May–June 2010 by The Tattler

page 3: IHS Helps Haiti

page 10: BASEBALL PREDICTIONS

page 5: Senioritis: It’s Real

SENIOR SUPPLEMENTS 2010

page 8

June 9, 2010 • Estd. 1892 • Vol. 17 • No.8• Published Monthly • www.ihstattler.com • Ithaca High School, 1401 N. Cayuga St., Ithaca, NY, 14850 • FREE

By MADDIE HALPERT

ICSD Budget Cuts a Swath

PHOTO/PROVIDED

Departments throughout IHS have been affected by budget cuts as given in the Ithaca City School District (ICSD) 2010-11 budget proposed by the ICSD Board of Education (BoE), which was passed in a public vote on Tuesday, May 18. Although the overall budget involves a 2.3 percent increase from the 2009-10, it has still included cuts throughout the district. According to English Department Chair Shirley Kennedy, the English Department will be losing 1.2 full-time equivalents (FTEs). As she described, each 0.2 loss represents the loss of one class period, and 1.0 is a full-time teacher. The department will respond to the cut by not hiring a new teacher to replace Moira Lang, who currently teaches Advanced Placement (AP) English Literature and Woodlands Individualized Senior Experience (WISE) wjo will be retiring at the end of the school year. Instead, English teachers Jean Amodeo and Christopher Byrne will take AP training this summer and teach AP English Literature starting in 2010-11. Kennedy also explained that the incoming freshman class will be small-

er than the last, so some sections will naturally be cut. She said that the English department as a whole supports cuts to electives over increasing class sizes. “Students cannot write as many papers and receive the necessary feedback nor can they have the ‘speaking’ time they need for assessment if the classes get any larger,” she said. In addition to these adjustments, Kennedy added that another teaching position might have to become parttime. Math Department Chair Todd Noyes said that the Math Department will be losing at least one teacher due to the budget cuts. However, he also said that “the changes for next year will be spread throughout the department,” leading to fewer sections of AP classes, and larger class sizes. The World Language Department was asked to cut four sections, according to Department Chair Janet Abowd. “The department agreed not to support the elimination of any language,” Abowd said. The department sought an approach that would guarantee French, German, and Spanish through the AP level and offer Chinese and Latin as elective languages. Abowd explained that in order to do so and to meet minimum enroll-

ment requirements, the department recommended several adjustments to the current system. The department plans to increase enrollment in Honors Spanish 3 while reducing Latin I by one section. French 4 Language and French 4 Communication will be combined into one course, as will Ger-

man 4 and German 5/AP. According to Abowd, the combined German course will be taught using an A/B course rotation which will be developed by IHS German teachers over the summer. Such a model has already been adopted by other school districts, said Abowd. She explained that “In year one, all stu-

Future Leaders for a Day Take Capital

By JADE FANG

walking them through the process of the creation of a bill, to instill in them the idea that in the fuTwo students from IHS were chosen from ture they’ll be the ones making the difference. thousands of applicants to participate in the 20th Johanna Demey ‘10 and Dayanna del Rio ‘10 Annual Angelo Del Toro Puerto Rican/Hispanic trained for many hours over a period of months Youth Leadership Institute in Albany. Angelo Del to learn how to be legislators and to discuss topToro was an assemblyman from New York City ics such as multilingual labeling of prescription and founder of the institute in 1991. One of his pill bottles. They spent a weekend in workshops, missions was to empower the Latino youth by receptions, and of course the mock assembly session to debate the five bills, most of which concerned education and language. One bill was about lottery profit and how it should be used toward education (which is already the current law), another about multilingual prescriptions, and another on a bill for multilingual public professionals to receive higher pay. For many students, this experience was not only informative but inspirational as well. When asked what she got out of the institute, Demey replied, “The institution made me feel that I’m not the only one, that I have the opportunity to become something. I love knowing that there’s a huge LaPHOTO/PROVIDED tino community out there and we can

continued on p. 3

all help each other to achieve something. I met so many people from so many different backgrounds and the networking opened my eyes.” She added that, “Before the conference I wasn’t sure about my plans after graduating from high school because I got accepted to a couple different schools, but this weekend really gave me a better understanding of where I wanted to go, and made me [happy] with my decision of going to the State University of New York at Buffalo.” The institute was also a place for many who grew up in Spanish-speaking households to get over their fear of speaking English to an audience. “It does make a difference in their lives, especially as Latino students. If you don’t speak one language at least you understand the other; it’s a flow of English and Spanish voice. And there’s also a connection between students. Students from all parts of the world - from South America, Central America, so on. How empowering it was to have all those students present, so many communities represented, and so many voices coming together and becoming one,” stated Maria Torres, who attended the institution herself 20 years ago when it was just founded, and won a scholarship as a senior. continued on p. 4

June 9, 2010

Editorial: It would be in the best interest of the country if the Deepwater Horizon oil spill lasted for as 2010-11 long as possible. In fact, if BP’s efforts went awry and oil gushed at Editor-in-Chief a much faster rate, that would be Jade Fang ‘11 even better. History shows that editor@ihstattler.com only in the wake of large environNews Editor mental disasters is environmental Larry Ge ‘11 progress both in public awareness news@ihstattler.com and political action achieved. The 1969 oil spill off the coast of Santa Features Editor Barbara, California, is the main Rehan Dadi ‘11 reason why offshore drilling in features@ihstattler.com the United States besides in the Gulf of Mexico has been banned Centerspread Editor Ingrid Sydenstricker ever since. Opposition to nuclear ‘12 power similarly intensified after spread@ihstattler.com Three Mile Island in 1979. If there is no big crisis, no imArts & Entertainment mediate and visible consequence Kyle Rothman ‘11 of its actions, the public collecarts@ihstattler.com tively sees no need to change its behavior. People are, by nature, Sports Editor procrastinators; negative effects Geoff Preston ‘11 that are vague in both scope and sports@ihstattler.com date of reckoning tend to elicit Penultimate and Back Page little response. Tell people someEditor thing bad may happen in a hunKelsey Shang ‘12 dred years, and they will assume backpage@ihstattler.com no sacrifice needs to be made now; tell people something bad Copy Editor Annelise Raymond ‘12 will happen soon, and they will do everything they can to help copy@ihstattler.com Photography Editors

Christina Seung ‘12 Mansi Vohra ‘13 Anna Gill ‘11

layout@ihstattler.com

Webpage Editor and Fact Checker

Yuqi Yang ‘11

webmaster@ihstattler.com

Business Manager

Jeff Setter ‘11

business@ihstattler.com

Advertising Manager

Jason Setter ‘11

ads@ihstattler.com

Distribution Manager

Jo Yang ‘11

distribution@ihstattler.com

Faculty Advisor

Deborah Lynn

advisor@ihstattler.com

e to say. you hav

r what s to: t to hea we wan l submission

r.com e l t t a t s itor form t or @ i h

emai

d to the E d. a Letter in H Courtyar p u k ic e c ffi Or p o r e Tattle utside Th

Editorial:

For many years, the United States has been the only major industrialized country without a universal healthcare system. American healthcare is advanced, but very expensive and wasteful in covering basic needs. Expensive private sector-based medical treatment leaves some 40 million people without any coverage, as they cannot afford health insurance. These high costs also work against many businesses. For example, American car manufacturers cannot compete with most foreign brands because American firms have to pay higher medical costs for their workers. The need for reform to lower costs and more coverage has long been recognized. President Truman proposed reforms at the end of WWII without success. President Clinton’s administration also tried to pass reforms during the early 1990s but failed. President Obama’s Health Care and Education Reconciliation Act of 2010, which has just been passed into law, is very complex. It is a flawed result of too many concessions to legislators and lobbyists for health insurance corporations, pharmaceutical companies, hospitals, religious groups, and other special interests. There are two differing approaches to healthcare reform. One approach considers medical care as a public good; the costs of which are covered by taxpayers but whose services are offered to everyone such as the Fire Department; Most industrialized countries have such a system. The other approach is based on private-sector profit. It involves continued private coverage and treatment,

. d n o p s re edi

fend it off. A small spill such as those that have occurred in the past would likely be seen, as have others before, as an unfortunate but necessary result of our energy needs. Since a small spill does not produce millions of tar balls on beaches or thousands of oilsoaked birds, it is not photogenic and thus easily ignored by the public or, at best, quickly forgotten. An oil spill of unprecedented size will prompt legislators and citizens to ‘get serious’ on the issue of energy. Eyes cannot be averted from an oil spill of unprecedented size, nor the contaminated ecosystems and their economic impacts overlooked. Only when the average person is affected by the oil spill will sufficient interest be taken in the dirty and unsustainable sources that now quench the country’s insatiable thirst for energy. It is also to the benefit of the country’s future that this spill has occurred off the coast of several of the most strongly Republican states. Many Republicans who support off-shore drilling justify doing so by dismissing the risks as insignificant. The present oil

spill proves this not the case. Lawmakers should approve carbon-reduction plans such as the one drafted by Senators Kerry, Editor-in-Chief Lieberman, and Graham, and Maddie Halpert ’10 editor@ihstattler.com support measures that move the US from dirtier sources of energy News Editor toward cleaner ones. The latter Jade Fang ’11 does not include offshore drilling news@ihstattler.com rigs or other sources of domestic oil: the shift needed is more Features Editor radical, such as widespread use Colin Raymond ’10 of solar, wind, and hydroelectric features@ihstattler.com power. This editorial does not conCenterspread Editor Michael Migieldone the spill. Every day the oil Schwartz ’10 gushing from the sunken drillcenterspread@ihstattler.com ing rig adds to the damage to the ocean ecosystem and to the people whose livelihood depends on Arts & Entertainment Editor Lily Tagg ’10 it. But yet, every gallon of oil enarts@ihstattler.com tering the waters of the Gulf adds to the visibility of the problems Sports Editor stemming from the US consumAri Kaputkin ’10 ing 10,000 gallons of oil per secsports@ihstattler.com ond, and to the impetus on our leaders to more quickly develop Penultimate & Back Page Editor plans to wean the US from its oil Lily Sahn ’11 dependency. Great immediate penultimate@ihstattler.com damage, if it leads to a change in energy policy, is much preferCopy Editor able to the quest for oil leading to Sam Przezdziecki ’10 disaster after disaster far into the copy@ihstattler.com future. Photography Editors

Health Care Bill Suggests U.S. Political Process’s Ills

photo@ihstattler.com

Layout Editor

Oil Spill’s Black Cloudiness Has Silver Lining

but expands coverage to include almost everyone. Due to Republican opposition, President Obama’s plan adopts the second approach only, having abandoned any “public” or government-based option. It will offer tax breaks and subsidies for low-income Americans to purchase private health insurance and it will try to ensure that health insurance companies and providers extend coverage and limit costs. In return, these companies will get millions of new, government-subsidized customers. But as consumer advocate Ralph Nader recently noted, “The 2,500 [pages-long bill] is full of opportunities and ambiguities for the insurance companies to game the system and to make it even worse.” Even with these compromises, it was not easy to pass (it took almost a year of discussion) and in the end, not a single Republican voted for it. Other ways exist to offer affordable healthcare without increasing expenses, such as reappropriating the national budget. For example, the US spends hundreds of billions fighting costly wars in the Middle East, whose expenditures continue to go up. Better healthcare could be affordable for all by reducing our military spending, but this was never questioned by legislators. One hopes that this healthcare bill will eventually benefit those who cannot afford high healthcare costs. But the way this plan was compromised, by removing any public or government-based plan and by not controlling military expenditure, shows that the American political system is currently unable to see public good as its main value.

Editor’s Note: All editorials published in The Tattler are not anonymous and represent the views of the students on the editorial staff. Editorials are written about topics the Tattler staff deems important. Such issues may be global or specific to IHS.

Amy Li ’10 Rehan Dadi ’11

photo@ihstattler.com

Layout Editor

Woogeon Kim ’10 layout@ihstattler.com

Fact Checker and Webpage Editor

Larry Ge ’11

fact@ihstattler.com

Business Manager

Hannah De Jong ’10 business@ihstattler.com

Advertising Managers

Jiyoung Won ’10 Kalila BookerCassano ’10 ads@ihstattler.com

Distribution Manager

Ben Kuder ’10

distribution@ihstattler.com

Faculty Advisor

Deborah Lynn

advisor@ihstattler.com

The Tattler is the studentrun newspaper of Ithaca High School. The Tattler was founded in 1892, and is published monthly.

As an open forum, The Tattler invites submissions of opinion pieces and letters to the editor from all members of the community. Drop off submissions in H134, e-mail them to editor@ihstattler.com.

Letters can be mailed to The IHS Tattler 1401 N. Cayuga St. Ithaca, NY 14850 We reserve the right to edit all submissions. These submissions do not necessarily reflect the views of The Tattler editorial staff.

June 9, 2010 BUDGET

continued from p.1

dents will complete the ‘A’ curriculum, the following year the ‘B’ curriculum, and so on. The curriculum is designed to strengthen the same skills along a continuum using different materials for each year. Abowd concluded that the changes to the department “will provide challenges for both students and teachers. Classes will be larger and will be targeting skill improvement along a wider continuum. … We will keep open lines of communication between students and teachers, teachers and administrators, as we monitor the effects of these changes on learning.” In terms of the budget for the music, IHS Orchestra Director George Myers stated that the main area affected will be extracurricular activities. He wrote in an e-mail, “For IHS, it means that the following groups will not be supported: Jazz Band, Pep Band, the musical, Chamber (Concerto) Orchestra, Vocal Jazz, and Madrigals.” The Band, Orchestra, and Choir, which meet as classes during the school

day, would be the sole components of the music program. According to Myers, “When the cuts were proposed and voted upon, the ‘challenge’ presented to the music department was to raise the money to support them on our own, by fundraising,” a suggestion which Myers believed led to many questions and complications. IHS Principal Donald Mills commented on the BoE’s decision to cut extracurricular stipends from the budget saying “They decided literally at the last hour, probably.” Myers also noted that the Bond Project Construction on Kulp will be completed dePHOTO/PROVIDED spite these cuts. “It will really be a first rate facility, with the capability for more theater and dance as well. It is an irony that many activities that would take place in that space, and that would make it a vibrant and active building, have been cut in the 2010-2011 budget,” he said. Representatives for other departments were unavailable for comment.

