iris
bridal preview
Tips for selecting wedding day flowers
Honeymoon
Packing Pointers
February - March
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The Day of Your Dreams... A large church wedding . . . an intimate garden setting . . . Let’s make that day more memorable. Bridal bouquets tied with French ribbon . . . elegant boutonnieres. Have you thought of romantic wreaths for the church doors? Tussie-mussies for the grandmothers? Whether you are planning a formal affair with eight attendants, a beautiful tiered cake, or a casual rehearsal barbeque supper, we can make it happen. Love, a stunning gown, the handsome groom and naturally flowers . . . We are here to create a wedding to remember.
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On the cover: Mrs. Kelly Rowell Kelly Elaine Baker and James Michael Rowell were married Saturday, Jan. 18, 2014, at First Presbyterian Church in Sumter.
The O’Donnell House Sumter’s Premiere Event Venue
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contents
{PAGE 05} Engagement ring shopping {PAGE 07} Engagement photo tips {PAGE 08} Don’t overlook the importance of wedding day photography {PAGE 09} Tuxedo purchasing tips {PAGE 10} Factors to consider before deciding on a destination wedding {PAGE 12} Letter to the bride {PAGE 14} Honeymoon packing pointers {PAGE 15} What guests can expect to spend to attend a wedding {PAGE 16} Tips when choosing a honeymoon destination {PAGE 18} Tips for selecting wedding day flowers {PAGE 20} Tips for making seating arrangements {PAGE 22} Origins of the term honeymoon
2014 Layout and Design Cary Johnson Howard cjohnson@theitem.com Manon Zamora Barwick mbarwick@theitem.com The Item Osteen Publishing Co. 20 N. Magnolia Street Sumter, SC 29150 www.theitem.com
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engagement ring
SHOPPING GUIDE
Long before couples stand before an officiant and say, “I do,” many make another pledge to each other by getting engaged and agreeing to begin a new life together. In a 2011 survey by from XO Group, Inc., formerly The Knot Inc., the average engagement ring costs Americans $5,200. Canadians spend around $5,000 as well. Considering an engagement ring is typically a once-in-a-lifetime purchase, many men say the high cost is warranted and are even willing to finance the purchase or push their budgets to procure a beautiful ring. Many engagement rings feature a 1-carat center stone with some smaller stones surrounding, accounting for a 1.4 total carat weight on average. It can take a groom-tobe around three months to find his (and her) ideal ring, sometimes longer. Considering a ring is such a significant investment, it pays to have some knowledge in gem selection. START BY ANSWERING A FEW QUESTIONS Having an idea of what you want can help anyone get a better deal, whether one is shopping for a new sofa or an engagement ring. An informed shopper can avoid being taken advantage of or buying something that really isn’t worth the asking price.
The 4 Cs is a good place for shoppers to get started. Various attributes affect the value, quality and beauty of a diamond. The 4 Cs stand for cut, color, clarity, and carat weight. The cut refers to the shape of the stone as well as the skill involved in achieving the shape of the facets so that it reflects the light brilliantly. The color is designated by the International Gemological Institute. The grading color in a diamond determines how closely a diamond’s color approaches colorlessness. The diamond will be assigned a letter grade. The lower the letter in the alphabet, the whiter the stone. Clarity refers to the amount, size, type, and location of internal flaws in a diamond, also known as inclusions. The cost of the diamond increases when there are fewer inclusions in the stone. Finally, the carat weight is the size and weight of the stone. The larger the stone, the more pricey it can be. Another question to ask is which style of ring your girlfriend prefers? Your fiancée-tobe may have a certain setting style and diamond shape preference. It pays to know what she wants, including the type of setting the stone will be encased in. You should also know whether she will be happy with a larger stone that may have some imperfections not easily seen to the naked eye or a smaller, flawless stone.
