FRIDAY • MARCH 2, 2012
ISSUE 31 • VOLUME 123
THE STUDENT NEWSPAPER OF THE UNIVERSITY OF CHICAGO SINCE 1892
CHICAGOMAROON.COM
Admins meet with students over Pierce plumbing woes Lina Li News Staff University administrators met with Pierce residents twice this week in response to student outrage over the repeated breakdowns in the dormitory’s plumbing system and other persistent maintenance issues that have occurred throughout the year. Housing and campus life administrators convened an open forum Tuesday evening with Pierce residents and staff, where they promised that extensive plumbing repairs would occur during spring and summer vacations. In addition, administrators announced plans to replace carpeting in house lounges, repaint common area walls, provide new furniture for house lounges and study rooms, treat windows, replace mattresses in dorm rooms, renovate house kitchens, and upgrade the dorm’s previous student-run snack bar area. The upgrades are intended to occur alongside—not as a substitution for— plumbing repairs. The meetings were spurred by an incident early Monday morning when a toilet erupted in a 10th floor bathroom, coinciding with a water outage and an elevator malfunction in the building. Associate Vice President for Campus Life Karen Warren-Coleman, one of the administrators who attended the meeting, said that while the University would make repairs, it had
not yet decided how comprehensive the renovations would be. “We’re committed to making Pierce operational,” Warren-Coleman said. “Pierce is stuck in the question of University next-step commitments.... We’re in the process now of thinking of a new dorm and where Pierce fits into that conversation.” In a smaller meeting with an interim student working group on Wednesday, University Executive Vice President David Greene presented plans for a new $200 million residential complex, likely to be located on the current Pierce lot. Students at the Wednesday meeting declined to comment on specific proposals discussed, but released a statement addressing the ongoing dialogue with administrators. “As a group representing the majority of Pierce students, we are pleased to see the administration take our concerns seriously. Over the past week, we have had two meetings with members of the administration, in which promises were made to make a significant contribution to bettering the quality of student life in Pierce,” the statement said. The students added that they would have another meeting with administrators today regarding details for repairs to the plumbing system. Warren-Coleman promised another open forum, similar to the one held Tuesday, in the first week following PIERCE continued on page 3
Kalven report examined, questioned at open forum
From left to right: Law School professor Geoffrey Stone, Executive Vice President David Greene, political science professor Cathy Cohen, and political science department Chair Bernard Harcourt during a SG open forum on the Kalven report Wednesday evening. JOHNNY HUNG | THE CHICAGO MAROON
Tiantian Zhang News Staff Faculty from the Law School and the College and a high-ranking University administrator took opposing but measured stances on the University’s continued invocation of the Kalven report at an SG-sponsored open forum Wednesday night in the Social Sciences building. For more than an hour, audience members examined the 45-year-old document, presenting the forum’s four panelists with hypothetical situations on which the report’s doctrine of political
neutrality might have an effect. Executive Vice President of the University David Greene defended the document, attributing to its ideas a growing culture of pluralism on campus. “Something is very different in the University,” Greene said. “There is a lot of tolerance for ideas across the spectrum. I think it is really important not to ignore that and not to take it for granted. It is much of the Kalven report that has played some positive effects in ensuring that [tolerance] continues.” Political science professor Cathy Cohen joined Greene in claiming that
the report protects intellectual freedom on campus. However, she said, “The University has multiple missions and roles. There are ways that the University acts as corporate actor. The Kalven report doesn’t give us much guidance or helpful guidance about how to act as a corporate entity.” The complications that arise at the intersection of politics, academics, and the University’s corporate dealings have been at the forefront of student criticism in recent years, culminating in repeated demands for a Socially Responsible InKALVEN continued on page 2
Activists declare victory over closure of coal plants Student non profit makes Janet De La Torre News Contributor
Rahm Emanuel announced plans to close the Fisk coal plant in Pilsen (pictured) and the Crawford coal plant in Little Village by 2014. JAMIE MANLEY | THE CHICAGO MAROON
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Temperatures in Fahrenheit - Courtesy of The Weather Channel
Students in the RSO University Climate Action Network (UCAN) celebrated the long-awaited closure of two Chicago coal plants with about 100 community members in Pilsen Thursday morning. Midwest Generation, a subsidiary of Edison International, announced on Wednesday the closure of its Fisk and Crawford Plants after months of negotiations between the power company, the City of Chicago, and a coalition of individuals and organizations. Chicago is the only major metropolis in the nation with coal plants within city limits. Previous plans called for the plants to shut down in 2015 and 2018, but collaborative pressure from activists and City Hall moved the process forward. Fisk is scheduled to be retired at the end of this year, while Crawford will close in 2014.
Mayor Rahm Emanuel, who promised during his election campaign to clean up or close the plants, brokered the agreement. In return, environmental groups have agreed to drop a lawsuit against Midwest Generation. Second-year Chris Hester, recruitment coordinator of UCAN, has been involved with the campaign since he arrived at the University. “It really affects the Chicagoland community. These coal plants kill more that 40 people a year,” Hester said. The initiative began 10 years ago, when a 2002 Harvard study revealed the extent to which the coal plants were negatively impacting the community’s health. Further research from the Clean Air Task Force, an environmental research and advocacy nonprofit, found that pollution from the two plants caused 42 premature deaths, 66 heart attacks, and 720 asthma attacks each year. UCAN continued on page 2
finals in White House contest Angela Li News Contributor Moneythink, a national nonprofit organization that started as an RSO here, has advanced to the final round of the White House’s Campus Champions of Change Challenge, beating out 1,400 applicants for one of 15 finalist spots. The competition recognizes outstanding student groups in colleges and universities throughout the U.S. The winner will be determined based on the number of votes each organization garners online. The five top-voted groups will be invited to the White House and featured on mtvU and MTV Act, two subsidiaries of MTV that focus on student life and activism. They will also have the opportunity to host an
episode of mtvU’s “The Dean’s List.” Moneythink puts undergraduates in the classrooms of local high school juniors and seniors, instructing students in financial literacy and entrepreneurship. Fourthyear Ted Gonder, executive director and co-founder of Moneythink, hopes that winning the competition will “get [Moneythink’s model] in front of important officials and elevate financial education and peer mentorship as solutions worthy of national prioritization,” he said in an e-mail. The organization, which originated as a service arm of the investment RSO Blue Chips, became a separate RSO in 2009 and a nonprofit in October 2010. Currently run on volunteer power alone, Moneythink CONTEST continued on page 3
IN ARTS
IN SPORTS
If Shakespeare be a labor of love, play on » Page 6
Great Scot! Maroons host Monmouth in first round of NCAAs » Page 12
Predictability keeps Wanderlust stuck on the ground » Page 6
In Greencastle, a quest to rule the court » Page 12
THE CHICAGO MAROON | NEWS | March 2, 2012
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Alaska Lt. Gov. argues for mining state’s natural resources
Alaska Lieutenant Governor Mead Treadwell gives a talk about Alaskan oil reserves at The Harris School of Public Policy Studies on Wednesday. TIFFANY TAN | THE CHICAGO MAROON
Ankit Jain News Staff Alaska’s Lieutenant Governor Mead Treadwell defended his state’s desire to drill for oil on federal land within its borders, emphasizing the importance of arctic energy to America’s national interests at a talk Wednesday night at the Harris School for Public Policy. Treadwell started off his speech with a history lesson, hoping to put Alaska’s value to the rest of the
country in perspective. “When Secretary of State William Henry Seward proposed buying Alaska, it was met almost universally with guffaws from American citizens. It was called ‘Seward’s Ice Box’, or ‘Seward’s Folly’,” he said. “Well, we produce in a day what Alaska costs to buy, just on oil figures.” Treadwell called on Washington to allow the state government to exploit the natural resources that lie untapped on federal land. “We want to safely explore areas like the inter-
SG picks interim rep from 18 first-year candidates Giovanni Wrobel Associate News Editor In a frenzied race that had candidates spouting out 45-second campaign pitches in a packed Booth School lecture hall, the College Council (CC) voted last night on a replacement for first-year representative Ilknur Aliyev, choosing first-year Jaime Sanchez out of a pool of 18. Sanchez will serve as representative until the end of winter quarter and for the first four weeks of spring quarter, when SG will hold its slate and CC elections. Aliyev resigned last week for personal reasons, kicking off a frantic race for his seat that drew a rare number of candidates. “Everyone was equally qualified,” Sanchez said. “I think that I just got lucky, but to be honest I also think that I can definitely promote dialogue, and that’s what I’m here for.” Although only in an interim position, Sanchez believes that he will still be able to provide valuable insights based on his background as a minority student and an active member of
the community. In the short time he was allotted to make his case, Sanchez brought up his internship in the office of 20th-Ward alderman Willie Cochran, which he said has given him a unique perspective outside of the ivory tower working closely with local issues. He even touched on the issue of trauma care at the University of Chicago Medical Center, arguing that he would be a voice for community members regarding an issue that University administrators and students have grappled with for years. “You can bet that the people in the community also have a voice for that, but you don’t hear it and you can lose that voice of the surrounding community in decisions like that,” he said. SG President and fourth-year Youssef Kalad was not surprised that so many first-years jumped on the opportunity tp serve as a CC representative. “We worked really hard this O-Week to reach out to first-years, to get them excited,” he said.
