Griffiti Magazine Issue 53

Issue 53

Inside Beer Pong Tournament Winners

How to beat the Christmas Blues

This year’s Christmas Apps and Tech reviewed

Issue 53 December 2012 Contributors Aaron Nam Aimee Doyle Aoife Drum-Towell Brian Keenan Daniel James Daniel Egan Dominika Grmanova Drew Peacock Grainne Kennedy James Dooely Jenny Murphy John Enright Josefina Maria Bentz Lance Kerrigan Mark Talbot Milda Endziulyte Oscar Finn Pamela O’Donnell Roz McMahon Stephen Donnery Sylwia Pytlarzl Theophane Dodeller

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Griffiti Magazine Griffith College Students’ Union South Circular Road Dublin 8 Email: su.president@gcd.ie Griffith Magazine is the Students’ Union Publication at Griffith College.It was established in 2004.

All contents copyright of Griffiti, reproduction of any part of the magazine without permission is prohibited.

The views expressed in Griffiti do not necessarily reflect that of the college or the SU

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A letter from the Editor

o way, we’re not half way there already? This year is going way to fast, after May I might have to go and get a real job! Oh, scary.

Anyway, I am proud to present to you our Christmas Issue of Griffiti.

Congratulations to Milda Endziulyte.

There was a photography competition this issue for the cover of the magazine and she submitted Frosty who we loved immediately because of his big (ahem) personality.

Also, in this issue, we acknowledge the fact that Christmas isn’t a great time for everyone and can be a difficult time of the year. If you find yourself having a hard time over the holidays check out page 18 where Educational Psychologist, Roz McMahon tells us a few ways to beat the blues over Christmas.

We have our usual reviews in Music and Movies and our Two Tech Pages feature all the festive apps and gadgets you’ve been wanting from Santa Clause.

I hope you all have a great time over the holidays and don’t get too worked up

Contents

about exams in January.

We will see you all again in 2013 and don’t forget, we have SHAG Week (Sexual Health, Awareness and Guidence) and RAG Week (Raise and Give) to look forward to next year so don’t get too bogged down by those studies, try to remember that, contrary to what every teacher and lecturer has told you right up until this point they are not actually the end of the world.

Merry Christmas, Ian Donegan, Editor

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State of the Union What have we been up to?

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SU News Next Discovery Trip and the like

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Sport Beer Pong Tournament

12 I Heart iPhone Technology Addiction 14 How democratic is Europe? Scottish Independence 16 Party People Can you see yourself?

20 Reviews Movies, Music and Christmas Tech 26 In Focus: Christmas Photography 28 Creative Writing When It’s Time 30 The Genuine Article So long and thanks for all the facts

In loving memory of Thomsas Heinrich

state of the union Claire Aston Entertainments Officer

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i All,

I hope the studying is going well for you all. It has been a long but enjoyable semester, and I hope that you have had as much fun as I have.

It’s hard to believe that it’s already over. Thanks a million to you all for making it such a great start to the year and making the events so good with your willingness to party hard.

The Christmas Ball was a huge success and safe to say you were all feeling very merry by the end of the night. Maybe not so much the next morning though.

The Ice-skating before the ball was just as much fun. I was slightly upset by everyones ability to ice-skate as I was sure we would get a laugh out of a few people putting on a show for us and falling over, maybe next year.

The fun doesn’t end there though, next semester we have just as much to come with S.H.A.G. Week (Sexual Health Awareness and Guidance), R.A.G. Week (Raise And

Give) both of which will have a week of events for you all to get involved in and many more nights out. Of course the second semester also means the second Discovery Trip, which will be taking place in Co. Clare with a trip to Bunratty Castle as well as the Cliffs of Moher.

It will be a busy semester and one you don’t want to miss out on.

Next year will also see the return of the infamous Griffith Ball, the biggest event of the year, which will be taking place on the 19th of April in the Burlington Hotel with an Oscars theme, a guaranteed night of fun with the chance to dress up. If you book tables of 10 before Christmas you will receive a free bottle of champagne on the night. Tickets are only €35 each before Christmas.

Hopefully a few of the erasmus students will be back for the ball and we won’t need to say goodbye to the new people that we have all got to know.

It was a really exciting semester and it will be a hard one to beat but I promise I will do my best to have as many parties as possible for you all. It will be part of my New Years resolution, as well as getting ready for this marathon in April.

Everyone have an amazing Christmas and New Years and I will see you all back in Griffith for the second half of the year.

To everyone who isn’t coming back for the second semester, it was great getting to know you all and I hope you will keep in touch and let us know how you are doing in the scary world outside of Griffith College!

See you all in 2013. xx

Sean Alari Clubs & Societies Officer

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i Everyone,

It’s finally Christmas time and I’m sure that you are all looking forward to a well-deserved break from your studies.

This semester has gone by so fast that it’s hard to believe it’s already over. I would like to thank you all, for participating in the Students’ Union activities that were organised this semester. Everybody had a blast and it was great to see such enthusiasm.

It’s been an excellent start to the year for sports. By the end of February we will have had 9 sports teams participating in intercollegiate competitions.

Our football team has had great success so far, qualifying for the quarterfinals of the plate cup and for the semifinals of the league; which will be played at the end of January 2013.

The Rugby season is not over yet and we’re sure that our boys will treasure the experience they’ve gained.

Our Basketball team is growing in confidence and will try and retain our precious place in Division 2.

The Cricket Indoor Intervarsities are just around the corner.

Hopefully the lads will be able to get into the latter stages of the competition as in previous years.

Badminton has given us great joy this semester by soundly beating NCI and narrowly missing victory against DCU. These were huge results, as we have not had a badminton team for some time.

Due to a few reasons the Volleyball season will kick off later than expected; however, we hope to have a competitive team for our first match. So far we are just happy to see the team grow in training, since it’s our first ever Volleyball team here at the College.

Finally, the Table Tennis team have put in a huge performance in UCD by coming in second in the first leg of the Division 1 League. Let’s hope we can build on this and close in on first place next semester.

If you do want to join our sports teams, you can choose between football, rugby, basketball, table tennis, fencing, badminton, volleyball, cricket or pool. We would love students to get more involved, so sign up at the Students’ Union next February!

Once you return to college for your second semester you will notice that we will have far more societies up and running compared to the first semester. These will include Drama, Creative Writing, Radio & Photography . We will also have more emphasis on Yoga and Dance, by meeting every second week. The Beer Pong and Poker will continue as per usual and will bring us plenty more drink and money.

So I hope that you all enjoy your holidays and look forward to seeing you all in the New Year.

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SU NEWS Discovery Trip 2013 ANNOUNCED!

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s always, another semester is going to mean another Discovery Trip. As many of you will undoubtedly remember the last trip took us to the rugged and beautiful mountains of Galway on our very first Adventure Discovery Trip which entailed students taking part in adventure sports such as hiking, kayaking, rock climbing, surfing and much more. The trip culminated in a great night out in Westport (Voted the best place to live in Ireland) With all the activities and the banter that went on the various bus journeys this trip was a complete success.

Naturally, the SU is excited, perhaps even more so about this trip which will take place in February from Friday 22nd to Sunday 24th.

We will be traveling to the even more rugged and even

more beautiful county of Clare in the west coast of Ireland (the far superior coast in this writer’s opinion).

We will be visiting Bunratty Castle and Folk Park. The Castle is the most complete and authentic medieval fortress in Ireland. Built in 1425, so if it was ever your hope to experience old Ireland then this trip is for you!

This is followed by a medieval banquet. It is as it sounds.

This is a dinner experience like no other. You will dine on the finest of olden style food.

You will even be treated to a goblet of mead on arrival.

You Harry Potter fans getting tingles yet?

During your medieval dinner you will enjoy the talents of the Bunratty Castle Medieval Performers playing music including harp and violin and ancient Irish dancing.

Also, on our journeys we will visit the vast Cliffs of Moher. A site so beautiful and awesome that it was recently

Bunratty Castle

considered to become the eight wonder of the world. You do not want to leave Ireland without first seeing this site of sites.

To round our trip off we will be enjoying a night out in the Town of Ennis in County Clare.

If you’re tired of hooking up with your classmates and other college goers then a change of

scene will do you good.

All the while we will be staying in a hotel in the region with breakfast included.

As ever, Discovery Trip tickets sell out fast so if you want to take part in one of the Student Union’s biggest events of the year you best get your tickets NOW!

