Honi Soit Week 13 Semester 1 2012

HONISOIT

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Week Thirteen June 6

LifeChoice: the good, the bad; the debate

Gun control: weapons of mass destruction

OPINION

FEATURE

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Cannes: Honi’s round-up of the best films 11

CULTURE

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Contents This Week

8 10 11

11 3

Spam

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Campus

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Third Drawer

Want the best bog or perfect piss?

Luke Dassarklis ranks Sydney Uni’s top five toilets

Taboo

Our resident hedonist Ludwig Schmidt gets frisky, with consequences

The Gun Show

It’s the world’s most popular weapon of mass destruction. And most years they kill more people than the atomic bomb.

By Ben Brooks

14 Culture Vulture

Editor in Chief: James O’Doherty Editors: James Alexander, Hannah Bruce, Bebe D’Souza, Paul Ellis, Jack Gow, Michael Koziol, Rosie Marks-Smith, Kira Spucys-Tahar, Richard Withers, Connie Ye Reporters: Gareth Austin, Ben Brooks, Christopher J. Browne, Adam Chalmers, Kade Denton, Fabian Di Lizia, Eleanor Gordon-Smith, Flora Grant, Raihana Haidary, Neha Kasbekar, Brad Mariano, Patrick Morrow, Felicity Nelson, Lane Sainty, Michaela Upton, Joseph Wang Contributors: Tenaya Alattas, Danielle Chiaverini, Luke Dassarklis, James Evans, Abigail McCarthy, Elliot Nolan Crossword: Ghoti Cover: James O’Doherty Advertising: Amanda LeMay and Rebecca Murr publications.manager@src.usyd.edu.au

TWITTER: @ HONI_SOIT

Hipster, moi? Raihana Haidary finds a serious use for Instagram

What do Sydney Uni students do on a Friday night? Write angry letters to Honi Soit

What really happened when a “pro-life” club was rejected by the C&S Committee?

Adam Chalmers reports

News Review

Elliot Nolan celebrates the Diamond Jubilee and Lane Sainty reports on the battle over water in rural NSW

7 Op-Shop

The politics of abortion are too often ruled by intuition and mindless precedent, writes Eleanor Gordon-Smith

16 Tech & Online

Christopher J. Browne walks you through Spotify, while Justin Wang reports on the growth of Kickstarter

17 Action-Reaction

London’s calling for Sydney University athletes, writes Kira Spucys-Tahar

18 SRC Pages 21 Lecture Notes 22 Sandstone Report

Please read them. Just this once

We wish Damo ‘Donger’ Thomson and Tracy a fruitful semester break

Planner WED SASS Scavenger Hunt 10am-4pm, Manning House, $5, $6, $10

What better way than taking a few hours off to join SASS in their end of semester Scavenger Hunt! With crazy photo challenges, prizes and free drinks at the end!

Sydney Film Festival 6th-17th June, Various, $15

The first ever Sydney Film Festival was held in 1954 in four halls in our very own Sydney Uni. Since then it has grown to become truly amazing and awesome, so make sure you check it out!

Transit of Venus

Venus will be passing between Earth and the Sun for the last time until 2117. The best viewing opportunity is at 11:30am, but don’t look straight at the sun. Seriously

Disclaimer: Honi Soit is published by the Students’ Representative Council, University of Sydney, Level 1 Wentworth Building, City Road, University of Sydney, NSW, 2006. The SRC’s operation costs, space and administrative support are financed by the University of Sydney. The editors of Honi Soit and the SRC acknowledge the traditional owners of this land, the Gadigal people of the Eora nation. Honi Soit is written, printed, and distributed on Aboriginal land. Honi Soit is printed under the auspices of the SRC’s directors of student publications: Rafi Alam, Peta Borella, Michael de Waal, Eleanor Gordon-Smith, Jeremy Leith, Leo Nelson, Astha Rajvanshi and Max Schintler. All expressions are published on the basis that they are not to be regarded as the opinions of the SRC unless specifically stated. The Council accepts no responsibility for the accuracy of any of the opinions or information contained within this newspaper, nor does it endorse any of the advertisements and insertions. Printed by MPD, Unit E1 46-62 Maddox St. Alexandria NSW 2015.

Honi’s Guide to what’s on THU

FRI

Kicks Club IGM 11:30am, Manning, FREE

Brendan Mclean

Come along to the IGM of Kicks Club, a new sports publication starting next semester, and get involved in USyd’s next big publication! (Eds. After Honi)

STC Wharf sessions invites Triple J presenter Brendan Mclean to entertain you with his own pop-meets-folk tunes.

He is also appearing in Baz Luhrmann’s The Great Gatsby, so catch him before he becomes more super famous.

End of Semester Paty - Beat the System 4pm, Hermann’s Bar, FREE Featuring Softwar, Lime Cordiale and Sydney Uni electronic duo Movement! They are also giving away a free VESPA scooter!!!!!

Salt. Launch Party 8pm, The Village, Potts Point, $10, $5 Salt. is a new collective embracing the finest in Art, Fashion and Music to produce truly unique events.

SU N

SAT

This is our final issue for semester one. But you can email us and follow us on Twitter over the break. Exciting things will soon be One of the coolest happening at: things you’ll never see www.honisoit.com

9pm, Sydney Theatre Company, FREE

Truck Stop 11am and 7:30pm, Seymour Centre, $35 Based on fact, Truck Stop was commissioned by the Q Theatre Company and developed with senior students in Penrith and Mt Druitt. An important, funny and confronting work that shines the headlights on gender, teenage culture and growing up.

TUE

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Rosings Hight Tea - Usyd Darcy Society 1pm, The Victoria Room, $25, $30, $38

Missy Higgins

A Little Lunch Music

7:30pm, Seymour Centre, $65

Tues, 12:30pm, $15

You have been cordially invited by Lady Catherine de Bough for a sumptuous high tea. However places are limited so please RSVP at your earliest convenience.

After her acting debut in 2010 in the awesome Bran Nue Dae, Missy Higgins is touring her long awaited third album, ‘The Ol’ Razzle Dazzle’.

Leading members of the Sydney Symphony form Australia’s premiere wind quintet and present a gorgeous program of favourites with Kathryn Selby.

Wolfwolf

Bites After Work Storytelling Tues, 6:30pm, Newtown Library, FREE

Darling Harbour Blues and Jazz Festival 9th-11th June, Darling Harbour, FREE Featuring homegrown and international talents such as James Morrison, Fuji Collective and Moth. Plus Sydney’s famous fireworks display.

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O P i cukr

8pm, Gallery Bar, Oxford Arts, FREE Brisbane’s mysterious purveyor of live future-funk will strut his stuff for free, supported by Abillion.

@honi_soit

For anyone interested in writing short stories, this is a great opportunity to workshop your ideas with professional storytellers Campfire Collective.

Spam Letters Vilifying colleges won’t cause change Sam Molloy Int’l and Global Studies III

You may have noticed that St Paul’s College has copped a fair bit of flak in the last few years, most recently in relation to the allegedly racist theme of the Jazz and Dinner Dance (JDD) held two weeks ago (“‘British Raj’ beyond bad taste”, May 30). What rarely gets discussed though, is whether that criticism is useful in bringing about productive change within the college.

I’ve lived at St Paul’s for three years now and have seen how other residents react to various criticisms levelled at the college. So for anybody interested in changing the culture that exists in the colleges at the University of Sydney, consider the following some free advice.

If you couldn’t tell by the tone of the articles published in Honi last week or the Facebook group set up by the SRC Welfare Officer Rafi Alam demanding that the college apologise and the SRC condemn the event, current criticism is focused on using external pressure to try to change the college. There is obviously a place for this kind of criticism, and if Mr McCann and Mr Alam think that the JDD had a racist theme, of course they should speak up about it. The problem is the way they are choosing to do so.

I really hope it doesn’t come as a big surprise to Mr McCann that if you call people “racist, sexist trust-fund kids” they tend to become less willing to follow your subsequent advice to “voice your opinion amongst your peers”. It may have made Mr McCann feel like a better person for categorically slandering everyone who lives at St Paul’s (and making some pretty serious factual errors along the way), but I can guarantee him that the moment he did so, everybody stopped listening to him.

People tend not to like being insulted and then told what to do.

Ditto Mr Alam, who recently published a flyer for a fake party at St Paul’s lampooning college residents as racist, misogynistic idiots. It may have seemed humorous to Mr Alam to include such witty advice in the dress code as “Gals: Shutup and drink”, but by slandering the entire college, he simply managed to make his views seem like a bad joke rather than a more serious complaint.

Worse than delegitimising their own views though, Mr McCann and Mr Alam managed to severely harm the chance of anyone within the college also speaking up if they felt offended. By lumping all residents together and then creating a ridiculous, vilifying caricature of them, it made it substantially harder for anyone to associate themselves with those opinions without also looking like a fool. The irony of calling on likeminded residents to voice their opinion among their peers is that Mr McCann and Mr Alam were the ones who made it so much harder to do so and still be taken seriously.

If people like Mr McCann and Mr Alam are genuinely interested in creating positive change within the colleges and not simply in pursuing a vendetta, they would do a lot better by respectfully displaying their outrage and trying to engage college residents instead of vilifying them. Using external

pressure can be useful, but not at the cost of harming voices within St Paul’s who want to see the same change.

There are a lot of ways in which the culture at the colleges could change for the better, but if we’re serious about doing that, the tone of the conversation needs to change.

All views expressed are my own and not necessarily the views of other college residents or the college itself.

St Paul’s Responds Hugo Rourke Eng/Com IV Dear Honi, Allow me first to respond to the illinformed allegations levelled at St Paul’s College, and correct the glaring mistakes contained within the last edition of Honi Soit (‘British Raj beyond Bad Taste’, Mason McCann; Honileaks).

First, waiters at the event were longstanding employees of the College’s catering company, Sodexho, and come from a variety of backgrounds (Indian, Sri Lankan, Pakistani, European and Anglo-Saxon). Some of the staff requested to wear traditional national attire as an opportunity to showcase their cultures. The College organisers agreed but left that choice to each staff member’s discretion. The reported request for a Pakistani employee to wear a turban is entirely false. The particular theme was chosen as an opportunity to draw on both British and Indian elements as a backdrop for the evening. An “End of the British Raj” theme does not endorse Colonialism, just as a “Prohibition Era” party doesn’t celebrate gang violence, bootlegging or racketeering.

Mr McCann’s thinly veiled threat to undermine our right-of-reply is unacceptable. Now that the true details of the organisation of the JDD are apparent, the event was neither a joke nor the work of a few bad apples. It was a successful event, held in good taste and enjoyed by attendees and employees alike.

Hugo Rourke is the St Paul’s College Senior Student.

Ode to Donger

Too embarrassed to tell you who I am Dear Honi,

Living at college is somewhat like living in a pre-school. Aside from the plethora of jokes this simile affords, what I am actually referring to is the near constant stream of colds, viruses and general sicknesses that get passed around from day to day (again, you can fill in the jokes here yourself).

Now having contracted Generic Illness Unknown, spending all week in bed listening to One Direction and pretending it was still week five, I finally got around to reading the three back issues of Honi that had been hiding assignments on my desk all month. Towards the back end of last week’s issue, I resolved to stop reading, because despite my often voiced hatred of this year’s college column, in particular the “Donger” character, I must now shamefully admit to being incredibly attracted to him.

After reading his fake USU CV, and very much in spite of his repulsive language and the largely inaccurate and

defamatory representation of college he is responsible for, I seriously can’t help it. He was a Joey’s halfback you say?

He rows you say? (And on the right side and at the right end of the boat too) Where are my pants, I say...

Unfortunately, I know how this scenario plays out for me. I stalk him from afar at College rowing, and after sharing my new favourite person to look at with the crew, then going for a quick paddle, we head back to college and get just drunk enough to make it seem like a good idea for my friend to go get all up in his grill at the Dail. Following this, and some ill advised hook-upery on my own behalf at the VD, I am left with a highly inconvenient desire for someone who gets a beer gut and tuckshop lady arms out of season and an awkward string of run-ins at school friend’s 21sts weeks later with him and his girlfriend of several months.

So since College Legends and Harry Styles are giving me a reputation for spectacularly poor and inappropriate taste in men, help a girl out and give us someone worth swooning over.

Proudly anti-life Tim Whelan Economics I

It has been 24 hours since the formation of the LifeChoices society, and it has already reached Konyesque levels of rage on my Facebook feed. I find this deeply troubling, along with everyone else who made two mouseclicks to sign an online petition.

To those calling for this society’s repeal, I support your cause wholeheartedly - and offer the following solutions: 1. Go to the Union pharmacy (Wentworth Building, Level 2) and buy enough ACCESS-discounted RU-486 pills to counter the amount of abortions this society will prevent: fuck all.

2. Demand recall elections against the six agents of deceit who have voted this calumny through instead of focusing their time and energy on the violent overthrow of Michael Spence, like they promised.

3. Form an anti-anti-abortion society, and request funding for it. If it’s granted, you expose this freedom-of-speech interpretation for the farce it is. If it is denied, you are now on even higher moral ground in that abortion rights are being lobbied against and your right to dissent against it has been silenced.

4. Take a long, hard look in the mirror and accept that no union, company, religion, circle of friends, or community group you join is going to perfectly align with your philosophical and political ideals. In lieu of this, you may want to toss in your ACCESS card in a fit of nihilism and give up your discounted beer out of principle.

I will support your freedom to be an indignant human centipede on the condition that you respect the Union’s freedom to vote on a controversial issue (freedom of speech) pertaining to a controversial issue (abortion) and - unthinkably - reach a controversial decision.

Also, if we’re going to call LifeChoices anti-choice, we should probably call ourselves anti-life for consistency’s sake.

It’s only fair.

Yours in anti-life, Tim

facebook.com/honisoitsydney

Editorial

Debate over LifeChoice Sydney being officially accepted by the USU C&S program was rife at the weekend.

The ideological mud-slinging has been rife; the discussion of procedural practice less so. Cries of discrimination, vilification, aggression, and marginalisation have rung far louder than those for liberty, freedom, and the right to discussion. Personally, this seems counterintuitive.

Surely the brush that with one stroke paints a desire for open dialogue and freedom of association paints an acceptance of pro-life views with another. Libertarianism is a double-edged sword - conservative voices are heard on campus; to decry their right to exist is to deny the liberty that dissidents are trying to defend.

Whether LifeChoice will actually foster the debate it seeks to promote remains to be seen.

But, the issue facing the Board was whether the beliefs that underpin LifeChoice were sufficient rationale to establish a club or society. Niche interests and beliefs have formed the basis for societies before – but where the line can be drawn is a procedural grey area.

I am pro-choice. But this means I’m obliged to respect the beliefs of prolifers, on the proviso they in turn respect mine, and practice their own beliefs with that respect.

If you don’t like it, say so. If LifeChoices echoes your views, sign up. But the argument shouldn’t be one of ideology. There will be of time for vitriol if the club is found to breach anti harassment and discrimination policies.

Turn to page four for Honi’s analysis of the Board’s decision on the matter, and page seven for a debate on the society.

This week’s Honi marks the end of classes for Semester One, and with it, the end of Honi for now. We hope the semester has been fulfilling, and that these pages have given you something with which you can engage. Honi will be back in print the first week of next semester.

Until we see you again in August, watch the skies for the impending relaunch of www.honisoit.com .

A safe and happy holiday to all.

James O’Doherty Twitter: @jmodoh

This Friday night...

Alex Meekin Comm/Sci/Dip. Lang V Dear Honi, Another Friday night, another moral panic. Last week it was hounding St Paul’s for not hiring non-Indian waiters for a Raj party, this week it’s outrage that a bunch of joyless pro-lifers get access to Hermann’s drink vouchers (do they even do jugs of pub squash?). It seems that all the great crusades begin just as the weekend kicks off. This, of course, begs the question – do any of us lefties have a social life?

How is it that a GetUp! petition gets hundreds of responses when everyone should have been munted and oblivious to the woes of the world? Why are the brave ‘activists’ of the interwebs apparently not getting invited to any parties?

It can’t be that the Right are more fun – Barry O would even stop us plying kiddies with booze in our own home.

So this Friday I prose we cut out the holier-than-thou, crack open a (Fair Trade) Rekorderlig, and get on with it – if what Twitter tells us is bad is really that bad, it’ll surely still be there to be solved by petition on Monday.

honi soit

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Campus WEEKLY NEWS

USU Board approves pro-life society

Adam Chalmers reports on the new club which has student politics in a spin During the most recent University of Sydney Union Board meeting on Friday June 1, the Board voted 6-5 to allow LifeChoice Sydney, a pro-life group, to become an official USU club.

LifeChoice had previously been rejected by the C&S Committee, which all clubs must go through to be approved, on the grounds its “aims were too narrow”. The committee agreed that if they approved a single-issue interest group such as LifeChoice, they’d have to approve any number of other over-specific niche societies. As such LifeChoice was rejected for violating (3)(a)(i) of the C&S regulations, that clubs and societies should “enrich the student experience at the university”.