Harcourt: “Nothing is neutral” KALVEN continued from front
vestment Committee. Other panelists were more direct in expressing their reservations about the document. Chair of the Political Science Department Bernard Harcourt complained that, in many instances, the Kalven report actually cuts short the conversation, being called upon too often as a catchall response to legitimate concerns about complicated ethical dilemmas. “Nothing is neutral, and there’s no way to be neutral,” he said. “I’m frustrated when the issue often comes to the Kalven report, instead of trying to figure out how to create something that we can all feel is a proper reflection of our
community.” Law School professor and former provost Geoffrey Stone, in his concluding remarks, voiced caution about the University’s ongoing reliance on the document, even as he seemed to agree with Greene. “It structures the conversations for the University. It promotes debate. It doesn’t stifle debate. But it runs great risks in damaging the long-term culture of the institution,” he said. Several prominent administrators attended the forum as audience members, including Associate Vice President for Student Life Kim GoffCrews, Associate Dean of the College Eleanor Daugherty, and Dean of Students in the College Susan Art.
continental shelf, the National Petroleum ReserveAlaska, the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge, and some of the foothill areas that all are on federal land. In order to get access to federal land’ we have to get the votes in Congress,” he said. “We’d like access to federal land so we can help America be energy independent.” Inevitably, the issue of environmental conservation arose. Treadwell defended oil exploration from charges of ecological harm, claiming that advances in extraction techniques and technology would minimize the damage. Alaska is also an abundant source of renewable energy, Treadwell said, which the state has been aggressively trying to develop. “We’ve established a goal of, by 2025, having 50 percent or more of the energy use in the state come from renewable energy sources. And frankly, we’d like to go more,” he said. Meanwhile, Treadwell rejected top-down approaches to combating climate change, dubbing cap-and-trade as a “one-size-fits-all” strategy that is “impossible to achieve.” Treadwell also found a silver lining in global warming, explaining that the recession of ice in the Northwest Passage may open up valuable shipping routes to East Asia and Russia. “You’ve got a pretty important asset here,” he said. “Don’t just look at it through the environmental lens.” Treadwell’s talk was sponsored by the University of Chicago Rotary Club.
Closing coal plants were exempt from clean air legislation UCAN continued from front
Built in 1903 and 1924, respectively, the Fisk plant in Pilsen and the Crawford plant in Little Village are among the oldest coal-fired power stations in the country. The two plants have been continuously retrofitted, and were grandfathered out of the regulations of the Clean Air Act, a 1970 federal law to regulate air quality and control pollution. Kimberly Wasserman, executive director of the Little Village Environmental Justice Organization, claims that both of her young sons have asthma caused by the pollution from the plants. She congratulated the organizations that were involved in the project. “There are people who have fought day and night, and stayed in the campaign when no one else believed in us,” Wasserman said. A number of grassroots organizations, including the Chicago Clean Power Coalition, Chicago Youth Climate Coalition, and the Pilsen Alliance, joined the campaign to shut down the plants. UCAN has participated in marches and rallies toward that end since its founding last year. Activists see the closure of the two plants as a success that will benefit Chicago residents. UCAN, joining other activists and Emanuel, will celebrate a “historical moment” in the campaign in Pilsen at a victory party on Saturday.
Celebrity donation supports local pastor’s dream Jennifer Standish News Staff Having spent 94 days braving the Chicago winter in a tent atop an abandoned motel in Woodlawn, Corey Brooks was able to come down to ground level last Friday, after a spontaneous donation from filmmaker and producer Tyler Perry brought him $100,000 closer to his goal of converting the building into a community center. Brooks, a pastor of the New Beginnings Church in Woodlawn, had camped out on the roof of the Super 8 Motel on East 66th Street and Martin Luther King, Jr. Drive since last November, having pledged to stay until he could raise $450,000, enough money to purchase the building. Brooks, will use Perry’s donation to tear down the motel and turn it into a community center. The center will be the core of Brooks’s Project H.O.O.D. (Helping Others Obtain Destiny), which will provide community recreational facilities, mixedincome housing, and support for local business and restaurants. Perry was inspired to donate after
hearing about Brooks’s campaign on a national radio program, The Tom Joyner Morning Show. The radio show was giving away the motorcycle from Perry’s new movie, Good Deeds, to a church leader dedicated to his community, and a member of Brooks’s congregation had nominated him in the contest. Brooks won the motorcycle, and when Perry heard about his campaign, he called to verify the story and decided he wanted to get Brooks off the roof. “I’ve learned that people are compassionate, sometimes more than we really realize, and oftentimes the reason why people don’t help as often is because they are not aware of certain situations,” Brooks said. “If they are aware, they are not aware of the severity of it, and when people realized the severity of an issue and how bad it is, as humans we tend to rise to the occasion.” Now that the church has surpassed its target amount, it can buy the motel from its current owner, businessman Venood Patel, who owes a $1.5 million mortgage on the building to Family Bank and Republic Bank and Trust. According to Brooks, he and Patel negotiated a deal
with the bank, allowing the church to buy the building for $450,000 in cash. The papers to turn the ownership of the motel over to New Beginnings Church, originally scheduled to be signed March 31, can now be signed March 6 because of Perry’s donation. Construction of the community center itself is estimated to cost $15 million. According to Brooks, the church plans to continue employing social media and word of mouth to bring in donations from community businesses and individual donors. Brooks also plans to apply for a grant from the city to subsidize some of the costs of building the center. Mayor Rahm Emanuel called Brooks while he was on the roof on November 28, commending his efforts to end violence in the South Side community. Since Perry’s donation, Project H.O.O.D. has received additional gifts of $10,000 and $85,000. Brooks is optimistic and believes that after being informed of the benefits of the center for the South Side community, residents will help his cause. “People will again rise to the occasion,” he said.
Nadler cracks the spine of library’s history Ben Pokross Senior News Staff Director of the University Library Judith Nadler spoke about the past and future of the U of C Library System on Wednesday evening. Nadler, who has worked at the library since 1966 and been the director since 2004, discussed the history of the library system at the University, from John D. Rockefeller’s founding book collection to the recent opening of the Joe and Rika Mansueto Library. She described the transformations of the library over time as having been largely around centralization and expansion, citing the opening of the Regenstein Library in 1970 as the most important step in this process.
More recent challenges for the library stem from technological transformations that have led to catalogues and collections being increasingly digitalized. “The 21st century has not caught us unawares,” she said, “but I don’t think anyone could have envisioned the magnitude of change and the pace of change.” Nadler is confident in the ways that the library has adjusted to changing times and needs. “I believe that in looking back, we have a very successful history in doing everything and doing it well,” she said. The main reasons for the library’s success, Nadler said, have been the research focus of the library, its centralization, and its culture of respect for the past. Nadler has great hopes for the future
of the library, telling the audience that the library will continue to flourish, “if we are informed, but not encumbered, by the past.” Those who attended the talk were also able to see a document from the 17th century that is the only contemporaneous recording of the famous, and perhaps apocryphal, story of Isaac Newton’s discovery of gravity while sitting under an apple tree. The Special Collections Research Center had put the document on display for the event. Those who have helped build the U of C, Nadler said, would celebrate the library that they would see today. “The presidents and directors of the library that came before us...if they were here, they would be proud.”
THE CHICAGO MAROON | NEWS | March 2, 2012
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Law prof assesses civil liberties rulings from Supreme Court Moneythink has taught “The government will have a difficult time prevailing,� Strauss predicted. “It’ll be difficult for them to explain why it is unconstitutional, beyond the fact that they don’t like it and that it interferes with their policies.� Strauss turned to reviewing the past year, highlighting many First Amendment cases. Last year, the Court ruled that demonstrations at a military funeral are constitutional in Snyder v. Phelps, a victory for the rights of protesters. Arizona Free Enterprise Club v. Bennett also upheld First Amendment rights, prohibiting the state to equalize public funds with private contributions amassed by campaigns that opt out of public funding. Strauss noted Federal Communications Commission v. Fox, which struck down the FCC’s ban of “indecency� in language on television. He also discussed the Court’s ruling of concealed GPS devices as a violation of Fourth Amendment protection from “unreasonable search� in United States v. Jones. Fourth-year Ricky Zacharias, president of UC Dems, one of the event’s co-sponsors, said that the overview was informative and accessible for those unfamiliar with the Court’s activities. “It’s easy for cases to pass you by, especially if you don’t have time to listen to NPR every day. All in all, this was a great primer for everyone looking to keep up with the Court,� Zacharias said. Strauss joined the faculty of the Law School in 1985 and is an editor of the Supreme Court Review. He has argued 18 cases before the Supreme Court.
Law school professor David Strauss gives a talk about the Supreme Court’s rulings on civil liberties cases over the past year. JOHNNY HUNG | THE CHICAGO MAROON
Alexandra Garfinkle News Staff Gerald Ratner Distinguished Service Professor of Law David Strauss delivered the third annual State of the Supreme Court lecture Tuesday night, focusing on court decisions that have
affected civil liberties over the last year. Strauss looked to an upcoming case on the Court’s docket with U.S. v. Arizona, which will be heard in April, and will decide whether Arizona’s recently implemented immigration laws are unconstitutional due to an alleged conflict with federal laws.
more than 1,700 students
CONTEST continued from front
plans to make the transition into a professional organization in June, according to Gonder. Students enrolled in Moneythink mentorships work on developing one profitable venture over the course of several weekly sessions. Past projects have ranged from lemonade stands to a clothing store to services, such as organizing a school dance, according to an article in The Chronicle of Higher Education. Since its establishment, Moneythink has worked with more
than 1,700 urban high school students and has spread to 17 schools in the country, including Stanford, Columbia, and Northwestern. As of press time, Moneythink is sitting in sixth place with more than 12,000 votes, although the first-place competitor, a food pantry for students run out of the University of Arkansas, has almost three times that amount. One other project in the running is focused on finance: a microloan initiative operated out of Grinnell College.
