Free | December 2013
Letter from the Editor
December .... a month that marks the end of one year with the promise of a bigger, brighter and better new year to come. I’ve always imagined it like an imaginary countdown, where we get ready to start dreaming of the next 365 days to come. For me, personally, 2013 brought me much change, excitement, trials and challenges along with blessings, miracles and new friendships. New adventures to be discovered, goals to be revised and dreams to be made manifest. As I sit here tonight writing this, I look back at the last couple of issues and smile because Happier Healthier Women has been born in the mist of all of this, and for that I feel truly blessed. Joyful to be able to bring to you amazing experts in topics that mean so much to us all. At peace with my heart because my soul feels aligned with its purpose. And, excited at the amazing impact I have been told the magazine is already making. It’s magic in all its essence ... and what a wonderful season to realize this! With the end of this year just a couple of weeks away, I can only wonder what 2014 will bring to each of our lives. Yet, at the same time I have a deep sense of knowing within my heart that many blessings are coming for all of us. May you and your loved ones have a wonderful holiday season filled with tons of love, laughter and beautiful memories! From my heart to yours,
A Special Thank You &Dedication
I have wonderful people that have supported me in all I do, and at times have believed in me even more than I ever did for myself. Not only have they walked with me hand-in-hand through the good, but have lifted me in even my darkest days when I have felt lost and confused. Encouraged me to move forward regardless of what was happening. They’ve taught me new ways to see the world, to love, and to be my own light. Just who am I speaking of? First and foremost - my family. I love you guys... each and every one of you! Thank you for all your support and encouragement. Secondly, (along with a very special dedication) is to someone who has shown me a great deal of support, love and protection even from far. A fun loving soul that has helped me in the last couple of months more than I can ever repay. One who offers me calm when I call distressed, and even plays along with my frequent creative silliness. Someone who has been instrumental in the creation of this magazine from its very beginning. Pablo, the words “thank you” are not enough to convey the gratitude I feel, but they are the only words I can say on paper right now . . . so from the depths of my heart, “Thank You!!” for your friendship, your openess and your support!
Mind - Body - Spirit
5
Its The Season of Love
Money
9
Holiday Happiness or Holiday Madness
by Angie Romero
by Shagufta Khatri
12 A Gift to Myself
by Kimberly Eldredge
Nutrition
Table of Contents
15 Are Gluten-Free Foods Healthier? by Varouj Kachichian
25 Beat the Holiday Blues by Michelle Lee
Parenting
19 Legacy of Love: The Top 5 Ways to Give a Legacy of Love This Holiday Season by Wendy Witt
Bonus Sections 4
A Special Thank You and Dedication
24 Kidz Corner - The Shades by Valeria Salazar
18 Recipe: Oven Roasted Vegetables with Ginger and Turmeric by Varouj Kachichian
Its The
Season
of Love By ANGIE ROMERO
Regardless of your religious / spiritual belief or your traditions for this time of year . . . I strongly believe that there is something in the air that carries a special kind of magic, of blessings and a spirit of Divinity which embraces all of us.
And, the following paragraph from A Course in Miracles has such profoundness for me during this special time of the year because of that. “Let no despair darken the joy of Christmas, for the time of Christ is meaningless apart from joy. Let us join in celebrating peace by demanding no sacrifice of anyone, for so you offer me the love I offer you. What can be more joyous than to perceive we are deprived nothing? Such is the message of the time of Christ, which I give you that you may give it and return it to the Father, Who gave it to me. For in the time of Christ communication is restored, and He joins in the celebration of His Son’s creation.” ACIM T-15. XI.8
I think its important to start by defining the word “Christ” before we go any further. The word christ comes from the greek word Christós meaning “anointed” while in the translation of Hebrew means the Messiah. Many relate the word only to Jesus the Christ, and whether you believe in Jesus or not .... the message offered in the paragraph is universal.
