Timeless Truths ................................................................Pages

Faces of Grief

When Grief becomes Debilitating

The past five years have been filled with loss. I've had to say goodbye to loved ones and fur babies, and with that came a drastic change to the life that I knew and loved. Grief is a personal response to loss, and it is a process, which doesn't begin at the end of life, but rather, in small steps along the way. Take for instance, when my late husband became ill before he was even diagnosed with esophageal cancer. We were already experiencing a change in our relationship whereas we were not able to do and enjoy the things we always did due to the pain and discomfort he felt. As the disease progressed, our husband-wife relationship changed into that of a patient-caregiver. The sickening nausea that plagued him made it practically impossible for me to kiss and hug my loved one because everything made him feel ill. When the pain became more intense, he was unable to lie down in our bed any longer. I was already feeling the loss of the security I cherished as a loved and cared for wife. My profound sadness and sense of dread of the inevitable, and the thought of having to carry on without him

was overwhelming. It drove me to my knees time and time again, crying out to God in despair, begging Him to heal my husband and take all of this pain away. On April 19, 2017, at 10:15 p.m., my dear husband passed away, but nine days before he died, he gave his life to the Lord. I realized that God really did answer my prayers, as He healed him for eternity. Archie is now safe in the arms of our Lord and Savior. Even though, at times the grief was debilitating, I was able to move on with the assurance that Archie was free from suffering in this world and the next. After about a month, I tried to resume my

everyday life by going back to work part time, reading and spending less time by myself. It is true that many people experience different emotions during the grieving process, including denial, anger, anxiety and depression. They may also experience weight and appetite changes, as I did, sleeplessness, and muscle tension. Sometimes, it's hard to know how to best support someone who is grieving, since we deal with grief differently and there are so many faces to grief. What do you say, or what do you do to try to help someone in their loss? One grieving person may withdraw from social interactions and want to spend more time alone, while another may try to stay active and need someone to just be there to listen to them. The best thing that you can probably do for someone is to be present and listen. Most of the time, they are not looking for advice; they simply want someone to listen. Just remember that grief is a process and there is no timeline to get through it. In Matthew 11, God tell us, "Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." God can provide that rest through a friend who can help through the grief, but mostly through the peace that only He can give to help you through the healing process. We all long for peace, for internal peace in our hearts. Jesus cares about our individual peace. Paul describes the peace that the Prince of Peace, Jesus Christ brings...a peace that surpasses all understanding. Philippians 4:6-7 says,

Faces of Grief

"Be anxious for nothing, but by everything in prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God, and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." Once we have peace with God, we receive peace from God. But the best peace of all is the peace of God. The peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Even though the circumstances around us may be utter chaos, do you have that inner peace? No matter what problems or frustrations are in your life, do you have that quiet peace that keeps you going in the right direction? Jesus guards our hearts in a way that the human heart cannot fathom. The Holy Spirit will come and abide in the heart of every single person who trusts in God. You will feel that quiet peace in the middle of the night when you're lying in your bed, wide awake, staring at the ceiling. John 14:27 says, "Peace I leave with you, my peace I give to you, not as the world gives do I give to you, let not your heart be troubled, nor let it be afraid." In every instance, in every situation, peace is our promise from the Lord. The Bible is the key to our peace. Turning to the Bible's timeless wisdom helps with the healing process. The Peace of God guards our hearts on the outside, but the God of Peace dwells in our hearts, keeping us calm. If you don't have Christ, you don't have peace, but if you have Christ, you have peace. Jesus is all we need. He is enough. Keep your eyes on Him. He is the source of all peace. God comforts us and will never abandon us in our darkest moments. He will always provide us with love and hope. In heaven, there will be no pain, no sorrow and no death. All grief will be gone and we will only feel God's unending love. Don't let your emotions consume you. Let your sorrow wash over you like a river. Give in to your feelings, for God is guiding you through your journey. We may feel lost and confused during these painful times, but remember, God has a reason and a plan for everything.

"When He gives quietness, who then can bring trouble?" (Job 34:29)

WOOD Ministries