Goff-Crews offers to spend a night in Pierce PIERCE continued from front
spring break, after several scheduled repairs during the vacation. During the Tuesday meeting, students repeatedly demanded monetary compensation for the inconveniences— requests which were met with applause. Both Warren-Coleman and Assistant Vice President for Campus Life Katie Callow-Wright refrained from making guarantees. However, in the Wednesday meeting, Callow-Wright, Greene, and Chief Financial Officer Nim Chinniah promised “some form of compensation� for students. To ensure accountability, Executive Director of Operations for Facilities Services Joel Schriever and Callow-
Wright offered to provide students with a timeline for intended repairs. GoffCrews also noted that the Board of Trustees had been notified of the conditions in Pierce. Throughout the week, upper-level administrators have toured Pierce, and Housing Services has established a Web site for Pierce updates. Schriever has promised to terminate and renegotiate its contract with the company that maintains Pierce’s elevators, and plans have been made for emergency interim housing in Henry Crown Field House if dangerous conditions persist or worsen. Goff-Crews offered to spend a night in the dormitory, a promise she will keep if a bed can be found for her, she said.
By Rebecca Guterman
Weekly Crime Report
This is a series the Maroon publishes summarizing instances of campus crime. Each week details a few notable crimes, in addition to keeping a running count from January 1. The focus is on crimes within the UCPD patrol area, which runs from East 39th to 64th Streets and South Cottage Grove to Lake Shore Drive. Here are this week’s notables :
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VIEWPOINTS
Editorial & Op-Ed MARCH 2, 2012
Invest with competence The University should consult its community in re-evaluating how the Kalven report is interpreted The student newspaper of the University of Chicago since 1892 ADAM JANOFSKY Editor-in-Chief CAMILLE VAN HORNE Managing Editor MAHMOUD BAHRANI Senior Editor JONATHAN LAI News Editor HARUNOBU CORYNE News Editor SAM LEVINE News Editor EMILY WANG Viewpoints Editor CHARNA ALBERT Arts Editor DANIEL LEWIS Sports Editor VICENTE FERNANDEZ Sports Editor DOUGLAS EVERSON, JR Head Designer KEVIN WANG Web Editor ALICE BLACKWOOD Head Copy Editor DON HO Head Copy Editor GABE VALLEY Head Copy Editor DARREN LEOW Photo Editor JAMIE MANLEY Photo Editor
Students gathered Wednesday at SG’s open forum to discuss the Kalven report, the University’s long-standing document outlining its stance as a politically and socially neutral institution. In the 50 years since its publication, the Kalven report has not been the “point of departure” it asserts itself to be, but rather has been cited by the University to justify investment in businesses working in Sudan and apartheid South Africa, among other actions. Given its checkered past, the University is past due for a serious reevaluation of the document’s effectiveness. Along these lines, it is crucial that it looks inward to address the critical political and social issues that arise in the course of its decision making as a corporate entity. The Kalven report’s statements regarding the absolute protection of individual freedom of speech are
laudable; the University should not be free to presume that students or faculty members adhere to its implied stance on any political or social issue. That said, the University cannot simply use the report as a means to disregard all consequences of its investments under the guise of neutrality. The Kalven report states that there are “exceptional instance[s]” where University corporate actions, including investments, may “appear so incompatible with paramount social values as to require careful assessment of the consequences,” but makes no attempt to define what those instances are. If the University does not deem genocide in Darfur “incompatible with paramount social values,” it is clear that its current rubric needs work. The community can help to ensure this exception to the report is not a fiction in practice. Although getting community input
is not the simplest task, it is imperative that this be an inclusive process. Because the Kalven report is supposed to protect faculty views, it would be in the University’s best interest to engage faculty in serious dialogue on the relationship between decisions made by the University in its corporate capacity and their effect on the academic sphere. The bi-quarterly Council of the University Senate meetings would be an opportune time to do this. Along those same lines, students, as an integral part of the University and future donors to its endowment, also have a right to be heard. Student-run committees such as the proposed Socially Responsible Investment Committee (SRIC), which was approved by referendum last year but dismissed by administrators, would be the ideal way to incorporate student input into the University decision
making process. They would provide a forum for communication regarding current controversial issues, such as investments in Arch Coal, Inc. and HEI Hotels. The debates that would result from these measures would go a long way to foster the kind of discourse the Kalven report was created to defend. Ultimately, the University must recognize that political neutrality is an impossibility; all of its decisions have a political dimension. Administrators must accordingly alter the procedure for determining instances in which its corporate activities are incompatible with fundamental social values of its community.
The Editorial Board consists of the Editor-in-Chief, Viewpoints Editors, and an additional Editorial Board member.
REBECCA GUTERMAN Assoc. News Editor LINDA QIU Assoc. News Editor CRYSTAL TSOI Assoc. News Editor GIOVANNI WROBEL Assoc. News Editor AJAY BATRA Assoc. Viewpoints Editor DAVID KANER Assoc. Viewpoints Editor
A courageous precedent Current GOP candidates are failing to live up to their party’s audacious beginnings
TOMI OBARO Assoc. Arts Editor MATTHEW SCHAEFER Assoc. Sports Editor SYDNEY COMBS Assoc. Photo Editor TIFFANY TAN Assoc. Photo Editor TYRONALD JORDAN Business Manager VIVIAN HUA Undergraduate Business Executive VINCENT MCGILL Delivery Coordinator HAYLEY LAMBERSON Ed. Board Member HYEONG-SUN CHO Designer SONIA DHAWAN Designer ALYSSA LAWTHER Designer SARAH LI Designer
By Anastasia Golovashkina Viewpoints Columnist
AUTUMN NI Designer AMITA PRABHU Designer BELLA WU Designer KELSIE ANDERSON Copy Editor CATIE ARBONA Copy Editor AMISHI BAJAJ Copy Editor JANE BARTMAN Copy Editor MARTIA BRADLEY Copy Editor ELIZABETH BYNUM Copy Editor ALAN HASSLER Copy Editor NISHANTH IYENGAR Copy Editor MICHELLE LEE Copy Editor KATIE MOCK Copy Editor JEN XIA Copy Editor ESTHER YU Copy Editor
Just four contestants remain on the VH1 reality show that the Republican presidential primaries have unfortunately become. Part of this past week’s debate called on each of the candidates to describe himself in just one word—and for once, they got something right. Rick Santorum, for example, picked “courage.” Though it’s a strong word that’s prone to political misuse, “courage” might just be Santorum’s new middle name. He’s fearless in the face of popular opposition, unafraid to issue stringent ultimatums on
practically every aspect of social and civic life. From abortion to contraceptives, education to inequality, and race to religion, Santorum won’t hesitate to tell you exactly what he believes. Moreover, he believes that his views should be imposed on everyone else in the United States, including our nowdeceased founding fathers. As he told ABC News in a recent interview, “I don’t believe in an America where the separation of church and state are absolute.” Ask Santorum about contraceptives, and he will tell you that “it’s not OK” because “it’s a license to do things in a sexual realm that is counter to how things are supposed to be.” (For more information on “how things are supposed to be,” please contact God.) Talk to him about abortion, and he’ll tell you that it’s “murder,” even in the case of rape or incest. “You need to make the best out of a bad situation,” he explains. On the surface, Santorum embodies all of the qualities of a strong conservative candidate—he’s candid, he’s committed, he’s religious. He has a very real (and
very frightening) chance of winning the nomination. He’s courageous and he knows it (though, despite having wigglewiggled his way to seven kids, he’s still not very sexy—and he probably knows that, too). But Santorum’s courage is completely and utterly misguided. Rather than commit himself to “expanding opportunities to promote [economic] prosperity,” “developing a flexible and innovative workforce,” or “meeting college costs” by making college more affordable—goals outlined explicitly in the GOP’s 2008 platform (the most recent one until the Republican National Convention this summer)—Santorum has chosen to take a stance against equal opportunity, against innovation, and against affordable college education. Indeed, it seems that Santorum, along with the Republicans’ three other presidential prospects, didn’t get the memo. Not one of these candidates is electable, and not one of these candidates deserves to be president. Instead, these primaries have devolved into a four-man race to
out-conservative and out-radical one another, making for an unpalatable set of options. Despite the blatant problems of Santorum’s “courageous” approach, it was nonetheless courage that got the Republican party started in the first place. Founded in 1854 by a circle of exWhigs frustrated with the flagrant flaws and blatant un-electability of their political party, the Republican party took just two presidential elections to send a man to the White House. Lincoln’s 1860 triumph marked the end of his party’s remarkably quick growth from a thirdparty also-ran to part of an enduring two-party system in just six years. So who says that it can’t be done again? Though we’ve spent the better part of this election cycle fixating on the ways in which Republican voters can “make do” with current options, perhaps sticking to the current status quo isn’t the best course of action altogether. It’s certainly not the Republicans’ only option; notCOURAGE continued on page 5
BEN ZIGTERMAN Copy Editor
Hit the elect button Republicans need to keep their eye on the prize—unseating President Obama
The Chicago Maroon is published twice weekly during autumn, winter, and spring quarters Circulation: 5,500. The opinions expressed in the Viewpoints section are not necessarily those of the Maroon. © 2012 The Chicago Maroon, Ida Noyes Hall, 1212 East 59th Street Chicago, IL 60637 Editor-in-Chief Phone: 773.834.1611 Newsroom Phone: 773.702.1403 Business Phone: 773.702.9555 Fax: 773.702.3032 CONTACT News: News@ChicagoMaroon.com Viewpoints: Viewpoints@ChicagoMaroon.com Arts: Arts@ChicagoMaroon.com Sports: Sports@ChicagoMaroon.com Photography: Photo@ChicagoMaroon.com Design: Douglas@ChicagoMaroon.com Copy: CopyEditors@ChicagoMaroon.com Advertising: Ads@ChicagoMaroon.com