Now, let me break down the paragraph for us. “Let no despair darken the joy of Christmas, for the time of Christ is meaningless apart from joy.” Somewhere throughout our history, the holidays have been intertwined with stress, shopping, and even heartbreak for many. We have allowed our fears and worries overshadow the true symbol of the season ... joy! The time of Christ (Christmas) is a sign of the birth of our own Divinity and soul. It is a reawakening of our faith in something bigger than our worries (than our own ego minds). It is meant as a time for sharing joy, warmth and love with everyone around us. “Let us join in celebrating peace by demanding no sacrifice of anyone, for so you offer me the love I offer you.” If I were to put you on the spot and ask you what demand of sacrifice you place on someone ... what would you say? I’m sure 90% of us might quickly answer “No, nothing.” Yet, I challenge you with the following quote I found from Oren Arnold speaking of Christmas gift suggestions: To your enemy, forgiveness. To an opponent, tolerance. To a friend, your heart. To a customer, service. To all, charity. To every child, a good example. To yourself, respect.
It made me think..... if I apply the lessons the A Course in Miracles teaches then the demand of sacrifice I place on my “enemy” is to not offer forgiveness; to a “friend” is to not offer my heart; to myself is to not give myself respect; etc.
Yet ... in order to join in the celebration of peace all we need to do is to offer the Love that is offered to us by God (the Divine / Universe). Love is what everything else isn’t. Love isn’t worry, stress or sadness. Love is happiness, warmth and smiles. Sure, we all have people in our life that (as per our ego) have done us wrong. But, this paragraph teaches us that its the season to offer forgiveness, remove that grudge from your own heart and enter the joy of peace. That is the one present that cannot be bought in stores or online. To love one another and celebrate together in peace is what this season is about. “What can be more joyous than to perceive we are deprived nothing? Such is the message of the time of Christ, which I give you that you may give it and return it to the Father, Who gave it to me.” As a parent, do you purposefully deprive your child of something you can actually give? Or do you do whatever it takes to give them what they want? If we are to see God as our Father ... can we really believe that he would purposefully deprive us of anything? That being the Creator and all, has full access and power to (literally) move mountains, create heaven and earth, millions of stars and galaxies. All He has to offer us is ... well, everything!
This is the season to remember that. But we first have to understand that the only thing that really matters in the world (again) is Love. However, our ego, society and the million of advertisers are trying to convince us day-in and day-out that we need more... deserve more. And, in reality, we are deprived nothing for we have the Unconditional Love of our own Father - and nothing can beat that. Because nothing can surpass that Love of a Father to his children.
“For in the time of Christ communication is restored, and He joins in the celebration of His Son’s creation.” Sit with that thought for a minute, and let your Soul feel that. Allow your Soul to connect with that Love and just breathe. Maybe my words are different than you would use, and that’s ok. For the message isn’t mine, but of Christ, of our Father and of the season. For Unconditional Love can’t be captured in all its essence in words (for language is a product of our mind, not emotion). But the feeling, .... awwww.... That feeling is the Love that we all carry within, for we are all children of that Love.
Angie Romero is a Life and Wellness
Coach for Women, a Holistic Practitioner, Editor/Publisher of HappierHealthierWomen. com, and Recipient of VIP Woman of the Year by The National Association of Women for 2013 for her service to women worldwide to live Happier and Healthier in all areas of their life. For more information on courses, seminars and transformational packages, visit www.AngieRomero.com
Holiday
Happiindaeyss or Hol Madness
Holidays were meant to be a time of Rest & Recreation with your family, loved ones and friends. Then why are we, especially women, freaking out days and months ahead. Honestly, even the thought of exploring the possible reasons and causes is intimidating for me, but before we go down that highway, let’s take a stroll down Holiday Ave and what all is in store for us.
By SHAGUFTA KHATRI Once upon a time, Holiday Ave was filled with: - Lots of free time to spend as you wanted; - Simple gifts that you treasured and remembered till today; - Lazy afternoons, cozy evenings, lots of stories and shared moments at kitchen / dining table or by the fireplace; - Favorite recipes and traditional foods; - Looking forward to meeting loved ones and catching up with their life events. I believe you get the picture, and it does not look stressful.
