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PAWS 21/1/2011

VAMPIRE WEEKEND PLAYS ALEXANDRA PALACE

BEING PRO BROWNE A CONSERVATIVE VIEW

WORKING 9 TO 5 WOMEN IN THE WORKPLACE

PAWS - est. 2010 -

PAWS Magazine is the Biannual Magazine published by The Lion Newspaper and the HSU.

EDITORIAL

Edited, Designed & Created By Alex Hackett Gala Jackson-Coombs

FOR ADVERTISING ENQUIRIES, PLEASE CONTACT : advertising@theheythroplion.co.uk

The Next Issue of The Lion is released 2/2/2011

WRITERS THIS ISSUE: Edward Cain J.T. White Josh Ferguson Mollie Puttock Mark Bevan John Arthur Craven Ord Sartaj Singh Almaz Messenger

Hello and welcome to the very first edition of paws magazine! We hope you have all recovered from your drunken Christmas merriment enough to give it a quick read.

It’s been a long time coming but we’ve finally managed to find somewhere to print a limited run. There’s some great stuff in this issue, from the latest music reviews, Christmas ball photos as well as some great comment. Consider it a very belated Christmas gift from The Lion team. Our intention is to release Paws twice a year (one at the beginning of lent term and one at the end of summer term) as an extra limited edition supplement to The Lion fortnightly paper. The Lion will be back in all its glory in a week’s time with some new editions and some exciting exclusives. The first podcasts from The Lion Editorial Board will be up, to download for free from the website. If you are interested in taking part, please email podcast@theheythroplion. co.uk with your name and how you want to be involved. We are also currently in the process of organising a massive Lion event called LionLive, in which contributors prepare work specially, live debates will be held, some Heythrop musicians will play, and possibly some famous and renowned speakers will entertain you. From all of us here at The Lion, we hope you had a great Christmas and an even better new year

Many Thanks,

2 PAWS January 2011

Alex and Gala Editors of Paws

CONTENTS 4 5 6 8

SPOTTED CHRISTMAS BALL PHOTOS FIGHTING THE DELUGE WOMEN IN THE WORKPLACE

9 I VOTED FOR UNCERTAINTY 10 RSC REVIEWS 12 THE KING’S SPEECH 14 UNICORN KID 15 VAMPIRE WEEKEND January 2011 PAWS 3

D E T T O P S

Here are some of the stars spotted last term around campus: David Dimbleby, that immovable arbiter of fair discussion, failing to gain entry to an address in Kensington Square and subsequently looking confused. Dimbleby was also seen hailing a taxi and taking a long phone call on Derry Street. Could it be that he’s hanging around in the hope of absorbing some of our students’ analytical prowess?

Jude Law and Sienna Miller holding hands outside The Greyhound. Our Spotter was so open-jawed at seeing Jude that Sienna had to be forcibly pointed out to him. *Ahem.* Piers Morgan bravely prancing up the High Street.

He is humorously known to Private Eye readers as ‘Piers Moron’, but Spotted couldn’t possibly comment. Allegedly.

Simon Cowell leaving the Sony Music studios in Derry Street. Our inimitable Spotter shouted Simon’s name and received the following nugget of wisdom in response: “Hi.” Such was the immediate and life-changing impact of this fine comment that he could only manage a photo of Simon’s car.

Sir Richard Branson on Heythrop campus itself!

One student wasted no time in asking him for a tenner, but was sadly disappointed in this noble pursuit. My crafty Spotter reveals Sir Richard had been completing some mystery filming in Kensington Square.

Jimmy White, champion snooker player, being pulled over by the police. My man on the ground was reduced to tutting vigorously.

Jennie Bond and Gloria Hunniford, veteran television personalities, filming in Kensington Square for their latest programme, Rip Off Britain. Any link between this programme and our college catering is entirely in your mind...

Take That’s Howard Donald, shopping in Whole Foods and agreeing with our intrepid Spotter that the high price of oranges has indeed become worthy of comment.

Billie Piper, ex pop sensation and Tardis pilot, laden with endless bags of shopping on the High Street. Drawn like Honey to the B, our Spotter could only watch her disappear towards Notting Hill...