KEEP UP TO DATE ON STUDENT UNION SPORTS, SOCIETIES, NEWS, EVENTS AND GRIFFITI MAGAZINE ONLINE ON OUR WEBSITE

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Discovery Trip Galway and Clare 2013 Visiting The cliffs of Moher on the west coast of Ireland Bunratty Castle and Folk Park Enjoying a Medieval Banquet and 15 Century music in the Castle Music in a Traditional Irish pub on Friday night Going out in Ennis on Saturday Breakfasy included

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Sign up in the SU

Sport Sports

Beer Pong Tournament

Beer Pong Tournament Champions: Victor Barazarte and Felix Kuhner AKA Team Kaos

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n immediate and on going success this year has been the introduction of Beer Bong as a Society.

It all started out as an event during Fresher’s Week earlier this year.

When the tournament went unabated for almost half of the day never once becoming boring or losing steam the SU thought it wouldn’t hurt to give it a go as a weekly society.

Convening downstairs in the SU every week were a healthy number of students playing the Ferris Bueller of sports.

Just a bit of fun you may think, a reason to get together and drink beer you may say. You would be wrong. Beer Pong is an international and respected sport.

And that is how it was treated by the students of Griffith College. With close competition between teams such as Team America, Goosebumps and Party Bitches no prisoners were ever taken at Beer Pong.

Then came the last week of the year where it would be possible to hold Beer Pong in the SU so they decided to make a knock-out tournament out of it rather than the point system that had been used up until this stage.

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Beer Pong Tournament Plate Champions: Lionel Ferbeo and Yan Koeniger AKA Monkey Tail

Twelve teams signed up. They were Team Kaos, Drunk Tones, The Avengers, Not Yet, Monkey Tail, Party Bitches, Bono, The Tooth Picks, Team Actimel, 2 Guys 10 Cups, Tommy & Max and Triple G. We proceeded with a knock-out format with the losers of their first matches being entered into a plate cup.

In the end, it was Monkey Tail vs 2 Guys 10 Cups in the Final of the Plate Cup. Monkey Tail were the victors making Lionel Ferbeo and Yan Koenige the Plate Champions.

Meanwhile, on the other table the Final of the Beer Pong Tournament was taking place. Team Kaos vs The Tooth Picks.

It came down to one cup on each side and it was Team Kaos who made the final shot first making them the undisputed Griffith College Beer Pong Tournament Champions.

Beer Pong will, of course, resume next semester and there will be the odd Tournamnet as well. The SU urges anyone who would like to take place in the Beer Pong meetings to sign up in the Students Union building and if you would like to take part in one of the tournaments sign up as soon as possible as it does fill up fast!

Below: Fresher’s Week Beer Pong Tournament winners Sean Flatley and Chris Johnson aka Team America

Tallaght Table Tennis

Left to right Aaron Nam, Marcus Hughes, Eric Choong, Darren Hui, Albert Chan and Roman Schoeneck

5-4 win for Griffith Soccer A Team against Galway ti

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riffith College progressed to the Quarter-Finals of the Umbro Plate in spectacular style. 3 goals in 15 minutes saw GCD force extra-time in which they went on to beat Galway Technology Institute 5-4 in a game that had everything a spectator could wish for.

Halfway through and G.T.I could have been ahead but for the fingertips of the GCD’s number one, Gary Patterson who got in behind the defence where he found himself one on one with the keeper who read the winger’s mind and managed to grab the ball from his feet.

The away side were starting to boss matters and on the 30 minute Mark Evan Browne was unlucky not to get his name on the score sheet. After some good passing play he drove a cracking strike that just went over the bar.

The teams went level at half time after a half which saw both sides playing some good football; however they both were lacking the killer ball in the final third.

In an extremely eventful second half it was G.T.I who had the better start. Seven minutes in and it was GCD that nearly notched the first of the day; Luke Hogan

By Brian Keenan and Stephen Donnery

found the ball at his feet, his shot however was denied by the feet of Gleeson. Minutes later and the game finally had its first goal.

Lawless made a good interception that tore through the defence and blasted the ball into the top corner. It only took a couple of minutes for the games second goal to arrive and it came in great style.

Patterson gave a perfectly weighted pass to Evan Browne who in turn rifled a low shot into the corner of the net.

In the 63rd minute it seemed like G.T.I had taken the game out of the reach of the hosts. After some good work down the wing Lawless crossed and the ball fell to Colin Brady; his sweet strike found its way to the top corner to make it 3-0. G.T.I was starting to get on top and had a variety of chances to finish the game as a contest, chances that they would be left to rue.

With just 15 minutes to go, the Dublin side could have just given up but to their credit they kept battling and were rewarded after Luke Hogan finally got the better of Gleeson. He found himself with just the keeper to beat and he was up to the task on this occasion. It was game on again and GCD were starting to believe they could perhaps get something out of the game and

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riffith College Dublin played a friendly table tennis match against IT Tallaght on the 21/11/2012. The teams were split into four divisions with members of our group being paired up against members from IT Tallaght. Griffith College Dublin was represented by Darren Hui, Albert Chan, Marcus Hughes, Eric Choong, Roman Schoeneck and Aaron Nam. The Groups were as follows: Roman and Marcus, Eric, Albert and Darren, Aaron.

There were two very intense games between Marcus and one of the players from the other team and another game between Roman and another member from the opposition. Marcus and Roman both won against their opposing players, Eric won against their opposition, Albert and Darren beat the two members of IT Tallaght and Aaron also won against his opposition. The day ended with Griffith College Dublin winning against IT Tallaght in all matches.

only for an Evan Browne interception it would have been two goals in two minutes for the home side.

The away sides defence was starting to look shaky and with five minutes to go it was Hogan again who took full advantage.

The ball was knocked into his path and the striker applied a decent finish to complete his brace. With just minutes to go Bryan Porcello headed in from a corner to complete an incredible 15 minutes which saw yet another three goals.

GCD showed great fight, spirit and determination to force the game to extra time but G.T.I will know themselves that the situation could have been avoided. The momentum was now with the home side and five minutes into the first half Hogan completed his hat-trick.

He made a bursting run through the defence to finish past the helpless Gleeson.

And just when you thought things couldn’t possibly get worse, Evan Browne was shown a second yellow card for dissent.

Not long after, Gleeson pulled off a decent save from a corner only for Nigel Kennedy to pounce on the rebound and make it 5-3. The remainder of the half saw a few half chances but nothing substantial, until Carberry curled a beautiful free kick into the top corner only for Osi to pull off one of the saves of the game to deny Carberry.

In the second period G.T.I kept battling and was awarded a penalty after Luke Lawless was brought down in the box. Fallon scored his second of the day to leave the chance of a penalty shoot out a possibility.

That chance seemed to disappear after Carberry received a straight red card for what the referee described as foul language.

With GCD now having the numerical advantage they saw out the game with some ease and their goal was rarely threatened. It was a thriller for the neutrals and a fantastic result for the home side.

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Features

I Heart iphone

By Josefina Maria Bentz

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ometimes you feel like the only way of having a chat with the people sitting next to you at lunch break would be to actually take out your phone and actually chat, ”Could you please pass me the salt?”

Send. ”Yeah sure, here you are!”

Send. “Thanks a million. Btw did you hear about Tom and Mary?

WTF?!” Send.

One cannot even have a dinner conversation at home without being disturbed

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by an iPhone screaming for attention at the end of the table. What is going on?

Humans have over millenniums developed highly functional languages through speech and gestures and here we are now, in the 21st century, neglecting years and years of social evolution just to interact online - to live and breathe in the digital world of ‘post’, ‘like’, ‘tweet’ and ‘send’. It is in the

essence of our nature that we humans are social animals, but are we slowly changing our social path? Are we a part of an evolution or a devolution?

Smart-phones are always by their side, and we never let them down (unless the WiFi’s poor). With these devices people have the possibility to make phone calls, listen to music, play games the list of applications is endless. It is incredible how handy these phones can be, but they are almost too handy. Could they be too good to be true? Are they so good that we are becoming dependant on them?

I was at a concert at the O2 arena.

While waiting on the band to come out, I could not help but notice all the lights in the arena. They were all coming from phones. People using their smartphones, updating their Facebook and Twitter. But wait, what about the people next to them, the ones just looking out in space waiting for their friend or partner to get off their phone? A thought struck me like lightning – We are so busy updating our lives online, showing people we barely see in real life what a great time we are having, without just taking the time to talk to the person sitting next to us. That does not seem very social, or is it social just on another strange level?

So, what consequences could come from this smart-phone dependency? Well first of all, with the iPhone musketeer by your side, it is very easy to neglect your everyday ‘real life’ relationships. For example, when you are checking your twitter when you are meeting up with friends or answering your phone when having a family dinner. You cannot help it; you just need to see who is trying to contact you.

