JULY | AUGUST 2016
OVERCOMING CHALLENGES ISSUE
OUR MIND IS OUR GREATEST CHALLENGE FINDING YOUR WHY WHEN YOU DISLIKE YOUR JOB WHERE THERE’S A WILL ... THERE IS A WAY FACE THE TRUTH OVERCOMING OBSTACLES IN YOUR LIFE AND REFRESHING IT WITH JOY
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Table of Letter From the Editor Contents Life is beautiful, and the truth is it comes with its challenges. None of us are exempt from situations in life. While some are easy to deal with others are a bit harder. But, we all have them. Amazing as life is we always have the opportunities to help us overcome them and that’s what this issue is about. This issue is dedicated to help you overcome your challenges, be they what they are. Love & Light to you always,
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Our Mind is Our Greatest Challenge
6
Finding Your WHY When You Dislike Your Job
9
Where there’s a Will ... There is a Way
13
Face the Truth:
16
Overcoming Obstacles in Your Life and Refreshing it With Joy
by Angie Romero by Gail Godreau
by Mara Turnbull by Rita Oliver
by Minister Ginger London
HappierHealthierWomen.com
July 2016 | 2
Our Mind is Our Greatest Challenge By ANGIE ROMERO
Let’s begin with the definition of the actual word -- challenge: noun 1. a call to take part in a contest or competition, especially a duel. 2. an objection or query as to the truth of something, often with an implicit demand for proof. verb 1. invite (someone) to engage in a contest. 2. dispute the truth or validity of. Now the word overcome verb 1. to get the better of in a struggle or conflict; conquer; defeat:
No wonder the phrase “overcome challenges” has such a powerful force behind it.
It’s the marriage of two words that teaches your mind that although you will face situations in your life, you do have the power and strength to conquer and defeat them. Even if sometimes you don’t see it or feel it. HappierHealthierWomen.com
July 2016 | 3
The truth is, we all have challenges in our life.
Whatever that challenge is for you, the first thing to know is …. It’s Ok. Take a deep breath and let it out. Because while it may seem like the world is coming to an end, everything is falling apart, and you see no hope in sight …. the truth really isn’t so.
Personal Story As I said, we all have our challenges. Yes, me included because while I’m a holistic therapist, life coach, and ThetaHealer, it doesn’t mean I don’t sometimes fall into the trap of feeling overwhelmed with my life’s challenges. Why? Because above everything else, I’m human. I have fears and struggles, highs and lows, wins and losses just like everyone else. About two months ago, I was personally dealing with one of my life challenges. I felt anxious, nervous and couldn’t see any light at the end of the tunnel. I was beating myself up mentally and emotionally over this situation. I was blaming other people and things outside of my control for my situation. Blaming them for how I felt, and being so unhappy at the situation that I felt at a total loss what to do. This led me to feel resentful and upset all the time. And, if you know me personally, you know that’s not me. Typically, I don’t resent anyone and I always try to be happy. Isn’t it ironic how when we are faced with our own inner struggles and challenges even our emotions get high jacked?
Well, it wasn’t until I was able to realize that it was my mind that was keeping me in this situation. In other words, I was able to change my perception, to view things differently, when I finally released the tension going on and was able to actually do something positive towards overcoming my facing opponent (my challenge). HappierHealthierWomen.com
Below are the 3 things that I did to help me get through it.
1. I asked for help.
Yup, as plain and simple as that, and yet it amazes me how difficult this beautiful process really can be when you are ‘caught up in the hell of it’. To be open and vulnerable enough to go to someone and say “Hey, I’m really struggling and going through this and this and this….. and I don’t know what to do. Can you please help me?”
