Indulge Magazine - Laugh Long by Indulge Magazine

Indulge

April/May 2013

spirit|soul|body

Unity=Joy Letitia Shelton A Joyful Gift Jessica Brown An Inheritance of Joy Veronica Kilrain Optimism is an Attitude Jane Averill Laugh Your Way to Better Health Dr Cris Beer

PLUS

- Craft for Mother's Day - Perfect Picnic Food - Fun & Fancy Free Locks

Laugh Long *How to have sustaining joy

Indulge | April/May 2013 | 1

Indulge eMagazine is part of the iluvthoseshoes Project which seeks to empower women in their journey through life by resourcing them, spirit, soul and body. Empower = make more confident; to give authority Resource = source of help; solutions to problems

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iluvthoseshoes Project www.iluvthoseshoes.com

Editor-in-Chief

Charissa Steffens editor@indulgemagazine.com.au

Creative Director

Natasha Smith info@nspstudio.com.au

Technical Director

David Steffens info@indulgemagazine.com.au

Website Development Dan Harding

Senior Editors

Nicky Hurle Catherine Johnsen

Proofing

Barrie Nicholson Catherine Johnsen

The Cover

Cover: Jessica Brown Photography: Natasha Smith, NSP Studio Photography

Fashion Editor Tanya Epis

Food Editor Angela Frost

Contributors

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Jane Averill Dr Cris Beer Gina Hamilton Veronica Kilrain Sue Peters Vanessa Nicholson Candice Schmidt Charissa Steffens Bel Thomson

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Indulge eMagazine is published bimonthly by the ILTS Project Pty Ltd (ACN 147832906). All rights are reserved and the contents are copyright and may not be reproduced without the written consent of the publisher. ILTS Project (“the Publisher”), their related companies and officers herby disclaim, to the full extent permitted by law, all liability, damages, costs and expenses whatsoever arising from or in connection with copy information or other material in this magazine, any negligence of the publisher, or any person’s actions in reliance therein. Any dispute or complaint regarding placed advertisements must be made within seven days of publication. Inclusion of any copy must not be taken as any endorsement of the Publisher. Views expressed by contributors are personal views and they are not necessarily endorsed by the Publisher. All reasonable efforts have been made to trace copyright holders by the Publisher. The Publisher and the authors do not accept any liability whatsoever in respect of any action taken by readers in reliance on the recommendation set out in this magazine.

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From the Editor... During the Easter holidays I took my daughter to see The Croods in 3D at our local cinema. Although not my first experience of watching a film in 3D, it has been a while since I last donned a pair of those ‘oh so’ attractive glasses. I must admit; secretly I was a little excited to see what the experience would hold. As the movie began, I watched with delight as all the little arms in the cinema reached out trying to catch the leaves, bubbles, and any other object that seemed to drift down upon them from the air. It was amazing the depth that was achieved in the film, like a pop-up Christmas card. The effect was fascinating, but anytime I lifted my glasses, the image became disappointingly flat, uninteresting, and fuzzy. I felt robbed of the joy of the experience and quickly put my new specs back on! As we watched, it struck me that this extra dimension is akin to the effect that joy creates; it too can bring a real depth and delight to our every day. Joy is a fruit of the Holy Spirit (Galatians 5:22) and when we come to know Jesus as our Lord and Saviour, the Holy Spirit inhabits us (1 Corinthians 6:19-20) and therefore, joy does too! In the midst of life’s challenges we can forget that we have the purest joy living within us and it’s as if we take off our glasses, only to be confronted with a fuzzy and uncertain world. Life is not always easy, but joy is always available! As you read through this issue of Indulge, my prayer for you, daughter of our Heavenly Father, is that you will experience a fresh wave of His joy in your life. Enjoy the stories you are about to share in, grab hold of the truths, and keep them close to your heart as you read our “Laugh Long” issue.

Love Charissa xx 6 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au

contents

Spirit

Unity = Joy Letitia Sheldon {08} Charissa Steffens

An Inheritance of Joy {16}

Body

Optimism is an Attitude {18}

Laugh Your Way to Better Health {46}

Soul

Fun & Fancy Free Locks {48}

Veronica Kilrain Jane Averill

A Joyful Gift - Jessica Brown {22} Charissa Steffens

Dr Cris Beer Tanya Epis

Two Paths Become One {32}

Mother's Day Craft {52}

When Joy is a Choice {36}

Perfect Picnic Food {54}

Bel Thomson Sue Peters

Contagious Joy {38} Candice Schmidt

Book Reviews {42} Gina Hamilton

Vanessa Nicholson Angela Frost

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Spirit

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Has Christ been gentle and loving towards you? Then make my joy complete by agreeing with each other. Have the same love. Be one in spirit and purpose.â&#x20AC;? Philippians 2:1-2 (NIRV)

Unity = Joy

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â&#x20AC;&#x153;What is the use of the church if we are not bringing healing?â&#x20AC;? 10 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au