“The Commander” Rules By LARRY GE

For six weeks this winter, forty Ithaca High School students and several teachers, alumni, and mentors participating in Code Red Robotics embarked on the process of creating a multi-skilled robot from scratch. These students and advisors spent a total of over 10,000 hours working in their home away from home, room E16. What exactly is Code Red Robotics? Team number 639, Code Red is one of thousands of teams across the globe that is part of the “For Inspiration and Recognition of Science and Technology” robotics program and competition, or FIRST for short. A competitive sport in the field of science and technology, every year a new game is introduced and invariably challenges participants to push their limits and to innovate new robot designs and applications, while still retaining the “fun” factor for both participants and audience. This year’s game, named Breakaway, is played by two alliances of three robots each on a 27’ x 54’ carpeted field divided into three sections by two one-foot high bumps. The objective of the game is for the robots to navigate the field over the bumps in order to collect and score points with twelve standard soccer balls. Points are earned for each soccer ball scored, with bonus points awarded to robots that manage to lift themselves off the ground during the end game using two towers placed on the game field. For four hours a day, five days a week, Code Red members were hard at work tackling the challenges of this year’s game; their efforts were definitely aided by having an incredible team. “The team this year has been exceptional,” said IHS technology teacher and team advisor, Ian Krywe. “The level of creativity and cooperation among the students and mentors this year is a great thing to see, especially among the

new members.” In those six weeks, Code Red was able to complete and compete with their finished robot, dubbed

PHOTO/PROVIDED

“The Commander”. The Commander was the result of labor and dedication, in combination with a detailed designing and planning phase. The team spent the first part of the season working on effective strategies and designs before moving into the actual prototyping and building phases of the season. Every member of the club was actively encouraged to participate in each step of the process - Jeff Setter ’11 commented, “There are always so many things that need to be done; everyone works on the robot in one way or another.” Code Red’s 120 pound robot was built with maneuverability and speed in mind, capable of being both offensive and defensive. The robot was driven by two tank treads and featured a pneumatically controlled, spinning ball kicker for scoring goals.

A special feature of The Commander was its ability to hoist itself up onto a seven foot tall bar using a powerful winch, which earned the team two bonus points in each match it was used. “It’s really quite remarkable to see everything come together so superbly in the final robot. We’ve all grown as individuals and as a team, and at the end of the day, it’s a great feeling to step back and look at the finished robot, knowing you had a hand in its completion,” commented veteran team member Anthony McNicoll ‘11. This year, Code Red Robotics competed with the completed robot in two separate regional competitions, one at the Rochester Institute of Technology in Rochester, NY, and the other at Drexel University in Philadelphia, and was successful in both competitions. At RIT, Code Red not only advanced past the elimination rounds to the quarter finals, but also won the Rockwell Automation Innovation in Control Award for their exceptionally performing kicker. At the Philadelphia Regional, The Commander qualified for the semi-finals, finishing eighth out of forty-four teams. And for the second year in a row, Code Red was awarded the prestigious Johnson & Johnson Gracious Professionalism Award, one of the top honors at the regional. Code Red was awarded this award due to their sportsmanship both on and off the field. “I’m extremely happy with what we accomplished this season,” commented team President Ben Krish ’11, “we had a strong robot, and an even stronger team.” Even though the season has ended, the team is still going strong and recently completed two fundraisers, a car wash and a LAN Party in the IHS cafeteria. “I think the real goal of Code Red is to not only build a strong, functional robot and team, but a culture of excellence as well,” stated Qasim Saad ’11.

News Brief SchoolTool Goes Rogue Calculating Averages

Shortly before the end of the first semester of this school year, IHS teachers and administrators discovered that IHS’s new Administrative Computer System, SchoolTool, calculates final course grade averages inconsistently with the system that IHS has used in the past. The problem arises because the chart used in the past has been based on a 13-point system, with each number from 0 to 12 representing a letter value from ‘F’ to ‘A+’. SchoolTool by default uses a 100-point system, but the intervals represented by each letter are unequal, thus averages are sometimes skewed. The most glaring problem is that the SchoolTool value for ‘F’ is higher than it should be. Therefore, many students who are failing classes would have a passing final average grade on their transcript according to SchoolTool. However, due to the inequality of other intervals, grades throughout the A through F scale can be averaged

incorrectly. One IHS department calculated their students’ grades both ways and found that SchoolTool raised average grades between 20 and 25 percent of the time, and never lowered them. According to IHS Principal Mills and Tim Moon, the Ithaca City School District Director of Education Data and Assessment, administrators are currently trying to communicate with SchoolTool to figure out if there is a way to override the algorithm in SchoolTool and replace it with a 13-point system for IHS. Both Mills and Moon have said that even if they are unable to find such a solution before final grades must be reported, they will be sure that the grades reported on final report cards are all consistent with how they would be calculated according to the 13-point system and the chart shown in the student handbook, even if that means calculating all the grades by hand and overriding them individually in SchoolTool. --from Staff Reports

June 9, 2010 LEADERS

write email editor@ihstattler.com

continued from p.1

“It was an amazing opportunity for me also, 20 years ago. I came here from Puerto Rico in 1988 and attended the institute in 1991. Like many other students, I was very shy of the language and afraid to even contemplate going up to a mic and discussing the bills. Never in a million years did I think I would do that, but I did. I remember vividly the discussion of “English only” and getting rid of English as a Second Language (ESL) programs, and how angry I was.” Torres went on to explain how her passion over the issue led her to take the mic and just begin speaking Spanish. “I asked them, ‘How

would you understand what I’m saying right now if you didn’t know the language?’ I realized that, wow, I can make a difference and give back to the community. In reality, looking back, politics was never my thing, though many students who experienced this institute do end up going into political science.” Torres concluded that the highlight of the institute was the sense of empowerment it gave her. “I know many students out there can benefit from this experience as well; that’s why we’re advocating for the expansion of the institution and more involvement from the Latino students,” she said.

IHS Helps Haiti By LARRY GE

In the weeks following the catastrophic 7.0 Mw earthquake that devastated Haiti on January 12, several IHS students reached out and took action to provide aid and support to the people of Haiti. IHS for Haiti was started by Daniela Bizzell ’11 and Chenga Drury ’11 as a way for IHS students to meet and to learn about how to best aid the rescue and relief efforts in the aftermath of the earthquake. When asked about his reason for joining, Alexi Bouvet-Boisclair ’11 replied, “You sit here and realize how good you have it … you really can’t just do nothing.” Alexi joined IHS for Haiti along with fellow classmates Kelvin Kim ’11 and Marcel Gremaud ’11 after planning their own fundraising concert to benefit Haiti. IHS for Haiti has implemented several fundraisers at IHS and around the community; for example, in February, collection buckets were placed in nearly all classrooms at IHS. Through these buckets alone, the club has collected over $500, over half of their goal of $1000, which they plan to send to Haiti through the International Rescue Committee in one donation. “It’s

been a really easy way to contribute, just put in some spare change,” commented James Hermanson ’11, who was quick to stress teacher involvement. “One week we collected over $60 from one teacher alone [Severin Drix] just because he made a point of passing the bucket around before class.” IHS for Haiti also participated in fundraising at the annual Ithaca Chili Festival in February, braving the weather to collect donations and raise awareness. “There are a lot of caring, generPHOTO / REHAN DADI ous people out there, you just have to find them,” commented NAME. The club raised a total of $400 through the chili fest alone. The money raised by IHS for Haiti is being donated through the International Rescue Committee (IRC). The IRC was chosen based on its commitment to long term relief as well as immediate help, along with their efficient use of financial support.

Do you secretly aspire to be a cartoonist?

nt a W our y ff o ls? w il o k h s s to wing a dr

carDt raw Tatotons fo ler! r Th

email backpage@ihstattler.com

AVID Builds Reputation By JADE FANG

PHOTO/PROVIDED

AVID, short for Advancement Via Individual Determination, is a college prep program designed to increase the number of students enrolled in four-year colleges, with those in the academic middle in mind. “It’s a program for students who are sure they want to go to college, who are individually determined to get there and to do the work it takes, and want to be a part of a class that’s very much like a team and family in which we all work together to make sure everyone accomplishes his or her goals,” said Caline Khavarani. According to MaiAn Rumney, another AVID teacher, “Students in the middle tend to get left out; we have AP and honors courses for our high flyers, and we have IAP programs, At Risk programs, and Special Ed for the other students. AVID is a program that reaches out to students who are perhaps from families where people have not traditionally gone to college, or students in a group that’s underrepresented in four-year colleges.” Students in the program take a specialized class everyday, focusing on organizational and study skills, critical thinking, motivation, tutoring, as well as enrollment in higher-level courses. On Tuesdays and Thursdays they have what they call “tutorial days,” when students come in with questions that they have prepared in advance for their weaker areas so they can build on them and have success in their classes. Selection of students for AVID is a big process. Each year, the eighth grade class coming to IHS is

filtered and screened for potential candidates. Only students who meet the GPA requirement and a mix of other factors are accepted to ensure they are the right fit and that they are not already getting help from other programs. Essentially, students are accepted based on their grades, background, and potential.

A rigorous system is in place for AVID teachers as well - they have to go through a certification process with the headquarters to show data of how their students are doing and examples of their lesson plans. Then there’s the summer institute for teachers to go through the initial training or advance to the next round of workshops in which they develop some of the best-loved teaching methods, including the fourcorners game used in social studies classes. Founded 30 years ago in California, there are already more than 2,000 secondary schools involved

with the program internationally. “AVID is a huge… I’ve met teachers from Japan who are part of the program, it’s definitely spreading and becoming common in many public schools,” said Rumney. However, with only four years of experience here at IHS, AVID is still a baby of a program with many negative misconceptions from students. According to Khavarani, “It’s not a support class; it’s more like: I really want to go to college, and I want to be in a class with other kids who want to go to college and together we’ll have fun and build a family and all go to college, and celebrate that. I don’t think anyone should look negatively at math or English lab, but AVID is not a support class. It’s more on the students’ end.” “I think it’s very unfortunate that just because it’s new people have misconceptions about it at this school. One person might say ‘oh in ten years people will know how great it is,’ but we can also try to spread the word right now that the negative ideas are not true and it’s a really a great program,” said Khavarani, who had extensive experience with AVID in her school back in California, “It’s something that’s been very hard for me to deal with here because at my old school I’d have kids begging me to let them join but I’d have to say no because it’s always full, and the second there was a kid who misbehaved, we’d drop them out and add the new kid. Students were begging to be in AVID and I would love to see it be that way here. It’s really a shame that at this school the reputation hasn’t had enough time to build and be as positive as it should be.”

SENIORITIS: IT’S REAL

By MICHAEL MIGIEL-SCHWARTZ

As I stare into my [insert any of my classes] teacher’s eyes, a small voice in my head says “I hate high school. I hate high school. I hate high school.” I’m here to try and explain why that, in some regards, is a valid statement that some little man is making. Some folks get into college as early as December 15 (early decision I). A select few, like I did this year, hear February 15 (early decision II). The rest typically receive their acceptance letters in the beginning of April. After that, it all heads downhill. Once people figure out what they’re doing over the next couple of years, the senior class’s net ability to do work takes a stunning nose dive. Once Advanced Placement (AP) Exams are over in early May, the situation only gets worse. Now why is this? For one, after being in this place for four years in a row, people are itching to get out. For the most part, you’re not meeting new people, and, for the most part, people don’t feel like they’re learning new things. Brain development from ages 14-18 is rapid. Seniors are exponentially smarter than they were when they entered high school. After four years of learning, some of which, depending on people’s interests and strengths, can feel like “forced learning,” a lot of people’s brains just want to say, “f*** it.” I mean that. I swear on my life that I am not using an expletive there just to be funny. I was watching pandas on Animal Planet the other day, and those brothers—those brothers—just sit around eating bam-

boo 24/7, munching away, doing his or her thing. I swear on my life, I found myself envying that Panda. Envying a panda, for crying out loud. I’m a human being and I wish I were a panda?! You know why? Not because I enjoy eating bamboo, though that’s a whole other story, but because sometimes I just want to choose to be brain dead. Now, that’s a little immature when I begin to think about it. I don’t want to be brain dead. Not at all. But, personally, I don’t enjoy math or science courses; I am just one of those people who have more interest in analyzing how the world works socially, politically, and morally, rather than physically and empirically. I know other students who feel the same way about humanities and social science courses. People take advanced courses in fields that they won’t pursue at the university level because they’re trying to convey to colleges that they are a “renaissance (wo)man.” And so we sit there in those classes and say, “Well, this is what it is.” At least in the British system, and most European systems for that matter, they don’t pester students by forcing them to take courses they don’t want to after age 16. That is, at age 17, you begin to specialize. Listen: if it’s good enough for people going to Oxford and Cambridge, it’s good enough for me. But that problem in the educational system is a whole other level of B.S. that I don’t want to go into right now. The point is, why shouldn’t I feel like school should be over? It feels like summer outside and my courses even seem like jokes. Let’s get real, AP teachers either a) have the students watch movies, b) assign

a project that, while fun, may not help the students to learn material, c) assign a project that, while helping to the students to learn material, cannot be done to the student’s best ability because he/she is too busy enjoying his/herself before leaving home to go off to college, work, or military service. Part of the problem is that APs do not jive with our school calendar. Really, schools in New York State should start earlier so that there is less of an awkward time between APs and the end of the year. But it’s not clear whether or not that will ever change and, again, that’s a whole other level of B.S. which I don’t want to get into. Moreover, our grades are in at colleges and, basically, it’s pretty hard to land oneself on probation or, even worse, get one’s admission withdrawn based off fourth-quarter grades. (Pretty much for all you juniors out there, a slip of -1.00 in your GPA or more is going to look pretty suspicious/annoying to colleges.) If there is a point to this rant, I would say it is as follows: Teachers, understand that your students are effectively brain-fried and, for the first time in their lives, are seeing the light at the end of a very, very dark tunnel. Students, I mean you future seniors, understand that you’ve been doing this for the past four years, and all you need to do is show up, put on a fake smile, and continue to do that basic grunt work you’ve been doing all these years. Could we change it to make things better? Maybe. Does any senior really have the energy right now to voice concerns? Not really.