Emily Maitlis, presenter on BBC’s Newsnight, near The Churchill Arms. Spotted is puzzled how anyone can walk past that fine establishment without halting for a cheeky pint.

HRH Prince Michael of Kent being driven to his apartment within Kensington Palace. One excitable woman nearby was heard to exclaim, “It’s Prince Philip! But he’s got a beard!”

And finally... Lord Lucan.

Compiled by Edward Cain with thanks to: Gareth Hughes, George Camm, Luke Hehir, Barrie Nelson, Pete Williams, Louie Lumsden and Gala Jackson-Coombs.

4 PAWS January 2011

A ‘mention in despatches’ for our Spotters brave enough to venture further afield in search of the following: HM The Queen catching a train at Waterloo station. (The downturn hits us all eventually.) Alex Turner and Matt Helder of the Arctic Monkeys, model Alexa Chung and television presenter George Lamb all attending a Miles Kane gig. Jack Black and Florence Welch at the Arcade Fire concert. And the surreal Tim Minchin out for a drink with Noel Fielding in Soho.

S A M T S CHRI E D A R E U Q S A M 0 1 0 2 L BAL

COMMENT

BY JT WHITE & JOSH FERG USON

E G U L E D E H T FIGHTING Just as a little thought experiment, let’s consider, for a moment, the ramifications of allowing The X Factor to be accepted as normal and tolerable in everyday society. I do, of course, have nothing wrong with the central tenet of the program, viz. that some people are simply born better than others, but what I object to is allowing the bastard public to choose what saturates the airwaves. The kind of aggressively boring, offensively non-offensive MOR cookie-cutter crap that shows like this churn out is to real creativity what E-Z Cheez is to finest Brie. What truly gets my knickers in a twist (as we say in the ghetto) is the fact that The X Factor represents cultural and creative stagnation. Andy Warhol’s nightmarish prophecy of every worthless schmuck being famous for 15 minutes has been brought to life, and the lurching monstrosity of Simon Cowell’s biggest money spinner shrieks omens of doom for every kind of artist who wants to experiment, to push the envelope, or people who find Jedward offensive.

This show, culturally and creatively speaking, is a faecal deluge splashing across the screen in a brown and slightly sticky wave. As an indicator of the cultural intelligence of our generation, it’s a pretty poor showing. Let’s consider: in 1977 we had Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, David Bowie, Iggy Pop, 6 PAWS January 2011

Funkadelic, Bob Dylan, and so on and on. In 2010, we have… Cheryl Cole, JLS, Alexandra Burke, and the vapidly pretentious and repetitive brain-melt of .

Oh, and Glee. Welcome to the world of tomorrow, ladies and gentlemen. But anyway, that was only a thought experiment. I’m just glad I don’t live in a world where that might be the case.

conduct which could count as evidence for criminal insanity or c) you are an absolute cretin who cannot tell a good thing from a stick up your arse.

Don’t bother arguing with me, because you cannot

As a further indicator of the inevitable decline of Western civilisation that will land us all scrounging for food in a nuclear war-ravaged world, one only needs to look at the movies. There are so many horrible things about Hollywood I could get my bloodthirsty serrated teeth into, but of all them, none of them grates more than my own personal favourite punching-bag: The Twilight Franchise. Let the deflecting of the cascade of faeces commence!

Before I go onwards to offend loads of people and shoot my mouth off, I should probably make a blanket statement saying that I have nothing against people who enjoy Twilight. But I can’t do that, because I’d just be going to Hell for lying. If you like Twilight, you are an idiot. And that isn’t just me being a b*stard, that’s cold hard FACT, right there.

If you like Twilight, you must fulfil one or all of the following criteria: a) you cannot recognise good story structure b) You are emotionally stunted and cannot differentiate between rational behaviour and

Daniel Radcliffe as Harry Potter

argue rationally in favour of Twilight. There’s just so much wrong with it.