The Joy of Unity Words: Charissa Steffens Images: Natasha Smith NSP Studio Photography

etitia Shelton was raised within the church. Her story is idyllic, growing up in her dad’s church; she went to Bible school in her early twenties and returned to work as a youth pastor. Life was good, until one night she met with a group of young women who all confessed that they had been sexually abused. That horrific moment birthed within Letitia the need to do more, to reach beyond the walls of her church and into the very heart of her city. Having grown up in a rich heritage of unity, Letitia began to join together with others to see ‘City Women’ established. City Women seeks to make their home of Toowoomba, in regional Queensland, a better place for all women and girls, particularly those in crisis and need. Over the past nine years, City Women have seen many women, young and old, inspired, ministered to and transformed by love and a helping hand. We caught up with Letitia and asked her to share about her incredible journey with us. You grew up with your dad as pastor. Is your dad still pastoring today? Yes, he will never retire. Where is retirement in the Bible? Seriously! He is still happy to be pastoring. His main heart and focus has always been the unity of the church. He has spent a lot of time over the past 40 years pulling the pastors in Toowoomba together. So many things like Easterfest and City Women have grown because of his heart for unity in our community. Tell us about how ‘City Women’ began? Due to the unity of the church in Toowoomba, there was a lady from another church who had a heart for

girls and she had been asking God what she could do to help reach young women. She had a vision of running camps for non-churched girls; she saw me in the vision working with her; so she came up to me at a meeting and introduced herself, explaining what she was thinking. I thought, ok I could do that. We worked together with various churches to build a team and then co-operated with the chaplains to find girls who might participate. We launched the first camp and while it was progressing my eyes were opened to the devastation of these broken lives. Although Toowoomba looks pretty, and that is a real danger because you think it looks pretty, and we have lots of churches and great stuff happening, there is a real undercurrent of brokenness, abuse, and depression. A few weeks after the first camp I had a group of five girls to my place for dinner and we just talked to them about their lives. They all talked about being sexually abused and by the time the fifth girl was sharing her story she just looked at me and said “Tish, we have all been abused. We need help.” So that was a real kick in the pants from God to get up and do something. What is the use of the church if we are not bringing healing? We can all get very busy and distracted within the church. I was running a busy church youth group with church kids, but we are actually here to rescue those who are broken.

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â&#x20AC;&#x153;...if someone has a dream, we will do all we can to help support them to get it up and running.â&#x20AC;? 12 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au

They’re the ones that Jesus went to. It was probably a year or two later that I pulled together some other Christian women who had a similar heart and heard more stories about the women that they were working with, and we decided to combine our efforts. How many churches are involved in City Women? We have about 650 women from about 43 churches that are working in various areas, but they are not all active at any one time. It doesn’t really matter which church they are from, it is about our mission to our city. How does City Women operate? We mobilise women to go out into the community. Under City Women are twenty different ministries. We just encourage women to find something that they are passionate about and volunteer their time to that.

to serve the pastor, rather than the pastor being there to serve the people, releasing people into the community. Who are your volunteers? Well the average life of a youth pastor is about 6-8months. It is often the case that with youth leadership we have the biggest needs and we put the most inexperienced person in charge; the young person looking after the younger person; but these girls need mums and dads, not just cool people with great games. All I do with young girls involves older people too. They are not necessarily teaching or running the events but they are there, hanging around, joining in and they are hilarious. I think the 65-85 year olds are our biggest resource, but too many churches don’t acknowledge them. They have wisdom, commitment, faithfulness, stability, and prayerfulness. They are really concerned about the next generation.

Each ministry has their own committee and leaders and they fundraise for their programs. My church supports my role by paying my wage; they see me as a pastor to the city. Early on we had a group of older ladies who decided they wanted to produce a cookbook to raise funds for us. I have to admit I was a little skeptical about how well it would work, but they did a great job and sold it through many of the coffee shops in the city, raising about $40,000 to help fund City Women.

Tell us about your 2020 Vision? We just wanted to be clear about what we are about. Each of the statements has a ministry behind them. For example one of the statements says: “A decrease in depression, suicide and eating disorders in females; an increase in healthy attitudes and actions to one’s body.” We run the Shine program (developed by Hillsong Church) in many of the local High Schools which helps educate girls about their value.

So the way City Women works is that if someone has a dream, we will do all we can to help support them to get it up and running. For example, a young woman came into my office a few years ago and said she had a passion to start a girls magazine. We hold City Women breakfasts and we gave her an opportunity to share her heart and vision from which she gathered and began her project.

It was never my intention to do all this, but every year God keeps growing and expanding and show us what to do. Basically our plan is to find out the needs of the people and meet them. Doing it together, as a community of churches is very biblical and I believe that doing it in separation is actually disobedience and one of the reasons why our cities are falling apart. We haven’t obeyed Him by loving one another and working together; He is serious about it and we should be too.

When we started City Women there were six ministries and now there are 20. I firmly believe that all the resources to save our city are in our city. The church hasn’t been good in the past at releasing people:we have wanted them in our programs

How is the unity of the churches impacting Toowoomba? It has been huge! Thousands of women and girls have heard the gospel because of it. Last year we started

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a home for girls called â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;The Gapâ&#x20AC;?. It is for at risk girls, trying to prevent them from turning to drugs or becoming another teenage pregnancy. There is a team of 50 women from seven churches that support that home. What you are able to create when you work together is amazing! We have had pastors praying together for 40 years; not just praying together to be nice, but actually genuinely loving each other and being best friends. They support each other, even financially, and are very aware of the responsibility that God has given and that we will be held accountable for what we do in our cities, not just our churches. What are the most pressing issues for young women today? There are three, based upon my observations; firstly, the breakdown of families and the loss of the father from the home. Many girls become sexually active because they are desperate for love. Research shows how devastating the breakdown of a family is on children. Secondly, the sexualisation of culture, the pressure our culture puts on girls is devastating and then thirdly, the absence of the church. Author Martin Lindstrom says that we now have the most depressed and insecure generation of girls on the face of the planet and I would put it down to those three things. In the absence of light, darkness prevails and that is what we are seeing.

City Women helps facilitate over 20 ministries in Toowoomba including Mother-Daughter Dinners, Girls Camps, Shine Program and many more.

