Grand Cities Woman Volume 1, Issue 4

Volume 1, Issue 4 September | October 2012 Complimentary

Miles of Heroes Grand Forks Arthritis Walk Honorees Shelli Kasprick and Tori Byklum

Dear Reader,

I recently had the honor of delivering a commencement address to the 2012 graduating class of Lake Region State College. Initially, I conceptualized an inspiring speech while mowing my lawn because that is where I do my best thinking. Unfortunately, I didn’t have a pen and paper while on the lawn mower, so the graduates didn’t get to hear that speech. There is nothing like having to prepare a speech that compels you to reflect on your life and experiences. While reflecting on those experiences, I realized that my mentors played a large part in my career, life, and decisions that I have made. Therefore, I thought it fitting to deliver a speech that promoted the benefits of having a mentor and becoming a mentor.

Most of us forget that the second we wake up in the morning, we influence others with our actions and discourse—this is being a mentor. Realizing the influence that we have on others can help us notice the value that we have in our community and focus on providing a positive impact on those around us.

Successful adults tend to lack sufficient time in their busy schedule to become a mentor to a young child. Most of us are guilty of letting our schedules take over our lives, putting stress on our relationships. But, if you can manage to spare at least one hour a week each month, I strongly urge you to consider becoming a mentor. Mentored children can develop a stronger, more stable life for themselves and make better choices. Ultimately, guiding a young child through difficult times—or even just being there to listen—not only benefits the child, but the mentor and community.

Autumn Graber, Editor

Volume 1, Issue 4 September | October 2012 Complimentary

Publisher Information PUBLISHER Graber Media, LLC MANAGING EDITOR/AD SALES Autumn Graber, (701) 261-2692 CHIEF FINANCIAL OFFICER Kelly Graber, (701) 740-3848 ADVERTISING SALES Mary Glessner, (701) 330-3150 COPY EDITOR MariLou Harveland DESIGN/LAYOUT Autumn Graber Mail correspondence to: GRAND CITIES WOMAN PO BOX 5503 GRAND FORKS, ND 58206 Connect with us! grandcitieswoman@live.com www.grandcitieswoman.com www.facebook.com/grandcitieswoman

Messages sent to us by email or Facebook might be used in future issues of Grand Cities Woman.

Printed in North Dakota. © 2012 Graber Media, LLC. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced without written permission from the publisher. Grand Cities Woman Magazine assumes no responsibility for unsolicited manuscripts or photographs. Grand Cities Woman Magazine does not necessarily endorse or agree with content of articles or advertising presented.

This magazine is printed on an environmentally certified paper that contains a 10% postconsumer waste. FSC® (Forest Stewardship Council™) is an international, non-profit association that promotes well-managed forests by ensuring forestry practices that are environmentally responsible, socially equitable, and economically viable.

If you would like to become a contributor to Grand Cities Woman, please contact us via email at grandcitieswoman@live.com or call us at 701-2612692. We are currently searching for experts in their industry to submit articles relevant to women in our area.

Distributed by Graber Media, LLC through the following locations:

Grand Cities

If you would like to provide Grand Cities Woman to your clients or customers, please contact us by phone at 701-261-2692 or by email at grandcitieswoman@live.com.

Download and take us with you!

Hugo’s locations in Grand Forks and East Grand Forks SuperOne in Grand Forks Velkommen in Grand Forks

Miles of Heroes

Grand Forks Arthritis Walk Honorees Shelli Kasprick and Tori Byklum

An online version of this publication is available through our website at www.grandcitieswoman.com or www.issuu.com/grandcitieswoman. Read it from our site or download it to your desktop, Nook®, Kindle®, or iPad®.

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WOMAN

We're Growing Together Altru Health System 2012

Altru Health System 1997

United Hospital 1971

Grand Forks Clinic 1915

St. Luke's Hospital 1892

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Family Medicine Clinic at Altru Professional Center (Open Mid-October) With extended hours at a convenient location, patients can receive care when they need it. Same day appointments available at Altru's Family Medicine Clinic, located within Altru Professional Center, 1451 44th Ave South, Grand Forks.

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2012 September|October

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Save

Socialize

the Date

September 29

Hugo’s Potato Bowl 10k and Hugo’s Tater Tot 1 Mile Riverside Park

Wild Hog Grand Forks Half Marathon Town Square

Registration is from 4:00 p.m. to 5:15 p.m.

There is a 10k run and a 1 mile Tater Tot Trot. This year, the Tater Tot Trot will be for families of all ages. Kids can walk or run, or parents can push their kids in strollers.

For more information, go to www.gfmarathon.com.

September 15

October 13

Arthritis Walk Choice Health and Fitness Wellness Center

1:00 p.m. to 5:00 p.m.

The two starting locations are the GuestHouse TownHouse hotel in Grand Forks and the Blue Moose Bar & Grill in East Grand Forks.

Join the Arthritis Foundation Upper Midwest Region for the Arthritis Walk to help raise awareness and funds to support the 1 in 5 adults and 300,000 kids who are living with arthritis.

If you have questions, please contact Kelly Brekke at kbrekke@arthritis. org or call 701-388-1988.

September 22

October 15 - 16

Art and Wine Walk

Thompson Trot 5K Walk/Run 10:00 a.m.

