next issue, look for holiday planning ideas, winter glamour tips, and shopping guides to help you make this upcoming holiday season your best one!

Holidays often bring wedding bells — Look for wedding tips to guide you through your needs for your big day.

We want to hear back from you! Submit reader comments, let us know about topics you would like to see us cover or drop us a line to say hello to speakout@gracemagazine.com.

We are looking to feature one amazing Mid-South woman each issue in our “You Go Girl!” department. If you would like to nominate our amazing woman, submit a brief overview of the person, why she is amazing and how she impacts others. Forward submissions to: yougogirl@gracemagazine. com.

Did you or another fabulous woman recently marry? Share your day with us and your wedding could be a part of our Graceful Brides feature. Write us at relationships@gracemagazine.com and tell us a little bit about you and your groom, how you met and how you got engaged. Be sure to include two photos from your wedding in the email and tell us the best way to contact you. Good luck! We can’t wait to hear from you!

32 NOVEMBER 2013 | GRACE

Detric GRAPHIC DESIGN | WEB DESIGN | PHOTOGRAPHY

www.nine23designs.com | 662.392.0695 | dstanciel@nine23designs.com OCTOBER 2013 | GRACE 33

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When it comes to

PATIENT SAFETY,

blue cross We’re all on the

SAME TEAM.

That’s why the Tennessee Hospital Association and BlueCross BlueShield of Tennessee teamed up to create the Tennessee Center for Patient Safety. This program provides ongoing training and support to eliminate infections and help keep patients across the state healthy and safe.

So everyone who provides care can provide it better. BlueCross BlueShield of Tennessee is for Tennessee. See how BlueCross is impacting your community at bcbst.com/impact A not-for-profit, Tennessee-based company.

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