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Images Courtesy of City Women

Dealing with such big issues day in and day out, how do you maintain your joy for your ministry? Joy is something that comes from God, so by staying close to Him, joy becomes a natural overflowing of what He is doing in your life. In what we do, especially with the girls, we make sure we have an immense amount of fun. We don’t take ourselves too seriously. In fact, one of the ministries City Women runs is called “Serious Fun”. After running our camps for girls we realised we need to reach out to the mums, so that ministry runs coffee nights and events for the mums of our girls. They wanted to have a lot of fun, but with a serious message; so that is what we try to achieve. What do you do for you, to feed your soul? I love to get outside in nature, bike riding and camping. I just find getting on my bike and going for a big ride helps clear my mind. I try not to think too much about what we do; I just take it day by day and remember that what I do is God’s work, and rest in Him. What is a favourite foundational scripture? Isaiah 32:9 “You women who are so complacent, rise up and listen to me; you daughters who feel secure, hear what I have to say!”(NIV) It is a very confronting scripture. It talks about the women, in Isaiah’s time, who thought everything was ok, but God rebuked them to get off their backsides and do something. I think that is what it was like here in Toowoomba too. We were sitting comfortably in our beautiful city, but we needed to get up and do something. R If you would like to learn more about City Women you can visit their website at www.citywomen.com.au

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Words: Veronica Kilrain Image: Natasha Smith NSP Studio Photography

An D Inheritance of Joy

avid, our four year old son, has a deep sense of being loved by God. He carries peace and joy in his life because of this simple knowledge. It is profound. He was born this way. David, like us all is a carrier of the presence of God. He simply gets it and he brings joy with him wherever he goes. Over the entire Christmas school holidays, his contagious giggles echoed through our home. His simple faith reminds me that God is love and joy-filled lives are our inheritance. More often than not, the hurry and worry of the world diverts us from our primary call in life; to

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know God in an intimate and personal way. The Scripture says, “Be still and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10). Stillness is connected to peaceful and joy-filled lives. When we enquire of God and call to Him, the spirit of God responds to our cry and His peace replaces the anxiety in our lives. The presence of God brings comfort, rest and joy, welcoming all who enter into our homes. The molecules of Heaven provide refreshment and strength through the Holy Spirit in a very practical way as Jesus is the centrepiece and heart of our homes. As a mother of four young children my feet hit the ground running most days and the task of running a busy home can be a real challenge! I used to think that experiencing the presence of God had to be a whole lot of hard work! The joy of God would operate in my life in fits and starts, but I was never really satisfied. After searching the Scriptures for some time, the Lord revealed a significant key that unlocked access to joy in my life. He showed me the truth of the new nature that was given to me at my spiritual re-birth and how I have joy as my inheritance. 2 Corinthians 5:21 says, “I am the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus” and Romans 14:17b states that, “The Kingdom of God is righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit”. The Father relates to us based upon Jesus’ performance on our behalf. Not on our fluctuating behaviour! Peace and joy began to flow in my family home as I rested in this truth. Peacefilled and joyful lives are the fruit of God’s grace towards us. As sons and daughters it is our inheritance. Joy becomes our strength and our homes become dwelling places for the Lord as recipients of acceptance grace. Some keys to joy-filled homes are: hAccept the free gift of God’s Grace. Ephesians 2:8 hForgiven by God, you have been empowered to forgive others. Colossians 3:13 hHonour and respect for each family member. This provides a platform where family members are celebrated and each personality is encouraged to contribute in a honourable way. hKind words. Kind and gentle words release mercy. They turn away arguments and believe the best in

the other person. Kind words usher in the presence of God. Peace descends like a dove when we partner with God in our homes. hThe spirit of wisdom and understanding gives us the ability to know what to say and when to say something as we manage conversations in our homes. Proverbs 3:17 tell us, “Her ways are pleasant ways, and all her paths are peace.” When we keep our eyes on wisdom we find security. hThe fear of the Lord is wholesome. It brings protection and guides us in our home making. Wisdom gives us the ability to speak at the right time. Proverbs 15:1 says, “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” Just as David has a simple faith and knows he is loved by God, we too can enter into rest and receive the promises of God for our lives. Joyful and peacefilled homes are our inheritance. R Veronica has written a book called “Walking in the spirit - the supernatural life of Grace”. She is a married mother with four children and has a prophetic ministry. To invite Veronica to speak you can contact through her website www.allthingsarepossible.com.au

Editor’s Pick!

“Veronica’s book will help you to bring the presence of God into your home in a powerful and practical way.” Charissa

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Words: Senior Pastor Jane Averill Image: istock

Optimism O is an Attitude

ne of my desires for 2013 is for this year to be a year of hospitality. Not just going out for a meal, but having friends over to our home and having a home-cooked meal. In the busyness of pastoring a fabulous and growing church, I found that it was easier to go out for a meal than have others over to our home (and I so donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t love cooking!) However my hubby (Murray) loves having people to our home Â and I do love to please my hubby! Murray bought me a lovely new candelabra and I dug out the beautiful dinner set given to me by

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my Grandmother as a wedding present thinking, “Goodness me, I’m 54, I’d better start using this!” I invited a lovely young couple over and spent many hours pouring over recipes, buying ingredients and then a whole day cooking for them. On the basis of that success, I decided that the next dinner party would be ten for tea! Woo Hoo! The cooking began in earnest. As the time came for the guests to arrive, I was feeling a tad stressed. “How will I ever get everything to be hot all at the same time?” I realised, rather late in the day, that I didn’t even have the correct sized pans to hold soup for ten. And so, as our guests began to arrive, I found myself taking out my stress on Murray, with some rather terse demands thrown his way. I quickly asked for his forgiveness and it was a fabulous night, though I wish I’d done it all a little less stressed and with a lot more joy! As I was pondering this later that night, it occurred to me that a happy host is way more important than the food being perfect. And isn’t this the way we should love this extraordinary and wonderful life that God has gifted us with. That we, who call ourselves followers of Jesus, get the amazing privilege of hosting His presence, even in the midst of the ups and downs of life! At this year’s Colour Conference, Brian Houston inspired us to take a blank piece of paper and write down vision for our lives. One of the more practical things I wrote on my page was this. “I want to be the most relaxed, optimistic, sexy, confident, wise and full of joy, happy wife Murray could have ever hoped for.” I also wrote, “....as I host His presence, my desire is that joy would be my strength and that this joy would be evident for all to see and that it would be enduring.” So, how do I cultivate this enduring and evident joy? I know that I have to be intentional in how I do that.