Firstly, the whole concept of the vampire has been horribly inverted by this film. Dracula, the first modern vampire novel, set up the vampire as a predatory creature, designed to unchain the repressed sexuality in Victorian culture. Biting the neck, the disease in the blood… there is so much symbolism for sex and syphilis that I could fill this whole article with examples. Now, with Twilight, Count Dracula the dark and ominous sexual seducer in the darkness has been replaced by a whiny little bitch in the form of Edward Cullen, solar-powered disco-ball. Apparently this centuries-old vampire doesn’t think sex before marriage is right. Jesus, even Anne Rice vampires have more nuts than this guy. Twilight is nothing less than Stephanie Meyer, devout Mormon, imposing her sick morality on legions of impressionable children and simpletons, causing them to think that stalking is romance, and that a woman should serve a man no matter what his faults are. I don’t want to sound (more) hysterical here, but Twilight is probably the most disgusting franchise in the world, because it’s horrifically trying to impose a twisted and diseased set of principles on the world. Just think, if a generation of kids and dullards are brought up believing the kind of bullsh*t that Stephanie Meyer would have them think, then the world is going to be a very, very frightening place when those children and prats grow up.

Rather than simply bang on about why Harry Potter isn’t worth the paper it’s printed on, we thought we would use a more interesting illustration of this banal puerile writing style. As a little thought experiment, we imagined what twists and turns Chuck Palahniuk would introduce to the innocent land of Harry Potter, and came up with this: It would begin with two youths alienated from society, namely Harry and Ron, engaging in an act of fornication so horrifying we probably could not portray it with the Standard English vocabulary, so the author might describe it as “desuckrulating”. After desuckrulating each other with extended vigour, and having cleaned up the unmentionable fluids, Harry spends 45 minutes examining his wand (with full double entendre) espousing convention shattering axioms and imagining a scene of completely gratuitous mass-murder committed with it. At which point Hermione then walks in and proceeds to vomit exposition at them about Dumbledore having completely hauled off and started killing students in imaginative and ironic ways, but nobody wants to stop him because they are so enthralled by his antics and want to see what he’ll do next. Then they all have an enormous gang-bang, with Hermione as the “centre-piece”, before Neville Longbottom is disembowelled by a water-inlet port in Hogwarts Municipal Swimming Pool.

That’s a book you’d want to read! Then the sequels. Then the movies, and then the sequels to the movies. Then buy the goddamn DVDs. In the world which JK Rowling created the pupils of Hogwarts are embedded in a perfectly competitive educational institution which rewards the good over the evil. This simplistic and unambiguous onedimensional dynamic is a constant throughout, Harry Potter and his friends succeed as a result of their cartoon-like “meritorious qualities”. Where the state, in the form of the Ministry of Magic, is depicted as bureaucratic and inefficient. The curriculum at Hogwarts is almost entirely devoid of arts and humanities, the emphasis is on the kind of “priority subjects” adored by the incumbents in Whitehall.

Whereas in the twisted world, the brain-child of Chuck Palahniuk, the highly competitive and covet-

ous market forces, that lurk beneath the gloss of American society, are present but become the focus of subversion and satire. For instance the agent in Survivor has amassed a collection of names for the cures for cancer and AIDS, so that once the cures have been invented it is likely that the name for the miracle drug will have to be purchased from him at an exorbitant rate of course. The cities and towns where these tales take place are nameless and littered with monuments to late capitalism, which the protagonist of Fight Club demolishes in one truly unforgettable anarchic climax. A major theme of Palahniuk’s novels is the attempt to reach out to others and forge meaningful bonds, to break through in liminal spheres in which individuals participate as a collective. The stratification of society is left at the door of fight clubs where white-collar executives and mechanics beat each other to a bloody pulp.

To say that there isn’t much in the way of drama to watch on television these days is a masterstroke of the Great British Understatement. The void is filled with ‘Celebrity TV’ which is essentially junk-food news to keep coach potatoes and lard-arsed layabouts watching long enough to catch an advert or two for much needed deodorant. Programmes driven by the likes of Katie Price are aired as “filling”, adverts are “content” and have to be aired, whereas footage of Peter Andre being himself, e.g. an irritating orange ninny, is just something to stuff into the fissures that separate the “content”, because you can’t have entire programmes dedicated to selling consumers toothpaste and tampons. This nonsense has to be littered throughout the frustratingly frequent breaks that you can just pause and forward through later (if you have Sky+).