At the advice of Board director Mina Nada, a dozen members of LifeChoice appealed their case to the Union Board meeting, claiming the C&S committee rejected them on invalid grounds. After some debate, the USU Board found the committee had no grounds to reject their application. The Board overturned the Committee’s ruling, allowing LifeChoice Sydney to join the C&S program. USU President Sibella Matthews explained: “a club’s focus being too “narrow” is not a reason to reject a club under the C&S regulations.”

Members of the LifeChoice group are thrilled with the decision, but many students are angered by the Board’s ruling, as are several Board members themselves.

The constitution of LifeChoice says it seeks to “promote the dignity of human

life from conception til natural death” and “foster discussion of abortion and euthanasia” and their alternatives.

A Facebook group called “STOP the ‘LifeChoice’ (anti-abortion) Society at USYD” has already been set up, with over 200 members. The group has called the decision a “disgusting misuse of the Board”, which has “failed its students and is undermining the inclusiveness it seeks to promote”. Its members have labelled LifeChoice Sydney “an attack on women’s rights”.

Union Board directors overturned the C&S committee’s agreement because they disagreed with its interpretation of C&S regulations. “In all my time as C&S chair, I never knocked back any society for being too narrow,” said Board Director James Flynn. Board members generally agreed that it was wrong to ask LifeChoice to become a division of a religious or political group. Proposed President Rebecca Elias said: “LifeChoice is non-religious, non-political. Obviously it has a lot of overlap with politics/law/ ethics societies, but they’re just overlaps.

We don’t look at pro-life from a specific perspective like that.”

The head of USU Student Programs, Alistair Cowie, cited the Chocolate Society, and the Captain Planet Appreciation Society, which is separate to the Pop Culture Society, as examples of narrow clubs that have been approved before despite overlap with larger ones.

The motion to approve LifeChoice was voted for by directors James Flynn, Mina Nada, Astha Rajvanshi, Zachary Thomp-

COMMENT: USU ELECTION

No longer Left out

Liberals Nick Coffman and Vale Sloane looked strong in the lead up to the election. Honi Soit illustrated Mr Coffman’s dominance of Facebook campaigning, and Mr Sloane’s handy preference deals had seemed to put him in good stead.

Initially, the Left’s candidature was shaky. The traditionally powerful Labor Left (NLS) did not even run a candidate.

Doubts loomed over John HardingEasson following Alexandra Cowan’s loss last year.

Tom Raue took a gamble in being the only candidate to campaign as openly political and thus openly left-wing. He

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While most Board members appeared to disagree with pro-life sentiments, they did not want to let their personal views stop students from starting a society with oppositional beliefs. Mr Pogonoski and Mr Treeves suggested the society rebrand as a “bioethics discussion society”, but it was agreed this would just lead to AGMs being stacked and that such a group would be torn apart by internal conflict.

Ms Moxham-Hall and Ms Brooks were concerned the club would vilify women who have had abortions or people who identify as pro-choice supporters. They were reminded that under 4(d)(ii) of the C&S Regulations, “Clubs and Societies shall not use freedom of speech to defame, vilify or incite violence against individuals or groups.” While the Board acknowledged the risk of vilification from LifeChoices, they decided it would be unfair to pre-emptively reject the society for actions it might hypothetically take in the future. If the club tried to hold anti-abortion protests or print offensive advertising material (for example, pictures of dead foetuses), C&S would discipline the society under 4(d) (ii) The group is also still bound by the University’s Harassment and Discrimination Prevention Policy.

Several students from the Stop LifeChoice Facebook page and SRC col-

lectives are organising a general meeting of the USU, where they plan to introduce constitutional amendments which would forbid C&S from approving discriminatory or oppressive societies.

In response to LifeChoice’s approval, the Board is working to “develop a policy about these special interest clubs, as we currently have no guidance in our governing documents or C&S regulations as to how to deal with these singleissue groups.”

Honi asked Ms Matthews if the Board had a responsibility to stop offensive societies from being founded, and why they would allow a pro-life society, but not a ‘Nazi Germany Appreciation Society’ or ‘Marriage Between Men and Women’ society. She replied: “It is difficult to draw the line, and that is why we are now developing a policy on the issue.”

Ms Munro and Mr Pogonoski asked that approval or rejection of LifeChoices be delayed until the Union Board had written such a policy, as well as a policy governing direct appeals to the Board.

Mr Nada believed this policy would retrospectively judge the appeal. He asked instead that LifeChoice’s proposals be “judged based on the pre-existing procedures under which they apply.” Ms Matthews echoed this concern saying, “retrospective law-making is widely regarded as poor governance.”’

The issue has disrupted the unity of the Board, with directors from both sides tweeting and blogging passionately about the decision.

Factional antics sour the occasion

Some things never change, writes Kade Denton and Michael Koziol

Factions put in a strong showing, writes Fabian Di Lizia Student politics has surged to the right in recent times, especially considering the left-wing lineage of elected student bodies on campus. Right-wing groups and independents, have caused much heartache for the Left recently. The ‘Voice’ 2011 SRC election campaign threatened to dislodge Labor left’s stronghold on the SRC. The independent movement has spawned a whole new generation of student politicians. Many of the ‘Voice’ campaigners returned to support Karen Chau for the USU elections and proved strong contenders, while Hannah Morris polled first despite not having traditional factional backing.

son, and Shane Treeves. Directors Nai Brooks, Brigid Dixon, Vivienne-Moxham Hall, Jacqui Munro, and Rhys Pogonoski voted against it. Upon observing the 5-5 split, Sibella Matthews voted in favour and the motion was passed.

told Honi that he only wanted the left-wing vote. This was a dangerous ploy; Mr Raue alienated right-wing voters and potentially, politically neutral voters. His policy stances were overtly leftwing, against a “corporate” USU.

The winning candidates at Hermann’s Bar on election night.

Left to right: Tom Raue, Sophie Stanton, Karen Chau, John HardingEasson, and Hannah Morris.

Photo: John Fennel

Impressively, Raue’s tactic paid dividends. He was able to mobilise the left and take second place. This was impressive considering Coffman was a favourite and went unelected. The Left has shown that it still exists as a powerful campaigning and voting bloc on campus.

The lines were drawn and the knives were out. Following the heated 2011 SRC election, this year’s University of Sydney Union election was as much about the strength and standing of the factions and political groups on campus, as it was the future of the union.

Doubts over John Harding-Easson were dispelled as he comfortably came third. His win marks a return for Labor Right. He was also able to marshal a reasonably strong campaigning group.

From seven candidates there was one soft-right Liberal, a moderate Liberal, a candidate from Student Unity, a Green, two independents, and an independent supported by NLS. These political divides were clear for the entire election, with factional allegiances questioned at the candidate soapbox.

The left illustrated its presence to the surprise of many. The SRC elections will be a bigger test, as voters grow weary of NLS’ near two-decade stranglehold on the presidency.

On election day, both independent and factional camps took to jeering by song.

“NLS and Unity are Liberals in disguise” was chanted by a number of indies, myself (Kade - Eds.) included. But the

@honi_soit

jewel in the crown came once the results were known. At the election after-party, members of the NLS and Unity factions gleefully sang: “John is up and Rhys is down.”

This was in reference to the successful election of Labor Right’s John HardingEasson, but also the expected triumph of Astha Rajvanshi over Rhys Pognoski as the next USU President. This is due to the way the newly elected board directors are expected to vote at the end of this month.

It was heartwarming to see the factions have lost none of their bravado, despite the much greater success of indies in this election (with Hannah Morris smashing quota and Karen Chau polling fourth).

It was a particularly cruel barb at what should be a moment of celebration and congratulation for all who have endured a long campaign.

It should be noted that those chants were not sung by members of the Grassroots faction, whose candidate Tom Raue took second place. But his overtly political campaign, for a position on what is ultimately an apolitical Union Board, does pose significant questions about how Mr Raue can work in the best interests of all. Can a corporate entity sustain an enemy within? We shall see.

Campus It’s All Relative Hannah Bruce on PhotoSoc and the Fine Arts Society

“Disembodied”, by Shuang Wu

PhotoSoc and the Fine Arts Society are teaming up to showcase the talent of their members in an exhibition at the Tate Gallery, Glebe’s newest addition to the visual arts scene.

Themed around the concept ‘Relativity’, the body of work “invites the viewer to reflect upon both our power and our susceptibility” through the subjects of the images and artworks exhibited.

Fine Arts Society president Andrew Kim called for submissions in an inventive stop-motion video, sparking the interest of campus creatives.

Current creative director and former president of PhotoSoc, Kimberley Low, says the theme was kept deliberately ambiguous. “We didn’t want to give anyone hints,” she said. “We wanted to keep it as open as possible and allow artists to bring a lot of meaning that you might not see at first”.

One of the most memorable photographs Kimberley describes was developed from a roll of expired film bought at a garage sale, containing a single image taken in the 80s.

With submissions closed, the clubs now have to select and arrange over 70 pieces to make up the large and diverse body of work, aiming to “create an imprint in the mind”, as Kimberley explains.

The Tate has a rent-free, commissionfree gallery space, an initiative of those behind Sydney’s Lo-Fi Collective.

Tate Gallery, Toxteth Hotel, Glebe Launch party Wed 13th June Showing 13th June – 17th June Gold coin donation Visit www.usydphotoart.com for more info

HONILEAKS

HONI TAB

All your university gossip, rumours, allegations and revelations with Kira Spucys-Tahar

USU Elections

At the end of a fairly tame election campaign, five candidates were successfully elected to the Union Board. The total vote count was 4874, with ballots cast at the Camperdown, Darlington, Rozelle, Mallet Street, and Conservatorium campuses. The elected candidates were, in order: Hannah Morris, Tom Raue, John Harding-Easson, Karen Chau, and Sophie Stanton. Quota was 812 votes, and broken by Ms Morris and Mr Raue. Ms Morris is only the fourth female candidate to top the polls in the Union’s 134-year history.

One of the biggest surprises on election day was the result for Sophie Stanton. Ms Stanton drew on a varied group of campaigners, including several far-right Liberals, but was visibly surprised to be elected. Her campaign was somewhat dormant relative to many of the other candidates, but it seems she drew strength when it counted.

This shock ran parallel to the downfall of Nick Coffman. It seems his campaign failed to capitalise on his social media presence, and the lack of a college vote led to the final nail in the Coffman.

The election results have led many to believe Astha Rajvanshi will be the next President of the USU, with Mr Raue, Mr Harding-Easson, and Ms Stanton all likely to vote in her favour, along with Zac Thompson and Brigid Dixon.

It is widely predicted Ms Dixon will be the Vice-President. More interesting have been suggestions Presidential rival Rhys Pogonoski would retain his position as Honorary Treasurer. But all executive speculation has been thrown into disarray with many Board Directors dissatisfied with the outcome of the LifeChoice proposal at the most recent Board meeting.

The saga continues...

The Economics Society saga continues with the club due to hold its third attempt at an AGM this Friday. Honi understands both sides of the dispute have been trying to persuade people to attend the meeting in order to get themselves elected. Honi has heard that deals were made with certain Union Board candidates whereby people campaigned for them in exchange for support at the AGM. Honi was also made aware of people lecture-bashing economics classes and offering chocolates to people to sign-up as members of the society.

Joel Einstein sent a message to more than 70 people in support of the ousted executive. Mr Einstein said: “We need to all come to the AGM and to bring

Odds of new CAMPUS SOCIETY: ----------

as many people as possible to the AGM to ensure that for once the good guys win as opposed to the politically savvy student who will turn into one of those adults you don’t want to be.” Mr Einstein told Honi rumours about a quid pro quo agreement were “completely untrue”. He admitted to sending a lengthy message to friends who might be interested in attending the meeting. When asked whether fighting stacking with stacking was an appropriate response, Mr Einstein said he was supporting individuals in his capacity as a friend.

HOORAY BABIES! $1.03 STOP THE boats $1.31 the greatest love of all soc $3.82

The C&S Committee recommended the AGM be held for a third time after it found the meeting was not conducted to their preferred standards. Honi understands C&S will be closely monitoring this new AGM to ensure it follows the club’s constitution and USU procedures.

WorkChoice: Not all professors sacred? $5.27 euphemism SocIETY $6.90

It’s not so queer cut

Miniature INstruments $9.09

Tempers have flared over the past week in relation to the nature of autonomy and the Queerspace Houseparty event.

The Queerspace, located in the Holme building, is owned by the University of Sydney Union. It is usually an autonomous space, which means only people who are queer identifying, or who are invited into the space by members, can use the space. The SRC’s Queer Action Collective makes use of the space through an agreement with the USU.

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Organisers of the event decided to make the Houseparty event non-autonomous, meaning anyone is free to attend.

After a conference was held last year, the Union granted co-ordinators the right to make the space non-autonomous if appropriate notice was given for an event.

The decision made by 2012 Queer Student Program Coordinators Nathan Li and Diana Kalkoul raised the ire of several members of the Collective and the general community, who expressed their concerns via a Facebook thread.

Many comments supported a view that by opening the space to the wider community, the safety and comfort of the queer collective were being undermined.

Many also expressed concerns that the general autonomy of the space was being devalued and were upset the decision had been made without consultation with the SRC’s Queer Action Collective.

Coordinator Nathan Li told Honi Soit, “I do feel bad that we failed to consult the Collective. I take responsibility for that.” But after having spent time and money organising the event he said, “What do they want me to do? I can’t just call off the party.”

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The USU Queer Coordinators removed the post in question from the Facebook event and said they would be considering the issue with USU staff this week.

SUPRA Update Angelus Valentine Morningstar successfully fended off a challenge from Sharangan Maheswaran to be elected as President of the Sydney University Postgraduate Representative Association (SUPRA). Mr Morningstar’s ticket ‘Postgrads for Postgrads’ had 14 candidates elected, and Mr Maheswaran’s ticket ‘Supranova’ had four of seven candidates elected. Members of the two factions also filled the equity councillor positions.

Words with Friends

What are your plans for the semester break?

MOLLY Arts III “I’m going to do a sewing course.”

ELIZABETH Arts (Languages) III “Watching Wimbledon, the Tour de France, and doing the audit for the French society. Pretty much what I do every winter holidays.”

JESS Arts III “Working overtime and reading a book on the Balkans. A lecturer for next semester sent an email telling us to start on it now.”

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DAVID Arts/Social Work III

“Catch up on TV and get reacquainted with the couch, it has been a long separation. I guess I should also prepare for next semester.”

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News Review Back to the Murray-Darling drawing board

The regions will never consider the current water plan their own, writes Lane Sainty In December last year, scores of ‘Closing Down’ signs accompanied the Christmas decorations in the shop windows of Griffith, NSW. It felt eerie, as if the whole country town was giving up, finally acquiescing to the undeniable pessimism lingering in the air since the years of the drought.

But there was a catch: none of the stores were actually closing. The signs were part of a protest intended to show the members of the Murray-Darling Basin Authority (MDBA) exactly what the town would look like should the proposed changes to water allocations currently under debate go ahead.

For those who haven’t been paying attention: over past decades, the water in the Murray-Darling Basin - the catchment area for the Murray-Darling river systems, encompassing parts of NSW, Victoria, South Australia, and Queensland - has been systematically over-allocated to irrigators. This, coupled with last decade’s drought, means that dire environmental consequences now loom in South Australia.

Last week saw the release of the third draft of the proposed plan to deal with this issue, approximately 18 months after angry Griffith farmers burned copies

of the first draft in a heated ‘community consultation’. Since those first meetings, which were little more than supervised screaming matches, the amount of water to be slashed from the irrigators’ share has been bumped down.

The plan released last week put forward 2750 gigalitres per year as the MDBA’s figure for how much water will be returned to the river. The figure was pounced on by each side of the debate, some shouting for a higher figure and others for a lower. And so on it goes.

For some, it is simple: most scientists agree that water needs to be returned to the Basin, so let’s return it. But, the other side goes, doing so will arguably kill off towns like Griffith, whose industry and economy relies on irrigation. Poor media coverage and misinformation have contributed to the heavy polarising of this issue, pushing each side into a fierce zero-sum game.

Throughout the entire debacle, Water Minister Tony Burke has held up a remarkable, I would say unjustified, optimism. On some level, he must know that this plan will never satisfy all sides of the debate. What he could do, however, is try harder to make the people of the Basin feel more involved in

the process.

A good start would be acknowledging a simple fact: there is nothing country people hate more than city people telling them what’s best. Yes, irrigators are angry, and at times throughout the process, they have resorted to alarmist tactics which have exhibited them in the worst possible light. But Basin communities were not involved enough in the early workings of the Basin Plan and will never consider the current plan their own. Starting from scratch would take so much time and money that it almost shouldn’t be on the table. But it may be one way of developing a plan that will create compromise on some, if not all, of the many relevant issues.

