Grapeshot Magazine | 'Mate' by Grapeshot Magazine

ISSUE 3: MATE

CAMPUS NEWS & LIFE | ARTS & CULTURE | STYLE & SUSTAINABILITY | REVIEWS | & MORE

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Win a trip to Uluru INTERNATIONAL STUDENTS, MAKE YOUR VOICE HEARD! Complete the International Student Barometer Survey by 15 May 2015 for your chance to win one of the following prizes: • $1,000 cash • A return trip for two to Uluru plus accommodation • 2 x Sydney Harbour Bridge Climb tickets • One of 10 x $100 Coles Group and Myer Gift Cards.

Visit goto.mq.edu.au/isb This important survey will help the University improve its services for international students.

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WATSON CALENDAR APRIL/MAY MONDAY

TUESDAY

WEDNESDAY

THURSDAY

Amaya Lang - Fishy exhibition opening night @ 107 Projects 6pm

Sons of the East @ Hotel Steyne 9pm

SESSION 1 RESUMES Grapeshot Issue 3 released

Grapeshot Issue 4 released

LAST DATE TO WITHDRAW FROM UNIT(S) WITHOUT ACADEMIC PENALTY

Culturally Themed Bruch 11am hosted by Campus Engagement

IDAHOT @ Central Courtyard All day

Courtney Barnett @ the Metro Theatre 8pm Twerps @ Newtown Social Club 8pm

Comedy Night @ Ubar 7pm

TEDxSydney 2015 @ Sydney Opera House 8am

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

MCA ARTBAR curated by Karen Therese 7pm ‘Wander’ submission deadline

Finders Keepers Markets opens @ Australian Technology Park 6pm

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Vivid LIVE: Sufjan Stevens @ Sydney Opera House 8:30pm

ANZAC Day

Jack Ladder & the Dreamlanders @ OAF 8pm

World Press Photo exhibition opens @ the State Library NSW 9am

Mother’s Day

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Vivid LIVE: The Drones @ Sydney Opera House 8:30pm

Do you have an upcoming event? Let us know and we’ll do our best to include it in our calendar. Email grapeshot@mq.edu.au

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of a bogan and on a more serious note, the grim state of domestic violence (p. 10), and Indigenous peoples in Australia.

DEPUTY EDITOR’S LETTER

REGINA FEATHERSTONE I ‘spose I shouldn’t start our third issue ‘Mate’ with anything less than a ‘G’Day’. This issue is dedicated to all things Australiana. We’re celebrating our country; from our accent (p. 34) to Kath and Kim (p. 25), Victoria Bitters (p. 18) to Tame Impala (p. 48) – we’re covering it all. We chose ‘Mate’ as our title because it is so versatile. It can be used in disbelief, ‘Maaaaate, are you serious?’ or to tell someone they need to relax, ‘watch it, mate.’ There’s the online-angry-jokeybut-mostly-angry, ‘You wot m8?’ and the stern, ‘Mate, I’m telling you…’ Just as ‘mate’ can mean a whole bunch of different things, so can our Australian identity. When discussing this issue at Grapeshot HQ we pondered the true definition

It’s not all beer and skittles in this issue. As much as mateship is a part of Australian culture, Alicia Scott examines its paradoxes in our current LGBTQIA+ and women’s climate (p. 32). Toby Hemmings speaks to a butcher and gets an insiders perspectives on what happens in the meat shop (p. 28). This theme is relevant now more than ever. We are a country who prides ourselves on our willingness to help one another, to work hard, and to party even harder. Is this perception of ourselves real? When we look to our actions towards refugees, women, indigenous peoples and job seekers, it’s easy to see our self-image transform to something more ugly. This issue is a celebration of our wonderful country but we hope, it is not an ignorant one. I think we’re as proud as punch of this one.

Macquarie University Law Society magazine Edition 1, 2015 (Volume 21)

EDITORIAL & CREATIVE PRODUCTION EDITOR IN CHIEF Sarah Basford DEPUTY EDITOR Regina Featherstone FEATURES EDITOR Jack Cameron Stanton NEWS EDITOR Anna Glen REGULARS EDITOR Vanessa Capito COPY EDITOR Amelia van der Rijt WEB EDITOR Raelee Lancaster EDITORIAL ASSISTANTS Nicholas Wasiliev & Aswathi Neelakandan CREATIVE DIRECTOR Natasha Michels GRAPHIC DESIGNER Samuel Ip MARKETING TEAM ADVERTISING MANAGER Michael Rosser MARKETING MANAGER Joanna Marciniak OUR AWESOME CONTRIBUTORS Kezia Brooks, Cameron Colwell, Stephanie Costi, Madi Day, Duke Francis, Jacqueline Giesser, Toby Hemmings, Kelly Rae Olander, Nicholas Rider, Alicia Scott, Hamish Sharp, Blake Sherry, Charlie Smith EDITORIAL REVIEW BOARD STUDENT MEMBERS Emma Grimley, Jack Morgan, Jacob Rock, Kris Gilmour, Natalie Morton, Patrick Barkachi, Sarah Cameron, Yi Wong COORDINATOR Melroy Rodrigues PUBLISHER Craig Oliver

Grapeshot would like to acknowledge the Darug people as the traditional custodians of the land on which we work, and pay our respects to their elders, past and present.

onnolwine S BE ST AC C ES S AU ST RA LI A’ IC AT IO N LAW ST UD EN T PU BL AN YT IM E, AN YW HE RE

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Edition 1, 2015 | 1

www.facebook.com/ thebriefmagazine

www.issuu.com/muls

www.muls.org

ISSUE 3: MATE

CONTENTS 3 NEWS

17 REGULARS

27 FEATURES

37 CREATIVE

8 NEWS FLASH

18 YOU TAKING THE PISS,

28 THE HAPPY BUTCHER

38 BETWEEN FRIENDS

10 BAIRD’S REFORMS

MATE?

30 WE’RE NOT BIRDS

40 COLD VEIL

SHAKE UP DOMESTIC

20 RECLAIMING THE WOG

32 PARADOX OF

41 IN DARJEELING

VIOLENCE SECTOR

22 IF YOU CARRY HER, YOU

AUSTRALIAN MATESHIP

42 ANZAC PHOTOS

12 FAITH BASED

BOTH WILL FALL

34 THE AUSSIE ACCENT

ORGANISATION TAKES

24 IS CATCALLING

EMBARGO

CONTROL OVER

INNOCUOUS?

43 REPEAT OFFENDERS

AUSTRALIA’S FIRST

25 ADVICE FROM FAKE

FEMINIST REFUGE

KATH & KIM

14 IN-MATES:

26 STUDENT VOICE

AUSTRALIA’S RISKY

44 THE STEW 46 REVIEWS 50 HOROSCOPES 51 FIND-A-WORD

PUNISHMENT SYSTEM FOR OUR TEENAGERS 16 #ONE MOB UNITE FOR WA

Contents || 5

NEWS

News || 7

NEWS FLASH WORDS || NICHOLAS WASILIEV & ANNA GLEN

SYDNEY UNI LETS STUDENTS SHIRK HSC The University of Sydney has developed a pilot program to allow students from Scots College to enter into its courses without sitting the Higher School Certificate. The Diploma of Tertiary Preparation was originally designed for mature age students but has recently opened up for high school leavers. The university claims the program was an attempt to widen access to mid-ranking students who had the potential to succeed in a university setting but were expected to gain low ATARs between fifty-five and seventy. Eight students from the school elected to take the seventeen week course at a cost of twelve thousand dollars and six have since been offered places at the university.

The 11th Sydney Comedy Festival program has been revealed, with over 180 shows scheduled between 20 April and 17 May 2015. Many famous international comedians are guaranteed to tickle your funny bones, including Ross Noble, Noel Fielding, the Topp Twins, Dave Anthony and Stephen K Amos. Additionally, the line-up has a strong local input, with Lawrence Leung, Akmal, Tom Gleeson and Superwog heading up a long list of local comedians. This is the biggest edition of the comedy festival so far, and it’s sure to put a smile on your dial. For more details about programs and ticket prices, head to www.sydneycomedyfest.com.au. Tickets are already in high demand, so be sure to check these out!

ON THE FEDERAL FRONT

LIBERALS WIN IN NSW

While Tony Abbott and Bill Shorten are gearing up for the next federal election, the issue of education has become an increasingly debated topic, with the Liberals pushing for deregulation reforms. If elected, Labor has proposed a reintroduction of caps on places at university and a $500 million reduction in funds over the next three years. According to Education Minister, Christopher Pyne, this could result in a loss of up to 120,000 places at university, including 4,000 from Macquarie University. Labor argues that the Coalition’s reforms could lead to $100,000 degrees. Great options, huh?

Mike Baird has been successfully returned to power for a second term, despite his Government’s loss of over sixteen seats in a massive swing towards Labor. The result hardly came as a surprise, however. Even the bookies gave him $1.01 odds of winning, while Labor had modest odds of $22.50 (yes, they’re even betting on elections now). But don’t fret, Labor voters. There’s always the next election…

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SURVEY TO GAUGE INTERNATIONAL STUDENTS’ EXPERIENCE AT MQ WORDS || SARAH BASFORD International students at Macquarie University can shape their future before and after graduation by participating in a nationwide survey to improve support, living and learning outcomes. The International Student Barometer is a two-pronged survey. It gives students an opportunity to express their views and allows the university to measure the quality and scope of its services. It is a combination of recognising students as stakeholders, delivering real-time feedback and communicating: “You said – we did” communication that makes this survey most important. The university understands that participating in a survey requires time and effort. It also recognises students need to reflect on their experiences and to recall and share opinions on issues.

To help increase response rates the university has decided to motivate international students with a bag of prizes, including a return trip for two to Uluru (Ayers Rock) in Central Australia. The university’s international office is sponsoring the survey but i-graduate, an independent research vendor administers the process, which covers all 34 universities Australia wide. The results of the survey allow universities to benchmark indictors and rankings and better understand decision-making, perceptions, expectations and experiences of international students. The survey will focus on four key fields, including pre-arrival, learning, living and support services. These results are then benchmarked with local and international institutions and used to evaluate the success of systems and services, which impact the international student experience. In previous years, international student survey participation at Macquarie University has been below the national average but we are now expecting to achieve an increase in

student participation. In response, Macquarie International Office has developed a campus wide communications strategy, which it hopes will equal or exceed national participation rates among international students. Larry Anderson, Macquarie’s International Project Manager said incentives will be offered to offset survey fatigue, increase participation rates and to advance the universities service proposition. Response to the results of previous surveys have included an increase in personalised communication with international students, increased support for the Buddy and Mentors system, as well, as more fun activities to promote friendship and communication between international and domestic students. The survey will open on Monday 20 April and close on Friday 15 May. International students who undertake the survey will be in the running to receive a multitude of giveaways including a return trip to Uluru and tickets to a Sydney Harbour Bridge climb.