“This is the day that the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it.” Psalm 118:24

Right above my ironing board is a poster with these words, “This is the day that the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it.” (Psalm 118:24) Joy comes from believing this and intentionally living it out. For many years, I would get up each day feeling worn out and dreading the day ahead. Joyce Meyer says that our feelings will follow our decisions, so I have intentionally decided to think positive thoughts, believing that no matter what looms ahead in my day, that I can decide to enjoy the day! Optimism is a favourite word of mine. I write it in bright red lipstick on my mirror because it reminds me that optimism is an attitude. An attitude that says, “My God is a good God and I’m expecting good things for my day!” An attitude that allows me to get out of bed saying, “Yippee! Thank you God for another amazing day!” This is called ‘renewing the mind’. We can renew and rewire our thought patterns by intentionally articulating the optimism, the enthusiasm, the Joy of all that God has planned and purposed us for! “Relax Jane!” I can’t tell you how often I have verbalised these two words to myself. I have lived a lot of my life with anxiety and I have had to determine to articulate and believe the scripture that says, “Cast your cares upon Him.” Anxiety, Indulge | April/May 2013 | 19

worry, and stress will rob you of Joy. My ability to relax, to not be anxious, is totally dependent on my willingness to trust God wholeheartedly! When anxiety threatens to rob me of my peace and my joy, I have learnt the power of self-talk. “God is a good God.” “He has a great plan for me.” “His timing is perfect.” “I will obey you God and focus my thoughts on your goodness to me.”  I remember reading about an 108 year old woman who when questioned about her optimistic attitude said this, “I always look for the good.” What a wonderful way to live life! Looking for the best in others and looking for the best in every situation! I believe that when we intentionally do this, that we can’t help but be joyful in who we are and all we do!

Jane is a wife, mother (of two amazing adult girls), an ex-primary school teacher (she thanks God for the ‘ex’ part), a face book supremo, a disciple of Jesus and a great friend and example to many. At the age of 27, Jane had an encounter with Jesus Christ that totally reoriented her world. Eighteen months later she married Murray and has lived in heaven ever since (Murray wrote that part). Breast cancer in 2006 came as a shock but, if anything, has increased her passion for life, the richness of her friendships and her desire to live for Christ. In many ways Jane is the ‘mum’ of our Church and deeply loved by all who know her.

And in a couple of days, I have another lovely couple coming over for a dinner party, so this happy host is about to have some fun looking through some yummy recipes! May the joy of our Lord continually BE your strength!

“May the JOY of our Lord continually BE your strength!”

It’s time to make a stand for the

PRESERVATION OF OUR PUBLIC

SPACES ACL QUEENSLAND CONFERENCE – SATURDAY 4TH MAY 2013

The government is listening - but it’s time to show we are serious about protecting our children from hyper-sexualised advertising. Please come to this one day conference to show your support. Book online today at www.acl.org.au or contact wendy.francis@acl.org.au QLD conference flyer_final2.indd 1

Speakers include Senator Eric Abetz, MPs Shayne Neumann, Fiona Simpson, Mark Robinson, Liz Cunningham, Lisa France as well as 20 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au Jim Wallace AM, Prof Scott Prasser and Debra Byrne

19/02/2013 3:40:32 PM

An Invitation to Love... Dear Reader, Our prayer is that you would know how much you are loved by our Heavenly Father. So much so that He would send His only Son, Jesus, who would choose to die on a cross for you. It is through Jesus Christ that we can know and come into a full relationship with God. You do not have to be perfect, you just have to believe and ask Jesus to meet you where you are at in life. He will come and set you free and bring you into a peace and love that only God can offer. If you are unsure that you have a personal relationship with Jesus then we would love you to say this simple prayer.

Dear Jesus, I believe in you. I believe that you died on the cross for me. Thank you for your love. I confess that I have sinned and I wish to turn away from sin, please forgive me. Please come into my heart and change me from the inside out. Make me a new creation and let me know that I am your child. Help me to live my life for you from this day forward. amen

"This is real love: not that we loved God but that He loved us and sent His Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins." 1 John 4:10 If you have prayed this prayer, we would encourage you to find a local church and speak to a pastor. We would also love to hear from you here at Indulge eMagazine by emailing us at info@indulgemagazine.com.au

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Soul

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a joyful gift

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a joyful gift Words: Charissa Steffens Images: Natasha Smith NSP Studio Photography

“Joyful, Joyful Lord, we adore Thee God of glory Lord of love Hearts unfold like flowers before Thee…”

f I had to choose a song to describe Jessica Brown, this would be it. The original poem by Henry van Dyke, renewed as a contemporary hit in the movie Sister Act 2, takes on a physical form in Jessica. Jess, as her loved ones know her, is a vivacious young woman with the world at her feet (literally) and a love for God in her heart. Having recently emigrated from South Africa to Australia, Jessica shares her joy about her journey and how she has learnt to trust God. Jessica’s life has had a joyful clarity for many years; from a young age she desired to be a stage performer. She shares, “All my life, I knew that performing was what I wanted to do. I always knew I would be in musical theatre. I started dancing when I was four. I did ballet and then I started modern dancing when I was about nine years old. I loved it. I then started singing and I loved that too.” “Then I started acting and I thought ‘well musical theatre is what I want to do.’ I performed at eisteddfods and in all the school plays. I won the starring role of Noddy in our in our school musical. I was the Drama Queen of our grade, really!” she declares, laughing. “I got more serious about it the older I became. I went on to do two years of Musical Theatre (university level) in South Africa and then we found out we were immigrating to Australia this time last year.”