When did this change…. more important…Why did this all change? Is it fair to blame the society when we are an active part of it? Did we bite more than we can chew? Can this be changed and turned around?
My take on this is that there is one thing at the bottom of all this… FEAR. Fear in different forms and at different levels. Let us see how the fear shows up its ugly head during the holidays, and I feel that is the reason for the stress during the holidays. - Fear that we do not have enough time, so we try to do a lot of things at same time. That leaves little or no time for spontaneous family fun and activities. - A jam packed agenda, for fear that the children of this age not get “bored”, so no time for conversations and lazy afternoons. - Fear that we may not seem successful, so all the overspending on gifts and trying to out do each other. When did it become a race to impress? You can choose to not be a part of this popularity race! Your friends and relatives can choose to love you and be part of your life regardless of the cost of the gift. - Fear of not being adequate, so we over do, over promise, take on so much more than we can handle. - Big menus, over ambitious recipes, complicated ingredients, …what happened to those simple stews and pot roasts? Afraid to ask for help and ask family to contribute their time and effort. Especially when you have people with “food preferences”. It used to be vegetarian or nonvegetarian or vegan at the most. Now a days, I have to google people’s food preferences, cannot seem to keep up with all the variations out there. Trying to fit in everybody and everything. Fear of not being in control…this is big one…so we try to do it all by ourselves. Fear of rejection, so not being able to say no, when your
On a side note-as a money coach I insist that you squirrel away money, a little bit each month, so you are able to buy gifts without any stress and stay in your budget, please. A little bit of pre-planning will go a long way. No last minute rush to buy gifts for everyone on your list, keep an eye out for sales and bargains ahead of time. It is not like the holidays are a surprise expense!!
plate is already so full. Fear of being judged, of not being perfect. Understand that we are enough the way we are, we have to prove nothing to no one. Fear of being judged and scrutinized, especially when you have had a not so good year. So you decide to spend the holidays alone. Fear of not having enough, so not wanting to share.
Fear of meeting some of those toxic relatives, who have been unwelcome guests at your table year after year. Who do nothing but criticize and torment you or your family member. Cut them out. Do not be afraid to not invite them this holiday. They can clean up their act and be respectful of your home and you or they can stay away. - Sharing and giving too much of yourself, to the point of neglecting yourself. This must STOP. It can STOP when You want it to STOP. The holidays are a good time to restart, on a fresh note. Release and let go of all that does not serve a deeper purpose in your life or is not aligned to your true self. So that next year is filled with only what You want. Embrace who you are. Like I said earlier, you have nothing to prove to anyone. Does that mean there will be no fear in your life? No, but make room for the good kind of fear. Fear of God. Fear of Karma. Fear that we will die without living our purpose. Fear that we have not made a positive contribution to this world. Fear that we did not leave this world a better place, than we found it. Fear that we did not love enough.
6 Quick reminders to help you survive the holidays: 1. Try not spend money you do not have, to buy things you do not want, to impress people you do not even like. 2. Love yourself and be good to yourself first. You cannot give what you do not have. It is okay to say “NO”. No is a complete sentence in itself and you do not have to add an explanation to it. 3. Being busy is not an acceptable excuse to not be with your family. Make time. 4. Do not over think and over plan. Stop trying to control everything. Be spontaneous and enjoy life. 5. Moderation is the key to balance. When it comes to food and drinks, do not over indulge. 6. Stop trying to be perfect. Give yourself permission to be human. Let everyone embrace you the way you are. Do not be afraid to shine your true light! You are God’s perfect creation. Let no one take that away from You.