Now, major word of caution:
Be very thoughtful of who you ask for help. For example, although family and friends may mean well, not everyone is the right person to help you get through certain challenges in life. They might have their own ‘opinion’ of what you should or shouldn’t do, or simply put they might just not have the proper answers you particularly need. In my case, I did happen to reach out to two wonderful people in my life. Both these gentlemen took their time, patience and love to hear me out. They each provided me their loving yet strategic and objective point of view on my situation. No biased opinions, no “you should or shouldn’t” do this, etc. Each time we spoke, it allowed me see more and more my own situation from two very different points of view than just my own. This caused me to get a hold of my thoughts and be able to sort them through more strategically. Here’s the thing: the moment my mind received different input on how to view and act upon this situation in my life, the more July 2016 | 4
I consciously realized it was my mind (my very own thinking) that was seeing this challenge as so big, monstrous and overwhelming . . . and it really wasn’t. To make my point a little visual for you, while I felt that my challenge was the size of a massive unmovable mountain, their input helped me realize that maybe it was just a pretty big rock. That if I can move my head (thoughts) to the right or left of it, then maybe I can find once again the road it was blocking.
2. I got a hold of my emotions through my thoughts.
Of course, calming down my mind helped get my emotions in control. This we learn through meditation, relaxation techniques and even being away on vacation! Lol Once my thoughts became a little clearer, I started asking myself intentionally if the people I was blaming for my situation really were to be blamed? The answer, of course, was no. And yet, for so long I had believed the entire script and narrative my mind had created. A narrative that became a very strong belief system, and those beliefs caused me such emotional distress.
Moral of my story Although I did have a ‘challenging’ situation in front of me, my very own thoughts made this situation far worse than it really was. To end, I just want to say that even though my situation wasn’t life threatening, I felt like it was. Some of you may actually be going through something much more threating, even more challenging, you may be in pain and feel lost and confused.
Please know . . . that whatever challenge
crosses your path in life, you can always find another way to approach and deal with the situation at hand. Find a way to change those disempowering thoughts. Change that negative narrative that you keep hearing inside your head. Help yourself find peace first and above everything else. Find someone, seek help and reach out to those you believe can help you. You are not alone, and this challenge (whatever it maybe) you will overcome one way or another.
Emotional distress because of my ‘thoughts’. I mean, ok, enough already.
3. I physically moved my body. Physical movement and exercise is proven to calm down the mind. And, I did this in two ways: exercise and putting myself through some bioenergetics exercises. See, our thoughts create emotions, and if not properly released or expressed these pent down emotions get locked in our body. Through physical movement we allow our bodies to release the emotions which allows our minds to be clearer. HappierHealthierWomen.com
Angie Romero is a Holistic
Practitioner, Life and Wellness Coach for Women and a Marketing & Business Coach for Healers. She is also the Editor & Publisher of Happier Healthier Women and Holistic Houston Magazines. Recipient of VIP Woman of the Year by The National Association of Women for 2013 for her service to women worldwide to live Happier and Healthier in all areas of their life. You can follow her through her facebook pages Happier Healthier Women, Life and Wellness Coaching and Holistic Houston. July 2016 | 5
Finding Your WHY When You Dislike Your Job
I understand. I’ve been there too. I say that I went through my mid-life crisis at the age of 30. I’m grateful that it was then and not one, two or even three decades later!
By GAIL GODREAU
Work Matters. We get it. We all have to work to earn a living and provide for ourselves and our families. And, beyond just earning money, there is much evidence of the many emotional and social benefits of work. Our work becomes part of our identity, of who we are. But, let’s face it, sometimes work sucks! It can range from just not being fulfilling and meaningful to downright depleting your soul. It can feel like you have to ‘put on a mask’ or leave a part of you at home in order to go to work each day. HappierHealthierWomen.com
I was working as an Account Executive in an ad agency and was so stressed out and miserable. Don’t get me wrong – the work was interesting and I loved the people I worked with (especially the ‘creatives’ – we on the account side were referred to as ‘suits’). But the pressures were intense and the hours were gruelling. So why did I do it? It was only my second ‘real job’ since completing my MBA and I felt I had to ‘pay my dues’, especially as a woman. I had been raised on the belief that you ‘keep your nose clean’ and work hard, and you will be rewarded. But that’s not how it turned out. July 2016 | 6
No matter how hard I worked (averaging a week of overtime– unpaid – a month!), it was never enough. I dreaded going to work and I cried my way home day after day. And, when I began having physical symptoms related to the stress, I knew it was time to make a change.