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SPECIAL ISSUE: DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

BAIRD’S REFORMS SHAKE UP DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SECTOR, CAUSING “ABSOLUTE CHAOS” WORDS || ALICIA SCOTT

Australian Domestic violence statistics are extremely alarming, showing it is now the leading preventable cause of illness, injury, and death of women aged between nineteen and forty-four. While the issue has well and truly shifted into the public interest domain, federal and state governments are still struggling to take necessary action to tackle the topic.

Home reforms, which are the new approaches to the delivery of homelessness services, have shaken up the domestic violence sector. “What we have seen in NSW since the tenders were announced on [13 June] 2014 is a complete realignment of the way that services are funded and what they are expected to do. It was the first time it had ever been reformed, so of course it caused absolute chaos,” Baulch explains. The reforms aim to better respond to people who are homeless or at risk of homelessness, by making services more accessible through better planning and resource allocation. As family and domestic violence is a well-known cause of homelessness, a significant amount of the sector’s funding comes from these reforms.

CEO of Domestic Violence NSW, Moo Baulch, states, “It is a national emergency and the number [of deaths] is significant. If it were eighty to one hundred women per year dying from something else there would be an emergency response, and if it were eighty men a year there would be an immediate way of coming up with a solution.”

Baulch elaborates, “The idea was to get a whole bunch of organisations working together in partnerships to streamline funding, but it is not something you can force … suddenly asking people to work in a different way is often really jarring for organisations.”

The NSW Government’s Going Home Staying

“NSW has been divided into fifteen FACS [Family

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and Community Service] regions, but there is no consistency across the state now … in some places there’s no domestic violence package, and in other places there’s no services for young people … This initiative is problematic when it comes to women and children escaping domestic violence, because we know the demand is across the state.”

violence, Baulch added that “services including trauma specialists, refuges, and men’s behavioral change programs – all of those different parts of the puzzle – need decent funding. We ask for $100 million over three years, which may sound like a lot of money, but when you consider that domestic violence costs NSW nearly $4.3 billion every year, $100 million is nothing”.

Last month, Domestic Violence NSW and the Men’s Behaviour Change Network of NSW announced the development of the ‘A Safer State’ Report. The purpose of the report is to provide a clear policy direction for the NSW Government, in order to help end to domestic violence and sexual assault within a generation. The report emphasises the importance of having strong leadership and a proper financial investment in the system in order to achieve a decisive outcome.

As the CEO of the statewide representative body for domestic violence, Baulch firmly believes that primary prevention and early intervention work to stem domestic violence must begin with parents educating their children at home.

Baulch, who was involved in the design of the report, said “We need to have a really strong message from community leaders because it’s all very well for Baird or Abbott to say they condemn domestic violence – it’s great when they speak out – however, that message needs to filter down into communities”.

Despite the present urgency surrounding family and domestic violence in Australia, Baulch remains an eternal optimist about tackling the prevailing issue.

Baulch suggested “we should start having a broader conversation with children from a young age about things like respect, difference, homophobia, discrimination and healthy relationships in the family”.

“I don’t think we can go back now. We have opened up enough people’s stories and enough peoples’ eyes that people have to do something about it.”

In terms of implementing a sustainable, long-term investment in the prevention of family and domestic

News || 11

SPECIAL ISSUE: DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

FAITH BASED ORGANISATION TAKES CONTROL OVER AUSTRALIA’S FIRST FEMINIST REFUGE WORKING WITH DOMESTIC VIOLENCE: AN INTERVIEW WITH TANIA SMITH WORDS || HAMISH SHARP

Throughout Australia’s history, domestic violence has remained a misunderstood social issue. One woman dies from domestic violence every week, and this year that rate is set to double. Tania Smith has dedicated ten years of her life and career to supporting the victims of domestic violence in NSW. Previously acting as Manager of Elsie Woman’s Refuge, Smith has recently become the Manager of the Sydney District West Family Homelessness Support Services. This service runs crisis properties solely for the use of women and their children. Its other services include transitional properties as well as numerous outreach services. Grapeshot spoke with Smith to receive some insight into how the changes brought about by the Going Home Staying Home (GHSH) reforms have affected the crisis properties and their clients. Smith shares her thoughts on social misunderstanding that surrounds domestic violence, the current service’s abilities to deal with domestic violence and the behaviour of perpetrators involved in domestic violence. The GHSH reforms were intended to improve

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responses to homelessness in NSW through changing service structure, and by improving planning and resource allocation. In doing so, domestic homelessness services were consolidated into a smaller number of service providers. This has resulted in larger organisations taking over locally run specialist organisations, including the Elsie Woman’s Refuge, which Smith has previously managed. The Elsie Women’s Refuge was the first women’s refuge in Australia that utilised a female perspective in helping women escape from domestic violence. It was established in 1974 by a group of women squatting in council houses, helping victims of domestic violence in the area. Last year it changed hands under the GHSH reforms from Domestic Violence NSW Service Management to St Vincent De Paul, a non-government, faith based service. Whilst the reforms have unified current services, these reforms also mark the end of Elsie Women’s Refuge as it was once known. Smith reflects on what happened to the Elsie Women’s Refuge after the GHSH reforms were put into place: “To have to hand the refuge over

to a faith-based organisation was really difficult. Even though the government has promised certain services will be run by women; the feminist philosophy that underpinned Elsie’s for its entire forty years looks to have been lost. All my staff, who were highly trained DV specialists, were made redundant last year.”

out. Women often think it is all too hard and that they won’t be able survive without their partner,” Smith said. Smith also expressed concerns about technology and the impact it has on clients trying to escape abusive partners. “There have been instances of GPS trackers in cars, leading people to the refuge.”

Gender politics is still an important part of the domestic violence problem. Smith strongly supports the idea that domestic violence is a misunderstood gender-based issue. Smith explains, “There can be simple responses where people have empathy around the victims instead of victim blaming. ‘Why didn’t she leave? Don’t walk in parks late at night’. Women are always taught to protect themselves. Why don’t we teach men not to do that to women?”

Smith also commented on the establishment of male-focused programs to end perpetrator behaviour in men. Smith supports the idea, but also identifies issues these programs face when trying to change behaviour associated with domestic violence, including the chance for perpetrator victimisation within them. “For someone to stop inflicting domestic violence they have to admit what they are doing. They have to take full responsibility and they have to show they want to actually make a change in their habits, which is rare”, Smith says.

Moreover, it is still widely misunderstood that victims can feel controlled and trapped in domestic situations. “Their friends don’t understand what they’re going through and turn on them because they’re not leaving. They have children with their partners, which makes them feel completely controlled and unable to break the cycle and get

Smith believes that the views of society and current policies in New South Wales still have a long way to go before the issue of domestic violence can be honestly and openly addressed.

News || 13

SPECIAL ISSUE: INDIGENOUS MATTERS

IN-MATES: AUSTRALIA’S RISKY PUNISHMENT SYSTEM FOR OUR TEENAGERS WORDS || KEZIA BROOKS

In Australia, questions continue to surface about the effectiveness of imprisoning youth, as opposed to offering rehabilitation programs outside of incarceration. In 2014 the CEO of North Australian Aboriginal Justice Agency, Priscilla Collins, said it costs more than $200,000 to imprison a young person for one year. The enormous expenditure is a loss not only to the Australian Government, but also to the rehabilitation and education of the imprisoned individual. In 2007 the Australian Institute of Criminology stated that more than half of the juveniles released from detention will be reconvicted within at least six months. This data suggests juveniles are not benefiting from time in prison; rather, they are more likely to reoffend. Indigenous youth are disproportionately affected by our prison system. The Australian Bureau of Statistics indicates that Indigenous people make up three per cent of our population, yet twenty-seven per cent of inmates are Indigenous. Most of these inmates were incarcerated as young teenagers for theft and/or drug crimes. Many Aboriginal youths that end up

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in juvenile detention miss out on fundamental education. Most do not complete high school, and this leads to a number of issues when it comes to future employment. Incarcerating youths simply sets them up for a life of struggle and, most likely, further crime. Kevin Rudd, Former Prime Minister, remarked at the seventh anniversary of his apology to the Stolen Generations that “Australia is now facing an Indigenous incarceration epidemic,” and urged politicians to do more to work toward reconciliation and community integration. Rather than offering community programs and rehabilitation for our Indigenous peoples, Australia has continued to favour incarceration. And at what cost? Currently, over ten per cent of prisoners report being violently assaulted. Teenagers jailed for petty offences are exposed to a world of crime throughout their sentence, forcing them to adopt survival instincts that remain with them long after their release. Over the years there has been much discussion about the effectiveness of community correction programs versus imprisonment.

The Productivity Commission reports that of those offenders who undertook community corrections, seven out of ten were completed. These programs, which may include drug treatment orders, community service programs, or home detention with behavioural management skills, are notably successful in educating and encouraging youth to engage positively in the community and personal development programs. Not only that, but these programs are considerably cheaper than incarcerating offenders.

socio-economic disadvantage that our mob have been in since colonisation.”

Former Indigenous Macquarie University student, Coen Tate, now living in an Aboriginal community in Coober Pedy, shares his thoughts on the issue: “Over fifty per cent of the juvenile detention population is Indigenous, and with the current government’s Indigenous Advancement Scheme cutting legal aid funding and clearly not prioritising effective programs of early intervention and justice reinvestment, those young people are being let into and left in a cycle of reoffending.

Australian prisons are currently running at more than 104 per cent of their actual capacity, and many inmates are likely to return to prison after being released. Governments are now being called upon to reevaluate the social and economic risks associated with incarcerating young offenders, and to reconsider the longterm investments of crime prevention and community-based intervention programs.

“This affects the mental and spiritual health of our young people, which leads to further entrapment in the cycle of

The Human Rights Law Centre is urging the government to fund community-based crime prevention services with the aim of addressing underlying causes of offences and preventing the long-term chance of reoffence. Senior lawyer Ruth Barson states, “We know that communitybased sentencing options can work better than prison and we know that early intervention is more effective and far less costly”.

As a nation, we should be tackling root issues of crime and aiming to rehabilitate offenders, rather than imprisoning and isolating people from education and opportunities for behaviour improvement.

