Photo by Eros Goze Hair & make up by Frankie Melendez Bespoke necklace by Garimon Raferos Wrap by Dita Sandico-Ong
EDITOR’S NOTE
Firing up your passions
I grew up seeing an older generation of Filipinos conditioned to settle for the cookie-cutter idea of life. You grow into adulthood, you settle down young, make yourself a family, and then devote all your energies to bringing up the kids. And finally, before you know it, you’ve hit your retirement years, and sink into the proverbial “rocking chair” waiting for the twilight of your life. It’s a common formula. Still, it is not a way of life that is exclusive to the generation of our parents and the ones before them. At times, you could see the same symptoms with folks who are (supposedly) currently at the prime of their life. Are you a zombie? One of those who goes through the motions of life with a blank stare, drifting from routine-to-routine, allowing yourself to be swallowed by the banality of the day-to-day. It’s the widespread lethargia of contemporary life - a lot of us inevitably get overwhelmed by work, responsibilities, commitments, and sometimes self-imposed cultural limitations. Sometimes, it’s because we’re tired (or most likely, “sick and tired”), or plain lazy, or perhaps we’ve simply resigned ourselves that this is how life is. We feel empty and unexcited, but just can’t be bothered to make an effort or don’t know how to shake off that gnawing feeling inside. Wouldn’t it be nice to get up in the morning all pumped-up and enthusiastic to meet the new day’s promise? Wouldn’t it be good to feel that you are truly living instead of just merely existing? Find your passion. Discover what makes you feel alive, that which deserves your time, effort and commitment; that special something worth taking a big leap for, that keeps you going even through life’s seemingly boring routines, as well as the tough times. Passion is not just the exclusive domain of couples and lovers. It is when you see yourself intensely driven and energized in the name of worthy pursuits, or the things and causes you feel strongly about, and give you immense joy. Being passionate means doing something greater than yourself, giving the world your very own contribution. Whether that may be big or small, or you, young or old, able-bodied or not, is immaterial. The most important thing is that you poured yourself into something worthy of your God-given gifts, redeeming yourself from a life that is lived without a purpose, revolving solely on routine and the obvious. Do not settle. Demand for more in life. Because a life without passion is a life not lived at all. There is no passion to be found playing small - in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living. Nelson Mandela Taas Noo, Filipino! LALAINE CHU-BENITEZ Publisher and Editor-in-Chief
CONTRIBUTORS Alfred “Krip” A. Yuson Esteemed writer Krip Yuson tells us all about “Dating a Girl.”The fact that he has authored more than 20 literary titles - from poetry, short stories, children’s stories, biographies, and translation - will make it difficult not to see Krip Yuson’s by-line in the Filipinana section or in a national broadsheet. Add the title of Carlos Palanca Memorial Awards for Literature Hall-of-Famer and the UMPIL or Writers’ Union of the Philippines’ Gawad Balagtas for lifetime achievement, plus a host of other titles and you’ll know that Krip is part of the elite circle of literary royalty.
Bo Sanchez An expert on the subject of love and all things spiritual, Bo Sanchez is a bestselling author, respected speaker, and Ten Outstanding Young Men (TOYM) awardee. He is also the most handsome and romantic man in the world, according to his wife, whom he has dated 690 times (and counting) throughout their 13 years of marriage. In this issue, he shares the secrets of keeping the flame alive between couples.
Ana Santos
Margarita Go Singco Holmes & Jeremy Baer In the Philippines, when it comes to relationships, the names Dr. Margarita Holmes and Jeremy Baer are the firsts that come to mind. This husband and wife team can give advice that is both straight up and compassionately gentle. In their monthly column, they answer questions from readers, presenting a dual take on the situation: the men’s point of view from the women’s; from theWesterner’s point of view to the Filipina, sometimes the only difference in their advice is the manner by which they deliver it. Dr. Margarita Holmes is a celebrated clinical psychologist, author, TV personality and professor, while former banker Jeremy Baer is a psychotherapist in training, about to finish his first book.
Manny Escosa
Is an emotional affair considered cheating?
Illustrado’s Associate Editor Ana Santos asks the burning question in this month’s feature ‘Emotional Sin.’ Ana, writes for glossies in the Philippines, as well as foreign wires on specific women’s issues, and also runs www. sexandsensibilities.com (SAS), a website with culturally sensitive sexual health information for young Filipinas. She is also the author of ‘Happy Even After: A Solo Mom’s Journal, a book filled with inspirational stories and spunky quotes from other Pinay solo moms.
Agnes Aquino StottBriggs Illustrado Style and Image columnist, Woman of Substance 2011 Honoree and Philippine Business Council – Abu Dhabi Chairman Agnes Aquino Stott-Briggs is a woman on a mission - to educate and empowermenandwomenwithconfidence that comes with looking their best and believing in themselves to achieve their goals. This multi-talented lady who has a degree in Economics, and has successfully run businesses in real estate and interior design, is a Certified Image and Personal Consultant, armed with training from the Philippines’prestigious Cora Doloroso Finishing School, and the Sterling Style Academy USA – one of the world’s leading Image and Style institutes.
Dano Tingcungco Multimedia journalist DanoTingcungco has traveled to various parts of the Philippines for work and play. He started out as a travel writer for various Manila-based publications beforeeventuallyenteringmainstreammedia. Besides traveling, he also has a passion for fashion and has a penchant for various kinds of bags from the staid to the obscure. Dano writes about the Calatagan Mangrove Conservation Park and though he can attest to its rustic romance appeal, he will spend a quiet Valentine’s Day with his partner at home.
Manny Escosa is a marketing professional involved in some of the most original campaigns in the Philippines. His keen observation skills are developed when he travels with his wife to several locations in the world. Manny found a passion for writing when he challenged himself how to best capture in words the gestalt of all his travels. This has raised his awareness of the vast and surprising world we live in. In this month’s issue of Illustrado, Manny writes about discovering the wonders of Donsol
Ana Oposa
Anna Oposa just graduated cum laude with a degree in English Studies from the University of the Philippines in Diliman. She is passionate about the environment, tourism, the Philippines, and most of all, learning. Anna is a health buff who runs, swims and does yoga. She also doesn’t eat beef and rice not so much for health reasons, but for the sake of the environment. In this issue, Anna explores how the concept of wooing one’s lady love has evolved through the years in the Philippine.
6 LETTERS TO THE EDITOR
Send your letters to: editor@illustrado.net or join the discussion at IIlustrado Magazine’s Facebook page
Mind blowing!!! I’ve always loved your fashion editorials, but this one is just awesome! You guys owned it! It’s amazing that you take the risk of showing something so out of this world and unexpected, instead of just churning out the usual safe, beauty-oriented uber cheesy fashion feature. Kudos for being fierce, Illustrado! John Florencio LOUD and PROUD!!! More power Illustrado Magazine! Galing ng Filipino! Aries Cruz Maglalang
Continuous inspiration to other Filipinos... Bring on the features and articles Lalaine ChuBenitez! Regina Martin-Marauta We love our Filipina yayas… Hend Al Qassemi Couldn’t have gotten to where we are now without them. So grateful… Kat Legarda
OF Blues
Wickedly Avant Garde Another out-of-the box editorial from two of my most favorite creative individuals! The amalgamation of the most bizarre pieces by Chris Diaz, Leeroy New, OS Accessories and Gold Dot was incredible. Weeks before the shoot, I was informed by Enzo and Eric that there will be an editorial and when I saw the mood board, I was so excited. Aliens and anything extra- terrestrial are so close to my heart and with them you can never get anything mediocre. I’ve always loved how they tell a story... How they manipulate the clothes, shoes and whatever things they can grab to weave a mind-blowing plot. Shoes will not just remain shoes in their editorials. Karl Leuterio It rocks!! Well done to the Illustrado Magazine team. You guys do a sterling job - always! Cynthia Villanueva I have never seen a local editorial as fierce, out-of-the-box, and twisted as this! An amazing take on avant garde designers! Just found out about the magazine now, but the artistry of this editorial makes me crave for more! AMAZING! I will definitely buy your magazine from now on! Jebby Fronda
Your magazine really makes me want to get into the fashion business even more! I’m a fashion design student aspiring to be one of your featured designers someday. I wait for your monthly fash feature and imagine myself getting involved in such an interestingly stylish project. January was super! Avant garde and “sick” are my fave words – no kidding! And the stuff you’ve shown just plays up to my unconventional imagination. Looking forward to the day my work will be featured in Illustrado… Chanel Sarmenta
More than Just the Help This refers to your feature “Ang Nanny ng Tahanan: More than Just the Help,” which I have read with much appreciation. Thank you for giving Filipina nannies the dignity they deserve. This comes at a time, when it’s typical to see our domestic helpers getting a bad rap in letters sections in local newspapers. You hear people complaining about absconders, nannies who have “boyfriends” and those who have done bad things. It’s unfair to the many others who are doing a good job, while sacrificing being away from their own families – especially those who take care of their employers’ children like their own.
Wiiiiiicked! Yen Red AB
I should know, we have a nanny at home who has been with us through the last seven years. She has helped me and my husband and while our two kids were growing up and supported me as a working mom. Without her and her care for my kids, we will be helpless.
I can’t help but stare at Kate!! This is an amazingly disturbing masterpiece!!! Aze Sazaki
So thank you for telling the story of the second mom nanny. These women deserve praise. Lorna Regino
May tanong po ako... Paki-sagot ng inyong nasa sa loob o palagay, please? OFW, Bagong Bayani, o ano man ang tawag sa iyo pag ikaw ay nasa labas ng bansa mo, paano mo ilalagay ang iyong sarili? Nag-iisa ka man o kasama mo ang pamilya mo sa bansang iyong kinalalagayan, paano mo dadamahin na ikaw ay buhay at nasa iyong tahanan, kung malayo ka sa iyong pamilya at bansang pinagmulan? Ang inyong sagot ay napakalaking tulong. Maraming salamat po. Darwin Guevarra
Dear Darwin Guevarra, Mahirap talagang malayo sa pamilya. Isipin mo na lang na may pinaglalaanan ka na mabuti habang nakakaramdam ng homesickness habang nag-tatrabaho dito sa ibang bansa. Isa pa, always keep a positive attitude. Ikaw lang ang makakapag-paligaya sa iyong sarili. Mayroon ngang kasabihan – “happiness is a choice.” So, piliin mo na maging masayahin kahit nalalayo sa bansang pinagmulan. Pagbutihan mo ang pagtatrabaho mo at itaguyod ang pagiging isang mabuting Filipino. Huwag mo ring kalimutan na alagaan ang iyong sarili at mag-relax paminsan-minsan. Tao lang tayong lahat. We need to take care of ourselves. Pasasaan ba at lilipas din ng mabilis ang panahon, lalo na kung nililibang mo ang sarili mo sa mga productive at magagandang bagay alang-alang sa ikabubuti mo at ng iyong pamilya. Editor
Publisher & Editor-in Chief Lalaine Chu-Benitez Associate Editor Ana Santos CONTRIBUTING WRITERS UAE, Philippines, USA Aby Yap Anna Lorraine Balita JR Bustamante Bernadette Reyes Jude Cartalaba Bo Sanchez Karen Galarpe Carlito Viriña KC Abalos David Poarch Krip Yuson Excel Dyquiangco Nikka Sathou Flordeliz Samonte Nina Terol- Zialcita Francisco Colayco Rache Hernandez Isabelo Samonte Rome Jorge Ivan Henares Toni Loyola Jack Catarata Sonny Guzman Jesse Edep Vic Lactaoen ART DIRECTORS Tom Bolivar Paula Lorenzo Ron Perez CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS UAE Eros Goze Mariyah Gaspacho Christina Linaza Illuminado Ong Donald Rosales CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS PHILIPPINES Enzo Mondejar Dr. Marlon Pecjo Alan Desiderio CONTRIBUTING STYLISTS & FASHION TEAM UAE Jessie Tabla Ginno Alducente Jojo Padua Frankie Melendez PUBLISHER - UAE Illustrado Communications FZ-LLC 2nd Floor, Building 2, P.O. Box 72280 Office 20C Dubai Media City, UAE Tel: +9714 365 4543, 365 4547 Fax:+9714 360 4771 E-mail: admin@illustrado.net, info@illustrado.net Web: www.illustrado.net, www.illustradolife.com PRINTERS PRINTWELL PRINTING LLC P.O. Box 18828 Dubai, UAE Copyright Illustrado Communications FZ-LLC 2006-2012. All rights reserved. No part of this magazine may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without the written permission of Illustrado Communications FZ-LLC.
CONTENTS
54 FEB 2012
This issue’s wild fashion affair with nature features model Cristal Mendoza shot at the Calatagan Mangrove Conservation Park
84
FEATURES
Uso pa ba ang Ligaw? 14 Pocket-Sized Passions 20 Emotional Sin 24 If the Skirt Fits: Tales of Andres de Saya 28
REGULAR COLUMNS
Editor’s Note 1 Letters 6 Illuminati: Date a Girl 12 Pinoy Pro 32 It’s What I Do 34 Pinoy Entrepreneur 36 Kabuhayan – Entrepreneurship: MedChef 38 Kabuhayan – Money: Looking for a Rich Husband? 40 Relationships: Head in a Noose 44 Spirituality: I Still Date my Ex 46 Style & Image: Color and You 46 Illustrado Scrapbook 52 Trippin’: Five Things to Do 72 Global Barrio News 88 Onli in Da Pilipins: King and Queen of Hearts 90
FASHION
Impassion 54 Illustrado Runway: Furne One at The Bride Show Abu Dhabi 66 Illustrado Couture Gallery 67
PEOPLE & PLACES
Illustrado Profile: Breaking is Sharing – B-Boy Jerome Aparis 74 My Pinoy Life in: Norway 78 Bakasyon Grande: Sharks, Fire and Sun On-Board a Banca 84 Trippin’: Calatagan Conservation Park 88
78
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14 ILLUMINATI
DATE
a girl … By Krip Yuson
It all started with a mock-tough essay by Charles Warnke, a 21-year-old American writer, which showed up in the Internet early last year. It was titled “You should date an illiterate girl.” Cynical lines posed injunctions from the get-go: “Date a girl who doesn’t read. Find her in the weary squalor of a Mid-western bar. Find her in the smoke, drunken sweat, and varicolored light of an upscale nightclub… Engage her with unsentimental trivialities. Use pickup lines and laugh inwardly. Take her outside when the night overstays its welcome. Ignore the palpable weight of fatigue. Kiss her in the rain under the weak glow of a streetlamp because you’ve seen it in film. Remark at its lack of significance…. “Don’t date a girl who reads because girls who read are the storytellers. … The girl who reads has spun out the account of her life and it is bursting with meaning. She insists that her narratives are rich, her supporting cast colorful, and her typeface bold. You, the girl who reads, make me want to be everything that I am not. But I am weak and I will fail you, because you have dreamed, properly, of someone who is better than I am.” Now, that was fine writing. Surprisingly, barely a month later, a young Filipina, Rosemarie Urquico, responded with a piece that also went viral among Pinoy FB adherents and bloggers. (A pity that as with Warnke, we can only quote brief excerpts.)