Small facts, currently there are around a billion Facebook users. 500 million of these

Studies have shown that women are more likely than men to become addicts of things with a social character

users check their account everyday, whereas 28 per cent of the 500 million check it on their phones even before they have gotten out of bed. These statistics say quite a lot about where we are heading as a society. We seem to be adjusting our list of priorities.

Rather than food, information is now the primary thing on our agenda when we wake up.

In 1995, 2-3 per cent of all internet users were stated to be internet addicts.

Naturally in our society today, more internet users equals more internet addicts. We can easily get tonnes of information from all around the world thanks to the internet. And with the iPhone by our side this information is available at all times.

In this information greedy society, for better and for worse, some fall into the trap of becoming dependent on, for example, social networks.

Recent studies has shown that women are more likely than men to become addicts of things with a social character, such as text messaging, phone addiction and social

network addicts. It has also shown that people, who use social networks a lot, in general believe that their online friends are living happier lives than themselves. It is not a big surprise, as it is rarely that people show their nasty or grumpy side online and prefer to show off the “bright side” of their lives instead. This in combination with an addictive person obsessive need of information can

moment. An example of FOMO phobia is when the phone is ringing and you feel that you have to take the phone call, because it might be something important. If you are not able to find your phone you get stressed because you maybe missing out on something. That is your FOMO moment right there. FOMO can also leave you anxious and stressed for taking on too many things, trying to be everywhere at once and never saying no. All in all, people are worrying so much about what they cannot miss out on, that they actually miss out on the life passing in front of their eyes.

Don’t get me wrong. I have an iPhone and I think it’s brilliant. All technological devices are here to help us, not to rule our lives. I believe we need to re-prioritise our lives.

I mean having a coffee with a good friend without having an iPhone on the table glaring at you. The world has got so much more to offer and it is a shame for us to focus on a tiny screen 24/7. A screen can’t give you a hug when you are sad, but a friend can.

In 1995, 2-3 per cent of all internet users were stated to be internet addicts lead to an unhealthy distorted view of reality.

There is even a new phobia related to the technology-trend, which was discovered not so long ago. It is the FOMO phobia – the Fear Of Missing Out. The fear of missing out on something which could be more important than what you are actually doing at the

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e cannot pick up a paper, watch the news or listen to the radio without being bombarded by constant reminders that we, along with the rest of the Europe and the Euro zone, are in a very precarious economic situation.

The reports focus on the Euro, national banks, mortgages, debt, promissory notes, bond holders, the European Central Bank and troika to name a few.

However, these popular media buzzwords may be depriving column inches in the media from other threats to European stability.

An emerging trend towards fragmentation of European member states has been a further source of worry for many officials in Brussels and across the world. Several prosperous regions within Europe with distinctive ethnic, historic or linguistic identities have been examining the possibility of independence. These include Catalonia in Spain, Flanders in Belgium, Venice in Italy and our neighbor, Scotland. It is the E.U. itself that makes such ideas all the more possible. It offers these potential sovereign nations the opportunity to remain part of a large common market while keeping control of their wealth for their own regions.

However, as Scotland is finding out, such ideas may be harder to realize than they

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How democratic is Europe? seem. Recent media reports have indicated that not all European officials are keen on making independence attractive to these nations. Recent statements from European officials and the involvement of the European commission, two years before the proposed referendum, is an indication that Europe is taking possible fragmentization as a serious issue. There is currently no method of dealing with these situations regarding members of the European Union.

The European Commission’s

to the House of Lords, Barroso has forcefully asserted that “the separation of one part of a member state or the creation of a new state would not be neutral as regards the EU treaties ... the EU is founded on the treaties which apply only to the member states who have agreed and ratified them.”

The Scottish National Party had assumed that membership would be automatic, or a box ticking exercise at most. As a result the recent statements from EU officials have caused them to worry. Herman Van

The more fragmented Europe becomes, the less it will be able to use its combined military and diplomatic strength to the benefit of its citizens head, José Manuel Barroso, has been quoted as saying Scotland “has to apply…like any other state” for entry into the European Union and Spain’s foreign minister has stated the country would have to “join the queue” and be subject to the screening process and consensus vote by existing members. In a letter

Rompuy, the president of the European Council has given his personal opinion on the issue in a recent interview, “Nobody has anything to gain from separatism in the world of today which, whether one likes it or not, is globalised,” he said. “We have so many important challenges to take and we will only

succeed if we can pool forces, join action, take common directions. The global financial crisis is hitting us hard.

Climate change is threatening the planet. How can separatism help? The word of the future is union.”

In response the Deputy First Minister Ms Sturgeon, who is heading up the Scottish Government’s independence campaign, has claimed it is “overwhelmingly” in the EU’s interests for Scotland to join.

The SNP have stated that Scotland will remain part of the European Union. Ms Sturgeon has said “Scotland’s vast assets – fishing, oil and gas, renewables; our value as an export market to other member states; our educational system enjoyed by thousands of EU students every year; and our status as home to tens of thousands of EU citizens, mean that the economic, social and political interests of the EU would be best served by Scotland remaining in continuous membership,”.

The prospect of Scottish independence is more complicated for them than it was for Ireland prior to the creation of the EU. It raises several questions both for the E.U. and others internationally. The union will be worried over ‘independence contagion’ and will want to stop any movement towards a ‘Balkanised’ EU. A discussion paper published in October, ‘Accommodating an Independent Scotland: How a British-style Constitution for the EU Could Secure Scotland’s Future’ cites a worry that Scotland will demand further optouts and exceptional positions and that this will only intensify the situation whereby the EU is moving into a two-tiered membership. Arno Engel and Roderick Parkes, authors of the paper, believe that the European commission is hardening its position because the financial crisis is “reinforcing trends towards political separatism across the EU”.

They believe there is a worry that such political movements would result in the loss of a powerful and cohesive member state like the UK. The question facing the EU is can it offer Scotland a “seamless transition to independence” while rejecting the

same for other regions with similar ambitions? How does the European Union balance the interest of Democracy within its borders with a stable cohesive EU? If it is possible to offer Scotland such a transition it may not give them the membership they expect. They will most likely be forced to drop the opt-outs that the UK have.

After all the UK got these optouts on the basis that the EU is not the same union which it signed up to in the 1970s.

Engel and Parkes claim that ‘the need to punish what would in truth be a legitimate, even normal, political development, points to a deeper weakness in the EU’s set-up: its inability to deal with variety within its membership. Truth be told, it is not the threat of ‘independence contagion’ that primarily motivates the majority of governments. It is the prospect of having another troublesome member which does not engage properly with European integration.’

This is a view shared by other commentators. Dr Daniel Furby of Business for New Europe said Scotland’s membership will “come down to politics” due to the aforementioned independence movements in other EU countries.

He said “The incentive for countries like Spain, possibly even Italy and possibly Poland is to make the process quite rigorous, quite formal and to take a period of time… so Scotland, they would like to see, have to jump through a certain number of hoops in which to define its future relationship with the European Union. What they don’t want there to be is for a precedent for an easy ride, a fast-track for secessionist movements within existing member states.” This would act as a “dis-incentive” for separatist movements in their own countries he claimed.

Internationally there are also worries. The United States will be worried about the effects this will have on their strongest ally, the UK. The Washington Post has described the Scottish movement as ‘creating another European mini-state unable to contribute meaningfully to global security’ and Phillip Hammond, the UK defence secretary, described the defense plans of the Scottish National

Party as “laughable” in a BBC Radio 4 interview. He said “The UK armed forces are a highly integrated and very sophisticated fighting force. The idea that you can sort of break off a little bit, like a square on a chocolate bar and that would be the bit that went north of the Border, is frankly laughable.” Scottish Secretary Michael Moore, on a recent three-day trade mission in the US and Canada claimed an independent Scotland would have “reduced clout” and “diluted influence” on the world stage. “Based on legal and academic opinion, the most likely outcome in the event of Scotland leaving the UK is that the remaining UK would continue as an EU member state,” Mr. Moore said. “By definition, the remaining UK would be a smaller entity, shedding influence, but it would remain a comparatively large, wealthy and powerful player.

It’s a hot topic of debate in Scotland at the moment and will continue to be until the referendum in 2014. There is a worry that as a new member state in the EU, Scotland would be forced to join the euro at a time when it is facing the most serious crisis in its history as we are all too aware of here in this country. It may not be possible for Scotland to gain fiscal independence and at the same time retain the sterling currency. Such a situation could expose the rest of the UK to a kind of Euro style crisis if Scotland were to develop fiscal problems similar to those in Greece, Portugal, Spain, Italy and here in Ireland.