KNOW YOUR BUDGET Many expenses are associated with planning a wedding, and some couples may not want to begin their lives together in debt. This may need to be factored in to the decision-making process. You should go to jewelry stores to price out different styles and see how diamonds compare. This way you will have an accurate idea of just how much rings cost. Carefully consider your options. Having an intimate knowledge of what your girlfriend will want can help you to narrow down something that is reasonable. It also pays to understand a jeweler’s return policy. Even if you may know what she likes, in the event that the ring doesn’t work out, find out if the style can be changed or if you can get a refund or make an exchange. OTHER TIPS FOR SAVINGS SUCCESS There are ways to maximize your budget and still end up with a beautiful stone. • Ask for a stone that is slightly less than the next carat, for example 0.9 instead of one carat. This nearly indiscernible difference can add up to substantial savings. Experts say the price difference between a 1.90 carat diamond and a 2.0 carat diamond can be as much as $5,000. Also, choose a stone that has more surface area, which will
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make it appear larger even if it does not have as much sparkle. • If she prefers the look of platinum, realize white gold, silver or tungsten are more affordable options and will still give off that silvery hue she desires. Mixed gold colors, including white, pink and yellow, can be unique. • Try to buy a loose diamond. You can inspect the entire stone and then shop around for an acceptable setting. This can save you money in the long run by buying the ring elements separately. • Get a part-time job at a jewelry store. This way you may be eligible for an employee discount and can put the savings toward the ring. • Don’t shy away from a warehouse store for a good deal on rings. As long as the diamond is to your liking and follows the
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requirements of the 4 Cs that you desire, it should not matter where the ring was purchased. • Make sure the store is accredited by the Jewelers of America or is a member of the Gemological Institute of America. This way you know you are buying from a reputable source and the diamonds were acquired ethically. • Negotiate the price. Just because it is jewelry doesn’t mean you can’t comparison shop and find out if another jeweler will match a competitor’s offer. Many stores will be willing to negotiate if it means making a sale. An engagement ring is a large purchase that requires ample forethought. Following some guidelines can yield the results couples desire.
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engagementphoto Photo by: Robert Max
TIPS
Newly engaged couples choose to capture the occasion in photos that they can cherish. Often, one of these photos is used as an announcement to family and friends and might even be published in the newspaper. Engagement photos may be part of a package negotiated with the photographer who will be covering the wedding day. Some couples enlist the help of a friend or a budding photographer to capture an engagement shot. The average cost of engagement photos can range from $200 to $500. Some couples opt to use a photographer who might specialize in other areas (i.e. fashion models) but may want to break into the wedding biz because of how lucrative it can be. Costs may be negotiated as a result. When shopping around for a photographer, there are certain things couples should keep in mind. The first and most important is selecting a photographer you can relate to. If you don’t feel a connection with the photographer, he or she will have trouble coaxing the shots that will produce the best results. He or she should also be a professional and have some experience working with posing couples. This way the photos don’t look stiff or contrived. Here are some other tips that can lead to great photos. • Find a photographer who fits your style. If you’re a quirky couple, go with a quirky photographer. If you’re reserved and a follow-thebook type of couple, then select a more traditional photographer. Some photographers out there forget that this is your moment and want to impart their idea of what you want. Make sure he or she takes your ideas into consideration. • Select one who is open to different shoot locations and brainstorming. Some of the best photos occur in natural settings, where things aren’t entirely planned. If a photographer simply
works out of a studio, you may want to select one who has more free reign with different locales. • Choose your location wisely. Certain locations will stand out in your minds because they are visually stunning or are special places where you have spent moments as a couple. By choosing a place that offers a personal connection, there’s a good chance you’ll appreciate the photos in the long run. Also, be open to the fact that unplanned stops may offer a great background for the image. Be open to the unexpected. • Try random poses and some candid shots. Although you might have a vision of the perfect photo in your mind, experimenting with different ideas can sometimes lead to a great photo you really love. Expect to take your share of kissing, nose-touching and portrait shots. But some fun poses, such as running or jumping (or rolling around on a beach full of waves) can produce candid shots that are truly masterpieces. Remember, sometimes photographers will pose you in positions that seem a bit awkward, but this is to get the best lines of the body and flattering images. • Choose clothing that fits the mood. If time and budget allows, have several different wardrobe changes so that you can see which outfits work and which ones don’t. A formal outfit, comfortable street clothes, something beachy or clothing that fits with your interests (such as polo or baseball) can make for interesting engagement photos. Avoid clothing that is too trendy or busy, which may take away from the actual images in the long run. Plus, you don’t want to look back at these photos in the future and say, “What was I thinking?” Avoid matchy-matchy, though. If you are dressed alike, you may appear to be trying too hard. It’s the individual personalities you want to shine through. A SUPPLEMENT TO THE ITEM • FEBRUARY - MARCH 2014 7