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“Date a girl who reads. Date a girl who spends her money on books instead of clothes. She has problems with closet space because she has too many books…. “… If you find a girl who reads, keep her close. When you find her up at 2 AM clutching a book to her chest and weeping, make her a cup of tea and hold her. You may lose her for a couple of hours but she will always come back to you. She’ll talk as if the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they always are. “… Date a girl who reads because you deserve it. You deserve a girl who can give you the most colorful life imaginable. If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours and halfbaked proposals, then you’re better off alone. If you want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads. “Or better yet, date a girl who writes.” Well, late last year I got into the spirit of things, and posted the following on my FB Wall, titled “You should date a girl who farts, openly”: Date a girl who lies. Date a girl who practices all sorts of subtle deceit. She
ILLUMINATI 15 will teach you the ways of the world, as if you didn’t know it yet. She will affirm what you have suspected all along, that everyone thinks you’re a child who can only be told of happy gifts. And that everybody else cheats or dispenses bull. Keep dating a girl who unfriends you when she doesn’t want you to see photos of her with other men in Facebook. The hurt will stun you, and prepare you for the mysteries of the next life, equip you with something better than religion. Date her still, so you can block her when she cries foul over your own sense of democratization. Date a girl who laughs, whose hair is wild and who closes her eyes in rapturous sleep once you run your fingers through her curls. She is also likely to laugh at most of what the Pope says. Date a girl who farts, openly, without rancor or remorse. It doesn’t mean she’s bereft of social graces, just that she accepts life as it is, with all of its myriad chemical processes that can only be masked to a fault. By breaking wind, in public, she manifests her willingness to participate in an edgy universe. She will be prepared to hold your hand when any s*it hits the fan. Date a girl who shares your whisky. She will kiss as well as anyone who understands why the Isle of Islay is truly a blessed spot on earth. She will speak with you with such depth and clarity. She will appreciate a meteor shower while you vacation in a pool villa by the dark sea at midnight. And her eyes will follow the tracks of Orion and a gibbous moon while you adore her on your knees. Date a girl who loves the sun, who won’t mind getting a natural tan without all those lotions that screen off the beneficence of Vitamin A or D. Date a girl who’s confident that her face will not dry up sooner than your desire. Date a girl who will think nothing of staying supine on a naked beach at high noon before the Classic Burger comes on a tray and is placed by the resort hotel staff on the shaded part of the canvas chaise lounge under the big blue umbrella, with all those fries and a small
saucer filled with ketchup. She will love the onion rings as much as you do. And you’ll compete for them before you both run off to the silvery surf anew. Date a girl who does all those: lies, laughs, farts openly, drinks whisky, gains a tan for the sake of it — for she will be your mirror, and exaggerate your excesses. But if you find yourself too weak and can’t stand your own face and warts, then rethink your typology of dalliances. And since you don’t want to date a boy, maybe you’re better off with a plant. Why, you can watch it grow, or be assured it does, even away from you, without sadness or blame. With just some water. And sun. And a few words from you, or many words, that are heard, and heeded. Or so you think.” Friend Alma Anonas-Carpio responded with her own rather lengthy piece, of which we can only quote very briefly: “All the single ladies need an earthy man, a man rooted in reality, a man who is prepared to get his hands dirty in the name of getting the necessaries done so love can be had. My advice to them is to date a man who picks his nose without embarrassment or shame, wherever such picking may be needed, when it is required. “Such a man who is man enough to pick his nose will be honest about the fact that boogers happen and have no grace about where they happen. He is honest enough to accept the truth that the body’s functions have a timing of their own and he will accept that you, despite all your pulchritude, will PMS at the most inconvenient of times. He will accept it when you are hors d’ combat and just cannot do it every time desire hits and still love you, in spite of….” Of course her piece was titled “Date a man who picks his nose.” Okay. Well, you get the drift, and the picture. Happy Valentine’s Day!
16 FEATURE
a b a p Uso ? w a g ang li
By Anna Oposa
In the Philippines, say the word ligaw and traditional practices, bold promises of forever and flamboyant gestures will come to mind. But with the advent of the Internet, social media and the burgeoning influence of Western culture, the meaning and methods of ligaw have changed significantly. Anna Oposa checks in to see if technology and social media have cramped the Pinoy Casanova’s style. In the olden times, the young binata would visit the dalaga’s family armed with gifts and introduce himself formally - and perhaps wait for their benediction - before pursuing her. The traditional dalagang Pilipina is then expected to play coy and hard-to-get at first. And this coy and dalaga game would embolden him to set up stage underneath his beloved’s balcony, crooning his heart out, “Ibubuhos ko ang buong puso
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ko/Sa isang munting harana para sayo.” Fast forward to today and some of those practices are just vague memories of a time past. Meeting the parents is still a big deal, but it comes after the couple is more secure with each other. Handwritten love letters have been replaced by e-mails and text messages. Different generations have different definitions and expectations.
While much has changed in the Philippine ligaw landscape, much has also remained the same.
Defining and redefining ligaw One thing that has changed is the definition of courtship (ligaw). Now it is dependent on one’s age.
FEATURE 17
Those in their 20s think the idea of courtship is almost foreign. “The term ligaw is so old; it no longer applies to my generation,” says Olivia, 23. She’s currently taking her masters in Italy. Those in their 20s think the idea of courtship is almost foreign. “The term ligaw is so old; it no longer applies to my generation,” says Olivia, 23. She’s currently taking her masters in Italy. Kian, a project manager for a water company, 26, agrees. “Statements like ‘tatawirin ko ang ilog, kukunin ko ang mga bituin para makuha ang iyong matamis na oo’ have been replaced by something more casual, like ‘Hi, what’s up?’ via Facebook, text, or e-mail.” Olivia offers two observable dating trends: Friends-with-Benefits and HOHOL (Hang Out Hang Out Lang). She describes the former as one that is “often employed
by people who are not ready to commit.” HOHOL is for “the more docile human beings.” It focuses on personality and common interests. She explains, “This includes a lot of hanging out, watching movies, and eating out as ‘friends.’” But on the other hand, Alexa, a mother of three in her 40s, still subscribes to the old idea of ligaw. “The man I’m with now sang for me and recorded his voice using my cellphone back in 2004. I found it refreshing that he still wooed me using the old and forgotten ways of letter writing, modern day harana, flowers, and chocolates. It transported me back to how it was before.” She relishes the thought of women being worth the extra effort.
“During the early stage of courtship, the woman is the one in control. She has the power to decide whether to give the man a chance or not.”
Love bytes And sometimes for those in between, the way that the internet has been known to make and/or break relationships, adds another layer of complication. Chely, a 30-year-old communications manager, thinks that social media “has enabled a population of stalkers.” With the vast amount of friendship available on Facebook, it has become a common practice to do a background check and
18 FEATURE
Technology and social media have definitely changed the Pinoy Casanova style. Gone are the nights when the young binata would belt a harana underneath the stars while the dalaga watches from the balcony, playing pakipot. went on a date,” Stella shared. They have been together for over a year and have discussed tying the knot. Not everyone is as lucky. Couples have broken up because of tagged photos and FourSquare, a location-based social networking application where you can “check in” venues using Facebook or your smartphone. PMs are more potent.
research guys they like on Facebook to answer what they feel are vital questions: “Is he cute? Is he single? Where did he go to school? Who are his exes? Who are his friends?” Some check if - in the precariously small degree of separation, they are remotely related. And in some cases, Facebook serves to be more efficient and multi-tasking than any other human bridge could be. More and more are updating their relationship status to “In a relationship” and more and more
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people are “liking” Facebook love stories. Stella, a 24-year-old business developer, and her boyfriend Ivan, a 26-year-old law student, started communicating on Facebook. They knew of each other because they went to the same high school, but it wasn’t until after college that they reconnected. When Ivan was in America for vacation, he added Stella on Facebook and they started an exchange of private messages (PMs). “We talked about our favorite movies, books, and life philosophies. When he was about to go home, he asked for my number, and we
Bella, 40, a pre-school teacher, and her colleague Greg, 42, were caught by their spouses exchanging naughty PMs over Facebook. Bella’s husband forgave her, but she was given hell by Greg’s wife. True to the old adage that hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, Greg’s wife created a website exposing their affair and emailed the details to their co-workers. The scandal put a strain on their marriage and ruined Bella’s reputation in the school. She was forced to resign from her job just to save face.
Going the distance The Internet has also encouraged the proliferation of long-distance relationships and has helped start some, too. Not too long ago, one would have to wait months to receive a letter from the other side of the world. With smartphones, Skype, and e-mail, interaction is in real time.
FEATURE 19
However, long distance relationships still require extra effort due to the time difference and physical separation. Andi, 25, a freelance writer, and her thenboyfriend were together for almost two years before he moved to America for a scholarship. They tried a long distance relationship for another two years. “It got exhausting because it collapsed into a routine. We could only talk when I was about to sleep and he had just woken up, and vice versa.” Andi also thinks their age played a major factor in their split. “He needed to stay in the States for at least five years to get his green card. We were only 21 then, and the idea of being apart until we were 26 was too daunting.”
Love or something like it However, Andi believes that long distance relationships don’t work for the same reasons that their equivalent face-to-face relationships don’t. “The dynamics are just different, but you need the same things: trust, fidelity, constant communication, and fundamental similarities, such as in religion and politics,” she said. For Alexa, only the style and duration of entering a relationship has changed. “It’s faster and easier now because of tools like Facebook and Skype. But National Bookstore still sells Hallmark cards. On Valentine’s Day, people still go to Dangwa and buy flowers. Romantic movies still draw a crowd,” she pointed out. “No matter the method, love is love,” she says.
Giovanni, 34, businessman:
Stella, 24, business developer:
Showing a girl your assets but hiding the liability, and hoping to get a favorable response in the process.
When the guy puts his best foot forward. I don’t believe in it because from the get-go and all throughout the relationship, both your feet should be in it.
Priscilla, 32, corporate lawyer: False advertisement. Akala mo best foot forward, athlete’s foot lang pala!
Chely, 30, communications manager: The art of pursuit. If you have intentions of getting into a relationship, you need to be deliberate. The act of pursuing shows courage in one’s character. Guessing games, as much as they provide thrill, are for the uncertain. Great roads like love should be experienced surefooted.
Kian, 26, project manager:
Ligaw is…
He says, she says: How do the Filipinos of today define ligaw?
Technology and social media have definitely changed the Pinoy Casanova style. Gone are the nights when the young binata would belt a harana underneath the stars while the dalaga watches from the balcony, playing pakipot. But this doesn’t mean that Facebook and Twitter have cramped the romantic flair that Pinoys are known for. If anything, they have enabled us to be more creative and perhaps even more expressive — with sparks to be had with just a few clicks. Love letters arrive faster via e-mail and PM. Bold promises of forever and flamboyant gestures come in the form of Facebook status updates and blog entries for the rest of the World Wide Web to see. Much may have changed in the Philippine ligaw landscape, but much has remained the same.
Best foot forward, perfect gentleman, I-can-do-no-wrong kind of ligaw that takes time and more often than not, is decided by the parents if it’s to continue or not.
Juancho, 23, industrial engineer: When a guy puts his best foot forward in order to impress a girl and show her that he can be trusted and is worth the girl’s time. Ultimately, it is a way of showing a girl that he will love her and take care of her and fulfill the duties of a boyfriend.
Olivia, 23, fashion student: A man’s strategy in marketing ones self towards the opposite sex. The aim is to get a woman to invest in them for the long run, particularly in the emotional and sexual sense. Ligaw is no longer done by men alone. Now, we girls are able to make a move on a guy without him noticing, and him actually thinking he thought of it first!
20 ADVERTORIAL “Infinity Tour.’ Charice, the amazing singer that rose to international stardom via several performance stints at the Oprah Winfrey shows, is best loved for her soul, pop and cool RnB songs. Songs from her infinity album include tracks penned by Bruno Mars (“Before it Explodes” and “Louder”) and Nick Jonas (“One Day”).
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“Charice’s legion of Dubai and UAE fans can expect an evening of songs never before seen on You Tube or on-screen and many of them will be taken from her new album and her favorite songs that made her popular all over the globe,” said Zoha Beig, CEO of 321 Events. Tickets are now on sale online at www. platinumlist.ae, www.timeouttickets.com, Time Out Tickets Box office (Dubai Media City), as well as at Tagpuan/Tipanan restaurants, Salt’n’Pepper restaurants and select Spinneys outlets early February. Tickets are priced at: AED95 (regular) and AED195 (front pit). Doors open at 7PM. For more information, contact 321 Events at 04-450 3505 or 055-369 1324.
4 Trends in Shoe Mart S/S12 Offering
Charice to Wow Fans in Dubai 321 Events is bringing 19-year old international singing sensation CHARICE to perform in a one night only concert on Friday, March 2, 2012 at the Festival Park of Dubai Festival City as part of her
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This Spring Summer’ 12, Shoe Mart lets you stand out in style with many beautiful statement pieces to offer. The
new collection launches with four exciting directional trends of the Season. Color Clash: dedicated to a 70s revival this trend is all about statement and excess. Featured are explosions of clashing colors, patterns and bold statement power prints, on an exciting offering of wearable and directional shapes. Cork platforms, rope wedges and flat pumps continue to be the most fashion forward shapes under this trend. While rainbow EVA cleated soles bring a fresh sports luxe feel. Soft Bohemian: a feminine look with a softer approach. A lush sorbet ice cream palette, mixed with natural tones and delicate girly fabrics, lace, crochet, embroidery anglais and linen define the mood of this collection. Pretty ditsy prints continue, along with vintage inspired oriental treatments. Fruit prints and stars offer the fun element to this trend. Key pieces include espadrille raffia wedges and cork platforms, along with cutesy ballerinas. Urban Traveller: a collection featuring Hawaiian hibiscus and baroque patterns, cracked metallic, hi shine mirror, as well as flashes of wild animal prints, with mixes of patents, and suede, along with key tribal influences of Aztec and tie due printed fabrics. Treatments on both heels and flats are ethnic finishes of cork and wood. New shapes emerging are the Japanese inspired wedges, and towering stacked platforms finished off with statement ankle bracelets. Sassy Sailor: takes inspiration from the sea and carries a palette of vibrant shades and clashing bold colors. While every trendy outfit remains incomplete without a blend of spots and stripes mixed together, and elevated espadrilles in cool tones of blue, yellow, red and white. Sassy sailor gives a nod to sports luxe with Moccasins and loafers in a palette of blue, yellow, white and earth brown. Hardware makes a clear statement with military type buttons, buckles and rope designs.
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POCKETSIZED PASSION: The perennial appeal of the Tagalog Romance Novel By Barbara Marchadesch
Every day after work, Carol Ignacio, 32, takes the bus home after clocking in a full day as a salesperson. It used to be the worst part of her day, stuck in unmoving rush hour traffic with nothing to do but play games on her cell phone and stare at the back of the seat in front of her. Desperate to stave off the boredom, she decided to bring along a book that her friend Annette had lent her. It was a slim paperback, not much more than one hundred pages long, about a young secretary who falls for her boss. It would provide enough diversion for the ride home, she thought, and she could finally return it to her friend afterwards. That was the beginning of an obsession with Tagalog Romance novels that has lasted to this day, more than ten years later. After she finished the first book, she asked her friend for another, and then another. Soon she was buying her own books to read on the bus. It takes her two or three bus commutes to finish a book, and she estimates that she buys about 50 titles a year on average.
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FEATURE 23 according to Malou Medina, editor at romance novel publishers Bookware, the authors’ demographic is quite diverse. “We’ve had writers who submitted their work and got published when they were still in high school,” she said. “We have writers who are career women and just write in their free time. We have writers who are really writers by profession and graduates of reputable universities. College students, housewives. Some of these authors are readers of Tagalog romance and most of them just really love to write.” One such writer is Edith Joaquin, whose series X My Heart ranks among some of the company’s best-sellers. Joaquin’s first novel was published in 2003 and now she is writing full time.
Because of devotees like Carol, there is money to be made in the Tagalog romance industry, for publishers and authors alike. The books have long been favorites among local readers, for many reasons. The books usually cost around the PHP30 to PHP70 range, depending on whether they’re regular books or part of a special or bestselling series. They’re small enough to fit into your pocket or your purse, and page for page they deliver just as much kilig and romance as a movie or a telenovela. And in their own way, they make life a little easier for people like Carol.
The write stuff Tagalog romance novels might not be timeless classics, but they’re not trying to be. Their purpose is to entertain, thrill and amuse, and in that respect they deliver in spades. They’re entertaining, sometimes unabashedly cinematic in their plotlines and resolutions, and often cheesy. The writing quality varies wildly, but it would be wrong to think that romance novelists don’t take their work seriously, or that there isn’t real talent in the field. Most romance novelists are women, but
Her series struck a chord with readers, and raised her profile as an author. “Although I’d been writing for quite a time, ‘popular’, where I am concerned, is fairly new,” said Joaquin. What isn’t new is her love for the genre. Before she became a writer of romance novels, she was an avid reader of them. As she grew older and moved on from Ladybird books and then Nancy Drew mysteries, she was drawn to her aunt’s large collection of Mills and Boon paperbacks. “What I liked about them, for one, was the fact that I thought the writers were really witty, having been able to put together the conversations I read in the books,” she said. “Second, I am a romantic at heart, and I do love happy endings.” Joaquin eventually made the jump from reader to writer for a very good reason. “The decision to try out writing came out of need for financial augmentation,” she said. “I wasn’t earning enough back then and I loved my job too much to quit. So my friend and I thought, we’re both writers, why don’t we try novels? And we also thought, it couldn’t be that hard. So we bought a few pocketbooks and yes, we thought it wasn’t hard. After our first try, we just went on and on and now, eight years since I first tried it, I will say I love writing novels and I can’t really imagine myself not being into it anymore.”
