2013 Bridal Guide

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ewly engaged couples choose to capture the occasion in photos that they can cherish. Often, one of these photos is used as an announcement to family and friends and might even be published in the newspaper. Engagement photos may be part of a package negotiated with the photographer who will be covering the wedding day. Some couples enlist the help of a friend or a budding photographer to capture an engagement shot. The average cost of engagement photos can range from $200 to $500. Some couples opt to use a photographer who might specialize in other areas (i.e. fashion models) but may want to break into the wedding biz because of how lucrative it can be. Costs may be negotiated as a result. When shopping around for a photogJ<< <E>8><D<EK G?FKFJ G8>< ))

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ngaged couples about to take a trip down the aisle are increasingly choosing to pay for the wedding themselves. Where it used to be tradition for the bride’s parents to handle the bill for the occasion, today the responsibility for funding has largely fallen into the hands of the prospective bride and groom. To meet the financial demands of the modern wedding, some individuals turn to loans for financing a portion or all of the wedding. You may question whether this is a good idea. As with any situation, there are pros and cons. The same can be said about a wedding loan. The following are some factors you will need to consider before taking out a loan. One of the most important things to realize is that a wedding loan, like any loan, will need to be paid back and interest fees will be included. What that means is that, by the end of the payback period, you will have spent several thousand dollars more on the loans than the original principal amount when interest is added in. If you’re taking out a loan because you’ve already gone above budget on wedding expenses, a loan may push that budget even further into the red. That being said, there are some instances where a loan may be an option that works for a couple. For example, couples who anticipate considerable monetary gifts from guests attending the wedding can offset the cost of the loan with those gifts. Some couples might begin their professional careers after their wedding, which will increase their salary enough to repay the loan quickly. Others may actually have the money for the wedding, but want to use a loan as a way to establish strong joint credit as a new couple. However, many couples take out loans because they simply cannot afford their dream wedding. In a world where many people already live beyond their means -- financing cars, homes, retail purchases -- a wedding loan may just be another shovelful of soil on a financial grave. The consensus among financial experts is that it is better to scale back the wedding or postpone it until you can save money the old-fashioned way instead of taking out a loan. But if a loan seems the only option, here are some tips. • Shop around on a wedding loan, just as with any other loan. Find the best rates and terms before settling on a lender. • Decide how much you can afford to pay back within 2 to 3 years and how much the monthly payment will be. Then take out the loan only in that amount. • Figure out which portions of the wedding can be

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Make-your-own

N<;;@E> @EM@K8K@FEJ : ost-conscious couples today seek different ways they can reduce expenses on their weddings. Do-it-yourself weddings have grown in popularity, and creating personalized wedding invitations is one way to save money and dream up something special. Wedding invitations can range in prices depending on the service used. Many brick-and-mortar printing companies have gone by the wayside, and online printing sources have replaced them. The reduced overhead means that many online retailers can produce wedding invitations at a lower cost than in years past. That doesn’t mean they are cheap, however. Couples can expect to pay anywhere from $150 to $500 on invitations depending on style and quantity, according to estimates from many printing company Web sites. Expect to pay around $90 (U.S.) for postage if mailing 100 standard invitations that do not require extra postage and include stamped response cards. In order to avoid overpaying for wedding invitations, or simply to create

a personalized invitation, many couples are opting to go the do-it-yourself route. DIY invitations are even more common thanks to the popularity of scrapbooking and papercrafting. Although people may have different standards in terms of quality for their invitations, it’s important to realize the invitation is the first thing guests often see concerning the wedding, and they will help set the tone of the upcoming nuptials. Today there are many options when it comes to making invitations oneself. Couples can be as hands-on or handsoff as they like. Here are some choices to consider. • Design it yourself, but hire a printer. Couples can visit Web sites that enable them to choose paper type, ink color, a certain template, wording, color scheme, embellishments, dye-cutting, and many other different options. Then the couple sits back and waits for the invites to come in the mail where they are put together before being sent out. J<< @EM@K8K@FEJ G8>< ))

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hose thinking about tying the knot in the months to come may be discouraged by how expensive weddings can be. But with a little ingenuity and a hands-on approach, couples can have a wedding that is inexpensive and memorable at the same time. According to CostofWedding.com, on average, U.S. couples spend $26,542 for their weddings. Weddingbells magazine states that the average cost for a wedding in Canada is $23,330, up from $20,129 in 2010. These amounts do not include the cost for an engagement ring or wedding bands. With such a high price tag, some couples may wonder if they can afford their dream wedding or if there are ways to cut costs. Having a backyard, DIY wedding can be the answer. Although some may envision a backyard wedding with picnic benches and Dad at the grill, it can be a much classier affair than that. Smart couples are realizing that the money they would normally spend on a big wedding at an outside venue can be put to better use, either through buying a new home or fixing up one they may already own. Furthermore, for couples who are picky about details, having a DIY event ensures that they can control the details and have them as personal as they would like.

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Getting Started

A DIY wedding is one that will take much more work than simply hiring vendors and leaving the details to them. But the money saved with sweat equity can be substantial. A well-planned wedding is the best start. Grab a notebook and start making lists of all the things you will need: › cfZXk`fe › kXYc\j Xe[ Z_X`ij › c`e\ej › ]ff[ › j`cm\inXi\ Xe[ ^cXjjnXi\ › `em`kXk`fej › g_fkf^iXg_p › dlj`Z › f]ÔZ`Xek › dlj`Z › Z\ek\ig`\Z\j Xe[ fk_\i [\Zfi › ZXb\ fi [\jj\ik › c`^_k`e^ For your Wedding › Xkk`i\ › Õfn\ij or Bridal Shower

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Many items necessary for a wedding can be bought in advance. Some couples find that purchasing low-cost items at discount stores turns out to be less expensive than renting. For example, inexpensive glasses and silverware can be bought at dollar stores or chains like Ikea. Later on these

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Readying the Venue

Because couples will be doing the work themselves, it’s best to start several days in advance of the wedding (weather permitting). Be sure the grounds are well groomed and landscaped. Ensure there are no tripping hazards and that there is a sturdy surface for placing tables or creating a dance floor. It may pay to ask an electrician or someone who dabbles in electric work to help string some lights to better illuminate the area, especially for when the sun goes down. Set up the tables and chairs to finalize placement the day before. Figure

out where the ceremony will take place. A small arbor can mark the area and make a nice photo backdrop. Dress the tables with linens and settings the morning of the wedding. One splurge couples may want to make is hiring a waitstaff to help set up food service areas, serve as bartenders and clear away dishes and other messes. This way the bride and groom can mingle with guests.