Southbrook Park Come out and enjoy a fall morning at the Thompson Trot and check out our newly paved streets. Walk, jog, run, push a stroller, and chat with a friend. All proceeds will go to the Thompson Community Food Pantry, which serves area communities and families.

September 22

Women’s Business Summit Bismarck Civic Center This summit is for the strategic and savvy business woman. The featured keynote speaker will be Ali Brown. For more information, go to www. trainingnd.com.

October 20

Art and Wine Walk

Heart Walk UND Wellness Center

1:00 p.m. to 5:00 p.m.

The two starting locations are the GuestHouse TownHouse hotel in Grand Forks and the Blue Moose Bar & Grill in East Grand Forks.

Registration starts at 9:00am For more information, go to www.greatergrandforksheartwalk.org.

October 28

September 22 - October 29

Festivo: Design Collective of Eight Candlesticks Velkommen The installation and sale features a group of small and large scale works by glass blowing artist and designer Timo Sarpaneva of Helsinki, Finland.

The project was formed to promote the creation, education, and enjoyment of glass blowing.

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Explore

Please call ahead to confirm events. Promote your event by sending information to grandcitieswoman@live.com or by calling Autumn at (701) 261-2692.

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September|October 2012

Miss Grand Forks Pageant Prep Day Empire Arts Center For more information, contact Aly Wilhelmi-Downs by calling 701-2560217.

Shopping Guide

Hot Spots to

Shop

Find these items and more through local retailers. When purchasing an item that you’ve seen in our shopping guide, make sure you tell them that you saw it in Grand Cities Woman. Claims that products make in the Grand Cities Woman Shopping Guide are of product manufactures’ and not of Grand Cities Woman or Graber Media.

Mini Tart Pans The perfect size for single-serving tarts, quiches and cheesecakes. The 4”-diameter pans have detachable bases for easy removal of delicate crusts. Aluminized steel for even heat distribution. Easy-release nonstick coating for quick cleanup. Available through Pampered Chef Director and Trainer, Julie Haakenson, at www.pamperedchef.biz/juliehaak. $25.00 Bring your lunch to work in style with this Cypress Home insulated lunch bag available at Home of Economy. $12.99

Clarisonic Mia In just 60 seconds, remove 6x more makeup and 2x more dirt and oil than manual cleansing. The Clarisonic Mia brush uses a patented sonic frequency of more than 300 movements per second to clean, soften and smooth skin, reducing the appearance of visible pores.

Available through Truyu. $195.00

Hollow recesses along the blade edge prevent foods from sticking, resulting in clean slicing, dicing, chopping and mincing. Available through Pampered Chef Director and Trainer, Julie Haakenson, at www.pamperedchef.biz/juliehaak. $70.00 Formulated with pharmaceutical grade vitamin C and E this patented medical grade serum helps repair and protect the skin. It also helps correct signs of environmental damage, smooth skin texture and tone and helps promote healing regeneration. C&E Serum is available through Rejuv Skin and Laser Clinic. $135.00

This Danish iron candle chandelier is hand-forged in the tradition of Scandinavian iron work going back to the Viking age. This and other styles are available through Velkommen. $149.00

This indoor/outdoor lamp is made of real hand carved slate with hammered copper details. Due to the natural material being used each piece will vary. The rectangle bell shade has a brushed suede, weather resistant textile. The Uttermost Lamps and Lighting Slate, Tall, Table Lamp is available at Sterling Carpet One. $239.99 ESS Eucalyptus Essential Oil and Diffuser Add the clearing power of eucalyptus oil to your home in the bath, a diffuser or a vaporizer. Eucalyptus is extremely useful during the cooler months, and is excellent for treating colds and chills. Added bonus: your home will smell heavenly. This product is available at Truyu.

Oil $14.00 Diffuser $29.00

Exfoliating Lip Wand Transform your lips in one easy step! Nourishing wax microcrystals derived from jojba seeds slough away dry skin. They melt on contact to deliver soft, smooth and hydrated lips. Enhanced with a light, peachy scent - delicious! Available through Rejuv Skin and Laser Clinic. $15.50

For a home just like yours. Neither rain nor sleet nor gloom of winter will take its toll on these Swedish quality post boxes made of rugged steel. The boxes are available in three colors at Velkommen. $89.00

The Corelle Livingware Casa Flora 16-Piece Dinnerware Set is easy-care dinnerware for everyday dining. It comes in an elegant floral pattern in yellow and blue hues, making it ideal for all occasions. This and other patterns are available at Home of Economy. $31.99

Mount this Markaela Wine Holder to your wall and have a conversation piece for your next gathering. This solid mahogany with textural carving and rustic antiquing is available at Sterling Carpet One. $199.99

Garden

Extend Your Garden Enjoyment Strategies for Growing Edibles Later into the Season

by Melinda Myers, nationally known horticulturist, TV/radio host, author, and columnist.

Don’t let Autumn or potentially frosty temperatures stop you from enjoying garden-fresh produce. Extend the nutritional value and homegrown flavor into your fall and early winter meals with the help of short season crops and season-extending strategies.

your frame should be higher in the back than in the front so water and melting snow can drain off, and if possible, facing south for better warming. You can find plans on the Internet and garden books.

Lettuce, spinach, radishes, turnips, and beets are quick to mature from seed to harvest. Plus, the cooler temperatures enhance their flavor. Simply count the number of frost-free days left in your growing season and compare it with the number of days from planting to harvest listed on the seed packet.