Addicted to love It’s not hard to figure out why these slim pocketbooks are constantly bestsellers. They’re entertaining, they’re inexpensive, and their appeal is universal. “Maybe it’s because romance books depict an ‘ideal’ life,” said Joaquin. “Romance novels keep your faith in ‘happy ever afters.’” Medina agreed. “In my opinion, Tagalog romance novels are popular because they’re effective in entertaining people. They become a form of escape to them,” she says. “Reading them transports them to a world where fantasies come true and happy endings can happen to everyone.” Bookware publishes the very popular My Special Valentine series (which includes Edith Joaquin’s work). Romance novels tend to focus more on the romance than on the sex, but sometimes going a little risqué pays dividends. “Two years ago we introduced an imprint entitled Desire and it became really popular with our market,” said Medina. “It’s still Tagalog Romance, but with a sexier plot, sensual but not erotic.” Series (several books tied by having characters, settings or storylines in common, written by the same author) are also very popular. “All our books are popular with the readers. Pero we had a four-book series entitled Palikeros na nagstand out talaga, sold-out agad siya. Then, we have an on-going book series called Sentinels, popular din. Military romance naman yun.” The supply is also practically inexhaustible. The big companies publish more than a hundred titles every year, and new writers are always joining the fold. Publishers make it easy for amateurs to become professionals; every copy contains an exhortation to readers to try their hand at writing, and information on how to submit manuscripts. The habits of romance readers help the industry. Readers tend to end up with whole collections of books, thanks not only to the books’ appeal but their portability and price. Carol picks up four or five books at a time, then “recycles”, passing some of
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them on to her friends and co-workers— converting some into Tagalog romance aficionados just like her friend did for her many years before.
In stores and on the web Carol fits the main demographic of Tagalog Romance readers: female and belonging to the C-D income bracket. Within that category, though, readers can still be pretty diverse—“high school and college students, career women, housewives,” says Medina. Tagalog Romance novels take up several shelves’ worth of space at any National Bookstore branch, and can even be found on sale in pharmacies and sari-sari stores. Carol buys her books from the bookstore, but websites such as pinoypocketbooks. com and Bookware’s own site also allow local and overseas readers to order them online and have the books shipped to them anywhere in the world. They can also rate books on the sites and communicate with their favorite authors and their fellow fans in forums or on the authors’ pages.
Living on love stories According to Edith Joaquin, writers are paid after their manuscript is approved—
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the check comes in about two weeks later. Writers are not given an advance, nor do they get any royalties, but the industrious, prolific writer can make a good living as a romance novelist. “It may be a main source of income if the aspiring writer is driven enough to make a living out of it,” she said. “The amount of income solely depends on how fast and how sipag a writer is in churning out a manuscript.” For her—as it is for any writer—there are good days when she’s feeling productive and industrious, and there are bad days when sitting and staring off into space are the only things on the agenda. On good days she can finish a story in a week; on bad days, it can take up to a year or even years to complete. “If a writer cannot guarantee to finish his target quota of manuscripts for a given period of time, then it won’t be wise to leave one’s day job in favor of writing.” Joaquin’s personal record for most books written in one year is nine—nine manuscripts of about 22,000 words, 96 typewritten pages each book, which she accomplished in 2009-2010. Last year, she said, was “dismal” in terms of output, having “only” finished five. In the first five years of her writing career, she managed to have three manuscripts approved and
published. But even as the industry rewards hard work, local authors can also fall prey to the bane of artists everywhere: pirates. It’s unfortunately become a cottage industry in its own right. “We find ‘pirated’ copies of our novels printed with a different cover, different title and different author,” said Joaquin. “These get sold in local markets or on sidewalks for as cheap as PHP12 each for two books [per purchase].” Despite this, Tagalog Romance publishers are thriving. In 2011, Bookware published around 112 titles. On average, the company sells more than 5,000 copies per title. “My Special Valentine has a very steady popularity,” said Medina. “We’ve been here for 20 years and we’ve established a solid and profitable niche in the Tagalog Romance publishing industry. In terms of sales, Tagalog Romance novels are doing well. They’re one of the best-selling items in major bookstores here. [And] with the Internet and the online shops, social networking, we’ve even reached Filipino readers abroad.” With its following and its popularity, the pocket-sized passion of Tagalog romance novels are bringing in profits that are far from being considered small change.
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EMOTIONAL SIN Why infidelity is not just a matter of exchanging bodily fluids
The flirtation of a charged text message or smile, the harmless cup of coffee after work, the feeling of desire and being desired brought by an attraction to the opposite sex. Ana P. Santos talks to relationship and psychology experts to get the low down on emotional adultery, where betrayal does not necessitate taking off one’s clothes. “Office husband” is a term Aileen Santos hears quite often. Santos, a certified relationship coach with a master’s degree in Psychology and Counseling hears a lot of her patients talking about their “office husbands.” “This is the guy in the office that they hang out with, and with working hours being the way they are – long - this is also the guy they spend more time with compared to their real husbands.”
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Long office hours, alternating work days due to the proliferation of the BPO industry and more people spending more time at the office just to avoid mind numbing traffic are just some of the factors adding to the emergence of such relationships. “An office husband need not be an adulterous relationship and sometimes it is not,” said Santos, “but it does have the potential for turning into an emotional
affair. Women, by nature, are more prone to emotional affairs than physical ones.” The line that divides is so fine that it is easy to not even notice crossing it. “It’s when you start confiding in your office husband more than your real life partner that it starts to become an emotional affair,” Santos cautioned.
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By doing so, Santos says you deprive your partner the chance to get to know you, to share in the parts of your life that matter to you and be there for you. Santos, who says that relationships with the opposite sex are not to be totally avoided, stressed the difference. “When you tell someone about what happened or you need to bitch about what your boss said or did, that’s just recounting your day. But when you start talking about how this made you feel that’s different. The intimacy and insecurity in letting someone see your vulnerable side is the checkbox that makes it an emotional affair,” said Santos. “Relationships with other members of the opposite sex enrich us. Just as any other positive relationships do, but we need to be clear about what relationships are for what. We need to be clear about boundaries,” she added.
The Office Affair and the Office Lover When Jona, a 35-year-old sales executive, began moving up the corporate ladder faster than her husband who was her college sweetheart, she became more and more dissatisfied with the relationship. “It wasn’t just about me making more money. It was also about me being more ambitious than him. I began to see him as someone weak because he didn’t have the same drive. The power that I was feeling in the office, out on the field, was easy to bring home,” Jona explained. She began finding more and more excuses to work overtime with a colleague from another department. Their perceived similar interests attracted her to him even more. For the first time in their eight year marriage, Jona began wondering about
“The journey that we all want to be on, the one where we grow old with someone is a product of the small decisions we make every day. When we find ourselves veering off that course, we need to go back and think why we chose our partner in the first place.” what it would be like to sleep with another man.
and change, too,” said Santos in reaction to Jona’s case.
Eventually, a promotion and ambition saved the day for Jona. “The new role came with more responsibilities and in my desire to do well, I poured myself into the new job. Our problem then became the amount of time I was spending at work compared to being at home.”
Santos has seen many patients thinking that happy even after will just happen, which is a wrong notion. “The journey that we all want to be on, the one where we grow old with someone is a product of the small decisions we make every day. When we find ourselves veering off that course, we need to go back and think why we chose our partner in the first place.”
That was the problem on the outside. But Jona admitted that the bigger reason was that she didn’t find her husband interesting anymore. “He couldn’t relate to the decisions and the pressure of my position. I couldn’t talk to him anymore,” she said. “Relationships are dynamic. That’s their very nature. Because the people in it grow
Almost Lover or Too Close for Comfort For many people, there is a meaningful distinction between emotional infidelity and sexual infidelity.
28 FEATURE two of us - were abroad. Once, I answered his phone without saying hello right away and a female voice came on the line asking: ‘Hon, can you talk?’ What do you call that?” Rica wailed. With three kids and more than a decade of marriage, she says she doesn’t know what to do or why she continues to give him another chance. She can only conclude that the same thing that keeps her in the marriage is the same thing that angers her about Joggie’s “relationships” with these women. “He hasn’t had sex with any of these women and I know this for sure because we own and manage our own business. We know each other’s hours and schedules. It’s not even to keep tabs on each other, it’s just as a matter of operating the business,” Rica disclosed.
“In a close relationship, it’s not just the self that gets to call the shots and label things as ‘ok’ or `not ok’. The partner’s point of view is equally - some would argue, even more important, especially if you want to stay together and be happy.” “The former is about involving feelings, self-disclosure, opening up of the self to the other, becoming close, falling in love. The latter is more about sexual encounter.” said Eric Manalastas, Assistant Professor of Psychology at the University of the Philippines, Diliman.
does it mean that emotional infidelity will not bother straight men or that sexual infidelity will not worry straight women,” Manalastas explained.
Manalastas also shared that women often find emotional infidelity highly distressing, compared to sexual infidelity. On the other hand, men seem to be particularly bothered by women’s sexual infidelity.
Rica, 40, has been dealing with chronic infidelity and has gotten to know quite a bit about both sides of the coin. In their 12 years of marriage, she has found her husband, Joggie cheating four times. It was all the more infuriating for Rica when he would deny any physical involvement with the women.
“The gender difference should not be interpreted to mean there’s an absolute difference between men vs women. Nor
“I would see the text messages calling him “baby”, the messages saying thank you for the lingerie that he bought while we — the
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“I don’t know. To me, it is an affair because of the betrayal and the intense pain I feel with the discovery of each new dalliance. But is it really an affair? They’ve never consummated the relationship. It’s like my heart and my mind are telling me two different things!” Manalastas, in reaction says that what constitutes an affair is actually dependent on the couple. “If a couple constructs a committed relationship between themselves, and promises to be monogamous, then engaging in behaviors like texting, kissing, spending time with, or even thinking about someone else counts as infidelity not based on one’s own construal of “infidelity” but rather based on the partner’s.” “In a close relationship, it’s not just the self that gets to call the shots and label things as ‘ok’ or `not ok’. The partner’s point of view is equally - some would argue, even more important, especially if you want to stay together and be happy.”
In relationships, as in anything in life, the route to happy ever after is made up of small every day decisions.
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IF THE SKIRT FITS: Tales of Andres de Saya By Dante Gagelonia
We’ve all watched Philippine TV shows where the husband is at his wife’s beck and call, heard men who affectionately call their wives, “Kumander” and seen doting boyfriends/hubbys carry the teeny weeny handbags of their significant other. Doormat or chivalrous and yielding partner? Dante Gagelonia examines the why’s behind Andres de Saya. Illustrado Magazine
FEATURE 31 One of the most familiar caricatures of Filipino relationships is that of the subservient man, beholden to a domineering partner. Whether wife or girlfriend, this woman wields her authority over her man like a vengeful goddess, ordering her beleaguered partner about on countless errands. The henpecked man, hurriedly tries to keep up with her demands, manifesting a mixture of devotion and adulation that sometimes seems less like love, and more like fealty. He is occasionally portrayed as downtrodden and without hope, while other times, perfectly happy to be his beloved’s footstool. Television shows, movies, newspaper comics and the like have countless examples of that spectrum.
He didn’t regret the relationship, but he did learn a lot from it. He recognized that for some men, like him, it wasn’t that they wanted to be beholden to their partners: they just felt loved and important, so it seemed reasonable that they would bow to their partner’s wishes. Unfortunately, the end isn’t always pretty.
Amidst the humorous representation, there is solid basis. There really are many relationships that play out just like that, with permutations ranging from the pleasantly amusing to the unfortunately pitiful. The men in these relationships aren’t cut-and-dried, cardboard characters. There is complexity to be found in this dynamic: the hows and the whys of being henpecked are far more complex than the caricatures would suggest.
In It for Love “I was in a relationship like that once,” says Benji, 21, a video editor for a major television station. “I was still in high school. My girlfriend and I went to the same school, and we were happy to be in a relationship. I was still young at the time, so everything was cute and kilig. She was a bit spoiled, and she was used to getting her way. She would insist that we would do whatever she wanted, like seeing only movies she liked, me picking her up all the time. For a while, I liked it. I felt important. And I was raised to be a gentleman, so feeling ko, tama naman yung relationship namin.” However, things didn’t pan out in the long run: “We went to separate colleges. Doon, nagkaproblema na kami. She still wanted to do things the same way, but she was studying in Makati, and I was in Quezon City. Every day she would insist on seeing
me, and would make parinig about how I didn’t care about her if ever I missed an appointment. Emotional blackmail talaga. We would fight so often and eventually, I couldn’t take it anymore.” He didn’t regret the relationship, but he did learn a lot from it. He recognized that for some men, like him, it wasn’t that they wanted to be beholden to their partners: they just felt loved and important, so it seemed reasonable that they would bow to their partner’s wishes. Unfortunately, the end isn’t always pretty.
In it for an Easier Life Some men, on the other hand, take on submissive roles because things are just simpler that way. Belle, 27, an event planner for an advertising company, has a lot to say about that: “I was once with this
guy who really had no direction in his life. I was the dominant one in the sense that I did all the work. He was immature, and I was often more of his mommy/yaya than his girlfriend. I was literally deciding on everything: how we would spend the week, what we would eat for our meals, how we would spend our free time, everything. He didn’t like deciding. He’d just keep telling me, ‘ikaw bahala.’ And since we’d end up just doing nothing at all if I didn’t, I ended up doing that.” Being with a layabout boosted Belle’s ego for a while because she had a naturally strong personality, but eventually things came to a close. “Sure, I liked being in charge. I got to do what I wanted all the time, and was happy being sort of manipulative like that. He wised up towards the end, though, and I think that’s partly because I was trying
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There are relationship expectations present in Filipino culture, and these expectations provide the groundwork for being henpecked as much as it does for any other relationship dynamic.
to steer him towards a direction he didn’t want to go. Direction being, ‘grow the f--* up.’ We were together for eight years, can you imagine? I practically raised him.” Belle was forced to assume the dominant position in their relationship because he needed to have his hand held all the time. She didn’t feel a shallow desire to get whatever she wanted; in point of fact, often what she wanted was for him to get his own life together and figure out what he wanted in life aside from being her boyfriend.
In It for the Responsibility “I’m not happy,” explains Edward, 46, a client relations manager. “But I feel this is where I need to be. I have a responsibility to my wife, and my kids.” Edward has had a rocky marriage of 14 years. It hasn’t always been difficult, but the natural stresses of raising a family have taken their toll. “My wife’s not a monster, okay? We just don’t see eye to eye as often anymore, unlike when we were younger. Things change. But I love being a husband and a father. If being ‘under de saya’ is what I have to be to keep the peace, then I’ll do it.” Friends have pointed out to Edward that he should stand up for himself, and not just bow and take it when his wife starts throwing fits or demanding unreasonable things. However, he sees things differently:
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“What is unreasonable, anyway? She’s my wife, and I agreed to marry her. In sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, that sort of thing. I know that she wants what’s best for our family. Whenever we disagree, I just let her have her way. I have better things to do than break our family up over simple arguments.” Edward has noticed that this happens a lot in Filipino marriages. “I have friends that are also like this with their wives. It’s just less of a hassle to give them what they want. It may seem like an embarrassing thing, but it isn’t. We’re keeping our families intact. Is it really better for me to have my way, but then have an angry wife and unhappy kids for it?” He raises an excellent point: in a culture where strong deference to matriarchal authority walks hand-in-hand with typical patriarchal mores, who’s to say that being henpecked isn’t the most worthwhile way to go? Everyone wins, in Edwards’s framework. It may not be the happiest, by his own admission, but it’s a stable arrangement that he’s willing to live with.