DON’T OVERLOOK THE IMPORTANCE OF
wedding day photography
Limousines, gowns and flowers are each important components of a couple’s wedding day. But few aspects of a wedding are as important as photography. Thanks to the popularity of social media, some couples may overlook the importance of hiring a professional photographer for their weddings. Although there is something to be said for candid images captured on phones and personal cameras, the pictures a couple will cherish and look back on for decades are best supplied by a professional photographer. Even if you will be hiring a videographer and having photos snapped by loving friends and family, professional wedding photography is an ideal way to immortalize this special day. Most couples say “I do” with the hopes of staying together forever, giving them only one chance to capture the magic of the wedding day on film. Leaving photos to chance by hiring an amateur photographer may be something couples regret down the road. Professional photographers use high-quality equipment that will produce much better results than photos snapped on the average digital camera. Plus, the photographer has experience with posing, placement of arms and legs, head tilting, and lighting, each of which ensures that the photos come out looking as good as possible. While a friend may not notice an eyesore in the rear of a photo composition when taking a picture, a professional may notice something that will stand out and make adjustments. Furthermore, professional photographers tend to have an eye for interesting angles to capture images that may be overlooked. Rather than a series of portraits at one level, he or she may climb high for aerial shots or lie on the floor 8 FEBRUARY - MARCH 2014 • A SUPPLEMENT TO THE ITEM
for a different perspective. The results may be unique vantage points that set your wedding photos apart from those of the masses. Price alone should not dictate which photographer to hire. Although wedding budgets are often stretched, skimping on a photography allotment may result in subpar results. That doesn’t mean you need to hire the most expensive photographer, but couples should realize the value of experience and professional equipment, both of which tend to come at a premium price. Do not expect to pay package prices that would be offered at department or discount stores. Many photographers are artists who take their work very seriously. A photographer will be spending all day with you capturing hundreds of photos. Each image will then need to be reviewed, repositioned and potentially enhanced or retouched. This time-consuming attention to detail is often what dictates the higher costs of a very good photographer. Keep in mind that photographers are unique individuals and not all the visions and styles of particular artists will meld with your own perception of how you want the wedding to look. Expressing your expectations and comparing your goals with the portfolios of photographers will help you find the best fit. Do not feel shy about asking for testimonials from past customers or talking to couples you know who have recently gotten married and asking for a recommendation. While couples are making wedding day magic, photographers are behind the scenes capturing all of the memories couples can relive for years and years to come.
The Diamond Source TUXEDO PURCHASING Gentlemen getting ready to tie the knot will have to make certain wardrobe choices so they look their best on their big days. Although many grooms-to-be rent tuxedos on their wedding days, it may be more cost-effective to purchase a tuxedo. Tuxedos are the ultimate formal wear for men. Worn at formal gatherings like proms, weddings and lavish parties, tuxedos have undergone several style changes over the years. Men interested in looking polished will find no option makes that impression more convincingly than the right tuxedo. Men frequently called upon to attend formal events may find purchasing a tuxedo is a wise investment. There are several advantages to owning a tux rather than renting one time and again. Tuxedos typically cost around $1,000, whereas renting tuxedos can be $200 or more each time, making it advantageous for men who frequently don tuxedos to purchase their own rather than rent. Another advantage to owning a tuxedo is the opportunity to wear a tux that is custom-made and tailored just for you. Instead of a rental that will merely be stitched temporarily to fit your measurements, a tuxedo you purchase will be tailored specifically to your body, increasing comfort and making you look better as well. Men who buy their own tuxedos also can choose the style, fabric, color, buttons, accessories, and type of lapels on the jacket. A tuxedo store may have more styles
pointers
available for sale than for rent. If you desire something that fits your personality and your physique perfectly, buying your own tuxedo may be your best bet. Men worried about purchasing a tuxedo only to see their waistlines increase or decrease should keep in mind that many tuxedo shops offer free tailoring for as long as you own the tuxedo. When purchasing a tuxedo, men should choose classic styles and colors so they can enjoy the tux for years to come. Opt for a slim-fitting white shirt underneath that won’t billow out when jackets are removed. Men who want to break from tradition can opt for a shirt that is a pale blue or light gray to wear under the jacket. This is still an understated look, but one with a hint of creativity. A classic, black bow tie is an ideal match when purchasing a more classic tuxedo. The bow tie is back in a big way, and men who want to spice things up can purchase more traditional neckties for those occasions when they don’t want to wear bow ties. Tuxedos come with different lapel styles, and it’s important to know the differences. Today’s most popular style is the notch lapel, wherein a triangular indentation is cut where the lapel joins the collar. This lapel mimics the shape of a classic suit. A peak lapel is the quintessential classic, featuring a broad, V-shaped lapel that points up and out just below the collar line. A shawl lapel is a smooth, rounded edge lapel. The shawl lapel reached the height of its popularity in the 1950s, but it can still look good today.