Life Matters. That was a key turning point for me in my life because it was the first time I stepped back and asked myself a very important question:
What do I want? And Why? And it began many years of what I call ‘trial and learning’ to determine my core values, the type of work I wanted to do, and how to work and live with more intention, purpose and passion. And it brought me to Coaching.
What is Your Why? When I work with my private coaching clients or do speaking, I often begin with their WHY. On multiple levels. It could be: - What is your WHY in LIFE? (big WHY) - What is your WHY in your chosen profession? Your industry? Your role/level? (medium WHY) - What is your WHY with a given client or project? This meeting? This conversation? Reading this article? (small WHY)
Your WHY is important on every level because it helps you have clarity on why you’re there and what you hope to achieve. HappierHealthierWomen.com
Even if it’s something that lands on your plate from someone else (like a project handed to you by a boss), it is important to know YOUR WHY for being there. Sometimes it’s as simple as ‘because it’s part of my job’ but, then again, WHY this job? If you determine that the job is important to you, try to find your WHY for bringing your best self to this project. It could be because it reflects your professionalism, it gets you exposure/visibility in your career, it teaches you new skills, it connects you with people who can help you grow, or simply because it’s fun! It is important to find your WHY at each level or decision because it changes how you show up, how you engage, and how much fun you have while you’re there. If ‘Life is Not a Dress Rehearsal’, I Say ‘Your Business/Job is Not an Internship’. I speak to so many women who defer their JOY! They say “I’ll put myself first when…” (fill in the blank). Examples: When my kids grow up. When they move out. When they move out AGAIN. When my grandkids are older. When I retire….
Are you waiting for When? If so, I strongly urge you to take a moment, look deep inside – past the ‘I should’s’ and ‘I have to’s’, to the ‘What I REALLY want is’…and begin to create that! YOUR life matters. Your work matters. And you deserve for both to bring you prosperity and joy – now AND in the future!!
Gail Godreau
is a Professional Coach, Speaker and Consultant and owner of Lighthouse Wellness Strategies. She uses her MBA and over 25 years of business experience to help professional women and small business owners succeed in their business, achieve greater ‘Work-Life Integration’, and have more prosperity in their life. Visit her at www.lighthousewellness.ca
July 2016 | 7
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Where there’s a Will ... There is a Way By MARA TURNBULL
My karate instructor always told me “where there’s a will there is a way”. This has become my life’s’ motto when hit by challenges. I was an Australian representative in Kyokushin Karate as a full contact fighter for several years, working full time in the public service. I was in my mid 20’s when things started to go wrong I was losing energy, tired all the time, tremendous stomach cramps that put period pain to shame. It took a few years for my doctors to work out what was wrong with me. I saw GP’s, Shaman, Naturopaths’, Chinese medicine practitioners, and eventually ended up at the Gastroenterologist when I began my longest patient doctor HappierHealthierWomen.com
relationship now spanning over 12 years. My first diagnosed was ulcerated colitis (part of the Crones Disease family) the loss of bowl control is something I would not wish on anyone, its most embarrassing, painful and you soon learn where every toilet is where ever you go, and approximately how many minutes you can hold it to make it there.
This slowed me down but I still found a way to keep doing what I loved (fighting). July 2016 | 9
It was during one of my routine checks with Dr. Lee where he noticed something wasn’t right in my blood results. After a mired of doctors and specialists appointments I was diagnosed with Stage 4 Chronic Kidney Disease (CKD) and told within the next 2 years I would be on dialysis. Stubborn as I am I like to prove my doctors wrong and stretched 2 years to 6, and kept fighting while I could. I was engaged and entering end stage CKD told that my life will be seriously altered. I would need dialysis on average 3 times a week to maintain a reasonable level of heath. My body wouldn’t be able to support carrying a baby if i did choose this then would mean I’d have to go on dialysis early and put a lot of presser on my body and kidneys and a strong chance of miscarriage. Would my future husband still want me? I would also have to give up fighting as a fistula in my arm is my life line any damage to that would be serious life risk. The choice of dialysis, transplant or no treatment was explain to me but the fear of the unknown overwhelmed me. But I refused to give in no way was this going to stop me from training,
I would find a way. In 2011 I was sitting in the medical chair with this machine large enough to be a fridge, with tubes and bags hanging off it next to me, a table of surgical equipment and team of nurses surrounding. My anxiety was rising as I was practicing my breathing techniques from karate to steady myself. They tried 3 or 4 times to get a needle in my vein, which kept bombing (piercing right through). This happened a few times during my first week of dialysis, my arm was bruised, swollen and felt like it should be broken. 3 months of training I was able to have a dialysis machine at home and maintain a semi normal lifestyle. During this period I did have dark days, I didn’t like the fact my life depended on a machine. I couldn’t travel far, my energy levels dropped it was affecting my training and teaching. This wasn’t me, I needed help. My GP put me in contact with a psychologist who specialised in chronic health issues.