Defective Detective By COLIN RAYMOND

Editor’s note: The Defective Detective is a serial fictional publication. All characters, situations, and information regarding IHS are the product of the creative genius of the author for your entertainment. On Saturday I was driving leisurely downtown to windowshop when I received a phone call. It was an official from College Board, calmly informing me that Ithaca High School’s Advanced Placement exam scores had been unilaterally cancelled due to a video of several exams prominently posted on an IHS student’s Facebook page. She told me confidentially that the video may not even have been taken at IHS, but the College Board’s stringent test policies demand that a punishment be quickly doled out after such an egregious breach of security. Anything else would be widely seen as lily-livered. I immediately pulled over to the side of the road, nearly killing a bicyclist, and speed-dialed Mr. Mills. Frantically I told him of the catastrophe, going to great lengths to fully explain how damaging this episode would be to IHS’s reputation; he briefly responded that he had already heard the news. He politely requested that I visit his office so we could discuss a course of action. I inquired as to the situation involving the contract of the “other” detective, and Mr. Mills hurriedly responded that the district had firmly recommitted

itself to the principles of affirmative action - since I was in the minority as an able-bodied white male, I had been reinstated. His tone was resigned and his manner weary as I spoke privately with him. He secretly admitted that outrage would ensue in the community as soon as people knew of the cancelled scores, and that there would probably be calls for him to resign. (On the positive side, having no AP scores would mean students’ resumés would be more equal, so that overall more students’ dreams would be achieved). Mr. Mills extensively detailed for me the facts regarding the incident, which are as follows: On Saturday morning, May 15, videos of four AP exams were unexpectedly found by an IHS staff member surfing students’ Facebook pages to ensure school safety. These videos had post dates of May 5, 6, 10, and 14, and widely varied in length from 12.37 minutes to 153.09 minutes. The long video, much to officials’ embarrassment, covered nearly the whole three-hour exam. Mr. Mills had thoroughly questioned all those who proctored for those four dates, though I (needlessly, it turned out) insisted on a cross-examination. They all fervently assured me that no cell phones, walk-men, portable video-cassettes, or any such fancy electronics had found their way into the testing room, and furthermore that they had been constantly surveying the diligent students and had no reason to believe anything out of the

ordinary was occurring. On top of testimonials of good-faith procedures, a College Board enforcement officer had confidentially visited IHS on May 6 and found practices in keeping with those of College Board. The only real clue was that there were six students who were present in each testing room where the videos had been somehow made. Even with enhanced interrogation techniques, however, none admitted to any wrongdoing, and in fact each had a plausible alibi. Additionally, it was cursorily noted by a student trolling the internet that each morning a crime was committed the recorded temperature at Game Farm Rd. at 8:00 a.m. was below 50 degrees Fahrenheit, though what possible bearing this could have on the case I have not the slightest idea. Breaking news! Just as I sat here slowly sipping my coffee I received an email from the library sadly reporting the theft of video equipment on May 4. But is that a coincidence? How was it used to record the exams? How was it slipped past the unceasing gaze of the proctors? Why did no one notice until today? How were hour-long videos made, yet kept secret? Questions are constant, flashes of inspiration fleeting. As you all know, my number is always on, and my office is always open. Please don’t hesitate to contact me if you have any pertinent information. See Page 7 for solution.

ADVERTISE

with us

email ads@ihstattler.com

March Defective Detective Solution By COLIN RAYMOND

Yet another unexpected development occurred in a case that was mine (though I admit I had been stumped for several weeks), allowing a certain unnamed competitor of mine to secure the coveted county police department contract this year. I intend, however, to do such a fine job of publicizing the case I wrote of in March that the county legislature will award me back my rightful position. After all, is it not more important to communicate well with the public than to do all the work yourself? Even the FBI, in broadcasting criminals’ information on its electronic billboards, now recognizes the need to engage the public to effectively solve crimes. But I digress. Is anyone still reading? For you, treasured reader, I present the sordid details of the case that was solved only after a tip that provided the critical piece of information: that all the illnesses first occurred on St. Patrick’s Day, March 17. Suddenly the green liquid made sense—it was green milk, the kind that can be purchased only on that date and a staple in elementary school cafeterias nationwide. A large fraction of the affected students were Asian because they were lactose-intolerant, and drank the stuff, unaware that it was milk. My conclusion that the disease was contagious was completely incorrect. Nothing had been poisoned or improperly prepared, not even the bananas or Oreos. What an unfortunate conclusion – poisonings are always more exciting. Remember, kids, if you report crime data, you’ll get a chance to win an iPad Beta at drawings every third Tuesday at the fire station.

June 9, 2010

EAT THIS! The Finale: Taste of Thai Express By MATT SILICIANO and MICHAEL MIGIEL-SCHWARTZ

Seeing as weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re getting out of this hell hole, this will be the last installment of EAT THIS!. For this final meal, we decided to bring along 11 young men, for a total of 13, in line with the Last Supper tradition. In the beginning, there were three: Michael arrived along with James Steinberg â&#x20AC;&#x2122;10 and met Matt in the Dunkinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Donuts parking lot. James shared a few wise cracks about an old Jewish man and his wife, eliciting no laughter from Matt or Michael, before they all slouched down on the base of a streetlight and Matt started singing a blues song, to the accompanying snaps of Michael and James. Just as Matt got to the second verse of â&#x20AC;&#x153;My Lady Done Run Me Over Like a Trainâ&#x20AC;? and the sweet melodies of Ke$ha floated (read: roared) down Meadow St., Chris Tien â&#x20AC;&#x2122;10 and Nathan â&#x20AC;&#x153;Baby Faceâ&#x20AC;? Greene â&#x20AC;&#x2122;10 pulled into the parking lot. And then there were nine: Sammy Przdiezjfixi Przdziecki â&#x20AC;&#x2122;10, David Kaminsky â&#x20AC;&#x2122;10, Sam Knewstub â&#x20AC;&#x2122;10, and Ethan Getz â&#x20AC;&#x2122;10 arrived, and those of us present took our seats in the restaurant. At this point we were missing none other than two of the original core four: Alex â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Mail Manâ&#x20AC;? Doliner â&#x20AC;&#x2122;10 and Ben â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Kuder Kabooseâ&#x20AC;? Kuder â&#x20AC;&#x2122;10. (Our Last Supper theme had been ruined when Michael Walsh â&#x20AC;&#x2122;10 [the Lord] and his puppy, Patrick Walsh â&#x20AC;&#x2122;10 [the Betrayer], bailed at the last moment. While engaging in their pre-prandial Walsh-snack, one of the two implied that he could eat an apple faster and more effectively than the other. Soon after, the race was on. The Walsh brothers consumed a whopping total of 132 apples each, unable to conclude who was digestively superior.) On one end of the table, Ethan and Sam K. argued over whether they would rather be lost in the jungles of Panama or the tundra of Alaska. Sam, fearing the diversity of microbial life in Panamaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s water, and be-

ing highly attracted to the possibility of constructing an igloo, argued for Alaska. Ethan pointed out that Alaska has bears, the Knewstub familyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s greatest enemy; the argument ended in a stalemate, and David continued to shove the stem of a flower into Samâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s nose. Conversely, on the other end of the table James and Chris talked about recent adventures in the World of Warcraft. Matt, Michael, and Sammy, sitting at midpoint, wondered if

Nathan proclaimed, â&#x20AC;&#x153;This article should feature me!â&#x20AC;?; the other eight present members turned their heads from the babbling child to Chris, his partner in crime quietly shook his head and covered his eyes, cursing under his breath. Then, something unimaginable happened. Alex arrived, walked through the pair of doors, and sat down. Then Elaine Abdulky â&#x20AC;&#x2122;10 walked into the restaurant with Ben not too far behind. Seeing as we had

this was the peak of high school intellect. Our waitress took our order after spending a few minutes flirting with James. James, Matt, and Michael made a trilateral, communitarian decision to order family style and split up the check evenly. Our dinner contained one of each of the following dishes: Cashew Chicken, Panang Curry, Green Curry, Massaman Curry, Pad Thai, Pineapple Fried Rice, Spicy Basil Stir Fry, and Spicy Rad Nah Noodle. Note: when we actually received our food, we piled each item onto our plates willy-nilly (each of us quietly giggling at the hilarity of the phrase willy-nilly); none of us could distinguish them from one another.

not included a Mary Magdalene in our Last Supper, the group was indignant at Benâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s invitation of a nonY chromosome carrier to our holy table. Ben, in a Machiavellian coup de grĂ˘ce, quietly implied that it would be better if he and Elaine left. So, in the end, there were 10. The group sat in shocked silence, allowing Benâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dinner-based man-foul to sink in. James broke the silence with another excellent joke, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Well, we gained Malex, and his hyper-masculine chin, so now I can crack these walnuts I have here.â&#x20AC;? There were many cheers of hoorah as The Moody Mail Man settled in and began to play with a few of the partyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s napkins. Once more, our little ego-cen-

Describing IHS in Six Words By CHRISTINA SEUNG

When I surveyed around school this month, here are some of the responses I received: -Extremely poor but fun and cool. -Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s an ovenâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;hot and toasty. -The best in the whole world! -Old, rusty buildings but very diverse. -A happy place that I love! -Needs more money and AP classes. -Stressful with homework but very nice. -Students are clique-y, teachers are welcoming. -Ithaca High School is over-the-top gorges. -Loud, crowded, big, noisy, and red. -A lot of happy, diverse people. -Needs cash, but full of love. While some students complimented IHS for its diversity, others had criticisms of the recent budget cut - the most frequently used word was â&#x20AC;&#x153;poor.â&#x20AC;? Anna Fu â&#x20AC;&#x2122;13 said, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s really bad, because theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re forcing people who want to take two science AP classes to take only one!â&#x20AC;? Daniel Park â&#x20AC;&#x2122;12 commented, â&#x20AC;&#x153;One word for IHSâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;crap. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s

broke and teachers are getting cut.â&#x20AC;? In response to the lack of money, Lucy Duan â&#x20AC;&#x2122;12 wondered, â&#x20AC;&#x153;How come we have money to buy smart boards but not enough money to have summer school? We should sell our smart boards.â&#x20AC;? On the other hand, a countless number of people raved about IHSâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s great academics and diverse population. Sunita Christensen â&#x20AC;&#x2122;13 said, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Oh my gosh! I love IHS! Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the awesomest, bestest school ever!â&#x20AC;? Anying Li â&#x20AC;&#x2122;12 reported, â&#x20AC;&#x153;IHS has really good teachers and great, challenging classes that college administrators love. Lots of students from IHS go to Ivy League universities such as Cornell, Harvard, Princeton, and Yale. Our mean for AP exam scores is significantly higher than the national one.â&#x20AC;? Like many other students, Sunny Joo â&#x20AC;&#x2122;12 observed, â&#x20AC;&#x153;IHS is really diverse. You see people from so many different countries!â&#x20AC;? To further improve IHS, Lauren Hellwitz â&#x20AC;&#x2122;10 remarked, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Our school definitely has cliques because everyone knew each other from elementary school. Link Crew helps a lot with the transition for new students and freshmen, but making friends seems to be the hard part for most of them.â&#x20AC;?

trist Nathan chimed in, this time to ask â&#x20AC;&#x153;Hey guys, how far do you think I could throw this plate?â&#x20AC;? and Chris, once more, had to shake his head in shame. The food arrived, and within 10 minutes, it was effectively gone. Listen, we donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t actually know anything about food, but this place is darn scrumptious, easily making the EAT THIS! top three. Chris, master of all (Asian) food, gave it a wide smile and two anime references. Our conclusion on the culinary delights of Taste of Thai Express is this: the place serves darn good Thai food, and is very affordable for its quality. Including tip (we ended up paying $11 per person). Go there and order something adventurous, something other than Pad Thai. Go there and order anything we ordered, and weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll bet you (Nathanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s) money youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll love it. As Michael droned on about some stupid metaphorical story that Jesus may or may not have recounted at the Last Supper (having something to do with love, some vines, and three or four hungry hippos), Matt and one other party member promptly began discussing the film, The NeverEnding Story, based off of the 1979 German fantasy novel by Michael Ende. By this point, Michaelâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sheet of note paper had made its way to the other end of the party where it learned that Ethan, unfortunately, â&#x20AC;&#x153;had but meager pickings on his end of the table.â&#x20AC;? Sammy quietly occupied himself with creating a Les Paul guitar out of his fork and napkin. And so thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s high schoolâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;right? Sometimes you sit around eating Thai food, talking about (or with) Jesus, singing the blues about your lady and her similarities to a train, or maybe analyzing The NeverEnding Story while someone doodles prurient things on scraps of paper. Then you get up from the table, go to college, and bump into some new folk so you can start the whole merry-go-round again. To that, to the handsome Walsh family, and to you, dear reader, we raise our glasses and bid you farewell.