By Eric Wessan Viewpoints Columnist The United States has an unemployment rate of 8.3 percent. President Barack Obama’s approval rating is around 47 percent or 43 percent, depending on who you ask; it’s definitely low. Election projections show that President Obama is tied with a ‘Generic Republican’ candidate. Despite this, polls show that President Obama is still beating GOP
front-runner Mitt Romney. Even with Romney’s two wins in Arizona and Michigan, the chance of a brokered or contested convention remains high. This is extremely disappointing, as it seems that the anybody-but-Romney Republicans may have succeeded in securing a second term for our sitting President. Mitt Romney once stood as a bastion of conservatism in the liberal state of Massachusetts. He has strong ties to electorally crucial areas like Michigan. He has been married (to the same woman) for 42 years and has held important jobs in both the private and public sectors. Romney has across-the-aisle appeal, and is a genuine American success story: he managed to create a very successful and profitable business. Additionally, he has a professional campaign that has been tested, can raise large sums of money,
and effectively utilizes Super PACs and 501(c)4 institutions. Yet, despite all of these plusses, there is still a division in the Grand Old Party. The Republicans have flitted from one alternative to another, leading to an all-time high of 10 different front-runners at different times in the campaign. New York Times pollster Nate Silver has claimed that this is the most volatile election in recent memory. Though there has been a plethora of less-than-suitable alternatives, Romney has remained a solid candidate throughout. The major issue with the Republican party currently seems to be shortsightedness. Similar to the primary processes that nominated Sharron Angle in Nevada and Christine O’Donnell in Delaware, there seems to be an inclination among more conservative-minded
Republicans to choose ideological purity over electability. While none of the candidates fits the profile of a true conservative, Romney should not be more offensive to conservative voters than the thrice-married Gingrich or big-government Santorum. However, for some reason, Republicans seem intent on making a faux stand, producing an ideologue who does not appeal to the center, yet eschews true conservative values, and who is, most importantly, unlikely to win. Despite his many advantages, Romney has been unable to pull ahead of his competitors, especially former Senator Rick Santorum. Santorum’s most recent surge came after a hat-trick victory in Minnesota, Colorado, and a non-binding victory in a poll in Missouri. This netted Santorum only 23 delegates out of 2,286, GOP continued on page 5
THE CHICAGO MAROON | VIEWPOINTS | March 2, 2012
Third-party past holds answer to present Republican woes
Romney is GOP’s best bet for general election
COURAGE continued from page 4 withstanding its “conservative” character, the GOP has a strong and proud history of shaping itself to fit the ever-changing concerns and circumstances of its constituents. It will take a lot of courage for current Republicans to put their time and trust (and trust funds) into a third party—a courage very different from that behind Santorum’s relentless bashing of all things secular or Romney’s shameless flip-flopping. It takes courage to depart from an apparently “safe” but ultimately self-destructive status quo: a commitment not just to electing a candidate, but to using the political framework to implement policies that will carry these United States toward a more peaceful, productive, successful, and innovative future. In the words of their own presidential prospect Rick Santorum, “You need to make the best out of a bad situation.” If the Republicans don’t, Santorum’s misguided mania might just be the only kind of “courage” they have left. Anastasia Golovashkina is a first-year in the College majoring in economics.
111 Year History
GOP continued from page 4 but still gave him a large momentum boost. Santorum considers himself to be strong on social issues but has a poor record when it comes to porkbarrel spending and earmarks. Many of his stances call for excessive government control over people’s private lives with regard to social issues. And then there’s his penchant to support unnecessary projects like the “Bridge to Nowhere.” In short, he is not the small government conservative he claims to be. Perhaps most importantly, Santorum is a former senator; he was unable to win re-election in 2006 against Bob Casey, Jr., a relative unknown. Pennsylvania has since elected another staunch conservative, Pat Toomey, to fill its other Senate seat. Given all these issues, Santorum is simply not a good option for Independents or even many Republicans and will not be able to reach across the aisle to woo rightleaning or blue-dog Democrats like Romney could. Currently, Romney has 153 Republican delegates, Santorum 70, Gingrich 33, and Paul 26. If Romney and the rest of the candidates split delegates based on current polling numbers, there will be a contested convention. While this situation is unlikely, it is likelier to happen now than at any point in the last 44 years. It would result in the Republican candidates spending money on the primaries that they could spend on the general election. Attack ads from each
Ravisloe Country Club
candidate will likely undermine the eventual nominee and provide fodder for when the race becomes one-on-one after the Republican National Convention. While primary elections can do little to raise the profile of a candidate at this point, the disapproval ratings of each of the primary candidates have risen steadily throughout the contests. The debates have made for good television—but the only true winner when the various Republican candidates go at one other is President Obama. The Republicans should collectively be trying to win this election. It is heartening to see Romney’s recent wins in Arizona and Michigan, but unless these are accompanied by a nationwide shift in support toward him, they will be for naught. Every antiRomney alternative sates a specific segment of the Republican party’s big tent. However, Mitt Romney is a better nominee than any of the alternatives not because of his niche strengths, but because his broader appeal gives him the best chance of winning. The nightmare scenario for Republicans should not be Romney winning the nomination, as some within the party have deigned it to be. Instead, it should be four more years of economic incompetence and foreign policy ineptitude under President Obama. Eric Wessan is a second-year in the College majoring in political science.
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A diner inconvenience Clarke’s fails to serve up the classic diner experience Joe Cronin Viewpoints Contributor The new Clarke’s sucks. Not because it serves bad food or because the service has been a bit slow, but because it hasn’t offered what it promised us: a diner. Diners aren’t about food or atmosphere. In fact, with their grease-soaked menus and frozen-in-time décor, diners inherently oppose the idea of giving you a unique culinary experience. No, diners bring something entirely different to the less-than-clean chrome counter: a place for public privacy. Public privacy, to me, is exactly what it sounds like. It’s all the intimacy and comfort of privacy nestled within the neutral distance of public space. Places that strike a balance between these poles are understandably hard to come by, but for me, real diners almost always do the trick. There’s a delicate balance between crowded and quiet required to hold private conversations in public. The place needs to be sufficiently populated for your conversation to diffuse and mingle with the other chatter, but at the same time it can’t be too full. Too crowded a place is off-putting; it forces you to speak up and listen hard, killing any intimacy. When the place is packed, it ceases to be, well, private. But you can’t expect a place to have just the right number of customers at any given time. That’s where the booth comes in. In proper diners, you always find those big, enclosed booths. They give you your own space. Even if they’re low booths, they’re generally either wound around dividing walls or relegated to the corners of the restaurant, preserving the effect. The other staple of diner seating, the counter, manages privacy fairly well, too. You might be out in the open sitting at the counter, but you’re staring at the grill, and in a small way you’ve still got your space. This is exactly where Clarke’s fails—it’s set up all wrong. The high ceilings and low-backed, tightly packed rows of booths simultaneously give the place a painful openness and subtle, optic claustrophobia. Look around and you’re instantly met with dozens of other gazes. Quiet down for a moment and the conversation at the next table starts to spill over. Granted, as time goes on and the novelty of the 24hour “diner” fades, the thick crowds will likely fade as well, but the open air and cluttered seating will remain. It will stay altogether too “public.” Not that a public feel is in itself a bad thing. After all, it’s half of “public privacy.” Whether it’s rooted in boredom or is really some illusory social pressure I just don’t understand, there’s a deep-seated need to “go out.” On any given weekend I can sit and talk to my roommate for hours, and no matter how good the conversation gets, there’s still a lingering feeling that I’m “wasting” an opportunity. Transplant this conversation to just about anywhere else, however, and suddenly we’ve made a night out of it. We have gone “out” and made something of our evening. When Monday rolls around and people ask, “What did you do this weekend?” I’ll still say, “Oh, just hung out with my roommate.” But inside, I know it was something more. I know I can proudly declare, “I went out! I go out! I participate in society!” Sure, that’s melodramatic, but it’s a real feeling. Privacy is great, but a lot of the time we need to be in public. Diners have both of these covered. You get the feeling of social openness while still enjoying the comfort and intimacy of privacy. To put it in diner terms, you can have your shitty, watery milkshake and drink it too. So, Clarke’s, you’re alright, but you’ve let me down. You promised me the diner I’ve always wanted, where I could wander in at 3 a.m., get a plate of disgusting, greasy fries and some weak coffee, and argue all night about whether bagels are to be eaten like sandwiches (they aren’t). I wanted Arnold’s! I wanted Monk’s Café! I wanted the place in Reservoir Dogs! Instead, you’ve given me another mildly overpriced eatery where I have to look at everybody. Seriously though, $10 for a tuna melt? That’s not a diner. Joe Cronin is a second-year in the College majoring in anthropology.