A Factor of Culture Taking a broader, sociological perspective on the matter presents an interesting rationale for the Andres De Saya archetype. “In American pop culture, we often see men who feel emasculated,” explains Matthew,
31, editor of a men’s magazine. “Most of the time, they are depicted as being insecure in a world filled with extremely competent and independent women. In Philippine pop culture, we see men feel more than just insecure: we see them dominated by their spouses and significant others. Sometimes, it doesn’t matter if the henpecking woman is a capable breadwinner, professionally independent. It’s her sheer force of personality and the man’s fundamental desire to please her, and maybe even her family, that sustains his being ‘Andres De Saya.’” There are relationship expectations present in Filipino culture, and these expectations provide the groundwork for being henpecked as much as it does for any other relationship dynamic. Aspects of chivalry, respect for women as derived from maternal influence, and even elements of pamamanhikan and traditional courtship come into play. Subservient men aren’t necessarily weak; there are details involved in every relationship that could paint a different picture if seen a certain way. Before you summarily smirk or shake your head ruefully at the sight of another Andres de Saya, consider first why they’re in that situation. They may be much stronger, and more reasoned about their station life, than you think.
34 PINOY PRO Celebrating the Professional Pinoy ANTHONY LORENZO APOLINARIO Senior Project Manager Bond Interior Dubai
Architecture graduate Anthony Lorenzo Apolinario has always been in the business of building things. Before coming to UAE, he was working as an in-house architect for one of the leading developers in the Philippines. Now, in Dubai, he is a Senior Project Manager in Bond Interior, one of the top interior fitout and turnkey contractors in UAE. “I am also managing two of the stakeholders of the company thus taking a role of a Key Account Manager aside from my own projects.” Speaking as someone whose profession involves designing and building structures from scratch, Apolinario says that what is most fulfilling about is job is completing a project. “Our projects are our trophies while customers’ satisfaction is what keeps us going,” he said. “My greatest achievement is the completion of the Desert Islands Resort and Spa interior refurbishment. The hotel is considered as one of the most luxurious resorts located at Sir Bani Yas, Abu Dhabi,” Apolinario said, describing his latest trophy. When he is not tinkering with a new project or mulling over a building idea, you will find Apolinario on the basketball court or at the gym. “These activities are my outlet from stress at work. I see to it that I am well rested on Fridays.” Back in the Philippines are his children who serve as his motivation. “Here in Dubai, I am happy to have a partner who gives me strength and courage to aim high,” he concluded. ROMIANNE CARLA MICLAT QUION Administration Manager Huawei Technology Dubai
BS
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Management graduate from San Sebastian College Recoletos de Manila Romianne Carla Miclat Quion, says “I was once a very keen cheerleader in my college days and lived an active teenage life.” This young lady brought the same energy and sunny disposition with her, when she moved to Dubai shortly after graduation. From working as a staff at a popular beauty retail outlet in Dubai, as well as taking various office positions, Quion has grown and climbed the corporate ladder. She is now the Administration Manager at Huawei Technologies. “I am the head go-to girl on anything that involves administration. My typical day includes providing support to the director and GM. It involves a significant amount of paper work and visa processing, among other ad hoc tasks in the office. Name what you need, I can get it done — and in no time!” she quipped. Evidently one who enjoys rising to the occasion of each deadline thrown at her, Quion says of her job, “I’m given a chance to meet high caliber people of different industries. That alone is already rewarding in itself. It gives me a certain high knowing that one day, under normal circumstances I can be one of them.” “As a woman, I can say a great achievement is becoming a mother to a two year old girl, she is the best thing life has rewarded me. She is my driving force when I hit low points and just a smile from her would make all of life’s challenges worth it. She reminds me that I am in the best part of my life and that nothing can stop me in achieving more out of this life,” she said. Joan Yamson Liberato Architect Decoria Abu Dhabi
After graduating from Architecture school, Joan Yamson Liberato first worked in China as a Graphic Artist. Currently, she is an Architect in Decoria. Abu Dhabi, UAE.
“I usually do interior design, all the design concepts, layouting. I visit our project site and choose all the materials that are to be used. Everyday my mind bubbles with plans and ideas.” As someone who is involved in design, Liberato says that after convincing a client to take on their design proposals and the execution of their work, “It’s a great feeling to see a smile on their faces after the job is completed.” She says that this is one of the rewards of her job. But making her parents proud of what she has achieved easily trumps that. “We have very close family ties and I can say that I have the coolest family ever! HERBERT RIOS GALIZA Restaurant Manager Jawad Business Group Dubai
Having always worked in customer service, BS Computer Engineering graduate from the University of Baguio Herbert Rios Galiza first worked as a Customer Service Representative of Microsoft Xbox360 in NCO Philippines. Currently, he is combining customer service and food in his current post as restaurant manager. As a the manager of a busy restaurant outlet, Galizo manages day-to-day operations, while at the same time taking care of the Human Resources training and development. Galizo is also key in executing the restaurant’s marketing campaigns, as well as achieving the outlet’s profit objectives. “One of my achievements so far is being able to efficiently manage one of the busiest restaurants of JBG,” said Galiza. When not working, Galiza is into photography - a recently discovered passion. “I’ve been taking photos for some time now, yet only a few months ago I started thinking about simple stuff as subjects in photos,” he said.
36 PINOY TALENT-ON THE-JOB
It’s What I do It’s about Pinoy progress and diversity at the workplace
improve the knowledge and understanding of health and disease in birds particularly the falcon species, as well as supervise the health of falcons and of the different avian and mammalian species in the collection.
A typical day in the animal kingdom
JESUS L. NALDO, DVM Head of Veterinary Department Wrsan Wildlife Division Abu Dhabi The Wrsan Wildlife Division is a privately owned wildlife reserve. Some of the animal species present in the collection include falcons, ostriches, flamingoes, pheasants, Arabian oryx and gazelles, just to name a few. As head of the veterinary department, I ensure that all clinical and medical activities, protocols and procedures are performed to the highest standards and within a professional code of practice and ethical conduct. I also work on clinical research in collaboration with local, regional and international institutions intended to
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I start my work at 6:30am Saturday-Thursday with a staff meeting, then I’m off to my routine tasks checking on the animals confined in the hospital ward. I also check on the birds and the mammals in their respective quarters to ensure that their feeding, sanitation and production are according to our protocols. It is also part of my job to make an album of all wild birds present in the different farms owned by my sponsor so my camera is always in my car ready to shoot when there is an opportunity. I find this very fulfilling because not only that I am doing my job but at the same time I can do my hobby of photography. Since 1994 I have been writing research articles together with my colleagues. To date, we have published more than 80 papers in international veterinary journals and conference proceedings. But the highlight of my career is the publication of the book “Anatomical and Clinical Radiology of Birds of Prey” which I coauthored with my boss, Dr. Jaime Samour.
RX for success I guess my rules for success and happiness are a simple combination of work ethic, practicality and faith. Love your job. If you don’t like your present job, leave and look for another one. If you cannot leave, then learn to love it. When you receive your salary, save (pay yourself first) at least 20% then spend the rest. If you want to become wealthy, attend seminars on financial literacy and saving money the right way. Get health care protection for you and your family. Be faithful to your God. JIM
PAOLO JOQUICO
Founder and Editorial Director La Moda Dubai
I mainly look after the editorial aspect of the job which involves doing research on the latest industry news, identifying emerging trends, attending runway shows and collection presentations, developing stories of interest for our target audience.
PINOY TALENT-ON THE-JOB 37
Together with my team, we have successfully grown the brand into an authoritative source capable of informing and influencing readers, which range from the average luxury customer to key players within the regional fashion industry. Doing this job has allowed me to travel, meet people that you only read about in the magazines or whose names you only see on clothing labels, and speak to an audience as part of an expert panel.
From editor to social (media) butterfly A typical working day for me is a constant string of research and brainstorming sessions. I keep my eye on global industry news and trends, and identify potential features for our website. After our daily content is produced and published on the website, I switch jobs from editor to social media butterfly, because it’s my job to have a dialogue with our readers, too. Some days I also help coordinate fashion shoots. On top of all that, there’s the jam-packed calendar full of fashion events to get to. Last year, I was invited to speak as a resource person at a workshop called “How to Get into Fashion and Media” together with established professionals in their respective fields including media personality Simone Heng, OK! Middle East editor Sarah Bladen, and a few designers, boutique owners and stylists. As someone who has only been doing this job for about a year, I thought it was quite an achievement for me to have been included in such a distinguished panel. It was amazing that the organizers of the event thought my experiences could be something that the attendees could take home with them and learn from. It’s the icing on the cake that is my job, or maybe a “tiara” would be more appropriate.
CZARINA SORIANO Radio DJ – Rock Radio UAE 90.7FM Fujairah Media Group It might be a stretch but I think I may have the coolest job in the planet: playing Rock ‘n’ Roll four hours a day! I’m the mid-morning presenter on the newest and only rock station in the UAE. I’ve been on the air from 10am to 2pm every weekday since Rock Radio UAE’s was launched in November 2011. A fun, challenging workout for my brain cells is what it is. A good deal of our time is spent reading - from current events to the most random of things. Oh, we do actual work as well: running contests, scheduling music, producing interesting segments, keeping track of the music library, and managing Facebook. Seriously, a lot of our own brand of “work” happens when the on-air button is turned off.
Morning brew My day starts with the best cup of coffee in town; which can only be found in the offices of the Fujairah Media Group. My morning wouldn’t be complete without having a cup while answering and sending out e-mails, checking on current events,
and polishing my prep for the day. Four hours of standing starts at 10am when I enter the studios and do the show. Yes! We have a strict “No Chairs” rule inside the booth! We currently work with a small team and we each make sure that everything is set and ready a few days in advance. That means having a go at the music programming every day and liaising with each other to make sure that everything sounds tight and very Rock ‘n Roll on the air.
Unexpected chances I never thought I’d be a radio presenter outside of the Philippines. When my previous radio station signed off for good last year, I thought I was done with radio. I wasn’t open to working with any other format. I thought it was good fun while it lasted and was getting ready to don my nurse’s uniform and finally practice that profession. A few months after and still reluctant about working in a hospital, I got a call from my previous station manager asking me to send my voice clip to some guys who were looking for a Filipino rock jock. And though the process of me getting here took an arduous amount of waiting, I am now on my 5th month in the UAE and loving it! Sometimes all it takes is a single chance and the guts to see it through.
38 PINAY ENTREPRENEUR
MARIA LUISA ARANDA
Captain Potato Foodstuff LLC, Dubai, UAE Please describe your business. We are passionate about “All things Potato.” Captain Potato FoodStuff LLC is the owner/ supplier for the popular brand “Captain Potato - The Superb Flavored French Fries.” Our French Fries are known for mixed flavors such as BBQ, Cheddar Cheese, Sour Cream, Chili, and Mayo and Ketchup.
Can you tell us how you established your business? My family had their own business while I was growing up. Having grown in an entrepreneurial family, I guess it was natural that I will also have an inclination towards having my own business venture. When I arrived in Dubai and I started marketing related activities for the company I was working for, I felt the urge to once again have my own business and be my own boss one day. During one of my travels to Manila, I started looking for potential business I could possibly bring into Dubai. A brisk potato business where customers line up to buy these flavored French Fries caught my attention. I thought it would be a hit in the emirate. I started Captain Potato FoodStuff LLC in October 2009 at the peak of the recession and global financial crisis and we’ve been operating since.
What was your start-up capital and your basic operations setup? My start-up capital was AED 150,000. I opened two kiosks - one in AlMaya Supermarket in Satwa and one in Grand Mart Hypermarket in Deira. Since the concept came from the Philippines, I decided to target key areas of Dubai where there are a lot of Filipinos to make brand recognition for
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Captain Potato easier and the introduction of marketing initiatives smoother.
What obstacles did you encounter in your business? In the first year of my business, the economy was already in the midst of the crisis. Most consumers were very conservative in spending their hard-earned cash. We didn’t achieve the expected revenue that I had projected. I ended up paying from my own pocket just to sustain the operational need of keeping the business afloat. We were also left shortstaffed. I had to hire new employees and it was cash out again. That slowed down our business since I had to re-train and all. It was a very difficult time. The commercial rental fees in Dubai were also still high that time, which made me consider another business strategy. I relocated and opened a branch license in Fujairah. I saw an opportunity there because of its low commercial rent, and low overhead. With the sales from the Fujairah business, I managed to sustain the business and come back to Dubai again.
What are the landmarks in your business so far? In the two years that we have been in operation, we have captured a huge and moneyed-captive market (middle income and above), we have increased our brand recognition in the market especially in local residence areas. We have five outlets now all in all: Dubai Festival City, Uptown Mirdiff, Etihad Mall, Princess Haya’s Family Gathering, and Jungle Bungle in Fujairah Tower. Occasionally, we participate in various events; we also do corporate and school catering. Our products and brands are also available in some amusement centers like
Dubai International Bowling Center and will be available very soon in Creek Park Dolphinarium. We are now in the process of polishing our franchise system as we plan on selling this business model to neighboring emirates and other GCC countries.
What are the advantages and disadvantages of being an entrepreneur? From all of this, I have learned that having your own business is like raising a child. No one will take as much interest and pride in it as much as you will. When I get compliments - whether it is about the great taste of our imported flavors from Philippines, the staff or the service - I beam with pride. I love, love, love hearing how people enjoy eating my Captain Potato. I get so much joy, inspiration and drive to keep doing this business. As an entrepreneur, you are holding multiple hats, you’re the Operations, Finance, Logistics, Marketing, Human Resource and Administration Manager all rolled into one. Each hat requires your attention, patience and dedication. This means that time management is essential but it all becomes worth it at the end of the day when you see that your little business venture is thriving and blossoming. Being you own boss is another wonderful benefit, as long as you are responsible. I’ve been my own boss for so long now; I actually cringe at the thought of having someone tell me what to do. Of course, being your own boss also means that all decisions, good and bad, fall on your shoulders.
Would you encourage other Filipinos to go into business? What is your advice to budding Pinoy entrepreneurs? For anyone who wants to have their own business, they need to get as much help and advice as possible. Getting funding for your business venture is going to be high on your to do list. You must be strong enough to lead the way and let your own interest and love for whatever it is you want to do, guide you. Loving what you do miraculously attracts all the necessary resources, people and opportunities.
40 KABUHAYAN-ENTREPRENEURSHIP
MedChef By Bernadette Reyes
If it weren’t for the mouth-watering desserts displayed on the chiller, anyone would have mistaken Med Chef for a clinic with its obsessively clear white walls and interiors.
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KABUHAYAN-ENTREPRENEURSHIP 41 Located in Diliman, Quezon City, MedChef got its name from business partners, Jayson Carlos, a medical technician and Hasset Go, a pastry chef.
Since all the products are homemade up to present, the cakes and pastries are 100 percent free of preservatives, additives and emulsifiers.
Chef Hasset used to run a home-based pastry business. Church mates were some of his regular customers, among them was Jayson. He would place bulk orders and resell the pastries in the hospital where he works.
The clientele grew from regular customers who live and work nearby to dessert lovers who would travel all the way from provinces for a dose of sugar. “We have customers who come all the way from Pampanga, Laguna, Olongapo and even Baguio!” said Chef Hasset.
One day, a coffee shop across the hospital was looking for a supplier of pastries. Chef Hasset heard the buzz from Jayson. He asked the coffee shop owner to sample his desserts and was later chosen out of seven other potential suppliers.
The popularity of MedChef desserts is soon going to be beyond Luzon. Soon the sweet experience will spread in Cebu, Palawan and Cagayan de Oro where the business is poised to expand.
The baking equipment he had in his small apartment couldn’t quite keep up with the demand so he gave a partnership proposal to Jayson, who then infused much-needed additional working capital. Later, they joined bazaars and catered to corporate events until they were able to set up MedChef.
To cater to the health conscious market, MedChef also offers sugar-free desserts by using coconut sugar from Surigao. “Other shops use artificial sugar substitute but coconut sugar is 100% organic and cultivated and produced by our local farmers. One of my advocacies is to help local farmers and promote local products,” said Chef Hasset.
Med Chef became even more popular with the help of regular TV guestings. Chef Hasset would also offer career talks in colleges and universities and cooking demonstrations in malls and private corporations upon request. Jayson and Chef Hasset invested approximately PHP800,000 to open the shop in 2010. In less than two years, they were able to pay all their debts and are now reaping profit. While MedChef currently enjoys its sweet success, its business owners continue to spends a lot of time in the business to ensure it is being managed properly. “You must be hands-on the business. Do not expect your employees to run the business. You can also ask your family members to help out,” said Chef Hasset.