GVIEXI E TIVJIGX WYQQIV 6j\jhi ^h i]Z bdci] [dg iZZch Vi >i]VXVĂ&#x2030;h

$0..6/*5: 4$)00- 0' .64*$ "/% "354

NE^^ MRWXMXYXI V\Zh &&"&-

Â?Ă&#x2022;iĂ&#x192; -Ă&#x152;>Â&#x2DC;`>Ă&#x20AC;`Ă&#x192; Â&#x201C;ÂŤĂ&#x20AC;Â&#x153;Ă&#x203A;Â&#x2C6;Ă&#x192;>Ă&#x152;Â&#x2C6;Â&#x153;Â&#x2DC; Ă&#x2022;iĂ&#x192;Ă&#x152;Ă&#x160; Ă&#x20AC;Ă&#x152;Â&#x2C6;Ă&#x192;Ă&#x152;Ă&#x192;t

EBZ JOUFOTJWF GPS JOTUSVNFOUBMJTUT "VH o

$4." 'BDVMUZ (VFTU "SUJTUT

WXEV WIEVGL V\Zh &%"&+ 5XP EBZ QSPHSBNT "VH o "VH o

VĂ&#x152;t -Â&#x2C6;Â&#x2DC;}t

>Â&#x2DC;Vit

MFE CZ %PSFFO "MTFO )PMMZ "EBNT -J[ -JWFTBZ Â&#x153;Â&#x2DC;Ă&#x160;Ă&#x152;Â&#x2026;iĂ&#x160;Ă&#x153;iLĂ&#x160;JĂ&#x160;Ă&#x160;

VĂ&#x192;Â&#x201C;>Â&#x2021;Â&#x2C6;Ă&#x152;Â&#x2026;>V>Â°Â&#x153;Ă&#x20AC;}

June 9, 2010

June Defective Detective Solution By COLIN RAYMOND

I finally did it! I was able to walk into Mr. Mills’s office and proudly say, “Case closed.” My contract with the district is sealed, and it’s not likely to be terminated. Mystery-solving is an essential function of any respectable school district. This is how I unraveled the mystery: several days after the crime, a library staff member discovered that a video camera was missing from the top-secret storage room. Apparently no one had noticed the absence before, because the library’s electronic equipment of that sort is so infrequently used. Which is inexplicable, because the stolen camera, I deduced, must have been wireless, and thus relatively new. As any time a cord is plugged into an outlet, the Central Database records the voltage used, the duration, and the outlet location. Such an unauthorized use of electricity in York during an AP exam would have immediately aroused suspicion. I decided I would likely find the perpetrator via the camera, so I put up post-

HELP WANTED The Tattler needs

cartoonists, columnists,

ers around town asking if anyone had seen an IHS-marked camera. A few days later a woman called to say she had seen a high-schooler and several friends with a camera that had black writing that may have read “IHS.” I called my buddy who lives in the neighborhood and asked him to track down the suspects. After a manhunt too lengthy to describe for lay readers, he caught them, with intimidation provided by a water gun. “IHS” had indeed been scrawled on the side, but they swore the camera was borrowed from a friend, whose name they eventually grudgingly provided. Using my always-handy IHS Directory I determined the new suspect’s address and ambushed him there as he arrived home from school. Just one look and I knew how the camera had been hidden—he had an afro at least four inches tall! As soon as he realized I was unstoppable in my quest for truth, he revealed to me how he operated a wireless device without the school’s permission—he knew the wireless-network password. There it is, friends. That’s why they pay me. But don’t look for this column next year. In the interest of security, the district has decided that detectives should tell no tales.

photographers, and most of all,

email editor@ihstattler.com for more information

writers.

Mehak Restaurant Review By ANNELISE RAYMOND

Mehak, my next monthly restaurant review, Is an Indian restaurant that is brand new Near Sangam on Eddy Street The two restaurants now compete Thus competitiveness does ensue Erin Rieger ’12 joined my rendezvous Soon Lucy Lagoze ’12 joined us too It was a blustery day Hair blowing every which way We met outside the Collegetown venue The friendly maître d’ at the door Showed us to a table: what he was for Colors were crimson and white Lamps there were modern and bright With swirly red patterns on the décor There hung paintings with an Indian theme One mural portrayed fields, pastures, a stream Reasons for this must be that It’s India’s habitat From colonial days, it would seem Flowers in the restaurant did abound Everything was clean and neat, we found From the curtains to each chair All was arranged with care Fancy decorations were all around Service was prompt, waiters were many Of dishes we had, I’d suggest any ’Twas a rotating menu For last time at the venue There’d been different foods; Erin had had many We took some of everything at first In Indian food we were immersed But there’s American food For those in the mood Aside from the main bar, not interspersed We helped ourselves to fresh Naan bread and rice And Vegi Pakora—we restocked twice There were onions and peas The sauces were sure to please And Tandoori Chicken was worth the price One dish was particularly hot With sauce still bubbling from the cooking pot

Also in the sense of spice Erin’s valid advice Was ‘peas are spicy,’ a very wise thought While cutting chicken, a fail Erin had She sprayed Lucy and me with rice, a tad I dropped my knife on the floor But then I stole one more From a close table, so it wasn’t that bad We took our second course after a time The restaurant was full—lunch-hour prime Then an explosion took place And rice flew through space Lucy’d put her plate down hard this time I took some mac and cheese just to try it Indian food’s their forte, by a bit For those sensitive to spice You needn’t think twice The food didn’t have excess heat in it A bowl of rice pudding wrapped up our meal It gave off a nice Christmas-y feel Eggnog flavor, Erin thought Flavors of which we knew almost naught The cinnamon really had an appeal Waiters were punctual, service was great Not once late to take away our old plate Buffet refilled constantly More food set ASAP For the crowd, refills did accommodate ’Twas $10 each for the lunch buffet For dinner, it’s near twelve for an entrée Mehak’s sure to delight There’s more than thought on first sight The food’s more filling than mere sight would say We’d come early and missed the crowd there There were long lines—reader beware With a festival downtown There still was no slowdown Mehak filled up, you should be aware After feasting at Mehak’s lunch buffet Erin, Lucy, and I called it a day We’d picked a great spot, we thought Good value for what we got We reflected: ’twas a fine new buffet

The Tattler needs ads. Support us by buying one. email

ads@ihstattler.com

Senior Supplements 2010 Name: Robby Ainslie Nickname (s): Robs Secret Ambition: Marry Alex LoPinto Favorite IHS Class: Gym w/ Ms. Maddren Favorite IHS Memory: Football At IHS, I will most miss: my friends Plans for next year: Cornell! To the Class of 2011, I leave: Cheryl and Linda, the bestest lunch ladies ever! Shoutouts: To the librarians, for putting up with all of our noise Name: Ebolutalese Airewele Nickname (s): OT, Otis, general.mcotis Motto: We’re big kids, so we do big things Secret Ambition: one piece body suit --> yowza! Favorite IHS Class: ap environmental science global with Mrs. PB Favorite IHS Memory: Taryn absolutely busting her butt on the steeple chase, everything Tyrell Latimore ever said At IHS, I will most miss: Coach Hunter’s pep talk, running from Boone, Ithaca Relays! Plans for next year: Cornell 2014 To the Class of 2011, I leave: Absolutely nothing but 2010’s legacy. We’re like MC Hammer- can’t touch it. Shoutouts: Girls Track and Field & Brianna Pettaway, and Ms. Hess and Ms. Maddren of course. Name: Jenna Babbitt Nickname (s): Gran Motto: “Are you living or are you existing?” Secret Ambition: Own a business Favorite IHS Class: 12th grade English with Ms. Lord Favorite IHS Memory: “Whose BIRTHDAY?!” At IHS, I will most miss: Seeing my best friends every day, 12th grade lunch that we all had together (minus Serena), pretty much everything Plans for next year: TC3, working a lot To the Class of 2011, I leave: advice: Do NOT get behind senior year, you’ll regret it! Shoutouts: My mom, gram gram, my dogs, my favorite pen. . . And maybe Serena. . . Name: Eric Bae Nickname (s): ebay (?) Favorite IHS Class: AP Geography Favorite IHS Memory: Geopardy At IHS, I will most miss: My high school life Plans for next year: Go to college, liva a new life To the Class of 2011, I leave: (see above)

To the Class of 2011, I leave: You know what, you know where. Keep it secret. Keep it safe. Shoutouts: Less than three to you all! Raise the metaphorical roof IHS! Name: Kyle Bechert Nickname (s): Kyfly Motto: Push it to the limit Secret Ambition: to be #44 Favorite IHS Class: Government with Mr. Borthwick. AP Human Geo. 0 period English w/ Mr. Armstrong Favorite IHS Memory: Hockey/Football games Plans for next year: UCONN To the Class of 2011, I leave: We’re perfect 10 Shoutouts: To my soccer and lax girls- and my lunch table Name: Taylor Becker Nickname (s): T-$, Twiddle Secret Ambition: It’s not a secret if I write it Favorite IHS Class: English Media 2009 Favorite IHS Memory: Teaching Mr. Brown the Charleston At IHS, I will most miss: President with JT, Theo, Cherney, etc. Plans for next year: Going to IC for Athletic Training Shoutouts: Rachel, Matt, you know what? I don’t have room to write them all, love you guys! Name: Jacqueline Elizabeth Booth Nickname (s): Jackie Motto: “It’s better to light a candle than curse the dark” - K’naan Secret Ambition: To own a restaurant in the south Favorite IHS Class: Mr. Brown’s US History Class Favorite IHS Memory: Mr. Brown trying to learn the Charleston Making ice cream in chemistry Playing cards in H-Courtyard When Mr. Noyes caught Derrick sleeping in class and he had to buy donuts for everyone At IHS, I will most miss: Ms. Gluck’s Economics class Hanging out in the Quad on sunny days Plans for next year: Hitting up the city for college at the University of Toronto To the Class of 2011, I leave: Legends Shoutouts: Eternal gratitude to the Class of 2010 for kindness, friendship, and inspiration!

Name: Derrick Barrett Nickname (s): Two-Piece Motto: live your life! Favorite IHS Class: Mr. Noyes Pre-Calc Favorite IHS Memory: Football Senior year and winning our first game At IHS, I will most miss: Class color day but I’ve been missing that :( Plans for next year: TC3 for a year, then Ithaca College To the Class of 2011, I leave: Shoutouts: To my sister Felicia, do you and keep up Name: Michelle Bax Nickname (s): Shelly, Chilly, The “Ohai!” Giraffe of Over-Friendliness Motto: All penguins are black and white. Some movies are black and white. Therefore, some penguins are old movies. Secret Ambition: To say “Bless You” before someone sneezes and distract them into not sneexing Favorite IHS Class: WISE English wooooo! Favorite IHS Memory: Random dancing in the hallway (Especially the Bugaloo!) At IHS, I will most miss: My fabulous peeps: the lunch ladies, the library ladies, and all the wonderful teachers who’ve taught me. Rock on! Plans for next year: TO DA WURL

PHOTO / AMY LI

Name: Xavier Bourne Nickname (s): Brother X Motto: “Bring down that Giant” Secret Ambition: Airline Pilot Favorite IHS Class: Economics- Hopkins Favorite IHS Memory: Battleship- econ Boom! At IHS, I will most miss: Pre-Calc Noyes Plans for next year: Cornell Class of 2014 To the Class of 2011, I leave: Have fun Shoutouts: Free Form Funk Brothas! Name: Ulys Brewer Nickname (s): UT Motto: Fat chicks

Secret Ambition: Don’t have one Favorite IHS Class: Econ Favorite IHS Memory: Football season last year At IHS, I will most miss: Chicken strips To the Class of 2011, I leave: nothing Shoutouts: Scott’s car with the street glow sticker Name: Triana Brown Nickname (s): T-hood! Motto: Don’t stop get it, get in!! Favorite IHS Class: New visions ‘10 At IHS, I will most miss: Everyone Plans for next year: Franklin & Marshall College w/ Lizzy Shoutouts: To my Jennyppoo!!!!! Name: Laura Chamberlain Favorite IHS Class: Fractals and Chaos, Math Favorite IHS Memory: Fundamental Theorem of Calculus Day Plans for next year: Electrical Engineering at UB To the Class of 2011, I leave: The new, fancy, improved Kulp Name: Brittany Clark Nickname (s): Jellybean Favorite IHS Class: Choir At IHS, I will most miss: Kim Caforio Plans for next year: College TC3 To the Class of 2011, I leave: Choir, Mr. Loomis Shoutouts: You rule Mr. Loomis Name: Courtney Collinger Nickname (s): C-Love, Coat-knee, Courtknocker Motto: “I’m over it” Bitte! Secret Ambition: Punch a gypsy kid (ala Mr. Byrne) Favorite IHS Class: English Media 2009 Favorite IHS Memory: E/K saga (T$ you know what I’m talking about) At IHS, I will most miss: G-hallway. . . Just kidding :) Plans for next year: TC3; spending wayyy too much time at tacobell with Taylor and Shawn. :) To the Class of 2011, I leave: Nothin’ Shoutouts: Gunnar: Keep on chuggin’ Brandon: . . . Good luck :) Name: Jeff Cook Nickname (s): JHOOD Motto: “Its me?” “Sarah?!?” Secret Ambition: To find the clock from activities Favorite IHS Class: Pre-Calc with Noyes or Physics with Rosen Favorite IHS Memory: Jeff Dumont’s Golden 8 At IHS, I will most miss: Scott Boettger’s car Plans for next year: Monroe Community College is Rochester/Soccer To the Class of 2011, I leave: Heath Duncan’s whistle Shoutouts: Ben Kuder; “Good game” “lil” Nick Bellisario Name: Caitlyn Cowan Nickname (s): Katie Motto: “Whatever’s meant to be will work out perfectly.” Secret Ambition: To become a writer At IHS, I will most miss: Choir class Plans for next year: Staying in Ithaca and taking a year off To the Class of 2011, I leave: H-Courtyard Name: Audrey Cullen Nickname (s): Audge, Audge-Podge, “Big Gretch” Motto: Keep your memories close, for you cannot relive them Secret Ambition: pursue burger flipping @ McDonalds Favorite IHS Class: Photography Favorite IHS Memory: Singing Christmas songs in darkroom, Anthony’s birthday lap dances, falling