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With her dreams firmly in place, it was a difficult decision to leave behind all she had known and start again. “We don’t have any family here, so it was a big move", Jess explains. “But we prayed about it and felt a peace over the decision to come, so we [Jessica’s parents and two brothers] decided to go for it.” With the leap across the nations came a need for a new place for Jessica to continue her studies. “It was a relatively smooth transition”, she shares. “I flew to Australia and I auditioned at the Queensland Conservatorium at Griffith University where I was accepted. I was so excited that I could continue on with musical theatre. The industry in South Africa is much smaller. It is such a blessing to be able to study in Australia; there are so many more opportunities here.” For a woman in her early twenties, Jessica has a wellbalanced approach to her talents and life in general. She attributes this to her parent’s love and belief in her. “I am so blessed to have my parents; they knew that I was not an academic child, but they still always encouraged me to pass. My mother drove me to ballet twice a week, modern dancing three time a week, whatever I did. My mum is my biggest fan, they both are,” she says with gratitude in her voice. “My parents have been such a blessing, pushing me through the times when I didn’t want to keep going. I wanted to quit ballet when I was 15 years old, but my mum wouldn’t let me. I am so glad that she made me carry on. Ballet is a foundation of dance and I really did need to continue on with it.” Jessica nods knowing that mum was right.

“God has been so good to me. It is a joy to be able to dance on stage.”

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God said to me â&#x20AC;&#x153;I should be the

only applause you look for in life.â&#x20AC;?

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Jessica’s joy is evident as she shares about performing on stage. “I feel like I am the luckiest girl in the world!” she bubbles. “God has been so good to me. It is a joy to be able to dance on stage.” Her love for her art is as genuine as her love for God. “I always pray before I go on stage and just give God the glory for what I get to do.” She also serves in her local church as part of the worship team. “I love being involved at Church. Worship is a gift I can give back to Him.” Serving also helps her appreciate the fact that, “they are gifts that He gave to me and He can take them away. I am aware of where my gifts come from.” Being a Christian in a teenager’s world is not always easy, so I ask Jessica how she has maintained her connection with God. “I have swayed at times; I know God was not always a priority on my list. I have let other things become more important,” she admits. “What always brings me back is that I realise I can’t do anything by myself. I would always get to a point where I would try, but I would crumble and say, I can’t do this.”

He thinks of me, is all that should matter. It is a struggle not to look for approval from other people.” Jessica has a heart to encourage other girls to feel secure in who they are. To learn to love what God has made them to be. “We can only get to that place through having a relationship with God, not just by talking yourself up”, she believes. So where will this journey lead Jessica? I sense as I talk to her it is only the beginning of a path to the stars. She too believes in dreaming big, “I want to worship in Bethel (Bethel Church, California) and perform on Broadway… I have always dreamed big and this is a tough, tough industry, so only in God can big things happen. If it comes true, who knows? But with God all things are possible! Whatever road He takes me down, I know it will be satisfying.” R

She shares about the move to Australia. “When I was moving over here, I just wanted to spend time with my friends because I knew I was leaving so I wasn’t making time for God, but then I realised that the only one I could rely on was God.” With wisdom beyond her years, she explains, “in the end I knew it would be ok because the only person I did know was God. The same God that was in South Africa is the same God who is in Australia and He was so good to us.” Being in an industry where the spotlight shines brightly, it has not always been easy. Insecurity and the need for approval are two battles that Jessica has had to fight, just like any other teenage girl. “I was insecure at one time”, Jessica confesses. “I really looked for the approval of others and in this industry it is something that happens a lot because we are on stage. I had issues with how people saw my talents and me.” Then God spoke to Jessica and gave her a fresh perspective on her life. Jessica recalls, “it got to a point when God said to me, “I should be the only applause you look for in your life.” She shares, “As a performer that is what you want; you want the applause (of people), but God said to me that what

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“Joyful, Joyful Lord we adore Thee And in my life I put none before Thee Cos since I was a youngster I came to know That you was the only way to go” (Lyrics Lauryn Hill Sister Act 2)

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Two Paths I Become

t was a hot, Australian summer and my loneliness was palpable. As a senior in high school I had never had a boyfriend and boys were not interested in me. I secretly worried that I would be single forever.

One

Words: Bel Thomson Images: Courtesy of Bel Thomson 32 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au

That summer changed everything. I went on a high school music camp run by a group of Christian musicians. One day during the singing time, I was moved to tears; my silent fears surfacing in the salty flow. I felt so alone and was afraid that no one would ever want me. Out of nowhere, a girl I had never spoken to before approached me and said, â&#x20AC;&#x153;God wants you to know that He has someone special for you to marry!â&#x20AC;? I was totally blown away! How did

she know the reason for my tears? She prayed for me and my future husband. From that moment as a 17 year old, I knew God had a plan and I trusted that He would fulfil His promise. What a journey lay ahead! Wonderful, treacherous, difficult ... but ultimately worth the fight! It would be another 14 years before the promise was fulfilled. In those years I really grew to know God and I learnt that He was actually the true source of the love that I needed. I joined a great church where I made incredible friends to share the journey and spur me on. I found words in the Bible that encouraged me: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:5). This proved true; as I began to trust God as my guide in life, He directed me and my future husband so that our paths eventually crossed.

“Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your Heart.” Psalm 37:4

My dream was to be a singer and as my faith grew this was reflected in the songs I wrote. I completed a music degree and recorded several CDs and over time developed a music career. In my late 20s I began to tour and travel to share my music. I played at camps, churches, conferences and women’s events. I absolutely loved being on the road and knew it would take a special man to share this lifestyle with me. The longing for a husband was so strong and many times I was tempted to compromise. But inside I knew God had someone set apart for me and it would be worth the wait. I prayed for my future husband and kept asking God to help me wait for him.

“Two Paths Become One” Phil and Bel Thomson on their wedding day.

Meanwhile, in another state in Australia, a young man was praying the same prayer! God had set this special man apart for me, just as He promised! Phil waited throughout his 20s to meet ‘the one’. It was a long and lonely wait, given that from the age of 15 he knew he wanted to be a husband. His parents were high school sweethearts. Phil loved hearing their story growing up and he had assumed that his life path would be similar. But his road took a different course. Phil completed university and travelled overseas before pursuing a corporate career. He kept an

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eye out for his future wife, but she was nowhere to be found! His work took him to Coffs Harbour, a regional town in New South Wales, and he settled there, still alone and still single. He felt God direct him to be part of a small church with very few young people. He wondered why God would want him to be there, when his heart’s desire was to be married. Surely he would never meet a wife! Even though it didn’t make sense, he stayed at the church where he felt God wanted him. With its close family environment, this church became a source of real character growth and support for Phil. Meanwhile he prayed and prayed and prayed for his future wife! Other people also prayed - he enlisted an army! Along with all that prayer he also made a list of all the qualities he was looking for in a future wife. Some people told him it was impossible and that he was too picky. But Phil believed the verse in the bible that says “Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart” (Psalm 37:4). He felt reassured that God had promised someone special for him. True to His word, as Phil stayed on God’s path, it intersected with mine and God wrote the love story of which we had both dreamed. In 2011 my music tour took me right to Phil’s church in Coffs Harbour! Little did I know that the most awesome man in the world was hidden away there. By then, Phil was in leadership at the church and he actually interviewed me on stage before I sang. He asked me a few standard questions, then he said, “Go and have a seat and we will get you back up to sing later in the service”. And I replied, “Is that all of your questions? I normally get questions like ‘are you single’?” Well, when I said that, the whole church went “Ooohhhh!” They had all been praying for Phil to meet the right girl! Phil looked at me, I looked at him, and the rest is history! God confirmed the match in so many ways and our dating was filled with wonderful adventures. We were married a year later! Our wedding day was a truly great celebration! Sharing in our delight were many people from our churches and families who had prayed for this day for years. Amidst the flowers and promises, their smiles and tears were in abundance! We had both 34 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au

waited for this day since we were teenagers and now we were bursting with excitement and thankfulness. For Phil, as I walked up the aisle dressed in white, it was the realisation of God’s promise to him. My name actually has three meanings: 1. Beautiful 2. Prayerful 3. God’s promise! Yes, I was literally God’s promise to Phil and the answer to many prayers! He was moved to tears as I walked down the aisle towards him. For me, our wedding day was the fulfillment of the promise God had made to me many years ago when He said that He had someone special for me. Phil was all that I had hoped and dreamed. It was an incredible day of joy and celebration. That day, our two paths became one. Now we get to travel and tour together. Phil is gifted in areas where I am weak and vice versa - we make a good team! I see now that God used the years of waiting to prepare us for each other. It was totally worth the wait. I have learnt that God’s way is never easy, but it is absolutely the best. It is worth the fight to stay the course. I can testify in my own life; Great is His faithfulness! R

“Great is His faithfulness!” Bel Thomson (nee Bel Morrison) is an awardwinning Australian singer/ songwriter and speaker whose ministry takes her to conferences, schools, camps, outreach events, and Christian churches of all denominations. Bel’s smile and authentic presence draw audiences of all ages into songs of hope. Her lyrics press beyond the surface, in a music ministry that weaves songs with real life stories of God’s faithfulness. To listen to her music or enquire about bookings visit www. belthomson.com. To keep in touch with Bel’s ministry: www.facebook.com/BelThomsonOfficial and www.twitter. com/BelThomson

biloela : 15 june townsville : 20 july sunshine coast : 2-4 august brisbane : 24 august gold coast : 7 september

SHE IS...

LIGHT CONFERENCE

www.sheis.net.au

worthy. valuable. loved. significant. beautiful

innisfail : 25 may

Indulge | April/May 2013 | 35

When Joy Is A Choice I Words: Sue Peters Image: Nataha Smith NSP Studio Photography

have this gorgeous friend, Maree, who just lights up a room when she walks into it. She is one of those caring, fun, hilarious, bubbles of energy who is an absolute pleasure to be around. Maree can tell the funniest stories that will have asthmatics gasping for air, snotty noses running for tissues and any mum who has given birth more than once, reaching for the Poise! I love Maree and her zest for life. But as her friend, I also know that life hasn’t always been smooth sailing. I know there have been days when being the ‘funny friend’ hasn’t come easily. In May 2012, poor Maree had a terrible time with a hugely inflamed gall bladder (and for those who’ve have gall bladder problems you would know this is no laughing matter!) resulting in surgery and a long recovery. A little of the light dimmed in Maree’s eyes at that time. Not long after, Maree’s father was gravely ill, and Maree’s light muted a little more. But it was at this time that I witnessed a change in Maree’s heart. Resolve took place. And a choice was made. Deuteronomy 30:19 says: “Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. Now I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life, so that you and your descendants might live!”

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In those weeks and months I witnessed Maree choose life, choose joy, and choose to find the good

in each and every situation. She made a deep seated resolve not to be overwhelmed by the circumstances surrounding her or the illness inside her. Her resolve was to walk in the joy God had planned for her. And of course, her resolve influenced others in her family, in her workplace, and in her community. Like ripples spreading out on a pond, Maree’s joy touched everyone she met in spite of her unchanged circumstances.

