Hey, Good Lookin’

By Rebekah Curtis

In ancient times, I went on a work trip to Haiti with my church’s youth group. There was a cultural dress code for girls: long skirts, covered shoulders, and for our beach day, bikinis were out. The girls griped and complained. Who wanted to wear an old lady one-piece? The guy next to me mumbled, “That’s what you should all be wearing anyway.”

“Excuse me?” I demanded.

He sighed. “What if somebody told you that you weren’t supposed to eat any chocolate for ten years? And then they marched all this chocolate in front of you all the time. Is that going to make it easier or harder for you not to want something you’re not supposed to have?”

Ouch. I knew he was thinking of our recent trip to a water park. In dressing for the guys’ attention, we girls had selfishly made it difficult—very difficult— for them to lead a sexually pure and decent life.

Wait a minute though. Aren’t we free in the Gospel? You don’t go to a church where women have to wear long skirts and long hair. It was for freedom that Christ set us free, so who says you can’t wear whatever you want? Martin Luther explains, “This is that Christian liberty, our faith, the effect of which is not that we should be careless or lead a bad life, but that no one should need the law or works for justification and salvation.” Jesus died to forgive you and release you from sin and death. You are free in Christ from the impossible task of saving yourself through the Law. You don’t need to wear a chador, a mantilla, or your great-grandma’s housecoat to earn your heavenly mansion.

Jesus was free of sin and death. After all, He is God. But God is love, and love does not seek its own (I Corinthians 13:5) but the beloved. Great news: you are the beloved. Jesus, seeing your sin and need for forgiveness, surrendered His freedom, humbled Himself, became nothing, and died for you (Philippians 2:7–8) because He loved you. This, says Martin Luther, shows us how Christian love works. “Though [the Christian] is thus free from all works, yet he ought to empty himself of this liberty, take on him the form of a servant...and in every way act towards his neighbor as he sees that God through Christ has acted and is acting towards him. All this he should do freely, and with regard to nothing but the good pleasure of God.” Just as Jesus surrendered His freedom from death for our good, so do Christians exercise freedom humbly for the good of our baptized brothers and sisters.

Limiting your wardrobe is certainly humbling. Girls want to look good, and an easy way to do that is following trends that, for the moment, people consider good-looking. Whether you’re trying to fit in or stand out, it’s tempting to conform when fashions are clingy, strappy, low-cut, high-slit, daring, and baring. But far more important than advertising for Hollister is Christian love, which binds your behavior to your brothers’ needs and asks you to enjoy your freedom where it won’t hurt them. This applies to guys at church (including pastors), guys at school (including teachers), and guys you don’t know (including old guys you don’t know).

In John Donne’s poem “A Hymne to God the Father,” the poet prays, “Wilt Thou forgive that sin which I have won/Others to sin, and made my sin their door?” Female vanity guilefully misnamed “freedom” is a door to male lust. A girl may claim she likes the color of a tight sweater or that the weather mandates spaghetti straps, but no person is free to leave chastity— her own or someone else’s—in a pile on the floor of her closet. Girls, you’re more powerful than you know.Whether you think you’re Minerva or Medusa, regardless of your popularity, guys can’t help noticing you. The way you dress can mean the difference between their respect or lust, greater virtue or darker sin. It costs you less to dress modestly than it costs them for you not to. If you’re not sure about a piece of clothing, ask yourself: Why do I want to wear this? Would I want another girl to wear it around my boyfriend?

So, what to wear instead of the trashy stuff the world tosses over your dressing room door? Start like our mother Sarah with “the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight” (1 Peter 3:4). Add the fear of the Lord (Proverbs 31:30), modesty, and self-control (1 Timothy 2:9), and you’ll really grab attention, because a beautiful soul makes a mysteriously beautiful woman.

Mrs. Rebekah Curtis is the wife of Rev. Heath Curtis.You can e-mail her at rmgcurtis@gmail.com.