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FACTORS TO CONSIDER BEFORE DECIDING ON A
destination wedding
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But as popular as destination weddings may be, there are factors that the bride- and groom-to-be must consider on their way to deciding if a destination wedding is for them. AFFORDABILITY Couples with large families tend to look at destination weddings as more affordable than a wedding in their hometown. That’s because destination weddings tend to attract fewer guests, which is fewer mouths to feed at the reception. But a smaller guest list will not necessarily offset the cost of getting married at a seaside resort. Such resorts may have shorter wedding seasons, increasing the competition for the venue and subsequently driving up the price. In addition, the cost of travel to such resorts can prove costly for couples and their guests, especially if the resort only hosts weddings during the height of its tourist season. LAWS Local laws also must be considered before deciding on a destination wedding. Some locales require couples to establish residency within the town’s limits before they can get married, and the paperwork to get married overseas can be significant. Planning a wedding can be difficult enough without having to do extra work to secure a wedding license. Many couples may find a destination wedding is more difficult than they anticipated. RESOURCES Remote islands may seem like the ideal place for an intimate wedding, but such locales may not have the same resources as more developed destinations. For example, the reception menu for a wedding in a remote island locale may be far more limited due the difficulty of getting certain foods onto the island while they’re still fresh. In addition, such a locale likely won’t have as many options with regard to vendors, forcing couples to go with less experienced professionals and leaving them at the mercy of local vendors’ rates. GUESTS While a small guest list might seem like a great way to save money, couples who come from closely knit families may find a destination wedding excludes many of their guests who simply can’t afford to make the trip. That can make a couple regret the decision to have a destination wedding later on when they look back on their wedding day and recognize that so many of their valued friends and family members were unable to attend. ACTIVITIES According to the Destination Weddings Study, roughly one-third of couples who choose destination weddings plan a group activity such as sightseeing for their guests, and more than half of those couples pay for the cost of the activity out of their own pockets. Such activities, while fun and a nice gesture for guests who made the trip despite the cost, can have a large impact on a couple’s wedding budget. Destination weddings continue to be a popular choice for couples tying the knot. But couples must consider more than just cost before deciding if a destination wedding is for them.
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LETTER TO THE
Bride
by Misty Ureche Licensed esthetician, advanced body wrap professional and co-owner of Spa Serenity and Denise Bethea Licensed esthetician, Certified professional makeup artist, certified photographer and co-owner of Spa Serenity
As we all know a brides wedding day is filled with many different emotions. The excitement, anticipation and stress can be overwhelming. There are many ways to destress to help look and feel your best for the big day. One of the best and most popular is to have a spa day just before the wedding or replace this as your bridal shower. This is alot of fun and a great way to relax and rejuvenate yourself because we all know, a beautiful, relaxed bride is a happy bride. It is also very important to remember that the months and weeks leading up to the wedding is an As licensed estheticians, we can improve or correct any esthetic issues you may have. We will provide you with result oriented monthly facials and advanced treatments along with our five star esthetics massage for relaxation. We will go over treatment protocols for at home use, as this is a must to keep your skin flawless. Along with skin concerns are the body concerns. We provide many body treatments but our most popular is our detox, slimming and contouring wrap. This wrap will aid in that perfect fit into your wedding gown. This wrap will involve a series of treatments and at home protocols. Our experienced nail tech knows the importance of manicures and pedicures and can give your hands that perfect look to accentuate that beautiful new ring and sexy soft feet are always a plus. Body waxing is the perfect way to remove
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any unwanted hair and lets face it, who wants to worry about shaving on their honeymoon. A must in waxing is our eyebrow wax and sculpt. The eyes are the first thing people look at on the face and its important to have the eyebrows looking flawless and will aid in making your professional makeup application perfect. Whether you are the bride, mother of the bride, bridesmaid, or guest, you may be in need of how to get the perfect wedding day look. Everyone wants a flawless face for their wedding day. chances are there will probably be more pictures taken of you on this day than any other day of your life. The trick is to look your most beautiful without even trying. As a seasoned makeup artist, trained and certified by hollywood makeup artist, Dina Ousley ,I have extensive knowledge in the art of flawless beauty. In my earlier years, I was an owner of a glamour photography business for over 15 years. This amazing experience took me to many places performing makeovers on thousands of women. My interest in the photography part of the business grew and after being certified in photography I then started enjoying the art of wedding photography but my desire to help women achieve flawless beauty did not end there. I am now a licensed esthetician specializing in advanced skin care techniques and a co-owner of Spa Serenity in Manning S.C. Ladies keep in mind that photography, especially flash photography has a way of flattening features and enhancing all those things you dont like about your face so its wise to find a professional and work with him or her on the look you like. I would suggest you ask your