June 9, 2010

face first in the hallway, Kiara tackling me at Winter Formal and falling, senior night for volleyball, bus rides with the basketball team, singing in the locker room before basketball, racing Ayanda and Y-nasia with Keisha At IHS, I will most miss: Anthony’s seagull call, weather confused girls (boots + shorts), Heath’s “par ty foul” whistle Plans for next year: TC3 for Hotel/Restaurant + playing volleyball/basketball To the Class of 2011, I leave: nothing b/c we have nothing to leave. The Class of ‘09 didn’t leave us anything! Shoutouts: to the ‘09-’10 basketball team, all my friends. . . + Serena. . . Name: Hannah De Jong Motto: 3.141592653589793. . . Secret Ambition: Recite pi at the top of a mountain Favorite IHS Class: Computer science, Biology, Chemistry, Fractals and Chaos Favorite IHS Memory: The Fundamental Theorem of Calculus Plans for next year: Computational Biology at Cornell

PHOTO/KALILA BOOKER-CASSANO

Name: Jamar Dillard Nickname (s): Afro thunder, Jammer Motto: Yeah buddy! Secret Ambition: 7 figure salary Favorite IHS Class: PE with Ms. M, English with Ms. Lord, Math with Todd Noyes Favorite IHS Memory: Class color day At IHS, I will most miss: GYM. Scott’s tint job Plans for next year: College and making CA$H To the Class of 2011, I leave: The legacy of having the freshest Afro Shoutouts: Heath- Get meh with the whistle. BobGood times this year, still ballin’ Name: Jessica Dreiling Nickname (s): Billy, Simpato, Tomato Motto: Always lend a helping hand, cuz you never know when you’re gonna need one Secret Ambition: To be an author Favorite IHS Class: 2010! AP Chem with Mr. Tuori! Favorite IHS Memory: The mornings I can hang out with my friends. At IHS, I will most miss: My friends. Plans for next year: College: Houghton College. To the Class of 2011, I leave: Mr. Loomis’ sanity. Take good care of it. Shoutouts: Rock on Mr. Tuori! To all my peeps! Name: Heath Duncan Nickname (s): Cool Breeze Motto: Sarah. Your Home! Mayo! Secret Ambition: Find clock for Activities Favorite IHS Class: Lunch Favorite IHS Memory: Too many At IHS, I will most miss: The fights Plans for next year: College To the Class of 2011, I leave: My Whistle Shoutouts: Keag and Eli- “Run it” Mr. Powers Name: Mary Eloundou Nickname (s): Tyna, Flo Motto: Imagination is more important than knowledge, Common sense is not so common. Secret Ambition: To keep my secret ambition secret Favorite IHS Class: AP Stats with Mr. Kirk tied with AP French with Madame Bowman Plans for next year: Travel to Italy, Cornell University

Name: Taylor Engstrom Favorite IHS Class: Honors English 10 with Mr. Asklar Plans for next year: Cornell University to study finance & play football Name: Maddie Halpert Nicknames: Maddlepert, Mads Motto: That’s what friends are for Secret Ambition: Be on a boat with the KGBC and Morgan Freeman or become a certified ninja Favorite IHS Class: Combined, Orchestra, F&C, Programming/Comp Sci. Favorite IHS Memory: Cheesecakes, 8th per. Junior year At IHS I will most miss: The Tattler Office, The Cello Room, The Garden Behind K To the Class of 2011 I leave: A clean Tattler office, a new and improved Kulp, the joys of brainshift, and my entire collection of Mustang Convertibles Name: Benjamin Harned Nickname (s): Ben, Barned, Ben 2, Paco Motto: Who dares wins Secret Ambition: Become Hegemon of the earth by age 25, clone my brain to create an AI Favorite IHS Class: Combined with PB/Bach Favorite IHS Memory: Competing in Code Red Robotics competitions At IHS, I will most miss: My friends, my teachers, the librarians and the cafeteria staff! Plans for next year: Study International Relations at SUNY Geneso To the Class of 2011, I leave: Some toxic assets, whatever is at the bottom of my locker, & H-Courtyard Shoutouts: “What else do we burn?” “More witches!” “Rejection papers!” Name: Nathan Hilgartner Nickname (s): Big Boss, Ody$$eu$ Motto: What happens in the basement stays in the basement Secret Ambition: Some how, some day, to marry Ms. Hess Favorite IHS Class: AP Lang with Mr. Anderson Favorite IHS Memory: Watching Grizzly Man in Mr. Nelson’s APES class; “chaos, hostility and murder;” playing guitars really badly in Kulp with Pletter; Beauty and the Beast and Into the Woods At IHS, I will most miss: Major Major; arguing politics with Mr. Powers Plans for next year: Harvard To the Class of 2011, I leave: Take Fractals and Chaos and get your mind blown Shoutouts: Kevin “Megalon” Hilgartner, my archnemesis; Lorenzo. . . McClellan, my most trusted advisor; Gabe, Jake and Sam, kickin’ it since 1st grade; all the members of all the casts of all the shows I’ve been in during high school Name: Kim Howe Motto: Everything’s better when you have a geek squad Secret Ambition: Someday brass players will rule the world. The end. Favorite IHS Class: Band. +-=iii+<() Favorite IHS Memory: Pep Band. Best stuff. EVER. At IHS, I will most miss: Mr. Drix’s jokes, Ms. Craig’s antics, and Mr. Myer’s singing Plans for next year: Fredonia School of Music To the Class of 2011, I leave: Next year have sugar on hand at all times Shoutouts: John- I love you! Keaton- Need any sun block? Ms. Zawel- What am I going to do without you next year?!? Name: Chris Hudson Nickname (s): Huddy, Hoodie Motto: “Started with nothing. . . Still have most of it left” Secret Ambition: US History with Mrs. Kruger 11th grade Favorite IHS Memory: Jewle Fisher, ‘nuff said At IHS, I will most miss: school food Plans for next year: San Diego State University To the Class of 2011, I leave: nothing Shoutouts: Cheryl, Linda, and the rest of the lunch ladies Name: Valerie Kilmer Nickname (s): Val/Kiki Motto: Never eat yellow snow Secret Ambition: To write a Western romance novel about an insomniac cowboy called “Sleepless in a

Saddle” Favorite IHS Class: Spanish III Favorite IHS Memory: “What are we going to do with our lives?” At IHS, I will most miss: Ms. Craig’s humor Plans for next year: Livin’ the dream. To the Class of 2011, I leave: Peace, love, and Senioritis Shoutouts: Stay human Name: Mitch Kippola Nickname (s): Kip Motto: Come on, we’re in a recession Secret Ambition: To make more money than Bernie Madoff Favorite IHS Class: Econ with Mr. Lockett Favorite IHS Memory: Watching the hockey team win States in ‘07 At IHS, I will most miss: The party bus Plans for next year: Alfred State To the Class of 2011, I leave: potential Shoutouts: Not at the table, Lockett Name: Phoebe Koenig Nickname (s): Phoebster Motto: There’s no rush to a red light. Secret Ambition: To be the best female white Tupac impersonator within a 200 mile radius Favorite IHS Class: English Media with Mr. Byrne Plans for next year: To get knocked up by Peter Thompson and have a 3 headed baby To the Class of 2011, I leave: My baby Shoutouts: Cindy Margolis and Emilee Name: Ambria Latham Nickname (s): Amb Motto: “Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” Favorite IHS Class: Pre-Calc with Mr. Noyes At IHS, I will most miss: All of my favorite teachers Plans for next year: Elmira College Class of 2014 To the Class of 2011, I leave: Have fun, don’t regret anything Name: Christian Leonard Nickname (s): Jolley Green Giant Motto: You’re welcome Secret Ambition: To spread world confusion >A*> current Favorite IHS Class: philosophy Favorite IHS Memory: That time in which I was debatably in school, alive, learning, half asleep, possessed, insane, or existant At IHS, I will most miss: The gloomy suicidal atmosphere. . . Oh yeah, they have that in college too. Plans for next year: To the Class of 2011, I leave: My soul, it’s useless in college anyways. That is if I haven’t lost it yet. Shoutouts: By changing one’s perception of the world, one changes the world’s percetion of one’s self. Name: Dawei Lin Nickname (s): Dawezy Motto: Yo chillll! Secret Ambition: Duno Favorite IHS Class: Pre-Calc Favorite IHS Memory: Color day At IHS, I will most miss: food fight Plans for next year: college To the Class of 2011, I leave: nothing Name: Alex LoPinto Nickname (s): AL* Motto: “Never eat paint” Secret Ambition: To be Jane Fonda and wear long johns in public. Favorite IHS Class: Whenever Mr. Bowen subs is my favorite IHS Class. He’s such a softy. Favorite IHS Memory: Watching the librarians film the end of the year “unplanned” food fights. At IHS, I will most miss: Wegman’s trips with Cameron and BWU. Plans for next year: HOFSTRA PRIDE! To the Class of 2011, I leave: Some obscene grafitti in the girls bathroom. Just Kiddin. Shoutouts: To my future husband, you better be hawt. Word. Name: Kiara Love Nickname (s): Kiki, Gran, Ki Motto: “I ask not for a lighter load, but for broader shoulders” Secret Ambition: Open a coffee shop in downtown Ithaca :)

June 9, 2010

Favorite IHS Class: Photography 12th grade with Judy Favorite IHS Memory: FAILING COMPLETELY at singing the National Anthem at a home volleyball game. And Anthony Wade giving lap dances to birthday girls. “WHOSE BIRTHDAY?!” Anthony’s seagull call At IHS, I will most miss: Judy Cogan and her photo classes. Anyone who had her is a lucky individual :) Plans for next year: TC3, work, travel as much as possible To the Class of 2011, I leave: No money, because we took it all! 2010! Shoutouts: M@ gurl sh@niiqu@ and. . . Serena. . . Name: Sarena Lynch Nickname (s): Siggs, Siggbear Secret Ambition: Be a go-go dancer Favorite IHS Class: Hopkins/Lockett Economics Favorite IHS Memory: Pep rallies At IHS, I will most miss: My friends Plans for next year: University of Virginia To the Class of 2011, I leave: Advice: Apply to a rolling college early Shoutouts: Audrey and Brittany- stay outta trouble, Annelise- you ma girl, stay fly

my car.

Plans for next year: College To the Class of 2011, I leave: Stay focused! Have fun! Shoutouts: Kim, Drea, Regine, Nana, Nasia!

Name: Matt Millard Nickname (s): None Motto: Be yourself Favorite IHS Class: 12th grade pre calc Plans for next year: College Senior Supplements 2010 Name: Marcus Moss Nickname (s): Swag/Snus Motto: Go hard or go home, It’s a recession, Fe Fe’s Magic Mix Secret Ambition: To be world famous Favorite IHS Class: First period first semester econ/ Junior yr. chem class Favorite IHS Memory: Having a great senior football season, Taylor Engstrom finally has his wish come true. . . And it ain’t football (K.B.) At IHS, I will most miss: Parking tickets, the library, my crew Plans for next year: Playing football at Alfred State To the Class of 2011, I leave: A legacy that you can never compete with Shoutouts: Mr. Redmond, Norm, Cheryl, my family, my dogs Tyson and Coper “We made it”

Name: Sarah Lynott Favorite IHS Class: Chemistry with Mr. Tuori Favorite IHS Memory: F.T.C. Day At IHS, I will most miss: Gimme runs & Tiddlywinks Plans for next year: Northwestern University Name: Mikey Manuel Nickname (s): Michelle Motto: “Yo wassup Ma” Favorite IHS Class: Econ w. Lockett Favorite IHS Memory: Food fight sophomore year At IHS, I will most miss: The lunch ladies Plans for next year: Play a little lax at Oneonta Name: Ramish McBride Motto: “The next step is the best step” and “If success was guaranteed and failure was not an option, what would you desire to do?” Plans for next year: Attend Tompkins County Community College to study psychology To the Class of 2011, I leave: This advice “There’s a time to play and a time to work.” Shoutouts: To everybody- Good Luck + Enjoy. See you on the other side! Name: Kelsey McCall Nickname (s): Chels Motto: “Have Fun” Yay! Secret Ambition: Be the best! Favorite IHS Class: 2010!! :) Favorite IHS Memory: The Winter Formal, “best night of my life” At IHS, I will most miss: My teachers and my friends Plans for next year: Go to TC3 To the Class of 2011, I leave: A piece of advice: Be positive, don’t give up, and just have fun! :) Shoutouts: I give a shoutout to my sister Katy McCall “I love ya sis!” “Keep looking cool” Name: Lorenzo McClellan Nickname (s): LO, Renz, Zo, Woppard Motto: “Today is my last year of high school” - overheard in J-Hallway Secret Ambition: To wed Emma Woodhouse Favorite IHS Class: History with Mrs. PB/AP Lang with Mr. Anderson Favorite IHS Memory: Constitutionals between APES periods with N. Hilgartner At IHS, I will most miss: The way the light streams through the K Bathroom windows. Classes with Misters Jordan, Nelson, Anderson, Myers and Mrs. PB Plans for next year: Princeton University To the Class of 2011, I leave: Best wishes in the face of cuts and a chest of ingots, buried somewhere on campus. Name: Caleigh McCutcheon Motto: Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted- John Lennon Favorite IHS Class: How Foods Changed History Favorite IHS Memory: Class Color Day! (Even though we didn’t really have one this year) At IHS, I will most miss: The giant cookies Plans for next year: Stonehill College To the Class of 2011, I leave: Only one more year! Shoutouts: Colleen- I love you, but plz don’t destroy

