Managing Hearing Loss

Hearing Loss Is a Practice, Not

a Perfect By Shari Eberts

I am almost as passionate about yoga as I am about hearing loss advocacy. I try to practice yoga every day but during COVID-19 when I could not visit the yoga studio, conditions were not ideal. I created a dedicated space for my yoga practice at home, but it is also the walkway out to the backyard. When temperatures dropped I brought in space heaters to simulate the warm temperatures of my studio, but they can only do so much.

“It’s a practice, not a perfect,” my yoga teacher reminds us as we struggle with the frustrations of taking class from home. “Optimize the conditions and do the best you can in the moment. Then try again tomorrow.” Good advice for practicing yoga, and also for living with hearing loss.

Wouldn’t it be nice to approach each listening challenge with this same attitude— open-minded, without expectations, but all the while actively working to optimize the circumstances to help you hear your best? This outlook can be the difference between anger or determination, isolation or engagement, and frustration or peace in living with hearing loss, tinnitus, or both.

It is not an easy task. These thoughts may go through our minds each time we hit a challenging listening situation.

“My hearing will never be perfect.”

“Hearing aids help, but they don’t work like glasses, restoring hearing back to ‘normal.’”

Opposite page: Shari Eberts (shown at left with her family) practices yoga in the Grand Canyon.

“It’s hard to hear people speak when there is background noise.”

“Why can’t people use communication best practices like getting my attention before speaking to me?”

“How will I ever hear anyone when they’re wearing a mask?”

It is easy to get discouraged and want to give up, but we cannot. Communication is too important to our physical and mental health; it’s what keeps us connected to others and to the world. If we can change our focus to one of action—optimizing the situation—rather than lamenting poor listening conditions, we are more likely to achieve our real objective: effective and enjoyable communication.

A can-do attitude is important, but so is expertise—and to build this takes effort. Years ago when my son was in preschool, his teacher used to say, “Practice builds confidence.” She was talking about rehearsing for the class recital at the end of the year, but it is true for any difficult task.

“Don’t you mean practice makes perfect?” I asked when my son repeated the phrase to me. “No, confidence,” he said.

Wise words and an important life lesson. By changing the goal from how well the kids performed to how they felt while doing it, my son’s teacher encouraged the children to focus on behaviors that lead to success. Kudos to this teacher for inspiring her students to embrace rehearsal time. Practicing built both confidence and expertise so the children could perform at an optimal level without fear of failure. Perfection was never even a consideration.

These same philosophies can be applied to living with hearing loss. It will always be challenging picking up a prescription at the pharmacy when people are wearing face masks. We know it will be hard to follow a Zoom meeting without captions or, as socializing slowly returns, to go out to a loud restaurant or party.

But when we focus on actions to improve the situation and practice the skills we need to do this, we will feel more confident in the moment and execute the workarounds more effectively.

For example, at the pharmacy, you can use a speech-to-text-app to provide captioning support for what you hear from behind the masks. Practice with a family member at home first so you will be more adept in the moment. Same goes for the Zoom meetings or any other listening challenge.

Plan your action strategy, practice it at home, and begin to execute with more confidence and ease in the moment. And don’t forget to say namaste. Share your story: Tell us your communication strategies at editor@hhf.org.

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Shari Eberts serves on the Board of Trustees of the Hearing Loss Association of America and is a past chair of HHF’s Board of Directors. This originally appeared on her blog, livingwithhearingloss.com.