Signs still line the streets of Griffith, railing against the ‘enviro-mental-ists’ who are apparently hell-bent on doing damage to their precious town. And figures still show that the proposed 2750 GL is not enough water to adequately nurse the Basin back to health. Compromise between irrigators and environmentalists still seems light years away.

Clearly, the plan as it stands is not big enough for the both of ‘em. To achieve at least some degree of mutual satisfaction, that will have to change.

God love the Queen

Elliot Nolan is not a pasty-white etiquette-pedant with a starched collar. That shirt is in the wash.

I am what you might call a ‘snivelling monarchist’, much to the derision of my family, who are all Labor-voting republicans. There is nothing in the world that makes me more enthusiastic than seeing a thousand years of tradition, pomp, and ceremony validated by a Royal Jubilee.

However, I must take issue with Ben Brooks’ article in these pages last week (“A diamond celebration”, May 30). I understand he is a known monarchist, but he does little to help our cause: rather, Mr Brooks asserts that the Australian public sees us as “pasty-white etiquettepedants with starched collars”.

First of all, my pasty whiteness is an unfortunate result of my Anglo-Irish background. Second, I understand the limitations of correct etiquette in this modern age. I only practise it when I happen to be dining with HRH The Prince of Wales, since we’re such good chums. Third, I haven’t seen anyone wear a starched collar since 1952.

We’re not bad people by any means.

The Australian Monarchist League may

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be supported by Tony Abbott, and he may be present at many of our classy and expensive dinners, but we don’t all subscribe to right-wing values. I tend to sit on the fence in politics, but I still support gay marriage and people who aren’t privileged white males. I don’t believe in any sort of God, either.

My support for the constitutional monarchy in Australia is not because I think it’s quaint and upholds the class structure which I have benefited from, but because I cannot see what the alternatives are, nor can most Australians. By most Australians, I don’t mean the leftleaning (read: radical communist) university students most readers of Honi Soit consort with, but people who have left university and are living out in the real world. What we want to know is how a republic, in whatever form, would make a difference to us in day-to-day life.

Our Queen is above celebrity. The scandals of the month or the decade do not affect her position and, being at the top, she has no incentive to further her

own interests. She is there to oversee the smooth running of her kingdoms, supported by her governors-general.

The Queen and the royal family provide support during hard times. They are well aware of their immense privilege, but they do not sit around all day drinking tea and making racist jokes (I’m looking at you Prince Philip). Each member is more engaged in charities and fundraisers than any politician. You might scoff and think it an easy job, but such things make a real difference to the average person. They certainly don’t have to do it.

So as I sit here, sipping my cognac (I understand the irony) and smoking a briar pipe, waiting for the mouth cancer to take me to my grave, my heart fills with jubilation over the weekend’s Jubilee. I didn’t don my finest black-tie for it, nor bellow ‘God Save the Queen’. I did, however, reflect on a 300-year old institution that, unlike any republic in the last two thousand years, has fortuitously stood the test of time (while still adapting and modernising). Long live the Queen!

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Gay marriage will ‘create another stolen generation’, claims bioethicist Flora Grant attended the IQ2 debate on same-sex marriage

A leading bioethicist, Professor Nicholas Tonti-Filippini, has likened children of same-sex parents to the children of the stolen generation, arguing that the lack of a biological link to both parents is unjust to children. The professor made the controversial claim at last week’s IQ2 Debate held at City Recital Hall, on the proposition that ‘same sex marriage should not be legalised’. His provocative statement was met with boos and hissing from the audience of more than 400.

Dr Tonti-Filippini argued that children of same-sex parents lacked a biological link to at least one parent, and thus were “always a stepchild to at least one parent”. He reasoned that these children were likely to have similar negative social and personal outcomes to those experienced by some stepchildren.

Dr Tonti-Filippini spoke for the motion alongside Professor Annamarie Jagose, head of the School of Letters, Art and Media at Sydney University.

The rules of the house for IQ2 debates meant that though Jagose and Phillipini sat on the same side of the debate, agreeing that same-sex marriage should not be legalised, they could take quite different reasoning to arrive at their conclusions.

Jagose described her point of view as ‘pro-gay, anti-marriage’, arguing that gay marriage advocates have oversimplified the debate so that being for or against same-sex marriage is to be for or against gay people. She argued that the ‘dying institution’ of marriage itself is exclusionary, meaning that people in long term monogamous relationships are privileged over alternative intimacies, and that the same-sex marriage movement only privileges gay couples that live exactly like married straight couples.

Lord Mayor Clover Moore was greeted with whoops and cheers, and her fellow panellist against the proposition, conservative political strategist Mark Textor, propounded many of the familiar arguments for gay marriage. They asked why same-sex couples should be excluded from the support, love, and recognition associated with marriage. Cr Moore argued that our understanding of marriage is locked in a 1900s paradigm, and that same-sex couples would strengthen the institution. Textor also said that excluding gay couples from marriage is ‘un-Australian’, though an audience member challenged this, arguing that allowing same-sex marriage would not eliminate day-to-day discrimination.

The attendees were pre-polled at 75 per cent against the motion (and therefore for gay marriage), 15 per cent for, and 10 per cent undecided. At the end, the audience’s votes were taken again, with a 2 per cent increase to the ‘for’ team coming from the undecided.

Ultimately the debate’s result reflected majority public opinion with the side for gay marriage maintaining its lead.

Op-Shop Time to terminate intuition

Emotion and precedent cloud the abortion debate to the detriment of us all, writes Eleanor Gordon-Smith The debate about abortion is so embedded in emotional flytraps and reasonless intuition that it’s easy to forget to test for ideological consistency.

The pro-choice movement is one firmly embedded in the leftist tradition.

As early as the 1850s, early women’s movements began supporting contraception and female bodily autonomy, rights which trod the logical path towards legalised abortion. There are similar historical links between the hard catholic right and the pro-life tradition, which do admittedly correlate highly. The religious right makes much of the Bible’s tendency to speak in terms of the moment of conception; “Adam knew his wife, Eve, and she conceived and gave birth to Cain”.

It’s intuitively surprising that Susan B Anthony, a leader of the 19th century women’s cause, condemned any and all abortions, or that Eric Cantor’s wife is pro-choice.

It’s easy in this context soak up a view on abortion from your surrounds without a great deal of self-questioning.

Much of the abortion discussion relies on intuition and precedent. But intuition is a profoundly useless philosophical tool. It’s animal; knee-jerk and rooted in evolution. It’s seldom the best guide to ethical reasoning.

It appeals to the frameworks that already exist around the debate and tells us how best align to them. It doesn’t tell us why we should value those frameworks.

Perhaps the most interesting case of intuition muddying an important debate is the “late term survivor” narrative. It is a story told by many. It involves the bungled abortion of a late-term foetus, such that the foetus - or baby, or collection of cells, or whatever term you want to use – breathes and moves outside the womb, and is then left to die or killed.

Ron Paul has famously narrated his experience of seeing [doctors] “lift out a small baby that was able to cry and breathe and they put it in a bucket and put it in the corner of the room and pretended it wasn’t there”. Something in this is upsetting, more than it would have been if the child-cell-cluster-whatever had stayed inside the womb.

This case was echoed in the case of Tracy Godwin, a woman whose 22-week old foetus was born prematurely, cried and breathed, but was refused resuscitation by staff at an NHS hospital in the United Kingdom.

Something in these cases triggers a strong emotional objection. Perhaps it’s that the thing, whatever we call it, breathes. Perhaps in Ms Godwin’s case it’s the fact that she wanted to leave the hospital with a son.

But the fact that a 22-week old is visible or audible alters nothing about its status as a rights-bearer. Either it is sentient enough to deserve rights, or it is not. Either its potential to be an adult human gives it rights, or it does not.

Whether it is inside a womb or not is irrelevant to its right to life, and we need to overcome our gut instincts in order to make sense of this part of the debate.

And it is important. A line has been drawn at 24 weeks, yet physicians face lawsuits for failure to resuscitate these foetuses. Hospitals are crucified in the media and the physicians placed in an unbearable ethical trap.

These are confronting and sometimes graphic stories but they are ones that need to be confronted if we are to make sense of the right-to-life spectrum. Either we disregard intuition or we do not, but a susceptibility to emotional knee-jerks is marring the debate in a way that hurts policy and women.

A desire to protect the young of the species - a protective urge towards children - is a fairly predictable intuition in a sentient species. But it has no place in the debate.

Game on for gun lovers

The Premier is a pea-shooter in the face of pressure, reports Ben Brooks Late last week, the NSW Premier was referred to the Independent Commission Against Corruption. The Opposition allege that Barry O’Farrell offered Shooters and Fishers Party MPs financial inducements to secure their vote for his power privatisation legislation. The deal would see administration entitlements increase from $80,000 to $150,000 per year for minor party MPs. The Government has already ceded to demands from those MPs to allow shooting in national parks, despite electoral promises that Mr O’Farrell would “not turn our national parks into hunting reserves” or “do deals with minor parties”. Labelling the aboutturn a “conservation” measure, the Government will allow feral animal hunts in 79 of the state’s parks.

Though he commands a majority in the Legislative Assembly, the Legislative Council is evenly divided between the Liberal and Labor spheres of influence.

The Shooters and the Christian Democratic Party thus hold the balance of power, particularly in respect of contentious legislation. As he grapples with ongoing gangland shootings, Mr O’Farrell will tread carefully, and perhaps misguidedly, to avoid offending the gun-owning electorate.

Feature:

Take Ron Paul’s claim that we should recognise the right to life to foetuses, he says, because we feel damage has been done if a car accident halts a pregnancy.

Or the objection of some Minessota physicians to performing “twin reduction” a euphemistic term for controversial medical practices of recent years that involves the abortion of one foetus in a uterus containing two.

Innocent people will continue to die until the world bites the bullet (page 11)

None of the analysis behind these objections is rooted in first principles.

FIGHT CLUB: LifeChoice Sydney LifeChoice denigrates the university community, writes James Evans Despite the name, LifeChoice Sydney is not about choices. It is about denial of a choice. It’s about saying to people who have had abortions that they are murderers, that what they have done is wrong and that other people finding themselves with unwanted pregnancies must suffer through them. It’s about an argument that says instead of providing safe, judgement-free, and legal means for a pregnant person to have an abortion, we should deny them that, instead forcing the most desperate of these people into sourcing unsafe and illegal abortions.

It is a society that will stigmatise and disempower those who have had abortions and those who may be seeking an abortion. It tells these people that they do not own their own bodies and that they do not have a right to their

own bodies. It is abhorrent. If the perversely and ambiguously named LifeChoice Sydney really wants to discuss issues of abortion and euthanasia then let’s talk about it. Let’s host an event, and involve the collectives and some of the seventeen religious societies already part of C&S (of which 12 are explicitly Christian).

I don’t want my union to allow a single-issue society that inherently shames and denigrates members of the union, students at this university, and people within the wider community.

People who have had abortions are stigmatised enough without this shame heaped upon them by a society approved by our union board. If anyone should feel ashamed of themselves it’s the six directors who approved LifeChoice Sydney.

The real opponents of choice are those who want to shut down debate, writes Abigail McCarthy When I discovered Friday morning that the Clubs & Societies committee had rejected the proposed “LifeChoices” society, I was disappointed. Not because I intend joining, but because another club with the potential to unite similarly minded students, and allow them the expression of deeply held beliefs, had been lost. Yet a few hours later there was an explosion of vitriol and anger at the USU Board’s overturning of that rejection.

From a C&S perspective, I’m baffled as to how clubs such as ‘Students for Palestine’ and ‘CubeSoc’ are considered to be of broader interest than one dealing with all stages of human life.

I’m confused as to how a Conservative/ Solidarity club represents more than the perspective they advocate. If the narrowness and single-sidedness of LifeChoices were the grounds on which it was originally denied club status, funds should be denied to the vast majority of clubs that do not represent every single Access

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member. As the single greatest platform for student freedom of speech, C&S has the responsibility to allow LifeChoices to exist.

If it is the effect on students that objectors are worried about, I would encourage them to presume the group’s innocence. They have no intention to vilify women, but instead to raise awareness.

Trolls and misogynists on their site are quickly shut down and apologised for, a lot more quickly than opponents who labelled the group as ‘disgusting’ and ‘anti-feminist’ were. There have been no ‘photoshopped phoetus posters’ and the expressed intent of LifeChoices is only to ‘foster discussion’ and ‘provide information about alternatives’. A “ProChoice” society is welcome to do the same.

Misleading as you may think their name is, the really anti-choice lobby out there are the people who’d prefer to stifle debate rather than embrace the issue of Choice head on.

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The Third Drawer

Talk of the Town

Sydney may be the shining emerald of Australia, but does it hold a candle to the city that never sleeps?

Neha Kasbekar thinks you might be surprised (you won’t be)

BOROUGHS/SUBURBS While New York displays impressive disregard for subtlety by giving its boroughs names like ‘Dumbo’, ‘Yonkers’ and ‘Hell’s Kitchen’, Sydney has and will always have ‘Panania’ and juvenile misspellings of the same.

Where NY edges out Sydney is in the distinct identities of each of the boroughs. Harlem has more African hair-braiding centres than Starbucks.

Its National Jazz Museum is located at apartment 4B of a building just off a train station. Conversely, Manhattan (pronounced Muhn-hat-uhn, not Man-hat-uhn) has an entire Museum Mile, and curiously an entire mile of psychologists’ offices opposite all the museums. Williamsburg is Surry Hills, but for grown-ups.

The sum of the parts even makes for a coherent whole: there is absolutely a stereotypical New Yorker (hint: it’s the person on his or her phone loudly saying “FUCK off”, an expression which can be given about 18 different shades of meaning and tone by natives).

The city also most definitely has its own concept of time: the New York second, which is the infinitesimally small gap between when a traffic light turns green and when the deafening honking from behind ensues. Close call but New York holds out for the win.

TOP FIVE Old Teacher’s College

Comparison: Main street of Manhattan (top) and the main street of Parramatta (bottom)

TRANSPORT I’m afraid New York wins here as well. It’s boringly obvious that New York is better connected given greater population density and size, with an under 5-minute wait between trains on most lines. The far more interesting feature is that train entertainment is unfailingly better on New York subways. Despite a decade of using CityRail, my train experiences typically resemble the atmosphere of an unloved relative’s cremation. The most memora-

Campus bathrooms

ble moments have featured an inebriate threatening to sue a co-passenger for sexually assaulting his kneecaps (sic), and on a separate occasion, receiving a genuine sexual proposition while I was intermittently throwing up on myself.

NYC by contrast has treated me to personal serenades by a barbershop quintet, a conversion attempt by an unfailingly polite evangelist using spoken-word poetry that at one stage rhymed ‘Jesus’ with ‘sneezes’, and a non-descript middle-aged lady sitting next to me on the subway privately using subway passengers as models for drawing some of the most incrediblydetailed portraits I’ve ever seen. You’ll understand my rapture when I say that all of the above happened in a week.

CONSUMER SATISFACTION I’m calling this one a tie. NYC is characteristically super-sized in terms of the incredible diversity of food (everything from explosively-brilliant hole-in-the-wall Venezuelan places to the sweet flirtation with obesity that is eating a burger from The Shake Shack), clothes (vintage stores, highend boutique outlets and everything in between), and events (concerts, poetry slams, comedy nights, Gentlemen’s Clubs, drive-by shootings).

with Luke Dassaklis

Fairly modern and incredibly spacious these bathrooms offer you the privacy and cleanliness that Manning and Hermann’s simply cannot. The pseudo marble furnishings and vast amounts of space make you feel as though Moaning Myrtle may come out of any cubicle. Seldom used by anyone else, odds are you wont be disturbed from doing whatever it is that needs doing.

The Quad The heart of Sydney University, and the sandstone design employed by the building’s architects makes its bathrooms just as aesthetic as the building itself. Wide cubicles, moderate amounts of cleanliness and privacy are enough to make its bathrooms come in at number four.

Level Nine, Fisher Library This unisex, single cubicle water closet doesn’t look like much from afar. Many people would question why you would climb to level nine of Fisher just to use a toilet. On first inspection, it’s nothing special. It is only once you take a seat, however, that this quaint bathroom reveals its secrets to you: a breathtaking view of the CBD skyline that is truly cathartic.

New Law There are several bathrooms scattered around this building. After descending a few levels the least crowded bathroom can be found. Dark tiles and white amenities give these washrooms a particularly chic feel. Although a little cramped, the overall feeling of cleanliness and the lack of other people (if you time it right) is enough to place this bathroom at number 2.

Editor’s note: we do not recommend ever entering the main level bathrooms, unless the Easter Show is your idea of a nice lavatory.