Other Tips and Tricks

Here are some other ways to save money on DIY weddings. • Fruit is less expensive than flowers for centerpieces. • Include postcard response cards in wedding invites. The postage is less, and you don’t have to spend money on an extra envelope. • Be sure to check with your town if you need a permit or variance for having so many cars parked by the house

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skills in certain areas, which can be tapped for the wedding. There may be a gourmet chef, a disc jockey, a photographer or even someone who can officiate the vows. Having these people on board means a great reduction in costs.

in the event of a backyard wedding. Otherwise you could be facing a fine. • Many different foods can be cooked in advance and frozen instead of hiring a catering service. • Consider favors that also double as table centerpieces. • Bouquets can easily be made with store-bought flowers, some floral tape and decorative ribbon. • Restrict the bar to wine and beer, and you’ll save money on expensive liquors. A DIY wedding can be a fun, memorable event that costs a couple a fraction of what it would be to have it held at an expensive location. — Metro

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items can be kept, sold or even donated to shelters. Tablecloths don’t have to be the traditional kind. It may be less expensive to purchase pieces of fabric from a fabric store and dressing them up oneself. Candles can be stockpiled relatively easy and provide a very affordable means of ambient light. Plan out centerpiece ideas and figure out which components can be bought and stored. Then items can be assembled at leisure. Wedding stationery is one thing that will have to be bought well in advance so there will be time enough to printout save-the-dates, invitations and response cards, as well as mail them. An informal wedding may mean couples can get simple attire. Buying off the rack may mean a smaller price tag for gowns. Gentleman may be able to fare with sportcoats and slacks. Purchase wardrobe essentials several months in advance to be sure there will be time for alterations, if necessary. Enlist the help of family and friends to get many of the tasks completed. Upon asking, many couples find there are members of the family who have

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very couple wants their wedding “Friends” or “Star Trek,” popular teleto be memorable. The goal of vision shows have been transformed planning a wedding is to creinto festive wedding themes. Whether ate an experience that everyone will the idea is to go daring and exchange remember for years to come. For some vows in costume or simply name recepcouples, a theme wedding is the best tion tables according to characters or way to accomplish just that. show locations, couples can include a When it comes time to select a little television fun into the event. theme, the day the wedding takes place • Fairytale: Many men and women may dictate the theme. For example, if envision a fairytale wedding complete the wedding takes place on Halloween, with horse-drawn carriage and the the ideas for the theme are easy. Many “happily ever after.” This is what makes other couples choose a theme that Disney properties as well as the varihighlights a specific interest or hobby ous castles around the world popular or something that is dear to them. Here backdrops for wedding events. Those are some popular wedding themes. planning a fairytale wedding need only • Holiday: The Christmas season look to favorite stories or movies for lends itself well to wedding plantheir inspiration. ning. The colors (red, green, gold) are • Interest or passion: Love to climb already established, and most churches mountains? Avid about scuba diving? and buildings are already decked out Couples who share a particular interin holiday finery, cutting down on the est can include elements of this sport amount of flowers and embellishments or hobby into their wedding. Invitacouples need. Because the holiday tions and decor can hint at the theme, season is so busy and a popular time and then special activities can further for socializing, couples who want to enhance it. Fish bowls as centerpieces tie the knot during this time of year may call to mind underwater advenshould send save-the-date cards well tures, while surfboard-shaped invites in advance. Another option is to have a may set the scene for a beachside party. “Christmas in July” wedding, featuring Theme weddings can add an extra the same holiday themes but without spice to the festivities and incorpothe hectic nature of the holiday season. rate couples’ interests into the event • Vegas: Couples who want to tie the — making it even more special. knot in Las Vegas but want to ensure — Metro all their loved ones can attend can recreate the magic of Vegas wherever they may be. Casino-inspired games and big buffet meals can make guests feel like they have stepped into a casino on the famed Vegas strip. In addition, FREE Toss Bouquet with an Elvis impersonator is the purchase of minimum essential to a Vegas wed$100 Wedding Order. ding. • TV show: Some Barstow, CA couples elevate certain Est. 1984 (760) 256-7175 television shows to cult 112 Years Combined Experience status. Whether it’s

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hances are those who have attended a wedding have witnessed some popular traditions take place. The bride wears a veil, a court of wedding attendants accompanies the bride and groom, and birdseed, rice or flower petals are tossed. But have you ever wondered why? The wedding customs are ripe with tradition and harken back to days when superstition and myth often ruled the day. There are many traditions surrounding a wedding that people simply accept. But understanding their origins can make the ceremony more meaningful. — Metro

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Choosing a hue for the bridesmaid gowns

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ridesmaids are an important part of the wedding party, and most brides opt to have a handful of close friends and family members play a special role in the wedding. Choosing a gown and a color that will flatter all of the bridesmaids typically takes a little work. An overwhelming majority of couples choose to have a formal wedding. The average number of bridesmaids for these formal weddings is four. Considering around two million weddings take place in North America every year, that’s a lot of bridesmaids for whom gowns and other attire must be planned. Many bridesmaids worry about the gowns they will wear come the big day. Horrible bridesmaid dresses have been the butt of jokes for years, and many people have their own stories of garish gowns they’ve been asked to don for a wedding. Some have said that brides intentionally choose ugly gowns for their bridesmaids to ensure they’re not outshined come the wedding day. Although this may be the case for some, most brides aspire to select gowns that will be flattering for all. And color scheme is integral in the choice of gown. Every well-planned wedding carries a color scheme throughout. This includes the color a bride selects for her bridesmaids to wear. But not every color accentuates everyone’s features. Therefore, some experimentation might be necessary to find a color that is flattering to all and fits with the color scheme.