Take Kerry Katona’s recent implosion onto the screen. A controlled implosion devised and pushed by a team of ravenous agents and backstabbing advisers, but an implosion nonetheless. The disarray is held up for the viewer, a consumer in waiting, to see and absorb it. Breakdowns and brats, divorces and financial malaise, self-harm, drugs and booze are thrown in on top for viewers to gorge on. These problems are common in our society, but we have to care because she used to be an Atomic Kitten - nearly a decade ago. Luckily the Atomic Kitten

Katie Price Glamour Model

Kerry Katona Reality TV Star

has agents, life-coaches, advisers, a TV crew and the paparazzi to fall back on. There will always be another photo-shoot, interview or TV show to churn out for the rabble to swarm around. The Katona brats attend private-school, partly paid for by the agents and partly by the parasite press, they are pampered and will no doubt go on to achieve as the privileged spawn do. The cultural hypocrisy of celebrity is like a faecal deluge pebble-dashing our society without end in sight.

Katona is a celebrity the problems are turned into the crises and catastrophes that could make headlines. These are hyper-real problems, the disorders of celebrity life are magnified to the point that these common problems (such as break-ups) are turned into atrocities and personas are left mangled in the press. Only so the persona can be reinvented by the media before being chewed up, by the media, and reinvented again, by the media. So in the case of ‘Celebrity TV’ it may be that the audience is being sold more than aftershave and moisturiser during the breaks as the problems and leisure activities of a celebrity are commodities today. For the working-class a person’s labour is what is sold for a wage, for celebrities it is recreation and dysfunction that are sold to the mass-media. The endless conveyor-belt of tabloid twaddle, punctuated by sex scandals and malfunctioning wardrobes, is the reified fallout of celebrity life which is in turn reified for us to view on ITV. This would be why most “celebs” are primarily known for being known.

Real TV is hard to come by, as anything will suffice so long as it’s got a few “celebs” here and there crying their eyes out. When one does find some serious telly it is nonetheless worth it. There is the Wire, a televised novel set in the impoverished and dope-addled streets of Baltimore. Let alone Mad Men and Breaking Bad. And in comedy there is Peep Show, a show about the inadequacies and shortcomings of two opposites paired together for the sake of sadistic hilarity. Meet Mark, an uptight middle-class prig with the charisma of Gordon Brown and a penchant for history. Enter Jez, a musical twit with a love of drug-alcohol orientated fun and casual guilt-free shagging. Together Mark and Jez are a recipe for explosive mirth at the expense of the unremitting darkness of their lives.

January 2011 PAWS 7

COMMENT

Women in The Workplace Ms. Mollie Puttock ponders the female role, specifically in the armed forces It appears to me that “female” is now percieved as nothing more than a politically correct term in the corporate world, a box each workforce has to tick on their equal opportunities form, and this is not right. It makes no sense that women are seen as a minority group, when although men outnumber women in global population, it is in the UK (like nearly all over European countries) the other way round. Feminism is about equal rights for women and that is how I wish to be treated; equally. I do not want to be placed on a pedestal and given different rules and regulations to men. This just furthers the old stereotype that women need to be given extra help in order to achieve what a man can.

The differences within the workplace have been tackled to a degree, in the way in which jobs that were stereotypically male have been linguistically changed in order to accommodate the female side of the workforce, such as the change from policeman to police officer and chairman to chair person. However, there are still many problems facing women at work ,such as the way in which women are still paid lower wages than men for 8 PAWS January 2011

doing the same job in many companies. As well as how women are often not given the highest ranking jobs even though they have the qualifications, because of the worry that they will take maternity leave and cost the company money. Although, this has been somewhat tackled by the introduction of paternity leave.

I had a long conversation with my boyfriend that completely clarified this understanding for me.

As he used to be a soldier (5 years of service: Afghanistan and Kosovo after signing up at 16), I asked him how he felt about women in the armed forces. He explained how he had no problem with anyone of any gender, age, ethnic background working with him as long as they could do the job properly. The issue seems to be, he highlighted, that as women are given longer run times and have to meet lower and lower strength expectations, when they are on exercise or at war they often are unable to keep up. He told me of many times where a man had to carry the woman’s burden as well as his own as she could not carry it, therefore slowing down the group and causing danger for them all. This is, of course, not true of all women

in the army ,but it seems to me that if the levels of fitness that are stated for men are what is needed to do the job then surely women need to also fit this criteria. That is equality.