Scotland’s viability would depend largely on revenues from Britain’s North Sea oil fields which Scotland believes they have a majority claim on over the UK. This however will most likely be contested by

He also claimed that Scotland would not have a prominent seat in the influential G7 and G20 group of nations. “A Scotland that downsizes its influence on the European platform also downsizes its influence on the world stage. As of now, the United Kingdom sits at the top tables of the EU, the G20, the G7, where the big economic decisions are taken.”

However, the SNP do not agree with such assertions.

They have said “The fact is that, with the degree of independence we already have in the Scottish Parliament, we have more successful inward investment, small business support and exports promotion policy than Westminster operates – as well as in health, police numbers and student support…

We can have equally successful policies with the full powers of an independent Scotland in the areas currently reserved to Westminster.”

Regardless of the European Union’s position, does it make sense for Scotland to become an independent nation?

the British Government. Some analysts believe the UK could retain up to a third of the fields.

Regardless, these revenue sources are finite.

The Institute for Fiscal Studies has said in the short term the picture would be similar to the UK. However in the longer term, Scotland would have a larger fiscal adjustment should the North Sea oil and gas revenues reduce as predicted. The IFS said: “If you add in a geographic share of oil and gas revenues, then Scottish tax revenues would in recent years have been high enough to slightly more than offset the higher levels of public spending… But over the longer run if, as seems likely, North Sea oil and gas revenues fall, an independent Scotland would face a bigger fiscal adjustment than the rest of the UK.” However Finance Secretary John Swinney claimed “The IFS report confirms that Scotland is more than able to pay our way with public spending offset by revenues raised in Scotland and that with the appropriate

A weaker Europe undoubtedly means a less stable world

share of North Sea revenues Scotland’s public finances have been stronger than the UK’s in every year from 2006-07 to 2010-11 with an average fiscal deficit lower than the UK’s since 2000… with independence Scotland will be able to face the difficult financial choices ahead from a stronger position than in the UK and use the full range of economic levers to support growth, boost revenues and deliver public services.”

Looking from the Irish perspective, sovereignty, at least in a financial sense, is hard won and easily lost. Is the prospect of harsh fiscal adjustment a price worth paying for independence in a country that already has a strong national identity? Most Scottish people consider themselves Scottish already regardless of their country’s administrative standing. Given the practical realities of world economics and policies, throwing away 300 years of solid stable economic union may be a folly pursued by a naïve populist government to the benefit of Ministers gathering votes for the next election, but to the detriment of the people’s standard of living in the long run. What they will gain in independence from the UK, they will undoubtedly lose on re-entry into the European Union. Perhaps it’s the current financial situation in this country and the pandering we now have to do to the troika and other institutions that has left this writer with an overt amount of cynicism. What it boils down to for Scotland may well merely be a case of cutting out the middle man in London and dealing straight with their bosses in Europe. Either way, we will have to wait till 2014 to see how the situation, both domestically for Scotland, and on a European Union level for the rest of us, is resolved. The outcome will no doubt have a profound effect on the EU and could see a shift in the number of member states and the shape of some long established European borders. The more fragmented Europe becomes, the less it will be able to use its combined military and diplomatic strength to the benefit of its citizens and internationally.

A weaker Europe undoubtedly means a less stable world.

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Features

christmas time blues

by Roz McMahon, Educational Psychologist

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hristmas can be a difficult time of year for many. The pressures of dealing with family, managing money and studying for exams occur amid expectations of celebration and happiness. The following are a few suggestions for surviving some of the challenges that come with Christmas.

Know yourself This may seem obvious but when it comes to stress each person has their own unique experiences. In order to manage stress it is vital to think about your own i)triggers ii) automatic stress responses and iii) coping mechanisms and whether these coping mechanisms

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are effective or need replacing . At a given time the sources of stress could be exams, family, money worries, relationships etc.

Spend time reflecting on the triggers of stress and anxiety for you and identify the stressors that will most likely come up for you at Christmas time. When it comes to managing stress it is good to come prepared.

Our most common stress reactions are bodily responses such as increased heart rate and shallow breathing, mental and

emotional responses such as thoughts of powerlessness and anxiety and behavioural responses such as disturbances to our sleep and eating patterns. Consider your own stress reactions as these vary in type and intensity for each person. Get into the habit of treating these stress responses as cues to put your problem-solving and coping strategies into action. Taking some form of positive action is better than dwelling on the source of stress and aspects of it that you can’t change.

Taking some form of positive action is better than dwelling on the source of stress

Focus on effective and healthy strategies Physical coping strategies to deal with increased heart rate and breathlessness include relaxation exercises e.g. breathing exercises such as those commonly taught in yoga and visualisation tech-

niques such as imaging yourself in a calm and tranquil setting. It is important to find relaxation techniques that are a good fit, therefore, try different ones until you find techniques that work for you. Thoughts of powerlessness and feelings of anxiety and depression can be replaced with positive self-talk, this self-talk should be reflective of you and the language you typically use. Behavioural strategies can involve a problem-solving approach that tackles the source of stress e.g. money management for financial difficulties or study and organisational skills for academic worries.

It is also vital to have someone to talk to who will listen to your concerns and worries. Once you find yourself feeling stressed you can therefore put your coping strategies into action and be confident that you will be able to manage it.

Alcohol It can be very difficult to avoid alcohol at this time of year. If Christmas is a difficult time for you remember that alcohol is a depressant and monitor and if necessary moderate your intake. Avoid situations where drinking is the main activity or if that is not possible reduce the amount of time you would normally spend at these events. Find an ally, someone who will support your choices and who will help you stand up to peer-pressure.

not simply rewrite the lecture but use techniques that will make the information meaningful for you. Most of us (60%) are visual learners therefore techniques such as MindMaps may be helpful as well as other tricks such as mnemonics, i.e. tricks for remembering many elements of a topic e.g.

SWOT = Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities and Threats.

Set yourself SMART goals for each session, i.e. goals that are Specific Measurable Achievable Realistic and Time limited. Rather than focusing on a subject for the day identify a specific topic for each session and a means of measuring your progress at the end of the session e.g. answering an exam question. If you have difficulty getting started make a list of short enjoyable activities or small treats which you can reward yourself with after successful study sessions, be it an enjoyable snack/meal, meeting up with a friend for coffee etc. Be sure to incorporate some form of exercise into your daily study routine also.

at www.mabs.ie and they also operate a helpline which is open Monday-Friday from 9am-8pm – call MABS on 0761072000.

Loneliness As Christmas is typically promoted as an opportunity for socialising and getting together with family it can be a reminder for some people of the lack of social support in their life, the fact that they are away from family and friends or of the difficulty of the interpersonal relationships that they do have. As a result it can be difficult to avoid negative self-talk at this time. It is important to have a few strategies to cope with this.

If geographical distance is the main source of loneliness exploit communication technology in order to stay connected e.g. Skype, What’s App, Facebook etc. Be proactive in contacting people or arranging times for regular Skype chat over the holidays.

If you have a small social network but would like to expand it identify potential sources of doing this, such as joining clubs and societies. Whilst this can be a nerve racking prospect don’t let anxiety stand in your way. Be brave and give it a chance as you never know the friendship opportunities it might bring.

Get a good night’s sleep before each exam. The brain keeps working when you’re asleep, committing information to your mind

Exercise Apart from the physical health benefits exercise can also improve your mood and relieve stress, anxiety and depression (Psychological Society of Ireland, 2010).

Each person will have their own way of getting exercise, if you’ve yet to find yours experiment with different activities until you find one that suits you and incorporate it into your daily routine. If you don’t exercise at all start small such as taking stairs instead of the lift or getting out at a train or bus stop one stop earlier. This can help you to start building up a regular exercise routine.

Exam time Continue to pay attention to your diet and exercise during exam time. Many students do “all-nighters” in the run up to exams however this can lead to impaired performance on exam day as well as resulting in exam day disasters such as falling asleep and missing the exam. Get a good night’s sleep before each exam as the brain continues working even when your asleep, committing the information to your memory.

Study skills and exams With exam time coming up get organised. If your notes are not in order spend time doing this but don’t let it become the main focus of your day! Set yourself a short amount of time to get organised and then have clear goals for each study session. With regards to study notes do

Financial If money is a source of stress for you the Money Advice and Budgeting Service(MABS) is a free and excellent resource for people who want advice with regards to managing their budget. They have produced a special leaflet for Christmas which is available from their website

Volunteering This can be an excellent source of new contacts whilst also having a positive impact on how you feel about yourself.