ARTS
Trivial Pursuits MARCH 2, 2012
If Shakespeare be a labor of love, play on
Fourth-year Erin Kelsey (left) and first-year Xan Belzley play Viola and Olivia in the Dean’s Men 1940s-set production of Twelfth Night. COURTESY OF UNIVERSITY THEATER
Sarah Miller Arts Staff Two years ago, Annie Considine suggested University Theater put on a production of Twelfth Night. Her proposition was rejected, but she said the initial denial was a “blessing in disguise,” as it allowed her to look at the script more extensively before assuming the role, now as a fourth-year, of director. The Dean’s Men, an RSO that exclusively puts on Shakespeare productions, will be performing Twelfth Night in conjunction with University Theater. Popular
past Dean’s Men productions include a post-apocalyptic rendition of Henry IV, Much Ado About Top Gun, and a version of Hamlet that revolved around the tragic events of 9/11. Normally set on the utopian island of Illyria, Twelfth Night is a comedy that most literary critics believe Shakespeare wrote for the Twelfth Night Festival. The play largely deals with the themes of mistaken identity, love, friendship, and gender roles, as twins Viola (Erin Kelsey) and Sebastian (Chris Deakin) find themselves shipwrecked and separated from one another after a
tumultuous storm. Sebastian searches for his lost sister along the Illyrian coast with his closest friend and sole companion Antonio (Adam Rosenthal). Meanwhile, fearing that her brother is dead, Viola decides to disguise herself as a man in order to join nobleman Orsino’s (Graham Albachten) court. Disguised as Cesario, Viola quickly wins Orsino’s heart, despite his infatuation with Lady Olivia (Xan Belzley) early in the play. Viola’s disturbance of the sleepy kingdom of Illyria sets off a series of potentially disastrous character attractions because of
her mistaken identity. Fourth-year Erin Kelsey said that Twelfth Night is one of her favorite plays: She first fell in love with it at the age of 14 and has hoped to play Viola ever since. Though she is no stranger to the Dean’s Men, this will be her first time playing a major female character in one of their Shakespearean productions. “The joke is that because I’ve played so many male roles during my time with the Dean’s Men…this role as Viola is just an extension of my past characters,” Kelsey said. Both Albachten and Kelsey said that they hoped to make the inevitable attraction between Viola and Orsino as clear as possible to the audience. “Usually when I see Twelfth Night, I am unsatisfied because Orsino’s and Cesario’s relationship is not approached in a serious way. The whole point of the play is that Orsino and Viola need to be together, and I would like to make that clear early on,” Albachten said. Fourth-year Tom Murphy, who directed UT’s production of Henry IV last quarter, said that he is looking forward to get back to acting with his role as Malvolio, a pompous steward and one of the play’s many comic relief characters. “Malvolio is the only one who is standing up to these people so interested in love, reminding them that there are more important things to life than just making merry. But another fun aspect of [Malvolio’s character] is that his stewardship, self-indulgence helps undo himself,” Murphy said. Keeping in line with the Dean’s
Men’s tradition of changing the usual setting of the Shakespeare plays they produce, Considine decided to give this play the more definite setting of a Mediterranean island during the 1940s. “What I like about Illyria is that it is an encapsulating paradise amid a sea of turmoil, and I chose the 1940s specifically because that was a tumultuous time in Europe, and I wanted the audience to get that contrast more easily,” Considine said.
TWELFTH NIGHT University Church Tonight, Saturday 8 p.m.–10 p.m.
The costumes consist mostly of pseudo-military outfits, and in the words of Albachten, other “slick” apparel. The main set piece will be a four-piece gazebo on wheels. In addition, the production will include plenty of singing and live music. Considine also said that she strategically cut the script in order to best display certain aspects of the characters that are typically less obvious. “For this production, character instruction has been a very intimate process because it involves providing characters with background, history, and blocking techniques,” Considine said. “This production is really fun. What really distinguishes this one is that it has a lot of heart. We’re definitely not cheating the serious moments because this play is not just funny: It’s a good story, and we have an incredible cast,” said Albachten.
Predictability keeps Wanderlust stuck on the ground Daniel Rivera Arts Staff Have you ever been to a bad stand-up show ? Where the entire night is just one prolonged moment of awkwardness, with the comedian standing onstage gripping his mike, sweating under the heat of the spotlight, squirming and looking at you with eyes that say, “Please, laugh. I beg of you—just titter, even!”? And then after what seems like years, you and your friends get up and give each other that wide-eyed stare and choke down your laughter until
WANDERLUST David Wain AMC River East
you’re safely in a booth at Applebee’s for half-off appetizers. Only then do you look at each other and go, “God! That was the worst.” If David Wain’s Wanderlust was a standup show, it’d be one of those—not so bad that you laugh through your cringing, but bad enough to make you regret the money you wasted for admission.
On paper, Wanderlust had all the pieces to be a relatively successful comedic whole—Wain’s 2008 hit Role Models, also starring Paul Rudd, was a crowd-pleaser and was considered a general box office success. Jennifer Aniston would appeal to a faction of viewers not swayed by the Apatow producer credit alone. Add a socially-relevant backdrop—recession— and a slew of highly-esteemed comedians, and you’ve got yourself something promising. In theory. Wanderlust operates on a straightforward, though overdone premise. George and Linda (Rudd, Aniston) are happily married and successful New Yorkers who’ve just bought a “micro-loft” in the West Village. Linda freelances, having most recently made a documentary about penguins with testicular cancer, while George is the business-y, suit-wearing type perpetually on the cusp of getting a bonus. All’s well for the couple, outside of being so busy that they literally fall asleep atop each other while trying to break in the new digs. But alas, tragedy strikes, and George’s office gets shut down by the Feds while HBO refuses to pick up Linda’s documentary on the basis of its criminally depressing subject matter (add more boobs and WANDERLUST continued on page 8
(L to R, foreground) Kerri Kenney-Silver, Paul Rudd, Jennifer Aniston, Justin Theroux, and Malin Akerman try hard to figure out what’s funny in Wanderlust, to no success. COURTESY OF UNIVERSAL STUDIOS
THE CHICAGO MAROON | ARTS | March 2, 2012
Style
Chicago Manual of
7
Fashion Week Roundup
by Jessen O’Brien by Anastasia Golovashkina
Designers, models, celebrities, journalists, photographers, and trendsetters have spent the better part of the past four weeks sprinting through a rapid succession of tents that showcase the latest fall and winter fashions. Distributed across an uneven span of two continents, four cities, and hundreds of designers, each week draws some 100,000 guests, with at least another 2,000 -3,000 taking care of lights, cameras, and actions that make this one of the most important events for the fashion industry each year. It’s the kind of thing that magician-turnedmodel Emma Watson might actually wish she’d had a time-turner for. Born from the complex socioeconomic tides of the WWII, the first-ever Fashion Week, then named Press Week, was held in New York as a way of distracting stateside consumers from the temporary inaccessibility of French fashions, which, in 1943, were considered the du jour Ă la mode. New York sought to showcase its own domestic designers, hoping that its takes on fashion would help fill the industry’s void of fresh French garments and techniques. To almost everyone’s surprise, “Fashion Weekâ€? became an instant, international success. In less than a decade, stateside styles had earned themselves a prominent place in the features of the world’s most popular fashion magazines. Much like the popularizing fashions of the United States, the concept of a weeklong fashion industry event soon spread as well. Though we’ve since witnessed the rise of a “Fashion Weekâ€? virtually everywhere, the so-called “Big Fourâ€? cities of fashion—New York, London, Milan, and Paris—host two major events per year. They showcase the Fall/Winter and Spring/Summer seasons
and are held in February and September of each year, respectively. We’re currently in the home stretch of Fall/Winter Fashion Week 2012; in September, we’ll already have moved on to the collections for Spring/Summer 2013. The hyper-advanced timeline of these shows allow fashion insiders and editors to begin preparing their celebrities, models, and editorials on a consistent schedule for season-appropriate publication. But the “premature� timelines also let mainstream fashion vendors (Forever 21, Zara, H&M, Urban Outfitters, and others) implement their low-cost interpretations of these looks. The likeness of Marc’s, Karl’s, and Diane’s looks are almost immediately transposed onto the mannequins of these stores’ next massmarketed collections. Almost every new, major fashion trend can trace its original conception to one of the “Big Four� fashion weeks. Take, for instance, New York City, home to the season’s first and only major stateside fashion week. Hosting the likes of Ralph Lauren, Calvin Klein, Diane von Furstenberg, Betsey Johnson, Anna Sui, Michael Kors, and the finalists of Project Runway, the event draws 3,500 journalists, showcases 2,500 distinct looks, and causes the on-site consumption of some 1,500 bottles of Imperial Vodka—and that’s still 3,500 fewer than the number of free OfficeMax notebooks designed and distributed for frantic front-row note-taking. Just as each designer developed a distinct reputation for a certain kind of structure or aesthetic, so too does each Fashion Week culminate in several shared trends and ideas. Chanel and Vuitton are established classics,
and many “classicâ€? brands—such as Ann Taylor and White House/Black Market—look to them for for that fiftieth tailored jacket, now nothing less than absolutely necessary. Likewise, sportswear brands like Lacoste and Ralph Lauren are predictably preppy; elements of their designs are also subtly adopted into the lookbooks of mainstream brands like Hollister and Abercrombie & Fitch. Elements of von Furstenburg, Jacobs, Rodarte, and ChloĂŠ find themselves in Zara, Forever 21, Topshop, and Urban Outfitters. So, what thematic elements can we expect to be purchase (or even see in stores) this upcoming autumn and winter season? • Darker, muted colors—especially deep pastels, though there does seem to be a dominance of grayer tones above the standard, basic black. • Neutral shades that mimic natural skin tones (like khaki, nude, or brown) paired with neon accents—a bright yellow collar, a lime shirt under a khaki cardigan, or hot pink socks underneath
light brown oxfords. • Loose silhouettes. • Minimal, simple, subtle accessories. These aren’t just vague vogues, either—the trends could have just as easily been oversize bags, metallics, or poodle skirts. Though concepts certainly do change, the ideas themselves constantly turn from a high-profile showcase to a high-profit stockroom. Of course, there are no hard-and-fast rules, and exceptions are to be expected. Muted colors? Not for Burberry Prorsum or Jeremy Scott. Loose silhouettes? Not for Emilio Pucci. Perhaps the most curious part of this entire process, is its effect on mainstream consumers. No one needs leggings, skinny jeans, cardigans, plaid shirts, ombre hair, glitter nail polish, combat boots, infinity scarves, or high-low skirts‌ but we buy them. Because they look good. Because they look different. But the most important reason? Because they’re there—because of Fashion Week. Imagine that: a trickle-down theory that actually works.