I write these feminist-style articles in the hope of inspiring some thought amongst others on the subjects I expose, taking the content from my day to day life, in order to get my understanding out there and also to answer some of the questions I have in life. Such as; should I dress differently in order to deter men from looking at me and seeing me as an object not a person? And when does the line cross from artistic representation of the female form to pornography? Life as a woman in 2010 is difficult and confusing, the modern culture of this country has not been thoroughly discussed and I believe it should, as it does not seem that we are yet “liberated”. I find myself fighting for equality, for the understanding that all people from every walk of life are different but equal. I hope this is portrayed in my articles. And why should the majority of feminist-style literature be written by middle class, middle age, divorcees ? It is surely all women who feel the anger when witnessing sexism.

COMMENT

I VOTED FOR UNCERTAINTY Why I think the 2010 election was headed for cuts, and why I think we have to accept them.

Mark Bevan – Second Year Philosophy Undergraduate Thinking back to the May 2010 Election, anything could happen, apart from a Liberal Democrat government that is! To be really honest, I’m not really sure what people expected - something different I felt! We got something different, the Conservative-Liberal Democrat “Con-Dem” coalition - we got what we voted for. I’m not quite sure what people wanted, people seem to think that the Liberal Democrats have won and they can force any issues through. It seems inevitable that future students are going to face higher something, most likely higher tuition fees – against the election promise of the Lib Dems, I reiterate they didn’t win, so I don’t see why they should get a majority say against the Conservatives. I have to take a rain check, and just say that I think (with slight concessions that are becoming apparent) tuition fees are going to be higher – no matter the protests, peaceful or not. However, I feel that even if Labour had got in, it would be the same, it’s not like Labour set up the Browne review or anything.

One of my biggest concerns is that people are opposing the tuition fee increase while not arguing a credible alternative, this alternative seems to be the graduate tax – championed by the NUS, though if you view the NUS website today, I can’t find the exact proposal within two clicks (though a third will lead to “The Blueprint” which while sounding fruitful leads to nothing concrete), to me it seems like they don’t want you to know their point of view – even more, they seem to have abandoned their protests and are now support writing to MPs who support no rise in tuition fees (while they specifically say not just Lib Dem MPs but it seems kind of intuitive to me that’s who they are targeting since the Conservatives mostly support the Browne Review, and 18 Lib Dem MPs are now bound by collective responsibility, making that 39 MPs who matter to write to). Though ULU are doing a fine protest in lieu.

I just think that the main points of the Browne review must be put forward more to you – do you not think maintenance should be higher? Shouldn’t parttime students receive more proportionate support? Shouldn’t the expense on graduates be proportionate? Shouldn’t student finance be simpler? And the biggest thing for me – higher education is free at the point of entry in the current plan. I cannot help but argue that the student loan is the best loan of your life - especially compared to the mortgages many of us will have, and will be in much better terms than us now.

While sadly I agree that arts subjects will suffer, I feel impelled that it is hard, nor unintuitive not to make a list of best to worst disciplines to study on a economic basis. As much as in the ideal world I would not like to say that someone should miss out – but many of our parents are, and much of the population are, I do not see why we as students shouldn’t be in the same position (yes I am aware of this creating a spiral of our economy going into downfall, but I do not feel this is within the scope of this article, but will gladly discuss this with anyone who brings me a good argument - with some warning, so I can give a competent rebuttal) I know much of you at Heythrop will disagree with my point of view but to me the fact that only 3% (using the most up to date figures from the Higher Education Statistic Agency - of which will have probably increased due to recession and liberal estimates of the NUS demonstration) of students have demonstrated makes me believe that these decisions are not unsupported – though Nick Clegg should just say it out loud.