Depending on hair color and skin shade, there are many flattering hues available for gowns. When making this decision, consider bridesmaids’ ethnicity and skin tone. African-American:Women with dark skin and hair may really shine in jewel-colored gowns, including silver, gold, purple and salmon. Very pale colors may be daring and conspicuous. Asian and olive-skinned women: Those with a slight yellow tone to their skin will look good in many colors, including red, navy, peach, and fuchsia. However, avoid colors in light yellow, aqua, gray, taupe, or mint, which may make the bridesmaid look washed out. Fair skin:Ladies with pale skin will benefit from richly colored gowns in jewel tones. Pastels may work, but be careful about those depending on hair color. Pink or red-hued gowns may clash with someone with auburn hair. Yellow and green may not work with a fair brunette. Gray and silver may wash out someone who is pale and blonde. Once a color is chosen, brides also need to consider the season. Certain colors may look out of place depending on the season. For example, an evergreen or deep blue may seem wintry during a summer wedding. Similarly, russet or brown may work for the autumn but not for a spring wedding. Many brides gravitate toward mid-level blues, greens, pinks and purples for their weddings, simply because those colors transcend

the seasons. After colors are worked out, the style of the gown deserves consideration. Because not every bridesmaid has the same physical attributes, many brides are now open to selecting a color and length and allowing the bridesmaid herself to choose the exact style. This way someone who is busty won’t feel uncomfortable in strapless, and someone who is thin won’t be overwhelmed by a lot of ruffles. The intent is to have bridesmaids feel beautiful and comfortable, and different styles can help achieve this. Making the effort to choose a gown color and style that is flattering to all in the bridal party will help the ladies feel they are truly a special part of the wedding. — Metro

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rides-to-be thinking of asking a pregnant friend or family member to be in the bridal party should know such a request is common. Recent findings indicate that around half of all weddings now have at least one member of the bridal party showing off a baby bump — sometimes it’s even the bride herself. Barring a medical condition, there is no reason a pregnant woman can’t be in the wedding and fulfill her obligations, so feel free to invite that special someone to be in the wedding. There are just a few things to consider to help make it easier on everyone involved. Think over these things. • Gowns: One of the things brides and bridesmaids often fret about is the gown they will be wearing. While nonpregnant members of the bridal party won’t fluctuate much in weight from the day of their first fittings to the wedding day, a pregnant woman is growing with new life within her from the moment of conception. This will have to be taken into consideration. Some maternity designers create bridesmaid dresses for pregnant women, but they may not exactly match the other gowns in mind. Ask the bridal store if alterations can be made to a standard gown, including ordering a much larger size, adding elastic panels or another way to ensure the gown will stretch over a growing belly. Also, be considerate and choose a gown in an empire waist style so that it is flattering for the pregnant bridesmaid. • Shoes: While pregnant, some women’s feet swell. Having strict restrictions on footwear can make a pregnant woman uncomfortable. Low heels or ballerina slippers can be comfortable and fashionable. The other members of the bridal party may also thank you for choosing a sensible shoe. • Breaks: Many activities during the wedding are bound to be tiring. But someone who is pregnant may feel it more than others. Ensure your mama-tobe has ample time to sit and rest. Also, try to have planning meetings near a restroom where she will be comfortable.

• Nonalcoholic drinks: From bachelorette parties to the wedding itself, be sure there are plenty of nonalcoholic and decaffeinated drinks she can enjoy. Pregnant women need to have a lot of water to meet the physical demand of pregnancy as well. • Travel: In the latter months of the pregnancy, many doctors advise against air travel. Spending long hours in a car may be uncomfortable as well. If you were thinking about having the wedding far away, these are things that must be taken into consideration. You may want to revise your plans if your heart is set on having this woman in the bridal party. • Ceremony: It can be tiring for a pregnant woman, especially one in the last trimester, to stand for a long period of time. If you are having a long, religious ceremony, see if a seat can be arranged

so your bridesmaid can sit down when she needs a rest. • Declined invitation: Some pregnant women will jump at the chance to be in the wedding, while others may realize their limitations and prefer to attend only as a guest. Have a another person in mind in case your bridesmaid invitation is declined, and do not hold it against the person if she feels she won’t be able to commit during her pregnancy. • Patience: Although all eyes are generally on the bride on her special day, having a pregnant bridesmaid may garner a share of “oohs and aahs” and attention for her as well. It’s a humble bride who can share her spotlight for a while. And remember, the “something new”at your wedding may be that new baby who is on the way! — Metro

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ver the course of their lifetimes, many people will be wedding guests on several occasions. During the height of wedding season, weddings can run into one another, as the format and the festivities are similar at various ceremonies. Couples interested in setting their nuptials apart may want to enhance the wedding reception with a few unique ideas. Who hasn’t attended a wedding that seems formulaic? The couple enters, they do their spotlight dance, there’s food, a bouquet toss and then the cake cutting. Guests may actually be able to predict what’s coming next. While it is often customary and easy to follow tradition, that doesn’t mean you cannot buck with tradition and offer a few creative ideas to make your event stand out. Here are several ideas you can introduce into your wedding to add something special to the reception. • Skip the big entrance. Those who were kind enough to attend the ceremony have already been introduced to the newly minted happy couple. Instead

of spending the cocktail hour in the isolation of the wedding suite, mingle with your guests from start to finish. So much time is spent posing for pictures or being out of touch with guests, the cocktail hour can be a great time to sit and chat. Being with guests during the cocktail hour means you don’t have to make that big entrance from behind closed doors. Guests will have all eyes on you when you step on the dance floor for your first dance together. • Dance to an upbeat number. Guests are expecting a slow, sappy tune. What they may not expect is an upbeat song that shows you are willing to have a little fun. If you haven’t mastered the waltz but enjoy a little quick step now and again, feel free to choose a tune that shows your excitement and love for each other. • Encourage couples to dance together. It’s often customary for the bridal party to join the bride and groom on the dance floor midway through the first J<< LE@HL< I<:<GK@FE KFL:?<J G8>< (*