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THE
The University of Chicago Department of Music presents
GONDOLIERS
or The King of Barataria
by Gilbert & Sullivann
Hill Country Spring, David Forks
University Symphony Orchestra
Design and Intent... Saturday, March 3 8 PM Mandel Hall 1131 E. 57th Street
Barbara Schubert, Conductor Music of Beethoven, Walter Piston, Samuel Barber, and . Donations requested: $10 general /$5 students
music.uchicago.edu Persons with a disability who need assistance should call 773.702.8484.
March 9 & 10 at 8 PM March M h 11 at 2 PM Mandel Hall, 1131 E. 57th Street, Hyde Park performed by the Gilbert & Sullivan Opera Company and the University of Chicago Chamber Orchestra
TICKETS ON SALE Ticket Hotline: 773.702.9075 Hours: 12-4 PM, Monday-Friday In Person: 1010 E. 59th Street, Goodspeed Hall, 4th Floor
$5 Student | $20 General | $50 Patron
THE CHICAGO MAROON | ARTS | March 2, 2012
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Crude, obvious jokes from Apatow and company elicit more cringes than laughs WANDERLUST continued from page 6 and sex, advises the steely HBO exec). No longer able to afford a Manhattanite lifestyle, the couple hightails it to Georgia, where George has a job lined up with his domineering and insufferable brother. But car trouble on the way lands them at “Elysium Bed and Breakfast� instead, a free-loving rural commune staffed by the some of the hottest hippies you’ll ever meet. One thing leads to another, and George and Linda decide that perhaps free -range living is their best option, if only for a couple of weeks. The first problem with Wanderlust is that everything described above happens in about 20 minutes. The movie inexplicably operates at a breakneck pace, with George and Linda in their apartment and
out of it before anyone can utter the words “character development.� If Wain, who co-wrote the script, had been hastening to any particular conclusion, I might have understood the film’s briskness. But it goes nowhere,—and certainly not to any place you didn’t expect it to go from the trailers. The only time the movie slows down, is when it finds itself in the midst of a shamelessly unfunny joke; Wain’s style is all about prolonging the moment just a few beats past expectation. This might have worked if the featured jokes were actually funny. Instead, it’s just reel after endless reel of the usually charming Rudd beating the same dead horse. Or maybe, more accurately, clubbing the same dead baby seal. You might think the fact that the movie
revolves around a commune would open the door for Wain to explore, albeit comically, a few ethical issues here and there. Why exactly are these people living in a commune, after all? Surely it can’t be just be for the free love and the freer drugs. Well, apparently it is. That, or the optional clothing policy. As for character complexity, yeah, right. How can there be time for that, when there’s so much slow-motion bouncing old penis to be featured? A solid eighth of the film is Paul Rudd staring at himself in the mirror, mouthing variations of the phrase “suck my dick� in various accents. At one point, a woman goes into labor and delivers her own baby in the space of three minutes—all on a patio, without any water breakage. The crown jewel, however, is when the movie actually
recreates a classic YouTube video. Is this really what modern comedy has come to? In reality, it doesn’t matter so long as the right names are attached. In Wanderlust’s case, the names are as right as they can be for America’s tastes—Rudd, Apatow, and to a degree, Wain. People will insist on seeing Wanderlust and the hordes of other flicks churned out by this brosephy powerhouse, the crux of which is being a voice for the awkward, “average� men of America. Some of them will do it better than Wanderlust, others worse. But when the biggest hype surrounding a movie in its advanced release press junkets is whether or not its female lead will finally go topless, make sure you leave your standards at the theater door. To do otherwise would be the biggest laugh of the night.
BLACKSTONE MANAGEMENT BEAUTIFUL AND SPACIOUS APARTMENTS AT 54TH AND WOODLAWN * 2 BEDROOMS FROM $1,080 * 3 BEDROOMS FROM $1,680 * 4 BEDROOMS FROM $1,750 HEAT AND WATER INCLUDED PLEASE CALL ANNIE AT 773-667-1568 FOR MORE INFORMATION OR TO SCHEDULE A VISIT. Director David Wain on the set of Role Models. COURTESY OF UNIVERSAL STUDIOS
Lunch will be provided. Registration is required.
A. David Paltiel Professor at the Yale School of Medicine and Yale School of Management This program is free but registration is required by Monday, March 5. To register, please visit http://www.ssa.uchicago.edu for more details (search by the lecture title for the registration page). Please indicate if you would like to receive CECs by selecting the appropriate registration option. For information about SHINE please visit: http://ssascholars.uchicago.edu/shine For information about the Big Problems program, please visit: http://bigproblems.uchicago.edu Co-sponsors: STI/HIV Intervention Network (SHINE) of the School of Social Service Administration; the Big Problems program in the College; and the Darfur Action and Education Fund Persons with a disability who believe they may need assistance are requested to please call 773-702-1250 in advance.
p r o b l e m s
Wednesday, March 7, 2012 12:00 p.m. to 1:30 p.m. SSA, 969 E. 60th St., Room WIV
THE
b i g
Free Lecture: Economic Evaluation of Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis for HIV Infection
The University of Chicago Department of Music presents
GONDOLIERS
or The King of Barataria
by Gilbert & Sullivann
March 9 & 10 at 8 PM March M h 11 at 2 PM Mandel Hall, 1131 E. 57th Street, Hyde Park performed by the Gilbert & Sullivan Opera Company and the University of Chicago Chamber Orchestra
TICKETS ON SALE Ticket Hotline: 773.702.9075 Hours: 12-4 PM, Monday-Friday In Person: 1010 E. 59th Street, Goodspeed Hall, 4th Floor
$5 Student | $20 General | $50 Patron
THE CHICAGO MAROON | ADVERTISEMENT | March 2, 2012
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THE CHICAGO MAROON | SPORTS | March 2, 2012
UCVC fosters competition and camaraderie Jake Walerius Sports Staff Cycling has never really made it into the mainstream of American culture. Lance Armstrong captured the country’s imagination for a few years in the early 2000s, but as a whole, bikes have remained in the background. Cycling has always been more suited to subculture than pop culture and even if you don’t notice, it’s a sport with a huge following. It should be of no surprise, then, that the U of C has its own community of cyclists, too: the University of Chicago Velo Club (UCVC). The UCVC was founded in the early 1990s as a place for cyclists to come together, talk about cycling, give advice to new riders, and most importantly, ride their bikes. Club president Jesse Williams, a fifthyear biology graduate student, thinks that sense of community is part of what makes the club so important to its members. “The UCVC primarily provides a social community to connect people that love to ride and race bikes,� Williams said, “but it also is important in answering questions new people have about cycling. We promote a sport that isn’t popular in most areas of the U.S., but is something that can be enjoyed our entire lives.� Today, the UCVC has roughly 100 members including graduate students, undergrads, and alumni of the U of C. In addition to offering a community to cyclists in Hyde Park, the UCVC is a competitive organization and, for Williams, the club’s competitive history was a big attraction. The UCVC is a member of USA Cycling (USAC) and competes as a DII team in the Midwest Collegiate Cycling Conference (MWCCC). “I was a cyclist as an undergrad and looked up
the cycling club as soon as I was accepted into graduate school here in Chicago,� Williams said. “I was excited because they had a long history of success in the racing community and had five different DII national champions in the different cycling disciplines.� This year, the club has continued its tradition of success, winning the team track championship in the fall and the cyclo-cross championship this winter. The aspiration now is a MWCCC road racing title, but to do that, the team needs to expand, especially on the women’s side. “We are currently looking to increase the size of our women’s team,� Williams said. “We’ve had a lot of success with developing a strong women’s team, but there is a long way to go. As a whole, we are hoping to win the MWCCC Road DII team championship, but that will take both a strong men’s and women’s team.� In the meantime, the UCVC is looking forward to its annual Hyde Park road race, Monsters of the Midway (MoM), on May 12. This year will be the race’s 22nd installment and about 500 area cyclists are expected to compete. The race, which will take place on a 1.1-mile loop around the Midway Plaisance, is sanctioned by USAC and open to any cyclist with a USAC license. On top of organizing the event, the UCVC will also field a team in hopes of taking advantage of hosting the race. “It’s been a few years since we’ve won our own race,� Williams said, “but we’re hoping to do it again this year.� Until then, the UCVC will keep on riding. The club has four to six group rides per week ranging in distance from 20 to 120 miles. The MWCCC roadracing championship is up and running, and the UCVC is building a team to win it.