Shagufta Khatri is a Mentor/
Coach to Entrepreneurs who struggle with Consistent Cash-flow and want to “Keep more of the Money they Make and Make as much Money as they Want.” She works with clients in 3 strategic areas that impact their business’s bottom-line achieving a 40% increase in their net profits, within 3 months of taking her 5 week signature program “Make your Biz Your A.T.M”. If you like this article, you will also enjoy my weekly money tips. I am rebranding my website and once ready, you will get an update on the FB page about your free gift, so do remember to hit “LIKE” http://Facebook.com/ShitThatMatters
Happy Holidays to each and every one of You.
May the coming days be filled with Love, Laughter, Good Health, Prosperity & Peace
A Gift
To Myself By KIMBERLY ELDREDGE
I remember the anticipation the most; I had spent weeks working on the project and I was 99.9% sure that the fruit of my labors was waiting for me in my PO Box. I leaned down to open my box; its only three rows up from the bottom. I took a deep breath and turned the key.
It was waiting for me. A non-descriptive brown cardboard package, deceptively lightweight. My mom was waiting for me in the truck; we were just about to head to town for a grocery shopping trip. Do I open it here, in the Post Office, alone, or wait until I was in the truck, with an audience? I was sure I was going to cry. That decided it for me; if I was going to cry I wanted it to be with only my mom watching and not the whole of a small town Post Office. I didn’t bother to pick up the mail in the four other PO boxes I checked daily but walked quickly out into the late summer sunshine and back to the truck. My hands were trembling as I pulled back the cardboard zipper. That surprised me. It wasn’t the first time, exactly. I had been here before, almost. The package opened in my lap. I was glad I was sitting down. When I was in college, I decided that I should treat my writing like a business. I had a very
small portfolio of work – mostly poems since my major was Creative Writing but my emphasis was poetry. Still, I knew that I had enough work to start sending out submissions and begin collecting rejection letters. One of the first rules of submission is to carefully study the magazine or journal you’re submitting to. Then, you submit a piece (or write a piece) that meets the tone, style, and subject matter of where you want to be published. You could buy a copy of most literary journals for $20. And then submit three poems, no longer than a page, for another $20. Every Tuesday and Thursday, I had a three hour break between classes. I designated this time as Submission Time. Tuesdays I found places to submit, Thursdays I stuffed envelopes with poems. And checks. I realized quickly that it added up. Fast. So I skipped the step that said study the publication and just started submitting to every contest, call for submission, and open reading period I could find. One afternoon I was in the hallway of the
English building and I saw a flier for a literary journal that was specifically for undergrads. More specifically, you had to be 1. an honors student; 2. attending a college with an honors program; and 3. the college’s honors program had to be in a certain nation-wide network. Amazingly, I met all the qualifications. I’d never heard of the journal but decided I’d give it a go. I popped a poem in an envelope and sent it off. Weeks later, I got an answer: my very first publication for a poem called “Ode to a Tuna Fish Sandwich.” My dad sent flowers; my whole family got copies of the journal for Christmas. I was a published author – one little poem among thirty other undergrads who had also been published in that year’s edition. How could this moment in my truck be so different than back in college with my first ever publication? Why was I shaking? Wasn’t this old hat? After all, I’d been published in journals, anthologies, trade publications, and travel magazines. But it was different. Very different.
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In my hands I held my book. MY book. With my name on the cover in yellow print in my favorite font that I called the Butter-Bear font even though the real name is butterbrotpapier. I handed it to my mom. She opened it and saw the simple, two word dedication: For mom. We both cried, sitting in the truck, flipping through the pages, admiring the word PROOF across the last page. I knew I still had work to do: the title on the cover wasn’t centered, there was a typo in the first sentence of chapter three. I needed to carefully go over every word and scan for typos, mistakes, bad grammar, and clunky sentences. I was surprised to realize that my self-published book didn’t feel at all like a copout or like a lesser-quality book than any other book I’d been published in before. I was stunned to realize how REAL it felt. To be a published author with a solo book. To know I had done it, finally. There was the dream of being a published author that I never realized hadn’t been completely fulfilled as a one-among-many author. And yes, I gave out copies of my book for Christmas to my parents and grandparents and aunts. Every time I publish a new book and hold it in my hands for the first time I get the same feeling – the whoosh in my stomach, my hands tremble, and I cry to hold the book in my hands with my name on the cover.