I prefer the construction-free, all-purpose garden fabrics. Simply drape these floating row covers (season-extending fabrics) over your crops. Anchor the edges with rocks, boards, or wire wickets. The fabric traps heat around your plants, but allows air, light, and water through so there is no need to uncover the plants during the day or for watering.

Protect these late plantings and other vegetables from chilly fall temperatures with cloches, cold frames, and floating row covers. Many gardeners use these devices to jump start the season in spring and extend it much later into fall. These devices trap heat around the plants, protecting them from frosty temperatures.

Convert gallon milk jugs into garden cloches for individual plants. Remove the bottom of the jug and slide it over the plant. Use the cap to capture heat or remove to ventilate your homemade cloche on sunny days. Alternatively, you can purchase reusable cloches with built-in ventilation. Originally made of glass, many of the newer cloches are plastic, making them more affordable, easy to stack, and portable.

You can make your own cold frames. Many gardeners convert discarded windows, a bit of lumber, and nails into a homemade shelter for their plants. The window size usually determines the size of your cold frame; just make sure that you can reach all the plants inside. For best results, Melinda Meyers | Writer

Increase the ease of season-extending fabrics with low and tall frost pop-up covers and plant protection frost covers from Gardener’s Supply. The frames are fitted with all-purpose garden fabric to create protective tents. You can protect new plantings and extend your harvest by protecting plants down to 24 degrees Fahrenheit.

With a little preparation, you can keep enjoying fresh-fromthe-garden flavor long past the traditional end to your harvest season. [GCW]

Nationally known gardening expert, TV/radio host, author, and columnist Melinda Myers has more than 30 years of horticulture experience and has written over 20 gardening books, including Can’t Miss Small Space Gardening. She hosts the nationally syndicated “Melinda’s Garden Moment” segments, which air on over 100 TV and radio stations throughout the U.S. and Canada. She is a columnist and contributing editor for Birds & Blooms magazine and writes the twice-monthly “Gardeners’ Questions” newspaper column. Melinda also has a column in Gardening How-to magazine. Melinda hosted “The Plant Doctor” radio program for over 20 years, in addition to seven seasons of “Great Lakes Gardener” on PBS. She has written articles for Better Homes and Gardens and Fine Gardening and was a columnist and contributing editor for Backyard Living magazine. Melinda has a master’s degree in horticulture, is a certified arborist, and was a horticulture instructor with tenure. Her website is www. melindamyers.com.

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United Way Partners with

Imagination Library

By Autumn Graber

Have you read with your child today? Research reveals that children who are read to at an early age benefit greatly in their future education. The early years set the stage for our children’s future, and reading to your child is a gift that you can give them on a daily basis. My husband and I read to our children every evening before bed. It’s a time for us to gather without interruption from television or phones, and to focus on our kids.

United Way of Grand Forks, East Grand Forks and Area has now partnered with the Dolly Parton Imagination Library to bring children five years of age and younger free books that are delivered monthly right to their door. “Imagination Library Program inspires a love of reading; first to children and then by children,” said Pat Berger, United Way of Grand Forks, East Grand Forks & Area President and CEO. “Children [birth to their fifth birthday] enrolled in the program will receive a book a month mailed directly to them at their home. The books are high quality, age appropriate, and cover important themes and concepts for children.”

In 1996, Dolly Parton launched the book program to benefit the children in her home town in Tennessee. Since then, the program has caught the eye of service groups and other United Way chapters across the country. Currently, there are over 600,000 children registered in the national program. “We are very excited about this important literacy program, especially since it helps to accomplish our local goal of ‘children entering school ready to learn,’” said Berger.

For parents or guardians interested in participating in the program, getting your child signed up is simple. Preschool children living in Grand Forks County or the City of East Grand Forks are eligible and can be signed up online at www.unitedwaygfegf.org.

Once you have registered your child and received your first book, then simply sit down and take the time to read with your child. Each month, the program selects a new book based on your child’s gender and age.

United Way of Grand Forks, East Grand Forks & Area is celebrating fifty-five years of serving our community. “We made our million dollar goal last year which was a big accomplishment, especially as many local and national nonprofits saw their fundraising go down,” said Berger. This year’s goal is $1,025,000. The local United Way chapter relies heavily on corporate and private donations to continue to provide valuable services like Imagine Library to the communities of Grand Forks and East Grand Forks. [GCW]

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MissService, Grand Forks Scholarship,

Style, and Success Written by Autumn Graber

Saturday, November 24, young women ages 17 to 24 from Grand Forks and across the state of North Dakota will have the opportunity to compete for the titles of Miss Grand Forks and Miss Empire. The November pageant marks Caroline Brost’s fifth year as the Executive Director for the preliminary event leading to the Miss North Dakota Scholarship Pageant held in June in Williston and then ultimately to Miss America. “We probably have the best prize package in the area, we have a personal trainer the girls get to work with, and we have a wardrobe sponsor,” said Caroline. “So we try to make it as much fun as possible.”

The Grand Forks based pageant is expanding to include young women from across the river. “This year is very exciting because we are crowning our very first Minnesota title,” said Caroline. The pageant committee will not only be training and supporting two young women for the Miss North Dakota Scholarship Pageant, but they will also be accompanying Miss Grand Cities to the Miss Minnesota Scholarship Pageant.