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The first few session I thought, “What the hell am I doing?”, but she was able
to give me the tools to work out my values, how to make the most out of my life while I had it. 7th June 2014 I got the call I never thought was coming. I got a match; I couldn’t believe it, in fact I almost past it up in disbelief until my Dr talked me around. I woke my husband up and hit the road, holding hands and crying on the way to Royal Prince Alfred hospital. I woke up early hours of the 8th laughing at the nurses reaction to the amount of pee they were collecting, surgery was a success.
Life for me changed at this point.
Mara Turnbull
is the Head Instructor and Managing Director of Turnbull Martial Arts Academy, holds her 3rd Degree black belt and has been training in Kyokushin Karate for 18 years. She has over 14 years of building confidence, fitness, health and life skills to her clients and students. Visit her at
www.turnbullacademy.com.au or follow her through Twitter and Instagram at @turnbullacademy.
How I spent my time became more important for myself and to honour my donor. I may not be able to fight anymore, but coaching others has been more rewarding. I love being a part of the community and helping others. And, now I’m able to teach my clients the importance of always finding a way to keep doing what they love.
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July 2016 | 11
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Face the Truth To Overcome Financial Obstacles You have to Face the Truth By RITA OLIVER You are probably thinking another article from another financial planner / coach / guru talking about the same old tools and tips to help you to either save or get out of debt. You are Right.
But this one is going to change it for you. Ready? Creating short and long-term Savings and Eliminating debt, are universal and common for everyone when comes to our money. Some things are the same regardless of time, past, present, future. You either have enough money or you don’t. Those that have enough money do things differently than those that don’t. HappierHealthierWomen.com
Look at the law of numbers. You cannot spend more than what you have in hand. Unfortunately, people do every day based on the advertising promoting credit cards to earn points and miles. In turn, this has led to everyone “swiping and signing” for everything like a $3.50 latte. Really. So many use credit cards or personal loans to do everyday living expenses, vacations, etc. You must eventually pay what you owe. Let’s be clear- your money only goes so far. Always has. Always will.
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You probably have asked these questions or had these discussions in your family: Why don’t I have any money? Where does it go? I got a better job paying more money, how am I still broke and strapped? I am an entrepreneur, why can’t I pay my bills for the business and my household? Will I ever get ahead?
PSYCHIC MEDIUM
VICTORIA ALVARADO
Sound familiar?? Our attitudes and behavior, who we are, comes in to play with how we manage or do not manage our money.
We formed our relationship with money or our mindset during our early adolescence years when we overheard our parents or grandparents discuss household money issues or watched them spend on everything or not save for anything. From this we formed our opinion to do the same or be totally different. Even so, your financial situation today and decisions and actions made many years ago dictates today that you either have enough or not enough. All of us have had someone give us financial advice or we read something on money tips and tools. We chose to listen, learn more, make changes or ignored it. We are creatures of habit and we stay with what we know until we reach a roadblock or obstacle to make us change. I call it the Catastrophic Event. It is a game changer. The more you are prepared for it with financial resources, the better for you.
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Channeling messages from Spirit to help you find peace, closure and the answers you need to move forward in life. To Book Your Healing Session Contact her at
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There is only one solution to overcoming any obstacle or barrier whether it is at work, life or money . . . . . . You have to face the Truth.
Simple Math The only way you are going to know the why, have enough or not enough with your money is by tracking your Cash Inflows and Outflows When you start taking a deep dive, you will find a simple answer to why:
~ You are not making enough to pay your expenses.