But the real gift was the one I gave myself when I realized my dream in publishing the book in the first place.
If I could, I’d bottle this feeling and serve it in little glasses to anyone who has ever wanted to publish a book. Just a little taste, a sample in a tiny crystal sherry glass. Just enough to feel the magic of having the book published; the gift to yourself. Then I’d help you realize the publishing dream. And take a photo of your face when you pull back the cardboard zipper and see your book sitting there with your name on the cover.
Kimberly Eldredge is an author,
illustrator, and entrepreneur. Her business, On The Beach Publishing, helps authors and entrepreneurs publish their book. She offers assisted selfpublishing options as well DIY solutions. Find out more at http://OnTheBeachPublishing.com
Would going gluten free solve your problems? Make you lose the unwanted inches?
Are GlutenFree Foods Healthier? By VAROUJ KACHICHIAN
I’m sure you have heard many of your friends and family members or even you who started feeling better and losing pounds after going gluten free. I know I have lost over 20 pounds after going gluten free and that’s without “dieting” or being deprived from tasty foods. I know many who lowered their blood sugar levels, even lowered their cholesterol on a gluten free diet. A couple days ago, a friend of mine who has a history of high cholesterol and a host of other health challenges, admitted that his doctor was wondering what he did to lower his cholesterol. He had simply decreasing the amount of bread he eats. His doctor told him to “keep it up,” yet he did not even think for a second to test him for gluten sensitivity. Makes me wonder, but that’s another topic.
Isn’t it the popular belief that fats, like butter and animal products, are responsible for the increase of cholesterol? Isn’t it the sugar that affects insulin levels, and therefore, making people diabetics?
So, why is it that so many lose inches and many actually gain more weight when they go gluten-free? The answer lies in the actual diet! Substituting gluten foods with gluten free counterparts does not make it a healthier diet! You see, gluten free baked goods contain just as many carbohydrates as the traditional non gluten counterparts do, which ultimately convert into sugar. And that will affect your body’s ability to function properly. It will put your liver on overload. Just as badly, it will increase insulin production just as much, and you will feel no difference in your health. Maybe less aches and pains caused by gluten consumption, provided you followed a truly 100% gluten free diet, without cheating! And eliminate all sources of gluten, including and not limited to shampoos, make-up and any possibility of cross contamination. Otherwise, you will feel that you didn’t benefit from doing the gluten-free, and you would be right, because you didn’t do it right! I know I’ve said this before, but, another piece of the puzzle is to take proper steps to repair damage caused by gluten. The right supplements, vitamins, minerals and enzymes are critical. So, as you gather around the holiday table with family and loved ones, make a conscious decision, and choose carefully what you add to your plate. It is always uncomfortable to explain to everyone about your dietary needs, but ultimately, it’s your body!
1 .
3
.
Choose naturally colorful vegetables and dark greens as the center of your plate, a good size of protein is essential, and limit the amount of carbohydrates you consume.
You really don’t have to eat until you can’t breathe anymore! Stop eating before you are full. In fact, studies show that eating 20% less is a good practice to maintain a healthier lifestyle.
2 .
Opt for fresh fruits rather than processed baked foods when possible. I know this may sound like I’m asking you to do the impossible, especially during the holiday season. Trust me, once you consciously choose the foods you eat, and start noticing the difference in the way you feel, it will be easy to say no to a piece of cake.
4 .
And if you must indulge, choose gluten-free and eat fresh ingredients, rather than canned or highly processed GMO stuff.