The Miss America organization has been reinvented over the years. One example is the removal of the registration fees that the contestants previously paid, some of which derived from corporate sponsor dollars. Now, each contestant must solicit at least one hundred dollars in financial donations to the Children’s Miracle Network to complete their application and make them eligible to compete at a local level. According to the Children’s Miracle Network, the partnership has raised over $6 million since 2007, benefiting children’s hospitals across the nation. “It’s proved to put Miss America on the map as a service group instead of just a pageant,” said Caroline.

In addition to the titles and scholarships that will be awarded at the pageant, the pageant officials will award the young woman that raised the most money for Children’s Miracle Network with the “Miracle Maker” award. “We work with Hillary Mork at Sanford Children’s Clinic in Fargo and she lines up a family that has had a child treated at Sanford and they come as our special guest to present the award to the contestant that has raised the most money,” said Caroline.

Aly Wilhelmi-Downs came on board as the pageant’s business manager to help organize the title holder’s public appearances. “She jumped in and she is so good at it,” said Caroline. Not

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September|October 2012

only must the title holders compete at the state level, but they must also appear at community events to help promote their platform issues and get valuable experience being in front of large groups of people. “They’ve done a lot of events, even after coming back from state,” said Aly. “That keeps them excited. This is not just the state pageant and you are done.”

These community events aren’t just for smiling and waving anymore. “This year, Miss Eastern Dakota got to speak to Central High School about her platform because it was about renewable resources,” said Caroline. “It’s really created a new level of appre- Pictured: Caroline Brost, Director and Aly Wilhelmi, Business Manager. ciation for the program.”

For those interested in competing or just finding out more information, there will be a Prep Day at the Empire Arts Center on October 28. This is an opportunity to experience mock interviews, practice on the stage, and turn in paperwork. “We want new girls at prep day,” said Caroline. “They could become Miss America.”

Deadline for applications is October 28. If you are a business or potential contestant and want to discuss opportunities with the pageant, you can contact the pageant’s business manager, Aly Wilhelmi-Downs, at 701-256-0217 or you can send an email to missgrandforks@yahoo.com. [GCW]

Eligibility Requirements: Miss Grand Forks: must be between the ages of 17-24 (high school senior status or higher) and a student or resident from anywhere within Grand Forks County for at least six months prior to the 2013 local competition date. Those choosing to compete for the Grand Forks title are not eligible to win the Empire title.

Miss Empire (open): must be between the ages of 17-24 (high school senior status or higher) and a student or resident from anywhere within the state of North Dakota at least six months prior to the 2013 local competition date. Those competing for the Empire title are not eligible to win the Grand Forks title.

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Miss Grand Cities (open): must be between the ages of 17-24 (high school senior status or higher) and a student or resident from anywhere within the state of Minnesota at least six months prior to the 2013 local competition date.

Miss Grand Cities will advance to the Miss MN Scholarship Pageant.

Pictured: Miss Empire 2011, Becca Lebak; Miss North Dakota 2010-2011, Beth Dennison; Miss Eastern Dakota 2011, Nikki Anderson; Miss Grand Forks 2011, Emily Burkland at the 2011 Miss North Dakota Pageant.

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Health & Wellness

Have a More Comfortable

Pregnancy

By Mary Lundy, PT

I was recently blessed with the birth of my second son and I would like to share a few of the techniques I used to help me be more comfortable during my pregnancy.

Wear good shoes. The added weight of pregnancy is hard on

the feet, knees, and lower back. Every pound you gain places two to three times the pressure on these areas. We all love wearing cute sandals, heels, and flip flops, but you really need good, supportive shoes. If you are going to be on your feet for any length of time, forget fashion and wear a good pair of walking or running shoes. If this is not an option, wear low heels or sandals with builtin arch supports, never flip flops. The comfort and injury prevention are worth forgoing fashion for a couple of months.

Wear a pregnancy back support. These are made specifi-

cally for pregnancy to help support the lower back. You can find them online, or visit with your medical provider. A primary care physician, chiropractor, physical therapist, or local medical supply company should be able to order one for you or at least point you in the right direction.

Watch your posture. Even though you are pregnant, don’t “let it all hang out” because this causes you to over-arch your back. Keep your buttocks tucked under you, your navel pulled in slightly, and your knees soft. A great way to figure out the correct movement is to stand sideways by a mirror. Watch yourself move from arching the lower back (sticking out your buttocks) to tucking the buttocks under, decreasing the arch. Repeat 10 -20 times.

sitting and at the end of your day, lay on the sofa with the legs propped on an arm rest. Keep your feet moving to help with circulation. Drink plenty of water – be sure to get at least 8-10 eightounce glasses per day. Staying hydrated decreases your body’s tendency to retain fluids.

Get a massage. Schedule to see your favorite massage specialist, get a shiatsu massage pillow or chair back massager, and/or ask your family to rub your feet.

Exercise. Always follow your physician’ advice.

•

Abdominal and pelvic floor strengthening: It sounds crazy to think of strengthening the abs during pregnancy but it is really important for back stabilization. Do not do sit-ups or crunches, but simply pull the navel into the spine. This strengthens a muscle called the transverse abdominal, which functions to support the lower back. To take this exercise a step further, pull up the pelvic floor at the same time. This exercise is also known as a Kegal. To practice doing a Kegal, when you are urinating, stop the flow of urine and hold—focus on how this muscle feels so you know how to do it correctly. Do this during urination only once or twice a week— studies indicate that any more than this can cause a bladder infection. Kegals help prevent urinary incontinence. Another progression of this exercise is to pull the navel in, pelvic floor up, then tuck your buttocks under. You can do these exercises sitting, standing, and lying—anytime.