News || 15

SPECIAL ISSUE: INDIGENOUS MATTERS

#ONEMOB UNITE FOR WA WORDS || MADI DAY

Aboriginal rights activists and supporters are standing up against the Australian Government’s plans to shut down up to 150 rural communities in Western Australia. After Western Australia’s Premier, Colin Barnett, stated that these homeland communities were “unviable”, protests broke out across the country. Prime Minister, Tony Abbott, only added to the outrage with his statement that taxpayers should no longer have to support the “lifestyle choices” of Aboriginal people. Rosalie Kunoth-Monks, Alyawar/Anmatyerr elder, actor, and activist, recently explained why living in homeland communities is far from a lifestyle choice in a conversation with Blackfulla Revolution, an Aboriginal run grassroots media group: “Homeland, for the Australian Aboriginal person, is absolutely your being. Where you’re at and where you’ve been for thousands of years ... dispossess the person from that and you become nothing.” Many Aboriginal people see forced closures of these communities as a continuation of colonisation, and are calling upon the government to ‘Stop The Genocide’. Nyoongar woman and human rights activist, Marianne McKay, said, “Taxpayers aren’t subsidising ‘lifestyle choices’. They are living on stolen money from stolen lands where people have been massacred and murdered”. Despite minimal coverage in the mainstream media, the resistance to community closures has a strong presence online. Trending hashtags, including #onemobunited, #sosblakaustralia and #lifestylechoices, have become prevalent on social media and are garnering international support. Indigenous groups worldwide, along with sports stars, academics, musicians and celebrities, are voicing their support for the cause.

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On ABC’s Q&A program last week, country musician Troy Cassar-Daley asked for an explanation regarding what the Western Australian government intends to do with the communities’ lands if they are vacated. Aboriginal activist groups such as Sovereign Union are pointing to proposals for mining projects in the Kimberley, an area where many communities are situated. Protests orchestrated by organisations such as Warriors of the Aboriginal Resistance and SOSBlackAustralia, have seen thousands of people take to the streets across the country. Cosmopolitan and rural locations alike showed their solidarity with rural communities facing closure, with interlinked rallies nationwide on Thursday 19 March. Many demonstrations, including the Matagurup (Heirsson Island) campaign and the Redfern Aboriginal tent embassies, continue a daily protest of the treatment of Aboriginal people despite the government’s attempts to evict them. The Nyoongar embassy on Heirsson Island is acting as a refugee camp for Aboriginal people in Western Australia made homeless by community closures. It is estimated that roughly 20,000 Aboriginal people will be homeless if the Western Australia government closes their communities. At the 13 March ‘Black Friday’ protests in Melbourne, organiser Meriki Onus expressed her concern for these people: “What can we do with 20,000 Aboriginal refugees? They can’t even go to the Aboriginal embassies because they’re getting shut down by the police in Perth … These Aboriginal people have nowhere to go within this society. Nowhere! You can’t live homeless on the streets in Perth. Do you know what they do to Blackfellas on the streets in Perth?”

The 2nd National Call to Action will be held on Friday, 1 May 2015.

REGULARS

CLASSIC MATES

YOU TAKING THE PISS, MATE? WORDS || ANNA GLEN Beer is the quintessential beverage you share with a mate. It is often said that Australia is a land characterised by ‘mateship’ and if beer is anything to go by, this cannot be denied. Australia has the fourth highest rate of consumption of beer per capita, and our former Prime Minister, Bob Hawke, holds the Guinness World Record for sculling over two pints of beer in eleven seconds. What follows is a guide to beer. A guide, in fact, to mateship.

Coopers – Your Best Mate

Fosters – Your Fake Mate

VB – Your Old Mate

Coopers is still run by the Coopers family and remains the only large scale, wholly owned Australian brewery. Thus, Coopers is your reliable friend. It’s like family, and will always have your back.

Fosters takes on the Australian identity, but beware, this friend is not what they seem. Fosters was initially a loyal buddy, exported for the first time to Australian soldiers during the Boer War. Alas, times have changed. These days Fosters is rarely seen on home soil but can be found gallivanting across England. Fosters has become so popular there, it is now the second highest selling lager in Britain.

Your friendship with this friend is built on the fact you have known each other for so long. You may have nothing in common, but what you do have is history and a comfortable familiarity. This is the essence of VB, because it might not be to your taste but it has been around long enough to warrant some affection. It’s average, but it’s also unpretentious and easy enough to drink.

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NEW MATES

Grapeshot spoke to James, a bartender from Dove & Olive pub in Surry Hills, about craft beer to gain a little insight into some of the new kids on the block.

Ale Pacino – Your Creative Mate

Yulli’s Fat Nerd – Your Dark and Mysterious Mate

Stone & Wood Pacific Ale – Your New Best Mate

Say hello to my little friend, Ale Pacino. This friend likes to collaborate and is always coming up with new ideas, whether it’s decorating the house, or for that new screenplay you’re writing together. This creativity can be seen in Ale Pacino, which combines “two different types of Malts (Ale and Carapils) and two different types of hops (Centennial and Citra)” to create what James calls “a delicious beer with fruity citrus notes, a smooth mouth feel, and bitter finish”.

Yulli’s Fat Nerd is dark and mysterious on the outside, but nice and sweet on the inside. A fan of dark beers, James says Fat Nerd is his favourite because it gives a “fantastic mouthful of toasty, sweet and fruity chocolate, packed with a huge vanilla essence hit”. Fat Nerds can be hard to find, but can you usually discover them chilling out at Dove & Olive, Keg & Brew or at Yulli’s in Surry Hills.

This is a new person in your life you have instantaneously clicked with. They tend to appear in your early twenties when high school friends are beginning to disappear. If you feel like a change in brew, Stone & Wood has all the qualities of a new best friend. According to James, Stone & Wood has “made a name for itself as one of Australia’s best craft beers” and was the winner of Dove & Olive’s very first Craft Beer Fight.

Regulars || 19

RECLAIMING THE WOG WORDS || VANESSA CAPITO

There’s more to the word ‘wog’ than homemade sausage and making your own grappa.

20 || Regulars

Recently, I overheard a guy proclaim to his mate that he’s allowed to call people wogs because his mates are wogs. He continued, explaining that it’s totally cool these days, and is no longer offensive. While a little piece of my brain exploded, I refrained from kicking his shins and yelling at him for being wrong. Which he was. As a wog, I’m allowed to say it, and as far as I’m concerned, so are all my other wog counterparts. If you aren’t a wog, then, you can’t say it. Unfortunately, a lot of people (not everyone) seem to misunderstand what the term ‘wog’ actually means, and what it implied in the past. According to the Macquarie Dictionary, the word ‘wog’ originated in the 1920s as British slang for Indians. Australian soldiers in the Middle East picked it up in WWII and brought it home, where it was applied to post-war migrants – many of whom came from Southern Europe.

Being beaten, humiliated and having a broken arm is what the word ‘wog’ meant to my nonno. Urban Dictionary defines a wog as the following: Basically, anyone with an olive complexion. They usually dress in expensive clothes and mafia wogs are often found wearing suits. Mostly drive souped up cars like skylines and wrx's usually with a stolen sound system. And puts it into context as: Wog 1 “ey bro lets go to maccaz and pick up some hot chicks.” Wog 2 “alright but we gotta go to my bros so i can get my new subs for my turbo.” Wog 1 “watta fucking sik kunttttt.”

But fuck Urban Dictionary (obviously). Both of my parents were born in Australia. Their parents, my nonni were from the same small town, Delianuova, in Italy’s southern region of Calabria. They played in the same town marching band; my dad’s dad played the trombone, and my mum’s dad was the roadie. Cute, huh? They migrated from Italy to Australia by boat in the 1950s and settled in Melbourne. When my nonni first migrated here, it wasn’t easy for them. Not only did they face an enormous

language barrier, they also had to overcome an even bigger cultural barrier. For the most part, the Italian community, commonly referred to as the paesani (the Italian equivalent of ‘homies’) stuck together. They worked together, ate together, and married each other. They had Sauce Day, where they’d spend all day making pasta sauce from scratch out of my nonno’s garage. They also had Sausage Day, which was dedicated to making homemade salami. Ican even recall my nonno buying pork and horse meat from his local butcher (yes, I’m cringing just as much as you are right now) to make his own mortadella. I think he only stopped because the butcher stopped selling it. Needless to say, they were the real wog deal. But back then, there was more to being a wog than homemade sausage and making your own grappa. My nonni, and to some extent my own parents, were heavily ridiculed for their heritage. They were constantly turned down for work because they didn’t speak the language, and simply because the growing wog stereotype made them seem untrustworthy. Despite being an incredibly skilled carpenter, it was too difficult for my nonno to find work, so he created his fortune by starting his own business. It wasn’t just intangible ridicule and discrimination that affected my family. Once, my nonno on my mum’s side was followed by a group of three young Australian men. They pestered him for his wallet and made fun of his broken English and accent. When my nonno refused them, they began to beat him, calling him a “filthy wog” and a “useless mongrel” and told him to go back to where he came from. Being beaten, humiliated and having a broken arm is what the word ‘wog’ meant to my nonno. By and large, it’s also what it means to me. It’s offensive, and doesn’t hold any nice connotations. When someone who isn’t of the same background says it, I can’t help but think, “Do you really know what you’re saying? Do you know what my family, and many others went through?” Usually, they don’t. When I say the word to my family or my other wog friends it’s okay, because we understand each other and where we came from. At one point, we were all outsiders.

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IF YOU TRY TO CARRY HER, YOU BOTH WILL FALL. WORDS || DUKE FRANCIS

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We all encounter mental illness at some point in our lives. Sometimes we find it within ourselves, and at other times, our loved ones. And there’s no disputing the fact that mental disorders are hard to truly identify, let alone treat. Louis Theroux gave some excellent advice about seeking psychological treatment, comparing it to putting your car in for maintenance. I know, on face value, it sounds crude – but it’s true. There is nothing to be ashamed of, and this culture of stoicism we have built up ultimately causes more damage than healing. There’s nothing wrong with monitoring your wellbeing. It’s like a check-up at the GP for your mind. Being supportive is key, but I think that’s a truism we don’t really have to discuss. It’s the ways in which you provide support that defines how helpful you can be. I want to tell you a short anecdote that highlights my experience with mental illness, and perhaps you can learn from some of my mistakes. My ex-girlfriend had a bipolar disorder. I don’t want to dwell too long on her symptoms, because there’s no value there. But I suppose I should tell you that some days she would be plagued by an inexplicable and impenetrable sadness. And this sadness manifested itself in a frustrating indifference (frustrating for both of us sometimes!), lacklustre, anger, silence, and neediness. We were eighteen years old and I had never experienced such intensity. On the worst nights I would drive to her house at 2am for reasons even I couldn’t explain. Other times we would speak on the phone for hours, without resolving anything. The entire thing was Sisyphean. And here is where I don’t want you to misinterpret what I’m saying: I made myself too available for her. By spending all my energy trying to keep her happy, I avoided the elephant in the room. I wasn’t the solution; I was the anaesthetic.

My presence, or whatever it was she found in me, provided temporary relief from the ongoing depression. What I mean to say is that becoming somebody’s anchor isn’t equivalent to standing on the shoulders of giants. If you try to carry her, you will both fall.