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f Michael Buble or Nat King Cole aren’t on your playlists, chances are you may be looking for a first-dance song that’s a little less traditional for your wedding reception. Couples considering a song that’s a little different and speaks to them but won’t necessarily offend the wedding purists in attendance, might want to consider the following tunes: È8cc @ NXek `j PflÉ L) È8dXq`e^É 8\ifjd`k_ È:iXj_É ;Xm\ DXkk_\nj 9Xe[ È:iXqp ]fi PflÉ 8[\c\ È=Xjk\iÉ DXkk EXk_Xejfe È=fi Pfl @ N`ccÉ Dfe`ZX È?\i\ N`k_flk PflÉ * ;ffij ;fne ÈB`jj D\É J`og\eZ\ Efe\ k_\ I`Z_\i È@Ëcc JkXe[ Yp PflÉ K_\ Gi\k\e[\ij ÈCfm\ Jfe^É K_\ :li\ ÈEf Fe\É 8c`Z`X B\pj ÈEfk_`e^ :fdgXi\j kf PflÉ J`e\X[ FË:feefi ÈJl^X Jl^XÉ 9XYp 9Xj_ ÈN`k_flk PflÉ I\ek Jfle[kiXZb ÈPfl NXek kf DXb\ X D\dfipÉ 9fe Afm` — Metro

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any brides anxiously await their opportunity to dance with dear old Dad at their wedding receptions. One of the more beloved wedding traditions, the father-daughter dance is an often touching moment for fathers, new brides and guests alike. Though fathers and their daughters can choose whatever song they'd like for their special dance together, the following are some of the more popular songs for this special event. ÈK_\ NXp Pfl Cffb Kfe`^_kÉ Ç =iXeb J`eXkiX ÈDp >`icÉ Ç K_\ K\dgkXk`fej È@je k J_\ Cfm\cpÉ Ç Jk\m`\ Nfe[\i ÈNfe[\i]lc Kfe`^_kÉ Ç <i`Z :cXgkfe È?Xm\ @ Kfc[ Pfl CXk\cpÉ Ç If[ Jk\nXik È9lkk\iÕp B`jj\jÉ Ç 9fY :Xic`jc\ ÈFm\i K_\ IX`eYfnÉ Ç @jiX\c BXdXbXn`nf fc\ ÈPfl 8i\ Jf 9\Xlk`]lcÉ Ç Af\ :fZb\i ÈLe]fi^\kkXYc\É Ç EXk B`e^ :fc\ È;Xl^_k\ijÉ Ç Af_e DXp\i È=Xk_\i Xe[ ;Xl^_k\iÉ Ç GXlc J`dfe È;Xl^_k\iÉ Ç Cfl[fe NX`eni`^_k ÈCXe[jc`[\É Ç =c\\knff[ DXZ — Metro

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time. If you want to go above and beyond the ordinary, find one thing that you absolutely love and offer that at dance. However, that leaves spouses the party. It could be a flambe presenor significant others waiting in the tation, a chocolate or candy bar, a carvwings while their dates tango with ing station with your all-time favorite groomsmen or bridesmaids. Instead, food (even if that’s PB&J), or a don’t have assigned partners. Rather, carnival-inspired automatic photo encourage your bridal party members booth. to dance with whomever they choose. • Hire a live performer. Although • Swap the garter/bouquet toss for it’s hard to beat the performance something more meaningful. If you’re quality of your wedding song being part of a couple who feels the garter performed by the original artist, unand bouquet toss has become trite, less you’re cousins with Celine Dion, there are other ways to create special chances are she won’t be available to moments in your celebration — ones sing “My Heart Will Go On” at your that don’t single out the singletons who reception. However, a live band adds haven’t yet found their special somea certain level of excitement that a ones. Use this time to present a small disk jockey may not be able to provide. gift or token of your affection to some- Those who are adding a cultural or one on the guest list who has served as ethnic component to their wedding a mentor or source of inspiration. may want to hire a dance troupe or • Choose one special component another type of performer, like a bagas an extra goodie for guests. Some piper, as an added measure of entercouples feel the more they offer the tainment for guests. better guests will view their wedding. • Let them eat ... cookies? Some Spending more money doesn’t necespeople just don’t like cake. Theresarily mean guests will have a better fore, why should a couple have to cut a seven-tiered white confection? Towers of different types of treats can be created from just about anything and serve as the perfect backdrop for that classic cake-cutting photo. A pyramid of cream puffs, stacks of brownies, a cookie castle, or cereal-cake concoctions can work. Some bakeries will decorate a “dummy” styrofoam cake, and then you can serve apple pie a la mode, if you desire. • Stage a costume switch. Let’s face it, dancing all night in a long gown takes some stamina. As the bride, have a more comfortable cocktail dress available to switch into for the latter part of the reception. It will also add some variety to your wedding photos. — Metro =IFD G8>< ()

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Feed 0n these N<;;@E> =8MFI ideas ; o you have a shelf or cabinet that’s filled to the brim with wedding favors such as engraved ice cream scoopers, cake servers, cheese spreaders or tea light candle holders? If you do, you’re not alone. As couples pore over guest favor options, many select trinkets or knickknacks that, while thoughtful, end up collecting dust in someone’s home. Edible gifts also can be thoughtful — and flavorful! Guests may look forward to an edible favor because it’s a memento of the special occasion and it won’t become a permanent fixture in their homes. There are many edible favors from which to choose. They can also be customized according to the theme of the wedding.

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Chocolate It’s difficult to find an edible favor more universally beloved than chocolate. Rich and inviting, chocolate has long been given as a symbol of love and devotion. Chocolate candies and baked goods can work well for wedding favors, provided the favors are refrigerated to avoid melting. Ideas for chocolate favors include individually packaged truffles, gourmet brownie bites, candycovered chocolates with an inscription, chocolate covered apples, chocolate coins, and other similar creations. Chocolate molded designs (much like those chocolate Easter bunnies) are another idea.

Cookies

Sweet cookies also make good edible favors. Butter cookies are a favorite because they are sturdy enough to cut into different shapes. Professionally iced, these cookies can be a masterpiece to behold. Some couples opt for customized fortune cookies that express personalized sentiments to guests.

Make-your-own Sometimes it’s less expensive to give guests kits that they can take home to create their own edible treasures. Options abound and can include everything from personalized packets of hot chocolate to tea bags. Other couples choose among mixes for making cookies or cakes.

