STUFF & THINGS

BY JON TAYLOR

Putting It Out There

Every so often the concept of death springs to mind. There’s an upbeat opening line for you! It happens relatively regularly. I’m wandering along, minding my own business, usually heading to work and I ponder what it’ll be like when my parents die and whether I’ll be able to cope. What’ll I do without them to guide and help me through things? I also think about my own death and whether I’ll be on my own when it happens as I don’t have a partner or children, so I ponder whether it’ll be days or weeks before I’m found. You know, cheerful stuff like that! Really starts the day off with a bang. Sometimes the thoughts go away without any problem, sometimes they stick.

“The worst thing you can do is nothing. Don’t over think and wallow. It gets us nowhere. In the immortal words of our Eurovision entry from 2016, Joe & Jake – ‘You’re not alone, we’re in this together’”

It’s part and parcel of life, I guess, but for me it’s also mixed up in the whole anxiety/depression world that I inhabit. It goes with the territory. I find it helps my mental state enormously that when I start having these thoughts, it’s best to acknowledge them, look at them and get some outside help with them. Squirrelling the thoughts away just makes them fester and grow. The help usually comes by popping a post on social media. It helps to get the thoughts out of my head and into the more caring arms of my friends. They help by posting life-affirming and encouraging things which help clear my head and move on to thinking about other things like ‘Why does Tess Daley still not seem natural in front of camera after all these years?’.

“So, in the upcoming weeks and months, with a potentially tricky winter ahead of us, don’t hide yourself away. Don’t sit in the dark. It can be a hard thing to do, asking for help”

This time of year doesn’t help either. Nights are drawing in; everything is darker; if you live alone then nights seem longer; you don’t go out as much; you spend more time on your own, and so on. Walking to work in the dark then walking home again in the dark is particularly grim. It’s very easy for the gloomy weather outside to permeate your head and turn it equally as gloomy. You’d think that after having to lockdown so many times and isolate and what have you, you’d get used to being on your own more and be accustomed to your own company. And it’s fine for a while but we are social animals, us humans, so it can be a strain. Best to do something about it.

So, in the upcoming weeks and months, with a potentially tricky winter ahead of us, don’t hide yourself away. Don’t sit in the dark. It can be a hard thing to do, asking for help. Do it once though and it becomes much easier to do the second time around. I know that after I reach out for help, however I do it, everything seems much brighter and the gloom clears. The worst thing you can do is nothing. Don’t over think and wallow. It gets us nowhere. In the immortal words of our Eurovision entry from 2016, Joe & Jake – ‘You’re not alone, we’re in this together’.