You really don’t have to eat until you can’t breathe anymore! Stop eating before you are full. In fact, studies show that eating 20% less is a good practice to maintain a healthier lifestyle. And if you must indulge, choose gluten-free and eat fresh ingredients, rather than canned or highly processed GMO stuff. For additional tips on how to survive the holidays, refer back to last month’s issue. Ok, I feel like I’m sounding more like a doctor than a Chef, so back to my kitchen I go. Here is a great recipe that my clients love. It is super easy, simple, and delicious. A crowd pleaser, even kids love it too. It is good for you. It is loaded with detoxifying vegetables and healing spices. And it does not taste like medicine! :) I want to wish you a Merry Christmas and a happy, safe, and healthy holiday season. And as always, I’d like to hear your thoughts and comments, you can email me at chefv@culinarycreator.com
Chef Varouj Kachichian (chefV)
has more than 20 years of culinary experience and is a certified gluten practitioner. His mission is to help gluten sensitive individuals transition and live a gluten free lifestyle, inspire them to cook and eat healthy and delicious gluten-free meals in 30 minutes or less, so they have more energy, eliminate toxins and manage their weight, all without feeling deprived.
chefV’s
Oven Roasted Vegetables with Ginger and Turmeric Serves 6-8
1 Whole cauliflower 1 Whole broccoli 15-20 Brussels sprouts cut in half (optional) 1 Large white, yellow or red onion, cut into thick slices 2 Red peppers, deveined and seeded, cut into 1” squares 1- 2” piece Ginger, sliced 6 cloves Garlic, smashed Salt and pepper to taste 1/2 cup extra virgin olive oil 2 tablespoons Turmeric 1 teaspoon Cayenne (optional) ½ cup pumpkin, or sunflower seeds Step 1 Preheat the oven to 450F. Step 2 Cut vegetables as noted above. Cut broccoli and cauliflower into florets and cut the stems into ½ inch chunks. Step 3 In a bowl, toss all vegetables with the olive oil and the spices. Step 4 Spread on a sheet pan or a baking dish in one layer. Step 5 Bake for 15-20 minutes; make sure vegetables are still firm and slightly browned around the edges.
Legacy of Love
The Top 5 Ways to Give a Legacy of Love This Holiday Season
By WENDY WITT
As a mom to three, I’ve spent big bucks at Game Stop, Abercrombie and Fitch, and Amazon.com over the years. As my credit cards wail in pain, I notice that on Christmas morning, Natasha, Kira, and Drew love having gifts to open, but then those gifts immediately get blended among all their other stuff they own. Even new gifts don’t continue to hold much joy or interest and they certainly don’t create lasting memories. This year when my daughter, Kira, was turning 16, I decided to implement something I’ve learned from my legal clients over the last 15 years. I choose to give her an experience for her birthday, instead of stuff.
Loved Ones Value Experiences Over Stuff Admittedly, the celebration of Kira’s 16th year was a splurge, but it is something she will remember forever and has shaped her as a human being. She and I spent three weeks in New York City – and my husband, Joe, and son, Drew, joined us for the third week. Kira is now comfortable riding the subway alone, is considering attending college at NYU, and knows the Metropolitan Museum of Modern Art is not a good fit for her. As I feel her slipping into a world, which doesn’t include me every day, I know there will never be a time when she doesn’t remember that trip. Even a thousand Abercrombie and Fitch sweaters can’t compare. Most important to me is that Kira learned to think BIG and do things outside her comfort zone in NYC. She saw beyond her everyday life and when she makes choices in the future, she’ll have a much better idea of her real life options – not just the options presented in our everyday suburban life. That experience was her gift.