Aside from his five years of professional experience as a pastry chef in various restaurants, Chef Hasset comes from a family of great cooks. “My cousins and one of my aunties are all great cooks, but I learned how to bake from my mom back when I was 8 years old,” Chef Hasset said. His love of baking and obsession with sweets were just the right ingredients to bake signature desserts for MedChef such as the Love Me Tender Cake, Bread Pudding Crème Brulee, Pastry Tower and the Ube-Jackfruit Cake, which turned out to be instant favorites.
success. MedChef is located in the middle of a busy commercial area interspersed with residential houses where his regular customers come from. Neither does the business have competing pastry shops nearby.
The products are excellent in quality and also very affordable. Depending on the variety, a slice of cake would cost PHP60 while a chunk of the assorted dessert bars is sold at PHP40 each. “Since our price range varies, our customers also range from class A to E. Even if our price is cheap, the quality never suffers. What we had from day 1 is the same taste, same ingredients and same quality,” said Chef Hasset. “My creations are very simple yet elegant and the shop while small, is very nice and relaxing,” Chef Hasset added. The excellent product is crucial but the right location, said Chef Hasset, is key to
A feasibility study is also necessary in any start-up business. You must know how much the business would require and determine its profitability. “Spend your money wisely. Come up with a list of priorities – which are top priorities which are not. This way you are able to spend for what is essential, then buy other things as you make money,” he said. Chef Hasset said that while cakes and pastries are easy to make for those who can follow instructions, this type of business requires more than skills. He believes knowledge is a primary ingredient in any business but it must be seasoned with love so it doesn’t end up half-baked. “Since baking is my passion, I am able to make promising and really unique pastries. I love what I do. If you want to start a business, follow your heart. What is important is that you enjoy what you are doing,” he said.
42 KABUHAYAN-MONEY
Looking for a RICH HUSBAND By Francisco J Colayco
The year 2012 is a leap year and there is a joke that ladies have one extra day to be able to find a husband. I came across this post from a young and pretty lady posting on a popular email forum about her desire to find a husband.
This is part of what she said: I’m going to be honest of what I’m going to say here. I’m 25 this year. I’m very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a very rich guy. You might say that I’m greedy, but I don’t think so, considering that there are many others who have higher salaries. Is there anyone in this forum who is very rich? Are you all married? I wanted to ask: What should I do to marry a rich guy like you?
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I’m here humbly to ask a few questions: Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurants, and gyms.) Which age group should I target? Why are most of the wives of the rich only average-looking? I’ve met a few girls who don’t have good looks and are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich guys. How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your girlfriend? My target now is to get married.
~Ms. Pretty
KABUHAYAN-MONEY 43
Whatever the case, financial education is a must. Teach your daughters, girlfriends and other women in your life to educate themselves. It will be good investment for everyone. Here’s the awesome reply from a professional investor: Dear Ms. Pretty, I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyze your situation as a professional investor. I am very rich, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I’m not wasting time here. From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain. Put the details aside, what you’re trying to do is propose an exchange of “beauty” and “money” - Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square. However, there’s a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can’t be prettier year after year. Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It’s not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much less 10 years later.
By the terms we use in the stock market, every trading has a position, dating you is also a “trading position.” If the trade value drops, we will sell it. It is not a good idea to keep it for long term - same goes with the marriage that you want. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wise decision about any asset with great depreciation value will involve either selling it or leasing it. Anyone who is very rich is not a fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advise that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. And by the way, you could make yourself out to become a rich person. This has a better chance than finding a rich fool.” Here are my further comments and clarification to his correct and hilarious reply. Sad to say, the pretty lady in this example is not really a person with good values. Therefore, she is not really ideal material for a good wife. Seriously, you must always look for a person with the right values when choosing your wife or husband. Notice that a rich person will always be rich if he manages his wealth properly. However, there are also rich people who
lose all their money because they are not very bright. In fact, a rich person is not very bright if he marries a pretty girl who is only out for his money. He could precisely lose all his money because of his expensive pretty wife. The advice to the pretty lady to make herself a rich person instead of looking for a rich person to marry is very solid. And it is easy for a pretty lady to educate herself into making the right investments. All the more, wealth is clearly within her reach because so many will be more than willing to help her. Unfortunately, most are either lazy to learn and work to become rich, or perhaps, because they have not taken steps to become financially literate, are easily fooled. A rich, pretty and financially educated lady is a great catch for any man! Whatever the case, financial education is a must. Teach your daughters, girlfriends and other women in your life to educate themselves. It will be good investment for everyone. Teaching your sons, boyfriends and other men in your life the same skills won’t hurt either.
44 ADVERTORIAL
Diamonds are a girl’s best friend – It’s official The Bride Show’s Annual 2012 Survey ranked diamonds as the UAE’s most popular engagement jewel. “Diamonds Are A Girl’s Best Friend’ – this saying was made popular by one of Hollywood’s original divas, Marilyn Monroe, and diamonds have kept their classic allure as the most desirable jewel in the world, and the epitome of romance to this day. Last month, the old adage has proven itself once again due to the findings of The Bride Show’s Annual Bridal Survey. Based on responses from over 750 brides and brides to be in the UAE, the survey, commissioned by the team at the Middle East’s leading bridal event, asked individuals to name their preferred stone for engagement rings. Diamonds received a huge 86% of the votes, with sapphires and rubies each receiving 5% of the vote, and emeralds 4%. Of those selecting diamonds, 91% stated that they preferred a classic white diamond as opposed to chocolate, yellow or pink variants. The results show that despite all the progress made to date, diamonds have kept their classic allure as the most desirable jewel in the world, and the epitome of romance. The Bride Show Abu Dhabi celebrated all things jewelry at the exhibition in February, with a strong selection of brands that comprised of designers from the GCC and Europe. Highlights included participation from Yessayan Jewellery and Wazni Jewellery from Lebanon, who were taking part for the first time, Azar and Christian Or from Lebanon, Zela from Turkey and international brands Bellina
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Collection International, FR Hueb and Scintilla Monaco.
adjusted for scenes where a slight manual adjustment may bring a better result.
The Bride Show Dubai will follow the success of the Bride Show Abu Dhabi and takes place at the Dubai International Exhibition Centre 4 – 7 April 2012, featuring a number of high profile companies such as Jewels by Queenie, as well as Solitaire, Azar Gems and Ahmad Kurdi.
LUMIX G Micro System cameras also records not only high quality photo, but also stunning video. The AVCHD format features almost twice the recording time in HD quality than the conventional Motion JPEG. In addition to the practical fulltime AF, the Touch AF in video recording also lets users enjoy professional-like rack focusing. Just by pointing the subject, the focus is shifted to it and let it stand out to attract attention.
The 2012 event marks the 15th anniversary of the Show, and will be celebrated with a number of new high-end features including a ‘Fashion Avenue’ and VIP Lounge as well as the return of the successful Young Designer Awards. The Bride Show Dubai is proud to be supported by a number of high profile sponsors including Zadina as Silver Sponsor, Ponds as Silver Sponsor and Lily Pond (Soothe Group) as VIP Lounge Sponsor.
PanasonicLumixG Series Developed by Panasonic in cooperation with leading photographic engineers, the G3 and the GF3 gives users the opportunity to explore the creativity aspect of taking photographs. The cameras come with a full-time Live View for setting up the perfect shot and the unique iA mode helps in capturing stunning photos. Capturing pictures with the iA mode will satisfy experienced photographers, yet is easy enough for beginners to use comfortably in both photo and video recording. In the iA Mode, defocusing area, exposure and white balance can be
UAE Exchange New Year Fest Finale The grand finale of UAE Exchange New Year Fest saw Mr. Ghazanfar Hussain S/o Muhammad Sharif of Dubai winning a Nissan Xterra in the Mega Draw. Mr. Muhammed Shahzad Muhammed Gulzar drove home a Nissan Sunny in the 2nd Monthly Draw, while 25 customers won their transaction amount back up to 10,000 each in the fourth fortnightly draw. The draw was conducted in the UAE Head Office of UAE Exchange in Dubai on the 6th February, 2012. Mr. Rajanikanth Gazzala Gangaram had won a Nissan Sunny in the 1st Monthly Draw conducted in December, 2011, which makes it a total of two cars in two monthly draws. In four fortnightly draws, 100 lucky customers got a total of 1,000,000 in cash, when they won their transaction amount back up to 10,000 each. Mr. Y. Sudhir Kumar Shetty, COO – Global Operations, UAE Exchange, stated “We are extremely thankful to customers for making our first promotion of the New Year, 2012, a grand success. This is just the beginning of a line-up of promotions, awaiting our customers this year. Various draws in the promotion ensure that more customers get an opportunity to win exciting prizes, which are our tokens of gratitude for their trust in our services,” he added.
46 RELATIONSHIPS
HEAD IN A NOOSE
Dear Dr. Holmes and Mr. Baer, I’m a single mom. I had a boyfriend 10 years ago named Jim. We both come from good families. At that time, we were not that serious.
I said, “There’s nothing to worry about. I will not run after you or make your life miserable.” Though I was scared.
One day I call his office and found out he was getting married. I said to myself, “Ok lang. There are many other men. Maybe we’re not meant for each other.”
Again, we separated as if nothing happened. I didn’t know when he left, but later, I got pregnant and gave birth to a boy. My life carried on as before. He was no longer in my thoughts and he was no longer in my mind.
So I carried on with my life. We spoke through chat for two years, without talking about anything serious. It was as if nothing happened. No explanation on his part. But I knew he was married.
Unfortunately, my friend and I planned a vacation in his province so I remembered him. I called his Manila office and was told he was in the Philippines. I called. He was surprised I was in his province.
In 2008, he came home. We met and something happened. He asked, “What if you get pregnant?”
I told him: “I’m just letting you know that we have a child. I’m not asking for financial support. If you want to make sure, you can have a DNA test.”
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He and his wife are childless. I showed him pictures of my son, but told him you will see him only when the right time comes - at the age when he starts looking for his Daddy. I don’t want my son to get hurt. I also told him, “I don’t know if we can see each other because of your situation. I don’t want to mess up our lives.” I feel that he cannot bear to hurt his wife. I also don’t want his wife to get hurt since we are both women. I’m beginning to fall in love again because we talk almost every day. It’s really painful, knowing he can bear not to see me and my son. I know he will not run after us. He has shown me his true feelings. Caroline
RELATIONSHIPS 47 Caroline, I have not come across anyone that has so knowingly put her own neck in a noose. You seem to have gone on to tighten the knot and begun the strangulation process as well. What are we to make of your behavior? It seems as though you have some sort of death wish. When nothing came of your initial relationship with Jim, which you assure us was not serious, and when you then found out that he had married someone else and emigrated, you deliberately kept the relationship alive by maintaining contact with him. When he returned home - still married you first slept with him and then decided to put him out of your mind, but you found you were pregnant and had his baby. Then, you “unfortunately” decided to go on vacation to his province. Not only did you contact him, but you remained so much in touch that you are “beginning to fall in love again”. Visiting Jim’s province was not unfortunate but deliberate, giving you the pretense Dear Caroline, I concur with Mr. Baer’s analysis, except I probably would’ve said it a bit more gently. However, given your penchant for interpreting everything to your benefit despite reality being the exact opposite, his style was, perhaps, the only way to get our message across. And even now we’re not so sure it has. To paraphrase Bon Jovi’s “You Give Love a Bad Name,” you give mistresses a bad name, which is a pity because not all mistresses are like you. Many of them are good, kind and selfless. In fact, many of them are unaware that the men who courted them and profess undying love and devotion have professed the same thing to another woman before. In fact, men have it timed so that the woman only knows after she has fallen
of an excuse to tell him about the child and renew your relationship. To prevent Jim from seeing his son however seems downright perverse if your long-term aim is genuinely to interest Jim in his son’s future well-being. After all, you seem to think that your son needs a father - but apparently not quite yet. About your claim not to want to hurt Jim’s wife, you failed abysmally. You have kept in touch with her husband without her knowledge, slept with him, had his child, told him about the child and persisted in the relationship up to now. This is the behavior of an enemy, not a sister-in-arms. All in all, your behavior to date has been positively Jekyll and Hyde. As Mrs. Jekyll, you have expressed the best of intentions while as Mrs. Hyde you have acted in completely the opposite way. Either you have no appreciation of the reality of your situation or you are determined to be seen as the ‘wronged woman’ You are now at a crossroads and have to decide what to do, for yourself and for your son.
For yourself, you must decide whether to continue your relationship with Jim despite the obstacles of a) his marriage and b) his apparent lack of interest in setting up home with you. From your letter, it seems that the most you can expect from Jim is telephone conversations and the occasional meeting. This does not sound like the basis for a deep and meaningful relationship and so I would suggest that you try to move on, but you have to be the judge of that. As for your son, he will at some moment begin expressing an interest in his father and it would be sensible to prepare yourself for that. This requires deciding what role, Jim should play in your son’s future. Unless you decide to keep Jim’s identity a secret from your son, this will require discussion of the options with Jim since his agreement will be needed if he is to play an active role and based on his apparent lack of interest in his son, that cannot be taken for granted. In summary, some difficult and challenging choices lie ahead. Wishing you the best of luck. JAF Baer
in love with him and possibly had his baby. Given our cultural mores and the Madonna-Prostitute Dichotomy so common in the Philippines, you have given more reason for others to judge all mistresses harshly. By your actions and rationalizations, you have helped unthinking people generalize all mistresses as greedy, grasping women thinking only of themselves, getting pregnant merely to trap their married lover to remain bound to them, feeling no compunction in using their children together as pawns in their machinations. Despite your protestations, you seem to take a gleeful delight na naisahan mo ang misis niya (you have one over her since you have a baby with him whereas she probably cannot.) Give it up, Caroline. He is patently uninterested in having a relationship with
you. Of course, he won’t look a gift horse in the mouth but accept that you can never have a mature relationship if only you are doing all the running. He has chosen not to be your lover. But he can still be a wonderful father to your son, especially if this is something he can eventually share with his wife. If you love your son as you claim to, you will allow a relationship to flourish between the two of them. In time, you may even find another person to be the partner you hoped Jim would be. Maybe so, maybe not, but isn’t it a wonderful feeling to know you are finally living up to your potential as an independent woman, able to love and give with no lies to distract you and no strings attached ? Good luck! MG Holmes
48 SPIRITUALITY
I STILL DATE MY EX-GIRLFRIEND Call Me Crazy, but She Still Makes My Heart Go Pumpity-Pump By Bo Sanchez
I wrote this article three years ago, on the tenth year of my marriage. At the time, the first eight paragraphs read this way:
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SPIRITUALITY 49 After ten years of marriage, I’m still crazy about this woman. Being with her is my little piece of heaven on earth. Here’s my proof: So far, I’ve had 508 romantic dates with my wife. (Yes, my wife. What were you thinking? She’s my ex-girlfriend, right?) That’s once per week for almost 10 beautiful years. And I’ve loved every single one of them. Our date night is sacred. Unless it’s an invitation from the President of the Republic, I say no to all invitations and meetings. Our marriage is what it is today because of those precious 508 dates. Call me corny. Call me deluded. Call me in denial. But I really love being with her.
Now, January 15, 2012 (my deadline for this article), let me re-write those paragraphs: After 13 years, six months, and two weeks of marriage, I’m still crazy about this woman. Being with her is my little piece of heaven on earth. Here’s my proof: So far, I’ve had 690 romantic dates with my wife. (Yes, my wife. What were you thinking? She’s my ex-girlfriend, right?) That’s once per week for almost 10 beautiful years. And I’ve loved every single one of them. Our date night is sacred. Unless it’s an invitation from the President of the Republic, I say no to all invitations and meetings. Our marriage is what it is today because of those precious 690 dates. Call me corny. Call me deluded. Call me in denial. But I really love being with her.
Yup, that’s right. The words are still correct. Only the numbers have changed. Why? Read on… Did you know my wife has magical powers? When I’m with her, she drains my stress away. When I’m going through a rough time, all I have to do is share my problems with her, and instantly, I feel so much better. With her, I’m at home. And I rest. I believe couples need to connect with each other in a deep way, or they will drift apart and look for attachments elsewhere. Aside from our weekly dates, I grab special times I call “spontaneous moments of connection.”