artist for a trial run. Dont let the artist apply anything to shimmery on your brow bone. It will act like a mirror when the flash goes off. Be sure to avoid lip colors that are in to much contrast to your skin tone. The camera has a hard time adjusting for contrast and the results can be muddy. Depending on the brides skin type, you want more of a radiant finish for drier skin and a matte finish for oilier skin. you want the face to look flawless because the most important part of photography is the finish to the skin. Wear a little more blush than you think you should because thats usually the first thing to go aside from lip color. Speaking of lips, I would suggest you choose a lip liner one shade darker than your natural lip tone in beige family. Filling in the whole lip area before applying color or gloss can extend your coverage. My personal favorite lip color product is lip fixation by jane iredale. This is a lip stain that will last all day long, through kisses and conversations with very little touch-up needed. It is great for photography and can be worn with or without gloss. As a photographer, the last thing I want to see on a bride is shine. When the skin is shinny you loose the true features of the face. To control this problem, I suggest using absence oil control primer by jane iredale. This product will help with the longevity of your makeup and help control oil and shine, it also evens out skin texture and creates a radiant finish. The one general rule a bride must remember is that if your wearing pure white, pinks and lilacs in your makeup will look the most flattering and If your in off-white, peaches and apricots are the colors for you. As licensed estheticians, makeup artists and spa owners, we at spa serenity are dedicated to making your special day even better. Whether its just for you, the bride or your full wedding party. We can arrange a spa day that will leave you looking and feeling your very best! A SUPPLEMENT TO THE ITEM • FEBRUARY - MARCH 2014 13
HONEYMOON PACKING
pointers
Many couples think that preparing for a honeymoon means bringing with them as many things as they can possibly carry. While this may be a good way to fend off forgetfulness, it also could mean being bogged down with unwieldy bags that cost more money to ship. But couples who pack too little may end up paying premium prices for necessities upon arrival at their destinations. The key is to pack the right blend of items by having a honeymoon go-to list at the ready. Roughly 50 to 75 percent of the more than two million couples tying the knot in North America every year embark on honeymoons shortly after walking down the aisle. According to the Travel Industry Association of America, the honeymoon accounts for 14 percent of a couple’s wedding budget. Couples tend to spend an average of $4,500 on their honeymoons, which typically last a week or more. Whether you’re sailing off on a cruise or flying to a popular overseas destination, there are a number of things you will need to bring along for the trip, and having a list that you can check off will make packing that much easier. 14 FEBRUARY - MARCH 2014 • A SUPPLEMENT TO THE ITEM
There are a number of other tasks competing for your attention close to the wedding, so think about your list early on. A suitcase stocked with what you need won’t expire, so you can take care of packing when you have a free moment, then stash suitcases in an out-of-the-way location. If you take any medications that will need to be brought along, allow yourself ample time to visit the doctor and ask for a prescription renewal so you won’t run out while away. Always store these medications in their original packaging so that items checked by customs or airline personnel can be easily identified. It also pays to know the rules of the airline well in advance. Contact customer service or visit the airline’s Web site to determine if there are any baggage weight limits or any restrictions regarding carry-on items. In the wake of increased security measures, regulations regarding toiletries, liquids and other such items may change. Don’t be caught without something you need because it was confiscated prior to boarding. Roughly 80 percent of new brides take their husband’s last name after their weddings, but new brides may want to wait until after they return from their honeymoons to officially change their names. This way there will be no hassle when you check-in at the airport or any hold-ups when traveling internationally with a married name that does not match the name on your passport. There will be plenty of time to change your name after the honeymoon.
Items to Pack on Your Honeymoon
Eyeglasses/contacts: Bring your spare pair of contact lenses or eyeglasses in case your primary pair is lost or damaged.
Camera and accessories: Bring the camera for capturing all of your memories. But don’t forget to bring a charger and extra batteries. Pack an extra memory card unless you will be downloading the photos to a laptop or uploading them to a storage system. If you are traveling internationally, you will need an electrical converter to plug in any electronics.
Fold-up travel bag: This extra bag can be used to tote items to and from the beach or while sightseeing. It also can be used to carry any souvenirs that may take up too much space in your luggage.
Cash: You will need some cash even if you’re visiting an all-inclusive resort. In addition, take one or two major credit cards if you do not enjoy carrying too much cash. Only bring what you need because you don’t want to face the hassle of canceling cards or replacing the contents of your wallet should something go missing. Clothing: Try to pack clothing that can be mixed and matched for a number of different looks. Solid-colored pants, shorts or skirts paired with different tops is an easy way to achieve new looks. Remember to bring at least one dressier option in clothing for a night out at a special dinner. Bring along at least two swimsuits to have one available while the other is drying. Comfort products: Items like insect repellent, sunburn soothing cream, aspirin, motion-sickness medication, and more may be very expensive at your destination, so bring these items from home.
Feminine hygiene products: Feminine hygiene products may be unavailable where you are traveling, so don’t forget to bring some along.