R.C. Mills Located more or less at the centre of campus, these bathrooms, if slightly modified, could quite easily fit into any house. From the start, you know you are in for a treat, as you walk through frosted glass doors. Modern tiles give the bathroom a clean feel, and big mirrors make it feel particularly spacious. Very few people use these bathrooms, so they are untainted, and you are unlikely to be disturbed in your ventures. As a result, they come in at number one - the best toilets at Sydney University.

Honorable mentions go to Physics, with a very similar bathroom to Law, and John Woolley, who provide its users with three-ply paper.

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New York’s subway: at least it has character, but it’s no CityRail

Sydney has the edge though when it comes to certain price matters. American consumer prices aren’t tax-inclusive, which can become so infuriating that one uncharacteristically start developing strong Republican sympathies.

You also need to remember to tip in New York, although this can be leveraged as an effective strategy to get dramatically better service: just start talking audibly to someone else about how much you’re going to tip the person performing the service, be it driving you somewhere or serving you in a restaurant. The possibility of them dropping you 10 blocks short of your destination or urinating in your food is just one of the fun risks that make NYC such an exciting place.

Winner: New York. TKO.

Photos by Michaela Upton

The Third Drawer KATHY LETTE’S MATRIARCHY A guide to your own LifeChoices, with social and political commentator Kathy Lette

Ladies, there’s an angry mob coming after your uterus, and not in the good way! You might know about the LifeChoices society, which was approved by the USU Board on Friday.

Now, most people think LifeChoices is a superannuation fund. But it’s much scarier and more confusing than that.

These people want to force you to

actually have your baby instead of flushing the little fucker down the pipe. Now look, I’ve had four children.

Four! And there’s not a single one of them I don’t regret. I mean, my map of Tassie is unrecognisable. It looks like a spam pancake mashed with a mallet. You know what I’m talkin’ about, ladies?

And let me tell you, with every kid, my husband eats that pancake less and less, you know what I mean? He likes a stretch limo but that’s about all, am I right, ladies?

So these men that don’t want you to have an abortion…have they ever given birth? I doubt it. Get back to me when you’ve been in labour! Most men think

labour is something to do with Julia Gillard. But it’s much more painful than her. Am I right, ladies?

There’s a new Men’s Society on the horizon as well. Jeezaloo! Can you imagine the catering?! I sent my husband shopping once – it was on the weekend we had Julian Assange, Ned Kelly, Jack the Ripper, Malcolm Naden, and Elizabeth Taylor over for dinner.

He came back from Costco with ten sausages, a block of cheese, disinfectant, and a jumbo packet of crisps.

I don’t know what this Men’s Society wants to do, but I don’t think it can survive as an autonomous club. Let’s face it, there are only two things men like: having sex, and drinking beer.

And you need a woman around to serve the beer.

The good news is, ladies, that for either of these clubs to exist, they will have to file paperwork. And most men think paperwork is when you write something on a shopping list for your wife to buy. There’s a reason we’ve been secretaries and receptionists for the past 60 years, ladies! Because we know about paperwork! Just like men know about driving, and maps, and barbecuing, and power tools, and finances, and running corporations and governments. Ammirite, ladies?

Now I’m off to the hair salon for 11 hours. Bye bye!

ROAD TESt: Libraries Danielle Chiaverini searches for a cubicle of one’s own

Fisher Historically, “Fishdogs” has occupied a privileged place in my heart. Its size and sizeable number of serious scholars gives the place a “real library” atmosphere. A towering pile at the end of Eastern Avenue, Fisher Library is a mystery wrapped in an enigma, wrapped in some pretty controversial 1960s architecture (kind of why I love it).

Since renovations, I have had to search elsewhere for a place where I can really knuckle down and pump out that 1500 word paper in a mere four hours (kids: don’t try this at home). While it is true that ol’ Fishy needed a facelift (think: faulty power outlets and desk graffiti circa 1982), Reserve now features fire-engine-red décor and plush lounges with detachable work trays…I think I even saw a leather ottoman floating around. Ghastly!

Patrons keep to themselves. Fisher is not the place for socialising and/or procrastination. Go to Lawbry and stare into a sea of Macbook Airs instead.

In exam season, though, do not even bother getting there after the crack of dawn. You will arrive to find all tables occupied (or covered with a mélange of textbooks, empty USU coffee cups and highlighters) and you will be forced to sidle into the cleavages of aisles in the stack.

SciTech

Fisher: STOP THE CUTS!

I had a real love affair with SciTech in first year.

Located on the Darlington campus next to the Wentworth Student Centre, who can resist popping into Azzuri and settling down on one of the brightly colored fabric ‘wave chairs’ for a few hours of reading.

The staff at SciTech are also unusually helpful and if you are a student of the arts it can be the perfect escape from overhearing conversations of other students doing the EXACT SAME ESSAY AS YOU. In recent visits, however, I have been seriously disappointed. Internet connectivity wanes, one is forced to share a dining-cart style booth with a stranger, and the distance from desk to chair is fixed (seriously, who came up with the booth idea!?).

I was wrong.

SciTech is no oasis; it is a bubbling cesspool of chatty Business and Engineering students canvassing the spoils of last night’s BBQ & Goon Fest. The place is dirty and the décor is vomit-green. Plus the aroma of Subway cookies wafting from above is seriously distracting.

Badham Yes, another science library - but instead of being filled with loud Engineering students, you are occupied by studious pupils of biology who do not have social lives to talk about! Since the whole Fisher debacle, I have made a regular pilgrimage to Science Road to labour in the pale sunlight that engulfs Badham’s modest but accommodating dimensions.

Always buzzing with life, there is no creepy “dead-silence-it’s-just-me-and-the-mature-agelibrarian” feeling, yet the decibel is low and people are reserved. What’s more, Badham sports a slew of CUBICLE DESKS! Ah, the urban library myth. If you privilege study privacy or find that you are distracted easily, you will appreciate the focus cubicles afford.

However, the forever studious Biology and Pharmacy students like to print voluminously: expect delays.

Schaeffer Fine Arts (R.C. Mills Building) Aesthetics is where it’s at. Schaeffer is the most visually pleasing library on campus. Characterised by high ceilings, pine wood paneling, pastel artworks, and a floor-to-ceiling mirror that ascends the stairs of the Art History library.

Schaeffer is shamelessly populated by students from every discipline. It’s not big, though. Downstairs holds a modest five or six tables, while upstairs possesses a row of seats overlooking the balcony and stunning Manning lawn courts, as well as two group study rooms and a bank of Macs that demonstrate perfectly the importance of panache in this place.

Opening hours are not extensive, but come here when you need a library pick-me-up.

Schaeffer: unreservedly beautiful

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Medical We have all had a lecture in Bosch at some point and boy do those god-awful wooden slate benches really grind my gears. Not to mention the appalling canteen and sitting area that is hands down one of the most depressing locations on campus. But this doesn’t mean we should discount Bosch all together.

Walk through Bosch 1A, past the courtyard and up a flight of stairs into Bosch 1B and you’ll find the super secret study spot known as the Medical Library.

This place has all the trappings you’d expect of a medical bibliotheca: anatomy posters, half-open human models, and a kind of sterile ambiance, deepened by the spacious floor plan that dwarfs the average student. Nevertheless, the sacred cubicle desk can be found here and due to its isolated geography, there is an immense sense of calm. Try to snatch a spot overlooking Drew’s oval but steer clear during football season; college kids aren’t quiet about their patriotism.

Law The Law library is a tricky one and I kind of have a love-hate thing going on with it. While I love the amalgamation of intense study and ‘keep calm and carry on’ attitudes; I often feel somewhat unwelcome, like I have the words ‘DOESN’T DO LAW’ stamped across my forehead and patrons are giving me the stink eye behind my back.

Needless to say, the Law library has the swankiest set up of all. Everything is searing white and the open floor plan is very modern. It tends to get a little cramped though, especially when 3000 study spaces were lost in Fisher, causing truckloads of farty-Arts students to migrate.

Tips for patrons: make study fun by combining the words ‘Law’ and ‘Library’ into one nifty, hip term!

Also, people will respect you more if you drink Campos and wear business attire to uni everyday (‘corporate hipster’). Never make eye contact in the Lawbry: it is considered a sign of weakness. Instead, spend all your time on Law School Memes and trawling through Facebook.

Law: Unlike Schaeffer, more style than substance

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Taboo THE BODY

Weighing up the fun in the face of STIs Just use a fucking condom next time, writes Ludwig Schmidt

Two weeks ago my girlfriend and I slept with one of our close friends. My girlfriend and I have an open sex life, but before this we had never involved a third-party. We found the experience both adventurous and exciting and have grown closer as a result of it. Our relationship with our close friend, the third-party, remains unchanged.

Now the point of this article, contrary to what you might be expecting, is not to tell you how many forms of sex have been demonised in society that are actually both legitimate and commonly practiced, although that wouldn’t be the worst thing you could take from this. The point, rather, is to talk about an interesting grey area in sexual health practices this event led me to discover.

While my girlfriend’s and my threesome with our close friend was fun and something of a revelation, for a while it seemed like a disaster.

Later the following day both my girlfriend and I started feeling (and unfortunately seeing) what we were convinced were the tell tale signs of an STI. Burning sensation during sex. Check.

Burning sensation while peeing. Check.

Genitalia excreting gross fluid. Check.

We did a Google search, resigned to the fact that we were infected, to try and ascertain what exactly we had contracted.

Our conclusion after some thought and a day’s more experiential knowledge was that we had gonorrhea.

We went to the doctor to take the necessary tests (urine and blood); yours truly confronting his fear of needles by doing so. The inconvenience of this played second fiddle however to thoughts about the awkward conversation we thought we’d soon have to have with our friend. My girlfriend and I were actually so convinced by our self-diagnosis that we very nearly didn’t bother waiting for our results to come in before we spoke to them.

What a mistake that would have been.

To our complete surprise, our results came back negative to every main sexual transmitted infection and more.

What we had been dealing with, as our symptoms had started to subside, was a urinary tract infection (UTI), which shares many symptoms in common with

STIs and in rare circumstances passes between sexual partners. Very importantly though urinary tract infections are not very contagious. We no longer needed to tell our friend they had given us an STI. Despite the negative results of our tests, the saga got me thinking about our decision not to remove all possible ramifications by using a condom. It wasn’t even discussed. It just happened.

We all knew each other; my girlfriend and I were not in the habit of using condoms and it didn’t strike us for a second that our friend might impart upon us a lasting physical reminder of our sexual adventure, even though they led an active sex life.

The following thought is not original, but I feel it is worth repeating anyway.

STIs do not discriminate. It doesn’t matter how right something feels, there is always risk involved. Significantly minimise this risk by always using protection, if for no other reason than so you don’t ever have to tell one of your closest friends they gave you and indirectly your partner an STI.

In the end, we decided to just go with it because everything about what we were doing felt so ‘right’. I dare say others have done the exact same thing. It may have been a win for my sexuality, perhaps, but not for my sexual health.

I think this stands despite the fact I actually never had an STI. We were convinced, after all, that we did and I think there’s something in that.

OPINION: POWER AND PRIVILEGE

The trouble with celebrating colonialism Tenaya Alattas had low expectations of college, and even they weren’t met

and tuberculosis epidemics, as well as plague... in the spirit of irony let’s push all this aside and figure it okay to recreate the decadence of the ‘glory days’ of British colonialism and make a ball of it. Hilarious.

For those out of the loop, St Paul’s College recently held a colonial themed ‘British Raj’ party. With male students donning suits and black ties coupled with females in extravagant frocks the stage was set for the recreation of the decadence of British Raj, the heyday of the ol’ British empire.

True to its theme, guests were served by largely sub-continental wait staff.

With St Paul’s being representative of an elite institution constituting mainly of beneficiaries of old money (and hence beneficiaries of the expropriation, plunder, and genocide analogous with colonialism) – that this was allowed to happen at all is deeply disturbing (not to mention tacky and offensive).

Initial outrage aside, the intentions behind those who organised and/or designed the theme must be made sense of. Surely an instance of either wilful

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ignorance (colonialism is a thing of the past) or a case of prejudice (that is an explicit act of racial discrimination) was at fault.

Perhaps, the organisers maybe should have the benefit of the doubt. It might be possible that they thought the British colonialist themed ball was an instance of irony. After all, humour is now a suitable way to frame colonial conquest in a postmodern, post-racial society such as our own.

Yes, British Imperial expansion did leave India poorer and more prone to devastating famine (the famine in Maharashtraand, South India had a death toll of seven million). This may have been caused by destabilising traditional cropping patterns by forced commercial cropping. And although an unfortunate by-product of migration was the outbreak of cholera, influenza,

I think it’s fair to say that this theme implies a celebration of an unacceptable regime. The British Raj oversaw countless atrocities, assumed an immense sense of cultural and racial superiority, the effects of which continue to be felt to this day, and destabilised the autonomous government of India.

Colonialism is not a thing of the past nor is it something to celebrate. Creating a space for the segregation of coloniser and colonised in a contemporary context, that is, in unhinging racism as analogous to notions of structural inequality, historical experiences and anti-racist struggles in a context of irony, gives St Paul’s the unfortunate and unwanted opportunity to parade the rhetoric of race and sexism in a framework that permits an “elite” white student to feel ironically distant from the issues they parody.

Furthermore the response of the colleges has been disappointing if not dire.

With letters from St Paul’s residents unanimously defending the party in all aspects, such a reactionary response has been indicative of a bastion of elitism

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that has been blinkered in being privy to and founded in extraordinary privilege, as the inheritors of the legacy of the British oppressors. This legacy is not only distressing, but also reinforces a century of racialised power struggle. It does St Paul’s no good whatsoever to plead a petty case of “these facts are incorrect, and we have done nothing wrong” when it does not detract from the fact that the offence still stands, and the outcry is very real and legitimate.

Regardless of the decisions of the individual waiters involved, any engagement with the ‘theme’ of colonialism in such a flippant manner automatically propagates a culture of blatantly conferring benefits on one group, the group holding the party, to the active detriment and discomfort of those bearing the legacy of the oppressed.

If in the worst case scenario this goes unchecked, (even if it has been entrenched over generations), the failure of those currently in power to effectively eradicate it will have the effect of legitimising it further in setting a new precedent and lowering our standards even further. Colonialism is an issue to be understood, not celebrated or made light of.

With Honi Soit editors Bebe D’Souza and Connie Ye

The Gun Show Innocent people will continue to die until the world bites the bullet, writes Ben Brooks

I

once made the mistake of Googling “capital punishment in China”. One blog narrated the dispatch of a young Tibetan “drug trafficker” in photographs.

Characteristically martial, two wardensoldiers held her at attention over a ditch whilst the third shot his coup de grace through the back of her head. The entry wound was small, but it blew her face off in one piece – a sort of poorly-tailored Venetian mask, inlaid with bloody filigree.

That day, like today, some 1300 murders were committed worldwide. The UN attributes more than 800 to firearms, though the word “shooting” hardly causes urbane westerners to recoil in disgust. Culturally speaking, Hollywood has done more to normalise guns than any lobby group. To die by the bullet is a sterile, routine event in our anaesthetised imagination.

At the time of writing, three such perpetrators stand trial in advanced, stable democracies either side of the Atlantic.

Their firearm-related victims collectively number 77. Each one died in abject terror, standing against a wall or hiding amongst corpses. Some had fist-sized holes torn through their ribcage. Others were shot in the face. Some were venerable grandparents. Others were children.

Less than a year ago, Norwegian Anders Breivik took a Glock pistol to the island of Utøya, calmly lodging a bullet in the heads of 69 Labour Party youth followers, with a modal age of 18. A month ago, American One Goh took his semi-automatic handgun into university, executing seven peers: one in a long line of campus massacres. Mid-April, charges were also laid against George Zimmerman of Florida, the vigilante killer of 17 year old Trayvon Martin.

And against this milieu, Australia commemorates the sixteenth anniversary of the Port Arthur massacre, with its 35 person body count, as the NSW Government wrangles with some sixty gangland shootings in Sydney.

Were the war against firearm crime to be won with sentimental portraits of human suffering and civil chaos, gun control lobbies would wield the proverbial howitzer, and inexhaustible ammunition.

But reality suggests otherwise. With mass murderers in sleepy Scandinavian cities, executioners shooting up bastions of learning and enlightenment, and bikie turmoil on our doorstep, it is appropriate to reflect on the place of firearms in the first world and, occasionally, their tenacious stranglehold on government policy.

Ownership as a Right: Pleading the Second All roads lead firstly to Washington: with 270 million private firearms, the United States holds almost half of all civilian firearms worldwide. A strong manufacturing industry, permissive legislation, lax regulation, and the constitutional conception of a right to bear arms has given the country an absurdly deadly reputation. On average, 85 people die by the trigger each day, and gun-related homicide and suicide constitute the second and third most common causes of death in African-Americans aged 15-34.