Spontaneous Moments of Connection One afternoon, I came home ready to dive into my work. The usual stuff I do: articles to write, talks to prepare, meetings to plan… But when I came home, I saw this lovely woman sitting on the couch all by herself. I thought to myself, “Work can wait,” and I grabbed this opportunity to sit beside the greatest girl on the galaxy. It wasn’t planned. But we were able to talk and connect with our hearts. Even just for a few minutes. Life offers us these fantastic times of bonding. I’ve learned not to miss them: Being stuck in traffic with her. Or waiting for the dentist. Or lining up in the grocery. These times don’t have to be boring if you hold hands and talk.
How to Have a Great Marriage One day, a young husband came up to me and said, “Bo, I wish my marriage will be as great as yours ten years from now…” I only had one thing to say to him: “Don’t wish. Decide.” In that one line, I gave my secret to success. That’s what separates great marriages and not-so-great marriages. That’s what separates successful people from unsuccessful people. Unsuccessful people wish, want, hope, desire for their dreams. That’s not enough. Successful people decide to make their dreams happen. Period. That means they’ll do whatever it takes. Nothing will stop them. Failure is not an option. Let me ask you: Will you do whatever it takes? For me as a husband, it means… • Practicing “mental” monogamy • Overlooking her faults • Going out of my way to express my love • Putting our dates on my top priority • Leading my family to God Just in case you’re in the delusion that I’m a perfect husband, let me make this record straight. I’m far from it. Just ask my wife!
But the important thing is that I’ve decided to become a great husband. And I make that decision every day. (I struggle towards this dream every day!) I’ve realized that this power of decision works in every other area in life…
How to Be a Success in Anything I’ve also decided to be a financial success. No ifs, no buts, no excuses. I’ll do everything it takes. For me, that means sticking to my core gifts, getting wise mentors, reinventing myself, creating a dream team around me, and focusing on loving my customers. I’ve also decided to be a spiritual person. That means opening myself to God’s love, walking with integrity, and pursuing my ultimate mission of loving others. I’ve also decided to be a healthy person. That means going to the gym daily, eating veggies and fruits, taking supplements, and living with balance.
Don’t Wish. Decide. “But Bo, I’ve already decided to be a success! But I guess my decision wasn’t strong enough…” Then that means you haven’t really decided yet. You’ve just wished. If you remain in the level of wish, nothing happens. You must go to the level of decision. I’m reminded of this Chinese General who invaded an island. Upon landing on the shore, he asked his soldiers to burn their own boats. Obviously, they were shocked. When asked why would they do this insane act of burning their own boats, he said,“We’ll leave this island either as victors or as dead men. Escape is not an option.” That’s a decision. And that’s the kind of decision that will make you succeed in anything. Happy Love Month!
50 STYLE AND IMAGE
Color and
YOU
By Agnes Aquino-Briggs
Color is the core foundation of looking good and is a wonderful tool to make a statement. Are you wearing your best flattering colors every day or are you stuck with your uniform of the same safe color you’ve been wearing over the years? When was the last time you received a compliment about the way you look, wearing a certain color? Compliments make you feel attractive desirable and ultimately raise your sense of confidence. So why would you wear anything other than the colors that suit you best?
Your best color Color, whether from the clothes and makeup you wear, or even from the shade or highlights on your hair, affect your look in a major way. The colors you choose should always be in harmony and in balance with your hair, skin and eyes, as well as match
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the intensity of your personality.
Not your right shade
You will know that you are wearing the right color if it makes your skin appear even toned, smoother, fresher and younger; your teeth appears whiter with a brighter smile; your eyes appear brighter and alert and the highlights in your hair enhances your look. With the right shades, you look healthier and radiant. Laughter lines and imperfections are also minimized, and your apparent size and body shape are balanced.
If a certain color does not match you, the results are quite obvious. Wearing shades that are incorrect make your skin tone look uneven, and your wrinkles and imperfections, more visible. You look tired, dull and older than your age. At times, the wrong colors also cause shadowing that may highlight under-eye circles or create the false impression of a double chin. Furthermore, your teeth can also appear with slightly yellowish.
Your best color will always reflect your personality and sense of style and fashion.
Colors that do not match you will always stand out more than you.
STYLE AND IMAGE 51
Color Analysis Color Analysis is the science and art of identifying your best colors through skin tone color matching. It is not merely a fad, but something that is very useful when it comes to developing your personal sense of style. There is a lot of information published in books and online about color analysis – mostly evolving from the traditional seasonal color analysis which classifies individuals in four color types: winter, summer, spring and autumn, to a flow seasonal analysis with twelve categories to be a little more specific.
category, or season. A person’s skin may have a strong or weak blue undertone, or it may have a strong or weak yellow undertone.” Unfortunately, existing resources usually feature Caucasians models or those with extremely dark olive skin and hardly anything in between. So it is not easy to use these studies alone, when analysing Asian coloring. The best way of having your color analysis done is through the personalized service of a Style Consultant who has a trained eye to guide and convince you with the
Wikipedia gives us a brief idea on some important considerations in analyzing color – “Everybody’s skin color includes strong elements of red (based on the color of the haemoglobin in his or her blood, which is visible, to some degree, through the translucent skin). Color analysts agree that this is the case for persons of all races, and for all varieties of skin color. The undertone, which will be either blue or yellow, determines the person’s color
Warm color palette
supporting scientific explanation why one looks in harmony with say warm or cool colors. But if you don’t have the benefit of such services, here’s a simple guide.
Analyzing Asian Skin First, establish the color temperature – whether you are warm or cool. Warm colors are traditionally orange, yellows red, while cool colors are blue green and violet. More specifically, a person who is warm has skin that is very dark brown, medium brown, brown or pale peach, all with
52 STYLE AND IMAGE
knowing it. Ladies take note that: Yellow – turns their heads to you and holds it there. Yellow, keeps them alert; something new can start. Yellow-based reds – keeps the conversation alive True reds – men are attracted to women who are confident. Red exhibits confidence the most.
Cool color palette golden undertones. Colors choices should be focused on earth tones (yellows, oranges, browns, yellowish greens and orange-based reds).
Leave those flat and serious colors for business occasions, when you are planning active sports or an active day. Instead, wear energetic colors such as red and orange.
A warm person always looks better in ivory than pure white. Hence, foundation should be yellow-based. Black is not such a flattering color, especially worn close to the face as this makes the individual look washed out.
Brighten up and wear sunshine, if a rainy day is bringing you down, tangerine or yellow will lift spirits and keep you bright in the gray of the day.
On the other hand, a cool person looks better, pink-based foundation, and pure white rather than ivory. The preferred colors includes jewel tones - blues, greens, pinks, purples, blue-greens, magentas, and blue-based reds. A cool person has skin ranging from very dark brown with reddish or blue undertones, brown with pink undertones, olive (most Asians and Latinos), or medium with faint color in the cheeks, to pale with no color in cheeks, or pale with pink undertones, or ruddy-pinkish red.
Expressing yourself with colors Turned heads and be noticed. The evening can be yours in a little black dress. Look confident, professional and polished with a charcoal gray suit for an interview, establishing your credibility as soon as you enter the room.
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Planning a romantic pursuit? Pursue in dark red. Planning to be pursued? Baby Pink or ivory then. Still afraid of colors? Consider a professional color analysis consultation. Understanding how to determine your best colors is one of the best investments a woman can make. It is for a lifetime and priceless, and not as expensive as the latest Louis Vuitton or even a Michael Korrs bag.
Say it with Colors It has been ascertained by medical science that color can influence the viewer’s hormones. So when choosing colors, be aware of what impact they will have when you are trying to meet the partner of your dreams. Much has written about men but men don’t know much about colors and how it affects them. Men respond to colors well professionally and socially without them
Burgundy – is the royal color and reflects class and sophistication, while attracting the same type of men. Mid-range blues – some men are shy in the beginning. This color puts them at ease and allows interactions to go smoothly. Sky blue – calm and tame the man of your dreams with this color. Navy blue – just like business, blue means serious. If you want to be taken seriously, wear navy blue. It inspires others to trust your judgement and listen to what you have to say. Blue-based reds – Men are attracted to women who has a mind of her own and not a clinging vine. Blue based reds suggests intelligence but still feminine. Red violet – Women hold the family together. This color suggests strength and creativity. A woman who is strong and creative can weather the times. Strong men attracted to strong women. Colors when used in fabrics produce different reactions. A red blazer worn with a white shirt to a business meeting exhibits confidence and power but a red blazer worn with a lacy black top will send the wrong message and can be interpreted as saying, ‘I’m sexy and adventurous, come an explore me after the meeting. ‘’
54 ILLUSTRADO SCRAPBOOK A platform for budding Filipino creative talent
CZARRO ANN INFANTE-DE GUZMAN Czarro Ann Infante-de Guzman was working as an Architect in an architectural and structural firm (Al Falasi & Partners Architects and Engineers) in Dubai, before deciding to become a full time mom to her daughter, Jaelen. “Being a plain housewife is hard yet fulfilling. Sometimes I manage to do freelance architectural work at home,” shared Infante-de Guzman. Infante-de Guzman, who says her sense of aesthetics was largely influenced by her father, started photography in 2010 without attending any formal photography course or workshop. She shares, “My father is an artist. He is the one who influenced and trained me, encouraging me to compete in several drawing contests in our province. Now, my camera is my tool for expressing my love and passion for art.”
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A platform for budding Filipino creative talent
ILLUSTRADO SCRAPBOOK 55
MAYNARD DELA CRUZ Maynard Dela Cruz is a freelance photographer based in Abu Dhabi. Curently, he is the Public Relations Officer of Shootercada Photographer’s Circle, a group of Filipino photography enthusiasts.
Dela Cruz says his interest in photography started when he bought his first DSLR. “The sound of a clicking shutter was like a song being sung in my ear,” said Dela Cruz.
While Dela Cruz does mostly portraits, landscape, wedding and fashion, he has slowly begun to expand his repertoire. “Until now I’m learning because the world of photography is so vast,” said Dela Cruz.
56 FASHION PHOTOGRAPHER: ENZO MONDEJAR STYLIST: ERIC POLIQUIT HAIR AND MAKE-UP STYLIST: MAURI ESTRADA MODEL: CRISTAL MENDOZA AT YEOH MODELS ASSISTANT PHOTOGRAPHER: APPLE MARIE VILLALOBOS ASSISTANT STYLIST: MARK TUNAY Shot on location at the Calatagan Mangrove Conservation Park, Calatagan, Batangas
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FASHION 57 Crimson hand-painted silk gown by Edwin Tan
Engage in a feral affair with nature. Bask in the languid colors of the earth while tempering the rush of fierce textural details in animal prints, ethnic and floral patterns. Softly yield to the primal call of this season’s
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58 FASHION Leopard print maxi dress from Details; Malena and Sangre del Mar Necklace by Bosquejo; necklace used as belt (stylist’s own)
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FASHION 59
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60 FASHION
Paisley blouse by Robin Tomas for MYTH
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FASHION 61
Floral chiffon tent dress with denim collar matched with checks and French lace, topped by a headpiece, all by Gerry Katigbak
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62 FASHION
FASHION 63 Wooden necklace by Gakuya; snake print palazzo by Details; native hat from Ilocos and woven sling bag from Baguio (stylist’s own)
64 FASHION Tribal knit pullover and trousers by Proud Race for MYTH; bonnet and wooden bangles (stylist’s own)
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FASHION 65
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66 FASHION
STOCKISTS: GERYY KATIGBAK FDCP 254 Menlo corner Donada Street, Pasay City, Philippines By appointment: 63 918 941 7189 Email: gerrykat_3@yahoo.com DETAILS 2nd Floor Rockwell Power Plant Mall, Makati City, Philippines GAKUYA (House of Fashion) by Kim Gan Corinthian Gardens Clubhouse Ortigas Avenue, EDSA, Philippines Telefax: 63 2 632 1311 EDWIN TAN 71 Araullo Street corner Hoover Street, San Juan City, Philippines 63 2 726 7521 Email: designer_edwintan@yahoo.com BOSQUEJO www.bosquejobazaar.com MYTH 2nd Level Greenbelt 5, Ayala Center, Makati City, Philippines Telefax: 63 2 757 0162
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Flowing Bohemian skirt by Gakuya; Martina and Cascabel necklace by Bosquejo
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68 ILLUSTRADO RUNWAY
AMATO COUTURE By Furne One The Bride Show Abu Dhabi 11th February 2012 Photos by Richard Martines
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ARISteo design by
ARIS PICO Al Wasl Rd, Jumeriah, Dubai, UAE • Tel. +971 4 344 8753 • ariespico@yahoo.com
Dubai, UAE Tel. +971 4 254 5366 ther2cole@yahoo.com
By LEO ALMODAL 373 C Villa# 3, Al Wasl Rd. Jumeirah 1, Dubai Tel. +971 4 385 5545 cecilia_couture@hotmail.com
NELSON for
PEROLA HAUTE COUTURE Abu Dhabi, UAE Tel. +971 50 317 4377 perolacoutre@perola.ae
JULES QUIRANTE Al Hanna Center, Dubai Tel. 050-927 7178 / 055 557 6494 julesatq@yahoo.com
Month 5 74 TRIPPIN’
things To Do This
No matter what their relationship status is, we know that being natural romantics, Filipinos adhere to the calling of the love month. And while we try to steer away from clichés, there is no denying that February is best celebrated with good old traditions. That’s why in this issue, we scoured Dubai’s best offers, to recommend a few fabulous things – from well meaning gift-giving to ageless candle-lit dinners, to help you have a Happy Valentine’s!
1
Experience heavenly spa
There is no better way to celebrate love other than pampering yourself or your partner. What’s the best form of indulgence? To us, it’s taking time off for a heavenly spa experience. An hour or two relaxing, having all your senses from head to toe rejuvenated and relaxed at the same time by an expert therapist, in a serene venue, is an indulgence that will make you forget everything else. For those in a relationship, there are couples’ treatments offered in select hotels and spas like the Westin Dubai and The Palace Hotel. If you’re single, pamper yourself at a posh spa instead of taking budget offers. You don’t need to splurge every time but once in a while, it’s highly recommended to spoil yourself with the best. However, if you are on a tight budget and going to high-end spa will break your wallet, you can always check out the deals at sites such as Cobone or Groupon. They have daily budgetfriendly offers. Or, better yet, buy home spa products (Elemis has a newly launched set that’s really amazing), light some candles in your bathroom, put soothing music in the background and indulge in a moment of serenity at your own place.
2
Go for a romantic dinner
Cozy dinner for two is a romantic tradition as old as time. For most couples, it’s always exciting to go out on special occasions most especially on Valentine’s Day. To make sure that this experience will make it in your partner’s diaries, men should look for the most romantic restaurant that suits the budget, tastes and preferred ambiance, book in advance, buy flowers and hand it to your woman before dinner. If you’re budget conscious, you can always opt to cook a delicious meal, set up a fancy table complete with candles at your very own flat. On the other hand, women should not just be on the receiving end – make sure you look extra lovely and confident by wearing a sexy yet appropriate dress (stay away from red, and go for the ever-so-chic little black dress instead, when in doubt), put on the right amount of evening make-up, don a chic hairdo and go for tasteful accessories. Enjoy your time by sharing a sumptuous meal and most importantly, romantic conversation in between. Meanwhile, those who are single need not fret. You can still have a cozy night with equally single friends. Meeting another single soul in a singles dinner at Valentine’s night out is an exciting idea - but don’t get pressured. Simply have fun, and enjoy being single.
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3
Get off for weekend getaway
If a spa trip or a posh dinner won’t do, head to a nice hotel and spend a night or two away from the hustle and bustle of your daily life. Let go of the worries and use the weekend to recharge. Single or not, this is a perfect opportunity to take time off and rest your body and mind. Immersing yourself in a different environment, may it be in a budget hotel or a five-star, will definitely help you distress. For couples who have children, try getting a nanny for the weekend, and go off on an intimate getaway. If you’re single, share the wonderful weekend in a beautiful hotel with a friend. Swim a little, finish a book or simply indulge in the art of doing nothing.
4
Give a gift
One of the most traditional ways of expressing one’s love is by giving gifts. Though they say it is the thought that counts, we say that you should also give it a good amount of thinking. In gift giving, you should consider not only yourself but most importantly the person you’re giving the present to. Worry about the budget, that’s reasonable, but if you really have been thinking of this occasion as an important one for your partner, then you should have at least prepared for it. Shower your partner with a well-thought of gift – for him, ties, watch, wallet and gadgets are recommended; for her, flowers plus jewelry, perfume, bag and gadgets. Single? Don’t even think of giving yourself a gift on the commerciallyaccepted official day for love. It sounds quite desperate to buy your own roses and chocolates on V-day. If you’re planning to do this, ditch it from your to-do-list. Save it for Christmas and your birthday instead.