Hair products: The hotel may provide certain toiletries, but bring along travelsized hair products to ensure your hair looks good during your trip. Phone: Check with your mobile carrier to find out about roaming charges or if you will incur extra chargings making calls or accessing data at your destination. If so, you may be able to purchase prepaid phone cards or negotiate a temporary international rate. Sunscreen: Pack some sunscreen so you don’t return home from your honeymoon with a bad sunburn. Toiletries: Cotton swabs, razors, toothbrushes, shaving cream, and the like are items to bring from home, as they are likely to cost a lot more at your destination than they do at home. Work-out clothing: If you plan on visiting the resort’s fitness center, pack a pair of athletic shoes and shorts or sweatpants. Zipper-top bags: Bring along various sizes of storage bags to store wet swimsuits or for protecting and sorting different items.
WHAT GUESTS CAN EXPECT TO SPEND TO ATTEND A WEDDING
Millions of people will attend one or more weddings this year. For every couple ready to say, “I do,” there is a sea of people excited about celebrating the event. Getting invited to a wedding is an honor many people are happy to accept. Some do so before they give ample thought to the cost involved in participating in a wedding. Wedding guests can be informed of the costs they should expect upon mailing back their wedding response card. A lot of attention is often placed on just how much couples spend to have the wedding of their dreams. Little focus is put on the expenses wedding guests will accrue to attend such an affair. According to the latest American Express Spending & Saving Tracker, guests can anticipate a cost of nearly $540 per wedding. If a person will be in the wedding party, he or she can expect to pay another $30 to $40 more. The majority of the money spent when attending a wedding goes toward the gift for the couple. While many people will select an item from the bride and groom’s registry, many opt to give cash. American Express says wedding guests will spend an average of $108 on gifts. Factors such as whether the couple is a relative or a close friend will impact how much of a gift is given. If the wedding reception will be held in an opulent location, where it is anticipated the per-head cost for attendees is lofty, guests may opt to gift a little more. After gifts, wardrobe and travel are other major expenses that wedding guests will need to consider. If the wedding is close by, transportation
costs may be minimal. However, if the wedding is across the country or at an international destination, travel expenses will include accommodations, dining out and airline tickets. Wardrobe will be based on the type of wedding, whether it is a formal occasion or a casual affair. Women can expect to pay $50 and up for a cocktail dress. Jewelry, accessories and shoes may run another $100 more. Gentleman who already own a suit may just need to have it dry cleaned and purchase a new tie. A new suit can cost a few hundred dollars, depending on the designer. Individuals who are in the wedding can expect to pay around $100 for their gown or tuxedo rental. Women may be responsible for their own hair styling and makeup application. Participation in a bachelor or bachelorette party can cost bridal party members $60 and up, depending on the venue. Elaborate parties may include travel and cost even more. Parents of children who are not invited to the wedding will have to pay for childcare. Some babysitters charge anywhere from $10 to $15 per hour to watch children. The average wedding reception can run anywhere from four to five hours. That means parents need to budget an additional $50 to $75 in babysitting fees and even more for incidentals to pay for entertainment and meals. While the couple exchanging vows pays the heftiest price for a wedding, that doesn’t mean wedding guests are without expenses. There are a number of costs wedding guests must consider before deciding to attend.
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honeymoon destination TIPS WHEN CHOOSING A
As couples cope with the stress and struggles of planning a wedding, many begin to see their honeymoons as a time when they can finally unwind and relax without having to worry about seating arrangements, vendor negotiations or the host of other responsibilities that come with planning a wedding. But securing the perfect honeymoon can be nearly as difficult as planning the wedding. The biggest dilemma couples face when planning a honeymoon is where to spend that first week or so as a married couple. The right locale for a honeymoon varies depending on the couple. Some might prefer a Hawaiian island while others might find a week spent camping in a national park is more their style. Whatever you and your future spouse’s style may be, the following are a few tips to ensure you both have the time of your lives. • Decide what you can afford. The days when the bride’s father takes care of the bill for the wedding are largely a thing of the past. Many of today’s couples finance their own weddings, which 16 FEBRUARY - MARCH 2014 • A SUPPLEMENT TO THE ITEM
can leave little money leftover for the honeymoon. When shopping for a honeymoon destination, know what you can and can’t afford. Your honeymoon budget may narrow your options considerably, but it will help you ensure you aren’t spending your first trip as a married couple pinching pennies. • Play around with the length of your trip. Many couples aim to spend at least one week on their honeymoons. But one way to save money on the honeymoon or make a more expensive locale more affordable is to reduce the length of your stay. An extra two days in paradise might break your honeymoon budget, but what about a shorter stay? You will likely want to spend at least five days at your chosen destination, but a five-day trip can prove considerably less expensive than a full week, especially if you arrive and depart on a weekday. • Travel in the offseason. While many couples deserve an immediate getaway after planning and financing their weddings, you might get a better deal if you delay your honeymoon until the offseason, when resorts tend to offer more attractive packages after the tourist season has peaked. A honeymoon in the offseason is likely to offer more privacy than one taken during the peak of the season, so you might find such a honeymoon is more romantic. If you do decide to delay your honeymoon, you might still want to plan a short getaway to a nearby locale for a few days after you tie the knot. Even a short trip can help you unwind after all that planning and coordinating. • Establish a honeymoon registry. In addition to who’s paying for the wedding, one of the ways in which today’s couples are different from those of yesteryear is the fact that many couples now live together before tying the knot. That reality has made the traditional registry somewhat obsolete, as many of today’s couples already own their own furniture and already have a fully stocked kitchen. But couples can still have a honeymoon registry, which