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One last chance: individual focus at Naperville meet
The men’s track team competes at the Margaret Bradley Invite last month at the Henry Crown Field House. DARREN LEOW | THE CHICAGO MAROON
Men’s Track & Field Matthew Schaefer Associate Sports Edito It’s almost done. Tonight in Naperville, IL, home of topranked North Central, the indoor season ends for almost the entire men’s team— and for everyone who’s competing. Chris Hall’s staff has decided to rest third-year Billy Whitmore, whose qualifying times have placed him, at this point, in a position to compete at Nationals. “It was a very difficult decision. In the end we decided, you know, right now, if the National meet were this weekend, he’d be in it,� Hall said. “There’s a chance he’ll get bumped out by sitting back and not competing, but in the end, the feeling was he had a better opportunity at the National meet if he’s out this weekend.� For the rest of the team, the Last Chance Meet is a chance to conclude indoors with
Roussell: “I think we’re going to be prepared for it� W. BASEKTBALL continued from back
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a strong performance. “It’s always nice to end the season on a high note,� first-year Renat Zalov said. “So I think if I do well, it’s just going to carry over to the outdoor season as well.� It’s also an opportunity for athletes to test out new events. “The last two weeks have been all about team goals. This is a little bit more about, ‘Hey, I’ve always wanted to try this event,’ or, ‘I want to try approaching it in a different way,’� Hall said. “It’s more for them.� As a result, during practice there has been a lot of focus on recovery, as well as the upcoming outdoor season. That, for the most part, has been the truth for runners not named Whitmore. “It’s been a really light week,� assistant head coach Laurie McElroy said. “It’s definitely a transition week for most of us.� Still, the spirit of competition is alive— different, perhaps tamed, but vibrant. “I’m still going to run the fastest time I can,� fourth-year Brian Schlick said.
Chicago will play Monmouth on Friday. The Fighting Scots have had a successful year, going 16–9 over the course of the regular season. Head coach Melissa Bittner was recently named 2011–12 Midwest Conference Coach of the Year. The Fighting Scots are an efficient shooting squad, posting a 45-percent mark from the field and 35 percent from beyond the arc. Their offense is led by fourth-year guard Haley Jones, fourth-year forward Marla Willard, and third-year forward Zipporah Williams, each of whom averages 11 or more points per game. According to Halfhill, the Maroons’ game plan isn’t about to change now that they’re entering postseason play. “We know that if we play hard...teams are going to have a tough time scoring,� Halfhill said. “We have the best defenders in the league, so teams have to worry about what they’re going to do differently on offense as opposed to what we’re going to do differently on defense.� Monmouth will have to find a way to match up with a much bigger Chicago squad, as the Fighting Scots don’t have a single six-footer on their roster. Chicago has two in its starting five.
“I think that’s something that’s been an advantage of ours all season long,� Roussell said. “ I feel like even against teams we don’t have a height advantage against, they have to defend our post players. I tell [them] all the time, ‘You’re not here because you’re big, you’re here because you’re athletic.’� If there’s a knock on this Chicago team, it’s that it’s been almost too good and has yet to experience a really close, back-andforth game. Aside from some early scares, Chicago has decimated almost every team it’s played so far this season and has won, on average, by almost 20 points per game. “It’s always an uncomfortable position to be behind, so hopefully we will not have to worry about such a situation,� Meghan Herrick said. “If we do get caught being down, our team digs deep and grinds it out.� “I feel like our kids have been really motivated,� Roussell said. “There’s just a focus that they get when they’re down and the game’s on the line. I think we’re going to be prepared for it.� The game tips off at 8 p.m. tonight at the Gerald Ratner Athletic Center. If the Maroons win, they’ll play the winner of Simpson vs. UW-Eau Claire on Saturday at 7 p.m.
THE CHICAGO MAROON | SPORTS | March 2, 2012
11 PHOTOS COURTESY OF BRIAN BOCK
INTRAMURAL CHAMPIONSHIPS Men’s Residence Hall Soccer Men’s Residence Hal l Basketball Coed Residence Hall Broomball Shayan Karbassi Sports Staff
Matthew Schaefer Associate Sports Editor
Jake Walerius Sports Staff
On Sunday, Woodward Big Wood defeated Rickert United to claim the intramural men’s indoor soccer championship. The match was a fiercely contested battle, but in the end Woodward came out on top with a resounding 4–0 victory. Both teams stormed through the playoffs to make it to the final round. However, from the very start of the season, Woodward was confident in its abilities. “We knew we had a strong team because we won men’s outdoor soccer in the spring and, despite losing three key players, we had a fresh crop of very talented first-years,” second-year Ameer Allaudeen said. After kickoff, Woodward grabbed an early lead and never let it slip. Even with a 2–0 lead, Woodward kept up the pace, putting pressure on the Rickert defense. When a Rickert United player got a red card late in the second half, Woodward took advantage, adding two more goals and sealing the championship. “I think the key to our success was that we all worked really well together and never lost track of the most important thing : having fun playing the beautiful game,” Allaudeen said. “[In the championship] and throughout the season, we had a great turnout from the players,” second-year Matt Luchins said. “While our opponents had no subs and sometimes even played the last 10 minutes down a man, we had several rotations and were able to wear them out. In addition, our MVP Jake Walerius had an outstanding game, scoring a few goals and constantly breaking up their attacks.” With another strong season under its belt, the Woodward team is now looking ahead to the spring IM soccer season.
It was the second straight year that the Alper men appeared in the finals of the men’s undergraduate residence hall championship. And as time expired, Tony Lian, second-year captain of the house’s “Red Army,” nailed a trey from the northeast side of the court. Add three points to the total and look at the score. Henderson: 36. Red Army: 34. For the fourth-ranked men of Alper House, time had already run out. “I was at the championship last year and we lost, and this was my redemption year, but I couldn’t get it done again,”Lian said. “Even though it went through, I knew it wasn’t going to be enough, even when I threw the ball up. It was still a bitter taste in my mouth.” The physical contest began with domination on the Henderson end, relying on the strong guard presence of first-year lefty Kevin Cuddy and the deft ball movement of fellow first-year Kevin Varn and second-year captain Ritodhi Chatterjee. “I felt like starting out, we just weren’t aggressive taking the ball to the basket,” Lian said. “We settled too much for jump shots.” At halftime, the Henderson men led by 11. But that didn’t last long. With four minutes left in the game, the score was tied, the lead vanished. “Basketball’s a game of runs, and I think each team had its runs,” Cuddy said. “It was close for a long time—we don’t want to underestimate our opponents—but I think we were confident we were going to be able to pull this out.” But following a series of baskets, including a three-point play by Chatterjee, the game was out of reach. A series of fouls followed, but to no avail. Despite the Red Army’s efforts, the men of Pierce prevailed. “I don’t think we played our best, but we played well enough to win,” Varn said, “so that’s all that really matters.”
Alper House’s Red Army was crowned IM coed broomball champion last Saturday after a 2–0 victory over the Estovers. Alper dominated possession from the start but, in a game of few chances, it seemed that wouldn’t be enough for the victory. The Red Army remained patient and got its reward early in the second half. Alper made the most of one of the game’s many goalmouth scrambles, taking a 1–0 lead. With the Estovers chasing a score, they left their defense exposed. It was a piece of individual magic that effectively ended the game. Second-year Alex Bennett intercepted the ball on Alper’s own half and ran nearly the length of the rink before slotting comfortably past the goalie to secure the win for his team. “It feels great,” Bennett said of the victory. “We had a disappointing loss last year to Surgical Precision, but we beat them this year in a shoot-out thriller and we got the win tonight. It’s a dream come true.” As for the Estovers—a team comprised of graduate students from the Law School and named after an obscure legal right to take timber from another’s estate—they were satisfied with their season as a whole, even if it was disappointing to lose in the final. “They were the better team,” Estovers’ Noah Yavitz said. “We’ve been scrappers all season, trying to put wins together how we can, but they outplayed us. At least we’ve spread knowledge of what Estovers are.”