5
Attend a single’s night out
Although during the love month the world is filled with appealing offers for the committed ones, still those who are single are not left out. These days, restaurants and hotels recognize the market of single ladies and single men who want to go out during the big day for loving. So they offer quite good packages for ladies’ night and boy’s night out. Ladies who fancy clubbing on Tuesdays or Wednesday nights will find glasses of bubby or reds without paying anything or at least on 50% off from the check. Still, a singles’ night out does not have to end up in a bar, it can be anything from a game night at a bro’s house, a Friday brunch, a house party, a home-cooked dinner or a series or movie marathons during the weekend. Being with fellow single friends at a month like February is quite assuring. So, stay away from your friends who are in a relationship – let them spend the love month in a romantic activity with their partners – and simply dwell on your own take on Valentine’s.
76 ILLUSTRADO PROFILE
BBOY JEROME “Jeromeskee” Aparis
BREAKING IS SHARING BY ZARAH PEREZ ZAMORA
It was an overcast Saturday afternoon at a safe house in the Philippines when Fil-American BBoy Jerome ‘Jeromeskee’ Aparis turned to his entirely female audience and began, “There are four elements to breaking.”
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ILLUSTRADO PROFILE 77
On a two-week trip to the Philippines, the Seattle-based Aparis made a stopover at the Visayan Forum safehouse, teaching survivors of human trafficking the fundamentals of breaking (commonly but erroneously referred to as breakdancing). He lists this experience with the safehouse residents, some as young as 12, undergoing treatment for years of being forced into modern day slavery, as most memorable. “It’s something that will always stick, (something that I) will remember forever,” the 28 year old declared. Aparis moved to Seattle with his famly when he was just three years old.. His first introduction to breaking came at the age of 13 when he saw a movie called “Beatstreet”; about a growing hiphop culture that included a b-boy among its main protagonists. “We’d watch videos on VHS; tried to mimic the moves. There were no-how tos, no studios, no classes on breaking at schools.” he recalled. This was in the early 90s and the Seattle BBoy scene was going through a resurgence. Aparis himself was inspired to find the local bboy scene largely made up of Filipinos. He trained at the Jefferson Community Center on Beacon Hill; well known today for providing a convergent space for breakers to hone their skill. There Aparis met Boss Crew, also then being mentored by the pioneers of breaking of in Seattle, DVS crew. Jeromeskee
explains that “then, your biggest goal was to be mentored. In breaking culture, you had to earn to be mentored. So I would be the first at the community center, practicing and I would be the last to leave. It was here when I met Fever; he is like the Michael Jordan of breaking in Seattle and he was my first mentor.”
Bboy has the moves to end bullying In his 15 years of breaking, Aparis notes that the BBoy scene went through several periods of resurgence alternating with episodes of waning interest. So in 1999, with competitions in Seattle growing limited, his then crew merged with another Seattle BBoy group and took to travelling to competitions out of Seattle as the Massive Monkees. They paid out of their own pockets to attend break battles from Canada and California then later on to the East Coast earning purposefully the ‘respect’ that Aparis points out as valuable to any breaking crew. “All we did was go to school, break. Go to work, break. We carried on for 2 years likes this before starting to get people wanting us at their events; we started with battles, then doing theater shows.’
Eventually the Massive Monkees portfolio of activities expanded into what Jerome segregates into three categories: competitions, corporate shows and finally, giving back to their community. An anti-bullying project in collaboration with the Mayor’s office came at the heels of their return as World BBoy champions in 2004 together with the declaration of their own holiday--April 26 as Massive Monkees day in Seattle. “The anti-bullying campaign was about a year of several 45 to one hour theater shows using breaking as a medium to communicate to kids in Seattle examples of what bullying means, what it looks like and how to get through it,” said Aparis. Giving back has become not just an outreach project of the Massive Monkees, but part of their character. About 90% of the Massive Monkees crew are FilAms. In 2009, they staged a show and organized free workshops to raise awareness and funds for the survivors of Ondoy (Typhoon Ketsana). Through the same initiative, what they call, Massive Relief, they raised funds during the 2011 Massive Monkees holiday for survivors of the tsunami in Japan. Aparis credits growing up in a Filipino family for this important part of the Massive Monkees character: “We’re very fortunate to know where we come from; even when
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About 90% of the Massive Monkees crew are FilAms. In 2009, they staged a show and organized free workshops to raise awareness and funds for the survivors of Ondoy (Typhoon Ketsana). travelling around the world we’d always be thinking about how to give back.” The Massive Monkees are currently enlisting their network in Seattle to support plans for the crew to come to the Philippines in May of 2012 to provide workshops for free; primarily to young survivors of Sendong in Cagayan de Oro, and elsewhere to show what Jeromeskee hopes audiences will see as “second and third generation are coming back and giving back to install a sense of hope to young Filipinos.” “I’m really passionate about using dance as a vehicle to impact people’s lives.
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Basically, it’s learning how to dance but it’s also helping my students get at that 1 minute of feeling amazing about themselves; to express themselves and learn more about themselves through dance,” Aparis explained.
Breaking with the best As a founding member of the Massive Monkees, Aparis has been involved in many of their major milestones including participating in season 4 of MTV’s America’s Best Dance Crew for which they placed third. He has starred in a documentary/instructional film called “Way of the Bboy” which won Best Music Documentary in the 2008 New
York International Independent Film and Video festival. Here, they performed with artists like Missy Elliot, Jay Z and 50 Cent. But the stories he tells most animatedly are of his performances with the kids he teaches at his classes and afterschool programs at community centers. His favorite achievement so far, he said is” “Going to class, seeing the students I’ve taught teach others; a whole other generation teaching another generation; building a community on sharing.” For Aparis, breaking is sharing. And sharing or giving back is simply a way of life.
80 GLOBAL BARRIO
My Pinoy Life in
Mosjøen, NORWAY
Salvacion Valera Valderama
Norway’s capital Oslo
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Norway’s famous Svartisen glacier
Since when have you been staying there? Can you recount briefly why you moved there? I migrated to Norway in July 1986 after receiving an offer to work as a nurse here. It was a very difficult decision since I had to leave my relatives, friends and family, especially husband and my son who was only two years and four months at that time. I moved to Norway first. And then after five months my husband and my son came to join me. I originally got a contract for a year and had the option of renewing it, if I wanted to. We thought of staying here in Norway for only three years but as years went by, we came to like and love the country. We are enjoying life here. Luckily, I have two older sisters, and my older brother also working as nurses, who all live in Oslo. They are married to
Filipinos, as well. My husband is working in ALCOA, an American company producing aluminum. We have three children - all boys (27, 22 and 15 years old).
and a still shorter border with Russia in the far northeast. Norway has a very elongated shape, one of the longest and most rugged coastlines in the world, and some 50,000 islands off the much indented coastline.
Tell us about your adoptive home
Norway is one of the world’s most northerly countries, and one of Europe’s most mountainous countries with large areas dominated by the Scandinavian Mountains; average elevation is 460 m and 32% of the mainland is located above the tree line.
Norway, one of the four Scandinavian countries where Denmark, Sweden and Finland are included, is known as “The Land of the Vikings” and the “Land of the Midnight Sun.” Norway is a country located in Northern Europe on the western and northern part of the Scandinavian Peninsula, bordering the North Sea in southwest and the Skagerrak inlet to the south, the North Atlantic Ocean (Norwegian Sea) in the west and the Barents Sea to the northeast. Norway, which has four seasons, has a long land border with Sweden to the east, a shorter one with Finland in the northeast
It is a very rich country ruled by a monarchy and has a very high standard of living. The country is strong in the field of oil production and is considered as one of the biggest oil producers in the world. Norway is also known for salmon exportation to countries all over the globe. Norway, whose capital is Oslo, is divided into 19 different provinces which have
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Fishing is a way of life in Norway
Oslo’s King Carl XIV Johan
The Valera Valderama family
Norwegian salmon is famous the world over
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A typical fjord scene
their distinct physical features, cultures and dialects. We live in the northern part of Norway, in Mosjøen, a part of Helgeland community and Nordland County. Mosjøen is known for the historic street of Sjøgata which constitutes Northern Norway’s largest collection of preserved 19th century wooden buildings. Around 100 historic buildings are taken cared of as part of the pulsating city life. The residents of Mosjøen are proud of their old town and will gladly show it to visitors. Walking through the area, you will find architectural gems and building preservation of class, including Wenches Keramikkverksted (ceramic studio), Atelier Marit K. Skog, Kulturverkstedet (the cultural workshop), Vikgården landhandel og kaffebu (general store and café), Ferdinand Restaurant, Espira Coffeebar, Fru Haugans Hotel, a guest marina and much more. Helgeland Museum’s own warehouse building in Sjøgata featuring exhibitions, which is spread over three floors, is also worth a visit.
Generally, Norwegian people are friendly and I love to see the different national costumes they wear during special occasions, especially on National Day.
Is there a Filipino community there? We have a Filipino association here at our place, but it is not so big because we are not that many here. I live in a small community where the total population is almost 15,000. Here, there are only 16 Filipinos, including myself. There are an estimated 9,000 Filipinos living in Norway and most of them are living in the Oslo urban area. Most of them are females – about 76 percent of the total community’s population. The first time I came, it was quite boring for me. But I think that’s quite natural when you are new to a certain place, especially during the period of adjustment. The lifestyle here is totally different, as compared to life in the Philippines. Girl soccer in Norway
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A picturesque Norwegian fjord
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Independence Day
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Nowegian Architecture
Oslo
What cultural practices/behaviors have you acquired from your host country? There are a lot of good Norwegian practices that I have actually acquired. Here, we greet each other even if we are not friends. We take our shoes off we enter a home, leaving them at the entrance/door. We also only eat a heavy meal once a day when we come home from work.
People consider each other as equals here, and I really love it. Skiing is a very common activity here since Norway is a land of snow. Unluckily, however, I don’t get to ski very often. My family has become accustomed to the Norwegian language, especially my children, but my husband and I talk in Tagalog and my native dialect – Ilocano, when at home. My children are also familiar with Tagalog and conversational Ilocano.
Your greeting to Filipino across the globe I am very proud to be a Filipino working in Norway. Even if I have lived here in Norway for so many years, my heart and my thoughts are still in the Philippines. I love the Philippines! Mabuhay! Long live the Philippines! Hello kababayans around the globe!
86 BAKASYON GRANDE The majestic Mayon Volcano sets an awe-inspiring mood on the way to Donsol
SHARKS, FIRE AND SUN ON BOARD A BANCA
A banca is a small outrigger canoe often used in the Philippines to traverse the many bodies of water that surround our archipelago. Deliberate vagabond Manny Escosa writes about a trip to Donsol where bancas gave him three different views of the Philippines and why to him they are more symbolic of Philippine island life than anything else.
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BAKASYON GRANDE 87
The Butanding
The swish, the wash, and the ripple of the propeller slowly lulled me into a shallow sleep as the banca moved forward on the calm sea. We were a motley international group of people in our varied swimwear and orange life vests, and in various states of unrest. One thing in common was a tight sense of anticipation and an adrenaline surge that comes with an experience you have never had and are about to jump into, literally. Suddenly, the boatman standing watch shouted “Ayun! (There!) Get Ready!” We hurriedly took our position at the sides of the boat, awaiting that command that would signal a first in all of our lives. “Talon[Jump]!” he screams. And we all plunged into the cold and murky waters of Donsol.
Idyllic Donsol
I struggled to gain my bearings and float properly. An urgent and insistent tap on my shoulder by our dive master, commanded me to turn to the direction where he was pointing wildly... And there it was…
Up close with the giant and genteel Like a hulking torpedo that slowly moves towards you came the first butanding (whale shark). Its mouth was wide open as it took in gallons of seawater rich with plankton on which it feeds. It was so big; it both surprises and frightens you, rendering you insignificant by its size. I gazed in awe and wonder, as it meandered by, its uniquely spotted body moving
88 BAKASYON GRANDE forward, thrust by its enormous dorsal fins and undulating tail. After a brief moment, it dove deeper into the turquoise depths. The whale shark was gone before I could sense that in my excitement, I had stopped breathing. We went up to the surface, boarded the boat, and repeated the jump 15 more times. Each dive was as tantalizing as the last, each moment forever etched in my memory. Whale sharks, locally called butanding are fascinating creatures. The butanding is not technically a whale, but part of the group of sharks called filter-feeders. These sharks do not have teeth but a series of filters that sift through water for plankton. Each of their spot patterns is unique as a human fingerprint. According to our briefing, their lifespan is about 70 years and while their territory encompasses almost all of the Pacific Ocean, they return to pocket breeding areas like Donsol. The Donsol eco-center uses software similar to charting constellations in order to identify the sharks that return to Donsol. A major conservation effort is in place to preserve these gentle, but almost extinct creatures.
Closer to the stars and light Dusk had arrived and the inky blackness of night slowly crept in as we boarded the banca. We moved away from the river shore, the wooden paddles providing a steady rhythm and sending gentle ripples on the river’s mirror image of the indecisive day-night sky. As the dark slowly won and the river yielded its reflection of the light sky, we were enveloped in a silent stillness of the night that is the border of twilight. In the dark, sounds of chirping cicadas, the bellowing of small frogs, the uncertain rustling of grass and tree leaves, with the occasional flop of jumping fish invaded and became the prevalent sound of the area. And there it was… First, a lone talisay tree (Indian almond tree) seemed to have just a few out-of-focus, pulsing dots of light. These pulses of light started multiplying until there seemed to be a swarm cloud that crowned the tops of the nearby talisay and kapok (Java cotton tree) trees. After a while, several trees were lit in the same way, until the entire riverbank was filled with pin-pricks of lights creating a water boulevard filled with a tapestry of winking lights. The fireflies came out in full force! We stayed in the banca trying to get closer to the lit trees. Staring fixedly at the fuzzy cloud of fireflies,
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you cannot help but marvel at the elaborate dance of light dots before you. The Philippine species of firefly is one of the few in the world that exhibit phased synchronization, which means that groups of the swarm will blink on and off at the same time. Because of their sheer number, your eyes are tricked into seeing a seemingly continuous light trail, when in fact these are many fireflies in different or similar phases of bioluminescent emission. And as with everything with nature, such a show takes a toll on the lives of the individual fireflies. Each will only live for less than a week after giving you one of the most mesmerizing micro-vistas you will ever witness.
Touching the sun I sat on the shore watching the sun as it moved quickly down the horizon and the row of bancas moored for the day. The sunset in Donsol seems faster than in other places that I have been to. Or maybe it is because here, though life appears to move at a slower pace than the city, the natural rhythm is packed with so many sights and sounds that are so breathtaking that it seems like a lifetime is crammed into each unique sequence. The sun went down rapidly, capturing in its final moments the slow end of the day. As the final fingers of light faded, it captured fishermen, dive masters and children into a momentary, still life painting. I am glad that the people and government of Donsol have learned to preserve its natural attractions. The efforts are all-encompassing starting with a law making it illegal to butcher the whale-sharks and ordinances conserving the river ecosystem. Tourists are briefed thoroughly about the whale-sharks, the fireflies, the coral reefs, and the dive spots and there are strict guidelines about how you interact with this level of biodiversity. Donsol for me is a place that truly breathes life and a new dimension into the phrase, “an experience of a lifetime”. We should all keep it that way.
A final glance at a volcanic mountain We left early the next day, since the airport was quite a distance. We said goodbye to the people we met at the whale shark encounter, the firefly watch, the eco-center personnel and our dive master. And just when we thought the experience was all done, we gazed at the majesty of Mayon for a final view that created a resolution to come back once more within our lifetime.
BAKASYON GRANDE 89
How to get there You can reach Donsol from Manila by taking a one-hour flight to Legaspi, Albay via Philippine Airlines, Air Philippines and Cebu Pacific. Once in Legaspi, there are buses, public vans, and private vans that go to Donsol. It is advisable to hire a private van so that you are not dependent on the vagaries of the provincial bus schedule or waiting for the public van to fill-up. Travel time is about
two hours. Our hotel arranged for pickup right at the airport, along with other guests.