We all know the Truth Sets You Free. But some of us do not want to be free because we are comfortable in the space of scarcity and complaining about it to everyone. When we face the truth, you can begin and eventually overcome anything. Easier said than done, right? We do it all the time when there is something we really want for ourselves like weight loss. You have to make a lifestyle change in diet and exercise. Facing our money challenges are not any different than our weight, new job, starting a business or dealing with life issues. We have to face ourselves and our decisions and actions head on. We have to do a diagnosis - I did this and I can change this.
The Truth
~ You are spending more than you make. You have two choices to turn this around: 1. Generate more income to pay your expenses. 2. Reduce, Eliminate and Stay out of Consumer Debt.
It is not difficult. It is two decisions: consciousness of your money, and awareness of the opportunity you are given each day to change your daily personal finance attitudes, behavior and habits.
Just do the math. Rita Oliver
Money comes down to two things:
~What you Know. (Cash In your Hand i.e. checking savings, investments, etc.)
~What you Owe. (Out of your Hand i.e. mortgage, car payments, basic living expenses).
HappierHealthierWomen.com
Founder / CEO of Strategies Options and Solutions providing clients with financial planning, advisory and personal coaching. She develops realistic strategies and solutions to improve their clients’ financial outlook for today and tomorrow. Visit her at www.yourmoneytruth.net or find her on Facebook at Strategies Options and Solutions-SOS.
July 2016 | 15
Overcoming Obstacles in Your Life . . . . . . and Refreshing it With Joy By MINISTER GINGER LONDON
Do you dread dealing with any type of obstacle? Most of us do. We want life to be easy,
but it seems that obstacles continuously frustrate our efforts and limit the quality of our lives. The good news is that you can overcome the obstacles getting in the way of you living the more abundant life filled with joy and peace. There are times in life when obstacles show up out of nowhere taking a toll on you and you feel like you’ll never overcome them. But, there’s also the belief that the only way to experience true joy is to first overcome obstacles in your life.
Obstacles can actually be a blessing! HappierHealthierWomen.com
Obstacles are often the path to great success and achievement. Obstacles can be great opportunities. But just how do you overcome obstacles and any darkness, replacing them with joy when they seem unmovable? July 2016 | 16
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The key is to identify other things that bring you joy and peace, and infiltrate your obstacles and dark spaces with these things. Strategies like these can help you conquer obstacles and any darkness in your life:
1. It begins with the ability to perceive the
situation accurately. This requires having a true understanding of how the world works. It’s important to be free of emotional distress and to maintain your composure. Excess emotion clouds perception and can inhibit your ability to take action.
2. Take responsibility. Something powerful
happens when you choose to take responsibility for a situation: you have the power to change things. When you have power, you’ll feel less stress and worry.
3. Stay present. In times of turmoil, keep your
attention on your current task. Keep your mind in the present moment. Keep your mind on your work, rather than on the possible negative outcomes. To stay present when your mind tries to wander, focus on your breathing and your senses.
4. Accept and persevere. Creating opportunities
from obstacles requires will. When placed in a situation with multiple obstacles and little hope, do you continue or do you give up? The ability
to accept the situation makes intelligent action easier. Lacking acceptance, you’ll face too much emotional struggle to perceive accurately or to act intelligently.
5. Focus on solutions. Unsuccessful people are
masters at concentrating on their challenges and making them more intimidating than they really are. Keep your thoughts on the solutions.
6. Realize that becoming upset limits your
options. Fear and anxiety limit your ability to see all of your options. The most elegant, and often simple, solutions will elude you. You’re at your best when in a state of composure.
7. Enjoy the company of others. Spending
time with family and friends is another great way to rehabilitate your state of mind and truly experience joy. Remember, they love you unconditionally and can offer as much support as you need. Hang out with them more than normal; you’ll start to experience healing from all that positive energy around you.
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8. Hold firm to your faith. It’s very likely that
your faith is what has brought you through the obstacles and darkness thus far. Your faith in the Creator’s ability to sustain you should not be overlooked. If you believe the Creator has kept you going through the worst moments of your life, there’s no reason to think you’ll be alone through the rest of it!