Candies It has become popular to have a self-serve candy bar at many weddings. Guests are invited to step up to the display and serve themselves from a series of different confections. Autumn weddings could have Halloween-inspired candies or those in fall hues. It’s easy to follow a color theme when you have a bevy of different candies at your disposal. Many discount stores sell inexpensive jars and candy dishes to house the candy. Designer Chinese takeout-type containers are available from craft stores and can be the perfect way for guests to make that candy portable.

Other edibles From cupcakes to maple syrup to personalized bottles of barbecue sauce, couples have so many options for guest favors at their disposal. — Metro

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espite the months of planning and poring over every minute detail of a wedding, it has often been said that what people remember most about wedding receptions is the food and if they had fun. Therefore, instead of worrying about choosing Jordan almonds over chocolate truffles, or whether the cake should have an extra tier, couples may want to pay more attention to selecting their reception menus. Although certain foods are wedding staples, it could pay for couples to think with their stomachs instead of their heads when selecting wedding day fare. Having a selection of foods that taste as good as they look is a wise idea over having certain foods simply because they are trendy. Whether you are cooking yourself, having a family member serve as chef or relying on the menu of the reception hall, think about foods that will please guests and select those items, regardless of them being fancy. Here are some other tips. • You want foods to be filling but not so much so that guests have to waddle to the dance floor. If you’re planning on several courses, keep portion sizes small to offer a taste of the different items offered. • Classic foods can work well as wedding fare. Roasts, barbecued meats and favorite pasta dishes can make guests feel like they’re dining at someone’s home and not at a wedding. • Choose items people have heard of. Instead of tornadoes of beef, select

a hearty prime rib. Just because a dish sounds fancy doesn’t make it taste better. If a guest doesn’t know what he or she is eating, it can be uncomfortable. Now is not the time to experiment with exotic foods, either. Otherwise, some picky eaters may be left hungry. • Think about the foods you love and see if they can be incorporated at the wedding. Although a breakfast bar at an evening event may seem funny, waffles and omelets may appeal to a greater number of guests than a gourmet fish creation. • Don’t make vegetarians an afterthought. Too often, vegetarians must eat whatever the kitchen can pull together, which is usually a compilation of the vegetable garnishes from the meat dishes. Make an effort to have a true vegetarian dish that is intricate and delicious. • Mashed potatoes are a crowd pleaser. Serve little portions of mashed potatoes in cocktail glasses and enable guests to top as they see fit with bacon bits, cheese or chives. • No idea is silly, and serving any type of food in a hors d’oeuvre style can make it acceptable at a formal affair, whether that food is pizza or caviartopped crackers. • If you have a favorite restaurant that serves delicious food, find out if they will cater your wedding. • Just because it isn’t on the menu doesn’t mean it cannot be prepared. Talk to the catering manager and let him or her know your preferences.

Provided you’re willing to pay a little more, there’s a good chance you can have items that aren’t on the standard catering menu. • Think outside the box for your cocktail hour “bars.” A bread bar, a dipping station, milk and cookies service, or vegetable bar are options that go

against the standard cheese and pasta stations. Although it’s your wedding, ultimately the goal is to please the guests. By choosing foods they will love and rave about, you’re guaranteed positive remarks on your wedding. — Metro

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ouples often fret over what to serve their guests at the reception, and rightfully so. Reception costs can comprise a majority of the wedding-day budget. When spending $100 or more per guest, you want to ensure you’re getting what you paid for and that guests enjoy what they’re eating. Filet mignon may be a good choice, but steak tartare is probably best avoided. Find out which foods to avoid serving your wedding guests. • Exotic cuisine:You may be a risk taker when it comes to cuisine, but others may not share your zeal for exotic foods. Now is not the time to introduce guests to the wild and wacky. If you’ve seen an exotic dish on the Food Network or the Travel Channel, give it a try another time. • Anything on fire: Why risk an accident for a spectacle? Baked alaska, cherries jubilee, apples

flambe ... these are foods that might provide a show, sort of food. Be sure to have some butler-passed hors but the cost of that show may not be worth it in the d’oeuvres or some well-placed pickings for guests to end. grab while mingling. After all, they will need some• Raw food: Clams on the halfshell or sushi-grade thing to provide the energy to mingle and dance, and tuna may seem like good ideas, but keep in mind that food can help buffer the effects of too many cocktails. it is hard to ensure quality when feeding 200 people — Metro at the same time. Foods that require special refrigeration or immediate service for freshness are best WEDDING SPECIALISTS left for other occasions. Don’t risk food poisoning on Interactive & Professional DJs a room full of people unless you want your wedding Extensive Music Library to be remembered for stomach cramps. Over 20 Yrs Experience • A long, sit-down meal: Two or three courses is Free Music Preview fine, but if guests have to sit through a never-ending Dance Coaching for Bride & Groom First Dance parade of courses, that limits their ability to mingle Private & Group Dance Lessons Available for Any Occasion and have a good time. WE PLAY IT YOUR WAY • Anything too elaborate: The faster servers can HOLLIDAY DJs get food out to guests the better. If they have to sit 760-246-8095 there piping mashed potato roses on dishes or hollidaydiscjockey@yahoo.com assemble intricate canapes, the delay might not be worth the presentation. And remember, the more bells and whistles, the higher the price tag. • Fast food: This is your wedding, and you want the food to fit with the scale of the day. A formal wedding generally includes a formal meal. s Birthday Party Although it may be alright to include some fast s Anniversary Party food inspired dishes at the cocktail buffet, steer s Training Class clear of burgers and fries s Board Meeting for the main meal. • Themed food: Don’t dye that baked potato purple because you want the wedding to be a plum-colored affair. Also, it’s best to avoid themed food, unless it is part of a cultural wedding or can be pulled off with class. It’s much easier to pass off crepes and croissants for a Parisian wedding than giant turkey legs and tankards of ale for a 60-120 persons Renaissance-themed one. [Outside catering OK] • No food at all: Whether your wedding $UNIA 2OAD s 6ICTORVILLE is small or grand in scale, s WWW HAWTHORN COM 760-949-4700 guests will expect some