Someone who, regardless of the circumstances, genuinely and intentionally chooses life. That’s what I want to do.

I like to think I’m a bit like Maree. I genuinely think of myself as the funny one in the family, though my husband and kids totally disagree (well at least I laugh at my own jokes so that has to count for something, right?) I like to think I can tell a story that is giggle worthy. And secretly I have often thought of comedy as a back-up career should the need arise. Seriously. I have....

So girlfriends, let’s all take a Maree version of a Selah: and Poise and consider!R

Each morning when I wake up I’m going to resolve to choose life. I choose to enjoy the world around me. I choose to see God’s children through His eyes. I choose to embrace the good and shine the light of Jesus to others.

ying e enjo e r a M e full! to th

life

But is my opinion of my level of joyfulness even close to reality? Am I totally misinformed about how much joy I actually ooze? You see my physical body has begun to tell a different story. I have developed (much to my disgust) two wrinkle lines between my brows. The dreaded frown lines. Ugh, bring on the Botox, I say. I’ve discovered that my natural, default facial expression is very similar to Grumpy Cat. And that worries me. A lot. Seriously though, I have also found myself with a knot in my stomach when I am worried or anxious. A knot that can only be calmed by deep breathing and some doona-down-time. Sometimes I get so shaky with nerves and apprehension that I avoid going out rather than have people ask questions. My physical body is telling me that joy has not been my default position lately. This I do know though; I don’t want to be the Scrooge or the Miss Negativity or the glass-halfempty person. I would hate for my life to be defined by the things I dislike or hate. Instead I want to be like Maree – fun, joyful, a blessing-to-be-around and a beautiful person inside and out. A person who smiles easily with a word of encouragement always on her tongue. A person who brings the light of Jesus into the room simply by their warm presence.

Maree, Sue and Colour friends Confer at the ence in recent Sydney . Sue Peters is the National Director of Australian Baptist women and the State Director for Queensland Baptist Women. Her passion is to see women fully embrace the freedom, healing and grace that is found in our beautiful God. Sue established and runs the annual She Is... Conferences that are held throughout Queensland and in 2013 PNG. She lives in rural Queensland with her pastor husband, two daughters and a growing population of guinea pigs. She is unashamed of her love of big hair, big shoes, big cups of coffee, big blocks of chocolate and big earrings. Indulge | April/May 2013 | 37

Contagious Joy Words: Candice Schmidt Image: nasati

h the joy; a smile, warm greeting, an “I laughed so hard it hurts” moment, delights our soul. Our happiest memories are often connected to exciting adrenalin charged moments like the exhilaration of a roller coaster ride or the thrill of winning; however, true joy is a feeling of

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pleasure and delight that can be experienced every day. The famous hymn, “It is well with my soul”, highlights the internal state of being from which we can notice and enjoy the pleasures of life, like floating in the ocean on a beautiful summer day, or beholding a lovely sunset.

A study that followed 5000 people over 20 years found happiness can spread through three degrees of separation – our happiness can affect our friend, our friend’s friend and even our friend’s friend’s friend. Our joy is contagious and helps others feel better. Unfortunately our past, or the challenges of life, can crush our soul and erode our joy. It is God’s desire for us to encounter a joy-filled journey in spite of life’s ups and downs.

Joy Stealers:

hGuilt and shame – our own poor choices, or the harmful words and actions of others, can become a distorting lens through which we view life. Shame attacks our identity and affects how we feel about ourselves and others. Our guilt and shame must be exchanged. Jesus took the death we deserved and exchanged His life for us. Jesus took our guilt and offers us forgiveness; He took our sickness and offers us divine health; our poverty for His wealth; our rejection for His acceptance; our curse for His blessing; our shame for His glory and our sadness for His joy. Without accepting this exchange we cannot walk in true joy and hope. [Paraphrased from ‘The Divine Exchange’ by Derek Prince]. hUnforgiveness – joy and offence cannot coexist. As we have been forgiven by God, so we forgive others. Choose today to forgive and release those who hurt, abused, neglected, rejected and persecuted you. Past hurts if not dealt with give the enemy access and weigh us down with the “spirit of heaviness”. When we forgive we hand over the offender and our need for justice to God and choose to release them from “debt”. Forgiveness is a key to walk in joy and freedom.(See Indulge November Issue for more on forgiveness.) hOverdoing it – stress activates our autonomic nervous system. Constant stress over time can lead to burnout including symptoms of fatigue, irritability, depression, and hopelessness. Studies show excessive work, activity, and sensory overload (especially visual and auditory stimulation via computers, phones, TV, etc.) without quiet, restful periods, reduce our ability to feel pleasure, joy or delight and can destroy our creativity. hComparison – jealousy, envy or being dissatisfied with what you have, steals our joy. hAttitudes - if we drank water that came out of a rusty pipe, the taste would be tainted. If our lives are

full of frustration, complaining, fear, bitterness, and anger it affects us and pollutes the atmosphere. hVictim mindset – we blame and criticise others, including God, for what happens to us or we make excuses instead of cleaning up our mess and taking responsibility for our life.

Steps to contagious joy:

SLaugh often! “A merry heart is good like medicine” Proverbs 17:22. Laughter increases immune function and reduces the effects of stress. Laughter helps reduce feelings of pain and discomfort through the release of endorphins. Laughter helps improve our mood and shifts our perspective to see the positives in our life. We can watch funny wholesome movies or shows; surround ourselves with fun, encouraging friends and do something we enjoy. SCome into God’s presence - in His presence is fullness of joy. Sing praises, be thankful, rejoice in God’s goodness, and ask God to help us to see circumstances from His perspective. To rejoice means to be glad and to take delight. Thankful rejoicing is a key to powerful prayers and walking in peace and joy.