Explore volunteering opportunities in your college and local area, especially as volunteers are often needed and greatly appreciated at Christmas. See also www. volunteer.ie for more info, there are a number of volunteering categories based on specific skills and interests including one especially for the Christmas period.

For some people Christmas means surviving difficult family interactions.

Have coping strategies to hand such as those described above to help you manage difficult moments. Always have someone you can talk to be it a personal contact such as a friend or family member or a professional such as the student counsellor or another counselling service.

See pleastalk.ie/gcd for services available in GCD, www.spunout.ie for more information on managing your mental health and www.yourmentalhealth.ie for a list of general and specific support services.

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y t r a P e l p o e P

Reviews

Two Tech pages

This month in Two Tech Pages, it’s Jingle all the way with some new music players, checking it twice, It’s ‘a whole new world’ with Netflix and Disney, and celebrating a very special 20th Birthday but first it’s our Christmas list for the must have Christmas apps for iOS and Android.

by Lance Kerrigan

Top 5 Festive Apps - iOS Santa GPS

Santa has installed a GPS tracker on his slay this year, allowing all the boys and girls to track his journey on Christmas Eve. For Just €1.79 the app delivers real time information on Santa’s location across the world. Features include Departing location, Destination, latitude and longitude and a detailed map.

Appygraph

The thing about Christmas cards is they are generic and become out-dated, not to mention that we are staying in contact more using online medias, perhaps not even knowing our friends physical addresses anymore. Its no surprise that Ecards are becoming increasingly popular. With Appygraph, you can send something personalised. This may not replace physical cards entirely, but it means that you can spread your festive message to a wider group of people who you care about, without breaking the bank. Appygraph is free to download and you have a beautiful collection of Christmas templates to add a personal touch as well, but a €1.79 upgrade unlocks a wider variety of templates.

Coca Cola’s Santa’s Helper

Coca Cola have always made a big impact on Christmas. This year, they bring us a free game app called Santa’s Helper. The Game involves Santa flying on his slay above the rooftops delivering presents. It’s your job

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to steer his slay to collect the floating presents and to drop them successfully into the Chimneys below. But beware; missing three Chimneys and Christmas is cancelled. Like many of those simplistic games, they can become addictive and with its Price tag of ‘Free’ its certainly one to get you into the festive mood.

Holiday Video cards

by Vlix Holiday Video cards takes Ecards to a whole new level.

Instead of using a photo with some text as an Ecard, this app allows you to capture your personal message in a 60 second movie clip card. Sending personalised video messages to friends or loved ones has never been simpler and more professional. Capture your video, add a backing Christmas track, gloss your video with a dynamic template and your ready to send it to that special someone. Sharing is easy with multiple ways to spread your greetings by Email, or post to Facebook, Twitter or even upload to YouTube, right from the app. Why only send a photo when you can send a video Ecard giving a much deeper personal message. But this app does so much more. Best part is that this app is free.

iTunes 12 days of Christmas

This is the number one app to download this holiday season for iOS. iTunes has a little gift for all its users. For 12 days this app delivers a gift via a notification for a free download. This can be a song, app or an ebook. The app is available for free to download any time, while the gifts are delivered from Dec 26th. Last year’s gifts included Music from artists like Lady Gaga and Cold play, as well as some exciting games and ebooks. This is Apples way of saying thanks this holiday season.

Top 5 Festive Apps - Android Talking Santa

Talking Santa is a fun and hilarious app where you can knock hours of comedy merely by talking to your device. Say something and the app will repeat it in a humours tone.

Christmas Gift List Planner

Have a big Christmas shopping list. Finding it hard to keep track. With this app, you can keep note of who to buy for and what to buy for them.

Count down to Christmas

Concerned over how many shopping days left. There is an app for that. With this app you can count down the number of shopping days before Christmas and thus the number of days to Christmas. Don’t get caught on that last minute rush.

Ecards – Christmas Ecards

Send beautiful e-cards to your friends and family right from your smartphone, choose from a range of animated templates and personalise them with a message, then share them over Facebook, Twitter or Email.

Santa’s Helper – Coca cola

The same App by Coca Cola found on iOS, designed perfectly for Android.

Top Tech Gift List Stuck for some ideas for Gifts? Here are some exciting and novel alternatives to the main stream gadgets and gizmos for loved ones this Christmas:

format for later. The pen also records audio as you speak with the touch of a button, so while you sketch a design, you can also create audio notes that can play back in sync with the text or sketch as you wrote it. This is the perfect gift for College students for jotting down notes at lectures or designing for a major project.

Available online at: Amazon Cost: Around £159.99

iTunes Gift Cards

Bring note taking to the 21st century, this smart pen records the text or sketch’s you create on paper and creates a digital

Gift cards are always a convenient present to give someone, and if you know someone who has an iPod or other i device, then perhaps an iTunes gift card is just perfect. This gift card credits the iTunes account for the redeemer giving them credit

Happy 20th Birthday SMS

forward therefore Newscorp will discontinue production from December 15th.

The Sky Wi-Fi Smart Pen:

This month Marks the 20th anniversary of the first ever SMS Text message sent. On December 3rd 1992, 22-year-old engineer Neil Papworth sent a text message from his computer in London to Richard Jarvis’s mobile saying ‘Merry Christmas’.

Sinse then Short Messaging Service (SMS) has become such a phenomenal success reaching 7.4 trillion text messages sent world wide in 2011 alone. Ireland is one of the biggest ‘texters’ with an average of over a billon text messages send every month in the first half of 2012.

NewsCorp drops The Daily

One major blow to the E-magazine industry, with NewsCorp announcing it will drop production of The Daily; The Daily was set to be a flagship E-magazine for iPad, which launched in February 2011.

It was seen as “an amazing vehicle for Innovation” and a significant step forward for the magazine industry.

However, with a subscription of just under $40 a year or $0.99 per week, it failed to attract enough subscribers to keep the venture afloat and with reports of $30m in losses a year.

The parent company’s Founder and CEO Rupert Murdock announced that they “could not find a large enough audience quick enough” to justify its viability going

Tech News

iTunes 11

Apple Finally released the latest upgrade to iTunes. iTunes 11 release date was delayed a number of weeks as Apple wanted more time to perfect the music application before launching to customers. iTunes 11 has been completely redesigned bring greater integration with iCloud. The new layout of the music player brings a cleaner and effortless way to play and organise your media library. One of the top new features includes ‘up next’ a playlist of upcoming tracks that can be easily edited, reordered or removed. Adding a track to up next is so simple with a drag and drop gesture.

The iTunes store has also been revamped, however for Irish customers there is still no sign of TV show’s to be available for rent or purchase. iTunes 11 is available to download free for Mac, iOS and PC.

Netflix and Disney

Movie streaming service Netflix has recently struck a substantial deal with one of the worlds Largest entertainment Companies.

The deal with Disney will see Netflix’s library collection grow significantly with many of Disney’s classics making Netflix’s kiddies collection a haven for children’s entertainment. But the deal also includes

to purchase songs, movies, app, or ebooks from Apple iTunes store.

Gift cards come in €15, €25, €50 or €100.

Available at: Apple.ie | CompuB | Tesco | Many more outlets

Netflix Subscription Gift cards

Know someone who loves Netflix or Streaming Movies and TV shows online.

Then a Netflix subscription gift card might be perfect for that someone. Netflix Gift card subscriptions give registered users access to the Netflix Library that carries a wide variety of Movies and TV shows to cater for all tastes.

content from Disney’s other studios like Pixar animation, Marvel Studios, Disneynature and more. What’s more significant is, from 2016 Netflix will become Disney’s exclusive distributor for movies during the ‘Pay TV Window’. This is a major boost for Netflix to have New Titles something it currently lacks.

With Netflix’s diverse platforms including Computers, Mobile devices, Game consoles and Internet enabled TV’s Netflix is becoming a very attractive subscription service, especially for families .

The Appys 2012

You’ve heard of the Oscars and the IFTA’s, well what about the Irish Appys. The Appys are awards for best App developments and designs. This year the Appy’s took place on November 29th in the Aviva Dublin.

The award first began in 2010 and has become an annual award ceremony, recognising innovation in applications for mobile, Social media and TV industry.

There are Categories for applications like Best Coupon/deal App and Best Educational/Kids app.

AIB mobile banking App won for Best Banking App, While Sky + won for Best Entertainment App, while Taxi Service Halo, Picked up the biggest award the Grand Prix Award for their Mobile app.

