Dispelling the Myths Around Foster Care

By Holly Coates, MS UMFS Regional Director for the South and West region

May is National Foster Care month, making this the perfect time to talk about foster care, a subject that is out-of-sight, out-of-mind for most of us.

But here in Southwest Virginia, foster care is top of mind for a great many people, especially the hundreds of kids in our region – in Roanoke and Salem, in Botetourt and Franklin – who are in the state’s foster care system. They wake up many mornings not sure if they will sleep in the same place that night, if they will be in the same school, wondering if they ever will be able to settle into one place.

Foster children come in many shapes and sizes. There’s Celia,* age sixteen, who just wants to be able to spend time with her friends, get a job, and learn to drive. Brian* is eleven and wants to be on a basketball team. Alyssa* is thirteen and likes to read and wants to be a singer.

If these kids sound a lot like the ones you already know, then you recognize what so many people do not. Foster children are like every other kid. That includes the desire to be loved, live in a stable, safe and caring home, and be treated like every other child they know.

Among the persistent myths about foster kids is that they have done something wrong. No, their only transgression was to be born into circumstances that made it unsafe for them to continue to live at home. They could be victims of abuse or neglect or live in a home struggling to make ends meet.

Foster care is not necessarily a permanent arrangement. One in two foster kids eventually returns to their primary caregivers, a decision made by a judge in coordination with social services.

Myths also persist when it comes to what it takes to become a foster parent. Did you know foster parents need not be married or own a home? In assessing their suitability, we put a priority on their maturity and capacity to provide a stable environment.

The prospect that Celia, Brian and

Alyssa and the many other foster care children in the Roanoke Valley will find foster parents has become more and more challenging. For a variety of reasons, demand for foster parents is far outpacing supply, and the myths surrounding foster care are compounding the situation.

At UMFS, one of our goals is to make the process easier. We provide training and support for foster parents, so they feel confident and ready to impact the life of a child or teenager every step of the way.

Now that you know the facts, if you are interested in exploring what it takes to be a foster parent, I encourage you to contact UMFS. We have regular sessions that explain the process, the demands….and yes, the rewards of foster parenthood.

(*the children’s names have been changed to protect their privacy)

Visit UMFS.org/foster to learn more about fostering through UMFS.