January 2011 PAWS 9

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H C E E P S S ’ KING IEWS TH

H REV G IN S J A T R SA

There are two types of movies that always soften the tough exterior of the voting committee for the Academy Awards. The first is biographies, whether it’s about Johnny Cash or Howard Hughes; they are always guaranteed to rake in some gold. The second is films about monarchy, in particular, the British monarchy. Whether it is Dame Judi Dench in Shakespeare in Love or Helen Mirren in The Queen, these films are always guaranteed to get nods from the esteemed Oscar members across the pond. Despite walking into this film with the knowledge of this cliché, for lack of a better phrase, I found the King`s Speech to be a heart-warming tale, with superb acting, writing, comedy and pacing.

The movie tells the story of George VI, who at the start of the film is the Duke of York. All his life he has suffered from a speech impediment. Many have tried to help him overcome this problem, including royal physicians; however they prove to be hopeless. His wife, Elizabeth Bowes Lyon, goes to a man known as Lionel Logue, an Australian speech therapist who is known for his very unorthodox methods. The Duke is rather reluctant at first. However, through the course of the movie we see a friendship develop between the two men, and see that Lionel may not just be trying to make him eloquent but also to inspire a sense of confidence in a man who he says “is scared of his own shadow”.

The first thing that really has to be applauded about this movie is the direction from Tom Hooper. From the very opening shot of this movie, I was transported and really felt like I was in 1930s London. One other thing that Hooper got really right aside from the authenticity of 1930s Britain was the sense of pace. The story moved at a nice speed, there were plenty character moments and overall it did not drag. But if there is one thing to nitpick about, the pacing during some of the scenes where George is preparing for his coronation with Lionel could have been improved. Some of his motivation, that I had got from a couple of scenes prior was repeated and was unnecessary. Despite this, Hooper really impressed me as this was 12 PAWS January 2011

HE YEAR

M OF T IL F T S E G E BIG

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the first movie I had seen of his, and there were some interesting sequences. The most notable for me being the pivotal scene where George has to do something very courageous as King, and the how Hooper filmed it was amazing, really giving the scene weight and an emotional punch. He also got some great performances out of the actors and provided the heavy dialogue sequences with a sense of fun.

and had the potential to be an inspirational leader. It was truly a great performance and I really hope Rush gets at least nominated for Best Supporting Actor Oscar.

Colin Firth plays George VI. He, in my opinion, is one of the biggest draws for this movie. While he got plenty of acclaim for his performance in Tom Hooper`s previous film “The Single Man”, this film will finally prove to girls that he not only good for playing Mr Darcy in Pride and Prejudice, and show to the rest of the movie going public that is not just good for the lead for romantic comedies. His performance was mesmerising, from frame one when I first saw his character, I was completely invested. The most amazing aspect of his performance for me was his physicality. Firth has always been quite a beefy and tall person but the fact that he made me forget this when I was watching him just absolutely floored me. He made me believe that not only did he have a problem with his speech but also he was a very timid, shy person, almost childlike who had been living in the shadow of others his whole life, be it is his father George V or his brother Richard.

While I thought there were so many good performances recently worthy of an Oscar nomination, I can safely say that without a shadow of a doubt, Colin Firth deserves to get nominated and win; it’s truly an amazing performance.

I also want to briefly discuss some of the supporting actors; it was great to see some great British character actors playing some of the world’s most important historical figures. My favourite being Timothy Spall as Winston Churchill, who embodied the character so much in his small amount of time on screen.

Geoffrey Rush plays Lionel Logue. Having only really seen him chewing up the scenery in the Pirates of the Caribbean movies, I was truly looking forward to seeing a very straight performance from Rush. He did not disappoint, he was funny, charismatic and had a very good presence on screen. Whether he was doing acting of famous plays such as Richard III or coaching George, I really got a sense that his character despite mentoring a Duke was not intimated nor looked on him with a sense of bitterness. He truly saw a man who was very human

Helen Bonham Carter plays Elizabeth Bowes Lyon, the wife of George VI and the future Queen mother.

Not too much to say about her, aside from that she provides the movie with another great emotional beat.

She believes in her husband and loves him despite his problems. Bonham Carter always known for playing the unhinged of society, proves her acting versatility, providing some of the best comedic moments in the movie.