Places to Stay Once in Donsol, you could check-in into a variety of hotels, at various budget points. Take note however that this city is still pretty rustic and while the prices are on the low side, the accommodations match the price. There are also no credit card facilities or ATM’s in Donsol, so bring pesos for all your expenses.
The Vitton Resort in Dancalan is a few minutes away from the city center of Donsol and right beside the Tourist EcoCenter. Everybody has to register at the Eco-Center for the compulsory briefing on biodiversity and the pass for the dives. You could also book your tours here and the bulk of whale-shark tours depart right from the Eco-Center Pier.
Best time to go The best time to go is March/April during the peak of the whale shark breeding season. Firefly watching is year-round.
Legaspi Airport
90 TRIPPIN’
A tale of two Islands:
CALATAGAN MANGROVE XFOREST
Batangas was made famous by its kicker coffee, its crown jewel of a volcano and its beaches. Dano Tingcungco uncovers a hidden treasure in Calatagan, Batangas that would add to the province’s fame. Blessed with a white-sand coastline flanked by the West Philippine Sea and Balayan Bay, Calatagan is what many would call a sleepy town. Stripped of the many trappings of urban comfort, the plethora of resorts along its coastline make for its wealth. With many of the rich and famous owning vacation estates in the area, it was once previously dubbed the “Forbes Park of the South.” One of the many untouched secrets in Calatagan is a couple of islets off its coastline called Ang Pulo. Home to a rich mangrove forest, these two naturally formed islets have, for decades, provided means of livelihood to Calatagan fishermen in a place where seafood counts as one of its main produce. The two islets of Ang Pulo - Pulong Buhangin and Pulong Pinaglabanan - are named according to their heritage and unique character. Pulong Pinaglabanan was once a shortlived Japanese fort during World War II in 1944. As Calatagan local and now town
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councilor Francis Languitan tells it, local history and folklore have it that when Japanese soldiers turned the mangrove islet into a fort, news quickly spread in the town until it reached members of the guerrilla group Hukbong Bayan Laban sa Hapon or Hukbalahap.
The sheer abundance of mangrove trees in this islet has also led to its being affectionately called “puntod,” as it resembles a rural cemetery with its lush flora.
The islet soon became the backdrop of a battle between the Huks and the Japanese. Three Filipinos, one each from the town of Nasugbu, Calatagan and Talisay, died in the bitter encounter. But this paved the way for the locals to reclaim their land. To this day, the islet serves as a solemn memory of this battle.
These days, “Ang Pulo” is home to a motley crew of students, corporate employees and cause-oriented groups aiming to explore and study what remains to be the last few mangroves in the country.
Pulong Buhangin, meanwhile, owes its name to its topography. Surrounded by different species of mangroves, the islet boasts of a white-sand beach center. Mangrove seedlings and sprouts show how far afternoon high tide threatens to encroach the center of the islet. But locals say that no matter how high the tide gets, the white sand remains untouched by the sea.
Home of knowledge and romance
The locals worked with various organizations and agencies such as the Philippine Coast Guard and Conservation International Philippines to reforest the islets starting with 120,000 seedlings and turning it into the Calatagan Mangrove Forest Conservation Park. It still remains virtually untouched by the pedestrian tourist, but locals say more and more couples and families are getting to know this discreet hideaway. Maybe so, but the beaten track to Ang Pulo
TRIPPIN’ 91 remains nondescript to this day. The only structure to welcome your arrival in this town is a long concrete highway swathed left and right with rice fields playfully alternating - as in a dance - with quaint rural houses painted in Mediterranean colors. There are no neon or tarpaulin signs to point you in the right direction, but barangay officials in motorcycles will gladly join your convoy. From the highway, the road turns itself into a foliage-ridden dirt road, roughly two kilometers of various lefts and rights here, with only hand-painted arrows in planks as your guide. At the coastline, a wide balsa manually driven by four to eight men will take you to Pulong Buhangin where the only comfort is the surrounding sea, the whispering mangroves, and the white sand beach center. Roughly a kilometer’s worth of bamboo bridges and boardwalks will be your only way to get around the islet. From the white sand center, the boardwalk diverges to an intersection that promises an adventure. Walking along the boardwalks will lead you to 17 different species of mangroves in the islet, complete with their scientific names and pictures. Even with the surrounding signs, the place keeps its rustic, untouched feel. At the far east of the islet is the main watchtower of Pulong Buhangin, the highest point of the islet where you can see the entire expanse of mangroves stretching all the way into its coastline. The watchtower can serve as an impromptu bedroom; should you wish to get a little closer to earth (and sand), various huts serve as suites to fans of the rustic and untouched. Should you grow tired of staying on land with the mangroves, or if frolicking with your beloved in tranquil waters is more your fancy, the park also offers numerous boats (both motorized and manual) and
kayaks at your disposal for a nominal fee. Even with the boardwalks, signs, and established (and befitting) modes of transportation, the Calatagan Mangrove Forest Conservation Park remains a work in progress. “We’ve done a lot to restore our treasure, we’ll do a lot more to keep it this way, if not better,” Ricasa said. From being a province known for coffee, volcanoes and beaches, Batangas will be equally famous for its mangrove forests in no time.
How to get there There are many ways to get to Ang Pulo, but the most recommended way is via South Luzon Expressway (SLEX). From SLEX, take Santa Rosa Exit, going straight to Santa Rosa-Tagaytay Road, switching
to the Tagaytay-Nasugbu Highway at the end of the road. A straight drive to the Tagaytay-Nasugbu Highway will take you from Tagaytay to Nasugbu, Batangas, crossing Lian, until you get to Calatagan town. From the town proper, barangay officials in Quilitisan village will lead you via convoy to a dirt road to the right of the highway leading to the tip of the town. Ride a balsa to cross the waist deep seawater to Ang Pulo, first to Pulong Buhangin, then another balsa from Pulong Buhangin to Pulong Pinaglabanan. Approximate travel time: 3-4 hours from Metro Manila. The Calatagan Mangrove Forest Conservation Park Ang Pulo, Brgy. Quilitisan, Calatagan, Batangas, Philippines Contact number: +63 910 4206480
92 GLOBAL BARRIO NEWS
New Tourism Campaign Wows InternationalTravel Experts This year’s ASEAN Tourism Forum at Manado, Indonesia witnessed the new Philippine brand launch with the line - ‘It’s more fun in the Philippines.’ “ATF 2012 is a perfect platform to introduce to some 1,600 international delegates composed of buyers and sellers, the NTO community and media delegates,” Philippine Tourism Secretary Ramon R. Jimenez, Jr. said. Focusing on the country’s core strength, the campaign singles out what no other destination can offer - and that is the Filipino people. The Lonely Planet guidebook calls Filipinos ‘among the most easygoing and ebullient people anywhere.’ Meanwhile, a constant truth that comes out in the passenger exit surveys is the “warmth and hospitality of the people.” “Our strategy is simple: while other countries invite you to observe, Filipinos can promise a more heartfelt and interesting experience. Wherever you go, whatever you do in the country, it’s the
Filipinos that will complete your vacation and will make your holiday unforgettable,” says the new tourism chief, who accepted the post in September 2011. The Filipinos are already known around the world to be one of the happiest and warmest people on earth. In a survey conducted among expatriates by international bank HSBC, it was revealed that the Philippines is the 8th friendliest country for them. The campaign hopes to enjoin the whole
country in creating positive buzz of the tagline. The campaign was trending on Twitter Friday noon when it was earlier introduced to local media. Catching like wild fire, netizens flooded the web with creative ways to interpret the line through do-it-yourself-memes which could likely land on shirts, billboards, stickers and other collaterals. Meanwhile, the ‘#1FORFUN’ local slogan aims to rally the Filipino nation to strengthen and sustain this well-appreciated fun character and be a “constant reminder to make sure people’s experiences in our country are positive, enjoyable, and most of all, fun,” Jimenez added. The presentation was well-received during the Philippine-hosted dinner on 13 January 2012 at the Sultanraja Hotel. The occasion was graced by North Sulawesi Governor Sinyo Harry Sarundajang, Philippine Ambassador to Indonesia Maria Rosario Claudio Aguinaldo and Consul General Jose Burgos. The Philippines registered very healthy growth in number of visitors from around the globe. From January to November 2011, visitor arrivals reached a total of 3, 522, 887 surpassing the 2010 year-end arrivals of 3, 520, 471.This feat recorded an increase of 12.66% over its previous year’s volume of 3,126,886 covering the same months. The biggest arrivals were registered in July with a volume of 360,784 visitors while the month of November recorded the highest growth of 19.80%. During the same period, visitors from the Middle East Region posted very good increase of 19.35% compared to the same period last year. The region’s top visitors were from Saudi Arabia (+28%), UAE (+11%) and Kuwait (+18%), which all registered positive gains.
Philippine Volcanoes to Play at the Hong Kong Sevens InternationalRugby Tournament
The Philippine Rugby Football Union are proud to announce that the Philippine National Men’s 7s Rugby team has received its invitation from the International Rugby Board to compete in the world’s largest rugby sevens tournament, the Cathay Pacific/HSBC Hong Kong Sevens. Scheduled on March 23-25, 2012 at the Hong Kong Stadium (capacity 40,000) the Hong Kong 7s is a by-invitation-only tournament attended by the top sevens teams in the world like New Zealand, Australia, Fiji and England. It is considered the premier leg of the HSBC Sevens World Series played in Australia, Dubai, South Africa, New Zealand, USA, Japan, Scotland and England. Sevens Rugby, which plays seven men per team on the field, is a faster, more exciting version of Rugby Union which plays 15 men per side. It was the Philippine Volcanoes’ Silvermedal winning performance at the Borneo 7s held in September 2011, which merited the invitation to this prestigious tournament. Ranked 7th in a field of 12 teams, the Volcanoes, led by Men’s 7s Captain, Jake Letts, guided by National Coach Matt Cullen and Assistant, Noel Flowers, surprised everyone by beating their highly-regarded rivals one by one, finishing second only to Asia’s number one ranked, Japan. “This invitation to the Cathay Pacific/ HSBC Hong Kong Sevens marks a milestone in the history of the Union” Says PRFU President, Alvin San Diego. “It’s a testament to the hard work of our players, coaches and supporters and more importantly, proof that Filipinos can excel in the sport of Rugby.”
94 ONLI IN DA PILIPINS
Onli In Da Pilipins - 1. n. a phrase used to define anything or anyone that only exists anywhere in the 7,107 islands of the Philippines || 2. adj. a phrase used to describe a Pinas episode or a Pinoy persona so rare one would never find anywhere else in the WWW (whole, wide world). It merits a documentation of some sort.
WE’RE THE KING & QUEEN OF HEARTS TGIF. Thank God it’s February. We have the license to say the cheesiest lines, listen to the mushiest songs, do the craziest stuff for the object of our desire, and wear the reddest clothing we can get a hold of in the name of L-O-V-E. That four-letter word that Pinoys and Pinays alike find so hard to resist because we’re probably the #1 fans of David Pomeranz aka hopeless romantics. And since 2012 is a leap year, party on you love fools, we have an extra day pass to the Land of the Loving. But beware, guys (most especially the very cute ones, i.e. the likes of Coco Martin), you might be in for a shotgun wedding. It’s Pikot Season, too, in case you didn’t know.
Search for a Significant Other What are you looking for in an S.O.? It doesn’t necessarily have to be attainable, really. So, don’t be shy, my fellow Filipinas. Out with your list! Tall, dark, handsome, and/ or katawang pang-romansa espesyal — say it loud and clear.
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(Tomoh!) By Aby Yap
Yes, we may giggle like high school girls straight from a convent school (which will surely warrant a scolding from Mother Superior). But don’t tell a lie, ‘wag magdeny because we are, in all honesty, on the lookout for that hunk of a man created in the likeness of Adonis. Chiseled physique, broad shoulders, toned muscles, six-pack abs, and no man boobs, please.
for bahag-wearing statues. He’s also the one who can easily convince us that it’s worth giving tuna hotdogs a try, even just once.
We perfectly understand why Anne Curtis and Christine Reyes, gorgeous creatures that they are, had to go through a catfight for Derek Ramsey. This is yet another reason to envy you, Angelica Panganiban.
What is it for the choosy Filipino male then? He’d say simple, kind, faithful, loving, and all those nice adjectives you usually write down in a slum book but what he’s in pursuit of can actually be summarized in two words: dalagang Pilipina. (Awww, isn’t that sweet and loyal?)
That’s why in all his wood-like acting, we cry that Aljur Abrenica is by far the best Machete for women who have a soft spot
And that’s why Piolo Pascual will always be Papa P. to us, regardless of what inggiteros spread around. The sight of him is an easy reminder of your favorite dish. Kanin na lang ang kulang. Enough said.
He can go gaga over Lady Gaga’s sexy
ONLI IN DA PILIPINS 95
• Telenovela Marathon You’re truly, madly, deeply in love with each other. But not everyone is cool with it. Your parents threaten to disown you. Your cousin is into your fiancé, too. To top it all, you discover that you’re adopted and might just be your lover’s long-lost brother or sister! Congratulations for being able to endure this much drama.
• Emo(tionally Unintelligent, oops)
getup or be flattered when some pretty woman gushes over his new haircut. BUT, and despite his declaration of being modern and metrosexual, he’s still badly smitten by Maria Clara (she holds the key not to a diary of frenemies switched at birth, but to Crisostomo Ibarra’s heart— just in case you’ve been watching too many telenovelas). Now, you neither have to wear your hair curly (long, straight, and black will do, so invest in a good shampoo and conditioner) nor buy yards of cloth for a wardrobe of baro’t saya. You don’t even have to bring a huge abaniko 24/7 to cover your face every time you smile (or yawn). Just wear that di-makabasag-ng-pinggan look. Make no mistake about LOL (Laughing Out Loud) and more so, LOLROF (Laughing Out Loud Rolling On Floor) even if he’s funnier than Jose and Wally. And when he finally invites you out, be ready with the standard mahinhin/ pakipot reply, “Strict ang parents ko.” Have him chop wood, fetch water from NAWASA, and woo the entire clan first before asking him to marry you in all the churches in town. After all, you’re the dalagang Pilipina he’s secretly wishing for—whether he admits it or not.
Updating your Relationship Status So, you’re “In a relationship/It’s complicated” mode (if it’s complicated enough, then you’re in a relationship), your Facebook proudly announces to the online world, your stalkers, or anyone who cares to check out your profile. Should there be a subheading for this (a proposal that might excite Mark Zuckerberg and his millions of Pinoy followers), which category would you fall under?
• Young Love
You sing “I’m on the top of the world…” with the enthusiasm of Julie Andrews in the Sound of Music one minute and “Love hurts, love scars, love wounds, and marks…” the next. What’s worse is that you’re even applying eyeliner while doing it. Simply because she forgot to text you “Elow po.”
• “Best Friends” You’ve known each other for so long. You’re very good friends. But is this all you’d ever be? After those endless hours of HOHOL (Hang-out, Hang-out Lang) and those steamy moments of MOMOL (Make-out, Make-out Lang)? Cut the crap! Even Jolina-Marvin, John Lloyd-Bea, and Sharon-Aga knew the real score.
• Miles Away
As newbies in love during the FB era, there’s not a day that passes by without you being (annoyingly) kilig to death. So, you can’t help but anecdote your milestones as a couple through your several photo albums (e.g. 1st Date at Luneta, 2nd MRT Ride 2gether) and status updates (e.g. Spent a day with wifey/hubby. Love you).
Your frequently used line is “I miss you” (sometimes you add “like crazy” if you feel like doing a videoke performance). Every December, too, you renew your SMP (Samahang Malamig ang Pasko) membership, to the bitterness of the NBSB/NGSB (No Boyfriend/Girlfriend Since Birth) herd. All we can say is, “Keri mo ‘yan.”
• Fairy Tale
• Virtual Romance
You see him as Mr. Dreamboy. He sees you as Sheryl Cruz, er, his Dreamgirl. You never even quarrel that it’s almost bordering on boredom. Maybe you’re just so in love…with the idea of love? Mirror, mirror on the wall, ain’t this the weirdest relationship of them all?
You exchange stories through Instant Messenger. You feed each other’s pets through PetSoc. You visit each other’s homes through Sims Social. You flirt, kiss, fight, and make up through emoticons and audibles. Don’t you ever have plans of taking it to the next — ahem, physical — level? Woloh long…