Keep swelling of the legs and feet in check. Wear support stockings or Thrombo Embolic Deterrent (TED) hose when on your feet. Get your feet up—rest the feet during the day when Mary Lundy, PT | Writer Mary’s professional career started at Mayville State, where she attained a BS in Biology and Physical Education—one inorganic class away from a minor in chemistry—her emphasis is in Exercise Physiology. She worked as a trainer with Sports Acceleration, taught many different aerobic and weight training classes, and did aide work at a physical therapy department. During this time, Mary returned to school, attained a Masters in Physical Therapy, and found her professional passion.

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Doorway chest stretch: Face the doorway, stand almost in it, place hands, forearms, and elbows on the door frame, step into the doorway with one leg and move the body forward, keep abs in/buttocks tucked (don’t arch the lower back); keep the shoulders back and down. Keep head up, straight, and tucked back as if you are trying to keep the back of your head against a wall while making a double chin at the same time.

Angry Cat lower back stretch: (Use a mirror so you can watch for correct form.) Start on the floor on all fours—a crawling position. Pull your navel into your spine and tuck your buttocks under while you focus on rounding the lower back to the ceiling. Drop the head so you are looking at your knees. Think about how a cat looks when it sees a really big dog.

Hold 10-30 seconds then let the back sag and lift the head. Repeat 5-15 times, depending on comfort.

As with any exercise or suggestion, visit with your medical provider prior to performing, and if there are aggravations while performing, stop and call your physician. [GCW]

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7 qt. paste tomatoes; peeled, cored, and chopped 4 c. long green chili peppers; seeded and chopped 5 c. onion, chopped ½ c. jalapeno peppers; seeded and finely chopped 6 cloves garlic, minced 2 c. bottled lemon or lime juice 2 Tbsp. salt ½ Tbsp. red pepper 2 Tbsp. ground cumin 3 Tbsp. oregano leaves 2 Tbsp. fresh cilantro

Procedure: Wash hands thoroughly before handling food. Prepare peppers as described previously. Wear rubber gloves while handling chili peppers or wash hands thoroughly with soap and water before touching your face.

Prepare tomatoes: Wash tomatoes. Dip in boiling water for 30 to 60 seconds or until skins split, then dip in cold water. Slip off skins and remove cores.

Combine all ingredients except cumin, oregano, and cilantro in a large pot and bring to a boil, stirring frequently. Reduce heat and boil 10 minutes. Add herbs and spices and simmer for another 20 minutes, stirring occasionally. Ladle the hot sauce into hot pint jars, leaving ½-inch headspace. Wipe jar rims. Cap with properly pretreated lids. Adjust lids and process in a boiling water canner for 20 minutes.

Yield: 13 pints Note: This recipe is best suited for paste tomatoes. Slicing tomatoes require a much longer cooking time to achieve a desirable consistency. You can decrease the amounts of spices, but increasing the amount is not advised. You can make adjustments to suit your tastes after opening the jars.

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September|October 2012

Behl’s Photography

When Adults Bully

By Kristine Paranica

Carla began her new job in January, excited to be part of such a successful business. A few months later, her excitement changed to dread. She experienced continual criticism from her supervisor, and there seemed to be different standards set for her compared to others. She was accused and blamed for things over which she had no control. Her supervisor called her “the New Hire” when talking to her directly, in addition to using a derogative tone behind her back. Carla was not included in informal office gatherings such as lunch or after hours’ activities. She overheard her supervisor talking about her and ridiculing her appearance to other employees. Twice, her supervisor took credit and credited others for work that Carla did without acknowledging her. By July, Carla was suffering from headaches, loss of appetite, insomnia, and decreased ability to concentrate. She was miserable. Carla felt like she had nowhere to go, no one to talk with, and had no options. She put in her resignation by the end of the month.

Can you relate to Carla’s story? The reality is that bullying isn’t only a play-ground activity anymore; it regularly occurs in many workplace settings. In a 2010 survey done by the Workplace Bullying Institute, over 6,200 employees were asked about workplace bullying. Thirty-five percent of those surveyed had experienced bullying firsthand; 58% of bullying targets were women, and in 62% of the cases, men did the bullying. In 80% of the cases where women were bullied, other women were the bullies. In fact, the majority of bullying is same-gender harassment. (http://www.workplacebullying.org/wbiresearch/2010-wbinational-survey/ Accessed 7/25/11)

What type of behavior constitutes bullying? While there is no single, formal definition of workplace bullying, the following are a few types of behavior that encompass bullying: • Repeated, unreasonable actions of individuals (or a group) that are directed toward an employee (or a group of employees) and are intended to intimidate, degrade, humiliate, or undermine • Misuse or abuse of power by one employee over another, creating feelings of defenselessness and injustice in the targeted employee and undermines the individual’s right to dignity at work • Key features include: repetition, duration, escalation, power disparity, attributed intent • Systematic aggressive communication, manipulation of work, and acts aimed at humiliating or degrading one or more individuals that create an unhealthy and unprofessional power imbalance between the bully and the target(s), resulting in psychological consequences for target(s) and co-workers, and cost enormous monetary damage to an organization line

Bullying is much more severe than the occasional isolated incident or some bad behavior; it is intentional, long-term, systematic, and usually singles out one person. Sometimes, bullying can look like mobbing or gang activity where almost everyone joins in to bully one or two employees. What generally happens is that other employees see this going on, might laugh at it for a while, and will eventually realize that they had better join the bully or risk the chance of becoming the next target.