She found the idea of seeing somebody to discuss issues neither of us really believed existed as pretty repellent. It came in waves. She would, without warning, bloom into her usual cheery self, and then some. The happy swings – believe it or not – were often more frightening than the sadness. When she was sad, it felt so honest and concrete, and we made real human connection. But the happiness was something else. It seemed artificial, intoxicating, delusional. It truly upsets me to say that. But it’s the truth. She wasn’t diagnosed for ages. She found the idea of seeing somebody to discuss issues neither of us really believed existed as pretty repellent. And I suppose, in retrospect, it’s hard to justify why you wait so long before suggesting they seek help. The wake-up call happened right before Christmas. I knew she was incredibly depressed that evening, but I had work and I couldn’t see her. She tried to commit suicide that night. I think she was on the phone right before it happened, because her friend found her at home with both wrists cut. After seeing a psychiatrist she made immense improvements. She started surfing again, got a job, moved into her own apartment, and travelled around Australia for a bit. I know these seem like small accomplishments, but they are miles away from where she was before. So never be afraid to suggest the hard realities to a mate. It might be exactly what they need.

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IS CATCALLING INNOCUOUS? WORDS || STEFANIE COSTI

We’ve all heard stories about women being catcalled. Often women are told to simply ignore it, or take it as a compliment. Perhaps you have been given this advice before. But if you understood how uncomfortable it is to be the victim of leering and inappropriate gestures, you wouldn’t be so blasé about it. Catcalling is a form of harassment. New research from the Australia Institute shows eighty-seven per cent of Australian women have been victims of street harassment, and one in ten have to put up with it on a regular basis. Did you know that one third of Australian women experience their first incident of street harassment before their fifteenth birthday? Unfortunately, society seems to place the onus of avoiding harassment on women, instead of teaching people that harassment, including catcalling, is wrong. As soon as girls hit adolescence, they are told to conform to certain rules. At school, girls are taught to cover their shoulders, and make sure skirts reach a certain length. Later, your body will be picked apart by strangers. They’ll tell you that your butt is too big, or too small. You’re not wearing enough makeup, or you’re wearing too much. The Crimes Act will dictate what constitutes rape. You will constantly be jumping through an infinite number of hoops in order to be perceived as a woman. Follow the rules. Make sure you do this, but you never do that. You have to dress nicely, but best not kick up a fuss when someone drives past you and yells out “nice butt”. Remember, that’s a compliment. Except it’s not.

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Let me tell you why this is not a compliment. Catcalling, even though it may not involve anything physical, is a type of harassment. It’s an invasion of your personal space analogous to your employer touching your backside near the photocopier.

It makes you feel uncomfortable and often enraged. It’s not enjoyable to be honked at. Catcalling often happens in passing, and it usually comes from a stranger. That means there is no time to confront the perpetrator. After a woman recovers from the shock it is too late to respond. They’re probably gone. Women will look to modifying their own behaviour in order to avoid this type of harassment. But where should the line be drawn? No makeup? Or dresses? A longer route to work, or stop walking to work altogether? Unfortunately, even after modifying their behaviour, many women still experience street harassment. It happens because you are female, and therefore an object for scrutiny. It is clear, then, that instead of asking women to change their behaviour, society should be taught that catcalling is harassment, and harassment is wrong. It needs to stop. I think I can speak for most women when I say that catcalls are not complimentary. They are not something that makes you animatedly gossip with your friends. It makes you feel uncomfortable and often enraged. It’s not enjoyable to be honked at. If you really, so desperately want our attention, do it the old fashioned way and introduce yourself like any respectful person would.

ADVICE FROM

FAKE KATH & KIM WORDS || REGINA FEATHERSTONE

Hi Kath & Kim, I need your advice! Uni is so stressful and I’m thinking of deferring or just dropping out. What do you think I should do? Rachel. Kim: Is Kyle Sandilands stupid? Is Larry Emdur stupid? Because they’ve never been to university and look how successful they are. For that matter I’ve never been to uni and look at me, I’ve got a mobile phone, a dvd player and a job where my boss loves me. He loves me that much he tells me not to come in half the time because he knows how much I need to relax. I’m going to keep this brief because my nail lady said no heavy labour and I don’t want my nails chipping. Everyone is always at me to do stuff. Mum, Sharon, Brett and even my best friend Tina needs me for her hair eisteddfods. You can’t do everything for everyone, as I have learnt. Look after yourself because God knows no one else is thinking of you. And look, you have options if you don’t want to go to uni anymore. If you are a hornbag like me you can become a trophy wife. But you have to work hard at it. It’s not all sipping Chardonnay and parties. I’ll leave you with a tip so you don’t look like a bloody fool, chardonnay is French so it’s pronounced ‘Cardonnay’.

Kath: Okay, Rachel, now look at me. Look-atmeeeyyyy. I’ve got one word to say to you, get real tout suite. University may be hard, but I’ll tell you what’s harder – struggling in life. I had to make do when Kim was born after her father left me and I didn’t have anything to fall back on. Yes I had my looks and my parrot earrings but sometimes you need more. Don’t you want to be effluent? Let me tell you, it’s hard to be effluent when there’s no real money coming in. I have a good income now with Kel’s wage as well, and we do all kinds of noice things. We go on mystery flights, we go out to special dinners like Chinese. It’s noice. You know what else I’m thinking? Maybe you need some pump. You know, pump and pilates? I think you’ll feel better when you feel like more of a hornbag. You’re not a crim if you want to keep yourself trim. Or maybe you need a hobby. Might I suggest a floral design course? It has its stresses let me tell you but it’s noice to be creative and express yourself. University is noice, it’s different…it’s unusual. Pop on some footy franks, grab some Tia Maria and celebrate your own ability. You are woman, hear you roar.

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STUDENT VOICE WORDS || VANESSA CAPITO

WHAT DOES THE WORD ‘MATE’ MEAN TO YOU? The word ‘mate’ has a lot of different meanings within Australian culture, and is probably one of our top colloquialisms. Either as a reference to a friend, or using it in a way to let someone know they need chill – “Alright, mate”. Grapeshot took to campus to find out what the word ‘mate’ means to you.

Joseph, 20 – Bachelor of Arts “I think mate can mean a lot of things but I guess I used it most to talk about the boys, like my friends if we’re joking around. And if someone is your mate, as in a good mate, it means they’re loyal”.

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Madeline, 22 – Bachelor of Law and Commerce

Laura, 20 – Bachelor of Media and Law

“I think the word ‘mate’ is inherently Australian. You don’t really hear it being used anywhere else as often as you do in Australia. It’s quite present even in Australian television. But it’s used a lot, especially in everyday banter between people. My boss even called a leading tax lawyer at my work mate. Her response was ‘Haha, get me my file’ ”.

“I usually use the word mate when I’m being sarcastic. Like, ‘mate, settle down’ or ‘your mate’ or something like that. I don’t use it that often but it’s pretty Australian and it can mean almost anything depending on your tone. And it’s basically in any meme that’s has something to do with Australia”.

FEATURES

THE HAPPY BUTCHER:

AN APPRENTICE’S EXPERIENCE OF MATESHIP, DRUGS, AND OTHER SECRETS OF THE TRADE. WORDS || TOBY HEMMINGS

ight before Nate quit his job as an apprentice butcher, he was subject to the antics of his drugabusing, lazy, ill-tempered, and rarely-smiling manager, Francis. A rumour floated around the butchery: Francis was reaching into the till to fund his drug addiction. One quiet Thursday night, when the business was dead, Francis invited Nate behind the meatchopping station and told him to ‘pull a stool’. Francis was in a shit mood, coming down from cocaine. He whacked Nate over the head. It was a mighty hit, both unreasonable and confronting. During Francis’ management, the shop lost ninety per cent of their regular clientele. Not long after Nate quit, Francis lost his job. But a rumour soon emerged: apparently Francis had moved to Harris Farm, and was quickly fired for stealing. “Butchers love to gossip,” Nate said. On the surface, we all trust businesses to do the right thing by us, and there are few professionals that conjure this mental image like butchers. We think of an older, jolly man, wearing the classic navy and

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white-striped apron. He is more Santa Claus than Sweeney Todd. But does this image of the trustworthy and friendly local purveyor of fine meats hold value in our contemporary society? Or is a paradigm shift occurring, as our fast-paced society, driven by consumerism, efficiency, and profit margins, adds to the pressure? Are the people who work in butcheries as likeable and trusted as they portray themselves to be, or have these stereotypes been replaced with cheaper offcuts? At age fourteen, he started working as a cashier, which involved ‘charming the customers’ while serving them their meat. Out back, his cleaning tasks were decidedly grim. Nate cleaned the enormous circular bone saw. When opened, there was a day’s worth of grindings and residue coalesced into a pink pulp waiting to be scraped out. Nate admitted that the work itself is thankless and tough, but the people who work behind closed doors define the job. Entering the workforce at such a young age meant Nate quickly identified and assumed his place in the hierarchy. Apprentices, of course, are the lowest

in the chain, treated and paid poorly, given terrible hours – the butt of every joke. But more importantly, they had to treat those higher in the hierarchy with respect. One slow afternoon, Nate was horsing around with a colleague. He threw a dirty rag in the butcher’s face. Enraged, the butcher met Nate out back and delivered some deadly intimidating words: “The only reason I’m not beating you is because I know your mother”. Nate’s first manager, Jerry, was an “absolute hero”. It was under Jerry’s wings that Nate learnt the tricks of the trade. But the Christmas hours and incredible pressure were unkind to Jerry. He ingested speed at work, on the job, to cope with the workload. For around two months, he worked gruelling hours, sometimes between 4:30am and 9:30pm. While the culture of drug use was widespread, it wasn’t necessarily condoned. Nate admits that “managers encouraged camaraderie over supervision”. Nate’s skills ranged from determining freshness – ‘quality control’, they called it – by sniffing the meat as he slides it into the bag, to the best methods of meat rotation. “So we were an upscale butcher, and didn’t use preservatives. For example, wholesalers and abattoirs would deliver pigs out back and the butchers would get to work on them. From there, the life expectancy of meat is so variable. It depends how long it’s been in the window or the cool room. And once we’ve wrapped and sliced it, the life expectancy declines again. Unpreserved meat eventually turns brown. After a few days, we would rotate the meat and cover them in marinade.” And then there’s ‘butcherspeak,’ a crude but universal vernacular used by butchers to assess meat quality and talk shit to each other, all in the sight of the public. Butcherspeak functions like a kind of bastardised ‘Pig Latin’ (try to decipher the meaning of ckuffing on doog teanuk). The butchers introduced Nate to weed and would often shout him drinks after work. “We were a clique ... we would drink beers, smoke weed, go fishing, and throw our catches back into the water. A fellow apprentice tried to sell me weed before extending

the invitation even further, by offering to make me a dealer. “The drinking culture is rampant, sure, but they don’t drink much on the job. Having a beer is not uncommon, but getting tanked doesn’t happen.” The same psychology applies to the more discreet use of amphetamines. The butchery maintained a climate where it wasn’t necessarily frowned upon, but neither was it encouraged. It simply existed. Nate associates this mentality with the desire to break the monotony of the day-to-day, because “sometimes we’re bored as fuck behind those counters”. Everybody understood that, in the shop, the liberties and privileges of mateship, were conditional to their ongoing performance.