How Can You Create an Experience for Your Loved One? Fortunately, giving experiences to loved ones doesn’t always have to cost a lot of money. In fact, here are 5 budget minded ways you can create cherished memories for your loved ones this holiday season. The financial costs are minimal and you’re likely to find something, which is a good fit for you. 1. Create a New Holiday Tradition Build memories by creating a new holiday tradition or reviving an old one. When I was growing up, my parents were extremely budget conscious, and one of our favorite holiday traditions was to drive around town and look at everyone’s Christmas lights. Thirty years later, to continue that tradition with my own family, we drive through a magical light display at a local park that had once been a beautiful estate. We’ve done that annually for years for a cost of $12 per carload. Other fun and inexpensive traditions include getting new pajamas the night before Christmas, banging pots and pans at midnight on New Year’s Eve, and opening one present in the middle of the night just before Christmas, Kwanzah, or Hanukkah starts. Create your own tradition. Many traditions simply take something simple and make a big deal out of it – be sure to take photos to seal the memories.
2. Take Photos and Document Experiences If your children are anything like mine, they tend to remember when I flub up instead of when I’m brilliant and nurturing. They all seem well adjusted and know they’re loved, so the good is seeping in, but it would be nice if they consciously remembered all that good stuff. For example, my Kira recently noticed a neighborhood mom walking back from the bus stop and asked if I used to go to the bus stop with she and Drew. Are you kidding me?! I went to the bus stop twice a day for something like six years. Okay, sometimes it was the nanny or their father at the bus stop, but still… And, so, at that moment of mommy incredulous dismay, I re-vowed to be ever more diligent at documenting every day life. Here’s one thing I’m doing right to hold as evidence of my fabulous motherdom. I have created a slew of Shutterfly.com books for my son, Drew. He’s 14 and finds them somewhat interesting, but someday he’ll get it and treasure them. Every once in awhile, I find him looking through the books and I can tell he feels happy. He can see he’s loved and although we don’t have a big family or family nearby, he is a part of something bigger. That seems to give him comfort. I’ve chosen the use the 8 x 8 hardcover books – and usually get the book for just the cost of shipping and handling because Shutterfly regularly sends coupons for free books (and other stuff). Sign up for their emails; it’s worth the inbox intrusion. You can upload your own photos and document experiences in the text. Some of Drew’s books are entitled Mr. Witt Goes to NYC, Mr. Witt Goes to Washington DC, Gramps Loves Mr. Witt, and Mr. Witt’s Family.
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3. Get in the Photos or Be Lost About 10 years ago, I heard famed comedienne, Rosie O’Donnell, lament that she didn’t even have one photograph of she and her mother together – not one. Her mom had died when Rosie was just 10 years old. As moms, we’re typically behind the camera, not in front of it for a myriad of reasons. Usually that number one reason is that we think we don’t look good enough – we need to lose weight, we don’t have make-up on, we’re not wearing our contacts – whatever. I’ll be blunt here – get over it. Your child, friends, and family love you as you are and you need to be with your loved ones in photographs. It’s about being a family – being together – creating memories – and documenting those memories. If you think you’re children will remember, you’re mistaken. You not being in photos will leave a hole in your children’s memories and future. 4. Write Love Letters I first became an estate planning attorney because I wanted to protect my own children. At the time, it was eight years after law school and I hadn’t ever practiced. The law didn’t excite me because I couldn’t see how my practicing law would help anyone. My zillion internships and summer jobs were uninspiring to say the least. At 5 months pregnant with Drew (my third), I read a book that described the benefits of Revocable Living Trusts and estate planning. I became desperate to protect my children from an evil (and mentally unstable) relative. In addition, I knew that if something happened to me, my very kind – yet naïve – husband, might fall prey to some gold digger who would steal my children’s inheritance and treat them poorly. One of the first things I learned to do upon becoming an estate planning attorney was to write a love letter to each of my children. I couldn’t write those letters at first because my emotions were so high. Admittedly, I cried and my heart ached at the thought of anyone, other than me, raising my children. Even though my little ones would forget me, I gave up. But after two weeks, I came back to the computer and wrote those letters. It became more important for my children to have tangible documentation of my love for them than for me to succumb to my own discomfort. Maybe this is where I got the original idea. My husband’s own father died suddenly just as Joe turned 21. They found scraps of paper (literally, scraps of paper) in his father’s wallet and scrawled on the paper were the words, “Joey, I’m proud of you” and other words like that. To this day, 25 years later, my Joe still has those scraps of paper and I find him looking at them from time to time when he’s missing his dad.