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n an effort to create a once-in-a-lifetime event that is remembered by all in attendance, many couples will admit to going a tad overboard with their weddings. From ultra-stretch limousines to bachelor/bachelorette parties in Las Vegas to course after course of food and beverages, some weddings are a lesson in excess. When the party has winded down, conscious couples can ensure that some of the excesses of the wedding get repurposed for good use. And that begins with the food. Many wedding caterers, in an effort to ensure no guest goes without their fair share of food, grossly overestimate the amount of food needed for the reception. That means there may be plenty of appetizers and main courses leftover, all of which couples have paid for. There are a number of ways that food can be saved and given to others. • Create classy take-homepackages. People have become much

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less averse to taking home food they cannot finish from restaurants. As portion sizes continue to grow, taking a portion home to enjoy later is both cost-conscious and a healthy idea. While a wedding may be a formal event, it shouldn’t preclude guests from feeling comfortable taking home any uneaten food, particularly if they like the food. Provide the reception center with decorative to-go boxes or containers that can be used to package any food guests want to take home with them. Small, handled paper or fabric tote bags will make the leftovers that much more portable. • Donate leftover food. Neighborhood food banks may be willing to accept food donations from your wedding. Although many deal with only nonperishable foods, some will pick up both. Before the wedding you can inquire J<< C<=KFM<IJ G8>< )*

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The decision to hire a videographer is one such area couples fret over. After all, with a photographer snapping hundreds of pictures, having a video may seem like an unnecessary luxury. However, people often find that having a wedding video to cherish long after the day has passed is well worth the price. There are several advantages to hiring a professional videographer to capture the day. A professionally produced wedding video is not the same as Uncle Fred carrying around his archaic camcorder and catching a few embarrassing dance moves during the reception. A professional video will showcase all moments of the wedding from perspectives not easily captured by photography. In addition to showcasing the images of the wedding, the video will also share the sounds and emotions of the day. Here are some things to think about. • Choose a videographer who will work in conjunction with the wedding mood and parameters. You probably don’t want a videographer who uses bright lights that can be distracting. Nor do you want a videographer who pushes the camera in guests’ faces for a less-than-candid interview. Today’s professionals are inconspicuous and simply record the events as they unfold. • The videographer often works in tandem with the photographer. Some photographers have a videographer on staff. But it is fine to bring in your own if you like the quality of the photographer’s photos but not the videographer’s work. • A videographer will capture the things you may have missed during the busy day. He or she can serve as the

eyes and ears for the things you’re not seeing and hearing. • Although ours is an increasingly digital world where people capture photos and videos on their smartphones and other devices on a regular basis, a wedding video can serve as a family memento. What other time, apart from the holidays, do you have all of your friends and loved ones together in one place? • Although no one wants to think of a friend or relative passing away while planning their wedding, the fact remains that after a few years some of the people who attended your wedding may no longer be around. Having a wedding video may be the only last moving image and sound of a special person who is no longer in your life. • Sound is a portion of the wedding that photos simply cannot capture. To relive the music and the words of the day, a videographer is a necessity. Professionals who use wireless microphones will produce a video with the best sound quality. • You can work with a good videographer so it’s not simply a video with close-up shots of your face or unflattering perspectives. Talk about your preferences and even fears about being filmed (some people just don’t like watching themselves on TV), and the videographer can no doubt find solutions that will accommodate your needs. • There are many things that you will not see at the wedding but may have liked to, such as the first gasps of wonder upon guests walking into the reception room, or the tears on the face of an aunt who was sitting too far back in the church pews. This is where a wedding video can prove invaluable. • Modern videographers offer highresolution, edited movies. These can be delivered via Blu Ray DVD and ensure the best quality for your package. Although brides and grooms may be cutting costs with regard to their wedding, they may not want to pass on the wedding video. — Metro

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hen basking in the afterglow of a momentous wedding, most couples would rather think about scores of other things than packing for their honeymoons. But with ever-changing restrictions on what and how much a person can bring along on airlines and other modes of travel, packing is something that eventually must be done. According to the Honeymoon Study 2010 by The Wedding Report, a Wedding Statistics and Market Research organization, 81 percent of newly married couples take a honeymoon. The top honeymoon

destination for those in North America is the Caribbean, where the average couple will spend $3,500 on their honeymoon. Although 15 percent choose to cruise to their destinations, the remaining likely drive or fly. In any case, packing becomes a part of the honeymoon planning. Some people are good at packing and can execute the task rather easily. Others are left with a bulging suitcase that won’t pass muster at security clearance or meet size and weight guidelines imposed by airlines. Nevertheless, anyone can become a packing pro with a few guidelines. • If you don’t already have a suitcase, choose a design with a hard case. This way it won’t expand while packing, and there’s no chance it will ever exceed the size limits. • Roll clothes because it will limit wrinkling. • Use a layering technique to fit a multitude of items and protect against displacement during transit. - Fill the bottom of the suitcase with the heavier items: shoes, jeans, jackets, and any gear or tech items. - Next, layer dresses and slacks so they lay lengthwise on top of the first layer of items. It’s okay if the ends extend over the edge of the suitcase. - Shirts and sweaters (if applicable) can be rolled and then layered next. Use any overhanging slacks and dresses to fold over the shirts and keep them in place. - Lightweight items, like lingerie and undergarments, can be placed on top. Also, include toiletries that are sealed in leakproof bags. • Be sure to know airline requirements in advance. While some restrictions have been lifted, the Traffic Safety Administration and the airlines themselves may have rules regard-

ing how much liquid or sharp items you can bring along. • Keep important documents, such as tickets, reservation numbers and emergency contacts, with you in a travel bag. Any prescriptions you need should be carried as well. • Place an emergency outfit in your carry-on in the event your luggage is lost or temporarily detained. • Consider packing lightly and buying some necessities at your destination. • Sometimes it is less expensive to ship items instead of paying airline baggage fees. Investigate these options, especially on the return trip. • Take advantage of laundry service on honeymoons so you won’t return with a bag full of dirty items that need laundering right away. Also, doing laundry on your trip limits the number of things you need to pack because you can wash and rewear. • Make the most of the honeymoon by packing early. Come your travel day, you can simply hop in the car and look forward to the vacation ahead. — Metro

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fter the thrill of wedding festivities dies down, couples often jet off to a honeymoon retreat and begin an entirely different adventure. The honeymoon may create mixed feelings, some concerning the chance to spend time alone after months of planning and a few feelings of anxiety over spending the first night together as a married couple. For many couples, the honeymoon wedding night is the first time they are intimate together or it holds a special meaning of being intimate for the first time after being married. Such significance can put pressure on a happy and natural experience. Wedding jitters are normal, as are honeymoon and wedding night jitters. But just as wedding trends have changed through the years, so, too, have beliefs about the wedding night. Knowing about shifting trends can alleviate some of the nervousness. According to a recent survey from Brides magazine, one in three brides plan to get into bed on the wedding night and ... sleep. After all of the hoopla of planning and enjoying the wedding, most people are exhausted.