allows their guests to donate money they would otherwise be spending on a wedding gift to a fund that will be used specifically to fund the couple’s honeymoon and any adventures they choose to enjoy on their trip. Guests may even prefer such a registry, as it saves them the trouble of wrapping a gift and carrying it to the wedding while ensuring the happy couple will truly enjoy their gift. A couple’s honeymoon is a great opportunity to unwind and enjoy some rest and relaxation on their first trip together as man and wife. And by putting a few savvy suggestions to good use, couples can ensure their honeymoon is all they hoped it would be and much, much more.
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TIPS FOR SELECTING
wedding day flowers What would a wedding day be without flowers? The beauty and the aroma of fresh-cut flowers can create a welcoming atmosphere and complement the beauty and the style of a wedding wardrobe. Flowers are often the first things that guests see upon arriving for the ceremony, and they may even be something guests take home at the end of the night. Flowers create an air of romance, and most couples want to make flowers — whether fresh or silk — an integral part of their wedding day. As with any decision when planning a wedding, choosing the right flowers requires some research and a basic knowledge of which flowers will convey the message and the theme of your wedding. The number of colors, textures and combinations that can be created are so numerous that couples may feel the decision on the floral arrangements is best left to the florist. But it doesn’t take a lot of expertise to know what you want, and it is important for couples to convey their feelings to the florist. Consider these tips when choosing a florist and selecting flowers. • Experts advise that a couple start looking for a florist at least six months before the wedding, especially if the wedding will take place during the peak season of May through September. Get recommendations from friends as to which florist they used or find out if your wedding planner or banquet hall manager recommends a particular florist. Some catering halls have agreements with florists, and they work together. • Browse magazines to get ideas of what you like. You also may be able to find a florist through an advertisement or if he or she has been featured in publications. Keep a scrapbook of the colors, types of flowers and arrangements and any other ideas that attract you so you will be able to present this information to the florist. • Establish your flower budget prior to sitting down with the florist. You should expect to pay at least 8 percent of the total wedding cost on flowers. Get an estimate on the floral arrangement and then tweak your needs according to your budget. Many florists can modify arrangements and find a middle ground with regard to cost. Selecting flowers that are in-season will result in more affordable rates than if you desire exotic or out-ofseason blooms. • Once you’ve hired the florist, you can come up with a wedding flower worksheet that establishes all of your needs. The florist may ask for specific information, such as photos of the bride’s gown as well as the colors and styles that the wedding party will be wearing. A good florist knows that a bouquet should not overpower or detract from the beauty of the bride. The florist may want to mimic textures from the dress, such as beading, with smaller flowers or berries within the arrangement. The groom’s boutonniere is traditionally one of the flowers from the bride’s bouquet so that the look is cohesive. • Ceremony flowers may be traditional, and some houses of
worship have strict guidelines as to what can and cannot be used. However, reception flowers can be where you show off your creativity and whimsy. After all, this is a party and it should be fun. You may want to give the florist more freedom of expression with regard to reception centerpieces and flowers that adorn other areas of the room. • Because receptions tend to take place in the evening hours and are often indoor affairs, experts say that added lighting may be needed to put emphasis on the floral centerpieces and help present them in their best light. You may want to think about hiring a lighting designer to spotlight some areas of the room or at the very least incorporate candlelight into your centerpiece arrangements. • To give the impression that there are more flowers than there really are, use fragrance and filler as your tools. Fragrant flowers can fill up the room with a welcoming aroma. Look for frangipani, lilies, hyacinths, jasmine, and sweet peas for a big impact. Florists know how to stretch arrangements by using greenery and other filler to lend bulk without too much extra cost. • Experienced florists will know how long it takes certain buds to open and show off their maximum beauty. Therefore, expect a florist to be working on your floral arrangements as much as a week before the wedding date — purchasing containers, cleaning flowers and waiting for certain ones to open fully. Minimize changes close to your wedding date as most things will already be started. • It is possible to make your own centerpieces or bouquets if you so desire. Simplicity will work best for the novice. Think about grouping similar-hued calla lilies together for a bridal bouquet. Hydrangea and peonies are larger flowers that can easily fill up a vessel on a table as a centerpiece. White flowers will coordinate with any color scheme and could be the easiest to mix and match. White blooms include sweet pea, rose, camellia, stephanotis, narcissus, gardenia, orchid, lily of the valley, jasmine, and gypsophila. Flowers are one component of the wedding that will help achieve the magic and beautiful atmosphere couples desire.