5. Journal Your Joys Though scraps of paper work just as well, I use a journal to record examples of when my children make me particularly happy. Two are teenagers are now, so I don’t write in it every day… I found discounted journals at a bookstore, which was going out of business, and have a journal for each child. Jokes about moody teenagers aside, I don’t write in it every day, but I do keep it within sight and, from time to time, jot down the date and a few lines about a joke Drew told, an outfit Kira helped me put together, or some kind of support Natasha provided. My joy journal is much like a gratitude journal in that it helps me (and someday will help my children) see the good in all and praise it. Someday, when they all find out I’ve been recording my joys, they’ll realize, even if just a bit, how much I’ve actually loved them all along.
Wendy Witt
(The Mama Bear Attorney)
has been a mama for 19 years and has been helping moms protect their cubs with good estate planning for 14 years. If you’re a Mama Bear and you want to protect your cubs and feel less anxious, you are invited to download FREE Mama Bear Guides at www.LawAha.com
To bottom line it (as all good attorneys do) I’m not suggesting you to avoid Game Stop, Abercrombie and Fitch, and Amazon.com this holiday season. I am suggesting you add whichever legacy of love you resonate with. Happy Holidays!
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rent A Diffe View Point of
The Shades As soon as Rudolph’s celebration of him leading Santa’s sleigh was over he put on some shades. Then he went off on the sleigh himself, sitting as if HE were Santa. After an hour or two, he began to make a speech, back at the North Pole saying, “I’m the coolest reindeer of them all. And Santa is the jolliest, happiest, merriest person I’ve ever seen. He has brought presents to all, so give him a round of applause.”
As Rudolph said this, Santa began to feel merry as usual, and
with a wink from Rudolph Santa knew that Rudolph stuck up for him.
help. r u o y r o f g skin Valeria is a you all
Valeria Salazar is nine-years-old and is in fourth grade. In her spare time she enjoys to sing and dance.
essage to m a d n e s d ke to t you to sen n a “I would li w I . y a this holid an to your c u o y s because of a s d rismas canned foo h y C n is a h m t s y a it r in closest cha r 2013.” o t e k r a m r e p u s inspir e is such an h S t: n e m m Her! :) Editors Co I Just Love
ation!
Ways To Be Of Good Cheer Holiday times are supposed to be full of joy and laughter, unfortunately, many people experience unhappiness and even sadness during these times. The good news is that by engaging in a few mood boosting activities, spirits can be uplifted.
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Beat The Holiday Blues
Eat healthy - While it is so tempting to load up on Christmas By MICHELLE LEE cookies, mouth-watering pies, and grandma’s delicious fudge, consuming these goodies at the expense of other more healthy alternatives can lead to lack of energy and vitality. Don’t forget to include your fruits and veggies throughout the day; Stay hydrated by drinking enough water usually six to eight glasses it what to aim for; Try to consume a variety of foods, including carbohydrates, and protein; Watch your food portions, meaning, you can have your cake and eat it too, just don’t eat the whole cake at one time. Stay physically active - Instead of just sitting around doing nothing, get back into life by doing the things that bring you joy whatever they are; going for a walk, engaging in early spring cleaning, volunteering your time. Stay mentally alert - Studies show that once people graduate from school, have a tendency to read less. Reading the newspaper or your favorite magazine, or other material keeps your mind occupied and can be lots of fun. Turn on the lights - This can be an instant mood booster. Give thanks - Remember the reason for the season. When you are truly thankful for all that you already
Michelle Lee, Life Coach BS, MA, Life Coach,
Certified with Coach Training Alliance, M.Ed-Health Promotion. Coaching individuals to reduce stress, create a better work/life balance and shed unwanted pounds without having to diet, so they can start relishing their life now.