Put another way, the same number die this way each month, at the hands of other citizens, as in the combined September 11 attacks.

The infatuation with firearms can be traced, in part, to corporate interests and the arms industry. Domestically, smallarms manufacture is worth a considerable US $3 billion, between 5400 companies.

Internationally, Dr David Smith of the United States Studies Centre places the value of exports at US $20-35 billion, “depending on where wars are being fought”.

Astraddle this military-industrial complex sits the National Rifle Association, US $35 million richer since 2005

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courtesy of corporate donations. With 4 million members representing 100 million shooters, the NRA wields incalculable political influence across party lines. Their agitation lost Al Gore his home state, among others. Dr Smith recalls West Virginians explaining their abandonment of the Democrats in 2000, “ever since Bush repeatedly visited the state and warned them that a Democratic administration would want to take their guns away”. Even President Obama, liberalism incarnate, holds an F-rating with the Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence

“The same number of people die by shooting each month, at the hands of other citizens, as in the combined September 11 attacks.” for ceding to NRA demands over firearm carriage aboard trains.

The NRA Civil Rights Legal Defense Fund tests the limits of the Second Amendment in court. Suits against President Clinton’s Brady Act, regulating handguns and mandating background checks, saw elements of the objectionable check-clause voided by the highest court of the land.

Other cases were more influential.

District of Columbia v Heller (2008) and McDonald v Chicago (2010) categorically affirmed “self defence” as a justification for firearm ownership under the Second Amendment. The Supreme Court further concluded that “the American people have considered the handgun to be the quintessential self-defense weapon” and that legislation prohibiting handguns in the home is manifestly unconstitutional. [continues p12]

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The most armed states in the USA

The top five states with the highest concentration of gun ownership per capita, taken from the FBI’s National Instant Criminal Background Check System, performing checks on gun buyers at the point of sale.

Kentucky Population: 4,314,113 Gun transaction background checks per 100,000 residents: 134,038 (December 2009 - May 2010

Utah Population: 2,784,572 Background checks per 100,000 residents: 30,315

Montana Population: 974,989 Background checks per 100,000 residents: 25,745

Wyoming Population: 544,270 Background checks per 100,000 residents: 22,827

Alaska Population 689,473 Background checks per 100,000 residents: 22,273

But successful advocacy relies on heated rhetoric, in an already explosive political climate. Amply demonstrated by the 2011 shooting of Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords, high office is not invulnerable to the mixture of bullets and bile. At their recent annual meeting in St Louis (incidentally the third most violent city in America) Vice President Wayne LaPierre fired grapeshot at everything from ObamaCare, to secularism, to Michael Bloomberg (co-founder of Mayors Against Illegal Guns). The Secret Service, he argued, are the start of civic oppression, and “when the lights go dark... the first thing we’ll do [is] – get my family and GET MY GUN!” Against this unyielding political militia, firearm regulation has evolved sporadically at state level, with little national coherence. The Geneva-based Small Arms Survey notes that in Florida, semi-automatic firearms are almost entirely unrestricted, with similar arrangements for handguns in California. Only two states ban the carriage of concealed weapons outright.

Automatic firearms are permissible in many jurisdictions, occasionally requiring federal registration. But the NRA legacy means that the feds have little power to force waiting period, background check, and registration requirements on its fireand-brimstone subsidiaries.

To put these observations in perspective, recall the lobby shoot-out scene in The Matrix. With some modifications to barrel length, every one of the wallshattering, Kevlar-piercing, space-timedistorting weapons in Neo’s ludicrous arsenal is – somewhere – legal.

Frustrated by a powerful lobby and delicate state-federal relations, preventative legislative reform is difficult to accomplish. The only measures which enjoy broad-based support involve increasing mandatory sentences in the hope that, ex post facto, the tragedy of one serves as a deterrent to all. Academia holds these policies to be of questionable merit, but in any case they too suffer from wild inconsistency. First-instance possession of a prohibited weapon can elicit maximum punishments between USD$10,000 and life imprisonment from state to state.

In a culture saturated with guns, subject to a sclerotic control regime, it is not surprising that Oikos University, California found itself under attack in April, like Fort Hood, Virginia Tech, and Columbine before it. One disaffected shooter with locally sourced weapons can inflict inordinate suffering.

The recent death of Trayvon Martin,

the young black man who faced injustice in a gated community, is not unexpected.

A majority of states subscribe to the stand-your-ground “castle doctrine”, authorising deadly force to repel assault, intimidation, and robbery, often without imposing any duty to first retreat. The NRA calls this a “common sense right”.

An overzealous Neighbourhood Watchman, self-righteous if not malicious, acted cruelly in reliance of this policy. It will form the basis of his defence against second-degree murder, and it was the reason prosecutors took more than a month to level charges.

On the other hand, the same prosecu-

“Recall the lobby shoot-out scene in The Matrix. With some modifications to barrel length, every one of the wall-shattering, Kevlarpiercing, space-timedistorting weapons in Neo’s ludicrous arsenal is – somewhere – legal.” tors were more zealous in sending black mother-of-three Marissa Alexander to prison in May. She discharged a single warning shot at the wall of the family home against her husband. Rejecting the self-defence arguments protecting Zimmerman, the judge reluctantly imposed the mandatory jail sentence: 20 years.

Responses to these incidents say much of the mentality across the Pacific. In our correspondence, Dr Smith noted that whilst appalled, many West Virginians argued that Virginia Tech would never have occurred, had students been permitted to bear arms on campus. The Small Arms Survey points out that a year later,

Armed and dangerous

Countries with the highest gun murder rates as of latest available data (2002) - data not available for all countries

in 2008, a district board in Texas unanimously voted to allow teachers to carry firearms into the classroom. And in the aftermath of the Trayvon Martin protests, the NRA has boldly declared that abolishing Stand Your Ground laws “leaves the innocent in danger... [for it] deters wouldbe murderers, rapists and robbers”.

These attitudes are akin to mutually assured destruction. At a minimum, it should suffice to note that Trayvon was not a murderer, rapist, or robber. He was a black youth between 15 and 34. But with significant commercial interests at stake, the fifty-plus legislatures irreconcilably divided, and a pseudo-revolutionary mental complex militating against regulation, the US shows little inclination to reform.

The Crim de la Crim: Licensed to Kill It is easy to deride this star-spangled anomaly, and foreign observers express incredulity at their laissez-faire approach to gun control. Comparatively, gun crime abroad is a non-issue. Comparatively, Europe and Australia embrace some of the most stringent firearm laws in the world.

Comparatively, murder rates are, well, incomparable.

Nonetheless, as Anders Breivik moved methodically around his island, shooting children and reshooting corpses (just to be sure), he quickly surpassed the death toll of any “comparable” stateside gun massacre. Stunned by the audacity of this massexecution, Norway was dragged from the recesses of our geographic consciousness and thrust ignominiously into the spotlight, to answer the question: “how?”

Norway was an inherent contradiction: a country sporting one of the lowest homicide rates in Europe, but with one firearm for every three people, and the seventh largest arms export industry. Notwithstanding some judicious prohibitions on automatic and high-power weapons, the balance was decidedly delicate. But in many respects, regulations mirror our own: ownership licences require a “genuine reason”, and the weapon must remain concealed and locked. Moreover, police have the right to inspect owners’ homes for compliance.

Aware of these obstacles, Breivik first sought to buy assault weapons in the Czech Republic. Europe, like America, suffers from inconsistent, uncoordinated policy making. Unsuccessful, he returned to try his luck by the letter of the law in Norway. Arch-villain and megalomaniac, he details the scheme in plain manu-

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script. 2083: A European Declaration of Independence chronicles his registration with gun clubs, as early as 2005, to “increase my chances of obtaining a Glock, legally”, and how he undertook three months of pistol training “to fulfil the government requirement for purchase”.

semi-automatic handguns. Samantha Lee of the National Coalition of Gun Control explains that federal-state tension was largely to blame, and that “it would have been extremely difficult to obtain the NAF if handguns were included.”

If the distinction means little to you, consider that semi-automatic handguns were the weapon of choice for Breivik, Goh, and Zimmerman. The NSW Greens firearm spokesman, David Shoebridge, notes that handguns are used in 90 per cent of drive-by shootings – almost always a semi-automatic – and they have increased by a quarter in the past six years.

Tellingly, chillingly, he also writes: On the application form I stated: “hunting deer”. It would have been tempting to just write the truth; “executing category A and B cultural Marxists/ multiculturalist traitors” just to see their reaction :P Wholly oblivious, the government licensed him to purchase an assault rifle, “handy and affordable” according to its American manufacturers, and a semiautomatic pistol. Like One Goh and George Zimmerman, they too were legally sanctioned. With more than a little irony, Breivik would later quip, “I envy our European American brothers as the gun laws in Europe suck in comparison”.

“The death toll from small arms in most years greatly exceeds the toll of the atomic bombs that devastated Hiroshima and Nagasaki.” - Kofi Annan The gang-on-gang violence in Sydney is of the drive-by, handgun variety. There is no doubt the weapons are illicitly procured.

But what of their origin? Though the Liberal Party and Shooters Party maintain that illegal importation fuels the frenzy, the Australian Institute of Criminology suspects that a number of domestic legislative loopholes are responsible. For ten years in Queensland, “deactivated” handguns were permissibly deregistered, with thousands then reactivated by enterprising cartels.

Out of Sight, Out of Mind, Out of Danger?

Breivik’s crime was premeditated to a degree no reasonable legal system could pre-empt. But the Utøya experience should resonate with Australia’s own chequered history.

Norway’s low homicide rate and strict legislation meant that firearm crime was pushed to the periphery of politics.

Gun control here is similarly becalmed in the doldrums of public apathy – a remote non-issue pursued in peacetime by the professional left. The debate only emerges when that peace is punctuated by crisis: until then, reforms lack the impetus to overcome resistance from interest groups, other jurisdictions and an ambivalent, complacent public.

The slaughter at the Port Arthur convict prison stimulated one such development. Since the Liberal Party took the uncharacteristically liberal step of buying and banning a fifth of our civilian guns under the National Agreement on Firearms, Australia has experienced no such massacre (four or more fatalities). There were 13 in the 18 years before Port Arthur. Firearm suicides plummeted and the number of firearm-owning households was halved, with a commensurate decline in firearm domestic violence.

But the NAF was a reactionary policy.

35 people remain quite dead.

It was also limited in scope. The ban applied to semi-automatic longarms of the type used by Martin Bryant, but not

regardless of the law. On this point, the firearm lobby is quite right. Small-government non-intervention or nanny state coddling, police, and paperwork cannot suppress

Above right: A defiant Anders Behring Breivik as he enters court on trial for the alleged murder of 77 in last year’s Norway shooting spree Below: Breivik is led into court Opposite page: Trayvon Martin, the 17 year old shot and killed at a gated community in Florida, on February 26

The university’s own Associate Professor Phillip Alpers argues that theft remains a significant source too. Each year, 1500 firearms are stolen from licensed owners. Almost all are pilfered from private residences.

The Sporting Shooters’ Association of Australia is a partner in the new O’Farrell Firearms Consultative Committee, established to address the violence in Sydney. Exceptionally cooperative with this article, NSW executive director Diana Melham nonetheless advocates a nebulous police-oriented, judiciallypunitive approach to legislation which, whatever else it does, leaves law abiding owners alone.

But however they are sourced, almost all these guns have licit beginnings. The problem cannot be solved by ignoring legal owners, as if they are hermetically sealed from the firearm economy. The UK reacted to the 1996 Dunblane Primary School massacre with a near-total handgun ban, though it came at the expense of some 18 kindergarteners. The NSW Greens’ demands for a semi-automatic ban here are comparatively modest.

Perhaps too modest.

If this sprawling portrait of global firearm regulation teaches us one thing, let it be that haters gonna hate, killers gonna kill,

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the violence. But too often, the law has enabled rather than prevented. Of all western massacres these past forty years, four-fifths of the victims died over the barrel of a legally acquired firearm.

Closer to home, recall the 2002 Monash University shooting. Huang Yun Xiang, or ‘Allen’ as he was known to friends, attended regular target practice, held a handgun licence and bought his five pistols from licensed retailers. In the eyes of the law he too was a legal owner with a “genuine reason”. He also killed two economics students.

Against this litany of woe, the only argument supporting recreational (as opposed to vocational) ownership rights is sport. But participation in club shoots is not contingent on possessing a private arsenal of self-chambering weapons, though the two issues have been woefully conflated. Ms Melham’s analogy of a golf player owning golf clubs is thoroughly unconvincing. Besides, as 1996 demonstrated on two continents, blanket bans do not destroy sporting cultures.

Guns don’t shoot people – people shoot people. But guns make the outcome ever more certain and ever more lethal. The past year has been instructive enough – a narrative of legislative myopia and irresponsible concessions to covetous enthusiasts. Policy must develop ahead of crime rather than behind it.

Control lobbies struggle nonetheless to make civilian firearm possession a compelling issue. Armed bikies might provoke a faint sense of unease, but history suggests that it will take a catastrophe-proper to initiate any meaningful national dialogue.

As gun ownership climbs to pre-Port Arthur levels, reflect on the suffering of a single homicide and the words of Kofi Annan. “The death toll from small arms…in most years greatly exceeds the toll of the atomic bombs that devastated Hiroshima and Nagasaki,” he has said.

“In terms of the carnage they cause, small arms indeed could well be described as weapons of mass destruction.” HS

~

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Culture Vulture POP CULTURE

Instagram: repainting our world?

Instagram is an enlightening and humanising way to share the lives of others, writes Raihana Haidary In the fast paced digital age where new social networking sites and phenomena emerge on a weekly basis, one app has transformed the concept of ‘capturing life through pictures’. Instagram, a play on the word ‘instant’ and ‘telegram’, was described by Forbes magazine as a company with no revenue, but with soul. It allows users to capture images on their iPhone and immediately share them with friends, but not before editing them with artistic vintage filters, to of course transform ‘images’ into ‘memories’.

But it is the emergence of Instagram users who describe themselves as photo journalists and visual storytellers that epitomises the application’s true success story.

Visual storyteller Sion Fullana (@sionfullana) captures haunting yet mesmerising images of individuals in the secluded alleyways and streets of New York City.

His series of images ‘Love in Uncertain Times’ captures the hope in protest, providing a unique glimpse into the ‘Occupied’ streets of Manhattan. His images require no words, but are nevertheless accompanied by telling stories of protesters who feel ‘we’re nothing but players pretending at a Big Game. And we dress up as one while using the tools of the other.’

He paints a picture unseen by tourists, using the ‘Inkwell’ filter to effectively capture and thus humanise the plight of the average city worker immersed in a book on the Subway. He colours the image of elderly couples

against a black and white background to give meaning to the concept ‘love knows no age’. Using the tools of a free iPhone app, and a limited number of filters and blurring tools, Mr Fullana adds dimension to what are perceived to be common daily occurrences.

He is not alone. Though not as popular as Mr Fullana, Theodore Kaye (@_meanwhile) places new emphasis on the word photo journalism. His array of powerful images of the citizens of Tajikistan captures the inhumanity of humanity. His simple image of an old lady kneeling in front of a Mercedes Benz, exhausted by her work with head in hand powerfully captures a land of striking wealth disparity.

Not all images are distressing. The irony behind the image of Tajik shepherds resting on sand bags while one uses his phone’s GPS system to coordinate a search for a sheep missing from his flock represents the power of photography in its commentary on our world today.

Indeed these users remind us of the importance of Picasso’s statement that art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life. The beauty of this app lies in its ability to add, new perspectives on objects and beings that are not immediately appreciated by the naked eye.

Credit: Theodore Kaye (@_meanwhile)

Credit: Theodore Kaye (@_meanwhile)

In an age of notifications and instant chat, Instagram has effectively equipped and inspired its users to search for the beauty in a sky littered with clouds, and to capture the joy of a young child devouring ice cream on a sweltering summer’s day.

Credit: Sion Fullana (@sionfullana)

REVIEWS: THEATRE

GIVEAWAY

SUDS Presents: The Lonesome West SUDS debutantes shine as Patrick Morrow grabs a pint

Father Roderick Welsh (Aaron Cornelius) is something of a weak link, which, though an uncompelling actor, does not work against his character.

His lack of conviction (religious, or as a stage presence) complements an unholy dependence on drink and his successive spiritual crises. Awkward and uncertain, Cornelius is a victim of the play’s amusing and blunt critique of a particularly violent and indifferent brand of distinctly Irish Catholicism; a self-immolating, self-medicating wretch, he is to be pitied accordingly.

Quintessentially Irish, and perversely fraternal, Martin McDonagh’s The Lonesome West, as envisaged in the co-op directorial debut of SUDS’ Hal Conyngham and Eleanor Harrison-Dengate, is darkly hilarious in a way only the Irish can be. Stoves, statuettes, and potato chips take centre stage in a play, set in an uninsured house by a lake in rural Leenaun, dripping with violence and misery of the most abject kind.