“The only reason I’m not beating you is because I know your mother”. Work ethic always came first. “If you weren’t prepared to put your head down and do some fucking work, you wouldn’t last.” But there’s no denying that the line between work and play was a thin tightrope. Returning locals were the crux of keeping the business healthy and thriving. “Doing your job at a high standard is a point of pride,” Nate said. Certain customers would request their favourite butcher, while others would seek advice for recipes. Many just wanted a happy-go-lucky conversation to accompany their roast dinner plans. At this point, I want to disclaim that Nate’s experience does not speak for meat industry as a whole. However, his story does illuminate the simple fact that things occur behind closed doors that we may not consider. Mateship is more complex than smiles and handshakes. There are unspoken codes and hierarchies that govern relationships. Nevertheless, it is a real, tangible concept that binds us together. Nate worked as a Christmas casual at the butchery last year. Francis was gone, but Jerry had returned – this time as a butcher, not a manager. There were new faces and new management. The environment had changed; something, a connection, had been irretrievably lost.

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WE’RE NOT BIRDS! HOW OUR CIVILISATION HAS FOSTERED A CULTURE OF DIETARY SUICIDE THAT PALEO WON’T FIX. WORDS || JACK CAMERON STANTON

n a recent article published by The Guardian, writer Jason Wilson denounces Pete Evans’ paleo diet by saying, “Paleo isn’t a fad, it’s a cult that selectively denies the modern world”. While Wilson’s judgement is too harsh, in my opinion, he does make a very good point. Why has modernity suddenly been seized by an ideology that prides itself on regression? For the unaware, the philosophical spine of paleo is that humanity’s diet reached optimum nutritional value during the Palaeolithic period. It dictates that we must refrain from eating anything unavailable or evaded by Palaeolithic man, such as grains, legumes, dairy, processed oils, and refined sugar. Let’s ignore the fact that the era in question sprawled across many centuries and cannot be compartmentalised into strict dietary guidelines. And let’s also ignore evidence like archaeological research which proves legumes and grains were consumed during the Paleo era. What’s more important is that by doing so – dismissing reality, that is – we are being consistent with the trend. By perpetuating ignorance, paleo enthusiasts can construct a fabricated sense of legion. A sad reality, however, is that obesity has become the suicidal pandemic of our times. Even worse, obesity has boomed in the last forty years, and shows

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no signs of deceleration. So if ‘fad diets’ do deter obesity are they really that damaging? And is paleo really a fad diet or a sustainable lifestyle? I spoke with Frank Marino, Professor of Exercise Physiology at Charles Sturt University, about whether paleo has a verifiable scientific core, or if it’s merely another ideological fever plaguing our vain society. The merits of paleo, according to Professor Marino, are a truism we already know. “What paleo does is removes all the processed carbohydrates from a diet and replaces them with natural food that includes a higher fat content.” So when you substitute sugar, two things happen: your body stops storing fat; and you eat less, reducing your overall calorie intake.

“When you enter Woolies, you should only shop in the fruit and vegetables, meat counter, and dairy shelves. The rest of the shop will kill you very slowly.” In other words, “If you adhere to paleo to reduce the amount of processed food in your diet, then it’s a good thing. But as a cure-all, a panacea, it’s a recipe for disaster”. I imagine it’s logical to tailor our diets according to biological predisposition rather than the philosophies of celebrity chefs like Pete Evans. Evans’ newest publication, Bubba Yum Yum Yum:

The Paleo Way, originally due for Australian release in April this year, was abandoned by publishing house Pan Macmillan in response to condemnation by leading medical professionals. Even zealous sycophants must wince at this media defeat. The recipe most under fire is the controversial bone broth, prescribed for infants instead of baby formula. When discovered that the broth holds ten times the recommended Vitamin A levels, and is therefore potentially lethal, Pan Macmillan didn’t want a bar of it. With naïve (and maybe predictable) bigotry, Evans announced that his cookbook would be selfpublished digitally, ignoring professional warning. It’s not the first time somebody defined themselves as a ‘warrior’ for their cause and charged right ahead, disregarding the voices crying out otherwise. His bigheadedness fits the Upton Sinclair Theory: “it is difficult to get a man to understand something when his salary depends upon him not understanding it”. So I suppose the trouble is that people revere the words of Pete Evans, almost religiously. But does that qualify as a cult? In his book, The Paleo Answer, Loren Cordain identifies the problems with eating beans and legumes. He uses anecdotes, vague physiological deductions, and surface value anthropology to conclude that legumes can cause inflammation and cramps in the gut. Therefore, a total and swift departure from legumes is our only recourse, right? “If birds can’t digest seeds and legumes, then what chance do humans have? That’s the reasoning. And it’s flawed, on so many levels. The obvious flaw is: we’re not birds!” Professor Marino added some startling statistics that may force you to reconsider your current eating habits. “The Inuit’s staple diet for thousands of years was seal fat. And the Pima Indians ate dried bison meat covered in fat as a preservative. They were the most handsome people on the planet, until the white man arrived. So we have to ask ourselves – after millions of years of evolution, we did very well. But in the last forty years, we’ve done poorly.” We know late onset diabetes emerged as a significant health problem around the 1900s. Studies show that in the 1700s a person’s average sugar consumption in the United Kingdom was four kilograms per year. By the 1960s, the figure had

jumped to around fifty kilograms in the U.S.A. Today, we consume about seventy-five kilograms and the prevalence of diabetes is roughly seven in every one hundred people. “It’s not quite clear if obesity causes diabetes, or if people predisposed to diabetes get fat, as the body’s way of staving off the disease.” Most people don’t realise it, but at any given time your blood sugar level is five grams. Yet you might drink a 600ml bottle of Coke and inject an additional sixty grams into your bloodstream. That means your body fights to breakdown sixty-five grams of sugar. But it’s built to do that, so it channels excess to your liver, stores it as fat, and tells you everything is fine. But really, it isn’t. “When you enter Woolies, you should only shop in the fruit and vegetables, meat counter, and dairy shelves. The rest of the shop will kill you very slowly.” Like the legumes argument, paleo’s rationale for not eating dairy is archaic and naïve. Cordain’s assumption that dairy can cause cancer is a leap of faith, at best. Professor Marino comments: “The only people who should exclude dairy are those with biological aversion – those missing enzymes and god-knows-what-else – preventing growth of correct bacteria to digest lactose”. In a growing climate of nutritional indifference and factual fallacies, how can we be sure we are securing our body’s needs? With so many theories and counterarguments, it appears a titanic endeavour to figure out what to do. And the frustrating answer is: it depends on you. Any diet promoting exclusion of a food group should be treated with scepticism. Even the endearing Food Pyramid, taught in primary school and once inscribed on every cereal box, is faulty, having developed from years of economic and political intrigue rather than honest nutrition. This is just one example of something presented to me as an empirical fact, something I’m supposed to immediately acknowledge and accept, only to be destroyed by later research. The pyramid was a complete failure, since adhering to it in fact made us sick. I’m not disputing that our society needs to change. That’s obvious. But, we do not need to exclude foods so bashfully. What we really need to do is grasp the physiology of our food, not its history.

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PARADOX OF AUSTRALIAN MATESHIP BY PULLING EVERYONE TOGETHER WE ARE TEARING PEOPLE APART. WORDS || ALICIA SCOTT

he mythical idea of mateship really developed with Australia’s World War One diggers. It is thought to have originated from the camaraderie of the convicts on their journey to Australia; an abbreviation of ‘shipmate’. Today, we like to think that our culture, the culture of ‘mateship’, is defined by values like giving everybody ‘a fair go’. But with so many different groups of people making up modern day Australia, the sweeping generalisation of ‘a fair go’ seems at odds with our reality. That is the paradox of Australian mateship: we claim to embrace equality, when really, many of our policies actually work against the notion. We continue to deny equality, and even basic rights, to many groups, including women, those who identify as LGBTQIA+, refugees, and Indigenous Australians. Moo Baulch, CEO of Domestic Violence NSW, recently shared, “If you conform to the nice shallow version of what a ‘mate’ is then that’s great. As soon as you start thinking below that surface you realise Australians can be incredibly sexist, incredibly racist, and incredibly homophobic”. Despite making up half of the population, women are still considered unequal to men in what is still a patriarchal society. Figures from the Australian

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Bureau of Statistics reveal that the gender pay gap is the highest it has been in over twenty years, reaching a record 18.8 per cent. The average full-time male worker earns $1,587.50 per week, while the average female worker scrapes in $300 less than her male counterpart. Women’s representative for the Macquarie University Student Advisory Board, Ellie Sanderson, finds this trend disturbing. “I think the problem feminism is facing now is a lot of people – including women – think we have achieved equality. They say that if the gap continues to get smaller at the [current] rate, it will take over seveny-five years before we reach parity.” The lack of representation of women in a conservative Federal Government perpetuates the acceptability of male dominance in Australian society. Sanderson noted, “I remember when they announced the cabinet reshuffle and Tony Abbott proudly worded it as ‘we now have double the amount of women in cabinet’ and it’s like … that’s two women, dude. No one is patting you on the back”. In a similar vein, Macquarie University student, Sam Farrell, who identifies with the LGBTQIA+ community, has suffered. She explains, “I travel a long way to university every day. If I am sitting on

the carriage and there is only me and another man, I am way more aware of my surroundings than if it was just a woman … If the patriarchy didn’t exist, women wouldn’t feel scared to walk around at night by themselves either”. The LGBTQIA+ community make up a significant part of Australia’s population, yet they are often faced with harmful discrimination caused by Government attitudes and policies. A 2014 poll, conducted on behalf of Australian Marriage Equality, found that seventy-two per cent of Australians support the legalisation of same-sex marriage. Liberal Democrat Senator, David Leyonhjelm, is set to introduce the Freedom to Marry Bill into parliament, which is expected to bring the issue to the forefront of political debate.

That is the paradox of Australian mateship: we claim to embrace equality, when really, many of our policies actually work against the notion. An increasing number of Liberal ministers, including Malcolm Turnbull and Arthur Sinodinos, have publicly voiced their support for same-sex marriage. Yet outspoken conservative MPs, such as Social Services Minister, Scott Morrison, continue to hinder progress towards a more equal Australia.