"Joy and offence cannot co-exist. As we have been forgiven by God, so we forgive others."

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Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls. A joyful heart is the inevitable result of a heart burning with love." Mother Theresa

SDo life God’s way - God’s way is not the world’s way. Romans 12:2 states, “Do not to be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of our mind”. Commit to purity, integrity, honesty, and be obedient to God’s leading. Romans 14:17 “...the kingdom of God is righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.” SHope for the future - Romans 15:13 “Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace”. Hope is the positive expectation that something good is coming. Faith and joy have their roots in hope. Have hope in His goodness and promises; Psalm 23 “... Surely goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life.” SSow into the future – We can take different areas of our lives (finances, family, work, relationships) and spend time thanking God for His blessings and “seeding” prayers for what we desire to see. Searching the scriptures to declare God’s promises over this aspect of our lives is a key. SDisciplined living - Often we spend time with God and life goes well, then we get busy and neglect Him till a crisis comes and we need Him to help us. Regular non-negotiable time with God helps us gain momentum and brings shelter from life’s storms. SFuel your body - Choose healthy unprocessed food, get enough sleep, have a rest, walk regularly. What we do, watch, read, play, and listen to, affects 40 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au

our mood, thoughts and our ability to feel joy. SEnjoy the present - we can suffer from destination disease; “I will be happy when...” Joy does not have to depend on changed circumstances. Paul and Silas found joy while worshipping God in prison after being beaten and persecuted. S Take a risk - "The walls we build around us to keep sadness out also keeps out the joy" Jim Rohn. Many of us live from a place of fear with walls and guards around our heart which prevent us seeing or experiencing the good things in life. In our fortress we can't fully engage with others and God. "Perfect love cast out fear" 1 John 4:18 - Take a risk to trust God and receive His love and fully embrace life and others. Nick Vujicic is an amazing example of a man joyfully living a life without limits. Born without arms and legs, he felt life was not worth living and he tried to drown himself at the age of 10. Encountering Jesus transformed his life and he found hope for his future. He lives life to the full including swimming and surfing. He is now married, has a baby, and is a motivational speaker who oozes a contagious zest for life. His joy has inspired millions of people. God desires for each of us to live a joy-filled life without limits. Joy is a powerful testimony to our faith. Our laughter, kindness, generosity, hope, peace, and joy can infuse the atmosphere and change the world around us. R Candice desires to see people thrive in every area of life. She has been married for 18 years to a Paediatrician and they have lived in South Africa, New Zealand and Canada but have called the Gold Coast, Australia home for the past five years. They have four children between the ages of six and 14. Her passion is to “Live well, laugh often, love much”. She has a Degree in Psychology and a Diploma in Counselling. She loves to help people live to their full God-given potential spirit, soul and body. She enjoys counselling and watching God bring healing and restoration. She is a trained facilitator of 'Toolbox Parenting' which offers families hot tips on parenting well.

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Book Reviews The Mystery of Mercy Close Marian Keyes

Marian Keyes’ writing has shown a talent for combining light amusing stories with weightier subjects that have been deftly handled. Her latest novel The Mystery of Mercy Close exposes mental health issues in a serious yet witty way through the character of Helen Walsh, a floundering private detective who is on the hunt for the whereabouts of a missing member from former Irish boy band Laddz. The problem is that it’s crucial that Wayne, who has gone AWOL, be found as Laddz has a sellout comeback show in under a week’s time. Along with dealing with her depressive episodes, Helen must manage her weak finances, stop her flat from being repossessed and make a newly formed relationship work. Helen is an unusual character that is quick-witted and sarcastic, not usually likeable traits, and who doesn’t appear to have a self-edit button. As readers, we get inside her head a little to find a dysfunctional woman who is trying to fit into a somewhat typical reality with her uniqueness and quirky, caustic sense of humour. What eventuates is a story with many laugh out loud moments, mostly about what Helen thinks and how she responds to others. Keyes has produced a multilayered novel that is sure to please readers who are looking for something humorous to read as well as becoming enlightened by some very real issues.

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by Gina Hamilton The Light Between Oceans M.L. Stedman

The 2012 debut novel for Australian author M.L. Stedman, The Light Between Oceans, is a story that explores right and wrong and how sometimes they look the same. Set in the 1920s, newly married couple Tom and Isabel maintain a lighthouse on a remote island off the coast of Western Australia. Their lives take an unexpected turn when a three month old infant literally washes up on their shores tucked away in a dinghy at a time when Isabel has just endured the heart wrenching disappointment of a stillbirth. Thus begins the first of a series of highly controversial decisions that Tom and Isabel make which will set the course of their lives and the life of the abandoned little girl which they choose to keep and raise as their own. If you’ve ever lost a child and/or desired a child of your own then you will find this story very personal and confronting. The novel takes its readers on an emotional ride when, years later, upon a visit to the mainland a discovery is made with devastating consequences which is set to threaten Tom and Isabel’s marriage and their idyllic family. Author M.L. Stedman has artfully written a beautifully descriptive novel which forces readers to emphasise with her characters without having to necessarily agree with their selfish motives. My fellow readers have given mixed reactions to the ending of the novel but I felt that events were resolved with a wisp of redemption about it. Be prepared for a few tears!

- REFLECTION SERVICE SAT 11TH MAY, 2013 - 7AM MARKET SQUARE, LAKESIDE, VARSITY LAKES White Butterfly Reflection Ser vice gathers individuals and families who have lost children during a pregnancy or infancy. This is an oppor tunity for men, women and children to acknowledge all the real emotions that may arise from losing a child, within a suppor tive, creative and personal environment. Many people use this ser vice for healing and closure, while others will create an annual memorial to the children they have lost. Ever yone is welcome.

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