Focused around the relationship (perhaps too generous a word) between the unbelievably juvenile pair of brothers, Coleman (William Campion) and Valene (Charlie Jones), the two struggle to subsist in a maudlin world which very clearly doesn’t care. For all their similarities, the two are equally dark but distinct. Campion’s malice, dominance and apparent seniority plays superbly against the ever-so-slightly-more innocent, if equally sadistic performance by Jones, who brings a cruelly brandished

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knife to a fraternal gunfight.

The script’s strong grasp of the absurd and farcical is an asset capitalised on by the whole cast, but by the brothers especially. Their comic timing, where required, is spot on and the humour (despite its darkness) is welcome punctuation to what would otherwise be an offensively miserable narrative; leaving you laughing against your will at snappy dialogue and a Pinter-esque obsession with the arbitrary in the face of the significant.

Girleen (Lucinda Vitek) is an unconventional (not-all-that) feminine foil to, and welcome relief from, the hypermasculinity of the brawling brothers. Her brash, womanly charm works, not unlike the poitín on which Coleman and Valene depend, as a burning anaesthetic. Lucinda stands as the closest thing the play has to a voice of reason, and adequately articulates the closest feelings the play has to love.

As part of celebrating the 2012 London Olympic Games, Honi Soit, has three copies of Granta 119 to give away, thanks to Allen & Unwin.

There are moments where some characters’ accents become difficult to understand, certain ominous pauses suggest a disappeared line and the teching was unrefined and poorly coordinated.

However, all but the first of these, I feel, can be attributed to the performance reviewed being but a first dress rehearsal.

Since 1979, the quarterly publication Granta has showcased the best writing from emerging talent and established authors. Each edition tackles a different theme or issue. As well as publishing works from renowned authors, Granta is a platform for budding creatives.

If you can empathise with any of the characters, you deserve pity. I suspect everybody will, though. The triumph of this play and this performance is its disappointed presentation of only slightly exaggerated, regular human beings. It’s hard not to walk away feeling a little bit Irish, and a little bit impressed. The show is feckin’ brilliant.

The current edition is a celebration of the past, present and future of the people of Great Britain. The works highlight human interactions within the context of historical and contemporary Britain.

The Lonesome West Wed 6 June - Sat 9 June 7pm Cellar Theatre $2 - $5

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The first three people to email Honi Soit and correctly tell us what Queen Elizabeth is celebrating this year and why will win a copy of Granta 119: Britain. Please provide your full name and mailing address so we can send you your prize during the holidays.

Email honisoit2012@gmail.com

Culture Vulture CANNES FILM FESTIVAL

Captured by Cannes Brad Mariano on the sights, sounds, and successes of THE film festival As the biggest event in world cinema comes to a close, a few notable themes emerged at this year’s Cannes film festival – Twilight lead actors taking on adaptations of respected American novels, promising young directors faltering on their second or third films, and Michael Haneke cementing his stature as a great artist with a critical standing and body of work unparalleled in contemporary cinema.

For the most part, however, it was somewhat lacklustre. It had a solid line-up of films, but somewhat thin in the end after rumoured projects from the elusive Wong Kar-Wai and Terrence Malick failed to materialise in time and many straight up disappointed the rabid masses of critics, where every film had pratically hundreds of 140-character reviews doing the rounds on the Twittersphere before the credits stopped rolling.

It lacked the fanfare or controversy of previous festivals, certainly nothing as memorable as Lars von Trier’s Nazi sympathising in 2011, or Lars von Trier rebutting the criticisms of Antichrist with “I’m the best director in the world” in 2009, or even Lars von Trier flipping the bird to everyone, abusing the jury, and storming out of the awards ceremony because Europa only won second place in 1991.

The selection of films in competition did come under heavy criticism however, as 22 of 22 films selected were from male directors and while the Festival’s directors defended this with standard politically correct rhetoric, it is indeed an alarming figure that needs to be highlighted for future festivals.

But now that the festival is done and dusted, what is there to take from it all?

Well, the great films that were on show, and the prizes awarded by the small and idiosyncratic jury headed by figures as diverse as Nanni Moretti, Ewan McGregor and fashion designer Jean Paul Gaultier.

As soon as Haneke’s Amour screened half way through the festival, it was clear that the coveted Palme d’Or was his to lose – the bleak and moving story of the relationship and love of an octogenarian couple tested as the wife is on her deathbed was the only film that critics unanimously loved, a film reportedly more personal and emotionally engaging than the Austrian’s often more detached and cerebral films like The Piano Teacher and Hidden. The only mark against it was the fact that the top prize had been given to Haneke just three years earlier for The White Ribbon, but “love prevailed” and Haneke joined a very elite club of double winners and is the only person to have won the top prize with consecutive films.

“It lacked the fanfare or controversy of previous festivals, certainly nothing as memorable as Lars von Trier’s Nazi sympathising in 2011.”

Other prizes were less predictable – Matteo Garrone’s Reality disappointed most after his promising crime drama Gomorrah, yet walked away with second prize and Ken Loach’s record-setting eleventh film at Cannes drew a muted reaction but third place. More polarising still was the Best Director award to Carlos Reygadas for Post Tenebrae Lux,

This years festival was dedicated to Marilyn Monroe 50 years since her untimely death

a film that had been called “pretentious” and “self-conscious”, and considered far below the high reached with his 2007 Silent Light.

Despite a near unprecedented number of Western films at the Festival, few made much of an impact. John Hillcoat’s (The Proposition) prohibitionist Western Lawless and Lee Daniels’ (Sapphire)The Paperboy were widely disliked. Walter Salles’ adaptation of Kerouac’s On the Road with Kristen Stewart was received well, as was Andrew Dominik’s Goodfellas-esq Killing Them Softly with Brad Pitt and Wes Anderson’s Moonrise Kingdom (the opening film of the festival) but none had a real shot at the big ones.

The only American film to have great success was not even listed for the main competition – it was the apocalyptic post-Katrina drama Beasts of the Southern Wild which won the Camera d’Or for Best First Feature for Benh Zeitlin.

Celebrated big name auteurs also had intriguing showings – Cronenberg’s adaptation of Don DeLillo’s Cosmopolis with Robert Pattinson, French New

The musical we had to have again

The Verge Festival is back and bigger than ever. Verge is the flagship event of the University of Sydney Union and we want you to be involved. This year’s theme is ‘Compulsory Fun’ and we intend to live up to it.

This small-scale production is more than a banana republic, writes Michael Koziol

The production will be directed by 20year old UTS student Amy Lester, who was only four when Keating was voted out, and stars 21-year old Macquarie graduate Andrew Jackson in the title role. Ms Lester said Keating! was a great show for her directorial debut.

“Because it’s small scale, you can work with the cast really intimately as performers,” she said. “I think it’s just

a fantastic musical: it’s hilarious and it’s really witty. We’re probably the only country that could make a musical about a politician that people actually come and see.”

Keating’s much-loved predecessor, Bob Hawke, will be played by Jordan Shea from the University of Notre Dame, and Ryan O’Donnell of UTS will star as the show-stealing arch-nemesis John Howard. Ms Lester said Hawke’s character was particular fun to play around with.

“He’s like the drunk uncle at Australia’s family reunion. We had such a ball workshopping [opening number] My Right Hand Man the other night.”

Ms Lester said the show’s rightsholder, David Spicer, was delighted that a group of young performers wanted to put on a production of Keating! She imagines the show will resemble “what the wharf revue would have looked like in 1996”.

All in all, there were some very interesting films shown proving that important, original and challenging cinema isn’t on life-support just yet – the only sombre note is how few of these films will ever get a theatrical release over here – 2010’s Palme d’Or winner, the beautifully poetic Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives never showed over here, and last year’s celebrated Once Upon a Time in Anatolia is only just now showing in Australia, and only on two screens nationwide, neither in Sydney. So keep a close lookout for these films mentioned, and at the very least, there’s always torrents.

Submissions for Verge now open

PREVIEWS: MUSICAL THEATRE

This month TimeOut magazine suggested Sydney had reclaimed the title of Australia’s cultural hub, and it is not hard to see why, with small production companies like Kore Productions popping up. This group of young drama enthusiasts, aged 15 to 30, promises to bring a new light to the amateur theatre scene in this city. Its first production, with four Sydney University students in the cast, will be Keating! The Musical, Casey Benetto’s 2007 love-letter to our former and arguably best Prime Minister.

Wave icon Alain Resnais’s (just shy of his 90th birthday) You Ain’t Seen Nothing Yet and Abbas Kiarostami’s Like Someone in Love all had fans and detractors.

Perhaps the most memorable film from the festival was the bizarre Holy Motors from Leos Carax that apparently was so inventive and wild it needs to be seen to be believed, and was the only real perceived contender to Haneke’s throne, yet Carax walked away empty handed.

Keating! Not pictured: The Musical

Sydney University students Peter Hoekstra-Bass (Gareth Evans), Caillan McKay (Cheryl Kernot), William Nelson (Gough Whitlam), and Toby Rosengarten (John Hewson and Alexander Downer) also star in the eight-person cast.

Keating! The Musical July 3 to 7, The Sidetrack Theatre, Marrickville

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We want to see your fresh ideas, crazy concepts and absurd dreams come true. If you have an idea for an event, program or installation, let us know.

We are now taking expressions of interest and submissions for the 2012 festival so if you are interested in transforming your campus and invigorating student life contact us today!

Submissions close June 30 Lauren Eisinger & James Colley 2012 Verge Festival Directors October 3-12, 2012 verge@usu.usyd.edu.au

honi soit

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TECH NEWS

Tech & Online

Kickstarter: fund amazing creativity

Anyone can help make creative projects a reality, reports Joseph Wang Kickstarter is a ‘crowdfunding’ website that allows anyone to sign-up and pitch almost any sort of creative endeavor and collect money, called ‘pledges’, from individuals who are interested in seeing that vision come to fruition. These creative projects cover a wide range of hobbies and interests, such as the $1.4 million raised for a ‘Elevation iPhone Dock’ or the $3600 raised last month for an ‘Birds of Finland’ art project, painting the native birds of Finland.

‘Birds of Finland’ has raised over 3600 dollars to fund an artist’s residency

The donations each user makes toward a project are split into tiers based on amount contributed. The project creator can specify various perks for various levels of contribution. In most cases there is a tier where you can pre-order the actual product; other benefits can range from limited editions to ridiculously exclusive experiences, such as VIP passes, personal performances, and lunch with the creators.

The site works on an all-or-nothing funding model, meaning a project must meet its funding targets within the 90 day limit, or no money from the pledges is charged. This helps to take a little of the risk out of giving money to some random stranger on the internet, or having to follow through with a halffunded project.

Kickstarter, despite having launched in 2008, has only recently managed to gain notable mainstream traction. Last week, dark cabaret performer Amanda Palmer (of the Dresden Dolls) used Kickstarter to raise over $1 million for her upcoming solo album, after splitting from her record label. Earlier in the year, game developer Double Fine raised $1 million in a single day (finishing funding at $3.3 million) for a new point-andclick adventure game. Design company Pebble Technology gathered over $10 million for their e-ink “smartwatch” that will be able to display messages from a smartphone.

‘Pebble Watch’ project rasied over $10 million to produce this e-ink watch that can also show messages from iPhone and Android phones

Other Kickstarter projects have now become major commercial successes. The Olloclip 3-in-1 fisheye/wide-angle/macro lens for the iPhone started off with 1300 backers on Kickstarter, and is now sold in the Apple Store. ‘Cards Against Humanity’, the politically incorrect, self-dubbed “party game for horrible people”, had 758 backers, and is now consistently defeating the likes of Lego and Nerf guns near the top of Amazon’s best-seller list.

to complete their brief. In July 2011, Seattle-based ZionEyez raised around $300,000 for a pair of video recording glasses, but ultimately underestimated the costs, and could not deliver. As Kickstarter doesn’t enforce refunds, the backers of this project were left seething and out of pocket. In another bizarre example, a project was cancelled before the funding due to inappropriate content; it was a satirical Japanese ‘tentacle rape comic’ card game.

It is not always a case of lofty ambitions though - most projects are small, in the realms of music and film.

Almost half (46 per cent) of all projects make their targets, raising about $1000 to $5000 each.

Despite these seemingly small dangers, Kickstarter remains one of the most exciting places to be discovered as a project creator, and discover new and exciting projects to support. From pseudo-cyberpunk action comedy films to mocha-flavour coffee cubes, there’s really no end to weird and wacky things that are possible with people-power.

However, there is a risk that the makers of a successfully funded project won’t follow through, or are unable

A documentary film about the design of cities, ‘Urbanised’, raised $118,000

The new era of music consumption

Christopher J. Browne test-drives Spotify, the streaming app giving you access to over 15 million songs Spotify gives you free access to an online library of music streamed to your computer. The service is ad-supported, with audio and visual ads occasionally playing between songs. For many this is a price well worth paying, but for those who can’t bear it you can upgrade to the ad-free Spotify Unlimited for $6.99 a month.

On top of this basic music streaming service, Spotify has a bunch of cool features to help you get the most out of your music listening. At its core Spotify is highly social, boasting a live feed of what your friends are listening to and listings of popular tracks in Australia or worldwide. You can also recommend tracks to friends or collaborate on playlists.

Spotify allows anyone to stream a catalogue of over 15 million songs to thier PC or phone

Online music streaming in Australia has faced a shaky start. First there was Pandora, shut down due to copyright legislation. Now Spotify looks set to join ‘rdio’ and the upcoming ‘MOG’ in giving users access to a treasure trove of music.

Having never used a music-streaming service at length before (I basically only ever listen to MDNA on loop), I decided to dive in and give Spotify a try.

After months of false starts, the Swedish service has reached our shores.

Launched in Australia on May 22, Spotify offers free access to over 15 million songs from your computer - provided you’re happy to put up with a Macca’s ad every now and again. Spotify boasts over 10 million users worldwide, and if my Facebook feed is anything to go by, it is looking to be a hit here too.

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honi soit

Spotify is also tightly integrated with Facebook - if you choose, the current song your friends are listening to will show up on their Facebook profile under Recent Activity, and if you click on the cover art for the song it will start playing in Spotify. For that occasional sneaky One Direction session you can switch into Spotify’s private mode which lets you listen to your embarrassing music collection without sharing it with your friends.

One of Spotify’s strengths is the ability to create a ‘Radio Station’ based on

track or artist (similar features exist in most music streaming services). Once you create a station Spotify will stream music that is similar to the track or artist, which is a great way to find new music that you might not have otherwise.

During my time using Spotify, I’ve spent the largest amount of my time using this feature and listening to new music.

The rest of Spotify’s features are available only for subscribers to Spotify Premium, for $11.99 a month. On top of an ad-free stream, Premium users are able to stream to mobile devices (currently available for iOS, Android, Symbian, Windows Phone, Palm, and Blackberry).

You can also synchronise playlists to your computer or mobile device, for listening when out of range of an internet connection. Premium users can also stream music at a higher bitrate, offering better quality audio — 320kbps compared to the usual 160kbps.

Spotify is already popular worldwide, and is looking to grow in Australia.

However, there are a few factors that could limit its adoption. In a country like Australia where unlimited mobile data plans are rare, users may be concerned about using the streaming service on their mobile devices. As an example, an average monthly mobile data plan of 2GB would allow one to stream Spotify for less than an hour a day — assuming that you didn’t use your data plan for anything else but music streaming.

#honitech

Another factor is artist availability: not all popular artists are available through the service. Some artists and labels have pulled out amid concern that services such as Spotify damage traditional sales, and that Spotify does not pay independent artists enough. Late last year UK musician Jon Hopkins notably tweeted: “Got paid £8 for 90,000 plays. Fuck spotify”.

There are many instances of similar negative views online, including several misleading infographics that suggest an artist would need to have over four million hits per month on a a single track in order to make minimum wage.

Many of these views are based on inaccurate calculations, especially given that the amount of money artists earn from individual plays in Spotify fluctuates over time based on a number of factors, and figures on exact values are not published online.

Critics of Spotify’s model also fail to take into account the increased exposure of artists through Spotify which, ideally, would lead to increased record and ticket sales.

Inherently social: Spotify has Facebook share functionality built-in and allows collaboration within the app

Action-Reaction SCIENCE

Saltwater crocodiles develop a taste for sharks Felicity Nelson pits man-eater against man-eater

An adult salty can launch its entire body vertically out of the water to catch prey and can deliver more bite force than a T-rex with a snap of its jaws. Crocs are quick learners and can track the habits of their prey, waiting for precisely the right time to strike.

Australia is home to some of the most deadly creatures in the world. We boast a healthy population of baby-eating dingoes, one of the world’s most toxic spiders, a scary number of tiny but lethal box jellyfish, and (if that hasn’t made you cancel your trip) even our furry national icon, the platypus, produces a painful toxin. Amongst this nightmarish collection of dangerous animals there are two particularly nasty creatures that regularly have humans on their lunch menu: sharks and saltwater crocodiles.