Farrell confesses, “I have been in a situation, it was after the Mardi Gras, and about six or seven men came onto the train and started beating up [these gay] men at the other end of the carriage. My friend and I escaped because it was terrifying. Even at an event where LGBTQIA+ people are meant to feel welcomed, they still come under attack”. Women and the LGBTQIA+ community are not the only groups in Australia excluded from the apparently selective notion of ‘mateship’. It is clear that Australia’s ingrained racism towards Indigenous Australians, refugees and immigrants stems from this problematic, Anglo-centric notion. The prevalence of racism in our culture can be evidenced in all sectors of society, even in our politicians – it was only recently that our Prime Minister called Indigenous communities a “lifestyle choice”. Dimity Shillingsworth, a member of the Waka Waka and Biri Gubba tribes said, “Within our culture we are supposed to take care of the land we belong to. So displacing people from the community and their country will result in a disconnection to spirituality which will lead to a lot of issues. It’s sad, because a lot of people in remote communities still live sustainably off the land. It’s not just their home it’s the part of the country they belong to, and where theirs ancestors lived.”

Echoing the Australian Christian Lobby, Morrison insists that heterosexual marriages set up the best opportunities for a child to flourish. Even if we ignore the extensive research that contradicts Morrison’s argument, it is hypocritical for him to claim he is concerned about the welfare of children when, as Immigration Minister, he was in charge of systematically keeping refugee children in horrific detention centres and denying them basic human rights.

Although Australia prides itself on being a multicultural society, Farrell recalls her friends’ experiences with inherent racism, which is perpetuated on an everyday basis by the idea that Australia’s default ethnicity is ‘white’.

While the prospect of legalising same-sex marriage may not resonate with some Australians, it would help foster a sense of inclusion with the LGBTQIA+ community and rectify their ongoing disaffection. Farrell finds it difficult to relate to the typical Australian aesthetic and has had firsthand experience of the divisiveness present in Australia.

With almost three quarters of Australians in support of same-sex marriage, and over eighty per cent of Australians supporting recognition of Aboriginal and Torres-Strait Islander people in the nation’s constitution, it is evident that Australians’ attitudes are progressively shifting towards a more equal and unprejudiced society. With that said, the current conservative government must reassess their priorities to reflect the overwhelming public sentiment if they truly believe in ‘a fair go’.

“I cannot identify with that myth at all. Whenever I hear someone say ‘a fair go’ they are generally white, heterosexual males … I’m quite confident and don’t always present as gay, but if I am with some people who obviously look gay I feel myself being treated differently by society,” she discloses.

“My friends of colour always get asked ‘where are you from? No no, where are you from?’ People don’t ask me where I’m from, despite being first generation Australian on my mother’s side,” Farrell explains.

Sanderson declares, “It’s not enough just to say, ‘Okay yes I support equality’; let’s think about what we can do about it”.

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THE AUSSIE ACCENT EMBARGO: YOU CALL THAT AN ACCENT? THIS IS AN ACCENT! WORDS || REGINA FEATHERSTONE

rocodile Dundee has a lot to answer for after convincing the rest of the world we call prawns ‘shrimps’. Paul Hogan’s character has, in an equally misleading fashion, creasted the ‘tough’ and ‘blokey’ Australian stereotype. Whether we like it or not, our accent in film is synonymous with crocodile wrestling, surf rescue, and bush rangers. This hero narrative, this mythology of generalisation, is something we have created ourselves. Despite many Australian actors ‘making it big’ in Hollywood, we don’t often hear our accent in film, although we did witness Robert Downey Jr’s woeful attempts in Natural Born Killers and the modern classic Tropical Thunder (you tried, Iron Man). But seriously, why is the Australian accent excluded in blockbusters? And do Mick Dundee’s bleached roots have anything to do with it? Karen Pearlman, former President of the

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Australian Screen Editors Guild and Macquarie University Screen Production lecturer, explained that we don’t hear the Australian accent because it’s not part of the norm. Someone like Nicole Kidman, for example, will adopt an American voice because the Hollywood industry seeks to reinforce its norm. These conditions exist to consolidate popularity and deliver consistency. “The product needs to be standard, complete with the hero’s journey, certain action quota, and sexual banter to meet audience expectations.” Pearlman adds: “when I first saw Mad Max, it was dubbed into American to make it less difficult [to understand].” It seems as if international films use the Australian accent to signify otherness. Since the American accent is the norm, any departure reminds the audience of stereotypes previously

represented in other box-office films. It’s hard for us to rise above the bush brute archetype, recently perpetuated by Hugh Jackman in the creatively titled Australia. Aussie actor/visual buffet, Chris Hemsworth, has even admitted he couldn’t use his homegrown voice when acting as Thor because people would think “That’s Crocodile Dundee!” Russell Crowe successfully shed the ocker stereotype by using a strong Aussie accent in films like Gladiator and Master & Commander, but, it begs the question: why haven’t we heard our accent more since then? In Exodus: Gods and Kings, Joel Edgerton uses a British accent to portray the ancient Egyptian/Hebrew tale. Really, if the intention was to be historically accurate, Edgerton should’ve spoken the language of the times. But time and time again Hollywood proves that, on their agenda, validity is secondary to entertainment and familiarity. Instead of accurate portrayal, Edgerton reflects the generic British Caucasian, the traditional Hollywood way of narrating epic and historical stories. An Aussie accent would’ve sounded no more jarring than a British one, and certainly have been less out of place than Edgerton’s awful, Kardashian-inspired tan.

“perhaps we don’t fully understand our own accent or accept the way it can be used in different context.” Linguistically, our language can be divided into three sections: the cultivated (Cate Blanchett); the general (Julia Gillard); and the broad (Steve Irwin or Fitzy & Wippa). There is no reason why cultivated Australian accents can’t be interchangeable with British ones. I proposed the idea to Pearlman that Australian accents in film can be a stylistic decision by directors as signifiers of a particular stereotypical character. She claimed this idea was too broad to apply. It can be said, however, that directors like Neil Bloomkamp (District 9) employ specific accents to convey tougher characters. A good example of this is Hugh

Jackman’s villainous character in Chappie. In film interviews, Jackman claimed the script used sayings he’d never heard of, and he was intentionally broadening his ocker accent. Similarly, strong South African accents are used to affect toughness in the likes of Copley’s Elysium. While Hollywood only ever embraces a small part of the Australian accent, Pearlman suggests the Australian film industry isn’t much better. Films like Kenny, Animal Kingdom, and even The Castle are thematically alike: white-centric and not confronting. What we see on our screen doesn’t always reflect the multiculturalism of our country. I acknowledge there are films that cover minority experiences – like Anh Do’s Footy Legends – but rarely do they become roaring commercial successes. Pearlman adds that perhaps we don’t fully understand our own accent or accept the way it can be used in different contexts, such as city-to-city, or suburb-to-suburb. Many successful Australian actors in Hollywood swap their accents for an American accent in order to comply with the norm. Sometimes, a few non-Australian actors will attempt to adopt the Australian accent, and fail spectacularly (I’m looking at you, Tarantino, for the end of Django Unchained ... what the hell was that?) However, it does seem that the Aussie accent has enjoyed an increase in American film, with characters like Rose Byrne in Bad Neighbours and Maybe a change will happen and we will hear more authentic accents coming from actors in mainstream films. Doing so would help to shake up the tired Hollywood formula, not just for Australians, but for everyone. While Crocodile Dundee may have cast a big, animal-skinned shadow over our accent for years, regular Aussie accents and characters are emerging in film. It will be a slow paradigm shift, away from taboo and toward normality. Hopefully we see diversity in our representation by Australian cinema and – dare I say it – television shows.

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GOT SOMETHING TO CONTRIBUTE? SEND IT OUR WAY AT grapeshot@mq.edu.au Submissions for ISSUE 4: WANDER close 24 APRIL 2015

36 || Features

CREATIVE

BETWEEN FRIENDS WORDS || CAMERON COLWELL

...Is it the wine, or has he always been so goodlooking? Sneaking glances across the blackwood beer-bottle watermarked table, I watch Tom, his silver rings glinting on pale fingers as he tries out chopsticks. It takes him a few tries, but eventually he has a piece of teriyaki chicken lifted up before him. I know I’m deep into one thing or other; that’s the only way I can make sense of the envy I feel as he drops it into his mouth.

Steady, Will. In the end he’s just one of thousands of arty boys with a pair of Doc Martens and a passable jawline. But I keep catching my attention drifting away from the good-humoured dinner conversation about how nice this Japanese restaurant is with its red lantern-lights and iPad menus and view of our street. It’s a cool, navy-coloured evening, a little bit of drizzle out there. The light boxes of the poster stores, vintage outfitters, and happy herb supplier’s cast a smeary double of the suburban street.

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Settle. We are here to have fun. Let the past visit only in casual intimacy and in-jokes. Sometime around the time we’re talking about payment Tom looks back, and something slips. “I think I need to get cash out,” he says, ignoring offers of payment for the group’s Prodigal Son. “There’s an ATM just up the street,” I say. “I can walk you there. If you’d like.” There’s a smile. “Sure.” Shared glances. A single eyeroll I pretend not to see. Our hands bump on the way out. Rain is like spittle blown onto my face. Definitely the kind of street I wish I was looking at rather than walking through. “God, I haven’t been here in ages.” Tom says.

“Miss it?” He shrugs, squinches up his face, runs a hand through his overgrown hair. New gestures for a new look. It’s hard to explain how he’s changed. It’s like he’s grown into himself, but stayed the same size. “Kinda. But then I have to miss everything. Up to and including Dad’s drinking habit, having to sneak around the back for smokes, keeping it quiet after eleven p.m.” Tom says. Oh. That hurts a little. “Right,” I say. Not for the first time, I suspect my eighteen months have been shorter than his eighteen months. We come into the convenience store hosting the ATM. The synthesis of the buzz of the refrigerators and the silver lighting makes me wonder if he’s remembering like I am; the latenight trips to the petrol station up the road from his house, buying Crunchies and cookie dough as preludes to hazy nights spent in his bedroom watching classic films till dawn. He hums merrily to himself while he withdraws a pineapple from the machine. What’s this wanting? What do I expect? Is he, too, feeling that burning urge near the base of his throat? There’s one photo I keep of him in one of those sepia mornings, bleary-eyed in one of his baggy t-shirts and tracksuit pants. The space between that moment and this one is quickly slipping to nothing. “Still smoke?” I ask, once we’re out the slide door. “No.” Tom says. “Unless you’re offering.”

“Why’s that?” “Cos I got you into them.” I give him a laugh. Is it narcissistic to want to be the affector rather than affected? The cigarette hits while we’re talking: I become unstuck in time. The streetlight glow is the dawn into a cramped bedroom’s window, the acidity of wine in my mouth is morning breath made cute by post-coital haze, I am in an age where the thing I want is the thing I have. We have to reclaim it; we have to go back. While our cigarettes burn to nubs, I search for something to say with the right balance between polite mundaneness and quirkiness. Nothing comes that’d be natural. So words are out, then. Set on not thinking about it, I lift my hand up and put it on his, almost disappointed when no sparks fly at contact. This is it. I’ve made a first step, sent out the missive: Take me, I’m yours. He stares at the hand, then into my eye. “You know,” Tom says, with that new, godawful chummy smile of his “I really like that we managed to be friends. After everything.” ‘Everything’ is apt- for me, at least. I pull my hand away, saying nothing. No moment is long enough, no cigarette, no kiss, no relationship. Doesn’t he remember? Why I might’ve picked that one place? The Japanese restaurant, this very street, another cool blue night, aeons ago, yet present, both of our breaths becoming thinner as our hands clasped one another, in what turned out to be both of our first unselfconscious performances of the gesture? I read somewhere bodies in the void of space will come together after a while; it was something like that.

