All over the country, at this moment, people are sharing a meal: breakfast, lunch, dinner, snacks, happy hour, coffee, and drinks. Through the act of eating together, they are building and reinforcing relationships, sharing ideas, celebrating, worshipping and gathering. Families tell each other about their day. Colleagues talk shop and hash out ideas. Couples share each other’s’ intimate secrets. Teams celebrate victories or cheer up each other over a loss.
No matter the reason, there is something communal about shared meals. Across cultures, religions, regions, and background, meals are a unifying factor. No matter the culture or ethnicity, people gather around food for reasons that have more to do with community rather than just the simply
consuming nourishment. It’s not just about eating; it’s about building the foundation for our families, communities and cultures. When people think about various cultures, food is such an important aspect of that.
Meals are a part of all stages of our lives. From the food we feed expectant mothers to the celebrations meals after the birth of a child. Food is involved in all manner of rituals from birth to coming of age; marriage to death. Even in mourning, we feast to console ourselves over our loss. Meals bring together people who seldom see each other. Think of all the relatives and friends that you only see
during the holidays. Thanksgiving is a time when people come from great distances to eat turkey together. Parties are an excuse to gather using food as a way to get people to attend. It’s a joyous time and occasion where our differences seem to be cast aside. We are jovial and carefree. It’s as if all differences are cast aside, even for just this short moment in time. Some of my happiest moments and cherished memories are around food and celebrations. I have fond remembrances of childhood birthday parties, Thanksgiving meals and Christmas dinners. As I recall these thoughts, it brings a smile to my face.
In sharp contrast, when I think of the state of division and polarity America is experiencing right now, I am pained. Our society seems deeply divided by fear, racism, intolerance and hatred. Lines have been drawn and people are entrenched in their ideals and beliefs. Compromise is scarce. People have an all or nothing attitude. It’s “us versus them�.
This division seems overwhelming. No one is listening to comprehend, but to find a counter argument. We are no longer individuals, but labels: Democrats, Republicans, conservative, liberal, rich, poor, immigrant, white, black, Asian, Hispanic, Jew, Muslim, and Christian.
I fear that the division is so vast that there is no repairing this rift. However, I refuse to give up hope. Americans have withstood division in the past and overcame it. At our core, I think, at heart, Americans are good people. I have seen their noble nature come out in times of crisis and disaster. Right now, our country is facing a great social challenge. Rather than wait to see how things will unfold, we should do what we can to bring about understanding and comprehension. It is up to us to act to bring about meaningful dialogue and change.
When I see people in conflict, I jokingly think, “There’s nothing that a good meal can’t resolve.” Yes, I do think this in jest. But, as they say, anything said in jest is also part serious. If meals have a way of bringing together and unifying groups, families and communities, why can’t it bring together opposing sides?
Growing up in the San Francisco Bay Area, I had a liberal upbringing with friends of various races, ethnicities and religions. I am a Democrat with ideas that lean heavily on the side of social justice and looking out for one another. Being a female, I am a champion of women’s rights and our ability to choose what happens to our bodies.
However, I know that there are so many other points of view that are similar as well as vastly different from mine. I feel that one way to bring about understanding and empathy is to challenge ourselves to step out of our comfort zones and interact with those whose ideas may be vastly different from ours. It is through these one on one interactions and exchange than we can start bridging these gaps that create that chasms that separate us.
I would like to travel to different parts and regions of the United States to seek out people whose ideas, upbringings, political affiliations are in stark contrast to mine. I want to meet individuals, couples and families from urban, suburban and rural communities. I would like to interact with those of different faiths and belief systems. I’d like share a meal with them and get to know their stories, history, background, beliefs and traditions. I want to listen to truly comprehend and not just to reply. I want to discover what common ties bind us and how to overcome the differences that might divide us.
My desired destinations would be:
New York City, NY
Salt Lake City, UT
Dallas, TX
Charleston, WV
I hope that in the process of actively listening and understanding their point of view, that it will broaden mine as well. Through comprehension, I’d like to build empathy and understand our similarities, rather than focus on our differences. It is also my hope that they are able to learn from me as much as I learn from them. Then, we can take our newfound understanding and share that with our communities, families and friends.
TAKE AWAY
How does HMC benefit from this experience? As our company grows, we will face the challenges of managing a diverse work force.
How do create communication channels across all levels of the company? How can we break down the walls that separate us into practices and locations? How do we manage conflict? How do we facilitate change management? I hope that the lessons I learn from my travels and experiences will help answer these questions. I would like to sit down, share a meal and have honest conversations with leadership and my colleagues about what we can do to bridge existing gaps and navigate the road ahead so that we all benefit from our shared experience.
How will we encourage dialogue from various points of view? How will we inspire inclusion? How do we ensure that we are aware of the needs of our changing workforce?