PHOTO/AMY LI

Name: Alex Mwaka Nickname (s): Mwaka Motto: Listening gets you places. Favorite IHS Class: AP Chem. Favorite IHS Memory: None stand out, but that’s obviously b/c there are too many to list. At IHS, I will most miss: The people I’ve come to know during my pre-college academic career. Plans for next year: College. To the Class of 2011, I leave: Nothing. Shoutouts: I don’t do shoutouts. Name: Rebecca Myers Nickname (s): Becca Motto: You’re only as tall as you feel Secret Ambition: To move to Germany Favorite IHS Class: US History with Mr. Brown Plans for next year: Rutgers University To the Class of 2011, I leave: “The Common App is now your best friend.” Name: Mikhail Nikulin Nickname (s): Mishka, Kirby Motto: Yea buddy, Rolling like a big shot. Greaaaaat. Secret Ambition: Food fight Favorite IHS Class: Pre-Calc with Noyes, Econ with Lockett, Physics with Rosen Favorite IHS Memory: Scott’s pranks, Food fight 08, Tree vandalism At IHS, I will most miss: Powers’ speeches at lunch Plans for next year: MCC To the Class of 2011, I leave: Some love Shoutouts: l8r IHS Name: Lizzy Noonan-Pomada Favorite IHS Class: APES w. Mrs. Bronson Favorite IHS Memory: The Boonemobile At IHS, I will most miss: My friends Plans for next year: Franklin & Marshall College Name: Ayanda Ntombela Nickname (s): Ya-Ya Motto: “Don’t sweat the small stuff ” Favorite IHS Class: Pre-calc- Mr. Noyes Favorite IHS Memory: Derrick’s “Richness & Evenness” speech At IHS, I will most miss: Racing Audrey Cullen Varsity Girls’ Basketball

Name: Angela Ochoa Favorite IHS Class: AP French Favorite IHS Memory: Food at International Club At IHS, I will most miss: Crowded hallways :) Plans for next year: College (UVM) Name: Regina Penepent Nickname (s): Gina Favorite IHS Class: Health Class 10th grade (Peta!) Favorite IHS Memory: Great football season this year! At IHS, I will most miss: The lunch ladies <3 Plans for next year: Attend St. Bonaventure University and cheer for the basketball teams Shoutouts: Anthony Wade, The Health Class crew, my sister, and the Lunch Ladies Name: Kaitlin Perez Nickname (s): Kait, Twitch, Yoteko, Rabbit Girl, Pony Perez, Perezident Motto: the more you know, the more you can laugh at Secret Ambition: To rule the world, obviously Favorite IHS Class: Zoology Favorite IHS Memory: Winning student of the quarter At IHS, I will most miss: The library. The staff work hard to maintain it. They are also so polite and helpful. Thank you for ordering the books we really wanted. Plans for next year: Study at Binghamton University To the Class of 2011, I leave: The tattered remains of the Senior Budget Shoutouts: I love you my faithful friends!!! Name: Maria Pia Nickname (s): Pia Motto: “just. . . let it be” Secret Ambition: Work for human rights Favorite IHS Class: French and American History Favorite IHS Memory: My afternoons laughing in International Club At IHS, I will most miss: Some interesting people and teachers Plans for next year: Study in my home country: Argentina To the Class of 2011, I leave: Enjoy a lot with your friends Shoutouts: Thank you Ithaca for being my home this year Name: Benika Pinch Nickname (s): Benni Favorite IHS Class: Chemistry with Mr. Tuori Favorite IHS Memory: F.T.C. Day At IHS, I will most miss: Walks to Gimme/farmer’s market. And Tiddlywinks! Plans for next year: University of Pennsylvania Name: Tasha Roberts Nickname (s): Tushy Motto: EHP for life Secret Ambition: To be half as cool as Jeff Cook Favorite IHS Class: AP Human Geography, all of Mr. Borthwick’s classes Favorite IHS Memory: Hockey games, senior events At IHS, I will most miss: my friends Plans for next year: going to college somewhere tbd To the Class of 2011, I leave: good luck trying to top our perfect 10 :) Shoutouts: To the soccer and lax girls: do it big next year. Name: Michael Robinson Nickname (s): Otto Motto: Don’t stop Believin! Secret Ambition: To be great at golf Favorite IHS Class: 11th grade art Favorite IHS Memory: Winning the homecoming football game. Listening to Chicken Frie with Robbie Ainslie At IHS, I will most miss: My football team, all my friends Plans for next year: TC3 then transfer to Buffalo State To the Class of 2011, I leave: Not a damn thing Shoutouts: Mr. Powers, Reggie Feaster, Get it Done next year in Football Name: Maeve Russell Secret Ambition: Working at a non-profit or NGO

June 9, 2010

Favorite IHS Class: AP Human Geo (w/ Mr. Powers last year- the man) Favorite IHS Memory: Leaving At IHS, I will most miss: My friends! Plans for next year: WESLEYAN UNIVERSITY!! To the Class of 2011, I leave: “Guys- survive the 1st semester and it’s all good- high school’s overrated anyway” Shoutouts: Mrs. P-B- get better real soon! No teacher could ever match your brilliance. When I’m bored w/ college, I’ll just come back to be your #1 groupie! Name: Caitlin Savino Nickname (s): Cait, Pickle, Badger Motto: Never drink soda updside down Secret Ambition: Drop a water balloon filled with mis Shoutouts: Bring the metaphorical house down IHS! Name: Nikko Schaff Nickname (s): Sunlight Motto: Anybody need equity management? Secret Ambition: Make tons of money in the stock market and use it to start a multitude of large successful businesses Favorite IHS Class: Philosophy Favorite IHS Memory: English Media Class of ‘09 At IHS, I will most miss: Watching the Auditorium being slowly rebuilt Plans for next year: Computer Science Major at RIT, managing a hedge fund To the Class of 2011, I leave: An apology of having to continue public school in such a bad period of economic history Name: Kasia Sendek Nickname (s): Kash, Sa, Kiwi Motto: Love, love, love, all the time, every day! Secret Ambition: To be married on Mt. Kilimanjaro, with 4 foreign boys signing to us during the ceremony. Also, to save the world, and to sing in Times Square Favorite IHS Class: honors and AP Chemistry Favorite IHS Memory: Every story. . . At IHS, I will most miss: The people. The beautiful, crazy, smart, slightly inappropriate, life-changing people I call my friends Plans for next year: Go to Stonybrook so that I can save some money for med school! To the Class of 2011, I leave: The lovely new and improved Kulp. . . If you’ll be able to make use of it with the budget cuts Shoutouts: To the theatre kids; fight hard guys, and everything will be so good!

in International Club At IHS, I will most miss: my friends Plans for next year: Going to college To the Class of 2011, I leave: H-Courtyard, & the Cafeteria Shoutouts: Thanks to everyone who supported me throughout my four years of high school Name: Andrew Sternglass Motto: If at first you fail call in air support Secret Ambition: Professional PC Gamer Favorite IHS Class: AP Computer Science IED At IHS, I will most miss: Code Red Robotics Club Class Color Day Plans for next year: Attending the Rochester Institute of Technology for Computer Engineering Technology Shoutouts: @simon bohn: keep pwhing, and BC2 > TF2 Name: Lily Tagg Nickname (s): Lils Motto: Sometimes you have to scrap it and start again Secret Ambition: become the next Lady GaGa Favorite IHS Class: Foods that changed history, Ceramics Favorite IHS Memory: Cheese field trip with PB and the Foods Crew At IHS, I will most miss: Mr. Anderson and his mug Plans for next year: NYU Silver School of Social Work!!! To the Class of 2011, I leave: Jocelyn, her laughter, and my art cupboard Shoutouts: My hubby Robs, G. Wang and my Beyonce, Jocey Name: Chancery Talcott Nickname (s): Chance, Chanchan, Evato, The OhNoes, Hippo Motto: In the words of Little Kuriboh: “Never leave your beaver exposed” Secret Ambition: It wouldn’t be a secret if I told you! Ok, I’ll tell you. . . for $20. . . Favorite IHS Class: Chem with Mr. Lesser was the greatest! I will forever be sad that I can’t make anymore liquid nitrogen ice cream! Favorite IHS Memory: Chillin under the staircase next to H-Courtyard with my creepy friends! <3 At IHS, I will most miss: Being with all of my friends together in one school. Plans for next year: Rock TC3, Woot!! To the Class of 2011, I leave: The food.. . Shoutouts: I less than three you Mrs. Fast! I’ll miss you! Name: Hannah Tashman Nickname (s): Dimbo (thank you Sarah Lynott) Favorite IHS Class: AP Chemistry with Mr. Tuori Favorite IHS Memory: Watching The Waterboy in Chemistry and seeing Mr. T’s face At IHS, I will most miss: Gimme runs and Tiddlywinks Plans for next year: SUNY Geneseo Shoutouts: Enjoy high school Katie!!

PHOTO/JI-YOUNG WON

Name: Matt Siliciano Nickname (s): Matty, Mattycakes, (Mr.) Silly Motto: They may kill you, but the legalities of eating you are quite dicier Secret Ambition: To marry Beyonce Favorite IHS Class: The ones with PB, Cragi, Anderson, Tuori, and Jordan Favorite IHS Memory: The Food Review, the Foods Crew At IHS, I will most miss: The flourescent lights and the teenage angst. Plans for next year: Deep Springs College ‘10 To the Class of 2011, I leave: The cruelty of the college application process and the sweet sweet release of senioritis Shoutouts: The next Lady GaGa, Regents Econ, Waffle Frolic, Princess MiMi Name: Maria-Gratias Sinon Nickname (s): Keimi Motto: Work hard; play hard Secret Ambition: being a pop & R ‘n’ B star Favorite IHS Class: Afro-American History through film Favorite IHS Memory: Having a blast with my friends

Name: Justin Tate Nickname (s): Link, Green Guy, Tate, Tatju Gib, Drifting Shrubbery, Peaton, Green-beard Motto: When in doubt, girlfriend knows best That tree is NOT following you. . . Secret Ambition: Build a light saber Favorite IHS Class: Lunch, Chem with Lesser, DDP, CIM Favorite IHS Memory: Robotics build season and competitions At IHS, I will most miss: My friends Plans for next year: Digital Arts and Sciences To the Class of 2011, I leave: Awesome Robotics Team Shoutouts: Hi to the people I know that want to say “Hi” back Name: Anthony Wade Nickname (s): Ant, Kaotic Pr1nc3, K-OS Motto: Can’t stop, won’t stop. . . Secret Ambition: Exotic dancer at Kumas. . . Just Playing. Favorite IHS Class: Mr. Asklar’s class Favorite IHS Memory: Breakdancing in the Gym Area. .. At IHS, I will most miss: Class color day, food fights Plans for next year: SUNY Purchase for graphic design To the Class of 2011, I leave: I leave my brother Kelvin Kim. . . Enjoy Shoutouts: To GCF, NewKidz, Dom’s

Name: Rebecca Waldrop Nickname (s): Bedda Secret Ambition: To work with Zahi Hawass Favorite IHS Class: Combined/Foods that Changed History Favorite IHS Memory: Eighth period free Junior year “What are we gonna do with our lives?” At IHS, I will most miss: Ben and Jenna, my muskateers Plans for next year: William Smith Class of 2014 To the Class of 2011, I leave: The new and improved Kulp Shoutouts: Good Luck next year, Everyone!

PHOTO/AMY LI

Name: Alex Walters Secret Ambition: If I told you it wouldn’t be secret... Favorite IHS Class: US History- Kruger Favorite IHS Memory: Going to Ziffy’s all Jr. year At IHS, I will most miss: Class color day Plans for next year: RIT Class of 2014 To the Class of 2011, I leave: Fight for Class Color Day, but don’t mess it up Shoutouts: Mr. Byrne- you’re the man, keep doing what you’re doing Name: John Ward Nickname (s): JWard Secret Ambition: No secrets Favorite IHS Class: AP Bio Favorite IHS Memory: Everything that isn’t wrestling season At IHS, I will most miss: Mint mondays Plans for next year: IC Cycle To the Class of 2011, I leave: The Cycle Name: Peter Westin Nickname (s): Peter Emmanuel, Upbeat Hit Secret Ambition: Mrs. Swartz is special to me and is my hero. Favorite IHS Class: Music Theory Favorite IHS Memory: Hanging out with Ms. Metzler on Field Day. Talking with Mrs. Swartz as well as joking. At IHS, I will most miss: Seeing Mrs. Swartz, my special friend. Also, seeing the new Kulp Building. Plans for next year: Working seasonally, moving in with college girls downstate. Also seeing Mrs. Swartz somewhere else. To the Class of 2011, I leave: A lowered budget for certain classes. Shoutouts: Thanks for my education, everyone. All 14 years have made me motivated in my work. Name: Cameron Younger Nickname (s): Cami, Killa Cam Motto: “I have a dream that black people, white people, and even Chinese people can gamble together without getting different colored chips.” Secret Ambition: You already know what it is. Favorite IHS Class: French w/ Mr. Holl Favorite IHS Memory: Even though he’s already moved on, Ken Clarke, you were my big brother and helped me make it through this. And my favorite memory is probably every moment spent with Ms. Maddren and Ms. Hess At IHS, I will most miss: Wegmans with Bobby Ww and A-Lo. And of course the girl who means the world to me! Plans for next year: Cornell, I don’t need to say anything else. To the Class of 2011, I leave: To Dana + Reggie, I leave IHS for you to completely own. And to Eisah, carry your class to greatness. Shoutouts: Wayne (my partner in trying to be successful), Tito Jackson, Master P (King Philip), Engstrom, and my Asian Persuasion