9. Think with your mind, not your emotions.
Make a conscious effort to separate thinking and reasoning from feeling. Otherwise, you’re likely to start believing that nothing will ever work out. Apply reasoning to the circumstances which brought the obstacle into your life and use the same reasoning to get you to a brighter place.
Obstacles are a common part of life. The most successful people are able to overcome bigger obstacles than those that struggle with life. Obstacles can be viewed as stepping stones to greater levels of success. Obstacles are one of the best learning opportunities. Obstacles stretch your ability to contain your emotions, build focus and acceptance, and develop new skills.
You can control your thoughts and emotional response in every situation. Focus on maintaining your composure throughout the day. You’ll start to feel yourself overcoming obstacles in your life if you allow yourself to practice things that bring you joy. It’s not always going to be an easy road, but you’ll be able to travel it if you commit to maintaining your composure to help turn things around for you.
Minister Ginger London
is a well-respected and sought after Preacher, Teacher, Author, Christian Counselor, Speaker and Board Certified Life Coach. Her teaching, preaching and coaching has produced transformational changes in the lives of believers, entrepreneurs, and ministry leaders for the past 20 years. She is also the author of four manuals and a writing contributor of 8 Topical Articles and Biblical Profiles for the nationally acclaimed “Aspire” The New Women of Color Study Bible. Visit her at www.gingerlondon.com
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July 2016 | 19
Inspiring Quotes to Help You ...
. . . Overcome those Challenging Moments!
The greater the obstacle, the it because the only way to escape fear you. Always be the student. Once you more glory in overcoming it. is to trample it beneath your foot. find yourself to be the teacher, you’ve lost -Molière It is not in the still -Nadia Comaneci it. -Sandra Bullock calm of life, or the repose of When we least expect it, life sets It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that a pacific station, that great us a challenge to test our courage I stay with problems longer. -Albert characters are formed. The and willingness to change; at such Einstein To be tested is good. The habits of a vigorous mind are a moment, there is no point in challenged life may be the best formed in pretending therapist. -Gail Sheehy To remain contending that nothing indifferent to the challenges we face is with has happened indefensible. If the goal is noble, whether difficulties. or in saying or not it is realized within our lifetime -Abigail that we are not is largely irrelevant. What we must do Adams yet ready. The therefore is to strive and persevere and The brick challenge will never give up. -Dalai Lama If you are walls are not wait. Life facing a new challenge or being asked to there for does not look do something that you have never done a reason. back. -Paulo before don’t be afraid to step out. You The brick Coelho have more capability than you think you walls are There is a do but you will never see it unless you -Chinese proverb not there tendency at to keep us every important place a demand on yourself for more. -Joyce Meyer By cultivating gratitude out. The but difficult brick walls are there to give us crossroad to pretend that it’s not really you eventually expand your internal sense of what is possible, regardless of a chance to show how badly there. -Bill McKibben seeming obstacles and challenges you go we want something. Because Our very survival depends on our the brick walls are there to ability to stay awake, to adjust to new through. - Veronica Smith There are no great people in this world, stop the people who don’t ideas, to remain vigilant only great challenges which want it badly enough. They’re and to face the challenge ordinary people rise to meet. there to stop the other people. of change. -Martin -William Frederick Halsey, Jr. -Randy Pausch The key to life Luther King Jr. Life’s challenges are not is accepting challenges. Once I’ve learned that success supposed to paralyze you, someone stops doing this, he’s comes in a very prickly they’re supposed to help dead. -Bette Davis Being package. Whether you you discover who you are. challenged in life is inevitable, choose to accept it or -Bernice Johnson Reagon being defeated is optional. not is up to you. It’s If you compared your what you choose to do -Roger Crawford Life is troubles, or challenges, with it, the people you -Ray Davis either a daring adventure with those of others, you would choose to surround or nothing at all. -Helen yourself with. Always surely find that there are those whose troubles make Keller I don’t run away choose people that are better than yours look like minor inconveniences. from a challenge because I am you. Always choose people that Catherine Pulsifer afraid. Instead, I run towards challenge you and are smarter than
The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials.
A challenge only becomes an obstacle when you bow to it.
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July 2016 | 20
We all have our challenges. Don’t let yours dim your light. - Angie Romero
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