Mahmoud Bahrani Senior Editor
Coed Residence Hall Soccer Lianne Rousseau Sports Staff As the intramural season comes to a close, the school finds itself at a place of reflection, taking the time to look back at the journey of the unsung heroes of the recreational sports world. And no team is as impressive as the Woodward Wolves, who took home first place in the coed soccer bracket this past Sunday. In a tournament full of upsets, the Wolves had to take down some stiff competition. They overthrew Jannotta/Fishbein, who held the second-place seed coming into the tournament in the Final Four. Then, in the championships, they had to get past Maclean (the fifth-place seed), the underdog who beat the Tufts House Ball Busters in the Final Four. Nevertheless, the Wolves asserted their dominance, wiping the floor with Maclean 6–3. The team hasn’t always enjoyed the sweet taste of success. “While we had only a few players during some of the preliminary games, by the time we got to the playoffs I was surprised by the amount of people that showed up to the games,” first-year Sam
Men’s Independent Basketball
Shapiro said, “not only as players but as spectators.” IM chair Ameer Allaudeen shared Shapiro’s initial reservations but thought the team had a fighting chance. “Going into the season, we knew we had a strong team because we won men’s outdoor soccer last spring, and even though we lost three key players from that team, we had a fresh crop of really good first-years come in.” Even though winning is a fantastic reward, both Shapiro and Allaudeen felt the house strove for something greater: fun. According to Allaudeen, Woodward “functioned really well as a cohesive unit,” which gave them an edge over the competition. “The best part of winning was rewarding all of the fans and supporters who came out to each game with a victory. It fostered a great deal of house unity and pride,” Shapiro elaborated. “I feel lucky to live in a house that has both an amazing soccer team and members who are willing to come out and support their housemates every weekend.” Now the unified housemates can celebrate, for they are the champions.
As far as rivalries go, it’s hard to find one more heated than the one between Psi Upsilon and Fiji. The two fraternities squared off Tuesday in a physical contest, pitting the finesse and shooting ability of “Psi Usual” against the strength and vitality of “The C-Men”. Fiji came out of the gates strong, dominating the first half defensively and holding Psi Usual to only eight points, a feat made even more impressive considering Psi Usual’s high-octane, perimeter-oriented offense. The C-Men went into the half leading 26–8, a seemingly insurmountable lead. After trading buckets for most of the second half, Psi Usual used some timely three-point shooting and a staunch defensive press to close the gap to just three points late in the second. Unfortunately for Psi Usual, the C-Men were able to figure out how to break the press and scored six quick points, ultimately winning 48–39. “I wasn’t worried. I knew we had it on lockdown,” said Fiji guard Alex Tucker, who sported a jersey emblazoned with the number 69 and his nickname, Dangle. “Fiji played a great game, and I give them kudos for that,” Psi Usual forward Yoni Einhorn said. “Next year we’ll bring the heat.”
SPORTS
IN QUOTES “I knew about Jeremy before you did, or everybody else did.” —President Barack Obama on Knicks point guard Jeremy Lin.
Great Scot! Maroons host Monmouth in first round of NCAAs rounds this weekend, its reward for going undefeated and being the top-ranked team in its quarter of the bracket. If Chicago wins both games this weekend, there is also a chance it could host next weekend’s games as well. “It’s really exciting to play in front of fans,” fourth-year guard Bryanne Halfhill said. “I’m so excited that we get to play at home and have the opportunity to play in front of our classmates and our friends.” Halfhill, along with five other Maroons, was awarded AllUAA honors this week. Fourthyear center Taylor Simpson was awarded All-UAA first team,
Fourth-year Meghan Herrick drives the ball against Macalester in Ratner Athletics Center. DARREN LEOW | THE CHICAGO MAROON
Women’s Basketball Mahmoud Bahrani Senior Editor March has finally swung around, and that can only mean one thing : The NCAA college basketball playoffs, also known as March Madness, are here. The
Maroons enter the playoffs as the favorite to win their half of the bracket, a stark contrast to a year ago when they were largely an unknown entity. “This year we have a target on our back,” fourth-year forward Meghan Herrick said. “We all want redemption for last [year’s loss to Wash U], so expectations
are high, but I believe we can reach such expectations.” Even a student body usually apathetic toward sports has gotten involved. At last weekend’s Wash U game, more than 1,500 fans showed up to watch Chicago play—a 25-percent increase from the same game last year. Chicago will host the first and second
Sluggers on display at Springfield opener Baseball
Chicago begins its 2012 season with a doubleheader against Robert MorrisSpringfield on Saturday, March 3 after six weeks of training. “We are looking forward to beginning our season,” said Brian Baldea, who is entering his 22nd season as the Maroons’ head coach. Robert Morris placed fourth at last year’s Small College World Series, a tournament hosted by the United States Collegiate Athletics Association (USCAA) for schools with between 500 and 2,500 students. Robert Morris features thirdbaseman Pete Dayton, who won last year’s Small College World Series home run derby. The Maroons finished last season with an 18–12–1 record, boasting the highest team batting average in the nation. “We expect to, again, produce at the plate and to score runs,” Baldea said. The Maroons expect to be led by their three returning All-UAA members: fourth-year catcher Stephen Williams, third-year left fielder Jack Cinoman, and third-year first baseman J.R. Lopez. Williams and Cinoman led the team in hitting last year, with averages of .402 and .425, respectively. Cinoman has paced the team in batting average for two consecutive seasons. Chicago will be without the consistent production of Nick Fazzari, who led DIII in on-base percentage (.581) last year as a fourth-year. “[Our] focus will be on stopping our opponents from having big innings,” Baldea said. After missing the playoffs last year, the Maroons decided to pursue a more ag-
Fri. 3/4, 4 p.m.
Chicago will have to contain the likes of Haley Jones, Zipporah Williams, and Marla Willard, the team’s top scorers—each of them average in the double digits—and rebounders.
UW-Eau Claire vs. Simpson Fri. 3/4, 6:30 p.m.
Chicago vs. Simpson Sat. 3/5, 6:00 p.m.
Center Stacey Shutjer leads the Storm into battle, boasting a 13.3 scoring average in addition to leading the team in rebounding (6.7 per game) and field goal percentage (.560)
gressive, ambitious schedule. They hope that the new schedule will strengthen their case for a postseason bid. “The schedule this year is extremely challenging,” Baldea said. “It will provide us the opportunity to show that we deserve consideration for postseason play.” Following their game against Robert Morris, the team has a two-week break before beginning the spring trip. This weekend’s contest should help prepare the team.
“It certainly would be beneficial to play prior to embarking on our ambitious 12-game spring trip to Florida,” Baldea said. Beyond last year’s regulars, Chicago’s lineup could include one of the 11 firstyears on the team’s 34-man roster. “[Our goal is to] bring good pitching and defense with us every day,” Baldea said. Their quest for postseason glory begins on Saturday at 1 p.m. in Springfield.
Next Weekend Sweet 16
Favored team in bold
In Greencastle, a quest to rule the court Sarah Miller Sports Staff
Dan McConologue pitches during a home game at Stagg Field last year. JAMIE MANLEY | THE CHICAGO MAROON
W.BASKETBALL continued on page 10
Chicago vs. Monmouth
Women’s Tennis
Derek Tsang Sports Staff
Meghan Herrick was awarded AllUAA second team, and fourthyears Joann Torres and Halfhill, as well as first-year Hannah Ballard, were given honorable mentions. Joining Simpson on the All-UAA first team was fourth-year forward Morgan Herrick, who in addition to being named to the first team was also recognized as the UAA player of the year. “I’m very, very happy for [Morgan],” head coach Aaron Roussell said. “She more than deserved it, after a lot of hard work and battling through injuries. It paid off and I’m glad to see that she’s been rewarded.”
Chicago (4–1) will be competing in the Indoor Tennis Association (ITA) Championships at DePauw in Greencastle, Indiana this weekend. The seven other schools competing are: Carnegie Mellon, Claremont-Mudd-Scripps, Denison, DePauw, Johns Hopkins, Washington and Lee, and Wash U. Last year, the Maroons finished second behind Emory. Since Emory is not competing this year, the Maroons are the top seed heading into the tournament. Williams and Amherst, the top-ranked and secondranked DIII teams, are also not competing. Fourth-year co-captain Jen Kung said that Chicago’s biggest opponents in the tournament are Washington and Lee, Carnegie Mellon, and Johns Hopkins. “All three teams did well in the fall and have added several talented freshmen to their lineups, so I think they’ll all be much better than they were last year,” Kung said. Teams are chosen to compete at the ITA Championships based on ITA na-
tional rankings from the previous season. NCAA DIII teams who wish to play in the tournament must bid for the spots, and the top eight teams within the criteria are chosen to play. An exception is made if the team hosting the event has a lower rank. Chicago’s first match will be against DePauw. Earlier this season, the Maroons beat DePauw 8–1. The Maroons are excited for the competition. “We’re going to get tested at Indoors, especially in the semis and finals, assuming we get that far, and if we want to finish as national champions this weekend, we’ll need to step up during those tough matches,” Kung said. A victory in the first match would lead to semifinals. A victory there would lead them to the finals. “We’ve been working hard at doubles all year, so that will be one of our strengths going into the tournament. We’re all also excellent singles players, so I expect us to do well in singles too. I guess one thing we want to keep improving is our ability to compete well even in high-pressure situations,” Kung said. Their first match of the tournament is Friday at 3:30 p.m.
CA LEN DA R Friday
3/02
- Track & Field @ North Central Last Chance 2 p.m. - Women’s Basketball NCAA Tournament 1st round vs. Monmouth 8 p.m.
- Women’s Tennis @ ITA Championships vs. DePauw 3:30 p.m.
Saturday
3/03
- Baseball @ RMC-Springfield 1 p.m. - Women’s Tennis @ ITA Championships
Sunday
3/04
- Women’s Tennis @ ITA Championships