Under the Radar: Music You Most Likely Didn’t Hear From 2009 By KYLE ROTHMAN

The year 2009 definitely brought a great decade to its end with some great pieces of music, but from what I have experienced, the best music to be heard is that which is so hard to find. Musicians that work outside major labels and for themselves work by no quota other than their own, and only survive through support. Bands that start up on their own are playing the music they feel passionate about and feel proud of, and release work or tour to gain a fan base and play their music. Underground music is forever growing, and thanks to the internet, it is so much easier to listen to bands that you find unbelievably unique, even though they may never tour outside their state. I’ve compiled a list of three 2009 albums from bands that are growing in popularity in underground communities, and that deserve great notice. 1. Chin Up, Meriwether! – Fruition From Olympia, WA comes one of the most defiant DIY outfits in years. This band consists of all gay members playing intense and passionate hardcore punk that breaks noses, jaws, barriers, and closets like it’s everybody’s business. I can easily say I haven’t heard a band that embraced anti-homophobic attitudes with such experience, wit, and soulful lyricism. With only three members (two guys, one girl), Chin Up, Meriwether! is creating hard-edged poetry that is not to be missed. Their band name originates from the belief that Meriwether Lewis (of the American adventuring duo Lewis and Clark), had fallen for Clark and had been rejected. Their name encourages Meriwether and homosexuals everywhere to be out-of-the-closet and to be happy with themselves. Their first release, Fruition, is a landmark debut. Tracks like “Howling Underwater” combine fastpaced hardcore punk tempos and their angry attitudes towards dishonesty. Others like “We Do What We Want” and “Too Soiled to be Uprooted” reveal even more complex musical structures that range

from beautiful simplicity to raging experimentation. The single most incendiary track would have to be “Wally’s Hardcore”, a cynical tribute to the tough-guys that would go to underground shows. “Those kids, self-entitled to crime/because they subvert the masculine paradigm/they broke your face, they broke your jaw/ but clearly their plan was flawed.” The opening chords and lyrics to this track will forever embed my teenaged membrane. Chin Up, Meriwether’s Fruition is the album of 2009 and a necessity for those who love new and engaging music. I can’t wait to see what this band comes out with next. 2. O Pioneers!!! – Neon Creeps Dubbed after the famous Walt Whitman poem of the same name, O Pioneers!!! from Houston, TX is not that new a band. However, after releasing their second full-length LP, Neon Creeps, in February 2009, they are already becoming indie-punk stars of the underground. The unique power and sound embodied in this record literally topples over your sense of genrelabeling, and leaves instead an intense, expressive, easily relatable record. This release was the band’s first with a bass player, and the new depth brought to their sound has not gone unnoticed. O Pioneers!!!’ style resembles that of a dramatic punk going through some heavy changes. Each song’s lyrics jump out at you with heavy howls and shouts, and describe nostalgia, pressure, tension, and frustration, throughout all of their pieces. Songs like “Chris Ryan Added Me On Facebook” details not wanting to become Facebook friends with acquaintances from High School. Neon Creeps’ opening track, “Saved By The Bell Was A Super Good Show” describes critical teenaged drama environments. “Why do I care, what you are becoming, its not like I know that you’re better than this. You’re just becoming part of your surrounding, becoming what I expected. All of this Drama, you know this is frustrating, all of this drama, you

know that it’s suffocating.” O Pioneers!!!’s music exemplifies the total honesty of their lyrics, without distortion, without special effects, only loud, brutal reality. These fine musicians have truly captured a distinctive sound, and named their dastardly concoction Neon Creeps. 3. Andrew Jackson Jihad – Can’t Maintain For those in the mood for music that aims to disconnect you with everything you’ve known and loved, check out Andrew Jackson Jihad. This melancholy militia from Phoenix, Arizona has been around since 2005, and through their folk-punk, Woody-Guthrie-obsessed music, they attempt to criticize, corrupt, and crush the human spirit. Now, don’t let this attitude dismiss you, dear readers; their lyrics, while dark and intense, are absolutely beautiful. Through their crazy depictions of tortured souls and terrible habits, they claim society to be indecent and hopelessly incurable. Prior to Can’t Maintain, the band was playing mostly all acoustic songs with guitar, tub-bass, and often loads of other folk instruments. Their latest work however, opens with the pure electric punk of “Heartilation”, a track about tearing out your heart and giving it away to someone more deserving. Every track is unique and a big musical step for the band. Songs like “Love In The Time Of Human Papilloma Virus” have a full string section, while others like “You Don’t Deserve Yourself ” have a full horn section, both of which bring a bright and beautiful sound to accompany lyrics dark and depressing. “We Didn’t Come Here to Rock” is another one of their few electric pieces, and criticizes those that are overtly critical of musicians, and can’t look beyond their pretentious opinions and make the music they want to hear. Of course, half of the song is distorted noise that exemplifies artistic right. For artists that harshly analyze and criticize others, including themselves, Andrew Jackson Jihad is a conglomerate of different musicians that are forever changing. For music that is miraculously melodic and melancholy, check out AJJ’s Can’t Maintain.

Kick Ass Kicks Some Serious Ass By ANNIE HENDERSON

Matthew Vaughn has done it again. The same man who sent Stardust twinkling onto the big screen has successfully pulled Kick Ass off of its waxy, comic book pages to allow us to follow underdog characters while they weave their way through high school and big city crime. Aaron Johnson and Dave Lizewski, a high school nobody who spends his life taking what is given to him, fantasizing about his English teacher and hanging around the comic-book store with his friends, is played by the hilarious Even Peters and Clark Duke (who recently appeared in Hot Tub Time Machine). After several twists of fate, Dave decides to don the wetsuit costume of his crime fighting alter ego, Kick Ass. In his early days, he spent more time finding lost pets than fighting bad guys. It is only after a video of Kick Ass defending a man against three attackers goes viral that he is shot into superhero stardom, and his new status implicates him in an ex-cop’s vendetta against a crack dealing crime boss that spins wildly out of control. Watching Kick Ass feels like reading a comic book. The characters jump from one frame to the next in classic, cliché shots of people flinging themselves across rooftops outlined by cityscape horizons. The dramatic camera angles, punchy dialogue and a soundtrack of remixed pumping songs (such as “Bad Reputation”) get your adrenaline running. All of these elements can be seen in the trailer, which does not by any means do the movie justice. None of Kick Ass’s heavy under-

tones are felt in the 30-second clip. The tragic subplot revolving around Big Daddy (Nicholas Cage) and his daughter, Mindy (AKA: Hit Girl), as they seek vengeance on the crime boss, D’Amico, is completely ignored in the preview, but stand out in this otherwise comedic story. Ironically, the movie’s R rating isn’t just earned by the mobsters, but also by the cast’s youngest member, Hit Girl. The carefully choreographed, cut throat fight scenes showcase the 12-year-old clad in a purple wig and prep school skirt. Her knack for handling butterfly blades, evading bazooka fire and delivering vulgar (and hilarious) one-liners earns her the rank of Kick Ass’s most badass character. Nicolas Cage’s portrayal of Big Daddy was surprisingly well done. He taps into the character’s twisted sense of justice with unexpected conviction. Christopher Mintz-Plasse (the infamous McLovin from Superbad) amps up his customary sniveling to become D’Amico’s son, Red Mist. Besides bringing in the laughs, he drives the movie’s sweetest ride – the fire spurting Mist Mobile. Kick Ass draws on all the characteristic superhero thrills to rev up its audiences. Nonetheless, it’s exploration of the idea that we become more than ourselves by donning a mask is refreshing. Laughing at Dave’s experience reassures the audience that our attempts to help humanity are noble, however misguided or insignificant they seem. This concoction of Snatch, Superbad, Quentin Tarantino style violence and spandex makes for a completely kick ass movie.

June 9, 2010

By JIMMY EDWARDS

Why Vinyl?

Today, a teenager could go to the store, dish out a few hundred dollars, and return home with an iPod allowing him to hold 20,000 songs all in the palm of his hand. He could then use quite basic computer skills to fill that iPod to its capacity with music that he likes, completely free of charge. Although it’s entirely illegal (an issue which I will not delve into) millions of people do it daily. The idea of paying $15 for a piece of plastic, with some fancy graphics on one side seems illogical to many people when any song they could ever desire is only a few clicks and keystrokes away. The reason I point this out is to contrast it with the fact that I, along with a growing number of other people, can willingly and easily walk into a record store and spend hours searching through stacks of dusty and moldy LPs, and without even trying, walk out with a bag full of records and $50 fewer than I left home with. I’ll admit, this seems illogical based on my previous statements about useless plastic. Why spend money on records? I should start out with an explanation about how CD players work. They shoot out a laser beam at the surface of the CD and then relay the keyword digital signal back to the electronics, which in turn send more electrical signals to speakers, causing them to vibrate, which causes air to move. This movement is then picked up by our eardrums. Records produce sound with the same basic principle, but instead of the shiny surface on the back of a CD, records have grooves. Instead of shooting a laser beam, record players use a needle that rides along the surface of the record in these grooves. The needle rides along the record from the outside edge in, and transmits what sound the grooves make back to an amplifier. Speakers are then connected to the amplifier and from that point on the process is identical to that of a CD. After this crash course in sound production, you’re probably still slightly confused. There is one important idea to keep in mind: CDs are digital, while records are analog. In other words, a CD is like an electronic keyboard and a record is like a real piano. “But, Jimmy,” one might ask, “what difference does this make?” That key distinction between records and CDs is why so many record enthusiasts continue to spend

what little money they have on the devices, myself included. One might think we live in a “digital world,” but in reality we don’t. Our eardrums are analog devices, the way we speak is analog, and sound waves - no matter what produced them - are analog. So why on earth would listening to music in a digital format make any sense? It simply doesn’t. Upon digitizing sound (what you do when you import a CD into iTunes to listen to on an iPod), you compress it. By “compress,” I mean that iTunes essentially takes each song, cuts out what we supposedly don’t need to listen from it, and converts it to, for example, an MP3 file. This way we can still retain all we need of the song to hear it wand be able to fit more than 10 songs on our iPods. The problem is that, by its very nature, compressing a song and transforming it into a digital file makes the song sound empty. It’s as if you had a drawing that was too big for it’s frame, and proceeded to cut off outside edges of the drawing in order to make it fit. Sure, you still retain the majority of the drawing. Plus, most people won’t even notice the edges are gone - but the picture is still lacking those pieces that were cut off. CDs are like the drawing after the edges have been cut off, and a record is the whole picture. It’s hard to describe, but a record sounds different from a CD or an iPod. Records have a warmer, richer, and, in my opinion, better sound. In my mind, the difference is similar to the difference between music heard from a band right in front of me as opposed to a band playing in a room down the hall. What I find attractive about records it that they are tangible objects. They are much more personal than a downloaded file. Most of the records I buy are 30 to 40 years old, and have probably been owned by many different people before me. Ask anyone who has bought a record - it’s a very personal experience. I’m not just buying some piece of plastic, or downloading some digital file I can’t even see. I’m buying something physical. In a way, the size of a record is what makes it worth the money - it can’t be picked up with just one hand. Any slight touch to the grooves could scratch them, because they are very delicate objects that, when handled with proper care, will indefinitely produce good-quality music. Everyone should take the time to go down to a record store and listen to an LP. Records will open up a whole new dimension of music, and you’ll understand what it’s like to actually be able to listen to music the way it was meant to be heard.

ADVERTISE

with us

email ads@ihstattler.com

Baseball Previews and Predictions By GEOFF PRESTON

Spring: the season of life, rebirth, things becoming new again … wait, did you think I was talking about all the flowers and stuff? Sorry, my attention is entirely focused on a different kind of beauty: baseball diamonds. That’s right, ladies and gentlemen, it’s time for opening day! Nothing excites me more than the crisp voice of Jon Miller welcoming an entire nation to Sunday Night Baseball on ESPN, or the roar of crowds across the country who believe that no matter what happened last season, this is the year. Much of that attitude is overzealous energy that will quickly pan out into an order we are all accustomed to. The theme of the past decade in baseball was parity. No team won back to back titles and only two teams—the Red Sox and Yankees—won two championships in the whole decade. This is the same sport that has seen by far the most dynasties in its history, and is so lenient towards big-market clubs that all this parity came as a surprise. But of course, with a new decade comes new trends. Parity is not the name of the game this year, as I expect very little in the way of change and surprise. Of the eight playoff teams last year, I have six repeating, and the other two are arbitrary.