This raises an important question: Why don’t bystanders step up to stop the bullying? The reality is that bullying takes place in the presence of a large group of relatively uninvolved bystanders. In many cases, it is the bully’s ability to create the illusion

that he or she has the support of the majority present, which instills the fear of speaking out in protestation of the bullying activities being observed by the group. Unless the “bully mentality” is effectively challenged in any given group in its early stages, it often becomes an accepted norm within the group. In fact, some statics indicate that when a bystander speaks out to protect the bullied person, the bullying stops 50% of the time.

What to do if you are the target of bullying: • •

Find support from another colleague at work and ask him or her to stand up with you Tell your supervisor the effect that the bullying behavior has on you -Work with your manager, HR representative, or a conflict management professional to devise strategies for addressing the problem -Plan a meeting together, where you clearly identify what the behaviors are and determine a way to mitigate the problem -Ask to set up mediation with the bully and consider whether you will need an advocate or support person present -Management might consider a team-building approach, where conflict/issues are addressed by the entire team, including management, so new positive norms and social expectations can be developed and agreed upon

• • • •

Keep a log of all bullying incidents, focusing on patterns and repetition of the behavior Keep copies of any harassing emails or written communication that is used to intimidate you Expect the bully to deny and perhaps misconstrue your accusations, so protect yourself by having a witness/coworker with you during any interactions with the bully Do not retaliate

Kristine Paranica, JD | Writer

Kristine has been the Director of the Conflict Resolution Center at the University of North Dakota since 1999 and has been providing training and education in transformative mediation, conflict management, and other processes for over 12 years. She is nationally recognized as a Certified Transformative Mediator™.

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30-Second Beauty Tips

By Rachel Horton

You wake up, hop in the shower before the kids wake up, roughly dry your hair, and then throw on some clothes. Soon after, the kids wake up; you get them breakfast, get them dressed, and then rush out the door to get your errands done before dropping the kids off for summer soccer practice. Finally, a moment to yourself…or is it? I find that I rarely have, or more so take, time for myself these days.

This is because we, as mothers, spend so much time taking care of everyone else that we forget about ourselves. However, that doesn’t need to be the case. What follows are three 30-second beauty ideas that can help spice up your everyday routine.

1 2 3

My first tip is a fun one for your hair. No matter your age, hair color, or hair type, this tip is simple and effective. And, all you need is a bobby pin! Stand in front of the mirror and decide where you want your hair parted. Part your hair accordingly. Then, take your thumb and index finger and put them right on your forehead where it meets your hairline (the distance between fingers is up to you and will simply make a smaller or larger section). Make sure one of the fingers lines up with your part, and then slide your fingers back into your hair. Pretend that there is a line drawn from ear to ear, up and over your head—you do not want to pass behind that line. Once you have slid your fingers back, pinch them together. Grab the bobby pin with your other hand and open it to form a V shape. Put the tips of the open bobby pin onto your head and on either side of your pinched bang section. Angle the closed part of the bobby pin back and the open ends toward your face. Slide the pin forward until the closed part of the bobby pin has met your pinched section of hair.

After the hair is pinned, loosely grab onto your bang section and gently tug forward to give your hair some volume. And, there you have it: a hidden pin and a quick, cute way to dress up the front of your hair! When you are comfortable with this method, try twisting or braiding the bang section before you pin it back for something new and fun.

The second tip is for makeup. A general suggestion that I give for makeup is to follow the color wheel. Using the color wheel, find your eye color and then look to the opposing side of the wheel. These opposing colors will amplify the color of your eyes. For those with green eyes, try a bronze rose shadow. The bronze is earthy and neutral, which compliments your eye color, but will also accentuate your eyes, making them more noticeable. For blue eyes, try a sandy mauve or sherbet peach. A subtle tone in the orange family will enhance your baby blues. Because hazel is a multi-tonal color, those of you who have hazel eyes would look for something metallic. Anything in the bronze or copper family will work wonders. Those who have brown eyes can go anywhere around the color wheel because brown is a neutral color. I love enhancing brown eyes with plums and navy blues. Introduce these color ideas to the outer corner of your eyes, and then get ready to turn some heads!

My last tip is for general beauty. Protect yourself from the sun and heat! Many products on the market offer built-in SPF. Most makeup foundations now have at least a level 15 SPF. At my salon, I use Kenra Haircare products, and my all-time favorite product that they make is Blow Dry Spray ($24). The product is revolutionary in its ability to protect from all heat styling, including UVA and UVB rays.

It also has natural evaporants that dramatically reduce your blow dry time; thus, making your hair healthier! Another plus is that Blow Dry Spray has a tropical smell, which could transport you to your own personal paradise.