The Halo App is so simple to use, just a few clicks and you can pin point your location to book a cab, and choice whether to pay with cash or through the app.

The App even lets you watch in real time the route your Taxi Driver is traveling and also contact your driver at the touch of a button.

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griffiti at the Movies

Cert: 12A Release date: 1st January 2013 Running time: 114 mins “The most scary bit for me – when I came up, I was all on my own”

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he Impossible tells the harrowing true story of one family’s fight for survival, when the Tsunami hit South East Asia, on St. Stephens’ day, in 2004.

Directed by Juan Antonio Bayona, and written by Sergio G. Sanchez, The Impossible stars: Ewan McGregor, Naomi Watts and Tom Holland.

The film opens to darkness, and all you can hear is the deafening roaring of rushing water. Immediately it indicates the type of journey that lies before you; it has anticipation, likened to ascending on a terrifying rollercoaster ride.

Then the darkness awakens to the picturesque landscapes of a luxury tropical holiday resort, in South East Asia.

The family that the story centres around consists of; Dad Henry (McGregor) Mum Maria (Watts) eldest son Lucas (Holland) and his two younger siblings, Simon and Thomas.

Happiness is evident as the family arrive at their hotel, and take in the splendour of where they are to spend the festivities of the Christmas period.

The exotic backdrop of night time adds a relative poetic calmness to the moment, as holiday makers send-off flying lanterns from the beach front.

Morning breaks and it is St. Stephens’ day; the family are at the beach-front pool of their luxury accommodation. Then, much to the horror of all on screen and off; a thundering

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violent wall of crushing water barges through the tranquillity.

As the water hits, there is the effect of slow motion. Again, you find yourself being plunged into darkness and all you can hear amid the torrents of water is, panic, screams and destruction. The ‘nothingness’ is quite powerful and creates a helpless feeling. It is not what you can see that terrifies you; it is what you can imagine is happening.

The Impossible takes you on a devastating journey of fear, sadness and heartbreak. Amid sorrow and anguish, the story that follows with the family centrepiece is one of human vulnerability. The kindness and compassion of strangers is poignant in the wake of the unpredicted disaster. To watch this movie, is a humbling experience and it reminds you, just how fragile and powerless human life is, against the forces of Mother Nature. The Impossible epically captures the full force wreck that the Tsunami created and left behind, for human life as well as livelihoods. It also conveys every family’s hellish nightmare, of having your loved ones literally wrenched from your arms in the blink of an eye.

There are scenes of gore during and after the Tsunami hits the island so be warned.

The fact that this was one of the largest natural disasters to hit in recent times is portrayed in stark vividness and becomes violently clear to the audience.

Grainne Kennedy

Death of a Superhero

Cert:15A Release Date: Out Now! Running time: 98 mins “Life is a Sexually Transmitted Disease, it’s spread by people having sex and then in the end it kills ya”

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eing a teenager often involves acting as though everything is a matter of life and death, but that’s pretty much the case in Ian FitzGibbon’s comingof-age-while-dying-of-cancer romance “Death of a Superhero.”

Adapted from a novel by Andrew McCarten (incidentally written by him) the film relocates the story from New Zealand to Dublin and has the virtues of a strong cast. But its chief onscreen innovation is the way it swings between animation and live-action characters, a daredevil trapeze act that keeps it from succumbing to the boredom that only over sentimental films can achieve and helps to distract from an otherwise fairly rudimentary narrative.

The cartoons are a product of the imagination of Donald (Brodie-Sangster) and they that feature his muscle bound, mute alter ego as well as his arch enemy, the Glove, a villain with syringes for fingers.

This was undoubtedly a challenging role for Brodie-Sangster in that Donald is not an object of pity; he’s funny and keeps things in perspective, except when his fuming anger gets the better of him, prompting the misbehavior that keeps his parents on tenterhooks.

Andy Serkis, who plays Dr. Adrian King, the unorthodox death therapist, or thanatol-

ogist, to whom Donald’s parents bring their son and with whom he forms a bond. Serkis in this movie is something of a revelation, perhaps because his best-known roles have him disguised as something otherworldly or animalistic (Caesar in the recent “Rise of the Planet of the Apes,” for instance, or Gollum in the “Lord of the Rings” trilogy), and here is very human indeed and displays his new found humanity very effectively indeed, offering Donlad a mentor character while never getting too Miyagi on our asses.

FitzGibbon’s other natural resource is the superb Aisling Loftus (“Oranges and Sunshine”) as Shelly, a wry, acerbic teen who seems to be 16 going on 37 and gives Donald precisely what he needs: a reason to feel attractive and alive to someone other than his parents.

Death of a Superhero” doesn’t sugarcoat anything, neither cancer nor the awkward, unpleasant ways people deal with it.

FitzGibbon (“Perrier’s Bounty”) has achieved something special; even a late scene, in which Donald’s friends (with Dr. King as an accomplice) arrange for a prostitute to ensure that Donald doesn’t die a virgin, is handled well.

Much of the credit for this goes to Jessica Schwarz who played one of the more sensitive hookers in recent cinema history.

Daniel Egan

griffiti at the Movies GIRLFRIEND

Cert: PG Release date: Out Now! Running time: 97 mins

F

“Am I on your naughty list?”

“Ha! You how the record!”

irmly rooted in tales from childhood, Rise Of The Guardians re-imagines the most well-known figures from children’s imaginations as a team of ass kicking super heroes. Santa Claus (Alec Baldwin), the Easter Bunny (Hugh Jackman), the Tooth Fairy (Isla Fisher), and the Sandman are the Guardians, keeping the children of the world safe from harm.

When an ancient enemy, Pitch Black (Jude Law), threatens not only the world but the Guardians themselves, Jack Frost (Chris Pine) is brought in as their newest recruit.

First and foremost, this movie is an immense amount of fun. Story-wise however, it doesn’t come close to the mighty Pixar. The plot simply isn’t dense enough to keep an adult audience’s attention for 97 minutes.

There is a rich vein of humour running through it though, especially the inhabitants of Santa’s workshop. Much has been made of Santa’s elves but it’s really the yeti’s you should look out for, the put-upon toy painter being the stand-out.

The chemistry between the lead characters is simply a delight, sparking off each other effortlessly, and making proceedings that extra bit more enjoyable. The visuals are also a triumph, really helped by a sheen of 3D. It is one of the most unique

kids films in a long time, with the character and location designs being out of this world. There is a real sense of wonder in each scene, from the Sandman weaving dreams to life to the Easter Bunny bounding thorough underground tunnels.

The cast also add to the fun, with Alec Baldwin knocking it out of the park as a strangely eastern European Santa Claus.

He puts his all into the role, throwing out zingers left, right and center.

Hugh Jackman brings his usual hardman persona to a giant bunny rabbit with fantastic results, and Jude law inhabits the perfect villain, full of snarling menace, but the more the film goes, he loses his impact somewhat. Chris Pine and Isla Fisher play their roles well enough, but we are left with the feeling that they could have offered more had it been a longer film.

As for The Sandman? For a character that is mute for the entirety of the picture, he became an extremely entertaining character. His habit of communicating through symbols popping out of his head proved an effective form of communication while accentuating the overall magical feel of the film.

An extremely fun and unique trip to the cinema, there is enough here to keep the kids( But maybe not the big kids), happy for an hour and a half.

Jenny Murphy

Cert:15A Release Date: Out Now! Running time: 94 mins “You know what happened in my house yesterday, can that be our secret?”

“Yes, it will”

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s the first feature film from director Justin Lerner, Girlfriend is a sometimes predictable but lovable tale. It is the story of young man with Down’s syndrome, Evan, who has been in love with a girl on his street, Candy, forever.

Evan is an adorable character who any audience would instantly love. He works in a restaurant in their small town and lives with his mother, who is extremely protective of him.

When Evan finds himself with a large sum of money, with no clue what to do with it, his opportunity strikes.

Girlfriend is quite backwards in its portrayal of women. Candy, the female lead, has had a difficult life, she is a young mother who is in an abusive relationship and is finding it impossible to pay her bills. She is constantly struggling with money and her waste-of-space jealous boyfriend who has no interest in trying to support their young son.

When Candy can’t pay her rent and is almost being evicted, that’s when Evan steps in and gives her the money. This for Evan means that Candy is now his girlfriend, but for the audience it’s painfully clear that Candy will never be his girlfriend or pay back the money, yet she accepts it from him over several excruciating, you-want-to-cover-your-eyes scenes in which she offers

some skin out of feelings of pity. Meanwhile, Candy’s ex-boyfriend, Russ, hangs around, it seems, just so he can also take advantage of Evan, using him to get information on Candy and misleadingly telling him she gets aroused by—spoilers herein—being smacked around. If that wasn’t despicable enough, Russ bottoms out when he takes Evan’s love money.