Saltwater crocs are normally around 4m long, but they can grow up to 7m.

Saltwater crocs kill an average of two people every year in Australia. Nowhere is the threat more pronounced than in the NT where over 150,000 individual saltwater crocodiles patrol the coastal river systems. Crocs are becoming such a public safety concern that the NT Government is planning to ease the ban on trophy hunting of adult crocodiles to assist population control.

In a nation of beach-junkies maneating sharks pose an obvious problem.

There are three culpable species: the bull shark, the tiger shark, and the great white. This means man-eaters can range from 2-6m long and have up to 50 teeth at the front of their mouth and 5-6 rows

Sharks and saltwater crocodiles are the kings of Australian waters and two of the many awesome terrors found in the country. It seems ironic to be passionate about something that wants to eat you, but these powerful creatures really deserve to be admired.

SPORTS UPDATE University sports stars are hitting new highs, writes Kira Spucys Tahar so while play is in progress, complete silence is required in the venue. Ms Blow is currently undertaking a B. Arts/ B. Education and is one of six athletes selected in the Australian team.

The London Olympic Games will have a strong University of Sydney contingent with over 20 athletes from various disciplines expected to be chosen to represent Australia. The 2012 Olympic Games will start on July 27 and will be followed by the Paralympic Games starting on August 29.

At the 2008 Beijing Olympics the University of Sydney was represented by over 20 current and graduate students. It is expected this year’s squad will match or better that number. Not all sports have finalised their teams and more student athletes are expected to be announced as part of the Australian contingent, including up to ten rowers for the Olympic and up to three swimmers as part of the Paralympic squads.

All athletes heading to London are either current or former Elite Athlete Program (EAP) scholarship holders.

The 10-strong Olympic diving squad will feature two University of Sydney students after Matthew Mitcham and Loudy Wiggins were named as part of the team. Currently undertaking a Bachelor of Arts, 24-year-old Matthew Mitcham will defend his 10m platform diving Olympic championship after he won gold in Beijing.

Loudy Wiggins, a Bachelor of Arts (Media and Communications) graduate, will be only the second Australian to compete at four Olympic Games when she joins her partner Rachel Bugg in the 10m platform synchronised diving event. Ms Wiggins was a three time SUSF ‘Sportswoman of the Year’ award winner during her time at University, and won bronze in Sydney and Athens.

Joining Jessica Fox (Women’s K1), as part of the canoe/kayak contingent, are graduates Kynan Maley and Murray Stewart. On his Olympic debut, Mr Stewart has qualified for four events in the men’s kayak programme and must

London last hosted the Olympics in 1948.

now decide which events he will contest in London, likely only two. Mr Maley is also on debut at the London Olympics and will compete in both the single and double slalom canoe events.

Cyclist and University of Sydney graduate, Kaarle McCulloch, will make her debut at the 2012 Olympics in London after being named as part of the Australian track cycling team. She will compete with fellow Australian Anna Meares in the women’s team sprint. At this year’s world championships, the pair won silver after a narrow defeat to their German competitors.

Master of Commerce student Edward Fernon will represent Australia in the Modern Pentathlon. Mr Fernon qualified at the end of 2011 and was the first University of Sydney Business School and Sydney Uni Sport & Fitness scholarship holder to qualify for the London Olympics. Mr Fernon trains seven days a week in order to master the elements of fencing, freestyle swimming, showjumping, cross-country running, and pistol shooting required for his event.

With regard to the Paralympic squad, Jennifer Blow has been selected as part of the Goalball team for the London Games. Goalball is a sport invented in 1946 designed exclusively for athletes with visual impairment. The object of the game is to roll the ball into the opposition goal while players try to block the ball with their bodies. There are bells inside the ball to help orient the players,

Slow Loris

behind (too many teeth for comfort.)

Large saltwater crocodiles aren’t fussy eaters and will make a meal of practically anything they can get their teeth into - goannas, kangaroos, toads, and even Bengali tigers (on occasion). As it turns out, they also have quite an appetite for sharks. Recently a number of saltwater crocs have been observed hunting bull sharks in Darwin Bay and Kakadu National Park. Five fishermen found themselves having to fend off a croc to protect their prize shark catch at one point. It seems the Northern Territory will soon have one less hazard to worry about if the croc population keeps growing.

SYDNEY STUDENTS OFF TO LONDON

FREAKS OF NATURE

It is highly likely an in-form Sarah Stewart will also join the Paralympic squad, and be selected this week as part of the Australian wheelchair basketball team that will compete in London. Ms Stewart was part of the team that took part in the official London Paralympic qualifying tournament in South Korea last year. Last week Ms Stewart, who is currently undertaking a PhD in Philosophy, showed impressive skill as part of the silver medal winning team at the Paralympic World Cup in Manchester. If she is given a spot on the team, this will be Ms Stewart’s third Olympic Games after winning silver in Athens and bronze in Beijing.

WALLABIES TRAINING SELECTION Five members of the Sydney University Football Club have been named as part of the Wallabies 39-man training squad for the June tests. Dave Dennis who is undertaking a Graduate Diploma in Commerce, and Bernard Foley, who is completing a Bachelor of Economics, are both Sydney University Elite Athlete Program (EAP) scholarship holders.

The three other men, Berrick Barnes, Ben McCalman and Nick Phipps are all former scholarship recipients. All five currently compete for teams in the Super Rugby competiton; Barnes, Dennis and Foley for the Waratahs, McCalman for the Western Forces, and Phipps for the Melbourne Rebels.

Wallabies coach Robbie Deans will announce his 23-man team on June 3 ahead of the Wallabies v Scotland test on June 5 in Newcastle. There are a further three tests, this time against Wales, including a match on Saturday June 23 in Sydney. It is hoped there will be a strong University of Sydney presence as part of the team.

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Richard Withers can’t find anything he would like to tickle more Known for their great looks and playful nature, the slow loris will win hearts quicker than George Clooney.

The five species of slow loris are found predominantly in regions from northeast India through Indochina, east to the Sulu Archipelago, and down as far south as the island of Java. In other words, they cannot be found in Australia.

Despite their harmless appearance, slow lorises are omnivores that will eat anything from small birds to a wide range of reptiles. In captivity, however, their diet is far broader, catering to a perceived hunger for most fruits along with dog food, raw horse meat, and a nice variety of freshly killed chickens, mice, and young hamsters. Apparently they find that hamsters become less appetising the older they get.

Slow lorises absolutely love to be tickled, happily raising their arms in hopeful anticipation when there is even the slightest inkling that an opportunity will present itself.

Beware the loris, however, for they possess a toxic bite. This toxin is produced as the result of licking a gland on their arm and then mixing the secretion with saliva, activating a less-than-deadly but very effective deterrent from common predators. This will also cause mild to moderate swelling in humans but will do little to put off Sun Bears who have taken a particular liking to the slow loris.

While the slow loris may be unbearably charming, they are not legal to own as pets, a fact that continues to generate considerable dismay amongst legal-primate lovers the world over. Due to harvesting for the pet trade and a loss of its natural habitat, the slow loris has suffered a 30 per cent decline in its population over the past two decades.

This endangered species does not fare well in captivity, meaning the preservation of its natural habitat is all the more important.

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SRC Reports SRC President’s Report

president@src.usyd.edu.au

It’s your money, so tell the Uni how to spend it, writes Phoebe Drake

Phoebe Drake: This is the only funny photo we could find

Welcome to the final edition of Honi Soit for semester one. It coincides, inevitably, with impending exams, late night caffeine binges, and new and varied forms of procrastination. For most of you, hopefully, all this should go according to plan, but unfortunately things sometimes happen that have a serious impact on how you perform in your exams. In instances where something does go wrong, it is important to remember that the SRC is here to help and can guide you through the process of appealing an unfair mark, grade or other academic decision.

All you need to do is call us on 9660 5222 to make a (free and confidential) appointment with one of our caseworkers - Charlotte, Mel or James; (Breda if you are on a satellite campus).

students across the nation face the same issue. Commonwealth Supported Places for Summer and Winter School equals choice and equity for students, as it opens up a variety of avenues in which students may choose how precisely to complete their degree. It also recognises that student life is not always hanging around in cafes but that, occasionally, students will fail a subject and may need to study through the break in order to catch up. It is hardly fair that a student must firstly pay for the subject they failed, and then retake the subject paying three times the amount instead. Additionally, for those balancing a hectic work/study schedule, it may be easier to study consistently throughout the year.

The lack of Commonwealth Supported Places restricts this.

And unfortunately, there is limited capacity for change until the next federal budget is handed down next May. It is important, however, that students, student organisations and the National Union of Students agitate for change around this issue in order to secure a more accessible and equitable form of education.

The SRC: making it easier to get into winter school

SSAF: SETTING THE PRIORITIES STRAIGHT Just recently the University emailed all students with a survey link, asking for students’ thoughts on where the Student Services and Amenities Fee should be spent. It is incredibly important that as many students as possible take the time

It is important to make sure the University does more than simply tick the boxes required by federal legislation.

Your say in the SSAF survey (at the link below) can help keep the University accountable and the process for distributing the SSAF as transparent as possible.

It has indeed been a big semester for the SRC with more members joining the SRC in O Week than ever before. We have also seen the biggest rally in Australia since VSU with over two thousand staff and students marching together in protest of the proposed staff cuts at Sydney University.

The SRC will be up and running as per usual during the holidays and will also be at Re-O Day. So if you haven’t joined yet, you will be able to visit us on Eastern Avenue to pick up a show bag and become a member.

On a final note, congratulations to all candidates and campaigners in the USU elections. Being in my fourth year, I have seen many passionate people come through the process of running for

Vice-President’s Report

Re-O Day: The SRC’s stall will be just as fun as this, so come pop by

Go online and have your say in the SSAF survey: surveymonkey.com/s/XHX729M Phoebe Drake is the SRC President Twitter: @srcpresident

Stopping the cuts: The SRC has been hard at work with NUS.

vice.president@src.usyd.edu.au

Tom Raue has actually done some work, he promises have actually done. Several people have requested a “genuine” report, so here goes.

with our rallies, sit ins and other actions but there is more to be done. Watch this space next semester.

I have renewed the relationship between the SRC and the faculty societies.

Part of the vice president’s job is to liaise with these societies (SASS, SULS etc), but in the past this role has been ignored.

Tom Raue: Editing policy makes him a happy man

I have removed approximately 43,000 words of irrelevant policy from the SRC’s policy documents. We are supposed to be a lobbying organisation, so we need concise and up to date policy, plus easy to understand guidelines for running the organisation. I am currently writing new policy, including a pushing for a greater focus on drug activism.

Most of my reports have been dedicated to critiquing the SRC in order to better it, rather than reporting on what I

I have been an active member of the Education Action Group, which has organised the campaign to fight staff cuts.

We have already won significant victories

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election for the Board of Directors for the USU. This was a particularly strong year and the commitment and enthusiasm from all involved was inspiring to watch. Best of luck to all those elected, and I am looking very much forward to working with you all over the course of the year.

Student consultation is required by legislation and the survey currently being conducted is the first part. The second component will be when the University reports back on the priorities listed by the students for the areas in which the SSAF should be spent.

The SRC has also run the Honours Survey, collecting over two hundred responses, and the National Union of Students Quality Survey, which saw four hundred students send in their thoughts on the quality of education at Sydney University. These responses will help the SRC greatly when lobbying the University on issues in this area.

WINTER SCHOOL: WORTH THE COST? Many of you may elect to fast track or catch up on your degree by taking a Unit of Study at Winter School. One thing will be immediately apparent - it is expensive. Very expensive. Whilst the costs of your place at Winter School are deferrable to your HECS-HELP loan, it is not a Commonwealth Supported Place (CSP). This means the government does not subsidise any of the cost of your UoS, as it does during the semester. Ultimately, this disadvantages many students who find it too costly to undertake any study during the break and are forced to opt for an additional semester, or year, instead. This is something that should be addressed, as

to respond and, in their responses, highlight the value of student organisations.

As this year’s transitional approach to the SSAF concludes, it is essential that students note the value of our services, such as casework and policy, our legal service and student representation, in order for us to continue and expand these services.

I am currently working on reforming both the structure and election process of the university senate, in conjunction with others on the SRC and the Sydney University Postgraduates Association.

As well as all of this I attend executive meetings to make day to day and financial decisions, council meetings for

major decisions, and student consultative committee which includes the vice chancellor, deputy vice chancellor, and representatives from the USU, SUPRA, and SUSF. I sit on committees to hire or review staff.

So there you have it. A brief summary of what I’ve been up to this semester.

Next issue I’ll get back to criticising the SRC because that’s more interesting than me tooting my own horn.

Tom Raue is the SRC Vice-President

For more information about the SRC, visit www.src.usyd.edu.au honi soit

@honi_soit

SRC Reports General Secretary’s Report

general.secretary@src.usyd.edu.au

It’s a hack party and everyone’s invited, writes Tim Matthews

Tim Matthews: Comrade, General Secretary, selfidentifying hack

The campus is sure to be a lot quieter this week – no chalking everywhere, no tripping on A-Frames on Eastern Avenue, no being escorted to and from the train and each and every class. Yes, the Union Board election is over for another year. My congratulations to Hannah, Tom, John, Karen, and Sophie, whom I look forward to working with over the next six months in the SSAF negotiations. Of course as one election ends, it is the perfect time to start talking about the next one! (cue audible groan from members of the student community)

This Wednesday night the SRC Council will consider a series of electoral reform proposals relevant to the upcoming SRC elections in September (depending on whether you are reading this on, before, or after Wednesday both the tone and relevance of this article may be dubious – but it is important stuff to talk about… so bear with me!).

First thing is first – what actually happens in these elections? In truth, they are actually four elections in one (SRC President, SRC Council, Delegates to the National Union of Students, Editors of Honi Soit). The rules of the election are determined by Council, and enforced by an Electoral Officer (or if shit gets REALLY real an external Electoral Legal Arbiter). Here is a short summary of the motions being discussed for your information (noting the sticky politics of a discussion like this, I have tried to pull these summaries verbatim from the motions, and do not intend to pass judgement one way or another in this article):

• A ‘closed campus’ motion, which seeks to prohibit those who are not “enrolled as a current student at the University of Sydney,” from campaigning in SRC elections.

• Two amendments providing for a period of up to two working days from the close of nominations in elections for candidates to correct technical errors in their nomination (SIDs entered incorrectly, etc.)

• A reduction in the maximum expenditure by any one group of candidates from $1,000 to $300 • A cap (at 7) on the number of groups that any one ‘brand’ may submit in the SRC elections and an alternate motion which instead limits the number of tickets which contribute to the ‘spending cap’ of a particular ‘brand’ at 7.

David Pink: Self-referential

Instead of reporting back on what I’ve done this week, I thought I’d take a look back at the report of the President of the National Union of Students (UK) from 1973, Digby Jacks. It’s astounding to see how far discourse about higher education has shifted.

The future of student representation is now under active debate. We have to take stock of the progress achieved and decide on a policy for the future. Essentially, there are three policy options:

(3) The extension of student representation combined with a simplification and democratisation of college government.

This line of development, which I personally favour, would allow students to

The Stop the Cuts report

• Stronger prohibitions against national office bearers of the National Union of Students campaigning in the SRC elections.

All of these motions are potentially significant to you (if you are a prospective candidate), and certainly to the governance and operation of the SRC. Some are also particularly contentious. I would encourage you, if you are interested in the electoral regulations of the SRC, or have an interest in running yourself, to attend the meeting on Wednesday at 6pm in the New Law School.

PS. Good luck in your exams!

Tim Matthews is the SRC General Secretary Twitter: @Tim_Matthews

education.officers@src.usyd.edu.au

This old discourse ain’t what she used to be, writes David Pink

(2) A complete recasting of University and college government on the basis of one-person one-vote. This would in effect allow students to control the educational institution and would also isolate institutions from the committees in which they exist and society in general. The result would be extended mass meetings of students and staff making occasional forays into the surrounding community with the institutions essentially isolated as academic ivory towers.

• Stronger prohibitions on harassment during campaigning

• More extensive provisions for the Electoral Officer checking material distributed during an election, including empowering the Electoral Officer to deny the distribution of material

Education Officers’ Report

(1) To withdraw altogether and adopt an explicitly ultra-trade union approach, on the principle that student representation is tantamount to absorption into the administration and that the college authority is either essentially hostile or an integral part of the State apparatus.

considered “sexist, racist, queerphobic, abilist, misleading or deceptive”

have a greater say in decision-making, but there would be a limit to this, given the nature of the other interest groups involved and the crucial relationship between education and society. It is essential that people in general are more actively involved in institutional government. It is not sufficient for boards of governors to be conveniently stacked with the captains of industry and local government worthies.