“Yeah.” I say. “Come on, sit here.” We sit by the sill of the store window, while I pinch Winfield Blues from my pocket, offering it to him first. “When’d you quit?” I ask.

I realise I’ve been staring, looking for something long gone, and stare ahead. The evening deepens. Streetlights glare. Tom continues to smile, having forgotten.

“Ah... A while ago,” he says. “You have to stop, too, now.”

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COLD VEIL

WORDS || KELLY RAE OLANDER

The pages sigh with white murmurs fractured only by inked impressions like boot prints in the snow. The frosty desert untouched awaits vandalism to pervade like a hot nightmare melting - into sweaty truths. Sharp like glass under your skin tepid tears turn to watercolour in the silver spangled winter breaking, paper-thin.

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IN DARJEELING

WORDS || JACK CAMERON STANTON

an infinity of beedis together, at once, whatever.

When Rajj turned into the gritty avenue and disappeared through the doors of a tiny shop, I understand two things: we were no longer shopping for a jacket; and things were about to become complicated.

Head clouds drift across ineffable overcast and he offers me nothing, not even the fucking jacket, so we sip XXX rum (I supplied) from chai masala mud cups he discovered under Kashmiri shawls.

The opium’s romance, an eraser of eyeless infants and ennui, galloping toward the emaciated babas that sit and smoke and sing, cannot veil the gritty avenues, unwashed by crystal glycerine.

We shatter cups

But in the flesh, opium is nothing but adhesive dark honey; tissues from a bleeding nose. The dealer’s teeth, an aperture of trauma, have disintegrated; pearlescent algae along the harbour. Uncomfortable, Tim leaves. Yet I am enchanted – I pause, somnolent, to spark Virginian tailored – well, by everything, I suppose except the extortionate price: the merchant in rags deals in diamonds of crimson. Comatose, the dealer gives the illusion of smoking

again again on honey floors while limbless beggars tussle outside, again coalescing the fractures of mud, surrendered to seasons of sweltering sun.

My wallet has few rupees. In passing, the dealer pleads ‘My friend, my brother’ – his hand clutches mine, the wrong jigsaw piece forced onto another – ‘Let’s smoke ganja in the chillum, no?’ He lights chrysanthemum incense I, another tailored, and extends hands; flayed eels, like Orobus, electrocuted by its own tail.

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PHOTOS & WORDS || NICHOLAS RIDER

Each year on Anzac Day and Remembrance Day, thousands of official guests and visitors attend the Memorialâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s National Ceremonies on the Parade Ground at the Australian War Memorial in Canberra. This year, Anzac Day will mark its 100th anniversary.

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REPEAT OFFENDERS

THE STEW

WORDS || VANESSA CAPITO When I tried to think of restaurants that were ‘Australian’ and served what I felt was inherently ‘true blue’ food; I couldn’t think of any. Probably because I was trying to think of places that sold meat pies and sausages rolls and the only places that do are petrol stations, 7/11’s, and Pie Face. And I wasn’t going to do a review of any of those places. Although, the sausage rolls from Pie Face go alright. They’re a bit too flaky when you’re trying to devour one at 4am on a Sunday morning, but they’re certainly not the worst. Anyway, the only place that

sprung to mind wasn’t even in Australia, but down a side street in Manhattan that I stumbled upon when I was in New York earlier this year. It was this small joint that had a sign saying it sold meat pies, sausages rolls and lamingtons. It looked hella shady so I didn’t go in, but judging from its appearance, and absolute lack of customers, Australian cuisine (if we even have one) isn’t too desired. So, on that note, I decided to pick some places that highlight different cuisines and you should try them because they’re delicious; and I said so.

EL JANNAH

408 South Street, Granville Mon-Sat 10am-12am, Sun 10am-11pm El Jannah is where you go to satisfy all the garlic sauce cravings you’ve ever had in life. Honestly, I never thought I’d lose my shit over garlic sauce but here we are. It’s that good. But, garlic sauce aside, the charcoal chicken here is the best of the best. The crispiness of the skin has a slight smokiness, and the meat itself is tender. It’s everything you could ever want out of a chicken. Served with pickled cucumbers and turnip, lebanese bread and your favourite g-sauce, it only comes to $21 ($11.50 for a half chicken). It’s a seriously good deal, and it’s even cheaper if you get takeaway. Also, if you type El Jannah into YouTube you can also see their ad, which is hilariously bad. You should definitely watch it.

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FIVE POINT BURGERS

124 Walker Street, North Sydney (enter via Berry Street) Mon-Fri 11:30am-5pm

CHICA BONITA

7 The Corso, Manly Lunch: Tues-Sun 11:30am-3pm Dinner:Tues-Thurs & Sun 6pm-10pm, Fri-Sat 6pm-12am. Chica Bonita means ‘pretty girl’ in Spanish, and it’s safe to say the food here is more than pretty good. Hidden at the back of a little arcade, it spills onto the laneway behind Manly Corso. The bar and tables are decked with multi-coloured Mexican tiles and rainbowstriped cushions. The lunch menu boasts $13 burritos and the ‘cochinita pibil’, which is slow-roasted, shredded pork inside a sturdy, foil-wrapped burrito the size of your forearm. The guacamole, served with corn chips ($6) is seasoned perfectly and has just the right amount of lime. Be sure to try the carne asada fries ($12): a mountain of shoestring fries, strips of steak, salsa and guacamole with loads of melted cheese. Chica Bonita fills up, so I’d suggest going mid-week or getting in early.

For those of us who were lucky enough to stuff our faces with the deliciousness that is Shake Shack and In-N-Out Burger; it was great while it lasted. Fortunately, I’ve found a burger in Sydney that makes my taste buds sing the same songs of joy! Five Points Burgers is the new joint in town and it brings the greasy, cheesy, meaty wonders we’ve been missing for too long. Comparable to the burgers at Mary’s in Newtown, the menu at Five Points Burgers was devised by chef Tomislav Martinovic, a former chef of Heston Blumenthal. The Bronx Burger ($12.50) is where it’s at; beef patty, pickles, double American cheese, bacon, onion jam, iceberg lettuce, tomato sauce, mustard and aioli! Paired with the salted caramel milkshake ($6), you can’t go wrong (unless you’re a vegetarian, in which case, #sorrynotsorry).

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IN REVIEW

FILMS

CHAPPIE (2015)

REVIEW || CHARLIE SMITH Neill Blomkamp’s 2009 hit, District 9, is a masterpiece. Unfortunately, this year’s sci-fi action film, Chappie, is his weakest work to date. The plot can be best described as a mash-up of District 9 and I, Robot. I found the script frustrating in its stereotypical portrayal of Australians. You know, the usual bogan, ‘throw another shrimp on the barbie’ type. Unfortunately, the all-star cast (Hugh Jackman, Sigourney Weaver, Dev Patel) all give the worst performance of their careers. Blomkamp has also, strangely, cast Ninja and Yolandi Visser, who together make up the South African rap-rave group Die Antwood. Their music and merchandise are littered throughout the film, and the band members simply seem to be selling themselves, or, more accurately, their products, for over two hours. To sum up my feelings about Chappie, I’ll leave you with a quote from Vincent Moore (Jackman): “Mate, I’m as mad as a frog in a sock”. 2/5

THE BABADOOK (2014)

REVIEW || CHARLIE SMITH Debut director Jennifer Kent’s 2014 horror thriller, The Babadook, is a much appreciated breath of fresh air from Australian cinema. William Friedkin, director of what is arguably one of the scariest films ever made, The Exorcist (1973), said, “I’ve never seen a more terrifying film than The Babadook. It will scare the hell out of you as it did me”. If you’re after jump scares, look elsewhere. This is a psychological thriller that does a perfect job of making the viewer feel beyond uncomfortable. I implore you not to watch it in a dark room, or late at night. A truly terrifying film, it hinges upon making you imagine what will happen next, and it’s this tactic which makes The Babadook my favourite Australian film. 4.5/5

GALLIPOLI (TV MINISERIES) (2015)

REVIEW || SAMUEL IP Gallipoli is an eight-part miniseries produced by Nine Network, and stands out as one of the best locally produced war dramas. Starring young Aussie actor Kodi Smit-McPhee, Gallipoli tells the story of Australia’s first military engagement through the eyes of Thomas ‘Tolly’ Johnson, who has lied about his age to volunteer in the army. A long way from home, Tolly must battle hostility alongside his squad mates while trying his best to survive in a foreign and distant land. Gallipoli celebrates the bravery of the soldiers, but also leaves us with moments to reflect on those who have fought and fallen so far from home. While the series does have a few flaws, especially when the story shifts back to an Australian setting, Gallipoli is without a doubt an excellent show to help us mark an important milestone in Australian history. 4/5

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TWO HANDS (1999)

REVIEW || VANESSA CAPITO Two Hands is one of Australia’s quintessential gangster films. Sporting a seedy 1999 Kings Cross for its backdrop and in-your-face-violence, it delves into the underworld of Aussie criminals in footy shorts, thongs and a whole lot of mullet-esque hairstyles we’d love to forget. Heath Ledger leads as Jimmy, a 19-year-old club promoter and boxer who takes a chance with the felonious kingpin on the block, Pando (Bryan Brown). When things go wrong, Jimmy ends up owing Pando $10,000 and this enthralling crime thriller follows his escapades as he attempts to retrieve the loot. 3.5/5

BOOKS

CLOUDSTREET TIM WINTON

REVIEW || VANESSA CAPITO Tim Winton’s Cloudstreet tells of the aching, bitter, crude, and sweet fortunes of two Australian families, the Lambs and the Pickles, between 1944 and 1964. They live in the same rotting mansion, separated by thin walls and different ambitions. The families’ regard for each other alternates between disgust and wonder, passion and forgiveness, as their children and their backwater state of Western Australia grow up. Winton tells the classic tale of how each family are a unique disaster and a treasure. But this is no ordinary familial saga. Winton’s writing and prose is in a class of its own. He is fearless, calmly and confidently taking the reader from literal, linear storytelling to a subtle state of magical realism. His ability to capture the human condition is so incredibly well done in this book. Cloudstreet is an unforgettable novel, both for its content and its style. 4/5