Cash is the engine of “Girlfriend,” but given that its origins here are so shaky, the rest of the movie is on uncertain footing. The sexual question raised by Evan is intriguing, but with the exception of Evan, “Girlfriend” is populated by some dislikeable characters (the triangular subplot concerning Russ, Candy and her married boyfriend, played

by Jerad Anderson, is cliché).

With Girlfriend, we’re shown a story told through the lens of Murphy’s Law: Evan has the disadvantage of being developmentally challenged and, as one might assume, is eaten alive when forced to live on his own. The movie presents a fresh take on love, struggle and family in contemporary society. . As Lerner’s first attempt at a feature film it was quite impressive, the characters were sometimes enjoyable but the story doesn’t present us with anything life-affirming, challenging, or expectation-beating about a lead character with Down’s.

Aimee Doyle

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Music Yellowcard. The instrumentals are pretty basic. The patterns in the guitars and drums have been used by them and other bands quite a few times. Still, it’s a highly enjoyable song.

Always Summer This song was the first single from the album. It also had a music video released for it a few weeks before the album made its debut. It’s an enjoyable song with good instrumentation and vocal work.

Here I Am Alive If there was a song that Yellowcard changed their style for, it’s this one. They went with the whole pop-rock feel of music. It’s a decent song with an INSANELY catchy chorus.

S

outhern Air is the eighth studio album by the rock band, YellowcardRecorded

by Hopeless Records.

As a lot of fans may know,Yellowcard just came off of their indefinite hiatus last summer.

Even though they released a rather impressive album before this one, It was a toss of the coin as to whether or not they would still have it when they released this one.

While it’s still not as impressive as their Paper Walls album, this still delivers a powerful punch and really sets the bar for modern rock music. A lot of bands these days change their style as they go on with different albums that they

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create, but not Yellowcard.

Even after two albums since their hiatus, they remain the same with their musical style.

The lyrics, for the most part, haven’t really changed a lot either. Here’s a track-by-track look at Southern Air. Awakening This song really sets this album off like a stick of dynamite. With a soft intro leading up to a powerhouse instrumental, this song can be enjoyed by almost any rock fan.

Surface of the Sun The lyrics here are typical of

Sleep In The Snow This song, honestly, is crap. I mean, it’s alright, but that’s it.

It’s nothing special. It seems like they ran out of ideas when they were writing the instrumentals. On the other hand, the lyrics and vocal work are somewhat catchy.

A Vicious Kind The instrumentals and vocal work is typical for the band on this track and it’s nothing I’ve never heard before by the band. It’s a decent song with some catchy vocal work and some decently written lyrics.

Telescope The only song on this album that’s totally ho-hum. The vocal work and instrumentals are a bit boring and it tries too hard

to fit into the tracklisting.

Rivertown Blues This upbeat song starts off a bit cluttered, but it progresses into a pretty great song. The vocal work, percussion, and instrumental blend is near perfection.

Ten The lyrics are sad, but it’s a subject that Yellowcard has never covered before. The lead singer, Ryan Key goes deep into his personal life about how when he was young and how he messed up by getting his girlfriend pregnant and having the baby aborted because they were too young to have kids.

The lyrics are just beautiful and it really shows you that he has a heart and that he regrets doing what he did. Once again, it’s a side of Yellowcard that I’ve never seen before.

Southern Air The album’s titular song puts a pretty great close on the album. While it’s not as big as the closing song on their previous album, it still honorably pushes the album to a fantastic finish.

Bottom line, this is a highly enjoyable album. People who will like this album are fans of Yellowcard, and rock music buffs. If this matches your criteria, or if you need something fresh to listen to on your iPod, I definitely recommend you give this album a shot.

John Enright

Interview

The Rubberbandits Do you like being interviewed?

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he last time Griffiti Spoke with The Rubberbandits they were just starting work on their new show and beginning to gain notoriety outside Ireland. Griffiti checks in with Mr. Chrome on the Duo’s success since then Griffiti: Do you like being interviewed?

Mr. Chrome: No, I fucking hate it. Well, I don’t mind it if it’s on the phone but I hate doing press days when your being asked the same questions again and again and again. Your waling around and you’ll do about 20 interviews a day and they’ll all ask you the same thing. It just gets repetitive.

And then you have the likes of the Daily Mail who are a shower of cunts because all they want to do is try to get us to admit that we’re racists. All because we have that one song ‘Black Man’.

They’re saying ‘you said the words ‘Black Man’ in a song, that’s racist’. That’s the angle they were going with. And it’s not, we were just commenting on stereotypical movies, you’ve always got to have a black guy in a tough gang. We said, grand, we’re racists!

Griffiti: Last time were spoke you we working on a TV program. How did that go?

Mr. Chrome: That’s finished now. We only did a pilot, it’s called The Rubberbandits would you believe. It was on Channel 4. I can’t really say anything about it now.

It’s going to be music and comedy and

everything like that but that’s all I can give away.

Griffiti: Has your success outside Ireland continued?

Mr. Chrome: Ya, well it’s kind of pointless doing anything in Ireland because there’s no one around. There all gone to Australia. So we had a show over in Edinburgh. Also, we met Dane Bowers when we were over at a cage fight in London and he wants to do a musical with us. He is mad about the idea and I’ve been a big fan of Dane Bowers for years, I think he’s great. We want to get a Celtic orchestra, get a few fiddle and banjo players and mix that with a kind of classical music and then Dane Bowers will put his beats to it.

Griffiti: How often do you change your bags?

Mr. Chrome: I don’t bother changing it.

I want mine to have a bit of character, you know?

The plastic bag and the skin need time to get to know each other. Once you give it a chance the plastic matches the PH of you skin. If I leave my bag on long enough I find

“

myself in a constant state of exfoliation. I’ve got the facial skin of a baby’s thigh. So I’ll wear a bag until it’s ready to fall off. Plastic doesn’t deteriorate, you know?

Griffiti: Do you still do the odd prank phone call or is that a thing of the past?

Mr. Chrome: I’d love to but I haven’t done that now in about six years I tried to do it over the summer but as soon as we start to talk they know who it is and that’s the problem.

Griffiti: Do the two of you ever get sick of each other?

Mr. Chrome: No, Jesus, no. We sleep in the same bed and everything. What we do to keep the relationship going is we surprise each other all the time. I’ll walk into a room and he’ll hide in the corner and he’ll jump up and frighten me.

And I’ll maybe climb up a tree then jump down on his head. Or if he’s on a date with a girl I’ll arrive at the restaurant and throw coffee in her face.

Griffiti: Pleaseure talking to you again.

Mr. Chrome: Nice one, cuz!

We met Dane Bowers in London and he wants to do a musical with us

” 23

In Christmas Photography Focus

Mark Talbot

Aoife Drum-Towell

Dominika Grmanova

Mark Talbot

Sylwia Pytlarzl

Pamela O’Donnell

Pamela O’Donnell

Creative Writing

When it’s time D

By Daniel James

r. Michael Quinn’s stethoscope moved carefully over Sinead McNamara’s barley moving chest. He had been examining her for almost half an hour. Her husband, Diarmaid had not left her side in this time.

He had not left her side over the past two days except to feed their six year old son, Sean.

Dr. Quinn straightened up, turning to face Diarmaid. The doctor was a good head shorter than Diarmaid, with a stern face and a receeding hairline. He seemed neither relieved nor perturbed by the findings of his examination. He seemed completely indifferent.

“What’s wrong with my wife?” Asked Diarmaid.

“Honestly,” said the doctor “I don’t know. Several of her organs seem to be failing. I have never seen anything like it before. Her condition may even be unique. I am reminded of lupus, but more aggressive, far more aggressive. She is deteriorating rapidly. Frankly, I do not think we will have time to complete tests.”

“So, what should we do?” Said Diarmaid.

“Should we take her to the hospital on the

mainland?”

“Do not be foolhardy, Mr. McNamara, there is a storm outside. Getting on a boat now would be suicide. No, I suggest that you make her as comfortable as possible right here. I will have her test results on Monday. But, as I say, I do not expect her to live to see them. I am sorry.”

He did not sound sorry. He had the business-like tone of a man who had told innumerable people that the love of their life was about to die. Before Diarmaid could say another word the doctor had turned and left the room.