Overall The King`s Speech is an absolutely gem of a movie. Despite its subject matter screaming Oscar bait, it does deserve all the awards and praise being thrown at it. This is because it is a universal story that proves just because you are born into privilege, it does not mean you are set for life. George VI`s problems in this movie are very human and relatable, which has undoubtedly lead to the success of the film.

While Tom Hooper`s direction is commendable, it really is Colin Firth`s movie. His performance elevates it from being great to absolutely fantastic. This is definitely one for movie buffs and those looking for a serious cinematic experience with all the traits of what make a film truly awe inspiring.

N O I L E TH !

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UNICORN KID Almaz Messenger interviews Oliver Sabin a.k.a Unicorn Kid on his music and his growing fame.

I’m in a hot, sweaty little venue called The Joiners Arms on St Mary’s street in Southampton. In control of various electronic devices, leaping to the heavy bass, similarly dripping with sweat, A tall young man in a lion hat jumps about on stage surrounded by frenzied graphics and frantic strobes. The young man in question is Oliver Sabin aka ‘Unicorn Kid,’ an electronic music/chip music composer and musician from Edinburgh. At the tender age of 18 he has already toured with Owl City in the USA, supported Calvin Harris, been signed and released on the Ministry of Sound label and officially remixed Gorillaz and The Pet Shop Boys. He also played many festivals during the summer, including T in the Park.

After his hair-raising, 8-bit soaked, bass-saturated ride of a show we go outside to the street where he sits down on a bollard which he offers me first with a huge magnetic grin on his face, still drenched. He tells me he’s no good at interviews, but he’s totally rid of awkwardness and carries an air of ease and warmth. And so we have a good old chat outside a venue where the up and coming Coldplay, Oasis and Friendly Fires, to name a few, have played.

First of all, congratulations on the gig!

Thank you, it was so emotional! This interview, let’s do it.

You could have been Horse Kid, you could have been Bear kid, you could have even been Lion Kid, but you are Unicorn Kid. Why? Well...essentially, the unicorn matches the fun, the almost magical nature of the music. You can visualize unicorns; you can visualize the happiest, relentlessly positive situation ever. And that’s why I think it fits.

What would you say your musical influences are?

I listen to all kinds of stuff, I guess something undeniable is the Game Boy, 8-bit videogame sound. That’s a huge, huge part of what I do. I think essentially, my music isn’t purely that, but instead it kind of draws from that whole kind of scene and the melodic structures that come with it. And each song in my head’s got a scene or a thought/idea which I translate into music and that’s 14 PAWS January 2011

where it comes from. I’ll see something that hits me, that’s really quite profound and I’ll go home and write a song and capture it through melodies and I guess that’s easier to do without lyrics because you can just translate those images into sound. And obviously I’ll listen to other music stuff, a lot of Lo-Fi and Neon Indian but then I’ll also listen to a lot of mainstream electronic music, left-field progressive, and all that’s going on on Warp Records.

Just capturing everything that’s going on into your music then?

Absolutely! Without kind of sounding like a copy. I guess that’s the overall aim! Like at times I’ll get so, so into an artist, and a few days later I’ve just re-written one of their songs! (laughter) Can’t have none of that! Okay, what would you be doing if not music?

I’d be at art school. I left school a year early, having being selected for art school, Royal Edinburgh College of Art, that was always the plan. Even when I was applying there was music industry buzz happening at the time, and I was about to sign to a publishing company, I wasn’t quite sure what was gonna happen there.

Went for the interview, wasn’t sure if I was going to get in, did get in and then I signed to EMI publishing, and had just been asked to tour with Owl City in America...

I thought I can go to art school any time in my life, even when I’m 30. I think I will in the end, as that was always the plan Still do art as a hobby?

Well yeah, everything I do, I guess, is Unicorn Kid, I don’t really have hobbies outside of that, this is my hobby.

So where do you see yourself in five years time?

Perhaps still doing Unicorn Kid. I’d like the next few years to go really well. I want the album, when it comes out to do really well, like charting would be awesome... but then, why wouldn’t I want it to do well?(chuckles) I’d love to keep touring, release a second album. I’ll still be making music in whatever form, be it producer or

anything. But I think Unicorn Kid will still be alive and kicking in 5 years time...I hope so!

