RAISING KIDS: MILESTONES YOU MIGHT NOT THINK ABOUT

By Jessica Farthing

When our children are babies, we are so in tune with their milestones. When are they supposed to sit up? When should they walk? After they finish becoming mobile, potty-training and learning to talk, the milestones seem fewer and farther between. Somehow, we lose track of when they should learn independent living skills as they get older. However, to move your child forward toward being a capable adult, the work never ends. Here are some skills that might not get checked at the doctor's office, but are just as important.

LEARNING TO VOLUNTEER

Children are naturally empathetic and love to help others. As a parent, it’s almost never too early to foster this skill. Of course, it’s important to pay attention to age and skill level to pick activities that are right for them. It’s also great to follow their interests to make a volunteer project more compelling for your child. One of the best ways to teach a child that it’s valuable to volunteer is to model that behavior. Making this a family effort shows that you practice what you preach and it will be more likely that your child will take this lesson into adulthood. Another way to teach a child about the gift of giving is to read books that deal with the theme, like the beautiful story of a generous tree, “The Giving Tree” by Shel Silverstein.

MANAGING MONEY

Julia Taylor had debt from her master’s degree and vowed that her daughters would learn to live free of borrowed money. She knew she had to make spending realistic for her oldest daughter, “Kate and I had a lot of conversations on how to handle money. I gave her a little notebook to keep track of her allowance. She wrote down what she spent and what she planned to spend it on. I required her to have charitable giving and savings. She still does it at 21 years old. She keeps track of every penny and checks her bank account everyday.”

Julia was so successful in teaching this lesson that Kate managed to budget out scholarship money in a year abroad in China with very little input. She says, “She has a two-year plan at all times.”

Professionals like Dave Ramsey agree with Julia starting so early to teach fiscal responsibility. His suggestions usually involve showing rather than telling kids how much things cost. A visual representation can show a child realistically what spending means.

FOLLOWING DIRECTIONS TO AN ADDRESS

Kids are usually more competent with their phones than their parents are, but every now and then there is somewhere that might not be on a GPS. Does your child know how to read a map? It seems silly, but map-reading helps children develop spatial reasoning. These skills include shape, size, and trajectory of objects, using information to make a decision and manipulate. Maps are cool, too! They’re chock full of symbols and the possibility of different environments and worlds. Make a treasure hunt with map clues or play with a compass. Your child’s math skills will benefit.

Even though you might have made it through the early milestones of childrearing, parenting is a never-ending joy. Exploring adult skills make your children happy and independent, leading to welladjusted adulthood. PIQ

Jessica Farthing is a Savannah-based freelance writer and mom of three. She often looks at her children who are almost grown and wonders how it happened so fast!