Although I am so busy with my little one, I always try to devote at least 5 minutes a day for myself. I know it’s a small amount of time, but it is a start. Treat yourself—you deserve it! [GCW] Rachel Horton | Writer

Rachel Horton is a local hairstylist that owns her own salon booth, called “The Hair Movement,” within the Ultimate Look outlet. Originally from Rosemount, Minnesota, Rachel came to Grand Forks to pursue a degree in Nursing and Theatre at UND. After a change of heart, Rachel decided to follow her passion for beauty and hair and pursued cosmetology at the Aveda Institute in Minneapolis, Minnesota. After graduating from the Institute, Rachel moved back to Grand Forks to work at an Aveda salon. Rachel married her high school sweetheart and they just welcomed their first child, Elliott, in September. After a challenging pregnancy, Rachel pursued her own business so that she could spend more time with her family and son. Rachel and her family are happy to call Grand Forks home.

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Grand Weddings Photography Gallery

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Stacie’s Photography

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This Day

The Magic Blanket

By Shannon Teigen

We were all 20 years older. Sure, there were a few silver hairs (or a real good color job) and some ever-so-faint lines surfacing around our eyes. But looking at my friends, I thought we all looked nearly the same as we did 20 years ago, sans the 80s hair and sweatshirts worn inside out (why we did that, I’ll never know). We were friends in college, and life had taken us down different roads for the past 20 years, but we had the opportunity to get reacquainted at one of our classmate’s beautiful home a few months ago. We were on a beautiful little lake near Park Rapids, MN. While hiking to the lake and floating on the pontoon, we reminisced about college days and explained where our dreams had taken us. It was truly a rejuvenating weekend.

One night, someone pulled out The Chick Game. It reminded me of the game youngsters play, Truth or Dare. Except this version was made for 40-something women–there were no dares. I guess the creators of the game figured at this point in life, we’d all rather tell our story than prove our bravery. Cards were drawn, questions were asked, and we all took turns around the campfire sharing our answers.

One question in particular sticks in my memory. “What has been your favorite gift you’ve received and why.” I initially had that familiar, yet uncomfortable feeling from my youth, where I worried that my friends would find my answer quirky. But when it came my turn to share, I reminded myself that I’m a grown woman, and began the story of the Magic Blanket.

The Magic Blanket was a gift given to me by my great-aunt, Jennie Efraimson, when I was about 18. It is a typical afghan pattern of hexagon shapes crocheted together using scrap yarn. It is not fancy, but it is special because Jennie made it.

Jennie was the kind of woman that could make anything.

She could sew, quilt, crochet, weave rugs, garden, can, and cook. Jennie was the epitome of a homemaker, and I wish I was a little more like her. As kids, we got excited when the grown-ups announced that we were going to the farm to see Jennie. There was always some mouthwatering homemade cookie or pastry and a cup of coffee for

guests, and the candy dish had a bottomless supply of peppermints.

If we were lucky, they were the pink peppermints instead of the white ones.

The afghan Jennie made traveled with me to college and soon became known as the Magic Blanket because it always seemed to comfort me. Suffering from that monthly gift we women are blessed with, I would curl up in my bed with the afghan wrapped around me, the soft yarn tassels sometimes tickling my neck. After resting under the Magic Blanket, my pain and discomfort were gone.

If I had been younger, I would have almost believed the blanket had some magic powers like Harry Potter’s cape, but infused with estrogen. Magic powers or no, I didn’t care, the blanket eased my pain and shielded me from discomfort.

Over the years, the Magic Blanket has wrapped my three children when they have suffered from colds, the flu, and bumps or bruises. I’ve also grinned as I’ve snuck a peek at my husband curled up under the Magic Blanket a time or two. That handmade gift has and continues to touch our lives. When someone in my family is ill they ask for the Magic Blanket by name.

Even though I’ve received many wonderful gifts in my life, the Magic Blanket holds the honor of being my favorite. Not because of its grandeur or value, but because a special woman took the time to create it for an 18-year-old great niece.

That is the story I shared of the Magic Blanket that night around the camp fire. Bracing for some light-hearted ribbing from my college friends, which we all took turns receiving 20 years ago; I smiled when one of my friends said “I love that story, Shannon. I want to make a magic blanket for my kids.” As it turned out, her family was going through a difficult time and she thought the comfort of a Magic Blanket would help her young children.

I encourage you to surround yourself with friends, notice and appreciate how much you’ve grown, and share your stories.

You’ll be surprised at how much we stay the same, yet change. It may also surprise you that your story is just what someone else needs to hear on this day. [GCW]

Shannon Teigen | Writer

Shannon writes from her rural hobby ranch that is nestled in the peace and quiet of the North Dakota countryside. Her family, consisting of her husband, two teenage daughters, and one son, is the farthest thing from being peaceful and quiet, but she wouldn’t trade it for anything. After graduating from UND, Shannon established her career with foundation blocks of marketing, sales, customer service, human relations, and communications.

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Miles of Heroes Grand Forks Arthritis Walk Helps to Fund Research and Program Services

By Autumn Graber

About 300,000 children in the United States have a form of juvenile arthritis. What did you say? That is correct. The ailment once considered a disease reserved for the more mature population now has no age limit.