It’d be nice if we still lived in a time where you could propose decorporatising a university and have some expectation that it’d happen. In our day and age, restructuring the university would have amazing consequences: imagine how many of our problems would be solved if we replaced the Vice-Chancellor with Phoebe Drake (elected on popular mandate by the students) and Derrick Armstrong as Deputy Vice-Chancellor with Tom Raue. Staff cuts would be gone.

Lectures would be recorded. Defunding Sydney Uni Sports and Fitness would

be a reality. We could take money away from the Murdoch-controlled US Studies Centre and axe ‘disciplines’ like ‘research accounting’ (how to count money better?) and we’d have world-standard class sizes (that’d be one-on-one, like Oxbridge).

I’m well aware there’s no way in hell we could turn the University into a student-run utopia, but it’s nice to think that people once struggled to have one.

This was a time when people invested a lot of energy into direct actions and rallies, marches and sit-ins, pickets and strikes to democratise their schools, their workplaces and their political parties. It’s a shame that Sydney University here and now can’t have its ruling oligarchy overthrown, but I know there are a bunch of student organisations on campus that could start reflecting the interests of their membership more closely.

David Pink is an SRC Education Officer

An SRC Books exclusive

STOP THE CUTS!!! writes Rafi Alam

Get your books cheap!

The first cut is the deepest so STOP THE CUTS!

STOP THE CUTS!

Scissors, paper cuts, and cold cuts: all to be stopped Rafi Alam is on Twitter: @rafialarm

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“

SRC Help SPECIAL CONSIDERATION: What to do if something goes wrong.

If you’re sick for an assessment or examination, you can apply for special consideration to avoid ramifications. The SRC provides help with advice.

Special Consideration What if I am sick for an assessment or examination? Is there any way to not get a fail?

You can apply for a Special Consideration. Go to the website for your faculty and download the application form.

See a doctor and get your Professional Practitioner’s Certificate (PPC) completed. This needs to be on the SAME DAY that you are sick and should not be backdated. Unfortunately this does mean that if you are very sick you cannot stay at home and wait until the next day to go to the doctor. Your doctor should also give a brief description of the things that you are unable to do, eg, attend university, leave bed, sit up for longer than 10 minutes, etc.

If you have a valid PPC, and the doctor has assessed that you are severely affected or worse you should almost certainly be granted special consideration.

Remember Special Consideration is not for an ongoing condition. It is for an unexpected illness or an exacerbation of an ongoing condition.

What if I am sick for the supplementary examination or every assessment in a subject? Is there any way not to get a fail?

Part 5 of the Assessment and Examination of Coursework Policy is about Special Consideration. If you have something extraordinary happen, such as an illness or something else that seriously

affects your studies, you can apply for special consideration so that you are not disadvantaged. There is a special consideration form that you must hand in within 5 working days of the deadline of exam date with supporting documentation. The faculty will then decide if they approve special consideration and if they do what adjustment they will make – eg.

Reschedule the exam for another date. (If the faculty does not approve your special consideration application decision you can appeal this decision. Speak to SRC HELP for more information. You must lodge an appeal with 15 working days, or 3 weeks.)

If they reschedule things, but you are too sick (for example) to attend any again, and you apply for special consideration each time and your applications are approved each time, you should not receive a fail. This is new as a result of a change in policy.

Policy says (5.6.1.6): “The Enrolled Student, because of further illness or misadventure may be unable to attempt the replacement assessment within the specified time, of the Faculty may be unable to construct a valid form of assessment. In such cases, the Faculty will, where reasonable, determine alternative means of assessment. If this is not possible, the

”

Faculty will award a grade of DNF to the student.”

A DNF is a Discontinued, Not Fail.

This is what should show up on your transcript. This says that you discontinued the subjects and you did not fail it.

Compared to a Fail (or Absent Fail or Discontinued Fail), a DNF is good for your transcript and good for your Annual Average Mark and good for your Weighted Average Mark (WAM).

SO if you can’t do any of the assessments in a subject this semester, or in the future, and you have successfully applied for special consideration EACH TIME, then check that your mark is recorded as a DNF. You should also apply to have a refund or recrediting of your fees. Ask at the faculty office or the SRC for the appropriate forms.

Ask Abe Hi Abe, A friend from my home town says that people at their uni can travel back home for the holiday break for free on the trains. Do you know anything about that?

North Coast Hi North Coast, If you are on a Youth Allowance dependent (away from home) payment or if you are part of a Centrelink couple where you have to live away from the family home because of study Centrelink will give you a “Fare Allowance”. This is a reimbursement (you pay first) of the cheapest and most practical mode of transport to and from your family home. You’re entitled to this payment for each semester of study you attempt.

Abe

If this does happen to you, come and speak to SRC HELP about applying for your fees back for the affected subject/s.

Call 9660 522 to make an appointment.

To make an appointment to see a caseworker: help@src.usyd.edu.au.

Phone: 9660 5222 Or come and see us at: Level 1 (Basement) Wentworth Bldg - City Road Entry For more information:: www.src.usyd.edu.au

For undergraduate Sydney Uni Students

FREE legal advice, representation in court and a referral service to undergraduate students at The University of Sydney.

• Immigration Advice • Tenancy law • Credit & debt • Discrimination & harassment • Traffic offences • Criminal law • Employment law

• Credit and debt • Administration (gov) law • Victims compensation • Consumer complaints • Domestric violence • Insurance law • University complaints • And more ... please ask us

Students’ Representative Council, University of Sydney Level 1 Wentworth Building, Uni of Sydney 02 9660 5222 | www.src.usyd.edu.au | ACN 146 653 143

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@honi_soit

FREE

We have a solicitor who speaks Cantonese, Mandarin 法律諮詢 & Japanese

法律アドバイス NEED a Justice of the Peace?

Our solicitor will certify documents & witness statutory declarations Appointments Phone 02 9660 5222 Drop-in sessions (no appointment needed) Tuesdays & Thursdays 1pm-3pm Location Level 1 (basement) Wentworth Building, City Road, Darlington

THE QUIZ

SUDOKU

1. Nairobi is the capital of which African country?

2. What do the films Prometheus and the 1979 film Alien have in common?

How much dirt is in a hole that is 3 ft deep, and 6 inches in diameter?

3. Prince Philip will turn 91 this week, how old is Queen Elizabeth II? 4. Pb is the official abbreviation for which element?

5. Who are the two host nations of the 2012 Euro football championships?

TEASER

6. “But, in spite of these deficiencies, the wishes, the hopes, the confidence, the predictions of the small band of true friends who witnessed the ceremony, were fully answered in the perfect happiness of the union”, is the final line from what famous novel?

TARGET

7. Leukophobia is a fear of what?

8. Elvis Presley’s song ‘A Little Less Conversation’ featured in the opening credits in which of the following TV shows A) Las Vegas B) One Tree Hill C) Two and a Half Men

9. Name one of the current members of the boy band, New Kids on the Block?

10. At what Summer Olympic Games were members of the Israeli Olympic team taken hostage and later killed by the Palestinian group ‘Black September’? Name the year and city.

A

e

D

R

N

G

U R D

KENKEN

Make as many words out of the letters above, always including the letter in the centre.

20 = Super.

33 = Supercalifragilistic.

11. What do the following words have in common: scribe, claim, active, portion, vision, create.

41 = Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.

12. After 10 rounds of the 2012 AFL Premiership season, who is currently first on the AFL ladder?

13. What film, in terms of theatrical revenue, is the current recordholder for the highest grossing film of all time?

14. Casino Royale is a novel written by which author?

15. Which famous Indian author and activist said “Flags are bits of coloured cloth that governments use to first shrink wrap people’s brains and then as ceremonial shrouds to bury the dead?”

16. How many capital cities does South Africa currently have?

17. In what year was president John Fitzgerald Kennedy assassinated?

18. Who, along with Enrique Iglesias, sung the famous duet ‘Could I Have This Kiss Forever’?

19. Which of the following is a prime number?

A) 77 B) 91 C) 101

20. In what state was bushranger Ned Kelly born in 1878?

Answers below

KenKen tips: 1. Numbers can not repeat in any row or column.

2. The puzzle is split into boxes called “cages”.

3. In the upper left-hand corner of each cage is a target number and a mathematical sign indicating how the numerals within a particular cage interact to produce the target number.

CROSSWORD

Each clue points towards two different words which diverge by one letter only. For example, ‘Talk to man’ could be either CHAT or CHAP. The rejected letters from the Across solutions can be combined to make BRR! TRIM DEFT COD. The rejected letters from the Down solutions can be combined to make MOCK-UP A COSTUME.

ACROSS

DOWN

8. Get too hot to eavesdrop (8)

1. Assess the worth of desert (8)

9. Removes orders (6)

2. Giving thanks for being elegant (8)

10. Vote for subatomic particle (8)

3. Certainly, Ghoti is Bigfoot (4) or (3,1)

11. Purpose is to move away from the margin (6)

4. Hot day has a barb (7)

12. Placid baby cow (4)

6. Central mess (6)

13. Clairvoyance is supporting physics (10) or (3-7)

7. A stimulant for nuclear energy (1,5) or (6)

14. Lie down and drop off (7)

16. Breaks the blinds (8)

15. Deconstruct insubordination (7)

17. Theoretical state (8)

19. Getting smaller and folding again (10)

18. Throws away correspondence (7)

22. Opposed to insects (4)

20. Lure the whole (6)

23. Said to be sitting down (7)

21. Grassed on the degenerated (6)

24. Grip part (8)

25. Mountain range belonging to Alf (4)

5. Winsome to be viewing (2,8) or (10)

13. One who pushes a beggar (10)

26. Wind to get colder (6) 27. Postponement recommendation (8)

Please direct any questions or complaints to ghoti.cryptic@gmail.com

Ghoti

Answers The Quiz: 1. Kenya 2. Both were directed by Ridley Scott 3. 86 4. Lead 5. Poland and Ukraine 6. Emma by Jane Austen 7. The colour white 8. A) Las Vegas 9. Options include: Jordan and Jonathan Knight, Joey McIntyre, Donnie Wahlberg and Danny Wood 10. Munich 1972 11. Placing ‘pro’ before each one makes a new word 12. West Coast Eagles 13. Avatar 14. Ian Fleming 15. Arundhati Roy 16. Three- Bloemfontein is the capital of the judiciary, Cape Town is the legislative capital, and Pretoria is the administrative capital 17. 1963 18. Whitney Houston 19. C- 101 20. Victoria Brain Teaser: None. A hole only has air in it, no dirt.

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The Sandstone Report College Cultcha with Damo ‘Donger’ Thomson do at Col, but hey – I met a fucktonne of hot first year chicks! It’s an untapped market out there boys! Those ladies are ripe for the picking! So anyway, me and the boys reckoned we’d do some ‘charity work’ and bring the spirit of Col-Col to youse uni cunts, and pick up some slammin’ hotties while we were at it.

G

’Day fuckos!

Dong-dong

here again, for me last column of semester! It’s been a fucking sick one, ay! I know some of youse muggles haven’t liked me that much, and some of me mates at Col were pretty pissed that I was talking about college to youse cunts (see ‘St Paul’s Responds’, p3 – Eds.) but hey, everyone should know we’re all fuckin’ legends at College hey! Plus if we don’t let you shit cunts know what you’re missin’ out on how else would you know we’re better than youse?

After the Union kicked me out of the race last week, I figured I should find some other way to get involved in that ‘uni life’ thing. Not that I have much time outside of the millions of things we

So Ripper came up with the idea of a ‘Men’s Society’. After all that union shit went down some people on the College & Sick cunts committee (Clubs & Societies – Eds.) weren’t keen, but we showed ’em! We said that if there was a society for chicks, then men should have one too! I mean, how can we have gender equality if we don’t hear from us blokes? Plus we’ve got a fuckin’ sick track record on this kinda shit at College! Do you know we even let a chick be Senior Student once? It was an accident, all the blokes who were meant to be running forgot the election was on and were too pissed to after a Rawson win to make it. Though Ripper apparently still rocked up only to vomit on the lectern and piss himself. Legend!

Also, did you know chicks on campus even have a whole room to themselves! (Me and Ripper just found this

Ripper was spewin’ when he found out he didn’t get Senior Student

out – we reckoned it’d be a great place to go have a perv but it’s all underground and shit, so there’s no windows.

Fuckin’ shit outta luck, hey!)

In any case, our new men’s society will be a place for the boys to talk about ‘gender equality and gender-specific issues on campus’ (Ripper talked to his dad, he reckoned these words needed to be in the description somewhere…

And I’m not going to argue, I’m no fucking lawyer, hey!). He also made us put some bullshit in about “being open to any male-identifying person”, which is apparently chicks who want dicks or some shit. Not the kinda chicks who want dick at old Col-col though, right?

Fuck yeah! Pussy!

What Donger and me mates want youse all to do is to come down on Friday, get on your merch and support the boys – for real! How else can we chat about the hottest birds on campus, putting chicks away, the best way to down piss, and about generally being fucking legends?

Speaking of, one last thing before Dong Dong goes to the SUBSKI snow trip for the holidays and leaves all you

The Women’s Room sounds fuckin’ sick!

LifeChoice, that’s my choice!

H

ello Children!

Tracy

reporting in for… my report. As I write this, the end of semester is fast approaching. My, how the time has flown! Only three months ago I was just a fresh-faced freshman Tracy, hopelessly naïve and lost in the big bad university world. Since then I’ve drunk multiple schooners of beer at

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the Manning House, joined a political party, and even run for Union Board!

I’ve learnt a lot, not just about media and communications but also about life.

For example, I can now say with almost utmost certainty that not all gay people have AIDS, the staff cuts are a bad thing for the entire university community, and that the people who write for HBO are among the most talented individuals in the world. So wise, Tracy, so wise. My only concern has been that I feel there are no more life lessons to be learnt here, beyond the various practical media skills I’m yet to study. What could be more educational than chaining myself to the Vice-Chancellor’s desk? Q has politely assured me that there is still plenty to learn: I haven’t been in a revue yet!

Oh, how lucky I’ve been to have Q. I owe him so much. Without him, I’d just be another run-of-the-mill first year ‘chick’, indulging in non-social drinking off campus and saying nothing in tutorials, as well as failing generally to get anything out of university beyond the

occasional doting look from a boy or lecturer - not that I’d want any with my Rodney around! He’s a jealous sort.

No, with Q’s help I have risen above my “gender” (the uni word for “sex”) and boy am I glad for it. So many possibilities have arisen.

Just last week a group from my university Bible study class and I started a new club on campus. It’s called LifeChoices, you might have heard of it. People are so excited about LifeChoices that it made the news!

It has also become big on the web-osphere, there is a lively debate on the Facebook, and our ‘page’ has almost 3000 posts, although many of them are simply propaganda posts from the ill-informed. My LifeChoice ‘Pro-Life 4 Life’ fellow believers and I have all rallied because people need to know that once you decide to make a life, that decision is with you for life. You don’t have a choice. I was voted in at the AGM as the ‘LifeMother’, which is like

@honi_soit

cunts until next semester. The Rawson Rugby VD was last week – the last of the semester (and the fucking best, hey!)

– and ol’ Donger here totally scored!

Ripper reckons some chick totally wants some Dong in her! Fuck yeah! (see ‘Ode to Donger’, p3 – Eds.) I was getting looooooose, singlehandedly beating the seniors in a boat race (competitive team drinking – Eds.), then some rando chick came up and told me I could fingerbung her on the DF cos she wasn’t wearing no undies. Fuck yeah. Then some chick started cryin’ who was hookin’ up with Ripper but not like normal cos he hadn’t even fucked her yet. Weird shit. Anyways cunts, I’ll see youse all at the meeting and not on the snow trip, povrats!

Cheers cunts!

Donger also wanted us to advertise his college’s upcoming ‘informal’ but after we politely refused payment in the form of “VBs, fResher chicks, and a case of rumbos”, we said we’d plug it at the end of his column instead. So keep your out for the Terra Nullius party next semester - Eds.

a Vice-Presdient. My position description is to “promote my blatantly sexist and outdated religious views to the nonbelievers”.

The only person who doesn’t seem so impressed is Q. He’s actually been acting quite strangely since he found out I helped get LifeChoices off the ground.

I thought he’d be quite happy with me, starting my own society and everything.

But now whenever he sees me he mutters something like “monster… monster… I’ve created a monster”, with a crazy look in his eye, to which I respond: “Now Q, I don’t know much about this monster but if it’s what I think it is, you must see it through.

Abortion is out of the question.”

The joke is that the monster is a beautiful unborn baby. Q never laughs.

Personally I think it’s a miracle, I didn’t know that gay men could give birth.

See, I’m still learning about these sorts of things.

Experiences that mean the world

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www.law.unimelb.edu.au/jd honi soit

18/04/12 12:23 PM