SHANTARAM

GREGORY DAVID ROBERTS

REVIEW || JACK CAMERON STANTON Shantaram is the sprawling epic of Gregory David Roberts’ fugitive years in India. Originally, the novel was published as a biography until the particulars of Gregory’s life were contested in court as embellishments. Roberts’ literary alias, Linbaba, arrives in then Bombay searching for the hope of a new life amongst slums, the rampant underworld, and vibrant polarity of Indian culture. The story begins after his wife’s divorce when Linbaba spirals into a depression and becomes a heroin addict; gaining notoriety in Melbourne as the ‘Gentlemen Robber’ because he always said Please and Thank you. His long-awaited sequel, The Mountain Shadow, is due for release mid2015. 4.5/5

TOMORROW, WHEN THE WAR BEGAN JOHN MARSDEN

REVIEW || VANESSA CAPITO Tomorrow, When the War Began follows the story of Ellie and her friends, who return from a camping trip in the Australian bush, to what seems like a nightmare — their families are gone. Gradually, the seven teenagers begin to realise that their country has been invaded and their town has been taken prisoner. As the reality of the situation sets in, the teens are forced to start making big decisions. True to the blurb, Tomorrow, When the War Began will make you question yourself. Would you fight? Have the courage to be a hero? Would you give up? Nothing in this book is simply black or white. It veers from the strict dichotomy that’s often seen in young-adult dystopian literature: citizens are good, government is bad. Ellie in particular, as the novel’s protagonist and narrator, struggles with the concept of ‘evil’. There wasn’t as much action as I would’ve expected from a novel about war, and for me, it reads more as a survivalist novel embedded with bits of teenage romance. 2.5/5

THE ROSIE PROJECT GRAEME SIMSION REVIEW || REGINA FEATHERSTONE Simsion’s first published novel was so successful; he has followed up with The Rosie Effect in late 2014. The book follows Don Tillman, a genetic professor on a quest to find a wife using the only skill he knows; quantitative research. His ‘wife questionnaire’ didn’t factor in crossing paths with Rosie, a younger, vibrant woman on her own quest to find her real father. This book is delightfully fun and easy to read. Simsion’s portrayal of a genetics professor with Asperger’s leaves some genuinely funny and also, lovely moments. This is a great novel to take on a weekend away. 4.5/5

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MUSIC

#1 DADS ABOUT FACE (ALBUM)

REVIEW || VANESSA CAPITO With two sold out shows at Oxford Art Factory in July and another show just released, it’s not hard to understand why there’s so much hype around the latest album from #1 Dads. About Face is the second record from Melbournebased Tom Iansek, one half of Big Scary. Iansek already had an audience from his first album, Man Of Leisure. After just one listen, it’s clear that his second is a truly accomplished piece and has certainly elevated #1 Dads from just a simple side-project. The opener, ‘My Rush’, is driven and heartfelt, and builds from a muffled drum to layers of strong guitars. Lyrics like “You’re the current I can’t escape, draw me down to your depths” could be written for the album itself. ‘So Soldier’, sung by Ainslie Wills, is melodic and pleasant, completely capturing you from the start. Wills’ angelic vocals, paired with Iansek’s synth magic, create a sound that’s entirely reminiscent of your favourite Fleetwood Mac song. Another hit is the track ‘Return To’, which features Tom Snowdon. It’s a slower track, but offers far more depth and you can’t help being captivated by the piano riffs in the chorus. A few of the more upbeat hits include ‘For Randy Robinson and Cassidy’ and ‘Blood pt 2’, both of which are personal favourites. But to be honest, it’s close to impossible to pick one favourite from this album, because each song is so intrinsically different, and I can’t find a single flaw in any of them. Two years in the making, About Face is a stellar record from the heart; for the soul. PS. Definitely check out their cover of FKA Twigs’ ‘Two Weeks’ on Triple J’s Like A Version. 5/5

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TAME IMPALA ‘CAUSE I’M A MAN’ (SONG)

REVIEW || VANESSA CAPITO Tame Impala’s third album, Currents will be released later this year. Earlier this month the band unleashed the trippy cover art and official first single, ‘Cause I’m A Man’. A synth-heavy ballad, this latest track from the Perth band represents another new sonic dimension from frontman Kevin Parker. The slow jam and subtle funk touches are perhaps something Parker brought back home after working with Mark Ronson recently. With an underlying bass line that’s super catchy, the overall tune is ambient and spacious. 4/5

AIRLING LOVE GRACEFULLY (EP)

REVIEW || VANESSA CAPITO Love Gracefully is the debut EP from Airling, the brainchild of Brisbane artist Hannah Shepherd, who recently finished supporting Vance Joy on his Australian tour. Love Gracefully is intimate, wild, and an absolute stunner. Shepherd delivers dreamlike vocals that are lush and harmonious, revealing just how incredible her talents are. The first track ‘Ouroboros’ is a soulful start to the EP, with layered vocals and soft drums; it’s a delicately constructed masterpiece. Next up is ‘By Thorns’, and while it follows in a similar vein, its distinct riffs really set it apart. The first single off the track ‘The Runner’ has this cool, nineties chill-out vibe paired with dance synths and gentle beats and it’s certainly the most poppy out of the five tracks. ‘Where You Are’ might close the EP, but the completely raw track heralds a piano and Shepherd’s strong voice and is a surefire feat for the Brisbane artist. Love Gracefully is one of the most mature and developed debuts to come out recently. 4/5

GAMES

BATTLEFIELD HARDLINE

FOR PC, PS3, PS4, XBOX 360, XBOX ONE REVIEW || BLAKE SHERRY As the battle for the leading multiplayer First Person Shooter game continues to wage, I feel as if audiences are beginning to experience fatigue. There are only so many gritty shooters released year after year that can hold your attention before you become bored. That being said, however, the latest Battlefield attempts to mix up this formula with an engaging single player campaign mode, a focusing on modern day heists, as opposed to future military warfare. The result? Meh. The campaign follows an interesting concept, a TV cop drama akin to Miami Vice, where each level is a different episode (title sequences and all). This is a nice idea, however it is played relatively safe, and sadly never lives up to the potential it promises. More enduring problems persist though; with your character (insert generic police officer here) being able to arrest people with the push of a button, often transforming what would be a tense gunfight into a laughable win. The multiplayer is phenomenal, however, ranging from heists that pit cops against robbers, to the more traditional player vs. player modes. The gunplay is tight, fast and team-focused, however, ultimately forgettable. 3/5

COLOUR JUMP

FOR ANDROID REVIEW || JACQUELINE GIESSER Colour Jump is a fun and addictive game from a small startup Australian company called Hamsky & Co. Comparing it to 2014’s infamous Flappy Bird, there’s a high chance Colour Jump could be its 2015 successor. You might find yourself playing it under the desk in what feels like a poor attempt at procrastinating. What you’re not realising is, that it’s helping your cognitive abilities of memory and responsiveness. The best part is, it’s super easy-to-use and soon enough, you’ll be challenging your friends to compete for the highest score. 3/5

MARIO KART 8

FOR WII U REVIEW || BLAKE SHERRY Nintendo’s latest instalment brings back the familiar formula that defined our childhood, only this time, in far more detail and a fluid 60fps. Running in an upgraded 1080p resolution, the game is definitively the most beautiful the series has ever looked. But what has changed? Apart from now seeing Bowser in colourful high definition as he smugly throws a red shell into your face and drives right past you – quite a lot actually. The series has expanded its character roster from 26 to 30, added in vehicle customisation and non-linear racecourses as well. The traditional modes of grand prix, time trial, versus and battle mode return, as well as an online mode, which ranks players according to their results. Don’t have anyone to play with? Rest easy as rubber-band AI was taken out of this instalment, which means that the computer bots will not automatically catch up no matter how far you are ahead, and the 150cc difficulty is as hard as ever. The core of Mario Kart is as good as ever in this instalment, ruining friendships with a well-timed projectile weapon and winning at the last moment. Buyers beware though; the blue shell also makes a return. 4/5

I AM BREAD

FOR MAC, PC REVIEW || SARAH BASFORD From the makers of Surgeon Simulator, comes 2015’s strangest game yet, I Am Bread. Players control the movements of a slice of bread as they maneovre it across mundane environments in order to get it toasted. Over tables and past fish bones, just don’t fall on the ground or you’re toast - figuratively speaking, actually. Failing is incredibly easy as the game’s aim is to ensure editibility of your character and actions such as falling on the dirty kitchen floor don’t make your bread a tasty treat. The controls are incredibly difficult to get used to and the creators’ recommendation to use a controller pad is well-advised. This slice-of-life game about one neatly cut piece of bread in its journey to become a fully fledged slice of toast is heartfelt and will make you ponder about life’s tough questions. 3.5/5

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HOROSCOPES WORDS || VANESSA CAPITO

ARIES

Listen friend, this month is gonna push your butt into overdrive, but don’t fret, that packet of Tim Tams isn’t going anywhere until you’re ready for it. Can I get an amen?

TAURUS

The weather is changing but your horns will power you through. Just don’t stab anyone, because that’s illegal. Instead, take a step back and count backwards from ten, then pour yourself a drink.

GEMINI

Trust your gut this month, and download that TV series you wanted to watch because your assessment will get done. Your gut promises you. But for the love of tacos, stay off the darknet.

CANCER

Ryan Gosling never said he was going to have your babies, so I wouldn’t count on it. But you can count on your train being on time. Actually, maybe not that either.

LEO

It’s only good things for Leo the Lion this month. Unfortunately, if you’re Leah the Lizard, your tail will get cut off, and it won’t grow back. But those shoes you’re sporting are workin’ gurl.

VIRGO

Shake it off, Virgo, and then switch it back on because your libido will go crazy. And by libido I also mean your appetite, desire to sleep, and your need to look at cats drinking water from taps.

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LIBRA

Libra rhymes with Bieber, but you’re nothing like that yellowed-haired muffin. You’re strong, intelligent and you don’t get roasted; you get to eat the damn roast. Own it, and buy a lollipop for dessert.

SCORPIO

Velvet wasn’t always for you, but try it on sometime, because expanding your horizons is never a bad thing. Leonardo DiCaprio hasn’t won an Oscar, but maybe he has velvet in his closet.

SAGITTARIUS

Swim, swim, and swim some more my little Sagi babies. Nemo once said, “just keep swimming, just keep swimming”. Jokes, that was Ellen. But the joke isn’t on you this month. Godspeed!

CAPRICORN

Robert Pattinson once said something, but that’s not important. What is important is the yellow rubber duckie at the $2 store you said no to. Run back for it now, before it’s too late!

AQUARIUS

You, you are the bomb. That dream about being stuck in a cave with a purple Starburst was a sign of the caterpillar life you’ve been living. Break free, like Troy and Gabriella, and let the world see you.

PISCES

If you paint your nails green, your nails will be green. If you cut off all your hair, you’ll have no hair. Do as you please, but don’t forget to take your valuables with you when you park your car.

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