Tori Byklum, age 13, is one of the honorees for this year’s Arthritis Walk, which will be held on Saturday, October 13 at Choice Health & Fitness in Grand Forks. “Tori got diagnosed when she was five years old,” said Tori’s mom, Tami Byklum. Tori was an average five-and-a-half year old eagerly anticipating first grade in the fall. While on a summer camping trip, Tori woke up one morning with unbearable pain in her legs and feet. She had been in a nearby campsite with a friend and remembers that she could barely pedal her bike back to her parent’s campsite. “I went in the camper crying and I laid [sic] down,” said Tori. “My leg pain went away and my neck started hurting and then my fingers started hurting.” After a couple of visits to the doctor to rule out West Nile, Leukemia, and any other viral infection, the doctors determined that it was systemic arthritis.

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Shelli Kasprick and Tori Byklum

Since then, the Byklum family has spent a lot of time learning about the disease, including attending the national conference for juvenile arthritis. “There are breakout sessions for the kids and the parents,” said Tami. “Sometimes it’s nice to talk to other people that are in the same boat as us.”

Great strides have been made in the research and treatment of juvenile arthritis. At the national conference ten years ago, it was common to see most children who suffered with arthritis to be confined to wheelchairs or crutches. “Last year I don’t remember seeing anyone in wheelchairs,” said Tami.

Arthritis doesn’t get the same attention as some of the other diseases plaguing many of us because it’s hard to see when someone is suffering from it. Once Tori entered first grade that fall, she was excused from class many times for medical appointments. She recalls being picked on by some classmates because they said she didn’t look sick. “When we were first told it was arthritis, then my first thought was

she was going to be in a wheelchair and she isn’t going to be able to do anything,” said Tami. “Obviously, that’s not the case.”

Tori is participating in her fifth year with Camp M.A.S.H. (Make Arthritis Stop Hurting). Camp M.A.S.H. is a sixday residential camping experience for children ages 9 to 17 years old who have some form of juvenile arthritis or related condition. Tori and other kids who suffer from arthritis are able to participate in activities like horseback riding, zip lining, and swimming. In fact, some of the funds raised in the Arthritis Walk go to providing scholarships to children that travel to this camp in the Wisconsin Dells.

Fundraisers like the Arthritis Walk, which will be held in Grand Forks, provide scholarships to young people who are diagnosed with some form of juvenile arthritis. The camp is designed by experienced professionals and includes activities that the camper may not otherwise experience. The activities are designed to be safe for the campers with arthritis or related conditions.

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The Arthritis Foundation’s goal is to raise funds that can not only be used as scholarships for M.A.S.H. Camp, but will also support research and education during national conferences.

“The Arthritis Walk is the signature fundraising event for the Arthritis Foundation,” said Kelly Brekke, Arthritis Foundation Upper Midwest Region, Community Development Manager. “This year will mark the first annual Grand Forks Arthritis Walk, and Tori (front) at M.A.S.H. Camp through this event, we hope to raise awareness for the 1 in 5 adults and 300,000 children who live with arthritis. Our goal is to make a positive impact on their lives by raising funds to help support local Arthritis Foundation Programs for Better Living, educational seminars, and free educational materials to people with arthritis in this area. Our goal this year is to raise $17,000 and we hope to have over 200 participants and 25 teams.”

Tori may be wise beyond her years. During an exercise at church, she was asked to write down something that she would like to change about her life and something that she is grateful that God has given her. While some would have wanted to change the fact that they have arthritis, Tori wrote down that she was grateful for it because otherwise she wouldn’t have met all the people she has met over the years of her treatment.

Shelli Kasprick, the Arthritis Walk’s cohonoree, was diagnosed with arthritis at the age of 21. “I had just gotten married and I woke up one morning and my shoulder had a really bad pain in it,” said Shelli. She was diagnosed with bursitis, a form of arthritis where small sacks of fluid near joints, tendons, and bones swell to painful proporKasprick

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tions. “I was young and I had stuff to do,” said Shelli alluding to the frustration she had at the time. After a few years of cortisone shots and an additional diagnosis of rheumatoid arthritis, Shelli faced a total knee replacement and foot surgery to ease the pain.

The pain may have ceased for the time being, but Shelli was then diagnosed with breast cancer. “I caught it right away,” said Shelli.

After a lumpectomy, chemo, and radiation, she is now cancer free.

“New technology is so important for people with different types of arthritis and cancer,” said Shelli. “There are good days and there are bad days, but I’ve made it this far and I look forward to what tomorrow brings.”

Even though Shelli’s diagnoses left her with the option to let it takeover her life, she didn’t let it. She credits her kids for keeping her moving. “I have kids; otherwise, I would stay on the couch all day,” Shelli said.

What is the Mile of Heroes?

The walk will devote a one-mile section to those who have been affected by arthritis. Ten dollar markers will be placed along the mile to recognize individuals living with arthritis or those who have passed away. Markers can also recognize the special people that make living with arthritis easier, like doctors, healthcare professionals, or support groups.

The walk promises to have something for the whole family. “The event will be fun for the whole family, and participants can choose from a one or three mile walk, a 5k Zombie Fun Run, or the Kids’ Half Mile Monster Dash.

The event will also feature a free health fair, kids’ zone, and refreshments,” said Brekke.

The Arthritis Walk in Grand Forks will take place at Choice Health and Fitness on October 13 and features a one to three mile walk route and 5k run. The event will have activities for families, including a kid’s zone, health fair, music, and prizes. To purchase a Hero Marker, go to www.arthritiswalk.org. If you have any questions regarding the event, please contact Kelly Brekke by phone at 701-388-1988 or by email at kbrekke@arthritis.org. [GCW]

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