PHOTO/PROVIDED

American League (AL) East: Yankees I am a heavy subscriber to the idea that “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it,” and I think the Yankees tried to fix a team that wasn’t broken. Just once I would like to see a team win a championship and make zero roster moves. Maybe that is unrealistic, but I don’t see why the Yankees traded away youth in Austin Jackson and Miguel Cabrera for a powerful bat and a dwindling arm. I don’t see how you let Johnny Damon go, and I don’t see how you let the World Series MVP go. That being said, the Yankees remain this division’s, and this league’s, best team. The only challenger will be the Red Sox, but I just don’t know where the Red Sox runs are going to come from. Until the Red Sox get in touch with a steroid guru, David Ortiz will not hit. Sorry, Red Sox fans, but your lovable slugger has been over the hill going on two years now. Mike Lowell moves like he spent the offseason in Antarctica, and Dustin Padroia cannot carry an offense. He won the MVP in 2007 because he had a line-up of guys you couldn’t pitch around. He will not see as many hittable pitches this year and is not about to carry the Red Sox offense. AL Central: Twins The Twins have by far the best lineup in this rela-

tively weak division. Mauer and Morneau give this team immediate power that the Tigers, White Sox, and Indians just don’t have. The concerns come when you look at the pitching staff. The Twins lack an ace, or so we think. Reports out of Fort Myers have Fransico Liriano throwing the ball in the mid nineties and having a ton of break on his off-speed pitches. (Remember Liriano? He was Cy Young and Walter Johnson’s jacked son in 2006, then he blew out his elbow and got fat.) In this division, that is really all the Twins need. A good dark horse here would be the White Sox; they bring two very good pitchers and a lineup that has potential. The Tigers have less than people think after Justin Verlander and seeing the way that their bullpen pitched down the stretch, it is hard for me to pick them. AL West: Mariners Not a lot of teams did more to help themselves in the offseason than the Mariners did. They added a solid leadoff guy in Chone Figgins, which is extra sweet because he is away from the division rival Angels. This was a great move for them. Just ask any Yankees fan and they will tell you about how Figgins was quite possibly the biggest pest on the Angels in the 2005 American League Division Series, and he was the guy we were most scared of in the 2009 Championship Series. Having him in the leadoff spot does great things for any offense, but not as much as adding Cliff Lee is going to do for that rotation. I know he will probably miss the first month, but baseball is a six-month-long sport. When he comes back, the Mariners will have Cliff Lee, Felix Hernandez, and the long-forgotten Eric Bedard to throw. Do you want to face those three pitchers in a playoff series, much less a weekend series? That is as stacked a rotation as this division has, which is another reason to jump aboard the Mariners’ bandwagon. This might be the weakest division in baseball, or at least in the AL. The Angels somehow survived losing the best pitcher in the franchise’s history last year, but they just lost one of their best bats and their ace John Lackey. I don’t care if Mike Scioscia is their manager and that they have owned the division in the past; the cards are too stacked against the Angels. I will not miss seeing them in the playoffs. AL Wildcard: Red Sox The Red Sox might be the second-best team in the American League. The AL East is just a gauntlet which the Red Sox may or may not win, but the idea that any other team is as good as them is absurd. I know they won’t score the amount of runs we are used to, but that staff is deep and talented. An October threat, although I hate to admit it. National League (NL) East: Phillies Listen to me when I say that this division will be wrapped up by the end of August. Trading for Roy Halladay will lead the Phillies to another pennant. Roy Halladay is about to unload something biblical on the NL East. Seriously--we are going to see numbers out of him that we haven’t seen since the deadball era. He was arguably the best pitcher in baseball, and he pitched in the AL East, which happens to be the most slugger-happy division in all of baseball. If he can win 19 games a year in that division for as long as he has, how many do you think he will rack up while in the NL? And don’t tell me there is no difference. The NL does not have the offensive firepower the AL does. C.C. Sabathia, as great a pitcher as he is, looked like Christy Mathewson in the National League, as did Cliff Lee. It is just easier to pitch in the NL.

Add the fact that this team has won the past two pennants and they obviously have a solid foundation. Their core group of players is as good as any I’ve seen, and they have quite the dynasty going. There is no reason for them to be bounced from the NL East throne as long as that core remains in tact. On another note, Cole Hamels has added 10-12 mph to his fastball in spring training. He had a mental lapse in the past year, but if the Phillies have him ready to go it could be a huge asset to that rotation. NL Central: Cardinals The Cards are really the only team that should be able to challenge the Phillies. They have a one-two punch in Carpenter and Wainwright that is decent-maybe a little overhyped, but decent nonetheless. Re-signing Matt Holliday was possibly the smartest thing the franchise has done yet; now that Pujols is protected in the lineup and can absolutely tee off on the good pitches you know he is going to get. This is now an offense that is formidable enough to challenge for a pennant. The problems lie in that I’m not sure how the back end of the rotation will perform, and Kyle Lohse, the guy with the absurd mustache, has not earned my vote of confidence. This team has holes, but look at the rest of the division. The biggest challenger might be Cincinnati, and when that happens, you know your division stinks. NL West: Dodgers I remember when the Dodgers were always that team that had the talent to compete for the pennant, but for some reason they never did win it. Then Joe Torre came onto the scene and it all changed. You’re welcome, Los Angeles. People say that managing in baseball has been reduced to some fat guy chewing seeds and taking up space. Let Joe Torre be the example that serves to change this perception. Besides the manager, the Dodgers have a lineup that has carried them to two straight NLCS’s. Yes, Manny continues to annoy us with his presence on this earth, but the man can still rake. Matt Kemp gives him protection, and in a division that has teams of more wild card type quality, I can see the Dodgers taking the crown again this year. If the Giants can score even a mediocre number of runs, they will make the race interesting, because Tim Lincecum and Matt Cain serve as the ultimate one-two combo. I see them as a big wild-card threat. N.L Wild Card: Giants While the race should be exciting, it will eventually mean nothing. There are five or six teams that can win the wild card, but none of them should make too much of a ruckus in the pennant race. The Giants should win because of the pitching, but they added some decent bats that should give them just enough to edge out teams like the Rockies, Braves, Reds, and others. ALCS: Yankees over Red Sox NLCS: Phillies over Cardinals World Series: Yankees over Phillies.

WRITE

for The Tattler

email editor@ihstattler.com

June 9, 2010

Not at All Senseless: Blind Soccer By KYLE ROTHMAN

Everyone has the aspiration to do what they love, but some may have to face extra adversity or challenge themselves to feel truly accomplished. If you have a disability, trying to play sports can be a challenge, but with the proper training and supervision, much can be achieved. Organizations that run sports for the visually impaired have been around for decades, and are present on nearly every continent. Since 1981, the International Blind Sports Federation (IBSF) has run as a non-profit organization in Paris. It has been encouraging those with visual impairments to participate in sports. The United States Association for Blind Athletes (USABA) has also been actively participating in enriching the lives of the visually impaired. Readers are probably wondering what being blind and playing sports must be like. Sight, while being a trait people use effectively, is not something that is necessary to live a fulfilling life. These organizations explore how to get beyond some disabilities in order to be productive through athletic activity. The IBSF and the USABA cover a wide range of athletic activities for the blind. Needless to say, some can be easier to picture than others. Sports like bowling, rowing, audio darts, and some basic athletics can be fairly easy to understand, as long as you can play and have someone see for you. For other games however, the challenge is much greater. Some examples of more challenging blind sports are archery, alpine skiing, beep baseball, beep hockey, rock climbing, bell basketball, karate, judo, cycling, and soccer. Of the blind sports, soccer is the most popular around the world. This sport originated in Spain. The game mainly consists of two 25-minute halves, with a 30-minute break at halftime. In five-side, there are five players per side, and all players aside from the goalie are blind. The goalie and one other

in-game supervisor take on even more responsibility during the game by becoming the eyes of the team. The five field players must hear his instruction to know where to head toward the goal. “But how would they ever know where the ball was?” you ask? Well, dear reader, that’s a good question. The soccer ball is equipped with a bell that will sound when in motion, so all of the players can sense it during the game. The five players are usually chosen for teams based on the degree of their visual impairment. For instance, B1 level athletes are completely to almost totally blind. B2 athletes are partially sighted, but have a very small field of vision, and B3 athletes are partially sighted, and have a somewhat larger field of vision. This system for determining a player’s group is necessary to make teams equal. Someone with even a slight field of vision will have the upper hand against a player who is completely blind. Because of this, B1 teams can only play B1 teams, but B2 and B3 athletes tend to mix together for competition. Blind soccer is hardly an unpopular or unheard of sport. Since its creation, countries all over the world have been finding the best players to use to compete with other nations. The largest competition takes place during the Summer Paralympic Games, which has hosted the sport since 2004. Championships were held before that as well, with great success. The countries with the most wins are Spain, Brazil, and Argentina. Of the many things that blind soccer has brought to the world, it engages those who were told they couldn’t play sports in a healthy athletic activity, where they can find the ferocity and rigor they crave. Without these supportive organizations, men and women all over the world would feel trapped by their disabilities, and hungry for athletic activity. Keep an eye out for some blind sports, because you will be amazed what people can accomplish with one fewer sense.

Why Sam Bradford Will Be an NFL Draft Bust By GEOFF PRESTON

When Sam Bradford’s name trickled from the mouth of NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell on draft night, it was met with stupendous applause by the 20 or so people who still root for the Rams. With Bradford, those fans could reminisce back to the days of Kurt Warner and Super Bowl runs in the glory days. I hate to be the overzealous cop that breaks up a party, but sorry, Rams fans, the party is over. Consider me the voice of reason in all of the Bradford talk. The Rams just drafted the next Ryan Leaf. Realistically though, this is not Bradford’s fault. If you want to blame someone, blame the Oklahoma Sooners and Bob Stoops. Bradford has all the right tools for NFL success: height, weight, arm strength, and accuracy. However, it was playing in Stoops’ wide-open,

shotgun-oriented offense that will ultimately spell doom for this number-one pick. Think about this: Bradford has not had to make a decision while backing up since before his high school days. He had the best offensive line in college football history the one year we saw him play, and when that offensive line began to falter, it seemed like we saw him either on the ground or being carted off the field. The Rams are not exactly world-famous for excellence in the offensive-line category. Bradford will be on the ground with startling frequency. And judging by his time on the ground last year, this will not be a good thing for the Rams. There are many criteria for a player to achieve “bust” status. A combination of bad organization, an overrated college career, and poor talent can lead to the labeling of a player

The Tattler accepts submissions of poetry and creative writing

email backpage@ihstattler.com

as a “bust.” Besides, Bradford did not play in a pro-style offense. With this spread-offense revolution that has overcome college football, we are going to see many more quarterbacks who are ill equipped to handle the ‘drop back, hand-it-off ’ style of a professional offense. A well-known fact in NFL history is that it evolves much slower than college football. It does not adapt to you, you adapt to it. Bradford now must adapt, and he is not alone. Colt McCoy and Tim Tebow will have to do the same and frankly, I don’t think they can. Bradford has talent, but that only gets you so far. How can he be expected to learn the complexities of a pro-style offense? Although that expectation will be there, it will only heighten the disappointment when he turns into the next Ryan Leaf. Good thing no one cares about the Rams.

Taurus (April 20 to May 20) - The number of times you walk into a door this month will cause you to seek out new ways of thinking. You might be a little bit bruised, but you will get help reading those books, and end up somewhere in the south of France this month. Gemini (May 21 to June 20) - Don’t let yourself get too neurotic. Follow your instincts, but repress those strange urges to bite people. It could get you in trouble later… You should contact a certain someone you haven’t talked to recently. Your efforts will be rewarded. You should also know that good hair runs in your family, along with your looks. Stellar, dude! Cancer (June 21 to July 22) - You are a lovely person with lots of energy. But be nicer to those around you; they feel under-appreciated. Brush up on your Hungarian and Turkish; they will come in handy. Be careful not to piss off those fairies, you need them on your side. We also see a nice surprise in your future. Your friend found the light so thank

Horoscopes: them with a nice cookie. You should watch some Lord of The Rings; Gandalf has something to tell you. Leo (July 23 to Aug 22) - Eat your veggies, and enjoy the weather. Dance with yourself, and watch some Glee, because it will always brighten your day. Virgo (Aug 23 to Sept 22) - Your innocence has been shattered. It may be funny now, but hope you don’t regret it later. Also, take a deep breath, hope for the best, and your hair will look even lovelier than it normally does. Libra (Sept 23 to Oct 22) - Don’t pee in public areas, even though that can be hard for you. Stay off the roof this month, because it will be windy. Scorpio (Oct 23 to Nov 21) - Beware of small insects this month. Have you seen that episode of the Twilight Zone? Yeah, enough said. You have been feeling spontaneous lately, so use that energy to go on an impromptu camping trip; the nice fresh air will do you good.

Sagittarius (Nov 22 to Dec. 21) - The moon and stars say buy a GPS because you will get lost this weekend. Blow off some steam and have some fun during this stressful time of year, but just don’t end up in a ditch. Love, be nice, and don’t mess around. Capricorn (Dec 22 to Jan 19) - Strange things are happening. Don’t question them; things will either make sense or they won’t. Stuff happens. Aquarius (Jan 20-Feb 18) - You may get caught in a large drain. This is all part of the plan the gnomes have for you so don’t question it. But buy some fish; they may be your only friends this month. Pisces (Feb 19-march 20) - You may find the person you creep on creeps on you just as much. Just don’t let them see you while you are at their window. Also, invest in some night vision goggles; you will need them. Aries (Mar 21 to April 19) - The sun will smile down on you this month!

A Poem Hi

as if it held more weight than it does. because we only ever want to say more than our minds can conjour up in the passing--when eyes meet. and always we wish we could mean more, in less words to save our breaths. So leave the rest to eyes and say that simple word,

ions to the IHS Class of t a l u at ng r

2010!

Check out the many ways you can be part of the Kitchen Theatre this summer:

ÊUÊSee a wonderful comedy:

CHESAPEAKE (running June 23-July 18)

ÊUÊVolunteer to help with the ÊUÊIntern in our marketing or production departments

Contact Stephen@KitchenTheatre.org for more information

T I C K E T S : 607-273-4497 or 1-800-28-ITHACA W E B : www.KitchenTheatre.org T H E AT E R : 116 N. Cayuga St. Ithaca, NY 14850

HELP WANTED The Tattler needs

cartoonists, columnists,

Name-Swapping

Picnics

Birthdays

Defectiv Cat

The Cornell Clock Tower Yearbook Cover Angry Birds

Spring Allergies

move into our new theater

whether you know why or why not, you do. Hi.

Clean Tattler Office

Waving

By A. A. Talex

Don’t you love how we say the word:

SUMMER!!

photographers, and most of all, email editor@ihstattler.com for more information

writers.

Calls from the Cafeteria Unnecessary projects Hot classrooms

SATs