Dealing with an adult child who refuses to communicate with you

Dealing with an adult child who refuses to communicate with you can be a challenging and emotionally distressing situation. It’s important to approach the matter with care and sensitivity. Here are some pieces of advice for handling this situation:

1. Give them space: If your adult child is not willing to speak with you in detail, it may be helpful to give them some space and time to process their feelings. Avoid pushing them to open up before they are ready.

2. Self-refection: Take some time to refect on your own behaviour and actions that may have contributed to the strained relationship. Being open to selfimprovement can help rebuild trust.

3. Respect their boundaries: Everyone has their own comfort zones and boundaries when it comes to communication. Respect your child’s need for personal space and boundaries, even if it means limited interaction.

4. Express your desire to communicate: Let your adult child know that you value their thoughts and feelings, and you are open to listening whenever they are ready to talk. Ensure that your communication is non-confrontational and non-judgmental.

5. Seek professional help: If communication diffculties persist, consider involving a family therapist or counsellor to facilitate conversations and address any underlying issues within the family dynamic.

6. Send written messages: Sometimes, written communication can be less intimidating than face-to-face conversations. Consider sending a heartfelt letter or email expressing your love and willingness to work on the relationship.

7. Find common ground: Try to identify shared interests or activities that you can engage in together. This can help rebuild connections and provide opportunities for communication in a less stressful environment.

8. Practice active listening: When your adult child does decide to speak, make sure you are an active listener. This means giving them your full attention, showing empathy, and refraining from offering unsolicited advice or criticism.

9. Patience is key:

Rebuilding trust and repairing a strained relationship takes time. Be patient and understanding of your adult child’s process of healing and willingness to communicate.

10. Focus on your own well-being: Take care of your own physical and emotional wellbeing. Seek support from friends, family, or a therapist to help you cope with the challenges of a strained relationship. It’s important to remember that every situation is unique, and there are no one-size-ftsall solutions. Keep the lines of communication open, be patient, and be willing to work towards a healthier, more communicative relationship with your adult child, but also be prepared for the possibility that they may need more time to come around.

Grape Expectations by Max Crus

Max Crus is a Clarence Valley-based wine writer and Grape Expectations is now in its 26th year of publication. Find out more about Max or sign up for his weekly reviews and musings by visiting maxcrus.com.au