Origins of the term ‘honeymoon’

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Others say they plan to stay up and relive moments of the day. Only about half of all couples think they will consummate the marriage on their wedding night. Taking the pressure off of the wedding night means that the rest of the honeymoon may be filled with opportunities to be amorous. But couples may still be filled with expectations for the perfect romantic retreat. Here are some things to think about. • Accept the fact that some wedding nights and honeymoons aren’t exactly what’s pictured in the movies. Don’t try to live up to a Hollywood-inspired ideal or you may be let down when things don’t go your way. In other words, it may rain on your beachside liaison. • A wedding requires a lot of work. Many people find themselves to be physically exhausted afterward. Others find they are so wound up that they cannot relax. When the mind or body is on adrenaline overload

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or completely wiped out, it’s not the ideal situation for romantic endeavors. • Try to make the honeymoon stand apart from other nights by packing nice lingerie or nighttime attire so that the memories will be special. There will be plenty of other times down the road when you’re an old, married couple to hop between the sheets in a ratty college T-shirt. • Pack some candles and mood music, or ask the resort to handle these details for you. These items can help set the scene. • Make sure your packing list includes special toiletries and birth control methods if you’re not ready to start a family so soon after being married. The brands you prefer may be hard to acquire while at some honeymoon locations. — Metro &$123,(6 ‡ /,1(16 ‡ &+$,56 ‡ %%4 *5,//6 ‡ $1' 025(

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discussion and can help you work through things. • Divorce should not be seen as a viable option. Couples who want to bail on the marriage at every turn could be directing their energy toward divorce as the only solution instead of discovering ways to remove the cause of strife. Divorce can sometimes be the easy way out when you think about the work that goes into keeping a marriage working. Experts say that there are a few issues, like adultery, abuse and drug/alcohol addiction, that may be reasonable catalysts for divorce if personal safety and sanity is being compromised. • Make time for romance. It’s easily said but not so easily done. Too often married couples forget what it was like to date when all of their attention was spent on each other instead of the house, kids, work, etc. Today there seems to be even more distractions, from e-mails to texts to pressure and obligations at the office. Happy couples find the time to spend quality time with their spouses — even if that’s only 10 minutes of alone time a day.

• Put “we” first. Many people operate on a “me” mentality. When you’re part of a couple, give more to your spouse than you take. If he or she is doing the same, you’re working collectively for the benefit of the marriage instead of yourselves. • Respect each other. Often couples having troubles realize they treat strangers better than they treat each other. Would use the insults or unflattering terms that you sometimes throw at your spouse with a complete stranger? Probably not. Good marriages are based on a foundation of respect and love. It’s easy to lose feelings of love if the respect is gone. Couples can realize that there are some thorns that come with the roses of marriage, and staying happy together does take work for it to all be worth it. — Metro

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ome might say a long celebrity marriage is one that endures the duration of the newly betrothed’s trip down the aisle. We’ve seen Britney Spears dissolve a marriage after 55 hours and Kim Kardashian call it quits after 72 days. It seems even money can’t buy matrimonial happiness. But some couples have been together for 50, 60 years and say they’re still as much in love as they were the day they spoke their “I dos.” What do they know that others do not? According to clinical psychologist and relationship guru Dr. Phil McGraw, “We all need to be flexible and to compromise in marriage, but you’ve got to be true to your core traits and characteristics, what I call your authentic self.” Some couples enter a relationship projecting a persona they believe the other person wants — one that really isn’t what they’re all about. This could be a woman trying to fill the role of her husband’s nurturing mom or a guy playing the protector to his wife. In reality, marriage is more of a partnership, and truth and trust are often at the basis of good marriages. There are many other “secrets” that marriage experts will offer to couples seeking the magic formula. Whether you’re pondering marriage or have already tied the knot, consider the following advice to make a marriage endure for the long haul. • There’s no such thing as the perfect marriage. Some couples create an image of what they think marriage is supposed to be, and that image that often goes “poof” once reality sets in. Even soulmates are bound to frustrate or irritate one another from time to time. • Couples should express their frustrations. Bottling up frustrations can eat at a person and eventually destroy a marriage. Talking about the things that are bothering you with your partner opens up a

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connection, there’s a good chance you’ll appreciate the photos in the long run. Also, be open to the fact that unplanned rapher, there are certain things couples stops may offer a great background for should keep in mind. The first and most the image. Be open to the unexpected. important is selecting a photographer • Try random poses and some you can relate to. If you don’t feel a candid shots. Although you might have connection with the photographer, he a vision of the perfect photo in your or she will have trouble coaxing the mind, experimenting with different shots that will produce the best results. ideas can sometimes lead to a great He or she photo you should also be really love. a professional Expect to take and have some your share of experience kissing, noseworking with touching and posing couportrait shots. ples. This way But some fun the photos poses, such don’t look stiff as running or or contrived. jumping (or Here are some rolling around other tips that on a beach can lead to full of waves) great photos. can produce • Find a candid shots photograthat are truly pher who fits masterpieces. your style. If Remember, you’re a quirky sometimes couple, go photograwith a quirky phers will photograpose you in pher. If you’re positions that reserved and seem a bit a follow-theawkward, but book type of this is to get couple, then the best lines select a more traditional photographer. of the body and flattering images. Some photographers out there forget • Choose clothing that fits the mood. that this is your moment and want to If time and budget allows, have several impart their idea of what you want. different wardrobe changes so that you Make sure he or she takes your ideas can see which outfits work and which into consideration. ones don’t. A formal outfit, comfort• Select one who is open to differable street clothes, something beachy ent shoot locations and brainstormor clothing that fits with your interests ing. Some of the best photos occur in (such as polo or baseball) can make for natural settings, where things aren’t interesting engagement photos. Avoid entirely planned. If a photographer clothing that is too trendy or busy, simply works out of a studio, you may which may take away from the actual want to select one who has more free images in the long run. Plus, you don’t reign with different locales. want to look back at these photos in the • Choose your location wisely. future and say, “What was Ithinking?” Certain locations will stand out in your Avoid matchy-matchy, though. If you minds because they are visually stunare dressed alike, you may appear to be ning or are special places where you trying too hard. It’s the individual perhave spent moments as a couple. By sonalities you want to shine through. choosing a place that offers a personal — Metro