Diarmaid dropped to his knees beside the bed and squeezed his wife’s hands in his own. Her fingers were skeletal thin, they rubbed together like stones. Her eyes were dark, sunken holes. Her emaciated face, so beautiful only days before was gaunt, her cheekbones like sharp pieces of flint, threatening to penetrate her skin.

Dairmaid did not believe in God. He had not gone to mass in over seven years and had not prayed in much longer than that.

But, kneeling beside his wife’s deathbed, he prayed for hours.

Diarmaid kept his eyes closed the entire

time. He drifted in and out of a half sleep, exhausted after two nights of restless anxiety and was now soothed by the crashing of the waves on the cliffs outside of their home. The wind howled and the rain splattered on the window, but he was safe inside with Sinead, with the women he loved.

He did not open his eyes until there came a noise from the bedroom door. His eyes opened slowly and were met by the sight of his son standing at the doorway holding his teddy bear, George, who he took with him everywhere. Diarmaid did not speak. He couldn’t, now dazed by half sleep and grief for his dying wife.

“Daddy.” Sean said. There was no reply.

“Daddy, I think the lady outside is sick like Mommy. She’s crying.”

Diarmaid did not hear his son. Still half asleep.

“I think Daddy’s asleep.” Sean told George and left the room closing the door behind him as his father had thought him was polite. Diarmaid’s dreamlike state continued for a long time more or perhaps no time at all. Then is son was back in the room.

“She’s really sad, Daddy, she wants to come in. It’s very wet outside.”

It looked to have been carved from weathered wood by someone who had only the vaguest idea what human faces were supposed to look like 26

“What?” Said Diarmaid, finally snapping out of it. “What was that, Sean?”

“She wants to come in.” repeated Sean.

It took Diarmaid a moment to register this. Then realised that someone must be here to see Sinead.

“Let them in so, Sean, tell them Mommy’s here in bed.”

“Okay!” said Sean closing the door behind him again.

Diarmaid heard his son open the front door down the hallway. There was a flash of lightning and all the lights in house suddenly went out leaving the couple in completely darkness.

From the hallway, Diarmaid heard slow, bare, wet footsteps on the wooden floor.

They stopped and the bedroom door creaked open.

Silhouetted in the doorway was what seemed to be a woman. Tall and thin with long hair coming down well below her waistline. She suddenly began to sob violently, causing her whole body to shake. She stepped forward.

“Who are you?” Said Diarmaid.

The stranger did not answer but continued toward the bed.

“Get out of my house.” He shouted.

Sinead was roused by the shout.

‘Diar-maid.’ She said weakly Then her eyes fell open the stranger.

There was another flash of lightning. Sinead made a little whine that would have been a scream had she been able.

The lightning had thrown the strangers face into sharp relief, and it was a face unlike any Diarmaid had ever seen in his life. It looked to have been carved from weathered wood by someone who had only the vaguest idea what human faces were supposed to look like. It was pearly white and had the look of dead flesh that had been allowed to rot underwater. Its eyes were unfocused and almost completely obscured by bright silver hair coming down over its face.

Most frightening of all though was its mouth. It was elongated and gaping, several times the size of a normal persons mouth.

The room went dark again but the grotesque face was so pale it seemed to give off a faint glow and was still visible to the petrified couple. Diarmaid stood up.

“I said get out of our house.” He said, his voice trembling.

But the stranger took another slow, almost feeble step towards Diarmaid’s dying wife. Diarmaid let go of Sinead’s clawlike hand and took three steps toward the stranger who was now halfway between the door and the bed.

He was terrified, his hands shaking. But his love for his wife and his need to protect her gave him courage he never knew he had. He made to push the stranger out of the room but it suddenly made a lightning fast movement. It raised one of its scabbed, putrid hands and caressed Diarmaid face.

It felt ice cold on his skin. More than that, he could feel it spread throughout his body,

to the tips of his fingers. He could feel it in his lunges and in his heart. His legs became weak. He could not move. He fell painfully against the wall propping him up in a sitting position his face lolling to one side so he could see his wife lying helplessly in bed. The stranger continued uninhibited towards her still sobbing.

It reached the bed and Diarmaid looked on in immobile horror as it bent down over his wife. It was now crying uncontrollably, taking sharp, deep breaths which quickly became longer and deeper as if it was trying to suck something more than air from its surroundings.

Sinead tried to raise a hand to push it away but she was far to weak, it only can up a few inches above the sheets.

The stranger gave a final blood curdling cry, more like a scream and Sinead’s hand fell lifelessly back onto the sheets. The stranger straightened up and looked directly at Diarmaid and made another small sob an Diarmid was taken over by darkness.

Diarmaid awoke the next morning still sitting on the floor. He could move now

though. He sprang to his wife beside and shook her hard but it was no use, she was dead. Unable to stay in the room any longer he went into the kitchen to find his son eating cereal.

“You made your own breakfast.” Diarmaid croaked. “You’ve never done that before.”

“You wouldn’t wake up and the sad lady took Mommy away last night.”

“You saw that happen?” Dairmaid asked.

His son did not answer. Diarmaid decided not to push the matter. Then he noticedsomething else new, George wasn’t with Sean at the table. Sean never ate any meal without George.

“Where’s george?” He asked. “He’ll be sad if he knows you’re having breakfast without him.”

“George is only a teddy, Daddy. He isn’t real.”

In one traumatising night, Diarmaid had lost his wife, had seen something that would haunt his dreams and waking hours for the rest of his life and his son had been forced to grow up far too, quickly loosing the precious innocence of a six year old.

27

THE GENUINE ARTICLE

Love Fix Single Males seeks double-jointed supermodel who brews her own beer, has access to free concert tickets and an open minded twin sister Believes that if it’s meant to be you will meet naturally rendering this personal ad redundant (He’s just board at the moment)

So long. and thanks for all the facts The Almighty Mayan Calender

Griffith College’s plan for dealing with the end of the Mayan Calendar and the possible loss of students that it may entail By Drew Peacock 28

E

arlier this year the college began dealing with an issue. This issue has been creating a lot of bother for a lot of people and we mean A LOT of people. To put it into perspective, think; most people on and around the planet.

More or less the same number of people whose minds were afforded ill-ease as the millennium and the immanence of global meltdown was upon us and people were sure that Y2K was going to make their computers attack them and planes were going to fall from the sky .

It’s worse this time though. We are talking, of course, about the end of the Mayan Calendar and, subsequently, The World.

Now, it is worth mentioning that Scholars from various disciplines have dismissed

the idea of such cataclysmic events occurring in 2012 but these are the same guys who thought that the world was flat for Aztec’s sake, so we found it easy to dismiss their opinion as codswallop soup.

The fact that someone in ancient pre-Columbian Mesoamerica wasn’t fucked finishing a calendar is more than enough evidence than the Genuine Article needs to confirm the end of days.

In any case, this posed a question for the directors of our college. “What do we do with our students when there is no college to come back to?”

And so began Griffith College’s work on building a rocketship under the ‘Everybody-Wins Basketball Court’.

On December 20th 2012 at 11:59pm (approx) we will all be flown to the moon

where there is enough supplies in a newly built facility to last us up until exam time.

Exams will go ahead as normal. Then, to save on supplies, 90% of students (the ones who scored least well on their exams) will be ejected from the facility. We will be left with a super intelligent band of nerds who, in the absence of jocks and beauty queens, will thrive and hopefully will know what to do then.

This is because the college directors certainly don’t know. This plan was put together on a Friday evening, they were supposed to have gone home an hour ago, everyone was a bit peeved because the coffee was cold and in absolute terror of missing the Late Late Toy show they simply said “Look we’ll bring them to the moon and they can sort it out themselves, alright.”

And that is why we are going to the moon.

See you there.

Above: Student Moon Colony

NEWS IN BRIEF

No lasting injuries on Ice Skating Trip SU in relations with Business Faculty, Media Faculty jealous Psychics predict that world didn’t end on December 21st Law Faculty accidentally sues itself Connemarrathon Charity money is just ‘resting’ is SU’s account

Under the

Spotlight

Claire Aston

Occupation: Buggered if we know. Getting students high or something Greatest Ambition: To feature in ‘Under the Spotlight’ Hobbies: Making odd noises in inappropriate places especially the deli at Spar Likes: Ladders, advent calenders, odd noises

Student Council appoints council to councel councellors

Dislikes: People mistaking her strawberry blonde hair for being ginger

Cows escape from local field. Fencing Society Outraged

Interesting fact: Is the only know person to suffer from Bobble-Cynophobia (fear of bobble-head dogs) and screams if the name “Churchill” is uttered

Student set out to write assignment, ends up finding 1,705 anagrams for procrastination

29

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