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seating arrangements
TIPS FOR MAKING
One of the biggest decisions couples make regarding their wedding receptions concerns where to seat their guests. Many a bride and groom has felt the crunch of compiling responses and then coming up with an acceptable seating arrangement for the reception. Seating guests is not a task exclusive to brides- and grooms-to-be. Anyone holding a special party, whether it’s at a reception hall or a restaurant, must determine seating arrangements. Before you begin to make seating arrangements, you will need the entire list of people attending the event. Having a final headcount is essential. While you may want to do a seating chart early into the reception planning, it’s best left until a few weeks before your wedding day, when you know who will and will not be in attendance. Next, know the number of tables you will be alloted in the party space. A catering hall may have a set number of seats that can fit at each table and can usually provide you with a map of the room or a blank seating chart. Many standard reception tables can comfortably 20 FEBRUARY - MARCH 2014 • A SUPPLEMENT TO THE ITEM
seat between eight to 10 people. Squeezing in more people can make for an uncomfortable dining experience. If you are a visual person, you may benefit from writing guests’ names on small pieces of paper and physically moving them around your seating chart, much as you would do if you were trying to arrange furniture on a room layout. Otherwise, write things down as you plan. When arranging the seating, figure out the head or bridal table. This is one of the easier tables to seat because it is traditionally filled with members of your bridal party and their respective spouses or dates. If your bridal party is especially large, consider flanking your own sweetheart table with two tables for the bridal party on either side. After arranging the bridal table, focus on seating parents and close relatives of the bride and groom next. Many couples prefer to separate their families at the wedding, so the groom’s family may sit
on one side of the room and the bride’s family will sit on the other. This means there will be two parental tables. Consider seating grandparents or other close family members at these tables to ensure they have a place of prominence in the room. This usually means being close to the dance floor to have a good view of all of the festivities. If your parents are divorced or there are any other strained feelings among parents, you can further separate into another table for stepparents, to avoid any unpleasantness or confrontation. Many wedding receptions are full of friends and even coworkers of parents whom the couple tying the knot does not even know. You may need further clarification of their relationships and who gets along before seating them. In fact, ask a parent to take care of arranging their own friends so you will be certain the arrangements will be comfortable for everyone. A friends’ table is usually a mingling of friends or your own coworkers who are of similar ages. A friends’ table can make guests who arrived solo feel more comfortable because they can converse with others who are like-minded. Seating children can be tricky. You may be inclined to seat youngsters at their own table, which is fine if the children are mature enough to handle sitting by themselves. But young children sitting apart from their parents may be nervous. Furthermore, the parents will continually have to get up and check on the kids. Very young children are best seated alongside their folks. When arranging seating, you also must consider special needs’ individuals who may have mobility issues. Such individuals should be seated near doors and restrooms so it’s easier for them to get around once the reception hits full swing. Try to accommodate special requests, like not seating the elderly too close to music speakers. Keep in mind that there is software and even some smartphone apps that make it even easier to make seating arrangements. Tech-savvy couples may prefer this method to the old-fashioned pencil and paper technique.
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origins of the term honeymoon It has become tradition for married couples to jet off on a post-wedding vacation. This honeymoon is a way for the bride and groom to enjoy quiet time together and start off their married life together on an intimate level. Although the word “honeymoon” has happy connotations today, the original meanings of the word may not be so blissful. There are varying accounts of the evolution of the word
“honeymoon,” but many believe it to be a Norse tradition deriving from the word “hjunottsmanathr.” Northern European history describes women being abducted from their families and forced into marriage with a man from a neighboring village. This husband would take his new bride into hiding and stay there for a while until it was certain the bride’s family had given up the hunt and retreated. It was also tradition
for Scandinavian couples to drink a sweet, honey-infused wine known as mead for a month after getting married. This may be where the “honey,” for the sweet drink, and the “moon,” for the one-month period of time, originated. Others say “honeymoon” refers to a sarcastic quip that a marriage starts out sweet as honey, but then wanes much as the moon will each cycle.
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