Ribbon can be added by punching holes into the invite and threading the ribbon through. These may be the most expensive of • Do it all yourself. The truly crafty the DIY invites because a printer is couple can make their invitations from still doing much of the work. scratch. This involves drawing out a • Use wedding invitation kits. Many template, cutting the card stock to stationery shops, craft stores and offit, selecting envelopes, creating and fice supply retailers offer all-in-one kits executing response cards, and decothat can be purchased. These feature rating the invitations as they see fit. a standard design with the accoutreThis will require some tools, includments of that particular design. Most ing scrapbooking or papercrafting will come with envelopes and small supplies. A paper trimmer will help response cards. The couple simply ensure straight cuts, and decorativeuses the template provided to create edged scissors can help hide any small text on a personal computer and then mistakes in the edges. While this may the invite can be run through a home be a cheaper option if couples get good printer. prices on all the paper components, • Mix and match components. it also entails the most work and the Couples who want to be a little more greatest margin of error. hands-on can purchase card stock Saving money on wedding compoand envelopes separately and design nents has become essential for many their own invitations according to couples in this economy. Choosing color scheme. Clip art included with to take on some aspects of invitation some word processing or design creation can help reduce costs and software can embellish invites that personalize the event even more. are then printed on a home printer. — Metro

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eddings and gifts go hand-in-hand. Couples who are tying the knot can expect to receive scores of gifts, ranging from simple wellwishes to cash to items listed on their registries. Because gift-giving is tradition, couples should plan on spending some time writing thank-you notes to express gratitude to the people who were kind enough to give a gift. Contrary to popular belief, couples do not have a year’s grace period to mail

out thank-you notes after the gift has been received or the wedding has taken place. According to the etiquette experts at The Emily Post Institute, all thank-you cards should be written and mailed within three months of receipt of a gift. It is preferable that the thank-you be written directly after receipt of the gift, but time-strapped couples may not have the opportunity to do so. However, writing a few thank-you cards every few days can alleviate having a

giant pile to do later on. Many couples prefer to order thank-you stationery when they order their wedding invitations. This way the paper, font and style match the original invitations. In addition, it may be less expensive to order stationery as a package. In some cases, a photography package may include thank-you notes with wallet-sized photos to include. Couples can then mail out a nice sentiment

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are carefully measured rather than buffet where amounts are estimated. Also, removing extra courses such as dessert or breakfast bars can further keep down the amount of extra food as well as the cost. • Take it home. If you will not be traveling to your honeymoon directly after the wedding reception, you can have the catering staff package the food and you can bring it home. Keep your freezer empty and put the food inside. When you return from your honeymoon you will have plenty of dinners already premade

so you can enjoy life as since they weren’t able to excesses of a wedding can them home with you, you newlyweds. Otherwise, attend the festivities. be put to good use. By can stretch your money you can invite friends There are a number of donating food and other and resources further. over to view honeymoon ways to ensure that the items or simply taking — Metro photos and serve the food as refreshments. • Recycle flowers. <HDUV Food may not be the only item leftover at the end of the night. Guests who may not have taken home favors or centerpieces Come In And Celebrate With us will leave behind many Located Next To Harbor Freight On Hesperia Rd. beautiful items that would normally end up in the 25 years supporting the High Desert’s Special Events trash. Flowers and gifts Businesses while serving the Valley’s Tuxedo needs can be donated to a hosfor Special Occasions and School Events pital or senior center to Tuxedos, Suits and Accessories In Stock! brighten the atmosphere. 6th Tux or Suit FREE (of equal value) Be sure to keep just a few Same Day Service favors available for people who send gifts in the mail We match David’s Bridal colors and many other colors

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within certain organizations to find out which specialize in what area of food collection. Feeding America (feedingamerica. org) has an extensive list of food banks and foodrescue programs available online. Some organizations can pick up food and deliver it within the same day to a soup kitchen. If you cannot find an organization to help, you may actually be able to donate your food to livestock. Some farms and recreational farmers will feed pigs leftover food. This is a way to ensure food will not go to waste. • Help reduce waste. You can speak with your wedding caterer about cutting down on the amount of food without making it overtly noticeable to guests. First, consider a sit-down dinner where portions

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who contributed in some part to the wedding, even if a verbal thanks was =IFD G8>< )* already offered. Anyone who provided an engagewith a photo from the ment, shower or wedding wedding. To keep with the gift, those who gave gifts etiquette time frame of of money, anyone who thank-you notes, it is imhosted a party or shower, portant to find out when attendants in the wedthe thank-you photos and ding, people who may have cards will arrive first from housed wedding guests, the photographer. The parents of the bride and thank-you sentiments groom, suppliers and should not be delayed by vendors, and employers the photographer. who have wished couples For those interested well should all be included in less expensive options, on the thank-you list. preprinted thank-you Here are some other cards can be purchased at guidelines to follow. a stationery store. There • Mail out a handwritare many designs and ten note to each and every price points available. Re- person being thanked. member, it is not the card • Do not use form letitself, but the thank-you ters or preprinted cards that is important. to which you simply add As to the rules regard- your signature. ing those getting a thank• Be sincere in your you, it is just about anyone messages and try to men-

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tion the gift and what it will be used for. • Promptly respond to gifts that were received through the mail so the giver knows they arrived. • Never mention that you plan to return a gift or exchange it. • Mentioning the amount of a monetary gift is optional, but it does confirm to the giver that the right amount was received. • A mass thank-you posted on social media is not adequate. • Even if you are late with writing out thank-you notes, that doesn’t exclude you from doing so. By adhering to thankyou card etiquette, couples will ensure their guests know that gifts and efforts to make the wedding special were appreciated. — Metro

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