So do I! This is probably the most important question of the whole interview.

Ok But then, maybe not. Ready for it? (clears throat) Lady GaGa or Beyonce?!

Lady GaGa all the way!! I love her so much I just couldn’t even like, explain.

I see I’ve hit the spot here.

Seriously, such a big fan. Do you know, I even thought at one point I had a good way of meeting her? Because after I remixed the Pet Shop Boys, I found out they’re good friends with her. And then she got to know Jake Shears, lead singer from Scissor Sisters through the Pet Shop Boys, and he came to my show in London, we met up and that and I’m like...Jake and the Pet Shop Boys both know lady GaGa really well, so I’m literally one step away from meeting her...

Get in there!

Well, if it all came together...but she’s too famous now!

That was all in the Just Dance days (laughter).

Imagine doing a remix for Gaga I would die. Literally the end. It’d be my final piece. I’d do like, a 12 minute epic!

The end. Yes. ‘The End’ in the biggest echoing voice.

And so I see this as a fitting end to a lovely little chat.

The taping stops, I give him my best wishes, chat a little more and he goes to pack up. To me, he gives off an abundance of youthful energy and fun, but still has obviously set goals. And he knows how to reach them.

His easiness and sense of fun joined with his focus make him a very exciting new artist. I can’t help but think we’ll be seeing a lot more of his trademark lion hat, his earnest sweat-saturated leaping, and hearing his euphoric 8-bit melody lines dancing with his shuddering bass in the not too distant future.

VAMPIRE WEEKEND & JANELLE MONAE Almaz Messenger reviews the two acts at Alexandra Palace The freezing halls of Alexandra Palace experienced the warmth of a summer festival when the eccentric afro-beat of Vampire Weekend and the eclectic R&B of Janelle Monae burst onto the stage. Both acts are in a class of their own in terms of originality, and both acts owned the stage with their fresh brand of pop.

Though very different, both of the acts are alike in their passion for innovation and creativity. Monae was first with her band, entirely clad in their uniform monochrome. With dancers dressed as a nun and one in a burka, slick graphics and theatrical fights onstage her performance was every bit a spectacle as it was an audio experience.

She showed off her excellent voice in her rendition of ‘Smile’ backed only by her guitarist, but it was in her more well know and up-tempo songs ‘Tightrope’ and ‘Cold War’ when the crowd got moving-and the place started to get warmer.

Then came the Vampire Weekend, Ezra the front man dressed in a scarf, perhaps feeling the chill. Opening with the summery ‘Holiday’ the crowd was alive immediately. Ezra’s distinctive high voice cuts through the African influenced rhythms and melodies and puts an innovative twist on both the genre’s of afro-beat and indie-pop. From the first couple of seconds of a Vampire Weekend song, you know who it is, and you can’t help but feel that the band are smugly very pleased with themselves. And why not. Their latest album ‘Contra’ went to number 3 in the official UK chart, a significant improvement on their debut’s 15 charting, and although their music is undoubtedly eccentric they have found the balance between innovation and

accessibility.

You can always trust A Punk to get a party started and that’s exactly what it did, with perhaps the biggest sing-a-long of the night apart from One(Blake’s got a new face). When it came to the new Contra material, the crowd were just as enthusiastic, taking part in the ultra high warbling of ‘White Sky’ and during the encore, ‘Horchata’. The more ambitious and slower tempo songs from the album, such as ‘I Think Ur a Contra’ were received well and actually sounded better live.

Lyrically, the foursome from New York are as weird, and as wonderful as ever, with lines such as ‘In December drinking horchata, I’d look psychotic in a balaclava’ and ‘Your tokugawa smile and your garbage style, used to save the night’. The sunny melodies and rhythms keep the lyrics light yet still compliment them.

Both Monae and Vampire Weekend could have interacted with the audience more, Monae not speaking at all and Ezra only speaking when absolutely necessary. However, their music and stage presence was good enough for this not to really affect the mood of the concert at all.

The evening ended in a flurry of confetti and giant balloons, the biting cold long forgotten in the 2 hours of summer drenched fun. If there were one word to sum up the whole night, it’d be escapism.

Pure escapism.

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